Watch What Crappens - RHOSLC: All Eyes on Heather

Episode Date: December 22, 2022

It's a very special episode of Real Housewives of Salt Lake City where the women try to get to the bottom of both Heather's mystery black eye and Lisa's Barlow's SEC filing! Talk about bruising!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hey, Prime members, you can listen to Watch What Crapins Add Free on Amazon Music. Download the app today. Get ready for a double load of Queen of Hearts. It's me, Jujubee, and I return to guide sexy singles through some ronchy blind dates. Cameras off. Voice only. Launching during pride. Queen of Hearts takes Miami by storm, with Daeders' Cuppe from Tampa Bayes, Just Chas, and Brittany Brave to name a few. Follow Queen of Hearts on Amazon Music or wherever you get your podcasts. Hello and welcome to Watch Our Crapins, a podcast about all that crap on Bravo that we just love to talk about. I'm Ben Mandelker and joining me today is the one and only master of all the fish. Mr. Ronnie Kerim, hi Ronnie, how are you?

Well, hello, Ben Juni, Don. You're excited. I'm just what I'm doing is I'm here. It is for us. It is like that last day of school before you go on break, because this is our last recap that we're recording. We're still gonna have shows up for the next week and a half,

but this is the last show that we're actually recording, recording until January 3rd, but we are gonna have, we have like a four-part recap of following for Christmas, which is the Lindsay Lohan Christmas movie So be sure to watch that on Netflix. You can watch us. We were doing that with reality gays We already did it. It's so we had so much fun like it was like I think it was the most fun I person had doing one of our crossovers so far and then Next week after the reality gay stuff, we also have an interview with the one and only Anisha from Family Karma. So we talked some family karma. And then when

we in January, we are going to do a real housewives of Miami catch up app. We just did not have enough time, unfortunately, to recap each episode on its own, but we do a little catch up. We love it. We love it. We love it. Please do not take it as any sort of slight against the show, because we absolutely love it. So that's all the content that's coming up. And today we're talking real housewives of Salt Lake City and what a crazy chaotic episode before we recap it, though I do. I was feeling very reflective this morning, Ronnie. I was thinking back on this year that we've had here on a crap. It's been an extraordinary year. So I really want to thank everyone who came out to our 10th

anniversary show. I mean, we got to do that show. And we started off the year basically doing the town hall show, the crappies. We got to go back on tour. The show just sort of got bigger than it ever has before. It's really been a wonderful, wonderful year.

And Captain off, as I mentioned the other day, Captain off by getting two nominations for the I Heart Podcast Awards. So it's really just been extraordinary. So I'm feeling very sentimental and thankful right now. Yeah, it's a bit, you know, when you start the year on Broadway, you know, I mean, listen, 1923, I mean, 2023. Well, also 1923, hope you're doing great back then. No, such a depressing time.

But this 2023 is, you know, it's going to have a lot to live up to. For sure. But I believe in you 2023 and thanks to all of you for listening, you know, keeping us going, you know, I mean, thank you so much. You give us, you literally give us a life. Yeah, but relax. So thank you so much. Yeah, it's been great. And so this was really fun. This was a fun recap fun year. Basically Heather's not going to tell us who punched her and the show's over. Have a great holiday. We'll see you next time.

Good bye, everyone. Good night. See you on tour. Yeah, that's sort of what I, you know what, this is a great chaotic messy episode to sort of finish up our recaps of the year because wow, like just madness, pure, good class. This felt like season two again, you know? It's only season three. I know.

It's just, it's such a disaster. The show is a disaster and I love that we have a mystery now. Oh, oh, oh, something that has to be addressed. This is actually important. It's not, actually, I'm just kidding. It's not important at all. But I feel, I'm feeling a certain sense of guilt I feel like I've contributed to the downfall of our society because I made a little video last week

Where I joked about like oh my god I just took a second look at the mid season trailer and I saw something I never seen before and this the trailer shows Heather gay Going to her door opening a door at 4.50 in the morning and then it cuts right to her taking off the sunglasses and revealing her black eye. So I spliced in video footage of someone falling off a boat. I'm not gonna say where it's from because people may not know. So I'm gonna be respectful to that. But it's just someone falling off of a boat and the joke was, oh look that's how Heather got her black eye.

It has fake news. It was a parody by me. People are reporting it like this is what really happened to Heather. Like people are like, oh, at 4.50 in the morning, Heather left this house and went on to a boat and fell off and got a black eye. It's not. That didn't happen. Well, listen, bravo, we're bravo of yours. We know it's easy to pull the wool over. I've listened. Most of us still believe Doreet's rich. So that's something. So yeah. Yeah. But you know, no one's going to believe me. The people who believe that it actually happened are not going to believe me, even though I actually made the movie, because they're going to say, no, no, no, that actually happened. And she's covering up for it.

She's covering up for something now. So now they're gonna believe it's conspiracy about the boat. Sorry everyone. Sorry America. Yeah, it's um, you know, it's the lame stream media. There was an actual article that was written that was like one theory is that Heather gay fell off the boat. I was like, that's not theory. And people get in target, and it's I've read a lot of comments of people being like, no, I saw it. I saw the clip. I made it with my own little fingers, everyone. So good. Um, all right. So that's actually the best clip you could have put up because that's the only inkling to what happened. I mean, nobody's nose and Heather's not going to tell she's being coy. You can't be coy about abuse or somebody punching you. Okay, you don't get to do that.

If the cops showed up, they would still arrest whoever was there. You know what I mean? Well, you know, maybe this is why, maybe this is the real reason why Gen Shaw was not invited to Prabhokhan and not, you know, originally invited to the reunion, even though then she ultimately was invited. And then they said be yet to talk about the trial and she said I'm according to her. Yeah, according to her. So she

came out with a statement for those of you who don't know what we're talking about. She put a statement on Instagram and she said, yeah, you know, they originally uninvited me but then they re-invited me and I was going to come, but then I decided not to come because they wanted to talk about my trial and all this stuff going on with me and I refused. So it's my choice not to be there. It's kind of like an I broke up with you before you broke up with me, even though you broke up with me

before I broke up with you kind of a statement. And I don't know that I believe that. She could have just pulled an Erica Jane and been like, well, and that is a ball. So that it is under what did she say? What did she keep saying? It's where it is without prejudice on my prejudicial. Judice.

She just kept saying like, it's a lot of food and we are not going to discuss it. It's something like that. It's under legal review. I'm sorry, this is for legal reasons. Supervision of Clarence Thomas at the moment. So, Jillie makes a ruling. Yeah, she kept saying, some like a reasons, some like a reasons without

prejudice. Oh, yeah, yeah. Oh, yeah, I'm quite happy. Yeah, she, like they, Jan, all Jan had to do a show up and say, I can't answer that, I can't answer that. So I do think this is bullshit. But my conspiracy theory, look at this, on the heels of me being like, guys,

I contributed to the fake news on the internet. Now I'm like, my conspiracy theory is that Robert did an investigation and saw that Jan Shaw was the one who perpetrated violence. Because I feel like if you commit a crime, if you defraud thousands of people or if you are somehow party to a crime, that's fine, Bravo's fine.

Like put you on for an hour with Andy Cohen, but if you punch someone else on the cast, you're out, you know, which by the way, I'm not saying that that she should be kept on because she punched me, I'm just showing that like, I think that violence, like inter cast member violence, Bravo is like, not down with whatsoever. So my theory, and this is a theory,

there are no facts to back it. My theory is that Bravo saw that found out that Jen Shaw did the black eye, and that's what they had to get rid of her for all these things, like Bravo Con. Well, I hope we find out because Heather's being really weird, and if Jen Shaw didn't do it, they're really doing her to service because the woman's about to be sentenced.

