Watch What Crappens - RHOM: Melting Shots

Episode Date: March 3, 2023

*Also avail as video on Crappens On Demand http://bit.ly/crappensvideo* Adriana tries to apologize at the Melting Pot Party on the Real Housewives of Miami season finale (S05E16), but will it be enough? And whose legs is Julia eating? For our bonus episodes and video recaps, join Patreon at patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens Tour Dates: https://www.watchwhatcrappens.com/2023-cheater-brand-tour/See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hey, Prime members, you can listen to watch what crap ends at free on Amazon Music. Download the app today. This episode is sponsored by Uber1. We've all used Uber for rides, and I love using UberEats for food delivery. Okay, hello. I mean, I kind of live off of it. But have you ever heard about Uber1? Uber1 is a membership that helps you save on Uber and UberEats. With an Uber-1 membership, you get exclusive member perks, like up to 10% off UberEats and a $0 delivery fee on eligible orders. It just makes sense. I'm always getting Uberes.

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Each finalist is driven by the same dream, to become music's next must listen. But to break through they'll have to dig deep, pushing their vocal, songwriting, and recording chops their absolute limits while keeping their feet and emotions firmly grounded. So who will break through? It's time to find out! Join Kelly, Sarah, and David on a musical journey unlike anything you've ever seen. This is Breakthrough. Listen on Audible or wherever you get your podcasts. Go to audible.com slash breakthrough. Follow along using hashtag BreakthroughXAudible. I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of you, Well, hello and welcome to Watch What Corruptions! I've podcasted for all that crap we'd love to talk about on Neil Proves.

I'm Ronnie, hi everybody, welcome to the show today, end of the week, we are so excited, sure you are too, over there, if it's even Friday where you live. But you know what, even if it's Tuesday, be excited, you're alive! I'd like to welcome my co-host Abestie and all around Perfects human being Mr. Ben Mandelker. Hello Ben. Hi Ronnie. How are you? Good Tuesday your back So good today. I know it's like you know what and somehow as cuz I drew the blinds and It's I sort of look like I'm in a cloud

You know, it's, I sort of look at him in a cloud. I sort of feel, you know, it's, it looked like a lot of them. I never know. I never know. I never know. I never know. I punch drunk love, that Adam Sandler movie, for everything, it's just, yeah.

That kind of filter. Mm-hmm. I was really trying to look like I was in one of those movies. What's the PT Anderson? I want to be in a PT Anderson movie today. Oh, so that's that. Oh, I was listening to him on Smart List. He seems like a nice person. He seems like a, I don't know, I haven't heard that's that. Oh, I was listening to him on Smart List. He seems like a nice person.

He seems like a, I don't know, I haven't heard that he seems. He's married to my aunt, my aunt's a loop, but I'm gonna get married off. That's right he is. He is my, my badging and my, so to get that kind of episode today everyone, get ready, get ready, it's loud. Talk about punch drunk.

We definitely are today, but also super happy to be here because it's the season finale of our favorite show and the winner of the crappy full best show of the year. Real housewives of Miami. So congratulations to you guys. I know that is a huge honor to all of you and it's gonna be on your gravestones.

You're welcome. And thank you, America. Thank you, America. So if this is actually the last day that you can listen to the crap, or no, you're gonna listen to them, but this is the last day you can watch the video. This was taped professionally by Moment, they're fantastic.

You can get the link for a ticket today over at watchupcrapins.com. It's also where you will find links to our upcoming live shows, which we start again on March 9th in Charlotte, okay? Then guess where we're gonna be after Charlotte, we're gonna be in Atlanta, that same week. And then after that we'll be in Denver,

Salt Lake City, Seattle, San Francisco, and that will be our March. After that, we're going to a bunch of places. So just go check it. We're touring through June. So go check the site. Anything you want to talk about today, Ben, before we get going? This is Crappens on Demand. So go to patreon.com slash watch for Crappens. In case you didn't mention that already. Crappens on Demand, you can watch us. Excited. Do we decide what we're going to be recapping next week in Charlotte and Atlanta? You would send me a text about it, but we didn't announce

it. We can start one back on Monday. I think Vanderpump rules. So the last two episodes of next week are going to be Vanderpump rules in Miami. All right. So we'll do pump rules in Charlotte and Miami reunion in Atlanta. Yeah Miami reunion in Atlanta. Sounds good to me sounds great. Y'all

Sounds great. Okay, so that's what we're doing there. It's been there is so we're super excited for that and Process yeah, so let's get on with it because it's a big one season for now. See you soon. I'll find huge huge super size episode So yeah, we got a whole big previously the season on Miami, which is like really amazing like that alone It's just like a great episode just seeing everything that happened this year. It's just great I have to say I was a little sad with the crappies Homeless not toothless that that dinner party won for best moment But honestly, I have to say I think my favorite moment of the year was when Lisa broke the news to all the women That she and Lenny were divorcing it that he has a new girlfriend. I mean that just watching it again

That was a pretty great just amazing. That's like an amazing amazing moment amazing bravo moment or pizza watching them all scream amazing moment, amazing Bravo moment. Or Pete's just watching them all scream. No! I always knew it. I always knew it. I always knew it. So we started off with Lisa is still talking to her mother-in-law or soon to be ex-mother-in-law Marina.

And Lisa's bubble has popped into the bubble being that she thought that Marina was gonna be on her side during this whole thing, which of course we knew was not never gonna happen, especially when Lenny probably said, if you go to Lisa's side, I am cutting off all your retirement money. You're gonna live a ditch in Fort Lauderdale.

Yes, at the end of the day, he still controls those purse strings, I'm sure, you know, so that wasn't gonna work. And she tried doing the whole thing with like, well, you know, you would leave him. You want to go out of town for days. You went to New York and this you'll leave him and this is what happens. You shouldn't have left him. And Lisa's like, Marina, I can't trust my husband because I'm going to get dental

work in New York. And that is his problem, not mine. And Marina's like, okay, I didn't think it stood up I'm going to get dental work in New York. That is his problem and not mine. And Marina's like, okay, I didn't think it stood up very well either, but this is what he told me when he threatened me with the bus bench as a little bed. You know, and he says, you know, there's no excuse. And what about him? DMing. DMing all girls on Instagram all day long.

And she's like, well, I talked to him about that. And he says, mom, I just was sending innocent messages. He's sending forced recipes, discussion about the horror. Very simple innocent messages. I know some I've been making Borscht for five decades and these people appreciate my masterpiece. Hard for me to be angry right now, Lisa. So Lisa's like, I've had access to his account for years. I've been seeing him flirt with this specific girl that I always had an issue with

and go figure he's with her now. Okay, Lisa's story kind of changes though, right? Because she's like, I cannot believe this happened. And now she's like, oh yeah, I know this fucker's been doing this for years, you know, which makes more sense. And I like the truth more because it doesn't excuse anything that he's done. It just means that that man has escaped a literal bullet for years and years. And it also means you should get an award for patience because there would be there would be a body in bed if someone was pulling this shit with me. And I hope I don't end up killing somebody one day. And this is used against me in court. It might be. It might be.

So Lisa is like, you would think you would care for me. And the mother as the mother of his children, so that way I could be the best mother for his kids. So why do you want to break me down? Why? And she's like, well, I talked to him last night and he is also very upset. And he's also so depressed, so depressed. And he said, ma, it takes time. And if you ever want to eat food again, then you better get on my side. So you see Lisa what I'm dealing with. You know what comes after time time. So he actually she said, I talked to him last night and I said, Lisa is so upset and depressed.

Lenny is an upset and depressed. Oh. And Lisa goes, oh my god, he's so compassionate, right? And she's like, yeah, so I was going through his phone and I saw these forever symbols and I love you and I can't wait to be with you. I like who said that within a week of meeting the other person, unless it's been going on for a while. I need Lisa to start solving mysteries because that's just amazing. So then Marina's like, sometimes, times will never be and it takes time.

