Watch What Crappens - Shahs: Like a Cat on a Hot Tin Spoof

Episode Date: August 31, 2021

It's the conclusion of the Shahs of Sunset reunion, and Mike is here to clarify that he didn't get one spoof text. He received many. And so did Nema! But it only happened one time. But also ten times. Also, Reza doesn't want a baby anymore (spoof plans!), and GG is more into polyamory than ever. Hopefully she'll get to try it soon!Our Patreon Extras: https://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappensSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Get ready for a double load of Queen of Hearts! It's me, Jujubee, and I return to guide sexy singles through some ronchy blind dates. Cameras off! Voice only! Launching during Pride! Queen of Hearts takes Miami by storm, with Daeders Cupi from Tampa Bayes, Just Chaz and Brittany Brave to name a few. Follow Queen of Hearts on Amazon Music or wherever you get your podcasts. Watch what crap is watch what crap is Who cares what happens when there's so much that crap is Who's what happens

Who's what happens Who's what happens Watch what happens Watch what crap is Who cares what happens when there's so much Who's what happens Who's what happens Who cares what happens Hello and welcome to Watcher Crapins, a podcast battle that I crap on bravo that we just love to watch. I'm Ben Mandelker, you can find me on the game brand podcast if you're a board game kind of person

like I am and joining me as usual is the wonderful and hilarious Ronnie Keram. What's up Ronnie? How you doing? Well, hello little Benini. Hi, you know, I should also I just want to also add another pitch. I keep talking about game brain, but I've been writing some articles for the dip and I've done a lot about Peloton, but I've also been running about Love Island UK, which wrapped up already in the UK, but not in America, but it's wrapping up soon.

So if you are a Love Island UK fan, the way I am, go check out some of the things I wrote about it on the dip, the dip, it's DIP, the dip. The dip. Dot com. The dip. The dip, dip, dip, dip, dip, dip. And today, today we're talking about something that's not love Island, but just as petty.

It's the Shah's the sunset, part two reunion or reunion part two. Yeah. Here we go. Our favorite group of toxic friends. The Shah's the sunset. These people are terrible. These are basically all Ramonu singers on the show. They do the most horrible things to each other, and then they just go,

sorry, but I love you, we're brothers. I'm so sorry, my brother. And then they hug, and then they just go back to dream together like, I mean, I think they apologize to each other, and then completely stab each other in the back like 10 times just in this reunion. I know, over and over again, every single year, every single episode, it's like

they can't live with being in a feud. So they just have to ultimately brush it under the rug and just declare that they're family. And then because they never really deal with their issues, where they never come to terms with the fact that they have just moved on from each other in life, they just keep fighting. And in a sense, it's great. I mean, that's sort of what we want from reality stars.

I mean, look what happened to Vanderpump rules once they all decided they would grow up and kind of meet each other where everyone was. The show just started to tank. So, you know, thank you all for the same immaturity, you know? Yeah. Where am I? I'm already lost in my, yes. It is for that, I think that the... You know what I, it is. I think that the producers probably told them guys this show is way too toxic.

People said it was way too dark last year. So no matter what happens, make sure you just ended on a good note because I keep just trying to end everything on a good note, but it just keeps going. And he's like, wow, you guys are getting a lot great. All right, Rhys, I remember when you called MJ Fatter, whatever it is. You know, you guys are getting a lot great. All right, Reza, remember when you called MJ Fatter, whatever it is, you know, you'll just keep stoking it. Andy could not have looked more bored in the second hour of the reunion.

He clearly wants to go back to the hotel. And he's like, do other really more questions? All right, all right. So he starts talking like this, like a sleepy baby. You know, you just see them start to start to nod off Well, you were Little bottle so the cliffhanger that we left on last week was with destiny and Paul ballina and I live hanger that we left on last week was with Destiny and Paul Polina. And Destiny is saying, every single time he talked shit about me, Polina, every even that

night, you know what you said to me in the bathroom. And you don't damn well. I've been there from the beginning and had your back. And I'd never went anywhere until anyone, anything about anywhere, about anyone anything about anywhere about anyone about anything Anywhere anything anyone you have done Well, it's like Yeah, because someone repeat destiny, please Yeah, I'm probably just like I will say one thing now. I will link so we stand it down

Er, that night. Oh, yeah, what about the other nights and the other text, Paulina? Yo. Listen, I'm not seeing anything. And so Andy goes, so Paulina, do you remember what you said in the bathroom? I don't know. I don't know.

