Watch What Crappens - RHONJ: A League of Their Groan

Episode Date: March 15, 2023

Dolores hosts another charity softball game on Real Housewives of New Jersey (S13E6) while Jennifer and Teresa explore the wide world of therapy.Watch with Crappens on Demand here: https://www.patreon.com/posts/crappens-on-2002-80065035See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hey, Prime members, you can listen to watch what crap ends at free on Amazon Music. Download the app today. This episode is sponsored by Uber1. We've all used Uber for rides, and I love using UberEats for food delivery. Okay, hello. I mean, I kind of live off of it. But have you ever heard about Uber1? Uber1 is a membership that helps you save on Uber and UberEats. With an Uber-1 membership, you get exclusive member perks, like up to 10% off UberEats and a $0 delivery fee on eligible orders. It just makes sense. I'm always getting Uberes.

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What happens What crap What What What Happens when there's so what if Hello and welcome to Watch Your Crappins, a podcast about all that crap on Bravo that we just love to talk about.

I'm Ben Madelker and joining me today is the wonderful, enhancement hilarious man, Mr. Ronnie Caram. Hi Ronnie, how are you? Hi! and joining me today is the wonderful and handsome and hilarious man, Mr. Ronnie Karam. Hi Ronnie, how are you? Hi. Hi. I'm good. It's perfect that we're doing Jersey today because I want to get a chemical peel and the lady's like, hey, now this stuff is tinted. So be sure you don't get it on your pillow or whatever. And I didn't look at myself, you know, but I just turned on this video camera to do crap and zontomad. And I look like a Jersey cast member. I look totally spray-tanned and look not on my neck, only my face. I think it looks good. I think it look good, Ronnie.

It's about fun. I showed up to the Jersey recap with the Sizzle Tan. All right. Yeah, I like it. I'm looking paler than ever, especially because I've got my blinds drawn, and so it's making it look like I'm in a cloud. I wonder if I open them? Does that make it, is that prettier? I don't know. Either way, it's crap ends on the hand. I like the cloud.

I like the cloud. Okay, I'll keep the cloud. There, you're at full cloud. It's crap ends on demand, so go to patreon.com slash watcher crap ins. And if you support us at the crap is on demand level, you can watch us do the podcast, not just listen to it. So you can see me and my cloud, you can see Ronnie's fake tan. And you also get access to our bonus episode.

This week we're doing below deck on the bonus. We're gonna be sort of recapping it there because nothing really happened on below deck this week. They're just at the point of the season where they're filling out their episode order. So it's like, yeah, man, below deck with Leanne to know. Wrap it up. Wrap it up. Yet another season of below deck that does not need to be 19,000 episode. It's people cleaning about. Okay. This show needs 12 episodes tops. Cut the crap below deck, okay? You're already on all day, every single day, except thanks to Scandival, because now they're finally playing some Vanderpump rules on the day on that. Yeah. Well, either way,

and we have like a million shows that we're recapping right now, and so Ed's going to become even more next week when girl ship comes back. So, you know, we're just sort of like managing stuff. So go to patreon.com slash watch will happen if you want to do that recap. Also, next week we are going to Denver and we're gonna recap Vanderpump rules in Denver. So, you know, pitchforks are welcome. And then the next night in Salt Lake City,

where you're gonna be doing the real housewives ultimate girl strip, Salt Lake City, extremely excited to go there because we've never been, I've never even been to Salt Lake City where you can be doing the real housewives ultimate girls trip. Salt Lake City extremely excited to go there because we've never been I'm never even been to Salt Lake City ever and Thrilled to go there because we have the real house with the Salt Lake City there. So it's always exciting to go to a bravo city and my nephew goes to college there. So how about that? So anyway, that's all the news. Go to watch crap and calm to get your tickets. Also, we're going to Seattle and San Francisco the following week and then we're going to be going to Philadelphia and Toronto in April. So that's all the news.

That's all the exciting stuff. And for right now, we're going to talk some real housewives of New Jersey. We're going to dig into another big charity baseball game for my monodies. It's a my monodies. It's a my monodies. So, some monodies charity episode. My monodies.

Something that has lived in my brain rent-free lately is pay back the bitch. See a better stop barking. The fuck does that mean, ma'am? I still don't know what that means. Pay back the bitch to start barking. I don't get it I still don't know what that means. Paybacks of bitch to start barking. I don't get it. I don't know. She's like payback to start barking because payback is paying back now. So like the barking is starting or or it's like, Oh, payback is a bitch. And like maybe you're like, you're

like a boy dog. And so the boy dog needs a lover. And so start barking to move the payback. It doesn't make any sense. It sounds like she's saying paybacks a bitch, Ronnie, to start barking. But if paybacks are going to pay me back, then why would I start barking? You should. And payback. You know what I mean? It just sounds like it just sounds like a bad sentence, not that that surprised us me. But it even kind of gets me to stop thinking about Teresa's line, which is still amazing too, about shedding blood and how it's gonna be thicker. It's harder to blow up. Yeah. She's spilling large quantities of blood everywhere, creating stains. So we open with the boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom.

Yeah, the 50s music. with the boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom I never conversation with you. I've seen better videos and gas station waiting lines. Hey, that's it. I'm not talking to you anymore, Valentino. You're blocked from my inspect. So then Dolores is with Paulie and she's like, Paul, I don't know what to wear. It goes, oh, that one's nice. Because you have that water when you walk. That's

why I'm always behind. Yeah, she has. What do you mean, waddle? I like the delurus always could kill you in the next line. It's like, what do you mean, waddle? Huh? Yeah, you better fix that flirtation a little bit. And then Margaret has just come out of surgery for her arm. So she's like, medicated, but she's still very margillic. And she's like, I don't feel anything. I'm like medicated, but like my eyelashes lasted. So that's the good news that was for you. Joe, look at this arm.

I barely touch it, and then it moves itself. Look at that, Joe. I didn't even touch that, all right? I mean, look, oh my God, look, my arm is trying to move to fix your shirt, and I'm not in charge of it. Even my arm thinks you look like a slob Joe. Go fix yourself, Joe.

Come back here, arm. Come back. Joe, look at my arm. My arm has come alive. It's already picking out a new pillow shoot for you. Okay, we have a C-phone pillow shoot. It's your favorite, Joe. I didn't even do it.

I didn't even control it. My arm's just doing it for me. So Teresa goes to the therapist. Okay, a, this is hilarious because it's performative. But B, it's hilarious because it's a therapist name and it just sounds like, it sounds like a Salt Lake City name, I think. Yes.

Teak and Sorvino Kile. Is it Kile? I thought it was Quill, but that's just because I'm super well. Quill. Let's go with Quill. Quill. Either way, I mean, we'll have to find out maybe it is Kile. Um, this episode is bookended by therapist scenes. They were being like, they're like, listen, for this episode, let's be thoughtful about

the structure. We begin and we end with a therapist scene. So now we're going to open up with Tegan. I was so with you. I loved that Tegan, Tegan,vino Quill. Just so perfect. And she's got, like, you know, she's really good because her office is like in a hallway in a public service building of some kind. And the wall behind Teresa is made out of glass blocks. I don't even think there's a door. I think you just walk around the glass. Are you doing this in a gym shower? Like what is this? Like in typical Jersey fashion,

like even the therapist office is from the 80s, you know? Yeah. So Trees, like, oh, this is, you know, hey, doctor. And Tegan's like, hello, you can call me Dr. Tegan's sort of Enocule. Okay. And Trees, like, yeah, you know, this is a big time for me. Can you believe I'm getting married?