And she goes, how about not flattening my face? How about that, Marina? Yeah, just, what can I do? And so Lisa tells us, I moved to Miami for Lenny, and now I don't even have that. I lost my best friend, I lost my husband, I lost my free plastic surgery, I lost my extended family,

I lost the guy that would say, hey, stop changing the codes on a wine cellar, I'm on to you. I lost all of that. I could be losing my kids too. God. And so little less. There's still a little bit of me. Playground place, you know, one of those indoor play pen things and her daughter runs up and she's like, oh my God, you made squishy slime So did Marina. She still has it. It's a doctor now So now we go over to Larza meeting up with Gerdy and

they're both kind of like wearing green as yellow things and Gurdie's like, oh my God, I'm gonna start calling us citrus chic because I'm wearing yellow, you're wearing green, you're wearing yellow. Look at it as you see, it's like lime and lemon. Have you ever seen sprite before?

We're like two sprites, like seven up. Okay, we're like lemon lime lime made. Okay, like obey your thirst. Okay, don't say right now, how good of a fight. So the talk turns to the Bahamas and Gerdes like, so did you like the trip? What did you think of the trip? And Lars is like, I thought it was like a good trip.

Like, is she like, what? Good trip. What are you talking about? And then we get the clips like, there you, there you are giving this barracuda look. Barracuda look. You are a cow. You deserve your life because you are a terrible person.

Yeah, we just dig it all into this. Lars is like, it was time. So, yeah, Lars said he was a great time. So, he's like, how was Marisol's party? Like, how did that go? And Grady and Noah Larsa's like, oh, that was really good too. It was really fun, you know, nice time.

And Grady's just saying that she doesn't wanna kick Adriana while she's down. And she said how like, Adriana at her video party was saying how like, oh well, I don't know what happened to me. And she said how Adrienne at her video party was saying how, like, oh, I don't know what happened to me. Like, I don't know what came over me. Like, I don't know what happened, you know? So, Gertie just doesn't wanna kick her while she's down and wants to help the situation.

Right, and it's a finale. So we need to like kind of get it together, right? And she's like, oh my God, you wanna like give her one more chance, like, because I feel like I need like a break, like. And she's like, oh my God, you want to give her one more chance like, because I feel like I need like a break like. And she's like, okay, well, my party theme is like a melting pot. Like, because you know why? Because we're from different places, but we're all bad as bitches in New York.

You know what I mean? Honey. No, not New York, she is. We're all bad as bitches. Honey. So I feel like if we could all work this out, I feel bad about the whole thing, you know what I mean? Because like, we need to work it up because you know what happens

in melting paths, like in what all different crayons in there. And then they come out to the same gorgeous crayon in the end. And that's what we want to do, right? Lars just like not really. I don't think like Alexia, like Mary start like to be honest, like, like I'm going to be real right now. I don't think like they're ready to see like. And Lars it tells us the area and it needs a spiritual person on the daily because you know what she likes us Her full things like and it makes you like question yourself like it's a person Yeah, it's like When you always thought your XYZ and this and that and you find out that you're just

L M N O P and that and this you just question that you're just L-M-N-O-P and that and this. You just question everything you've always known. So now we go to Adriana walking into a recording studio. Oh my God, this was unbelievable. I was shocked. So he's got, so I'm like, okay, he's just going into a recording studio. It'll be like some random, you know,

like 23 year old grad from like University of Florida or something. Like, I don't know. And, but it's like actually Emilio Estefan. And I was like, wait, what? Like this guy was like, he's a, he's a big deal. And so, crazy. And there's all these platinum records all over. And she's just walking down the hall in her sunglasses and she's like wow

platinum records and then we see Emilio Estefan and she's still just reading things that she goes down She's like mark Anthony J. Shakira Gloria Estefan ladies a Gloria Estefan ladies men's I'm like you're at the restrooms now In case of a fire break this glass and pull the handle Anything on the wall as you walk spy if you'll see someone making a choking It's like what are you now you're in the restaurant next door come back No shirts no shoes no service You'll see someone making a choking. It's like, what are you, now you're in the restaurant next door. Come back. I've gone too far.

No shirts, no shoes, no service. No service. No service. So she's like, you know, I'm deciding to really pursue my musical career right now because I'm an empty nester. It's like, that's totally reasonable. That's why I'm releasing a song that goes life goes on. But so do we just how we do it is I'm mystery, you know beautiful song

So everybody wants their mom to do when they leave put on the thong get on a table and start you know singing some fucking dance jams Go girl. Ampiness are on, on, on, fire. So I can really develop things for myself and do things for myself in areas I couldn't develop. Preview, you know, basically what's really, what's really making people money right now being a singer. Yeah, that's, you know, it's the good thing about being a singer is that it's reliable

and you're always going to have success with it. So Adriana is talking, she's talking about Emilio Estefan who waspined of the one and only Gloria Estefan and she's talking about how he's basically like every Latino musical artist or Latina musical artist has gone through him. And she goes, you know, he's either started them or touched them at some point. I'm like, let's change that language just a little bit. Yeah, the music is like, I know what you're trying to say.

But, and she goes, he is to us. What Dr. Dre is to rappers. Yeah. And she's now wearing like a big flower head do thing. And has she worn that before in her interview? I don't seem to remember it. I love it. So he's giving her a tour. He's like, Gloria Stefan.

Oh, oh, look. It's shocking. You know, and he's like, here's my first top gun. Is that what he said? Yeah, I guess he did the top gun sound track. Oh my God. I wonder if he knows Walter. I'm sure he and Walter must know each other, right?

Yeah, I mean, I'm sure. God, they all know each other. All those musicians. I see. I see. So, all the rappers. They, you know what, whether or not they know each other, they can always talk because everyone has a Mariah story.

That's right, you know what I mean? I feel like every producer, feel like even people that are just playing piano at home, like have a Mariah story, just because she's that storyful. So she's like, yes, all these first albums for Shakira, Jennifer Gloria, Celia Cruz. And she's like, this is the second time we're meeting. The first time you said, he said to me,

you have potential. I want to produce in you. As a query, did you guys meet? I heard. What were you doing? Why not? I don't like she's like, I just say it's right after she saw Kanye West dick.

She always has his strange connections to musical powerhouses. So he's like, well guess what? He's like, you know, I've written a song for you because you're sophisticated and you're a rich lady. So here's a song for you. It goes like this. I'm not cheap. I'm not cheap. That's why everyone looks at me. I was like, is she gonna be be doing the soundtrack for selling sunset? It was a very like selling Miami song like, I'm not cheap. I'm not cheap. I have Chanel and then she left search Chanel back. She's like, I do. I do.

Extra refills. Here's what you can feel a lot of me in your cup because I feel a cup. Not my best work, but we find someone who'd sing it, you know? This song is about a rich lady and somebody wants to marry you, but they have to know that you don't cheat. All right, that's how I'm giving you. Take it away. It's like, mani mani mani ame as, as, as, as.

So she's like, this man wanting to produce this woman Emilio is allowing me to leave my American dream and she's allowing me to get rid of some of these songs here here's a sequel called 21 22 23 here goes like 23, 24, come on baby, say you'll tolerate me. 25, 26, 27, 28, it's like I would love to keep this conversation going. But unfortunately, this gigantic tire I'm standing on top of is lifting. It's like, bad breathe. Hallelujah. In the moon.

Like, this is your last act Adriana come back Isabella come back who do I need to call for you Shakira answer this fucking call right now, man Emilio needs you girl. Yeah Adriana Adriana is the answer to that question of what happens if the rhythm doesn't get you doesn't get you say Adriana. Where the rhythm's not gonna get you, rhythm's not gonna get you.

