Watch What Crappens - RHOP: A Strip Down Memory Lane

Episode Date: January 31, 2023

On this week's Real Housewives of Potomac (S7E16), Gizelle and Mia throw Robyn a bachelorette party at a strip club, and Charrisse shares memories of Karen getting drunk and banging a worker in a bathroom.Hey! This recap is available to watch with Crappens on Demand here: https://www.patreon.com/posts/77981811See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hey, Prime members, you can listen to Watch What Crapins Add Free on Amazon Music. Download the app today. Get ready for a double load of Queen of Hearts. It's me, Jujubee, and I return to guide sexy singles through some ronchy blind dates. Cameras off. Voice only. Launching during pride. Queen of Hearts takes Miami by storm, with Daeders' Cuppe from Tampa Bayes, Just Chas, and Brittany Brave to name a few. Follow Queen of Hearts on Amazon Music or wherever you get your podcasts. Hello and welcome to Watch Our Crapins, a podcast about all the crap on Bravo that we just love to talk about. I'm Ben Mandelker, and joining me today is the wonderful and hilarious Mr. Ronnie Karam. Hi Ronnie, how are you?

Well, hello, Bean, but you doing my little guy. Oh, I'm just kicking off the week with you here. It's Monday. Monday, it used to be morning, now it's Monday afternoon. And it's crap ends on demand day, by the way, we're talking real house, it's a Potomac, if you wanna watch us, not just listen to us, go to patreon.com slash watch or crap ends,

and we have our web cams on, not doing anything salacious, just recap and, you know, two friends recap and also this week is very exciting, because the tour is beginning, the Cheetah Brand, 2020 Cheetah Brand Tour. Okay, it's Staten. Staten on Thursday, okay, in Austin, Austin, Texas. I'm hopping on a plane. I'm going to meet up with my work husband, Rami, in Austin.

We're doing a show. We are recording an Austin. We're doing Real Housewives of Miami. That episode is coming out that morning on B-Cock and that evening. We are recapping it right there at Emos. So come join us the very next night we go to Dallas and we will be recapping part two of the Salt Lake City reunion. So all sorts of very exciting things go to watchocrapans.com to get tickets before time runs out and you miss it and you say, oh my god, I want to go to a show but I I missed it, oh my god, I'm so sorry, okay?

After that, we have a big tour. We go later in the month, we're gonna be going to Phoenix, then LA for the Golden Crappies, it's gonna be huge, it's gonna be at the Wilterin Theater in Los Angeles, which is, I saw Madonna there, so that's basically means like, it doesn't mean we're as big as Madonna, but it means that we are now on the path

to getting Madonna's face, so we're excited about that. And then we're as big as Madonna, but it means that we are now on the path to getting Madonna's face. So we're excited about that. And then we're going to go to Charlotte and Atlanta and Denver and Salt Lake City and Seattle and San Francisco, Toronto, Philly, New York City, DC, St. Paul, Chicago, Columbus, Boston, and finally the Foxwoods resort and casino. So go to watchrocrapins.com to get your tickets. And we'll see you at one of our shows. Yeah, pretty crazy.

And it's been a crazy Bravo weekend with news. A lot of crazy stuff has come out. Have you heard any of this stuff or if you've been in your little board game hole? Or have you been? I have not been in my board game hole. I was very upset. I had to back out of three consecutive gaming sessions because my friend had a

cough and I did not want to come down with anything before I often show. So I was in a bubble. So I did see what I saw was that Brandy and Caroline left the real housewives ultimate girl strip season for shooting a cow. I saw two different rumors as to why and they both amused me greatly. Well, the one I think is true is that Branty tried to make out with Caroline, and then Caroline went into a gay panic and wanted everybody to be on her side and fire Branty for sexual harassment,

and then everybody rallied around to Branty, and they sent some group text supporting Brandy and didn't know that Caroline was on it and Caroline saw the group text. And then I didn't hear that part. That's great. Freaked out on Bravo and the women and left, you know. So I don't know, but that's hilarious.

But also, you know, you can't just like make out with whoever you want to. But Brandy, you know Brandy, that's like how Brandy is nice to people. Like, remember with Vicki, she's like, oh yeah, you really turned me on. Yeah, I'm gonna make out with Vicki.

Like, that's what I wanna do. I wanna make out with Taylor and Vicki. It's like, that's how she tries to get women on her side. It's like such a man thing. Like, hey baby, let's make out. Like, she has this weird thing because she did it on the last season too. And I guess she thought she could get away with that

and it didn't really work. So. Well, the other rumor that I heard, which is much less scandalous, but made me laugh out loud when I read it, was that much simpler. That brandy spilled a tray of appetizers on Carolina Manzo intentionally.

Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, but I hope both are true. spilled a tray of appetizers on Carolina Manzo intentionally. I hope both are true. You're just good old-fashioned classic spilling appetizers on Carolina Manzo. I hope that Carolina Manzo went into a gay panic and then ended up with tiny weeners all over her. Yeah, I hope she went into a spana copa to panic. Like all these triangles, triangles of spinach and feta all over me. I can't do this. Okay, maybe she had like Vietnam flashbacks of being in the Dominican Republic with her

children when they got into that fight. And she was like, uh-uh, no, I'm gonna leave Marrakesh, because they're in Marrakesh. I mean, my Spanicopita with thickest thieves. So, today, here we are with the Real Housewives of Potomac. I mean my spanish copara with thickest thieves So today here we are with the real housewives of Potomac the naked truth More Kate, you know more like oh my god. Is she gay? Is she gay? Is she? We're all a little bit gay guys. Let's just calm the fuck down on housewives. My god, none of you have even, I've tried more of a China than you people, and I'm as gay as they come. Okay.

I was going to say when you just were afraid of a China's than these people. Sorry, Ben. Go ahead. I was gonna say when you describe Brandi, that actually sounded a lot like Mia's stick to, you know? Like, yeah. Yeah, I don't want to make that.

What do I get it? Yeah, you know? Which I get it, you know, like when you're, that's your talent and that's what you're giving the world, you know, like if I want to make that. What time you get it? Yeah, you know. What time you get it? Like when you're, that's your talent and that's what you're giving the world. You know, like if I want to help people, I try to make them laugh or you know, gain a lot of weight. So they have a reason to stay inside

more like I'll bake them cakes and stuff like that. You know, Brandy and Mia are both like people who became famous because of their looks, you know, being really pretty. And I guess that that's what they're offering is like, I don't know. Like, do we know any hookers? We should meet some for sure. Well, we are always down for hookers. But I was going to say I'm always looking to be made feel felt better by somebody who engages in, you know, like oral is their thing or like, you know, that's fun. I love

I like being friends with hookers and bakers. And candlestick makers, they really, it's really a spectrum of occupations. Funny that you say that because I have a candle right here that I've been burning to get the wax out of it. It's one of those novena candles and it has, um has what's their buttons from Game of Thrones. Oh yeah. Uh huh. Kaleesi. Uh huh. Kaleesi.