I'd be in therapy for six months. And like I would always against it. But like just because I thought I could fix myself, but like, I didn't like the way I reacted towards Margaret. And so even though it felt like it was valid, what I did, you know, throwing drinks and stuff, like Louis is very into therapy and he said like I don't have to react that way so I'm gonna react in less fun ways for me. So Churri said this is why nothing works as Theresa.

She's in therapy. Now she's been through this therapy session, possibly multiples and now she's had the time to think about it and then talk about it And she's still saying even though I think it was valid. Okay, then you have not learned the fucking thing Teresa Okay, not one fucking thing and I like that when she said you know I regret how he treated bars and then it just cuts to the reunion where she goes oh Shut the fuck up you stupid bitch And then post back like I'm a better person now.

Basically, Louis making her go. Did you sort of feel like this therapist was just like Kathy Wikele at a costume? Like this is like Kathy's like doing a Mrs. Doubtfire, like Mrs. Therapy Fire, because she's like, I can't talk to my cousin to recess if she sees my face. So I have to be in costume pretend to be a therapist, because she looks just like Kathy Wikele. my face. So I have to be in costume pretend to be a therapist because she looks just like Kathy Wikile. I think she's like New Jersey's answer to that lady with the big hair that Jennifer Gray is playing in the new HBO Max documentary. It was based on the lady who started that cult with the hair that was higher to heaven. What was her name? Do you know what I mean? Jennifer

Gray is. Jennifer Gray is playing her. So you know how they made that HBO documentary Oh, yeah, but the lady religious harsh crash crash lady. No, she got an airplane crash. Yeah, I didn't know there was an HBO movie Like scripted version of that. Hey, let me get it right because Jennifer. That's amazing. Yeah, she's playing Gwen Shamblin. Gwen Shamblin was her name. Gwen Shamblin starving for salvation. And it's going to be a lifetime movie. So yeah, that's a little part from HBO actually. I think the therapist is New Jersey's answer to Gwen Shamblin.

That's what I'm getting. That's a very long way around that one, but sorry. Can we just, can we compromise and say it's Kathy Wikele and I think when Shambling costume? Okay, so well, I feel like Kathy Wikele would be like, here, I've got one question for you. Why am I looking after your children? Your children, no one's watching your children right now. Teresa.

So, so to you again saying, Dr. Cheegan saying like, so you love how calm Louis is and you're working on being that way. And she's like, yeah, I guess that was like my way of just fixing a problem. It's like lashing out, cause I just wanna fix things, you know? And like, I guess my delivery is not always the way it should be.

And then they just cut to her throwing a million glasses across the table at that Margaret. No, probably not the best living. I agree. It's like 2012 table toss. 2013 glass toss. 2014, another glass toss. 2015, another glass toss and a strangle.

2015, strangling a cat and throwing it in a Marriotti band 2016 throwing a little small Marriotti band member in Timolissus face More and more it was like when she said I guess my delivery is not the way it should be is like you could just see the editor Slow-mo pressing the button that says Teresa table flip footage like you just sought coming yeah So Teresa's like yeah, he's teaching me to approach things differently. So now I just carry a knife so I don't got to threaten people with glasses no more. And she's like, yeah, and then there was boys, my, and that didn't go good because my brother told Joe the fuck, my brother told Louis the fuck off like 10 times. And Louis said, said don't worry because he's in pain

He's in pain about that. Yeah, he's a real compassionate guy Yeah, so I call him and I said like are you ready to make peace and he said yeah, but they didn't come to the house woman party Yeah, I don't want it was to make peace, but then he didn't go to recounts poppy party song So how did that make you feel Teresa? Well, it was very helpful like it was sad like I looked around and like I wish my parents were there to see the new pizza I'm and then like my brother wasn't there So that was like kind of weird and like I only have my brother and that's it and like by nieces and nephews and that's it I Don't even have any children of my own like oh

I like guys is my brother and his wife and their kids and that's it and then my cousins that I don't Talk to and then my other cousins so I don't talk to and then my other cousins Like you've had so many chances that you guys just blow over at home. I don't wanna hear your pity party about how you have no one. Exactly. Just the way things are, does that worry you? Yeah, cause like growing up my father and his cousin,

they didn't talk for six years over like $200. Okay, like my dad was like no joke. Okay, he was very strong and he was like stubborn and he like never told me he loved me But like I got my daughter. Yeah, to say I love you. And that's how he's saying I love you And that's when he's talking making an octopus at six in the morning, you know, I Guess that's how they was raised growing up. I didn't grow up with my cousins But I want my kids to grow up with their cousins because my kids went to Antonio, sweet 16, but Antonio didn't come to Melania, sweet 16. She and Melania was like this. I just want these cousins to talk because cousin should always talk. Are you

going to reach out to Catherine? We can't fuck that bitch. Yeah, I don't even help. So she says, yeah, Melissa said that she couldn't come to the sweet 16 party because she had its cheer competition. I was saying, she was so hard at it. Yeah, but that's a real thing at cheer competition. I don't think you can just skip those. I don't know. No, no, at cheer.

Those cheer ladies don't fuck around. I'll tell you that much. My niece is in cheer and it gets dramatic over there. Okay. Those ladies get very upset. If you miss anything, they, I mean, I've heard them talking after the cheer competitions and I'm like, you, you people are terrifying me.

I would, I'm so glad that I wasn't, because there are a lot of boys in it now, you know? Basically the boys run around and they just like pick up girls. So like, okay, here's your station. Run, pick up this girl, then throw her, then run and pick up that girl and throw her and then run and pick up the guys get used to do that. But there are guys in it,

and I'm just so glad I showed no aptitude for that because it's terrifying. No, I would, no. Cheerate, cheer is not for me. So then Teacans like, so, you know, it's important to pursue a path that your dad never got to. And she's like, yeah, but I'm like, I'm so scared, like Joe, when he's like loses,

he's temperate, like that's so scary on me. And she's like, well, when you were a kid, looking at your dad, you were petrified. I was like, yeah, yeah, what's petrified? I'm like Theresa, Theresa has thrown so many projectiles over the course ofified. I was like, yeah, yeah, what's petrified? I'm like Theresa. Theresa has thrown so many projectiles over the course of this. I know. And Joe doesn't check her at you.

She said Joe doesn't to her too. She's like, yeah, my brother's temple is on a control like I'm scared. Like he slammed the table. Yeah, Theresa, so do you. And then it cuts to Joe later. He's like, she's so scary Can't even be around you know what temp is like it's like she's terrifying All I know is that like taco city is scary. Excuse me taco city

You mean toxicity. Yeah Scary. Oh, and he's like, here, I think you're being triggered. It's memories of your dad that's triggering you. And she's like, you can choose to make a stop with your choices. And if he doesn't live, if he doesn't listen, then moving on is your only other option. But also if he doesn't live moving on. If you choose to murder your brother, moving on will then also be an only option. The only option here is for him to move on to another spiritual plane, okay.

So then we go to Marge's house and she's calling Fessler or something and she's like, oh, hey baby, what are you here? I'm not running all of us, so just come around the back. Joe, fix this, it hurts. I'm wearing a cape for first. Lafict, my cape, Joe. Alright, not all heroes have capes, but this one does, and it's got first sleeve, so get it fixed. I got a nice iced coffee and a nice big wine glass with

a bright green straw coming out of it. I mean seriously, does anyone do broken wrists better than me? Oh my god, my hand, My hands operated on its own again. Oh my god. Look what it's doing. It just picked up a tiny slice of a mandarin orange. Oh okay. Now I'm holding it in a little manly way.

Oh my god. My hand is amazing. Look. It says I deserved more and... BEEK BEEK BEEK BEEK It just seems some foam for me. This is amazing. I don't think I want to ever get rid of this arm.

