Watch What Crappens - SellingSunset: Wedge Issue

Episode Date: September 9, 2020

Put on your most elegant Galia Lahav because Christine is shopping for her gothic Barbie wedding on season 3, episode 5 of Selling Sunset! It's another episode full of tense yet polite showdowns and overuse of the word "wedge." Plus, the bomb finally drops on Chrishell's doomed marriage. HAVE SOME ETIQUETTE!!Our Patreon Extras: https://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappensSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hey, Prime members, you can listen to Watch What Crapins Add Free on Amazon Music. Download the app today. Get ready for a double load of Queen of Hearts. It's me, Jujubee, and I return to guide sexy singles through some ronchy blind dates. Cameras off, voice only. Launching during pride, Queen of Hearts takes Miami by storm, with Daeders' Cuppe from Tampa Bayes, Just Chas, and Brittany Brave to name a few. Follow Queen of Hearts on Amazon Music or wherever you get your podcasts. Hello and welcome to Watcher Crappins, a podcast, but all that crap on Bravo and beyond, including Netflix, which is what we're talking about today. We're talking Selling Sunset. I'm Ben Mandelker of the Real House,

where there's a kitchen island, it's cartoon on Netflix. I mean, on YouTube, I mean, hey, Netflix, if you're interested, give me a call. But no, Real House, where there's a kitchen island is not on Netflix, not yet. And also the game brain podcast and joining me Is the wonderful and hilarious probably soon on Netflix because you're just so

talented Ronnie Karam of The Rose Prick Spatch Rose podcast. What's going on Ronnie? Well, thankful how lovely. Thanks man. Hey, you know what if you wish it if you if you we can think it into existence positive mental energy, PMA. I'm like living proof that that doesn't work, by the way. You're welcome, everybody. Spend your time on something else, okay? You know what works, thinking negatively

and complaining a lot. It's work for me so far, and I'm sticking with it. So fun. You guys go to crappensmerch.com, get your mask. You should be wearing a mask. If it's not our mask, where are some other mask? But you should be wearing a mask. We are still in a pandemic. I swear over Labor Day weekend, there were all these photos of so many people just like like gathered together like clumps of grapes and I'm like people Can we be like more intelligent? there is a pandemic going on like you

wouldn't do this if everyone had the flu right so just be smart and definitely wear a mask so we of course are are shilling our masks because they're funny they all have bravo stuff and inside jokes like crap inside jokes or crap it's merch.com for that and today Let's dive into one of our favorite shows to cover selling sunset such a great show I got that boom boom power got that power I'm looking for you while They had a song boom pow and then they showed a close up of someone wearing a dress that says boom and pow on it.

Oh, I mean, come on, it's a lot of work that goes into this story. The artistry. The artistry, I got the boom pow, and what I can't tell is which part of that was bespoke. Like, did they make a dress and have a woman walk down the street and it, because they already had the boom pow song, did they make did they do they actually Tell Trixie listen we got this great footage of a woman in a boom pow dress We need you to give us some good content that we can play over it Yeah, and then she turned in her first song. I was like cow

You're a cow and I'm a girl girl girl girl no Trixie. That's rude. You can't just call someone a cow all right Let's see No, Trixie, that's rude. You can't just call someone a cow All right Let's see All right, we'll just go with that. Okay. Here's what I want to do. Okay, all right Paul Start recording Paul. Okay. Okay. I got that boom boom pow Boom boom pow. That was actually a hit song. Oh come on now. That's what it gets okay What happens if we drop the pat? Let's drop one of the booms, or I got the boombow. I got the boombow.

Genius, lock it, send it to Selling Sunset, we're using it. And then she goes to each Chinese food that night and sees Kung Pao. She's like, the robaists, they robbed me. Yeah. The robaists. The robaists. Tricks, I'm saying.

That's the big Chinese food, boy. I'm sick of it. I'm sick of it. Okay. Next thing you knew that's gonna be a something that's gonna be making take it a take off of rip off of my hit song Usu pork right? Usu pork. Usu pork. Oh god damn it. That's a Usu pork. It's ridiculous. So we're at the Queensborough house. Five bedrooms, six baths, nine million dollars. So, Kraschel and Amansa and Mary are all going to visit this insanely, decadent house. Oh, decadent, that's a good word too.

