Watch What Crappens - RHONJ: Everybody Nose - Live From Atlanta

Episode Date: February 4, 2022

The Real Housewives of New Jersey are back, and we're kicking off the premiere with a live show in Atlanta. There's so much to discuss: Luis's crazy video, Jennifer new nose, Marge's accusations, Tiki Barber, Joe Gorga's standup. It's gonna be a good season! Thanks Georgia!Get tix to our live shows: https://www.watchwhatcrappens.com/10th-anniversary-hunky-dory-tour/See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Get ready for a double load of Queen of Hearts! It's me, Jujubee, and I return to guide sexy singles through some ronchy blind dates. Cameras off! Voice only! Launching during Pride! Queen of Hearts takes Miami by storm, with Daeders' Cuppe from Tampa Bayes, Just Chaz, and Brittany Brave to name a few. Follow Queen of Hearts on Amazon Music,

or wherever you get your podcasts. Good bye, Carl! Watch what crap pins, Watch what happens, watch what happens, The kids want happy and fun, They're so much that happens Happy and happy, Happy and happy, Happy and happy,

Happy and happy, Watch what happens, Actually, The kids want happy and happy, So happy and happy, I'm so glad that you're here. I'm glad you're here. I'm glad you're here. I'm glad you're here. I'm glad you're here. And baby, hubbubble!

Yes. Yes. Yes. Hello, Atlanta. Atlanta. Hi, baby gorgeous. Hi, baby gorgeous. Lisa, I'm part was an amazing party time!

You guys, you're just in time for the reveal of my new plastic surgery. It's good, right? I got it done in Turkmenistan. I had a tid on my chin earlier, but I tried to get it kind of deflated. Now I've got like no well as under boob is my. You guys, welcome to Watch or Crappens. A podcast about all that crap on Bravo we just love to talk about. We are so excited to see you and so excited to be back here.

We love Atlanta. We love Atlanta. We love Atlanta. We love Atlanta. Also, what an amazing night to be here. I mean, Jersey premiere. Jersey premiere. Wow, you guys were amp tonight. This is amazing.

This is gonna be a good show. You guys were all singing along before. I was like, Ronnie was like, oh, this can be a good one tonight. I was like, I concur. And so much about plastic surgery, right? And like, Ronnie was like, oh, this is gonna be a good one tonight. I was like, I concur. And so much about plastic surgery, right? And like everything's about plastic surgery. Do I have toilet paper? I have toilet paper in my hair.

I actually do, I have to do. I thought I was phantom toilet paper, but it's real. It's a real toilet paper. Like toilet paper is a fairly recent, oh, also sorry trees. Those are a lot of toilet paper, but. Toilet paper is a fairly recent oh also sorry trees. There's a lot of toilet paper, but toilet paper is a fairly recent thing people just I don't know what they wiped with before but I watch a lot of Westerns and they just always gross me out because I know they didn't have toilet paper

Yeah, it's bothered that's hard to watch it So I always think about when I see a Western Don't you like game of thrones I wouldn't watch for the longest time because they just look so dirty I'm like they don't have the odor in No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, other day. Okay. Okay. And apparently, I don't know if her face was all swollen or whatever. I don't know. I love that we're all watching Bravo and we're so judgmental about. What the fuck do you think you've been watching? You know? It's always been crazy.

The new Real Housewives Berkshire's thing, everyone's like, oh my god, Taylor's the only one who looks natural. I'm like, well my god, Taylor's the only one who looks natural. I'm like, well, yeah. Post-circle. I never was a conversation. A lot of way or another if I had a filler. Yeah. So she came out with, she came out with a post somewhere I don't know, but she's like, guys, I have a swollen face.

I'm a fungi, I'm a human being. All you have to do is check my nails, get them, and all the funnest is more. It's like how much salt did you eat? I'm sick of the injections that are flexions and not jaws. A lot of plastic surgery. And you know, Jen, from tonight's show, Jen Westerbunds came out with a big, long one, because you know, of course, everyone's like, no one's like, all port they, everyone's

like, what the fuck did you do to your face? Yeah. The fuck you're wrong with you. Look at this ghost thing. So she came out with an Instagram, she's like, guess what? Sorry, but I just had it. And it's like this long. It's like 10 pages long.

I was like, that is so sweet. Cannot wait to make fun of your ass. Yeah. Jennifer is apparently already gotten rid of her chin. I don't know if you guys, this was actually on the, this is like a wolf on it. It was like a news flash from Bravo itself. Like guess what Jennifer looks like without her chin?

I'm like, we know, we saw her for like four seasons. But she's like, yeah baby, I just couldn't get used to the chin, baby. What's the big potato head are you that you can just be like, you know what, I don't like my chin. Taken it off for the day. Like it's not a Paschant, it's your fucking, it's a body part.

Yeah, I support her getting rid of the chin. I don't think it was, I don't think it was a great artistic choice. This is my face. What's wrong? Oh. The fucking iPad, it's like, I need to see your face. This is my face.

The same face you see every day. It's like you're not even recognized. All right. I don't even know who you are right now. You just made it sound like Carl for a second. Oh, you look repot. Oh. But I'm going to just get in your face just

to make sure it's you. Whatever it was. I need to see your face before you look at your phone. So show me your face. you look at your phone. Show me your face. Show me a better face. Better. Come on.

Smile for me. Smile for me. Put your face weight on me. Oh, yeah. Listen, I want to unlock this iPad, but I'm also trying to take it slow. Totally changed. It's like the software update. Totally changed. It's like the software update. Totally changed.

You want to install me right now or later tonight? I can schedule out for later tonight. You look great by the way. By the way, before you log in on your device, you're just going to know, I make my bed now, so. Software update notes added by the way to celebrate. You know this, just you know this website accepts cookies, so do you cool cookies? How many cookies have you made me? It's like another operating system but in.

Are you okay with cookies? This is the one we've been asking for. Let's eat. Kyle! Just like when you walk away from the iPad, the iPad just starts going, That's your scream saver when you just leave the computer on too long.

Kyle! Kyle! Kyle, when are you going to wake me up? So what's happening? Also celebrity big brother started. Okay, so they tell us. Did you guys watch it? Did anyone watch it?

Did anyone watch celebrity big brother? So they tell us, you know, they're guessing like who's gonna be on celebrity big brother from housewives and everyone's like, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, meilees, Erica Jane. It's Cynthia and Hi, I'm Teddy. Ha ha ha ha. What kind of rip off is that? So we were in a hotel last night, we both

used the YouTube TV and they ain't paying a shit. So I don't care if you use it or not. But I turned it on, and since it's a local station, it was like, you cannot watch this till it's like done recording or whatever. So I was reading the description. And it was like, you know, Cynthia Bailey, Hi, and then it just turned off. It was like, recording or whatever. So I was reading the description. And it was like, you know, Cynthia Bailey, Haimte, and then it just turned off.

It was like, he's awesome. You two TV was like, I'm too tired. No, no. And Teddy was like, you know, I really enjoyed my time on Beverly Hills, but like some people like to talk behind your backs. I like to say it to their face. Like, whatever, Teddy, come on.

Good luck on Big Brother. Yeah. Yeah, I'd say everything set their face. Like, whatever Teddy, come on. Good luck on Big Brother. Yeah. Yeah. I'd say everything to their faces. We're evicting you. It's Lisa Vanderpump. Lisa Vanderpump is evicting you. Oh my darling. Darling. Darling.

And we will start a recap. But can Vanderpump say, Well, my wife is never getting on a horse again I'll tell you that much never then my wife is never getting on a gold dem whole The horses are celebrating like finally Lisa did not approve that message. She'll be a cow dare you She'll be on like a swinging horse on a sandalian side of a bigger sandalian. Inside of a bigger sandalian. Alright, let's get to the real house of the show.

The real house of the show. So the episode opens up. So they start the episode with the trailer. And we already recap the trailer, but I do have to say, I still amused me because you see a shot of the George Washington bridge. And then there's this like, Billy Isleish kind of music. It's like a Phobilly Isleish cover of Cruel Summer. It's like, it's a cruel, cruel, cruel summer.

And then obviously, just here at Doloresco, don't talk in my face. I wish they did do Jersey in the style of Cruel Summer the TV show, you know? But like Teresa just starts miserable in a bad wig, you know? She's like, here's my memories of the Cruel Summer. Blink, blink, blink, blink. You know, like, what happened? What happened to get Teresa into that bad wig?

And then you have to wait the whole season to find out. Thank you for your form. into that bad wig. And then you have to wait the whole season to find out. Thank you for your form. There's a really big cruel summer fan in the front row. And everyone else is like, what the fuck are you talking about? Bravo is already full of hags and bad wigs. All right, so after this trailer, I have my boobs. Like, just there's luscious.

I don't know. I feel luscious. I'm feeling them today. I'm feeling them today. I'm feeling them today. Literally. So then we do start with like another shot. They love showing the George Washington bridge on this show.

He must be proud, by the way. George Washington, I've been having like, the fuck did I do? They make me a bridge and it becomes the one architectural feature they profile on the real house on New Jersey. Every single episode is like, oh, in the George Washington bridge. So we're in Montclair, we see Montclair and Tena Flau in all these locations, and then it, then we land on Jennifer, and has like the Lynn Curtain kind of like

a-sbandage around her head. You all know Lynn Curtain's based bandage, right? But it's also a good call back to Siggie Flicker because member wins Siggie Flicker. Oh, it's a hot one, dude! Joseph Campanella! Like she started her entire housewives' journey you know, in a face bandage, members. You want some soup? You want some soup to me, sir?

