Watch What Crappens - RHONY: Your Fish Is My Command - Live from Portland!

Episode Date: April 6, 2019

The annual "Real Housewives of New York" pilgrimage to The Berkshires is off to a great start, what with an instantly iconic squabble about Dorinda's Fish Room. Turns out The Countess requires less aquatic accommodations, and she won't be happy until she gets them. And even then she won't be happy. We recap the whole thing live from Portland, OR. Plus, we debut our new single, "GOODBYE KYLE!" See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.Our Patreon Extras: https://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Get ready for a double load of Queen of Hearts! It's me, Jujubee, and I return to guide sexy singles through some ronchy blind dates. Cameras off! Voice only! Launching during Pride, Queen of Hearts takes Miami by storm, with Daeders' Cuppe from Tampa Bayes, Just Chaz, and Brittany Brave to name a few. Follow Queen of Hearts on Amazon Music or wherever you get your podcasts. What would crappens would like to think its premium sponsors? Just sayin saying okay?

Kristi Wawerdie-Dawerdie! Jamie, she has no last namey! Ashley Savoni, she don't take no baloney! Aaron McNickolas, she don't miss no trickle-ists! Megan the Slayer Taylor, in a homer with Jeffrey Boomer! Kelly Barlow, when she goes Barlow we go high-low. Megan Berg, you can't have a burger without the bird Ain't no thing like Allison King hot dang. It's Jessica dang. Sarah Greenwood she only uses her power for good

Hannah God, I love that banana Anderson of a Nagila Webber Lisa Wallent Now that's what I call wallentainment the Bay Area Betches Betches and our super premium Patreon subscribers. Give them hell, Miss Noel. Lulu Simon. Sue. Sue Studio. How they grant? The grant master. Let's get Racy with Miss Stacy.

Shannon out of a cannon Anthony. Incredible edible Matthew sisters. And... Mina Kuchikuchi Kuchikuchi. Good bye, Cole! Watch what crap is. Watch what crap is watch what crap is Who cares what happens when there's so much that happens I've been

I tried to crack this, but I just want happens, but there's so much that's happened. It's a problem. I tried to crack this, but there's so much that's happened. Yay! Oh my God! Damn, you guys turned out for a bunch of tree hugging hippies. Thank you so much. Portland. Oh my God.

Man, you don't let this seasonal depression affect your asses at all. Whoa. I get rains every day of my life. I don't even give a fuck. I'm going to enjoy my life. I don't even give a fuck. I'm gonna enjoy my life Your beautiful city. Oh my god Loving Portland look I got my I got my powells bookstores shirt I'm wearing what I got for Portland on my body my actual body the food here. Oh my god. Oh my god the man here

I thought you guys were gonna be a bunch of tree hug and hippies yeah and You know you're tricky you're tricky about it Because the guys here like I don't save I'm like yeah, but you trimmed that shit for three hours today, sir Okay because the guys here are like, I don't shave. I'm like, yeah, but you trimmed that shit for three hours today, sir. Okay. It's true. Wow. This is actually our third time in the Pacific Northwest, the past like four months, four or five months.

You guys are awesome. Wow, well, you guys are a great audience every time. We actually have some of the premium and super premium sponsors here. Yeah. We have the incredible edible Matthews sisters. And we also have. Can't have the burger without the burger.

Miss Megan Megan. And we have one very confused straight man right here in the front row. Bless your heart, my little head twig. What? Oh, he's gay. He's not our team. He's butch. Never mind.

We're not looking at you anymore. All right. Oh. Gave men our nice to each other. Oh, there's a straight guy. What a week to be a Bravo fan, right? What a whizman. It has been so good all week. This episode, I mean this episode of Revenge was in New York has been amazing. We finally got our good boy, come on!

Yes, good boy, come on! Which is just swept the nation. Yeah. Sweeped it. And we've never done this at a show before, really, at our homes, either. Yeah, it does one thing we've never ever done. So, for the first time ever, we've written a song for an honor of Beverly Hills. Shall we start?

Do it. Okay. You're not a real friend, Kyle. You're not a good friend, you're part of the gang. Kyle and the gang, Kyle. Out of the gang. I got a friend. I got a friend. I got a friend. You're not a the game Car in the game car Car in the game car I got a friend I got a friend

And I got a good soil friend Good bye Kyle! Good bye Kyle Good bye Kyle Good bye Kyle Good bye Kyle Good bye Kyle Get out of my fucking house I call! Good bye Kyle! Good bye Kyle! Good bye Kyle! Good bye Kyle! Good bye Kyle!

Good bye Kyle! Good bye Kyle! Good bye Kyle! Good bye Kyle! Good bye Kyle! Good bye Kyle! Good bye Kyle! Good bye Kyle!

Good bye Kyle! Good bye Kyle! Good bye Kyle! Good bye Kyle! Good bye Kyle! Good bye Kyle! Good bye Kyle! Good bye Kyle!

Good bye Kyle! Good bye Kyle! Good bye Kyle! Good bye Kyle! Good bye Kyle! Good bye Kyle! Good bye Kyle! Goodbye Kyle! Go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go I'm just telling you what the general consensus is and everyone thinks you care about your image more than you do, your friendships. Goodbye Carl! Goodbye Carl! Goodbye Carl!

Goodbye Carl! Goodbye Carl! Goodbye Carl! Goodbye Carl! Good by car, good by car, good by car. Thank you so much. I mean. Soon to be climbing the charts, song of the summer. Erica Jane, who am I right?

I'm sitting behind the table, but I was patting my purse the whole time. I was patting the fupa the entire time. And now for my friend, Tito, I'd like to welcome you to the stage. Yes! Do you know what it's like waiting an entire day to drink? You don't look like an alcoholic. Oh, sip it up. Daring it is.

Mmm. You guys, I mean, goodbye Kyle's fun, but this New York episode, this is the first time we've ever gotten to do a Berkshire's episode live, so... And so much good happened in the real housewives of New York in real life this week. Ramona's informational, have you guys seen that? Oh. If you haven't seen it, I think we can... Basically, here's what it was.

So Ramona has a new skin care thing I called Ageless. Ageless by Ramona? Hsinger, okay? Okay, Ageless. He's in Duke. Whoa. Bethany says I don't even have a product. Well, guess what?

I have an infomercial, and it's called Ageless, right? This is a real commercial. This is not us coming up with another good biocyle song. This is a real commercial. It might as well be. Our song we did in five minutes. Yeah. And I think that took like five times the amount that it took. Yeah. Ramona, do you think got this commercial?

Like, remember when Cher used to do like skin care commercials in the 90s? That's it. It's like now Ramona is now Ramona's doing like the same couch and everything like She has something called ageless and she is she's literally talking about I don't even know what it is But she at one point she goes You lose your collagen Three I'm sorry Sorry But your collagen is gone.

Okay? That's what I always tell my best friend slash daughter, Ivory, your collagen's about to go away. Treasurer, nah. It's gone. It's gone. 23, you lose it. Yeah, good bye collagen.

Good bye collagen. Good bye, collagen. Good bye, collagen. Good bye, collagen. Uh. I'm trying to think what else you said in this information. You should call it when you're 23. I mean, it's crazy. Okay, use this cream. It's elastic. Make your face elastic.

I'm like, what are you even fucking talking about right now, Runa? Uh. Keep your pants up. It's like, what are you saying right now? I'm gonna have to borrow one of them. I'm gonna have to borrow one of them. I'm gonna have to borrow one of them. I'm gonna have to borrow one of them. I'm gonna have to borrow one of them. I'm gonna have to borrow one of them. I'm gonna have to borrow one of them.

I'm gonna have to borrow one of them. I'm gonna have to borrow one of them. I'm gonna have to borrow one of them. I'm gonna have to borrow one of them. I'm gonna have to borrow one of them. I'm gonna have to borrow one of them. I'm gonna have to borrow one of them. I'm gonna have to borrow one of them. I'm gonna have to a gin and toilet. A vodka soda, remember? A vodka soda. Yeah, it's like, this is great. I'm gonna make vodka soda right now.

I'll be right back. Watch out. Watch out, Chrissy T.I. Jan. Here we go. You take a glass of soda and you pour some vodka in it and my little trick is I cut a little wedge lime and put it on top. Wala. It's ainseless it, and my little trick is I cut a little wedge lime and put it on top. Wala, it's a useless.

They focus soda. It's a useless vodka soda. By the way, you know, far be it from me to shame somebody on their looks. But when you do it to yourself, it's open season, okay? She's doing an a useless commercial. One of her eyes, not we've seen the Botox eye. You know what I'm gonna say. We all know the Botox pirate eye, okay?

Half of us have it in the Saudi. Let's be honest. I'm like, this is not a show for spring chickens. We all know what the Botox does to you, okay? When you get too much, it makes one your eyes close. So not only does she have the chiali, the goodbye chiali, she has one eye half close. So not only does she have the chiali the goodbye chiali She has one when I have class but not only is the half-close is twitching so it's going like this

Um Her nose has just been redone one of her nostrils doesn't open which I've never seen before and we've seen Michael Jackson's nose fall off I mean it's amazing. And this is when you choose to come out with your ages commercial. You gotta fucking love it. But that wasn't the only thing Ramona singer did this week. Ronnie, literally right before, like I'm telling you, this is the most productive five minutes we ever had.

The stage manager was like, do you mind if we start five minutes late? We're like, sure, we wrote a song. And then Ronnie showed me this clip of Ramona Singer doing virtual reality. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh my God, it's dinosaurs. You know? No, it was like a living room, okay. It was a virtual reality of a living room. She was basically like this. She's like, you have a new seat up.

Whoa. It's like there's a floor beneath my feet. I feel the floor. It's a real floor. Whoa. But it's a little cup of tea. I'm gonna have some tea. Is that Mario?

Is that Mario? It's a little cup of tea. I want to have some tea. Is that Mario? Is that Mario? It's a real life Mario. Touching it. Touching it. Whoa, it's a chair. I want to sit in the chair. Whoa. I thought it was a real chair.

I thought it was a real chair. What kind of said did you give Ramona a chair and some tea? Get that bitch in Jurassic Park. and some tea. Good that bitch in Jurassic Park. Nidja finds a way, okay? So stupid. Cleva? Okay, that's enough exercise for me.

