Watch What Crappens - RHONJ: Trick or Retreat

Episode Date: November 17, 2017

This week's Real Housewives of New Jersey has the women headed to an overnight retreat, but there's no room for empowerment when allegations of drug use, bullying, and public shaming are at play. Come grab a Rails-tini and listen to our recap! See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.Our Patreon Extras: https://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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slash watch what crap ends that's patreon.com slash watch what crap ends. Hey everyone, welcome to watch what crap ins. Ronnie Caron from trashtalktv.com and the Rose Prick's Bachelor podcast. What's up Ronnie? Well, hello! Sorry, I sneezed and I did it on mute so that way you wouldn't have to hear it, but I thought you were going to do a whole... Well hello! How are you, Benjamini? Instead of the... No!

And instead I was like, shit, I'm still sneezing! Nope, that's all I had, a big hello. I'm on a new mic today, so if I sound different, that's why. I hope I don't make anybody's ears bleed. I'm trying to figure out my yelling voice around this new microphone. Yes, and I'm on my old microphone, but it's been about two years, and I still don't know the proper settings on it, because we are the most professional podcast there is on the world. on it because we are the most professional podcast there is on the world on the world web

as evidenced by that. Dead air. Yes, over nearly six years later and we're still perfecting our time. It's great, great, great work. We were talking about that we would have tour dates ready to announce later this week. Guess what? We lied. We lied. And it's not our fault. We will get these days to you as soon as we can. But it's not. We lied or did the theater is lied. Okay, just lie.

It's just a lot of balls in the air right now. And basically, like if we were the juggler, we, all our balls are in the air right now. We are are just waiting to catch them and once they land back in our hands Then we will send the balls to you but for right now the balls We're just waiting we are waiting to get emails back as It's just part of life. It's the life life of Being a podcaster that's what the circle of life means, that song. It means waiting for emails. Yeah.

That's basically what the whole Lion King movies about you guys. And waiting to exhale. And waiting to exhale. Fucking emails. Yeah, and waiting to exhale. Yeah, and until a bass it just needed an email on time. She would have kept that guy's stuff in the house instead of throwing it all over the lawn. Yeah, it's just, yeah, it's, you know, we wanted to announce it this week so

way it wouldn't get lost in Thanksgiving, Mania. But now I'm realizing how ridiculous from it even assumed that we would have anything even ready before Thanksgiving. So we just please promise us that you will keep staying in tune for it. And if we do announce it, like in the in the in the mix of Thanksgiving, just like make sure it doesn't get lost in your mind space. Well, it's fitting that we're going to be announcing on a Turkey day. Couple of turkeys. Imagine we announced it on Thanksgiving. That would be really smart of us.

Knowing us, we will do that. Guess what everyone while you're on your island being here. We won't even be working. Yeah. We'll just like announce it to somebody we know and forget to announce it on the show. We're like, why is nobody here? Well, you guys know that that's alike

because we'll announce it every goddamn five minutes to second we find out. Yeah, it's true. I'm sure the audience is really worried that we're taking you day off of announcing something. Well, we basically hold our audience hostage. We're like, until you sell out this venue, we are gonna announce it every single day. So people like just buying it just to get us to show them, buying tickets.

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That's all happening. It's all happening. A lot of people are buying that merch because every time someone buys one, we get an email from Amazon, be saying something like, your order has shipped and we keep getting those emails, which is on the one hand a little annoying because I'm like

I thought someone wanted to communicate with me, but it's just an Amazon alert, but on the other hand, it's so awesome So thank you everyone who's buying our merchandise. Yes. Thank you guys And also thank you to everybody over at Real House last in New Jersey because this shit is hilarious And it's been making me laugh every single week consistently. Yeah, thank you. Thank you for putting on a great show. So that's it for today. You guys will be back tomorrow to talk about it. Yes, this was a great talk guys. Okay, everybody enjoy their Thursday. Yeah, now let's let's dive into Real House was a new Jersey unless we have any other announcements. We're some ringtones up for our patreon peeps, so that'll be fun We just recorded a bunch like a bunch and there are best batch yet

That's yeah, those will be up end of the weekend for the L.P.A.D. Dream. Yeah subscribe out but in the meantime Before my caffeine high goes away. Let's get into some real housewives of New Jersey. Well, I'm loving there like deep jazz, Cassio keyboard sounds, the smooth, deep Cassio keyboard sounds of bottom, t-t-t-b bottom. Also, they're doing a lot of like Amy Winehouse 50s music, which kind of fits with the level of misogyny on this show. It's like Pleasantville. It's like the least pleasant version of Pleasantville ever. But it's not even really Amy Winehouse. It's like the Amy Winehouse knockoff. So it's like

the Duffy version, you know? Duffy. Remember all the fake Amy Winehouses that came out around Amy Winehouse time like Duffy because like Amy Winehouse would be Real House of New York City and New Jersey is Duffy. Yes, totally. So if Real Housewives of New Jersey was by that part of New Jersey with the IKEA, which is probably where Duffy is playing these days. Oh, Duffy. I beg of you if I'm assy. Yeah.

I still love that song, Duffy. I don't care if it's a ripoff. I mean, Amy Winehouse was just ripping off the 50s, you know? That's true. Do you remember they have guys? Yeah. Where did we begin? Where do we end?

We're just one, we're in one big, semi-lacquarm of life. Well, I did one thing to research this week for real house. I'm assuming Jersey I actually looked up on the dictionary to Loyalty and it does have to lower its face And when you like turned to the pages you got a problem. What do you want to do about it? My face? She's like loyalty. It's none of your fucking business loyalty it's none of your fucking business I bought that some business name loyalty is like wait a second it is our business so the

episode opens with Joe well I can't just say Joe because there's now about ten different Joe's but but Margaret's Joe opening the door of a car and letting her eyes like maji she's she he I don't know I'm laughing at that I just but Margaret's Joe opening the door of a car and letting her out and he's like, ma-ji, she's like, she, I don't know why I'm laughing at that, I just thought it was funny. That it opens up. It's a ma-ji. Because this was so funny, it's like, ma-ji and she's like, I write, Joe, don't fight with me about the wallpaper.

Okay, for good- I have to kill you. You not fight with me about the wallpaper, Joe. Yeah, they're going to get wallpaper for the living room and they go to wallpaper place and Marge is like, it's actually full of living room, but it's a very, very big room. It's like a state-in-peace living room.

So I want something that's like grand. I want to be very, very grand. It says, Michael Josephson, Macbeth Collection. I want something that's like, Joan Reavis would like it be like classic match, okay? It's a giant living room with confetti on the floor. So I want to make sure that I find something perfect, okay? Some grand, something grand to go with the waffle fries

that I serve on the silver platter. So I think when you're sitting in this grand living room, you can sit there and you can wait for the ovens to turn on, but you know what, guess what? They're never turning on. Classic match, classic match. If you left it after Joe, like if Joe had his way, we have, it would be so tacky in there.

It'd be like a guy, a guy living room. It'd be a motorcycle in the in the middle of the living room. Like it's art. Like it's not a Dolores. Is that a Dolores slam? Because Dolores' boyfriend literally does have a motorcycle in the middle of the living room. That's art. Yeah, I think actually to say a part is that probably a lot of guys in New Jersey have motorcycles as art. Like, you know, you know, those people, you know, who shops at the Porsche store? Who shops at the Ducati store and like doesn't get a Ducati? It's like these guys, these guys are the ones who get, who get like a backpack that says Porsche as if like the backpack is gonna go fast. What's going on with that? I don't get it. Like that's like, I'm sorry. It's hard to go into bed. I don't get it.

What's the matter? What's happening? All right, Frederic, I bought you a bunch of Porsche bags. Like, seriously? Literally? What do you have running water? No, but you've got a Porsche back. That's the guy that's the guy that's the thing.

Sorry, my, I feel like my, my Margaret Joseph's accent is teetering into Bethany today. It's like it's in a weird place today But I'm gonna try I'm gonna try to get it very back very very soon Okay, yeah, so they're in there and she's like look look how classy I am and look how stupid Joe is okay She's like hey Joe do you know what faux-bottom means and he's like is that when you say something wrong at a party? She's like, oh jeez, oh jeez, joke. That's not what it means. Okay. He's like, is that like that Swan liver?