Let's hear what the soup in a straw. Yes, and Jennifer, you're going down the SIGGI path. Not a good path to go down, Jennifer. No, no, no. You guys got serious, you're like... That's what it looks like. SIGGI hurts your fucking feelings, huh? Because like, out.

Siggie. So, so Jennifer's getting ready with her thing and her oldest daughter, Gabriella's there. And she's like, yes, she does. Gabriella's wonderful. These kids, you know, Gabriella, she got made fun of in school. We did not approve of it.

We continued to not approve of it. So we, we stand Gabriella. But she was like, Mom, that could be your Halloween costume. She goes, really? What would I go as? She's like someone who got botched. Oh.

Oh. Hey, snap that bad baby. I like the whatever she gets fixed. Her lower jaw still does that, and her tongue kinda like hangs on her bottom teeth. Oh, yeah. I'm a stop-fights, I finish fights. Bubba!

She really, I mean, it's a remarkable how much she really talks, like she's the wife of a mobster in the 20s. You're going out to play Crap's again? What's wrong with ya? How? And I mean, especially today, we all really feel bad for the kids. You know, after no one's what happens

at the end of this episode. Like, we all feel bad for kids. It's like a commercial where they're like the children of war. And you're like, okay, like, the war is bad, but I still want to send them colored pencils, you know? Like send me the address. So then we go over to Jackie's house, where her kids are running around.

A little Hudson, he's chasing around his sister. And Jackie's like, you guys are driving me crazy right now. And Hudson's like, but you won't give me back my grapes. The fuck kind of family is this? I know. I mean, George Washington Bridge is like, But you won't give me back my grapes! The fuck kind of family is this? No. I mean, George Washington Bridge is like, I thought this was fucking America. A grape fight.

I found in this country so kids could fight over a natural food. What is this? I know, it felt sad that they were fighting over grapes. As children, are there no chemicals in the house to fight over? This is what you're left with? Mastoral foods.

Yeah. Take your kids away. Man, we have a call that you're giving your children natural foods. Get in the van. Get in the van. Get in the nimbusco van. We're going to drive you.

So we got a Melissa's house. And Antonia who just gets more Antonia by the second, yes. I mean, I am Antonia. I was going to say, I was like Antonia. Who am I kidding? I'm an old Antonia. Okay. My Antonia.

That was a literary reference. Oh, it was a... It was a Wola-Cathar reference. Oh, thanks. It was touching. Thanks for being touching. For a second. Go for it. So she's just staring at little Joey

who has, of course, this hair, you know? And I also had this hair. I don't know. I'm coming like full circle to childhood this episode. But he has like the shaved sides and then like the poof. And she's like, oh my god, he looks like a grito. Why would you want a puff of, why would you want like just like a puff on the top of your head like that? And he goes, because it's sexy. It's sexy. Can't believe that's like Joe Gorgos' son. It's crazy. Yeah. He's like, it's sexy. Can't believe that's like Joe Gorgas' son. It's crazy.

Yeah. He's like, it's sexy. Some people complained about sidewalks until they don't got a sidewalk. And then they're walking on the ground. Follow me at Gorgas' malls. All right, follow me. And then we wind up at the main event we're at, Teresa's house where we just hear Melania go, mooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo Magic, blah! Can I just go eat by the porn? It's so nice, by the porn, amen.

It's like storming down rain. I know. No. We're gonna eat outside, it's so nice. She's so delusional. She's like trying to get them all to believe it's a beautiful day. I like it. Literally raining on my fucking head, OK?

And so who's OK? This is terrible. We've recapped all of these, but they're kids. Okay. It's Gia Yeah, who now talks like this? She talks like this. Yeah, it does the teenager like constantly getting a manicure hand Like she's like let me tell you you know we're hands are like that. Okay, so there's Gia Melania No, but in between is Gabriela. Oh, Gabriela. Gabriela is a silent. OK, Melania. And then now, the little one started like yapping. Oh, I see.

I don't mind. Did you catch it? Yes, I did, of course. I was so proud of her. I ruined my own, like three times. Hold on, I don't want to get it wrong. OK, I think it says the silent one here somewhere. OK, see you guys.

Ma, my hair's going to get francing, ma. It's like, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, talking about how, like, they're closing on their house. They're finally sold to house. We even got a flashback of Michelle from last season. I didn't even bother writing it down. I was just like, oh, there she is. And then, that's kind of like her life, right? There she is, huh? So then, so they're going to be moving out.

The house has been on the market for six months. And so Teresa and Louis are going gonna be moving in together guys. Yeah. And she is like, but my routine is not changing just because we're moving somewhere else. I love that teenager. Just like, fuck you, everything's fuck you. Do you want some fries with your dinner? I love drawing!

And then Gabriella, actually the more shocking thing is that Gabriella spoke this episode. Her one line for the year, okay, the 2022 line of the year, she's like, well I mean it's not going to change at all. I mean we're going to be living with two men for the first time in six years. And I'm out, I'm done. Yeah, and I'm done. Yeah, she actually spoke, and I was like, I think I've said that before. I haven't lived with the man in years.

It's like I'm a lot of karma with that kid, except for all the sports. And the thinnet, I mean a lot, there's a lot. So Teresa is like, When we got a sign, and then we got another sign, and I there's a lot. So Teresa is like, when we got a son and then we got another son and I was wanting a son. So now I got like, sons, but like not my sons, but they're like my son. Think, think, think, think, think.

What is she even? She got lost. Yeah. She got lost in her, in her family tree. Her sons and daughters, ha, ha. She likes needs like, she needs to go to Wikipedia to understand the Brady bunch. She's like, wait, what?

Three sons and three daughters in a housekeeper, ha, can you say it again? So she's like, it's kind of been crazy now that I got a son's and she's like, it's kind of been crazy now that I got a son's and she's like, mom. You would just like thing up naked in the backyard yesterday. You can't do that anymore. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. I walked into my mom's, you know how, it's like, stand in my bathroom.

It's the one time I get to be by myself. That's my mom. But we would like pick the lock and be like, come on, wait in your bathroom. I went in there one time, saw that shower. And I don't need that. I don't need that in my backyard. It's still in my head.

It is still in my head. I still can't use Lufa's. I feel like if I went out there, it'd be like seeing like a large open-faced cheeseburger or something just lying out there, it would be like seeing like a large open-faced cheeseburger or something just lying out there. Wow. What are you looking at? So many conflicting feelings. I'm like, oh, I'm starving. That's free-chan. Yeah. Chetta. So she's like, yeah, I'm all me, I'm all the dude, I know, I'm all the... And the normal ones like, oh my god'm all me, I'm all the dude, I know more.

And the normal one's like, oh my God, it's not the end of the world. I know. I'm not even in this family. Gabriella. Teresa's like, are you okay with us blending our families? And you know, Melania was terrified. She thought she was going to be put into like a blender or something like that. Mom!

I'm so young. So she's like, you know, I really was nervous when I met Lulee. You know, we really took that week to get to know each other. And yeah. Who are you talking about? You took time to get to know each other. You literally walked up to him coming out of his doorway

on the shore. And now you're going to move in with him. It was like two seconds. No, no, no, Ronnie. Excuse me, this is true love. And we know this because we then see a flashback of the two of them getting some sort of like spa tree, man. They're lying side by side.

Like, she's like, I went down. I have lashes on. He goes, I have lashes too. So I think in case things get up. I have lashes too. So I think in case things get up. You know, when we get my scientists and talk about lashes and wear red strings on our wrist to support Kablabla, it's really great. It's like, Tariya, look at that red string off your wrist. Celebrity Beef, you never know if you're just gonna end up on TMZ or trending on Twitter

or in court. I'm Matt Bellasife. And I'm Sydney Battle, and we're the host of Wonder E's new podcast, Dis and Tell. Each episode explores a different iconic celebrity few, from the buildup, why it happened, and the repercussions. What deserve session with these feuds say about us? We're starting off with a pretty messy love triangle between Selena Gomez and Justin and Haley Bieber.

A seemingly innocent TikTok of Selena talking about her laminated eyebrows? It's snowballed into a full-blown alleged feud. But it doesn't seem like fans are letting up anytime soon. Despite both Selena and the Bieber's making public statements denying any bad blood. How much of this is teen jealousy and lovers quarreling, and how much of it is a carefully crafted narrative designed to sell albums? Follow this and tell wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen ad-free on the Amazon Music or Wonder Yeah. So Teresa's like, knock on wood, everything feels right.

Which is sad because I still don't know if she totally knows exactly what wood is. She's like going up to the grass, like, knock on wood. That's the grass. And she's like, you should take more time, ma. And she's like, it's been a year. I know them longer than I knew that girl rose from camps, and she asked me to marry her for more

times, I mean. Mm-hmm, mm-hmm, mm-hmm. So, Teresa's like, it's crazy how life works. I mean, we're moving into development, that my broad, I lived in. And it turns out that they are moving in to next door to Joe Gorka and Melissa But God life is crazy, isn't it because they are moving out guys

Dead Ben Sad is calling that so are so oh my god my dad always calls Hi dad Dad are you there? You're here How's it going? Oh, what is all that squeaky noise? It's just it's just the walls creaking. We're in Atlanta. We're doing our show Okay, okay, I'll talk to you guys later. Bye. Yeah

What's all that squeaking? It's all that squeaky noise. So everybody else, everybody else on Real Housewives of New Jersey so far, they're like, one second, look, Chen Karinoshab, look, someone did something. And then Teresa, it's like 20 minutes of Teresa sitting in the rain like, but I love Kim, so I love him. So now we move on to the next part of this scene where Joe Gorgah, the victim of all victims, right? Poor Joe Gorgah.

