Watch What Crappens - RHONY: Woah-tanic

Episode Date: August 2, 2018

The ladies of Real Housewives of New York end their trip to Colombia with a boat ride from hell and Ronnie is left alone to cover it while Ben is on a boat trip of his own? Will this whole show sink? This week's bonus episode is about our trip to the Just For Laughs Comedy Festival in Montreal. To hear it, become a Patreon member at Patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens. ***Limited Edition Trixie Monocle tees at crappensmerch.com avail through July! **Crappens Live is coming to Palm Beach, Atlanta and Denver! Find ticket links at watchwhatcrappens.com See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.Our Patreon Extras: https://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hey, Prime members, you can listen to watch what crap ends at free on Amazon Music. Download the app today. Get ready for a double load of Queen of Hearts. It's me, Jujubee, and I return to guide sexy singles through some ronchy blind dates. Cameras off. Voice only. Launching during pride. Queen of Hearts takes Miami by storm, with Daeders' Cuppe from Tampa Bayes, Just Chaz and Brittany Brave to name a few. Follow Queen of Hearts on Amazon Music or wherever you get your podcasts. Oh, when people return, they can't just one happens, but there's so much that happens. Watch what crap ends would like to think it's premium sponsors. Ashley Chivoni, she don't take no baloney. Prisbee, wow, where'd he dowry?

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The podcast about all that crap We'd love to talk about on ye old bros. I am Ronnie. I'm Ronnie Karen. I'm your host I'm from the Roseprick's bachelor podcast also you can find that just by going to Rosepricks calm Look it up. It's fun and Joining me today as always Nobody there is nobody here. Ben Mandelker had the opportunity to spend 12 days in an enclosed environment with his family, so good luck with that.

Buddy, I have guests lined up all week long, I did very good. And just yesterday, with a little Ben Ben, I was saying, you know what, before you leave town, I just want you to know, you are in good hands. I have host lined up and he's like, well, announce him on the show, people will get excited. I said, I'm not going to announce shit, because you know, the second I do that, people are going to just start dropping out one by one. Which of course has already happened, on my first day here alone. Now, this is a humongous episode of Real Housewives of New York City.

It is huge! I mean, we've been waiting for this forever, all of us. Mean Ben, but also you, anybody in the universe with the heart and a desire for, you know, action and excitement because this is the episode of Real Housewives of New York City, where the ladies go on a boat in Cotta Hena and almost die. Does anybody die? I don't know. I mean, they're all still on Instagram, but God knows. I mean, I don't know where Julie and Asanj is, but last time he was around, he was telling me there was some fake video shit. I don't even know if Ramona is real. And how would you know the

difference, really? I mean, you look at Instagram, you think you see Ramona, but she's such a robot anyway. You know, she's such a good doofus robot. That could really be anyone think about it. Hello, me, making a fuck of soda, okay? Here's how you do it. It's really big wine glass, then you squeeze some wine into it, then, yeah, it's ice, what? A robot could do that, like literally a robot could replace Ramona, but Thank God a robot has not replaced Ramona because She's here and she's on a boat Now the whole point of all of this is there is nobody to stop me and say you know what? Shut up. You're talking too much. You're making no sense. You've made Ramona a robot

Robots are way smarter than Ramona. Okay, I get that But have you ever used a Rumba? They're not very smart, they're idiots. So first of all, don't use that argument on me. And second of all, ha ha ha, I'm free I can do whatever I want. So, never done this before. We're gonna try it out for the first time today. This might be a huge disaster, I'll end up crying.

Becoming addicted to drugs. You know, well, harsh or drugs. And then quit. You know, be gone. By the time Ben comes back There will be nothing here. Although I'll just burn everything down. I'll go online. I'll delete our entire account I'll find that bitch social media, and I will uh Killer, you know, all the crap and accounts under her name But until then guys here we are just me and you And we've got Real Housewives of New York City. Now if you are hating this episode and you're like fuck this, this guy's a loser, he can't

do this alone, do not worry. Ben is coming back next week. Ben might also be calling in from the boat at any moment this week to talk about this episode because he is really mortified to be missing it. And I also have the two judgey girls from Instagram to celebrities coming on to discuss this show. And I will also be discussing this episode throughout the week with various celebrity guests hoping of course that they show their asses up and do their fucking job. My God I made it. I think we're

gonna be okay guys. Alright, let's get going. In the marathon of marathons, I ran a marathon! Bleh! I'm currently being caught, but my liver is like a reeling. Eighth is an issue of mind-to-primament. If you don't have a mind, why doesn't matter? Come on! Why would I could if I could just order? Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee the morning after. So it's morning and there's a huge spread put out on the table and the first thing I noticed is that there's a close-up of this giant tray of eggs, this hard-boiled

eggs, and they are touching the scrambled eggs. So if that boat doesn't kill everybody on here, maybe the side of this will kill Carol. I don't know. I'm just looking for somebody to die at any moment, basically. So Sonia's the first up, and she sees Bethany out there, and she's like, Oh, that was on my bucket list to say, Oh, I did it. Oh, and Bethany is, you know, still, really? From last night, she like, I never felt less relaxed. Jesus Christ, like a bit of a salty Jesus. Literally seriously, she talked to me like that,

can you believe it? I don't know, no, no, no, no. Then Ramona comes in, you know, just what you need when you're feeling really stressed out. Ramona comes in, she's wearing this bathing suit. I'm guessing that she's trying to like show off what she got for free from the Instagram doctor, because you know, that's where all the boob, the boob jobs come from on these

shows. They get them for free. And then they, you know, put them on Instagram and stuff for like a huge discount, which I'm for. You know, why would you pay for boobs if you can get them from in stuff? So she's like showing off her boobs. And, you know, Ramona is always talking about her stomach and her, her body and like her, her age and stuff like that. And I really think Ramona has kept it very well together. She doesn't really have a six pack. She has basically a coat can. Just like a solid can of coke.