He's like, no, it's goose liver. And all the stuff that's Fogua, that's Fogua. This is Foguo, okay. Okay, it's ridiculous. It's like, you know what, you know who taught me how to have Foguo? Joan Rivers, yeah, she taught me everything I know. Everything I know, she's a very smart woman.

I was a bit like a protégé, okay Like so just like just trust me on this on this wall paper, okay like classic match classic match Hey joke, did you ever hear Jones faux bar joke? You just did okay? He's like Mr. Cranky pants today like you didn't you didn't ask me bad anything from last night Okay, Joe like I had so many things that happened last night You didn't ask me one single one like I had a bread basket. Okay, it was great bet Do you know if it was sesame bread or is it raw or sourdough? You don't know you don't know what these things He's like okay, I threw away my relationship with my children to be with you

You don't you didn't even ask me about my night job It's okay, so you went out and had fun with Danielle She's like, I don't get anything go out with you in your last night. That shows how much you don't even listen to me Just focus on getting that motorcycle in the middle of the living room. Okay, like a piece of art What you just did that was a faux pas show that was a faux That shows how much you don't even listen to me. You just focus on getting that motorcycle in the middle of the living room, okay? Like a piece of art. What you just did, that was a faux pas. So that was a faux pas. Okay, you're learning.

You know what, Joe, I'm gonna put what you just did. I'm just gonna like slather around the wall and that'll be a wallpaper. Just a giant, Joe faux pas. We'll call it a Joe Pa classic Joan right there. We're gonna take out the confetti though, cause it won't match. Okay.

Unless we wanna go for something eclectic. It's like very micro-josis. You know, it's like the Macbeth collection. Okay. Unless we want to go for something eclectic, it's like very macruchosis, you know, it's like the Macbeth collection. It's like, have something very, very eclectic, like confetti in the floor, Joe Pa on the walls, it's like a whole statement, but no motorcycle in the middle, okay? Like literally, I can't.

Your new name is Joe Pa, okay? Joe Pa, classic match. Classic match. That was a Joe Pa. You just got John's classic match. Classic match. You know, when Joan would say something, they'd be called a Joan Pa.

So really, it's just like the legacy of Joan. That was real awkward when a Pa died. Tell you, someone go tell Margot down the street to come over and light up a oven for us so we can celebrate something over some. So big this Joe Pa over some waffle fries. Frinksy Shion. Hey, Ksyusha Shion, they ask if we could use ovens.

Okay. They that's a Joan Pa right there. Hey, let's get Joni number one, Joni number two, and Jon River's number three. Okay. Have them all come over. Well, just to get city on the confetti floor, look at the wallpaper, talk about your Joe Pa's, and talk about how classic this classic matches right now. The only one we're not inviting is the Jony the Dated Chate. Okay. Like I can't with her. But we'll invite Jody five through seven, okay? So she's talking about how she went to lunch with Dolores and they decided that they're going to have compassion for each other because they have kids the same age.

Which I don't know. I mean, I guess I guess that's a reason. Well, no, I think I thought it was because the sea, no, I think it was, they're having compassion because the Laura's understood her. And she was like, you know, I thought I'd be, I thought I'd be getting along better with, with the SIGI quite frankly, you know, SIGI's step son

and my step son graduated the same year from high school. And I always thought we had mutual respect for each other. Oh, very low bar for setting up for having mutual respect. I can turn the same yearbook practically. Listen, we both have loyalty cards to AMP, okay? We both shop at the same supermarket. I just thought we would have mutual respect based on that. We both got more than one free piece to left on a domino's delivery, okay? Listen, we both secretly like quiz nose more than Subway.

I'm sorry, that's just the way it is, classic match. I thought we just have mutual respect, just how we have mutual respect for a toasted sub. We're both willing to pay the 10 cents to get a plastic bag at the store instead of buying one of those stupid cloth bags, okay? Like I thought this would be it. We'll be best friends forever, okay?

You know what, we both, we're not gonna pay a lot for this muffler, okay? And I thought that bonded us So stupid, okay, so Honestly, mine a key. It's not there's not stupid. It's it's a place for respect and and intelligence Mine a key is yours a key, okay? That was a joke you just got Jones You know what you know what double a mco. Okay We both got triple a I think it would be friends

I promise myself I would I would never I would never body shame the might as man, but you know what I feel like that's I'm going down that path I would never body shame the mightest man, but you know what? I feel like that's I'm going down that path. All right, so Dolores is very serious at a restaurant. And it's for we were reminded before you before you go on to Dolores, there was something I really enjoyed because Marge started crying about our kids again. And and our husband Joe was like, listen, hey, man, don't worry. I'm going to help you get through it. It was, yeah, you will because you can help you in a fixed living room because

why do you always bring the living room into it no matter what we talk about you bring the living room into it. It keeps my mind busy okay. Would you rather me do the living room would go back on tour okay? Your choice. So yes Dolores is meeting tree and you did you receive where they were meeting? Rails. Rails. Someone who were real teeny make it extra strong. Now so people are reminding us online that Dolores is an ex-like cop or is your corrections officer or something like that.

She's an ex cop. She's nice to talk to you. Yeah. Yeah, it makes everything make so much more sense. Just like when her eyes half and she just looks, you're like, mm, no, her, like, obviously not the entire episode, I was like, ooh, her detective side is out. This is her, I'm talking to a perp, you know? Well, she literally was, I mean, in this case. Yeah, that's true. Sure, you're still like, I didn't know you could interview me again

So Dolores is very serious. She's got like her detective face on and she's like you know what? I'll just have a coffee with green and some calamari Dolores She loves coffee and calamari Hey until you try it. Don't knock it. Okay. I've been loyal to this Calamari and I said I was gonna get the Calamari And I'm getting it even though I want coffee, okay? So don't talk to me about what I should order scumbag I didn't say anything about you what you ordered with your Calamari. You know what? You know, I think that's quid's on drugs, okay? I think so I'm testing that that squid for drug residue. So, so basically there's Dolores and Teresa are talking about their situation because Danielle

had said that Dolores said that Teresa is only out for money. So now Teresa is getting Dolores is side story and Dolores like, okay, come on, just put it all out there, okay? Come on, where were you on the night of December 31st, 2018, 14, okay? Let's just talk, let's just talk. You know, I'm not gonna do anything bad. I want you to drop, you're like, I gotta be the good cop

and the bad cop at the same time. Yeah, Dolores, Dolores stands up and just sits on the side of the table. It has like pulls out a manila envelope. You know, I got a fad right here to be said. It says that you may have gone to Michael's to get a Christmas wreath. And I'm willing to overlook this right now.

If you tell me the truth of what you and Danielle were talking about. You can trust me. You want to die in Coke? You want to go off? Would you like some coffee with some calamari? Come on, I'm the nice. I'm the nice cup. I'm so bad at cap, too. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha All right, Trey, you get one chance and one chance only to tell me everything you know about what this bitch said about me

Joe did it. I don't know nothing That's like Trey's his entire Tramp script. I've just read you right there. We failed at the thumbs as wrongs so So Trey's to tell Her side story what she's heard and the Lord Lord's like, you're believing some crazy bitch of a me right now. And she's like,

that, right, right. Teresa's like, why would she lie? Why would she lie? Why would she lie? Hello. What do you think she would lie? He idiot. She's a housewife.

She's trying to get into scenes, okay? She still wasn't handed like the Jersey map or like the fucking Serran wrapped you know to the sandwich to the sandwich the machine we're holding in the beginning of this like a like a like a like a like a ice cream cone filled with egg salad from cafes oh poor cafes kaffati I can't I can't believe kaffati didn't last. It's a cafe where you get your face shells done. Kaffati, that's classic Caroline. Let me tell you something about branding.

