Watch What Crappens - RHONY: Bye Bye Bridie

Episode Date: May 10, 2019

This episode of Real Housewives of New York is all cringe all the time. It's Halloween song cringe for Lu, and Ramona Sonja and Dorinda bring us some serious charity event cringe. To hear this week's bonus episode and to find Crappens on Demand video recaps, become a Patreon member at Patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens. ***New Limited Edition Shirts! "Straight to the Rosé" and "Rosé All Day" merch available at crappensmerch.com! **Crappens Live is coming to Irvine, Milwaukee, Pittsburgh, Minneapolis, Baltimore and Nashville. Find ticket links at watchwhatcrappens.com See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.Our Patreon Extras: https://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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Sue, Sue Studio. Give them hell, Miss Noel. Kelly Grant, the Grant Master. We love you guys. guys! Hello and welcome to Watch With Crappings, the podcast about all that crap we just love to talk about on Yale Brows. I'm Ronnie Carram, and as usual I'm from the Rose Prick's Bachelor podcast which just came back.

So go listen, and here I am with Ben Mandelker, my little bestie. He is the creator of Real Housewares of Kitchen Island, which you can always find on YouTube so go subscribe to that. Hi, Bian. Hi, how are you? Good, what's going on? Well, I mean, I went to IKEA yesterday, so I'm still just kind of like coming down from that high.

That IKEA, that Swedish meatball high. That Swedish high, and I've gotta say, you know my Shannon Bedouard chair? Can sort of hear it a little bit. David, David! Well, I got a new chair because I just I felt like it was timed up great after 15 years so this may be the last we hear the Shannon Bedor chair so God you sound like David I know I like something thrown in the trash just send me the trash I guess David will be sitting on someone else.

I guess he's a reversion that he met on the beach. Oh, I guess just like David, I've been upgraded for a Swedish model. Everybody here is the quickest show you are ever going to hear. Are you ready? Watch what crap in life is coming to you. Okay? Those are our live shows. Okay, what do you want from me about it? We're gonna be in Irvine next week. It's gonna be a great show. We're in Orange County and we're gonna be doing the season for me of Southern John. And then guess what we're going after that. We're going to Milwaukee. Then we're going to

Mill Minneapolis, which is sold out, then we're going to Cleveland, Ohio, there's still some tickets for that, then we're going to Pittsburgh, that's sold out, then we're going to Baltimore and Nashville, both still have a few tickets, so go get them now. Hey, the best thing you're ever going to do for yourself. And then we're selling shirts, we've got limited shirts this month, our Rose Alde, breakfast Breakfast Suncheon Dinner, and straight to the rosé! And we have another podcast called The Winter Is Crapening Podcast It's all about Game of Thrones,

and those shirts are shut up, brand. You can find links to all of our live shows, and you can find links all of our merchandise over at www.crapens.com School of the K! Also, I did the set podcast with Laura this week, right after we did our Vanderpump Rules podcast. So I did a nice four hour deep dive.

Wow. Vanderpump Rules this week. The Lara one is like two a little over two. So go check that out. We love Lara over here. And she has a great show. That is so funny because I was thinking about texting her being like, hey, I want to come back

on your show, but now it'll sound like I'm being competitive. Well there you go. I'm not going to for like a few more weeks. Well I just slipped down the street from her and her person had dropped out so I was like oh sure why not. I don't need to shut up. What the hell what are they all am I gonna do play some video games? I'll be right over man. Well everyone go listen to that because you two are two of the funniest people I know. B-ing! That was really fun.

We talked about a lot of Vanderpump rules, conspiracies, and drug addictions and stuff like that. It was fun. And yeah, so go listen. And today is the cringiest episode that we've had in a long time if Real Housewives of New York. I know at least seven days.

Wow. Yeah. Real Housewives of New York. Wow. Wow. And by cringey, you mean hysterical because I was cracking up at the end there. Cracking up. You have really fucking funny.

So and also horrible. So let's get into it, shall we be in? Yes, that's a very spooky episode. Um, this one takes place at Halloween, because Kenneth Lwann is finally doing her big Halloween party in the Kimpton Hotel. And the episode opens up with Lwann and her sweet and a lady named Mary, who's a makeup artist, comes in and she's like, I'm your psychiatrist, which unfortunately is also probably true.

Well, they laugh so hard when she said psychiatrist. I mean, the laughing never stopped. She's like, I'm your psychiatrist. Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH I mean that's a real bitch. Yeah, so Victoria shows up and She's gonna be like an escapee patient at this big party and They've got the whole downstairs decked out like a mental hospital like one of those scary mental hospitals and everything and Everyone's getting ready for the big show. Well, I mean says she's gonna be an escapee, Luangos, an escapee. Of course you are. That's her. Well, I mean, that is pretty scary. Are you being an escapee, escapee?

Unlike me, I didn't escape. I was stuck behind bars, having baloney sandwiches thrown at my face. So then, Dharinda is getting packed because she's moving. So she's in the process of moving. And you know, she just wants to make sure that they don't take her Halloween stuff because Dorenda can't help herself, you know? She's one of those moms who like every time she passes a dollar store and they have like

a 10 cent off sale of the past holiday, she's like, Dallia now! Yeah. She has a locker somewhere in Brooklyn that is full of just strange Halloween and Christmas decorations from the past 15 years Yeah, and she's like Everyone's going to nurses so what about this instead and it's this black glitter rabbit costume It's like Ariana Grande-ish Yeah, what's that trippy movie?

costume. It's like Ariana Grande-ish. Yeah, what's that trippy movie? Donnie Darko? Yeah, it's very Donnie Darko. Derinda Darko. Yeah, Derinda Darko Grande. Yeah, you go to sleep and you wake up and you're not sure if Derinda really was like sobbing all over you and calling you a stupid horror. Or if that really happened. Yeah, you're sitting in a movie theater and you look to the left and there's Derinda watching it with you and you're like, whoa! But no one else can see you're. You know D'Arunda and Ariana Grande do have some similarities mainly in that their diction is terrible. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, She's like, oh my god, I'm gonna be an angel. Like seriously, what am I gonna do? What else am I gonna do? I'm gonna be an angel, of course.

Like seriously, I'm gonna have wings. This net, I'm wondering if anyone else is gonna dress like this because you know what? I deserve to dress like an angel. That's it, I'm gonna wear wings, that's it. That's it, that's it. That's it, that's what I'm doing. I mean, I mean, even though I'm going

to the Victoria Secret Fashion Show like in a week, I'm just like an angel before me, and I'm gonna scoot them, okay, you like so that, I can't have a, I gotta be an angel, okay? Sorry. And then her makeup guys, like guys like have you seen card actions today? And she's like no like what like seriously? What are my waking up in the morning and like having cereal and like looking at what the card actions are doing like what the Why would I give a crap? All right?

Well, they're all angels. She's a fucking Christ. All right. Oh my god This is exactly like what I'm wearing except I'm like 40 years older than them like I can't wait till there's a side by side of me next to candle fucking Jenna great great By the way if you ever say to me. Did you see the Kardashians today? Just throw yourself down a staircase? We're no longer friends But don't care only Beth me would think that she's gonna be the only sexy angel on Halloween. Yeah. Like, is she thinks? I mean, she really, she really thinks she cornered the market on this like novel idea of a sexy angel. What are you gonna tell me? Someone's gonna be a sexy pirate because I will not deal with that.

