Watch What Crappens - RHOP: Sexual Healing, Mental Scarring

Episode Date: October 26, 2021

The Real Housewives of Potomac is wrapping up, and so we've got an episode of odds and ends: Ashley trying to be intimate with Michael (yikes), Gizelle finally addressing her emotional coldness, and Wendy doing a photo shoot. Good times!Be sure to join us for our 10th Anniversary tour here:https://www.watchwhatcrappens.com/10th-anniversary-hunky-dory-tour/See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Get ready for a double load of Queen of Hearts! It's me, Jujubee, and I return to guide sexy singles through some ronchy blind dates. Cameras off! Voice only! Launching during Pride! Queen of Hearts takes Miami by storm, with Daeders Cupi from Tampa Bayes, Just Chaz, and Brittany Brave to name a few. Follow Queen of Hearts on Amazon Music or wherever you get your podcasts. Watch what crap is, watch what crap is, who cares what happens when there's so much that crap is

What happens Crab Hello and welcome to Watcher Crapins, a podcast about all that crap on Bravo that we just love to talk about. I'm Ben Mandelker and I'm having some good vibes only with my dear dear friend Ronnie Karam. What's up, Ronnie? JVL bad somehow What are you doing today? Why do I keep thinking of extra virgin olive oil every time they say GVO?

It doesn't make sense, but that's all I can think of every time they say it because it's when ritual when ritual race has EVO so I think that the GVO sort of goes in that place, but to be fair, extra virgin olive oil usually gives me GVO. So it makes sense. Well everybody, welcome to the show. Thank you so much for being here. It's real housewives of Potomac Day. Go get tickets for our live show over at watchwitcraftens.com. We start touring again in January in New York City with the Golden Crappie Awards. So that's gonna be fun. And then we're gonna take a seat still every Monday night.

So come join us for that. That's at 7 p.m. Pacific and 10 p.m. Eastern time. It's on the green room at by Spotify. And basically download this app. You can sign in with your Spotify account if you want, or if you don't have one, just make a free account. The app is free. The account is free. Thanks. Free guy. And then join us at 7 p.m. and search for Ben Madelker or Ronnie Caram. Follow us. And then you'll see our show starting on the main page. It's called Take a See.

You guys come up and talk to us. We talk about Bravo stuff and really whatever you guys want to talk about too. So join us, won't you? And I also just want to say about our ticket sales. We are really hashtag blessed that everyone has been super supportive. But like, we do recommend you check it out now because actually some of the venues are like really selling well. And I already know some people who are like oh my God I thought I could wait and actually most of the seats in that place are gone so just like at the very least just check it out to make sure you can keep tabs on those venues if you need to like take a moment to decide whether or not you it's something you can do or not but like I don't want anyone to be blindsided but

some of the venues are like selling very very quickly So just give me a heads up about that and today We are here with the pen ultimate real housewives a Potomac episode of this season and it begins with the resolution of last week's cliffhanger which was Gordon and Ashley fighting in a van about her one's nap. And guess what happens when the episode begins? They get home. They get home. Yeah, it's over. It's over. They just get home.

They get home. So Wendy calls out the dinner set 730 and Karen's like, great job, Wendy. Great job job wonderful work. Great job today. Wow, GBO. GBO. Am I right, everyone? GWO. Great wicks only. Am I right? GSEO. Great Siri Counties only. So Chris says, God, everyone's exhausted. And she's like, that's what happens when you GBO. Mm-hmm. Or go on a group trip with Candace. So then, yeah, everyone's just kind of like, doing their thing, Ashley's pulling out some baby formula

from the fridge. Robin and Mr. Bulls. Mr. Bulls, Robin and Chazelle are still miserable, as usual. They're up in their little attic room. And just like, I mean, how much would it cost to open this door and use it as a bathroom? This is ridiculous. They wanted us to stay in here. Yeah. But ultimately though, they're getting the shit done that they said they

couldn't get done. I put on makeup and stuff. And then some caterers arrive and Wendy talks with them and then I wrote down bins. There's some bins that are arriving. They got bins, more bins than you could even imagine. And then Karen and Ray are getting ready and she's like, I'm almost running Ray and he's just like playing where they're curling iron pretending that he's like, you know, shraining his hair and he's just like,

crack himself up. He's like, it's a curly guy, but I don't have hair. This is good, this is good, Karen. I loved Wendy testing out her comedic skills with the caterer because she's like, hey, and the lady is like, oh wow, this place is beautiful. She just, thank you. I decorated myself. And she starts cracking up at herself and the lady just stares back at her. Like, okay, so we're just going to go ahead and put the tables up and put the food on them. She's like, so we're going to serve ourselves. I don't have a joke for that. I know that you're waiting for a joke for that. You got to. Oh, there it is.