You want to be as literal as possible. It's a cafe where you get your face done. Kaffati, it's a shoe store where you can also get a massage shoe-sage and Also worried to hit on somebody that you don't like, but don't talk about it. Oh, Caroline man. So I miss your bad hair Yeah, so Teresa, you know Teresa's idea of friendship is so fucked up. She's like well, all right You want me to start me? All right, I'm trying to wrap my head around it. Okay. I'm trying to wrap my head Like your whole vibe. Like you haven't been sticking up for me.

I can floor it out. Like you didn't stick up for me. It's like shut up. That's not friendship, okay? Your friends aren't just supposed to like stand in front of you and take bullets. It's not like the front line. Oh war.

It is the same woman who like last week got mad at her brother for being, for saying, hey, that's my wife. Oh, I can't say that that's my wife. You know what he's doing? He's taking up for his wife. Isn't that what you want? Tree? Isn't that what you want?

Yeah, I would like to say she's a hypocrite, but I think she just forgets what she said, like moments of moment. She forgets how different it goes with us. Yeah, so Dolores, I just want to give you this advisory. Don't trust her. Okay, just don't trust her. Because you know what?

I think she's doing drugs. I think she's on medication. She's doing drugs or something. She may be mainline in heroin. I don't know. I don't know what's going on. I talked to Maz about it. I was like, Maz, what's going on? He's like, listen, why don't you work? I said because I think this girl's on drugs and like I got a lot of my mind. You remember when I gave drugs to Boo when he was dying? It was the end of his care. It was sad, but now Boo's gone. I got new cabinets, Frank's moving in. It it's a lot it's a lot to take in Chum chum It's like lot the most boring lawn order ever Lauren order special rails victims So Teresa's like drags, huh, but wait a minute she does yoga's

She even does the tree pose that's so supportive. Like, Dolores is like, well you don't have my back either, okay? You're making fun of my relationship with Frank with Frankie. Like, both Frank's. I don't even know which one, but I know you're doing something wrong. And she's like, well, why the hell would you want it back after 18 years though? Okay, Teresa. So it's okay for you you and good for Dolores because Dolores is like Look 20 years ago. I didn't want to put up with the stuff that you wanted to put up with okay for all of this time Okay, what what you think I don't have magazines from the grocery store

And truth and truth is like well, I you're saying that what you're saying that you think that Joe cheated on me Is that what you saying because I don't know what you're talking about speak speak English. She's like oh no I I wasn't saying that at all. I just meant that Frank was really bad at Rewinding tapes and returning them to blockbuster Yeah, I just meant to say that back then Frank wouldn't put together a chair, you know, just like Joe But now he's doing it. He's still doing it in the living room with little Frankie.

I still put together a, how about that? So Teresa's like, look, maybe I got wax in my hearings. But I don't understand this right now. And Dolores is like, look, I don't want to have to whip out an iPad to show you the clip of your husband Like talking to some hoe against the tree in a where were they like a winery or something in that yeah, exactly I call you the seaword. Yeah, exactly. So let's just let's just enjoy our coffee in Calamari. Is what a delicious Combination well, I like that. Yeah Dolores is is like listen I have to be diplomatic right now that's that's just the way I am like yeah you just erred her shit on national TV real diplomatic but it was so good it was such a

great moment to say Dolores is really killing it this season. She is and she knows Teresa so well that she just knows how to shut Teresa up she's like okay you want me to talk about your affairs no okay let's let it go she's like, okay, you want me to talk about your affairs? No, okay, let's let it go. She's like, yeah, good This feels great. Okay, look if I Danielle look if I had to decide I'd say like to your face that I would believe you now What I'm gonna say to Danielle's face might be something different, but Laura says I good with friends All right, go do not leave the country, please. Don't leave town, okay? We might be calling you in for some more questions.

She's like, eh, eh. So we then head over to Siggy's house where she's making a huge Sunday. I was really into that moment. I was like, really halfway out the door to make my own Sunday. And Dolores comes over and Siggy's like, I can't fit into my jeans. It's disgusting.

Why eating like that then? Come on. What's wrong with you? I'm having one of those days. Now you ask why am I having one of those days? Let's like no one asked that. But please keep answering yourself questions with your prop pie that you've made to throw in someone's face. I think the Lord is like, what are you doing? That's so funny to me. Cause that's what it was. He's like, look at me. This is how I meet when I'm stressed, right ladies? No one eats like that when they're stressed. You're talking to a binger here, lady, okay? Oh, but I was thinking to myself, I was like, oh, man, I would love to stress eat like that the thing is I never have ice cream and

fudge and whipped cream and sprinkles in my apartment at all at one time I might have I might have ice cream I might even on a good day have have like even fudge too but I'm not gonna have all those components like that's she planned ahead to be stressed to stress eat yeah that's that's what she did when you're a stress eater. I'll find a whole weekend of my guys I'm going to be depressed on purpose this week. Do not call me. So she's like, I'm so depressed. Michael Campanello wants me to slow down.

But overnight retreats are the next step in my career. Everyone says the same thing. We want more thinking. Who are these people? Every time I have dinner with my parents all I hear is we want more Ziggy. So here I am giving myself to the people like Ziggy, we want you for us. Yeah, okay, a Vita. So for us. Yeah, okay, O'Vita. So, um, Siggi Vita. Siggi Vita. It feels so weird being so far from my microphone, by the way. Um, I keep trying to get up close to it and I feel so cut off from my microphone. Okay, so she's like, they want more Siggi. She goes, I need to figure out how to juggle. But then I that's another job and Michael Campanella will be so upset if I'm successful in another career

Michael Nala It's like what you're juggling now too. I really need you to be at home more Listen, I don't know if I am comfortable you being in the bottom and barely is okay. I need you. I've been circ to SIGGI. When I was a child I was made fun of because they said I look like an acrobat. They called me acrobatty. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha I remember as a little girl, people made fun of me so badly at what's went to see a movie and they made a whole movie about me

It was about an elephant that had giant giant ears and would go to the circus and fly around I was like I'm not an elephant, I'm not in the circus. How could you do that to me? Yeah, that they called me Dumb-O-O Yeah, I was gonna say you're talking about the movie Dumb-O right now. How could you call me that? The Lauren You know, there's still some parts of Brooklyn where they make fun of me. That's right. There's a whole neighborhood called Dumbo. I'm like, why? So, uh, Dolores is, you can tell Dolores is kind of wearing thin. It's like when you really believe

in that prisoner on parole and you're like, I'm going to really help you get the best job, prepping food at the restaurant, you know, and then they just keep fucking up and you're like, but I believed in you. And our party told my boss that I believe in you and you're fucking up. She's just looking at her like, you go in off the rails girl. You go in off the rails. Hey, I know that because I was just eating at rails. You were there.

I was like eating at rails I got a rail ten years she said no I can't do it I'm off the rails Did I tell you what I made Teresa mix the coffee with Calamari it was hilarious My goodness, okay, so basically Zig Ziggy's like, I booked Crystal Springs. I want to try out a woman's empowerment seminar. Okay, I want to try it out with my friends first. It's going to be all about positive women, me and a divorce attorney. How is that an empowering seminar led by a divorce attorney? Come on. This will show you that even if you get canceled off of Bravo, you can still come back on the

network in some strange capacity. She is woman here, her up jacked. So she's gonna do it and she's like, I don't wanna beat me. So I was thinking of inviting Ma great. And Dolores is like, are you sure? She's like, maybe she's just a princess. And she's like, all right. And she goes, now you gotta hug, you gotta hug Danielle.

No she's not really. Yeah, Ziggy was like, she was like, I'm gonna probably invite Danielle. She's like, yeah, I'm gonna invite her, I don't care, I might that stupid bitch. She's like, yeah, but think he was like she's like I'm gonna probably invite Daniel She's like yeah, I went by it around here. I don't like that stupid bitch She's like yeah, but you know she's gonna want hug you. She's gonna want to hug you And then Dolores is like yeah, man, that's fine. I was a cop. I hugged a lot of prostitutes in my time Tell me I'm gonna have it. I'll have a hug me while she's squatting so I can see if she's hiding any drugs up on her Up on a pulse, okay

What's wrong with that? So over in a non-rails location so I can see if she's hiding any drugs up on her. Up on the police, okay? What's wrong with that? So over in a non-rails location, Melissa and Margaret go and have lunch. And Melissa has some really interesting insights about kids. She's like, you know what's funny is that when I was a little, when the kids were little, I thought they were so hard and they were gonna get easier, but now they're getting harder.

