Watch What Crappens - RHONY Part Two: Coach Reproach

Episode Date: September 5, 2023

*Also avail as video on Crappens On Demand http://bit.ly/crappensvideo* This is part two of a two prat recap! It's vacation time for the Real Housewives of New York, and Erin starts it off on a whiny tattle tale note when she complains to everyone that Jenna ditched them cuz she's too good for coach. Sad horn Erin strikes again! Have fun! This week's bonus episode will be a Trailer Trash Southern Charm Preview. Get all our video recaps and bonuses at patreon.com/watchwhatcrappensSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Amazon 5 Star Reviews presents Better Than A Wooden Steak Today's customer review is from a customer that goes by Burt Toast, they write. Ever since this three pack of organic garlic was delivered, I have not seen a single vampire. That cannot be a coincidence. Will update my review of anything changes? Five stars.

Well, Burt Toast, if it doesn't work, at least you get the beginnings of a nice marinerah. That's how to make everyday better. Real Amazon customers' real reviews, really. Hello, everybody. This is part two of a two-part Real Housewives of New York Recap already in progress. If you missed the first part, go back and catch it. Okay, it's there!

We love you guys. Thanks for being here Uba now everyone's packing Uba's packing andessell's packing and Povitz watching her, and he's like, well, this is like a whole watermelon thing you've got going on, she goes, well yes, I'm going to Engrillo. You know what Engrillo is? It's a place where they serve fried chicken,

so I thought you might know about it. Stupid fried chicken society of America. Anyway, it's in the Caribbean. And she's like, should I take that lingerie that Jenna gave to me? I'm going to take it. I've lost some weight. Actually, I might not look like a Christmas tree in it anymore. I don't know why I was mad about this. It's actually kind of cute, Puppet. Why are you eating the lingerie, Puppet? He's like, it's an abon me-bon. Just trying it. I don't have your mouth. So Jenna is now, she's meanwhile Jenna's checking in to the Sky Club at JFK, like the

business class club. And she's like, I just want to be able to put on a sun dress. I just want to have a little glow. I don't want to be the one that's wearing a berk at the beach. Why am I even explaining myself? It's fine. Who cares? I'm old and six feet tall, whatever. I love that I'm old and six feet tall, whatever. She's a capper in this. So Aaron is like, hey, should I bring this? Like, does this sound fun? Like, I'm going to Anguela.

Should I bring this thing? I got an Italy aim. And their kids, like, da, da, da, da, these playing with the kids. And the biggest shock in this scene, I don't know if they just brought these kids out of some holding chamber, but they're not in parkas.

So, I don't know what's going on. I've never seen anybody be this warm in Aaron's freezing home. No. So then the kid beats on the floor. And Aaron's like, wow, he's like a dog. And he was like, yeah, let's put him in a crate because you want to go in a crate. You want to go in a crate, child?

Okay, get the pants from him and put him in the crate. I'm going down to Angula. This is so funny to me because everybody was worried that since the old New York is over, that we have to stop watching people like, you know, go to the bathroom on the ground. Don't worry guys, it's continuing on with this show. Okay.

So it's not Ramona Singer. But hey, baby sets. Yes. Yeah, literal baby sets. So, Jessel is now trying on something. She's just cute, right? You like this book? I don't even know why I'm asking you, Povit. You think a piece of pork rind is cute. And Povit's like, well, I don't even know what that even is. What are you wearing? It's a top of Povit. It's a top! It looks like a funnel cake, which I'm

vibing to get a license for in your Madison Square Garden. So... Could you mind off of street food for one second? More on, I'm packing. All right? So what is this, by the way, about you going to Vietnam? Vietnam? You're serious. Why would you tell my parents that? And he's like, it shows the clip of him telling the mom, I'm going to Vietnam. I'm going to cut this back. It's like, wow, glad they got that clip in there. Yeah.

She's like, excuse me, you're going to Vietnam? I'm going to Vietnam. I've got to go to Vietnam. So he's going to be going in about like a month and a half because I have this ticket I need to use. So I'm going to go to Vietnam. But why? Why are you going to Vietnam?

Because there's some bond-bees sandwich that you must eat for your chicken society of New York City? He's like, um, I'm going because there's a Bond me sandwich that I must eat in that promise my friends in the street food society that I have to eat it. It's just, there's literally Bond me everywhere here, Povett. I can get you a hotel room here if you need to me time. You can get a bond me. There's actually me in the bond me. It's like double me time, Povit.

Like how many me's do you need in your sandwich, Povit? So later, I think he's accused of sex tourism. I think that's what's coming down. Oh, really? Yeah, I think the other ladies, I read somewhere that like an upcoming storm story behind is that he's being accused of Sex tourism now first of all, I think that's racist try. I don't think you should say that Second of all is that a sex destination Vietnam like a sex tourism destination

I think any place could be a sex destination to be honest Well, I had a friend who's like, I'm going to Australia, yeah, I want to do some sex tourism. I'm going to go to my pet farm. I'm in a dealer's dressing room, so I guess going to dealer's or sex tourism. I mean, Scottsdale, Arizona, that could be a sex tourism.

It could, I just saw, I was like, oh, when I heard that, I was like, oh, it made me watch this scene very differently. You know, I was like, oh, I'm on the high floor. I'm sorry, I just made it gross for everybody else. Well, by the way, sex tourism, I could be very wrong on this. My impression is that sex rarming is just like,

you're going someplace to have sex with people. I don't know if it necessarily means you are like hiring prostitutes and escorts, but I think it's assumed, but I don't know if they were age or what. Because like, my friend was not doing that. My friend just wanted to go to Australia and have sex with hot Australian men. That was his plan.

Right, but I think there are certain places where like, it's like a sex considered a sex tourism place where it's like underage stuff, which is really like, that's what puts the darkness on it. So everybody just wanted you to know. I read about it. I'm not really sure how to tackle it on this podcast, which is a copy podcast,

but just I did hear that that was coming up and it just is making me cringe at this whole scene. So I'm gonna go ahead and erase that from my brain and pretend that the man just really wants a bond bee sandwich so badly that he's gonna fly 18 hours to get one and then fly right back, because that is fucking weird too. But people do that, people do do that shit.