Literally. She would be scaring those velociraptors away. They'd be like, do you want to go for her They'd be like, you want to go for her? No, no, let's just go for her the other one. And then we're coming out with our Game of Thrones podcast. Our Game of Thrones podcast next week. Oh, yeah.

So we've been working on some theme music for it. And then we did this video on Instagram today. We worked on it today instead of going outside, because you know I'm not doing that shit. So we did the Vanderpump rules opening as Game of Thrones faces, you know. Yeah. I'm literally out of breath.

Yeah. I'm doing... It's like a adrenaline and like doing... People at home, I literally stood up. That's all I did. Ronnie did an amazing, he composed an amazing theme song for the New Game of Thrones episodes. Oh, you're here and see her.

Thank you. So we worked together today He did an amazing, he composed an amazing theme song for the new Game of Thrones episodes. Oh, you're here and see her. Thank you. So, we, you know, we worked together today and we were making this video for Vanderpump rules and we're like, who is, are the people from Game of Thrones? Yeah. Trying to match the people. We're about to throw all of them. But, um, Ben, I said, who's Hodor?

We can't make Katie Hodor, right? Because she's a white walker. She's a white walker. She's a white walker. She's a white walker. She's a white walker. Maddie Shamers, which is not because of that, but also Katie's evil goes way deeper. So she's a white walker. Yeah.

Yeah. But that left us Hodor, and we were like, who is, who's like the big dodo bird on Game of Thrones? Um. How do I, I, been laughing my neck off all day. Are you saying hold the door? No, I'm saying hold the door. You. Hold the door. Hold it. Right, it door. Right, right, right. Oh, we got it. You're engaged. No, I'm saying hold the door.

We're talking about the door. Ha, ha, ha. Uh. OK. We are here to recap and ask you to talk about the purchase. So let's talk about the purchase. All right. We will do it.

We just had to share the door. Oh, no, I wanted to tell you one more thing. So normally, I judge a town based on, like, the five feet that I will do it. We just had to share the joy. Oh, no, I wanted to tell you one more thing. So normally I judge a town based on like the five feet that I walk in it. Yeah. Which is usually the smoking area of the hotel. So I was out there today. This is true.

It's not a lie. I'm bored because I want to see like hippies. I want to see people protesting like we passed a building that's painted with resist. I'm like, yes, Portland. Yeah, I love you. Yeah. So, I'm just standing out there like bored and this lady, this really pretty lady with two men walk spine. She's like,

well, you know, Bob hates when people say, I'm American. I mean, who does that? And I was like, okay, this is what I wanted to see your point. He You fucking crazy Portland. I feel like I've... Who says that? I feel like I've seen like three women and three guys who all have like Joan J. Harris got hair so I said I love that. That's my favorite part.

This town is my jam. It's the kids say. Okay, guess what? Now we're going to recap. Nepsud, Real Housewives of New York City. Yeah. What now we're gonna recap an episode real housewives New York City. Yeah So one thing that I loved I thought you were giving up to tell me something just paying attention to you I know it's rare but One thing that I love it was that like I don't know if anyone noticed this but on the on the previously on real

Houses of New York they showed it, you hear Beth and you go, what's going on, what's the matter, what's happening? I was like, she literally just said it. She just said it. Did you hear that? Did she actually said it? Yeah, we've been doing this long enough that we actually think that we come up with things.

We don't. We just repeat what is being done in front of us, you know? Like, oh my God, can you believe how good by Kyle was taking off? Like, you did not write good by Kyle, you idiot. Yeah. You idiot. So the episode truly opens, I just had to say that because I was very excited about it.

But the episode opens with Dale and Tinsley walking along. And the first thing here is Dale go, Tinsley, I'm concerned about this, I don't want to change the shape of your jaw. Tinsley, you've got your father's jaw, I have no idea in the world why you'd want to change the shape of your jaw. Tensley, you've got your father's jaw. I have no idea in the world why you'd want to change it. Who doesn't want to look like your father? Tensley, you've got a nice big square jaw. Nonsense.

Manly and husband-repellent. I like it. It's not like top is wife. She has a nice feminine jaw, but yours is nice to you. Remember when we were at the FedEx trying to send some things, and that nice woman tried to send a Lego set in your jaw? That who wouldn't want that jaw, tinsley? And ass square jaw.

So she's like, you're talking too much, mother. Ah! We're talking so much! So the latest, the latest like plague that is beset, tinsley is that she has massive TMJ. I like that you call it a plague, I call it a co-cubic sin. How is this? Sorry.

Sorry, but bin bear. OK. Wait, can you get TMJ from Coke? Yes. You're like, you're like, ugh. Do you guys? Hello. Do you not remember Jack's going to get this procedure last month?

Fair, fair, fair. Don't you remember? Jack's like, no, I'm just really stressed. I'm like, yeah, I would be too. Flush your nose. Oh, my jaw. So, so Tinsley is, she's going to be emceeing an event coming up and she's

talking to Dale about this like, strut your mind event. And she's like, talking about it. And you just see Dale staring at Tinsley like, my goodness, she does have such a square jaw. It's like, it's like looking at Iron Man right there. My poor baby. He's got a huge show.

Can I get SpongeBob a discount, Doctor? It doesn't help that the doctor is totally in love with Dale too and they're just flirting, right? The doctor's like, hello, and they're like, ha ha ha, you. Oh, hilarious, doctor. You are hilarious. He's like, you're beautiful, what are your sisters?

And Jim's like, gaw, no! He's like, all I meant is that you look like two beautiful, septogenarian women. I'm gonna say. So, doctor, I don't understand what you'll do in here, beautiful, sceptigenery, and women. So Doctor, I don't understand what you're doing here, but I'm assuming we're here to get Botox for Tinsley's eggs, because Lord knows they're old. And in case you were confused, I'm Dale Mercer, the mother, huh? So, Tim is just, Dale just bullies Tim's leech through this entire episode.

I fucking love Dale. Dale is like absolutely amazing. I think we've always enjoyed her, but I feel like this is the season where I'm like, why is Dale not an actual housewife also? I mean, Ramona already hates her MF to be a regular housewife. So, Tim's leley's nervous because she's going to be emceeing this strut your mutt, like dog charity

show. And she tells us, she's like, oh, the fashion show component is a baby step. At which point, I swear to God, I thought Carol was going to burst into me like, baby step. She's doing this to hurt me. What? That's what I call a baby step is what I call the marathon. She's doing this to hurt me. Wow! That's what I call a baby step is what I call the marathon!

Ha! Ha! She just recedes out of the office. What was that? It was just a baby step because it's's gonna get me back in New York City. Tensley, this is your third season. Another real house size of New York City. You're back in New York City, too.

I know. Okay. How many housewarming so you gonna have, bitch? Yeah, Batman can only return once. So the more things I do like this, the closer I get to my old life. Like you're in the wrong time machine. She's like clawing her way back to her old life.

Through doggy fashion shows. Like that Tincy Mortimer, I'm not sure about her. Wait, she's doing a doggy fashion show. A dog show. Bringer into high society. I mean, was it sponsored by the Staten Island Fairy or was it just very close by the Staten Island Ferry or was it just very close to the Staten Island thing?

Now, Tinsley Mortimer, before we accept your application into this building co-op, have you hosted any doggy fashion shows recently? Oh, I tried to. All right. So, Tinsley's like, well, I'm here, would you freeze my forehead? It's moving! Look at that, that moves.

And he's like, but what if you become frightened? You don't want your face to reflect the fact that you're frightened. She's like, no! No! If I'm frightened, I'll just fall down on the floor! So, this is going to hurt, right? And he goes, no, it's just going to feel the floor! Oh, no. So, and she says, this is gonna hurt, right? And she goes, no, it's just gonna feel like a bunch of little sticks. And they all go, that's gonna hurt.

That's gonna hurt. I'll tell you one thing, top is wife. She can take pain like a champ. She is great. She is great. Doesn't even need Botox. She can move her jaw like nobody's business. She has dog and cat fashion shows. Most beautiful baby I've ever seen.

So then they make some deinevitable balls on Tinsley's, you know, holding balls, because he's like, here's some stressed balls and she's like, Oh my God, balls! She's like, doctor, you want to take this one or should I? Mercer girls love bowtocks and we certainly have used bowtocks and every conceiver of space. Talk about my vagina tins. No!

I'm there! Let's face it, it's time for commercial break. I'm sorry, I'm sorry, but if don't take one, it's gonna be very day class set, okay? Celebrity beef, you never know if you're just gonna end up on TMZ or trending on Twitter or in court. I'm Matt Bellasive. And I'm Sydney Battle, and we're the host

of Wonder Woman's new podcast, Dis and Tell. Each episode explores a different iconic celebrity feud, from the build-up, why it happened, and the repercussions. What does our obsession with these feud say about us? We're starting off with a pretty messy love triangle between Selena Gomez and Justin and Haley Bieber. A seemingly innocent TikTok of Selena talking about her laminated eyebrows. It snowballed into a full-blown alleged feud.

But it doesn't seem like fans are letting up anytime soon. Despite both Selena and the Bieber's making public statements denying any bad blood. How much of this is teen jealousy and lovers quarreling, and how much of it is a carefully crafted narrative designed to sell albums. Follow this and tell wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen ad-free on the Amazon Music or Wondering Out. Okay, so then we go over to Ramona and Sonia walking in Sonia's front yard, which is some random park or whatever, Central Park, I guess.

So which isn't even a burn, because no one has a front yard in New York City. I'm like, oh yeah, burn! I don't even have a front yard, it's just central park. What a loser. So she goes on the park. Sonia's wearing some sort of like, you know, noise canceling headphones. And her mom is like, whoa, what are those things?

You've never seen them before. The future is now. First virtual reality. Oh, what are those things? I've never seen them before. The future is now. The first virtual reality. And then earmuffs that make noise. I can't wait to ride my horse around the city and tell everybody about this crazy new invention. Sonya's like, oh, you know,

these cut out the sound noise. And I love that she came up with a phrase sound noise. Oh, I'm gonna actually disassist them. She looks at them and she's like, well, I have wireless. Like they are wireless, you asshole. She's such a dick. And somebody's like, these are wireless.