So she's, you know, okay. So then, you know, I know what it sounds, it sounds terrible to say, like she's probably banging this producer, like I get it, okay, and I'm not trying to sound like a sexist asshole, but you can't help but think like Adriana whose music is like, eh, at best, okay? I was watching, um, I was watching Megan the other day, the movie Megan about the AI check, that girl sings better than Adriana, okay? Or similarly, but then it ends with Adriana going, thank you, thank you, thank you in his lap. And I was like, girl, are you blowing, are you blowing are you pantom? I blowing him at the end of this scene you go you listen It's not about how well you sing hasn't

Listen Justin Bieber still turning out hits that guy He can't hit you can hit like four notes max. It's not about me. Justin Bieber can't hit any notes. Are you fucking kidding me? Even for too many. Ha ha ha ha ha. Oh my god. Listen, there are a lot of Bieber songs I enjoy, but like, he basically sings like this. I miss the ghost of you.

I mean, he can't sing. He can't sing. Not everybody has to be Celine, that's what I'm saying. Just what I'm saying. What I'm saying is Adriana, it's about hits. It's about connecting. It's about being a star. And Adriana is a, you know, she's a star, sort of. Friend of, not star enough to be a full cast member,

but she's a friend of a star. Okay. It's like a little friend star. It's time for commercial. It's time for a crappin' school. I'm going to say something scandalous running. Go on. Plants are meat.

And not only are they meat, they're delicious, especially if they're from impossible foods. They taste like beef. Exactly. Impossible is making meat history this summer. Yeah, they are. Summer of Impossible. I am so excited to be spending time cooking my summer foods all that good stuff and guess what we can use Impossible sausages, impossible brats. I mean, it's gonna be a great summer for impossible foods impossible beef is made from plants and

19 grams of protein per serving and it's better for the planet and it's meat Plant meat correct, so if you're looking for something to grab for your grill grab some impossible beef summer of Impossible start making meat history today for something to grab for your grill, grab some impossible beef. Summer of Impossible Start making meat history today, just head over to the meat aisle at your local grocery store, grab some impossible beef, or patties, and get grilling. Hi, I'm Michael Patrick King, host of the official Max Companion Podcast, and just like that, the writer's room. Each episode members of the writer's room and I unpacked moments from season 2, sharing

juicy details you can only hear from us. Stream and just like that season two starting June 22nd on Max and listen to end just like that the writers room on Max or wherever you get your podcasts. So then we go to Lisa playing with her kids at home and I think her son is like doing another bunker like machine gun thing. You know, I'm gonna need you guys to move out of this space. Care Bears. Let's look into care bears. Right. Or you know, they just, they just learned how to make slime at the mix slime. How about that? How about like draw? Draw. How about do terrifying 2023 things that should probably

start ending soon. Yeah, how about crayons and a piece of paper? Okay, let's do that instead. But like, but he is doing, he's like actually like, uh, doing like a little kid version of like a, does that an emergency disaster scene? Because, uh, Marisol comes over and when Marisol comes in, Logan's, Logan's being like, we need a medic, we need a medic. A bomb has gone off, there's been a terrorist situation.

Marisol's like, what's going on here? Wow. And Marisol comes dressed like the clown she is, which I like. She's in like a full clown regalia today. And she's like, who's the only one? And Lisa says, Marisol Saul coming and enjoy the fight. We're bombing people.

Yeah, she's like, oh, okay. And I thought I was the one who was bombed. Get it. So I'm more shaken up than the martini I should have in my hand right now. She does kind of of what's the name? What's that um clown? There's like a clown comedian that sort of looks like Perez Hilton, you know Do you know the one? He's always in like all white and he has the ruffles. He has marisoles. But basically marisoles bringing his outfit

You know I'm talking about no Okay, I'm gonna look it up. I'm not, you know what, I'm not gonna look it up. Don't stop yourself. I'm stopping myself. Alexa, Alexa, Alexa, let yourself in and they notice that the daughter is wearing a dress with drinks all over it and I go, my God, there's a cocky dress on the little girl. So now they're all, you know, there's a girl's time now. At least it's like, get back in here, team of nannies, you know, put it back on the dryer, the At least it's like, get back in here, team of nannies. You know, put it back on the dryer, the dry cleaner's rack.

They just hang the children from there. Sure colors back on the rack and zoom back up. So, I got to love those things. So, I don't like see it comes over and everything, like you said. And so, they're just, they just have to have some wine. So, they're gonna just open up the expensive shit from that seller, because you know, Lisa's not gonna have much more access to those wine bottles.

So to like, let's open them in Lexus. Like, oh, what do you know? I've always wanted to do a wine tasting. So let's do this. So Lisa tells us, she's like, you know what? I don't give a flying fuck about what Lenny thinks. Does he care about me or about my feelings? I'm certainly not gonna care about his wine. Okay, everyone. So, you know, I get that and you go grow on everything.

You have a really, really terrifying prenup. I don't just feel like get what you need to get out of there first and then burn it all down. You know what I mean? That's. I support you burning it all down. But get your shit out of the house before you burn it down. You know what I mean? That's... I support you burning it all down. Good point. But get your shit out of the house before you burn it down. You know what I mean? Yeah. So, um, so then they're talking about Lenny, like when he comes home and she said that Lenny normally comes home at 530 and they all gasped because it's 637.

I'm like, oh my god, singing a way of talking massive shit about Lenny. Please don't... Go on 9-1-1. Go on 9-1-1. Go on. Number one. Go on. Number one. Go on. Number one. So then they start talking about Adriana. So at least it's like, listen, Adriana pleaded with me that I could help her repair your relationship, guys and meristles like, well, that one usually being my job is since I'm a manager. I guess that's your job now. Yeah, and Lex is like, you know, the only one

who can make it right is her. And Lisa is like, well, we all said to her, you know what, you fucked up. And she said it took her an hour before she even understood what she had said. And like, she's like, no, well, you can't be doing this. I then asked for forgiveness an hour later, by like text a week later. And then like, I can read you this text. It says, it says, my bad. My bad.

But actually, just something that I'm of course not prepared for because this is watch or crap and so I'm a goddamn idiot. I saw someone put a screenshot of this entire text app on l internet and I have it here in my phone. My phone is only screenshots. You know when I die and they're going to be like, wow, who did Ronnie love? Who can we call to tell him that he's dead? It's going to be housewives screenshots. That's all they're fucking is on this phone.

Okay, so it says, Alexia, I'm so sorry about my response. I didn't mean it that way, but it was wrong, my bad. I have deep respect and admiration for you as a mother and that was never my intention. My apologies, prayer hands. Wow. So it was a little more than just like my bad.

My bad. You know my bad. It was still bad. It was still pretty bad, you know. Puccaneer, you can never really stand up for Adriana. Not truly. Yeah, I feel that. So my bad.

So then Marisol was like, well, actually, that would have been, oh yeah, I already said that part. So this is like, well, you know, I just want to know, would you consider having a conversation? And I'd like to say it's looking at Lisa the entire time, like she's taking it like an eye exam. She's like sort of squinting, trying to kind of like follow along,

like, oh well, you know, Peter, is that an A? Is that an F? Oh, oh, oh, I'm very so, it's like, Peter is that an a S Oh, oh, I'm very so it's like only her me too That's interesting. So no one cares like stop you're not on the same level. Okay, you're not Now in this situation, I think she was the one who is should be more offended But always sing her up Alexi's ass. I'm still like, this isn't, Alexi was wronged worse here, right? Who do you think? I feel like Marysell was actually

wronged more, but I feel like the audience would feel like Alexi was wrong more. Either way, I just feel like Marysell will be quiet. Five-year-old battles, you know? Yeah, I guess I could see that like Marisol was technically wronged more, but the the comments about the comments towards Alexia or about Frankie towards Alexia were more they were cooler. They were like really cruel and they were like more disgusting. Yeah So anyway, that really matters who's worse. Okay, Adrianna is wrong period. So now all Adrianna has to do is just keep apologizing and stick with it. So that's my goal for her in this episode. I'm like, listen fighter. You know, I've picked you as my fighter in this video game. You just keep apologizing. Do not say anything wrong today. Yeah, we equipped you with a level 10 apology sword. It gives when you swing it, it gives 56 apology damage and just swing it. That's just don't don't switch to an axe of but you said,

okay, just stay with the apology sword. But what about the time? Like no, no, no, no, no, what about back into the box so uh Mary says like well I was just flabbergasted she was saying things for my about the chama about no I was gonna say things to me about my acts and Lisa's like well yeah that was

fucked up beyond belief but she's lonely and she's depressed and they both go no no no no no no no no no no no no at the same time like no way no we're not doing this no no no no no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, at the same time. Like, no way, no way. We're not doing this. No, no, no, no, we're not doing this. Not interested. So then we go to Julia and Martina going to a restaurant together to have a little date.