Because I mean, why do you think people went into ocean gate to look at the Titanic to say, yeah, I went, I spent all this money and I went down underwater to look at the Titanic for five minutes, just that way you can go to a cocktail party and say, I did it. So people will 100% say, yeah, one time I flew all the way to Vietnam to try this on me

and I flew back. They do it for the cocktail party story. So I don't think it's that crazy. I don't think it's, I don't think it's smart or wise. And I by the way, I actually do that. Obviously, I mean, hindsight's 2020, and she is, Baron, God. We get bands stupid,

shaming the people who died in the Titanic. I was talking more about flying to bon mi, but you know what though, like if we hear stories that that Bond me imploded on itself, then I'll be like, well, Povit, you should have known better. You've just gotten in New York City. He's like, I ate the Bond me and it imploded my stomach.

Well, that's what you get. I hope you enjoyed your 18 hour flight back in the bathroom. Yeah, that's what you get by eating a square Bond me. Why are you trying to change the shape of what already works? So I just wrote, get some cameras on his ass immediately, girl. Okay. Just put some cameras. Yeah, I just, I heard that I was grossed out.

I wanted to talk to you because I figured you could educate me. Turns out we're both uneducated, so there's where you go. Well, I'm gonna, we'll wait and see if that storyline actually emerges, I guess. Yeah. So, Jussles, like, are you fucking with me? You're smiling kind of. You're slack-jol'd and staring at a wall, and I can't really tell what that means. He's like, what do you mean? He's like so slack-jol'd staring at a wall. I think that's Povid's coping mechanism in this marriage. Whenever they cut the Povid,

he's literally slacked on and staring at a wall. So he's like, well, you're going to Anguela for five days, and I'm going to Vietnam for three days. What's the difference? I mean, Fudge College, honestly. And she's like, Sweet days, you're going for absolutely no reason, Povid. I'll tell you what the difference is, I'm going to an guilla with people who are more famous than me, who could maybe help me rub shoulders with Tom Cruise and you're going

for a sandwich across the world. Stupid, here's some home bride holy bread and some peanut butter and jelly go fuck yourself. He's like, what are you going for? It's just to spend time with famous people. You're going to spend time with the sandwich. The sandwich is not really even that famous. What clothing lines has your sandwich pioneered? I'd like to, what, what first ladies has your sandwich dressed?

I'd like to know that. Has Michelle Obama ever rubbed shoulders with a barn me? Ha, ha, ha. Last time I checked Rockefeller Center Has Michelle Obama ever rubbed shoulders with the Bond me? Has she? Last time I checked, Rockefeller Center was not being revamped by something from Quizness. Beyoncé has never written a song about a Bond me. All right, can we put more us in the Bond me, Puppet? To the left, to the left, all the bombies in a box to the left. It's not a lyric, Bobbitt.

Oh, so jassal's like, so how long does it take to go to Vietnam anyway, 20 hours? I mean, that dodo bird is going to spend more time flying to the country than he's spending in the country. And he's like, some people hate flying. I love flying. To me, Flying is a vacation in itself. Really being on any mode of transportation without you being in it is a vacation to me. So I'm happy. So she's, well, I think that this is his escape from me nagging in his ear and our crazy twins and me trying to get a socially inept child into a Montessori school.

I know that is like me trying to put logic on things that I just don't understand, you know, like why would someone fly to be, because I'm with her, I'm like, why the fuck would you do that? None of this makes sense. But then I remember those twins running around all the open-colored furniture. I'm like, you know what? I'll fuck it. He could sign up to be a steward. That's how much I want to fly now. I want to always be on a plane now. He could either be at home refilling the Oreo jar

chasing after wild banshees and filling out applications for monetary schools or he could just be on a plane watching a movie about a dog dying and flying it, just literally being anywhere. Not everyone's watching your movies. Okay, stop trying to make Coco happen on flights. What was the name of that?

What was that the art of speeding the art of driving? You only watched things that make you cry on the phone. I don't, no, no, I don't watch any of these fucking movies. You watch everyone turns on the fucking, the art of driving in the rain or whatever that movie was with the dog, the race car driver with the dog, and a man to see freed, and they all watch it. I don't know what they're expecting because they're all crying by the end of it. I was like, it's a dog movie. They don't make dog movies where the dogs don't die.

I hate to tell you this. I've never even seen Marley and me, but I can tell you, they might as well call it dead Marley and me because I know that dog's going to die by the end of that movie. Am I right? Am I right? What's your next fly 18 hour? Do they even have an 18 hour movie called Marley and Bond Me? Do they? What?

What's your ridiculous and your absurd? So then we go to the airport camera, psychosur first, and and Uba is stretching outside, whackling, crazily. And Brands, I've been looking forward to this trip. I'm so long. I can't wait to try and get a Brin's good side. And they're all, by the way, definitely not in the Delta Airlines fancy sky club. They're just standing in front, the walking passageway. They're like children.

They're like a bizarre where people are selling chachkis. They're like camels walking by, you know? They're outside the Christian takemann pop of color vending machine, which I actually did. They're like an obon pan. Did you? The pop of color? Yeah, a while ago. So you had like a pop of color vending machine

The party airport. I mean it was here is for her. Oh, yeah Speaking of now Josh, I would definitely not trust to go anywhere Anywhere on a plane with him. He was already found out Ashley Madison So he's got like sex he's got he doesn't even do sex tourism. He just does like visit local. He's like sex. She's sex vacation. Yeah. Yeah. He does a sex vacation. So, um, so Jenna's, now we go angola. Jenna's by the beach. She's in her bathing suit. She's just enjoying life. She's in some very wealth. I guess we find out she's at the four seasons, but she's, um, she's living in the life of luxury.

And then we go back to the other women and Aaron's like, I'm on vacation, I'm not going to harp on the small stuff or rather, I'm not going to harp on the same small stuff, I'm going to harp on new small stuff. So let's resolve the old small stuff. So basically, she's like, I'm fine with brining, brne again. She just decides she's okay with it. Yeah, well, you're not going to win with Brin. So you're just going to try and turn everybody against somebody else, you know, because everybody hates you right now. So let's see how she does it.