So basically, there's a group text going on between the Dwaris and Joe Guga. She is like, I'm still mad at him. I'm still mad at him. So, she is, they're mad because of everything that went down last season. And basically, because last season, Joe Guga was like, he killed my fucking mother, but I didn't agree with that. I was fucking with Joe Joe. And by the way, I did not disagree with anything he said on fucking mother, but I had a grave, I was fucking my Jojo.

And by the way, I did not disagree with anything he said on that front, to be honest. I put my mother in an early grave. She's cubes flying. Growing the cheese cubes, I didn't, yeah. And she is like, well, I broke my back. And I said, but you did so many terrible things, Joe. And he's like, oh, well, I guess I'm a terrible person, I guess it's just me, I'm a terrible person.

Everyone hates me. That's it, then. I guess I'm just a worse, all right? I guess I'm the enemy, all right? Mm-hmm. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like can be mad that you're... Yeah, no, you, I mean I think like if you're if like someone calls your dad a piece of shit, like you should be mad, you know. Then again your dad is Joe, Joe dies though. Yeah, but I mean even if he's a piece of shit, you don't want someone else saying it. Like that's my right, you know? Like I'm saving that shit up for Christmas when you're drunk. Or I could be like, you know what, you piece of shit.

Yeah. You don't want to waste it. It's like a once in a lifetime thing you get to tell your parents for the first time. Yeah. Once a year she says. That's fancy. That's fancy.

She's like, you know me. Yeah. So anyway, so they're like really mad. And then he, he, he, Joe Gorgas, he keeps on saying like, oh, well, I'm the bad guy, I'm the bad guy. He kind of has to drop that around the girls because the truth is we all know that Joe He's saying, oh, well, I'm the bad guy, I'm the bad guy. He kind of has to drop that around the girls because the truth is, we all know that Jojo dices a piece of shit.

But he just has to drop it and zip it up. And I like the victim. You're right. But also, Joe Gorga isn't the classiest either. I mean, let's not forget their first season when they were trying to sell their big phony mansion that was made out of like Legos and paper mache Yes, the real estate agent came over and they were like, oh look at this. It's mobile. Okay, it's not its foam and it's painted like marble so

Or when last year he's like before and after Here's the before picture of a house and it's like like a tin can that's crunched up on the street. And he's like, and he's after. And it's this huge gorgeous mansion. And then the owner of the mansion was like, that's not your house. That is my house, sir. It's like Sandra Bullock, like, please don't do this.

So basically now the kids are just, they're mad at Uncle Joe. and they're mad and they're like, you know, he hasn't even tried to take his out to dinner and everything like that. So things are a little fraught. She's like, listen girls, I just want you to do the right thing. Okay, okay, so then Dolores, you know, good old Dolores. Dolores is, Dolores is you know, good old Dolores Dolores is Dolores is driving along and she gets a she gets a phone call and if you ever imagined your head

What a phone call with Dolores and Frankie in the car would sound like it's literally this scene. Hey Frankie How's it going? You're coming over to the house Frankie. What are you gonna do today? I'm driving I'm driving house. You're gonna come over there. There's a new stop sign. They put up never used to be a stop sign This is stop sign now Frankie and he sounds like kind of a superhero young version of Frank, you know It's like he's an origin story of Frank He's like, hey, ma fix the your hat to her. Hat to her Ma. Has it?

The fix? She's like, well, you know what? It's not fixed, but there's not a motorcycle in the living room, so it's progress. You just have 37 dogs in the fucking house. What do you want from me? What do you want? So now Dolores comes home to her house. And now we have, like, now Gabby is there there to with the million dogs, you know

Okay, Gabs all right Gabs. I got a lot of dogs here at Gabs Your brother Frank is coming over we can get the bell ready for the blow blow jobs Etc don't know where your dad is how are you doing the blow job Bell? I will never forget the blow job Bell that Frankie hasn't got you know what they got a blow job Bell when it when they want a blow job They ring the bell. It's not good. Yeah like you know what when I hear that blowjob bell go off what I do is I walk from the kitchen to the living room to the kitchen and back again until it stops staying in okay that's what I do I've been ringing bells in my house ever since nothing happens okay even the ring doorbell goes off. I'm like unzipping. I'm like, come on, Frupa.

We can do this. It's show time! So, yeah, Gabby, love that you're taking care of dogs. Take care of them out of my house. There's like 50 dogs here. Get them out. Out. It's crazy. So Frankie comes over and has tight pants, which we all appreciate. He's like, hey, Ma, hey, Ma, how's it going, Ma? Hey, Ma. Hey. How's it going? You know what? I wore these, I wore these, these pants work, which is good. Love work. Working for Louis. He's a good guy. Louis is a good guy. Good guy. You know what? His real mistake. I love Louis. He really makes a difference. He really makes a difference. Who are you? Why are you talking like that?

And why does he really talk like that? And why does the lores keep putting Frankie with these terrible mentors? Every day, she's like, well, you know what? I saw that Charles Manson is an interesting person. So I said, Frankie, why don't you go work for Charles Manson and Jail? I was like, yeah, you know what I'm going to do that, ma'am? He seems like a good guy.

You know what? Very seems like a good guy. It's a good guy. You know what? Very inspiring. Very inspiring guy. Trust me. Very inspiring guy. So then Dolores, it's the latest. Dolores' storyline always is what, why don't you have cabinets?

It's always something along the lines, you know? It's like, why aren't there covers over the electricity sockets? Why? Look, the molding is not done, the door knobs, there's no paint, there's actually, there's not even a wall here We have an open-ended house over here. I mean, there's no microwave, there's no dishwasher I'm a viscerated. I'm a viscerated. The thing that really bugs me is to know cabinets. Because I understand like the open, you know, like... Oh, open.

What do they call it? Open Concepts. No, no, no. Like, what are the cabinets? Oh. I have that. I don't even know what it's called. And I saw it and I was like, oh my God, how trendy.

And then you get it and you're like, where the fuck do I put a bowl? Yeah. You can't put it up there. Where the kitchen aid go, you know? We're all my plastic straws go. Because you know I have that shit stockpile. I'm like, I need a cabin. You need a hide thing.

But she doesn't even have shelves or anything. She's just got like tiles, you know? So that bothered me more than you. I got it. So then, every bothered me last year too, and she still has not gotten the cabin. I'm gonna stop now.

So then, slow renovation. She's talking about Frank and how his priorities are a little off. Listen, he's got this girlfriend's, all right. Mm-hmm. She's young. Yeah. She's young and she doesn't need life preserves if you know what I mean.

Oh, really? I'm like that, the potato, call the rigatoni starter. I know. I know Dolores with their new button, everything isn't talking about that, but I support her anyway, because I'm always team Dolores. Yeah.

So if they decide, they're like, okay, we're gonna face time your father because we don't have dual knobs on either the doors here. And Frankie keeps getting stuck in the bathroom when he shits, okay? So they call it Frank, and Frank's like, Hey, the law! The law! I was going on the law! What the law? The law! The law! The law! The law! The law! What are you doing? You know what?

I'm doing this week, the law. I can't come to the company, I should fucking out to this week, the law! All right? I'm rehearsing. I'm rehearsing for my show! My show! I'm going to show the law! The show, the law a person from a show, my show, the Lord, the show the Lord, it's a show. And so we see a little poster for the show, so for those who don't know, all the house

husbands of Jersey decided to come together. It's basically like the, this generation's comic relief, and the poster says, Sinatra meets the real house husbands of New Jersey, an evening of music, storytelling, and comedy. Gosh! Gosh, you're different than ladies, am I right? It's like a lot of ball moving. Oh, just in my mouth.

This is just she was funny. She was funny right now. I'm like putting this finger at Joe Bork. I got you, bro. Got you. moving, you know, like, oh, just in my booth, the day she was funny, she was funny right now. I'm like putting this finger on Joe Borges, but I got you, bro, got you. What's the deal with door knobs? I got an X. She always wants door knobs and all her doors.

Am I right, everyone? I think I think I think I think I think I think I think. I got you not right here. So, Laura says, like, you know what, you rehearsing for a show, how about you get some door knobs on, Frank? All right, how about that? Why don't you know what, you were rehearsing for a show. How about you get some tournob song, Frank? All right, how about that? Why don't you do that, Frank?

And he's like, what is it? Jimmy's so death-friendly, the Lord. And she's like, do I need to go over it again? Everyone's going molding. She goes over the whole list again. So on, knobs. So then, Frankie, poor Frankie, he's like, this house is going to tear us apart. Frank, Frank, no, it's not going to tear us apart. Okay, just a stressful

situation. I got a hot new girlfriend and a great comedy show and your mother's a little concern. Everything's gonna be okay. I swear to God. It's like, Frank, we can no longer see you because your FaceTime is just saliva. It's like going in the car wash and you just see like... Sorry, but I'm just going to turn into an apple now and shut down. Not waterproof. So, Stramatic thing. They shoot horned this dramatic thing and they're like, I love, we just hear a ring. My zipper comes undone. And then we just hear a, hey babe, how are you?