Yeah. And Gigi's like, is it okay for her to say what you told her? Like, is she okay to say it? Um, but I don't know what I ain't saying. Yeah, but can she say what you said? Because she's ready to say it. She's like, well, I don't know. I'm ready to go, no, don't say anything out loud.

Who's shadow puppets? So then Destiny is like, you know, she may let you know what she said, or like she says this to Mike. She may let you know what she said or like she says this to Mike. She may let you know what she said or may not, but I don't care because I will never say what she said out of respect. I'm just going to talk about that I know what she said and sort of suggest and that it was really bad. I've got a secret. Yaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh gotta see. Yeah. I'm like, so I think you thank you very much.

Well, do you think that she knows too much, Paulina? And Paulina is like, well, I do think that I can fast too much. Share me one and I got them involved. And that was my biggest mistake. No, you're sitting next to your biggest. I was about to say, is this all worth it for you? What are you doing, Pauline? What are you been doing?

Okay, pick a lane, lady. And Andy goes, well, I think that's as far as we're gonna get on this one. No, that's a lie. There's actually, we could press, she will talk. Paulina will talk. You just have to press her more, but Andy just wants to move forward. So, he says that, but then the next segment see exact same thing. I know, I was also confused by that.

I was like, but didn't you say that's it? Like, we're just go back to it now. So it's Halloween and hey, so how did Nima do? Dress is MJ for Halloween. MJ is like, well, I was super impressed, you know, the over the line, over the lip contour, that was really amazing. Yeah, there's literally two of us. There's like, him great, and then there's me.

It's like literally the both of us right now. And Andy's like, well, Resl-john, did you and MJ plan to come up, come dress as hippies? I mean, come on, that was crazy. You got your destiny best friends, right? Uh-huh. That was a complete coincidence. So then, so before the party, Pauline told Destiny, Mike was caught 10 times, sexting others. So Andy goes, so those 10 instances were those,

I can't believe I'm gonna say this, the spoof text instances. Yeah, I thought they were all real, but they were what he called them like spoof text, spoof text. Anybody have any kind of reaction at all to that? It's bullshit, yes. Okay, well, when Dingo from West Hollywood says, Mike, when you said you can buy and sell destiny, that was really disgusting.

And Mike's like, yes, yes, it was disgusting. And I have to say, I was being triggered because a lot of the questions were questionable and I was questioning, being questioned by questionable people were questioning me. And I felt like they were trying to attack me and make me look even worse and I didn't like it Uh, do you want to apologize maybe I apologize? I needed as much as you mean those questionable questions, okay, because when you question me the questionable questions It triggers me, okay, so then Niem goes, you know the question with questions. It triggers me, okay? So then Nima goes, you know, this is really, if I were to assess this brand, I would say it's a double edged sword of Paulina and Destiny

friendship, okay? Because it's really great for Paulina and for Destiny to feel close to each other because there's such a strong bond between them. I mean, the brand loyalty is off the charts, but it ultimately undermines the Paulina micro-rel Mike relationship. So what you have here is a problematic marketing The scenario. Okay, thanks And that was Nima explaining so thanks for all cool thanks. Thanks everybody for coming Nima Explaining these people's relationships to them is so like okay Nima. Thanks. Thanks for coming to you So Mike's like well, you know what? Thank you, ma. Thanks. Thanks for coming, T. So, Mike's like, well, you know what?

Because Destiny's going, my penis is bigger than his and he knows and Annie. Mike's like, oh, it probably is. Yeah, and I'm gonna dick slap you with it. Oh, yeah, I'm sure you told. I'm sure Palina told you already. I'm sure Palina told you already about it. Like, okay, now we're into dick fights. Yeah, this is going well. So he's like, well, Mike, do you doubt Destiny's stalker's story? Okay, because you kind of went for it. How do you feel about that? And he goes, listen, whatever happened on Twitter was because I was questioning questionable questions.