I was gonna say tacky. And tacky, yes, tacky, tacky dent. Tacky dent. Dentinant. So, yeah, they, dentinant. So yeah, they're at this house. And Khrushcheol is like, they call it the Versace House

because there's so much Versace in it. Like Versace Wall paper, paper Versace plates of Versace Badez, like stuff that I didn't know Versace even made. And it's all here. Yeah. And Khrushcheol's like, you know, of course, being a good agent we're always thinking of a good buyer,

but obviously we want to see it ourselves. Call me Donatella. So they take a tour of this tacky-lish house and Kraschel's like, oh look, we match, Mary, because they're both wearing black, but also Kraschel and Amanz are both wearing that Charo ponytailony tail. So everybody is kind of matching. I also don't think it's a huge feat to match when you're both wearing black. That's a pretty low bar. It's like saying you're both, it's like, oh, we're both wearing pants. You're both wearing totally different styles of dresses, but they just happen to be black,

which is like starter color, right? When in doubt, you wear a black something black. So I don't think you get credit for saying we both match. Starter color right like like when in doubt you were you were a black something black So I don't think you get credit for saying we both match We're besties we're both wearing black Yeah, the furniture's ridiculous. There's a Bentley couch. Oh, god. Oh my god. There's a zipper on the couch All the girls go. I know oh my god. I know this is it. You guys look. There's a zip there's another zipper guys Two zippers Oh my god, I know

Two zippers. Oh my god that couch is matching that couch. They both have zippers. Oh my god Is this couch a hybrid does it take is it hybrid can you plug it in it's Bentley right? They start Talking about the house of stuff and touring it and they see the big movie room and Chris tells like let's watch Mean Girls. That was an awful movie room. Those couches look so uncomfortable for sitting down and watching a movie for two hours. They were like vertical backs and vertical sides, you know. Movie rooms always miss the mark for me on these shows. I don't know if it's just how they shot because I've never been in a real movie room, but it always looks like the actual screen

looks like it's too lit. Mm. It's like, how does it ever get, do you get a true movie picture in here or is it just a place to say, look, I have a movie room? Yeah, I think it's the latter, to be honest. Also, when they went downstairs to the movie room,

they like, you, I think you mentioned last week that when Christine and Heather were walking down a driveway, they got their own special music. And there was, these girls got their own special music for walking down the stairs to the basement. And it was funny because the music changes and the only lyric they allowed Trixie to sing was heard to go, oh. I was like, what? It was just like this random like staircase moment of, oh, of course, they start yapping about the party. Chris shows like, Amanda, you were missing that party.

And we're like, yeah, there was great food. It was great. Also, by the way, you should mention the way they started the conversation, which is the classic thing that they do on this show, even though they see each other every single episode in the office. Chris shall go to Manza. I feel like I haven't seen anyone forever. Which is like, it's like they always have seen that. It has been so long.

So, Chrishell's like, oh my God, those same people are supposed to cater my event. My God, you're just stealing everything. You really are. Chrishell's really good at throwing an event. Just have it in a house you've already got. Have everybody else do stuff for it and don't eat stuff to it.

And then just steal the caterer for the last event you were at. My swerk. Hey Mary, can you come to this event a little early and help me set up that be great? I see that you're walking very steadily. I am imagining you've been walking around that sloping study. You know that we saw last week,

so that's really kind of corrected you a little bit, so could you help me out? And she's like, yeah, I'll be there. And she touches a zebra chair. She goes, oh my god, is this a real zebra? Because it feels like it. And the man says like, not anymore. I like to think that they think that

zebra's actually look like Ottomans. Like, oh my God. Like, it's an ottoman. I mean, it's a zebra. They go on a safari and they're like, oh my God, are those Ottomans out there? Just take's picture. I went to the most amazing ottoman and it was actually like right downstairs from crunch fitness like oh you went to CB2 didn't you? Did I say ottoman or safari? I don't know what I'm saying anymore You said ottoman. I know I realized I was like wait a second now. I'm actually talking like them guys. I went into an ottoman

Guys, you know that there is an entire empire based on zebra's Little also they talk about a man's are getting custody and stuff and then outside They go down both sides of the stairs to feel fancy and chrysal just waves like she's a beauty queen And she's like I'll be the mistress of the house. Penelope got my monitor. And the music's like oh wow. So then so Krashelle, Amanda goes, Krashelle's like bring me the sweet tea. So Krashelle whips out her Kentucky accent. She's like you can put bitch into the oven. They don't make a biscuit. I thought of you immediately.

