Watch What Crappens - RHONJ Live in NYC: Screwy Luis With Margaret Josephs

Episode Date: May 12, 2023

We're live at The Town Hall in NYC for this Real Housewives of New Jersey recap and joined by the fabulous @therealMargaretJosephs herself! Join us for goss, laughs, and some really insane Lu...is faces. No court reporters allowed. For bonus episodes and video recaps, join Patreon at patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens Tour Dates: https://www.watchwhatcrappens.com/2023-cheater-brand-tour/See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Hey, Prime members, you can listen to watch what crap ends at free on Amazon Music. Download the app today. This episode is sponsored by Uber1. We've all used Uber for rides, and I love using UberEats for food delivery. Okay, hello. I mean, I kind of live off of it. But have you ever heard about Uber1? Uber1 is a membership that helps you save on Uber and UberEats. With an Uber-1 membership, you get exclusive member perks, like up to 10% off UberEats and a $0 delivery fee on eligible orders. It just makes sense. I'm always getting Uberes.
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Starting point is 00:02:28 Real to be back in New York. I look here for 10 years. This is my city. It is great. We love the New York shows. My, my family is here. My parents are here. My cousin Melissa is here. Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God.
Starting point is 00:02:45 Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God.
Starting point is 00:02:53 Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God.
Starting point is 00:03:01 Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God. It is so nice to be back in a place where I can sexually harass people again. Oh, forget about it. Walking out of that hotel room this morning and just saying, Nice ass! Nice fucking ass! God, that felt amazing. Thank you.
Starting point is 00:03:18 Oh my God. Yeah, we had a very fun day today. We went to lunch at a place called Hillsstone. Yeah. Yeah. And- I don't like either of those things though. I don't know who named that. I don't like Hills and I don't like stones.
Starting point is 00:03:35 Yeah. It's a branding issue. We sat between two celebrities. On our left was Sierra. Yeah. And not the summer house Sierra. The singer. The singer Sierra. And by the way, they did not see her.
Starting point is 00:03:53 They did not see Sierra. They were like, you have to wait. Like, she was standing at a high top and we were seated and I was like, is this allowed? Should we let Sierra sit down? Fucking New York City. I love this city. They're like, no, sorry. And the other celebrity sitting just to the right of us was someone who works at TJMX Corporate.
Starting point is 00:04:15 Home. Home of goods. Home of goods. This guy was so fucking hot. Oh my god, both of us, huh? He was such a lovely man And I was like what what an honor that we get to see it but but between someone from the world of home goods and Sierra the singer Only in New York. We barely cared about Sierra after we met this guy
Starting point is 00:04:37 I Mean how hot is a hot guy and also he was asking what we do and we're like oh, we do this stupid thing You know we were telling him and he goes oh, I do this stupid thing, you know, we were telling him. And he goes, oh, I love Bravo. I watch it with my wife all the time. And any man. That's right. He said, any man who says that he's showing up to your show
Starting point is 00:04:56 and doesn't watch it with his life is a fucking liar. That's right. And Sierra added nothing to that, but I know she felt the same way. And Sierra added nothing to that, but I know she felt the same way. So, we're back in Broadway, you know, right? Which is my dream. Which should probably have died a long time ago, it hasn't. So yesterday on the plane, I watched Matilda the musical.
Starting point is 00:05:22 Have you seen this on Netflix? I was literally sobbing on the plane. OK, and you know the plane, I'm a big guy. The plane, the scenes are very skinny anyway. I'm half onto another person, this older man. It starts like, it's like, baby is singing. I started sobbing in this fucking thing. I've never seen Matilda.
Starting point is 00:05:43 I didn't know what a beautiful story it was. I'm gonna cry right now telling you. By the end of this flight, tears were squirting out of me. I didn't know I could feel. I think I was crying mostly because I can still feel things. I was like, oh my god, I'm alive! I'm alive! But I walked off that plane and I was like, my life is a miracle. Fuck with me, bring it to me. I've been skipping ever since. Please go see that. Now, one thing we have to apologize for is the last time we were here was the crappy awards.
Starting point is 00:06:18 It was the Golden Crappies. Yes. It was the Golden Crappies. Oh my God, was anyone out? Was anyone here there that night? Oh. It's crazy fun. What an amazing night.
Starting point is 00:06:28 Right to you over there. Hi, handsome. What a fun night. So, but that was a lot of like celebs and like, bravo liberties and stuff like that. And we felt really bad coming here and not having that tonight. So thank you for still being here.
Starting point is 00:06:42 Thank you for nobody's here. No one's gonna come here. We don't have any celebrities. Unfortunately, there's no one here that's going to possibly like walk out on stage. I know it's so. There will be no one whatsoever. I mean, we could have at least emailed somebody.
Starting point is 00:06:57 I wish there was someone from New Jersey here. Oh. Oh. Oh. That's your cue. That's your cue. That's your cue. That's a sick microphone, Chess. That's a sick microphone. That's a sick microphone, Chess.
Starting point is 00:07:08 That's a sick microphone, Chess. That's a sick microphone, Chess. That's a sick microphone, Chess. That's a sick microphone, Chess. That's a sick microphone, Chess. That's a sick microphone, Chess. That's a sick microphone, Chess. That's a sick microphone, Chess.
Starting point is 00:07:16 That's a sick microphone, Chess. That's a sick microphone, Chess. That's a sick microphone, Chess. That's a sick microphone, Chess. That's a sick microphone, Chess. That's a sick microphone, Chess. That's a sick microphone, Chess. That's a sick microphone, Chess.
Starting point is 00:07:24 That's a sick microphone, Chess. That's a sick microphone, Chess. That's a sick microphone, Chess. That's a sick microphone,, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, two fabulous men. Oh, yeah, we're going to stand out. Did you like that very professional cue? We gave you. Yes, very professional. Hello. Hello. So now this is a tricky one, Marge, because what are we allowed to even talk to? Your cast is fucking crazy, and your fans are fucking crazy.
Starting point is 00:07:57 I know. The tree stumps are crazy. Yeah, no, that is for sure. I got to be on good behavior. I got to be on good behavior. Too late. I was kidding. I'm getting it from every angle. That was for Joe. that is for sure. I got to be on good behavior. I got to be on good behavior. Too late. I was kidding. I'm getting it from every angle.
Starting point is 00:08:07 That was for Joe. That was for Joe. That was for Joan Rivers. I mean, you know. That was for Joe. Joan Rivers. OK, listen, don't get mad at us. She's going to put in an arsenal, OK?
Starting point is 00:08:21 No, but bring it on. She's got a giant, I'm talking in your voice right now, for no reason. I love it. I love it in an arsenal, okay? No, but, bring it on. She's got a giant, I'm like talking in your voice right now for no reason. I love it, I love it. Notice that I racked, never went to war with me. All right, I've got the awesome. I've got the awesome. Wow, Margaret, so what a season for you.
Starting point is 00:08:37 So how do you feel about the season so far? It's a little rough, it's a little rough for the March. They're trying to kill me. Yeah. They want me, they're taking me down, and full swoop attempted attempt to take down attempt to take out They're trying They are coming they're coming at you with such odd things and I think it's really hard to fight When you don't really understand the argument. I don't think they really understand the argument on this
Starting point is 00:09:03 So and I would imagine that that's very difficult to fight against. I mean, it's... Well, yeah. I think it's a little hard for me. You know, I love it. These are, you know, my friends. I try and, but I don't understand where it's coming from. We're talking about an ex-friend of mine a lot,
Starting point is 00:09:19 which I think is kind of funny. Let's just say her name, Laura. It was Laura. It was good. Laura, let's just say her name, Laura. With Laura. Boop. Laura, boo. So was Laura always a slower or what's the deal with Laura? You know, it's funny because we were friends. I hope you asked when we were younger, much younger,
Starting point is 00:09:37 that we didn't see each other for a very long time. Prior to me getting on the show, we saw each other in the Hamptons. I was in a nice rental with Joe before I was on the show. She was in a dump. And she saw, no. And I, you know. She had me used house.
Starting point is 00:09:53 And you know what? You know what? Some people, it's on the mom's, you just living a dump. No, it's okay. No, it wasn't. She wasn't living there. It was a little dumpy motel. And.
Starting point is 00:10:00 It's all right. No. And I took her back in. She's like, oh, let's get together. Buh, buh, buh, buh. And then she moved out of our hometown in May, a pack, New York, which was great. Mayopak.
Starting point is 00:10:13 I'm going to call it. We got some Mayopak. She moved to New Jersey. No, and I really did love her. I loved her to be around. I thought her and her husband were great. She was estranged from her family, so she spent every holiday with me and my family.
Starting point is 00:10:27 I know you guys, I don't bring my kids on the show. Yes, they do love me. I don't want everyone's like, you don't bring your kids. That's a tough. And I'm just like, I keep them very private. So I really did enjoy being around her. But I did see certain things that were happening. Like, I took her to my
Starting point is 00:10:45 plastic surgeons. A good friend shares their plastic surgery. There we go. Someone's showing up with your face and dinner. She should be happy. She should be happy because, you know what, she could have wandered to batoniel's talks, plastic surgeon. You know, those are things you share with your very good friends. Yes. Not me. These tips are the only share with your very good friends. Yes. Not me, these tips are the only tips that you're gonna see. You know, we?
Starting point is 00:11:09 I don't want these tips on anybody else. Exactly. You know, women do that with each other, but certain things, I brought her to filming tapings. She said, you know, I always wanted to be on TV. I go, but you're a court reporter. And I was like, I didn't see you. You got a court reporter. I guess. Oh, my God.
Starting point is 00:11:27 Of course, she's not a rougher. Well, this meant she's running to, well, how is it that she doesn't have a written record of any of the stuff that happens? That's exactly right. I'm not doing a very good job. She's all this room. I wasn't writing anything to him.
Starting point is 00:11:37 But I said, listen, I want everybody to have the opportunity. I got her an interview. She did, you know, I thought she did great. I dressed her up. I thought it was great. She, you know, I helped her pick her up. I helped her pick her up.
Starting point is 00:11:50 What's the per-quart TV? You know, I thought she, I, she had a great interview. They didn't pick her. I couldn't help it. The next year, it's hard to get on Judd Judy's good side. Yeah, see you. Yeah. It was, it was rough.
Starting point is 00:12:02 The next year, again, two years in a row, again, she said, I said, maybe it doesn't work out. You did very long extensions. You look like every other Italian girl on the show. This is where she twists the truth. This is where she twists the truth. Everybody can't be the same. So she's saying out there, I said, I
Starting point is 00:12:21 want her to look like me. I said, no, I said said just bring something different to the show You know everybody can't be identical don't try and look like Melissa and Teresa Try and be yourself like maybe wear shorter hair do Yeah, she said like half big town Have a hook I have a hook. Have a hook. That was my suggestion.
Starting point is 00:12:45 Yeah, God, I got my, God, I got my, God, I got my, God. She took that as like I said, try and look like me. That's not what I said. So she said that anyway. So she got pissed at you for that? She got pissed at you. And obviously, now I'm hearing it, upset her, I said these things.
Starting point is 00:13:00 I couldn't get her on. Then, I do have these famous Christmas parties, I'm not gonna lie. And we were arguing by then, and I shunned her from Christmas. Oh, I can't. I shunned her from Christmas. But she had the window like an urchin. Yeah. Please. That's a lot of people that resent on Christmas.
Starting point is 00:13:22 I mean, that girl has like, oh, she has her own families. That's a lot of fun. I'm going to, I'm going to shut this bit from Christmas now. We'll make it a yearly tradition for Laura. And low and behold, February 27th, I have the date of 2022. Good. I get the call. I smell.
Starting point is 00:13:39 Yeah, I get the call that she has met with Teresa. Uh-oh. And Jennifer at Jennifer's house to trash talk us and say all these things to create drama to try and get on the show. Wow. And it didn't work. No, it didn't.
Starting point is 00:13:55 It's so great. I love the people. The Jersey producers have learned the thirstiest front. There's no thirstier friend of than a Jersey friend. Do you remember that lady Penny from years ago? I mean, the Kim D's, the Collin Deloitte, the lawyer who was coming for a Teresa, the Kim Jesus, the Kim D's. All the Kim D's we love our Kim D, but the Kim D's like the top of that pile for sure,
Starting point is 00:14:21 but still a pile. There are. So, Rosanna and Rosanna. Rosanna, Rosanna, yes. So she just, and I found out, and I became, I was like, what is going on here? So I did. I sent a group text message to anybody I've ever introduced her to, and that was about 100 people.