They'd like to eat with Julia and the Martina. Yes. Do you like how I look? Martina's like, eh, you look fabulous drawing. That was, you just got Martina. So I like, for some reason it cracks me up that they go into this restaurant. I'm Martina, one of the most famous tennis players

who's ever lived, is like, ah, reservation, under Martina. You know, it's like, if you don't see it there, maybe it's under icon of sport and entertainment. Thank you. Well, it's got a set having to do like never to Lovah every time you're calling her a okay and no and as a Nate. Hey, we know these and Victor not brick not brick. I'm eating at home. I'm eating at home tonight. Victor not brick not brick. I'm eating at home. I'm eating at home tonight So they sit down and Julia's like, oh, it's a romantic dinner. No dogs. No parents. No goat

So she tells her she's gonna be modeling next week for a designer and she's like, well if you Look as good as you do tonight. It will be fabulous. I look your lips tonight. Look very kissable. And the music's like, yes, I still am not comfortable doing dinner at home, but things are much better with me and Martina. So we have dinner for two in restaurant instead, big difference. Yeah, the scene is basically like, I was so wrong with Martina, but now I'm right with Martina.

Do you want to fuck Martina before we get child? And Martina's like, we should. And then they go, boom. Yeah, it's sort of a dull scene. It's not, it's actually a very nice scene. It's very nice. They're doing a good job of like buttoning it all out. You know what I mean?

Yeah, that's why this, this episode was actually very long, it's because they were, they were tying up all the loose ends. So now we go over to Nicole's house and Nicole's therapist friend Lisa comes over and they sit down on the world's largest sofa. It was huge. It was like another floor of the house.

And while they're sitting there, basically Lisa's heard that Nicole's dad's gonna come over and Lisa's like, does he know he's coming over to break down this relationship? Or do you think he's just gonna have some coffee? And she's like, oh no, I'm like, well no, I'm not trying to be malicious. I told him that you'd be here So like listen, I'm not trying to therapist him even though I'm having a little reset on the sofa with a therapist

But you know not trying to therapist him like basically I told him the ovens open if you must make a turkey So he's coming So only way I could get him to come over she tells us I'm just hoping he's sober So he comes up, he's like, hey, hey, hey, what's going on here? And he is sober, but he still talks in that, he's gonna be drunk in five minutes away. He's like, hey, everybody, good to be here.

And he's like, sit down, just wanna catch up, you know. So tell me about this engagement party. Because actually, I behaved, I behaved at this party. So hmm. So what does that mean? I didn't do nothing wrong. I didn't I behaved. That's what it means. And she's like, well, what is misbehaving? And he's like, well, it could be difficult to put up with me when I misbehaved, but you know, I behaved, you know, I'm just being able to time. So when you're used to it, it's normal. It's like writing a back might be a Behaving a misbehaved bike. That's me get on it pedal to misbehaved town

That's me. So what you're gonna get? Did you ever think about what would be like if you Ain't misbehaving so then Nicole's like No one to talk with So I got to misbehave. So Nicole's like, so my dad is like, he's like an old-school human man and like, he's used to living his like best life without like regard to like anyone else. And like, it's okay if you know for you to cheat and be malicious. And it's like, okay if you do not like come home and it's like,, if you do all these things because you're like the man of the house, you know? Yeah, he's like, yeah, you know,

I know that she wants me to be a better person. But I think I'm great. Like I think he's gonna say, and I really wanna try. I just don't know where to start. But he's like, I'm great, look at me. It's like, he's like, you know, I don't think I'm great, but like I think I'm fantastically great as a father, as a person. I do things my way, and this is as close as I can be to perfection.

A lot of things that you are not right, but to me, I feel like they're right, and I feel like they're right. They're new cars. Right? So they're getting nowhere. I don't know the lyrics, because Nicole's just looking at Lisa like C, you know? And so Lisa's like, well, I think it's very interesting because like on one hand, like it's amazing that like how cool is it to not give a fuck about what people think? I mean, that's great. He's like, yeah. She

goes, yeah, I wonder as someone who's been hurt by you, does that maybe come across as a lack of regret or caring? And he goes, listen, I've changed a lot about my life in the past 20 and 15 years. I made a turkey. First of all, I made a turkey once for Thanksgiving. You know, they sell it before. Now I make turkey. They sell turkey rosters. You can buy a machine, you put the turkey in it and cover the top. It's done I've changed a lot. I've changed a lot So Lisa's like, well, what would it mean for you to look at Nicole and say I'm sorry and he goes

I've said it. I've said it to her. I've been in many cards and I did a great job at it too I might add I always was like I'm so proud of you. I'm so grateful you're in my life. I'm sorry that my penmanship is not as good and I'm deeply sorry about all the times that I set the AC a little bit too high and I don't know, you're a cold. But anyway, I think I did everything else pretty great. Love your father.

All the time. I think that none of those are really just saying, I'm sorry. And there's a really long pause and he's kind of like looking back and forth for the exit sign, you know? Yeah. And at least he goes, I know, I know I'm a ballbuster, I'm a ballbuster, but could you just say, you're sorry? And he goes, yes. Now, you want me to do this right now?

No, no, she's like, yes. Yes, right now. He's trying to get to the exit, but the sofa is so large that no matter how hard he runs, he's just still on the cushion. Just like a bad dream. So he's like, he's like, I don't want to do it now. And Lisa's like, come on, do it now. He's like, well, maybe at one, maybe sometime I'll give it to, maybe, you know, I don't

know, maybe like 20 years I'll give her an apology but not now not now So he says I don't think I should have pro apologize for being who I am because I don't think it was appropriate for me to be close to When she was young because of my craziness So you know the man did go to prison for all he was doing while she was growing up and basically he's saying Listen, I was leading a life of crime and I had kids in my backseat while I was doing all this shit. And one time he took them to a pumpkin patch and he was dealing, he was doing some kind of deal, some kind of shadiness in the parking lot.

And he told Nicole to stay there and Nicole didn't stay there because she wanted to know what was going on. So she was sneaking around, they caught her, the car started freaking out and backed up and basically hit her. Like the car and the car. Yeah, she basically, she got out of her seat and was on the other side of the car and there was another car there on the,

and the person backed up and didn't see her. So she got literally run over by her car and it was actually a pretty, it was kind of, it was sort of a powerful, this is all kind of like a powerful scene because he's basically saying like I She can't be around me. I'm too dangerous for I'm too irresponsible for her like the she would be better off without me being around her

You know, right he's saying yeah She I was doing her a favor by not being there when she was a kid, you know, and so He's like, you know and every time she was with me, it was really bad because I didn't live a normal life. And so Lisa's like, well, so isn't it great that you see it as rejection, but then your dad sees it as stepping aside to protect you? And Nicole's like, yeah, he's crying.