So let's see. So then Mia and G are coming down the stairs and he like linger on it like Remember remember the travesty of the lettuce remember and Karen and Ray come in and matching quite Fedoras and she says we come into the room doing the electric slide backwards Some people don't make it 25 years Jezele So we're gonna enjoy that. I mean, doing the electric slide backwards. It's dangerous. Don't try it at home. Jazzella will be alone forever. It's hilarious. I love the song because it reminds me of Ray Henlinger curling iron. You can do it, Ray. It's electric. Boogie, boogie, boogie, boogie.

So they all go outside for a nice sunset, crab oil, and romantic music plays. And everyone makes fun of a scholar because she's wearing like a big green fuzzy jacket. And I tell her she looks like the grinchy stole Christmas. Yeah. And it's cold outside. So Wendy has to make another toast. She's like, I'm making a toast to the Chesapeake Bay. I decorated it myself. It's a joke. Anyway, also the Candice's album, to whoever listens to it and Ray and Karen for their 25 years and for still doing the electric slide, even though we've sat down at the table, I didn't know you could do a C to the electric slide, but they're doing it. Congratulations.

And she's all grouchy. It's cold. I'm going inside. So he leaves and then, um, you know, they're making small talk because they're kind of bored at this point. And Canvas is like, so Karen, you're going to be a bride next time I see you. And she's like, Karen, I'm sorry, I wrote just out, but Karen says, yes, and if you could find a way to open your invitations outside, it's very important to Ray.

It's like, did Ray fart in a box is that what happened? And send it to you guys So then they're just like talking about the kids when these kids are having great time with grandma and so actually ask Eddie if he's actually heard from his mom since last season and believe it or not He she actually called him and they had like a little bit of a conversation and she asked about how the family was. So the door is open, like it's cracked open a little bit. Yeah.

So then Mia tells us, well, in your 12 or 15, two, it's important to have your parent and your life. And so she comes back out and he's like, oh God, I just want another drink. I mean, there's so much shit I could be doing right now, most likely sleeping. Yeah. And Wendy's like, uh,

Karen, can I borrow you and Eddie? Come on, let's go to the side and make a wacky joke. That's right in front of the entire table if they just looked over six feet. Come over here. So see, yeah. So, uh, Jizelle is like, well, gee, I thought you were going to apologize on all that, you know, now you're making sleeping jokes on. And

he's like, well, of course, I am. Because it's fun. Aren't we having fun? My sleeping jerks are killing it, right? Did you apologize that actually? Because that is an issue. And he's like, what's wrong with her? And after like, the bus when trying to sleep, uh, when were we on a bus? Do you have Alzheimer's or something? What's happening? And he was like, Ashley, that's not okay. Okay. Alzheimer's is a real issue. And coming from a female, it's married to an older man, Alzheimer's should never come command of your mouth. Okay, never all timers.

And Ashley's like, but I would say it to you too. I'm not a just. And she says, Ashley, if I hurt your feelings, I'm sorry. But I'm not sorry about what I said. Now, let's be done with it. How kind of thing is that to say? No, we're not done with it, sir. And Ashley goes, well, you don't need to add that part to it.

And he goes, well, it's the truth. And she said, well, then don't give me an apology at all. I don't need it. So he's like, what the fuck is going on? Meanwhile, Wendy and Eddie have pulled Karen aside because they've got a big cake for her to pop out to you. Because remember when they were talking about the Bachelorette party and Ray had told Karen that he wants a woman to jump out of a cake for him while Karen is the cake. It's happening.

Meanwhile, Mia's like, Alzheimer's is a real issue. She's like, all the Alzheimer's with a Z. I know what it's. It's a real is you. Okay. It's a real is you that people suffer from. If it was Alzheimer's with a Z, wouldn't it have a Broadway special?

Like Liza did. Thank you, the fans' rests. Well, I wasn't trying to be insulting, and you shouldn't say that someone has a disease like Alzheimer's when they're older. She said, well, I said amnesia first. I mean, do you have selective hearing? I know what I said.