They all have like an agenda and they have to do things. It's like hard, like life is hard. Yeah. She says the agenda like five times. Yeah. Like you give this woman an eye call and her head's gonna explode. Yeah. And Margaret's like, oh great, great observations. Einstein there. You know, that's a Joan right there. You don't even know who Joan is. Do you know? You think Joan is like something about like Joan of Arc. You don't even know who she is. Either you think Joan of Arc was, was Noah classic? That was like three Jones and a row right there for you. Classic match.

That was so smart, Melissa. No wonder they've named a bagel stop after you. Classic, Joan. Do you get it? Do you get it? No. All right. I'll take a bagel.

I don't even know why I'm craving a bagel right now. Classic, Joan. Classic match. So basically, this is Melissa's way of being like, I'm just having trouble because, you know, like, it's so hard in life and I just wanted to do something having trouble because, you know, like it's so hard in life And I just wanted to do something to make envy, you know, I just wanted to like separate it out from all the other boutiques out there And so I'm like, oh well you know how, you can come down to my showroom, you can meet Marge Sienia, you can meet my crazy girl from Cheshire who serve as in Jusy accent Her name is Lexi, she's hilarious

You can meet the whole Posse, you can even meet Joe, he's looking at wallpaper so we got confetti in the floor You can meet Margo down the street, she's got a great oven, it works like butter, it's like a butter oven, it's an oven for butter. You can see the wallpaper we picked out, it's crazy. I mean better than a motorcycle on the floor on my right, I'm still using that one, that's right. I took that one on, I'm so glad you told me about that, it's a piece of art. Like Joe thinks like honestly, we're gonna put a jucati in the middle of the living room, it's gonna be so far like it's like it's a piano or something like that Like please can you play a jucati? I don't think so. Okay, Mozart never played it to cut it

Doesn't Joan right there a little Joan for you. Hey, Melissa your store already stands out from everybody else's you only have size twos Didn't we learn that last year? We've got Betsy not sin was like that's not something Hey, we need more than five thousand here. She's like, no, we don't. Yes, we do. No, we don't. We're not going to have anything other than

size zero and size two. So she's like, that's disgusting. Yeah, she's like, we are not having a plus size shop. A size three is not plus size. Hey, listen, she's like, I won't even have a batteries because there's a plus on them, okay?

I want zero batteries. Listen, just because you blow out someone else's candle doesn't mean you're going to shine any brighter, am I right? Okay, that's a classic mod saying right there. You know what? You don't have to be suspicious when you got mod, mod, mod, fuchsius, okay? Mods fuchsius. Oh, speaking of wallpaper fuchsius, it was great.

Hey, do you know what a faux-bies, yeah, I didn't think, no one knows what that is, what am I the only person? She's like, yeah, a fat upper pussy area, no, not a fupa. She's like, yeah, I got that taken out already. Oh, Lord. So yeah, Melissa's just like, make me successful like you, which isn't really how it works, but, you know,

I like that Marge will help her. And she's like, look, can you believe I was invited to this woman's empowerment thing too? Like I'm really looking forward to it. I mean, yeah, like you said, blowing out of candle doesn't mean you'll shine brighter. It actually does. I mean, I don't know who came up with that saying, but like it literally does mean you'll sign brighter. It actually does. I mean, I don't know who came up with that saying,

but like it literally does mean you'll sign brighter. Well, the candle, no, no. The candle, the candle will not shine brighter. The candle will shine as strong as before. In fact, the room will be darker if you blow out the someone else's candle. Yes, but people will be more dependent on your light. That's true.

It will be the light that people are looking at. That's about a housewife. Exactly. Now, that's the part of the analogy. That's the fun part. I'm not gonna shine any brighter, but people will need me more. Yes, exactly. I won't shine brighter, but I'll certainly shine better than you, bitch, candle. Good luck with your life, Lumiere. sex techno your words. I have sex no decandal break. She burned out my candle. La bra. I'm going blah blah. I'm going to la blah blah.

I have sex. She burned out my candle. Second extensive candle reference of the week on Broadway. So let's see here. She's like, they decided to talk shit about Ziggy, but Margaret's like, oh my God, I got a text. I'm going to go to this women's empowerment event. I'm going. Is that crazy? Like, is that nuts? And she's like, Dolores must have talked to her because I talked to Dolores, and I

reminded her that our sons have the same number outside the ear book. Must've worked, totally worked. So I reminded the, speaking of books I reminded the lures that one time our sons ran into each other at bonds and no bull. I was like, which one's bonds and which one's no bull on the classic match? And Melissa's like, well, I'll still support her because you know, it's like some place I can shoot. But I just hope we don't get a sicky display of anger. And I was like, wait, is that a new sickness

that she's trying to make work? S-D-A, I don't know, Melissa. You're talking to a lady who invented Saki, learned something, Melissa. Come on. Melissa's like, just be careful because you're like a quote unquote friend stealer and she's like, you have to do some three,

three-hale marriage repent for stealing friends. She's like, oh, yeah, I'm the virgin Margaret classic much little pun right there I took a virgin Mary and I made a virgin mod. Okay. It's like hilarious. I told my mother about it She's far from being a virgin. You know what she is like Judas Judas times 10. Okay, except she doesn't backstab She's back fucks. You know what I'm saying? She's hilarious These days she can't even blame her. I mean 30 pieces of gold. That's like a decent payment. Like who's gonna like classic, classic virgin Margie. You know what Frank, Frank and Sensen Murrow.

How about Frank and Sensen last, you know what I'm saying? How about Frank and Sensen wallpaper? That's what Jesus really needed, okay? Like you think he wanted to be born in a ugly barn? Like that place got to use some like decent faux bar, okay? You know what I think, you know who I think needs some Frank and Sensen? I think some Sige. I think she needs some Frank and Sensen out there and you know what I think you know who I think needs some frankincense I think some sige I think she needs some frankincense knocked into that you know what I'm saying I mean she's like crazy she's like

as crazy as like a piece of motorcycle uses a piece of art okay she needs a frankin pellet okay classic my my mind my mind is always turning into a boss and acts I just want everyone to be aware of like visit at yeah mad mad she went up to back she went up to Southy So now they all oh Lucky he's happy with Michael Pampano My my friend was like I thought we said we're gonna slow down She's like you wrapped up that our last episode. Don't you remember when you said you were okay with it? He's like okay. I've still got the pages out. She's like put away the pages

We've already done that did I tell you about the cake? It's like, oh jeez. Margaret is also, I think she's packing or something, and she's just like, you know what? Ziggy, she wants to make up with the mod. She wants to make up with the mod. She'll be great. And the assistant is behind her, and she's like,

just don't let her come up behind her. She's like, whatever you do, make sure she doesn her come up behind you. Which is like, she's like, whatever you do, make sure she doesn't come up behind you, or else they'll be terrible. Flowers, Sarah. So let's see, I'll just say he's like, Oh, Dolores told me to invite Margaret, and if June 1,5 days she says,

I don't like Siggie Fl flicker, I'll say fun. Go. I just had to say fun. Goal because like how often do we get to say that? Yeah, never. I would say that right. I don't know. So Frank's at home cleaning and he's like, look, I know you think I'm your bitch, okay?

And she's like, there's nothing wrong with that Frankie, huh? And he's like, I'm an alpha male. You're saying that while you're holding a mop, Frank. It's not my fault all of a sudden doesn't know how to pour the pasta into the bowl, okay? I got a mop up after him every single time. I just made him super Italian. I know, it's like no, no living over at Dolores's house. He's like, oh!