And they're going to be looking at all of this stuff. And now they've made it look like Jen did it. So and also, you know, who else is making it look like Jen did it? Jen because Jen, I mean, literally, she needs to buy a glove with just, this just made out of a cookie jar, because she really does look like her hand is in the cookie monster's mouth. You know? That would be worse on the eye.

Actually, I personally, I think that Bravo is doing Jenna service because they're establishing on an Asian boy audience that you don't want to fuck with Jen Shaw. I mean, she's going to jail. She's gonna be that she needs to assert dominance in there, okay? So this was, this is like an advertisement, like stay away from her, you know? Oh my God. Don't mess with Jen Shaw.

Yeah, I think we've already got that. So here we are, San Diego Day 3. Hopefully waking up music. It's like, today everyone's waking up. And girl, you know, I'm watching every time somebody gets out of bed, I'm like, pausing and looking to see if there's any bloodstain on their PJs. I was like, Whitney, show me those PJs. But there was nothing there. And then Meredith came on and she pulled off of she pulled off her, you know, mask. I'm not my toddler, Warren, and pulled that off. I'm gonna have to let my toddler warn and pull that off.

I think it's their blood stains on her. No, no blood stains on her. No blood stains anywhere. But it's, but then there's like, but Meredith does cough and bed she goes, and then it goes up like, ah, got her. She coughed finally. I took us three years, but we finally got footage of Meredith coughing. I think some people went on vacation over there because

The sound effects was obviously new person. It was like it was just somebody's like yes I'm gonna assert my sound effects Dominance and they came in here at that side of the export It just went crazy to sold up the side. I'm surprised there wasn't a slide whistle. Maybe there was there was well There wasn't a slide whistle, but there was there was well there wasn't a slide whistle But there was the slide ding you know the ding that's like The sound of someone stepping on a rake Which I feel like there's got to be footage of Whitney doing that somewhere by the way

Oh. So now it's like wacky music and Jen's getting up. Okay, so Jen wakes up There's a scrunched up tissue on the floor next to her bed and lotion on her bedside And if she was a teen boy, she'd be outside picking weeds be like how dare you sin in this? There's also dominoes Like a half-eaten domino's box or something in her room too. Like I said, it was like, what were you having a masturbation sex party in there? We found your loop, your Kleedex and your Domino's. Ron will get outside in the middle of the week.

So then, so Meredith is like slinking out of her room. So we get this new anthem that we've had this year, like the, that goes, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, and then she like walks out their room into the hallway and runs into Jen. And they just, yeah, that's a good one. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, yes.

It's a good one. Oh, and don't forget the sound effect. Oh. Ah. That's the door effect. Oh! Ah! That's the door opens. It's like, thanks for that, guys. I wish we needed that to illustrate the door opening. I wish there was like the explosion sound,

like when you were a kid and you had like, you know, like a sound effects box, or honestly, it's on any megaphone, not to be triggering, but when you press that button and it goes, ooh! Boorah! And you're like, as a kid, you play it like five times in a row.

It's like, guys, there's bombs. Yeah, I got one of those. I got that for Christmas one year. It was a Mr. T keychain and you would just press that back. And then it would be a Mr. T like, what did he used to say? It's like the message would be fool, whatever. Yeah, pitting the fool. Okay, so, I'll say it. You know, by guys later. I have to say, I guess I'm just,

I want to apologize to my parents because, you know, it is Hanukkah right now and I do remember that for Hanukkah, or maybe it's my birthday, it's always the same time, they got me a little Kasiokie board and which had like a hundred different instruments, but of course, instruments 70 through 79 were sound effects.

And I just want to say sorry to my parents because I really went to town on that car horn sound effect, where every single key of the keyboard is just a different sort of variation on a car horn. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, could you imagine? For like six months, me pressing the car horn thing, yeah, fifth grade,

thinking it was the funniest thing I'd ever heard in my life. Basically, genitive reunion. Basically, gendered a reunion. What about me? Eee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee right now. So then Heather Text Gen, I'm having a problem. Could you come to my room? I'm serious. And so she goes over there and we just see that like old jewelry trunk. And there's like costume jewelry on it and a pizza crust. And on the floor there's a sad Marilyn Monroe wig and then his gen comes we hear Bed get off the casio I don't know what that sound effect is but it was on my keyboard So yeah Heather comes I mean so Jen comes in and Heather basically, Jen's like, girl, I got your text,

like what's wrong? So Heather takes that for sunglasses and theirs for black eye, like really big. And Jen's like, can I go to, can I go to, can I go to, like wow, she's stolen Lisa's line at this point. Is there anything she won't touch? Can I touch? So she's like, what happened?

Wait, what happened? And she's like, I don't even know. Does that hurt? Yes, it hurt. Did she's like, what happened? Wait, what happened? And she's like, I don't even know. Does that hurt? Yes, it hurt. Did you put eyes on it? Would you probably put eyes on it? Where the sunglasses? Where the sunglasses?

You're hideous. And she's like, girl, you literally have scratches. And Heather's like, no, it's not scratches. That's just lipstick. It is not lipstick. Those are scratches. And she's like, what the fuck happened? What the fuck happened? the fuck happened wait a second did you get drunk and defraught a whole bunch of people? Oh my god, that was you they're kissing me of your crimes. I can't believe it

So Heather's like well, I don't want to get anybody in trouble John and that's why I need your help John in case anyone wants to talk about what really happened last night. What does that mean? What does that mean? to talk about what really happened last night. What does that mean? What does that mean? It's so strange because I feel like if you're, Heather is smart and she's savvy, and if you're gonna cover for someone, you don't, you already have your excuse

ready when the camera's show up. Like you're already saying like, oh God, I just, I went and I fell over, I was so drunk, I hit the bed. Like you already have it ready, ready to go. Okay, so the fact that she's being so coy and suggesting she remembers, but she still wanna talk about it,

means that she is planning to blow up someone's spot, but she's not doing it just yet. Yeah, she's waiting for the right moment. So she, Jen's like, well, what about a spider, like eggs in your eyeballs? Like what? I texted you to come help me not to say a spider like eggs in my eye. I don't think that story's gonna fly Jen.

Okay, um, um, maybe like, um, something came and it implanted a little bomb in your eyeball and you've got 24 hours and if you go less than 60 miles per hour, your eyeballs gonna explode. Uh, Jen, that's not making me feel better either. What about if she give me 1999 a month you'll have your own website. And then you got so excited about the deal that you banged your head down on the desk and you hurt your eye! I don't know, I feel like we could do better. As then Jen starts going through her excuses, she's like, I don't see what happened.

I mean, Heathery P. Nuts and has a peanut algae and then rub your eye, or maybe she swiped on Tinder and invited someone over and then she got rough. And they're like, maybe she got into bar fight. Like bitch, you went out without me. So Heather's like, okay, so we've got one spider latex for my eyes. Okay, put that on the list.

So then she says, we need a good cover story for this eye because I don't want any of these ladies to get in trouble. Now, what does that mean? Were you all like rough housing and you got hurt? She's so hard to follow this. Well, maybe by saying, I don't want any of these ladies to get in trouble. Maybe she's saying, like, from people on the internet getting mad at them, or maybe she's sort of broadening, broadening out to these ladies that way.

It doesn't, like, maybe she's afraid that there's been a tell already. So she's like, if I say these ladies, it's saying, like, it could have been anyone, not just people that you may have seen come into my room. Yeah, so Jen's like, okay cover story and you don't know what happened. She goes, okay, okay, that's it. I don't know what happened. I just don't know what happened.

And she's like, wait. You really don't know what happened? You're just saying you don't know what happened. She goes, right, right, I don't know what happened. You know, there's some curse right here, right? Well, that's the other thing. We know, there's some cameras right here, right? Well, that's the other thing. We know that there's a camera in there that was getting all of this.

So, you know, they're fucking with us too. So, she's like, okay, well, let's get Meredith now. You know, I want to keep this a big huge secret. So also bring Meredith in here. So they call Meredith and Meredith's like, What? Get out of here. Wow. You guys both look as good as I feel.