Starting point is 00:14:39 And it's true, and I put her on it, and I basically said she was trying to undermine my career. Yeah. I don't know why I brought her into this group, but if she decided she was associated with her, let them know that she's a snake in a beast. Let the record stand. Let the snake in a beast. That's better. You're like, I'm not going to ruin my Christmas party over this.
Starting point is 00:15:03 I'm not going to ruin... I'm not getting ready to have any friends. No, I'm not going to ruin my Christmas party over this. I'm not going to ruin... I'm not getting ready to have any friends. No, I'm not going to get... But that's the way I felt. But I was up front. It's not like I didn't put her on the text message. She was the most glamorous court reporter in the entire... She did?
Starting point is 00:15:18 ...of the York State legal system. No, she definitely is the most glamorous, shortest court reporter in the legal system that I've ever seen. She types on spec. Okay. So, another reason you're in trouble is because on the after show, I'm in a lot of trouble. On the after show, Paul from Ireland, in case you didn't know. Hey, welcome to my Ireland party after Ireland week. Like, do we owe Ireland some money?
Starting point is 00:15:44 What the fuck is going on? A lot of Ireland. So Paul. So Paul. Love you, Dolores. So Paul, you said that Dolores and Paul aren't even married. And that has been that little clip. I don't watch you after, Sean.
Starting point is 00:15:57 Sorry, I put it in enough time. But that clip has been, how do you mind you up? That clip has literally been everywhere. Is Dolores pissed at you? Or she knew ahead of time I was my job. That clip has literally been everywhere. Is Dolores pissed at you? Or, she knew ahead of time, I was set up. This is, it was a set up that was done on the after show. No, no.
Starting point is 00:16:13 I can Laura. Laura, look how wig. Now notice, everybody did the after show in pairs. Yes. Tell her to say, she's writing the cute cards. The cute cards are all in short hands. Yes, everybody did the after-show in pairs. Marge is there alone with the producer.
Starting point is 00:16:33 And they ask you questions. And I'm there alone. And the producer says to me, of course, they don't show her asking me. And they said, oh, Dolores and Pauley aren't engaged. Another cast member, I'm not throwing the person under the bus, said, the reason is Pauley's still married. And I go, I make the face because they show me making the face and everyone's like, Margaret's smirking. And I was like, I I go who told you that and they say the cast member who
Starting point is 00:17:07 I'm not throwing under the bus and no I'm not doing it I won't do it it was Ziggy Flicker I'm not doing it no that's not I'm not gonna do it because she got shipped from Delores already oh that's the one to be afraid. Teresa is the one that we think we're afraid of. Yeah, Dolores, like she gets mad at you and she gets upset. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:17:33 No, so then I said, and they go, so is Paul married? And I answer, you see my answer, and I go, well, he's not divorced. That's the way I answered the question. So you see, I'm clearly answering your question. I go, well, he's not divorced. That's the way I answered the question. So you see, I'm clearly answering your question. I go, well, he's not divorced. Because I didn't know to say, you know, when I was confronted. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:17:53 You know, I'm not a liar. Or, you know, I'm not going to fabricate something. But I was on the spot. And he gives a shit. He's separated. Why would that be a secret? If he's separated, he's obviously living with someone else. He's separated for many years. him and Dolores are very happy
Starting point is 00:18:06 They're an amazing couple they live together. It's a technicality And that's really what it is. It's not a big deal But it was so taken at a context. I'm blessed on page six Margaret Joseph You know says Paulie's not divorced. I was like oh my God, I woke up to a shit storm. Oh my God, yeah. Like Margaret's revealing other people's dirty laundry. Margaret says, I was like, I'm gonna knock it out of the bed. No, no, no, no, no.
Starting point is 00:18:35 No, I'm glad he's not out of bed because you're here with us? No, of course, that's why I got out of the bed. Well, I've a question. That's a question for you too. How do you deal with these, with everybody being so crazy like that? Because especially on Jersey, like I make the joke all the time
Starting point is 00:18:49 that that's the only housewives show that people fight online and they're like, oh yeah, well, Teresa's a slut. Oh, and by the way, I went to your page, your baby's fucking ugly too. I've got it all the time. I mean, these people fight Jersey, man. Jersey people go hard in the pain. You know?
Starting point is 00:19:06 They do. Jersey fans, they're passionate, but they fight hard. I mean, they're brutal. Do you think, I have a question. Is Sabrina from Teneflie, everyone to come on the show? Sabrina, Sabrina from Teneflie. Sabrina from Teneflie. Have you gotten an official endorsement?
Starting point is 00:19:25 endorsement? Yes, endorsement. I got endorsements, babe. Have you received an official endorsement from Snickers Creamer yet? No. And by the way, I think we should all write to a coffee mate. Why I don't have an endorsement from coffee mate
Starting point is 00:19:42 is beyond me. No one has had more coffee made than me. I have, I don't care what I'm saying. There's gotta be someone here who works at coffee and may someone get on top of this. I'm calling, isn't it? It is. It is.
Starting point is 00:19:53 It is. It is. It is. It is. It is. It is. It is. It is.
Starting point is 00:20:01 It is. It is. It is. It is. It is. It is. It is. And that actually they've a new flavoring now the pop tart wine that Joe want me the pop tart one I think it's in pop I don't know what these people want for me They've never been so popular ever year after year a huge influencer now, but you know before we let you go first of all Housie mother Mark senior
Starting point is 00:20:20 I really should have brought senior I didn't tell her I was coming I really should have brought senior I didn't tell her I was coming Oh, he's gonna be pissed. She's gonna hit the roof. She's gonna be pissed She is she with is she with joby right now? Well, that'll be another rumor tomorrow I left her home with joby first now Lexi sleeping with joby. Well, listen I did say that's that's the other room Here tonight Lexi is here tonight by the way. Lexi is here and fucking stunning.
Starting point is 00:20:47 And I have to officially once again and clear up the rumor that I started based off of literally nothing. I went on the podcast and decided to announce that Lexi was dating the points guy. Who was a gay man? It's a gay man. So.
Starting point is 00:21:02 My weight watcher is counselor, Janelle. But yeah, I did say on the show when you were like, you know what, she's my best friend. We've been together forever. She was there with my children. She did that. She's in my house now because little knee now. And I was like, after a scandal,
Starting point is 00:21:17 but I don't trust that bitch. Yeah, okay. So I just have to say upfront, and be honest to your face, the art shit talker, sorry Lexi. Sorry Lexi. No, it's okay. Lexi has the best, also the best accent on Bravo, which is both the perfect combination of New Jersey and British, which doesn't make any sense.
Starting point is 00:21:35 She came to the day and she said, people today will make and fool my accent. I believe, I can't believe what people will say. You know about my accent. Well, we obviously love you. Yes, Margaret. Thank you so much. Thank you so much, Margaret. And thanks for having me.
Starting point is 00:21:52 Ladies and gentlemen, Margaret Joseph's. Love you guys. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you so much. If you're hiring, you know what it's like to deal with economic uncertainty, and now more than ever, it's really important to hire the right people faster and more efficiently because you gotta keep the overall cost down. And thankfully, there's a hiring partner who's focused on you and your needs. And that is Zippercrooter. From pricing to technology, everything that Zippercrooter does is for
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Starting point is 00:23:05 crap ins. Again that zippercruiter.com slash C-R-A-P-P-E-N-S. Zipper Cruder the smartest way to hire. I'm going to say something scandalous running. Go on. Plants are meat. And not only are they meat, they're delicious, especially if they're from impossible foods. They taste like beef. Exactly. Impossible is making meat history this summer. Yeah, they are. Summer of Impossible. I am so excited to be spending time cooking my
Starting point is 00:23:37 summer foods, all that good stuff, and guess what? We can use impossible sausages, impossible brats. I mean, it's gonna be a great summer for impossible foods. Impossible beef is made from plants and 19 grams of protein per serving, and it's better for the planet. And it's meat. Plant meat. Correct.
Starting point is 00:23:53 So if you're looking for something to grab for your grill, grab some impossible beef. Summer of impossible. Start making meat history today. Just head over to the meat aisle at your local grocery store, grab some impossible beef or patties and get grilling. Shortest court reporter in history, bitch!
Starting point is 00:24:14 I can't report a bitch, Laura. I have to say, you know, she came when she got here, she was like, okay, listen, I can't talk about anything. You know, it's a very stressful season. We're not supposed to be at talking about that. I said, okay, well, you know, it'll be fine. We don't have to talk about anything. And then look, she just comes up, she just like, literally, like, brings a wheelbarrow.
Starting point is 00:24:38 I dumps it. That stupid bitch, Laura, is shorting the court report and has hair extensions that I bought from her because her family hates her. Anyway, I can't talk about it. I can't talk about it. Go listen to their podcast, too. They have a great podcast.
Starting point is 00:24:53 Yes. Also, real housewives of Rewind, Sue Funk is here. Hi, Sue. So check out that show as well. We love you. OK. And she designer, Jessica. I can't.
Starting point is 00:25:03 I don't. There's no reason to have a code on this. There's no, there's nothing in here. It's a Bravo note. Nobody is going to steal my Bravo notes. You're stepping on my cord. Oh, well, Kitcha, there we go. Sorry about that. This is my space. All right. Welcome to Watch For Us. What's the podcast about all that crap on Bravo? We just love to talk about. Get your fucking core that I've got them! You're gonna let your get yourself.
Starting point is 00:25:31 Oh my god, I wish. We're so professional at all times. Alright. Wow. Let's get to it. That was so exciting. Previously, I'm the real housewives of New Jersey. How me put this wind dress on so I can go to a lunch at night and anyway about nothing
Starting point is 00:25:56 about me. I've got a good girl married to no bodies and none of my friends is gonna meet her, not in. LAUGHTER Surprise! Hahahaha! For me, I'm getting married! And Mr. Dance Like You Get Married, bitch! It's not anything. It's not even watching them. Cause you got a sister in law fighting with a sister.
Starting point is 00:26:32 And then you got a proper fight with a brother. And then remind me of my brother. And my brother don't talk to me no more. I just can't drink her even there. Deloice! Hey Deloice, Deloice! Frankie's got his dream job, and I say, let's go celebrate! Okay, we'll go to restaurant, I'll wear a tanked up,
Starting point is 00:26:58 and I'm gonna spit everywhere, okay, and fuck Paulie! Frank! You can't say fuck Paulie. All right. I rode with Paulie in the same car to a grocery store once. And I'm gonna be true to him for fucking over. That's how relationships based on transportation work, Frank.
Starting point is 00:27:22 Okay. Yeah, but sometimes I just want it to be us. You know, I just want us to be back to law. So, being a fooder and having a tire store and a concierge service and a cab company, that ain't enough of a storyline. So I'm going to adopt a kid on camera. A must he called me a rat, in which case, fuck that kid. Hey Bill, Bill. We got all these shruggles, Bill.
Starting point is 00:27:55 Our kids want to be love therapists. You won't come out of the pool house. And the back hair's clogging up the tail of Bill. We got to go see Dr. Judy when you see Dr clogging up the toilet bill. We gotta go see Dr. Judy when you see Dr. Judy with me bill. Dr. Judy. Mmm. Mmm.
Starting point is 00:28:11 Mmm. Mmm. Mmm. Mmm. Mmm. Hello, Bill. This is Dr. Judy. Mmm.
Starting point is 00:28:19 Bill. Mmm. Excuse me, wait. Mmm. Bill. Mmm. Mmm. Mm. Bill. Mm. Excuse me, wait. Mm. Bill.
Starting point is 00:28:27 Mm. Mm. Do you want to talk about your feelings, Bill? Mm. Mm. Do you want to talk about your sex life, Bill? Mm. Do you want to talk about the love making you're doing, Bill?
Starting point is 00:28:43 Mm. Do you want to talk about anything that bothers me in disguise all the time? Come on, talk to me, baby! All right, you know what? You don't forgive, and you don't forget. And you're gonna have problems with your family, your entire life, okay? Shut up, Jen. I'm not talking to you.
Starting point is 00:29:00 You just shep up, drug addict. Shut up. Shut up. And sin. to just chef of truck addict, shut up, shut up. Hanson. Hanson. Oh. I know that there's a lot going on in the world of bravo, especially Scandaball, you know, and I know that people.
