Watch What Crappens - RHONJ: Welcome Back, Scumbag!

Episode Date: October 27, 2017

Melissa gets cake shamed this week on The Real Housewives of New Jersey, and Danielle pulls some old tricks out of a new bag. Enjoy! Also, this week’s bonus episode is all about Stranger Things, Little Shop of Horrors, and fonts. To hear it, become a premium subscriber at http://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.Our Patreon Extras: https://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hey, Prime members, you can listen to watch what crap ends at free on Amazon Music. Download the app today. Get ready for a double load of Queen of Hearts. It's me, Jujubee, and I return to guide sexy singles through some ronchi blind dates. Cameras off. Voice only. Launching during pride. Queen of Hearts takes Miami by storm, with Daeders' Cuppe from Tampa Bayes, Just Chas, and Brittany Brave to name a few. Follow Queen of Hearts on Amazon Music or wherever you get your podcasts. For all of our bonus episodes and premium content, become a member over at patreon.com-watchwhat-crapins. That's patreon.com-watch-what-crapins. You can also find us on social media, on Twitter, we're at what-crapins, on Instagram

and Facebook at Watch What Crapins. We'll see you there. I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, I'm so happy, we go high low, Kristi Daudi, the OG Prem-Saprins, and our super duper premium sponsor, Kelly Grant, the most gorgeous girl in Texas. We love you. Hello, and welcome to Watch What Crappens, the podcast about all that crap. We just love to talk about Aunt Yill Braves.

I'm Ronnie Karen from the bachelor podcast cold rose pricks. Look at that changing of the words today. And there I am with my favorite little man and the whole wide world Ben massacre. The B side blog and the band to Blinda. Hello, Ben. Oh hi, Ronnie, you're my favorite favorite little man in the whole wide world. Also, you are neither of us are little. Aw, we're going up. Yeah.

It's the way you love, guys. It's the way you love the way you love on your podcast. Husbands. Everyone, welcome to Real Housewives of New Jersey day. What a celebration. Hope that everybody is cleaned the cake off the floor. Yeah. The animals that you are.

I tried to try. There's still some frosting down there that I'm going to. Yeah, I'm the animal's that you are. I tried. I tried. There's still some frosting down there that I'm going to lick up because I'm an animal. I'll lick it off the floor. It feels so amazing to not be chilling our show today because you guys sold it out. So thank you for selling out San Francisco. That is next weekend. We are thrilled.

This is our last real housewives of New Jersey recap before that show because that live show will be a real housewives of New Jersey recap. So there you go. Now you know what to watch before you come. Yeah, exactly. And by the way, we pre-recorded our below deck episode for tomorrow. So if you hear us shilling tickets tomorrow, don't be confused. It's just we pre-recorded. Yeah, we got ahead of that monster. Yeah. So shall we just jump right into real housewives of New Jersey being classic mod. Classic mod. Classic mod. Classic mod. Classic mod. That's classic mod. Just to jump right into it. Okay. Guys, just in case you're wondering whose life Melissa Envy's it's her own. I still don't know what the hell that means. Yeah.

I am, V is my own. Really? Well, congratulations. You've got it. Yeah, you've got a very boring, uninteresting life, to end the stupid hooker. You stupid, stupid, and V is hooker. So this week's episode begins, we see Trees at home making pork chops with her dad, and she's drawing them with paper towels, and she's like, is that the trick?

You drive them? I'm like, you have like five cookbook, and you're only now learning that you're supposed to dry your meat before you try to steer it. What is it for us to do with this parsley? What's your tricky chapset? Yes, Teresa, okay. You peel your vegetables, you dry your meat. Do they feel zit, though? What's parsley pose? You know, it goes. I can't wait till someone tells her she's supposed to unbox her plates

before she serves her food. Or preheat another. Why would you turn your oven on if you didn't know food in it? That's what I used to think. So Melania is doing what she does best, kicking the shit out of her sister. Yeah, pretty much. There's nothing. Melania can grow up as much as she wants and she can get her beautiful eyebrows and beautiful eyelashes done as much as she wants to. I will always still love her the same as my little Melania who wears shirts that say I love tacos. I mean that's my kind of kid. I've always

loved her. I always will love her. I can't wait until she steals her first car. I'm gonna be so proud. Yeah, it's gonna it's gonna be an excellent moment. I did not notice that her t-shirts that I love tacos, but that's so that's so amazing. That's so amazing. I love tacos. She's my favorite. The poor Melania, she's going through it because she's, you know, um, she's, she's still missing grandma a lot. And there was like this really sad flashback of her crying in the kitchen, being like, look over there.

And she's not there anymore. And she's like, and Teresa's Teresa's like uh but when you see her it doesn't that make you happy she's like no it makes me scared and I was like oh malania give her a taco well yeah there's a ghost standing there while she's trying to do her homework saying things like Melissa's a dirty or an Italian like of course she's scared leave the poor little girl alone Of course, he's scared. Leave the poor little girl alone. Buta neska. This was very sad guys, because I don't know if you know this,

but, um, Teresa, like, since Joseph's gone, I'm like, essentially, like, a single mom's. And my life's not ever going to be, like, carefree, like. OK. I feel really, really bad for you. Yeah, exactly. And your gigantic mention. That's paid for on the backs of the people you robbed.

Yay, you said drip, drip. Yeah, exactly. See here, see here. Exactly, don't forget you defrauded people. That's why you're a quote unquote single mom at the moment. Yeah, public service announcement. That said, glad you're back from camps. Okay, back on the show.

Love ya. Okay, sticky, Yeah, back on the show. Love ya. Okay, Sikki goes to Dolores house and this is like the suckiest fucking weather I've ever had in my life. Who reigns? Who reigns on that other people? Hello, it's like someone's crying on me. These are my tears that went up to heaven and then came back and fell on my head. For Joshua, my tears screen is so much moisture that it's raining on me.

It's disgusting. So Dolores answers in this huge poncho, which I just, I love to point out ponchos, because this is such a pretty poncho. But she's like, oh hi, how are you? It's like, oh Dolores, I have so much to tell you. Displankin is so comfy. I met it to Dina, the humor came out,

and she apologized. She's making it a mental point to be sensitive. I'm like, can you stop a minute so Dolores can talk about her cabinets? Like Dolores is a person to you, Sige. Dolores is like ready to talk about some sconces she found at pure one. I was going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going to be going is how the hawk steak turns out it's not a Tomahawk. It's actually a steak that looks like a Tomahawk. It's crazy. Did you know that the cowboy steak is actually a cowboy? I felt terrible when I found that. Do you know a port of house? Guess what? It's not a house for a porter. It's actually a steak. So, you know, the G and the flame in your

on is silent. How about that? How about that? It's a G. You don't even say that's a whole letter. So after that brilliant diner scene last seat last time last week. I mean Sikki is now kind of comfortable because she got to sob with you know her fellow Joan She got to laugh with her fellow Joan so she's okay now, but Dolores is like, you know what? As far as Margaret goes I don't trust her. Okay, I don't trust her. And she's like, well, that's good, because in that moment, I have to say, she was being nice to me, but she gave you a dig.

She said you're a yes person. And you know what? She said Theresa Melissa said it too. I don't know why she gave you a dig. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha was like, well, see, yeah. I mean, like, why would I be an ask, Kister? I mean, like, you know, Theresa thinks I'm an ask, Kister. I'm being like the most loyal friend there is. I'm not an ask, Kister.

Yeah, I don't even know where this yes girl comes from. The only person I say yes to is mass and Frank and Frank. And to be honest, I don't even say yes to them that often. It's more like, yes, I get it, but no. No, no, Frank, you can't do that. No, Frank, you can't eat your steak like that. No, Frank, you have to break up with the girlfriend. No, Frank, I'm not going to do the dishes. No, Maz, I'm not coming into work. So I do say yes, but mainly I say no. So I'm watching you like a TV right now. I was like getting into my like Dolores mode.

I know I love that. Well you know I got some coffee today and I went down to store. They have milk on sale. Yeah the milk's on sale. It's the skin milk. But you know what I was thinking about getting some 1% milk. I don't know if I like the 1% it's like okay Dolores. We get it Dolores.