I have no idea how she's going to deal it. So then on day, go to the fly, then they're driving from the airport. They're all news. So there's a lot of misplaced wooing about things. That's like a misplaced wooing. Yeah, it's like we're getting from the airport, they're all news, so there's a lot of misplaced wooing about things. Since the cold is blest wooing. Yeah, it's like we're getting from the freeway, we're taking an exit off the freeway. Woo, woo, woo.

Woo. So then they get to the villa and Uba and Jess looking to share room. And Si's telling us, there's no way I'm sharing a room, okay? I'm actually quite shocked that Uba agreed to share room with Jess, but you know what? I'll take it. I'm like, okay, well thanks for that.

Thanks for, thanks producers for stopping the entire show to hear that Si is okay with them sharing my really glad for that interview segment right there. This place is amazing. They get a big mansion on the beach and size-fueling richy-betch. And so Aaron's like, wow, really good job, Si. This place is really great. I hope no one suggests that my husband's sleep with them on this trip. And then we meet Patricia, concierge to see Vila. She's like, hi, welcome to see Vila,

you bunch of tramps. It's poor concierge. She gets three words in before they all scrambles, scramble for rooms. And so, of course, it's like, we need to do so many photos, ASAP. And you know, this got me thinking, I had such a really good point about this last night. I was, this is a, this was a Ben in bed moment where I was like, I'm gonna bring this up on the podcast because this is a really good point that I'm gonna make. And now I don't remember all the pieces of it, but I think you can help me get to my point because

I think you'll understand what I'm getting towards. So, Si is complaining so much about how these gifts are not like from the heart and they're all these branded collaborations, yada, yada, yada, nothing is since, you know what, never mind, I can't get to my point. I thought I, I thought I could get there. I was excited to go down the trail, look, I open up. Well, okay, the trail, okay, the trail was something along the lines of like, she's complaining

about lack of sincerity when, no, I can't get there, I can't figure it, there was something about the photos, doing photos and other people's trips that bothered me. Like, you know, it's hilarious to me because she's constantly taking photos of herself and promoting everything. It's like, okay, you know, that wasn't personal enough

to you, the collab stuff, but posing next to a stairwell in a free place in Anglican was like, it's like, that's for time, you know. That's what it was. She was so angry at the self-promotion when literally, she packed eight bags to go to Aaron's house because she wanted to use that trip to for self promotion to do all these different looks and photos and she stops on the street to take photos, which is her self

promotion. So it felt like a really strong point last night in bed and like maybe not strong today, but it felt good to get it out anyway. Well, complaining about self-promotion when you're a science, like a baby con, the toddler poopy, okay? It just doesn't make sense coming from you. So, just like this filler is stunning,

it honestly looks like it belongs in Greece, which is what I would have starred in I'd like to think if I was from a different time period, me and Olivia Newton John would have been like this Our kids were in preschool together. We would have rubbed shoulders together. It would have been wonderful So they're all looking for rooms. I also for the record. I also would have rubbed shoulders with a zucin here if I was an original grease For the record, I also would have wrapped shoulders with the Z-Syn here if I was an original grease. So not madusa though, that hair is just incorrigible. Talk about the cackling hag. They give Jenna the city a strideum of course.

And brands like, I'm sorry Jenna, you don't get rewarded for going early. You get the shitty room. I think she'll be fine. Her entire apartment is like her entire closet's bigger than your entire apartment. Like I think she'll be okay. I love poor people thinking they're getting one over on somebody, having to stay in a city room. She's like, I'm spending time with all of you.

No matter where I am, it's gonna be the city room. And it just came from the four seasons and Guilla, you idiots. And it's like, by the way, also perfectly fine room. So another woman are sitting by the pool and who was like, I would come here with a donkey and bring girls, I don't get it. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.

Finally, someone says it. And then Aaron goes, oh, by the way, because I don't think we even get clarification on what it means. But Aaron goes, it goes, by the way, I think she just met like, wow, this place is so beautiful. I could be here with anybody. Like, I'd even bring a donkey here to hang out with. I took it. Hold on, guys.

So like, do we know when Jenna's getting here? Cause I would like to know because I don't want her to hear me saying anything, but I went to her house and she like had that dental surgery, you know, cause she's like a freak of nature. So I made her a soup. Yeah, cause I'm like a good friend. Look, as evidenced by this entire monologue. So I came over with my good friend, Soup, and we started talking about the trip, and she told me she was flying down two days early to 10 because of her genetic disorder,

and she feels uncomfortable, I'll wait for it. And then she was like, the truth is, I'm not flying down with you guys, because I don't fly, coach. Yeah, she said that. Which, by the way, that's a lie. She didn't say, I don't fly coach.

She said, I don't want to fly coach. Yeah, she said that. Which by the way, that's a lie. She didn't say I don't fly coach. She said I don't want to fly coach. And psychos. Oh, shut up, sigh. Shut up. You all said you when you heard you have to fly coach fair. Yeah, for a TV show. It's time for commercial. It's time for a crap and commercial. Hey, listeners, you need to know that Wondery's shocking true crime podcast over my dead body is back for a fourth season, Gone Hunting. This newest season covers the story of Mike Williams. It was Mike's sixth wedding anniversary when he set off on a hunting trip into the gator-infested swamps of North Florida.

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with lots of surprises along the way. Enjoy the big flop on the Wonder App or wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen to the big flop early and add free on Wonder E+. Get started with your free trial at Wandery.com slash plus. Also, Aaron is such an asshole. You know, I say this every five minutes, but Aaron is such a fucking asshole on this show. Who does that? Who goes to somebody sick bed? They've just had major surgery. They're probably on drugs.

And did you take what they say and use it against them the first second you get? You're all horrible human being. You had one person being nice to you on this show and you just shot all over their fucking chest. Well, also, like you framed the story with this whole thing of like, I went over to bring her soup because she just had surgery. So you're framing it, like, look at what a good friend I am.

Now look at what a friend, what sort of friend I am because I'm gonna throw her under the bus big time over something stupid. So Aaron's like, I don't know. Awesome. No one wants your fucking stupid pumpkin. See, was it better not to squash? It is better not squash.

Okay, that's exactly different. I thought pumpkin, I was like, fucking your pumpkin fucking. Was it better not to? It's better not to squash. Okay, that's a good, slightly different. I thought pumpkin, I was like, fucking your pumpkin fucking shit. It's good though. Better not to go. It's good. It's good. I changed my mind.