I was like, that's something that Ronnie probably says to Bueller all the time. So Mary is like, so Christine says she wants to talk. So we got a talk at some point. And Amanda's like, I am so sick of her stirring up shit. She prances in her, into the office and her fancy outfits and makes a joke and thinks it's okay. And it's not, and I'm sick of it.

And it's bullshit. I got a punny towel. Two, okay. Yeah, like I have a punny towel too. I could have money and dress like that too. I mean, shit, let me sell a 40 million dollar house. And then we get a lot of shots of cheesy L.A. and Christina and Heather are together. Yeah. And they're going to the wedding shop. Galle Le Hav. Hi, welcome to Galle Le Hav. I'm burning up Peters, wannabe daughter.

What can I help you with? Hollywood gobb. What's it called? Galle la Hav. Galle la Hav. Galle la Hav. It's Galle la Hav. But it's like the perfect, it's the perfect bridal suite for, or bridal place for Los

Angeles accents. Hi, welcome to Galle la Hav. Hello, Galle. Have you been to Galle la Hav before? Welcome. Have you given the thought to your style here, Havvethore? And Christine's like, I wanted to do like, one dress for the wedding and then change.

Like, whoever said I don't want to wear two dresses, I'm not doing a white dress, by the way. I want, blah, blah, blah. Oh wow, we've never done black, I've got it all Havvethore. Wow. We've never, never in the history of ever of God all-hove never Christine's like I found

You're my dress maker like I feel like they're so gothic Barbie like if you can pull off Garth If you can pull off Garth gothic Barbie you can pull off anything And you know how many things I had to pull off to afford this girl Both circle God damn it knew that I want a gothic law from gone off By the way, isn't like a black wedding dress just like a standard elegant black dress you see on a red carpet It's like who how will she ever pull off a color that is famously, famously used for

any occasion? Yeah. Um, well, because it's a wedding dress, how are you going to find a wedding dress and black? You have to go to a car wash. Go to a half-cannu anything! So she's trying them on and there's like, oh my god, ear babes look amazing. She goes, I know, right?

Yeah. Um, my, like, my ideal wedding dress would probably like sleek and sexy and low cut with like a light sparkle at the top, you know, like, but I still don't have a ring. We keep thinking it might happen. Uh, but no, no, it's gonna happen. He says it's gonna happen. Probably one of those expected. I know that he has a fishing trip on a pontoon lined up,

so probably around then, but I don't know. Just waiting. Just waiting. Got a wedding ring at. It's been three weeks. So take good time, buddy. So then, Kristi is next look. She comes out with this, it's like mermaid style and the dress has like mesh along

her ass and she's like, look, my ass is literally out in the sky all hard dress right now. Heather goes, oh my god, I can see your ass and I like it. Abba, sashtop, sashtop, with a sky all hard. So... And she and Christine's like, well, I think we could do something more with Maleficent vibes, like, Austret's feathers. Guess what I want. I want Goth like more opposite of Austret's gau-hav. Uh.

Uh, so she tries on another one. And Heather's like, are you going to Crishell's charity thing? She's, um, I spend all day in the office with these girls. That is a charity event. I hope you like that joke. I'm gonna say atrasil's charity thing and she's, um, I spend all day in the office with these girls. That is a charity event. I hope you like that joke. I'm gonna say at the rest of the episode. This is the charity event. Okay, being here, going to the hog right now. A man's head is so rude and so aggressively unnecessarily. So, I mean, why can't she just be like the bitches in this group and just talk behind each other's back and be nice to each other's faces.

Garma ha! I love what Garma ha! I love what qualifies as being super aggressive as a man's being like, yeah I just don't think you should have done that. It's like oh my god she is super aggressive. If the people at Garhaav ever knew how aggressive she were, they would never let her end like, oh, oh, oh, oh. So then we go to Maya showing James and one of my favorite, one of my favorite things about LA is how everybody just respelled their name.

It's like they get off the bus in Los Angeles and they're like, I can't just be Caitlin. I have to be Caitlin back. Yeah. And you just go, see AITLYNT-L-Y-N-D-E. Yeah. She added a D in a Y. There's always a Y in a place you don't expect it.