They're both crying. And Nicole's like, yeah, I never thought about like that because, okay, so some of my Ingram resentment and grudge, like I can let that go because like I know it wasn't an act of abandonment or rejection and it's coming from a positive place. Oh my god, like, am I supposed to just drop my daddy issues? Is that how this works? Because I don't know, that's hard. At least it's like, listen, you're in TV therapy, so basically you're fixed now. Oh my God, well, that's really amazing. Okay, well great.

So that was a pretty interesting scene. You know, it was. It really seems like that was the first time he was really admitting that or realizing it, you know? Mm-hmm. And he's basically like, he's like, I wanna spend more time with you, you know, and she wants to try.

And he's like, let's go to dinner and breakfast or whatever you need. And then, you know, then Nicole's kind of feeling like, damn, like I wish we could've gotten to this place a lot sooner, I feel like we missed a lot of years, but we're gonna try to make up for the last time. It was, it was actually a really good scene. Oh, it was, and I hate to butt,

but, because he's like, Why, I'm breakfast, lunch, dinner, whatever you wanna do it because he's like, Why are breathless loves dinner? Whatever he want to do it. I'm like, but you still can't show up drunk with some lady. You just fucked in a bowling alley. You know what I mean? So then we, um, I mean, why not? Why not?

Then we see Alexia with, uh, Frankie for like kind of a little ending of their storyline. And basically she's just kind of taken charge of showing him things instead of babying him. So like she's talking to him while she makes dinner and having him open a can and helping him learn how to do laundry and all of this stuff. He's learning to shower on his own and do a lot of things that I think we take for granted, but he's like learning to do them on his own. And she's like seeing how important it is to like it's really hard to let go, but actually like it's the thing that she that she has to do.

And the scene kind of ends with him with her asking him if he's spoken to his dad and this week and he hasn't. And so then that's the segue that takes us into the next scene, which are these two, Peter and his dad Pedro and Pedro who went to jail for being a cooking dealer is wearing a shirt that says cartel on it. Which crown or cracked me up. Yeah. It's like Miami cartel.

And so this is weird having a Peter alone scene. I don't know that I needed this personally. It was weird, Peter and Pedro. I enjoyed it. So, Pedro was like, I was this personally. It was weird Peter and I enjoyed it So a bad girl was like I was talking to your mom the other day and she wants you to help her with a salon Like you you can see where Peter's mannerisms come from right because that totally had his Speech patterns and everything and Peter goes I'd rather go fly Goats bro somebody started now. He said I'd rather go fly kites bro. Somebody said, now he said,

I'd rather go fly kites, bro. I mean, what's in it for me? I was like, they're mine, ghost me. Excuse me for auto as a representative of the kite flyers of America. That's a lovely activity to do. Yeah. And what's in it for you is like a job.

What the fuck are you doing with your life, sir? Because I don't have evidence that there's anything and hotness doesn't last forever, okay? Well, yeah, that's already kind of kicked in so and Peter's like he's like So his page was asking about like what's going on with your daughter your girlfriend and everything and he's like Oh my mom's she's on my ass about like relations that ship stuff, you know I just like so annoying and pages like like, yeah, man, but listen, she doesn't do it in the bad way. She thinks she's protecting you.

I remember when your mom, like when her mom didn't want her dating me, I don't know why. I mean, look at me. I'm just like your all American guy who sells drugs and goes to jail for a little bit. But you know, like, I don't know why her mom is freaking out, you know? So look, no red flags about me, right?

I'm Peter's like, one day, I'm gonna pack my bags and like, dip. I was already gonna move to Puerto Rico. Literally, I went to the bank and got 350 grand loan. I must've moved. Oh, is that a threat? You're gonna fucking move? Go!

What bank is this? And what bank is giving you a $350,000 loan by the way And what exactly do you think that's gonna get you in Puerto Rico? Did you also do you know everyone is I think it's one of those things like you said last week like Americans assumed You were saying it in a Jua hello recap like Americans always assumed just because they're going to like a third world country or I think this this particular lady was moving to like Mexico. They're like it should be five dollars. Yeah that is so offensive you know. Home still cost money in Puerto Rico sir. I also I liked when Peter said when he said he's

gonna like pack up his bags and dip. I don't did you notice that he got a burps because he goes when he said at the end of the day I'm gonna like I'm gonna be the one to pack up my bags and dip, and he goes, I'm gonna exhale to it. I'm like, let's wait, let's hold up on that until it lets out that air. All right, now that's funny. So he's like, well, if you want me to do this alone and you want me to do this and that,

then change how you treat me. You know, it's nothing to do with money, it has nothing to do with taking all these trips. Yes, it does. Of course it fucking does. It better because you're going to need to make it somewhere. So. But now that being said, why does Alexia want Peter

to help with this lawn? What about Peter? Looks like he would be helpful to us a lawn environment. Like, hello, welcome to the Alexian Frank, you salon. Do you want your nails done? Actually, I'm looking for like a petty. I'm a hello, welcome to the Alexian Frank, you salon, do you want your nails done? Actually, I'm looking for like a petty, I'm a lot, it's too much, like stop, stop, you know what, it's too much, I'm gonna go.

Well, he's not gonna get a job anywhere else. I think it's one of those things where she probably opened the salon thinking, I have something for my kids to do, you know, or like for my son to be employed, and he's like turning his nose up at it. Yeah. When he could be like, my mom's fucking famous, we should make this into a chain of salons

that I own and I'm gonna inherit, you know, like just pissing it away. It's time for commercial. It's time. Raising kids can be one of the greatest rewards of a parent's life. But come on, someday's parenting is unbearable. I love my kid, but is a new parenting podcast from Wondry that shares of our freshly honest and insightful take on parenting. Hosted by myself, Megan Galey, Chris Garcia, and Kurt Brown-Oller, we will be your resident

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narrative designed to sell albums. Follow this and tell wherever you get your podcasts. You can lace an ad free on the Amazon Music or Wondery app. I'm full of crap and it's commercial. So now we go over to Gerdy's melting pot party, which has nothing to do with Fondue. And Gerdy is, she's like a rive. She pulls up and like Mano, her friend assistant opens up her car door. She's like, hi, hi, how's it going?

Is it good? Mano, get everything from me. Mano, you're sweating. You're sweating. Okay, like my friend, okay, be very careful with the poster in the back. Oh my god, you're sweating on the poster. Okay, get a new poster.

You're sweating. Does anyone get a towel from Mano? Okay, oh god, he just sweat it on the towel. Okay, this is terrible. It's disaster. Okay, do you have a mirror? A mirror from Mano to look at his sweat? Okay, good. I need that. Okay, Mano, he just went on the towel. Okay, this is terrible. It's disaster. Okay, do you have a mirror? A mirror for Mano to look at his sweat. Okay, good.

I need that. Okay, Mano, let's go. And then she goes in to this lighthouse studio and she's like, okay, it's me. I'm gratifying. So she starts walking through giving everything notes. She's like, okay, that one little detail is undone. I brought my bartenders from New York.

So I have the perfect five here. And we're going to have custom made tables that are are clear so you can see a floral scape under them And we have neon signs to welcome my girls with their name. Who does that? I do that. Gordified Oh, by the way friend. I need to get dressed. I don't know where my outfits are. Oh, they're right there Okay, could you pick them up and then take them to that couch and lay them out? Oh so hard Can someone could we get a mop over here? Mano's sweated all over the floor. Come on.

For a man. For a mano. By the way, I mean, the place, it was, it looked amazing and the table was so cool and all the details were great. But what confused me is that this is basically in like a large storage unit, right? And there's like this, there's like a garage door, there's like a, there's like a metal garage door that they put two plants in to cover it. I'm like, you know, like, the whole rest of this next seed, they're like talking in front of a garage

door. I'm like, could you put like a sheet over it or something or another plant or just like a neon sign? I was like, we can see you guys. We can see you. That's a gate thing hole in this decor. So then we get the getting ready segment and the song is tonight. The city is alive tonight. The city is alive. And it goes on and on. This is one lyric over and over again. But it's a million west of fun. I was glad to hear that the city was alive because last time I heard Miami was on fire. So I'm glad that I'm glad that everyone's alive. I wish we had Alexis from Real House was of Orange County here to give us the news on that. There is a big fire. but Miami's alive still.