He's like, you know what? I'm not your bit. Just because he asked me to go pick up something up, I'm upstairs, I'm not your bit, okay? I'm here to mop and that's it. It's like, okay know what? I'm not your bit. Just because he asked me to go pick up something up. I'm upstairs. I'm not your bit. Okay. I'm here to mop and that's it. It's okay, Frank. Come down. So now it's time to go to the retreat. Yes.

Unless I miss something. I think everyone's going. It's rainy out. So Melissa shows up at, I guess the party bus is arriving at trees place, so everyone's convening there. So Melissa's there with Teresa. And like I like how Melissa just goes and gets into the boss and leaves her bag for Teresa to carry. And Teresa's like, I'm trying to come down

to stairs with a nugget of these heels on, but I couldn't do it. Okay, I'm gonna do it now. I was like, take off your shoes. Yeah, it's so hard. She's like, wait, it's I need it. Like Joe would have carried that down. He would have been like throwing it over the side of the fucking balcony. Yeah. Joe was a real prince. Yeah, so yeah, exactly. So they go to the bus and then we get a clip of, well, Teresa's like, oh yeah, sticky, organic

advice. It's like crazy. We haven't seen each other since they're tasting. And then we get a clip of, this money of fucking business, how about that? Which is my new favorite Dolores line of all time, or moment of all time. Yeah. So the cup and cup, Dolores and Marg.

Yeah, Margin Danielle show up. Everyone basically pop, and Dolores gives Danielle such a Really cold hell out like hello, you know Because Danielle does like to the how are you? Hello everyone. How are you do we put my bags in the back? What's going on with the pay attention? Police Dolores literally put her head down and just like go layered at her She's like, yeah, so cocaine Dol So cocaine's a loris, Jesus. Druggy and aisle three back there.

So, sorry man, you can have to step to decide for an alternate search method. She's like TSA. She's every kind of prop there is. Do you have a global entry? I tell you one thing a lot of people on the globe invented her so Siggy so they all they all see you arrives. I said see you ride that place So I don't know if that means she arrived at bus or she arrived or when they arrive at the Like we hope you enjoy your stay ma'am at Crystal Springs and she's like, hey, oh, we can enjoy myself when I'm here Thank you. Hi, Brent me. Hi, Auntie Lolo Hi, Pedro. Hi, Elf on the shelf

Like per your request. We have bolted down all cakes and pastry platters. Thank you! All the croissants are like on one of those, like those little chains. They have the man at the post office with pens. It's like you'd eat it up a chain. Don't you dare try to throw that chocolate croissants! Someone baked that for you! Ugh.

So she goes to her team in the screening room and she's like, we're gonna power women. She I've lift women up and she helps tear apart their marriages. This fucking show. So Margaret back in the van with the girl, she's like, look, I'm really glad to be invited. Like seriously, I'm really glad to be here. It's like classic March in the second season of the bus, like never in the front. You know, you know, who never sat in the front too?

Joe, never did. So I'm fine, right? The thing is, I don't know if anyone saw Instagram, but like, Sikki, she's like, I don't know. She's like the Hunger Games, which I find hard to believe. And the Laura's obviously just saw her get that whole Sunday. So like, but I think it's talking about me.

And then she reads it. And people, people posted the entire post. Did you see it? Oh god, now I have to find it. OK, well, then you posted a new one. I think she posted a new, she posted a new version of it, I think. OK.

Because she post, because there's this one where it's her with the bow and arrow. And then I think that I think, because the one that I read read today was like my name is Sigurdit Barosanova. So I was like I think this is a response the last night but either way whatever the post was it said something like hey this gonna hate the last thing you want is me hating on your ass because the way I hate on your ass is that I take off your door and then I smother you with kisses because I love you so much. Why won't you respond? Talk back to me, Joshua. Why? Why are you masturbating? Do you want me to come watch? Would you like me to do that? No? Okay, like wow, this is a strange Instagram post.

Also, she literally, I think, did photograph. She photoshopped her face on top of the Hunger Games girl, which is hilarious. But she's like, my name is Sigilit translating from Hebrew to English as a violet This flower symbolizes a mind possessed by love in a world full of weeds Where it feels like breaking news of violence hate and bullying Bolly A is constant. We need more violence to fill out the meadows. Make no mistake. I may be passionate about love and horror mojis, but I am no shrinking violet. I am always gonna stand up for what I believe in and for what I know is right. And if this is happening to you in your life by someone who thinks she's more joking you. I encourage you not to live in fear and

Stantle and strong for what you're passionate about Never fear rejection for it is protection Rejection is protection. What the fuck are you even talking about? Don't let your ego be your amigo Also don't let Margaret be your amigo. And when things get tough, always remember, jeez fries. Stand tall, stand proud.

Voices that care are crying and out loud. I love that she's making it sound like she's head of a bullying campaign because of Margaret. I know, and by the way, don't go on on about how your name means violet and you are a violet. And you have a picture of you with a bow and arrow Okay, like it doesn't work that way. Okay, you when you do that means you put up a picture of your face super moose I'm violet from Charlie talk of factory. Okay, that's okay. Yeah, okay

Not why am I so blown it? They're rolling her off So yeah, Margaret's like I think this is directed at me. I mean, it's pretty obvious that she's like just directing this at me. Like, what am I supposed to do? She's like crazy. It's like, I'm trying to be friends with it. And all she's doing is just like, pushing these crazy things like, oh my god, I'm gonna

get my head chopped off at this like retreat. It's supposed to be a retreat for building people up and all she's going to do is take me down to be a public humiliation. It's like classic magic, except reverse. It's like classic, the city. Or should I say soggy? That's what the name is these days, soggy. I'm like, like, magey. Like, she's like, she's like a mug, but she's soggy. She's like classic match except reverse. It's like classic. Siggie. Oh should I say soggy? That's what the name is these days Sagi I'm like magey like she's like she's like a mug, but she's soggy. She's like a song. She's like a mage

I'm like okay, okay, Margaret And Melissa is reading it out loud and the one the original one I guess said you come from me sideways I come for you sideways. I was like what are you fighting crabs? Like why do you guys Come to each other sideways? I just kept thinking of are you fighting crabs? Like, why do you guys need to come at each other sideways? I just kept thinking of those crabs in Mexico's running sideways. Mexico's, I'm not feeling like Teresa. I thought she was just very angry at an Alexander pain movie. Oh, not Alexander pain, Alexander was his face.

Alexander pain? I don't remember. Sideways, I don't like, Mervlo, Eva. What was that, why that he hated? Did he hate Marlowe? I don't know. I think it was Marlowe. Yeah, it was Marlowe? I don't know. I think it was Marlowe.

Yeah. It was Marlowe. Yeah. You come from me Santa Barbara. I come from you. I don't even know if I'm talking about anymore. And Dolores is trying to stand up for a SIGGI. But there's really not.

I mean SIGGI just keeps on and keeps on. And Dolores is like, well, I didn't see it that way. To me, it didn't look like she was talking about, yeah. Okay. Dolores. Well, thanks for trying. At least no one can say you didn't try. Yeah. So for it, uh, crystal springs, which just makes me really thirsty, because it sounds like crystal guys are reminiscent of crystal lake where people are harder. So, well, I'm not in reals. Because I was not in reals. I was on the game. So, sue me. not in reals. Because I was not in the hunger game, so sue me.

I was stressed hungry. Jason, for his, why don't you kill us with love instead of a knife, Jason? Celebrity beef, you never know if you're just gonna end up on TMZ or trending on Twitter or in court. I'm Matt Bellasife. And I'm Sydney Battle, and we're the host of Wonder Woman's new podcast, Dis and Tell. Each episode explores a different iconic celebrity feud, from the build-up, why it happened, and the repercussions. What does our obsession with these feud say about us?

We're starting off with a pretty messy love triangle between Selena Gomez and Justin and Haley Bieber, a seemingly innocent tick-tock of Selena talking about her laminated eyebrows. It's snowballed into a full-blown alleged feud. But it doesn't seem like fans are letting up anytime soon. Despite both Selena and the Bieber's making public statements denying any bad blood. How much of this is teen jealousy and lovers quarreling, and how much of it is a carefully crafted narrative designed to sell albums? Follow this and tell wherever you get your podcasts.