Starting point is 00:29:19 Yes. Scandaball, you guys. Love just rolling around in that shit. Okay. I'm not going to be a fan of you guys. I'm not going to be a fan of you guys. I'm not going to be a fan of you guys. I'm not going to be a fan of you guys. I'm not going to be a fan of you guys. I'm not going to be a fan of you guys. I'm not going to be a fan of you guys. I'm not going to be a fan of you guys. I'm not going to be a fan of you guys. I'm not going to be a fan of you guys. I'm not going to be a fan of you guys. I'm not going to be a fan of you guys. I'm not going to be a fan of you guys. I'm not going to be a fan of you guys. I'm not going to be a fan of you guys. I'm not going to be a fan of you guys. I'm not going to be a fan of you guys. I'm not going to be a fan of you guys. I'm not going to be a fan of you guys. I'm not going to be a fan of you guys. I'm not going to be a fan of you guys. I'm not going to be a fan of you guys. I'm not going to be a fan of you guys. I'm not going to be a fan of you guys. I'm not going to be a fan of you guys. I'm not going to be a fan of you guys. I'm not going to be a fan of you guys. I'm not going to be a fan of you guys. I'm not going to be a fan of you guys. I'm not going to be a fan of you guys. I'm not going to be a fan of you guys. I'm not going to be a fan of you I think the biggest reveal on that show this week was Katie's mother came. I was like Katie's mother. Katie's mother came out to play this week. And I was like, that's where Katie gets it. And I hate quoting Raquel, because Raquel says that.
Starting point is 00:30:00 She's like, I see where she gets it now. But Katie's mother being like, you hurt me. Like, oh my God, mad on. I actually have a piece of scandal information that happened on my Instagram like two hours ago. It's small, but it was made me happy. So on the show, you may have noticed that Tom Tandval was like, I'm doing I love Beyonce.
Starting point is 00:30:24 Because Ariana and Logan listen to Beyonce all the time and Tandeval is claiming that he likes Beyonce too. Well Logan wrote on my Instagram and he said, this guy gets annoyed when we watch Beyonce, he can't name one song off of Renaissance by... BYE! BYE! There! Singing crazy and love off key,
Starting point is 00:30:47 and a dingy half-sold bar does not make you a Beyonce fan, Tom. No, no, no. You imagine, like, Beyonce hasn't had to take enough shit. Don't bring Beyonce into this scandal, all. Uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh. Dude, if you like to put a lightning bolt necklace on it. Uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, uh's it. Well, all of those of you who are new here, this will be 10 hours. I don't give a fuck what your union says. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:31:31 Someone said, I'm gonna go ahead and say it. Ronnie looks like Fuda. Yeah. Fuda. No. My reply was I curse your entire fucking family. Yes. How dare you. How dare you? How. Yes. How dare you.
Starting point is 00:31:45 How dare you. How dare you. How dare you. So, food is like, you got, she's like, you got to eat, you got to eat, she's another, she's another, come on honey, what do you want? What do you want to eat?
Starting point is 00:31:58 What do you want? She's like, fooda, fooda, fooda, fooda. And then we see something really exciting happening at Melissa's house. She's tossing a berry into her mouth. The frozen grape. That's an old way of watching trick, too.
Starting point is 00:32:13 Speaking of fucking point skies. These fucking weight watchers, people, I can't. First of all, why doesn't Oprah have to do it? Like, I love Oprah. I listen to all of her stuff, and I'm like, you don't have to do it? Like, I love Oprah. I listen to all of her stuff and I'm like, you don't have to do it. Why am I counting this shit? You own this now. And then they come out with articles like,
Starting point is 00:32:31 freeze your grapes. They're just like M&Ms. M&Ms are not frozen. And a frozen grape is nothing like a fucking M&M. It's like a little hard piece of not sweet enough natural shit. Not want that. Like, I talk literally nothing like an M&M. It's nothing like an M&M. Like, I'm talking literally nothing like an Eminem. It's nothing like an Eminem. The wait watcher, they're liars.
Starting point is 00:32:48 It's a lying copy that I'm telling you right now. I'm a lifetime member, so I can say that shit. Yep. So now we go over to Guess Who to Margaret. We're going to be going over to Margaret. This guy brought his golden crappy. I love you. Thank you for bringing that.
Starting point is 00:33:02 Thank you for bringing that. Thank you. I love you. Be careful. I have a feeling you're going gonna get dragged out of here in about 20 minutes We got some of the Jersey guys back there ready Frank's back there like So we go over to Margaret's house Marley and me. Well, you help me a little bit. Please him. If you help me and Marlini wonderful Marlini who we love Would you help me a little bit please? Would you help me, Marlini?
Starting point is 00:33:23 Wonderful Marlini who we love. Woo! She's like, oh, is the food for me? And she's like, no, Marlini, stop it. Okay, we have people coming over. We'll put this in some Marlini comedy average. Serve the fucking food. I mean, what are you dressing up in the Oscars?
Starting point is 00:33:36 So what? We got Raggedy Ann and Raggedy Ann coming over. Come on, hurry up. Oh, yeah. What are you going to the Oscars? So to what you're wearing your fancy pink tank top? Because Marlene is in her like sparkly shirt. She's like fucking love Marlene. She's like, yeah. So she's like, do the shrimp salad, just do that.
Starting point is 00:33:56 So then Marlene here comes over, she's like, honey, whoa. Oh, you. Margie. And she hugs Marlene, it's cute, it's wonderful. And then Mar just like, ma, guess what? Jennifer Festlis coming over with her mother and her mother's twin sister. And it crazy, like you, ma.
Starting point is 00:34:13 MAH! Kasi and Mazi. Kasi and Mazi. The best thing to fucking ever happen to this show? I'm like, it's literally like Ellen Green put on a wig and multiply it herself. And then showed up at Marge's house. And Wigs from like anything goes, you know, or like all of her twists, all of her twists. She's like, I'm sick of duetting with amateurs, I'm suddenly seeing more, so I clone myself
Starting point is 00:34:43 and we're gonna sing it together. Now those are court reporters I want to see on this chat. What did you say to her, honey? How did she feel about that? Yeah, she would get involved. Ah, that was a good one. Good point prosecution, good one. You like, I'm calling up my sister, hold on. I'm just gonna go ahead and perspoyal or not guilty. Not guilty, I pay. Hey, babs, hey babs, it's your old friend guess what? Oh great, great case we're doing right now.
Starting point is 00:35:05 Right, that high. Massey says hi. She says I love you, Bob Ross. Say hi to James for us. Hi, she says hi to. I'm writing a cast. He says hi to you. You go ahead. Okay, hold on one second.
Starting point is 00:35:17 Guilty of manslaughter. Okay, yes. What were you saying? Right, sorry. So, uh, Fessler is one of my favorite crazies, too. People, you know, she's getting so flamethrower. Love, Jen, Fesler. Oh!
Starting point is 00:35:32 Jen Fesler has serious, psychotic energy, ooh, coursing through her veins, her eyes, honey. She, ah, she has the energy. I'm telling you, I want to fuck Tony Soprano, that's what I did. Fucked him real good, honey. She, ah, she has the energy. I'm telling you, I want to fuck Tony Soprano. That's what I did. Fucked him real good, girls. She has the energy of someone who's been sitting on that story for 20 years,
Starting point is 00:35:53 and has been waiting for the platform. It's time. My moment is now. My, Kazy, fuck, Uncle June, you're two. There, I said it. Only in Jersey do people brag about fucking Tony Suprad. Literally never... RIP.
Starting point is 00:36:11 Uh, so, Fesler is like the cane for these two late. She's just like this, and the ladies are like holding on to her shoulder, is walking up. And she's like, come on, come on, come on, you can't have a look here while the sudden, come on, mom! Take it up! And she's like, come on, come on, come on, you can't have a look. Well, the sudden, come on, come on, come on. Take it up. My mom is an identical twin in case you couldn't tell. Her name is Marilyn. My aunt's name is Carolyn.
Starting point is 00:36:37 And they love being twins. To this day, they're 80 years old, and they love dressing it like you shouldn't have seen the two of them when they met Uncle Pooley. Let's just say. that was a night. Ma, come on, get off the curb, ma. De Carmelo's soprano complain about curves? Probably, and that's why Tony fucked me. On a curb.
Starting point is 00:36:57 Fucked him real good. So they go in and Massey's like, oh my God, looks just like my apartment, am I right? I'm kidding, what a gorgeous, gorgeous home. And, um, Mark's like, okay, this is my mother, okay? You're old, you're old, and you're old, so you're all gonna get along. All talk.
Starting point is 00:37:15 That's what they do to gay people. You all do it, and you know you do. Yeah. I have a gay friend. Oh, yeah. You guys should date. Yeah, I wish they know. We thought sex in the city episode,
Starting point is 00:37:25 or they made their gay friends meet, and they were just like, so Jennifer Fasler tells us, she's like, so they were born in Brooklyn, where they were best friends with Barbara Streisand. Yeah, I'm gonna put that in there. Barbara Streisand was like, I almost got through my entire professional life without this moment coming up. I'm so sorry.
Starting point is 00:37:47 These two jokers, you sent me Christmas cards every single year. I don't know how they got my address. These two are the reason Barbara Streisand was trying to hide that Malibu house for so long. The cause, the Streisand effect in the first place. Barbara Streisand doesn't have stage fright. She just doesn't want to see these two in the audience.
Starting point is 00:38:04 She's so my god, they're there again. She has Casad Mastra. She has Casad Mastra. By the way, love Casad Mastra. They knew Barbara Streisand. I fucked her. I fucked her real good. Years later.
Starting point is 00:38:17 You want to talk about soprano? She was, by the time I was done with her. People, people who fuck sopranos are the luckiest people in the world. It's just the way we were. I'm a laughing America. So Barbara would come to the house and her grandma would play the piano and Barbara Streisent would sing and I had the least entertaining childhood of anybody I've ever known. I was so jealous of this story
Starting point is 00:38:52 And then we see a picture and it's a picture of the twins, but not with Barbara Streisand No, I was like you guys can photoshoot some shit in here Why are you showing it? You think we're just not gonna notice that Barbara Streisand's not in that picture? Just take something from like Yentel or something, I'm gonna put it... Yentel? What's it called? Yentel. No, lentil is the modern version.
Starting point is 00:39:14 It's the kind of version. So Marilyn does, you know, I'm from the Northeast, I just want to say, obviously I'm from New York and... Marilyn. We know, say water water Mario so everyone's like I don't get it right Maryland does the exact sort of like Architectural digest review that you get in the Northeast, which is you know what this house doesn't have plates
Starting point is 00:39:44 That's how you know you're in New York or New Jersey. When people say things like that, this place, you know what this place doesn't have? A carpet. Yeah, it's no carpet here. You know if this place could use a window. This place could. Waiting tables here always say this, but every, you know you're in New York waiting tables. How was everything? Nothing's on the plate. And they go, could have been better. What? What? Was everything okay?
Starting point is 00:40:09 I mean, it could have been worse. It was fair. So, of course, Mark's like, hi, you want some ice coffee? That's what we do in this house. I've been in endorsements, okay. Snickers cream, man. So, Gabby's like, so this food are we able to eat this food? Are we gonna in this house? I mean endorsements, okay? Snickers cream, man. So, Cabbie's like, so this food, are we able to eat this food?
Starting point is 00:40:28 Now, are we gonna eat that food? Can we eat that food right here? What's this yellow? Is that for us? What's this yellow? What's this yellow? Well, what is that? You know what this could do?
Starting point is 00:40:36 Some blue. You know what I could do some blue? You know what? You know what? You know what we need here? Naphkins. Naphkins. Naphkins.
Starting point is 00:40:44 Naphkins. Naphkins. Naphkins. Naphkins. Naphkins. Naphkins. Naphkins. Naphkins. Naphkins. Naphkins. Naphkins. Naphkins. Naphkins. Naphkins. Naphkins. Naphkins. Naphkins. Naphkins. Naphkins. Naphkins. Naphkins. Naphkins. Naphkins. Naphkins. Naphkins. Naphkins. Naphkins. Naphkins. Naphkins. Naphkins. Naphkins. Naphkins. Naphkins. Naphkins. Naphkins. Naphkins. Naphkins. Naphkins. Naphkins. Naphkins. Naphkins. Naphkins. Naphkins. Naphkins. N me, it's an African. So it's coconut. They're very excited about the coconut. And so Margaret's like, okay, all right, this is very interesting. Okay, so do you guys live near each other? Do you guys live on top of each other? What's going on with you guys? Like, well, you know, 15 minutes of practice. Oh, okay, and your husband, so they get along, you know, and Kaz is like, yeah, they get along. I mean, her husband's what?