But now Dolores has actual things to talk about besides countertops and cabinets. And she's like, I've risked my own credibility to vouch for Teresa's behavior a million times, a million times. It's like, that's the idiot father who keeps co-signing leases. You know what I mean? And then they're like, why am I broke?

Because you keep co-signing the lease of your like drug addict auto theft, you know, son. That's why. Yeah. Let me tell you something. Every single time I go into the hallmok store and I buy a massive, a new figurine, I always have to tell them Teresa's a great girl. She's a great girl.

Just like Frankie, Frankie's a great guy. You know what, Teresa's a great girl. Frank, he's okay. You know what though? But he thinks he runs his house. He hasn't been in 18 years. So Frankie's a little weird bite. He called him embarrassed. He got a pile just, okay, you know what though, but he thinks he runs this house. He hasn't been in 18 years So Frank is a little weird by it called him embarrassed me. He got a pile just okay Dolores got it

So she threw the little poise Lynn Maxine the shoebox lady across the store She was celebrating she's back from camps You know what I love. I love those tender memories figurines. They're wonderful Anyway, so It's like you know what we'll do. We'll have a party Well, he had to reach out because once a year my friend Jody sells affordable jewelry and Pam and her mother So, Ziggy is like, I know what we'll do, we'll have a party. We'll hear Teresa out, because once he hear my friend, Jody sells affordable jewelry,

and Pam and her mother sell affordable handbags. I wanna support them, I wanna support affordability, I wanna support women, I wanna support everyone. So if you're gonna come, just don't be like, Braaaah! Okay, Ziggy, you're the one who's screamed and yelled at every event that's happened so far this year. Yeah, exactly. And of course, she has a friend named Jody and a friend named Pam,

and Pam has a mom who's coming too. Like, yes. Okay, Bernice is coming also. She's going to be selling her new line of bedazzled coasters. They're wonderful. So Bernice and Jody can get together with Pam. I think also Joanne's coming also. Joanne, she's selling her own wine glasses. They change color when you hold them. Great. I mean, who doesn't need a tissue box with glitter and jewels? Thank God for a Pam. And the lures is like, well, look, I'm no follow up,

but I'll do exactly what you say. Just say when and where. So I can't wait to see Jody's handbags. So when I'm way out when I way out to Premiere, when I want to go to watch what happens live, if Andy Cohen ever invites me and he says, where'd you get that handbag? I'll say it's from Jody from Jersey has Dolores never been on. I'm sure she has been. Oh, yeah, I would hope.

So my God, what if Andy just had something against Dolores? He was like, no, I don't know. If I have to hear about one God damn kitchen remodel. He does play favorites, so who knows. But I think that Dolores has got, she's got to have been on by now. Yeah. Well, hopefully, hopefully she was there going, oh, Andy, so bad. Because you know that's what she'd say on every single day.

You know, Andy, I'm not going to answer that right now. Okay, you know what I'm not going to answer that. All right, you're just scumbag. You scumbag. Welcome back, scumbag. Okay, I had it myself. So now we go over to the Gorgah House where Joe is busy smacking Melissa's ass and then in turn, Melissa smacking Joe's ass, which is pretty much where it goes if this household, you know,

minus like a waffle flying through the air. And I guess you show up. It's Matt with Joseph and Joe. It's Mack with Joseph and Joe. It's Mack with Joseph and Joseph. Oh God. And I love that Melissa's getting all, you know, yes, all women or whatever. She's like, how would you like it if I smacked your ass, Joe?

He's like, yeah, get a bona. Yeah, they have an orgasm. Yeah. She's like, yeah, you like that? Yeah, you like that. Yeah, you like that? It's like, glad we're all learning. Glad we you like that. Yeah, you like that. It's like, glad we're all learning. Mm-hmm. Glad we're all learning.

Yeah, so March and Chau come over. And she's like, we brought alcohol even though I don't drink classic match. Also, something else is in the back, which I'm not going to tell you what it is. You just have to guess. You just have to guess, okay, I'll tell you, it's a Duster. You know what?

Not like, not like a Lisa Rina Duster. It's a Magra Joe's. It's one of the Macbeth collection. And honestly, it's a Duster Buster. Honestly, we're selling D a Lisa Rina Desta. It's a Magra Joe's. It's one to make Beth a collection And honestly, it's a Dess Buster. Honestly, we're selling Dess Buster's now, but it has a little fur trim on it I think it's great. It's wonderful. I think you love it's classic match B Classic match. Oh no, the Dess Buster sucked itself up. Okay. All right. Well, it doesn't just rim anymore. No big deal. So it works. So it works so

Just like hey, yeah, I want you know want more of a detailed story on how you met. Okay, here's how I imagine it goes. Bram bram was wearing a bra. You know, I can't always wear a bra like sometimes Joe wants me to be mad. I get away a bra And I was like I can't wear bra. It's like classic man. Not to wear a bra I'm just like let the two of these girls just flying left and right You know just bouncing around like one of those things like you put on a desk But a marble goes from the left to the right and they hit each other on the strings It's like those are my boobs right now. Okay. That's what I'm feeling. I walk down

He's staring at my boobs. I'm like, you know what? Why don't you go stare at Jodie because her oven works. Okay. Why don't you go up the street? Hit up some macaroni and cheese. Come back to me. Then we can talk. Joe saw me for the first time. He said, well, big tail. So so called handlebars. Yeah, you know, we smelled like baloney, but then I just wanted him to get inside me, but then I took him forever. Finally, I was like, come on, pull the trigger. Get in here already. You know, what's the big deal with baloney anyway? Like everyone says baloney is bad. I guess what? It's like five different meets who doesn't want more meat. You know what's the big deal with Bologna anyway like everyone says Bologna is bad I guess what it's like five different meets who doesn't want mommy You know I'm saying like why don't we get like more the merrier get more than what all the meats inside a joke

That's what I say we go get a motel room. No, we couldn't do it in the couch You know the couch is brand new. It's got the plastic on it my senior would walk in on it be very difficult You know I told Joe go into motel motel six. Guess? You should call the motel 69 for what he did to me, Joe. You see what I did, classic match. And then Joe Gorgo, of course, asked the most important question. Was it in the kitchen? And she's like, God, no, that wasn't even finished yet. We had to go to a hotel.

It took like 10 years for him to finish that kitchen. So the oven doesn't work. Thank God for, thank God for. Fomona down to three. What an angel, bubble up. What was her name? You think I think your name is Jody also. No, actually, your name is Margot.

Let me tell you something. You think I'm going to have sex in a room that doesn't have running water. Okay, you never can happen. All right. I got to wash my hands after I do this one. Okay. I told them, look, I'll have sex with you in here. The minute you get confetti on the floor, right?

Right. Put some confetti down, put some myler up. Then we can have some sex. Okay. That's what I'm saying right now, Joe. But you know what, though? Like, you know, I up, then we can have some sex. Okay, that's what I'm saying right now, Joe. But you know what though, like, you know, I don't want to make Joe cry. Okay, that's not what I'm here to do. All right, I'm like, at the end of the day, I'm a

very compassionate person. And like, that's not what the Macbeth collection is about, making people cry. So we go to Motel Macbeth, okay, classic match. Any man who dates someone or marry somebody who has a collection called the Macbeth collection needs to watch the fuck out. I was at Tiago yesterday and a guy I was reading McBeth and I like almost a picture to be like, McBeth collection and I was like, okay, I got to get a hold of myself, okay. My world, my life cannot be overrun by housewives. If I see McBeth, my first instinct should not be,

oh my god, real househouse New Jersey, it should be like, oh, what a fine-trix period in play. I do not trust anybody in a coffee shop reading Macbeth. Come on. Give me a break. Give me a fuck. Maybe he was like, maybe he was getting ready for acting class. No, give me a break. Also, speaking of acting class, I live right by an acting studio and every time I'm walking Bueller at night, they're all standing on the street, you know, running their scenes with each other,

talking to each other. Is that the one on fountain? Yes. Oh my god. might they're all standing on the street, you know, running their scenes with each other, talking to each other? Is that the one on fountain? Yes. Oh my God. I was people. Oh my God. There's something about that acting studio. Like I don't see any other acting studio across this city. It's something with that acting studio. Maybe they don't have enough room, but they're always on the sidewalk.