They saved a child though, Alexis. Oh, good. Okay. So the ladies start arriving and they're like, oh my God, Gritty is amazing. And Mary's soul and Alexia are in their car and they're like kind of quiet. And Alexia's doing that nervous thing,

which is kind of like, I'm not even thinking about anything right now. Like calming herself and Mary's soul is like are you eating tonight? She goes I always eat. I'm looking forward to the cackles. So then Laura me while Laura is in a weird state tonight because she's like I Think we have to help Adriana. Okay, like I want to hang out with her She's pleasant, but like she's talking a place where you're not happy and like she's just like she gets and everyone's nervous But like ever everyone everything's annoying and we just have like fill it up with happiness and I don't know

I was thinking about seeing if Charles Barkley has a son she could date. I don't know, just checking around. She's doing it in such a bitchy way that I like, I think Larza was actually enjoyable this whole season. She was. This was Larza's best season of all time. I was super weird.

Yeah, especially tonight. She's like, I mean, what does she like want? Does she like want attention? Cause like, let me be honest, like, I mean, what does she like want like does she like want attention? Because like let me be honest like I'll give it to her like you're so pretty like you seeing You think so great like you speak 25 different languages like is that what you want? Like is that gonna make her act like a better person? Yes, she wants you to be nice start Yeah, I love that she's making it sound like it's this crazy thing. Yes, your friend wants some kind of love So you need to speak some kind of love language to her even though Adriana is still at fault and Adriana is very good at turning this all around like

I'm the affected web here. She's done a great job with it And then Gerdy tells Larza Gerdy has this bombshell she goes by the way Hurt people hurt people yeah Or in the case of Mano, sweaty people, sweat with people. Okay. So Julia is like, please, I want everyone to know. I am not blindly taking either the other side. The only side I take is God. Okay.

I don't agree with her. I want to help her. I feel bad for her. She is lonely. She's not dating tennis her. She is lonely. She's not dating 10 super stars. She's hurting. And the things she says are sometimes misplaced. So then Alexia and Mary Saul come in and Mary Saul's like,

Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Hi, okay. Is Lisa here yet? Can I say monkey also? Monkey. Oh no, just Hawker.

Okay, Hawker. And they've got a drink, a bus there. It's just for Mary Solas, says cockies. And Gurdie's like, look at this, because you know how you go to a party and then you have to wait for your drink all night and make it yourself, now bitch. So then Kiki arrives, Kiki.

My personal choice for a best friend of or family member in the crappies. Sadly, she did not win, but I think she was second place actually. So Larsa, she comes in, she just, just from your presence makes me happy. And then Larsa is again, she's just faunting over Adriana. I'd be like, Adriana, we love you so much. You're the most gorgeous woman I've ever seen in my life. I love you. Oh my God. What are you drinking? Keep drinking. Keep it going. You make me insane. I want to be like you. She's like, I feel like you need

like validation right now. Like so, like here's some validation. Boom. Stamped your card. And Nicole is saying, like, I think when she came out with her foot all twisted, like if she would have gotten like the all, you know, and the love from everybody and the attention, I don't think she would have made those comments, you know. I think like she just needed like some attention and that's how it came out.

And Lars is like, yeah, but like here's my thing, like I just feel like this is like totally me being honest right now. Like I feel like when you say I have no one and I'm all alone like hello You have us like we're no one We're no one like we're here To not take your phone call when you reach out come on

At least you have our voicemails so So no calls like this is like the second time I've agreed with Larsa and like maybe we're like destined to be friends. This is like crazy. And if you're on a ghost, I don't want to I don't want to bring my problems to people. Just oh my god, but you want to bring your pain? Like I'd rather like have your problems like your pain. I mean, bring me your problems. Bring me. Well, I got bring me your problems. I've got 99 foot bones, but the beach ain't one. Okay, those are my problems. So they're like pumping her up, right? And now Mary, Soul and Alexia come over and Adriana immediately goes up to them and kisses them. And then she

shakes Mary, Soul and like hugs her and Mary says like Don't don't laugh. Stop being like that. So she'll say you know that I love you She'll know you don't I'm not even gonna call you a hooker right now, all right Reserved for people I love this is a non hooker zone right now And she's like if anyone knows, you don't approach me with any sort of serious conversation until you see a glass in my hand and lipstick mark on the ram brang out loud. And they drown. I was like, I'm so sorry, baby. I'm sorry. It was wrong with me. I was wrong. She was, oh, you don't even know how wrong it was. Oh, no, no, no, no,

you made a word worth so many levels. And she's like trying to lean out of the hug. And Gertie, who does no Mary Saul, is like, before you talk, before you talk, here's the customer bulletin. She hands her a martini. And Mary Saul's like, oh, save private cash. Look how cool that is.

Save by the cock. So now they're dancing and having fun. It was like, the bartender has like two drinks on his arm. By the way, it was a funny gritty. He says at one point earlier on with the party. She's like, so I did everything. I brought bartenders in from New York because I wanted the drinks to be perfectly balanced.

I'm like, oh, you done this. Can only get a good cocktail in New York. So then I know she saw one guy doing that arm trick. I'm just like, I have to get you for a party. I have to get you for one of my parties. It's gonna be amazing. You do work. I guess? Do that thing with drink on your arm. Also that bartender was the most fucking obnoxious bartender of all time. He was so cheesy and smarmy and he just kept like,

even when they were having a really serious conversation and everyone else is kind of watching dowelie. He's over there like throwing cups in the air. I'm like, twirling a cup at his hand. I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like Even when they were having a really serious conversation and everyone else is kind of watching Dowerly, he's over there throwing cups in the air. I'm like twirling a cup at his hand. I think that I didn't realize that when Gertie said, I brought these guys in because we're gonna have the most balanced cocktails that she meant physically.

Literally balanced. Literally balancing on his arm. I thought she meant flavor wise, but no, it was like Cirque du Soleil for bartending So I give me the Republican side now tell me tell me what a Republican would think And bad it's cocktails, okay So Marisol's like bartender. Okay. I like my cocky extra staff So couldn't you give me like a corner room a mixer and more booze? Thanks hookers. He's a hooker honorary hooker everyone

and more booze. Thanks, Hulker, and he's a hulker, honorary hulker, everyone. So Kiki and Larza see the tables, they're neon lights or whatever, say, where they're gonna sit. And Kiki's like, why are they dividing us? And Larza says, well, Girty has liked this whole plan. I think she wanted like Adriana across from Alexia,

so she like has to look at it the whole time. It's gonna be hilarious, like, I'm honestly serious. Hey, Lexia, look at the seating chart. How do you feel about that? And Lexi goes, well, you mean, well, you know, like I like her song. If that's what I'm trying to say, I like her song. Yeah, but we should legit like give her so much attention

because like she's an old like girl, you're like the hottest girl ever we should be like and Lexi is like oh you mean like hot tempered and it goes boom Well, no she goes hot tempered or like hot down there. She bases like points out her vagina like hot down You know like she got hot vagina, you know Everybody's oh my god What I think she just needs like a lot of attention, you know, like X, Y, and Z.

I don't have time for that. My kids need attention, okay? So you know what? You got the wrong person. Oh well, you know, a Peter. So then Kiki's telling Julia that she looks like she's lost weight and she's like, oh, well, I eat our eggs on my farm at all, you know, Quel X two. And like she's like, oh, well, I eat our eggs on my farm. Oh, you know, quail eggs too.