My hand is now balancing some Snickers cream around it. How lovely. It's like a little display. So Jen's bad luck comes in. Well, I'm not sure. Yeah, go ahead. It's just like listen, I feel good piss injury. Okay, I can still use my arm. Joe is still webbing my ass.

Hopefully, that'll be done soon. It's not very sexy. I mean, but he's a plumber. To him, it's just a job. Okay. That was a good plumbing joke for you, Jen him. It's just a job. Okay. That was a good plumbing joke for you, Joe. Oh, for you, Joe.

Okay. So she sits in her backyard with her cape, dead. And she's like, oh my God, what did you bring flowers? I loved you. I would get up to meet and greet you, but I can't. Joe, take the flowers. Oh, my arm is taking the flowers. But just turned it to a rabbit.

This arm is amazing. Fantastic. Go along with a little bunny. Got my life. Would you like an individual slice of Mandarin orange? Cause I have one in my hand right now. Why wasn't my choice? So, um, uh, Marge is like, all right, so this,

and I went in for surgery. They had to re-break my arm, my prized possession. Okay, my forearm's in my prized possession. Have you ever seen such forearm senior entire life completely hairless and pale? I mean, they're amazing. What do you do? Wax, laser? Do you just just dip them in honey and lick the hair off it? What's going on? No, it's natural. I told them, you know what? My new arm has to be just like this arm. I'm gonna want to read. I'm gonna want to refund on this arm. All right, it's gotta be the same. So I don't know if they made it the same, but apparently it seems milked now.

So that's good. And no magic. So. Honey, you gotta slow down. You're not gonna go to the baseball game. Oh, you're not gonna go to my monotony. So yeah, that's crazy. And she's like, of course, you going,

you go to baseball and she's like, oh, nobody needs to see me run, honey. Nobody, nobody needs that. She's like, what, don't worry, because last year, Jen fell right on her face. Okay, thank God she had head gear on, because she'd already used all the air miles to go to Turkey for that first nose job.

She'd got to save up before she can get another one me. My arm just said that was for you, Joe. Oh my God, my arm is doing the Arsenio, the Wu thing. Oh wow, I'm just a real late night icon right now. So then, now we go to Jennifer's house. We're like, shockingly, we're seeing the kids sort of clean. Olivia's got a vacuum cleaner and the brother. I still don't know the brother's name. It's just like Olivia's brother's his name.

And they're like cleaning and Jen goes outside with Bill and He's like, mm, that's your coffee girl go get that coffee and put it between your lips and just take it down your throat girl Olivia got to it first so she had some sips. I don't think she'll be waiting tables anytime soon Yeah, well, they're all coupled today, Mr. for excitedness is no more school. School's out for summer, baby. Commissures. Here comes one right now.

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Zipper Cruder, the smartest way to hire. I'm going to say something scandalous, Ronnie. Go on. Plants are meat. And not only are they meat, they're delicious, especially if they're from impossible foods. They taste like beef. Exactly.

Impossible is making meat history this summer. Yeah, they are. Summer of impossible. I am so excited to be spending time, cooking my summer foods, all that good stuff, and guess what? We can use impossible sausages, impossible brats. I mean, it's gonna be a great summer for impossible foods. Impossible beef is made from plants and 19 grams of protein per serving, and it's better for the planet. And it's meat! Plant meat! Correct! So if you're looking for something to grab for your grill, grab some impossible beef.

Summer of impossible. Start making meat history today. Just head over to the meat aisle at your local grocery store, grab some impossible beef or patties and get grilling. So then she's like, okay, now listen here. I don't want you to be nice to me. Wait, what do you see? Cause she started with me again at Festlis Party.

She said to you told me listen, that I tell her leave Joe for a baseball player. I'm not gonna hurt that's what she said. And, cuz this was coming from Margaret's friend Laura, and of course Margaret got all worked up. And she called me a disheveled drug addict. This isn't a sheveled. This is a shampoo commercial baby. Literally the monologue of a disheveled drug addict, so And then she goes you're just an albino in a wig

That's so mean. It's albino's meaning like don't like don't make You know so then me Jen is just so unhing. Her husband looks like he's barely hanging on. I'm honestly shocked that he's still here. I totally thought he would have left during the off season, okay, but he's still here. He looks like he's barely hanging on. And then Jen just starts dumping all of this terrible behavior on him.

And he is just trying to bite his tongue. You know, every time she sees him, she's like, oh yeah, I guess what? I went to a party, I got kicked out of it and called Margaret to see when, weren't like, Oh yeah, I guess what? I went to a party. I got kicked out of it and called Margaret to see where one turned my side, Bill. Why? And then in Drew 1950's crime movie, confessional style, she tells this. You know what? Not a smoke marijuana. It's after my children go to sleep. Last time I checked

it was legal. Missed us, you better release me from this jail, okay? And she goes, Margaret has this habit of finding anything negative and thrown it in the face. No matter how it's gonna affect my life. Like, who are you talking about it? You do that all the time. You're the one coming after Margaret. Margaret made up with you. You're the one constantly coming after Margaret.

You're the one constantly calling people, quote unquote digging because that was last year's thing. It's like you dig, you dig Jennifer. I wasn't doing. I was just curious. Get going, get fall to girl for being curious. Get your parents. Curious to be, literally killed the cat. She's sending them mad at me. She said I was a cat now. I'm not a cat. You're the crazy cat around here, Mr. So, um, yeah, Jen's like, and then Jen, Jen Faslin was like, you have to leave and I was like, Where had you been, baby?

And I see it's like laughing and bills just looking at her like, oh, geez. All of these women need boobs and face jobs. Who are they gonna call? Ghostbusters, please be brave. So then we go over to Martin back to Martin. She's like, do you think Jens Maddie, because she booted her out and Fester's like, oh, I know she's not.

I know she's not, because she texted me. She texted me about you. Martin's like, what? Because Martin was expecting, she was like, oh, Jens Fester's mad at you. And she thought Jens Fester was like, oh, Jennifer's mad at you. And she thought Jen Fetzer was like, oh, she's so mad at me. Okay, we can be allies against it, this evil person.

But she's like, wait a second, Jen Aiden's okay with you. She's like, she said I'm sorry. Yeah, she's like, I'm sorry, I yelled at your house, but your friend wouldn't stop poking at me. She's up poking, that is so funny. That is hilarious Funny that is hilarious Which is that you are ruthless my arm is writing something my arm is writing LOL in the air

I mean hilarious isn't it on hey Joe? Can we get an easel over here? I think Margaret's arms trying to use the dictionary okay? Wait is your hands saying I'll never tell that straight. That's crazy Wait, is your hand saying, I'll never tell? That's straight, that's crazy. I'll never tell. So, Fest is like, and she called the Ruthboot. So she goes, oh, what a loser. Just listen.

I just want to say, Margaret, that display was not you, okay? Yeah, you're right, you're right, it wasn't me. It was my new arm. I can't control it sometimes. Sometimes it's very helpful, but. It wasn't me. It was my new arm. I can't control it. Sometimes it's very helpful But sometimes it's very rude. It's not my fault. You're saying these really mean 16 year old things to her mods. You're right You're right. Halleur, but you know what? Even a 16 year old can be hilarious and devastating. It's not my fault There's nothing adult thought about the way the Margaret loses her shit. She completely lost control Oh, yeah, Fezzer. I love when the newbies act like this.

Like these women and then by next season, Jen Fessler is starting everyone's homes on fire. I know, because I was like, why is Jen Fessler only a friend of? She seems like she's a full on real housewife material. I was like, oh, this is why. Because she's holding on to this thing that they as women can rise above.