Just want to make sure they use them at some point. And Meredith is wearing those under eye patch things, but those are the craziest ones I've ever seen. I mean, we've seen a lot on this show, but hers are like pot holders. Yeah. Or like little trivots. ones I've ever seen. I mean, we've seen a lot on this show, but hers are like pot holders. We're like little trivots. Yeah, they're really big. So Heather's like shit just got real. We need to talk and say, you guys are scaring me. What's wrong, Jen? Is

you're a vagina accounted for our Brooks eyes miles away from it? Okay, Annie, I can take anything else save what was that oh sorry someone ran from the base on my left cheek to the base on my right cheek and they made it there okay so she pulls out Heather pulls off the eyeglasses and the music's like the music's like, and she's like, is it obvious? Emeritus like, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, there never was a conversation. They're weighing about if you'd be getting a black guy today. So Heather's like, I just don't, I don't want to get,

I don't want to, well, when did this happen? Like, we were with you on so far in the morning So then we see finally what happened with that door at 4.15 the morning Jen I'm Heather open the door and then Jen and Meredith and Angie K entered all laughing and they were there for a while And then they all leave laughing Yeah, so how did it happen? Well, that's what we don't know. We're walking to everything You only the stop right now, Jen. Okay, now what's got to do about your finger down Jen? Get your finger out of my face

Okay, well, we don't know how this happened and just like I'll be right back. Meredith do not leave her. She needs a chef alone. So she leaves and Meredith is asking her to have scratches on your back. I mean, what happened? Like, maybe you could have fallen, but the scratches on your arm don't say fall, you know? They say Whitney screaming, hilling over and over. And there's like, I don't wanna talk about it.

I don't wanna talk about it. I'm like, well, you know what happened. I'm like, I'm like, oh my God, it seems like she was physically battered. Sort of like what Bruxy did to his brand new Thomas the Train toy. Oh, so what Abrux action does to little rolls of pretend only physically banners them and physically fries them and then physically eats them and then physically calls himself a vegan after.

And it's like the time I made Plato for Bruxley and he just mashed it and mashed it in his hands on his little high chair and I said I'm going to take that away from you unless you stop physically battering the Play-Doh. So Heather's like, I don't know what happened. I said, you know, now I don't recall. And so she's just going to play Koi. So then he's like goes, I don't recall and So she's just gonna play coy so then He said goes Heather's like who like thank God I put a lot of effort into my turns out

I don't remember things storyline this season because it's really working out well for me right at this moment Yeah, so then Lisa goes to Whitney's room and they're in their PJs and she's like good morning How's it going? How's it going with you? How do you feel about last night? Are you feeling okay? Are you feeling okay about last night? She's like, not really. No. The other thing I'm frustrated with is Meredith. You know how I used to be like Lisa is a puppet master and she pushes strings. Well now I see that Meredith is pushing strings. She's really in this how to like put something up that like someone will take that thing and then they're like, oh my string. Yeah, she's even renaming. She started calling me Mary, Mary O'Neatt. I don't even understand that. But this classic Whitney back to

the old thing of being manipulated and then getting angry that someone was able to so easily and obviously manipulate her. This is what he's favorite thing to do. But Whitney, let me say we're excited because you tell her one thing. Meredith told her, well I heard that Lisa's doing favors for a Vita to keep. Yeah, I heard that Lisa was fucking everybody for just for jazz tickets. and she's had six children from the jizz for jazz guy What wait what you made me say that You got to recognize the holes before you fall in them, okay? So

Then we see the clip of Meredith being a mastermind. And she goes, Whitney, you have told Heather, who is told Jan, oh, Jan told Lisa, Lisa told, snap, and Lisa told, Saf told, Jan, that sounds like the same to me. But Jan, I just had the weirdest moment, Ronnie.

I just had this number where I was just like listening to you because I had this moment where I got really excited, like, oh my god, oh my god, like, like, like Christmas break is coming. I had this weird school moment and then I was listening to you and I'm like, I cannot believe this is what we're doing right now. Like this is- I hate the head that's- There was something about like the excitement about going on break and then the excitement about hearing the silly fight. I just like had this weird like sensation in my chest. It is loony tunes. I don't get it. and then the excitement about hearing the silly fight, I just like had this weird sensation in my chest.

It is loony tunes, I don't get it. It's crazy. I was reading a comment that was like, oh God, what your crap is so stupid. My God, they're so loud and those voices it's just cringes, it's too irritating. It's the most annoying thing I've ever listened to in my life. I was like, well, they've actually listened.

I mean, to have to give them credit because that's pretty much our show. I'm like, well, at least this isn't a fake review, you know? I mean, like, yes. Thanks for stopping by. Oh, I'm sorry. Did you think I was Terry Gross? My apologies.

I was cracking up. Thank you. So, um, Whitney is We're like this in real life too if it helps. It helps. Yeah, I'm gonna be home goods Christ I'm going fast. There's coming again. Hey Judy Woodruff. Yeah, one of your listeners was to us by accident. Okay, could you send her your way? Thanks So we cut back and Whitney's like yeah, and then where she can say that I didn't say it Well, you know why because she didn't say it she alludes and then she gets and then she gets the other person to say it That's like saying you're behind traffic and like the person in front of you

Makes a left turn on green and then by the time you get to the light it turns red But you make the left turn also when you crash into a car and you're like, but they did it. It's like Pearl Pay attention to the signals. There are a little light bulb goes off and Whitney's heard. And she goes, I think Meredith is seeking revenge and wants to take Lisa down without looking like someone who is seeking revenge.

Congratulations, Whitney. You solved it. Congratulations Whitney, you solved it. It only took you 12 episodes. I just want to see the infinity signs and like crashing waves in the ocean. And then revenge, R-I-V-I-M-G-E, star in Madeline's dough. I just want to see a Ron Howard movie where Whitney is just like writing just about three digits on to a glass wall and just called a mind It's not a beautiful mind just a mind

It's not math. It's just random numbers and then like a small letter a you're a quater minute Is that algebra that she's doing Okay, you're a quid a minute. Is that algebra that she's doing? Who's L? So Lisa's like, What was your plan to get all of you to like, it was to get all of us to start saying stuff about you. And then Lou,

Lisa, Lisa of course has known this, but she has to play along. So she goes, honestly. This is like wow Wow, I can't believe it took you so long to figure out what we've all been talking about for 12 weeks Wow Marath holds a grudge and when Meredith is determined to take you out There's like nothing that's gonna stop her until I'm in the fetal position wanting to take myself out

She won't be happy. I'm like, okay. Okay, let's, let's calm down. She's not the mafia. Okay. She's not, she's not putting you in a well and making you put lotion on your skin. No kidding. I know. And also we had the gen whole like, he made me want to kill my you. Let's kill myself because of you last week. Like, can we drop that on this show? Okay, let's just drop that It put the fresh wolf on its skin So then we go to the living room everybody's getting ready to go off for the day and Whitney's saying are you ready? for a shot and

At least it's like you have shots. Let's do a shot. Oh my god So then Dan and Cubs are basically all just gathering around. Like I didn't walk a good wrong. Everything seems like a perfectly fine thing, right? Yeah, and Dan is like, are you guys ready for a day? We're going roller-playing. Yeah, and then Heather's like, I am dreading this.

I don't want anyone to see my eye. I don't want to answer any questions. So I don't want to have to answer any questions. So she goes in wearing sunglasses, so everything's fine because half of them are wearing sunglasses. And then everyone's showing up and no one realizes that there's something afoot. And then Lisa's like, guys, I had a near death experience last night. Jen came in topless and hugged me. At first I was suffocated and I was like, you're choking me out, guys, isn isn't that hilarious and I was like didn't murder send you to smother me to death because that's what you want retaliation. So then Whitney's like wait tell me about last night

because I heard a lot of communion but nobody came to my room last night with their titties out. I like that you heard a lot of commune I I think she said commotion, but I like the idea that you heard a lot of communion like she actually heard aliens on the rooftop. Wait a second. I read that book communion. There's aliens up there.