All right. You know what I'm gonna do? I'm gonna change it up. I'm gonna be a sexy devil and all I'm gonna do is wear some lingerie and a few little horns in my hair. And that's it. Brand new idea idea brand new costume idea, okay? So then Luann is getting her makeup still in that hotel room and apparently Luann's makeup job is like the cast of lame is Parading around about her face for three and a half hours I've I've never seen somebody take three and a half hours to get their makeup done when it's just like normal Prif makeup. Yes, it's like normal, like, lipstick, foundation, whatever.

Like it was not, this was, she was not being transformed into like Professor Clump, okay. She was literally just the same as usual. I'm so nervous. I have to remember my dance is, okay, wait, hold on. Step, step, touch. No, step touch, it's step touch. Ha, ha, ha, ha. Three steps forward, three steps back, it's step, touch. It's step, touch.

Three steps forward. Three steps back. Three steps forward. Two steps back. No, three steps back at all times. God, why am I so hard? One step forward. Two steps back. Oh wait, I'm sorry.

That's my, that's my, my, my drug and alcohol three-up plan. Sorry, I'm reading the wrong book. Well, I'm just gonna have to call up MCSKAT to make sure I got these tips correct. What's that forward, Joseph's phone? I mean, I'm no Bob Fossett. Hello, Tommy. This is your good friend, Luand, and Elisabes. I need some emergency choreography right now. I don't know why I'm saying words incorrectly. I guess it's very a propo of me. Well, this performance, you know,

some performances I'm singing as Luan, but this performance, being more Madonna, I was like, well, at least she picked Madonna and not somebody who's like on key consistently, you know. Yeah, exactly. So, um, yeah, she's like, I have four backup dancers, four, and they're all really hot. I mean they're really cute I mean what I'm trying to say is I'll be fucking each one of them here. I'm just Kim's in bed. That's what I'm saying So Barbara downstairs Barbara comes in a slash or no she comes into the hotel room I guess right? Yeah, the other room. Yeah. Yeah, she's dressed to slash and it actually looks like slash dressed as Barbara I have to say I know which by the way not always a look that you want to go for

Like I don't know who I feel worse for slash or Barbara. I know slash is at home like god damn it Yeah, I just like got me He's like all these years of being a rocker turns out I I just looked like a middle-aged woman who works in construction in New York. Which he kindly does, a song about American Idol a while back. You know, give that man a jackhammer. Yeah, he really does. I mean, he looks like he could be working at like, you know, a beauty salon in the Maranek. So anyway, Barbara comes in because she, I'm not gonna roll gotta get the let out

Gotta get the let out Hey, I'm so much like this is long dead. I'm a face doing geometry Which is apparently a reference to a jethro toll song that we did not realize yeah I didn't you know I was like did Ramona just say snot coming down my face I thought you know because you never know what Ramona just say, not coming down my face? I thought, you know, because you never know what Ramona's talking about. She's in her own little world. But apparently, yeah, she didn't know what she was talking about.

Well, but she, and yet she still didn't at the same time, because she made a reference to Jothra Toulin instead of Led Zeppelin. Yeah, I think she was just like, I'm a rocker. Well, yellow summer, we sandwiched okay. So Sonia is really impressed with Barbara's outfit. And I think she's just glad that Barbara's not dressed too hot to me. So she has more of a chance with Beth and me. Yeah, and I think that Barbara must have known that Ramona wasn't gonna be there because

she was all about showing her mid-riff again. Because that's like Barbara's favorite thing and it's Ramona's least favorite thing. And it was out. Full on slash mid-riff. So Beth and me. So Bethany. So Bethany, oh, go ahead. No, it's gonna say probably the same thing. That Bethany, it's 843 PM and by the fact that they're even showing that it's 843 PM,

it means that Luanne will be extremely late. We just know this already. And Bethany shows up and she's like, oh, what's going on? I'm trying to be like 15 minutes late and I'm like the first one here. Like guess what? It's like this angel arrived early. Like, you know what? Like, I got other things to do in heaven, okay? One last angel in heaven, you, what's going on? I'm trying to be like 15 minutes late, and I'm like the first one here. Like, guess what? It's like, does Angel arrive early? Like, you know what? Like, I got a lot of things to do in heaven, okay?

One last angel in heaven, you know what I'm saying? You know what I'm saying? It's like, fall in angel, and I fell into a party that's like shit. Okay, hey, there's Ben Remla. Okay, I'm gonna see in here, and I'm gonna be like, he ends like this for a little bit. Like, one foot up, one foot down, one foot up, one foot down.

Okay, we're gonna do this for the next 45 minutes. Okay, sounds fun. Okay, love it, love it. I know she's so awkward. She's like, okay, what am I supposed to do now? What am I supposed to talk to somebody? Like, seriously, what is this? And so she sees Lou Ann's so awkward. She's like, okay, what am I supposed to do now? What am I supposed to talk to somebody like seriously? What is this and so she sees Louis musical director? He's like, hi honey. How you doing? All right, you know what we got to dance because like seriously is so awkward like she sounded a text saying

I know you guys don't want to be out late so I performed at 11 a set of one in the morning So you know what I'm gonna leave it at 11.15. That's it So so then like we then see like some more time passes. Now it's 9.15 and Bethany and Ben are still doing their weird little dance. This like side to side, I call it like the Barmat's Fishuffle. It's like what your aunts and uncles do when like the new song

by little yoddy comes on. They don't know what it is, but they still want to dance. They're like, okay, okay, I'll dance to this. I'm cool. I'm young. I know what's up. All right. You know what Barmat's business has changed a lot. So it's my base. Yeah, yeah. I mean, what they can do, YMCA, okay, I'll dance to this. I'm cool. I'm young. I know what's up. All right, you know what, but it's just changed a lot since my day. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, what they do. Um, YMCA. Okay. How about how about it instead of YMCA?

How about YMCA? Why am I here? Okay. That's a better song. Okay. She's like, wow, you know, you know what little little man who talks like Carol on a band there? Okay, you know, it's really your favorite place for the way to be. You know, I mean, what is she not an alcoholic anymore? But she like suddenly not like addicted to alcohol because it's everywhere. This is like where alcohol came to be born to live, okay? What else is new? I know. I'm bending your shoes.

Well, she's reckless, you know, you know, if anything happens to it, it won't, it won't be from being overly careful. You know what I'm saying? She's basically drunk right now. That's what I'm saying. She's basically drunk right now. That's what I'm saying. She's like, all right. Yeah. That's the answer. I don't know if it's the answer I was looking for. I think, you know, we win. You know what she is.

Probably back there blowing some rails. You know, shooting up some say, love you. You know how it goes. Some say, ball, say, ball. That like it's just learned, you know? You know how it goes. Some say, bon say bon. Ha ha ha ha ha. I like it's just learned, you know? So then Tinsley comes in and she's, is she an angel too? No, she's a nurse.