You know, now that I moved them trying new things. She's like, well, you know, the new apartment, now that I live in Columbus Circle, I mean, I feel like I'm at a rave all the time, and I just had like this image of Sonia Morgan in a rave in the 90s, except she was like in the middle of traffic. Like, yeah. Oh, it just reminds me of being in those raids again. Ramona's like, Hey, I had a blind date, okay? Ramona, I'm not wearing them anymore.

Okay, talk to me now. So she's like, I had a blind date, by the way. She's like, blind, blind, blind. I mean, he's not blind. You know, I've seen, I can barely see him because my whole face is doing this whole time. Whoa, whoa, Whoa. Whoa. Whoa. Whoa. Whoa.

He speaks three languages and he's very woebly. That's so... He's very wordly, she said. I was like, what a... Is this a new game? He's like, he's very wordly. He's very words with France, okay? And send your guys, oh, so he's ugly.

Check. He's like... He's like, ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah!

Ah! How did you know that was red, Sonya? Whoa. So yeah, especially the guys, ugly, and so Ramona's like, you know what? You know what? I'm into sex. I'll admit it. I'm into hot sex.'ll admit it. I mean, to hot sex.

Someone like can rip off his clothes. Just want to rip off his clothes, take oil, and rub down his chest from behind, okay? Just want to be like Mario, Mario, Mario. Do not ever try that dance at home. That was horrifying. I will never forget that. Yeah, that was like sexy or something... This is her sexy massage stance.

She's like this. Whoa. Whoa. I have wireless. Why this? Sonny is like, she's like a date monster. I mean, I'm not. I just say tired, busy, have things to do.

Got a business, career woman. Like, since when? Who the fuck are you? Sonny. So they have like this really warped perception of reality because they start talking about the reality. got a business, career woman, like since when, who the fuck are you? So I know. So they have like this really warped perception of reality because they started talking about the lunch that Luanne and Durinda and Bethany had last week. And they're saying, yeah, we heard it went well,

which, no. And so I was like, oh, so Durinda's feeling great. I was like, when Durinda, last time we saw Durinda, she was kicking Barbara out of her apartment. She's like, she's the best place to see her in a long time, so I'm saying, it's the best place to ever see her. She's so great. She's so great.

Whoa, I'm so happy, because now we can gel. Yeah, gel is a group, and I think that like, right now, right now. Now. In this moment. Right now. Right now. Wait, hold on. Do-do-do-do.

Right now, OK? Right now. Hey, Sonia, are you listening to Van Halen? Right now. Right now. Right in this moment. Now. Now. Right now! Right, in this moment. Now? Now. I think that I'm good.

We don't. Wait, hold on for it. Hold on. See this son. We're just sun putting the shadow. Oh wait, hold on. It's almost there. Son is moving.

Son is moving. Now. Right now. Right now. Right now. I'm good with everyone, which is hilarious, because Ramona has never been good with anyone. It's like, so I'm ready for the bookshers now.

Okay, I'm ready to go. Right now, I'm fine. Let's go right now, right now. And I feel like... I'm crossing the blue teeth headphones. Like, and then the producers then give us an extended montage of like the Berkshire's Grace hits which to me it feels like the Oscars and like we're watching the

nominees for Best Picture. It's like first we have like Heather trying to feed Bethany Hamis like you want some Hamis you want some Hamis? I'll be up the floor like I can't I'll be up the floor like I can't I'll be like I can't. I'm enjoying them. I got you, baby! And then my favorite, my favorite karaoke song they play at these parties, Bethany's screaming at somebody. Yeah, I have been great. Fuck, I've been one time.

You, no! Stand off! Mention all! Mention all! You stole my haircut. Also, we've been, the whole world, by the way, has been misquoting Durinda the whole time. Did you guys notice this?

She says, by the way, she's holding a bottle of vodka bigger than my head, and I have a big head. She's like, I could go say, I got back to my head. I did it nice! Well, to be fair, she then muttered like 10 different times I made it nice. Oh, she did? Okay. I thought I had a gotcha moment.

That means nothing. You know, this is my favorite kind. We've been doing it wrong. Nope. Okay, move on, move on. We've found that never happened. It's important that facts are always like. And then Ramona went,h and he's like,

Man, she made it all. Ramona was saying, you were topless. You had sex on a water bed. Ha ha ha ha. You had sex with a woman. I mean, there's nothing wrong with any of those things. But you were on a water bed. The strangers, like theest nouns make their way

into real houses, New York, like that whole like tom that I guess you know, it's kind of all the fact that there was like an element where Ramona was like, yeah, I knew we went on a date, in that words, you taught me backgammon. That's like, it's like madlipses going on, like backgammon's in this, water beds. So then, you know, all the crazy things

that have happened in the Berkshires, and Sony was like, it's like having a baby. You say never again, and then there you go, having another baby. Oh, production tells you you're having a baby again. So, so now we have another baby. What the fuck is Sony talking about? That's the only one baby. So does Ram What the fuck is so new talking about? That's the only one baby.

So does Ramona. What are these bitches talking about? Her to be fair, her slippers are sort of like her baby. Listen. Listen. I was like, do it. Go ahead. Like listen. I'll just sit back here. This is a super fun scene. Been taking away. So Bethany. So Bethany is at home and she's going to go visit a new guy

that she's dating up in Boston. And she has a really pressing question for really all of us, which is, so I bring a two ton watch or so I have it all together, so I have two ton watch and I'm like, what's the matter? What's going on? Her poor assistant. It's just what's the matter? What's going on? Her poor assistant. It's just what's the matter? What's going on?

What's happening? Are not even there. I don't know where they went. They're probably with pickles and hell somewhere. Just like we should never have worked. They're fled. They fled. They got out of there.

But now we have Meg. And Beth needs to start her giant cloths. Like, Chav, it's you ton lost? I mean, what's happened? They got a little, a little, a little, a little, a little, a little, a little, the gold. And so what, what should I have asked so much money? Like, I literally can't believe it. I have a two ton lost. I mean, what's happening? I have gold. I have the gold. And the gold.

What's it I have asked so much money? I literally can't believe it. I have a map. Like how many Jews I have? I have the cuff. I have the shorts. I have the shakes. I have the one.

What do I have? I've been tuned to baby and gold. I've been tuned to baby and gold. What do I think? I've been tuned to baby and gold. What do I think? What do I think wear on this day? Should I put a bridge?

And the poor assistant who makes a Starbucks today, you know that's her pay. And the assistant's like, I've packed your skinny girl jeans for you. I'm like, OK, we got it. We got it. So, every day, he lifts the Boston. I was like, oh, I cannot wait until we get to the scene

where you give Tinsley shit for her boyfriend not being anywhere around. Yeah. Oh, wait. Oh, wait, I cannot wait until we get to the scene where you give Tinsley shit for her boyfriend not being anywhere around. Yeah. Oh, wait. Oh, wait, man. So, you know, now, I'm not gonna make fun of Bethany grieving, because it's, did she want to do something terrible? Disgusting. Who lives like that? But...

This grief counselor, this grief counselor comes over Dr. Norman fried or freed or whatever His got that like he's doing that. Yes, he's doing that like receding molething where like His ball, but he's like still you're wrong out in the back. He's like, oh, I I'm Dr. Norman fry Hi there, you know, I don't want my utter fuck over of Michelle Fyfer to affect our session today. Yeah. Really, really sorry it went down my fingers. I'm so glad I could take a break from buying into new Corvettes and getting my Europeans

and cheating on my wife for you. I've just gotten back from screw talks and I'm ready to talk. Turns out that's not a new frozen yoga brand. So Bethany tells us about her new guy, her new, our new guy. It might as well be the way that we act. We're dating him too. Look, I have not chosen for you to date this man yet, okay? So she's talking about her new guy.

I'm just gonna see where it goes. You know what I mean? It's like a courtship, all right? This guy is pursuing me. I'm a lady, makes me feel great. This guy, he's there. I'm here, he's coming towards me. It's offering me things.

What am I gonna say? No. You're gonna be like, what if I put it in a table and you just say, what if I put it in a table and you just say, what if I put it in a table and you just say, what if I put it in a table and you just say, what if I put it in a table and you just say,

what if I put it in a table and you just say, what if I put it in a table and you just say, what if I put it in a table and you just say, what if I put it in a table and you just say, what if I put it in a table and you just say, what if I put it in a table and you just say, what if I put it in a table and you just say, what if I put it in a table and you just say, what? I'm not doing anything from the wedding. Okay, like, at least after a few years of the year. I think we're in free. What do you think we're in free? What does he can say?

What does he can say? Okay. What does he can say? What does he can say? Okay. So, so Bethany is understandably having really weird feelings about doing someone else, because she had a lot of,

we hear a lot of mixed feelings about what happened at the end. You want some water? A snack. You want water? A snack? Do you want a snack? I want a snack. I want a snack. I want some water? It's not. Do you want some water? Do you want some water? I have forks. There's no forks here.

I could be good if you want tips. You want nuts? I got nuts. You want nuts? You want nuts? You want nuts? You want nuts? Got that.

The doctor's just like, yeah. Can we just talk? You know? So sit down, Bethany. Here's what I love. Because Bethany has like, it's a very emotional scene. She's crying. She's sort of like going through all these mixed emotions.

And one of the primary thing is that like, she's getting someone new and she feels guilty about that, et cetera. And so the grief counselor says, you know what, loving someone else is a testament to the love that you had with Dennis. And she's like, what are you talking about? What?

What's that mean? What are you talking about? What do you crazy about? What does that mean? What does that mean? The testament to the new guy. I love Dennis so much. I'm fucking some guy from Boston. What's that mean? What do you mean? What do you crazy stuff is? That doesn't make sense. What is that? What does that mean? I'm just a man, it's a new guy. I love Dennis so much.

I'm fucking some guy from Boston. Whoa. Yeah. I'm just like, you know what it's Gravestone? It's fucked up. I who are you? Get the fuck out of my house. Get the fuck out.

Forget my code. Forget my code. I just love that even in like her most tragic moment, she can still just be totally Bethany, you know? Yeah, and did you notice it behind her while this whole big dramatic scene is going on? She has this giant statue in her home. I'm pretty sure it's a snake eating itself.