You can listen ad-free on the Amazon music or wonder ya. What if Siggie's Hunger Games was just because she was being bullied? It's like that was the whole thing. There is no slave race that is being forced to murder each other. It's just like hungry people that show up. They're fighting over a Sunday. Someone shot a cannon! So the guests are... every time someone throws a cake, a cannon goes off. every time someone throws a cake a cat and goes off. So, um, uh, so I guess everyone is arriving and taking his like, Dolores, Theresa, Margaret Dolores again.

I can never give Dolores to my Daniel. Let's go back to Dolores. Oh, God, oh, God. And Margaret's like, well well that was a nice hug so maybe the bow and arrow post wasn't directed at me you know maybe it wasn't I mean she did hug me sideways that was weird stranger felt like I had a magnet a horseshoe around my waist I was like what is going on here this is crazy this is a crazy retreat

I'll tell you what I want to retreat back to New Jersey I want to treat how about that? I want to treat. Here's my memo. I want to bully treat. To eat while Margaret bullies me with the spirit. I'm going to write a memo. It's called retreats.

Okay, it's a retreat. Okay, I want to I want some I want some twigs because twigs are on for kids. I guess what I know that's a serial, but it's also in my case, it's also regarding the candy bar. They're not for kids. They're for me. Classic match. So she gives a speech for the women's empowerment thing or the divorce attorney, Vicki, I think

starts it. She has. And she's like, look, what we're here to do is to be vulnerable. We want it to be open. Okay. Also, we want everybody to purchase a hashtag shirt. Okay. Open, okay? Also, we want everybody to purchase a hashtag shirt, okay? Hashtag no you're worth, okay? Those are worth $20. Guess who knows the worth? The hashtag shirts, okay? Thank you for coming. I want everyone to get naked Emotionally naked, okay, let's get real. Let's get raw. Let's get naked. I'm like, let's get some prep Okay, because this is going in a dark place. Yeah, I'm not kidding She's like, let's bear back. Okay. That's what I want. I want from everybody

Right let's share some needles let's share some needles of love and inspiration. Okay. I'm gonna inject you love inspiration And we're gonna share them, okay And I like that. Siggiggies like that's a tagline Get naked emotionally like oh my god when these ladies find naked juice They're gonna like freak out. Yeah, so they get up there and they're like they're they're giving their inspiration and just all cliches What other people say about you is none of your business? It's like I heard that from Lisa Rina on Real Housewives of Beverly Hills for free. Yeah, yeah.

Said, don't cry over spilled milk. Don't judge a book if you don't like its cover. They're just gonna start doing them all wrong. You can't have your cake and eat it too or throw it. Oh, I'm bullied. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Corris, they just know all these clips of Instagram memes that they've stolen from like better people. And then Ziggy's like, okay, let's take some questions. Is Martin Horrible Human being? Yes, he is. Okay, now how about you?

And of course, the ladies are just like, what is it like being on real housewives of New Jersey? Okay, and I have your autograph. Is there any way to take the seat belt off of the Danish's? Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha I've a break to stand up and say fuck you! Am I right, Marge? I'm not like, she's like, this is crazy. Okay, you know what? Like she's obviously talking about me. I understand exactly what's going on with her. I know what she's saying. She's crazy to me. She's crazy. And of course, Melissa's like,

oh my god, she's gonna publicly shame her. Like, she shamed me about the cake publicly. Yes. You're a victim. You're the real victim here, Melissa. So Siggy then launches into her her tragic backstortious when I was younger I was bullied for my name sigillite paladiel and you know what I was called the Ziggy Squiggy Ziggy the sea monster Miss Piggy and cigarette it was not right. I was also called Sig alert. Sig...

Sig Newton. Sig. Ha ha ha. SIG ANOMATRY. I'm not even shoving in. I'm just gonna... No, I'm not trying to think of like Sig Gull. Ha ha ha ha.

Ssst, Steven Sigal. I mean, the worst was cigarettes. All the way through high school, I had the way where assigned it says, make cause cancer. It was bullying. She's like, they make me stand 15 feet away from that drink says. You know, I think she raised, I think she brought up Siggie the C monster last year because it sounds familiar

i mean girl if that's your bullying it's have a seat that's a very adorable bullying by the way yeah c-monster yes like what oh people made you too cute yeah they're horrible um yeah i i mean i do not feel like

even when sat piece of saddest, because if she really felt like that was bullying, look, the woman has 10 faces, okay? She's gone through many faces, she's not ashamed of it, which she shouldn't be. If you can change your face that many times, you can change your name, okay?

There's a reason somebody keeps the name Sige Flicka. Yeah, well, you know, the thing is, I mean, I get it, like, I was bullied when I was a kid, but like, you know, not dramatically., I mean, I get it. Like, I was bullied when I was a kid, but like, you know, not dramatically. I think I got like standard bullying. And, you know, my brother, you know, like, you know, my older brother is always called me Mr. and I think what was it called is Mr. Benjamin Wow. I was like, wow, you call me Wow Want?

Because I would cry and always say that I wanted things. So it was like, you call me a Wow Want? Because I was like, wow, I want this, wow, I was born. Waw, I want this, waw, I want that. So like, he called me Sikhi the the Sikhi wawant. Or he called me Mr. Benjamin Iwant, I think. But like, it was a very formal bullying. But the thing was that like, I mean, still like when he, it's kind of funny

because he recently called it to me, he called me that almost jokingly and I was like, oh, you know, but I also can laugh at myself for having that reaction because like I am no longer six years old and I can deal with it, you know. Yes, I just look to anybody who's really been bullied, it sucks, okay? Obviously, like to put it mildly and I'm not not gonna get into some victim war on a real housewives show But bitch, please people made funny your name shut up, Ziggy You're not being bullied because Margaret calls you soggy, okay?

And didn't she say soggy was one of the names. She's like, thank you so call me soggy or something and Margaret Every time she tries to fuck with Margaret Margaret takes it in the best way. She's like Well, you know like now I bond with her, because Ziggy cried about that thing. She's like, if I had known that that name was a bullying trigger, I never would have called to that, because she has childhood wounds, you know, I got it. I mean, I have wounds from my step-chalping,

you know, so it's sort of the same thing. You know, like her childhood wounds, the same age as my step-kids were, I don't know, but like that would be classic March, and I forget, like I'm totally sorry. You know, I get it, I'm very wounded. You know, the other day I was set kids were. I don't know, but like that would be classic March. And I forget, probably like I'm totally sorry. You know, I get it. I'm very wounded. You know, the other day I was looking at my jiffy lube receipt.

And I was like, wait a second, I forgot to get the punch here. And I thought, you know what? This is like so much of my childhood. I forgot to get the punch cut. You know, it's hard. Things are hard. I've never make fun of it for that. I don't know what that was all about.

But the, here's the thing though, is I think if Ziggy had said, when I was a kid, I was bullied all the time. People would like shove me into lockers, they would take my food, they'd just like, it's essentially made fun of me, and when people make fun of my name, it takes me that place. I actually would understand that more, but the Ziggy, like, I was called Ziggy instead of Ziggy. It was awful. A different

letter that sounds very much like S, but it's more of a labial fricative. It's difficult. It's a Z, instead of a S. I think that's what it was. I'm like, okay, Ben, you're going on this path. Let's see if you can reach into 20 years ago when you took that one linguistics class Let's see if you can remember those what those I remember I was like labial fricative buy fricative Got a little sonner and so she's calling Margaret out publicly and Margaret's like wow how brave and Siggy's like kevrick tough flaws of what makes us you need Kind of like there is nothing unique about this. And if it makes you unique, then why are you fucking crying all the time about it?

And I actually like Ziggy. I feel like we're two of the lovely people on Earth who love Ziggy. I still love her. Like I love Ziggy. And it doesn't mean I don't love Margaret, because obviously we love classic mods as well. But you know, Ziggy, you're like really pushing it too much. So she goes, all right.