Starting point is 00:40:59 Like, 104 years old. It's like my sister, listen, you know, like, we're 15 minutes apart from each other. 104 years old. It's like my sister. Listen, you know, like, we're 15 minutes apart from each other. I came out first. It's just 15 minutes before, you know. She tried to join me. I kicked her back into the womb. Don't bring around a cloud of rain on my parade.
Starting point is 00:41:21 Let me tell you, you know what, Barbara loved? Nappkins always having that. Oh, she loves the napkin. I'll tell you, you know what Bob her loved? Nappkins, always having that. Oh, she loves the napkin, I'll tell you so much. We send her napkins every year for Christmas, she loves it. So, they're like, do you want to get married, Marge? What's with you? What's with your marriage story? She's like, no. I don't ever want to be with anyone 24 hours a day, you know? Which of course I totally get
Starting point is 00:41:45 that's my lifestyle choice as well. So thank you for being my hero. And Margaret's like, you know what, I'm married to a stage five clinger. Okay, he's such a clinger. Joe, get over here. Get over here. Why aren't you wearing your sea foam polo shoes?
Starting point is 00:41:58 Go back up, see us, take a shower and come back with a polo shirt. He's such a clinger, such a clinger. Joe, my shoulder's cold. He's like, thank you, Joe. Jesus. What have you been? God. So, the cast in Maserick, I get it. And Maserick's like, yeah, I get it. You know, I mean, there's so many slots out there. I'm gonna wipe right back. He didn't say that, did he? Somebody slot- You guys, sometimes when we're taking- It is true. It is true. She didn't say that did she? Somebody slept.
Starting point is 00:42:25 You guys sometimes when we're taking the news. It is true. It is true. Why would... What was I thinking? Does that sound like a line that she said? I just wrote, I see sluts on TV all the time. That's what I wrote that she said.
Starting point is 00:42:38 So now we get Fesler's backstory, which is like, my mother is Kooky and an extrovert. My father is very serious. They both remarried and there was divorce. That was a roller coaster. There's family on Long Island. I moved around a lot. Long Island, New Jersey to Long Island, New Jersey, and there were aunts, there were cousins,
Starting point is 00:42:55 there was Tony soprano, there was a lot of stuff going on. Here I am. Then they talk about Lexi Sanino and Marge Diner's like he's like a grandson. Lexi knows me 14 years. Oh, Marge is like, Lexi's not me 14 years. She breaks my company. She takes care of my husband. She's occasionally changed to the chart.
Starting point is 00:43:16 She's had that honor a couple of times. Jo just taught Nino to pee. He just said, go there. Not that far. Not that far. My favorite being seen of all time. And I don't know that there not that far my favorite being seen of all time And I don't know that there have been a lot of being scenes. They're having it. It was so cute So then Mazzie is like she's like so does everyone in your group get along and mark up
Starting point is 00:43:36 But let's not exaggerate okay, yeah, and Kazzie goes what was the nasty bitch in the group? Go ahead tell us who's the nasty bitch in the group? Go ahead, tell us. Who's the nasty bitch in the group? She's an immature, I tell you, that much. She's not even a court reporter. Can you believe it? Her name is Danielle. She's gone through something with her brother. No one really knows what it is.
Starting point is 00:43:56 But we try and ask them, and she starts crying. Every single time somebody else tries to talk, and then she starts crying about her brother. So I fucked him. I fucked him real good. I said put on a wife beer and get some tomato sauce on and I'll do you in the back. Oh.
Starting point is 00:44:13 So Cassie and Matthew are like, oh, it sounds like she's got issues, right? And Marge's like, oh, God, every time Melissa and Teresa talk about the problem, this girl starts crying and saying, oh my God, but about my problem, see that? I mean, it's all about her, it's all trauma, all the problem. This girl starts crying and saying, oh my god, but it bad my problem. See that. I mean, it's all about her. It's all trauma all the time. I can't with this girl. Scorson idiot.
Starting point is 00:44:32 Some of her was like, you know what? I felt sorry for her for one second and I was trying to cut it, but you know what? This girl attacked me. Okay, she attacked me. Okay. And festers like, oh, and it was just awkward when we're all together. Like the time I was in a restaurant with James Gandalfine, and the guy who plays Big Pussy, you know what I mean? Listen honey, sometimes with people it just doesn't work. Yes, sometimes it doesn't work. Like Matt says, lasagna. She's tried and tried.
Starting point is 00:45:02 What are you talking about, Bobbyshe Riseon? Loads my lasagna. Don't throw soggy meatballs in a spaghetti house, bitch. He's tried and tried. What are you talking about, Bobbys tries to end most of my lasagna. Don't throw soggy meatballs in a spaghetti house, bitch. So, Fessler's like, you know, they just talk more about this, okay? I don't care. So then they get to, so is, they're like, so is this Melissa, she gonna go to the wedding?
Starting point is 00:45:18 I'm like, oh God, even fucking Massey and Cassie give a shit about this wedding. I know. Who is feeding these two lines? I can guarantee these two ladies do not give a fuck about Teresa's wedding. They definitely do not. It's time for commercial. It's time for...
Starting point is 00:45:33 Hi, I'm Michael Patrick King, host of the official Max Companion podcast, and just like that, the writers room. Each episode, members of the writers room and I unpacked moments from season 2, sharing juicy details you can only hear from us. Stream and just like that season 2 is starting June 22nd on Max, and listen to end just like that, the writers room on Max or wherever you get your podcasts. What happens commercial? So then we cut over to a restaurant that is not Rails.
Starting point is 00:46:02 By the way, have they been to Rails this season? Have they? Have they? Because I tried to tag Rails the other day in a post about Jersey and it didn't come up. Is Rails closed? Is culinary? No, it's open.
Starting point is 00:46:15 It's open. What's open? It's open to fix our Instagram, because I got to tag some shit. Hey, that's the host of the reality is. My little door. Are you beautiful, nor? Host of reality is also listening to us.
Starting point is 00:46:26 Oh, this is a podcast convention in here. Hey, great news. Rails is open. So Rails unfortunately had to close in this nose. It hurts so bad coming back here and not immediately calling the Coke dealer. I'm like, you know what? You know, like when you break up with somebody and you land in their town and it's just that
Starting point is 00:46:48 bit of sat, I have that. I'm like, aww. And what do our theme is? This is me. Listen, we know Rails is still here because Jackson brought you back on TV. So, something's powering that. Anyway, Dolores and Paul are walking into a restaurant. I don't trust Paul, and this is why.
Starting point is 00:47:10 Because he's purple, like all of the other men on this show. Why is literally every person on this show purple? Not the person, the men. It's specifically the men. They're all purple. It's a dark purple. It's not a cute purple. Louie is the worst defender.
Starting point is 00:47:24 Gorgas purple. Frank is... What? Frank is probably like a medium terror level purple. But Paul is now purple as well. What happened? What are you doing to your men? It's the tight shirts. Let's be honest. It's the tight shirts. We all know. It's... Those of us who tried to do the medium thing before,
Starting point is 00:47:44 we all know. We turned those of us who tried to do the mischmedium thing before, we all know, we turn purple. I've tried it. So this is really why I don't trust him, because he follows behind every time, he's kind of love bombing. It's not as bad as Louis, but he's very like, look at you, I can't even walk behind you, look at that dumb truck.
Starting point is 00:48:00 God, most gorgeous thing I've ever seen in my goddamn life, y'all. Would you offer you some specials? I've got a special right near her name is Dolores, one of the most gorgeous women in Rails. Man, trust it. So this is the big dinner we've been waiting for all season, which is the coming together of Pauly and Frank. Yes.
Starting point is 00:48:23 And Frankie and Brittany and Gabby. And I bet Dorg was there too. And Valerie and a cookie. Italians never sit with their back to the door. It's just all counter service in Jersey. And Pauly, like, that's in case the hitman comes in. I'll tell you if he came in, I'd say this to him. You're not as good looking as Dolores, are you? I got this fuck.
Starting point is 00:48:54 Leave. I'm the only one hitting that. I'll tell you that. Take the canole. So... So Dolores is like, Frank wanted to have a dinner celebrating Frankie getting his dream job. I said guess what? Paulie's coming, that's it.
Starting point is 00:49:16 Yeah, well so am I, the past 30 years, what am I gonna say to that? So Frank, poor Frank and his mafia bastion knees, his... People asked on Reddit if that's true. But they were like, Frank's knees that were mysteriously broken. So they're all running into the restaurant and he's like, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? What's going on This is like a Gallagher show. I'm the biggest spitter. In the dirty way too, I'm spitting it out. But that was disgusting. I'm being a barbie here. My parents are here.
Starting point is 00:50:11 Because his parents are here. The minute I saw his parents, I was like, fuck this, fuck that. Then vaginas. You know, I was like, what's wrong with you? I was such a child. The second I see a parent. I'm so sorry. The point was, we need to start giving plastic bags to the bros. I was such a child. The second I see a parent. I'm so sorry.
Starting point is 00:50:25 The point was, we need to start giving plastic bags to the front row. Like you're watching the Orcas show, I see world, because it's gonna splash you. You never know when I'm coming. I'm just like, blah! Blah! Blah!
Starting point is 00:50:38 I've heard up there is very lucky. So, the Lord's like, Frank wanted to have a dinner celebrating. Frankie's new job, whatever the hell that is, because we never find out. Yeah, what's his dream job? It's still dreamy. No one's gonna say what it is. It's not only fans, because we... That's my dream job for him.
Starting point is 00:50:57 Oh my God. I just want to be around, uh, Frankie, just so I could start ringing the blowjob bell, because you know that, though, I will never forget that Dolores story so I could start ringing the blowjob bell, because you know that, I will never forget that Dolores story. She has Frankie as a blowjob bell. He dings it and someone gives him a blow. The hell is going on in that household!
Starting point is 00:51:14 Um, so anyway, I wrote, then the daughter comes in, covered in dog hair, probably. Ha ha ha ha! She's an Ancienchilla hair, she's a veterinarian. and covered in dog hair probably. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha the sweetest, most well-adjusted children on Bravo. And Dolores is one of my favorite people on Bravo. And we're like, yeah, I fucked him. That's what we do. That's how we love. That's how I love language.
Starting point is 00:51:51 So there's a lot of bro hugs when they get in. See what I mean? Boa Bustas. Because, sorry, that was March. So Frank goes, I'm the looney teens. So Frank's like, how you doing, Paul? And Paul goes, well, how are you doing? And Dolores goes, see what I mean?
Starting point is 00:52:07 Paul Buster's. I mean, it's these two. Such a Paul Buster. These two with each other. So Dolores is like, well, look at this, the Jersey Shore crowd. Well, yeah, well, why don't you guys come down now? He doesn't like the shore. I almost get the feeling that Paulie now. He doesn't like the shore.
Starting point is 00:52:25 I almost get the feeling that Polly doesn't want to be in the same family as me, but more than anything, I want this dinner to be where Polly sees this relationship. But the dwarfs and I, we're all together, and he will accept it. And then the family can go back to where it used to be with me, having dwarfs come into me, and then me cheating a bottom back. Yes. I love Frank crying every week like he doesn't break couches and rage while he was out cheating on his wife fucking Frank his version of crying is going like this.
Starting point is 00:52:55 I'm crying. Oh, I just cry. I'm a blubbery mess. Those are your normal Michael Darby eyes How dare you how dare you? I've had a lot of old dogs, okay, so The waiter I was glad to see the waiter is the perfect waiter for this Yes, this crack because he is also purple the waiter is literally purple on this show go back and watch it I'm not even making shit up.
Starting point is 00:53:26 Is it the water? By the way, I remember when I lived here in New York, everyone was like, oh my god, the water in New York, there's nothing like fucking water in New York. It's the best water, the best tap water you can ever get. Our friend Poppy would always be like, don't you drink hot. Our friend Poppy would always be like, don't drink the fucking that bottle of water, we got tap water, he has the best water in the fucking world.