See a lot of questions sharing bread downstairs. Or that. And Heather's like, well, since I don't want to talk about this, last night got a little rough guys and Whitney's like, what do you mean?

So I think we know what happened. We just don't wanna talk about it. Wait a minute, what happened? What happened? What happened last night? What happened, suffocated? And then Heather takes off her glasses. And they're like, oh my God.

Lisa's like, what the fuck happened? Did Meredith just punch you thinking that you were me? Was it my life and reputation that Meredith thought she saw? And she was just trying to punch them, give them a black eye. Was that John Barlow's reputation that she tried to attack? So then the producer was like, well, what do you think happened, Heather?

And she goes, I mean, what does it look like? I mean, what does it look like? I mean, what does it look like? Okay, I'm just going to shut down and I don't want to talk about it. And Lisa goes, what? Ha, ha, ha. She goes, I don't know. You're kidding, Heather, you are kidding.

And Lisa says to us, did you just get some short term memory lost with that black eye? Because you just said like two different things. I'd like two seconds. And then we see on the screen, 15 seconds earlier. I think we all know what happened. We just don't want to talk about it. Yeah and then there's like, she's like, you know, I don't think it's too noticeable. I'm like, it's pretty bad, you know, and so at least you're like, Heather, are you insane? You look like somebody cold-coch you. You know, when they sing that song,

give me a break, give me a break, break me off a piece of that kick-cat bar They don't mean break your eye. Oh my god. Yeah, you look like you're then being gear way up along staircase to ring a taco BOW okay, I mean it looks like somebody clocked you she as well maybe somebody did and they just don't want to talk about it Wait did somebody hit you? No, she just did some really fantastic eye makeup job today. I don't want to talk about it. I don't want to make this whole trip about my black eye. I want to make this trip about people wondering about my black eye.

Okay. Wait, so just to listen to Heather and then to see Heather laugh it off. But then to see Heather allude, I hope you like that word, because I'm gonna use it a lot today. Allude to someone hitting her, she allude it. It's making me a lute physical sickness. Like I feel like I'm gonna throw up alludes.

And then when he takes a pillow and throws it in the air, Look, I threw you up. So then Heather is like, you know what? What's the one way I like to deal with things, guys? By not talking about it, let's just sweep it under the rug and deflect and they're all like, okay, she gets the Heather gay way. And they're like, okay, I guess.

And then Whitney's like, it's not funny, Heather. If someone did this to her, long pause, long pause. In this group, longer pause. If someone did this to her, that's a problem. Who I didn't think I'd get you that sentence. Mm-hmm. And Heather's like, well, we're women of grit and we work through the pain.

So half the ladies go go carting, so we go go carting. And of course Lisa's like, oh my gosh, I think that I need one of these in my garage. Yeah, I was like really sad that they did not, you know, slide in a flashback of Lisa Barlow driving NASCAR in Vegas, you know. So Angie K is like, the group activities have not been going very well so far.

So I thought that one-on-one ride on one of the go-karts would be fun, just experiencing the city together and San Diego. I was hoping that I would have a very forced metaphor for the rest of this sentence, maybe about birds and flocking, but I think I'll wait later in the episode for that, because Seagulls.

So they pair up to go in the cars two by two, and Heather's like, I chose Lisa Barlow to pair up with, because all she does is really talk about herself. I'm not gonna have to say one word, and then it cuts to 20 minutes later. Yeah, so I got some friendly chaseay by Dross, and Trump's like, how much was that? And I was like, oh my God, that looks like any diet dogs. That crazy thing.

That crazy thing, that's not it. Yeah, if I were to ride with someone else that just be grilling me, it'd be like in the interrogation room I'm trapped in. So Lisa won't even remember that I'm there, which is honestly a very good read on Lisa. It really is and then it just starts cutting to all the ladies talking about it and Jim's like well when I first went in there I thought someone punched her and I was like what about me and then Angie's like I thought it was a fall. I thought it was a fall that she went through and Jen's like did she fall and Angie's like yeah, well,

you know, her wounds were in two different areas. So that was weird. And then it cuts to Lisa going, and oh my God, I have so many chefs. They're all over the floor. And she's like, geez, why are there chefs? I love the floor. I'm like, you know what? Don't harsh my chalupa, dude. You know what I'm saying? Yeah, just completely like not even to concern, not like you can tell me, you know. So then Jen's like, just completely, not even to concern, not like you can tell me. So then Jen's like, I mean, she doesn't even know what happened, but it's like, you would have to know, right?

Like you would have to know, it was most likely anyone but me. And so then Angie's, and Angie's like, the stranger part is that she doesn't even remember at all. And Mert is like, well, I think she has a clone. Doesn't want to talk about it. I'm like, what give you that sense, Mert, at the fact that she said, I know who it is, but I don't want to talk about it. Speaking of people with the clue, let's cut to someone without a clue.

Ever Whitney going, hey, wait, I don't know how to reverse this thing. Where's the cloud with the fishing pole? Whitney is just stuck in the road. I don't know how to reverse this thing. Where's the cloud with the fishing pole? Help. Whitney is just stuck in the road. A guy actually has to get out of his car in traffic and physically turn her car around. There is a Cooper trooper, I'm front of her that has holding a design that says reverse.

I'm like, we knew, we knew. I love the production really does not give a fuck about these people. They're like, well, Whitney is just completely in a stop on a busy road. Surely nothing bad can happen. Let's just see. Let's just wait. In a tiny car that people might not notice. But she's like perpendicular across the lane. How did she even wind up like that by the way? Forget that she doesn't have a reverse. Why was she making a right turn into the curb? What it doing that? so Now Meredith has booked a winery and Dan is like no, we're gonna go rollerblading

So So then Danut Whitney and Lisa go to the beach to do roller skating and Whitney's like, hey, those are roller skates, not roller blades. And she goes, we are screwed. I'm like, the other presentation about roller blades coming up, why are you screwed? Just, I have been rollerblading since I was a little kid.

It's my jam. I've been releblating so long I releblated since the time when saying it's my jam was cool. But relegating is so much different than releblating. It's not the same thing. So for me, it's going to be so much harder to shoot this very small scene where I get ice cream on wheels. So we got the winery and they sit down at the table and it's like clown music because Roberto brings some chips and charcootery and I was like oh my god can we get a normal meal that requires few tensiles I'm sick of rolled up cheese and tidy crackers and clusters of

grapes okay I want a fork and I want a knife. I feel you. I feel you. Like, please, give her a slice of keys or something. Finally, somebody said it. Every scene. They're every episode this season. They've had Sharkrootry. Well, especially because last night their dinner was just Sharkrootry. Like, I think that's really what she's reacting to that like dinner last night was a table length Sharkrootry board. And that's just not cool. I'm sorry So Lisa's like oh through the sixth and seventh grade I was in the roller rink every Friday night and I could do tricks and all those stuff fun things on roller skates Yeah, so uh, you know, it was fun except for the time I got tied up to a pole in the middle of the rink and it you exit me But even then I got to know a lot of people.

Hi, hi, Julie. I'm the random. Oh, that egg almost got me. So Whitney's like, how was your car ride? And Dana says it was fun. And Lisa's like like yeah, what do you guys talk about man Heather? We're talking about our cats Doesn't even remember what she's talking about So he's like did you talk about her black guy? And he's goes no did she have a black guy? What do you think it happened? She's standing up back. I good for her. Oh my god Did she know Fergie? a back eye. Good for her. Oh my God. Does she know Fergie? So Whitney's like, she'd, wait a minute, she did it to herself or someone did it to her. It's like, oh my God, we need to just send with me rows a gigantic, magnifying glass to just hold up and look through every time she's saying one of these dippy lines.