Like a standing up can, not a sideways can. Okay, so, Lewin Carroll joined while Ramona is telling everybody the day's activities. You know, we're going to island island. Island, that's where they manage people. Why the fuck will we go to an island? Jesus Christ, what does it talk to him? Ro, like what does he need? What am I supposed to take cash cards?

I'm doing enough. Okay, get mine. Get mine. Seriously. You know what I think? I'm thinking about last night and I think of all this stuff that happened to Dvrinta and the way I think was the worst thing everything happened you know like I couldn't even support I couldn't even tell like who supports other women like which one oh you

know what now my gosh it's all coming back to me okay little girl walking through the birchers trying to hide from my death and all this said I saw the highs from those last night and everybody's wrong So Luan Luan sits down for breakfast and she's just like can we just get to the island? You know Luan is Struggling through what basically every other person who sober ever like I don't mean sober like you quit drinking I just mean like sober right in this moment, you know It's just the attitude

you have, which is like, why? Like, what's about to happen and why do I have to deal with it? You know what I mean? Like, I feel that right now, and I'm certainly not in rehab, you know. But before it last week, it was, oh, can we just go shopping? And this week, can we get to the island? You know, it's very, it takes a lot of practice to be sober and just not be pissed off all the time. That's why I very rarely do it So Carol's trying to make small talk What's about gonna be like it's a fucking buff boat Carol. What do you think it's gonna be like? It's a boat Shut up. It's not gonna be good. Okay. We've got to go to an island We've got to be on a boat for hour and a half. I just hope we can support other women.

So Luanne is doing her like, I'm serving her my self-right. Just so. Oh, look at this, it's eggs, boo. Oh, would you mind bringing me some orange juice? Oh, what is this orange juice? Who is this orange juice? So she's in a mood. So finally they're, you know, like she's not gonna be ignored.

So they finally ask her how she's doing. And she's like, well, I got stalker punched. So I don't know how I'm supposed to feel. I don't know when the last time was you got stalker punched. But it doesn't feel very good. Um, does she even remember? Does she remember what she did to me? I'll say you're remembered last night, but I don't know if she's gonna remember today.

You know, like seriously, like, I know one thing that's gonna be remembered. Puerto Rico is gonna remember getting the the free like, jaggings that I gave them, you know, like, you may not have a house, but you have jeans that are like jingle wherever you walk. You know what I'm saying? Like, Amy. So, it turns out he comes in, um, the girls all start gathering. And they're still talking about Durinda and Liu is trying to give the nice version of her story, which really I don't think Liu's

story, I don't think what she did was that bad. Do you guys, I really don't think it was bad just like you're starting to turn. You know, it's like when you're about to crash your car and you're driving and there's someone in the passenger seat and you put your arm to protect them It's a protective thing, you know, I mean Yes, of course it meant like you're getting drunk, Durinda But I think that even if she was drinking she could have said that because I mean Durinda like was like drawing hearts on her face with lipsticks at this point, you know Well, all I really did was tell her Durinda you're starting to turn and she thinks it I was basically saying you know. Well, all I really did was tell her, Durinda, you're starting to turn, and she thinks

I was basically saying, you know, I've stopped drinking and now I have a problem with alcoholics. And you know everyone here knows that I don't. I mean, I'm in a cabaret! If it weren't for alcoholics, no one would come to see me. I mean, I'm very supportive of alcoholics. Well, she felt judged. You know, she says you were being very countasy.

Oh, countasy, ho! That's what everyone reverts to. You know what, ladies? Can we set this straight? The countis is my hashtag. Okay, it's my hashtag. Do you know that I have a playlist? I have a playlist.

I have so I have a hashtag. Deal with it. My show is called Hashtag Countess and Friends. Should we call Queen Latifah or Lady Gaga? Is Lady Gaga, Lady? Come on! I know that Lou Ann's gonna be very successful with Cabaret's because she's already

like just repeating the same material over and over again. You know, like Hippocrat, I know, by the way, because hello, who are you listening to right now? But I got it, you know, like Hippocrat. I know, by the way, because hello, who are you listening to right now? But I got it, you know, like this is my cabaret people. But she's just repeating it all the time. She needs to like get things other than this queen Latifah thing, you know? Like, it's still a top-larillion, sir.

It's a little Richard really little. It's Derek Queen, really a queen. Come on! So Dorenda comes and the big question on everyone's mind is, is this bitch still wasted because, you know, when you drink a lot and then you have to wake up in the morning and, you know, there's Coke being passed around this whole damn town. We already know that. So we're just kind of looking to see, but Dorenda's looking fine, you know, I mean, her face isn't red, you with lipstick, so that's good. So she comes in and that Luanne's still going off about oh

Well everybody understand Is little Debbie really little which whose little are Debbie or Richard the probably both fat All right Luanne now I really get it. Okay, like seriously like I get it down. Okay. Oh, I'm sick of this There I put it to rest. Does everyone understand? Okay, you know what? If you don't want to call me the Countess, how about this girl's? You can call me a Lou. Just call me Lou. You can call me Lou too, Durinda. Eh, really? I'm I live. I'm I live. I get to tell you Lou. After all I've done for you, I can't say call you Lou. Alright, questions answered. Still wasted.

She still wasted. Yay! God, that woman knows how to commit. So the man was planning on Dorenda doing her usual thing where she comes down and she's, you know, sorry, the next day. But Dorenda has decided to just buck that thread. Also, she only really does that when she's sober and she's apparently not.