It's like, my name is Olivia Spell, O-L-Y-V-I-A-N-D-E. It's like, is that Olivia? Yeah, no, the N-D-E is silent. It's so funny to me, because you know she's probably some girl from the South name, Kathy Linda. Kathy Linda, she was born in the arms of Kathy Linda at a shell station. Kathy Linda shells are full in. And so now she goes like,

Kate Linda. So this is on William Drive. It's 4.2 mil and it's like, hello guys. Welcome to 1901. Welcome to to 1902 and all, huh? Yeah, you know, I may not have $9 million client, like Mary, but I have four million dollar ones. I mean, I may not have well in my database or living in Athens, we say in Hebrew, but I have dolphins, I have a couple of dolphins. I could do this all day, day, day, day, day.

Oh, so she shows in the house there's a custom island, a fresh, tricky song, and the lady's like, oh my god, I like it. Very open floor plan. Yeah. And the husband is like, we want to put in like four million and see what the reaction is. I was like, okay, there's like, I feel like there's more I would like to dive into with this couple right now, but we're not getting enough of them, but I would like to see more. Well, I would hope since they would put in full asking since it is off market that they

could do it, they, you know what? We'll just have to see dolphins. Dolphins, plastic dolphins. I think dolphins. Here I am having my own scene for once. I got these two fucking dolphins asking for less than asking on a private showing on Willam and Drive. So Christine is in full on gay pride for her. Yeah. She's celebrating, she's representing.

Yeah, at that place on Robertson, I forget the name of it. Gaulil Hockoff here. Yeah, at that place on Robertson, I forget the name of it. Golly, I'll have coffee there. Going home. Taking a picture there on my Instagram. Okay, so good. What? What's that about? The alpha coffee?

No, I don't think it was an actual coffee shop. Or was it? Was it this? I went to a restaurant. It was a... Nevermind, who cares? No one cares where we're with. The IV. Okay, so Mary meets her up with her.

I don't know what's- what the fuck is wrong with me today? Mary meets up with her for coffee. That was not very hard to say. I'm going to grind. So Mary's like, oh my god. So, dreading talking to Christine. Like, I've managed to avoid her, but I can't. So, I guess we're just gonna have to sit and dish it out.

Weren't they okay? When did they start fighting you guys? No, so they were fine. They were fine. They made up for the wedding. And then what happened was that, like, I someone was at a manza or a creshell told Mary that the day before

Like that when when Heather had her showing and crescent was like making fun of her that listing Be like she has like an idiot she has like an idiot which was the day before she apologized But they brought it up and now she's like oh yeah But didn't they already fight about this and makeup again? Outswifes so hard to tell they're they really like, they are not in the best place right now. So Marios here, and Christine's like, I just, I want to catch up since I'm getting married and I don't want to fight with you because I love you so much. Like, obviously I love you so much.

That's why I've talked so much shit about you for the past two seasons of this show. I love you so much. Well, I don't want to fight again. That's why I've talked so much. Shoot about you for the past two seasons of this show. I love you so much. Well, I don't want to fight again. We had a conversation and then I find out you calling your fucking idiot. So she's like, well, I didn't say you weren't idiot. I said you were acting, acting like an idiot.

I was frustrated. Yeah, I took it out on you. So that was my bat. Mary, oh God, you just build your coffee on your lap. Okay, okay. Do we need it? Do we have a seatbelt for Mary? Do we have a seatbelt? Mary is like, I just don't want this in my life. Like I feel like you're so angry. Chris seems like um, it's just hard to talk to you, especially never that man's is there. It's like she's putting a wedge there she's

like putting a salad or shoe I don't care but it's between us take your pick and Mary's like well I don't speak up a lot and a man's is kind of like you are and if she has a mistake she'll probably say it and she probably said it so you know that's just the way it is, you know. And she protects me. And Christine's like, well, the thing is, like, you don't defend Mary because it won't get you anywhere. That's what I've learned. And she laughs and mirrors like, uh, yeah, don't defend me.