I've got it. Either she bruised herself or she got a bruise from someplace. Huge eye. Huge eye with me. Just get her one of those brown caps that has the flaps that go down over your ear. The poirot. The poir plural. Yeah. The plural special. What was the name of that show with Jill Scott? Whitney could reboot it, you know.

Oh my god, I love that. I said number one. And that is so titled by Whitney. If you need anything figured out, call the number one ladies detective agency Thank you Was definitely named on the fly It is definitely Whitney Roads vital So then if Whitney gives us her hypothesis she's like well

I think if someone hit her, it was Jen. We all know how toxic their friendship is and at this stage of like how intoxicated they were, what if like Heather ticked off Jen and then Jen hit her. But why is Heather covering this up? Does she think it will be bad for her trial? I don't know. I feel like you answered your question there, Whitney. I feel like it's all right there. Unless the only other theory I could come up with is that Angie Harrington was just so mad

about not being invited. She actually drove her way to San Diego with a diaper on like that astronaut and went and beat up Heather and left the middle of the night. I'd like to think it was just Marilyn Monroe. We go. You think I haven't taken enough shit. Have you seen the Netflix movie about me? It was trash. How dare you? I think it was a shit out of every Matt Marilyn Monroe. I

think it was the waiter from the Sharkwood Replace. He's like, I told you to order the Narka Rita. He just he burst through the door a little shoes with skates on the heels. I was like, I told you about the Margarita. commercials here comes one right now. Okay, so back with the other ladies, Meredith's like, listen, I don't know what happened, but whatever happened is not okay. And then there's like, what? What do you mean? Oh, whatever, broke my eye or gave me these scratches. This hole in my back, tried to decapitate me with a giant ax so that I don't remember. Yes, yes, it's really concerning.

Okay, like I thought I'd seen concerning the way that Seth reacted to my toenail going up his taint, but this, this is no level. Okay, it's not okay at any level and I don't know what happened, but I know it's not okay. And Jen is giving some really guilty looking looks right about it. Yeah. They keep cutting to Jen close-ups and they're like, our eyes are really wide. And Heather's like, just respect, I don't want to talk about it now. I'll talk about it later, but not now. Well, we are worried about it,

but we will respect your spings just as long as you're safe. I'm sorry, I can't stop putting certain words in all caps. Listen, we are concerned, our frustrations are earned, and we were scared. Oh God, I thought with enough time passing, I could start learning how to do three rhymes in a row. So the producer asks Heather again. They're like, so you're not gonna tell us what happened.

She goes, I can't because that's a game of it, you know? I'm not gonna say what happened until somebody else says it, you know? Like I'm not gonna spew my theories until everyone spews, okay, so are they theories? Or do you know what happened? You can't do this, this is not cool. And she says this is like a game of Texas hold-up

and nobody shows their cards. All right Heather, you got 30 more seconds before bringing Cura Sedgwick, okay? Cause we don't wanna have to take it to that level, but we were willing to Now you listen here. Give me a cupcake with you. I just can't stop eating look at me Just a food addict now you listen here. You murderer Those are my favorite Kira's Cedric character. There's a Kira's Cedric playing a lady cop who's just obsessed with food

She's as big as a pinky, okay? cop who's just obsessed with food. She's as big as a pinky. Okay. Real, are you fucking kidding me with this? Don't try and pull this shit on me TNT. I'm still mad about the closer. Oh, and then when they were like, Hey, guess what? In season two, we're not going to have wacky Kira. She's going to be serious now. Fuck off. First, you made her fake fat and you made her fake wacky. You can't do this to me. Oh, I didn't realize there was a tonal shift and I thought the show was serious all along. Well, it was serious, but she was like kind of wacky because she's always like, nah, you've been to me, look at this crab scene,

blood spattered all over. Could you get me some licorice doll? Okay. And then her thing was disarming people by being just a sweet seven girl and then she turned like real serious, but in the end she was just always real serious. Hmm. She just was serious, serious all the time. Well, we need her to get to the bottom of this,

this mystery, which is like pretty obvious. I mean, you know, when you, when you've spent like two or three episodes declaring that you're right or die for Gen Shaw and that you'll do anything for Gen Shaw and now you're covering something up. It's pretty obvious where this is going. So Heather goes, when I woke up, I called you and you and you. And normally I would call Whitney immediately, but then after the dinner last night, when I found out that I was on a friendship break. And by the way, I just want to say this was Heather brilliantly pivoting away from her eye and making this about Whitney.

And so when she said that when Heather goes, I found out I was on a friendship break. It cuts to Meredith and Meredith cocks her head up like, like she was like the T 1000 after the 2000 took a giant like shot to the head and it kind of like put its head back together and was like, I'm still coming after you. She's like Whitney and I've been incahutes. I mean, we've always been best friends. And then I tell Whitney everything, like I would vent to Whitney. And I would say all this stuff that doesn't even matter.

And so now she wants to start fresh with Lisa. Well, don't pull me into it because like don't go to telling her everything that I said as friends. Because and pull me into it because it don't go telling her everything that I said as friends because and pull me into it because it just makes me not trust Wendy. I mean, trust Whitney. He's sorry it's a different show. She's like, I've never trusted Whitney.

I don't even believe she really had a kidney stone. Whitney has too much honor, please. Yeah, Whitney is, Whitney is just so busy all the time. So she's like, but okay, also just have to point out here. It makes it sound like Heather is also copying to hearing the rumor of just for jazz, right? Because what else has Whitney said that Heather was talking about at petty times? It doesn't matter. So when she's saying, Whitney and I have been in Cajute since day one, I say all the petty

stuff to her that I don't, you know, that doesn't even matter. And now she wants to buddy, buddy with Lisa and pull me into it and say everything we said as friends. So sounds like. So here's how I, here's how I'm actually interpreting that. And this is not because I'm like not a Heather Apologist, but I'm, um, what's the opposite of an Apologist for the way Whitney interprets reality? Because Whitney has a strange way of interpreting

reality. And I feel like Whitney and Heather were key keying and they were just joking and they're probably laughing like yeah, Lisa probably gave below jobs for those seats, ho ho ho ho ho, joking like that. And then next thing you know what he's like, there's a rumor that you gave below jobs for those seats, Heather heard it too. And it's like, you know how there's like, no, we're probably just joking about it. And you just put it all out there. Like it was an actual rumor. Yeah. So Heather's like, but I'm going to give her some craze because she's going through a lot of stuff. Like, there's a lot of information I didn't even know. I mean, Justin losing his job dot, dot, dot, and just like, yeah, that's where they're

bonding because Whitney has her stuff with Justin and these other problems too There's a SEC filing It's like oh so Jen is implying that that Whitney and Lisa are getting close because they're they're poor now They have debt they have debt so therefore they're bonding so yeah She brings up this SEC thing and she's like, yeah, I mean, like there's a crowdfunding, we're like Lisa saying that she's like the richest bitch out of all of us, but then she's also trying to crowdfund for like $25,000.

Like what about me? Where's my $25,000? I have lawyers. So Meredith is like, wow. The whole thing is very strange to me because I don't understand why you reach out for $25,000 in crowdfunding. And in it, you have to disclose everything and all your debts.