You have an bronzer. I don't have to explain myself. Just so weird. Do you have selective hearing? Um, elective hearings are a real issue. Ashley, are you trying to unfairly redistricted it now? Like I said, what I said, I don't watch Ted Lasso. No, I didn't even say, were I didn't say Ted and I said nothing that even sounded like Lasso. I know what I said. I'm

really where's your husband? With my children. She is. Um, are you sure? We're just funny because like where's your husband is not the logical next step of this argument, but she just goes there. Talking about all timers. So then, um, Candace tells us she's like, well, Ashley thinks she could just pop up her chest. The girls and they'll take it. But honey, Mia is too big to sit back and take anything. She's going to let you have it. And I'm content to you. So big. She's not going to take anything besides delivery from the clothes for a giant store. I mean, you try and climb herping stocks. She's going to strangle your bean ass with it. All right. Um, by the way, Jizelle started this fight. So let's just, yeah. Just to point that out. Listen, I didn't forget I do not have all timers. Okay. So then Ashley is like, uh, she's like, do you have anything else to say?

You obviously have an undertone and we can make it an overtone. We don't need to talk about copper tone right now. The sun is not that strong. And she's like, Ashley, do you need a hug, dear? You know what she needs? Dick. That's what she needs. Uh, bin black dick. You should try and ask. So then Robin hugs Ashley because she doesn't

want to hug from Gordon. So Robin gives her a hug. And then, um, Mia tells us, girl, we're on a couple strip. Why haven't I met your husband? Are you embarrassed by him? Plus we're on freaking vacation. Why are you sleeping anyway if you're so damn tired? Take your ass back home. I'm like, she just gave birth. She has a newborn. Of course she's tired, Mia.

And Ashley says, well, my issue is that you wouldn't stop. That's all I said. And he's like, look, I don't give a shit. I'm sorry how it made you feel. She's just, thank you. I'm glad you can remember it now. Ha, ha, ha, ha. Meanwhile, the cake rolls up. And by the rolls up, I mean, it's basically like How it made you feel just thank you. I'm glad you can remember it now Meanwhile the cake rolls up and by the rolls up. I mean, that's basically like Eddie and Wendy running with a giant cake The cake has like little Karen legs under it. This big running cake

It looks like a mascot for like a very very minor league baseball team and It's a cake with a wig that could fly off at any moment. The Potomac cakes. It has three candles to represent each wig. And it's so windy, it's like, Ray, now I know you told Karen you want the woman to jump out of the cake and the Ocephos, listen, here's your cake, I decorated it myself. Pauseful laughter. Okay. The caterer is just standing in the corner giving her a dirty look.

Like, come on, I hate her jokes. Come on, I hate her jokes. She used the same punchline over and over again. It becomes worse and worse with every context. Ray's like, I've got one question. Is she naked? And everyone kind of laughs, but it's Ray, so. So then Karen jumps out, she's like, mm, hey, baby, anything for you, baby, mm, like sent moving to Florida, or, you know,

downsizing, etc. I will jump out of a half a cardboard cake for the grocery store. And she's all goes, Karen, not this was terrible. You should be naked with whipped cream on your nipples I Just envision that now it's killing me so Karen's like God forbid I pop out in front of G I mean that man was licking after me Yeah, so then Wendy gives herself a 10 tens across the board for being a hostess and she says that she made sure everyone had a good time Even though she had to deal with two petulant children, but she whipped them into shape. Yeah, and someone's like,

I need to find out what Alzheimer's is. It was lost in my nuts. So then Robin says, this trip was horrible. I don't feel like having a conversation with Wendy because she's all horrible hostess. And Mia and Gordon are still talking and Mia's like, Mia's like, I don't get any issues with your friends.

And he's like, yeah, I don't, and I don't need you to defend me because I wasn't defending you. I was defending everyone who has all timers. So then back in Potomac, trip sober. So it's two days later and Wendy and Candace are hanging at Wendy's house and Mia and G are talking so we're cross cutting back and forth between the two houses. And Wendy's like, there's no goat meat, you know, there's no, there's no wise and Candace is like, well, I enjoyed myself on that trip.

I mean, Gordon is a grade A o lunatic. And then we have Mia talking to Gordon and Gordon's saying how he basically hasn't been out of the house since March 2020 and he was gonna have a good time no matter what and then all of a sudden doorbell rings and then packages arrived and it's Karen's invitation to her Valoranol and Karen tells us well you know the Valoranol is a very special invitation come from the heart of Surrey County USA and I was hoping this would touch their hearts in a very, very special outdoorsy way. So then, just as I was like, we're supposed to open this upside and Robin's with Juan who is using a face roller on his face. But it looks like a tiny little paint roller. It's not the face roller we learned about on Real Housewives of Beverly Hills.

This is like, if you had a dollhouse and you were painting all the window sills, it looked like a little dollhouse roll. It was a little broom from TV's bloopers and practical jokes. Those guys who came on screen, you like got me, like pulled it off the TV and put it on his face. So Robin opens it and a butterfly flies at and Robin, of course, it's a shocker what Robin does. She goes, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh what Robin does. She goes, and then just look at it and she goes, she sent us mothballs at her daughter's like, mom, their butterflies, they're just dead.