I was, I was, I had some questionable questions about some questionable questions that are questioning me, you know, yeah, and so destiny whips out the Kenya more fan the click fan It's like good inserts fanning herself and she's like you said that my stalker wasn't fake storyline by DOOM Yeah, cuz his his tweet said low funny how no one spilled no and then one. So if you read it, you might say funny how number one on the crew knew about this soccer.

Can we see some proof of a restraining order against him? Or is this a spoof soccer? Spoof soccer. By the way, I have to I have to go back to something here because it's been, you know, warming its way through my brain for the past 10 seconds, which is that if Mike were caught 10 times, and now Paulina says, oh, those 10 times that Mike was caught was because those were all spoof texts. Why is Mike like, what point does Mike realize

is being spoofed? Like we had famously during the family karma recap, I got a text from someone being like, hey it's Mandy, this is Amanda, we have our date tonight or something, and I was like, oh my God, Ronnie, this is hilarious, and I wrote back, and then it became very clear that it was like a bot and it was a scam, right?

And these texts, it was a spoof text, and it went, you know, it would happen live on crap ends, but like, it happened to me once, and I know going forward, I'm like, you know, it would happen live on crap ends. But like, it happened to me once, and I know going forward, I'm like, oh, okay, I see how this poof text works because it's a bot. And so I would not get caught nine more times respond engaging with the robot, right?

Well, he's just a flat out, he's just a flat out terrible liar because first he said, oh, it was just that once, he just said it last week in the reunion He goes, no, the only time was that one time that's the only time and so now it's multiple times and now it's 10 times He was being spoof text and then they all happen to come at a time where he's getting caught. Those are the only times He was being spoof text. I mean, he's just so If there are spoof texts, why are you engaging with them each time? I just it doesn't nothing.

You know what I call these questionable questions? Yeah, questionable questions with Mike Schwat. So Mike said, you know, uh, so that's I think go to hell. And he goes, I didn't say that. I didn't say that you did. They just put your text on the screen. You did just say the stalker was fake, right? And he goes, look, I was just trying to get Paulina to leave.

And if that triggered you, I'm sorry. Yeah, but if I asked him out to leave multiple times and he refused to leave, he's like, my most prized position was in there. My most prized position. And he's like, okay, let me raise that. Okay. Let's say, okay, imagine you go and you order something from Hammer Crush Lever and then you bring it to a party and then you need to leave But you've almost forget your Hammer Crush Lumber gift. So what do you do you have to take it? It's your most viable possession, right? I don't okay. Look look. I don't mean possession. Okay. I mean property. Okay. My most prized property was in there That's that's terrible. Okay. No, no, no, no, no, it's a word in properly. Okay. My most prized vagina that I own Okay, that's what I mean. That was in there. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, the automated female experience that I own. I have turned

Palina into an NFT and I now owner is she's on the blockchain. She's on the blockchain and I own her now. The spray-tanned scarecrow in the address that I brought to the party. So Andy goes, maybe you mean the most prized person that you love because all my goodness, dude, you guys are all nuts How am I not? I say possession as a joke and now this wants about to have an aneurysm and you and he come on my god dude You do not say it as a joke That must be a possession

He's one of those people who just says something terrible and then goes, oh my god What are you so woke now? Why does everybody so woke all the time? I'm not possessive. I just refer to her as my most precious possession, okay? So then and then someone who possesses something need to put them on a leash. No, okay? Now for Lena leaves any perimeter of here. She's going to have a buzzing in her butthole, okay? Now that's not called a possession. That's called Taking care of what you own. Okay, thank you. So now it's like so bad that I like that song possession by Sermic Latham. Suddenly I can't like that song anymore, huh? So Andy's just laughing at this point and Russ is like, we're just trying to look out for you

because I don't want the public to think of you that way. Oh my god, who hurt him? That fucked him up like this. Uh, I just, parents come out and are like, it was us. Thank you, everyone. Thank you. So, uh, so then let's, let's move on to Thanksgiving. Hey, uh, MJ, so why does everyone think that MJ's hands are so unclean?