So maybe that'll come later. But for now. She's like, I'm all in, I'm all in. You're all well and I like everything I've done for you. I'm all in, I can call you look. I'm all in, I can do things for you. Oh really, what have you done for me? I've been through clicking, I've been laughing, don't you point your finger at me. I can do what I want. I can do what I want. He's a very sweet. I love babies. So Sonia who's got her finger on the pulse of you know everyone's spirituality these days is like you know I think that something deeper is going on here. The man is rebuilding herself and getting better and Durantes, well I want to put it but she made that with that party believe in last night

That was lighting up and then started punching a baby. So you know make of that what you will With only people he's been good to you only people it is dancing to you. You're gonna come for me You're gonna come for me. Oh, is this what you come with come downstairs with after last night This is what you're gonna come down with. You lack kidney. I did not lecture you. How dare you? I'll think about it, Lou.

Think about it. So just tell me what you did for me. I said loves. Morning, gloom, and night. Many seconds I'd been left for you. Skinny fat, big little fast, slow, button, button, sky, ground, water, like water, ocean water, all sorts of things. Does anybody know what the fuck Durinda is saying? I don't, but I'm trying to write down every single word because I feel like it needs to be written down somewhere for somebody in the future, you know.

I can never know how we're gonna be remembered. I'd like to think we're having a pretty good time, but Jesus Christ, you read the internet, and it's like the sky is falling every fucking day. And look, I'm not saying that it's not. I'm just saying that in the future, you know, maybe people are gonna be looking through our history and thinking, Jesus, this was like the dark time before the world ended. But, you know, at least they had Dorenda. And out up down fast, slow mountain hill. Butter my joy. That's what I did for you. And now everyone's just staring at Dorenda as she like gets food while she's

still pointing her finger at the air and shouting nonsense. So she's like, oh, look at L.A.L.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.E.R.E.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R.E.R. that I just said, I didn't either. I just wrote it down phonetically. Okay. I just wrote finger point, finger point. Hey, you did really do. Bethany's brand is like, be charitable or whatever. So she sees the charity case and she just jumps right in. She's like, you know, maybe she's just like, you know, like stop, you know, like, is this what you really want to do right now? Okay. You know, it's not. Wouldn't you rather build a roof over right now? Okay, you know, it's not. Wouldn't you rather build the roof over your head? Like, wouldn't you rather focus your energy on that

or something? You know what, best of me, say it out of it. I don't get involved with you getting involved in the ass, me getting involved. You got no skin in this game, balcony, gag. She's gonna humble my ass and try and talk to me about things like this and for all other people and humble me hey um I know that we're not talking about a logical person right now but let's just remember that

Durantar did all of this in front of other people too you know it just has to be noticed or noted rather because you know I'm a recap her okay and I take my responsibilities extremely seriously you you guys. So Ramona just throws her hands up because Ramona is like very mature this year. Okay, even though you can't tell her age, okay? You know, people are always telling me when I order a drink, can I see your ID? And the one I show it to them, they're like, whoa, you're very mature for your age. They're like two little roosters, okay?

Just like fighting front of everyone. Ridiculous. Just cross the rope roosters. You know what I mean? Like I'm sick of it. Then everyone could say why did the Roosters cross the road? And I could say because I told them I sick of it, okay? It's ridiculous, okay? It's just mind-blowing matter. Well here's what I think. Oh, shut up, Bethany Jesus. It's none of your business. You're always in everyone else's business. Oh really? I'm the one I never

win this business. How about last night when you went to see we're talking about business and my business and you're my business and my little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little little God, everybody just needs to calm down. We all win. We need to learn how to, uh, or other women. And that's the Heather. That girl's total, boom. And then Sonya talks to us again, just shakes her head and crosses her eyes, you know, like shaking her hair thing that she does. She's like, ah, I mean, we are just one bucket list

empanada into breakfast. And these ladies are just losing their minds Oh, yeah, you know what I'm gonna do. I'm gonna walk away. I'm gonna walk away. I got my grand slam I got my impanada. I'm gonna walk away and go in and see if that's what I could do Okay, and you don't know how far I could walk away Louie and you know how far I can walk away? You're about to find out! Fucking Dorinda's in Canada by the end of this episode. So then Dorinda doubles down with us, and they weren't doing these talking heads in Mexico, I don't think. I mean, I'm guessing they did them way after the fact in New York or somewhere, wherever.

And Dorinda tells us, you know, I don't regret, well, I say to rent checking. Okay, I could be very mean, she's doing checking okay I could be way mean and I was I was looking back it's so crunchy to watch because you know that she in her mind she thinks that like everyone's rooting for her you know what I mean so awkward I've wondered you know watching this show why people haven't called out to Rinda for being such a lush because people love to call that shit out on the internet. They're like, you're a drunk. It's like people's favorite thing.

And then I realize, oh, they're supporting her. And being like, oh my god, we love how you're always wasted and yelling at people because they're getting hurt at that point where they can really rip her down and just be like, sit down, you drunk drunk, go home! Or whatever. And man, she's really rolling with it. So she goes downstairs with her big plate of feet, and everybody's just sitting there, you know,

shaking their big tassel earrings that Carol gave them. And Leigh Wands like, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, can you believe it? Can you believe it? Can you believe it? I'm Carol tells her. Well, you know, I just she doesn't like you know, she felt judged by you Well, I just said you're about to turn You know, what am I supposed to do? I say the same thing to a banana and they never yell at me She just had that look on her mug, you know, oh I get it. I get it more than you know

I give what it's like to be treated like that. By someone who he thought likes you. But then it turns out that they don't like you at all. I can tell what that's like. I know what that's like. Of course, makes it all about her, which is like so, Bethany. And Carol's like, oh really?