Dead butterflies, more butterflies. The seven Ashley calls Robin and she's like, did you get this invitation? And Robin's like, the mom. Yeah, and just I was like, Karen thinks that this is grand. This is what the grand dom does. Girl, just give me a text. And I have to agree with her on this point. Like, because I probably would have forgotten

to open it outside and I probably would have opened it up and at best butterflies would have flown around and I would have gotten really annoyed. I don't want butterflies inside my house. Yeah, nothing says like here's to a special next 25 years with my old ass husband, then a box of dead butterflies. Yeah. It reminds me actually know it.

This reminds me of, oh, never mind. I was going to remember Game of Crowns. There was, there was like a very intense release of doves for a wedding Valoranule by Lindy Amante and there's like a million doves. It doesn't. It's really not not essential to the rest of this recap. I'll just move on. Unless some of them were dead They probably died probably died. Got to be That's kind of the the winning argument here dead butterflies come to my wedding. So Mia's like, well, I can see where Karen was going with that because in marriage,

you turn into a cocoon, right? Because you're like a butterfly and then you turn into a catter dealer. Is that right? Is that what happened? That right. Is that what happened? And can and can and the can the cat of dealer then then it grows up and has to fight guns that are and it's like very dangerous for humans. Don't don't listen. Don't make me go back to kindergarten. So Mia's sitting down with G and she's like, well, it feels good to be home. I was done starting about the cans. And he's like me too, very much so. And now we know it was for a very good reason. And now I don't want to put your mom on blast because she is your mother. I know. I'll let you do that.

I'll let you do that. I'll let you do that. I'll let you do that. I'll let you do that. I'll let you do that. I'll let you do that. I'll let you do that. I'll let you do that. I'll let you do that. I'll let you do that. I'll let you do that. I'll let you do that. I'll let you do that. anniversary. Okay, so these two fuckers go out of town and leave their kids with her mother for the

first time. And then they come back in and decide, you know what, let's keep vacationing. So then they get a hotel and decide to do another vacation for their anniversary. So Veronica apparently started texting incessantly because she was overwhelmed. And then she got an argument with Gordon because she couldn't decide what to feed the kids that night. So then Mia decided to like come home from the hotel two hours after they had left. And Gordon had tried to call her, but she wouldn't answer so they came home.

And you know, basically they got into a big fight in front of the kids and Mia was really frustrated. And she's like, well, when my mom gets upset, she leaves and I've seen her leave me as a child and I was not gonna let my children experience any of that, even though I did just technically leave my children just been more time with my husband. Yeah, no sit on two trips in a row.

Also, I'm team your mom on this one. You guys are assholes. Like she just did you a huge favor, then you're making her stay for another two days or whatever. And then G calls and gives her attitude. He said that he called her, of course, he doesn't say what he said, but he called her all pissed off because of phone kept beeping. And she said, gee, these are your kids and then hung up on him and got all mad. So I'm team mom.

I feel like there probably is another side of the story here for sure. Yeah, with your free baby sitting, you fucking ingrates. Yep, enjoy that. So now they feel like they're back to Ground Zero, not Ground Zero, Square One. Ground Zero, who said Ground Zero? Someone said that on the show recently. So they're back in Square One.

Celebrity Beef, you never know if you're just gonna end up on TMZ or trending on Twitter or in court. I'm Matt Bellasai. And I'm Sydney Battle, and we're the hosts of Wonder Woman's new podcast, Dis and Tell. Each episode explores a different iconic celebrity feud from the buildup, why it happened, and the repercussions. What does our obsession with these feud say about us?

We're starting off with a pretty messy love triangle between Selena Gomez and Justin and Haley Bieber, a seemingly innocent TikTok of Selena talking about her laminated eyebrows. It snowballed into a full-blown alleged feud. But it doesn't seem like fans are letting up anytime soon. Despite both Selena and the Bieber's making public statements denying any bad blood. How much of this is teen jealousy and lovers quarreling, and how much of it is a carefully crafted narrative designed to sell albums?