Uh I've been trying to burn it down so I could put a fake candle in there, you know? Oh yeah. So there we go. Candle stick maker. Look, that's basically you. Well, uh, for, uh, I was gonna make, I was gonna go on a tangent about hooking and I decided I'm gonna table that. We can talk about hooking tangent another time.

Okay. Hooking? Hooking, well, okay, I'll just say it, which is that my friend works at a library. And I guess hooking, I think maybe a type of knitting, like there's a type of knitting that you can do with hooking. And someone's gonna know that.

So when the kids are calling these days, like, hey, wanna get together and hook later? Yeah, bro, bitch and stitch, stitch and bitch. Well, apparently someone put up a notice at her library that was like, for people who are interested in getting into hugging, meet at the library this afternoon, or something like that.

And, you know, that's the sort of flyer that I really appreciate. Well, me too, and this oldest profession in the world, you would think that there would be some kind of workshop you can take. Like, what am I just supposed to do? Just get out there and trust my penis is going to know what it needs to do. No, I need to be taught. Training is important for everything.

That's exactly correct. Um, when, by the way, and there's no one who trains better than Mia, I mean, hello, did we not see her great work moving brochures around on a, on a receptionist desk with her ass cheeks, you know? So here we are. We're back in Potomac back from Mexico and Wendy is with her kids and she's having them do stuff with boxes and tape and she's like part of being the bosses over seeing stuff. And don't, don't worry about him.

He's fine. He has his own box, okay? And one of the kids is like, how do you do the tape, though? She's like, we're talking your pay. We're talking your pay. Wendy squeal. Yeah.

And then we go to Mia who is, she's with her cousin Kelly. I think I heard Kelly, yeah, Kelly. They're by like a close rack. They had nothing of note happens here, except clearly Mia has fired Jacqueline, as her friend of and has brought in Kelly for this experience. Yes, and Kelly is really just copying

Mia's whole personality, like the way she talks, the way she nods, the way she moves her head. I hope we get some more from Thirsty Kelly. So then Robin walks awkwardly into a boutique, which I think is how I start off every Robin scene. Robin walks awkwardly. Yes. So Robin is in a bridal boutique and I think the bridal boutique is called Deja Vu, which

is hilarious and Some there's some happy lady there some you know aspiring Veronica Mars type who's like so are you excited for your dress fitting today? She's like yeah Usually when I go on girl trips to Mexico. I'm like, I don't want to go home But I was happy to come home this time and now I'm getting stressed about the wedding Like your stress about your four-person wedding Like literally no mind dude You got all you got a beach Give it a rest Robin nobody cares. Okay, I love that the editors played clown music for this

They'd like to straight up play she's like I'm so stressed from my wedding They'd like to straight up play. She's like, I'm so stressed from my wedding. I'm like, brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr Well, you have to find the person and then you have to go to the place and then you have to have something to wear And then you got to find the drums so you can walk to its beat And if it's somebody else's drum you need to take it back some up grind drum You and I walk to the beat of a different drum And I walk to the beat of a different drum So she's getting a full-on wedding dress for a what someone else is wedding in Jamaica You are the tackiest ass person I've ever seen and I watch Vanderpump rules

Newporti scene Sheena do this even Sheena got like a nice little cute cocktail dress to do to pull this I assume I think we saw that was shein' a full-on wedding dress to pack and take to somebody else's wedding robin' shame on you gross. Yeah, well I think what's strange is that Robin has spent a lot of time saying she just doesn't want to be a make it a whole thing. They decided they're just gonna do it the day after her cousin's wedding because they'll be in the Bahamas. It's just a small ceremony. It's just literally, it's like not even a wedding. It's just like just someone on the beach in the fishy end. They're gonna change the rings. But then she's also getting a wedding dress and she's fretting about flowers and yada yada yada. So I'm like, which one is it? I don't understand.

I mean, I also have, sure, Bravo probably was like, well, we need you to do a scene in a bridal boutique. Since you said the word wedding, we need you to go through the entire Bravo television process of getting married on our network, which means you have to have a scene in the bridal boutique, which means you have to have a bachelor at party, which means you have to have prenuptial scenes, etc. So like, I get it. But also like, it's just, you're standing on a beach for two seconds. Yeah, for Christ's sake, just get the dude standing out there with the coconut and the machete trying to get you to pay $100 to rent a jet ski, okay? That's your preacher.

You're done. Captain Rahe. Okay, get Captain Rahe. And by the way, while you're at the dress store, could you maybe ask them for something that you could wear to confessionals. You look like Mario Kart with morning sickness. Mario. Not just Mario, but Mario Kart. Is there like a there's like bananas on her? She does like any second I'm expecting like one of those little guys to pop down onto the screen like and start swinging around going, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, just squirt oil all over the TV and run away.

I'm expecting Ash would hold up a sign that says, wrong way, wrong way. Okay, so Ashleigh does come and now, Ashleigh does this thing I really love to do, and I never see other people do it. But it's one of my favorite things to do when you go into a shop, especially like here in Texas because there are a lot of like farm,

farm design places here where it's like, welcome, this is the country, so this is a very fancy country store and they have like the little door that you open and it goes jingle, jingle, like with a real bell and they try and keep little door that you open and goes jingle jingle like with a real bell and they try and keep it country you know but sometimes these doors don't work and actually comes in with full on door judgment which I really like she's like she opens the door she's like whoa a little strong there I was like thank you I thought I was the only person who does that I judge doors all the time I'm like this, this door, is this door, does this door close itself, or do I close it?

You can close it, honey. Kind of fucking door is that. This door gets zero stars from me. You know what I hate? I hate when doors, doors and pedestrians do the same thing, which is when a door looks like it's gonna slam. It's like, shh. And then for the last few seconds,

it just looks, closes very, very, very slowly. And when you try to like get it to close, it's like, no, no, no, no, I'm going at my own pace. It like resists, you literally push us back. Yes, it pushes back. He's like, no, no, I don't want to go fast. I want to go slow. I know, it's like, well, then why did you go fast

in the beginning? Why did you pretend like you actually cared about slamming? And now you're going slow. That's like when pedestrians do that. You know when pedestrians walk across the street. The pedestrians do this all the time. They do this performative trot over the first first lane and then they walk over the second lane. And why do they do that? It's like you don't get bonus points because you actually consider trotting over the part that like you trot it over the part

where there's no cars. I do, I do a real tricky one, like where they're coming. And then I'll go like, I'll do a skip like, for Dom. And then I just walk really slow. So it looks like, I was gonna run, but then I didn't. Cause I used to have this insecurity where I would start crossing the road and be like, oh my God, I'm so fat.

And then they're gonna be like, oh my God, there's fat guys like trying to get across the road and he's making me wait forever. I don't want you, I just want them to go. So I was like, wait for them to go. And they'd be like, no, you go. And then I wait for them to go. And then I end up fighting.