And like she's like, quail, you eat that. And she's like, eggs, I don't eat my pets. And Kiki goes, quails are the little things that they go like rats. They like that, like that. And she goes, it's a bird. It is a bird. So then Kiki tells us, oh, so it's a bird, it quail, it's a bird, and she eats the legs.

Just like, no, the eggs. I just imagined a Julia with a quail. It's like, the bite of legs, how the fuck quail? This was like the melting-est part of the melting pot party. This was so fucking funny, I was cracking up. Also, I got the sense that Kiki and Julia are on good terms and I would have liked to have some resolution because the last we saw

was that Julia doesn't invite a Kiki from her party and like, I wanna know where they're at, you know, what happened there. I feel like that was a storyline that we deserved more of. Yeah. So then, um, girl, we just see Gurdie at work, which is so funny, because she goes,

okay, stand, stand, listen, everybody who works for me, I want to get them seated. So when I go like, this, that's what you do. There's six people here, seven people here, it'll be okay. So, um, Kiki's like, so Adriana, where do you find your song now? And Adriana says that the video hasn't dropped yet, but, um but the music's on basically Spotify everywhere. And so like she is like, oh well, I'm not great with you now, but I love your song. I didn't tell you that. Like it's like with men, you know, like you're an asshole,

but I say love you, like, and I love this song. Your song is like an asshole man. I love this song, no matter what, you know, because I can love everything about you, but I can love you, but I can also hate you. And I can love your song and I can hate you. That's how it is. And then Lisa comes in last, of course, always. I can love you but I can also hate you and I can love your song and I can eat you. That's how it is and

Then Lisa comes in last of course always and Lisa sees Gerdy and she goes oh hello green. What is this a funeral? Oh? I didn't I missed that line but clever no she clever Lisa. She didn't say that so But I would have thought you know what just for the same color to Alexi's mother's funeral right She's like wait, I didn't realize you guys were all wearing black That gets a funeral so then Fog starts to come out and he's like what is this thing in my vagina? It's fog and They do a toast that do a toast to gurdy and gritty like hold on everyone

I want to stand up I'm gonna stand up because I want everyone's attention because I have something very important to say Hold on this is like the prettiest part. Okay. I need your attention please. Oh, this is a pretty party of Okay, I'm gonna go to the party speech hello Right man. I was sweating the longer that you hold this off man. I was gonna sweat you know He's turning into a pile of water. Okay. Let me speeders before he dies He's going to die without the sweat. All right, hello bitches, I need your attention.

Bitches, bitches. And they're all like, ah. I love you guys. And that's the first thing I want to say first and foremost. Okay, and now start crying. Ha, ha, ha, ha, Adrianna. I can't kick you when you're down.

And like, I know you're going through stuff and I want you to be able to be affordable and to really share and break down all those walls that you have and it's to give and take life. There's a giving day to life and I really hope you really grow and appreciate your surroundings unlike Mano who just sweats everywhere. You know what I'm saying?

And the music goes, well, as it closes up on Mary Soul's face and she has a Wayne told his gurdy's turn. When it closes up on Mary Soul's face. And she has a Wayne Tull as Gurdies turn. When it's her turn, she's gonna be like, oh, that girl's an asshole, peering. Yeah. So Adrian was like, well, first of all, I owe an apology to Alexia.

And by the way, she's like, oh, yeah, she stands. She stands to give a second toast. Yeah. I said things that were very wrong. And it came out and I can't rationally explain why I said these things. And we have such a history and long friendships. And I hurt you.

And I love you. I love Frankie and Peter. And you probably have pets. And I love those pets. And I love everything you represent as a mother. And your strength and resilience always inspired me. Even though you couldn't learn the choreo for my music video. You still have a lot of strength and resilience. And she's like the face that she knows I struggle with freckles accident every single day she brings it up and I can't I just can't why

would you do that. And Adriana's like it was wrong of me. It was wrong of you. And she's like, I could only think I was having a mental breakdown. I don't know what was going on really, but I think that's what was happening. And Mary's still like, that is the worst excuse. I've been in a worst position than you. And I didn't do that.

That is wrong. And Adriana's being really good. She's just sticking to it. She's like, regardless, she's like, I was wrong. I love you's being really good. She's just sticking to it. She's like, regardless, she's like, I was wrong. I love you. I love Frankie. I respect you. It's a, but I was wrong. I was wrong. I was wrong. She's not, she's not getting fired up, you know? Yeah. I think she's doing a pretty good job. But then Marisol and Alexa, once they decide they're mad, they're not going to not be bad. That's just how they work, you know? So she's like, no matter what was wrong, I was, no matter what happened, I was wrong

and I'm sorry for it. And Alexi is like, I should speak louder than words. So I want you to show me and Kiki's like louder than words, do you eat legs? And Alexi is like, I want you to show me. Every time you're wrong, you say you've been through so much this and that. So don't remind me what I've been through because I lived it. I lived it. I know my past. And she's like, but I do it to honor you not to challenge you.

She's, oh, think about the words you use, bro, because you're not a teenager. You're not a kid anymore. She goes, but I own it. I am owning it. I should have said, Alexia, I should have said, I'm going through a lot and I need your help. And she's, and I would have been there, bro, but not through this.

He's like, but I'm going to a dark period and I need you as a friend. Please, I need you. And the same for you, Mary, so mentioning some we get my favorite sound effect. You know, mentioning someone part of your life years ago and bringing it up in the moment like wasn't really it wasn't really enough That's I thought that was exemplifying my loyalty to you and like but I wasn't right. It wasn't right Marisol Wow, so I don't think well, can I finish before you say no no no no no, I'm gonna finish I'm not gonna accept this apology I'm not gonna accept it because you fucked yourself.

And I've always defended you, asking anybody here. I've always made excuses for you. I thought you were my friend. But I am your friend. I am your friend. I was like, oh, you were self-hocking me. Say, oh, he never loved you. But he said that to me.

Not, I didn't say that. I was like, oh, but you didn't have to repeat it What's next you're gonna come up with a new ailment? Or just why you did that has that what's gonna happen next and she also because of my ADD I repeat everything Classic 80d symptom repeating everything yes So they're like all everyone kind of groans. She's like, oh no. Oh, no. She's doing so well.

And then it's so funny, because then Kiki's in Julia's ear. Kiki's like, you're doing good, Julia. You're doing really good. You're doing really good, because Julia's like, I just want to jump in. I just am biting tongue and lip. And just imagining dinner for three people. That's all I am doing.

Yeah, she's like, she's not a punching bowl. And so they keep going for her and going for her. And they're like, I'm trying. Listen, I'm going to therapy. And Mary so says, well, sit in your house and take a vow of silence for a year. Cause I'm sure everyone would enjoy that silence for a year. And this goes, she's not a monk. How dare you sell the reputation of a monk.

So Greg is like, okay, one thing I don't want to see happen are regrets. Okay, and you know what? Adriana is broken. Literally, she has no more bones left into her inner foot. If you look at it, it's like one does rubber chickens, but on her foot. Okay, she's broken and she know what she just needs a hand up to get back to normo seat. And Marcel's like, well, I would be a regretful if I didn't speak my mind because this is my

friend and we go back and I need to speak my mind or else we'll never move forward. And when am I going to get one of those cockies that's bouncing on someone's elbow for crying out loud? And now they're doing that thing where they're fighting for the last speech, you know? of those cockies that's bouncing on someone's elbow for crying out loud. And now they're doing that thing where they're fighting for the last speech. You know? And so now Lisa's like, okay, my turn, my turn. Okay, you guys say one day, I'm in that. Shut up.

Okay. These past few months have brought us so close. And nobody understands what I've been through. But I know Adriana. I know her heart. And she's genuinely sorry. You know, she's always been kind of a loner. Emery's so like,

ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. I mean, she's sort of changing the, the, the, she's the new face of the in-sell, but you know, congratulations to her. And, you know, we're all different and we all handle our issues differently. I cry in bed and then I call you guys and talk ears off. And I'm so grateful for all of you for everything happens for a reason.