Oh, she's a nurse also. Oh my God, you're an angel, Bethany. Bethany's like, I'm a super angel, all right? I'm a super angel. She's like, yeah, you're a super angel. Ha ha ha. And then Daringa arrives. She's wearing this like dark. she's like Angel of death or something

She's like all in this weird black thing, but she's not wearing her rabbit ear her Ariana Grande rabbit ear thing So she's just she's just like sort of goth and dark and then John is there and I don't really know what John is It seemed like maybe it was like a Darth Maul moment like he had like a black mask on and like a robe But like a hood it was it was odd. He's just a terrifying dry cleaner. He's like You remember me You look like a Victoria secret model. It's hot Yeah, he literally just like he like lifted up his mask and just like standard like Yeah, he literally just like he like lifted up his mask and just like standard like

Hey, there's also Yeah, so then upstairs Luann is still taking forever and so everyone's getting antsy So Sonia and Barbara decide to go downstairs. At this point, it's now 9.49 pm. So it's been an hour since Bethany's been there. So we know that Bethany's getting pretty annoyed. Yeah, 9.49. And Sonia is starting to feel Bethany's energy, you know? Yeah, like you can tell that Sonia's like, um, are we supposed to be down at the party?

I'm going down to the party. So she finally goes down and she's like, um, are we supposed to be down with the party? I'm going down to the party. So she finally goes down and she's like, and the war hall. And I thought, oh my God, this party is gonna be triggering from her. You know, triggering for her. Cause you know that every costume, so new seats, you're just gonna remember hanging out

with them back in the bay. I think that this Halloween, I'm just gonna dress up like a bunch of papers and just call myself Morgan Letters and just tell everyone, you don't touch the fucking Morgan Letters. So Barbara dances up to Tinsley and Durand and she's like dancing, she's like,

she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she's like, she The first impressions have me and John Mayer getting hair all open my neck. I thought it was John but he didn't smell like tsunami. He's wondering who this person was, he smells like wood chips and old raccoon. And it's your Bob, right? It's you. So then they were very careful to put in a shot of tinsley picking up a baby off the

floor. I don't know why but it was pretty funny. I love that tinsley picking up a baby off the floor. I don't know why, but it was pretty funny. I love that Tinsley's like a nurse with a baby. Tinsley can't even let it go in her costume. Of course, I don't know if I'm ready for this baby. I want to have Ausman first. I love this. She's like in a scary maternity ward.

So now it's like 10-20 and Lewand's still not there. And now it's 10-45 and Lewand is still doing her makeup, which as you said, is like very normal makeup and her makeup woman is just, I guess Mary, is just kissing her ass and everything. She's like, this is gonna be very different from the cabaret and then I was like, totally, totally different from the cabaret.

I mean, in the cabaret, I was like totally totally different from the cabaret. I mean in the cabaret there's no backup dancers. In this there's a backup dancer. In the cabaret no one throws baloney at your face. In this I have to have a baloney guard up at all times. My hair's bigger totally different. So Sonya is looking ramps she's like where's thea and during the tells her yeah if you like I mean she's don't be no nice. And Sonya goes I know what she's doing she's over at Omar's doing the social climbing thing. Yeah. This is Sonya's new thing against Ramona that she's social climbing. Well Sonya seems to be exasperated at at both Ramona and the

WAN. She just feels like everyone's becoming too much of a diva. Which I kind of like, I like that Sonia is just sort of quietly annoyed at everyone, but she's not really angry. She's just like, ah, these bitches. And then just goes, all the way. So just calling everybody out this year, and I'm really liking that.

Yeah. So now Bethany is getting annoyed, because now it's 11 o'clock, the clock struck 11, and you knew that the moment it hit 11 Then the timer was on like that the countdown is on until Bethany leaves and so she's like I mean I don't know like where she like why did she come down saying hello like what why can't she say oh she what why don't you come Have a bathroom her I don't think I'm gonna be like hi. Hi. Hi you guys. How's it's happy to see you guys How's it going so much is happening? I gotta go guys. How's it going? I got so much I got to see you do things Try to laugh how did I about buddy be blah blah blah blah blah what's happened? What's going on? What's going on?

What's going on? We're going what's going on? I'm just looking always with the happy with the happy I'm gonna be a part of the party, be a part of the party, be a part of the party, be a part of the party, be a part of the party, be a part of the party, be a part of the party, be a part of the party, be a part of the party, be a part of the party, be a part of the party, be a part of the party, be a part of the party, be a part of the party, be a part of the party, be a part of the party, be a part of the party, be a part of the party, be a part of the party, be a part of the party, be a part of the party, be a part of the party, be a part of the party, be a part of the party, be a part of the party, be a part of the party, be a part of the party, be a part of the party, be a part of the party, be a part of the party, be a part of the party, be a part of the party, be a part of the party, be a part of the party, be a part of the party, be a part of the party, be a part of the party, be a part of the party, be a part of the party, be a part of the party, be a part of the party, be a part of the party, be a part of the party, be a part of the party, be a part of the party, be a part of the party, be a part of the party, be a part of the party, be a part of the party, be a part of the party, be a part of the party, be a part of the party, be a part of the party, be a part of the party, be a part of the party, be a part of the party, be a part of the party, be a part of the party, be a part of the party, be a part of the party, be a part of the party, be a part of the party, be a part of the party, This is too much lies and let's how she's acting now. Hey, you won't go in the back and rev yourself on my foot. But I'm like, my God, Jesus Christ. Get him away from me. And the way I'm in her room doing a great vine by yourself, which is hysterical. I love that Luanne is acting like she's she's having her first foray into modern dance. You know, I know. She's also acting like she's having her first foray into modern dance you know I know she's also acting like she's having her first foray and at like a performance at the Tony's okay because she's like up there in in her kimpton suite I don't

know like he mentioned Kimpton and they're not as far as I do love a we love a Kimpton hotel Kimpton if you're out there listening we're on to where we love a hotel yeah we can be saying I love a Kimpton every day yeah not just today we a Kimpton every day. Yeah, not just today. We could say it every day, if you want a sponsor, awesome. OK. And Bob literally loves a Kimpton, like no matter what the city, he don't even need to look at the pictures.

So he'll be like, yeah, I'll book the Kimpton. I go home to the ketone in New York. I'm like, I'm saying at the Kimpton, they're like, there is no Kimpton. I don't care. It's a state of mind. Kimpton is a state of mind. And I get it now. I'm totally addicted to. So Lou ends up there for her saying and so she's trying to remember her dance news but

she's also kind of like also trying to remember her lyrics so she's like she can She's gonna turn left right right damn it. I can't get this right. She's All right, you know what I gotta go in four minutes. That's it. That's it And so he's like, well, she said 11. I mean she needs hair and makeup for three hours in a hotel sweet Camp in hotel I can't buy that you leaving right? I gotta let my baby sit it up I told the two airs have to spend three hours. It's like, what is she doing over there? You know, poor thing. There's only so much trouble you can play

by yourself without a partner. What's that poor girl doing? And so she's out of there. She leaves right when this shows. And by the way, when she says, I have to let the babysitter go. My first instinct was your rich, like your babysitter can last another 45 minutes.