You know, but how are you? You know, what, how are you? That's what I'm saying. Did you see this video with Louie? He's got it, dress it. He's got it, dress it. It's weird. It's a weird video.

Everyone's talking about it. It's got it, dress it. Everyone's talking about it. It's such a media. It's got a dress to talk about. Everyone's talking about it. It's such a media. It's just crazy. It's a millennia's talking about it. Everyone is just crazy. OK. Everyone is.

And then we see all the tweets pop up on the screen. They start to cover the screen like an outbreak. It's like when COVID first came, but it's like really poorly worded tweets out of Jersey. Right. Yeah. Ha ha ha ha. I'm Like there were 10 tweets from different people that said, how strange.

It's like who's in charge of screenshotting these? Yeah, there was one tweet that said, I'm so creeped out, wish I could unsee this. But we were not sure if it was about Louis or just like. The Jersey show. We don't know. So now we're now we wind up after this like mysterious montage of tweets and concern. We wind up at Marge's house and Joe, Joe, okay, okay, Joe.

I don't know what happened to my trays. Where my trays, Joe. I think they were in the oven. I'm like, please don't let this concern be about Margaret's trays. Like all the tweets are in. The internet is exploding. Where are Margaret's trays?

So she's like, listen, I mean, I need ice in my glass man's server. And all right, Jackie is coming up. We need to talk about this video. All right, you know what? I'm not holding in my hand right now. Ice coffee. Can we just make this happen, please?

This is ridiculous. This is crazy. This holding in my hand right now, ice coffee. Can we just make this happen, please? This is ridiculous. This is crazy. This is, by the way, this is my impersonation of her holding ice coffee. Look at this. Isn't this so accurate? What it looks like in real life? This huge glass. And she's like, we have to talk about this video. And she's like, how can you not talk about it? It's like an elephant in a room. And she's like, it's like a movie mammoth show.

And he's like, it's like, it's like a movie mammoth Joe. And he's like, it's like a walrus. You know what, that's smaller than a movie mammoth Joe. You gotta go bigger Joe. You gotta get bigger than a rabbit. You're very bad at this Joe. All right. Why don't we start small with a rabbit and then scale up?

Get a wet Joe. I mean, get a rabbit in the room. My ice is naked without coffee on top of it right now. What are you doing? What are you doing standing there competing with me about large animal swork? You got time to lose, you got time to Bruce, buddy. Get to it. Get to it. So one of the real weird things about this episode was that I guess they didn't get the clearance to show this famous video on the show. And so it's weird you have like Margaret describing it and

want you to describing it they have this like stock footage of like models on a beach and everything and if you've never seen this video you think it's like you're probably extremely confused and they make it look like it's so sexy but this is what it really looks like okay. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. If that's okay with you, if that's okay. All right, and we're gonna be your family, and then he's surrounded by all these guys. Bro, speak from your heart. Yeah. Yeah, bro.

Come on. Do what better, bro. Speak from your heart. Come on, bro. Come on, you could do it. All right, let me try to get. I love you. Hey.

Look at him, bro. Look at it. Use your eyes, bro. Use your eyes, bro. I love you. Speak from your heart, bro. Use the eyes on your heart, bro. Look at him, use your eyes, bro. Use your eyes, bro. I love you. Speak for me, hot bro. Use the eyes on your hot bro.

Look at camera, bro. I love you. I love you. I love you. Song, sing it. I love you. Okay, I love you. Okay, I love you.

I love you. Say it again, to a face, say a name. You know what I mean? Say something that sounds like a name. To the camera. I love you. Say it again, not to face, say a name, you know a name? Say something that sounds like a name, to the camera. I love you. He's like never gonna book a commercial this guy.

We want more, we want more, we want more sir, he just keeps going, I love you. I'm sorry for whatever I did to him. Bro, bro, come on bro do better She don't want to see that she don't want to hear your fucking brain all right She wants to hear your fucking You have to get your fucking But he keeps saying these really weird things. He's like I want to I want to make you my wife when I get home

That's romantic. Yeah, it's like super specific. Listen, I love you and I was thinking maybe we could go to Applebee's tonight. What do you think? Is that good? It's okay with you. But also this video is very unfair because obviously it's like a

man's male retreat or whatever where you fucked up. And you're like, you know, it's like when you send your dog, like your dog's been peeing in the house too much so it goes away to like dog camp or whatever where you fucked up and you're like, but you know, it's like when you send your dog, like your dog's been peeing in the house too much, so it goes away to like, dog camp or whatever. I would like to think that Bueller would do that. Like, I love you, I'm sorry. I'm sorry, I'm right. But it's like some camp to, I guess, better yourself.

But it's all these guys who are shirtless, I mean, they're on a beach, but in the episode they say they're naked or something. Which I think might be you know They just did some really annoying like faux tribal shit whether you get into it like like like they're again in touch I'm not I'm trying to speak like Margaret I think it's just like getting in touch with it inside it. It's a tribal in a in a iced coffee. You know what I'm saying Yeah, so But they're all shirt, and they're all very serious. You know, spent Louis' face, I mean, it can't.

It's so good. Yeah. So, they're all gathered around him, but there's one fucking guy in a hoodie. How is that fair? Like, who let this guy in? Like, you're not coming to my mail retreat. Like, if I have to be fucking naked, my flap is down to my knees. Yours will be too, Starrstar with your fucking hoodie zip up.

So Jackie comes over to Margaret's house and marbles. Hi, honey, okay, okay, what do you want? Do you want ice coffee? You want ice coffee? The pellic reno? I'm just to say ice coffee into you, except the ice coffee into your life, okay? Ice coffee?

No, ice coffee? Okay, how about I get you a water? But I say it's ice coffee. Just I need it for my head. I need it for my head. I need it for my head. So Marge is describing this video to us. And it's like, I mean, first of all, this guy looks like he's been dragged in the river.

Which is, yes. Which is true, but that is also probably also his like coffee in a bagel picture. Like, I don't think Louie ever looks like he hasn't been dragged through a river. He's got that like, ow, ow, he's got that face. As a Jersey River too, you don't know really what's in those rivers. We all know. And he's apologizing for something. You know, obviously he did

something wrong. And Joe's like, yeah, it's a heavy situation. It's like a woolly fell of dolphin it shut up jump you know Jackie so good to see you here house Evan working out much We're on the same team just had to get it in there to see So there's a Theresa's gonna be having a kickoff to Samu Patti. Ha, blink blink. And Jackie is like, do you think she's going to bring up the video at the party? Exactly.

Does anyone really think Teresa is going to bring up the... Is she even going to bring up the concept of video as just an arc form? Ha, ha. But also,'t they want her to do like, air play at the pool party? This is so confusing. Like, you know what, should we send these to addresses? I'm like, what is it?

Like, male apology karaoke? You're like, don't get him started. Do not get him a microphone and ask him to explain. Cause you know, he'll be like, Hi everyone, I just wanted to thank you for coming to the blue body. We want to apologize. Here we go again. So Marge is basically like, listen, I don't want to be in her

and I'm in parade, okay? And Louis seems amazing, absolutely amazing. But he's not an apology to her and a video and you don't repent for some kind of behavior and that's something went wrong Okay, so you know and I'm saying you're not repentin less you sin All right, and so then we see a clip of Andy like whoa Kim did came after Looie saying he was an emotional diesel who slashed him tires. I'm sure he says just like, I love her angry blink like her nostril kind of twitches and

she's just like, eh. So Marge, it tells us that that, you know, there were some juicy brewers out there, and these videos give them some credibility. I mean, there is some explaining to you, Lucy. Okay. So, clearly, they're just trying to, like, having a moment like, are you going to bring it up? Should I bring it up? Who wants to do the scene, right?

But Jack, he's like, well, look, I can't do it. Okay, you know, we took a long time to get to a good place, so I really can't be the one to do it. But I can't wait to watch one if you do it. I mean, these two are salivating, because the last season premier was Teresa going around to the parking lot party, that Jackie's like, I'm in such a wonderful marriage party

or whatever the fuck that was. And then Teresa's like, I'm in such a wonderful marriage party or whatever the fuck that was. I'm in tree, so it's like, oh yeah, here, here, a husband's getting blow dimes into jam, right? So they're both thrilled for the storyline. So then they're saying that March says, you know, but Jen doesn't have the best judgment, okay? Which is an understatement. Yeah, because they're saying like, the people most likely to bring it up will either be Jennifer or Dolores.

And Raj is like, what? Jennifer doesn't have good judgment. She called me a snake and she said, show another sa-a crux. Okay, so then we get the Instagram on the screen which I just fucking loved. I thought it was so funny. So I see some people are threatened. You can take a sloppy comment and run it all you want. Hold on to it, but dear life, you got nothing else. Joke group is infested with a snake that talks behind all your backs. And you're just salty and barren to boot, baby.

It's the castle without that reach. You're gonna pull a mother. And then there's another one. You do my bow just reading. Oh, I don't care. I love it. I love a monologue moment. I love it. That anyone monologue as well.

It's Ron and Carol. So then this one is to Admiralist Gorgon. Wow. You really are stupid. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. He only got on because Teresa and that kills you. The audience has learned more about me in three years than they have of your measly 11.

Your measly 11 years. I know, I can check. You fake baby and sister that never was. Oh, sure. And when you divorce,. Oh, sure. And we're intervores. Oh, yeah, Brian. All they see is a stuff absorbed and says, And this behavior, I'm my own family, and I share it.