I could tell that you're not into me. Oh really? Because you're not into me. No, you're not into me. Nope, you're not into me. Oh really? Because you're not into me. No, you're not into me. No, you're not into me. Nah, I mean, you just want a text 24, 7. And if I don't text you back, you get mad. I'm sorry, but to me, I'm busy, busy.

What do you mean, that's all I do? What, that's all I do is have text. Like, I don't have Puerto Rico. Like, I don't have a daughter Like I don't I don't have like a skinny jeans with belts on them Like what are you talking about like I don't have cool cuts to prepare like what are you talking about like I don't have clip art to get ready for Like new products skinny girl skinny girl Puerto Rico skinny girl skinny girl skinny girl Wow, what I got time to send you text well, but it's just that when you do want to text, you want to write there and I have to return it right then.

I can't just give it a month and blow you off because I found a richer younger friend who gives me into better places like you're so sensitive. We text all the time. That's like all we did. We text, text, text. Well now you don't have the same kind of time and now now I don't have time, cause I'm busy. Beeing busy. So Bethany is just sitting there shaking her head, you know, trying to figure out how to be a victim, which? Look, I'm up and down with Bethany. I mean, for the most part, she's a dick.

Okay, like we all know that. But I can never tell if she's right or wrong. I mean, at the beginning of this season, she was totally in the wrong, because Carol didn't even know that she was mad at her, and she's like going around behind Carol's back, slamming her to anybody who would listen and stuff like that. So I was like, yeah, I'm on Carol's side. And then Carol was writing all those blogs, like slamming Bethanym being like, oh, well, here's a literary, there's a literary point of you. Um, and I was all for it, but then as time went on, I kind of saw what Bethany is talking about.

Could kinda hate this show, brainwashes you. So now I just don't know, you know, it's like choosing between two assholes. Don't do it, like they all poop. So everyone's just sitting there like quiet and shocked and then Carol touches her stomach and she's like Maybe we shouldn't go on the boat trip Maybe we shouldn't go on the boat trip the boat trip The boat trip I want to go on the boat. Why should we go on the boat? It's beautiful boat It's so beautiful. Everyone's like do exercise. Do we healthy? The boat's like yeah, that's why you can't tell how old I

Everyone's like do exercise do we healthy the both like yeah, that's why you can't tell how old I Crazy I'm just gonna take a breath. What nicotine a millionaire heart huh? and So tensley is all depressed because you know this is her trip and And everyone's miserable so Carol walks off and Bethany, you know does her like announcement to the table, which is really too tensly to repeat later. And it's uh, you know, I love her. I care. I just wanted to be happy. You know, like she's not feeling me and I get it. Like I just realized like I've seriously,

literally, and hysterically crying. Like I've just never had a level of friendship that's at this level. That's just disintegrated. Like this, that's at this level that's just disintegrated like this that's like really because you've been on this show a long time and I have a DVR bitch so Chinsley of course is the young one and she's gonna remind us by telling Bethnith she just really needs to shake it off you know I mean look out happy Taylor Swifties. Those Diet Coke commercials. Sitting around in her, two to writing a song. You know, I mean, I'm with it.

That's not terrible advice. Matt, she's just not that enemy. She's not that enemy. She's not that enemy. She's not that enemy. It's funny that Carol sees herself as kind of a carry Bradshaw. And Bethany just keeps repeating lines from Sex and the City. I'm really liking that about this episode.

You know what? Use what I've gotta to tell you this is advice. Okay? Because this is from Doctor of Ramona. Okay? People come and go in your vites. That's just how it is. Like sometimes they come and then they leave right away and then they come back and then sometimes they'll just be gone and then they come and then you're like who are you? And they're like, I don't know who are you and then you mean. And that's like when you first come and then they'll go, you know, and it's like different. Like sometimes you'll come into people's lives. You know what I mean? Like, look at me.

Look at my kitchen right now. In the Hamptons, okay? It's not in a disgusting part of the Hamptons, like your house. You bought, okay? Like my house, you know, just like a guy named Mario comes in and he fixes stuff. Like he's doing the bathroom right now, okay? Like in my house, you know? There's like a guy named Mario comes in and he fixes stuff. Like he's doing the bathroom right now, right? And then he finishes the bathroom, and then he leaves. And then a guy comes and he does the kitchen, and I go,

I can't even believe this is empty room. What is this kitchen? Like was supposed to be. Like am I thinking about Mario? No, because who knows? Maybe he'll come back. I'm like, do a bathroom upstairs. You know what I'm saying Bethany

I'm Bethany is just looking at her like Jesus Christ But it's what I'm trying to say cares what you need to tell her it's like a different kind of friendship down. I'm never gonna forget what she did So Carol goes off to find Durin to see if she's like huffing paint or whatever Oh Maybe you should talk to Liu. Right, you ain't got to see me. You ain't got to see me. Maybe you should just talk to her and quiet, you know, privately without an audience. There's so much to the audience. Liu just like pops up in the hallway going through her purse. Um, so Dorenda and Liu Ann look at each other and Dorenda doesn't know whether

she's gonna like jump jump at Luanne to strangle her, or what, like she means on the balcony looking like, you know, gangster, but then Luanne just looks at her with that, ugh, look, and so they hug. And she's like, I swear, she turns into that beggie, like, please forgive me thing that we all do, like after, like, a rage. She's like, I really, I love you.