And they have to have a loan from, apparently they have a loan from Fargo. And well, we label a label market value. Yeah, so, wait, Genshop core shaming on the very week that the evidence came out of all of her stuff being fakes, those core documents, of like 90% of the stuff that Gen shows off on the show are fakes, is funny. But also, you know, when you've been ripping off old, yes, this is what it looks like when people are actually trying to fund their business. Like, what the hell, you know, what is she supposed to have all this money in her purse? Yeah. So, uh, well, of course they're going to, of course she's going to shame that because

it puts attention off of her. So then Dan, meanwhile over at ice cream, they've all like let their ice creams melt. We see see a close up of three melted ice cream, ice cream at the cones fully intact, so none of them even ate their cones. Like carbs, ew. So it's also bullying, you know? Like whoever saw three real housewives coming and gave them a giant waffle cone with five scoops in them,

can go jump off the, you know, they can jump off the boat. Okay, that's just bullying. That's housewives bullying. Eating. Yeah. So Dan is like, so we went to Meredith's home, like me and GK and Heather and we were like all talking to Meredith and she came, she got some information from somebody about like your business, Lisa. She was like sharing with us that like Vita was crowdfunding something with like the SEC and the global recession being your fault. I don't know, do you hear about that? And then we see a clip of Meredith

last night being like, and by the way, there is a whole anti-thing filing that's floating around that was sent to me and it's a dog and it's a public dog, man. That shows that they're not making money and everything else that she's saying about everyone else. Well, hold on, let me just pull my head all the way back to be resting right on my spine while my chin moves downwards and makes a slope. Do you understand what I'm saying? What I'm trying is, and if you look very closely at photos of that barge that clunged up the Suez Canal for four months, you see the person driving, it was Lisa Barlow, and that

was just sent to me. So then we cut trying to harm her, that would be one thing, but this is intentionally trying to harm her. You know what? CC filings are public filings, but it's not on Vita, okay? It's not a brand that we own,

that has one outlet that we sell, Nosh and Watt, okay? Meredith is upset that I had a hot mic moment, and she's retaliating, okay? And she's trying to disbarge my name and my business and my marriage and my family. And sorry, my company isn't failing. It's actually thropping. Even the Northern North ever seen it in the store.

My payouts are on Instagram and she'd have to sell a lot of jewelry to make one of my P.O.s. And she said my children are off limits, family is off limits. Piers are off limits. Well guess what? You just came after all my stuff. So maybe nothing's up. Lemon's army. Boy. Maybe nothing's up. Lemon's army. This is how Meredith works. She put something out there. So you think she's

trying to make Lisa look bad? Wait, I was gonna say that well, land the plane dummy and it's like Jesus Christ. I didn't even know you were your postmaster general. The POs post offices, right? You've got post, put them on the Instagram, show people who you really are. I don't know why everybody's getting so mad. I don't know why you're getting so upset that everyone's calling you sexy. F-E-C, Whitney. Yeah, that's what I said. What is S-E-C? Who is S-E? What is she seeing?

So Lisa's like, yeah, she told me I'm mental as she's, oh my god! No, I don't potpest bitch. You do Yeah, I Wait, I just realized something Lisa's mad Because Meredith's retelling at her at Something because Lisa said something last hit all makes sense now. I love that Lisa is having a fit and screaming her head off on the beach with a pink bike

helmet on. Yeah. So then we go tonight time and the van ladies are coming back to the house in the van and talking about what a fabulous time they had. And then Angie is like, wait, I wouldn't understand boy about this SEC filing. I don't know what this crowdfunding thing is. What is that?

And it's like, it's a record by the government of when you use money for business. Yeah, it's a securities exchange commission and they monitor all public training. So when you're doing crowdfunding, people need to know where that money is going. And do you have to let them know if your shoes have been thrown off of the boat? Is that a filing as well? No, no, you don't. Because I would like to crowdfund to get those back. Well, then you might have to. Yes. I would like to file something with

the C exchange commission, please. And Heather's like, okay, and who does crowdfunding, Meredith? So could you guys have a little song like an after school special? Security's exchange commission. My monitor, a public trading. The wheels on the STC go round and round round and round Sexy get out of my after school special Whitney. It's not an appropriate outfit. I'm bringing SCC back I'm bringing SC back And all you filings are so out of whack.

Eh? Is this marrida from the back going, eh? I don't, mate. I don't understand. Well, let me just tell you, the poor people leave it. And it's a pain in the ass is the bottom line. I can't imagine wanting to crowdfund at this stage in my life unless I don't have any other joy

So does that mean I'm going to get in trouble with the SEC for the time? I went to a Papa Roach concert. No crowd fun not crowds surf. You're okay with me. I Love having crowd fun. Oh God, you're not even in the scene with me. Please get off the bus What if I have child fun? Cause it's delicious. All right, Whitney, first of all, go back to your ice cream scene. So, and she's like, okay, but are you closer? That's that you could ask her about this stuff. Emeritus goes, I don't care. I don't even care about this stuff, Meredith goes, I don't care. I don't even care about this stuff,

which is why I brought it up to the group last night and why I'm shaking my head and having a fit about it right now on this party bus. You know what, I am so uncomfortable with Lisa not being here and then talking about her business like she's doing something shady. I mean, there's no way Lisa is broke. She would not be wearing the brands she's wearing, driving the car that she's driving,

and living in the home that she is living in today. And if that's what being broke looks like, I will take it. Hi, welcome to Bravo. Yeah, lady. This is where your friends are, because you're not paying attention to the way the game has played.

Yeah. Yeah, lady this is where your friends up because you're not paying attention to the way the game is played Yeah, my god, so The gen pulls out her phone. Thank you. This here. It is. I found it. I found it. And so it's these papers, you know, I guess it's the report from the SEC or whatever and Angie Meredith is like well, I don't like to count other people's money, but if you want to sit here and say, I don't know in a home, am I husband, can't keep a job? Oh, I'm flakin' home! Ha ha ha ha! Wait a second, it sounds like she's retaliating.

Waitin' me, I told you, go back to your role or bleeding. So now we're back at the house, and everyone's gonna get dressed for their big, this big Greek goddess dinner and everything. And Angie goes to check in on Lisa. And Lisa's like, hi Angie, you look so good. I'm 2022, Alan of Troy.

Okay, well, not a goddess, but that's fine. Anyway, more of your work. I love they put up a side by side of her outfit, which is basically like a crop top version of the something that like the chick from frozen would wear and then You know Helen of choice in this long flowy goddess dress thing so good. I know By the way, I have to say I love Helen of choice the keyla. It's so it's so tasty So you should all try it. So it's still called to be that. It's called my hell in Detroit. Hi, Paris. Hi, Homer and Achilles.

That's all I can remember from that. So Lisa is saying how she had like a really good time with Whitney and Dana. She's like, yeah, like, we went, God, we went roller skating and stopped and got ice cream and then put the ice cream on the sidewalk and let it melt, which was really fun. And then Whitney and Dana were telling me that they went to murder's house and there was a conversation about my best nots.

Oh my God. And then Angie's like, well, the white tasting, they brought up like a SCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCC I don't know what a CCC peniston something like that CCC and Lisa's like, I say say Just yeah, thank you. So bear this do about it and brought it up and then Heather was talking about it And then Jen started digging up stuff on her phone, at least it goes, wow. And she's like, yeah, you know, so Meredith and Heather have both experienced Jen's toxic behavior, but now they're both supporting it. And we know Meredith loves her feathers,

birds of a feather flock together, but they're not pretty birds, the seagulls, and everyone hates seagulls because they shit on people. Thanks for seeing that all the way through the end. Aaron actually really gave it a roll for that one. And he's like, well, Meredith said something about, like, John Litt doesn't like to work or he doesn't work. We all know that's not true. I could text him right now when he would pick it up pick up a chair I put it on top of the set just because he doesn't that's really supposed to know

Did you just get pooped on by a seagull because I definitely just got pooped on by a seagull metaphorically speaking You know that I ever tell you I was gonna compare them to seagulls. Yes Yes, and the Lisa's just going off now, you know, she's like, the fact that they're talking about John as the Scott's back. That is the Scott's like her jaw is like under her chest and her head is in the back of you know, like just completely unhinged. She's talking so widely. Her head is complete.