Is that what it is? I think it's snake eating its tail, yeah. Yeah, yeah, I think Dorenda got that for her. Ooh. I did it. I found a snake. I think I let me try the jelly. So now it's time for Strut Your Mutt,

the big doggy fashion show happening in New York. Oh God, did Tinsley come out of the dog van? I brought it. Tins, man. Thank you, man. Thank you, man. Thank you, man. Thank you, man. Thank you, man. Thank you, man. Thank you, man. Thank you, man. Thank you, man. Thank you, man. Thank you, man.

Thank you, man. Thank you, man. Thank you, man. Thank you, man. Thank you, man. Thank you, man. Thank you, man. Thank you, man.

Thank you, man. Thank you, man. Thank you, man. Thank you, man. Thank you, man. Thank you, man. Thank you, man. Thank you, man. Thank you, man. Thank you, man. like it just came over the hell. It's just like, it's just like Jim Caron Jeff Dan is like, mock, ing, bird, birds, oh, hey, Chowty.

So, Dells with her, and we see Kelly, her publicist friend, who's really getting Tinzy back on the road with this Strat your much cell or whatever. And Dells like, oh, Kelly, how I've always wanted to meet you, darling. Thank you for helping these muts and for enabling my mutt. I appreciate that.

You're so beautiful and young and fertile, just like top is wife. You smell delicious. Is that the smell of work and eggs? Is that the smell of potential? I? Is that the smell of potential? I haven't smelled it in so long. I'm also happy to report that Bambi, which is Tinsy's dog, was back in the self-possessed rib sweater, which is my favorite thing.

I love that sweater. And here we are with another rescue dog. Are you Bambi, the dog? Someone is f- Oh my god, it's Bambi, too, please., are you Bambi the dog? Someone is banning. Oh my God, it's Bambi, too, please. Someone dresses Bambi. Hilarious. And she's shivering.

Indorable. She's shivering. I'm not sure if that's Bambi or Tinsley, but I like it. So. Second dog rescue story of the week on Bravo, by the way. Yeah. Notice how differently this is handled. So Dorenda shows up, but they like Dorenda. We got this dog for you, whatever. of the week on Bravo, by the way. Notice how differently this is handled.

So Dorenda shows up, but they like Dorenda. We got this dog fear whatever. And Dorenda is like, yeah, she's great. Yeah, my dog just died like two days ago. They're like, what? You know, she was 15 years old. Hey, you know what happened? She's jacked away.

And it was Sally, Sally. You know, she didn't get on the couch. And I'm thinking, you know. I look up and riches there. Yeah. Wishing to see people with tattoos. He's there. I said, you better back it up, Richard.

I'm watching Lord Aura. I'm watching Lord Aura, OK? Was I the one you even did dog with the film? Was I the one who felt like there never was a dog. I thought it was a dog. I thought it was a dog. I thought it was a dog. I thought it was a dog. I thought it was a dog. I thought it was a dog. I thought it was a dog.

I thought it was a dog. I thought it was a dog. I thought it was a dog. I thought it was a dog. I thought it was a dog. I thought it's very sad. God. Sorry, my fan figured it out a little bit of dark. Hey. So they're all there. Oh, so they're a remodeling.

Remona shows up. Dale is sitting there holding band- Or a remona doesn't show up. And Dorenda is just like, Hey, remona. Hey. So Dale is sitting there holding band- like Dale is right by the stairs,

right to greet like every cast member to have her moment. A Ramona shows up like, whoa, you're right, yeah? I'm just going to walk by this strange lady who looks like the mom from who's the boss. Ha. Ha. Ha Ramona. Ha.

Ha. Ha. Ha. Ha. Ha. Ramona. I, ha, ha, ha, ha, Ramona. I had to grab my die coke. I had visions of it falling in my computer. What a bitch. Oh my god. What a monster. What a treasure. What a treasure.

Bits treasure. Okay? What a bitch treasure. Bits your diving. I'm diving for Bits treasure. What are What a bitch treasure. It's just diving. I'm diving for bitch treasure. What are you diving for? What a monster. Dale is so nice. I mean, not to Tinsley, but to everybody else. And she has been this now two weeks in a row. And she's just like, uh, but when it comes to monsters on Real House of New York, there's only one real monster this season. My favorite monster Three two whoa I did the mash. I did the Countess mash God bless Luan Luan gives us something new every season and this year it's monster Luan and I'm totally here for it It's in things like thank you so much for coming

and I'm totally here for it. And since he's like, thank you so much for coming, man. Thank you. Oh, hi. I'm like, oh, of course, I'm glad to be here. I mean, one thing I haven't been a member of in a very long time is an audience. So I'm just happy that there was time in between my aberrations

to come to your adorable little event. Have you noticed that when Louan gets like this, she's been doing it for years, but when she turns into this evil monster, Louan, she literally puts her head up and she sucks in her cheekbones and then yes. And shakes her head, she goes like this. Mm.

Huh. You would too if you're living around house So so the way is there so during throw golf balls if you live in the brunt in the round house, I'm alright So Durinda is trying really hard now to be nice. She's like, oh, no, I'm so excited You're gonna come to the Berkshire's early and then you see like Ramona and Sonia and turns you nodding like, yeah, we're so excited, bitch. And then the man goes, well, I'll be coming from my Hampton's estate. So I'll be there anyway.

She said, I'm coming from my house upstate. Oh, how have you been all for three days? I've been telling Ben, oh, I'm sorry, I'm coming from my Hampton's estate. I thought you were trying to start a joke. No. I literally thought it was a huge thing. I was just curious at Luan.

But Luan's fine, she's done nothing wrong. But the thing is, it's still funny every time you said, I'm going with my Hampton's estate, it's still funny and she still would do that. Yeah. But I thought I was going to be there anyway. It's like a thanks. But I just like see this, what I think is hilarious

is that she's bragging about having a house in Upstate New York. Oh, well, I'm coming from my house of state. It's like congratulations. It's also like four million, I don't know. People live in that county, too. I'm not. This is a woman who doesn't know the difference

between West Palm Beach and Palm Beach. Oh. True. Now we know. So Luangos, what I see during this eyes light up, it warms my heart. But then Barbara told me about getting thrown out of apartment. Oh.

And then I'm very upset that we don't have Barbara this episode. So I'm really glad that they at least gave us a Barbara clip of Barbara talking to Luana and Barbara saying, you know, I was invited to this thing and they hamptit, should I go to the barction? What should I, what are you doing with someone kick you out of there? What's it the light bulbs? What did I say? I feel like I should be there, because I'm always told I'm the life of the party. So then, Durinda, who just forgets shit that happened five minutes ago, you know, like me, she's like Looking at this great guy, he's gonna be naked! Yes, thank you!

You're gonna be naked, Chef! Who's gonna be naked? He's gonna be naked! Like, I'm pretty sure he's gonna come cook, Link. It's like nothing you've ever seen before in the past 11 months. You've never seen it. You've never seen it. Am I doing this happen?

This was like last year, right? I was gonna make it, chef. I mean, was this the episode that Dorinda stabbed herself on the hand because she was so wasted? No, that was actually a separate episode. That was the episode where Dorinda shoved her face yourself on the hand because she was so wasted. No, that was actually a separate episode. That was the episode where Durinda shoved her face into a cake that had light candles in it.

I love that that's how we can mark New York episodes. What happened to drunk ass Durinda during that episode? For those of you because I know there are some people here who have never seen this show show We really hope this entices you enough to start watching it because it's it's like the most amazing shit that's ever been on television So then she's like, you know, maybe we know that like an egg decoration By the way, if we guys to tell you guys I'm having the nation's safety team, but we know. It's really like Valentine's Day, Port de Rindas decorating for Halloween, everything. Sulao, I was like, well, you know, dog smog and everything.

We're going to your friend's bow, don't we, Romona? And Romona's like, oh, yeah, my friend has a boat and he stalked right around the corner. So she invited us all of us, all of us, all of us. Damn, just like, just like, all right, I don't know. I'll hold you. Food and drinks and drink everything. I can't get going, you can't go any biggie, silly.

You're going to be like going out in the kitchen. It's going to be crazy. I've got a huge surprise for you girls. It rhymes with meth with my clothes on. No. Make a check. So, yeah. So they're going to go.

So, Luann and Sonia go to get some coffee and now Ramona and Durrinda are talking and now they're angry at Barbara because they feel like everything would be fine with Durrinda and Luann to the Barbara is an outside voice that's getting in the way. Which is true, but it's like an outside voice that's saying true things. You know what I mean?

It's like an intro to the woods when they kill the narrator. It's like, why are you killing him? He didn't do it. I don't know. I think it's like an outside voice like at the airport. You know when you're at the airport it's like the red curve is for unloading and loading. I may have built a blindsio. If you see something say something. Please don't forget to put on your seatbelts in this New York City taxi. Take it away, Arita. So now- It just never changed the voiceover.

It's Barbara. Hi, I'm Barbara for the MTA. Enjoy your trip. So, ugh. So now it's time for the big runway show. Oh, I'm so sorry. Oh, no, it's fine. No, because I'm Oh, I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. Oh, no, it's fine. Because I'm never going to leave this scene.

I loved it. Oh. OK, so we're going to... So Luhan walks away in Ramona, because... She's in good spirits. You know, you've... that's so rude. Well, because all this season, every time Luhanna's seen Ramona, she's been like, get the, that's so rude. Well, because all this season, every time Lwanda's seen Ramona,

she's been like, get the fuck out of my face. It's just a terminology, spirits, you know? It's like the poor woman's in alcohol, and she's battling alcoholism, it's like, oh look at her over there. Well, you know, she puts them on a martini. It's like, why are you saying stuff like that, you know? She's really drunk on power.