And then they end up hating me anyway. So it's like stopping, so insecure. And nobody fucking cares about you, you know? So now I just fuck with people. And it makes me feel better. So now I just go, a skip. And then I walk really slow. And then I do the next thing that they hate the most.

Because you know what drivers hate the most? When the pedestrian walks so and scrolls through their phone. Girl, that is so. Yeah. Oh, they hate it. Yeah, it makes me feel so powerful for that moment. Listen, I want full strides. I want all attention on the crosswalk. And if you're going to start out doing the trot, trot all the way across, I would prefer you just to walk a normal pace all the crosswalk. And if you're gonna start out doing the trot, trot all the way across,

I would prefer you just to walk a normal pace all the way across, rather than do this patronizing ass. Little trot over the part that doesn't matter, cause like if I guarantee, if I'm trying to make a right onto red, and I'm waiting for pedestrian, they've trotted over the far lane, where the cars are actually there,

and then the part where I have to turn, that's where they're walking slowly. And I'm like, why don't you walk slowly in front of the cars that are there that I'm not turning into, and trot in front of the area where I need you to get by? No, because it's my ride as a pedestrian. It's like that thing when you hate it

when other people do it, but you like when you do it. You know, like that's how I feel powerful. It's like when people are in a parking space and there's no parking spaces and you see when you go up and you put your turn signal on and then they see you do that and then they get in their car and then they take a really long time to get out. And I hate when people do that because you know they feel so powerful. It's like congratulations on your fucking one minute of power of the day. get to be in control of the parking space because it was here is first, you know And when I'm behind that car, I hate them, but man when I get into my car

I'm like oh yeah Maybe a leansuit, sucker I'm like I have a right to check my phone right now. You made an assumption that I'm leaving Yes, I can't just be expected to come out from the home goods after unloading all of those bowls I just bought and then get in here and speed away. Maybe I'm just gonna sit here for a second and catch my breath and vape out the window while I check my Twitter.

But what you don't do, Ronnie, but what you don't do though is you don't get into your car and start backing it up and then put it into park and then check your phone for two minutes, because that's a me is the equivalent of a pedestrian trotting across the first half of traffic and then walking slowly in front of me. I support that pedestrian. This is equal though,

where you get in your car and then you press to break a couple of times. So it looks like, oh my God, this started the car. That's just fuckery, I have to appreciate that. It feels so good. Okay, so Robyn's bullshitting about her bullshit wedding. Nobody really cares about which is kind of hilarious because now you're officially tied to him again and it was like the worst year of both of your lives. Have fun, stupid. So Ashley comes, judges the door and they hug and then just alcomes and Robyn goes on to try on wedding dresses that she

doesn't have to pay for while these other two try on TRs and stuff. Yeah. And they're just like having fun and just all have the TR on and they say they give her a caption says, Miss Messyverse. So then they'd like sit down in some chairs, Ashley is like a floating head because she somehow has worn an outfit that's like the same fabric as the poultry on this chair. So we're just like oh wow. So they're sitting there and they're recapping and so Ashley's like well something's happened on the vacation in Mexico. So yeah so um so I hang out with I can't

isn't me and Wendy and like that's like a lot for me That's like a lot for me to do and uh and you when Candice kiss da she's like no Not me and Candice Someone else saw so I can't someone else um and someone did some vagina bumping I love it. It's like a celebrity password. You know Yeah, it's like like $10 pyramid. The really cheap version. Free for an Instagram shout out pyramid.

So I asked it's like, I didn't say for Tony jumping, huh? Humping. Mia was just admiring Wendy's physique. And she was like, oh, she was admiring Wendy's vagine. She saw Wendy's vagine. Awww! Yeah! And she was saying how attractive Wendy is and stuff.

And like saying, she's like into her and everything like that. Oh, wow. Did Wendy reciprocate, da! Um, Wendy wasn't intrigued. I mean, basically, Wendy said that herate daaah! Um, Wendy was intrigued. I mean, basically, when B.S. said that, her tongue is like a cable news network, Wendy was like, oh, I want to know more about that. So it's kind of hot. And then Rob, I'm like, oh, I'm coming!

That's what Wendy said, actually. If you can measure, here comes one right now. Celebrity Beef, you never know if you're just gonna end up on TMZ or trending on Twitter or in court. I'm Matt Bellasai. And I'm Sydney Battle, and we're the host of Wonder e's new podcast, Dis and Tell. Each episode explores a different iconic celebrity feud, from the build-up, why it happened, and the repercussions.

What deserves session with these feud say about us? We're starting off with a pretty messy love triangle between Selena Gomez and Justin and Haley Bieber, a seemingly innocent TikTok of Selena talking about her laminated eyebrows. It's snowballed into a full-blown alleged feud. But it doesn't seem like fans are letting up anytime soon. Despite both Selena and the Bieber's making public statements denying any bad blood. How much of this is teen jealousy and lovers quarreling, and how much of it is a carefully crafted narrative designed to sell albums?

Follow this and tell wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen ad-free on the Amazon Music or Wonder app. And so Robin has a very pretty wedding dress with the long train for a beach wedding. Robin, I'm just not buying any of this. Just stop. Robin also says. This is one of those story lines I just want to put a stop to. Every time it comes out, I want to put on a neon vest with some caution tape and come

out with the big stop sign that just stand in the middle of the road. Like stop like a crossing guard at a camera. You're a crossing guard. Stop crossing guard. As long as we talk about pedestrians, I really hate when crossing guards make you stop for people who are not children. I always feel like that's a big guard. Oh, God, you want to talk about a power trip? The fucking crossing guard. And then some, I didn't find out to my sister

I had kids, but she's like, oh yeah, those are volunteers. Those are like moms and stuff. And I was like, oh, the palace like Hannah's for a gun. So anyway, they do all know they know who they all look like. I'm so sorry if there's any crossing guards listening to this. But do you know who they look like? The lady from Happy Valley? Have you ever seen that show? I don't know happy valley. Is that like Diane Ladd? Look it up right now. Everybody, everybody who's listening to this, who doesn't watch Happy Valley, look it up right now. But it's like literally a crossing guard. It's a, it's a policeman. She's a. Yes. By the way, the answer is yes. But she just is miserable. She looks like the British version of Park Overall.

With some John Lithgow. So yeah, they all look like her to me. Okay. So anyway, the point is we're actually spelling all this tea that oh my god Someone played around and did some lesbian stuff. I'm getting sick of that on the show on all of these shows So come again Someone might have kissed him to the girl Have you have you were gay and you know who's not gonna be shocked either Robin Robin seems to have some gay tendencies Why don't you just just Jeacelle's never got a boyfriend. Why don't we just all stop acting like

this is the craziest thing we've ever heard? Don't you really have anything going on? Surely there are some lawsuits in the crack the back store. Whatever the fuck that thing is called. Good joint. joint joint. Yeah. Yeah, I agree.