We've seen this a lot over the past year with like, um, sherry and monietta to, I think that they both were like, we're women. We don't have to act like this. Bravo doesn't like that. Bravo. They don't. And that's why you usually, I mean, I advise people, usually I find myself advising people, listen, if you start a show, skip the first season because usually it's this.

It's like, we need to all support each other, we're gonna be different, we're all gonna lift each other up. You need to get to season two, okay? That's when all that shits out the window. Yeah, exactly. So, yeah, it's like last week when Fesler was like, I have neighbors, could you guys stop yelling? It's like, oh, you've just been demoted to friend of.

So Jen is like, so, Jessi? You know what? Jen Festi seems like a rational person. I'm surprised she wasn't disgusted by Margaret's behavior. And the Lord says next to me like, a fuck in me, baby. Letting her friends spend a venim. Everyone's just sat there and then let me, let her rip me apart because she is, she's not all of them. Which is funny because I was like,

oh yeah, it wasn't the season supposed to be about Dolores and Jen having a few, it's the Margaret God of the Middle. Like, this should be the Dolores go after Jen. Yeah, well, she keeps pulling Margaret in the middle because she keeps going to every lady and think, don't trust Margaret. So, Jen is like, she ripped me apart and they say silent because she's got turned on all of them. And that's why no one says anything to Rabatta. So, Jan is like, she ripped me apart and they say silent

because she's got turned on all of them. And that's why no one says anything to Rabatta because they know she's an evil master puppeteer. Bill's just like, mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Bill's definitely not listening. So Martin's like, I mean, you know what? You can't have an adult conversation with her, okay?

Well, you know what, if you're gonna go if you're going You're gonna go see her at this game. Are you prepared to see her at none of my monodies game? I won't say listen. I won't I won't say a get say a game. I won't even see I Need to go down I'm not gonna say a thing. I'm not gonna say a thing. I'm wounded. I am wounded and But I'm not gonna say a thing. I'm not gonna say a thing. I'm wounded. I am wounded.

And Fessah's like, at least say, she goes, no, I'm not gonna listen. I'm gonna give you a heads up. I will not even acknowledge her. She goes, you're not doing it for her. You're doing it for you. Absolutely not. No, I know I said awful things.

And you know what? She asked for it. She said, Margaret does have, not nice. Not nice, Margaret does. not nice, not nice, Margaret. Not nice, not nice. So now we go to Paul's house and Paul's making some coffee for Dolores.

Dolores like, thanks for picking me up in the shower last night when I fell. Paul. Well, I'm from, you know, listen, hold on, I'm frothing some milk for you, because you're lagging. I'm just like, oh yeah, you're making me coffee. Thanks for doing that. I'm like, oh, I've got to do it for you. I'm just like, I don't know how to do that. So, you know, I'll just spray it.

Well, of course, you're a woman. Let it, let it just wait. This is some man frothy of God. For man frothy. I really, now let me tell you something while I froth this film. I really think that what saved you as your ass Your ass is what what saved you I think yeah, cuz she bounced up she fell down But her big big ass bounced her back up. Yeah

So the dad comes over and she's like, you know what my dad loves you. You know why because I'm a man Because you're a man. A real man. So the dad brings his own two liter of soda and comes with a dad colab bottle. She's like, Dad, what you bring your own soda now? And he goes, you know, why don't I want to put you out? I mean, it's okay, Dad. You can bring us sodas. Like, you know, I was very nervous the first time Paulie met my dad because my dad can be very intimidating. Do you know how scary it is to come face to face with a man who's brought his own Coca-Cola bottle? It's terrifying.

So then we see a clip of Dolores and Larry talking and she's like, Dad, I was always, you know, my boyfriend's were always afraid of you growing up and he goes, I don't know why, just because you would clean your gun in front of him, dad. That's why. My dad always worried about me being alone and he liked that. Paulie would say, I'm not dating to date. I'm dating for a future to find someone to do river dance with me. My dad loved that. Always wanted me to do line dancing. But I'm telling you, the magic words were when he said, hey, Paulie, Dolores is going

to get up and walk out that door. And Polly said, she better not open it because that's a man's job. My father was in love. Putty in Polly's hand. Putty in his hand. Yeah. So Polly, it's going to have a heart procedure because it sounds like he has what's it called? What his heart is beating out of rhythm. What's, you know, you know, I don't know, whatever. It's over excited. It's finding the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow here with Dolores. And he's like, yeah, a family will be with you as long as you need us, kid.

Okay. And Dolores tells us it's been so long for me to find someone like this. And I don't want to lose it for any reason. Frank, a heart attack, you know, it's been weird going so many episodes without someone close to me going to a hospital. So I'm in a weird way, I'm in a hospital. I'm in a hospital. I'm in a hospital. I'm in a hospital. I'm in a hospital. I'm in a hospital. I'm in a hospital. I'm in a hospital. I'm in a hospital. I'm in a hospital. I'm in a hospital. I'm in a hospital. I'm in a hospital. I'm in a hospital.

I'm in a hospital. I'm in a hospital. I'm in a hospital. I'm in a hospital. I'm in a hospital. I'm in a hospital. I'm in a hospital. I'm in a hospital. I'm in a hospital. I'm in a hospital. I'm in a hospital. I'm in a hospital. I'm in a hospital. I'm in a hospital. I'm in a hospital. I'm in a hospital. I'm in a hospital. I'm in a hospital. I'm in a hospital. I'm in a hospital. I'm in a hospital. I'm in a hospital. I'm in a hospital. I'm in a hospital. I'm in a hospital. I'm in a hospital. I'm in a hospital. I'm in a hospital. I'm in a hospital. I'm in a hospital. I'm in a hospital. I'm in a hospital. I'm in a hospital. I'm in a hospital. I'm in a hospital. I'm in a hospital. I'm in a hospital. I'm in a hospital. I'm in a hospital. I'm in a hospital. I'm in a hospital. I'm in a hospital. I'm in a hospital. I'm in a hospital. I'm in a hospital. I'm in a hospital. I'm in a hospital. I'm in a hospital. I'm in a the Laura's no somebody in Moscow. And it's like casually, it's like, oh, hey kids, your dad's not coming over tonight because his hospital was some strange mystery ailment and he has a blockage and hasn't pooped in seven days. Anyway, I got you some low-main. No, that was a weird thing because it was he hasn't pooped in 12 hours.

I was like, that was my favorite part of it is that they took Frank to the hospital because he wasn't pooping every two hours. Oh my God, his Frank's not pooped in more than two hours, take him to the hospital because he wasn't pooping every two hours. You know, like, oh my God, is Frank not pooped in more than two hours? Take him to the hospital immediately. So the Laura said it goes, takes a walk with her with dog and Larry. And the Laura's like, you know what? These dogs are so spoiled.

Dad, these are some spoiled dog. Look, look, they don't even bring their own soda on their walks. Can you believe it? Spoiled little dogs. So it's like, you seem happy to Laura, since she says, oh, yeah, that's the kind of the man I need. That's the kind of man I need back there. A man like you, dad, a man who takes care of me.

And my close with Frank, sure, I'm close with Frank. You know, does Frank bring his own coke? No. And that's just how it is. And Frank's got to see that, you know, and it's like, but you built all of this on your own to Laura's. You drove that bus on your own. I literally drove a bus. I did that. I was one of my jobs, actually. Yeah. Yeah. You know, because Frank, he's a very large man. Doesn't fit in a normal sedan. So that's how I originally met

Evan Goldstein. She's got like some weird background story. Like this year when she's like, yes, I did work for Bill Aiden. There, I did. You're cool, what? Yeah, yeah, I did. And I, you know, I did drive the bus because the bus driver had to go to the hospital.