You're a good person for that. So Aaron's like, I don't feel bad for telling them. She didn't say don't tell anyone. She just doesn't know how to be in a group of girls. And to be open and honest, college nerds, she would do so much better if she'd just say, hey, I'm not flying coach with you bitches. I'm like, she doesn't know how to be an in group of girls. So you're going to show her why she might not want to be in group of

girls. Maybe I mean, what's the, how is this? When she said open and honest, I was officially done. I've been done, but with Aaron, I was like, that's it. You're using Kyle Richards, where's your fucking hypocrite Fedora? Where's your hypocrite Fedora? That's what you should be wearing right now, okay? But also, if you know she doesn't know how to be any group of girls and you're pretending to be

a good friend to her, why aren't you saying, hey, if I were you, I would text everyone and just be, and say that's to be open, otherwise people are gonna feel some sort of way. But instead, she just lets her fall into her own trap and in fact she pushes her she doesn't even fall in She she actually creates the trap and pushes her into it instead of and acting like oh well She just doesn't know how to be with the group of girls, but also she was totally honest with you She yeah That's an honest in every single one of you she had someone in there filming her gnarly ass.

It looked like a horror movie, her dental surgery. I mean, it was rough what she went through on camera, okay? And then she talked about her disorder. And then she admitted that she, she heard genetic disorder. Then she talked about getting bullied. Then she talked about how she hates codes. She told you all of this stuff.

It was perfectly honest with you about it. What are you talking about and saying she doesn't know, she has a problem with being honest. You know, my God. And then using someone's sick bed information. Shame on you. So, Aaron's like, she flew first. It's like, she's like, it's faster and it has no lines. Also, she didn't say that. And it's like, oh, that's embarrassing. Well, she's like taking a picture of herself, she's like, this is the moment I found out that Jenna was full of shit in a fendee scoth. So Brynn says, it's a girl strip, like part of traveling together, and it's part of it is like traveling together and staying together. And I feel like sometimes Jenna just doesn't have the

one-on-ones on the girlfriend a handbook. I think this boils down to exactly what you said before, which is that they feel like Jenna gets to have different rules with filming and has nothing to do with girl ship or whatever. And again, like don't say this whole thing, it doesn't have the 101 of being the girlfriend handbook. If you guys are unwilling to help her, like you, like you, she already did share that she doesn't really understand these things. And so- And so, girlfriend's handbook,

brin, you were just jokingly flirting at your friend's engagement party last week after walking with your sunglasses, dissing how shitty the party was the entire time. And I said, after that, by the way. I do too. But after when it started with the first episode, with you saying you didn't go out and you went home,

but instead you went to another place and put everything on social media, rubbing everyone's faces. And then everyone's ever told you this whole season, you go use it against them, you've turned against everyone. No, I don't know, nobody on this show needs to listen to Brynn about how to be a good girlfriend. Anyway, well, Brin has not an issue with Jenna even one single fucking time.

Okay, you're mad that somebody's richer than you. Okay, and you've been some weird mommy issue that you're taking out on Jenna. Keep it in your, keep it in your purse girl. Nobody needs it out on the big gay. Jen. Brin has been, she definitely has had a bone to pick with Jenna all season long. She definitely has an issue with. I think the fact that she feels like Jenna gets special privileges.

I think there's probably a jealousy issue there. Yada, yada, yada. And you're right. You're right that, like, the fight that started off the season was about Jenna and not Jenna. Bren and Sai being dishonest about their plans and doing something behind everyone else's backs. Brin and Sy being dishonest about their plans and doing something behind everyone else's backs and hear They're mad when they did the same thing so it's you know their manager for what they believe is deception But I guess maybe they're mad at the double standard that Jenna can do it, but they get they get

You know burned out across trying they're just trying too hard It's just another episode where they're gonna try and make something huge out of something insignificant little. It's been every episode, I think it's a housewives hallmark in a way and people are like, I live for this petty drama. No, it's just made up bullshit throwing it a wall. This is like Gen Shaw style where it's like, you don't have anything, so you're just gonna try yelling about nothing.

You know what I'm doing? Yeah. Also, I sense a little Erica versus Vander pump stuff here where Erica just obviously has mommy issues that she's going to take out on the older person in the group. I don't think their personalities are somewhere at all. I just see that same kind of thing happening here where you're like, well, why is Erica so mad at Vander pump? And then we find out that she never got along with her mom. And she'd always had these issues and blah, blah, blah. So just planning that seed for maybe a later, maybe it'll be correct later. And I can say, remember when I said it? Okay. So then Aaron's like, I wonder if she really even wanted to tan. Oh wow. So you're

gonna go even lower. What do you think she's lying about her fucking genetic disorder now? Did she all just make that up for you during better nut squash soup day? To really stick it to you guys. Better nut squash soup day. So, so I was like, yeah, she told me she doesn't even tan. She doesn't she's going to wear a Birk on the beach and so I tell us, I'm confused. I just need you to be open and honest. I was like, oh, here's another one. They're falling like falling like Since he falling like flies. That's not a thing. So what I fly is dropping like flies That's what it is. So Jess will tell us that's maybe the tending is part of a plan

But I think the real reason is because she doesn't want to fly a coach I'm like wait a get with the program. Jessal. I think that was literally Literally stated in like, and we see and we see the text she goes, I mean, I was just like, beach? No, just no. I'll swim in a wetsuit and the rest of the time I'll be on a lounge chair in a Berca. Obviously not a joke, guys. I'm glad we're all taking it very, very seriously, okay? Like, why does no one on this casket a fucking joke? Like, bring Lee Savander on bond for two seconds to traumatize every single last one of you.

And say, I wanna hear one British humor to watch you fucking cry for 12 more episodes. You have a bunch of whims. So, just so, uh, says her thing, and Brynn's like, I don't know, but you know what, I'm over it. Uh-huh. I know, isn't that hard sitting in your mansion

on the beach in Anguilla, in the beautiful weather, educator event? I'm so sorry guys, this is right. Yeah. So now it's time for food and there's a big spread in the kitchen. So of course, side times in is like,

she's like, I would never let Aaron play in this trip because we all know we'd be shipwrecked and starving. So they're eating. And so now Jenna's gonna come on over. And they're all sitting at the table and Brian is like, there's like part of me, that's worried that I'm gonna be like, well, I do this like every time when I get like this.