Follow this and tell wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen ad-free on the Amazon Music or Wondery app. With mom. Here comes one right now. Now, Jezelle goes over to a nursery, a plant nursery with her girls, because she's trying to figure out, pick out some shrubbery and flowers to go alongside the driveway, and she's like, you know, things like this, and she points at like some greenery and the girls like no that's all the mom don't you want color god mom the house is already plain looking basically jazel still can't shoot in her house so they're at this flower place for her kids to just

read her for filth that's another like jazel just gets ripped shreds ripped to shreds by her kids yeah exactly and so they're just like then like jazel's like what about these these are nice because she gets ripped to shreds by her kids. Yeah, exactly. And so they're just like, then she's like, what about these? These are nice. Mom, those are disgusting. They're like little, like lovely little chefs. You know, like, gosh, mom.

So she's like, well, should I bring a date to Karen's things? I'm like, no, mom, no. Not if you don't know them. She's like, true, but what do you kids think of me dating? It's like, oh, God, Giselle, again, okay. So they're just out of shit for the season, right? Yeah, we still got time till Karen.

So we still got an extra episode. So just kids, go out and give your mom shit. Okay, Giselle, pretend that you're going to start dating again. Let's go into a nursery. Okay, guys, we're shooting in a nursery. This is where we mom shit. Okay, just out pretend that you're gonna start dating again. Let's go into a nursery Okay guys, we're shooting in a nursery. This is where we're at, okay? So the whole like do the kids care if I date and so they're like no, I mean look We just don't want to see you alone in gross mom. Yeah, we don't want to see you die alone mom I know and and

Yeah, you're pretty lonely. She goes, well, I'm casually dating. And the one of the daughters is like, but don't you want, do you want a serious relationship? She's like, no, not right now. So while you're dating, mom, gosh. And the producer asks herself, so who is this man that you're casually dating?

And she's like, none of your business. And I don't believe her. She's just like would everybody get off my ass? Is there something wrong with a woman who like has worked just bought a house, wants to sit on her ass and watch some Netflix alone with some ice cream? Can you get off my ass? Or a woman who's done all those things and maybe just wants to get a little booty on the side, right? So, so, uh, so then, Jacelle's like, well, uh, you guys are going to be dating very soon, uh, and if you're already, uh, if you're not already, Grace Jacelle, Brian, daah! I don't want you guys to be that way, by the way, and, you know, she starts saying how it's like,

the girls are basically like, it's, well, it's hard for us because we don't see new relationships, and like, we, it's like, we can't look up to you and dad. So we don't really understand dating and love and relationships and all this stuff, you know, because you guys fucked us up. And she's like, wow, this is worse than my time. And Angel says, yeah, it's just going to be harder to ever have a decent relationship. No problem. Don't worry about it, mom.

We're just never going to find love because you're so dead inside. Yeah, like yeah, it's just gonna play us for the rest of our lives. She's like, well, here's the thing. I could have discussed with your father to make our relationship better But I didn't and that's on me. I could have said for example, ah, I don't love you cheating with people in the church My bad should have just told him. I'm sure all would've been fired if I just said something. Ah. I am like Kathy Dennis. Ah, I was born with walls.

Ah, and I didn't know that they were, what they were until my children were saying them to my face. Ah. Grace goes, well, right now it looks like you're kind of a vampire mom. And, you don't have any feelings.

Yeah, like you really don't have any feelings. She says, um, well, except that mommy is going to do better in intercos. It's been 50 years of struggle. Well, I guess it's been my fault. Ah, that I didn't show you the twilight vampires with emotions. Ah, oh, yeah, I love this. I love this, I love this. Well, that may also be just what it feels like to work at Arizona's.

So Ashley, now we go to Ashley, who's going to the therapist, but she's bringing little baby Dylan, little baby Dylan coming along. And the therapist is like, you can see the therapist is like, oh God, another fucking baby of therapy. Just what I need. It's okay, no breakthroughs today. Cancel that one off my list. We'll just try to get through this hour.

Well, whatever you need to do to feed him, I just want you to be comfortable. And the baby's like, do you now? Get the buffet on buttons, on first and line? There's nothing earlier than this bird, baby. They analyze this bitch. What is Freud have to say about? Why? Why? So Ashley is telling us that she saw Dr. Donna before and it was when she was in postpartum last time and you know she was also good with helping her mend things with Michael and

then we see just a clip of Michael going the biggest thing I feel wrote now is complete isolation. Where, where, where, where, where, where, where. So, um, uh, so basically the doctors, uh, like they're talking about how he's just like, uh, not feeling Michael is not feeling the need for intimacy or like he's, when, when I was just trying to do things, he's kind of like, been like, I, I can't do this right now or whatever. So the insinuation is essentially like, at around this time in the pregnancy last year, or post pregnancy, that's when he cheated.

And if he's not looking for intimacy, I think the suggestion is, is he getting it from somewhere else? So, right. And you can see the look in Dr. Donna's face. It's like red flag, red flag. She just has the red flag emojis as eyeballs right now. She's like, well, red flag. She just has the red flag emojis as eyeballs right now.