Now that Margaret has learned about how to empower me as a woman, let's go to the zone room. I was like, is this laser tag now? What is happening? No, it's the auto zone room. I've one by a hubcap. Lydia's out there. I'm like, I'm air flowing through her. Wait, what? How did Lydia get into this? Because you know those big blow-up, those big blow-up dolls we always say Lydia's like, they have a good name.

And they're always like dancing in front of the auto places. Yes, sorry. Because I think I was still mumbling something about the zones. Why, Mr. Setup. I was like, what? No, it made no sense. Get into the zone. That's this typical Thursday show today. For just like, what? No, I've made no sense. Get into the zone.

That's this typical Thursday show today. For just like what? What did I just say? I want everyone to meet my good friend. Oh, oh, oh, oh, Riley. Autobots. Autobots. So she's like, I'm so excited about the zone room.

There's so many experts. As Vicki would say, let's get naked emotionally. So she starts reading down all of the stuff they have. And she's like, okay, we've got someone for the plastic surgery. We've got a manicurist. We've got a, she's like listening all this stuff. I'm like, yeah, women empowerment. I mean, I don't agree with Danielle often, but she's like, how was this empowering? It's like getting new tips. Yeah, exactly.

But I will say at least this retreat was better than Vicki Gunvelson's retreat that she had on a boat one time. Were one person showed up? Do you remember that? I think you could say that about every retreat ever. Yeah, that's true too. And you know, say what you will about Sigi, but she was like, okay, mom recalled me to Sagi,

I'm gonna capitalize on it. Because she had the Sagi flicker t-shirts ready to go. For as much as she had to be in calling that, she certainly knew how to capitalize on it. Sagi flicker! Hashtagic gets better! So she's like, you can have some money, Margaret, from these shirts. And she's like, I think what can they do very well from these?

Um, so, let's- so now Teresa starts talking to Danielle and she's like so So you as I was talking to the lorises and stuff at Rails's and She was saying that like maybe you're trying to drive a wedges between us like I don't know like I do I thought you didn't like those salads and she's like no, no, of course not I'm not trying to drive a wedge at all between you guys, at all. I know you don't like blue cheese. I know you don't play golf.

I know you don't like simple machines. That's a little joke for people who like physics. Wedges are simple machines, levers and wedges, simple machines. Oh my God. So, trees is like. It's about,'s like, I gotta tell you, I told her, like, if I got a pick, and she goes, well, of course, she would pick Dolores, but only because you got a legion seat, it's not because she believed her. Like, well, she has a legion

star because she believes her stupid. No, but Danielle is smart. That's like she, you know, Teresa her brain like, do do do do do do do. So she's like, you're doing it because you're, you, you got loyalty to her because you got it. You're a good friend, but not because you believe her

because you know me. I'm telling the truth. I'm the one who's your friend now. Yeah, she's like, you know what I'm telling the truth. I'm literally doing a tree pose right now. Oh, that sounds like a polite answer. So of course we knew this was gonna happen.

Tree was like, so Danielle's, so like Dolores says that you're on drugs and stuff. That you're on drugs and that you might be high right now. And Danielle's like, I've heard that one before. She, you think she's the first one to say that to me? Hmm. She has no imagination whatsoever. Oh wait, she has an imaginary boyfriend. Zing-a-ga-ga. Zing-a-ga.

Would you like to do a real? Ha-ha-ha-ha. I didn't meant that this week. Come here. Okay. So first of all, she does not have a imaginary boy for a demand. We've seen him.

I love how Danielle just makes shit up in her mind And I don't think Dolores is really that far off about Danielle And so Sige back in the background is going as tree would say Namaste Well glad you stole some shirts. Yes, so in their rooms Margaret is gonna stay with Dolores and Sikki because Sikki is just wanting... She needs a new chapter in her bullying story, okay? The Trevor project is like, look, we've got some more server space.

Could you send us another video full of your pain that Margaret caused you? She's like, we'll share my room! So they're there and they're like chatting about, you know, the stuff they have to work on in their lives and the loris is like, you know what, I have trust issues. I'm a conspiracy theorist. I'm like, really? You're just accused Daniel of being high on drugs based off of nothing really. So yes, I would agree you do it. You are a conspiracy theorist and never change, never change. Never change. So Margaret's like, well, I appreciate you put me in a room with you. Because like, that was a crazy time that we had. That was crazy. And sick.

I love, by the way, I love, I love listening to you transition from one voice to another when you start off with a wrong accent. Yeah. Yeah. Sikki takes me a minute because you have to put her in a certain play and you have to make your face like this. Like Margaret. Like Sikki.

Margaret, yeah. You got it? No's like sticky. A Margaret, yeah. You got it? No, no, yeah. Margaret, yeah. Yeah, Margaret. To Loris. Nevermind, I've got it. I don't even know.

Sorry, I ruined that. No, no, you didn't. I ruined it myself because I was like, where is Margaret's throat section? Where is it? I'm like, I'm going gonna think about it calmly quietly. Listen to, she's like obsessing of my throat, my throat section, like, she have anything better to do with herself. I like, how about this? How about you watch a small VHS of Joan Riverson really knows how to tell a joke? Okay, then you can be more like Joan like

I am. Okay, like classic match. You're more of a Melissa. So, let's see over in Danielle, Teresa, and Melissa's room. Danielle's like, what is this? Women empowerment. You got emotional issues. Get your face done. Like, what the hell is this? Then Margaret calls Joe on FaceTime.

And she's like, all right, I'm going to talk to you like this. And I'm shooting it from above. Do I look thin? And he's like, OK, I'm going to try it too. She's like, no, I don't want to see your Bob spot, Jeff. Seriously put it away. It's disgusting. Put it down.

Put it down. I don't care if you fat. Okay. It's better than being bald. Okay. All right. Now let's spend the next five minutes trying to hang up on each other. Okay.

All right. I mean, press the, I mean, press off. No, it's still on. It's a lot. I'm like, it's like amazing. It's amazing. I'm entrusting you to put up the four part of the walls. You know, you don't even know how to turn off your phone right now.

It's crazy. No, no, Joe. You're still on. You're still on Joe. No, you're still, yes, I'm very much aware that you don't know how to turn off Joe. Joe, you're on Joe. Okay, yeah, okay, Joe. You don't even know how to turn on FaceTime. She doesn't either. She just keeps flicking at her phone randomly. That's okay. Right. Joe, you look like a pizza pie, right? Oh, wait, sorry. I'm on Yelp. Are you still there, Joe? What is this?

It's ridiculous. It's like two fools. How many blondes does it take to turn off the micro-jose collection? I can't do this anymore. Oh my god, Joe, where did you turn into Dolores? Oh, wait, I'm sorry. I was looking up loyalty into dictionary earlier.

Oh my god, Joe, you turned into me. Oh, I guess I turned the camera around onto myself. I'm not too crazy. I never looked better, Joe. I never I turned the camera around onto myself. I love it. It's crazy. I never look better, Joe. I never look better than when I look like you. So they go to dinner and to Laura.

So they go to do it and to Laura says, like, I think she's there first. She's like, hey, can we get some bread and some buffalo wings? They're in a nice restaurant. She's like, I got some buffalo wings, please. Thank you. She's my hero. She's like, we're first, but I'm not waiting to eat. All right. How about that? And she's like, red, red basket. And she's like, look, you do have something to come with, Margaret, neither one of you would drink us. And Delores is like, I wouldn't waste that calorie on boost. I'll waste it on the food, huh? So the other ladies come and everybody is cheering. And Melissa's like, I wouldn't waste that calorie on booze. I'll waste it on the food, huh?

So the other ladies come and everybody's cheering. And Melissa's like, nobody throw a cake. Yeah. Formalista. But good for her for having something to bring up every episode. So then they're talking about the the the whole retreat and like getting to know yourself and powering.

And Daniel's like, well, now that we're being open and not to make it about me, but I would like to make it about me for a moment, please. So Dolores, I hear you're saying that I'm on drugs and medications. Would you care to comment? Dolores, Dolores, this keeps eating. She's like, man, are you? Are you? Are you?