Like, I see her and she does like the baby voice. And then I'm like, aw, she has that like effect. She does the baby voice. I'm like, you are literally the queen of baby voice on Bravo. Like, that's how you came into the season and that's what we do every single episode like, oh, you're not so mad at me. She really does. And then we see a clip of Jenna doing her little baby voice. Embrane's like, I mean, I just can't pick on someone. Like, I've been, I find my own weight class when someone acts like that. I just can't pick on someone. I'm like, I've been, I find my own weight class. When someone acts like that, I just can't.

I was like, also, you have no legit reason to be mad at her. So why are you acting like you need to keep up this front so you can stay mad at this? Yeah, that's the thing. I don't understand why everyone's mad. So, Uber joins, sits down, she's like, only at size food, do you get size house, do you get food? Ha, where's Jenna?

And so sorry. It's my favorite thing, I'm so sorry I keep taking it back. I'm not gonna let you progress this. It's okay, I'm not covered, I'm happy to just like not talk that much. I'm in a crazy mood. It's fine. Uber's walking over to them. Uber's got a plate that is literally piled with food, okay?

And Brynn looks at it and she goes, Did she make up plate? food, okay? And Brynn looks at it and she goes, did she make up for it? Come on! Okay, continue. So, who was like, she's like, where's Jenna? And so I go, she had to wait for her first class taxi to come. Like, okay, this, first of all, it's really not a very good burn. Okay, and I say this is someone who botched, I botched my burns all the time, but this is really, you're on TV, you can't be botching your burns like this.

Second of all, are you now gonna play like class warfare with Jenna Lyons when you're out here a Hawking designer like Garmin's that people, most people can't afford, and you're gonna be like, oh, she's waiting for her first class taxi to come. Oh, Shush. So, I can't with her, and literally're gonna be like, oh, she's winning for her first class taxi to come. Oh, Shush. So I can't with her.

And literally your name is Spelldron. I know. So then size, G, H, it's a side word. It's like, finally, I can see the numerology in your name. Did you change the fucking spelling? Cause that's literally all I do when you come on. So someone asked her about her headache

and she's like, sell her it's, and so her friends like, you know what I'm gonna help the headache and the more you guys, I'm, I'm shocked that that's a broom's fucking answer to her headache. You know who else says that? Every fucking guy I've ever known. Jerk it off. All right. So I call my god, that's hilarious.

You can have sex and get rid them, you're a headache. And so I was like, yeah, I make my husband have sex, we would need to get rid of my headache. You know why it does that? Cause it releases into offense, all right? Just walking around with the head pounding all day for fucking nine years, whatever. It's fun, usually you can use a headache

to get out of sex, but so I use the sex to get out of a headache. That's kind of genius. That's what they call that, Montessori thinking. I wonder if her husband has constant bonneme breath. And so I was like, yeah, I'm sure a jessil's been suffering from migraines for over a year. And I was like, oh, she did say it. I was just joking before. Well, of course, she's gonna make a joke about Jessel not getting laid. And here it was, two lines. So now it's the evening, it's 6.15 and they're all wondering where Jenna is.

And Brin's like, I don't care. I knew because Jenna can suck my dick. I'm like, why are you guys are so upset right now? And Brin goes, I wanna go rest for a minute. I'm not gonna sit here and wait for her to come in on her like with guys with like love scene t-shirts carrying her like Cleopatra. I'm sick of it. Everything is a branding opportunity I can't stand it. Do you want to be friends with me or do you want to want me to post shit on Instagram? And this oh this is where I think my point came in from before which is

Them complaining that everything is a branding opportunity when psi is literally Using every trip to take lots of photos for her Instagram. Yeah. And so it's like, well, why don't you, what just stop doing the unboxings then? And Brent's like, I don't see that. And so then let me get to straight. So you guys are saying, none of you are posting about it on Instagram,

yet the gifts keep coming. Could it be that she doesn't care if you post about them on Instagram? Could it be that if you guys actually had actual jobs, you might be able to spread some goodie bags as well. You fucking losers, brin. I'm so sorry, brin. Did you not get any goodie bags to share with people when you were an advisory board member on sacred all caps yoga, or an advisory board member on tongue-try all one word. I just, yeah, I just feel like this is disrespect to a good swag.

So, I know, no one's gonna give anything free to anybody else anymore. You guys are trying to ruin the reputation of free shit, okay? You literally live in the Statue of Liberty with the lady holding her, her fucking arm in the air like fucking advertising free deodorant to people who are on their boats on their way in here for the first time. Don't dis free shit. So, Brynn says, don't give me gifts and then go on social media and tell your hundreds of

thousands of followers that you gave me a gift. So she feels like that Jenna went and bragged that she gave all these gifts, like she's sort of getting credit. So then we see Jenna's story as Jenna's saying this. She goes, so everyone in these are all the things I'm giving this Christmas. It's not an unboxing, it's a boxing. It says, here's a necklace from a jewelry that comes from a collab I did

and here's something else I did and I'm just giving these to my friends. That is not bragging. That's just saying, hey, if people are interested in the sort of things that I think would be good gifts, here's what I'm giving. Maybe you'll be interested in these things too. Yeah, so Aaron's like, yeah, that feels weird.

Like, I didn't see that, but also I didn't have the bag at. So I didn't know whether I should be upset about it, but now that you guys have told me to be upset about it, thank you for adding that to my arsenal of things to be mad about. Hold on, I'm gonna file this right next to Cackling Hacks. So, Brent's like, yeah, it's like a very New York friendship and older person with a lot of money, success,

giving me a lot of gifts. I'm like, I love gifts, but you're not sharing. There's no connection. Okay, so now it's a problem that you can't feel anything from the old men that try to use you for your hotness. While you use them for their money, girl, you are projecting. I've already seen one picture of your giant rock

next to somebody's Porsche symbol, okay? Go cry about your lonely ass life somewhere else. Yeah, you can't put all old people giving you gifts into the same box, and also you're really making yourself sound like a pro over there. Also, like, she's like, that's a very New York relationship. I don't think that's a New York relationship. That's a transactional relationship. That's a matter.