Little pez candy starts spitting out of Angie's face. She's, yeah, she's like, you know what? Catch your team together. Make sure you've got Heather, make sure you got Jen, make sure all your troops are ready to attack Lisa, because you can't do it on your own. And if you attack me, make sure you come with facts and not made up bullshit, okay? I know what I have, I know what we've built.

And the fact that you're talking about John Barlow is disgusting, like honestly, it's disgusting. It's disgusting. Can I touch? So then it's dinner time so everybody's gathered outside and their greet goddess dresses, which not a one of them was, by the way. And so Whitney's like, wow Heather, how do you have a custom evil eye? I pat. Can we do that again? I felt like the words were too far apart. And I want to make the words closer together. Heather, how do you have a custom eye evil? Okay, Whitney, I'm going to see you here. Jen Shaw had a custom evil eye patch. Well, just a regular evil eye patch in her,

I mean, an eye patch in her luggage. And then you made a cut. Oh my God, from the top, from the top. Heather, this time with feeling. Okay, Jen had an eye patch in her luggage, and then Jen and Meredith be dazzled at for me with an evil eye. I'm like, and they're like, oh, that's classic, Jen, of course she has an eye patch. I'm like and they're like, oh, that's classic Jen. Of course she has an eye patch

I'm like, hmm does she now things are getting really weird. That's for court Because you know Jen you know Jen walks into court like well the reason I answer those questions was because I wouldn't give me Sadie and solution when they were questioning me and then my eyes were really burning and now look at me. I have an eye bad Now look at me, I have an eye patch. Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah statement and she confessed and then she tried to like have her it was something like she confessed and then they She tried to have her confession stricken because they wouldn't give her saline solution during questioning and her eye hurt rights I'll never forget that so anyway at least it's like who cares and I've had to arrived like she's so mad She's mad at everybody for every reason right now. Yeah, so then, so now Dana comes out

and Heather's like, what got us are you? And she was, I'm the one with all the kids. And Heather's like, Dana, that's crazy. Here not just have kids. She's marriage is Zeus, who cheated on her. And Lisa coming in as Helen of Troy. I mean, what's it, Helen of Troy? Who is it for New Spears and Justin Timberlake

at the Grammys? What's going on? I would like to add something to that. Does anyone wearing feathers? Because that reminds me of Seagulls. Do you know what Seagulls do? They pick up trash and they die when they have plastic things around their neck.

No, I got this Angie, okay? We're staying in Greek gods. Scree-gots, comic hour. Jen comes in with giant hair, you know, because she's Jen. And when he's like, who are you, Jen? And she says, I'm goddess Athena. Yeah, goddess of war. She brought a shield and a pole.

It's a sword with me. It's a sword with me. I have a sword in my basement. It says see. So then Lisa is like Lisa is so angry. She doesn't even want to be there. She's only doing it because Angie is throwing the dinner. It means a lot to her.

So then Meredith comes to the table and she's like, Hi everyone. And Lisa is like, Hi! I think it's a spark. Yeah, I have a hard time with that. And, Jenga's with what Lisa? With everything.

What's going on? You're like so grumpy. Like, he came in and like the goddess of grump. So, you know, I'm not, I'm not, nothing is wrong. I was like, you're lying, Lisa. Are you lying, Lisa? Lisa, someone passed me the saline solution, so she can't lie. She can't get away with lying.

So, please. So obsessed with me. I feel like Mariah Carey. Oh my God, I didn't vent Christmas. So that works out. Oh my God, that fucking song. I need that song to just die. We're just at that time of year. When it's like the rest of the year love Moriah Carey this time of the year I'm just done just just ended already So then sorry sorry Katie and Walter love you guys, but you know even their sick of this damn song They've got to be sick of that song everywhere you go in you walk into a funeral. They'll be like Shut up. Oh, I want for Christmas. It's for free to shut the fuck up. I can't take anymore!

I can't take it! Ronnie, why are you so obsessed with me, boy? I wanna know! I'm being incest-y-backed. Why are you so obsessed with me? You got me feeling emotions. Whoa, whoa, higher than I've ever been before. So Heather is loving this email.

She's like, who pissed in Lisa Barlow's Diet Coke? She's not happy and everyone knows I love an unhinged Lisa Barlow. So here's hoping I can see it all from my one eye, which I do not want to talk about. Yeah. So then Angie gets carried in by some random, you know, like, I guess like the Uber Eats guys, she's like, Hey, can you guys stay for one moment and just carry me into the backyard? Thank you very much. So she's like, ladies, me Zeus and Hercules, welcome to the gathering of goddesses. And they're like, oh, wow. Well,

this makes me lose faith that these are our goddesses. I don't know. So Angie's like, she's like, okay, gods, you made the part. Everyone, I'm very passionate about being Greek. Both my parents are Greek, and I want to share my culture with these ladies by having them dress up like Greek goddesses. And that's the end of my cultural awareness program. Thank you. So she gives them all the little evil eye necklaces and stuff and Lisa's like, oh my God, could anything be more a prop rat?

Give me all the evil eyes. Anything to wear off these ever better ass. So then Lisa goes, and Jay, it is amazing that your parents are true. Emigrants as opposed to what false immigrants would be talking about all those fake immigrant parents out there. You know what? Your parents, they really make it happen. If you believe in yourself and you come to America, you can make it happen. Make it happen. Wow, you know what is so nice to hear that your parents came over literally holding a Y-Raw. Y-Raw, my ride.

So, they start talking about their days and Dennis, like roller skating was so fun. We had ice cream while we were skating. And Lisa is like, yeah, we got ice cream. I've been chatted a lot. I've been on a ferry and five minutes conversation. And boom, the sound effect. The sound effect guy has showed up. So Whitney is like, wait, I have a question.

Who alluded about a SEC file filing? Who brought that up? Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee So he says like, why is everybody so wordy-fiving? I see a file and I'm like, nobody is worried. I'm out. And this goes, well, did you talk about me and my businesses? Well, I haven't really talked about it other than and passing just casually just sort of tumbled out of my mouth when I said, hey, everyone come over to my place so we can talk about things as businesses. Then we talked about them for three hours, just in passing. Did you have a conversation with that about that?

And she told us about the conversation she had with that about that. And where it is like, well, that was the same conversation where I was casually missing. Oh yeah, well, I'm gonna be very clear. And then it goes, whoa, whoa, we just went from zero to sexy as a table And I heard you were just a one talking about it in the car too

Listen, I have an SEC filing that has multiple grants and that is not Vita tequila. Okay. That is tequila. So you don't okay? And if you guys have any questions, I'm happy to answer for you I think it's funny that you guys all want a chitchat about me, okay? Questions I'm happy to answer for you. I think it's funny that you guys all want a chitchat about me, okay? Please You want a chat about everyone else? Please I'm like are you listening to last culture? He says what's happening here? It's so funny hot me

And Lisa's like mad at I had one bad moment in a host shop. I went with not one moment. Do not go there. I've got the cap song for every other word. Oh, do not go there. What are you going to do? Talk about gossip about me. Okay, and say my husband doesn't have a job.

Don't talk to me. I love her about Mappy. Try trying out that doubt M me. I love her. Don't, Mappy. Try trying out that. Don't, Mappy. I said. Oh, while your husband has a job, he works with you and you have a company and no one has doubted that. Oh, it was not true.

And she's not supposed to. It's true. But it's not. And it's like, bring you asking in your G. So there's like, did she come home from our bus ride and download it all to you and now that's why you're so pissed, is that what happened and so now Heather's mad at Angie Gossip and she's like, oh, thanks very much, Angie K. You think you're just gonna endure yourself to Lisa? You think Lisa just wants to hear about her $25,000 SEC filing. Pretend

you didn't hear. Pretend she is rich. That's what she likes. And she tells her, she's like, it's important to host a dinner where you stir up trouble before it starts. And GK, even though we all said that stuff in front of you, so you would do exactly that. You know, it's like, this is a fuck you, but also with thank you. You know, so Angie's like, but you guys were talking about her and that makes me very uncomfortable because like we were, we were at the car and then they were talking to you and like you were talking about her and that's wrong. Seagulls. What's the point to show Flos and who I am?