He has a simple procedure. That's how I first met Evan Goldschneider. You know, things every husband has in a different way. You know, back when I owned a pizza company, cause I was in competition with food all the time. Like it's nice to finally know some, nice to know in a casual setting, you know. You know what, I just want Paul to know,

he's the number one man in my life, okay? And with this heart surgery coming up, it's very scary and the lary's like, well, I'll be honest with you Dolores, I'm not gonna be, I'm not gonna put the horse ahead of the car or whatever, or the bus, or the bus. Or the Coca-Cola. Or the Coca-Cola Dolores, but I like him.

Dad, what is he? Ah, come on Dad. A man, a real man, Dad. Very good, let's go back. So now we see Rachel and F and food at the batting cage. Humdingers. Excuse me. This batting cage place has a name, mascot Humdingers. That's a real Humdinger bill. Yeah, let's go to Humdingers. Hey, Rachel, you want to go to Humdingers? Oh, you know,

I'm a big Humdinger fat head. Let's do it. hum thing is, oh you know I'm a big hum thing if that had, let's do it. Um, so basically the guys all, they all gather because it's like date night and the guys are just, now you see why everybody don't, Dolores knows this in the hospital, okay. Frank's like, all right, let's get some chicken wings on my tanner skin, some deep fried tater skins with chicken wings on top of those. I'll have a green apple martini with the dollop of mayonnaise on that when you can get that. Yeah, Dolores. Dolores, well Dolores isn't here, but if you were here, I'd get her the Hummington or Burger.

The Hum, Hum, Hum Burger. Is that what that's called? Okay, I have one of those Hummington. Oh, can I have the Hummington or Tuna Tartar too? Please, thank you very much. I started talking about this game coming up. I'm friends like, this might be the first time, Pooley and I had the same place. And most is like, yeah, you know, I think this guy is, uh, you know, it's different

than the other guys that Dolores dates. You know, this guy's not going to be warm like David, okay? And then we see a clip of David taking care of Frank after he got captain. And he is for not finishing whatever he got captain, and he's for not finishing whatever construction money he borrowed money for the mob for allegedly by me. That was like an original allegation from me. And David being so nice to him and stuff.

And David's like, yeah, it was real nice giving you a shower earlier. And Frank's like, yeah, well, it's another thing when you grab my balls. And then Joe Gorgas was like, you know, when she was with David, like, he didn't give it the time of the day. And like, you were always there for her. Okay. And now she's got Paulie. And Paulie's always around, you know? And Melissa's like, yeah, because she's got a man with her now.

A man. So that's this conversation. You know? with her now. A man. So that's this conversation. You know about that. Yeah, and she was like, yeah, well, let me tell you the difference. You know, no, she don't give Frank the time of day and Frank's like, yeah, it's a fucking all family dynamic.

You did that when you cheated on her multiple times. You fucking idiot. And he's like, I've always considered myself a good father, but I wasn't a good husband. And I regret that every day. I mean, that's my Frank But you being a good husband is part of being a good father, okay? And you're not entitled to you're not entitled to a position you gave up decades ago with your couch breaking and boardwalk hooker Dalyances, okay? You don't get to complain about that still Frank and you don't get to cry on camera and try and get more girls Write to go on DMs being like oh you poor thing. Oh, can I help you?

Come here come to mama But I love Dolores, okay, I love it and she knows it. I said all the eyeless look look my this long Island medium girls that I brought along with me She knows okay, she knows I say it all the time. The Lord is most important people of my life I don't even have to say it because she already can see it in my head. Okay. She is the lung island medium origin story. I know. She's like definitely the hair origin story

at the very least. I mean, like, she's allegedly 31 or 32 and she's like that hair. That hair is like, it just, it looks like the matter horn at Disney. It's crazy. So then Frank tells us, you know, we worked hard the way we are today And it wasn't easy. So Paul comes around and Dolores and I probably are the furthest we've ever been from one another in years

At least at least since I cheated on her with about 45 different women. I don't know. It's crazy And Melissa's like, yeah, you might have to back off this one. I don't think you're gonna win this one and Like yeah, you might have to back off this one. And I don't think you're gonna win this one. And Franco's babe, babe, should we set dynamics, huh? Should we set a dynamic side, Brittany? And Brittany's like, I'm used to it. Of course, you know, once you're around it, you understand there's nothing to be worried about, all right?

And food is like, do you think the polls insecure? And he's like, oh yeah, yeah, you wanna see, you think it's secure now Wait, at least he's me place off. Oh So then they start there are the baddie cages and they're swinging no one can hit a ball except Joe Gorga and Melissa's like oh my god like no be careful. It's gonna break my 17 nose jobs. Hey babe Margaret says I could have a ball player. So let's, let's see what I'm missing, babe. Come on, babe.

Melissa can't let anything go. I mean, all she says are references to storylines or other people's lines. Like my 17 knows jobs, babe. Oh, Margaret said I could have dated a ball player. Melissa is obsessed. So, um, the first time I've hear about this, what's going on? Huh? What's going on with the ball play? So Melissa's like, oh Jennifer, she keeps trying to throw in my face that Margaret teases. Like, oh Melissa could be with a ball player, you know? And basically she's just like taking something Margaret says way out of context and make us all turn on Margaret. Yeah, I'm sorry I'm looking for some lip stuff. Deloitte, with lip stuff, with lip stuff for law.

With my lip stuff for law, with my bright yellow bag. I'm not here typical. So yeah, um, Rachel is, uh, Melissa's like, yeah, you know, obviously Jen has her plan for a revenge tour and I'm not biting. And Rachel's like, well, I was with Jen and tree and they gave me warnings about being friends with Marge. Trey said Marge is a better friend than an enemy. And Melissa's like, see, now I know fake when I see it.

And then I buy it and I mark it up and I sell it in, you know, I sell it in it. To all the people that I sell it is real. Yeah, I sell it is real in my store, you know? And I knew her going up to Marge was fake because she hates March. She was, and she doesn't care about what she doesn't care what you say, or what you say, or what Theresa says.

I don't care what anyone says. Okay, I don't care what like what Louis says. Okay, they, she hates them. And Melissa says, I see Louis for who he is. He's charming, but he's manipulating. And it's obvious that Louis told her be good to Margaret because don't fuck with Margaret because we're gonna need Margaret

to stop telling the truth about us. That's what I believe. Yeah Margaret, because don't fuck with Margaret, because we're gonna need Margaret and stop telling the truth to badass. That's what I believe. Yeah, which I don't disagree with, by the way. Yeah, I don't disagree with that either. Also, it's not a dumb move. It's a very smart move. It's like, don't keep coming after somebody. He knows everything that they can use against you.

That's a bunch of stuff that can use against you. So, Melissa's like, she hates Margaret, she hates Joe, and she hates me. So I'm gonna need this fake parade that's been rolling by to come to a stop, okay? And Rachel, she goes, is that all she said? Give me more, give me more. And Rachel said, well, she said to proceed with question,

that's all. And then Rachel tells us, I didn't ask there opinions about nothing, and I ain't afraid of nobody So that I know that was like a weird twist from Rachel I thought because they're like sort of you know Melissa's talking about this Like the situation in Jennifer and then Rachel just throws big fuel on the fire She just repeats what was said at this at this Barbie party and so it gets them all and it's his the end

She shares it like like oh my God you guys I didn't know what else is crazy like I'm in this with you and then they react to it goes whoa um I didn't ask for their opinions on this and they're not gonna sway me. I said well then why did you like share it like it was like Like it was dish for all of you guys, you know Oh, I was taking it as she was talking about Teresa and Jen. She's like, I didn't ask their opinions and I'm not afraid of anybody. Oh, but that would make much more sense because my version was like, why are you like saying,

hey, hey, like I got this scoop and then being like all upset at them for reacting to this scoop? No, I think that Rachel has chosen team Melissa and Marge and Danielle has chosen team Theresa and Jan. That's what it looks like from this episode. Very much. Well, definitely Danielle has for sure. Hi, I'm Michael Patrick King, host of the official Max Companion podcast, and just like that, the writers room.