Starting point is 00:53:47 Let's vote it, huh? I had some today. Did something happen to the water? Are we still proud of the water? That water was not the same water. That was some buddy water I had today. OK, back to, I don't know what I'm talking about. I'm so sorry. OK, so back to the show. So they're talking. They're making a small talk about how the kids don't drink. Yeah, they're not big drinkers.
Starting point is 00:54:08 And then Frankie Jr. goes, we got other vices. We got other vices. What are they? Because I will load up on whatever you need. He's like, Frankie? I'll be walking in Jersey around and it's like, I'm going to be walking in the car. I'm going to be walking in the car.
Starting point is 00:54:24 I'm going to be walking in the car. I'm going to be walking in the car. I'm going to be walking in the car. I'm going to be walking in the car. I'm going to be walking in the car. What are they? Because I will load up on whatever you need. He's like, Frankie? I'll be walking in Jersey around in a trench coat. Just like, what do you need, kid? Frankie's like, I got advice. I have to come clean. I've become addicted to loving my mother so much. Frankie has a blowjob bell and Gabby collects unwanted animals.
Starting point is 00:54:47 That's it. Long story short. So, Franky's like, well, well guys, you know, I'll be starting a new position soon. Huh? I'm going to be starting a new position soon. And Paul's like, will that require a battle as well? No. Not a sexual position. A job. A job. And Gabby's like, yeah, I don't know anybody in this world with a work ethic like Frankie Jr.
Starting point is 00:55:10 Well, how about you, Gabby? Three years old. She said she wanted to be a dog doctor. And guess what? She's a dog doctor. When I was three years old, I said, fuck you. And now I'm 47, and I've said it about 20 times tonight. So...
Starting point is 00:55:29 Just... It's circle of life. So Frank, like, yeah, that's what we are! Wait, we ain't gonna tell you we're proud of you, kid. We're fucking proud of you. And I'm glad that we're having this dinner because guess what? This family has been extended.
Starting point is 00:55:45 I have a boner. Yes, I do. It's gonna go for four hours. There's the pills I take. Brittany's like, oh Jesus Christ. By the way, Brittany, what a fucking prize. Why is Brittany not invited to any, in March, get on that? Have Brittany, oh why isn't Brittany included in marriage. Get on that. How Brittany, oh, why isn't Brittany included in sure?
Starting point is 00:56:07 Get her in it. I need to know what Brittany's saying, because ding dong. Yes. Sir, answer that door. So Delores, like, well, you know, it was a rough start with you two, Frank and Paulie. And Frank said, yeah, well, yeah. Well, my ass got reamed when I called him Buzz Lightyear for growing out loud. And Brittany's said, yeah, well, yeah, well, my ass got reamed when I called him Buzz Lightyear
Starting point is 00:56:25 for growing out loud. And Brittany's like, yeah, well, she was sticking out for her man. That's what she was doing. She was just sticking out for her man. And Paul goes, oh, yeah, she's doing what she does best. You know, and she did it all those years. Oh, Paul.
Starting point is 00:56:38 She's doing what she does best. I'm firing myself. This is the last fucking show I'm doing. That's a crazy... She's doing what she does. Best she did it all those years for you. I didn't say Frank. And Frank's like, yeah, so... So tell me this. You got to go relationship with your ex. Tell me about your ex wife.
Starting point is 00:56:57 He's like, yeah, I do. How do I do? How do I have a good relationship? And Gabby's like, yeah, I see a lot of us in Paulie's kids, because you know, those boys are just incredible. And then Frank goes, I don't even know their names. What? Nobody tells me. Nobody tells me I want to get this fucking outside.
Starting point is 00:57:13 Who's this? Who's this? No one tells me anything, there's kids. What? Well, we're going inside. And I'm still outside the fucking restaurant. I don't even what the kids are. I don't know what the kids are.
Starting point is 00:57:26 I don't know what the kids are. I don't know what the kids are. I don't know what the kids are. I don't know what the kids are. I don't know what the kids are. I don't know what the kids are. I don't know what the kids are. I don't know what the kids are.
Starting point is 00:57:34 I don't know what the kids are. I don't know what the kids are. I don't know what the kids are. I don't know what the kids are. I don't know what the kids are. I don't know what the kids are. I don't know what the kids are. I don't know what the kids are.
Starting point is 00:57:42 I don't know what the kids are. I don't know what the kids are. I don't know what the kids are. I don't know what the kids are. I don't know what the kids are. I don't know what the kids are. I don't know what the kids are. The kids. Get. I'm not even, it's literally scaring me at this point. So, they're talking about these kids. They're named Brooklyn and Carrie. Um. Just dating facts. So then, Frank is like, show, how old were you when you came to United States?
Starting point is 00:58:01 Wait, you found me in a different country? Why is it in one country? I'm living in a country. What is it in one country? What is it in one country? What were you when it, when United States, wait, you're from here, different country? What's in the one town here on the big country? What's in the one town here on the big country? What's in the one town here on the big country? What were you in the state's not united? What kind of you from? And Paul's like, I was 23, and Frankie goes,
Starting point is 00:58:15 ah, my age. Ha ha ha ha ha. Make it sound like it came over in the Titanic. Because I came over with just a box and a dream for boxing. And I said, I'm gonna take Nicole, could you come in and go out to West and get a homestead? Nicole Kidman. So, Frank's like,
Starting point is 00:58:37 so what are you the only one in your family? What'd you do for work? And I was like, I was a receptionist. And he goes, oh, can I call your tuts? That's how we do here, all right? You know what I'm saying? He slapped your ass, turn around. See what I'm saying?
Starting point is 00:58:49 Fucking borebuster. That's what he's saying. See, you know what? I wasn't the biggest polyfair when I first met him. You know, I thought, polyf was a little stuck up, you know? And I realized he's like me, you know? I went breaking some barriers. And that's all I was looking for.
Starting point is 00:59:02 He's just another type of Frank. Who talks with a lot of spit? And she's on his wife, I guess, I don't know. He's originally Frank, that's it. So, Brittnay's like, so when you got here, when you came out, when you made your policy, you made over to America. So did you know any English? Boy, what you learned it all in English?
Starting point is 00:59:29 Did you learn it over a year? Did you know some English? Was it scary? What's the music that's just like? Music that's like, man. First like, babe, you speak English, come on! Oh, so you spoke English over and I am here. You did speak it over there.
Starting point is 00:59:47 So you were raised by Lingle. By Lingle and I am here. So you were raised by Lingle and I am here. By Lingle and I am here. So you were raised by Lingle and I am here. By Lingle and I am here. So you were raised by Lingle and I am here. So you were raised by Lingle and I am here.
Starting point is 00:59:55 So you were raised by Lingle and I am here. So you were raised by Lingle and I am here. So you were raised by Lingle and I am here. So you were raised by Lingle and I am here. So you were raised by Lingle and I am here. So you were raised by Lingle and I am here. So you were raised by Lingle and I am here. So you were raised by Lingle and I am here.
Starting point is 01:00:01 So you were raised by Lingle and I am here. So you were raised by Lingle and I am here. So you were raised by Lingle and I am here. So you were raised by Lingle and I am here. So you were raised by Ling. So you were raised by Ling. So you were raised by Lingle and I am here. So you were raised probably goes over there, we all speak English. And she's like, oh, wow. America is a really popular place. I thought you guys only spoke, that's onion. It's not a language. Wow. And Gabby goes, I like having Brittany around.
Starting point is 01:00:24 Because she's like a built in play date. Wow, and Gabby goes, I like having Brittany around, because she's like a built in play date. I'm Brittany goes, guys, I'm an old soul, come on! Which does not explain anything. How don't care what age a soul is, you dumb as hell! Or as they say in Ireland, you dumb as hell. Or as they say in Ireland, old soul, English.
Starting point is 01:00:49 Frank, tell them what they said. So Frank's like, you want to wait, hang on, you want to die, hang on. She's like, oh my god, we went to Zoupland where he grew up. And you know what? I think we need to plan a trip for the guys because the guys were bitching while we were gone. So Paul's like, oh, you know what?
Starting point is 01:01:11 God damn it. Paul's like, you know what we need. We need to have an Irish party. No, you fucking don't need to have an Irish party. You got it. Okay, congratulations on being from Ireland. I don't need any more of it. I don't need none of it. Like, I don't need you to say that. We love it. Okay, congratulations on being from Ireland. I don't need any more of it. I don't need none of it.
Starting point is 01:01:26 Like I don't need you to show that to the family. I am a mole. I just went there. I'm a mole. That's my mother's maiden name. So somewhere somebody came from there I would guess. We do spell it wrong though, which I think is funny. So I think maybe I've got some kind of...
Starting point is 01:01:42 Shut the fuck up. I don't care. It's my point. So Paul is like, he's's like let's think about the old Ireland before Ireland really got on the map I was like what like 900 AD Are we gonna like put a peat bog in your living room? and I like put a peat bog in your living room. I wish I'd do a profession part in. Brittany's like, I told you he spoke Spanish, I told you. Ha ha ha ha ha ha.
Starting point is 01:02:12 Ugh. St. Lawrence, like, yeah, I'm really excited for you guys to see where I live now. It's that way you can have a huge amount of shame about living in a house with no railing on the stairway. And the Lawrence is like, I knew guys can see where I live now. And Frank's like, oh yeah, what, what you live there now?
Starting point is 01:02:30 What have you never come and know Dolores? Who am I? This is the guy who lives at home with a fucking kid, what I do! Well, I would hope this is what it is, Frank. He's like, wow, you guys are totally moving ahead. I mean, how are you guys getting engaged? Paul's like, huh. like, wow, you guys are totally moving ahead. I mean, are you guys getting engaged? Paul's like, huh.
Starting point is 01:02:46 Well, what about you guys? That's my question. Are you getting engaged to this thing you got here? That's my question to you guys. He's like, oh, yes, first. You talk about it. You talk about getting married. Tell me. Tell me. You know the kind of ring she wants, huh? And Paul's like, I already have it. I was like, okay, well, don't have a pissing match contest to the point where Dolores is like, oh great,
Starting point is 01:03:10 now I'm fucking getting married. I got like, oh no. Here it's happening. Jesus Christ, let the woman have a, you know, what is an Irish engagement? Listen, someone who's had a very hard week once saying that the ring doesn't mean a thing. Oh. Oh.
Starting point is 01:03:28 Kim Zolciak. Kim Zolciak and Kroy Beerman. What happened? I thought they were forever a couple because I know the fillers were last forever. I really did believe that they were. Did you guys believe they would stay together? I did. I mean, I figured he would go broke.
Starting point is 01:03:47 She spent all that damn money. Of course, he helped her. Mark, he did too. I mean, he has a new face, a new butt, new nuts, probably. He's got it all new too. He was spending it too. But I figured even once she went through all of his money, she'd just go back to banging big pop up while still married to him.
Starting point is 01:04:03 What are you doing, Cam? What are you doing? You're never gonna find another croig, Kim. Poor Kim Zolciak. That's all I have to say. Literally. Okay, so that's not nice, right? Who cares?
Starting point is 01:04:19 Okay, so Frank, they're talking about the ring and Frank's like, okay, you got the ring. Is it a pineapple ring? No, Frank, it's not a the ring and Frank's like, okay, you got the ring, is it a pineapple ring? No, Frank, it's not a fucking pineapple ring, okay. That's how Frank proposed to me. So we just think everyone whips out a fucking pineapple ring. All right. At the real ring, shut the fuck up, what am I left out of this?
Starting point is 01:04:36 What no one asked me about it. So then Dolores is like being nice about Brittany. She's like, you know what? Every time someone asks me about Brittany, I say, he couldn't have a better girl. Maybe a smarter girl. Maybe a smarter one. But in its own way, he couldn't have had a better girl.
Starting point is 01:04:55 But you know what? Listen, I don't know. It's nice to think about these things, but like my dad said, when Frank and I got married and he bought a house and put it in my name, don't put the cart before the horse. I was like, Frank is such a shady, shady man. What is he doing? I know. So Frank, he's like, well, other than marrying Brittany, which would be absolutely beautiful, by the way, I just want to put down the record of being beautiful on if I married this one, the best thing would be to have my son standing next to me
Starting point is 01:05:28 as my best man. And Frank is like, oh, thanks Dad. You really appreciate that so much, Dad. And to Lord, Brittney's like, to Lord, will you be my bride's maid? Oh. Oh. Lord, this is like a fuck.