She's like, um, well, maybe he just doesn't mean, and maybe your sex addict husband just doesn't need it right now. So have you tried asking him to go, yeah, I've asked him and he said he doesn't. So I should just trust him. Okay. If that's what you're saying, she just, well, does it feel like he's being truthful because you know, you should check him on him by check him on him I mean you have an air tag on his car, right? Do you still might have a fucking air tag on his car? Here's what I want you to do. I want you to go home and listen to the Carrie Underwood song before he cheats and then think about getting a Baseball bat and you know, just prepare yourself.

Yeah. And Ashley's like, well, I mean, I do check in with him, but I just always talk about the kids because you know, it's all I really like to talk about. And she's like, well, you know, it's probably good to have some FaceTime with, you know, Michael. Come on, Ashley. And she's like, yeah, but one of our promises was to have eight nights, you know, Michael. Come on Ashley. And she's like, yeah, but one of our promises was to have date nights, but I get nervous. I mean, what if it's awkward?

I don't remember how to be romantic. Is it like riding a bike? No, it's not like riding a bike. It's like riding an old wagon made of alligator cartilage with watery eyes and a wheel falling off. Okay. You're riding Michael. That is no bite.

Definitely not. and a wheel falling off, okay? You're riding Michael, that is no bite. It's definitely not a bite. So now we go to a photo shoot for Wendy's candle and it's her mom, Susan. And Susan, like, is this flower sanitized? Or she says, I cleansed it with the blood of Jesus Christ or whatever. Oh, because the kid has a flower in her mouth. And so the mom's like, it's that sanitize.

I cleans it with the power of Jesus Christ. Yeah, the power and not the blood. So then we find out that basically Eddie did everything that Wendy was not doing, like create a business plan and look into finances to get this thing up and going. And so now they're doing a photo shoot, which I hate, I hate the entire artistic direction

of this entire photo shoot. And so then when Susan doing a photo shoot, which I hate. I hate the entire artistic direction of this entire photo shoot. And so then when Susan is like, Miguel, did you, you went to school for photography? Yes. And he goes, actually, I went to school for engineering. I was like, well, this makes sense because this is not a very good photo shoot. And when he's like, of course, he's African, did your parents tell you you had to be an engineer? And he's like, yeah, pretty much. And Susan, the mom says, says oh all Africans do that and put the baton handed to me and that is what I did for my children. Yeah and she's like she's like everything I did for you growing up

was good and raising a kid is not to cook a cook a cut of process and you know you measure your process with the outcome. Cry now thank me later Because Wendy is just trying to fuck with her. This show is the best. And all the women want to fuck with their moms, right? I know. You're just fucking with them every single thing. Wendy's mom is great, though. Wendy's mom is great, though.

Yeah. She does not take any bullshit from her. I love it. And Wendy's telling Wendy tells her, well, you know, growing up in my jeer in household, you, you had very strict expectations, right, mom? Like I wasn't able to let's say chase my dreams earlier because I had to make you happy first. And she's like, okay, Wendy, okay.

Okay, Wendy. And Wendy just keeps going. And she's like, you know, with me and quarter, I did something to, like, you did something. And like I did something to him and I said to him, you this and later I found out he didn't do it and so I said I'm sorry and I felt because I was like well mom Mom has never said that she's sorry. She's oh be quiet Come on. Oh, when they don't you start with me right now when do you guys were always last sheet chosen? And I would come in and I would say I'm sorry

I left you left you guys alone Which by the way you know that season all said to not say that but I just love she's like oh don't give this to me now Like you're a fucking doctor you're on TV you were starting a A totally useless luxury brand like don't complain to me that I never said sorry Yeah, and she said and at one point in this conversation She says you know I believe that you measure the process by the outcome.

And Wendy's like, um, but us turning out so good doesn't mean the process was good. It kind of does. That is actually kind of what it means. I think when the parents, when the kids turn out good, the parents did a good job, right? Can the woman get any credit? I know.

And Wendy, so Wendy's like, you never said that, you never said those things and she just shut your mouth. I'm not always right, but I'm always telling you the truth. And I'm about to call an Uber and get out of here and she just puts on sunglasses. Like, I'll see you later. It's a big old diamond sunglasses. And she's like, I'm going. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. And even the photographer's like, I'm sorry. He's apologizing he wasn't even part of it. It's just like mom, you're in my shop. Well, sorry, sit down. She goes, no.