Okay, you know what? Just, let's just give her a chance. Let's start over because it's important that you give her a chance. Like she's been one of my best friends for like 19 years. So she's not going anywhere. She's totally understand. I just just like here's what I need I need her like back off and have some etiquette okay back off I'll have some ala got um celebrity beef you never know if you're just gonna end up on TMZ or trending on Twitter

or in court. I'm Matt Bellasife. And I'm Sydney Battle. And we're the hosts of WonderZ's new podcast, Dis and Tell. Each episode explores a different iconic celebrity feud, from the build-up, why it happened, and the repercussions. What does our obsession with these feuds say about us? We're starting off with a pretty messy love triangle between Selina Gomez and Justin and Haley Beaver.

A seemingly innocent TikTok of Selina talking about her laminated eyebrows. It snowballed into a full-blown alleged feud. But it doesn't seem like fans are letting up anytime soon. Despite both Selina and the Bebers making public statements denying any bad blood. How much of this is teen jealousy and lovers quarreling, and how much of it is a carefully crafted narrative designed to sell albums? Follow this and tell wherever you get your podcasts. You can lace an ad free on the Amazon music or wonder ya.

Did you notice that Mary just kept bouncing in her chair? It was like she was on like a, it was almost like she was on like Indiana Jones, the Indiana Jones ride into his new world. She was like bouncing on that chair. Like Mary, Mary, settle down. Yeah. It's like, I don't wanna fight either.

Like, you're kind of scary, bitch. I'm just like, yeah, I'm a scary batch. It's like chairs, chairs is scary, crazy, bitch like, yeah, I'm a scary batch. Like, cheers. Cheers to scary, crazy bitches. Okay. Batches with Attica. I can't even believe you're getting married in a church. Just, it's gonna go up and flame, so I walk in.

Don't rest me. Ah! Let's go. I'm gonna show you what I'm all about. I'm gonna show you all the things I do. I can't stop the rhythm when it's going for me and you I'm a money money money money money money money make her So it's the charity event and Mary comes in and Picks of poor people are being put up everywhere in this mansion. Yeah, the tapes windows like look at the poor people as we stand around this mansion. Yeah, the tapes, the windows. Like, look at the poor people as we stand around this mansion.

As we like bid on cryo vagina sessions or whatever. Let's look at these poor people. Yeah, before you spend four million dollars on this house, we do request that you throw a few dollars at this orphan who actually has no house or food whatsoever. So, Amanta and Mary both show up to help and they have to wear like shoes other than stilettos which is crazy. Oh my god, how some etiquette. And Mary does the unthinkable. She decides to pick up a chair while she's in her heels and I mean, it was just full Mary.

I was waiting for her just to topple over. I, we've been waiting for her to just do a just face plant, right? Like we've been waiting for this moment and this felt like it was the closest that we were gonna get. You're carrying a chair. In heels was pretty good. Yeah. Whoa.

Whoa. Whoa. So she tells me, she's just like running, just, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh want him here. I mean, he didn't do anything really bad, but he lied about something, about the vat's lore party, or, uh, no. Yeah, I had one role, and the role was, don't bring girls up to the hotel room. And then I find out that Bret and Jason brought girls up. And I said I had to do Shbag, like a total douchebag,

and he had like, his undating apps while we were together. And totally cheated on me the entire time. And I'm like like totally traumatized. And I said, you know what I'm gonna do? My next relationship, I'm gonna get a relationship with a young, early 20s model from France. And I'll never be hurt again. It'll never see about me, surely.

And I'll send him up to Vegas with... Friends model. Two very short men who need to prove themselves through the sort of women that they can attract. And I'll send him off to Vegas with a friend. And he'll send him off to Vegas with a friend. And I'll send him off to Vegas with a friend. And I'll send him off to Vegas with a friend. And I'll send him off to Vegas with a friend. And I'll send him off to Vegas with a friend. And I'll send him off to Vegas with a friend. And I'll send him off to Vegas with a friend. And I'll send him off to Vegas with a friend.

And I'll send him off to Vegas with a friend. And I'll send him off to Vegas with a friend. And I'll send him off to Vegas with a friend. And I'll send him off to Vegas with a friend. And I'll send him off to Vegas with a friend. And I'll send him off to Vegas with a friend. And I'll send him off to Vegas with a friend. And I'll send him off to Vegas with a friend.