Well, it just, it seems like there's certain story lines that Bravo pushes them towards that are just kind of get tired It's just this is what it is this year and so Robin by the way she does come out in this wedding dress It's a very nice wedding dress, but Robin's like I wanted to do something that's like not so traditional I'm like you're in a white lacy dress with a train So she goes Robin does some twirls and goes back into the little closet to no pun intended with what we're just talking about, but she goes back to change and then she's like, okay, let's get back to vagina.

So she went from throwing a drink on Wendy to liking her vagina. Maybe that's why she threw the drink. And so now they're like, oh yeah, maybe it's like sexual tension. Garen, she does not sexual tension. Right. So then, just like, okay, you have to ask me, ah, ah. So Robin comes out and this really terrible striped gown. There's a lot wrong with this dress.

It's vertically striped. And it's see-through, but it's like one of those see-through dresses, but it's also a mini skirt under. It's like a mini skirt. It's like a mini skirt. It's like one of those see-through dresses, but it's like also a mini skirt under. It's like a mini skirt. It's like a mini skirt. It's like an office suit under and then a weird ball gown over, I don't understand it. Yeah, it was, it definitely had like a skyscraper

office building look to it. Like the vertical lines, like white, but then there was like a grayish thing under it and then it was, some of the lines stopped and everything. I just felt like there was like a, I don't know, like an Obamaon pan by where her feet were. So I didn't like it either. Yeah.

To me, it was not a success as a wedding gown. Maybe a success as a going to some sort of corporate function gown, but I did not love it. And no one actually liked it at all. As the great poet Amy Winehouse once said, no, no, no. And as the great poet Amy Winehouse once said, no, no, no. And as the great poet, Amy Grant once said, hats, why do I gotta wear so many hats?

Shhh. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha like oh my gosh, oh she goes back in, she goes, I put Robin goes back to try on more potato sacks. So, what's the color of potato fat? There was like a vertical stripe. But Robin is just such a potato. You know, I'm like, what do potatoes wear? Just pick that.

What do potatoes wear? What does Mrs. Potato wear when she goes to it? Function. She's like, it's Vera Wang, stop it. Just because I'm a potato doesn't mean I don't have a fastened to fashion. Oh, I was like an actual wing. Vera Wang. Vera Wang.

Vera Big Weng. It's a Christian Suryano. Christian Suryano by Mrs. Christian. Christian, Christian, Sriracha, Yano. It's really trying to come up with some good potato puns really. But it's hard. Right now we're just on to general casual condiments.

I thought you were really little. Let's put it on. I don't know. just onto general casual condiments. I thought you really little. Let's you put it. Sachi. I don't know. Chirasachi. K so and. K so and to stada.

Nah. Okay. Miss miss. Miss Sun. I'm in miss. Sony. Miss. You know what's amazing. Sometimes when we do this, I'm in Miss Sony. Miss. Hi. You know what's amazing.

Sometimes when we do this, I can actually hear millions of iPhones clicking off. I know that weird. I can be right. I like to think that. Click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, one iPhone clicking off but it's like a very, it has like a top hat because the iPhone that someone from I heart is listening to to jump whether or not it is a word. So like it's not so common in a brand guys. I don't know who are we up against I forget. But yeah, this is, we submit this humbly, submit this episode to the IHR podcast awards. So, wow, let's get back to vagina, zah! So, Ashley's like, I gotta go, bye!

So, she leaves and Jacelle and Robin talk, and Jacelle's like, we need to talk, and Robin's like, this is literally bringing back memories of what? Like going to Tramana, getting a sandwich, I don't know. But anyway, yeah, so she's having flashbacks of her first wedding and she's like, so your mom isn't here, why is that dark?

I'm like, what haven't told her yet? Oh, well, now that you have this dress on and you're getting married, I was thinking that we could have a very upscale dinner and We could have strippers. Ah Yeah, so they start talking about this bachelor party the special rep party and who they're gonna invite and Rob is like Well, Karen's not invited and the way that Wendy was was laughing when when Karen was coming out me I mean, I don't believe Wendy's a genuine and wanting to be a friend.

And that's bullshit. Sorry, that's bullshit. Okay, that's one thing to not invite Karen because you got into a big fight with her. Like a really big bad fight. But Wendy literally was laughing because Karen was saying that Juan hugged her so tight that her breasts went to her back.

Okay, and that Juan's been walking around Georgetown with a faux Karen. And Wendy is laughing along with rest of us because it is so ridiculous. And you're gonna disinviter from the the batch red party for that? No, that's bullshit. Robyn's a hater. She's a hater. Robyn's just a plain, plain hater. She's been coming for Wendy all season for no big, no reason. And it's just another reason to exclude Wendy. And then Robin has this to offer

zero. Nothing. You know, it's like one reason to exclude Wendy. And then Robin has this to offer zero, nothing. You know, it's like one thing when a powerful housewife does it. You know, it's like, oh really? You treat me like that. Let's see if you come to my team. Crumpets party. But Robin, you just don't have the power of Robin, okay?

Jacelle can't keep you in that power position forever. Like nobody cares. I would rather watch Wendy teacher children how to put tape on a box than watch anymore about your potato sack search or your fake wedding. Okay. Yeah, I mean, I have really loved Robin in the past. I have really, really loved her. But this has been a rough season for her. It's been, we've seen a side of Robin that, well, maybe was not surprising to you, but for me, it's like, oh, I don't like this side of Robin.

I don't like it at all. Yeah, it's a sucky side. So then, Candace is in the kitchen. Candace in the kitchen. Candace in the kitchen. On a part of our favorite running scenes of the season is Candace in the kitchen, trying to cut bagels that are pre-cut.

These are pre-cut bagels. Not only that, she's using a teeny tiny cutting board when she already has a big ass butcher block that's out right behind her. Don't think I didn't see that in the background. Why are you, she's having the hardest time cutting these bagels. You see her, it's like, I think it's the first time

she's ever cut bagels, to be honest. And she's trying to show that she's like domestic and the sort of person who just can make a bagel. But she has no idea what she's doing. She's using way too small of a cutting board. And frankly, it's embarrassing. It's one of her lowest moments ever on this show. So they go outside with their burnt bagels.

She goes with Chris and they're talking about the trip and stuff. And Candace, it's like, listen, the old ladies were fighting. Wow. And he goes, yeah, it sounds real big, too. So then we go to Lib's Grill Grill where Karen is having lunch with Wendy, who they squill at each other. They're both an orange.

I mean, yeah, two caution cones having lunch. They sit and they have Mario Lopez as a waiter, so I thought that was cute. Didn't he look like him at first? Yeah, he was cute. dimples little yeah little yeah I liked him so I know I was like you're too you're too cute for this You're too cute for the ass you can aspire to more than lips grill Go fuck Karen in a closet Get her drunk get her drunk. Get her drunk.