But then I realized that she actually probably tied up the babysitter and she a chub during a closet and it's like now it's like okay I got a letter out the closet otherwise she could pee in there. What's the matter is is chain to a radiator somewhere like. I mean I promise I let him off the radiator. So they go and Durinda is just kind of watching it with her and she's got these big recunis painted onto her face And so which is really funny because Dorenda gets so drunk and to have her makeup already looking like that Yeah, it's funny to see her starting fresh but looking like the end of the night, you know Yeah, she's like

You know what? It's fascinating. I'm big up the energy definitely increases when she comes out to sing her two songs. Which is so rude to Girl Code because she has a third song. She sure does. Yeah. And then Sonya is totally into it like dancing on tables and shit. Yeah. So yeah, it was a great moment of shade from Durinda.

So then Luanne does her, she does, it's, you know, we see another Luan performance and everything and then she's like, well, I mean, I am no JLo, but I think I did okay. And by the way, I am JLo. I mean, I've done a mot-a-motown montage as well. I mean, I've been waiting for tonight. So, Tim's, he's like, my little, I was really good to see you for five seconds. I guess I'll be taking my new baby home. God is our princess baby. So, we had so many, we had so many. Luans like, where are the other girls? Where are the girls? Where's Ramona? And Dorenda's like, well, you know Bethany had to go, she has a baby sitter. Yeah, I mean, Bren is waiting up at 11 o'clock at night. Come on.

See, she got a lot of blue hand being bitchy. And she took three and a half hours to come down. And she's like, oh, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Yeah, I mean brinn is waiting up at 11 o'clock at night. Come on Lou Ann being bitchy and she took three and a half hours to come down. I know Luann like

That's ridiculous that you did not need to take three hours like to or do your performance earlier or something I don't know but like come on Come on I also like that she went you her that Ramona didn't drop. And when I was like, she didn't. What? That's not cool. She should be so lucky that Ramona didn't drop because you know Ramona would have caused a big sin.

Yeah. She would have been up on that stage. Money can't play class. I'm going to pull all these class right now. That's not cheap. So now we go over to Tindley's apartment the next day where Dale is sitting on the couch doing needle point and she's making it or I think it's needle point. I don't know.

She's still making that stocking. Yeah, she's working on yet another stocking. She's like, Tinsley, it's yoga for the mind. You know, because my mind is very stressful about how could I raise such an immature, unchilded given daughter? I keep trying to put Tinsley on this, but it keeps coming out barren. I don't know how I'm doing that. I tried to make one for your Tinsley, I saw her with a T, and then I saw her daydream, and next I can know her wrote Toppa.

Importantly, she's still hanging on. She's like, I still can't believe I was in the big Apple circuit. It was so fun, Tinsley. It was like a dancer saddle, which you never had. No, because I didn't want you to have one. It's just you just never coordinated enough to do even something as simple as a dancer saddle when you were six years old. I remember going to those dancer's saddles alone and looking at other people's children and thinking, good for them. Good for them. I guess I do understand what's like not to have a child after all. And she's like, well, here's my mugshot coasters that I got. Aren't these awesome?

You can put your team on my mugshot. She's like, that's exactly what a mother wants to see. Oh, look, there's no baby in this picture either, Tinsley. Oh, I wonder if Topper has any of these. Probably nox. I don't think he's been arrested and he has a child. You don't have to put baby bottles down on a coaster. Did you kid you have any baby bottles that have your face on us? We could use those when we feed Topper's child.

Do you have any coasters with your unused old age and senior citizen eggs? We can. Oh, we should definitely submit this to the next article for ARP magazine, which I'll hear you'll be on the cover of Quatsang. She's like, I gave some of these coasters to the wind with her headshot. She didn't take it too well. We see a cliff of her in the park, giving the coasters to the wind with her headshot she didn't take it too well we see a clip of her in the park yeah giving the coasters to the wind and the way I'm like these are horrible why would I want to see this picture she's like it's

supposed to be funny it's a pure sense of humor sucks tinsley oh god so then so now tinsley starts talking about the circus and how like all those emotions are to hit her and you know how you know they were like children and families and happiness and boyfriends and more boyfriends of people who own their their families and that's just borrowed them from their boyfriends and I was surprised you were so upset I thought you'd be on a high but you went like boo down down down down tinselin oh you went down it looked like your face literally fell down a flight of stairs as you started crying I knew that would happen since I saw

that trapeze I thought damn damn, those trap piece swinging, just gonna remantinsely of the pendulum of time, ticking away as our uterus turns slowly into a desiccated cactus. Watching you was like watching the opposite of a clown car. A car that's too big and you open the doors and nothing comes out. A car that's too big and you open the doors and nothing comes out. Oh, and you try to fill it up with hopes and dreams, but there's a trap door on there.

Just a car full of empty car seats. Yeah, let's see a monkey walking around on a bar at the circus. Just wondering. You're gonna be the bearded lady if you don't watch out. I'm talking about all those hormones you've been taking. So, Tinsley's like, I was trying to act like it was okay, but I'm not okay. But, you know, I figure if you're gonna lose it and be emotional, you should do it rest as a clown with pink cheeks, right? Oh! Oh, not do it at all, Tinslet, not do it at all.

Oh, you can just have a baby. So yeah, so Tinslet's basically like, still holding on to that dream of having a husband, a child, and a house, and she wants, she basically wants to share her baby with a man and not her mom. But guess what? It's gonna be the mold. Yeah. So now she's gonna go back to it.

Oh, I'll be, but I'm gonna be doing volunteer work and hopefully I'll attract a man who sent that stuff. Oh, it's in slate. Yeah, you know, that's a type. Guys who are attracted to charity work. Yeah, oh god. I love her, I love her chicklit series that she is like a part of, you know, like,

this is like book number three. Tinsley goes volunteering. Sorry, I was taking it too long. I know, sorry. I could hear it. I heard the gurgling, but I wanted to give you your space. That's the gurgling. Yeah, I was gurgling coffee. I'm like,

ah! Tinsley volunteering. I mean, it's like it's so rom-comy or it's even sick-comy. Like, society girl goes volunteering to meet a man. Yeah. And Delcos, Barcelona said, now that you're single, you're gonna have tons of men flying at you. She goes, Well, she'll probably take a fudge. No, I meant at the circus, a lot of trapezoz. She's gonna fly right at you, but then they'll swing right back up on that trapeze.

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as we talk about the hardest job in the world, listen to, I love my kid, but wherever you get your podcasts, you can listen ad free on the Amazon Music or Wondery app. So then we go over to Ramona, Cafe Cognac, okay? No, I was sipping from coffee. Um, yeah, so Durinda Ramon and Sonia go do a lunch where they're gonna meet up with a woman named Brydie and also a woman named Carolyn and Andrew

It's very like society women are gonna go Do some charity work. It reminded me a lot of that movie Everyone says I love you where Goldie Hawn is like this New Yorker society lady who just loves a charity case and she like takes in Tim Roth who is this like like escaped criminal and like throws like a little like fundraiser for her. I'm not saying Brydie is that at all. I'm just saying I just I, I'm just thinking about Goldie Han. Can I just have that? This table made me think of Sesame, I think it's Sesame Street where they have those weird looking little

marionette puppets, and they all have crazy faces. That's what the friends look like. Yeah, it reminded me of a... Yeah, it reminded me of a... It was like a Genesis video from like 88, you know, those weird puppets. Yeah, either way terrifying. I think we can all agree it was pretty scary. Yeah, so Ramona is like, whoa, this is my friend Caroline. She opened the Hamptons. Like what? Is that what she said?