And she leaves. Hero of the episode, that lady. So now it's time for Ashley and Michael to rekindle that flame and get their sexiness on by going to the Watergate Hotel, the sexiest hotel in Washington. God. So she's saying, wow, this is so sexy. Look at that view. I'm going to put out Karen's candle because Santa would is a good afridiz yak. It's like does it strip because you're gonna need a

little more with Michael. All right. You know what I've always found to be an afridiz yak? Richard Nixon. Richard Nixon lying until there was evidence on tape. Wow, there are no similarities to this at all. Bob Woodward and Carl Bernstein are the sexiest man I can think of. Let's do it. So Michael comes and he's like, oh, well, look at you. This is very nice, very thoughtful. One of the best views in the country. Wow. Wow, I can't help but notice how lovely this complimentary pin is what a sexy time we're having. Oh, is that a doily underneath the glass? That's very lovely, very sexy times. And she's like, well, I wasn't sure how you feel about coming to the water gate. And then she

tells us, you know, that only is this famous in history, but Michael used to own it. It's like, wow, way to give a man a boner. You know, it's like, remember this place you had to sell to keep all the money. I'm only am I calling you out on you lying until you got caught on tape. But now I'm bringing you to one of your biggest failures to the hotel you tried to remodel, but ran out of money. Or what, how appropriate that Michael

and Richard Nixon share this common history together. I feel like we knew this at some point, maybe season one, but I totally forgotten about it, or maybe I'm just making that up. But I feel like Michael owning the Watergate Hotel says tells you everything you need to know about Michael. Right. He basically is a walking watergate hotel. So she's trying to be all sexy and he just keeps looking around at all the cameras and the lights. Like, it just looks like Am I supposed to fuck you like this? I can't fuck you on the couch at home, but now I'm supposed to fuck you with the camera crew in the watergate. Are you serious right now? But he's staying calm, you know, he's just looking all around. And because do you like cheesecake? It's he feeds him and he goes, oh, sure. Mm.

Very sexy. Very, very sexy. I think he's also on higher alert because he's afraid that like this will all be used against him in some way, because everything always is, because he knows that once he lets out his like, his like inner, inner like, wretch, that like he's just gonna do something terrible on camera.

So he's just being very clinical and he's like, this is very sexy. I love cheesecake. Cheesecake is a sexy cake of all the cakes. It is the sexiest. Thank you for treating me sexy cake in the water gate. Well, he's just looking around all watery eyes and red nose, you know?

And she's like, so thanks for taking the kids for that whole two and a half days. And he's like, right, right. Well, I thought you'd like to get lots of sleep. Hey, you know what we should do? Let's be quiet and listen to the background noise in this room. The background noise is like, booooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo Well, actually Chris said something that was rather surprising. He said he hoped that to move forward. And he's like, him having a wife that's been cruel and nasty. I don't need people like that because he wants to bury the hatchet. His wife pulled an iPad on you.

Is that the hatchet? Bomm, bomm, bomm. Shhh. Comedy on the fifth floor of the Watergate, everyone. It's like, I'm not going to waste my time on that. If I get to spend time with one, why would I spend a second with the others? I mean, one is interesting. We get long. He's gorgeous. He's got the eyes of a soul that seeps right through me. He's got a butt that's tighter than that.

Deck of a boat. He's got dimples so deep you can put maple syrup in them and dip pancakes in. You put your finger in saw and you turn your finger into a diamond. I mean the guy is just tired in my right wall is gonna be there is me and she's like okay you finally got a boner talking about one let's get this done. So she like swings her leg over here. I mean, she blindfolds him. She blindfolds him and it's like, she's like, how about this? I'm just gonna make my voice sound like Wands

and we'll just blindfold you and we'll just take it from there. So he's like, she's like, you're waking up, they get out of bed. This is unattractive. So give it to me, Wond. Let's have, let's talk about our bachelor party, which is the two of us and Vegas potentially showing a tub together. One.

And then the clip of Andy going, so did you actually say I would suck one's dick. Yeah. So he's like, so as she's on top of him and she's like I'm feeling very uncomfortable and then he is like then she's on top and he goes he's just saying things like very nice baby. Very nice. Thank you. This is such a beautiful lady. Wow. Great job, one. And so she's like let's go to the bedroom. So they walk in and they close the door and you think that you're going to start hearing all this sexy stuff. And he goes, wow, such a beauty.