It's the way to get it. It's really, I love you so much. Oh, I know you love me, but it's just that there's so much anger there. So much. But then right in, it's actually, it was anger. Duranda, really, there wasn't anger there. Jesus, what is it that coffee cup? I feel like he was judging me but I wasn't I wasn't judging you quietly I said it quietly because you gave me this look you know

Was that look when that green person like he starts to get angry and then he turns all big and green mr. Fairley no, you know the one who's like calm and he's nice just kind of nerdy and then he gets mad and he gets he turns green. Pah-bye no. Durrinda come on look at him. I was thinking I was even drunk and you had one drink. It's not about how much you drink Durrinda. That's what you said to me after. I mean you called me a countess. I you would come at me and you would have my family day and take to Rinda We'll thank you up for a new cliff and it's in the lighthouse, but I'm not going back there No, that's not what I was gonna say. I was just gonna say if you want a hashtag counterson french shirt They're at the front of the they're at the front of the theater on the way out

If you want me to sign them as fifty50 extra? What's wrong with that? I was not saying what you think I was. And then the music is like, boom, boom, boom, boom. Which is all Jorinda needed to just fly right off the hand and only can her crooked finger comes up and start spunting the air. And she's like, well, you know what, that's how I felt.

And if you're gonna be like it to say, I might be. You know what, I feel like well you know what's that sound like pal and if you're gonna say I you feel like it to say I might feel you know I feel like you were coming to be celebratory and if you need an apology then maybe you should get me an apology. When I was looking at her like she looked at that cup of coffee that she had for the first time ever you know like she just doesn't know what to fuck to do with it she doesn't know what it is she doesn't know she can take it back, like if you get a refund on this shit, like is it always this better, really? Look, I'm sorry that you thought I was judging you, but I wasn't, but then the way you reacted to it, it was just so dark, alright that was gonna do, you're dark!

And with self-tanner, how many times do I have to tell you bitches? Oh yeah. Tanner how many times do I have to tell you bitches? Oh, yeah So Luanches size and they look at each other and then to render like flips into that beggie, you know that beggie post-drug sing again But there was so much anger But there was so much anger. All right, Durinda. All right. So the Wanthouse, I shall never be able to forgive Durinda for calling her a a cactus with a mugshot. And then they hug and Durinda.

Durinda goes, let's go together. Let's go away together for 21 days. And the Want says, I'll go with you. It's, you know, to rent a medication. I don't think she meant rehab. Um, and Lou Ann has to keep going back to rehab because it's 28 days, not 21. These women, Jesus. It's time for commercial. It's time for... Celebrity Beef, you never know if you're just gonna end up on TMZ or trending on Twitter or in court.

I'm Matt Bellaside. And I'm Sydney Battle, and we're the host of Wonder Woman's new podcast, Disantel. Each episode explores a different iconic celebrity feud, from the build-up, why it happened, and the repercussions. What does our obsession with these feud say about us? We're starting off with a pretty messy love triangle between Selena Gomez and Justin and Haley Bieber, a seemingly innocent TikTok of Selena talking about her laminated eyebrows. It's no bald into a full-blown alleged feud. But it doesn't seem like fans are letting up anytime soon.

Despite both Selena and the Bieber's making public statements denying any bad blood. How much of this is teen jealousy and lovers quarreling, and how much of it is a carefully crafted narrative designed to sell albums? Follow this and tell wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen ad-free on the Amazon Music or Wonder yeah. What happens commercial? So back at the table, Bethany is still yawning on and on and on and on. And tell me the girl, look, where I'm at? So like if I'm talking to her, just let me say something stupid. Even if you think it's stupid, just let me say it because like,

she's not that into me. Like she doesn't need me, you know what I mean? Like she just doesn't need to jump on me all the time. You know what I mean? Like, what was I crying? It's pretty obvious. Like I wasn't crying because the sausage wasn't cutting half, okay? Like that's a literal thing that she says. I was crying because, you know, like, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah,? It's pretty obvious. I wasn't crying because the sausage wasn't cut in half Ramona is just shrugging, you know, which she does.

This shh. RUG! Yeah, leave it. Two. Roast. Oh, five. RUG. Hey.

So finally, Sonia is like, um, she's right behind you. And Carol's there. Carol's like, hi. I'm here. She's up. Well, that's fine. Well, I would have said it's your face anyway. So what do I care? And then Bethany like whips out her phone and starts like flicking, you know, like her passive aggressive flicking like we're gonna

Me I'm trying to pages. I'm trying so many pages on some PDF. I'm reading about skinny girl jeans I don't even care like literally do whatever you want like I'm just about flicking while I'm here good Then you heard me do you hear this you know because it's silent, but I'm flicking. I'm flicking right now I'm flicking so then Bethany switches into her new tactic because that one really doesn't work with Carol. And this one works even worse, which is crying. You know, Carol can't be around somebody crying. Carol is that kind of person who, if she happened to be a nurse like in a baby ward, she'd smother babies. You know those nurses and Bethany's like, no, it just, I just, I just, I just, I've never, I've never had something like this, like a friendship that like disintegrated like this.

You know, back home, Jill Zarin is like punching a pillow right now, by the way. It's like losing a family member. It's like losing a family member. Um, by the way, she doesn't speak down here for family. Oh, there was a shift where you were questioning our friendship. She's talking like she's talking to a baby, which she is. And then this happened and then things were said and then we talked about it and I thought things were better and then I bought everyone earrings and then we were having fun and then

we had breakfast and eggs were touching and no one asked me about my feelings about that. And Bethany finally knowing that she's not going to get a hug on apology, which is really all she wants. Just says, you know what, I'm a wreath. And relationships shouldn't require this much work. If anyone by the way, just a quick favor to ask, if anyone has seen any kind of work that Bethany has put into this relationship, could you point out those clips to me. So the ladies all get in the car to go to the boat to go to the huts or whatever they're doing. And I'm so happy that they finally have something new to talk about.

Bethany's poop! Oh my god, I haven't pooped once like seriously, is anybody pooped? Like I don't even remember what pooping feels like. Someone talk about it, someone tell me what it's like to put it. And Dorenda says, is it crones? Fucking Dorenda. You know, Dorenda, before Webim D, Dorenda was the person in town who scared the shit out of everybody. It's like I have a headache.