Maybe she mentioned a party that opened the Hamptons season or something like that. And then she opened the Hamptons. Caroline started the Hampt season or something like that. And then she opened the Hampton's. Kierle has started the Hampton's, okay? Yeah, well, because why? Why does it stay as ageless as possible? I decided to hang out with younger people. It just seems like because I took, I looked so good for my age,

these men and women in their 30s and 40s approached me all the time. And you know why? I'd like to energy, can they make me feel younger so why not okay? Yeah, it's crazy just all kinds of young people approach me young men young women young puppies I mean eggs before they even hatch if you ever hung out with the egg before telling you what you have to come up with a lot of Confessation, but it's worth it. Yeah The worst things I ever felt was that time I dropped an egg on the floor

I was like I just killed my friend okay. Don't tell anyone So she's like okay, let me tell you why I'm here. So Birdie found me through safe horizon which is for domestic abuse and her charity New York loves kids It's a sexually abused children, which is horrific. Okay, I'm getting children so I talk about it right now I don't even want to talk about it right. That's it Gip check. I don't even want to talk about it right now I want to talk about it. Good boy. I was like, oh wait, we still have to plan a fundraiser of Ramona So birdie. Share your story. Okay She's like, well, my name is Brydie and

She tells a story a horrific story about being molested for months and months and then when she finally had the strength to say something about it, the statute of limitations had already expired. So the guy is out there and not a problem. Like right. So this charity is to do away with the statute of limitations on victims. And so to rend, like, victims. Right. And so Durand is like, we found guys you were voicing this city contact you in the poly guys. Uh, so Durand is starting to get in there with her questions and I already

started to kind of cringe. Even though her question wasn't bad, because I just remember Durand had drunk with Bethany when they went, went out of town with Bethany's charity people and they're like, we help get people into college and turn to say, people in hey, go to college, see me coming. Yeah. So Ramona is like very excited to take up this cause. And she's excited that that, um,

Brydie has come to her because she's like, whoa, Brydie knows that I'm an influencer. Kay, I have a lot of friends who support me, support any cause I believe in. For instance, I believe in the cause of hanging out with my best friend, Slash, daughter, Avery. You can't even tell us apart. Kay. I believe in the cause sitting at whatever table that you think you're assigned at the

Angel Bar. Okay, with that charity. I believe in being ageless, okay? And then so Sony is like, so Brydie, you know that Ramona's been calling you birdie this old time, right? That makes no sense. Kay Ramona, you're in the corner work, getting name right, Romina. Okay,

Romina, getting name like Romina, okay, me Me like Like we can hear you to read yeah, we got the joke we got the joke so most like good one to We're excited about this event. You know what we're gonna have a lot of people we're gonna make a big change It we're just gonna like snowball. It's just gonna be a big snowballing event and so on is like yeah Yeah, you could just exploit us. It's great. I mean like I do children too It's like so now you have, you could just exploit us. It's great. I mean, like I do children too. It's like, Sonya, you have to think about the words that come out multiple times in this episode.

Oh, she says I do children too. I mean, you do and then everyone just looks at her completely awkward. What I'm saying is that you really touched me. God, everyone's staring at you like it's so awkward and she doesn't even get it. She's like, I mean, you do sexual abuse. I do children. We may not be the most eloquent, but we're passionate. And we may not be the most passionate either. But we're here and we may not even be here because I'm already walking out the door. So then Durinda's

new apartment, John comes over and you can tell because he has a special ring on the doorbell. Hi baby. I'm here. Sounds like a dentist's office, little suction cup. It comes over with flowers and turns it like, what can German you home? Can I have beautiful things? And he's like, I love to see the place. I can't wait to sit on this couch. Where's the table I'm going to put my feet up on?

Let me envision it. Yeah, I can see that. All right, look, envision me bent over the couch and he's spanking me with the fly swatter. Yeah, I love this living room. Yeah, I'm going to be great here during that. Be my guest, be my guest, be my kitchen fuck outta here. He's my ass, man. Do, be my kitchen fucker here, he's my assland, you're just a me loin

order zhan. I didn't want anyone to see this place before you think here. I didn't want to hear what they thought about the view, what they thought about the kitchen, what they thought about the new toys, what they thought about the Hollywood food. I don't care, This is my place. First time I've done something for me in 25 years. It's been 25 years, isn't that something for me? Yeah, this is a very private moment to me. I just want it for me.

I didn't even invite to scarecrow over, okay? That's how serious I am. He's got the old place. So, a bedroom, this is Wakingly's salad family, huh? She's like, listen, how's this certain age? You shouldn't even is waiting to set a family, huh? She's like, listen, how's it through, Nage? You shouldn't even be able to set a family, okay? I don't even want to plant in my ass, right? Meanwhile, he's trying to act like he's moving in and she's like, you know, John, sorry. She's like, listen, we can't live together. We have 2,000 square foot apartment for 12,000 square feet of

Personality I'll just say personally. I'll be nice. I'll be nice to John He's like good So then we go over to Bethany at a restaurant and Bethany enters a restaurant as she always says like I think it's for people my name is Bethany you don't need my last name. I mean I know you know it like seriously like You know I guess from the first one here shocker. All right. We're we're not gonna go. It's for four people I said that already is that a table for four people just four people for people okay I mean this one right now, but I don't want to wait until they're all here because they're always late I mean what are you gonna do? Yeah, it's like four people okay? All right. I'll have a mascot thing not to sweet

Okay, not to salty though like not to I don't see just give me some ice cubes, okay, and a spritz of mezcal, and you know what, like all right, we'll get seafood tower, and we'll get salmon, and we'll get some gochis balls, and then we'll get like, just give me a bone, I just wanna bone, just put a bone on the table, that's all I want, okay, that's good. And so during the intense year there,

and during this, like, you know, I knew this weekend, you know, there's two bedrooms, but really shut off. And people want to come visit the Gulu Hotel. All right. Yeah. I really hope that people bring her a whole bunch of like sharks, fish and marlins and stuff for our new apartment. That's my dream.

So much of dead fish. Bethany's just going to put all the shells from the seafood tower into a bag and be like, here, it's your ass warming. Here it is. Yeah, it makes you feel like, huh? So, um, yeah, so then so on your shows up. And Bethany starts talking about how, um, Lue, uh, she texted Lue to say, uh, hey, you know, sorry, I had to leave. And Luean takes back like, oh, sorry, you didn't make it. I heard your costume was over the top. And now of course Bethany feels like that was not a compliment. Because the thing is, I can imagine saying that to someone like in person, and it's like totally a compliment like, oh my god, I heard it was over the top, and amazing.

But when you get it on text, especially in that context, you're thinking, what a fucking bitch trying to make it dig at me. And that's exactly how Bethany took it. Bethany who makes digs at everybody all the time. Which is hilarious. What does that even mean? She came on to your black face in the nafro. You're over the top, okay?