So, It's like, why are you saying stuff like that, you know? She's really drunk on power. So... So now... You see, Luanche looks real thirsty, you know? It's like, don't just don't say things like that. I mean, the Luan Ramona friendship has just become... It's just evolved into one of the most amazing things because all they do is undermine each other, including now when it's about time, this runway moment, and Luan goes,

Oh, Ramona, this is your moment to kill it on the runway. Finally! At Ramona it's like, whoa! Last time I walked a runway, I was like a deer in the headlights. And then, whoa, I think we have to do the one way walk. Okay. That was the original flossing. That was the original flossing. I mean, it is crazier than I even remembered. She's like, whoa, I was like a deer in the headlights. They told me I was walking the road away,

the entire time I thought I was gonna get hit by a plane. It was scary, but today I have cocoa with me, so what's off the man? You have the dog would have made that better. Fucking weirdo. This reminds me of this one time, was a little girl? I was like, whoa. I wanna be a model. And I tried to be a model, and then Geraldine Parsons Smith said, who do you think

you are? El McPherson? I'm sorry, I'm sorry, you're not pretty. To this day, I've never been able to be in Vogue magazine, okay? He's just making himself a cocktail. This is what I do at home when it's a Geraldine person's semester. Yeah, I'm like, Geraldine person comes out of mine and needs to make a new drink. Oh, you need to top off. OK, it's one time. It's one time.

Look, bro. Elizabeth, the dog lady. I mean, shut up. Seriously, Elizabeth, how many speeches do we need in a dog fashion show, OK? Like, here's our first, seriously Elizabeth. How many speeches do we need in a dog fashion show, okay? Like here's our first speaker, Elizabeth. She's like, I love dogs. That's it.

I love dogs. I have a rescue. We rescue dogs. Some dogs are into entering and rescue them. Okay. Our best president, never president of Obama. He's like, well, you know, dogs. Like dogs, I support dogs.

All right. Get Betty Ford out here. Who invited Betty Ford? Ramona. No, we're done. Lori Dern. So then, so that this fashion show is happening. And Tindsay goes, oh, I just want to get back to the things I used to do.

And then we got to the most hilarious image of a dog in an autonomous car driving at Tinsley Shins. Dries into her fucking feet. Oh, it feels good to be back. That was a girl I used to be. Unfortunately. I'm a girl I always wanted. Oh, my God.

That dog just pulled me over. Ah! I'm back. The image of that dog in the car, I watched that like 10 times in a row. Just going a B line towards him. He's like, oh! Like, how did that happen? Was this like some weird Cremlin's episode?

I do. We've lame production for so many things on the show, but just the huge pile of crap that Tinsley is taking from everybody is made up. You know, I mean, even the dogs are driving into Tinsley. I know. Okay, so. And then speaking of that little car,

then afterwards, Sonia and Ramona put their dogs in the car, they're like, we got to pick them down for a second. And Emilie the dogs are to have sex. And they're like, we got to stop them. And Sonia's like, huh, she's got one foot in the grave. Let her have some fun. So then we get a car pulling up to the, we get a car driving to the Berkshire's. This SUV is come with the woman I'm going. And you just hear Luang going, straight, straight, sir Jesus. Crow, left, left. Jesus, it's Mrs. Deliceps to you. Does Liza suffer this?

No! How about Liza has a driver who knows what left means? One, two, three, hit it boys! Sometimes you're happy and sometimes you're sad, but the world goes, God damn it! Good and just say, driver, you're... Left!

Your other left! Luant does have a lot in common with Liza. You didn't say it, driver, you're butt. Left, your other left. Luan does have a lot in common with Liza. Like, remember that time when Liza beat up her husband with a vodka bottle? Yeah. Oh, history. OK. Luan with a Z.

So quite over there, talky walky talky. Oh talky, talky. Oh yeah. By the way, feel free to tell your neighbors to shut up if they're talking when you're trying to listen. Shut up. Because that happens a lot. No, don't shut up. We love you. You're just one. Okay, if you're neighbors. Like me. Look what I'm about to do. Shut up. So, God, this episode is so good, because now they get to the yacht and They're at like the they're at like the dock or whatever and there's like a tiny little gate And they're like yeah, whoa we're here Hello And there's like a woman over there. She's like

Reach over the gate and pull up the latch. What? What? I can't hear you. What? What? We're trapped. We're trapped. You're stuck. You're never getting back on land. Do you have enough food?

We're never getting back. Sonia's sliding a fire on the red. Hold on. We'll be right there. What the fire, Sonia? How do we open a very small gate that we could step over? What do we do? How does a door knob work? How do we open a very small gate that we could step over? What do we do?

How does a join up work? So then they finally get into this gate and they start walking down towards the yard. They go on the, the, and Bethany's there and you know, because someone's one up and someone with a yacht, you know? Yeah. Bethany's like, oh my god, my shot, my shot. Yeah, it's great, it's great, it's chilly outside,

but you know, it's great. It's not your fault, you know, what do you can do? I can't see, I can't see, I can't see, I can't see, I can't see. I collect it, it's great. It's great. It's chilly outside, but you know, it's great. It's not your fault. You know what you can do. I can't see less. I can't see less. I collect it. I collect it. I actually start with my crates.

I know a lot of people ask you. See shells? Oh, yeah. I have to shell. It's nice. Yeah. I'm not much seating, but you know. You got tablecloth.

You got tablecloth. Yeah, I got tablecloth. I got tablecloth. Congratulations. It's like a really tiny house that no one wants to live in, the floats. I mean, I don't know why you want it, but you want it around.

Is it around, house? I don't think so. So they're on this boat. By the way, the woman who owns this boat or at least has rented her name is Deborah Wasser. I don't know who she is. Like, I kind of feel like she's something auditioned. A little bit, right?

No, Deborah Wassaster is someone rich married to some fucking guy who did some bad shit. You know, I don't know anything about this show, but I'm psychic and I can guarantee you that privileged fucker did something. It's like Mark Rich, you know, she's married to like Mark Rich or something. Yeah, she's the Denise Rich of this show.

So they also down this table and Lwynns it's down. She sits down in front of a glass of this. So they also down this table and Llan sits down, she sits down in front of a glass of wine. She voluntarily sits in front of wine and then she goes, whose wine is this? Oh, the memory is me. I'm touching it. My precious. My precious. Well, it's not the corner of my mind because my mind is round like my house Like the roundness of my mind. I don't even want the goddess the only thing I think about rosé I mean here. I am trying to move on in life and someone puts a glass of wine in front of a place that I've launched early so down in Come here often. I am a singer. Yes, I do swallow I'm here often. I am a singer.

Yes, I do swallow. Come here. Oh. Oh. Oh. Best date I ever had. Rose. So Bethany's like, I can't run at that.

That's tempting fate. And you're all tempting fate. You're on a boat. Have you heard of Titanic? You were just on a boat last year, OK? It was called the Woe Tammic. Yeah. This cast does not do well on boats.

And Beth and me is like, did you hear about the naked chef? And Torinda just hops up on the edge of the boat like, I told you let you tell. That was a surprise. It's true that I'm going to have a naked chef. You're going to love me. Okay. We're on this like, whoa, where are we? There's three hours to go. We're lost.

We're morons. Like, Ramana. We're at the docks, though. So they started talking about the food that's there because there's sushi, et cetera. Oh, I didn't even think about it. There's sushi with Bethany there. Someone in the other room. That's different kindy with Bethany there. When someone in the audience is different kind of, oh girl,

I already been yelled at by allergic people. Yeah, no, I'm not trying to start. I'm just saying. Listen, I've pissed off a lot of people in my life, my long life. You do not want to piss off a person with analogy. Err, my sister's got like 20 of them. Do you know what that bitch goes through

every day of her life? Like, can't go there, can't go there, can't go there, can't go. Gwag! WOOOOO! I've never seen someone so horrified in a hamburger shop. It's my sister. So they start talking about sushi and like eating sushi off of like naked women and everything and how they never really like it and like they start making all sorts of really unpleasant jokes about whoa it's not supposed to smell like fish down there, okay? Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, I saw this on Orange County. You know what, you see a sushi girl? Get a job. Get a job. Do you think your mother's proud of you right now?

She's serving sushi off your belly, but no, she's not. I'll tell you that right now, she's not getting a job. So they start, yeah, they start talking about sushi, vagina, and stuff. And then, Lou Ann's like, oh, Ramona, don't have all schoolgirl on us. And Ramona's like, well, I'm not being a schoolgirl, but I don't know what you're talking about,

because my pussy doesn't smell like sushi. I'm sorry, I'm sorry, but my pussy doesn't smell like unagi, okay? And then the man goes, oh, well, you take it to a whole new level Ramona. I was saying it in a classy way. I was goes, oh, well, you took it to a whole new level, Ramona. I was saying it in a classy way. Like, oh. I was like, y'all are talking about fish on vaginas. The bitch is back.

Oh, my God. It's great. Welcome home. So now the cut, now the cut. Welcome back to my lunch table. So now the women do what they do whenever they're bored. They pick on Tinsley. It's like, so we're Scott.

We're Scott. We're Scott. She's like, oh. Right before they do this, the bored, they pick on Tinsley. So like, so we're Scott, we're Scott, huh? We're Scott, we're Scott. She's like, ah! Right before they do this, the late, they just talk about the ginas and sushi. And the lady who's just brought them onto their, you onto a yacht, catered an entire party and now had to listen to this goes, well girls, there is sushi if you want to eat.

I did actually spend my on this. So funny. Okay, yeah. So, Luan's like, so the way I'm like so How Scott Is he real Is he real I don't want them to gather. I'm like, oh!

I'm like, I need a nirvarch. Just, who? You don't want your mom to be with your dog? And say, oh! Scott! Scott! It's Scott the dog. I can't follow this.

No! So it's like, so, uh, does Tinsie do you want kids? So we have an baby shamed you yet today. Do you want kids? But it's like, yeah, yeah. How old are you again? How old are you? You want to see it?

Here's the camera right here. How old are you again? I'm 43. Oh, 43. Yeah, yeah, that's dog ears. Yeah. I mean, come on, Tinsley. I tried to read your expiration date and it's like faded off my head.

Yeah. Okay, like done light of me. It's like just opened up some manning and it was like three years expired. I was like, whoa, gotta get rid of this thing, huh? Intensely is like, it wasn't something I didn't think I wouldn't be able to do. I mean, I didn't even know I'd make a choice. I was like, what?