You know, are you seeing SPAC? Are you tired? Are you tired sometimes? You don't know why you're probably dancing. So Bethany explains that she went to the doctor about her non-pooping. By the way, just for anybody who doesn't need medical advice about not pooping, poop comes from food that you eat.

So in order to create poop, you have to eat things. Okay, that was just a little medical side note, so thanks for joining. So Bethany went to the doctor and she's like, they told me I have a torturously long colon. Okay, it's like torturously done. That's the medical term that they used, okay? So they get to the boat and Lewan tries out her Spanish

in case she ever comes to Colombia for her show. Well, when I was dear, they all get drinks and Ramona doesn't want us to forget her storyline in the middle of all this because a lot's been going on. You know, let's not forget that Ramona is still here too, guys. Oh my god, maybe this drink will take the way, the pain away from my ankle. Oh my god, hurt my ankle. I don't know if everybody here heard that. Do you guys know how to say that in Spanish?

Bethany and Carol sit down and you know with a drink or two everybody's fine, you know, so Bethany and Carol are like I love you I'm sorry. I love you. I'm sorry. No, no, no, you are. No, you are. No, no, you are. You are So they get on this boat the boat leaves and Sony is just be fuddled by this boat They get on this boat the boat leaves and Sony is just befuddled by this boat Sonya the poorest one on this thing who is currently renting out her house Sony is walking around just like completely confused. Is this considered a yacht? I mean Is this a yacht because I don't see any Saudi men with Rolexes? Who booked this? Hmm, they get to these little hut things and they're really beautiful. It's Hutz often are and they look around.

They're having fun and Margarita comes in and she's their house manager lady and she's like, hello, welcome. Do you remember me? I'm a girl. Yeah, I think I had you a macaereeta, but I don't want to be with you. Give me a lecture. Okay. Mermona just walks around the villa is going, this is wow whoa wow wow this is wow whoa whoa whoa

Right when you turn another corner you go whoa it's wow Well so romantic I wish I was with a guy, but oh well Love for sale Carol and Luan fried this little crab this dead which is very sad. Let's trick Ramona! I love making Ramona square. So they that was Karen Hueger by the way. Luan has turned into Karen Hueger in this recap. So they fuck with Ramona and put it in the the what do you call those things relay in them. Penis is also resting them in baby banana hammock hammock. Luan and Ramona get in the hammock and it just turns into a Ramona.

It's a spider. Oh, you know what? I'm lucky that I didn't roll off the hammock and spray my ankle even worse. My ankle is really bad. Her, my ankle is terrible. Then in the same breath, looks over her shoulder and tells her, waiter, oh, I would like a white, white and a stamped wine glass. Please, stamped with a stem on it. So everybody's swimming and having a good time and Sonya's lit, you know,

so Bersonia. Sonya's the best kind of sober. She's the real housewives of New York kind. We're, you know, it's all temporary. So she's flashing them and bending over and showing her butt and stuff. And they're all cracking up because she's still wearing her price tag. Which of course she is. It's probably still got that little plastic thing. The store is still probably trying to find whoever stole that damn bathing suit. Like, oh boy. Look at that. Her price tag is still on that bathing suit. Hey, hey, Tommy, let me see your butt.

Let me see your butt. There's one thing you never want to say to Sonya. And that's let me see your butt. She bends over and just basically pulls out her cornhole for everybody to see. And it's disgusting. And the camera men are just still shooting. I mean, these people deserve warpate. This episode is putting them through a lot.

I have the tags on purpose because if I decide I don't like it and I sell it a continent store, you better get a good deal. Sony is gonna pee all over this thing in a minute, by the way. And you know she's still gonna return this fucking suit. So everybody's swimming and Tarenda's just sitting on the dock, you know, which is generally what I do when the drunk is starting to wear off, you know, where you're like, really make you wear, make you, is there a guy? You know what I just realized? Dog backwards is God. So Bethany, who basically has no one to talk to since Sony is off, you know, corn holding. Is that your coming in? Is that coming in, Tarenda? Young warrior, I'm good. The one thing you never got at you is worry abouting. It's like you're coming in, coming in to Randa? Young warrior, I'm good.

The one thing you never got to do is worry about me. It's a good thing about me. I mean, unless you're a pedestrian. Can't but I do worry about you. I'm very sensitive, I'm a very sensitive person. I just wish I had some hundred calorie packs of some skinny girl popcorn to give you right now because that makes everybody feel better.

Skinny girl, part of regal. You know, I mean these trips is like, want to drink, and I'm gonna have fun. But then you don't want people to get mad at me. Wanna make it more to do? Well, you're supposed to drink in secret, which she does. So Bethany and Dorenda go off in the bushes while Dorenda scarves Derenda drink. And then Bethany makes it about her again.

She's like, yeah. And I was like, like, you're being called to drink, and then like, Carol's not that enemy. Like, it's totally the same thing. Totally get it. Yeah, but I can't wait. It's gonna convince you. Oh my god. I thought someone was knocking on my door telling me to shut the fuck up. Thankfully it was just Mueller scratching his, um, his collar. Um, because you know, I was about to yell at the neighbor, I don't care what time it is. I do not care. I have very important things to report in here, okay? But you know, it's not the way we're gonna come down to the power station. Maybe she can't live like hell or a game.

She's like, earn the win. She can't be a three in the morning. And I wanna be someone you always callin' a rough time. Durinda, you do not need to be anybody that anybody calls in a rough time. I'll learn like anyone, like... Where are you? This is like neighborhood. You dress... I knew someone you lived in that black. Have you ever tried little fruits stand in the street? No, they tell fruits, but if you say a especially word, they'll give you a ham sandwich. All you have to do is say look the man. I love you. I love jazz. I love your performance. You, uh, yeah, that's the story. You hear whatever, whatever, just do anything to make her feel better.