I didn't even say that. I didn't say that. I'm like, oh, yeah, you did. Yes, you most certainly did, ma'am. And Tim's is like, yeah, that's a dig. So, yeah, she's queen of the dig. She used to love to wrap an insult in the shiny bow and now she's doing it again.

You're like, oh my god, thank you for criticizing me. That is beautiful. What a beautiful get. Thank you. And then we see some of Luan's greatest hits, which is amazing. I think it doesn't even scratch the surface. She's had so many of them.

But yeah, we get to see Luan that moment from like season two when Luan and Bethany were having drinks and Luan's like, now before we have these cocktails, I just want to make sure you even invited me to cocktails and it's not that I leave and then you're going to complain about me not paying later because you say I'm a cheap ass bitch when I'm actually countess. Well, that scene was so good because that's when they were fighting and they weren't speaking and Bethany goes, all right, you know, we stuck this out. Let's go have drinks and the way I'm like, all right, fun. Come to the Hamptons. Let's meet Bethany go all the way to the Hamptons. Go hours away. And then she finally goes there to make up for there. She's like, you're paying, right?

I mean, classic. Classic. So then, D'inda is not cause now they're all like, it's feeding friends you time on the way and so D'Aurinda of course sells the way and I'm telling Bethany that L'Wan made that comment about like, oh, Bethany is going home, what? To watch Bri- Bri- Bri- I'm gonna say Bri- L. Bri- Ann's, Bri- There's so many Brians and Brians and Bri- L's in my life right now, I can't even tell which one. Brynn, Brynn's sleep, Brynn, Brynn, I know the word Brynn. What does that even mean?

Like, what'd you go out tonight, clubs every night while you were raising your kid? Like, why is she always making these six at me? I just don't get it. I don't get it. Like, what the hell? Like, she should work in a cemetery with those digs. Like, seriously.

She never says it to my face. And then, turns, she goes, yeah. And then there was the dig about the room. Remember the room. And she's like, yeah says it to my face and then turns it goes yeah And then there is the dick about the room member the room And yeah, yeah, yeah, that's all these little dicks I don't like and the trend is like cuz she only lives in the moment It's not history now. She's a count is she's flawless for anything that happened in the past Yeah, and then yeah, they're like I think Bethany says yeah She has delusions of grandeur and then so I'm just like yeah She's surrounded by says, yeah, she has the Lucian's a grandeur. And then somebody's like,

yeah, she's surrounded by groupies all the time that just agree with anything she says. I'm like, have you been to Wednesdays at your townhouse before? Yeah. And then Bethany's like, all right, here's my list. I'm making a list. She, there was the room with the Berkshires,

then there was the costume, the costume comment, and now she made a comment about my dad are sleeping. All right, at five, she better watch out. Because there will be another intervention, and I will be there, but there will be another invention. Yeah, why is that okay? I don't know, I don't know. I mean, the wind is for sure going to be for you.

Something nice for you, and then like never let you go. Like, I really, you need another, you want me to get another intervention for you? All right, all right. And flexually, he used it against you go. Like, oh really? You need another intervention for you? All right, all right. It's like she'll use it against you forever. Yeah, exactly. So now we go over to Durinda's old apartment and there's this like crazy old mechanical scarecrow

from like leftover from Halloween. That's just in there. Just Durinda and the scarecrow. And I feel like this explains so much about Durinda. Like this is why she has never been able to really bring John into her life because she secretly had this scarecrow in her apartment all the time. And Durinda is just walking around doing what Durinda does, talking to herself me. But with this, I got him in the first place. He's doing the job, guy. I'm like, come on over here. You wanna scare him? You wanna scare him?

You scared him? Yeah. Yeah. So Hannah comes over and she's like, Mom, it's snowing like crazy outside. Make it stop, Mom. This is like crazy, Mom. What is this?

What is this scarecrow? Why are you always buying Halloween things? You're just like well, you know, the Halloween store I had then 70% off so I grabbed them for next year That's like of course like I can imagine doing things like grabbing like a little pumpkin thing or whatever But a full on like scarecrow that has like runs on batteries and is like eyes that light up That's like you know full, you know 510 That's like a real investment in next year Yeah, so Durinda and Hannah talk about how they were living in this apartment because it was really sad because it was right after Richard died

And they moved back into this one to grieve and It's just so sad. Oh my god. It was it is it was really sad Although I thought that like um Durinda's youth feminism was kind of funny because she's like, where you know we move back in the year not because we want to but we had to because we should die and you know when you're more now you know when you're like in morning you know you do a lot of things you shouldn't be doing like a lot of drinking and a lot of this and we did a lot of grieving. It's like okay. I know what that means. Yeah and I'm like you guys get out of there. I'm glad you're moving. Yeah, I'm glad I'm even watching scenes now in this apartment.

It is a depressing apartment. And actually seeing it with all the furniture in it, I was like, yeah, it was time for a change, for sure. Yeah. So then Ramona is at the fundraiser now. And they put up Brydie again, just so we all know that her name is Brydie. Yeah. And Ramona is like, well, I'm not going to be a fan of this anymore.

I'm going to be a fan of this. I'm going to be a fan of this. I'm going to be a fan of this. I'm going to be a fan of this. I'm going to be a fan of this. Yeah, so then Ramona is at the fundraiser now and they put up Brydie again Just so we all know that her name is Brydie. Yeah, and Ramona's like, well, I'm just you know, whoa look at me Hold on hold on birdie this up. There's someone here who's gorgeous and amazing. Let me look at it for a second It's Ramona. She's staring in the mirror herself. She's like, God, I look hot Well, you know, this is crazy having a charity because I did it all by myself, right? I didn't even meet anyone's help. I did the gas list, I did the breast spa,

I did the food, I did the cheese, I did the, you know, I even abused a few people just so I'd have people here, okay? Well, I feel like I'm having a baby. I'm a little nervous. I mean, not like Tiny will understand that is like She walks around just trying to cement the fact that she did everything for this which I really don't believe I think she called the restaurant was like having some people come over there, okay? Yeah

Exactly and then meanwhile we see Bethany and she's in her she's in her car Albi is driving and she's like okay Albi so you think that we have enough time to go to Ramona's event and the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show or no He's like, I don't know there's a lot of traffic. I don't know if we can do both so just to reiterate you think that that's that I cannot make it to Ramona's Correct you think yeah, I don't know All right, so for the record, television audience, I do want to go to Ramona's, but Albee my driver, who I pay, has a knowledge of the New York City streets in traffic, and based on his scientific measurements, I have to go to Victoria's Secret Fashion Show, and that's the way it is, because that is what Albee said. Albee's like, yeah, like you don't even have enough time to drink water.

How could you be a drunk and that was last week, Abby. That's like flying, Abby. All right, all right. We're under Ramona now. So then Sonia walks into this, uh, this fundraiser. She's like, traips his in and then sees a celery stick and dips it into a ranch. And she's like, oh, she acts like she just had like a caviar on a bulini. Then she sees Durinda.

And Durinda is in this gorgeous dress and she goes, is that a Sonya Morgan? And Durinda started laughing. She's the yes-sonia. She's like, you should copy a Sonya in G-Volvesly. And Sony goes, G-Volvesly! So, Ramona's like, whoa. So I texted Bethany and I wish you a happy birthday with a nice Texas change. And one point, I asked if she could come by for 30 minutes.