And I'm just so proud that I can take a fight that you guys are having and making it about my divorce. So thank you, everyone. And Gerdy is like, guys, we are badass bitches and we run Miami period. And so Adriana is like friends forever. And it's just a boom. And she is like, you know, way uncomfortable. And she tells us in order for there to be peace there has to be two sides. And you have to show me yours. Sorry, show me. Don't say it. Don't say it. My God. Just let her apologize. She didn't like be rate, Frankie. Okay. I get that her using Frankie comparing at the accident to her stupid,

but thing was egregious and totally disgusting. But I think we might be going a little too far with it here. Yeah. Or at the very least, that's what you'll more of a great gri with Pink Zolt. He never loved you. Yeah. And on top of that, they're committing the cardinal sin, which you always love to mention, which is that they're allowing Adriana to be the victim. So, you know, Adriana is telling us, you know, I'm disappointed in Mary-Soul for not

wanting to accept my apology, but her life and doing the apologize. What else can I do? She gets that like falsetto when she's being humbled. Like, what else can I do she gets that like falsetto when she's being helpful like what else can I do but she's like very little girl talking no I'm just a girl people do spy and millions of fun what can I do what can I do just be a long time my dog Gurdie they take a group photo and Gurdie is telling us let me tell you a Gurdie store let me tell you a Gurdysort, let me tell you a Gurdys advice.

Sometimes there's a lot of kinks in the links. And right now our links have a lot of kinks. But I hope in the future we can mend fences of the links and have no kinks. Yeah, because she starts up by saying, not every chain link fence is perfect. I was like, oh yes, that's usually what I think of. God, look at all those perfect chain link fences. But they're not all perfect. Shockingly, oh yes, that's usually what I think of God. Look at all those perfect

chain link fences, but they're not all perfect. Shockingly, they're not all perfect. What? You mean to tell me there's not all those beautiful, beautifully shaped chain link fences are not perfect? So Adriana, we started ending things. We see Adriana we started ending. We see Adrian as little ending. Adrian started recording with What's His Bence? A Stefan and it's going great. And Mary Sol is starting up her own venture. Sorry, stirring up, because it's a cocktail line with a Miami celebrity.

A very bad way. I don't know the last time that a friend of, we're let alone two, got to have the ending lines in real housewives. I don't know if last time that a friend of, we're let alone two, got to have the ending lines in real housewives. I don't know if that's ever happened before. I'm sure our audience can chime in and say that, like, what happened on season three of, you know, Dallas or something like that.

But I've never seen that before, landmark moment. So now it fades to black. And then we sort of see the rest of the cast at home doing things while they get their final thing. So we see Gertie with her family, they're talking about going on vacation. And it's like Gertie and her family finally took their much new vacation to New York.

She left her work phone at the hotel for three of the five days. Yeah. And then we go to Julia, who's like, I realize I never have empty nest. I was a nest. I still have children. I still have got. I still have Martina. Everything's perfect. But then hers is we find out about Martina's cancer, which I don't think I realize that it was double. She got double. I mean, that's crazy.

Like, was it breast cancer and throat cancer, both?'s what they that's what it said stage one. So hopefully that's gonna be very treatable. So Obviously we want Marchina to make a wonderful recovery. We love you, Gerr. I know and then we go to Peter talking to Peter's like talking to Alexia I'm like, yeah, so I might like go to Puerto Rico because I got like a loan But then dad said I should work in this lawn and like I don't know and Lexia about like, yes, I might like to Puerto Rico because I got like a loan, but then dad said I should work in this lawn and like, I don't know. And Alexia's like, oh, well, you know, you can talk to me about anything you want. Anything you want, oh, well, you know, Peter.

And he's like, okay. And she's talking about how Peter and Frank do like the conversation. Peter Savings, that was his big thing. He's seen as a clean, saving face. And I was like, oh my God, look at Peter. He's fixed. Yeah. And so basically they went on, uh, Alexiantod went on their honeymoon in Greece and Peter ended up crashing because he's single now. And, um,

and says, maybe Cuban moms know best after all. It's been God. Uh, so then Larsa is doing an interview with somebody, you know, and they're like, oh my god, like, it's so like crazy to meet you Larsa. And she's like, thank you. It's like so crazy to be Larsa. And they're like, what about, what do you want to do? She's like, I'm going to live my life and have fun, like, live my best life. And they're like, are the producers about you online? I mean, are the rumors about you online you online true and she's like I don't know like what you mean like seriously Honestly not gonna lie. I don't know what you mean wink Says after months of saying she and Marcus Jordan were just friends Larissa finally made their relationship Instagram official and added him to her home screen And then we have and then we see Nicole's family, we see her dad isn't drinking anymore,

or at least he's playing. Great. I know. At least I really killed it. He's a paraphrist. And then Nicole saying, I have a high expectations, I, and I'm tough on those who are like close to me, you know, but like I'm trying not to put as much pressure on everyone. Yeah.

And then she's like got like a line of doctors coming out of her bedroom as she were. Oh. And then she, and then it says that in August, she and Anthony, basically sold her house to Jeff Bezos' mom for 44 million. But they still have to pay for prime membership. $44 million. Oh my God. Wow, that's huge.

So then Lisa's with her kids. You know, one of them is like shooting jurbs through the brain or whatever. And she's like, life is gonna be great. You understand, Bobin? He's like, I want to swim to offense and then shoot them. She's like, well, do it, well, do it. And then we see that their divorce is still continuing. However,

she did agree to co-host that Halloween party with Lenny and we see a picture of that. And the producers like, what was that like co-hosting with Lenny? And she's like, hold on, hold on, hold on. article Lisa claims Lisa with Lenny claims Lisa was romancing two minute Halloween. Hold on a second Lenny what the fuck what was that article Don't try and make it seem like all those ladies who left me what are you talking about you said this whole thing up And you had to send your girlfriend away cuz she had a restraining order on me So she didn't even get to see it and you got to do what you want to do Which was fair with other girls and have lots of girlfriends are good for you. He's like leave me alone click and another thing Here's you stole my North Carolina place. Guess what? Guess what? I went to McDonald's for 12 days in a row.

Okay. And I know you got the third piece of my green streets there. Okay. So you better give that back. I'm entitled to that prize. Okay. She's just going just wants everything full paragraph. And another thing. And he's like, leave me alone, click. It was the best ending. And then we get like, incursive theme. I know. Those are, by the way, very good ending cards. They were like very dramatic because the last ending cards

we saw were a Patelomeic where it was like, went, Dr. Wendy, or just Wendy, has decided to drink more water. And this one's like, Lars Epipid and confirms his romance with X-Husband's son and Lenny and Lisa are fighting on the phone over rumors. What a great season of Miami, my God. This was a good one.

And we still have a month of reunion festivists. So, do I look next week?. So I feel like next week. Yeah, I feel like it's only going to be, I could be wrong. I feel like it's only going to be two weeks because this was episode 16 and I'm Wikipedia. It says that Miami is only 18 episodes and on top of that, usually it seems like peacock likes to hand off from one show to the next. And so girl's trip is starting. I think on the 24th. So I feel like we have two weeks of reunion And so girl's trip is starting. I think on the 24th.

So I feel like we have two weeks of reunion and then girl's trip comes back. That's my theory, Kay. One very exciting, okay? We'll see. However they decide to let out. I'm here to eat it, okay? I'm here to ingest it.

Because I love this show, Kay. Great season, everybody. We love you. This is your last day to watch the crappies from moment go over to watch what crap It's calm for those links and also our two or links. We'll see you next week This show will be recapping in Atlanta and pump rules will be Charlotte show this week We love you guys. Bye Watch what crap ends would like to think it's premium sponsors

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