All right, let me go do this. So she finds Luan and they sit down and they do that thing that they do. Luann's doing that thing now that she's totally believing that she's an international sensation. Where anytime she talks to somebody, she talks right with her face in that other person's face, like really close. Like two inches away from their face, like, Are you getting this close up on camera? Are we in a one shot? Alright, uh, wind machine, wind machine. Like too close to someone's face.

And uh, to render apologize is again. I'm sorry, I hate you, the wheel is so, I hate you. You know, I know you are, that's okay. It's just that the things you said, they were so dark. I just felt so low. It's like when they let me out of jail. And I'm not judging. It's just that after what I've been through, I worry about you, which is basically judging. She's like, hey, I found out surprise, you know, by surprise that I was an alcoholic. And now I'm telling you, by surprise that you're an alcoholic. And then so Dorenda starts getting defensive again,

but she kind of calms herself down and is like, look, this is the sorry moment. I can yell at her in three weeks at the reunion, you know. And then Luanne makes it official and tells us, well, but Dorenda just does the same thing over and over again. What do they call that? It's um, um, uh, someone who does something over and over again. It's a definition of cabaret singers what it's called one two three So Bethany and Carol are at the table and there's you know that awkward coconut music playing and where they've just said We love you. We love you and now they're looking at their phones It seems kind of awkward, but I'm a waiter so I've seen that so many times in the restaurant and look when people are sitting

there quietly dinner staring at their phones that can mean true love. I mean, I just want a man to let me sit there and stare at my phone. Is that too much to ask? So Tinsley and Tinsley comes to the table and you know Bethany hates everything about her at the moment and Carol is wearing a red scarf under her hat, like Michael Jackson, whatever. And since he says, oh my god, that scarf under your hat, it's like Jennifer Lawrence, she's in a campaign right now, but I don't have my photo looking all bad. And Carol explains, it's an officially reds well.

Literally, so much heat me. Like, seriously, what are we going to talk about close? What are we going to talk about? Shopping like, seriously, shoot me in the that's that's what I want is there a waiter around here I want to order a gun to shoot myself for the face okay that would be great well you're the one you shops all the time you shop really well you know what if someone's his shopping again I'm gonna like pull my dramatically long colon out with the crab fork and I'm gonna strangle him with it okay when you shop mean, you shop more than anyone! You know what?

I don't think we should fight about it, because look at us, we're all fascinistas at this table. What do I guess means lunch is done, because Ramona goes, finito, I don't know. Durantantinsley or an hammock and, uh, it's rocking back and forth.

So Ramona comes over to make this like the worst hammock experience you can ever have in your life and starts like pushing them really hard I want never said better. I think it's just because I'm so happy cuz God was so freaking cute. Okay, Tinsley Okay, you cut them man now. Congratulations. So proud of you. You got them man. You want it? Okay, but that's only one facet of a lady's personality. Okay? So now what do you want to do? You want to create a business? Hard person on the thing, or you want to have your husband just be everything in your life, you know? Which is fine because a lot of people do that, I guess.

Like a lot of people we'd normally call losers, you know? Normally do that. First of all, Ramona, I was the first one in this group. I'm just saying, okay? I'm saying now, not in the past, okay? Talk about things that are happening now, like the fact that I'm just saying, okay? I'm saying now. Not in the past, okay? Talk about things that are happening now. Like the fact that I'm almost pushing you in a full tilted over position right now. In this hammock, nobody's even reacting. I had my fashion line. I'm with Columbia University. I'm a really smart girl, okay?

Tinsley, I'm just talking about now. Not other things he did back then. I don't want to have a job. Is that okay? Like, for once in my life, I just don't want to work. These women, the women I know, they work because they want to, not because they have to. Then she jumps on the hammock and she's like, what's a wifey? Someone tell me what a wifey is.

What is that? Teach me how to do it. And then she spells 10, wine all one all over Tinsley's button. She's really upset because you know, Tinsley really hasn't had enough time to talk about how wonderful or rich Scott is, you know. Thankfully, this wasn't the other way around. So that Tinsley wouldn't have to hear, you know, what? Who are you to get me wet? Okay, Tinsley. So inside Luan is deciding to get back down to work because you know what?

Cheetah Rivera never sleeps just because our mom vacation doesn't mean my cabaret is on vacation Is it someone to be boxer? Could I just get a be boxer? No one come on? No one can just stand here and go woo Woo-Woo-Woo-Woo-Woo-Woo-Woo No one. All right, fine. My next show is at the Carnegie Hotel No one. Alright, fine. My next show is at the Carnegie Hotel. So Margarita comes back in and she's like, we gotta go with the water's choppy. And Ramona is pissed. Like she's pissed at Margarita. Which is like the first person that anybody here has ever showed any anchor

towards anything Margarita based. Are you kidding me? No, wait. We want to stay all day and all night. This water is no rougher than any other kind of water. Have you ever wind yourself back before? Turn on the water. It's so rough. What are you gonna do? I'm gonna take a bath. Ramona's like, oh my god, I just forgot. I have a bath foot, okay? Everybody be careful, cuz I got a bath foot. Well I couldn't find my phone, so I was forced on the boat. Apparently 3pm is magic hour of waves on this boat. Thanks a lot, waves. Um, so everyone's bonding and having a good time and the water is getting rough. And then

we're off. And then we're off. And Tensley has just started to get her ret back for a girl who can throw a fun trip. She's trying to convince everybody that it's not bumpy at all and it's totally normal for Columbia. Okay. She's like, you everybody that it's not bumpy at all and it's totally normal for Columbia. Okay. She's like, you guys, it's a little bunny, it's fine. And so I'm just freaking out. And she's like, that was bad.