So I'm sure she will come by because I'm sure her driver will let her come by because he has a good idea of time and traffic in New York City. Okay. And the round comes over. It's like, hello girls! And Ramona is like, well, we were just talking about how Bethany said she couldn't come. I said you should come for 30 minutes or even 15 minutes and she said, I can't! And you know what?

Doesn't make me mad, makes me sad. The drives with mad, but that's different story. I was hoping it would make me glad, because that also rhymes with man, but that's different story. I was hoping it would make me glad because that also rhymes with Mad, but guess what? It really only makes me sad as I previously stated, okay? I'm been to sad since Angelina left Brad, okay? Well, it can't stop Whoa, and let me tell you something this fundraising. It's not just a fad, okay? Whoa, and let me tell you something this fundraising. It's not just a fear, okay? So then we see Beth and the other red carpet for this Victoria's secret thing she's going to and someone's like oh, Bethany

You should be on the runway. I'm like, oh my god. That is so kind. I'm like seriously. Did you see the lowest draft the same as the Grand Asher? I mean Yeah, is that why I should be on the runway because I was sort of doing angels before Victoria So you go doing angels because I'm kind of like a trend set. I mean, I can't have it. It's just let's just it's my gift It's my gift So then we cut back to the party and Lewand all the girls are just during upset now Well, that's me didn't even say it my party. I mean she could have stayed 10 minutes to say hello to me And somebody's like, oh, I mean, that's a little much. At least she showed up. Like, she wishes you came out and said, I just like devil guy, Vicky.

She was there. You didn't come out of your dressing room. And Sony was like, you know, the best thing that Luanne could do right now is just say, I'm sorry, I didn't come out and see you guys, okay? She needs to be kissing Arby's. We're deepest, too. Yeah. I also like that like so it's

it's literally Luan Durinda Ramona and Sonia and Sonia is right in front of Ramona's face because and you know Ramona didn't go either just like fully close Ramona under the and at this point there's so much like throwing under the bus that it just doesn't even face anyone like it doesn't become a thing Ramona doesn't get mad there's like yeah that's true No, it says she just pisses them off immediately cuz she's invited Harry Dubin Yeah, and louis like oh our favorite person Harry and not even the conic version And suddenly it's like oh really she's gonna leave us to talk to Harry Dubin I don't want to talk to him and she invites him does she want him oh I don't want to make I don't want to talk to Harry Dubin. I mean't want to talk to him and she invites him to she want him. I don't want to make, I don't want to talk to Harry Dubin.

I mean, he's an itch, I can't scratch, but he is a mess. Yeah, Sonia and Ramona are still fighting over this crazy guy. This, this, this like discussing, yeah, nasty, gross, Marmi, skeezy, disgusting. And Ramona's like, whoa, there's only 24 hours in the day. And I really want to meet a nice guy. So how am I going to meet him if I just hang out with girls? I mean, it's not going to happen.

So I double book, okay. It's like, this one time, that's a little girl. I was like, I want to read two books at the same time. I'm going to call it double booking. And then my father's friend, Geraldine Parsmith said, no, you can't read two books because you're too dumb to read even one book. It's this day, you've never read a book, okay?

Sorry, I'm sorry, I don't know how to read. So the wands are like, well, are you all coming up state on that weekend of green? Somebody lives in the roundhouse, all the great, raise your hand. Told you, I'm the great unider. So during this like, can you come up with the elite with death, we're gonna leave it laying, to maybe leave you, sick, but I'm so excited about the place. It's like a bird's nest,

so private, no one can bother me, no one can get to me there, even Ramona. You ever see a beautiful, wonderful bird who can sing cabaret. Well, it's a nest for that sort of bird And during this like so like this one like to see it your house that we can't fly over the rooms Check what I don't even have rooms do birds have to rooms on the nest? No, they have little chickies Just waiting to be fed. Oh, by the way, I'm not feeding you either Listen as the old song goes fish got to swim birds got to fly I got to keep you bitches out of my roundhouse can't help being a singing star well you guys can feel free to help me and Bethany celebrate our birthdays because I'm not

gonna be able to get there to free because I'm having a birthday party. Feel free then. gonna be able to get that to re because I'm having a birthday party. Feel free to. You're accordingly invited to throw me a party. Yeah, my friends are taking me out. Oh, yeah. What do you think about that? And then I was like, Oh, okay, are we invited? She goes, No.

This is not I see. You see, we're not invited. We're excluded again. And we were like, I'm sorry, but my friend, we're not invited, we're excluded again. And we're most like, I'm sorry, but my friend, Lucia, is putting this together and she just didn't have space and could only invite her friends. And then we see a flashback to this amazing

like thing that happened at Chipprianne is, and we see this woman, Lucia, and she's talking to Ramona about this party and she's like, oh, I wanna add Sonyaa if there's space and Ramona just shakes her head She's like no no Sonya no okay. Are you sure because I would love to add Sonya? No, okay? You're saying no no What about the rest of your friends who are on that TV show there's no no okay because I specifically have Six extra spaces and the seats are perfectly molded to their butts it would be perfect for them. No, okay

Ramona is the worst So yeah, well, you know, well, I love birthday parties. I can never have enough. Okay, just throw me a party and turn it Like what do we do that. And then suddenly, because I can't believe Mona Singer has the balls to tell us we're not invited. She goes, hey, you don't invite your two friends? Who are you really good friends? Let's bullshit, Mona. So now we're having all of this fight leading up to this big speech that's coming up.

Yeah, so everybody's pissed off for her, Mona. And then, to her, and to go, and what about this Glucia? Doesn't she have the sense to survive that? Which poor Luchia did, you know. Yeah. And Luchia probably got a voicemail from Durrinda like eating her out. Yeah. Sorry. What a, that's not what that was the Sonya. No, no, no, not eating her out. No, you meant like chewing her out. Chewing her out. Yeah. Which somehow sounds worse but it's actually better to say. Yeah, Sonia has totally taken over my brain this week. So yeah, now they're all furious that they're not invited because they want to be invited to everything. When you know, it's probably going to be like a terrible function. I feel like we've seen some of Ramona's

lunchens and they're just like these very dry Boronga pharaohs where her best friend Marion Beanstalks, they're looking like, you know, the lady from my synagogue. And they just all talk. And by the way, she was here at this event. She got a full-on close-up shot. I think she still has not set a line ever in real househouse in New York. Maybe she said one. But she's always reliable for a cameo appearance. Yeah. And then Ramona tells us, I have nothing to do with the list, okay? They were the ones who invited people, not me, okay? And then they showed the clip again of Lucia.