And then her mom is like, yeah, she saved her eggs. I'm supposed to do, I guess. I mean, I don't know who wants her eggs, but she saved them. And so Bethany makes this joke. She makes this like a stupid joke. I'm supposed to do, I guess. I don't know who wants her eggs, but she saves them. And so Bethany makes this joke. She makes this like a stupid joke. And the only reason why I'm mentioning it is because Bethany goes, you know, I'm on my third day,

and then like Moich has moved, and it's in the driveway. And then it cuts, and for some reason, it just cuts to remold. And she goes like this. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. You see, no matter what your problems are in life, you can get along if you're just making fun of the same idiot.

Okay guys. Fans like order in the court, order in the court. Tinsley, do you love each other because I'm not hearing that part. Maybe it's because I can't hear anything over my cabaret. All my adoring fans washing out Tinsley's voice. Don't tell me not to live just sitting, but Tinsley, are you in love with Scott? Let's candy and the sun love all about it.

Baby, love, don't bring a runner, clad the ring of my brain. Baby love So then tinsley says the most hilarious thing she goes guys My brand and my image is connected to New York Tinsley's brand you almost got rid over by a dog in a car a Dog driving a car almost ran you over. That's your brand right now. And she tells Bethany. She tells Bethany.

No, I mean, come on Bethany. You're someone who knows about branding and stuff. Bethany goes, ahh. I'm not even learning of stuff! I'm not even learning of stuff! I'm not even learning of stuff! I'm not even learning of stuff! I'm not even learning of stuff! I'm not even learning of stuff! I'm not even learning of stuff! I'm not even learning of stuff!

I'm not even learning of stuff! I'm not even learning of stuff! I'm not even learning of stuff! I'm not even learning of stuff! I'm not even learning of stuff! I'm not even learning of stuff! just because she's born, he's totally rich and will pay for their entire life forever. And this shows only going to last so long. This will probably be fired in a season anyway. Why move? Move the Chicago.

Do I need to show up there with the fucking dolly and strap them in? No. Scotch and move to New York. Move and don't pack a pre-know. Furthermore, so the whole thing is that like now they're saying this crazy stuff like, she's not going to move unless she gets a ring, which is also a little crazy to me. And they're like, well, is there a ring? And she's like, well, I know he knows the shape of the ring,

like it's gonna be in a circle. And then like, like he's talking about. And the way it goes. Well, wait. Oh. Just there's a girl. Who shows a girl a picture of a ring? Who does that?

That's the crazy shit I've ever heard in my mind. Which is true. Tinsy's like, he showed me a picture of a ring. It's like Beyonce says, if you'd like, then you should take it a picture and email that has an attachment and send it to me on Gmail. So, bonus like, whoa, Scott knows that Tinsley wants a commitment.

Oh, I think he's just playing with her or playing with himself. So, shit. I'm not leaving without a ring. I'm not leaving New York and the one goes, really? And Sonia is like, I would want a ring. I'm like, okay Sonia, you met your husband while you were a hostess at an Italian restaurant that he came to occasionally.

Now look, congratulations, nice move bitch. I've been a hostess in an Applebee's. Look at my poor ass doing a podcast. You scored, but let's not pretend that you're writing a relationship, but okay. Did I say ring? I think I meant rim job. This is also the episode where we finally understand

Sonya's line, which is still really weird. She talks about being a bottom later. And I'm like, this was the crux of your story line, Sonya. You had to make this your opening line. OK, so Tinsley's coming up with all these excuses for Scott and everything. And everyone's like, OK, something is messed up.

And like, you know, like, but they eventually are like, you know, what? Something is wrong, DeGa and Seyne, but we're really bored listening to Tinsley. So they're like, all right, all right, all right. Well, we help you know, you know, you're beautiful and you know, like you have a good to self, you know, you know, you know, you know, you're beautiful and you're beautiful. You're doing great, you're doing great, you're doing great, you're doing great. And Tins is like, oh, I feel like you guys are mom is shopping right now and you're being

a meaner, meaner, don't be mad, I really don't shit. No, no, we're not. We're just saying that we love you. You really old your eggs are falling out of your face. Like you literally have a ear. You have, I thought it was a bat in your cave, but it's an egg trying to escape What do you matter about we're just trying to love you? Yeah, and Luangist has the most patronizing things just like Well, I hope it turns out really well for you

That was a joke girls That was a joke, girls. The man goes, here's to you. And Romana goes, here's to your dream. He says, he's like, you guys are worse than my mother. Which is so true. And I hope when they fire at him, please, they bring on Dale. Because Romona means a little. Well, you know, you know, Dale was standing at that gate.

He's like, you're doing great, Tins like, you're doing great, Tingeley. You're doing great, Tingeley. You're doing great, Tingeley. I'm over here at Tingeley. So then the scene ends, the camera pulls back, and you hear Beth Nger. You gotta love yourself. Listen to Justin Bieber.

Baby, baby, baby, baby, oh, baby, baby, baby, oh, Justin paper's my mother I'm so despiseed Oh my god, we're gonna be here till seven oh Okay Oh, we're not here's here's the crazy part. This isn't even the good part of the episode This episode is so this show though. I love the whole thing so now so now we go over to the back This don't man

And she's telling Lynn her assistant Hey, you all right look here. You got you I guess in carving things and Also some electric carving things. So I'm fucking Duranda, you know, we all have a Duranda in our lives. I'm the Duranda in my life. Were you just ordered so much to sit from Amazon?

Yeah. You get there and it's like summer house where there's like a mountain to sit, your house. Also, you know how it's like May and you see like, you randomly see a Halloween store and you're like, who's going to a Halloween store in May? It's Duranda. Duranda.

100%. So it leaves everything at this store and drives all the way back to the Berkshire. It's like, hey, let's do that like this store. Hey, durandas. So Durandas like, listen, I've got all, I love decorations. Their eyeballs, their call call dreams the dead people Their skunks Jewels Weinstein

I got one of the tins these legs hanging there in the window I got one of John's on the way over there. I Got a ball made out of rubber bands Gary I got a ball made out of rubber bands. I think it's nice to carry, but I like it. I got a New Yorker from 1992. I've never heard of a glee plug in. You know what's scarier than the devil? A dirt devil. Got one of those. You got to do a fight with Mike Dyson.

Am I right Dyson, bro? I got to bring out the jerk table. I bring out the Dyson. Let's fight. Two men and two one men, leaves. You don't realize how crazy people are when they have so much space. Yeah. You know what I mean?

Imagine Dorenda in a studio apartment. Because you know she does have five damn vacuum cleaners. You know, don't forget this is the woman who broke her foot when her pepper shaker fell off a cabinet onto her foot. She got a tattoo. You know what? For all this, should I'm giving Tinsley for getting attacked by a dog in a car? Dorenda got attacked by a pepper shaker. What?

What? You're Tinsley, son, and we're willing or I'm gonna be arriving in there early. And I like that. Cause then I get to see this face over and over. What? What? What?

What? I don't have that face. What? So then we have, we then cut to, uh, I love that face. So then we have, we then cut to Tinsley who every time they go on a group trip, Tinsley is always back like in the trunk. You just see like the top of her eyes and she's like, the way back. The way back. The other side.

But, Driver, could you put the spare tire and take it out of the way back and put it in this seat? Tinsely means that seat. He driver. Hey, driver. I think the spare tire's eggs are drying up. Could you fix that? So Ramona, this is like, we always imagine what would happen if Ramona was like a voice on a wave

and now we get to know. Whoa. Whoa. And a hundred feet. And a hundred feet. you're gonna pull on some moisturizer. It's gonna look like you're five hundred feet ahead and you're gonna miss your charm. Then what the hell are you gonna do stupid? And a hundred feet is a red light camera. Okay, here it comes, here it comes, there it went. Well,

you're supposed to take the spring, brook, walkway, okay? 300 feet ahead. Oh, and 50 feet ago, you're supposed to take the Somal River walkway, okay? And of that, and of that, and of that, and of that, just waived at me. In half. You're waste, you guys ever used that. It's like some guy you met at a party two years ago just passed by and said, BEEP BEEP.

I know. What the fuck care is? In half a mile, there's a very handsome man on the corner, but we're not dating, okay? Oh my god, we're coming up on my favorite part of town. It's called Single and Ready to Mean, okay? In a quarter of a mile, we're gonna pass AOA. No one cares about AOA. It's all about the team.

That's a campsite. AOA was from our last year. You see AOA's restaurant. I feel, I think of AOC and I think of my Republican mother like just her head exploding at home With if ever I'm in a fight with my mom, I just need to say AOC doesn't agree with that You want to make her a public and go crazy just say AOC bitch

say AOC, bitch. They're like, I'll make you a new green deal. Hit it, boys. The grass's so is greener. That is a song, you know that. I do know that. The grass is always greener. What's so wonderful?

That's so wonderful. Yeah, they have to do it. And the characters who sing it are both the Rindas too. Yeah, they are. Are they? I got out of the dialects, wonderful. What's the wonderful? Hey, what is that wonderful?

Italian weed. And grassy cow with green. I'll tell you what's wonderful. I'll tell you what's wonderful. D'Aurinda's sister, Melinda. Oh my god. Wow. She's great. She's great. Melinda's sister. What a gift.

Melinda. Melinda's sister. Like I get the. Wait, Durand Melinda. Oh my God. Durand Melinda. Oh my god I just remember in the lean Yeah, Melinda. I love that sitcom So yeah her sisters in there and she's just like Dorenda but without like that stuff that freezes your body Or you know what I mean, right? She's like a Dorenda that doesn't live in the city. Let's just say yeah

your body or you know what I mean right? She's like a dorenda that doesn't live in the city. Let's just say. Yeah. So not to be rude, cause I'd hang out with that sister first. No, that's right. I love you dorenda, but your sister grows things. Yeah, little zikinis.

Her sister's like, Hey, bad bad, that's you. Hey, bad bad, that's you. Hey, you like the decorations? You like the decorations, but you like the decorations? I like the decorations. You like the decorations? I like the decorations. You like the decorations, man? I like the decorations, man. I like the decorations.

I like the decorations. You want the decorations, man. Hey, they're good. Did you notice on the sister laugh, she literally laughs like this? I like the horns. I like the horns. I like the horns. I like the horns.

I like the horns. It's the witch cursed. I like the horns. I like the horns. I like the horns. I like the horns. I like with you. It's a kiss. Yeah. The kiss reached 9 to 5 to 6. You made fun. Yeah. I had to put it outside.