At 7 p.m. Always like talking to themselves, or starting their scenes. I mean, I just drive by. I see them. I'm like classic actors. Classic as an older lady on the corner of the building and I guess her scene partner was like fuck this I'm practicing and so she had to like run her lines by herself but I'm walking down fountain and I'm just looking at this crazy old lady screaming at the sky like she's really going for it you know

because when you're an acting class it's really important that you scare the people on the streets to know that you've got something, you know, it was all worth the move. And I thought, this is really getting to be like the meth head homeless people screaming get the sky near that target on LaBrea. Like it's really harder to tell who's in acting class and who's just a homeless screaming like, yeah, there's a fine line between bum and actor. There really is. And I'm not sure if that saying that things are going well for our country, or if they're just worse, like our homeless people getting dressed better, our actors just

dressing worse. I don't know. But I think it's for any of those damn plays. I'll tell you that. There, the truth is, there's, there's just not a lot of difference between method and methadone these days, right? The methadone clinic. Oh, so anyway, anyway, so now they go about acting Melissa and Joe go into play pool with their couples on the couple state. A totally spontaneous activity, you know, except for the fact that there was a giant poster of Melissa's book in the background love Italian salt. Did you notice that? No, I did not.

Well, good for you. That's what muster is to look at in this house. I'm not a good guy. I'm not a good guy. I'm not a good guy. I'm not a good guy. I'm not a good guy. I'm not a good guy. I'm not a good guy. I'm not a good guy. I'm not a good guy. I'm not a good guy.

I'm not a good guy. I'm not a good guy. I'm not a good guy. I'm not a good guy. I'm not a good guy. I'm not a good guy. I'm not a good guy. I'm not a good guy.

I'm not a good guy. I'm not a good guy. I'm not a good guy. I'm not a good guy. I'm not a good guy. I'm not a good guy. I'm not a good guy. I'm not a good guy. I'm not a good guy. I'm not a good guy. like here in LA people love painting those wings on their walls so people take Instagram photos and they think they're so original Steve Bette-Rose-Yeah, but the roots are probably really found like the first angel and just like ripped off his wings so it's like it's a dilemma

they killed it then yeah so they're playing pool and they're like yeah pool I just went to pool so glad we came over okay so now when we tell you I went out with Ziggy you know she's suffering she'sgy, you know, she's suffering. She's suffering because she knows she was crying and I felt bad. She's suffering. But we left happy and the diner, it was empty when we left, you know, which is a good sign. So classic wise, you know, classic. Classic wise. Leave empty.

You know what? She cried five times and it was just like, it was like enough already, but you know, she had cheese fries. She gave me to cheese fry gave us some arm like everything was fine I thought we did agree that I'm more of a Joan than she is okay. You know what that's true Guess what I'm better friends with Joan than she is she admitted it everything's good The only thing she's gotten common with with Joan rivers is the rivers part because it's rivers of tears all day long Yeah talk about Sagi flicker more like Sagi River, right? Sagi Bottom Boys, right? I told her, I'll be Joan, you'll be River. Okay. So she took that you took it and made it self-jone ocean. You know what I'm saying?

Like she honestly cried me an ocean. Okay, that's what that's what goes on. Sagi Flicka, Sagi. Has to have some. First world problems. You know, she thinks it's a hormones, but she's getting pellets in her butt. She told me which of course leads the Joe's to be like, what? Hell it's what? And Joe number two is like, that's crazy. You better never do nothing like that to yourself, Margie. And Joe's like, you women, huh? Why are you women got to go true men and pies? Huh? What is that stupid women? What the hell? What is that? What is that stupid women? What the hell? What is that? Yeah, they're like they're basically like sitcom characters at this point, but like a crappy sitcom that no one ever watched He's basically like one of those people when when you see people who are going through trauma

On TV. They're like yes, he shot at the police, but it's because he was going through trauma with those wide confused eyes That's Joe at all times. I just, I would never be your ad Joe on a block of knives. So importantly, NamoLa says, she's pissed. She's like, you know, I want an apology. She apologized to you, but where's my apology? It was my birthday. Who's the real victim here? I'm like, we are actually, we're the victim

because we had to watch this, although we actually really loved this. So we're not the victim. And so when you need pellets, I'm gonna shoot myself. Okay. Okay. Keep your promises, sir.

Leva, yeah, you're the one who's gonna need plugs, so. So, see you next time. That we got. Remember when massage, when you was okay. Yeah, like two weeks ago. And then Harvey Weinstein happened, and now it's like, oh.

So, just getting, let's reshoot the season. He's asked, I'll just be exposed. Let's reshoot the season. Everyone's coming out. You know, there actually is a Bravo link to all this like post Weinstein sexual harassment stuff that's coming out, which is that John Besh

had to step down from his restaurant empire. John Besh is a frequent guest on top chef. He also was on Iron Chef America, but John Besh had to step down from his restaurant group. So they're top chef, Ty and to Harvey Weinstein's scandal. Pigg. Yeah. Anyway, we then go over to Siggy's house. We just Oh Kisses kiss his way of my dog

I got us take out for some reason I love that she like picked up the paper bag to Because she got take out and like the bag broke at the bottom. Did you see that? This bag is an animal Who does that? Who what's that bag? And then put it in a plastic bag in case the wet bag breaks and the bra, bag breaks as expected.

She's like, how's that? Are you sleeping here? Her house? Oh, her house? Why aren't you sleeping here? Josh, you're one. He's like, sure. Mom, we're not ready for three Sims.

You fucking creep. Also, because she has fucking door on the hinges in her bedroom Okay, it wasn't taking us so his mom can creep by that's right because you know that if you brought Deb over and they're having sex you like Joshua I just want to ask do you need a beverage while you're having sexual relations with Deborah Deborah Just want you to know your cookie isn't as good as my cookie Joshua cookie test Joshua he's a glass of milk now compare cookies that's all I wanted

my wanted was an opportunity to show where my my cool mom that is not that is not how okay you're already comparing your. I think he's making the wise choice. I didn't know, because I obviously didn't have a girlfriend or a boyfriend in high school. But was that like a thing that people would stay over at each other's house as like I do when they're adults? I didn't think that was like, oh, I didn't think that. Yeah, if you want your alarm clock to go off at 4 in the morning

and sound like you stupid slut or sitting bitch, which would be my mom yelling at us as we got caught. Hell no, you don't sleep at someone's house, but I am old, you know, now it's like, okay, have your have your boyfriend come sleep over so I can check him out, make sure he's wearing condoms and, you know, do a p-test. Yeah, exactly. Now it's actually the responsible thing to do to have them in your own house, you know, it is sort of.

So now, um, yes, and now she's like grilling Josh Joshua. Joshua, are you, so are you going to go to college with Deb? Is she coming with you? Are you guys going to get married in college freshman year marriage? Are you going to forget about me? Are you going to forget about me in college? Is your first, are you going to take forget about your mother one on one? Is that way are you going to take, forget about your mother 101. Is that way, are you gonna major and forget it,

get about your mother? The wonder, who gave birth to you? Who's cookie? It's better than Dems Cookie. Chips a Hoi, more like chips a Hoi. That's who she is. Chips a Hoi. Josh is like, nope.

Is he to that difficult to talk to your mom? Give me more than one sentence, more than one word. You know why I'm, you, he's like, why are you so mad? She's like, you know why I'm upset. Every little thing I do one noise. You I can't give anymore. Joshua. Can't give anymore.

Every time I drive over a trash can lid, I think about you and I wonder, is he thinking about me too? She used a whole roll of paper crowds. Tows sobbing because Josh is only giving her one word answer. Girl, you need to get you some Vibas, okay? There's no paper, but they're light cloth. Should make a hilarious lawyer cross examining witness.