Starting point is 01:05:44 Oh. Brittney thinks that someone who literally cleans up the bridal suite. I'm a fucking idiot. Chloris is like a fuck. Brittany thinks that someone who literally cleans up the bridal suite. My bride's made. So Frank's like, I was so worried about losing a family dynamic for Bolly, but now I see it's all okay. Where the table? I look around. I see purple. Purple. Ding dong. I see purple, purple, ding dong, dog hair, blow job bail, and me.
Starting point is 01:06:13 I couldn't be happier. The only thing that would make me happier right now would be if I could walk from this table to the kitchen, to the living room, and back to this table all day long. That would be a thrill. So we go over to Teresa's new house, which also looks like a really dollar store castle like her last house. Are there just a lot, is that like a style in New Jersey? Which is turrets. I need turrets, I need turrets everywhere.
Starting point is 01:06:43 So she's in one of those. And Rosie, the golden is going crazy because those dogs are fucking drug addicts and we've talked about this on this show for years. I've never seen dogs that love balls like a golden loves a ball that dog Wasn't this so what was this someone with the dog and the pool? I keep asking about this to bend five times The dog that they're at the golden in the pool. There was definitely a dog No, but this is Rosie the Archie's the Archie's the Archie's the average to bend five times. The dog, the golden in the pool. There was definitely a dog. No, but this way. This way.
Starting point is 01:07:07 This way. The Archie's the archie. Archie's the, he's like the sit and Nancy of the golden retrievers. That's when we realized that there was, the problem was bigger than we knew. But then on Dancing Queen's this week, another lady has a golden and that fucking sicko goes up to the balcony while she's talking on the phone downstairs and drops a ball from the balcony and then stairs at her like pick up the fucking ball.
Starting point is 01:07:32 Are you gonna pick up the fucking ball? Pick it up. Pick up the ball. Pick up the ball. Pick up the ball. Then there was another show where a golden was in the pool holding the holding the ball under the water and then he would let it go, and it would float up, and he'd be like, it's Dr. Sixth.
Starting point is 01:07:50 Okay, I'm sounding the alarm. So, Turya's just like, nothing, not even wanting you to walk down the island with us, but that's not happening, rolls, you know what I mean? She's literally like, any one or anything, other than Melissa Gorgah in this wedding. So she's like, So we just was saying me suggestions,
Starting point is 01:08:14 I'll see you in the arrangements and like, you like that? Like, I like it better, Alba Batagano, Alba Batagano, Alba, Alba, Alba, Albundish. She says she would prefer to do it alphabetically. I dare you.
Starting point is 01:08:30 I would love to see you try. Well, it's really not hard because everyone's names are with J. Joe, Joe, Joe, Joe, Joe. Jony, Joe, Joe. Jony number two, Joe Rosanna, Joe, Joe, Joe. And Nipita, Joe, Joe, and Joe. This would just seat by Joe's. So Turya says like,
Starting point is 01:08:50 Yeah, you know, I wanted to do something, you know, like maybe with a soulful, like maybe that could be like family on the soulfuls or something. But I don't want nobody to get in the thing about it, all right? And the way it's like, oh, like Joe and Melissa. Huh, oh, huh, oh, but who will I be? I keep came in just fucking evil this week, Lou. I mean, before we're like,
Starting point is 01:09:15 Louise, you know, Louise terrifying, yes, in the video last year. Where is that guy that come back to me? I fucking love you! I need you baby! We knew he was fucking crazy, Mars, Mount Mars. Mars sounded that alarm, and I feel like, you know, listen, Mars is a controversial character,
Starting point is 01:09:39 I think Mars deserves her to. Can you just give it up to Mars? Yes. Margaret. So this guy just came out today. He was like, fuck this. I'm just going full on a user. I was like, you need, listen, bitch flyer bloom season two.
Starting point is 01:09:57 I know your bitch ass was on here last year, but this year counts. You know what I mean? It's your first, because he's like a main guy this year He came out as a full abuser. I'm terrified. What are you talking about? What are you talking about? Huh? Huh? No, I'm not I'm not crazy I just believe in things like self-actualization and Bulging guys So it's always sniffing like something's in the air like you can smell a cat down the street He's just trying to squeeze a good one out So it's always sniffing like something's in the air like you can smell a cat down the street And they're like oh
Starting point is 01:10:28 He's just trying to squeeze a good one out so I Love you tree and I've never worried about Teresa, you know, I mean first of all I don't really care so there's that That helps I That helps. I'm like a news anchor just reading it with a smile. And then they died and then there was a car crash. Like I literally don't care. I was like, have fun in prison.
Starting point is 01:10:51 Your kids are gonna do great. Don't care. But I'm worried for it. Like I think she has a air pegs in her head. Like I think if she hits her head, she'll be fine. Like you could drop, you could literally drop an ant ball on her and air Maxwell pop out. And she's like, uh, nah, honey, that molasses a strip on. Like you could drop, you could literally drop an anvil on her and air Maxwell pop out and say, ah, not her, not an anvil, listen to strip pop. Like
Starting point is 01:11:07 whatever. I don't care. I am worried for Teresa and I don't think I really realized that I had some kind of love in me for Teresa but now I know because I'm worried. I'm worried. I'm worried. Well listen, listen, Louis, wait a second, in defense of Louis. Oh please, please, yeah. Listen, I think he seems very well adjusted. I think he seems totally chill, well adjusted. And there's like nothing weird about him.
Starting point is 01:11:39 Anyway, then he calls his mom, hey, sexy thing, how's it going? What's up hey sexy thing how's it going? What's up sexy thing? And the mom's like, oh I am, I'm sorry. Hey mom, quick question. So you want to do a separate answer to me? So it's like the difference between my family and Williams family is like they don't even compare, all right? Because whatever we need, they're there for me, all right? About my family, it's like nothing, right?
Starting point is 01:12:12 So they go inside, and she's, you know, of course, being a huge victim about everything. And so she's like, thankfully we didn't have any rain at the bridal shower. Everyone was still getting along, but Melissa! So, the drama of the episode. I know, we need to get back to that. Melissa and Teresa fighting, because I've-
Starting point is 01:12:33 Melissa has not RSVP to the rehearsal dinner or the brunch that's gonna be happening. That they didn't want to invite her to last week, you remember? This is the same dinner that Louie's like, we're not inviting them. Fuck on! They're not inviting them. Fuck on. They're not coming.
Starting point is 01:12:46 I don't want to take. We're filming on the camera, bring them. LAUGHTER Yeah. So... LAUGHTER So these two, we see a screenshot of their text with each other. I don't know how they to even communicate
Starting point is 01:13:04 because they've never heard of punctuation. Everything is like... Yeah, I'm living in the same desk and yeah, but I'm a little bit in the Bronx, I don't know where's my background, I'm a little bit in the Bronx, and Melissa's like, hi, now we cannot know what the text
Starting point is 01:13:17 which just got it today, I'm confused. There's cheer practice, and Antonia school districts. So Teresa's like, I'm not coming to either of the rehearsal and the bronches is. And Melissa's like, no, I didn't know anything about it.
Starting point is 01:13:34 I told today I have another party on Sunday and night before and on the wedding day. And I also hate you. It doesn't mean to say that delete, delete, delete. It's that serious stop, stop, stop. No, don't send sand, new message. Oh my god, you sent it. Come, Siri, take it back.
Starting point is 01:13:44 Take it back, Siri. How many relationships are ruined from that new fucking Siri? The microphone doesn't turn itself off like it used to. You remember? The voice thing was different. You would hit it, and then it would finish, and then it would turn out... Now it just stays there, and it's taking everything you say. Before you know it, it's like three paragraphs.
Starting point is 01:14:03 Like, did I send that? Donk. everything you say. Before you notice, like three paragraphs. Like, did I send this, don't? Fuck you, mom. You never left me. So, Louis, like, I don't want to read it anymore. It makes me literally sick. I'm only sad I don't have a giant pile of pillows to crawl into right now. So, he's like, let him have his family down, because I got from him being like in an year all these years, that's like the result of it.
Starting point is 01:14:32 And Louis's like, there's no way for a year. No one's trying. It's always blame and blame and blame and it's always your fault. It's always yours. And it's like, Joe told you, Joe told you, man, but... The Joe. It's always yours. And it's like, Jo, Tom, Jo, Jo, Tom, Jo, Jo, The Jo, The Jo,
Starting point is 01:14:47 The Jo, The Jo, The Jo, The Jo, The Jo, The Jo, The Jo, The Jo, The Jo,
Starting point is 01:14:55 The Jo, The Jo, The Jo, The Jo, The Jo, The Jo, The Jo, The Jo,
Starting point is 01:15:03 The Jo, The Jo, The Jo, The Jo, The Jo, The Jo, The Jo, The Jo, The Jo, The Jo, The Jo, The Jo, The Jo, The Jo, The Jo, The Jo, The Jo, The Jo, The Jo, The Jo, The Jo, The Jo, The Jo, The Jo, The Jo, The Jo, The Jo, The Jo, The Jo, The Jo, The Jo, The Jo, The Jo, The Jo, The Jo, The Jo, The Jo, The Jo, The Jo, The Jo, The Jo, The Jo, The Jo, The Jo, The Jo, The Jo, the Jo, The Jo, the Jo, The Jo, the Jo, the Jo, The Jo, the Jo, the Jo, the Jo, The Jo, the Jo, the Jo, the Jo, the Jo, The Jo, the Jo, the Jo, the Jo, the Jo, the Jo, the Jo, the Jo, the Jo, Jo, Jo Joe did it. Joe. So, whoa. Jinx. So, uh, Trees is like, yeah, cuz I ain't Malania was telling Joe what was going on. And then Joe was like, good boy, vibranous.
Starting point is 01:15:15 So, the Malania sent me a vine bread. I was like, Joe, I already got the bunny, Joe. The only time that Joe, my Joe, ever, and I find it was when brother Joe got in the way. So in some ways, like the only reason why anyone went to jail and the only reason why all the terrible things in the world ever happened was because of my brother. That was the only problem with Joe too, guys.
Starting point is 01:15:42 Joe Gorgah, it wasn't the mistress in the wine. What was that the vineyard? Yeah. When it said, come on, fuck me up against this wine vine. And he did. And then he was on the phone with that mistress being like, my bitch wife is here. Fuck her.
Starting point is 01:15:59 My brother. My brother called me crazy so many times. He was like, you crazy. You crazy. You crazy. You know what happened Putin invaded Ukraine That's cuz of my brother Thanks a lot Margaret
Starting point is 01:16:17 Thanks a lot So Louis just like these people are terrible they're terrible I don't want them in your life anymore And he's like grabbing grabbing grabbing. You know what? I just wanted to be like that for me You know, but like my family ain't like your family strip us a meme So he's like yeah, well, we're gonna get. And then I'm not gonna allow nobody to do nothing to you like to, except for again. So then we go over to the other ding-dong. Oh, my God.
Starting point is 01:16:50 Damn. Damn. Oh, my God. Truly one of the dumbest people that's ever done this. That's amazing. So amazing. Some of the most amazing casting we've seen on Jersey. So she said, home organizing bathing suits as you do.
Starting point is 01:17:03 And her, her, her, And her little baby bathing suit. Her gutter mouth, mother angel comes over. Who the fuck are you doing, any of these fucking bathing suits? God, fucking damn it. I was like, so she's like, ma, look at all these bathing suits. Look, they're really cute in person, right? And angels like, yeah, everything is cute in person. Sometimes the pictures don't do it justice.
Starting point is 01:17:22 You know, no, it doesn't do it justice. The design, the styling, and the stitch work. But other than that, beautiful. Beautiful. Blame the pictures. She goes, so, is this a cover-up or a dress? Blame the pictures. That is just some bad design. So, she's like, damn, you know, pictures, damn my biggest problem.
Starting point is 01:17:47 You know, I had pictures and then, you know, my brother, he would make fun of my pictures on Instagram. I just got fucking sick of it. And I was like, and then he never talked to me again. Like, oh, shut up. Every time they get on her, she's like, oh, I got you know, what would make this made the suit look less like a comparable like a draft? If my brother didn't see everything through with a fucking heart! Yeah. Don't have hope for that family at the moment.