She'll have sex with you apparently. So they're talking about Wendy and Karen sit down and Wendy's like, well, last time I saw you at a table, you were really pounding it. And she's, yes, and I survived. That's table shaking session. And then Robin comes to get the feed. And then we go back to Candace. So we're doing one of these back and forth moments

between Candace and Chris and Wendy and Karen. Yeah, so Candace is telling him, yeah, so Karen and Robin get into it. And there was a rumor that Juan was cheating on Robin with some woman, and they were walking together and Georgetown. I mean, he's like, of course, why not throw another husband under the bus?

And Candace is like, and it's dumb. It says dumb as you grabbing that cookie monster bitch. And they put up a picture of Deb. Deb are in the corner that says, Debra aka cookie monster bitch. Debra. It's like, it goes back to Karen and she goes, well, just to give you a background,

I have been sitting on one hugging me in a properly for three years now. And when he's like, oh yeah, because remember your weight shift party and we have a flashback of that party and Robyn saying, are you afraid of what you might say when you're drunk, Karen? And she's like, no, but I'm not, but you should be afraid of what Juan says when he's drunk. And then Karen says, yes, and when I fired that, I knew that she knew. So Candice, um, Candice tells Chris that Rob, so she goes, well, so then Robin pulls out this picture and it's just the back of Karen,

but you can tell it's Karen and she's just sitting there the guy, and it's the guy everyone calls blue eyes. Chris does not look like he cares at all. I think he's still like, he's I think upset about his bagel being burned. Yeah, and Karen's like, oh, let's talk about that picture. They won't show me. I don't care,

I would not address it. That woman is not me. Hmm. So, producer's like ask Wendy, do you think that looks like Karen? And Wendy's like, I don't know. She didn't show me because she was being too shady to me. And I didn't realize that Robin did not let Wendy look at the picture either.

No, because Robin got mad because Wendy was laughing at her. Says she wouldn't show Wendy or Karen. And then it cuts to that. Wendy going, may I see the device? May I see the device? May I see the device? And they're like, no. So, then Chris is like, did you guys do anything

besides talk about each other's husbands? And she's like, yeah, we went out and I got so drunk, I was in the shower and I didn't remember how I got there. So then is to talk about their IVF. He's like, now that all this stress is ending and you've got your next degree and you've got your dream of thing done, now we can try having a baby again. And it's like, and, and, and seen. And that was that. So then now Karen's phone starts ringing. And it's Ashley FaceTim in and And she's you know, Asher's busy being nosy being asking what they're talking about like what's the situation and Karen's like

Well, I'm talking about Robin. I think she has mr. Iced Anga and she needs to take that in the right direction So Asher's like oh well Well, there was a group chat She's also not about a bad threat party for Robin and you guys are noticeably not on the chain So I thought I'd call and let you guys know that you're not invited to something oopsies yeah and so Wendy's like what the hell are we trying to move forward or not you know and actually thinks it's because Gisele doesn't like Wendy and Wendy's like but we have to call this spade spade we've all been

brides and the people who are fighting are supposed to be the people we want there, not who the person throwing the event wants. I'm like, oh poor thing. Yeah, she doesn't like you. Yes, she's not gonna like you. She's not gonna just suddenly start like you. You have the way to Robin's heart is to be on her side

in every fight and fight for her, even when she's completely wrong wrong and do whatever she says. That's how you, that's how your friends with Robin. That's why the only friend she has is Jacelle. And I guess Sheree's because Sheree's is using her to get back on the show. Exactly. So sorry Wendy, you will not be going to a strip club to be where you can enjoy a very sad steak with some brown gravy on it and a lobster tail. So then we go to Mia and she's setting a table. So Giselle comes over and Giselle's first time being at the house and she's like, wow, you smell good. And Mia's like, do I feel like I don't. I feel like I smell like sushi. I'm like, do you know how sushi works?

It's like, if you are serving sushi, that smells enough that it can be on your sand and then you're serving poison basically. So it just sounds like, oh, these floors are beautiful. La, beautiful. So we're on the golf course, huh? Mm-hmm. So lots of people yelling about holes all the time.

You must be very comfortable here. So they sit down and Jiselle is talking about how Robin tried on some wedding dresses and stuff and she goes, and Ashley did give me a little mia Tia. She said that. Ah! I mean, it's so excited. Mia loves hearing Gossip about herself. I couldn't tell if she was be gossiping about you or maybe a California roll-out hard-to-tell

the different sometimes off. Anyway, she said that last night in Mexico, there was a competition. Ah! It's like a goat. You know, me just made like a little honk there. She's like, meh. There was some high flotation coming from Mia to Wendy, and I think maybe it was reciprocated

da. And she goes, and I was spreading rumors. You had sex. Ah, just kidding. No, I'm not kidding. I really did. But just to run in, and then we see a clip of that and I'm just I'm going I think there was vagina bumping and

So just else like but actually did say there was a vagina watching and he was like well she was showing She showed you her vagina. Yeah, like spreading When did this whole episode I could not stop staring at Wendy trying to imbibe. Like this, this is how she is trying to drink. She's like, mm hmm. Mm hmm. Mm hmm. The sequel to Waiting to Exhale trying to imbibe.

Mm hmm. Mm hmm. Mm hmm. Well, her lips come out so far. Definitely. She. Shall we stick out her tongue to like, I think she can't feel her lips come out so far. I literally... Shall we stick out her tongue to like... I think she can't feel her lips anymore so she's like sticking out her tongue to feel

like wherever whatever starts, you know what I'm saying? Uh, uh, uh, uh. I don't like trying to guide it but it never quite gets there. It's amazing and it happens the whole episode. Like someone helped the woman. If there are crutches for lips, get her some. Lip crutches. He's making some feelers.

She's making some feelers. Girl. I know. It's just, or like some sort of like funnel or something that's just gonna attach the front. Like a lip piece. Just like that. She literally tried to take a drink of water

through this entire scene and couldn't do it say So So Jacelle's like tells us I really thought Mia was not going to admit this But she confirmed it was there a flash involved actually I don't need to know why my version of the stories always gonna be better raw So my mind. I'm like, well, it's confirmed so we can drop this storyline. But it shall continue. Yeah, it's just such a weird thing.

I mean, do we just all hang out with different kinds of people? I mean, I've been wasted with lots of friends. We're like, show me your such a human. And then we do it. It's not that big of a deal, you know? I mean, do I just have sluddy your friends? I Just think that like it's not the Giants though. Maybe it's weirder with vaginas Yeah, I don't I guess I guess

This stuff. I mean, I'm not scandalized by it. I'm just kind of bored by it like it's not Yeah, but we're trying to be okay Penises vaginas and pubies, and bets. We've all got some of them, and some kind of combination. Like, can we just get over it now? Like, congratulations, you saw vaginas. Like, Jizel's like, ah, vagina. Oh, no, vagina.