More than you ever had the guts to go. And better sit down, or some more, because you and your crooked family got nothing at scale. Bye, baby. got it some more, because you and your crooked family got nothing to ask out, bye! Baby! Shockingly accurate, shockingly accurate. That's probably how she typed it too. It's like, boop boop!

So, I was like, is this supposed to make me anti-gen? Because right now I'm like getting like little pieces of tissue paper on the end of pencils and dotting a little bit of glue on it and making a fucking parade flow. Okay. Yeah, so basically Margin Jackie, like, well, she's's got big, she's got skeleton, she's got big skeletons. And so then we go over. I mean, I don't like people coming after big skeletons. Fuck off with that.

So she's like, yeah, she's very unhappy. And Jackie's like, she's off smoking mirrors. And Marge is like, oh, guess what? Guess what? Hold on, wait for it. Joe, come in here for this one. Joe, come in. Yeah, Marge. like, I don't guess what, guess what, hold on, wait for it. Joe, come in here for this one. Joe, come in. Yeah, Munch.

Facky diamonds. It's well. And Jackie goes, ooh, smoke me and foggy diamonds. She's like, yeah. It felt very much like a book I would see at the airport. That was for you, John. That was for you, John. That was great. It's John loved that one.

That was for John. That was for John. So now we go to Melissa Gorga and Joe Gorgas. Oh, this is so. I've missed talking about this, so. I know. I've forgotten all our jokes. I'm like, oh, yeah, the Joan Rivers Joe. So Melissa and Joe are at a restaurant.

And Melissa's like, hey, Joe, did you know that the governor just lifted all the restrictions? And he just starts to take a dick out of his pants? No, not all the restrictions. Mask, Joe, mask. He's like King under the table. No Joe. Hey.

He's like, yeah, it's so wide open now. You know, you know how many divorces happen because of that? Joe, please tell me you're not doing some of your standup right now. Ayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy So then we meet Tracy and Tiki Barber. Yes, I had such a crush on Tiki Barber when I was younger. I really did. But he's a very charming guy. It's like, hello. I'm Tiki Barber. I'm ToloVision's Tiki Barber.

Tell me about Fried Calamari here. Yes, some Tiki Barber. Tiki Barber was from Fried Calamari. Thank you. Like you're charming, man. So, um, let's see, they talk about how they've all just been hiding at home since the disease. Which, you know, that's some bullshit in Jersey. No one's stayed home in Jersey.

No. We literally had a whole season. It's like, wow, COVID was rough. Home, man. Home, man. Oh, rough. I remember staying home. Remember when we didn't go to the Jersey Shore and we didn't throw cheese cubes around, God. So then, Tiki orders the Belvedere Martini

and shows like, yeah, same. I love that rock, but on the rocks, God. We're like brothers. We're like brothers. I mean, we both play football. We both love Mr. Belvedere. God, we're so brothers. We're like brothers. I mean, we both play football. We both love Mr. Belvedere. God, we're so like twins basically. Crazy, man.

So he's like, with like two piece and a mother fucking pod, but I'm better looking, right? I'm thinking he's like, oh, you. He's like, no. He's like, I'm wildly successful, and you're not. So he's like, you know wildly successful and you're not. So he's like, you know, we just did a show. You know, the guys, we just had a show, Tiki. And then we see a clip of Joe Comedy.

Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, guys, ha, ha. Guys, you ever seen a dog doing this? You ever see a dog doing that? You know what? Because he don't even got paws to jerk off. Yeah. He can't jerk off. That's why. Dogs can't jerk off. Thank you everyone. Good night. Good night. So then, so basically the gorgers are in a rental right now. They've actually moved to Frank.

They're moving to Franklin Lakes, which is a nice full circle moment for Jersey. Maybe they'll see Caroline Manza there. Yeah. With her sons just throwing ham at my cabinets. Let me tell you something about my family. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Vick of please. And we love Mackenzie Childs. We were supposed to do a show and we were making all these Jersey jokes, but we were supposed to do a show in Jersey like five days ago and it got snowed out for the bomb cyclone. And so we were watching season two of the original Posh fashion show. And wow. season two, the original posh fashion show. And... Wow. It's really amazing how much of an early adopter Caroline Manzoa is a McKenzie child.

She really was like a pioneer with that. She is. Yeah. And Teresa looked five years old. I mean, she had this like little baby face on her little chinchilla jacket running around the country but trying to murder Daniel. Oh, that's great.

I am from Paterson, bitch, if you can't. I'm saying to her, man. I'm saying to her. Pay attention, police, yeah. To be such. Classic, it's good. So Tracy's like, well, Theresa just sent me an invite. Is her boyfriend gonna be there?

And Melissa's like, well, she's been looking for Mr. Ryan, and he's this mind shining armor that's shining armor that's swept in. Come on, Joe, why the sad face, Joe. What? I'm trying to remember what Kalamari is. Why is it like fucking rings? What the fuck am I supposed to do with that? I'm like bubblegum and rings. I'm not sad. I just feel bad that dogs can't jerk off. That's all. So he's like, you know, I don't know. Listen, we saw Joe Judeis make a happy tool. Am I right? Get some of the bad guy. He goes, when I first met Louis, he was cool, okay? But now while you're all this stuff about him, he's like, but listen, there are always

two sides to his story. I mean, there's been lots of stuff about us out. That's just not true at all. She's been waiting eight years for this moment, right? Because she wedged in there. They're like, man, would you like a Caesar to start with? You know, it's funny that you mentioned that, because Julius Caesar was betrayed also.

Like, I was. She's been waiting, waiting to tell her side of this story. I don't know who these people are, but whenever I hear people say, oh, people, those are just rumors. Like the stuff about us. None of us, you know I Google that shit in me. Yeah. It's like, you know, red flags.

So quit Google. It was great. This is a good schedule. New York giant star Tiki Barber marries 23-year-old pin up wife while his wife is eight months pregnant. And I was like, oh, yeah. So Tracy on this show on Jersey says, you know I find it hard to judge other people like okay lies get out of here. You're on a housewife, so you're fired

because you know I've been married to Teaky for nine years and we have two children Brooklyn and Teagan, which I'm already like okay and then she goes, you know, he got separated from his ex-wife when she was eight weeks pregnant. But you know, I met Tiki when I was working at the Today Show as an intern. And he was already separated for months. And I turned to this huge circus. So like, so they separated while she was eight months pregnant. Is that what you're trying to know? It's weird because she does this weird line where she's like,

well we, you know, we got together when his wife was eight weeks pregnant. Oh, eight weeks. Which I guess is supposed to make it better. Like maybe she didn't know yet or like we don't know. Girl, and listen, I'm not judging you Tracy, man. So I'm not judging you Tracy, man. I'm judging myself. And I rule, did I'm a big fucker, Mark?

Of course I'm judging you, of course I am. Same. Same. Same. Same. Same. Same. Same.

We'll just stick with Ronde. That's his twin brother by the way. I know you don't know sports. Well, I'm Ronda and my mom is Ronda and I was like, this bitch is coming from me right now in Atlanta. So, so Joe Gorgas, like, you know, he told me about this camp when I first met him. And I was like, is it a camp that teaches dogs how to jerk off? Cause they need to know that, huh? Commissions, here comes one right now.

So, Melissa's talking about saying how it's basically a retreat for men to come back from whatever they're suffering from, like rampant cheating syndrome, you know. And Tiki is like, yeah, there was something off in his life. And Melissa's like, oh, but you know Teresa, she's just going to say, Oh, he's amazing. Did you see the way you apologize? What an amazing man. And it was actually a pretty accurate read from Melissa.

That's pretty much what Theresa does, too. On the other hand, and I hate to do this, it's not nice to make an effort. It's like the guide cheats on you. Listen, we've seen on all of these shows and in my real life. These fuckers cheat on you and do all kinds of things, and then they blame your ass. This guy at least got naked on a beach with some other weird guys and like did a monologue.

Sit me, I was like he's dreamy. I love him. I love the effort. Not in my favorite. Olivia. Big Ford Smothor. Big Ford Smothor. And then, that's Olivia's setting the table for a family dinner.

Big Ford Smothor. She's got like her eyes shadow on. Yeah. Olivia, doing a good job with the Forks and Spoons. And she's still doing her like we're on TV, so I'm a princess, mother. Yes. Don't talk too much down there.

Don't get your ass. Or I will get your ass. You're talking, see, didn't hear me threaten you, you see? I love you, and I love your Patricia Cafftann but Yeah, we got Patricia Cafftann in the farm here, but I'll also strangle you with the deflong hand too So so the so the whole family is sitting down for dinner and Like Jennifer's made all these like delicious looking gobs and everything and Libya's, guys, we use our smaller forks for the salad. You know all her brothers and sisters are like, um, mother, what did you do to this hurt? Mother, are we gonna have a salad

because I put it big for it? She's like, we can, do you want? Yes. So then Olivia, wait, who asked the mom? The other kid Gabriella, right? Someone's like, oh no, Olivia, guys, we're using the big boy. Mom, can you breathe in that bandage? And Jen's like, of course, we're talking around. We're talking around. Bill's like, mm, I got it, man. It's very unusual to wear that for so long.

Bill is so salty. And she says that he didn't want to do the surgery because she's the worst patient ever, which I believe, but he seems really pissed that she went off to Turkey and got this. Because he's like, hmm, that long, you keep it on, isn't it the most recent one on the Jew day at all? And she's like, how do you do it, Bill? And he goes, hmm, you take the splint out and that's it. Hmm, I mean, people don't want others to know they've had surgery.