Do you find anywhere? Yeah. That's not a New York thing. And now she's gonna complain too. She complains that like, it's like a girl at the checkout counter complaining that all of her friendships are transactional. You work at the checkout counter. Like, am I supposed to feel sorry for Brin now? It was just a mistake that she happened to be with Gideon, a richer than God guy who hangs out in Rolls Royces stores sadly, hoping that someone will one day understand him. Please. Yeah, I mean, she's essentially saying that it's like someone trying to substitute genuine connection with gifts, which I get. But to be like, this is just what all relationships are like in New York. It's like, you may be overstating that a bit.

That may just be the relationships that you find yourself in because of the damage in your life, which, you know, that's what happens. So Jenna, I think she's dating like a lot of older rich men and then wondering why she's got no real feelings going on. Because you're dating a bunch of old rich men. You're dating. What do you think? Stop projecting that on Tijana.

The woman just gave you some fucking eyelashes for her. I say, I know. Be grateful. Yeah. Exactly. Meanwhile, like, where is this, where is this disdain for Gideon who loved Bomter with 500, slow 500 miles in front of the Waldorf Astoria and an A-J-Ring?

Okay. So I'm so worked up over the stupid. with a slow 500 miles in front of the Waldorf Astoria and an A-J ring. Okay? So I'm so worked up over the stupid stuff. These people are making me crazy. They're just the most ungrateful fucking people I've ever seen. I can't just imagine, I mean, talk about looking at gift horse in the mouth, you know? And this gift horse literally just had mouth surgery.

It makes it 10 times ruder than the same. Yeah. Isn't it punching a gift horse in the mouth or is it looking? When someone gives you a horse as a gift and then you immediately check the team. How good is this horse? It's called looking them in the... For the record, it would also be terrible to punch the horse. You know why I know the meaning of it because I always thought it was licking the gift horse in the That would be a good gift to me. Okay, I mean bring you the horse to fuck don't do things to the gift horse Okay, leave the gift horse alone

The horse tried to give you a free goddamn ride and you're all complaining about it Yeah, you should if anything you should be, I'm sorry to the gift horse, because you think that the gift horse wants to be with you. That horse is like, I want to be with my family. So Jenna's like, so Jenna's like, uh, she's like, I've been in, I've been in an aquilip for two days. I'm tanned. I'm relaxed.

I've had a massage. I'm wearing my new favorite dress. It's time for girls trip. I've got this. So she actually thinks that she's gonna walk into like this happy female bonding moment when she's about to get savage. Or I would even say she's gonna get savage

because this cast doesn't really know how to savage, but they're for sure. They try to, but it just doesn't work on Jedi. Like they're getting to her about, but they're gonna give it a good old fast and try. And so they keep cutting from Jenna, just getting out of the car and walking in happily to them talking about her. So it cuts back. And Brent's like, so I don't know if it's a surgery or the break up, but I wouldn't know. Cause she doesn't tell me about the

break up. She never tells me about anything she's going through. She's so guarded. Cause you've always got your fucking guns pointed at somebody. How can she not be guarded? She's like you're coming for someone in every single scene. Who's gonna tell you shit? Yeah, we see Jenna walking into the house and we cut back to Brin like I mean, you don't share I kind of even know your real name Wow, so we don't even know your job, Brin. What is your job? Okay, we had to look on to LinkedIn to find out some strange thing about

giving Dove Essentials to the poor. Okay? Like if you tell us that, we'll talk about opening it on us, be opening it on us with us. So Jenna walks in, she's all happy and Brynn's just giving her a stank face. She's like, she's like really angry.

And Jessal of course hugs her. She's like, oh my wealthy and rich friend. Hello, how are you? Have you ever gone to Vietnam for a bond meet? That's crazy, right? Mm-hmm. Oh, and she's like, I'm sorry, I got lost. She's in like a nice dress.

She's in like a nice dress. Guess what I was doing. Guess what I was doing. Looking up, looking up at gift horse. Looking at gift horse in the mouth. I was still reading Aaron's linked. I mean friends linked in Okay close the window. I close it. Aaron goes my high It's time for commercial. It's time for a crap and commercial

So Aaron goes wow for someone who's so self-conscious about showing her skin. I see a lot of it right now Well, first of all conscious about showing her skin. I see a lot of it right now. Well, first of all, so obnoxious. Second of all, you know the whole reason was that she wants it to dance, that way she can show off her skin, which she never gets to. So this is like a very special thing for her. And like, now you're being caddy about it. So obnoxious. Now you're being caddy about someone's genetic disorder that they're like, definitely like self-conscious about. She got there early, got a base tan.

Do you think she's making up her genetic disorder now, or do you think she did exactly what she wanted to do, which was show up and get a base tan so she would feel more comfortable showing some skin, what she is now doing? Do you think she shaved off her eyelashes? Do you think that, do you think she did that on her way over to?

Slidey's terrible. So Brim's like like yeah, she looks like someone that just like went first class and stayed at the fourth seasons for a couple of days Who it is hard for me to be angry with someone when they look that good So now she pivots Changes horses midstream one of them she went from one gift horse to another So size like okay tell us everything. Why don't you come with us? And it was like, yeah, we were just talking about you. Yeah, we were really annoyed.

You didn't fly with us. And I heard you didn't even want to fly with us because it was coach. Jenna's like, who told you that? And she said, it goes, Aaron. I'm just scratching out. Okay, but that's not really exactly what I said, which she kind of did. But then we, Jenna tells us, she tells them, she's like, yeah, but like when I found out

we were flying coach, I asked my sister and they would look for another flight and they were like, but I'm your goddaughter. And I was like, yeah, I'm at IBI pay you. Still like I pay you in that title. Like you're allowed to call yourself my goddaughter because you do things for me, so do it or get out. So they did, and they look for a different flight. And the only one was available Monday,

and I was like, well, that'll give me enough time to like get some sun because I've just in the medic disorder. So you guys are so perfect. I'm like, no, no. No, you don't get it. So I was like, I got a spray tan. I got a spray tan. Jenna's like, well, that's not what You know, good. So I was like, I got a spray tan. I got a spray tan.