Will you will you will you at Dacastino's at 10 p.m. The night of the crime? No Will you at Best Buy? No, will you at Costco? No, please just give me something your honor I just beg you to ask the witness to give me something I can't give anymore. I can't give anymore. I can't give any more to this witness You know what I witness? I witness someone who doesn't love his lawyer who's on the other side. Let me tell you something. When this trial is over, will you remember me witness? Because I have guilty. I can't remember. Will you remember how clean I got this like Zanya days? I just love watching her sob over a lasagna dish that she's washing is. I would like to approach the bench

So I could give a hug and a kiss to the witness He's like no Irana I would suggest Refusing to let this witness lock his door at night. So his mother can come in Look, it's a prison. Okay. I just want to be the cool lawyer here. That's all Come in. Look, it's a prison. Okay. I just want to be the cool lawyer here. That's all. That's all I wanted. Are you taking them to prison with you? Objection in the criminal justice system.

What is his feet in the criminal justice system? There are the hold on have to look at it because now I have a bomb in the criminal justice system let's see do you swear to tell the truth the whole truth and nothing but the truth so help me God in the criminal justice, the people are represented by two separate yet equally important groups that come to investigate crimes and the lawyers who just want more. Just a little more. Jump. Joshua, if you don't answer my questions, I'm going to hold you in contempt of your mother. My name's not even Joshua and not my mother.

In the criminal justice system, Sige based offenses are considered especially heinous. Oh Lord, how sissy. So let's go back to tree's house in the kitchen. So she's like, yeah, oh my goodness, what are you gonna do right now? I have to study a first spouting test. Okay, I love you. Celebrity beef, you never know if you're just gonna end up on TMZ or trending on Twitter or in court. I'm Matt Bellasife. And I'm Sydney Battle, and we're the host of Wonder E's new podcast, Disantel. Each episode explores a different iconic celebrity feud, from the build-up, why it happened, and the repercussions. What deserves session with these feuds say about us?

We're starting off with a pretty messy love triangle between Selena Gomez and Justin and Haley Bieber, a seemingly innocent TikTok of Selena talking about her laminated eyebrows. It snowballed into a full-blown alleged feud. But it doesn't seem like fans are letting up anytime soon. Despite both Selena and the Bieber's making public statements denying any bad blood. How much of this is teen jealousy and lovers quarreling, and how much of it is a carefully crafted narrative designed to sell albums? Follow this and tell wherever you get your podcasts.

You can listen ad-free on the Amazon Music or Wondering Out. I'm not here. It's a fire. It's a fire. It's a fire. It's a fire, the gara. Oh, it's that thing in the chair. And she's like, okay, sphere. And she's like, sph, e, i, e. And she's like, okay, good. What's that?

What is that? Is that that's like when you have a bad headache and they say you got a, the, the sphere headache, huh? That's what the Indians use to shoot the other Indians with, huh? So, huh? That's like where you go and gets your makeups in Sephora, huh? So Mel comes, Melissa comes by with things that are

not sugar cookies. Oh she's like it looks delicious. They're trying to talk and I drink it. I drink it's like mommy done way dog. It's like yeah mommy look it's upside down tree. Yeah. Melissa's like, why are you talking to your children? No. Yeah. Yeah, Melissa's like, she just gives them everything. Like, she's just too much of a pusher for them. You're noticing this just now.

Just now? Yeah, and who are you talking to? Like, who are you talking about? You treat your husband like that. How about you get your husband to not buy restaurants without your permission, and then you can criticize how other people should be running their families. Madam!

Yeah, how about your husband stops throwing waffles around like their frisbee's or aerobies, because I remember aerobies. And then you can talk. How about your daughter was sassing people last week on the show, so maybe you should sass your daughter. How about that? How about that?

Yeah. How about you talk your son into being less of a misogynist at three years old or whatever the hell he is? You're raising a nightmare, Melissa. Although her son, remember it was last season. The son likes to they were all having like a big pal with dinner and he's so he's like, I just want to say one thing. I love everyone at this table. And we're all like, whoa. Yeah, he's like, I just want to say one thing. I love everyone at this table.

And we're all like, whoa. Yeah, he's so cute. I'm not really guessing her kids. I just like to throw a spear from the list. I like to throw so fears at Melissa. So fears. Also, Teresa said spheres correctly. I was just shocked that she said it correctly. I had to rewind it because I was like, did she just say spheres correctly, which really goes to show you where we're at on this show? Like I watched Planet of the Eight Flasemite, the war of the Planet of the Eightes, and I was like these people are, like these, these apes.

But you're talking about season three of this show, right? The apes in this movie are more well mannered than this cast. I just thought, for some reason I thought it was funny that Adriana had to learn how to spell sphere of all the words. I don't know why. I can even think of the Michael Criteon book, which is good because that book is really about people

manifesting their deepest fears and that's kind of what this show is about. Ah, spelling. Hey, there's a big squid in our living room. So Melissa's like, she always gives into her kids. She's a Mr. Softie. She's like soft sir with sprinkles and whipped cream, like everything on there. Just someone make Melissa stop talking, please.

I was getting between the cupcakes and the soft serve references. I was getting so hungry. It's like, no wonder why when it was over, I like got some chocolate milk at Ralph's. I don't know what came over me. I was like, I feel like having chocolate no wonder why when it was over, I got some chocolate milk at Ralph's. I don't know what came over me. I was like, I feel like having chocolate milk tonight. I got to think of quick. I was like, I haven't bought quick in like 15 years.

And you know what? It wasn't as good as I remembered it. I blame Melissa. Now I can track that urge to Melissa in this scene. It's just odd to compare to Risa to her with Sunday. It's like, okay, I'd like some vanilla ice cream with denied, denied, denied, denied. Mahamputat, please.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. So she's more like, I think maybe pushover would probably be a better reference for Melissa. Anyway, the point is this, Melissa, Melissa winds up getting mad in the scene because she finds out that Teresa knew about this restaurant before her. So she's like, you know, she's like, huh, I can't believe Tree knew about it before me.

I'm like, well, yeah, I can because it's your husband and this is just the way it goes. Welcome to the rest of your life. Yeah, you mentioned the bathroom. That's a private nudie time. So Audrey is like eating her cupcake and they are already we can see this this splinter start with this relationship

because Melissa's like where's the time like everyone who owns a restaurant is working Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday I'm like also Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday Melissa. What restaurant she's going to do? And she's like yeah, well he wants me to do it too. And I was like, yeah, it sounds great.

So Melissa's starting to do it. Well, I'm sure it'll do just as well. I'm sure it'll do just as well as Heather DeBros' restaurant. From five years ago, that never happened. Oh my God. Favorite comment section of the Orange County register ever when she talked about her future Restraught and everyone's like, shut up, you stupid bitch.

You say Orange County doesn't know any good restaurants have there you. So good. So now we go to our classic match at the home office and she's walking into the the Margaret Joseph's collection, the Macbeth collection office. She's like, what's going on, little Posse? Hey, there you are. Hey, little British woman with the Josie Act and how are you doing? Hey, Mom, hi, my name's Tonya, what's going on?

What's going on? What's going on? We have a lot of very busy today. What's going on? What's going on? Yeah, I need some reports. I need some reports on the elephant sex change purses. And also, mom's sex life, senior.

What you got to say for yourself.'t River senior you're up to bat And she's oh my god. Oh My god, and I was like what what An old friend of mine Bob is coming its town and I'm gonna go out dinner with him Okay, my senior over here ADD with the conversation my right it's classic Joan right there That's a Joan Rivers right there. You know as one of the favorite people of a ball time mom, all time. Seriously, you're gonna go to dinner with him at the work day? Like what is that? She's like, you had him over here during the work day for sex, I mean, who does that, my? And she's like,

I went to the living room. Seriously, ADD of sex, you know, she doesn't even know which one's half of her sex anymore. Like, what do I tell, don't do it in the kitchen, she doesn't even know which ones have her sex anymore. Like, what do I tell her? Don't do it in the kitchen, don't do it in the living room. Like, get a motel room, just like you do on it. That's what you gotta do, Ma. Well, yeah, me and my Ma were only 20 years apart, so we raised each other, you know. Like, what are you gonna do, dirty picks, huh?