So then we get like, we get the million dollar moment where we get the before and after. And this is weird because I felt like the before picture was the after and the after was the before. I was like, did she get nose fillers? They have those, they have that shit. And she also does a thing where she makes sure she's standing right at the exact same spot under her stairs. You know, did you notice that?

It's like the stairs are behind her. She's like at the exact same, which I don't know why, but I thought that was interesting. I don't know, you know, I feel bad for her because, I mean, you have to, I mean, look at her. But also because it's so hard to learn how swive's timing and they all run into this, like, when am I supposed to get my Botox? Remember Shannon came back like crazy? Yeah.

She looked like a stormtrooper. Or Vicki Gunvelson, that one season, where she came back, looking like she was in spirited away. She was like, oh, yeah, so it's hard to time it, you know. And I know if I could afford that shit or could afford a plane ticket to Turkey and an Instagram post, I get everything done. She's like, so I went to Turkey baby to visit my brother and meet finally meet my nephew and we had a christening. Oh, I was there. I got my nose and my chin's up, bye bye. I was like, it's bad when you make Daniels, dogs, like blockbuster video, plastic surgery,

look up pretty good, you know. Yeah. Yeah. So kids, they put tampons in my nose, like, yeah, mom, girls! And Bill goes, well, we're glad you made it. Bye! What's going on with the bill? Bill's going to kill her. Like, Bill's planning on murdering her ass in her sleep. He was being extra weird today. Well, home, man. Welcome back, girlfriend.

So she's like, you know, can you put this phone down, son? Oh, yeah, so they're talking to the kids and stuff. We're all older and Jen's telling them that she made up with her mom because they both saw the baby at the same time. I was like, I'm sure your family loved you coming to the christening and then making it all about you in the fucking hospital. That is so gen.

Like, wow, to baby, anybody gonna come visit me? So they shoe off the kids to go upstairs and they show off the grandpa, support grandpa just puttering around. And now it's just Jen Bill. He's like, mm, it's so sweet to see Olivia happy that you and your mom made up. Mm.

She's like, yeah, how much you could be that easy to make it mens with the girls? So now she's going to start acting. Like, she is the victim, even though she was like a vile monster on the reunion. And set the worst things. I'm pitted everyone against each other. Now she's gonna be like,

why is no one talking to my bad, bad? I love it. So you're like, saw, they were me and the man Instagram there, satisfied back with my own post. Which I just read to you. And they'll say, well, maybe calling Joe Gorgher,

a crook with a little more gasoline on the fire Last thing I would want would be Joe Gorgher just covered in shimmering hot gasoline Muscles ablaze and flames smoke from all crevices Terrible From all crevices, mmmm, terrible. You know Joe actually made a good point. I never have seen a dog masturbate. Also, you know there's trouble over just these two lines. Honey, you're gonna eat that being salad?

And he goes, I ate half. No one else is eating it. Oh! You think bean salad is easy. I wanted to lose it on his ass for her. I was like, she made you a bean salad, out there you throw a bean salad in her face. You know, I wasn't going to mention this, but I felt like there was some meaning in this moment too, because earlier in the scene,

Jen has like, you know what? Bill said I'm a terrible patient, so I had to get a doctor and take me. And then there was just like a long close up of kebabs. And I didn't know what that meant, but I felt like it symbolized something. Like, and now the kebabs.

This is what happens. And now it's getting cute to meet for dinner. Now I got a nose that looks like a kabob, baby. So anyways, so she is talking about how she's been iced out of the group and how their Margaret had a pride party and invited everyone, except for Jennifer. And Bill's like, just take the high road but you know. That might be a bit much.

Just take a road. Just take a road. Just make sure you take any road. Any road. Don't swim. Right. So, Jen's like, listen, I'm not here to fight. I'm excited to hang out with Louis.

And he's like, hmm, hmm. So then we start talking about the video. And she's like, you know what? So then we start talking about the video. And she's like, you know what? Obviously, she's something going around like that. And look, it's a little weird. But it was private. So, you know what? I don't know if Treeside, but I know someone

mentions that she's going to pet Al. Pee-bo. Pee-bo. So now we go over to Joe Gorgas now on the phone with Teresa and we just hear him say, he's got to grow a set of balls. Is he talking to the bug man? He could be talking. He's talking to Dorodash.

Like, I imagine that he could be talking to any of those. What do you mean you can't find the place? Grow a set of those. What do you mean you can't find the place? Grow a set of bulls. So apparently Teresa is pissed because at the big standup show, a girl, Gorgas said something's about Louis that she didn't like so much, huh? We see a clip of that and someone's like,

So child, what do you think of Louis? And he's like, I never miss my brother and lost so much. And I'm like, what's up, child? What do you think of Lily?" And he's like, I never miss my brother in law so much. And I'm like, woohoo. And then this is Melissa's face every time they show Gorga doing stand-up clips. She's always like, she's like the audience in an infomercial. Did you write rid of that fast?

Always looking into whatever camera is filming her at all. I don't even know how she gets them all, because you know there's a bunch of iPhones everywhere. And she's like, Cal Richards taught me how to do this. Yeah. So Joe's like pretending to cry. He's like, I didn't know what to say.

So I said something funny against him, the bad guy. And she's like, well, you know, she sensitive. And he's like, but it was funny and right. And she goes, yeah, you blew it off. You really did him a favor. And he's like, put it over. That's other things too. The girls say, I don't take them to dinner or nothing.

The dog is sick of me showing it porn. Nothing. Nothing. Nothing. Nothing. Nothing. Nothing. Nothing. The dog is sick of me showing it porn. Nothing. Nothing. Nothing. Nothing. Nothing. Nothing.

Nothing. The dog is sick of me showing it porn. Nothing. So then he goes, he goes, you know what? The good guy always wind up lasts. Which I thought was funny that he couldn't even say nice guys finish last. I was like, you know what's up? It's like the easiest phrase to say.

Good guys, if there's a line, do not at the front of it. That's what I got to say. So Teresa's setting up a pool on Piney. And she's made it all about Pineapples, which is a lot of pineapple. I'm still sweet. In case you forgot, Teresa loves pineapple because it makes her vagina taste good. Yeah.

Good for you, but do I have to go to that party? So she's setting up pineapples everywhere and then we go to Dolores's house where she's looking herself in the mirror and there's a little dog at her feet, she goes, dog, come here. Because I had forgotten that Dolores had named her dog, the most Dolores name, dog. You know, ever since Boo went away, we got dog. Hey, dog, hey, dog, what are you doing, dog? Do you want me to smile on something, dog? Okay, dog.

So then we see everybody basically getting ready, right? She's talking to Frank on the phone to help her with clothes. And then Evan's talking to Jackie. And Jackie's like, just pick a good chair. Actually Teresa would love it if you weren't wearing one. And Marge is with Joe. And she's like, you know what? The last time Teresa had a party,

Jen puts that drunk mess. Do you remember that Jeff? Marge is just ready. I mean those cameras came on and she's like, I bet, I'm motoring half this cast this year. Get ready. You know what, every year Margaret just wants to destroy Jennifer and then something happens

where she pulls back, you know what, she's a good girl, she just doesn't know what she says all the time, she's a good girl. Margaret hates Jennifer, it's so obvious. I think this is the year where she says, you know what, I've been on the show for four years. I don't have to worry about Theresa anymore. I'm going after Jennifer.

Fuck it. You know, I'm taking it down. So then over at Jen, she's like, do you think taking a gang up? I'm in that. And he's like, they did the last time. You take one of those high school friendships. Mean girls loved it.

I'm not just a mom. I'm a cool mom. We did, you know. I'm on the a mom, I'm a cool mom. Tina, Tina. I'm on the Tina train. What were we talking about? So then, yeah, so now, yeah, just more back and forth, just things getting ready and everything, and then we go to Dolores, and she's like, I wish you were coming to the party tonight.

Talking to Frank, are you talking to Frank? Frank, I wish you were coming to the party, but unfortunately there's no door knob. So you're going to be stuck in the bathroom all night. I'll bring you back a cheese tray. You know what, I'm going to have to let Theresa know that what happened in Atlantic City with the guys. The light was a joke, it was a joke? What are you going to do?

Call the cops for dogs masturbating to the Lord. Let me come out and go to the Lord. But Dolores of course knows. This video is gone viral, but she's going to make sure that Teresa doesn't turn on her this year. So she's like, even though Teresa already knows this, I'm tattle-telling on everyone there. Yeah, she's got to put in that moment.

So Dolores shows up at Teresa's house and she's like, hey, three, I'm doing a shot. Should I wait for you? I don't know why I wrote this down. Like, it gets him and wants to know what Dolores did as soon she arrived. I'm doing a shot. I'm doing a shot. She's like, oh, wow, a pineapple party. A whole party based on Teresa's vaginal juices. Self-fine. Three, you want to do a shot. I'm doing a shot. Oh wow, a pineapple party. A whole party based on Teresa's vaginal juices.

So fun. Teresa, you want to do a shot? Say, yeah, good. You know Teresa's in the shit when she's talking in that voice. Yeah. I know a bad laugh. Dolores is like, now I know that Teresa doesn't want to talk about the video, because, you know, she doesn't want to see Louis nervous, but it's like the pink elephant in the room.