Each episode members of the writers room and I unpacked moments from season 2, sharing juicy details you can only hear from us. Stream and just like that season 2 is starting June 22nd on Max, and listen to end just like that, the writers room on Max or wherever you get your podcasts. Yeah, so Melissa's like, let me enlighten you that trying to ice-modge out. Oh, you really? Wow, good, deep Melissa, you know?

I'm sure she can't tell. And Rachel's like, I don't give a flying shit and I have a very good judge character. Yeah, so I'm not gonna be, I'm not gonna be influenced. I'm just not. So that was the guy that I was like, are you worried that Melissa's trying to turn you against someone when you were the one who brought the information that got them all in a dizzy?

Oh yeah, that's a good asshaw saying. I'm a good judge of character. Like I know that Melissa's not what they're saying because I'm a judge of who knows. So Rachel's like, do you think Trees gonna be mad? And Melissa's like, I don't give a fly and fuck what Trees to thinks mad? And Melissa's like, I don't give a flying fuck what Trees to thinks. Yeah, Melissa's on one.

So now it's time to go to Brooklyn to my monodies, Pock. So Dolores is walking to the locker rooms. There's a big fundraiser thing. She just wants it to be bigger and better than last year. She's gonna be selling the sexy husband calendar at the game to help the fund raising and everything and people are showing up into the locker room and looking at the calendar Marge and Jo be show up Marge is like I'm here. I'm here. Look. I'm already holding a baseball I wasn't even supposed to be doing this with my hand. It's like it's like it just wants to be part of the game. I'm sorry

I can't help it. I'd have surgery. Could you believe it guys? I'm on drugs like Jennifer. So I'm all right. I'm all right I'm fine. Lisa not to shuffled. Yeah, so Danielle's like, how do you think everything's gonna go the day? And she's out fine because I'm not gonna you know I'm not gonna sit here to chair at the event and argue and Danielle goes, yeah, that was a 10 That was a 10 and you know, unfortunately, it was such a nice brunch It was such a nice brunch to It was such a nice brunch too. Like, who, Daniel, shut up. Who are you?

And now, are you gonna come for a March 4 Theresa right now? Bad move. You know what? The thing with me is if I have a fight with someone, even if it's a disheveled drug addict. Okay, if I make up with them, I think we're definitely made up. But like, this is just crazy. She did things to unravel it. She told Melissa I was trying to break up a marriage.

Melissa knows exactly what I said to her. I told Melissa, stop feeling bad. You're so gorgeous. You can go with any ball player you want. You can have a dowel straw barrier, dark good end or Gary Cone or Mookie, Mookie Blade lock. Really anyone you could ever want from the 86 Mets.

I'm doing me all the way. Well, someone said that to me. I would be, I would be like, I would take it as you're saying that we don't, what we have is a special. I don't like, you know what, don't tell me that shit. Don't tell me because like, you know, me think. I just, I don't know what I'm talking about.

If you want to, if you want to, if you want to, you're just like, if you want to build me up, say my boobs are perky for the day. Don't come and tell me I should be married to someone else. I'm like, okay, congratulations. You're as big of an idiot as Theresa. Congratulations. Like, I have not what she was saying at all.

Like, it's literally not. She wasn't saying, go marry a baseball player. And the fact that Danielle is still taking it that way, even when it's being explained, she's a dumb dumb. She's a dumb dumb. And you can tell she's just here for Theresa because she's even copying the storyline of like, my brother and I don't speak and it's his wife's fault.

You know? So then Marge is like, this girl's crazy. I'm telling you. So Rachel and Fessler come and she's like, oh, we're talking about the gent fight because she said horrible things, okay? And Danielle's like, you know, I'm friends with Jens. So it's very hard for me to hear things about her and her and Teresa would just sell clothes, you know, I'm friends with Jen, so it's very hard for me to hear things about her and Theresa would just sound close, you know?

You just got here. You've been here for five minutes and now all of a sudden you're like, I'm just so close with Jennifer Eden. I'm so excited to see your house for the first time. I'm just like, so why are you bringing up tree? I mean me and tree are fine too unless she's bitching about something now What what's going on with that? She goes well, you know, they're my friends. So she just said keep your eyes open That's all she said about it. Oh fuck crying out loud You know you know you know you're she said you have a better friend than an enemy Like she's talking to me sir. Okay, look. She's talking specifically. It's a little baby with the voice of Bruce Willis. Okay, that's what I'm talking about. That's what that's what Jesus mindsets like right now. Why do I see Teresa's face, but here Roseanne bars voice.

Why? Look who's talking. Okay. I mean, get the worst enemy known to man. Well, that's pretty big. That's she just elevated Teresa to be the worst. The worst. The worst.

And Teresa is in enemy that you do not want to have. And so she's like, I was never even mean to Teresa. I don't know what this is coming from. And Rachel's like, yeah, and they were also saying that she swayed people's decisions. And Danielle's like, yeah, and you guys obviously have a lot of history, but I don't want to go into a friendship that could you're gonna like Come after me at some point, you know, and then Danielle says has the nerve to say I can't possibly wrap my head around to human wanting to Dig up things in my past to destroy me

But my god always tells me to listen to my friends and they obviously have been done dirty I'm like you are you are sticking up for Jennifer Aiden. This is what she does. Margaret basically did it once. Margaret did it once and it was like it worked out pretty badly for Margaret. A lot of the audience turned against her. Jennifer does this every single season and she's like, oh I can't you know I don't know if I could be friends with Margaret because she digs up people. She digs up things about people. It's like oh you're an idiot. Yeah I just thought, love why the viciousness comes out straight out the gate. That's what I don't get. I's like, oh, you're an idiot. Yeah, I just felt low. Why the viciousness comes out straight out the gate. That's what I don't get. I'm like, shut up. This is none of your business. And

you're all the wrong team. And you're starting all of this with March right now. And Marge is not biting. I like the Marge is arguing with her, but just being like, listen, you don't understand stupid. Okay, have fun being stupid, dumb face. Okay. So if you do something stupid to me, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say what, you're gonna be fucking crazy. And so Danielle's just like,

I don't know who this woman is and Margaret's like, you know, she says, she says at this point, she's like obviously suffering very bad, she's badly Jennifer. And that's, that is what it is. She's suffering, dishevelled, drug addict. I can't help her anymore.

And I's like, we made it! Ha, the ballet! Ha! Take it off to the ballroom, the ballroom, something thin and scratch! Well, hello, Bill. You doing good.

Hi, Jennifer! And Jennifer just ignores her and builds this weird opportunity! Am I just, yes, charity behavior. Call it a day. It's a day of charity behavior. That's what we're doing. Hi, Jen.

It's just like, I'm going to do whenever I can to make this charity event harmonious. Sorry, I'm at harmonious. Harmonious, sounds bad. It would be just screaming and yelling at everyone, just like coming home, it was an event. Hi. So Joey, little Joey, is talking to Teresa. be just screaming and yelling at everyone just like coming or is that an event? So Joey, little Joey is talking to Teresa and Joe comes and takes him away from Teresa.