Like, no dirty picks, Ma, okay. We're gonna have to have a brand called Dirty Grandma and she's like it's called sexy grandma Yeah, my mom taught me to rely on myself and to pick out lipstick So you know what you know what I always say I was raised by wolves, you know That's what I that's why we have for all the time because I feel like I'm a wolf on my calf wolf I'm like wolf wall street except I'm not a wall street I'm just in like here in like piramus, New Jersey. That's what I am wolf a piramus Okay, and you know what I love it. I love it. I love I travel in packs and my packs I mean a pack of one you know what the only only thing you only pack I have is a pack of cigarettes

I don't even smoke it's just crazy. Just like a prop. It's just prop comedy. That's what I do. It's very Magnetiusus Classic match. Classic match. Classic match. Okay, well some sex advice for you is to find someone good at sex. Okay Sex is important. I'm not afraid a no and everyone's like whoa mom Classic match senior Not much so the phone rings it's like Oh everybody that's that's the crying ladies rinka hello, Sige it's classic mods here the crying ladies ringa hello siggy it's classic mods here

she's like hello mosh how are you? i wanted to say i hope you're having a wonderful day you're a beautiful person i hope you can come by some purses you sound a little shaky are your ovens warming your house or is it extra cold in there still i'm still f finding up those cheese fries. And Marge is like, oh I would love to but we're going to be in Vegas into shoe shell.

I've got shoes as well. They're made out of elephant nuts. And so he's like, get fun honey. Well. Yeah we're going to something called Shooter Selae. And basically it's a bunch of shoes that get anti-reps and can Torot themselves to be a very hilarious show. I can't wait to see it. I'm very excited for it. It's called shoes to salay. Oh We just we go on a diving board and we throw the shoes off

It's called it's shoot me bitch and basically a shoe comes down sings Britney Spears song. It's hilarious It's a wonderful. It's it like, shoot me baby one more time. Great song, great song. It's basically a shoot owed to Britney Spears, like oops, I shoot it again. Celine Shuang, basically, basically some sparkly shoes come out and cry very dramatically.

We can see, we can see a's great. A classic Vegas act. Shunuten. She just comes out dancing. Strong. No one really knows why Shunuten is famous, but you just is. I'm just going to buy tickets to it anyway. We love it.

So next up lunch with Dan Danielle Teresa and Melissa. So Melissa or Teresa gets there. I'll wait. Yeah. I was was gonna say I'm surprised you didn't mention the waiter. I thought you were going to just like, how about the waiter? Why? What did he do? Well, because I know you love mentioning the waiter. Like, you know, you you you you hate how Bravo always shows the waiters. Well, I hate when they're like auditioning for something like someone's gonna discover them as a wider audience.

Because this guy was like, he's clear. He was like a joke-pass you guys. He's like, hello, may I take your water? I don't know, Ryan's got a field day with this guy. Like after the waiter in Boca that was like, hey, honey, love you, love you. I think after that, it's pretty hard to top that waiter. I mean, not literally, I'm sure everybody tops that way there, but you know what I mean

So Melissa and Danielle now I don't know if everybody in the world forgot about the history between Melissa and Danielle Which we'll get to a little bit later, but never let them alone at a table to reset like if you're gonna be on time for any lunch It should be this one with these two But she's like not having wine. I got headaches. And then you all say, all what did the brand Z know? I love a good below deck bed reference. Yes. I just had to mention brand Z know because you know, oh yeah, you know, you know, I think, uh think I love a good happy and I think she's moving here to LA because I saw on Twitter the other day, she's like, yeah, I'm going to stay

with my friend in Brentwood and I'm looking for a place to live out here. And right now I'm getting lunch at my favorite place Whole Foods Market. I was tempted to be like, I'm going to come say hi to you. We should we keep trying to go out with Captain Sandy, but we're, we've been out of town both times. She's been here. Well, you know who else was in town like two days ago. Oh, tree. She was, she was signing autographs at Barnes Noble. And I was like, I wanted to go and take a picture, but there was no in hell. I'm putting money to buy that book and stand in line

just to get a photo up. So I'm like, no, sorry. Yeah, Captain Sandy, I love legit. Theresa, no. I don't know. I would do it for the gram, but I'm not gonna spend money for the gram. I mean, I would do it just to watch her sign.

Love, Svia, my. Like, I'll spend money on Luan. Like, if Luan's coming to town, I'll buy that book. I'll get in like on Luan. Like if Luan's come into town, I'll buy a book. I'll get in like Luan, because you know, like Luan's like, I think my number one these days. And I don't know if you notice people magazine.

She has. She has like, there's something in people magazine this week where it's like, come take a tour of my Sagarber house. Get my little corner of heaven. Like, okay, Luan. Someone wrote us. I'm sorry, I forgot his Instagram name, but he's like, hasn't she shown off that SAGAHR warehouse 10 times already? Like literally 90,000 times. Oh, but I got a new Mr. Coffee, the only

man in my life. By the way, I have to say while we're thanking people for stuff that they say on the internet, this is so random that I'm doing this in the middle of a real housewives of New Jersey episode. But I have to say, those, um, somebody made us coasters and brought them to Chicago. These girls brought us made us amazing coasters. I mean, it's all original artwork. Some of them are of us as the, as the housewives. I mean, they're really, really good. And we said thank you after the Chicago show, but I didn't have the card, so I didn't know who they were. So they're from Jackie and Trisha, your cut fitnesses of Chicago. Southside. So,

whoa, I found this card finally cleaning my house and getting organized. And these coasters are fucking amazing. Thank you so much. We love you so much. Thanks for those thoughtful gifts. Yeah. So take your time. And it was Brandon Heath, who by the way gets credit for being like, didn't have a new end show off that Sag Harbor House 400 times. Oh, and to those people who are new, just listening to this podcast and saying, are they ever going to finish this recap? And what the fuck are they talking about right now? Welcome to Watch What Happens. Yeah, welcome, welcome.

Tangents are what we live off of. Anything else to be thankful, anybody? Because I've been drinking some homemade cold brew today. And you know, that's the strong, I want to, I need a refill to be honest. I started pre brewing like the night before. I pre-brew a pot of my cafe postello, which is my personal favorite. Espresso brewed, you know, gas acid

that I drink every morning, and started refrigerating it, so in the morning I can drink way more, wake, wake, wake quickly. So it's doing great for my heart. Guys, that is great. I'm moving next week week and I'm no longer going to be within like quick walking distance of Starbucks. It'll be like a

little it's like I'm I basically I'm gonna have to really rely on my homemade cold brew for those lat those times when I only have 10 minutes before the show begins to get my Starbucks. So I'm gonna I'm gonna be really cold brewing it up. Are you okay over there? I'm so sorry. I'm trying to hear any stories of me moving. Yeah, I've decided to start vaping again instead of smoking and it hurts. Okay, everybody lunch. So basically this lunch, they Danielle starts off because she's like anybody heard from Sikier Dolores and she's like nah and she goes well here's the thing I never want to be the person saying something stod now drama but Dolores said

something compromising and if she doesn't come clean I'm gonna tell Theresa myself which known as that of course the thing that Dolores said that was compromising was totally in private. And it was when she was going to hire Danielle's latest fiance to do some work for her. Danielle really low. But some what do you mean by that? What was the fiance thing? I don't know about that. Because she says at one point, she was over because she she's gonna get some business advice from my fiance about whatever I guess she says that later

So she takes like a private thing and then comes up with something that Dolores has supposedly said Without cameras around and then brings it here. It's and y'all really you know I can't I can't play him a girl for trying to pay the rent, but. Well, you know, I'd rather have this come up than have to deal with like another five episodes of Teresa crying because she's home alone. So meanwhile, Danielle says this, and Melissa's still complaining she didn't get an apology.