Come on, Jizel. Yeah, I mean, Jizel just sort of senses that there's, she's like brainstorming. She's like, there seems to be a story behind here that we can get jumpstarted, da, because she knows that maybe's she's like brainstorming she's like there seems to be a story behind here that we can get jumpstarted because she knows that maybe if she can suggest that there was something a lizard that happened more than just like peekaboo that then that could become a fidelity issue which then someone could get that's her favorite thing yeah it's her favorite thing so of course me

is like yeah so I wanted I said I wanted she wanted to see it And so I showed her and then she showed me and she's like I really thought Mia was not going to admit this But she is confirmed You see you're just trying to come up with something else, you know, like what do I do? This I thought I had a few more beats in this storyline How many more episodes do we have of this song? Maybe we should just fast forward to the season finale. Yeah So Mia's like well, I was like

So you haven't been to all this I mean, that's just sexual So you haven't been to your own with them. It's just sexual transmission. You might be like, I can't go with you. Cause it is not consenting. And neither is gene. Yeah, just, I feel like if Mia actually sold cookies, they would just all be in the shape of brochures.

They'll be like, they'll be like, ELFudge brochures. So, so basically, it's just more, I just borrowed this. Yeah, you know, and she tells us, because she's pretty sure to ask. And she's like, you know, like, you know, she, she taught, honey, she taught, Fem, like, just a little okay. And she says, pretty nice, okay, thank you, thanks, Fem, man.

So then we know that You know there's nowhere to go. So just has nothing else to do. So she's like, okay, well, what about Jacqueline? Nah, and apparently Jacqueline called begging to say sorry, but Me, I won't give her that that time, you know? And so then they start going over penis straws and like the bachelor at party stuff and Jiselle drinks from a white penis straw. And he is like, out of all those comments, why don't you take the purple longer on?

Yeah, so we just have to have, we have like a long close up of Jiselle, essentially, fileting her straw. And then we go over to Wendy, who's setting up a ring camera, because she's about to do an appearance on MSNBC And she's reminding herself of her talking points and she's like okay, Roe v. Wade the importance of the supreme court decision Okay, consequences full America and I was like I love that juxtaposition of like me and just helping like yeah

She touched my cookie. She liked the little here's a penis draw. Oh, it's a penis draw to Wendy being like having to talk about consequential issues that are impacting all of America. Yeah. Um, so yeah, it's like penis draws to Roe v Wade. So yeah, Wendy is setting up her computer. Wendy, you need to put your computer higher. I don't know if you've been doing this for so long. How are you still looking terrible on the camera? Your gorgeous, put your camera on a fucking camera stand. I mean, you're your laptop on us. Laptop, get a stand.

I mean, what are you looking at? Nobody needs to be on TV like this. There's what I think about Roe. Here's his weight, it's terrible. Come on. I would love, I would love a talking head who spoke like that. Come on. I would love it. I would love it talking to you, spoke like that. Here's what I think.

Here's what I think. So Wendy, she tells us that basically, she doesn't have an issue with Robin, and it's very clear that Robin's going out of a way to have an issue with her. And at this point in her life, she's just like, she's not gonna bother people, we're not gonna meet halfway.

So she's just gonna move on in a positive way and she doesn't wanna bring negativity to her life. She's like, I don't wanna have any negativity in my life, so I'm gonna go on to cable news and argue with people because there's no negativity or toxicity on cable news. Yeah, I'm sick of fighting and I'm sick of negativity. Let's talk about Roe versus Wade. I know.

Let's talk about row versus way. I know. Let's talk about the general dysfunction in this country that this reality show is supposed to be distracting us from. All right. So then we go to Basher up, Hardie and I. Sorry, everybody's showing up and the color is lavender. I don't know why I thought that was funny. I've just never heard that as a theme color before. Lavender. Lavender.

Hey everybody, show up to this sexy party and lavender. I feel like it's a bad sign when the color theme also contains the word lav. So, Jacelle shows up. She's in her lavender dress and everything. She's got her money gun, all that stuff. There's a sprinter bus. Everyone's getting on the bus. And Mia's wearing this purple bodysuit

with a purple pattern snake skin bodysuit. And then Ashley shows up in the exact same bodysuit. People were posting this all over the internet aside by side with Fashion Nova where they both got this from. Ella, I love you, internet. God. I love you. I love you. God, I love you. I wish I could fake Mary you and Jamaica after somebody else's wedding.

I wish I could like your vagina and be like, it was just like a fun thing just to touch it and be like, your vagina's pretty internet. You know, so then Ashley says that, you know, Ashley and Mia are wearing the same thing It's like oh my god and Ashley's like obviously me and Mia are former host because he takes a home mentality to wear this Oh see ho, oh see ho so Did Ashley ever admit to being a stripper? How I guess was that a rumor that she was a stripper? Yeah back in the day. Well, that's what Joe was just always trying to insinuate, right? It should have some kind of hooker stripper or something.

Oh, it was a long time ago. Where's season seven? I mean, my kids are grown in office school now. It's been a long time. Um, I just like the I just like the admitting things and then acting like that's always been on record. You know, Mia does that all the time. Or she's like, yeah, I was a stripper. You do not remember having a fit all last year. Anyway, so Mia's like, yeah, well, we both worry about, come on, I worry about her. I mean, Ashley looked like a garden snake and I was an anaconda baby, no comparison.

look like a garden snake and I was an anaconda baby no comparison. Yeah, well, either way, then more people start to show up. Candace arrives. Candace is wearing like a, like a catwoman kind of black leather, black, I don't know if it's leather, shiny vinyl, vinyl thing. Sherees shows up. Sherees again, just looks like she looks like she just finished doing some grocery shopping, she just looks exhausted. Like a long, so weird shopping spree.

Like she went to three different stores to find the thing that she wanted, she didn't even find it, and now she has to go to the bachelor's party. Her outfit's weird, it looks like, yeah, it definitely is like eggplant like eggplant in a garbage disposal. It's not lavender Okay, it's a very odd odd choice. So She's like I should have been the one throwing the party because I've known her the longest But I couldn't because Mia who's known the for two minutes had to do it and to tell is the bestie Thaw's of my feelings, but I didn't show it. But I'm not saying on this bus, that's for sure. Hello, Gwayhouse,

weathervation. Hello, super shuttle, weather vacants. So everybody does cheers and Sherees does do the cheers. She's like, I wish you the Vapy myth, love, and maybe even the baby. And we'll say, oh geez. No more. We should also mention that Robin was wearing a crazy green outfit. And like, there was some discussion in my household that maybe it was like the Adidas by Beyonce,

Kolaab or the Ivy Park thing. So I was like, well, I'm not gonna make fun of it, because if it's Beyonce, I don't want to like get on the bad side of the B-Hop. But I've been looking on the internet, and I have not found, and when I do like Adidas and Beyonce and Green, I have not found any evidence that what Robyn was wearing is nails from Beyonce.

So I feel like that makes it open season to be like, it looks crazy. You know, that can still look crazy, even if it's from Beyonce, listen, nobody can be like it looks crazy. You know, this can still look crazy even if it's from Beyoncé. Listen, nobody can be off just limits. You just can't say it. No, you can be off for this. You sure can.