So it's like, come on over here. And he tells us, I gotta keep my distance from tree because tree can go from zero to a hundred immediately and then I gotta defend myself. You know, I don't want to have to do that. I want to have to do that. Yeah. And then the cousins are like hugging because they have like not seen each other in like months. And there's like awkward, basically what happens is

Joe and Teresa, they sort of have this awkward like, hi, and like kisses on the cheeks. And then everyone, like they pull out this, the calendar, the charity calendar. And everyone just stares at the calendar and jokes about the calendars that we don't have to look at each other and talk to each other.

They just all are just staring at it like, look at that, look at that. Yeah, look at that. That's pretty good. Hey, yeah, come look at Louis. Looking at you new step, Dad. He sure does. Yeah, come look at, yeah, come look at over here.

It's like this weird, like, like this way we can act like we're all doing something together without interacting with each other whatsoever. It's like sweet family time looking at the stripper calendar. I know. So she's like this is the Joe and I in line like this is the way all we should be especially when we're around our children's. So then we go to play some ball and it's like baseball baseball and then Melissa's like I wonder if my new ball player would hit like that. God, Melissa, you just fucking try hard, dude.

It's like your 10th year. So, yeah, we're just watching more baseball and more baseball. Jennifer Aiden's like, last year, we had a professional athlete on our team. Now, who do we have? Joe Colgah? I don't know if he's tall enough to catch the ball, baby! Bada, bada, bada, bada, bada, roppies! And then, Danielle is really good at it, and she's like,

Don't let the hairs in the nails fool's ya, cause I can get down. I grow up at the neighborhood with all boys. I can play everything. Football, Swap, Football, Baseball, Soccer, you know, I Whatever give it to me and then they show her as a little girl someone's video taping her and they go hey, give me a name I So then, um, uh, Jennifer... Yeah, but something like that. She's like chopping gum, getting ready to throw the softball. So Rachel and Jennifer are talking and Rachel's like,

so Jennifer, so I was last week, my heart broke, because I was talking to Olivia and she said, she want, when she grows up, she wants to be a therapist for love. And Jennifer's like, oh no! Before she wants to be a Broadway star, she wants to be on stage, she wants to be famous, and now she wants to have a career where she helps people. It's so sad, it's so sad. Margaret ruined my child's Broadway career.

She wants to go down a path with rejection and sadness and who knows what sort of personal damage you can take on and now she just wants to be a frumpy, highly educated person. Yeah and Jen's like this is why I never spoke about this infidelity but this reason right here. Why would I want them to know about our trauma? Every time we fight Olivia will come in and say, remember, you love each other, mama, you love each other. Jesus Christ. Superstar. But by the way, I think that's so sweet that when you're fighting, your kid comes in and says, remember that you love each other. And I don't think that your husband has to have cheated for your kid's not to like hearing you fight.

Yeah. Yeah. She's never fighting before. Should come in and do monologues from Shakespeare. No, she won't. Because she wallsed a girl to the stage, baby. We used to fight and live you would come in and sing. We're gonna score tonight

and then I haha oh one time I kicked a bill out of the house and Olivia stood at the front door singing starlight express starlight express how you real? Yeah, so no.

Oh, when Bill and I began to have a bad fight I'd leave you with just going to the garage and stand on a tire and say, niff me up! Tint, I'm a grizzabella, take me to the next plane! So, um, what's your attack? I'm not gonna get over this sad easily. So now she has another reason to be mad, hit March. And so, um, everyone's asking about Polly and Delores.

It's like, he's sick. He had heart surgery. He has a short circuit in his heart. I'm telling you, that Steve Gutenberg is literally in every thing. Well, Johnny V is is his ventricle. Yeah, Frank, that's exactly right. So Joe, um, Joe B is like, uh, oh, Joe Benino is like, well, you know what, you got to pass if you have surgery and Gorgo's like, yeah, he's like, yeah, but look at this guy. Look at Frank.

He said, look at him. He's crying and everything. He looked at him. He's never so he's crestfallen and lors like well You know what it's a little transition, but that's all it is It's like when I transition to having a big butt and I became more comfortable with falling over in the shower It's just a little adjustment period Yeah, and Frank's like, but I've all these years we've been together. You can't just like Pretend it happened. I thought it cried the other day the Lord. I thought it cried, you know and the up, you can't just like, remember that it never happened. I thought it crying the other day, the Lord.

I thought it cried, you know. And the Lord says, yeah, but now Frank, we got to worry about how poorly feels. You know, do you understand that? And Frank's like, ah, ah, ah. And Marge is like, I could cry. Frank looks, oh my God, my arm is dabbing my face like the tears away.

I'm not crying on. I don't know why it's doing that. I could learn a thing or two from Johnny Five at this point to be frank. So then Dolores is like, no Frank doesn't like change. And not one thing in our life when we got divorced changed except being intimate. And then at a certain point he had to share a room with a chinchilla, which was awkward. But you can make me feel guilty for being in a relationship that I now deserve. Fucking knock it off, You can't do that.

So Teresa, over to another part of the barriot, calls little Joey of our thing. Joey. Hey, darling, did you like this? Yes. Huh? No, it's natural. Like my girls. Damn, I'm learning. I look at hands like two. I look at this.

Always has my hands like Joey. Look at my hands like your hands. See, I'm a man here, I look at his, my two, my two, my two, his, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, two, my two, my two, my two, two, my two, two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, two, my two, my two, my two, my two, my two, two, my two, two, my two, two, my two, my two, my two, my two, two, my two, two, my two, two and my Zia Melissa trying to put a wedge in between us. And that's definitely a feeling that doesn't sit well with me. Like, you've got a driver's license. You're 21, 22 at this point. Yeah. And you're part of the problem at this point, Gia. Yeah, I think the cousins that go out to a burger, you know, yeah. I think Gia is part of the problem at this point.

So Joe, you know, it's how you're raised. How can you not, you know, when all your parents do or shit talking each other? So Joe, of course, is like, Joe, let's go. Get away from them. Get away from them. I know. Joe's not helping the case either. So the game ends, they raise like $200,000, lorses, like, you know, there was some bumps

in the road, but enough about Frank's back. Some tears. And you know, we raised some money. It was great news. So now our second therapy scene of the episode, which takes place in a giant Victorian house. It's a little haunted. Yeah, real weird house. It's like up in Queens or something.

I'm not sure where, but it reminds me of like one of those houses. Everything's like woodpaneling, you know? There's like wall phones everywhere and like those desks that roll down, you know? It's a very old person's house. And this lady, I was like, okay, this is an actual therapist. And probably like, you know, garage sale have her. She looks like someone who has a garage sale every week. Maybe a baby collector? Maybe a dog to chew. Yes, possibly. Dr. Judy played by Carol Ratzewal out of plan.

Ha ha ha ha ha. Poor Dr. Judy. Dr. Judy has a big, she, the first time I feel like I've seen a wig with split ends, but she has it. So, she, so Bill and Jennifer show up and they, they sit down in the waiting room and Bill's like, well, this is an unfortunate reality. And Jen's talking about how Bill has been like really against therapy because he'd rather just like just be quiet and like a good marriage to him is when they don't talk about anything. Yeah, but then I told him

that Olivia wants to be a love therapist, and he had nothing to say but to sit there and shame, and finally he said, but what about cats? And I said, this is your fault. And then he looked at me even longer and then he finally said, you realize there's no such thing as love therapist, right? And I said, quiet, baby, this is my storyline. And then Jen tells him endless in belt. If you have concerns about me, I want to do, I want to know them. I mean, if I do things that bother you, you got to tell me, baby.