You know, she's like, well, I don't know about you guys. I still haven't gotten an apology. Wait, she apologized to you Teresa. She apologized to you you but not me like where huh like can I even get some sloppy seconds around here it's like no because you don't deserve an apology why do you have to be apologized to yeah she's like sloppy thirds even yeah you don't deserve one so Teresa's like well I'm gonna go to Puerto Rico with the kids because we

haven't been away in years because because Melissa's like, yeah, because you were away. The game is. Yeah, the camp says in a way is a way is a way is a camp says so she's like, we want to go zip line in. Melania wants to go do that zip line and she's like, don't let her. She's working you, okay. You're too nice to them because they don't want you

to be mad. Put your foot down. Fuck off Melissa Who and who cares if a kid wants to go zip lining? Is that like some horrible thing? I mean, I feel like fuck off Melissa, but I also feel like what she said wasn't like that bad She wasn't saying you're a bad parenty guy that she she's just saying she's like you know like you're afraid to be nice It's okay to put your foot down. I I think it's you know I understand when

people don't want to be get parenting advice from strangers and or podcast hosts, but I feel like when it's your sister, like sister-in-law sister, you're old. It's allowed to say something like that. It was pretty benign. It wasn't very juggie. It wasn't said in a mean angry way or accusatory. So I think Teresa has to actually. I think it's because it's the second scene in a row that she's getting on her about parenting things. Well, she's like becoming a pattern at this point. Melissa didn't say anything to Teresa.

The other scene she just mentioned to us. Oh, that's true. Yeah, she said something like you're letting your kid do yoga now or she's going to something now. I don't know. But yeah, I know parents are touching though. Yeah, well, I don't know. But yeah, I'm sure it's her. I know parents are touching though. Yeah, well, I don't blame it. I mean, I don't blame her.

And that's really bad if you're getting me to pick Teresa. See, what I like is when I was, when I was at my boyfriend's family reunion, like what's great is that that's the sort of family where like any adult is allowed to discipline any child. So even if it's not your child, you know, you're allowed to be like, Hey, don't do that. Like you're allowed to discipline, which is a little different, I guess, in this, but I think that's I think it's good when when

Parents just like if someone says you got to control your kid, like that should be like allowed. That should be okay Like don't take it personally. It just means like hey, this is a note for you. This is a note Here's a note. Well one thing Teresa does not take our notes especially from Melissa. So that's basically that. Teresa's like that is Volsey of hers. I would never tell anyone how to be with a kid like she has my brother to cook here and I'm doing this essentially on my own spheres. So give me a break. Give me a break. I show he is trying to make it to the tops. OK? Yeah, whatever. Yeah.

So then we go over to the new restaurant. It's a whole new scene. And Joe is there. And Trey comes by and like, well, it's Melissa. She's late, huh? So Teresa, who's 45 minutes late herself? Yeah, she's already 45 minutes late. And then Joe's like, you're late.

She's, yeah, well, Melissa's not here. Well, she's late also. All right. So then Melissa shows up and they're like, Hey, you're late. You know, why is he so late since stuff? You know, I mean, it's time to my, in my schedules of doing nothings to come over here to until be 45 minute late. Why you 55 minutes late? Yeah, because Teresa was slightly less late. And Melissa's like, like, look, I got a business. I got kids. She's like, yeah, I got a business in kids too. I'm New York time bestseller second.

So, yeah. He's like, why you guys, we got an employees. It's a meat, okay? One thing I know about business is you got to make some money, all right? That means you've got to be here. These jokers. Well, is anybody going to be buying the fact that any of them are going to work at this restaurant

or actually one? Exactly. I know. This is, I mean, do we not remember Joe's, the other Joe Judices pizza rhea? Like, we never saw that. We saw that for like three episodes, one season, never saw that one again.

This is not going to be going very far. And then Joe's like, I'm so pissed, she got the I-Bassy to talk about my kids, huh? And Joe's as, you know, you'd be in the kitchen. Yeah, I'd be in the kitchen. And then Melissa's like, well, I'm not gonna go in the kitchen. I told Joe, I don't wanna cook. Like, okay, what do you want?

I wanna be there. I'll be the hostess, but that's it. Like, you're not gonna be a waitress. She's like, no, I'm not gonna be a waitress. And I'm like, you know what? I think she's, I think she's entitled to say, I'm just gonna be the hostess because you know what? This wasn't her idea and she didn't have any impodana and she just got foisted and the scut, wrestling up, foisted on her. So she says, okay, I'll help out, but I'm only be the hostess. I say that's within her rights. Yes. And also want a waitress. You can't just force somebody to waitress. Yeah.

That's like indentured servitude. You have to really be good at being a waitress, okay? You can't just take orders. It'll all go hell. Yeah. Some list is like now. So she's like, yeah, I know what she's going to do. She's going to be like Friday and Saturday going,

ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, and get in drunks. And she's like, what do you want, Melissa? Or what do you want to research? She's like, I want you to work. And he's like, these two, the women's like seriously, the crazy ladies and nots. Is what is it? The boobs?

Is the vagina to make some so nuts? Is it the pellets in the ass? What's that going on? I'm deposit. No fighting. So then we go over to um... house that belongs to david so david is apparently to loris's boyfriend who i don't think we've met yet uh... and he's selling his house he's got a really cute house but um... she to loris and see if come over to help stage the house

that way he could sell it and And there are a few design challenges. For instance, there's a Ducati in the living room. And there's also like, you know what, one of those lamps, what do you call those lamps that look like they should be on a sound stage, you know? But they're like interior decor now. I feel, it's like this guy basically likes really big bold chunky pieces of decor and also like elliptical machines in front of the couch. Yeah. Do you watch this couch? And you can't even see

the elliptical machine because it's facing it's horizontal so you can't even watch a TV while you're on it. What's happening in this house? You know, I try to tell him all the time. I'm like, you know, you got to move the elliptical machine out. You know, we could put we could donate to the gym but mass is like I don't know if I want a liptical machine They only burn like one calorie like that go on below deck says, you know What can you do? You just can leave it here. You can put it to Coddy in there I don't know. It's a crazy world But you know what though? It's like I love him and I want him to move with me. I think he's great. He's a great guy Hatsu Coddy in the living room who does that?

I'm sorry. I don't like stepping on the people's furniture, but this is driving me crazy. She fixes like one of the lampshades. Stand on the table. Yeah. Please take your shoes off, Siggie. You can at least take your shoes up before you step on the table. Siggie, look, this is the kids room. Should I take down the Legos in here? No, kids are kids. Let them have Legos. Speaking of kids, Josh, he keeps saying Lego, my egg,

oh my, Lego, my egg. It's like, let's make everything about Sikii's issues. I don't want to Lego, the egg, oh. I want to hold it until it's all the way digested in this little tummy. I want to hug the Josh, oh. Oh.

I'm sick now. You know, look, here's what's happening with him. Okay. Joshua can't talk because he's upset about leaving his girlfriend. That's what it is. It's just like Frankie. Like Frankie's so upset he cannot even pour pasta into a bowl. Okay.

It's skilleted inside. He's upset. You know what? He's not even applying the colleges. He's just stabbing his fork like a caveman. I mean, stabbing a stick. He's stabbing a stick with a fork fork like I can't even say it out loud. I'm so distraught myself I talked to Maz I'm like Maz what's going on? He says come to work I said I don't want to he said okay your fighter. Okay, I'll come in

I tell you Frankie so upset that he stabbed the cowboy and cut him to pieces That reminds me of Josh See is like I can't believe that Josh was annoyed by everything. I can't believe it. Anyway, should I rant about the cake again? No kidding. I still haven't gotten the policy for the cake! So next up to reset all of this is when Sige this one see he says he is all about his girlfriend's cookie But don't forget he came out of my Corki

Where's the cookie respect. Like this is why he doesn't want to talk to you because you're talking about him coming out of your vagina. And like honestly, kids don't want to hear that about their from their moms. So Theresa Melissa, let's see. The tree says over Melania Melania. Yeah. Theresa's over with Melania. They're playing with slime, which finally feels like an appropriate activity for this family. I know. At least you can do one of their family members'

hair with it, you know? Yeah. And they're like, they're just like, they're playing with it, and then Melania got an email from Joe because they've been emailing all, you know, like every day. And it's like a, it's a nice little email and Teresa is like, hey, see, I feel bad, is because Joe's missing out on all these little moments that he's never gonna get back. and trees like, can't see, I feel bad is because Joe's missing out on all these little moments that he's never gonna get back. I'm like, missing out on making slime. Yeah, Joe's got enough slimy shit to worry about right now. Okay. So, him be he's waiting through a lot of shit right now. Also, the slime trend, every kid has been making the slime for the past year. My nieces were obsessed with it. Do you know what it's caused? A brach shortage.