No, the point is if you want to question my husband's business, I didn't question your husband's stuff, I said something, I just said something ridiculous in a rant. Okay, you gotta get over that. I'm just like, well, and you, in danger, the livelihood of his four thousand and boy. Okay, okay. It's reckless. Okay, okay, we can calm down. You almost put four thousand people into the poor house

links. I'm good. You so I'm just looking at this. I'm looking at Seth Marks linked in let's see here. Oh my god. We have a friend in comment. So there's that. So he's been at his recent job, Chief Merchandising Officer's Channel Control Merchants, one year and 10

months before that one year and three months, CEO of IE Retail Ventures. And before that two years, four months, so he changed his jobs a lot. What's the big deal? I wouldn't say it a damn job. Either all of those, say I'm boring his hell. So yeah, 4,000 employees. So at least it's like, oh shit, sorry,'m sorry now. How many times are we gonna talk about the broth? Don't, you listen, don't make a lot of say, anybody. You'll apologize the broth stuff your life.

I apologize. What if we could have moved on to the Suzuki Papa? I'm nervous like, well, I talked to you about it months ago and you completely ignored me. I didn't ignore me and you were mad, nice, so we have nowhere to go. How did I turn it on you? Well, you accused me. I've called you Mancelio and that is extra- I'm not really disgusting to sing that because I did not do that.

And that's two months earlier, it's pervasive saying, I'm willing to move forward with you. If you get the help that you need as not being such an awful person Lisa. And yeah, if you do get help, then I'm here for you. But if you don't get help, I'm not here for you. And then Lisa said, what kind of help? And she says, I don't profess to be a doctor

So yeah, you did yeah, so Lisa's like oh, oh, so let's just set about a talk shot instead of working off a goddess That you know what let's do this is that that's really how big and she goes well I told you I can move forward Even though you try you can't let go. Something in your heart marks it hits up. Okay, stop it. We got it. People are obsessed with you. You didn't create Christmas enough with a bank catalog, okay?

So Lisa's like, if you were trying to stay in a good place with a friend, you don't try to find holes in their lifestyle. And when he goes, hit comes, it comes to intent. It comes to tense. It comes to going to R E I and buying tents to go camping. Yeah, it comes down to being intense. And Lisa's like, well, you're a lawyer. Oh, no Lisa, you're a lawyer. You know what in Tantas? Tantas are everything. Just, yes, my senior in Tantas. You haven't seen my Tantas. You've seen me upset one time. God forbid I get upset one time.

So in Meredith is like, and it's not, and one time it is a multitasking. A multitasking of times. And then she tells us, she's like, she has a time. A multitasking of things over the years like talking behind my Like not calling me when my father was dying or My canceling my makeup artist last minute the height of a global pandemic and the music Just this is on the sound effect goes just this is on the sound effect goes I don't you you you you you you you you you you you you can say what it was for me I was can we say diet drop who's a diet drop there's a tribe of Uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, over and over and over again. Yeah, so then how do the Whitney is like?

Well, how do we move forward when you sit at a table? Because if I move forward, I hit the table and things shake around a lot. So what do we, oh, back up chair and then turn around. OK, oh, but also how do we move forward when everyone remembers it differently, feels differently, knowing that we all love each other. How do we put down our Poles and our shields? Well guys, we have not talked about Heather's black eyes

So let's let's not talk about it anymore tonight because I know it's gonna make Heather uncomfortable Yeah, so Heather's like um work group of women with more in common than we wanted men and at the end of the day We need to put petty aside work group of women with more in common than we wanted met. And at the end of the day, we need to put petty aside. I think my my eye might be a metaphor for our friendship. We woke up and we don't understand where it's coming from. So we were patched and we just sweep it under the rug. Oh my god, she's bringing it up again, but we still can't talk about it. So the producers like, okay, so do you, you don't remember how it happened? I didn't say that.

I didn't ever say that. I didn't say I don't remember how it happened. I just said, I'm not talking about it. First rule of fight club. So there was a fight. No, you were in a club. No, you were in fight club. No, you were in fight club. I, you're in fight club. No, you're in

fight club. I yes, I wasn't fight club. I did get into a fight. And I was for girl, none of us have the abs for fight club. Okay, don't even bring that up. Well, me, Mike, fight club, don't forget. Oh, okay, was he? Yeah, I would do anything for you. So Whitney said, but I won't do that. But I won't do that. You're intense. Number one detective agency for women won't do that. But how did you get the black eye?

And Heather goes, well, if someone does a secret knock on your door, don't answer. Okay? To be clear, I'm still not sure what happened. Okay, so now you're saying that it was somebody knocking on your door in the middle of the night who did this. You're so fucking annoying. You know what at this point? I don't even care that you got hit in the eye. I'm on their side. What the fuck is this? The producer says, well, why don't you want to talk about it? Who are you trying to protect? Heather goes? Myself. Like, well, why don't you want to talk about it? Who are you trying to protect? Heather goes, myself. Like, okay. So what is this? Like James Gandalfini's ghost punch you in the face.

What happened? Yeah, really. She's afraid that she's going to look stupid because she was just drunk or she afraid that she's going to say it's Jen and that Jen's going to really kill her. Like, what is she talking about? Come on. This is unfair. And guess what?

You don't get to know either audience because we don't know. This is a bunch of bullshit. Yeah. So that's that. But it was, that was our big cliffhanger. I hope we do get to find out because it is kind of like, it is really bothering me. Like I really, really, really want to know. I really want to know. But like, it's also smart because man, I am like whipped into a frenzy right now. Oh, I'm tired now.

Tired? Well, guess what? My frenzy else. Like, it's over. It just dropped the, but I'm already like into ice cream. Like, I don't know what the hell you're even still doing at a microphone. I have a camera here to go pee pee. Well, we are logging off, but we still have, again, we have more content coming. We're gonna have the Christmas recaps coming and all that stuff.

So everyone have a happy Hanukkah and Christmas and Kwanza and whatever else you're celebrating, and we will catch you in the new year, although you'll still have content from us here. Bye everyone! AHHHHH! Watch what crap ends with like to think it's premium sponsors! Ain't no thing like Allison King! Ashley Savoni, she don't take no baloney!

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Somebody get us 10 C's of Betsy MD. Always the wiser, it's Allison Weisler. She's not harsh, she's Jill Hirsch! We're taking the gold with Brenda Silva. Erica, 500 days of summer! She's the Queen Bee, it's Sarah Lemke! Under your fasteners, it's Erin Casner! We love him madly, it's Kyle Podd, Chadly!

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Shannon out of a cannon Anthony. Let's take off with Tamla Plane. She ain't no shrinking violet cootar. We love you guys! Celebrity Beef, you never know if you're just gonna end up on TMZ or trending on Twitter or in court. I'm Matt Bellasife. And I'm Sydney Battle, and we're the host of Wonder E's new podcast, Dis and Tell.

Each episode explores a different iconic celebrity feud, from the build-up, why it happened, and the repercussions. What deserves session with these feud say about us? We're starting off with a pretty messy love triangle between Selena Gomez and Justin and Haley Bieber, a seemingly innocent TikTok of Selena talking about her laminated eyebrows. It's snowballed into a full-blown alleged feud. But it doesn't seem like fans are letting up anytime soon. Despite both Selena and the Bieber's making public statements denying any bad blood. How much of this is teen jealousy and lover's quarreling, and how much of it is a carefully crafted narrative designed to sell albums?

Follow this and tell wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen ad-free on the Amazon music or wonder yet. albums. Follow this and tell wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen ad-free on the Amazon Music or Wondry app.