And I'll send him off to Vegas with a friend. And I'll send him off to Vegas with a friend. And I'll send him off to Vegas with a friend. And I'll send him off to Vegas with a friend. And I'll send him off to Vegas with a friend. And I'll send him off to Vegas with a friend. And I'll send him off to Vegas with a friend. And I'll send him off to Vegas with a friend. And I'll send him off to Vegas with a friend. And I'll send him off to Vegas with a friend. And I'll send him off to Vegas with a friend. of fucking cheese and he'll be there. Trust me. Exactly how many cubes of cheddar do you have because he's gonna be here.

He's coming. Like saying candy man in the mirror three times, you know, it's like put out three cubes of cheese. Roman will be there. So a man says like, oh, it's Christine coming because I brought a wedge together. I mean, it's just stupid. How could I drive a wedge between a friendship that's not really even existing right now? You know, wedge, right everyone?

Wedge. Hey, you know, my favorite simple machine is wedge. So Maya and Heather and Davina show up and they're all these donation items and one of them is coffee with Justin Hartley and Krishogles. Yeah, that's my husband, by the way. So yeah. Very relevant. Did you notice Davina and Heather taking selfies like in smiling like hey, in front of the

poor people poster? I don't know. But that is so them. Sending this one out to odd dawn. So Christine comes in, of course, as the most she comes in and like a red dress and a big fair, her big fur thing. And Amanda's like, is she Marilyn Monroe? Oh, she has issues.

I'm just going to sit over here and be quiet, but I'm going to keep like twisting my face really straight Postard like at her like and then turning away again and then looking at her again Just show how much I don't give a shit. Hey Is this a waaange of cheese? Wajjichis, Kristian, would you call this a waaange of cheese? Wajjichis, this is why Romain showed up. She said that Wajjichis joke so many times that he was like Sitting there at bed his ears perked up like a cat like, what is this? Wedge of Cheese

on Goldwater Canyon? I don't know what, Amanda is trying to accomplish with these lame dad jokes. Have some Attica. Have some Att in. He's like, which which is a little cheese, okay? When Romaine shows up, the music changes and it's you're going down, down, down, down, you're going down, down, down, down, so Mary, so dedicated to the cheese. The Mary standing there,

staring like, you know, angrily andly and she's teetering on her heels, trying to give him a dirty look across the room. Then Krishokas, Mary, Romaine's here just so you know. Also, our delivery of Romaine led us to arrive as well. If you can help me set that up, you did promise. He comes and he's all she's all mad at him still And I'm as it's like um Mary. I think you're driving. Oh, wait between me and Romain's friendship Okay, so hey, I want to get it on this You're also driving a wedge between me and sleep because you with your girl problems called me up and we're talking You so late at night when I could've been having sex with hot girls.

I mean, Mary's like, yeah, cause I called him last night. I was like, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, it was very difficult to hear Mary because she kept hitting the numbers on her phone. So it was more like, fuck, beep, fuck, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, I think she called Domino's at one point with her ear. So Heather and Christina Davina are sitting on the couch watching everybody and Heather goes, everyone looks so pretty.

And Christine goes, everyone looks like Slot. How's the Maddenket? Heather goes, I love a Mance of Strasse and DeVina be the goes I do to just I doubt And then a man's is like um Christina keeps looking over at me and I'm just annoyed I mean I'm more annoyed than if I ordered a Caesar and got a wedge wedge So my comes over to Jason or to Brad or Jason whichever and and she's like I close william williamalzide The owner accepted my offer. It was nice offer, but I didn't think he was going to accept the but you know, hey, I'll take it

Yes, the buyer said Good job girlfriend. You are fierce. I said thanks. Let me speak to your wife now and you are fierce. I said, thanks, let me speak to your wife now. So Maya's like, do I get a listing now? And Jason says, listen, I don't wanna have to pre-sale. I don't wanna have to reciprocate every sale with one of my own listings, all right? And the man's like, hey, I wanna listen too.

He's like, you still haven't sold literally anything. Not a single thing. And Maya's like, I could sell most expensive property in the LA and he still wouldn't sold literally anything. Not a single thing. Am I as like, I could sell most expensive property in LA and he still wouldn't give me a listing. Yes, you know, you know what I say about that? What do you call a dolphin with no listing? Tuna fish meat. Okay, it's a joke.