We got a project back it up. We're the same people. We're from the same place. I don't want to see that. It's got back you, June. You get that, June. You know what? You know what?

You want to see it? Which make a sandwich. I'm doing this. If it has bad, June, when you give it to me. You know, like, if you want to see him, which make a sandwich. I'm doing this like, if it has bad Juju, what'd you give it to me? And she's like, oh, he says the, oh! To the people who don't watch Real House of New York,

this is a verbatim scene. Dorenda and Melinda, I will never forget either one of you. That was amazing. So now, a true highlight. Ramona, Sonia, and Tinsley arrive. And they get out of the car. And of course, the first thing that Ramona does is that she sellies the place by letting her dog

be on the lawn, which immediately is where dog should be. But I just like that that's the first thing that happens when Ramona arrives somewhere. Your nation. I mean, baby steps. Remember last time I walked right in and shit right in the living room. Yeah that's true. So you know how Dorenda says she likes everyone to arrive separately so she gets all the different reactions. Well they didn't arrive separately but she did get every individual like

every single one of them. Somebody's like well I dated that guy. I dated that guy. Have you forgiven me yet? Can I unfuzz the painting of you in my apartment? Well, I dated that guy. I dated that guy. Have you forgiven me yet? Can I unfuzz the painting of you in my apartment? I did, of course, we saw that now iconic zombie lady sitting there like she's eating off her arm. She's like, whoa, it looks like Bethany crying, which is just, I mean, I mean, so good. This, it was, it was right on the mark.

So then Ramona is like, oh my god, can't believe how many decorations to bring to the house. Who does that? It's like a whole storm, one house. It's kind of gross, right? I'm supposed to be happy about this. Who's gonna help to Brenda? It's terrifying. Who cares, let's find someone to fucking this bed by this zombie, looks like that.

So they go into the kitchen, and Ramona has a new sort of outlook on life. There's a little thing that says, good vibes only, and she goes. That's it. Whoa. This is the theme for the weekend. I want you to look at it.

Look at it. Take it in and believe it. Believe it, it says, boom vibes only, all right? It says, if I remember correctly, it says, Bethanyany is a slut right? Is that what it says? Oh no looking to sign I found it says Bethany fucked away at the top came the only reason she got anywhere she opened her legs okay don't tell anybody. It says I'm sorry I'm sorry wow Durintha look at all these luanse you have around. I'm sorry, I mean, jackalanders, you have around you.

And so I'm just like, that sign should say buckle up. It's the law. She just wants to put all the New York statutes. You may have built a blasio speaking. Okay, so Drendas like, you know what, you know what, you know what, you can't say long time, she's coming late,

but she's going to stay for a little bit, but she wasn't a great movie scene. You was going to be great, maybe. You see me? I mean, maybe I'm guessing the big, I'm guessing like she was very happy, you see me. The big, the big issue is that Dorenda is a room short for all the women. I have a question. Does anyone else here watch Instant Hotel on Netflix?

Has anyone seen it? Does anyone else think that Blusa Manners should be on the next season of Instant Hotel? Where everyone goes around and rates each other's Airbnb's? All right, we're here to judge the Moroccan room. What say you? You know, I like the Moroccan room but I didn't have a good night's sleep. However, I thought the local attractions were quite fine after all. I'll tell you what, it's going to be difficult to sell a Moroccan room. It's a difficult thing to type into Geagle. The devil's in the details. The devil's in the details.

The attention to the details. When you're looking for a place you don't see Morocco, because no one has to spell it. Mexican room. Mexican room. It's got an X right in the middle. Everyone knows. It's pretty tacky.

I had to wear some on sleep. Have you thought about the be-hittings that occasionally happen in Morocco, not good for business? I don't call this an A or B and B. I call it an A.F. No one know. I highly recommend everyone watching this in hotel, by the way. It's so good.

It's not a million show, which is why we're talking like that. I like when the show is late in the show and we're all wasted. Yeah. And you guys just start booing me for no reason, just because you feel like you know you should. Booing me for that. They're like, boo! So anyway, so now the big scandal, okay? So Durinda wants to put Luann in the Moroccan room,

and then Tinsley, is this prices right all the sudden? Everyone's yelling out there, prices. Let's go! $1, shock room, $1. So, and isn't it funny? Because isn't the, oh, not us, we'll afford it. Where the turntable comes around and you realize you want a shitty room, you know?

It's more like, let's make a deal. So, so, Lewand's gonna be the Moroccan room and then, during this like, so tinsley, I'm gonna put you in the back room. Are you afraid to be there? It's only slightly haunted. There's also a back colony and a hornet's nest back there. That's okay, the right.

He's like, who's the U-Pregman? Wow. So then the big question is, who gets the fish room? Now, this is so funny because no one will tell Durinda that that room just fucking sucks and they all hate it, right? Because you know what happens when Durinda gets mad. Everyone's terrified, I don't blame them. So they're all pretending that that's a good room.

And Durinda thinks that that's like the best room. Meanwhile, they want to stay in Hannah's room. No, ma'am. I'm not staying in some 20-something-year-old girl's room with gigantic eyebrows. No. It doesn't matter because Bethany has that, they, Durinda's given that room to Bethany

who doesn't even show up until tomorrow. But the funny thing to me is, how is it that we've made it so many seasons into the Berkshires and only now is the first time that someone's complained about that fishroom? Because every season we're like, what's the deal with that crazy fishroom? And now it's like suddenly people are like,

oh God, the fish room. And for those of you who don't know, the fish room, it's like a teal room that has all sorts of strange sharks. And remember that fish that would sing songs? It'd be like ball, ball, ball, ball, ball, ball, ball, ball, ball, ball, ball, ball, ball, ball, ball, ball, ball. It's like that.

It's like anyone from the South, it's like your Papa's dream room. Yeah. I caught that fish one time when I first met the host of that. It's like, shut up. That's a lie. It's like it's a singing bass, Papa. Like, stop.

So, Ramonigas, whoa. Durinda doesn't realize the fish room is the least desirable room. I mean, who wants to wake up with a big fish? And I'm like, I know, that's one gay. It pays to come early, okay? And then during this, like, you can see the best room. She's gonna love it. Her remote is like, you snooze your boots.

Yeah. So now they're getting ready for dinner. They can go to dinner, and they're all upstairs getting ready. Everybody goes, did the luggage come up? They're at a private house. Did the luggage come up? Like, who do you think is going to bring up the luggage? And I thought they were like, okay, and they're all going to go wackily get their luggage.

No, they just leave it there and go to dinner and stuff. She's like, going up to the Bethany thing? She's like, hello, I asked you to bring it my luggage, okay? I'll give you $500. Oh, her. So they go to the hotel and it's a Durinda mainstay, you know, because Durinda walks in there and she's like, hello, where are you? Where are you again? Where are you?

Come here. Get on my lap. Get on my lap. Love you. Love this place. So she hugs everybody in the restaurant. Yeah. This is the perfect stop to reach or do smooth the campings. Because she can prank them here. I couldn't even think of a better play. It's Hamptons, it's Luane. Everybody knows her name. It looks like we're falling down here many times. Nobody said anything about it.

One time she stepped in, made an eye with the fourth. You know what it made? Did she change her name before key? She's happy about it. She loved it. Where are we going to go? Forky Romano. Louanne is bending over backwards to make this woman happy, right?

Oh, Dorenda is, yeah. Dorenda. So you said Louanne. Louanne. No, Louanne's not. She's doing that. Thank you for cracking me. So we're like, what the fuck are you even talking about right now?

So this is a very lovely hotel. Looks very fancy. So Louanne struts in like, Cabaret's star coming through. Cabaret's star. Yeah. I'm sorry, I heard five. Is that right?

All right, I'll be at the door. So Luanne sits down and she's like, wee wee wee wee. Wee wee. Wee wee. Wee. Wee. So down, so down, so down, so down.

So down, you're rocking the cabaret. Oh, you're rocking the cabaret. I'm just marking it. I'm just marking it until I'm... Mark, marking it, Mark, Mark McGrath, it'll actually be part of it. So Luanne, a big Mark McGrath fan right there. So, so Luanne says down, she's like, Dren, have a question. Can I get a massage tomorrow? Can you get someone to come over and massage? Thanks. Also, I have an 8 AM wake up call. I'd also like a croissant for breakfast.

And if we could do many patties in the afternoon, that'd be great. Thanks. Do you know what blackheads are here? Do you know how to remove them? That would be great. All right, just have someone in my room by morning. What do you have on your paper view? I'd like to see the new DiCaprio movie if you have it.

Yes, thank you. Actually, I'd love if you would just re-enact the little mermaid for me. Just by yourself. Yeah. I'm really in my eyes heard. I don't want to watch a movie. But I... You know, I'm really mainly concerned about the part when she's got legs and is on land. I really don't like the earlier part.

So if possible, can we just like ignore the under the sea part of that movie, thanks. Could you just reduce Star Wars where the dad is nice? Yeah. I thought Darth was kind of hot. He's an old friend of mine. Darth! How she phrases was just so rude, because she's like,

do you have massage people out here? No, Louanne! Dem massage people. They don't know what massage people are in the Berkshire's, okay? You facking bad. I mean, already I'm'm already I'm curious. She is deranged. So if I go out of the woods and I find to go to the banjo,

you think you can give a massage, you know? So it's like, well it's time to talk about rooms. And Louanne already knows what's coming towards her. I feel like. Oh no. Hold on, this is so good. Who brings it up? OK, doesn't Torinda leave? Torinda goes to the bathroom because she

doesn't want to yell at Luan, right? So she's like, hey, you want me to go close and massage here? It's really shit. I got to call it fucking massage company. What am I? Privil man. You know, she's in the bathroom like hitting her head up against the mirror.

Stay calm. Stay calm. Yeah, calling Malinda. I'm so serious. I'm that fucking wish. I let that wish in my house, Malinda. So she walks off and then they start fucking with Luan. She goes, what room am I staying in? I'm assuming the master. I mean, master of the house. It's not just a song I sing occasionally. She's like, don't tell me I'm in the fish room. If I'm in the fish room, I'm gonna freak out. That's it.