Well listen, the B-Hive, you don't want to mess with the B-Hive, okay, because if you're gonna be like, that looks stupid, that was made by Ivy Park. You're like, the podcast is done. Like, we're done, our show is off here. We're not getting on the bad side of Beyonce, okay? And definitely not over Robin Dixon. Yeah, I'm a Robin Rooms at all.

You know it might be funny, but it might just be a fitting end. Robin brings it down. Robin Rooms is all crashing down. Yeah, so Karen and Ray are in the candle place, okay? And Karen's like There's just two people in an office. Can we calm down? The 13th floor of, you know, Roanoke Virginia or something, I don't know.

So Karen is like, she's like, well, I'm not missing anything called Robyn's Batch Red Party. I'm making coins, literal coins made of wax with little wicks on them. I call them coin candles. They don't work as currency in an incarnation, but I still call them coins. And I have tried to buy many things within and been rejected rejected but I try and I will always continue to try.

So the guys like oh so just so you were able to know this is the final sample, the one with a ribbon so they bring out this big gold tin thing with a ribbon and then they open it and saluminum on the inside so it's only gold on the outside, which already I'm like, come on. What the hell is this? Is it gold or not? Let's commit here. Don't open it up and now I can wrap a castle roll in it. Is this tin foil or what?

What? Gold. Yeah, gold all the way through, but this is Karen's limited edition for WIC candle. That's exclusive for the holidays. Which holiday? Well, that's going to be up to you because according to Karen she says, hmm, what makes this special? Is that is limited for the holidays? I can have it for Christmas or for Bandai's Day? Maybe even Mother's Day? Orbeday? Orbeday's going to talk like a pirate day. Good time to have it for a you. Easter weekend. The thing don't you much do now about the Bohemian is it is a three-week and

this is a four-week. So it goes from Bohemian fire to Bohemian fire. We still don't know what Bohemian fire means by the way. And as people who have been in Hollywood while the cities on fire, I just don't like the name. It just sounds like, you know, out of work actors who just lost their affordable housing. That's what it smells like to me.

Yeah, I mean, Karen, have you been to a party at an artist's loft? I mean, that's basically what the scent of an artist's loft. Yeah, but he me and is a style. It's not a scent You know and even if it were a scent like Karen is like the last person who's the ambassador for bohemian style Yeah agreed So let's see so yeah, she's going on and on about her candle and she's like, well as you know, Milo, Milo, it's me Karen. Now we did put in a second order for the three weeks. So what I'd like to do is put in an order for 8,000 and put a deposit of $10,000

to get the ball rolling. I've got George Washington's pen here and I would like a ray to present Milo with a check. Could you do that and get a picture of Ray? Do you have the big one, the poster board? The poster board one, right? Come on, Ray! It's like, okay Karen, we got it. So she sends a picture of her handing over a check to somebody to send to Robin. handing over a check to somebody to send to Robin. Just want to have them have some signing a check in an office building. Anyway, Milo, congrats for reuniting with your family. I'm sure they were all very happy. He's like, uh, you're talking about the movie Milo and Oda. Sorry on shoot.

Yes, I am delightful movie. Congratulations. So then we cut to Mia on a pole and everybody's screaming on the party bus and Canvas is like now I have a question. Do they do strippers wipe down their own pole and ask you say oh give me a break you've touched worse babe. She's like I have not. You've been drunk somewhere, you put your hand somewhere, and we come on. Yeah. And Robin is like, well, the word on the curb is that Wendy and me are left together in Mexico. And she goes, yeah, they were kissing and then me attached to vagina. And Ashley, so by the way, this is how I like the rumor to be delivered. I don't need all of the, so I heard there was a little touching of the cookie

I just want a Shaw shot delivery of like so I heard you touch each other the dinos what happened Just get right to it, you know, so me as like well fam we did kiss and like her Me and Wendy we could at the same time and it was like really fun Hang I know and I love people like Candace who are like oh my god strippers polls are so dirty Are also the girls who are like let's quadruple make out Yep, so they all arrive at the Empire gentleman's club and and I liked like that it's not Empire. It doesn't have an E on it. It's just Empire. Oh, I like that. Empire. Empire. Empire. So I just sort of,

I guess, added the E because I just could not deal with that. No, they call it the Empire Club. That's what they called it. I just thought it was funny. Yeah, they're like, it's Empire, but not with an E. Well, it could have been for umpires. Not emperors. Umpires, gentlemen's club. It's only strippers. Just strippers with big knots. He squat on the ground and like shoot numbers. Like, you just say safe.

So, you're out of here. Wait a minute. There's no touching and you got to be wearing a mask made out of here. Wait a minute, there's no touching and you gotta be wearing a mask made out of metal. All right? They're just strippers with those big, those big gray, protect body protectors. They just take them off structively. Instead of doing a fan dance, they've got the foam things

that just hold in front of each other. Yeah, it's just big, it's just big fat guys. And just squat on the ground. I like that. I'm pious. Um, so why are they in a girl strip club? Aren't there any guy strippers? I mean, what the hell?

I know it's generally unfair because no town really has a male strip club, right? Even in West Hollywood, you just go see go-go boys kind of dance around on tables, right? There's no like actual strip club. I mean, Atlanta had swinging Richards, but that closed down. So that was the only one. I guess there was one in Fort Lauderdale too. But there's no other like men, there's no male strip clubs anywhere.

I feel like it's because men will just show you their shit for free anyway. Like, and women will, you know, men, men, you can see a man's stuff anytime, just say, hey, I heard you had a small one. Oh yeah! It's not worth anything. We don't have any self-worth, man, when it comes to stuff.

Yeah, so they're at a lady's strip club, and so there's like stripping, and there's like a lot of strip clubs and stuff, and I mean, a lot of stripping, a lot of footage. I mean, they did, I have to say the editors did a great job of really coming, showing as much of those bodies without having to pixelate anything. Like I was very impressed with their ability to get as much flesh on the screen as possible. Yeah, they really did, because those were naked naked.

That wasn't naked, that was naked. There was like a lot of nakedness. It was a long, loved it. So they're having a good time and Mia's saying that she's the one who shut it down with Wendy, which is her, Mia's so full of shit. I know. And then Candace is like, licking vagina. Is it commitment? I cannot commit to. And she's like, don't knock it till you've tried it. So they're just basically having fun

and me is giving her a judgement of the strip club. She's like, I wouldn't think Empire is the clansiness. I wouldn't think it's one of the fun clansiness if that makes sense. Sometimes I just come grab some food and roll out. I mean, what's wrong with that? It's a restaurant. Yeah, it looks very narrow in there by the way. I feel like a strip club should have

some like, wreath to it. And I felt like a, like a narrow corridor. That was my yelp review of it. So, um, so then the girls are asking Ashu, what's going on with Michael? And she's like, whoa, we've been trying to create a good environment. So there been like a lot of nice cities, which is her way of saying they've been fucking again. And we've been like very nice to each other and we've been, you know, nice. And Candace tells us she goes, if I had the opportunity to leave Gollum and take half of his money, bitch, where's the train? I'm getting on it. So they're like, so are you reconsidering actually and she's like i don't know

she's been so nice and uh... um... i was dating but then he said he wasn't dating so i broke up with my person because i felt like it was unfair that i was dating and he wasn't dating can't this is like please uh... he was in my man's restaurant with a bitch he came up to view he came up to view the other night with another woman and she was not cute according to Chris. Yeah, and Ashley's like, oh my God. Like Ashley is actually surprised by this. She's like, okay, okay.