It's a joke, because it's all for the helmets, you know. Brett has brought his girlfriend, and she's totally age-appropriate, just kidding. It's like some really young girl named Katya. Yeah, she's a sweetie, sweetie, sweetie, sweetie. This is Katya, Katya, Khrushchev. Yeah, her name is actually, I don't really know what her real name is, I just saw her and said,

Katya, all right, now you're stuck with me Don't speak Don't say anything young join a crew. Alright don't speak until you're spoken to Christine goes to Mary goes Kacha looks like if you and me had a baby ew and also awesome ew had some etiquette and me had a baby. Ew, and also awesome. Ew, have some etiquette. I'm some etiquette.

I mean, like, it's you and me if we got really good no-stop and good fellers. Like, gosh, you guys are so vicious and God just standing there with no one to talk to and they're being mean and looking right at her while they talk. Really? She just wants some potatoes, kids.

So Maya's like, so, Dvina, So I'm gonna go to Miami, because you know what Miami's football team is called? Miami Dolphins. See, study for Broker's license down there. So I want to talk to you because you do stupid things with your Broker's license and I want to know what not to do. And she's like, I don't love Jason's support to me. Deep Venus says, I'm not getting your license in Florida.

Why wouldn't you support that? She's like, well, you know, I like it's marketing, but what rubbed me the wrong way is the favorite him. Like I do think, like maybe I should do my own thing. Uh, okay. And then Jason walks up. Like I do think like maybe I should do my own thing. Uh, okay. And then Jason walks up as, hey guys, just want you guys to know, I just gave a lead to Katya. So just letting everyone know Katya, great work.

Chrishell, you got the bell ring. So Christine pulls a message. She's like, hi, baby. Can I talk to you for a minute? Yeah, and so they go in the talk and Christine's like it's just super awkward for me like I walked in and you snobbed me and even say wow you're like beautiful not guy. Oh, I'm wearing Well, I snubbed you because I had a conversation with Mary the other day and I didn't like what I heard so I'm super annoyed Yeah, and then

Maya's just talking about how like there's always competition for Mary like always Mary, you know And I mean it's like yeah, and the funny thing is that Mary doesn't even seem to care she's so Privilege stupid bitch So Christine's like it's been really hard because like you've been in the middle a little bit. Well, I'm driving a wedge between you and Mary's friendship. It's just really hard to talk to her. Um, why not allow you to talk to her? Uh, the wedding for one.

That was really difficult. Oh, I definitely don't remember that. Stop lying! Stop lying! Stop your lying! Um, well, maybe I just have like a lot of important shit in my life. That's like a really stressful and I don't remember, like petty little girl stuff. Oh my god, you think no one else has stressful things in their life?

Have you ever had a microwave that's drawer style? Um... Like how does it even open? I don't even know what a drawer is, because maybe I'm focusing on bigger things in life, you know? So like maybe just process drawers differently. So like maybe it affects me differently. I don't remember things like that.

So how about I don't be snubby and you try and be a little more nice. Fine. And she's like, it's been real. Christine's real annoying hashtag etiquette. So my end of the end of Christine are talking, my psychotic things cool. It's like, my IQ went down just standing there. Like, I know this is a charity event, and that was charity. Just me being there.

I should be getting on. Boom boy, y'all. etiquette. So she storms out. Neal, he gets run over by cars and cold water canya and then Krashelle is like, all right guys, bidding closes in 15 minutes so if you're looking for some brand new candles from Amanda or coffee with my husband, who is my husband, Justin Hartley, you have 15 minutes and looks like Romaine just ate

the last pepperoni so it looks like we're really in the final, final push here. And she starts dancing around and then it's go slow on her, the camera starts to really slow, slow motion fade. So we know why. As for Selle has her last fun moment at the poor people party. Her last moment of innocence when she could say that Justin Hartley is her husband. Little did she know she was about to be poor. Yes. So, by the way, you know she's going to be on Dancing with the Stars. Yeah, I saw that. Oh, God. Oh, the smelly kid finally gets to dance. So the next day it's the office and Heather and

Amanda are talking about that house that they're staging where Heather picked out the art that she loved every piece, and how she picked up the art without seeing the staging, and then Amanda's doing the staging without having seen the art. Crazy! And Amanda's like, you picked it blindly, she goes, it pops! And they're like, oh my god, if she chose the wrong art, it's gonna be bad. Wait a second, are you guys talking about the final? The final, the final, I wanna hear this, I wanna hear this, okay, I'm gonna stand here. Alright, say it again, I'm standing here. Well, what I did was California and modern neutrals. And then there's like, I put a mess color.