Starting point is 01:18:19 There's not a lot. That's basically, and also the brother doesn't speak to the mom because she took her side. Listen, when you're ready to bring this all on the show and replace Melissa and Teresa, do it. But until then... And now, a little bit too late into the episode if you ask me, is the first arrival of... Jennifer's renovation pilot for HDTV. Yeah! Yeah! How about that? Jennifer's renovation pilot for HDTV. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:18:50 Listen. Hi, I'm Brad and Melda from Cherokee. We've been working on this paper all day. All day for you. Melda and Michael, please enjoy this 50-foot square foot apartment. I know there's no bathroom, but you can always drive to Paramis and come into our giant house and use one of our 19. During COVID, my brother had a close jewelry business and moved to Turkey. But now he's back.
Starting point is 01:19:26 He's back, he's got jewelry, and now he's got a home. Thanks to me, Jennifer. Her mom's never went to be who was a resident. And what I mean is that I mean a resident, not like a resident at the pool house. We were struggling, babe. My in-law supported us financially. And now to help my brother and his strange wife is a blessing. Whatever her name is, legend of Melda, something like that.
Starting point is 01:19:57 There's a new Melda coming out tomorrow, I hear. I was very happy to see Melda because I have high hopes for Melda as well. I need a messy ass. Yes, Melda. Right. I love that because it's an action nice apartment and they set it up and Melda is like, Jennifer, Jennifer, you have such a big heart, Jennifer. I just love it. Thank you so much for everything and I heard that Margaret told Laura that someone caught Melissa cheating a guy in car
Starting point is 01:20:31 Asso, Arson. What is this world Arson? Oh Thank you for everything you do for me Almost I'm finished with court report school. I was like, oh, oh no, they're raising Melda up for something here. And Jen's like, that's okay, you're my sister. You're my sister now. Now I hope you enjoy the furniture I picked out for you. There's one toilet over there. You can watch TV on.
Starting point is 01:21:02 And there's another one over there, the microwave's on top of. That's like a 16-toilet apartment for a sister. That's little toilet, it's all over the apartment. Oh, you know, it's really good, Michael. This is a good spot. It's really good for Melda, cause they got all these shops nearby. You know, ladies, they only want a shop, baby.
Starting point is 01:21:24 Oh, this way, she doesn't have to be so needy towards you. It's like excuse me. I see you, that's what I'm looking for. Your wife and needy wife, that's why we got her in the neighborhood with shops. Otherwise you just pick a plan and make a plan and make a plan and make any good wife would do. She can plan to maybe, because she says she come home from work and then you just go stay to bed. I said if you see my life, I'm being struck off in a poor house, 23 out of 24 hours. Do you know that slide to go out to a poor house and put your ear to the door and all you hear is He has, yes, queen. Yeah. What's he doing in there?
Starting point is 01:22:10 So she starts in, which I'm sure her brother loves the thing to this shit. You know, it's like, oh my God, same story from Turkey to here. It's like, where is he? Where's Bill? Does Bill Catherine Olivia wants to actually help people for a living? He's like,
Starting point is 01:22:27 I just flew in from Turkey. Can I please go to sleep? I'd leave for Christ's sake. Jesus. So then, we go to a foodistine. Okay, now this is, this is, I've been kind of mean about this whole thing because I was like, you're just bringing that kid on here to adopt him because this happens to be the year you're on housewives and you're using it for a storyline and that seems tacky. I take it back. This was a nice
Starting point is 01:22:51 scene. So I'm just publicly taking it back. Yeah. I thought it you know I would admit when I'm wrong. Basically, well, but I probably am. I feel like I'm wrong. Yeah. What we found out is that the adoption of the lawyers, whatever they sent out, someone to make contact with Jaden's birth mom, which explains why people were going through Teneflie going, Fuda, Fuda, Fuda, Fuda, Fuda, Fuda, Fuda, Fuda, Fuda, Fuda.
Starting point is 01:23:20 And Teneflie. Fuda. So yeah, we find out that they're trying to get it. I mean, listen, you would never be able to dot my child, because I don't call back and I don't text back. I was like, I'm keeping that kid forever, whether I want him or not. So it's a really nice scene with the kid, and she's like, do you want this?
Starting point is 01:23:40 Because you're like my son. Because like, I knew you. Like, when you were little, and like, you're mine. And I want you. And he's like, yeah, I want you. He's like, sure, because I knew you. Like when you were little and like, you're mine. And I want you. And he's like, yeah, I want you. He's like, sure. It was so nice. And I think also because of the Mattelda.
Starting point is 01:23:50 I do have the Mattelda effect, too. Mattelda effect can really do a lot. So then after. And life is a miracle. That was the scene. Every life is a fool, a fool, a fool, a fool. I like, this is the part of the show where I like to think about how confused my parents are?
Starting point is 01:24:09 I love looking around at husbands and parents. That's this poor guy, like a little boy. He's getting a conciliatory tap on the shoulder. You're getting some deny, buddy. You earned it. So now we go over. Now it's time to get ready for this big Irish party at Paul's house. It's like Irish but also prohibition.
Starting point is 01:24:29 I guess. But there probably will be like a Fakacha alligator there too. What? They didn't have Fakacha in Ireland? I was disappointed to see a Dolores party without a word spelled out in Fakacha. That was Ireland. Thatakacha. That was... I-a-land. That was rough.
Starting point is 01:24:47 That was a rough watch. So... Jerry says just nailing soda things to the wall. Well, I had about soda bread. I apologize to everyone here. You did not pay for that. You did not pay money for those sort of jokes. So the best.
Starting point is 01:25:01 You don't deserve any of that. Okay. So Dolores is talking to the staff. She's like, okay, everybody listen. Me, Kasa, Esu, Kasa. So whatever you need, growth, go through the drawers. I'm not going to have time. We're a bunch of crazy bitches in this house, okay?
Starting point is 01:25:16 If you see anybody being pushed, just help them keep their weave on. All right? Just go through the drawers, find what you need. And Paul's like, but not in the Irish ways. Because the Irish, that's your underpants. Irish drawers. No one's going through those drawers, but me. I'm the man in this house.
Starting point is 01:25:35 So then we're seeing what everyone's doing around town. They get ready for this big party. So Melissa's like, I cannot wait for you to see my outfit, Joe. And he's like, oh yeah, yeah, yeah, it's gonna be sexy, yeah? Yeah, yeah, there it is, yeah, there it is. Well, there it is. What are we doing for this party, huh?
Starting point is 01:25:54 What is it? What is it? It's a party? What? Yeah, it's themed. It's a theme party tonight. It's gonna be like prohibition, you know? Prohibition?
Starting point is 01:26:02 Oh, yeah, yeah, like back in the day. You have no idea what prohibition means, do you? Yeah, I do. It's what Home Depot gave me. Hey, by the way, when is that over? I need nails. So then we go over to Margaret, she's like, okay, Joe, Joe, get over here.
Starting point is 01:26:21 Okay, you know what, okay, I'm gonna get ready. I'm gonna wear a little turban. Okay, I mean, we're prohibition turban, but in the Irish style. So I'll have the 40th clover on it Okay, Joe put it on Joe now put it on me now put on Lexi now put it back on me Joe why aren't you playing the game turban game come on Joe whether you've been in no swanson go teach need no to pee go So then we see a sign because we're going to Daniel's neighborhood now and the sign says succeed in Sayerville. Is anyone here from Sayerville?
Starting point is 01:26:51 Is that a poor ass neighborhood? We have Sayerville people here. Is that a poor neighborhood because I feel like rich neighborhoods don't say succeed here. Yeah, that's like what you put on like a billboard and back to the future to start a new town that Michael, come on guys, we can do it. It's an aspirational branding for Say Yourville. So then we go over to the fooda, and fooda's trying on a parade, and she's like, you look like Picasso. Which, wait, what Samuel Jeff? I'm not going to say that.
Starting point is 01:27:18 I'm not going to say that. I'm not going to say that. I'm not going to say that. I'm not going to say that. I'm not going to say that. I'm not going to say that. I'm not going to say that. I'm not going to say that. I'm not going to say that. say your bill. So then we go over to the food and food is trying on a pareray and she's like, you look like Picasso. Which? Wait, or Samuel Jackson.
Starting point is 01:27:31 That was closer. I'm going to have to wait, take away two points for the, I don't think he looked like Picasso. I'm just going to be crazy. I'm going to say that was not a Picasso look. John Fuda and a black leather beret for a prohibition party. He looked like Katie Maloney, because he was wearing the... That was some Katie Maloney shirt going on there.
Starting point is 01:27:57 That was. It was a convenient narrative. So then we got... You're just a nasty little... No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, Let's see your looks for your night girl friend just sitting here with messy hair with my armpit over the couch spill the tea girls Fill it all Little Olivia's got a cigarette holder she's like Oh! Little Olivia's got a cigarette holder, she's like, the she goes ready to fly and she's out enough to smoke now, mama.
Starting point is 01:28:53 Little fucking hero, Olivia. Mmm. Love her. My favorite. Give me that thing, Olivia. I wish I was there to put a little Benson in hedges in that thing. So close to giving up the dream of being in love therapist going back to Broadway. So then Melissa and talk or Melissa and Gorg are talking about Paulies and how such a manulent masculine man pad and
Starting point is 01:29:21 Gorgas like so how long has he been divorced huh? Which kind of goes back to the beginning of this show and Melissa's like I just assumed Frank was gonna come as his Frank calls so Frank calls and they you know they're Best in pulls guys. Yeah, so Joe calls up Frank. He said That was actually just that ringtone. A. A. Oh, what's going on? It's a war.
Starting point is 01:29:50 A. It's me. Oh. Yeah, oh yeah, I'm going. Yeah, I'm going to go, well, sorry, we recently had dinner, by the way. Paulie and Brittany and the kids. Brittany learned about Ireland and English. It's exciting.
Starting point is 01:30:03 It went well. It was very nice. Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey Bro, bro. Was it a pineapple ring? No. So, some of us is like, do you think tonight's an engagement? So then, Margaret, back to Margaret. Margaret's like, everything at the shower was cordial, but unless it was just another guest, I didn't like that. You know, she should have had more attention at the spritle. I mean someone should have said
Starting point is 01:30:46 something to Melissa. I mean she could have had a whole speech. She would say anything about Melissa. What is she going to say? I hate you, you fucking whore. I've never liked your ass. You've never liked my ass. Please don't even fucking bother. Send a gift and don't sign it so I don't have to thank your whore ass once you send it, okay? So then Danielle, oh sorry, no I was gonna say so then Danielle, oh literally the same thing, so then Danielle, she's like, she's like, so guess what? Danielle started up with me and she just bring up stupid Laura Court reporter again. Short Court reporter with no family from Mayapak.
Starting point is 01:31:32 I mean come on, she have to bring that up again. And then we see a clip of Danielle coming up tomorrow and going. If a friend came out of the world, work about me and start listening and stuff like that about me, I's not listening It's tough like that about me, I'm just saying Wait for your second season, Danielle Ah And Marl just like, it's not a friend, it's a court reporter But don't you understand?
Starting point is 01:31:57 You know what, Danielle? She's always trying to confront me You know, I had dished about you I had that shit about you And I was like, you know what? You're a little bit of a douche I'm a little, you know what? You're a little bit of a douche. I'm a little bit of a douche. I'm a little bit of a douche.
Starting point is 01:32:07 I'm a little bit of a douche. The Daniel goes, What did you do to the ha? Cause this chick is coming to destroy you. Meanwhile, when they said, What did you do to your brother that he, like, I threw out of his life? Like, don't talk about it right now. So then, food is like, yeah, well, a guy's night.
Starting point is 01:32:28 I was like, what's up Nate? What's up with your wife calling my wife a rat? And basically, he says like, she felt like she was speaking in confidence, but I explained that to your friend, and you're gonna have a back, so shut the fuck up. I was like, whoa. I was like, I can see why you would marry that lump.
Starting point is 01:32:46 I bring him on. Yes. I want that man on my side. So now Jennifer Aiden has a breathless piece of news for everyone. She goes, oh my God, Bill. Oh God. Oh, I called Laura. I called Laura to see if she's who she's been talking to Bill.