Hey, did you see all those buttons mixed to the toilet? And she goes, well, okay, I'll be here when you're ready. And then he goes off to play with his ass and my fancy toilet. Yeah, pull the picture of Juan. So now we go to Jizal visiting our old therapist friend, Dr. Ken, and Dr. Ken has apparently been in high demand. A lot of people want to sit in that very cold and sterile room of his and share their feelings with him. I am questioning Dr. Ken's quality

as a therapist. I guess you probably are going to say I've been questioning him for many years, but now I feel like I really am questioning him because I feel like this was not a very good therapist session. So basically, Jacelle comes in and she's talking about how she needs to be, she wants to work on being more vulnerable because the girls are saying that she's emotionally unavailable, vampire, etc. And so Ken's asks her why Dr. Ken asked her why she reconnected with Jamal and she says that she's basically in a place where she wanted to take a leap and bring the family back together and Ken's like, was there a love for us and she's like, well, he was looking at me a little different, you know,

much more respect and by more respect, I mean no respect, but he had glasses now And before the pandemic we were seeing each other all the time because you know He needed his free refills at Arizona's, but then not being able to see each other made me look at him differently Maybe realize I do like my space and my freedom and also by the way He impregnated someone else. So yes, I want a man, but I just don't want to answer to one He had gone almost nine months out without from pregnanting somebody from his congregation. And I thought, wow, he's into me. And the doctor says, and he's like, well, but partnerships are about being accountable.

So if you don't want to answer to someone, I mean, listen, what message do you want to communicate to your kids about relationships? How about she's communicating that she's not taking any bullshit from some chronically cheating asshole of a man by leaving him? How about that? That's a good lesson. Yeah, exactly. And so he's basically saying that the kids are seeing her seeing her reconnect and falling apart, and then they're just wondering what love is and just like, just like, oh my god, this is horrible. And he says, and then they're just wondering what love is and just like, just else like, oh my god, this is horrible. And he says, maybe you haven't had honest, open conversations with them about what you're going through.

And she's like, yeah, I thought I was doing good job, but apparently I've had missteps on. So he goes, here's his great advice. Let your walls down. Because when you guys come down, it's like the bachelor, you know, it's like he's on the bachelor right now. That's his therapy.

Let your walls down. Oh, please don't knock over that. Ikea from 2020 or from 2010 behind you, you know, the silver tree that like has the, the see through branches with little lights at the end. I had that for years. God, I missed that lamp. Yeah. He's like, you know, when your walls come down, it's beauty that comes out and you have the opportunity

to make a major change and when your daughters grow up, they're gonna remember how they felt around you. I'm like, okay, that's fine and that's probably true, but that's why she's here, she knows that. You're supposed to tell her how to bring the walls down, okay? And you're supposed to tell her why she has walls up in the first place. And what those walls serve her and all this stuff,

but he's just like, let your walls down. I'm like, I'm sorry. Just, Ella, you just got therapy from like a sign at Marshalls. Yes, the bachelor I'm telling you. This is, they never tell you how the walls came down or anything. They just go, you know what?

You need to put your walls down and then you tell your put your walls down. I'm breaking up with you. And then you're supposed to come back and go, oh my God, I thought about what you said. My walls are down. They're like, oh my God, your walls are down. And then my walls are down. They're like, oh my concert was art town. And then you make out.

And then they go, you know what I really appreciate? I'm giving you this rose tonight because you showed vulnerability. Yeah. And that's what he says, where he goes, yeah. Let me tell you what I see in your eyes, vulnerability. And which by the way, that's his bullshit way of making it sound like his shit worked

because he just basically said I see vulnerabilities now She thinks oh, I'm being vulnerable. Wow doctor can as a good therapist. No, no, he sees it Yeah, they make you cry and then they call you vulnerable because now you're crying I mean you guys have treated her like shit the whole episode and now she's crying about it Everybody in this episode's been like you have no feelings. You're an actual vampire I'd you're never gonna find love and dialogue and And so she starts to cry, they're like, yes, that's all we needed from you. Some tears.

Fail, fail, fail. I give this one a big fail, Dr. Ken. Go to New Therapist. And that is the end of this episode. But man, next week looks really good. The season finale is good. Season finale will be fantastic. Oh my goodness, then we're gonna have Potomac reunion. We still have our Beverly Hills reunion. So,

everyone, everyone, thank you for listening. Here's what we have coming up later this week. We got the new season of below deck. We've got Vandipum rules. We got Beverly Hills. And we got Winterhouse. It is a full, full slate. And of course, we have Take a seat tonight, at 10 o'clock Eastern. And of course, come get tickets to our shows because we're going to have so much fun and we want to celebrate 10 years of podcasting. Gosh Ronnie, isn't that crazy? 10 years of podcasting. Oh my god, we're going to be celebrating 10 years of podcasting on the road. So please come celebrate with us because it won't be the same without you That's it everybody. We will talk to you later

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