I love when they just like, it's not enough just to be the elephant in the room, it's the pink elephant. So I access to rise that. Teri's like, oh my God, when I'm in the wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, something to re-sale your new house. You got doing ups. So then Margaret shows up and out of nowhere, I don't know why, they start playing some tricky monical. Did you notice that? Margaret shows up and we hear, we got a shake, the reef off, we got a scream at laugh, and then just as over, I was like, okay, what's that? Is there something flying over here? Is it a bug? How dare you, how dare you insect?

I did notice that Marge came in a ponytail with handles on it, in case anybody tried to pull that shit this year. Did you see that? It was like built with rungs. So let's see Melissa and Joe come and Joe's still whining, you know. I'm like, we weren't going to come. I was like, yeah, right, you two were going to miss a filming event. I'm sure Melissa. I know. So she's like, we weren't going to come but tree cooled and apologized. And, you know, then we see GSC Joe come in and G is at the bar going. Like, ready. G is ready to pounce us here too. So, Melissa's whole thing is like, you know what?

They never talk about it. They just sweep it under the rug. So then Jackie shows up and she's like, you know what? This time last year, if Evan Evan had his arms wrapped around Teresa, they'd probably be around her neck. But it's a lot better to be friends with Teresa than to be enemies because that woman will come for you. Thank you very much, that was my line.

Thank you, thank you. Did you guys notice that they kept cutting to this new lady who we didn't meet yet? But there was like some dark head lady and you know that she talks like this You just know it, you know, and they kept cutting to her and she would be like Cheers And then you wouldn't see her she'd ever said anything and then they'd show people mingling and you just see her walk past people like That's like who who is that?

Probably the mayor of the town. Welcome to Ten of Fly. I came out way for her. OK, so let's see. Joe's nervous. Everybody's making small talk. And then, cheers. So then, Tiki and Tracy come in.

And Tracy's like, I need a drink and Tracy goes, do you drink a lot of pineapple? And she goes, obviously. What does that mean? Like warning it or something like, obviously. Doesn't my vagina look like it tastes delicious? I know. So then Dolores, Tiki is now stuck in the corner of the party.

He's like desperately waiting for someone to save him because he's stuck talking to Dolores who's going, so my boyfriend, you're never going to see him because he's always working. His name is David. And, you know, when I need my fill in, my ex-husband Frank comes in, but he's awake. He's got a new girlfriend. She's got boobs. You can throw her in the those. She's gonna float. She'll be fine Frankie just got a blowjob last night like bells going off all night But I'm happy for him drop some pasta on the floor

You have a pasta in a floor Tiki had to pick that up all night longer than dog. He just shat I was like Frankie Why don't you walk dog around there? Where's Gabby? Where the fuck is Gabby? She's supposed to be but she's not helping You know, but she's great. She's a great kid to be veterinarian Anyway, pineapple juice. I don't know if I like pineapple juice that much, but you know what, I love these table claws. You see the video of Louise, kind of crazy, right? But you know what, Eiki cares, it's emotional.

Anyway, what's your name again? She's like, Chees, like, Chees, like, Chees, like, Chees, like, Chees, like, Chees, like,

Chees, like, Chees, like, Chees, like, Chees, like, Chees, like, Chees, like, Chees, like, Chees just like, uh-huh, uh-huh. So then Teresa goes, be right back, gotta wash my hands. Just in case you're worried about the COVID protocols of the party. I guess the whole party is about your vagina. I have to wash my hands and I'm not even there.

Okay. So she goes inside and March is talking to Jackie and she's like, you know what? Teresa is not going to bring up this video. I just know she's not going to bring it. I mean, it's a little weird. So much to bring up the video. What should we bring up the video? Who's going to bring it up? Because they know whoever is the one who's going to bring it up is going to have to fight with her all season long. And it's like, who's going to do it? And Jack is like, I did that last season. I'm exhausted, you know? So then Dolores goes up to Teresa.

She's like, all right, I'll do this. She goes, Teresa, I want you to know what happened in Atlantic City. Mm-hmm. Yeah. One day. It's a city in New Jersey. You can know before.

It's in the, it's on the, it's Miss America Atlantic City. Okay. So when the guys that walked on stage and somebody said, how do you feel about Louis, your brother, and he goes, oh, I'm missing Joe Duda, it's a lot right now. Ah, that's so nice. That's so nice.

And she's like, what? Huh? Huh? Did you not hear me Teresa? And Dolores is chewing gum. And she just stops chewing her gum. She's like, Teresa is like, I'm playing dumb, did it. Because you know why?

No one should be in Louise business. And it's better than pretend I don gonna just be there for two minutes. She's like, how come did it? And he's like, it's gonna be so much pressure. I'm sorry. And then like a shirtless guy gets on the phone and is like, come on, tell her what you're gonna do. I'm gonna go there. I'm gonna go there. I'm gonna just be there for two minutes.

She's like, how come did it? And he's like, it's gonna be so much pressure. I'm sorry. And then like a shirtless guy gets on the phone and is like, come on, tell her from your heart. Tell her when you're gonna be there, huh? Come on. Look at your GPS and tell her.

Come on. Two minutes away, bro. Speak from your fucking hand. By the way, so Teresa, when she played dumb, I mean, I believed her at first when she was like, I believe her, at first. I believed her. I believed her. To me, it's like, okay, guess what Teresa, you just proved on camera that you can lie real

well. Every time she's like, I didn't know about something. I'm like, rolled a clip of this scene, rolled a clip. So anyway, that insect was a ladybug. That is very lucky. Was there a ladybug over there? Yeah, girl. Wait, we want to have a look at the ladybug.

Where is it? You have seen a ladybug try to jerk off. Poor things. They don't even know what a jerk off. It's right there on a bottle. Look at that thing. It's stupid. Poor fucking ladybug. I think we once got assaulted by a ladybug

on a live show before. Hey, this was a special moment. So then Joe's like, oh my god, Louise here. You know what, this video came out because all the guys are gossiping. And on Jersey, Jersey guys are like the biggest gossip, right? So they're all gossiping.

And Evan's like a video about what? You just want to stay biggest gossips, right? Yeah. So they're all gossiping and Evan's like a video about what? You just want to stay out of this shit, right? Yeah. So Benino's like, you know what? It's like a bunch of guys. I think they were naked. It's kind of weird. By the way, amidst all this, Louis has a rise.

I was like, Psst! Psst! Psst! Psst! Sorry to everyone at home who's listening. Who had to hear that? Hoking around my party, just doing my kids' cope chop.

Yeah, yeah. So, he's purple. I mean, the man is purple. Okay. And Martin's like, Oh, look, it's Louis. He appears to be nervous. Like you think? You think? And Delores is like, I mean, why wouldn't he be, am I right? And she's like, listen, he has to understand. You know what? Like Melissa was telling me they had this big family feud last night. I mean Melissa told me to to Teresa told Joe the weed was upset of her joking made-up stage. I heard it

girls. I heard like she's just going around like a I heard. I write Louisa Mouster. But also Melissa's on the rough. Damn Marth is just coming right out. And I also just really like the idea that they had a family feud last night. Like maybe they just played family food. Okay, so we asked 100 people, huh? What pet would you like to see jerk off? Ha, ha, ha, ha. So then, yeah, she's like, yeah, I mean, look at him. He looks like Grimis running out of oxygen.

Like the guy looks like Grimis under a dry cleaner bag. Well, it was weird. He had to have his shirt on. He didn't have bros behind him. And he's like, oh, what do I do? So when Marge says, when Marge tells Dolores his gossip, like, you know,

Teresa's upset over this Atlantic city video, Dolores is like, wait a minute. She told me she never fucking saw it. And she's fine with it. And Martin was like, not what Melissa told me. She said they almost did make it here. That's her paddock was. You know what the issue is, when you pretend you don't care and you're lying about it, it makes it look like you do care.

A zing. So, her mom Teresa is coming. I'm right here. I said you were coming. I mean, so I said, all right, Teresa, listen. You know what? I think Louie needs to address the video. The day, address it. Give him a microphone.

Give him a microphone. You know what? Play hopelessly devoted to you with something. So we have some music on the room. I don't care. Say something. Speech. Dun, dun, dun.

Louie would like to address something. He say something, speech. Dun, dun, dun, dun. Louis would like to address something. He's like, ah! Such a reassess like, hey, I said, pardon his past, and he doesn't know anyone in explanation. Like, you know, I think he's an amazing man, and I go by how me and Louis, like a present and future.

He has lashes, I have lashes. Respect my home. Respect me. Respect my pulls, did it? Okay, absolutely. So, Marge is like, listen, you know what, you just have to understand. People love you. They just want what's best for you,

which is why I want you to publicly humiliate yourself and your boyfriend right now. But yeah, please. So then we cut away, and I don't know why we cut away to these two, but we cut away to them, and they get their own chiro on the screen. It's like, Marie and Marianne have entered. And I was like, it's one of the girls.

Yeah, it was just Marie and just Maria. Hey, but yeah, Maria, Maryanna here. Let me tell you something. I got a candle at Bath and Body Works and it smells delicious. Thank you. Thank you very much. So, uh, Trees is like, I'm a big girl, you know, it's been almost seen you with Louis and I'm having his cream, all right? And she's like, I get it. You're miserable Ms. Rippling, he's a monster. Come to Mama, say it on Mike. I've got a Mike idea. Say it right here.