No, I'm not. Okay. Fine. Melissa's like, well, she's saying it never happened. That, you know, the lorissa saying that she never said anything. So we have one liar at the table and one telling the truth. Period. It's like, okay.

Powers of deduction are just blowing me away. You have to lorissa's like, you would have killed in my division. Okay. Melissa's like, okay, here's what we got. We got one dead body and two people who said they didn't do it. So it looks like one person's lying and the other person's on the truth. Case closed. Melissa's like, it's below the belt to call someone a drug addict. It's like, you've been called a drug addict so many times on blogs that that's why you're mad. So stop projecting, okay. And Margaret's like, look, I know that you mad,

but she's not on pills. I love that everyone's standing up for Danielle. Like, you guys have VBRs. Anybody on this show have a VBR. The Laura doesn't back down. She's like, I don't trust that cause, where should I start? And then we see a montage of everybody just railing on Daniel for years. Well, yeah, Delores like, you know what?

She's somebody who the elevator doesn't reach the top with. I was like, that's funny. It also doesn't totally make sense, but I appreciate it. I know. So you're saying that she's like the elevator that doesn't go to the penthouse like Like now you're like money shaming her and that's not nice. All it means is that maybe she has two different elevator shafts in her. You know, like the one that takes her to take the elevator to floor 23 and then you have to like walk across to get to the next elevator bank. Oh, hey, the, they're the worst. They're the worst. That's all I wanted.

They both. It was a straight, it with this one full elevator shaft. So she goes, she's like, look, I don't like liars. OK, that's it. You're a liar. You're a delusion. And Teresa's like, she's relentless. This is it.

And to Laura says, like, honestly, look, I don't care what I said about you. Because what are you going to do to me? Ha, what are you going to do? Ha. But you know what? Yeah. Oh, me? Ha, what are you gonna do? Ha! But you know what? Yeah. Oh, but you know what?

I see your character down. She goes, yeah, well, you have none. Yeah, she's like, your character is nothing to brag about. But what was interesting was that Danielle was saying that she was confused about what Dolores was telling her and that in that, that alleged conversation, Danielle was like, I was confused about what you were saying. And so, and that's why she told Teresa and so Dolores goes well then you should have asked me what I meant by it if I even said it. I was like uh oh yeah was that was that like a was

that a crack right there. Yeah but it's both of them kind of admitting it because you know she's admitting that she took something out of context and she's admitting that there was something to take out a context I'm not sure it's probably a totally benign thing that Danielle took out a context because I don't think that like you have to be on drugs or crazy But like Danielle is you know, I think she's I think Danielle is good for misinterpreting things pretty easily I think she's really good for that and well Dolores isn't stupid. She's seen this show She knows what she's dealing with with Danielle she was trying to have private time with her to become friends with her and she's not gonna say something that

can and will be used against her and a quarter of rails okay she's not a video oh my god um that was amazing because I was like amazing, because I was not expecting that. No, but I think you're right. I think Dolores is smart enough that she just, she doesn't like Danielle. She thinks Danielle's a snake, and she never would tell Danielle something that that Danielle could potentially

go back to Teresa with. But what I do think is that she probably said something that was benign or a joke or whatever. And Danielle just misinterpreted it and then took it seriously or whatever and Daniel just misinterpreted and then took it seriously or whatever and just ran with it and she's been doing and you know what God bless her because now we have all sorts of fun fights. Yes and then Sige of course is like the mature one now. She's like you know I know that Dolores is upset but this is a time to empower women and she's acting a little too harsh up Ziggy

So Next morning Margaret's like well. Oh, yes, the next morning. They're talking in the rooms again, right? Yeah, well, they win this Margaret say the redeeming thing is that like to reach to reach into Lorec again So that's good right like that's classic march right there and it's like of course they got you know why cuz you can't buy history yes it was somewhere around there somewhere in the mix between the end of this dinner and then the morning so so now Daniel is the next morning everyone's getting ready for this like little outdoor retreat thing and Daniel doesn't think that Sige and Margaret's reconciliation is gonna last because and and basically they all are saying that Siggy fix her relationship with Margaret just so that way she could prove her merits as a relationship person to have this

like come to my retreats and we'll fix everything which I think may have some truth to it. Yeah, of course it's true. I mean it's why Danielle's doing yoga on camera. She's trying to prove. Yeah, of course. It's true. I mean, it's why Daniel's doing yoga on camera. She's trying to prove her merits by putting her ankles behind her head. That's right. You know, like, you got to make yourself look as good at your profession as you can when you got the chance on camera girl. Well, well observed.

So, thank you. So then, another outside and Vicki, the divorce lawyer is going to lead this thing. Okay, what we're going to do here, I learned this from a very important therapeutic practice called Mary to medicine. We're gonna do something called role reversal and what we're gonna do is we're gonna get two people who have an issue and you're gonna play each other in role playing and we're gonna like work out your issues by doing that. So Margaret and Ziggy, why don't you come up first? So, uh, so Margaret and Ziggy are up because no one wants to do it. And basically what they're supposed to be doing is like, like, Ziggy's gonna act like Margaret and Margaret's gonna act like Ziggy are up because no one wants to do it. And based on what they're supposed to be doing is,

like, like, Ziggy's gonna act like Margaret and Margaret's gonna act like Ziggy and they're supposed to get to know, like, it's supposed to help you understand and see how you've been acting. Yeah, it's super Ziggy. She's like, well, I'm gonna choose Margaret because we've come a long way,

but I didn't get a chance to say what I wanna say. You didn't? Yeah. How have you not had a chance? Like you said it on every social media outlet already. You just did it in the women's empowerment speech. Like how many more chances do you need, Ziggy? So nevertheless, she's still, they get up there.

And Margaret, you know, I think everyone was expecting Margaret to say, like, you know, I'm really sad. You were through a cake across the floor and it was really sad, you know, and it really annoyed me. But instead, she just gets up and just starts mocking her. And she's just like, Oh my god, you threw a cake across the floor in Boca Raton with my home. And now I'm gonna cry. Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god, fuck you. You're like, classy trash bubble. Oh my god. Toggy, Toggy, Toggy, Toggy, Toggy. And everyone started laughing their asses off. Like, could stop. Yeah, Tree was like it's so hilarious So hilarious

So hilarious That's so hilarious. It's very hilarious It's like Joshua, where are you? Joshua, Joshua, Joshua, where are you? Now she's just going completely nuts. And Dolores is like is she off of rocker? What, this is an imitation? What are we supposed to do to be empowered here?

And when is the Kalamari gonna arrive? Mm-hmm. And Siggy's just standing there like, both, both, both, both, both. Both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, both, internet like it gets worse. And then we had the preview for coming up this season and I'm just I'm so excited. You know, I happen to have just saw I just watched the Real House of Beverly Hills trailer right before this and there was not even a fraction of the amount of drama in that trailer as there is in the coming up this season on New Jersey. I'm so stoked. Oh no, I know

what that worries me because Real Housewives of Beverly Hills come on, we are canon on y'all! Yeah, I'm a bit worried about that one. We'll have to do a trailer analysis very soon because that shows coming back very soon. Vadi, Vadi, soon. Well, being rapper-at. Well, you guys, thanks so much for listening to this New Jersey recap. We had a fun time. We had a real fun time on this one. We'll be back tomorrow to talk to them below deck, which was also quite hilarious this week.

So stay tuned for that. And then Monday, we're back again for a brand new week. I don't know what a reporting schedule is going to be like next week, but who cares right now? For right now, thanks for listening. Go buy that merchandise on watchcraftings.com. And we will have news about touring. By touring, I mean at least a show, somewhere, somehow. Just stay tuned. Follow us on social media. Talk to you all tomorrow. Bye, everybody! Bye! Bye! Bye! Bye! Bye! Bye! Bye! Where's the stop button? you you you you Hey, Prime members, you can listen to WaterCppens Add Free on Amazon Music, download the Amazon Music app today.

Or you can listen Add Free with Wondry Plus in Apple Podcasts before you go tell us about yourself by completing a short survey at Wondry.com slash survey.