You have to be in Columbia 10 times. I mean, you've not been on this boat 10 times. And if you have, then why would you bring me here on this boat if you know it's like this? This is horrible. First, no Saudis. and now I'm gonna die! You don't care because you don't have a daughter. I've got a daughter back home.

I'm like, you were just showing your butthole on camera. Now, might not be the best time to be like pulling out the mother card. You know what I mean? So Tensey's like, no, you just swerved through the arc. Okay, you just swerved through it. So just screaming and yelling, and rocking back and forth through the Ramona and she's like, I'm gonna pee in my swimsuit. There, I pee it on this and she throws at it tensely space.

And they all start laughing but Sonia is like super pissed and she's like, this is like flying flying on an airplane with one propeller. I just peed my pants. It's not right. And then out of nowhere you hear Ramona go. I just peed my pants. It's not right. And then out of nowhere you hear Ramona go. Avery is my daughter. Okay? Avery is my daughter. And Tim's he's like, guys it's fine. You don't have a kid who looks just like your sister.

You don't understand, Tim's he? Okay, I do understand. I've got a dog. I get it. I'm just giving that a nice little pause for all the mothers of actual children out there who want to punch their fucking headphones right now. Okay, go ahead. Punch away. Punch away. Go ahead. Are you done? Then he cuts to Ramona going, oh, hello! I can't swim! Hey, where are I'm freaking out? Like, seriously, literally, where the life vest? Okay? Don't they install ultra-vestos. Now, I don't know what, vestos means. But if it does mean vest, she just said where are the other vests?

So, Ramona, everybody's freaking out Ramona and Sonya. Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha- flashes up on the screen and it's like the producers were forced to stop shooting because the waters were so bad. Then we get a housewives classic which is the quick clips of all the women telling one story at one time. WHISH! When we left the island we got out of the boat from hell. WHISH! Huh, we were all gonna die at sea. It was so bad even the camera stopped and they even made it through that whole Sonya Budwool scene. Whee! Flying!

Things would like... Flying! Or over the boat! Flying! Whee! Them all the sudden, were smelling smoke. And it's not just Carol as a costume party. Whee!

It was like a marathon of waves! Whee! Oh the boat! It was trying to reel it in! And that's what was causing the smell! Whee! I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I- to reel it in and that and he cuts off the anchor! Whee! Was it had it been on a chain? That boat would have capsized and I wouldn't be here to get a free room out of it! Whee! And I would have gone before Cheetah! Whee! They end the story with Ramona just like doing that little powder shimmy that she does and pounding, going like...

Bling! Bling! Bling! Pou! Kay? Pou! Pou! Kay? going like, bling, bling, bling, pow, okay? Pow, pow, okay. So next morning at breakfast, everybody is recovering and Tinsy's like, oh my God, the boat ride was super traumatic for everyone, except for me. I didn't feel it for my life,

but I can't take away how things felt. It's, it's, cracks me up because my best friends are always telling me, does Tinsy ever have a bad fucking day like is anything ever bad happen to tinsley And it's so true because tinsley always comes out smelling like I mean grap it I was gonna say smelling like a braze of course. She's got that whole wall of them behind her Then Carol reminds us that she's a journalist, okay? I've put myself in some extremely dangerous situations. Afghanistan

during that war and the Middle East during that war was nothing compared to what happened on that boat. Uh, honey. I don't know what hotel you were staying out over there, but like hundreds of thousands of people have died in that war, but okay. I anyone who doesn't have diarrhea raised your hand and she raises her hand and tinsley raises her hand because does tinsley has tinsley ever had diarrhea? No, you know she hasn't. Everybody else does. So they're all pooping. Tinsley doesn't eat and Bethany doesn't eat so they didn't get it.

And that's basically what tinsley says. So it turns out in the middle of the night Ramona was going around stealing everyone's toilet paper because she was pooping so bad Which is just so fucking Ramona and Sonya says we're out of the boat and now we're swimming in shit Oh, and by the way no offense to Columbia cuz this could happen in any country But not like this not like this This could happen in any country. But not like this.

Not like this. Mmm, this trip has not been what I wanted. Oh, you know what? We've asked, we cried, we shit. We can go now. Alright, like there's nothing keeping us here. Let's go. Ramona finally goes back to her old ways

and grabs one of the housemen to make him back for her. Because of my ankle. It was literally figuratively, and emotionally and absolute. So good. So on the way out, um, Ramona starts slipping on something and she's like, oh my god, Sonya, that's your poop.

No, it's not. Guess it is smearing on the ground under our shoes. Well, the, it's not my poop. And if it was, I would own my own poop smear, which I believe. On the car on the way home, it looks like they weren't the only ones to poop on the floor. The Wants says, Oh, well I left them the ultimate gift girls. Oh my god, the toilet you mean?

No, I'm the bad. And then sure enough, we cut back to the Luan's room where a poor maid is sponging down the poopy bed. I mean really. So that was the end of this. I cannot believe I've talked so long and I actually cannot believe that you're still here. The two of you that stayed for this entire thing, do not worry next week Ben will still

not be back but I won't be alone I'll have Katie Kizorla by my side for the next episode of Real Housewives of New York City and until then we've got a guest host every day to come make us laugh together. Okay everybody. Thank you so much for being here with me on my maiden. Voyage through solo recap, craziness. I love you guys, we will talk to you next time. Boi! Hey, prime members, you can listen to Watcher Crappens Add Free on Amazon Music, download the Amazon Music app today.

Or you can listen Add Free with Wondry Plus in Apple Podcasts before you go tell us about yourself by completing a short survey at Wondry.com slash survey. at 1dry.com slash survey.