And let's see, now they're talking about Jennifer. Okay, so Dolores is like, with Jennifer, while she late, and Marge goes, last time she was here, her face was on the pavement. Tell you that, man. So now Jennifer and Bill walk in. Jennifer like walks like, you would think she was, every footstep was like,

ba, ba, ba, ba, ba, ba, ba. So she struts right in and they're talking about her. It's like an elliptical machine going really slowly. Yeah. Surprise doesn't have a little fur around her shoulders and like a cigarette holder. My husband's gonna get ya. So Margaret is just keep fuming seeing her, you know. She's like, oh my god, she tried to ruin our relationship. She said it was my fault.

I was sexually harassed. Oh god, look at this. She's unwaking my sub-album. Yeah. So then Jackie turns around. She's like, wait, she got a no-ship because it was just like, oh god, that's bad. Oh god. Oh god, that's really bad. They're all fucking monsters. I mean, even Teresa who is on Gen's team, I was just telling you I got it and all of the time. So Jack, Jack, he's like maybe I need to see it up close.

Hold on a second. So Jack, it gets up. Oh, Jack is already over here and she goes like this. She just walks by, she goes. Ah! Just like a drive by a stairs. Like, excuse me, I have to walk to another side of the party right now, and now I'm walking back to where originally started.

Thank you. They are so mean. I'm hilarious. I'm being literally saying, that's actually what Jen said. She goes, that's so mean. That's just so mean. It is mean, but also kind of funny, I'm sorry. It's like in the Brady bench when the football comes

and like hits Marsha, yeah. It's like, oh my nose. But it's like if you paused it, it's just like still right there in the football. You know, poor Jen, like that thing didn't heal well. Yeah, it's not great. But it's temporary. It healed later. Okay, everybody who feels sad, don't worry.

I don't know if it healed later, but something changed. She got it redone, did she get it redone? She looks right now, don't worry about it. We're being mean to pass Jen, not current Jen. We're being mean to swelling and noses that look like boots, you know? Pass Jen, past Gen. You can be mean to people in the past, just not currently. Currently I support everything.

You go, girl. So, Marge is like, oh my God, I gotta see it up close. So she goes and kind of looks too. And then Gen's like, hi, you see me? Cause I'm here. So, Gen of Returns, the Theresa is like, how am I supposed to act when they all just walk by like that? And Teresa goes, who walk by you? It's like Teresa, do not see people with camera crews walking by, stopping in steering

Jennifer's face and continuing to walk by. Ah, who walk by? Blink, blink, blink, blink. So you didn't see it, Teresa? I mean, obviously I found that this, there was still mad at me when she posted that thing on Instagram. And I read that smart, just still mad at me when she didn't fight me. She was a pride bother. But we're Jackie.

I thought we were going to let baggons be baggons. You want to talk to Jackie? Only get Jackie. Jackie, no stop, won't you? Yankee. Hey, she wants to say hi. So she goes, she pulls Jackie of all people and just basically forces them to like talk.

It's like when kids get into a fight, you know? So, so, Jen's like, I am out of my paper. I really thought that last time we saw each other and I tried to turn your best friend against you that we ended on a good note. I would love if you could just tell me why you're so madame, maybe I can fix it, baby.

Well, you know, Marge is a very good friend of mine and you really tried to concontestory the break us up. And then we see a clip of Andy going, so Jen, you said that marriage was the source of the story about having been getting blowdots and gyms. And he's like got a foam finger, he loves this shit, you know. And then so now Jen, she's doing her whole thing where she's like, I shouldn't have said it. I shouldn't have said it, Mr.

and I regret it. Do you know how it is? No one is the three of you against me, baby. I'm like, wasn't it like you and Dolores and Teresa against Jackie for like five years in a row? I know. But you know... Thank you to the Jackie Defender in the audience. Yeah, but you do feel bad, right? Because this is always a danger on housewives.

When you make the villain the victim. Yeah. And they're doing it on their show. They're coming in a way too strong. People who watch Bravo, I don't mean you, but the other ones. People like me do not remember shit. I don't remember what happened a month ago okay so I'm like why are they being to that mean to that lady who had that

horrible accident on her nose like that poor thing that women are so mean I mean it's just so cruel to do that to Jay Leno so but then right when you start... I got startled by the ladybug. By the way, this ladybug has... Oh, there's another one. Oh, look. Oh, okay, ma'am, you have to get off my laptop.

Okay. Oh, he doesn't like you messing with his laptop. It's on the space bar. It's literally walking on the space bar. It's very delohr. It's like, oh, this is a nice computer. How much you pay for this? Oh, okay. This is a nice computer. How much you pay for this? Oh, OK.

It's a little, this is adorable, actually. OK, ma'am, you're going to have to get off the space bar. OK, it's just walking around, just walking around. OK. So Jackie's like, but Jennifer, you did all of this to yourself. I mean, it's the things you say. It's like, but you got to understand. How many less you have class you girls, and then I'm just spending two reasons

and Laura's minister got for me at all. And she's like, oh my God, don't cry. I hate seeing people cry. Okay, we're best friends now. I'll support you two in the evening. I'm a forgive, I'm a forgive, I'm like, why are you? Do you want some great? It's gonna hurt my son, but you're getting Hudson's great.

She was like, I want to talk to her, but I don't have to apologize to her. She started with me, baby. Right, his Jackie takes Jen's hand because Jen is really faking this crying thing. So she's like, oh my God, please don't cry. And Marge is like, oh my God, they've got their hands.

I'm dragging Jackie out of that conversation. This is not going to happen. So Marge gets over there and Jo And Margin's like, oh my God, they've got their hands. I'm dragging Jackie out of that conversation. This is not gonna happen. So Margin gets over there and Jopani knows like, like a woolly buffalow, like, so much. That's my scene. Get out of my scene, Jop. So she's like, yeah, I shouldn't have to apologize to Margin.

She's like, well, hello, I'm right here. She's, well, I just have to con Jackie. Why is she mad at me? And Margin's like, you know what? I'm right here. She's, well, I was just asking Jackie, why she's mad at me. And Marjord is like, you know what? I was a little shocked. I mean, you called me a snake in the crib. You're called like a sea of bubbles. She's like, you know what?

You just don't know when to stop. I think you're unhappy. She's, I've got it. That's your truth. That's your truth. I think that's unhappy. She's, I've got it. That's your truth. That's your truth. I think that's your truth. Okay, that's your truth. You know how I could feel and blessed.

I love my husband. I love my husband. He's a lot of dirty things that I never thought would have happened before. I met a man having a man having a man having a nag me. I don't know what I'm saying anymore, but he doesn't laugh at me. He's saying, I never thought I would have all of this without a husband nagging me about the bell. Oh yeah.

So she's like, I'm happy, I'm rich, basically. And Marge is like, it's not about the fucking money, Jennifer. Do you have pink leopard wallpaper and you kitchen? You don't. So it's about the wallpaper. It's about the wallpaper. It's about the wallpaper. So Jennifer just looks confused.

But he means it's not about the money. And Jennifer, where do you never want to say to Jennifer, like it literally does not compute for her? So she's like, but it is about him letting me do whatever I can to be happy for the kids. And she's like, oh, or it's about him doing whatever he can to make up for the mistakes he's speaking the past So Margaret's like

That would be the to be continued. We can just say to be continued right there because you know, it's like So Jeff is yeah, just jealous. Oh, you want me to okay? We're gonna keep going with this. Okay. We're gonna do this So she's like as March March does walk away like Like she starts to walk, but they keep walking away from each other and then circling each other, like a jersey, like it's over, right? Oh, it's not over, yeah. So she's circling and the guys are all watching, like, look at that, Bully Z Brothers or whatever.

And then March has it separated. Like today is about embarrassing Louie. In four weeks. We will embarrass them. Well, yeah. Okay, let's spread it out. But she's the saver, we're just going to accelerate that timetable. She goes, she's like, you're not being honest.

And Jennifer is like, I didn't know about my honest saver, but she's Jennifer. We all know. Okay. She goes, well, everyone's got skeleton, the fucking closet. Then like cut to Teresa, like running up to her closet and spiting, oh my God, this is skeleton in here. I thought John took all his stuff.

Bling, bling, bling. So she's like, you talk about everyone else's skeletons, but John, you attacked me from the very beginning. And I was like, Marge, this is too much right now. You are being horrible, this is fucking much right now. You are being horrible. This is fucking terrible. You need to stop it. And then we see a clip of Jen going...

The way she met her husband is very taboo. It felt very shameless to me. And then... You know what, Margaret? You're used to an environment of cheating. Your mother fucked around for 19 years, Margaret. I'm making you. I can't relate to people who have a fuzz with married people.

Sexual harassment, you like it. It's like, oh, damn. Jennifer's like terrible. Like, oh, damn. I almost was on your side, but damn those clips will get you every time. So Margaret's like, you chastise me, she's like, what because you're so vocal about it?

And she goes, you're not honest. I'm being honest, you can't take hell on as I am, baby. And then Marge is like, all right, you're going to keep pushing me. You always say Bill is the best. But listen, he hadn't a fair, and everyone knows it. And that's why he left his last job. And Janges goes. Her tongue just sticks on the corner of her mouth like a placeholder like. And Margaret goes, yeah, her marriage isn't as perfect as she says it

is. Okay, Bill hadn an affair with the office manager for two years and Jennifer was like, she's not an office manager, she's a pharmaceutical rep. You fucking idiot. Get your factory. Get your factory. Get your factory. Get your factory.

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