Jenna's like, well, that's not what I'm talking about. Like my genetic disorder, I have scars like all over and they get better when I get a little tan. And so I wanted to go at like Christmas time and I couldn't, I think it's like my friend got a puppy and then I was like, I'm gonna go the night before we came but then I was like, oh, I'll go to Miami but then like, they had to get my mouth done

so I couldn't go to Miami and so I couldn't go. And then like, I had to had to have a Michelle Obama for something and then Beyonce after that. And I'm just gonna name lots of famous people and strange excuses until you guys all stop, get off my back about this. Okay, so Shakira, Rihanna, the bad from succession and rock-a-friar-center.

Guys, I brought the famous minority owned F.A.O. Swartz truck. Rock for the other. So I was pretty busy. Okay. I was flying on a hoverboard shaped like the key to the city. I was giving some much needed exposure to the Michael Cors brand. Orange people everywhere were thanking me in first class by the way. I had a beautiful ribbon cutting with Michael Cours and Jane Polly. I'm rims like work. Um, so there's a puppy and

there's Miami and you got surgery. I'm confused. And so I was like, of course she doesn't think she did anything wrong. Jenna Lyons't think she did anything wrong. Jenna Lyons never thinks she did anything wrong. She literally did nothing wrong. She, you guys are trying so hard. You're like a bunch of Walmart porous, trying to be head Maria and her. She offered you some branded cake.

Okay, fuck off. The woman just tried to give you a piece of cake. Yeah, the only thing she did wrong was come up with some like half-ass excuse just now to explain the tanning situation. Like you said earlier, she didn't have to do. She could have just said, honestly, I wanted to come down earlier and I wanted to, I didn't want to fly a coach and that's that.

I'm famous. So then Jenna's like, That's right. And that's her big mistake here. Her big mistake is to the audience for not just saying, I don't owe you guys an explanation. I wanted to come early. I came early and now I'm here. Her big mistake is to the audience for not just saying, I don't owe you guys an explanation. I wanted to come early. I came early. And now I'm here. Yeah. Want to fight?

Yeah. So Jenna's like, well, I mean, if I looked like you, I wouldn't, I wouldn't come early. And Brin's like, Oh, don't use that. That's a cop out. She's okay. I don't know you by now. I'm like, Oh, wow. Okay. Themodel and the hot ass 20-something year old to 30-year-old are gonna tell somebody suffering from all this stuff that them being more confident because they have gorgeous youth and good looks is a cop out.

Fuck off to both of you, check your privilege. And then Brynn is like, Brynn's like, Brynn then decides to load upon some toxic positivity. She goes, but your skin's beautiful, you're beautiful, and you're the one, to one of the most fabulous women in the world. And which by the way, yes, yes to all of that. But I kind of feel like when you're in that position,

the less you want is someone to be like, oh, I understand you have these insecurities, but like honestly be quiet. You're beautiful. I don't need, we don, honestly be quiet. You're beautiful. I don't need, we don't need to get people. Your channel lines, like you're too famous to worry about shit like that basically is what it sounded like to me.

But now also just to flip, because I'm a flip flapper, I am running for president at the HIPAACRAP party, as you all know, I get being annoyed that this woman won't just say, I don't wanna fly coach, I came two days early. I don't, I get that. And I get her being like,

yeah, but genetic disorder and I have all this pain. And that's really why I did, but also I didn't want to fly coach. You don't have to use the genetic order disorder as an excuse. You shouldn't have to. Even if it's real, you should just be able to say,

I wanted to come two days early and I can't. I don't love the mixing trauma in with other things just to get off the hook and make can't. I don't love the mixing trauma in with other things just to get off the hook and make yourself invincible. I don't like it on any show, and I think that Jenna is a little bit guilty of doing it right now on this show instead of just saying, fuck off. Listen, why use trauma and really hurtful things when a simple fuck off will do? I mean, I don't think that she's just like using it as like an excuse. I think that she's, I think the tanning thing is something,

in my mind, I think she was like, oh, you know what, like, I wanna go down earlier so that we can get a tan before them. And like, what's the point of getting a tan and a tanning bet if I can get a tan and an anguilla? I'm gonna choose an anguilla. Oh, and I also get to fly business. So like it all makes sense to me.

I just sort of see Jenna as someone who's just like not as self assured in confrontation. And so she sort of like starts giving all these excuses because she doesn't want people to feel bad when all she really has to say is, yeah, I came down earlier. I wanted to and I could afford to and that's what I chose to do, end of story.

Well, when side tells her, I mean, come on, you're lovely, you're skin's lovely, you're a lovely human, come on. I was like, oh, there's lean on me, Sai. There she is. Now she can just lean on your Sai. And Jen is like, oh, but like what is the cop out?

Like my skin, I mean, have you guys ever seen my skin? I mean, I've like literally never walked on a red carpet with my skin and friends like, I wouldn't know because you've never shared anything with me. Just, yeah, but I don't share my skin. Like, have you ever seen a picture of me on the red carpet with my skin? Just, I don't look at you,

I don't look at pictures of you on the red carpet. And so now. And they all start cracking up. But, Jen is a lot of the hilarious because you're all pretending that you're on red carpet all the time and she actually has a major acting So now, and they all start cracking up. But Jenna's like, I'm glad to hear this, because you're all pretending that you're on red carpet all the time and she actually has a major acting like she's a mass all for being on one. I know Jenna's like,

I'm sure she's looked at every picture. And I was not expecting to walk into an interrogation about my decision to fly early. So Aaron's like, well, we just want you to be with us. And now you're here. Now that we've raked you over the colds and made you feel like shit for your decisions and your genetic disorder, we can have fun. Although some would say that we already did just have fun by doing that. Okay. So by the way, Aaron, who started all of this

just for fun. Oh, we just want to do here. That's all Jenna. That's all. So now everyone's changing for dinner and then Aaron checks it on Jenna. She's like, you okay? After I you know, made you seem like a total asshole and had all the girls yell at you and Made you like the pariah of the group. You okay now? Does it totally and then Aaron tells us she like gives this like a little smirk to the camera and she goes Actions have consequences Jenna. You can't expect us just not to be mad. But you didn't do anything to them. You suck, dude. That is such like a mean girl high school shit. You know, Aaron came on our Instagram last week and was like, why do you guys load me some of this? This is why we watched the episode. Also stop listening to this. This is not for you.