Because the slime has been around. It's not like slime is new. I know that it just became like huge. Like all these kids are making YouTube videos. Like he has had it make slime. And so there's, it was like, it was like this scene. They're just putting Tupperware full of this shit. And you go to Target and you can't find borax or whatever because that's what you use to make it

That's why there was like a cleaning product next to her weird Wow, well, you know what good no, I'm like fastened by this. I think it's great I think it's great that kids are like Obsessed with like an arts and crafts project as opposed to you know something stupid like a Furby Yeah, crafts a huge Awesome craft So Disgusting sorry Teresa's like yeah, how come that email says you cried, huh? What did he say in the email?

And she's like he said that no one shapes his back like me. She's like oh email, huh? And she's like, he said that no one shapes his back like me. She's like, oh, and then he has a big heart, okay? She doesn't need more disciplines. Just, you know, she doesn't need more loves and attentions. And then she's like, come hug me. She's like, no, mom. So then, so then we go over to Siggy's house, her big party where Siggy's dancing in the kitchen. And she's just so excited because Dolores is here. And Jody, Jody one and Jody to and Pam and Margot. The kid is already Snapchatting the whole thing. She's like, look, here we are walking into door. Look, there's, there's Siggy.

Look, Siggy's hacking my mom screaming about something. It's like put the guy downchat and say hello. Don't lady There was a lady in the background whose face was so funny. I took a picture of it It's not so much that her face was funny. It's that she um her she had so much makeup on and she had this like She had this blonde haircut. I got a post. I'm gonna post this on our page, but um It was like classic Jersey, classic Jersey. I mean, the women who crawl around in the background with some of these parties just make me laugh out loud. Classic friend of Modge.

So, uh, Ziggy, of course, is like, how are you Dolores? I care. Okay, let me tell you, I'm still mad at Melissa. I mean, three apologize to me, but Melissa, Silge, nothing. Zero. You know, it's less than, but Melissa silch, nothing zero. You know, it's less than the amount of hugs I got from Josh. What did I? Also, you were the one who called tree for lunch. Tree did not call you to go to lunch.

And the only reason you called tree to go to lunch is because tree has more power on this show and you know it. So stop pretending that everybody's grown up at your feet. Exercise Melissa, Laby. Exactly. So then speaking of which, over a tree's house, a car arrives with Danielle and it's a pickup tree. And so the tree's against in the car.

And Danielle has, she's already got like a bottle of champagne for the party. And she's like, oh, should I go and grab a one? What you want me to grab a one? I can grab a one. It's like, then, no, it's fine. could go grab a one. What you want me to grab a one? I can grab a one. It's like, no, no, it's fine. It's a good one. I got the birth clickos.

And, Dermiel, did you hear from Dolores? No, and he's starting to get upset, you know? Because I don't know why he's thinking about it. Dolores? I don't know. I just keep thinking about that name. Dolores, did you hear from her? Oh, no, I'm so mad.

Are you mad at her? I'm so mad now. Are you mad at her? I'm furious. Like Teresa is such a robot. Exactly. And I love Danielle saying, now listen, I don't like to get involved in other people's relationships. But so basically, except for some molasses, the only reason molasses even on this show is because your ass was Facebook messaging her. And it was even brought up at the reunion. Like, let's drop, you know, let's stop pretending that we all forgot. Okay. Yeah.

Exactly. So basically, according to Danielle, Dolores told her, uh, be careful of Teresa because Teresa is not concerned with anyone or anything except for money. Just beware. reason because it's recess not concerned with anyone or anything except for money. Just be where? Which I mean, I would be surprised that Dolores would ever say that to Danielle, but I also

don't feel like it's inaccurate. Yeah. And it's probably she probably said something in that vein and Danielle's twisting it. Because the prop Dolores got so mad about it that it's obviously like you are taking what I said and twisting it, but you can't say that because Teresa doesn't understand how that was the Laura's probably said something like you know what she doesn't really

You know what she needs you know Joe's not there. She needs to earn money You know what she's not really focused on her friends, but now she just needs to she's focused on her work So she can get she can get her money. She can support her family. She probably said something like that She's she only cares right now about earning her money, right? She probably said that and Danielle took it as she doesn't care about friends or people. She only likes money. Yeah, this is such an asshole. But it also is so beautiful because it's watering

the bitch flower that needs to bloom. And it works. Exactly, so like that. Yeah, exactly. I can't comprehend it. Like, yeah, we're all shocked. And you'll say, good friends don't talk like that about good friends.

Classic Danielle's dog. Classic man. Classic match. So Ziggy back at the party. There's guests at this party now and Ziggy's like everyone. Tee to the best bags. The material. I just loved them so much. And then walks away. And there's a there's a pause of flowers. It says number one flicker. Yeah. Yeah. No, but one flicker Larissa says number one Flicka. Yeah. Yeah, no one flicker. It's in the Chanel number five. Yeah, number one Flicka.

Chanel number one Flicka Joshua Flicka is my Chanel number one. So then Melissa shows up. And of course, Melissa is always good for a passive aggressive. Hello, she's like, huh, I haven't heard from you guys. I haven't seen you guys. I'm Mike. What's the deal? And Ziggy's like, well, you know Melissa and Boca I was living She's like, yeah, but in your defense. I mean you call this animals. You're fucking animals Melissa. Your animals, okay? You are a cake. So I don't see why that's such such a bad thing She didn't call you a bunch of sea words and like why are you taking it so personally in terms of you know

Like you threw a cake it adds you're said y'all animals like why would you be like? I can't believe you called me an animal like weeks later. I think it's like understandable She was upset by the cake throwing so even if she doesn't remember calling an animal It's really she didn't call you to see word., okay? She didn't get real nasty, just said, you had an animal. Yeah, it's fun. I don't like an animal and Sigi won't like it over the cake and it is hilarious to me.

I don't know why it's still making me laugh, but Melissa's like, I wanna thought she'd call the next day and say, hey, I had one too many and Sigi's like, you know what got me? I would never, in a million years, do what you did to that beautiful cake. I would never pick up a beautiful cake like that

and throw it across the floor. Oh, this is laugh. She's like, okay, I'm sorry, okay, I'm gonna buy you another cake. And she's like, it's not that, buy it for that pastry chef. But, she's like, I'm not. By the way, this is a woman talking about like animals. It's not only did she pour wine on the table.

This is a woman who got stepped on a stranger's table, not a stranger, but like someone that's like not her boyfriend got and stepped on the chair and then on the table in her shoes to adjust something. So like I mean, let's talk about animals. So funny and most is like I cannot talk about cake anymore. It's like he's like everybody, everybody shut up now. I need to say something. And Dolores is just looking at the sky like oh geez Oh my god, it's like when I was an hour and a half way to the gym and I got that message from man's oh my god Here we go, so we got this for the embargo. Oh god. This could be embarrassing like when Frank didn't apologize Oh god, I mean I didn't say that. Okay. I got a pod just Frank. Oh, okay. I apologize Frank. Yeah, okay

I can cap and it's like I can do a new apology. You know, that's always you can do that If I had a cake made for your birthday and it's three tears and beautiful Specialized and quilted and has your name on it and you throw it across our restaurant How many people think that is right? Please please raise your hand and everybody raises their hand of course And she's like, thank you who throws a cake at our restaurant Who does that she throws herself down on the crowd because that's all I wanted It was amazing that's all etchie like maize herself into the cross to Now that is classic marines, okay.

Yeah, classic match. Classic match. I mean, what is this? We're like pronating ourselves out not on the floor like what is it going on here? You know what? You know what should be down on the floor? More cake.