Starting point is 01:33:02 And she leaked the personal text messages. The Margaret sent text messages to friends. And guess what she said. She said that Laura is a snake. So you're telling all your friends, there's a snake because the snake is repeating everything that you said. Come in, am I STEA orE, I'm Mr. I think Margaret is nervous because Margaret doesn't know how much this woman defaults to us Which I just can't say, I can't say any of it But she said a lot, but I can't say any of it But it was so terrible, I wish I could say it
Starting point is 01:33:41 I'm gonna do tell one person, but I promised I won't tell anyone else, but I may tell another person. It was awful. And you wonder why that man is in the pool house? I love this guy. There he is. You wonder why that man is in the pool house? Shut the fuck up!
Starting point is 01:34:02 I didn't even want to hear that, and you're like one of my favorite people on the earth. So then Danielle, back to Danielle, she's like, in all honesty, because you're talking about this rumor. And she's like, you know what, if someone was saying this about me, I want one of my friends to know,
Starting point is 01:34:18 I'm like, you literally called Rachel Arat when she did the same thing for Margaret. I don't want to shoot the messenger. You know what? Sometimes messengers need to get fucking shot. Those gossipy little fucks. Personally, I'm sick of messengers and their nosy asses. I mean, does anyone really like Facebook Messenger? No. No.
Starting point is 01:34:41 So, Daniel's like, you know, that lady's coming for Mark, right? So she busted it, something's that way, that's something back coming around the mountain, and he's like, oh, lady's so fucking crazy. So then we get to the climax scene of the episode, which is, I love this scene. This is the final scene of the episode. And it's Theresa and Louis getting dressed, well, it's supposed to be them getting dressed for this party, but it's really more like Theresa
Starting point is 01:35:09 watching Louis as he inserts himself into a pile of pillows and takes himself out and goes back in and comes back out. I think goes into the pillows. He's like weaving in the himself and pillows. It's a lot of pillow move. There's like a lot of pillow work in this scene. It's like a lot of like, you know what? I don't want to hear it anymore. And you know what? Another thing. I don't want to hear it anymore.
Starting point is 01:35:29 Because it's terrible stuff. It's terrible. And you know what? I don't want to hear it. I'm like, could you just take a seat and have your scene please? Yeah, just get your lines out. So he's like, go. You know what I'm going to weigh? This. Because I got it for a guest be party a few years ago. Yeah, stop. Stop with the fucking guest be parties. If there's anyone in here, just stop with a lot of guys. So, Tury says, like,
Starting point is 01:35:54 Oh, he got his green style of soul sexy. Like, I used to got stuck by my exes clothes, right? Like, like, I don't want to tell him how to dress. He's got very good days. I was like, all bet he tells you how to dress. After watching this scene, I'll bet he has plenty to say about how you have to dress. This is popular.
Starting point is 01:36:11 Louis. I feel like Louis would be a perfect candidate to be on the cover of GQ. LAUGHTER Like, huh? Q. LAUGHTER So Teresa's like, I hold tonight is calm because I tried to call my brother to pass you names and he didn't call me mad.
Starting point is 01:36:32 I'm like, he's never not taking my call. You know, so it's just like what? Okay, so this is kind of different because Teresa does act victim me a lot, you know, but I see her mostly do that with Melissa I feel I'm kind of buying it. Sorry. I'm kind of buying it I think it's because she wasn't wearing makeup like I don't know what it was Yeah, that was makeup thing. There's like a certain vulnerability and Teresa not wearing makeup. Yeah, it really highlights the It really highlights the... The... The highlights, the vulnerability that is...
Starting point is 01:37:09 That one can have between your eyebrows and your hairline. I'm just... I'm expressing empathy. So, Louie is like... He's like, you know what, your brother? He's going through something that's inhibiting, inhibiting inhibiting inhibiting inhibiting inhibiting inhibiting inhibiting. Yeah. His ability to approach things from normal situations.
Starting point is 01:37:36 I was like, no, I wasn't happening right now, inhibiting is bad. Yeah, but you know what, right now it's on purpose because you know what? In case anyone didn't know we're gonna married And this bullshit ends the shame I feel so bad for you guys. Oh, I feel so bad for you guys She's like I'm so sorry, and he's like don't apologize. I like his actions. Those are not your actions His actions hold on hold on Hold on, hold on. Amazing Stefan note, just got a ham to live it. I swear to God. Hey, could you play a little organ for me, sir?
Starting point is 01:38:13 Well, I do this monologue. Sure. You know when I got insulted? Honestly, where I forgot his ass. It wasn't because he said fuck you Louis. It was when he said you're miserable. And meanwhile, you see your happiness, you see your vulnerability, living your best life here, and then you go and you say she's miserable.
Starting point is 01:38:39 You know why you say someone's miserable? Because he doesn't want to see you happy and they rather see you broken down women dealing with so much shit because They don't have a giant pile of pillows under that That's why That is why That's a very monologue episode Thank you for the musical accompaniment.
Starting point is 01:39:07 And you sure did come queen. So Teresa's like, I just want a piece. And then he's like, no you don't. And he's so unhinged. And now he's doing the whole like, you know it's been peaceful. I like, you know why? Because we haven't had him. He hasn't been here. I'm going to save you from Because we haven't had him. He hasn't been here.
Starting point is 01:39:25 I'm going to save you from this. You're never going to have to deal with this. This is the typical separate, the abuser separates you from your family. There it is. There it is. There it is. And he's been so good.
Starting point is 01:39:36 There's that psychological theory. He's been so good like we, like I said, you can see he's psycho. We all know that. Psycho people deserve love too. I mean, I guess that's's psycho. We all know that. Psycho people deserve love too. I mean, I guess that's where I've been kind of falling. Like, so he's a little psycho. Teresa's not. It's a little bit psycho.
Starting point is 01:39:53 Teresa's a little bit psycho too. You know, sometimes psycho needs psychos, but this is very, very, very, very bad. Doing this separation thing. So then Teresa starts crying because he, very, very bad. Doing this separation thing. So then Teresa starts crying, because he's going off so bad. And I think Teresa's like, oh, wow, and I really got a break up with my brother.
Starting point is 01:40:12 And I like it. She goes, so do you plan on talking to him? He goes, oh, your brother? I was like, who else? I'm like, Rick Springfield. I don't know what you're talking about. You know, you know what I've seen him do, gas like ya. He gas like ya. You're 11 woman in a gas site. I know where you heard that term, sir. It was from that lady who ran across America wearing a wedding dress because of your
Starting point is 01:40:43 narcissists crazy disorder or whatever she was saying and the people magazine She said you were a gas lighter And it was like the same episode Michelle Obama said she watched that was a good people episode So Louis goes you know what I find them boring and I wouldn't even share a cup of water with him It's disgusting. Wow. I got a cup of water. A cup of water.
Starting point is 01:41:07 Whoa. Wow. So sorry, Joe Gorgah, if you're just like slightly thirsty, you're going to have to go somewhere else. Not going to get water here. Yeah. I mean, that is a big thing to say when you're purple. You ain't getting that glass of water.
Starting point is 01:41:23 So Louis, like, I don't even want so much wasting the flash of a camera on your brother and Melissa. And if you saw me staying in the snake pit, would you pull me out of the snake pit? And she's like, awww. Oh. Why you in there? No, because, okay, let's say I was walking and I fell into a bit of snakes.
Starting point is 01:41:50 Then would you help me? Get out of this mate. Yeah, no, I'm trying to ask you for help. Are you hurt? No, I'm out. One touched me. Oh, will you help? Oh, look at that snake right there. Hey, talk to that snake right there. No, I'm out there one one touched me. Oh You say
Starting point is 01:42:26 So it's like he's like well, I'm here. I'm here to pull you out of this snake pit. That is your brother. No thanks. I'll stay in this snake pit. You fucking crazy pants. So then we get some previews for next episode. All right, you know what? Next time, and the real housewives, have new jersey. Welcome to Ireland, but in New Jersey.
Starting point is 01:42:48 Oh, wow. Thanks so much. It feels just like we're back in Glamrs, Ireland. All we need is a huge pit of shit to jump in. Thanks for sharing your culture, Paul. I'm trying, you know what? I'm trying to navigate this Danielle Ruma. I mean, this Melissa Ruma.
Starting point is 01:43:04 Like, I'm just trying to be as delicate as possible, be as considerate as I possibly can be. Hey, Melissa, I heard a Roma. You was a slut and cheated on your husband, whoah! Me? You know what? You know, listen. You listen.
Starting point is 01:43:22 You listen. No. Listen, why are you talking about someone you don't even fucking know? Don't shoot the messenger. You're not a fucking messenger, you're a shit starter. Everyone's got your number lady. Don't you ever, don't you ever put your finger in my mouth. Don't you put your finger in my face or my mouth.
Starting point is 01:43:39 Anyway, I'm around here. I've been in a fight some my day to know when something's gonna escalate. Look at you, Moran. Look at you. Look at you. Disgusting. Disgusting.
Starting point is 01:44:00 Disgusting. Let go of me. Let go of me. Disgusting. Disgusting. You let go of me. I'm gonna fuck you. Get off me. Get of me. Let go of me. Let go of me. Let go of me. You let go of me. I'm gonna fuck off. You Let go of me. Get off me. Get off me. Get off me. Okay, everybody, everybody, stop.
Starting point is 01:44:11 I'm getting married. And that was the Real Housewives of New Jersey. Watch what crap ends with like to think it's premium sponsors. Ain't no thing like Allison King. Ashley Savoni, she don't take no baloney. Dana C. Dana Duh. She's not just a Sheila. She's a Daniella. Itchels.
Starting point is 01:44:44 Aaron McNickles, she don't miss no trickle-ists. Jamie, she has no last name-y. Alva Nagila Weber! Sip some scotch with Jessica Tratch! She's always supplying, it's Kelly Ryan. Kristen the Piston Anderson! You're never alone with Lacey Monteleone. Let's give a kisserino to Lisa Lino!
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Starting point is 01:45:24 Nobody holds a candle to Jamie Kendall. She's not harsh, she's Jill Hirsch. My favorite Murto, Karen McMurto. We love him madly, it's Kyle Podd, Chadly. Let's go on a bender with Lauren Fender. We want to hang with Liz Lang, the incredible edible Matthewsisters, Nancy C. C. DeSisto. Give him hell, Miss Noel.
Starting point is 01:45:46 Ray-Rain LaRue. Choose the Queen Bee, it's Sarah Lemke. Shannon, out of a can in Anthony. Let's take off with Tamela Plane. Shaint No Shrinking Violet Coochar. We love you guys. Hey, Prime members. You can listen to Watcher Crappens,
Starting point is 01:46:02 Add Free on Amazon Music, download the Amazon Music app today. Or you can listen to Watcher Crappens Add Free on Amazon Music, download the Amazon Music app today. Or you can listen Add Free with Wondry Plus in Apple Podcasts before you go tell us about yourself by completing a short survey at Wondry.com slash survey. Raising kids can be one of the greatest rewards of a parent's life. But come on, someday, parenting is unbearable. I love my kid, but is a new parenting podcast from Wondry that shares a refreshingly honest and insightful take on parenting.
Starting point is 01:46:34 Hosted by myself, Megan Galey, Chris Garcia, and Kurt Brownleur, we will be your resident not so expert experts. Each week we'll share a parenting story that'll have you laughing, nodding and thinking, oh yeah, I have absolutely been there. We'll talk about what went right and wrong, what would we do differently? And the next time you step on yet another stray Lego in the middle of the night, you'll feel less alone. So if you like to laugh with us as we talk about the hardest job in the world, listen
Starting point is 01:47:03 to, I love my kid, but wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen ad-free on the Amazon Music or Wondery app. Celebrity beef, you never know if you're just gonna end up on TMZ or trending on Twitter or in court. I'm Matt Bellasive. And I'm Sydney Battle, and we're the host of Wonder Woman's new podcast, Dis and Tell. Each episode explores a different iconic celebrity feud, from the build-up, why it happened, and the repercussions.
Starting point is 01:47:32 What does our obsession with these feud say about us? We're starting off with a pretty messy love triangle between Selena Gomez and Justin and Haley Beaver. A seemingly innocent TikTok of Selena talking about her laminated eyebrows. It snowballed into a full-blown alleged feud. But it doesn't seem like fans are letting up anytime soon. Despite both Selena and the Beaver's making public statements denying any bad blood. How much of this is teen jealousy and lovers quarreling, and how much of it is a carefully crafted narrative designed to sell albums.
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