My cat writes, cut to hurt completely shooting him down if he says one single critical thing of her. Exactly. So then they finally go into their session, judiasing and an enormous chair. She's like slouching this huge chair. She's like, so tell me what brings you here. And Jen's like, okay, well, just off the top, my mind.

That's basically 11 years ago I was pregnant pretty with that fourth child, and then Bill cheered with me, and I didn't turn anybody, and it was like, if that's ever never happened, and that was like my process. But there was another woman, and they found out about the incident, and she prodded up, and now I had the process, and everybody didn't do my kids. We're gonna find out about this. I don't know, just something. That's what comes to my mind.

I love that Jen is there to just save some money. She's like, I'm not even gonna let this lady dig. This is everything right now, here it is. And so the doctor's like, so how did they find out about it? She was, well, built over the old descent and I told Gabriela, but my daughter Olivia saw it on TikTok.

So she not even heard the news today. We're getting into the way the bill was cheating on me. She heard it with an on dance It was the billed and dance challenge Someone Someone made a scallion pancake on Tik Tok and they made it in the shape of billed and cheated on his wife She ended up learning the new slime on TikTok called G-Daddy's a cheetah.

So, Jen tells us that Olivia, when she found out, Olivia just looked at her and said, Mama, to all men cheat, and flicker hair. And I said, you know what, baby? Pit-bar-mac, mistakes. How do you think what baby? Bit by, man, mistakes. How do you think you came into this world, sweetheart? So Judy is like, so uh, she is like, you're so you're concerned about the effect on the kids and just like, yes, it's come to my attention.

So my daughter, Olivia, wants to be a disgusting, haggard therapist. Could you imagine something as terrible as that? She wants to be a therapist, what a just horrific embarrassing, modifying, adventurous. And she's like, yeah, in the shears of Spic, or in she says kiss each other,

kiss each other. She's like, maybe you should stop, maybe we should move this conversation over to stop screaming and yelling at each other in front of your children. Maybe that's where this conversation over to stop screaming and yelling at each other in front of your children. Maybe that's where this conversation needs to go. That's, does that do? I think you're traumatizing your children at this point,

just hearing from your own tail. I think you're both traumatizing your children. Stop screaming in front of your children. So, Judy's like, well, because you think it means this affected her a lot. Oh yeah, she's like, yeah So Judy's like, well, because you think it means this affected her a lot. Oh yeah, she's like, yeah, she's like kids, kids. So Judy's like, well, she wants the security of knowing everything's okay.

And she's, you know, 10 years ago, you've forgotten for gave. And now she's, well, there's of course like a little bit of anger there because ultimately, if, if, if Bill didn't do this, the woman would have nothing to come to me with. I'm like, Oh, so you're angry. Not that bill was was disloyal to you that he cheated on you. You're angry that now someone can like come at you on a new job. Yeah, basically. But I think ultimately she's also mad that Bill just doesn't

have her back period. It's like he didn't have his back then. She was pregnant, he was cheating on her. Now fast forward all these years later, the news comes out and she's still the one to fight alone saying stop talking about it. It's not cool for you guys to keep talking about it while Bill literally hides in a bush and watches with a drink. I think it's like a general thing

of what the fuck, dude, you don't have my back. Now I get that, on the other hand, it's hard to have your back sometimes because you go at people in such a vicious, disgusting way that no mature person is gonna have your back. Like no solid thinking person can have your back. You act like a fucking net case, dude. Yeah, that's true.

So, now Dr. Judy asks Bill how he feels about all of it. And he's like, well, my relationship with the kids and their mom is the perfect person. She doesn't push him too much. She's over there at a good time. And dad... Support him, it's God being supportive now. And well, it's dad who's hard and awesome, pushes us, who's absolutely fabulous with his style, but also now that he's got

infidelity under his belt. Now I can't even push my kids to do all the things I want them to do anymore. It's actually hideous. Some kids need micro-management to achieve what they can achieve. And just like he wants me to do the micro-managing, everything going wrong is me. He wants me to be the enforcer, but about the child-to-parent ratio here. Where five? Where one against five? Because there's only one participate in parent. And the doctor I love Dr. Judy. She's like, you're not participating. Come on, come on, Bill.

How are you not participating? Come on, now, Bill. And I think, yeah, he has to put it all on my shoulders where I keep telling him and I feel like I'm your employee. And now you're coming in, say, I don't like the job you did, okay? And it's like, well, the problem is my job is 24 hours and 24 hours a day. Stress. That's what my job is. Sick, but here's the thing.

You come home and you go straight to the pool house for three hours. You only come in once we're done eating dinner. Okay, that's called massive avoidance. Yeah. Okay. And he should not be allowed to do that. I didn't know that he was doing that every night. That's fucking crazy. I think we all forgot what Bill was like the first season that the Aden's were on. The first season that Aden's were on, Bill was so controlling and he also seemed like he wanted a void gen at all costs.

And he was like a dick. And then somehow Bill has become this charming guy on the show. But I think the issues from their first season are still clearly there. Because I didn't realize that that he was just escaping to the pool house for three hours every day. At this point, just burn that pool house down because that pool house has been the source

of so much misery for Jen. And we've heard the pool house stuff before, but I didn't know he was in there every night Yeah, you know, so you know part of it is Bill has to speak up to I think his thing is like you know If I just stay quiet Even though I'm fucking annoyed as long as I don't tell her something that she's gonna go off about Would be safe. I don't mean physically safe But like just keep the peace at home

But he's gonna have to say something like there's there's obviously a reason that you're avoiding being at home And Jen seems like a huge pain in the ass So I'm sure he's avoiding that and raising five kids because that's got to be hell But yeah, he can't do that. I can't really ask her pain in the assness is probably directly related to him Yeah, exactly, you know exactly whether it's just like she's frustrated is probably directly related to him. Exactly. Exactly. Whether it's just like she's frustrated, she's hurt, or maybe she just wants to have a voice because she feels like he's not paying attention or something.

So Dr. Judy has a pretty clear observation because Bill is very silent. Do you notice about your husband? He's silent. He's a quiet man. Yeah. So yes, because then Jen's like, yeah, he's always silent. And when I dealt with the infidelity, he's silent.

When I told him I'm gonna forgive him, he's silent. This is our life, Judy. She's like, this is our life, Judy. We put it under the rug and he's gotten to the point where I'm getting fed up. And Bill's just like, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, like he laughs. And she's like like I'm not just supporting it here. I'm your partner And I need my partner to meet me halfway. It's 20 years of him having a wife that never had to complain So why is it so hard to expect a little and return?

And the doctor because what I'm hearing is she doesn't feel appreciated for her efforts But I'm also hearing that she feels lonely and from Bill. I'm hearing is she doesn't feel appreciated for her efforts, but I'm also hearing that she feels lonely. And from Bill, I'm hearing not even fucking crickets, at least crickets make a noise. I mean, what is this man? Does this man need to be charged? What's wrong with this man? And Bill's like, well, I guess you do have a point. And she goes, and I have something very important to say now. This is gonna be something at the crux of your issues. And my suggestion is that we make another appointment and I'll tell you about it then.

Sorry, the oldest gambit in the world, therapist wins, therapist wins. And Bill just goes, great. In the middle. I see how this works, you're just going to string us along. Yep. That's how it is. So good luck, you crazy kids.

Yep. And that was the end of the episode. So thanks everyone for watching, listening and watching, and we'll be back later this week with all our usual recaps. So stay tuned. And we'll catch you on the next one. Bye everyone. Bye! Watch what crap ends with like to think it's premium sponsors. Ain't no thing like Allison King. Ashley Savoni, she don't take no baloney. She's not just a

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