And Jason's like, so the color of Christine Shoes, most of these shoes Most of these buyers are males you know that lady is right people with boom Stupid faces bunch of stupid faces call me up late at night and talk me and put a wedge between me and my sleep you stupid faces And then there's like I actually put up my playboy centerfold picture who's thought that would be cute Okay, I'm okay with that. So Heather's like, well, I'm very girly. So I went with like, what would Heather do? He goes, uh, why would you do that? You're not the buyer.

You stupid, stupid person. Oh, God, girls, gross. God, what would Heather do? No one's gonna want to buy a house that can't through a baseball. Am I right? Yeah. Girls with a stupid conversation is about stupid things. So then

Christine's like, guys, guys, guys, guys, guys, guys. I just got a TMZ Googler about crucial because that's what I do. I have Google alerts about crucial. That was funny, right? So you said a Google alert for Michelle. No, Chris. I know that's what I'm sorry and Michelle whoever Michelle is Michelle I got a Google air bomb Michelle Obama. Oh She said a Google alert for Christel That's what that was by the way so funny. So she's like Justin Hartley at fouls for it the boys They're like no no way And then Jason of course no, I thought they were a forever couple

So then Jason is like yeah guys. It's all over the internet right now I'm like don't act like you knew what this was if you knew what it was you would have said something You would be like God let's be nice to crochet today like I hate that that he's like yeah, yeah, it's all over the internet And mine is like well what happened. How could someone just file? Yeah, how did that happen? How'd you do that? So Mary's like, guys, I'm gonna call a crucial. Okay. Bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo-bippo That makes me sad. She's not answering! Hehehehehehehehe

Guys, she's not answering. Look at my phone. I'm showing you the phone so you can see that she's not answering. That's the stapler, Mary. Oh, sorry. Wait, this. She's not answering. Don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don, don, don't, don't, don't, don't, don, okay. Well, the artwork matched the staging. By the way, why did she pick out colors if she didn't know what the staging was? Wouldn't she go with neutrals? What do you mean? What? What's the question? Sorry, okay. I was like, oh, bye. I'm like, I'm over. Bye. You're going to be like, I'm going to be like,

Would it, if you, if a man is picking out, if she's picking out staging, you have no idea what the staging is, and you have to, and art is not your forte, when she just go with neutral, a neutral color palette with the art. I would go with colors

because your art is not supposed to match your house. Like it doesn't have to match the colors, it's art. Well, I guess we're going to find out. I guess we're going it's art well I guess we're gonna find I guess where I learned that it's JTV so anybody want to argue with my degree in HGTV I don't think so why am I more invested in this art staging situation that I am in Crescendo's divorce I don't know well I know I literally don't care like the final thoughts the episode I'm like guys shouldn't you go with neutral locks I mean have some etiquette.

Well, Heather would really have to screw up to choose bad art because that was some really good art that we saw at that gallery. I think any of that would look fine. I agree, that was good art and, um, and also whether it was that woman's house, so she probably would have said something like, no, I don't think this would be very good in my living room. That's your selling for me, your stupid wench. Yeah. Well, that brings us to the end of selling sunset. Will Crisale survive this? We'll remain fine more snacks. We'll do reate, move into Crisale's house, like a vulture. We'll amands find something else to call a wedge.

Will Crisene never stop saying, Ennecate! Will Heather get a ring. Next time, maybe we'll find out. Next time, we're halfway through the season, OMG, what's got a hops? I know, me well, all of our audience already knows what happened.

I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, we're the only people on Earth, you don't know. We're the only ones watching episode by once a week. And my friend Lauren, she's watching week by week at our pace, in honor of our pace. Aw, that's how you have to watch this stuff. Come on guys, week by week. And I have to say it's hard because I just want to keep letting it roll. I love it.

I love it. I love this show. Well guys, thanks for listening. We are back tomorrow with some more real Huswaves of Beverly Hills. Maybe. So everyone get ready to get your knives out because I know everyone's going to be fuming because everyone already was fuming from the first episode. We'll have lots to talk about. I'm sure we'll have, we'll just be so angry.

I mean, we have, I'm sure we'll have... We'll just be so angry, I mean we have... Yeah. I'm saving it for tomorrow. Saving it for tomorrow. Saving it. Bye guys! Byeeere! Mmm.

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