The fact that this is like, I think that can be said. If I'm in that fish room, I'm gonna freak out. That there is a fish room, that's a known thing. And then Sonyan Ramona, do the weirdest shit I've ever seen in my life, okay? Are you ready? Yeah. If I'm in the fish room, I'm gonna freak the fuck out Rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr The fun. Every person at restaurant is like, the fuck was that?

So, she's just laughing. She's kind of laughing, but she's also like, where's Carol? How is Carol the oldest one there? And she's like, I need Carol back. She's like, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, and the way I'm like, wow, she thinks I came all the way here, all the way from upstate. I went from upstate New York to upper state or New York to the then to the right to the mass use this and I came all the way there.

Upstate inherently makes me above you. Well, if she thinks I'm sleeping in the room with the fish, she's got another thing coming. And then it comes to her alcoholic excuses. Oh, yeah. Listen, humans. Every human out there, I'm so sorry you feel pain. Guess what you feel pain? Because you're a human being and it sucks. And life hurts, okay?

It's gonna hurt every fucking day of your life. And when you feel happy again, it's gonna be a reprieve for two minutes. And then guess what's gonna happen? Life's gonna suck again. Yeah. That's what we do. We're humans. So stop using every bad thing that ever fucking happened to be a dick to me.

You better step back. Thank you, little boy. Yeah, Luan uses the most ridiculous excuse as to why she can't be in the fishroom. She goes, we all woke up there with the worst hangover, and I would think the girls would remember that. Like she's going to be lying in bed there having like visions of a hangover and a shark. If she puts me in that fishroom, after all we've been through, and Sonny is like, she thinks it's the nicest room.

She's nicest. It's got green walls and dead fish. Do you know how hard it was for me to watch the mag? I can't. And Sonny could... Terrifying movie, terrifying. Don't insult her! Who magged? She was a bitch anyway!

They killed her at the end! What sort of bitch shark eats an entire beach of people? Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha I will insult her if I want. If I feel like it. So Luan. She's like cutting into a little tiny, full age. So Dharurinda comes back and Luan is now complaining to her. She goes, oh, so Bethany comes tomorrow and she gets the best room in the house and I get the back room. I love it and I wouldn't expect anything less. Meanwhile, Durrinda has just had a very relaxing call

in the bathroom with her good friend, Francia. Because during the coast back, like, we're killing it. The good guys. So she back like, we're killing it. Ha ha ha. Look, guys. So she's like, oh, well, I'll tell you this right now, I want Hannah's room. We call it the eyebrow room. They get stuck to your face.

You want that room? Yes, I want that room. She's lying, sorry, but Bethany's already got that room. Oh, so Bethany Frank, Frankl. Comes in a day late and she gets some ice from this room and I get the back room. Well, I love it. You know what? I wouldn't expect any less. I really would. Yeah. Well, she knows Bethany called and she's just saying, hotel, she has these weird things going through a tough time in her life.

And she says that she gets her own room. And the man goes, and of course, you listen. You listen. Last time I tried, when Bethany spoke, it didn't yell, Javani, to her. So when Bethany said, she'll say, she gets the best room.

You listen. And you, of course, you didn't say, who's gonna have that room Who fights over your daughter's bedroom. This is the weirdest fucking fight I've ever and you saw a picture of Hannah's bedroom It's not like elephants walking in with like fresh hores and water. I'm sorry. I've been watching Game of Thrones. I know And you know like Luan is still and probably will always be my favorite housewife of all time. I'm a huge stand, Shush, I love her. But that being said, but that being said, you didn't invite, you didn't invite Durinda's fucking boyfriend to your show.

So this is payback. You know, one good thing about always sticking by your housewife, like he's always gonna be the one. Yeah, I'm always gonna be Vanderpump right. And you can take ship for it. I will always hate Kyle's guts. Always, I always have, I always have. And the good thing is, yes, some years people are like, fuck you, Ronnie, fuck you. But then other years, Ronnie, you've always been right. Yeah

Never change your team. I don't cuz last year when I said Luanne was the best everyone's year to this year everyone booed Yeah, just stick to your guns cuz next year they'll be back They'll be like Vanderpump so washed up as yeah, I was like it changes, you know always yeah It's like your every real housewife just stick to your friends stick to your friends. Yeah, stick to your friends. Also, because it doesn't really matter that much in life. I mean... Okay, so then in the middle of all this, Luann's having a fit and it's so funny because

she's being totally on a small list full of ever seen in my life. It's like this big, okay? And she's like, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh like this big, okay? And she's like, Ugh! Ugh! Fiercely cutting it. And so, Tinsley, poor Tinsley, he's like, I always have to get this joint into this damn! Ah!

So, and the man goes, really, because I got this short end. So, Durenda's like, you know what? Like, I mean, you, these are like half a million dollars. You do like nice rooms, they're all nice. I don't know what you're complaining about. And the wind goes, oh. Do you ever hear the saying, it's the thought that counts?

Have you ever heard the saying, what penny save just a penny earned? You ever hear the saying, that's the way the cookie crumbles, yeah. Have you ever heard the saying, ho ho ho, Merry Christmas, Rick? You ever hear the saying, one in the hand is we're two in the bush,

in the bush. You ever heard the saying, dial one for English, I'm all right, guys. You ever heard the saying, called 1-800-M-A-T-T-R-E-S, and leave the last S-O for savings? I don't want to be a bad guy. I want to be a bad guy. I want to be a bad guy. I want to be a bad guy. I want to be a bad guy. I want to be a bad guy.

I want to be a bad guy. I want to be a bad guy. I want to be a bad guy. I want to be a bad guy. I want to be a bad guy. I want to be a bad guy. I want to be a bad guy. I want to be a bad guy. I want to be a bad guy. I want to be a bad guy. Baby, Sha, can't change it. Baby, Sha, can't change it. No.

Baby, Sha, my key. I can't do it. This isn't loony tune land right now. Because you know the dorena we all love would be like. What? What do you say about my vision? My father caught those fish in a male truck in the middle of the Staten Island river

The Staten Island river you know the sad thing is I actually lived in Staten Island carry on this going So Luanne now had that like any good diva Luanne now has a monologue She should like I mean I don't even know why she's not in a turban with a feather in it, okay? She's like you have an empty room tonight because Madame Bethany is coming tomorrow and you're saving the room for who's coming tomorrow. And I drove from my house, upstate to come and stay. And after all the shit we've been through, I think it would have been nice if you made the gesture. I really do. Whatever makes you happy! You can't be that boom!

That's from an artist that you should know during the Cheryl Eat Crow. What if God was one of us? Sorry, it seems to be the hardest word in my ride boys. Where have all the bedrooms gone? Oh! So then the way I tell you. By the way, there has been a rich history of people fucking with the way I was doing.

Remember when you got put in the basement in Vermont? I'd back then, she was like, well, I would have thought you would put me on the second floor as I am about to get married. It would have been the nice thing to do. It's always something better. I love it. I was getting married.

I was just arrested. I was just a... I just had a yogurt. They're going to put me in the shark room. It takes me back to my past. My past has an angular fisherman in the deep seas. It brings me to the past and I've seen enough fish for a lifetime. That's like quote from the show.

The fuck are you talking about? Did you actually set up a set of fish for a lifetime? She goes, it talking about? Did she actually said I've seen enough fish for a lifetime? She goes, it just brings me to the past and I've seen it in a fish for a lifetime. I've seen it in a fish for a lifetime. So, Tim seems like, FINE-O! Oh, I'm singing that room and you can stand them rocking around. You're missing the what was that saying? God, I love saying.

The point. You ever heard that saying? The Moroccan room. What is it, the Plaza Hotel? And Tim, he's like, no, I'm missing the point. She put you in my room in the first place, but I got there early before you. And then I was like, I want that room.

It was like, I hear him before the wang. And then you will like it. It's a love you to see that. Because we are going out for breakfast. My egg is enjoying it. Oh. What? So now this is like a really nice thing of Tinsley

to do. And it was also nice that she stood up for Durinda. And Luania just said, oh, I didn't realize that. Well, thank you. And thank you for doing that. Thank you. But instead, she's like, that's not the point. Shean just said, oh, I didn't realize that. Well, thank you. And thank you for doing that. Thank you. But instead, she's like, that's not the point. She should have said, no, I'm keeping that room for Luan.

I mean, she's just like on, like, she is on, like a... I'm just... A countess. I'm just... She had the countess's back. You know, it's not funny. We've been trying not to say the seat. What we've successfully not,

I've successfully not said the C word for years And we switched that out with cut fitness when there's been the countess the whole time We've had the countess built into the C word. I've never even thought of it until right now, but God she's good at it Isn't she? Yeah, and by the way during all of this during all this fish fight Sonia and Ramona are still laughing. That's just like, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, What you gonna see for the swordfish tonight? Uh-huh. Why don't you go fuck a swordfish? This is an actual television show that errors nationally. Of a woman who used to be a Countess who's now a Cabrera star, telling someone to go

fuck a swordfish. I can't. And Dorenda God bless Fronzi. I mean, she's a good friend. Dorinda's just like, Ewwing, Jailing, Like she doesn't even care.

Dorinda's like in her own world over there. And Louanne storms up, and she storms out of the restaurant. And they're still following her at the camera. And she's selling some, I don't know where she's even storming to. No. She's not staying there. She goes down some like side hallway to the kitchen or whatever. And she's like, well, you ever run your nose? I'm sorry.

You ever run your nose? I never know. But I'm sorry, guys. I say that a lot, but it's happening a lot. It's like, well, I'm not drinking. How could you say that about? You know, I get bloody noses in the middle of the night. Who wants to wake up with a swordfish?

Well, you've got to... So the last storm's off and she's telling some bus boys. She's like, he's got some nerve putting me in the fucking fish room. Are you kidding me right now? And that actually is a cliffhanger? Like, only this show would have a cliffhanger That's how it ended Oh my god

You guys wow the Pacific Northwest you guys Portland you guys rock you guys are awesome Thank you so much for coming to our show. We're gonna come back this area soon. Love you. Bye everyone. Good night Hey, Prime members, you can listen to Watcher Crappens' ad-free on Amazon Music, download the Amazon Music app today. Or, you can listen Add Free with Wondry Plus in Apple Podcasts before you go tell us about yourself by completing a short survey at Wondry.com-survey.