Don't tell me one thing and then I hear another thing. Just be honest with me, it's like not fair. I'm like, Ashley, why would you ever think that Michael was gonna be monogamous with you in this in this separation state? Like of course he's gonna be with other way. He wasn't when you were married. Why would he be when you're separated? I'm like, come on. So it's this whole fake story because I don't buy this storyline really either, right? So then Sharice is like, though

You can't be mad because you're getting a divorce and I was like, wow, fun topic to bring up, Sharice. Really glad you're at this party, okay? Sharice started all this. So then the food comes and they're all owing and owing. I'm sorry, but that steak is some nasty. What was that? That steak, I have to say, the lobster tail looked fine. The lobster tail looked good, it looked juicy. I was, you know, I have to say, the lobster tail looked fine. The lobster tail looked good, it looked juicy.

I was, you know, I was very happy with the lobster tail. Sure, did it look like a powdered wig? Maybe, did it look like it might be signing the constitution perhaps, but it still looked good, but the steak, that just kind of had a hard time. It was a lucky puck. But they always did. Great like a round foe for the round.

The round is a hot-o. And it's like this one killed it for me. And it was a little mean. You lost, it was just, oh, no. It's a great like a young Foe the brown sauce the the sad kill that for me and a little me laugh it was just uh-hmm. No it's not good. Yeah. So uh Shasha's like so yeah. Shasha decides to to raise the stakes on the Karen story line these days because they're

like what? No pun intended. With that upon. So she's like someone asked her what like her thoughts on Karen on these days. She's like, I don't really think about her. The thing is I don't like that she lied. And like, what's your issue with me? From day one, I never add her shit. So you're going to have that thing in my fucking character? For what? When you know what you're doing, in fact, the last time I was at a club, I was with that bitch Karen Yuga and the grand freaking dog and the freaking girl disappeared. Karen, MIA, we're like, with Karen, with Karen, with Karen. And Candace is like, yeah, I hate when my friends do that off-suck and dick somewhere.

And she goes, uh, well, and Kaelin playing. And she's like, it is awan. It is awan. It is awan. NAH. And she's just like, yeah, in Potomac, she's known for someone who will get drunk and fucked up and fuck any dick that comes her way.

That's her reputation. She with fucking a worker in the bathroom. That's the fact. So am I supposed to be mad at Karen for this? Because Karen is even more of a hero to me right now. That's all. Like it is. So hot.

You know, Karen, I love that Karen does not give a fuck. Like she's older and she's like, yes, I'm still gonna just party my fucking face off and fuck random employees at their place of business. Yes, ma'am. Yeah, and so Candace is like, well, when was she fucking a bus boy in the bathroom? And Shasha says it's been happening ever

since they've been together as a group. And Jizelle was like, so even when she was making up shit about me last year, I still kept it, so then we get a flashback to you. I broke it off, I'm hampton university. And that's not what that's why we're going to sing sing whatever she said. And Jizelle says, well, supposedly I'm a drunken whore from Hampton University, well, Karen, you're a drunken whore from nowhere university. Yaaah. And um, Robyn's, and you see here's the difference, uh, Giselle. Everyone knew Karen was kind of lying and then it came out that she was officially lying

and people were still on Karen's side and this like whore, whole, whole debate and we're still on Karen's side knowing that Karen Fucks randos and bathrooms like clubs, you know, it's a personality you need to pull it off You know having so Robin to Robin says that she heard the story a long time ago and then Ashley is her everyone's just basically says that they've heard things And some of them are being more coy than others, but they've all heard this and So Robin's so low, fucking Robin and Cherice are so fucking low. At least Karen will say it to your face.

You know, these two, it's like, let's have a whole group scene where we exclude the people we don't want and then tell everybody that Wendy's a lesbian and that Karen is cheating on Ray constantly. You know, that's just so low. At least have the nuts to do it in front of Karen. A mother's family first.

That's a good point. Yeah. So, yeah, and then basically they're saying, everyone's heard stuff except for Mia, and then a producer asks Mia if she's heard anything, and she goes, hmm, which means Mia's not heard anything. So, Ashley then, then they start talking about blue eyes and everything, which means me has not heard anything.

So, Ashley then, then they start talking about blue eyes and everything. And Shasha says, like, did you know that Ray Thetti hired a private investigator? And Ashley says that essentially Ray or told them that he called off the investigator because he found out who blue eyes was. No, no, they found out that Blue Eyes, the driver was harmless. And then Sharice goes, no, if not a driver, if a guy who worked at a hotel,

and she says, yeah, but Ray knows what this is because for a long time Karen couldn't drive, her license got taken. Whatever, I don't know, she could do you why. She's trying to light another fire there, but it didn't really take off. Yeah, I mean mine God. They're really going there So then they're saying Ray picks her up and takes her around so is this a different? So they're saying Ray

Bigger than he takes at a hotel or whatever and then Mia is like wait So are you guys saying that Karen's a prostitute? I'm like whoa whoa whoa Mia, Mia too far, too far in the embellishment here. And she's like, yeah, because all I hear is that someone was working to door at a hotel and Rey was her pant. And they're like, geez, now you're just picking shit up, Mia,

geez. Yeah, this is insight into how Mia interprets things. So Mia says, well, I ain't talking about it with Gornium, and he said that most men that are older and have their younger wives, they get to a point where they know they can't, these are wives anymore,

and since they really love their wives, they say, go ahead and do. And maybe race at the same thing to Karen, because obviously, we can't get up the steps the way Gorn can. Hi, fam. So then they have more drunk and parting and giving Robin shots down her face

and then Robin gets up on the pole and it's the first time I've ever seen an entire strip club fall asleep at the same time. Really weird. Everyone's being sexy on the pole and Robin is on that pole like a firefighter. She's just like, ooh, just swinging around in the very like mechanical way. So it just sounds like, well success.

Get the bride drunk. Chakka. Eat, steak and lobster. Chakka. Sea strippers. Chakka. Find out Karen's a prostitute. Chakka.

Allegedly. Great night had by Allah. So next week is the season finale, and it's going to be Candace's album covered reveal for the deep space, redelux, deep space, the luxe album. And it looks like everything goes to shit. So that's going to be fun to watch. And can't wait, cannot wait.

Yes, we'll be here. Well, everybody, thanks so much for being with us today. We'll be back all week. We're live in Austin, Thursday, and Dallas, Friday. So those recaps are going to be real house-wise of Miami followed by Salt Lake City. So those recaps will be a little bit behind, and that is why if you want more, come over to patreon.com.

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