Honestly, like, you can have your cake and you need it too, but you can't throw it apparently. That's the classic match right there. So I'll give you like a more like, soppy flicker because she's topping up all the dirt on the floor because she's lying there. You know what I'm saying? The lures is like, I don't know what prompted it to do that, but she did it.

Amalus is humiliated, and that's it. It was pretty obnoxious to do. I mean, like, you didn't need to pull the gas. And of course, you're all going to raise your hand no matter what. Who here agrees that table lamps are better than floor lamps? I was going to raise your hand no matter what because they're like I don't know I'm I guess it's the risk my hand you're the hosts. There's a crazy lady yelling at us and wanting us to raise our hand a certain way We're gonna do it. It's not like a it's not like a

Nevermind. I can't think of it's right now. I've been spending too much time on this show. It's all right So Teresa and Danielle show up and then the the ladies decide to go into separate room where it's quieter aka where production can have Easier audio to deal with so they go in the other room and they immediately started to hash out the cake thing yet again And Teresa at this point now she's just like she's over it and she's like she's like listen Okay, we ate the cake we ate the cake and then we threw the cake all right like we ate the cake, we ate the cake, and then we threw the cake. All right, like we ate it. It's okay. And I was like, she makes a good point. Like, you guys already ate it. It's already been sliced up and cut. Or just like, yeah. And then after we throw it, we have fun. And then that stuff you said was shitty. And Dolores Dolores, why after all this, we'd see crying.

Okay, like you should have said they was having fun, but you're crying. Why would you cry? And she's like, because she's my best friend. And I do that for everyone to reach that. Okay. I stand up for my friends. I have a history of loyalty. Okay. Like, let's call a spade a spade. And she's like, yeah, let's call David Spade. She's like, no, a spade a spade to reach. Okay. I stood up for you for a long time. I would never, ever, ever let someone speak, speak that way about you. And then Danielle's like, oh, you would never say anything about her. Like, well, Danielle, I get that you're trying to like segue into that. But you're what a terrible psych way.

Yeah. Well, Danielle, like words properly, Danielle opens up her murder mystery evening and the lop's like when someone says this open this, she's like, there is something you did say to me, okay? You said that Teresa only cares about money and doesn't care about anything else. And the Laura is just staring at her into Laura. She's like, she's very calm and she goes, you mother fucking liar, mother fucking liar. I never said that you're fucking liar.'re fucking liar fucking liar. You're a crazy Scumbag scumbag welcome back scumbag welcome back

You're a crazy person anyway. You're crazy. You're crazy scumbag. You're a scumbag full of scum and bags And not even paper bags plastic bags that ruined the land and aren't biodegradable You didn't even pay your ten ten cents to buy them to scum back Yeah, she just like went straight for the throat. She got up. She was like yeah Long just like what do I got a game? I don't got nothing to gain from this and she's like oh to reset. What do you think she's coming around? After the past to be your friend. Okay, look. She's a starving hungry bitch. Okay, I would never, never, never. All I have to say is sleep with one eye open Theresa,

because she's up to no good. And then they showed Theresa, and she's just standing there going, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, maybe a storyline, a spot on a TV show, you know, like more money, all of that stuff. So Dolores is saying that Danielle is back for revenge and Trees like, she's like, why would she lie? And Dolores is like, why would Danielle stop lie? And then she just turns to Danielle. And this was my favorite part. She goes, Danielle, I'm sorry, people that have your problem think that things happen. Okay And then I was like, oh now you're diagnosing me. Well, it wasn't that hard to diagnose crazy person

You've got that problem, but I love that people who have your problem. Oh my god And so this is what sets her off Danielle and because I think whatever Danielle, I don't know She's bipolar like what she has that Glorious girl to yeah if she's bipolar or like what she has that Dolores got to yeah she's stop polar so Danielle this is what upsets her so she's like I know she said it I know she said it why can't they see Helen Calla could see she's lying okay I know what I heard oh my god you obviously don't she's like it was a big she was sitting on top of the glow of a candle And she flew into my room when she said it and then a dragon tried to bite me

But she punched a dragon and I said thanks for that to Laura's, but I'm still telling to reset It's like you're crazy. It's all in your head Yeah, so yeah, I like it. I actually came in Yeah, I just wish I could understand what she's saying. Anybody, anybody know how to read hand slaps? So, tree, yeah, tree, like, she comes outside, like, to the staircase, because Danielle is chosen to cry out of banister. So tree comes over and say, hey, what happened?

What's the matter? Like, what do you mean what happened? What's the matter? You were there. You saw the whole thing. Come on. What happened in there? Did someone say something to you? Huh? And Teresa's like, well, I got a goal because like, I came with her and like, the view crew is in her car. So, huh? Gotta go all my hand. And Laura says like, Teresa, be careful. Be careful with her. And then we intercut Sige into Laura's

with Tremelis and Danielle. And she's like, she's that, Teresa. And to Laura's tells Sige, do you think I said it? Do you think I would say that and Sige goes, the way, thank, oh, whoa, whoa, whoa. So dramatic. And to Laura's. And then Melissa? Oh no, I was just gonna say Dolores said I know you know

I didn't you know Danielle have lots of problems in a life because of their relationship and now it's water under the bridge I don't think so she's she's correct and she's actually watching show Yeah, absolutely So then Melissa I thought Melissa made a pretty good point, which is that, like, when they were leaving the house, Melissa's like, you know, when Sigi cries, everyone has to bow down and be like, what's wrong, what's going on, and comfort her. And here is like a guest in her own house, and she's just sitting there being cold and

dismissive, which I thought was a good point although the truth is I Understand why Sige is called I mean I I I feel like Like if I were to get probably also would not go and comfort her but you know Because Daniel's crying because she's the one who pulled out the gun and shot somebody now. She's the one who's crying like Yeah, yeah, no, I wouldn't I mean I wouldn't expect Sige to go and do that But I did think it was an interesting point and then of course Melissa ends it with well surprise surprise I'm still waiting for an apology God it's a lorissa's like I want to Siggy if I wasn't her friend. I wouldn't want her I'm glad Melissa's not gonna be a waitress at that restaurant because she'd be asking apology from every single table

I'm just saying before the food comes now be good time to get an apology from you, maybe. Your food is half an hour late, and you're sorry, right? You're all sorry. You're sorry for that. You guys are gonna give me a free dessert, right? Because you did it with late. It's like, no. So funny.

Yeah, this season's, so every episode has been hilarious. So good, every single one. I love Dolores' explosion. So every episode has been hilarious. So good. Every single one. I love Dolores' explosion. So, so exhilarating. This is going to be an interesting one to do live. I'm going to have to work on a lot of my impressions. Yeah, I'm just going to lean into my Margaret because that's the only thing I can do. I'm just going to be Margaret into every scene. Okay, classic match. It's very very Magnet because I can't do the others. I can maybe do it to Laura So maybe a silly but my tree is just yeah, I'm hoping she's in it because she's gonna be at the she's showing Vegas So I hope that's what she's gonna be in it. Did you see this is the scene from next week?

It's gonna be a big city in Margaret fight. That's what Siggie says. I think you're an awful person for making fun of me You know who would never say that, Jon Rivers. Alright. That's how. Jon Rivers would say, can we talk? Okay, that's a lot. Maybe you knew that. Okay, you know what? I guess you don't understand. I don't think you understand Jon Rivers the way I do.

Okay, I want to ask a million times, okay? Classic match. Classic match. Very, very close to Jon Rivers. So funny. Well, everybody, that brings us to the end of another watch what crappens. We will be back tomorrow with some below deck. Yeah. We sure love you. We will talk to you tomorrow.

Bye. Talk to you, Mannyana. Bye everyone. Hey, Prime members, you can listen to Watcher Crappens Add Free on Amazon Music, download the Amazon Music app today. Or you can listen Add Free with Wondry Plus in Apple Podcasts before you go tell us about yourself by completing a short survey at Wondry.com slash survey. and Apple Podcasts. Before you go, tell us about yourself

by completing a short survey at 1dry.com slash survey.