I mean, these editors, like, just to reiterate. Yeah. This poor woman, her big debut on Bravo, and she's getting thrown right into this ridiculous controversy. And then Lucia's like, well, let's just go look at the auction, so they kind of walk off. And Sonya is with Tyrinta, and she goes, goes what is this Ramona she's doing the social climbing thing again as if none of them do that by the way yeah it's just funny that Sony is on her for

that this entire episode it's like she's social climbing she's social climbing that's all she does is social climb says Miss Morgan so so Ramona is now going to the silent auction she's standing with Harry and she's like, whoa Look at the Wands fake necklace. It's gorgeous for someone who doesn't have any taste And he's like, yeah, you want me to buy? He's basically saying something like Which we're real, but I'm just like, well you should buy it for me. He's like, well, I don't think it's real I'll take it until you buy me the real one

And he's like, yeah yeah those boobs can withstand that thing Yeah, Rose he looks like some you know I've his at my papa in the retirement home What and he looks like he has that look in his face and it's not just his ages that confused kind of Cloudy-eyed look in his face like he's just grabbing nurse He would grab like a roll on a plate the same as he would grab a nurses, but he doesn't know where he is. He's just robotically grabbing things and being disgusting.

Yeah. And you can tell he's always been disgusting. You know he was such a slimeball in the 80s, probably working on Wall Street doing Coke in the back of Sardis or something. And just like, you know, the white collar and the blue shirt and just like, just the biggest pig you can imagine. And he was smarmy then and he's smarmy now. This is not a case of someone who once had game

and now is still living in the past. No, he is being consistently disgusting and smarmy for 30, 40 years. We know it. Yeah, he's nasty. So Luan comes up, but first she passes Ramona's age list. Her age list section of the silent auction, which is so funny. Ramona's like, who's gonna auction off some age list by Ramona? Okay.

This was millions of dollars, right? Luan goes, okay, here it is. Oh, look at this. So who puts something from CVS into this auction? Oh it's your age list. Oh okay. Why is the lady on the cover aging? Why should I ever buy some skin care from this old shrew on the cover of the packaging? Oh that's your Ramona apologies.

Hello Harry. He's like, oh, where are you these days, new ads? I'm like, upstate, quiet chill, relaxing, no one named Harry, no one named Romona. Roundhouse. Round, round. So, yeah, so he's like, she clearly is not interested in having a conversation with him and she's just Like it's very apparent that she is just barely humoring him. She's just absolutely disgusted by him Yeah, and he's like, yeah, it sounds like that's quite chill and relaxing So, oh, well, I didn't know you were an item these days He's like, I didn't say that because well, you said we and you bought a reneclus. Oh, He's like, I didn't say that because well you said we and you bought a reneclus. Oh,

Memories Harry memory a beautiful necklace. I might add that every woman in America should have Hello, am I right? And she tells us if they're really an item all gag. I mean, that's gagable Even if they're not an item all gag so So let's well, I have to go and'm gonna be going to see a handsome eligible bachelor who might just be my next husband. His name is Elton John. Anyway, I'll see you all later. Bye, girls.

So Barbara comes over saying, ah, how's everybody doing today? Sherman is like, okay. Okay. And I was like, whoa, look, you without a belly button. This is amazing. Congratulations to me, right? Can't believe you're not wearing a wrap dress. Is it are you feeling okay? Do you have a fever? So Ramona's like okay, we're gonna do a little speech Sunday cuz oh a singer's speech

host committee only please So these ladies all come up there. There's like six of them. And they're posing like the paparazzi are taking their pictures at like the Kentucky Derby. I don't know what these ladies think that they're about to do, but they're all like turning and posing. They're all um they're and they're all like flanking um they're all flanking varieties. so Ramona in an effort to show that she can learn some of his name. She goes, Britty, Britty, come up here, Britty. She's like, Britty, Brite. And Dorena is like, Brite. She was like, OK, Brite, Brite, Brite.

OK, I loved your movie. What a beautiful movie you had last year. She goes, OK, everybody, thank you for coming. I don't want to cry, but, and then Sonia starts laughing, she's like, don't laugh, Sonia! Hey, why are you laughing at me? It's just, you're not gonna cry. Everyone knows you cry on a dime or more, and I'm just, that's not even true, Sonia. Oh my god.

Yeah, they're like literally bickering as they're trying to, you know, transition to a as they're trying to you know Transition to a very serious speech about you know like sexual You know Thank you Yeah, it's like a very sensitive thing to be talking about and they're right you cry so easy What are you talking about? Oh Christ? Stop seeing that you're a slut you're a slut bad lover because you're a stud that cries I don't cry run on it don't cry Sonia whoa this is crazy just stop and just try and talk about birdie right now what are you doing this to

me Sonia why and different because I know you know you're just install over I don't like you doing this okay Okay. Oh, I'm so sorry, Brydie. Oh, your name is Brydie by the way, right? Did you hear that Ramona? Yes, my name is ready. Got it. Okay, Britney Spears has something to say So Ramona's like Ramona's like hello people marine beanstalk We are raising money for this charity and wreck a recognition and render's like and say the most important part say it say the most important part come on get it in Boyen by whoa hold on one second say the board but hold on going to get friends with the family of friends with the family Just like interjecting crazy. Yeah, I want the whole story when you sexually assault it You're afraid to come forward a friend of the family, right?

Here I'll be remodeled you be Diorinda Whoa, I'll be remodeled you be Diorinda. Okay, I Just what you raise is a very important thing that happens to the family Let me finish I I know what's in the family. What I'm trying to say is that that burgdaw over there. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it.

Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it I mean not the horse the horse is I mean this is a charity Function about sexual abuse and there is a survivor about to talk at these women On like the biggest side show it is hilarious so then Brydie

It was like so well. I told my story five years ago and you know no one knew and Until people are okay to come forward That a finish Never mind is like let a finish just let a fish red that's it's that mind of doing me Shop money. Yes, that's it. Yes, that's it. Stop. But I was just like, okay, can I get back to you?

So, you know, for many years, this happens as a, yeah, it's important. It's important. It's important, you see? See, see, it's important. It says it's true, the next day he confessed. And then Drew, and it goes, you see, it was important. It was important.

It was important. And then Ramona just looks straight into the camera like you fucking kidding me Dirk's don't ever do that to me again. Don't you ever do that to me again? Don't interrupt me and Brydie's still trying to give this like heartfelt speech They're like fighting over to the side and then Ramona tells us I can't believe that doing this to me I brought a hundred and twenty one of my friends and they're embarrassing me. It's like ludicrous And then afterwards to run to rindes the one who calls Ramona a bitch He was not leaving me oh My god so ridiculous

Oh my God, so ridiculous. So embarrassing. I don't think anybody can even do this justice because it was just so painful to watch. And then then walking off thinking nothing was even wrong. So can you believe she's still calling the girl birdie? I think that's the biggest offense that happened here. And then Ramona goes over to complain to Brydie, who they've just humiliated, you know.

And Brydie's like, oh, I guess thanks. And Ramona's like, whoa, hello, I raised the money, I got the party. When you, you're supposed to swap when it's your turn of A. It was such a clusterfuck. It was amazing. It's amazing that this show can have these moments. It was so real housewives of New York City. Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey!

Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey!

Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey!

Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! crazy episode. So tune in for that and of course go to watchcrapins.com to get your merchandise like... Round the L.A. and straight to the R.A. and then more importantly, not more importantly, equally as important. Take us to our live shows. We're going to be in Irvine next week. So come see us there. Not a lot of take us left for Irvine. So you have about five or six days to make up your mind. If you want to come see us, it's going to be a great time. So we'll see you there.

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