We are two friends who deserve to talk to you about whoever we want. to this. This is not for you. We are two friends who deserve to talk to you about whoever we want. Go away. This is not for you. In case you're still wondering, this is why. Just watch this little smirk on your face going, actions have consequences. Jenna, she trusted you in a moment of weakness, like a fucking idiot, and she still had to pretend you're disgusting butternut squash soup was good. Fond her teeth are telling you. So Jenna likes her room because she hasn't seen the other rooms yet. She's like, oh, this is charming. And then Jessel tells us,

you know when people used to be charming, it's like a fuck you like, oh, that place is so charming or my husband is so charming, his decision to fly to Vietnam for a bond being so charming, our husband is so charming. It's a decision to fly to Vietnam for a barn being so charming. Our children are so charming. Where they've got to go to a charming school because my charming husband bought pay for better schools and the charming school they're going to wind up in. Yeah, generous room is like that. Unfortunately, it's not charming because I would love to rub shoulders with those parents. Can you imagine an entire dynasty devoted to keeping but holes clean?

Those bears and their children to Montesquois schools also and they never have accidents. It's the brand to stay without accidents I know that shoulders within Yes, she is saying charming like my room is disgusting because you guys gave her this disgusting room, right? charming like my room is disgusting because you guys gave her this disgusting room, right? So, Brent's like, okay, stop. I'm trying to befriend my friends, so take her like a sure-room and then say, Brent did it. So he does, which is, you know, friendship through exploiting workers, which is always a fun way to a class in real housewives of New York trope. Some things don't go away. Aaron's like, oh, I love brand.

Thank you. Actually, I don't love brand. So now they're all doing their makeup for dinner and everything. And Jenna's in Jettles room. And now she realizes how the rooms are so much nicer than hers. And Jettles like, so my best friend, Jyn Alliance, when you arrived, you walked into, be a tense shit showroom, didn't you? Wasn't that wild, wasn't that crazy?

You can share with me I'm your best friend. Tell me all about it. And Aira, Jynas like, I mean, I just can't figure it out. There seems to be some kind of, I don't know, because I'm just never around girls, but maybe there's some like resentment and I don't know what I'm just never around girls but maybe there's some like resentment and I don't know what it is but it's like grown and I don't know how to figure it out and just it's like poor Jenna she's probably had an

amazing day on the beach getting massages and she looks so golden and relaxed and then she's thrown into the lion's den. Oh, poor sister Chen. I think there's a difference between taking someone's insecurity and then like using it in a negative way. Maybe you felt a little bit of that and she's like, I knew. I knew there's just something going on between Britt and I and like I don't even know what's happening. She just said some really not so nice things and like I don't know just something going on between Britt and I, and I don't even know what's happening. She just said some really not so nice things, and I don't know what's going on. It's almost like,

she's like a store, but I don't know which part of Rockefeller Center to put her in. And just like, it's just weird pent-up enemocity, I think. Now, I get Brynn is being the most outwardly rude at this point, but why is she not pissed at Aaron? Like why is she not pissed at Aaron? I don't know. I showed up and turned all the girls against her immediately. I would be pissed. Yeah, I don't know why she's not more pissed at Aaron.

So, Si and Brynn are talking and Si's like, what do you think about Jenna? And Brynn's like, I mean, I get the home like, I'm insecure, I need something, but like again, I would know, cause you don't tell me anything. And so I was like, yeah, how are we supposed to know? She literally did tell you both. You fucking idiots, I can't with these two.

The people, so Bryn's like, people. The people who complain the most about like, so and so didn't tell me anything. How am I supposed to, they don't share, they don't share. Those are the people, if you realize that people aren't sharing with you, maybe you should take stock in yourself because there's probably a reason

why people are not sharing stuff with you. Yeah. And then, so I said, oh, I mean, her whole thing, like what, I had to run around, I had to talk about a puppy, I had to go to a bodega, what is this? I added a bodega, and it's okay about a puppy, I had to go to a bodega, what is this? I added a bodega and that's okay, right? Cause I'm real New York.

And so Brynn's like, what am I pet peeves? It's excuses and nothing adds up. And I can see through your perfect tanjena. So I was like, and then all of that led you to come here on Monday, business class. And Jenna's like, well, I did what I needed to do for myself. And Jessel goes, so fucking what? And Jenna goes, it's not because I don't want to be with coach with all of you.

It's just, it isn't. It's just that like, you know, within her thing of saying it was like a cop out, I'm like, I don't even know what that means. I'm literally too famous to understand that slang at this point. And I've spent years trying to bend to make other people happy. And I'm not that place in my life where I can do that. Either we will talk and find a path where we won't. I don't know.

Yeah, I mean, listen, I've spent my whole life just trying to bend for people. And I have a genetic anti-bending disease. I literally can't bend. I can't make shadow puppets. It's that bad. I mean, it's just like two hands. People are like, what are those two hands? I'm like, no, it's supposed to be a duck flying. I just, I can't, I have to buy lacedless shoes. That's how much I can't

bend. Okay. Like either world talk, I'm fine to bother with about. Like, I don't even know at this point. And then it just cuts to the other two. Like, oh, really? You wanted to come out of Monday. So you you did what kind of people hold Hold it against a woman that she has her own mind or we're just going fucking backwards at this point You guys are lame. I hope you find something better to find about because you're literally looking so stupid And I hope the internet is dragging your asses. I hope they're dragging us I think it's just us everyone I think it's just us. Everyone seems to be really enjoying the show. Well, if it's a fun show, it's a fun show.

I'm enjoying the show too. I'm saying these ladies complaining about the same things every week are finding little than Aaron, finding your stupid little things to bitch out every week. I hope you guys are getting dragged. Hope you're having fun with it. And if not, tell people to come here so I can drag them.

They can hear me drive them because it was really fun for me. Thank you so much for being with us, you guys. We will be back with a million other recaps this week and every other Monday, except tonight, which will be earlier Tuesday, but it'll be 5.30 p.m. Pacific time for it. Crapy hour every other Monday on Instagram live. Love you guys, we'll talk to you later. Bye. Watch what crap ends with like to think it's premium sponsors. Ain't no thing like Allison King. Ashley Savoni, she don't take no baloney. She's not just a Sheila, she's a Daniella. Itch-Ols. Aaron McNickless, she don't miss no trickle-ists. She's never scary, It's the green fairy. Jamie, she has no less namey. Hava Nagila Weber.

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