And then there's like laughing because she picks her nose a lot and everything and M.V.S. saying that she she's she was pretty drunk, etc. And he's just like cringing some more. He's like, let me use that possession cringe face and bring it here to M.J. picking your nose and handling everyone's food. Yeah. Hey guess what? Vina is too brokenhearted to come to this reunion. So let's do another role play, Vita and Result talking about their outfit. So they do like a little skit of MJ criticizing Result for wearing shorts to the to the reunion. Yes. And then we go to Paulina.

This is not okay. That was such a funny segment, guys. Paulina, what's the real reason? You don't show up to anything. Come on, Paulina. Jackson, Jackson. Well, I didn't want to sit at a table where I didn't feel what's the rest of the line, Mike.

Where you didn't feel thankful for the people around me. I didn't feel thankful for the people around me to be honest with you. You.'t feel thankful for the people around me to be honest honest with you. You. No, when you say you, you say me. When I say you say me. No, no, but I say you.

Oh my God, I'm love for going. It's Lionel Richie. Okay. Oh my God. Oh my God. So does he's like, I was at that table and on the phone you gave her a shout out and I even asked your man And your man said that you don't like me And then we see Mike in a clip going you said I control her and I don't and I don't let her talk and

Probably was like yeah, well, I didn't say like I didn't like her and Mike's like I don't you know what? I don't remember anything that I said. I was triggered. Yeah, he keeps saying that. It's like, well, I was triggered by something and I was pissed. So, you know, it's understandable. Like, like, everything's fine because Mike was triggered. So he can't be held accountable for anything he said or did.

So typical. He's learning from these people, right? Yeah. Because any time, and especially Reza, because Rezaza does Reza is the worst offender in this reunion Even next to Mike, which is saying something every time Reza is wrong. He's like So Mike has heard the word triggered and now he's gonna use it whenever he's in trouble, but I was triggered. I don't believe in me Believe in me question, but questions Name is like well, you know, I just want to clarify that you said you were thankful for me and Maris

He's talking to Paulina you said you were thankful for me and Maris, he's talking to Paulina, you said you were thankful for me and Maris and not for Destiny so there was a real issue with your brand on that one. Oh, you said you didn't trust Destiny. Yes, you said she was a bitch ass stupid person. Her words not mine. Well, maybe it's because you were drunk, Polina. She's like, oh, well, it wasn't intentional. Like, it wasn't intentional, unintentional, unintentional, or intentional.

But she was the closest to you. Are you seeing that? Yeah, that's what I'm saying. Some does probably never have a thought in her head. I mean, what the hell? Say one thing that someone doesn't have to spoon feed you. I know. Paulina, why were you using Mike's friends

for the reason you stopped coming around when you were the reason you involved them in the first place? Can you follow that question, Paulina? That's a great question. It's a question of a question. It was a question of a question. I'm triggered.

It's a question of a triggerable trigger, okay? I didn't feel safeable trigger. Okay. I Feel safe around them. Okay, I'm Mike. What is it? I didn't feel Safe you didn't say it you felt Mike was triggered. You felt you felt Mike was triggered. I felt it Andy felt Mike was triggered. No, you're getting it all wrong now all wrong Andy felt Mike was tricking. No, you're getting it all wrong now. All wrong. So Gigi's like, oh, so someone's saying they don't want to be involved in it all.

Makes you feel unsafe. You, what you feel unsafe. What, what, how do I make you feel unsafe? Would you the group of love? It was the group, the group, the group of love. It's the group. Trick it. Trick it.

Trick it. Gigi's like screaming and yelling. Yeah, I don't know why she was feeling safe for us. No check it, check it. GG is like screaming and yelling. Yeah, I don't know why she would feel unsafe for us. No idea. No idea. You only find any excuse to explode in her face. So Sandy goes, so was it the group or was it the group and the cameras? Well, he was like a mixture of both, which is bullshit, of course.

You know, to this day, of course, you know, totally. To this day, it's not easy being in front of the cameras, because my passion's really to be behind. I just want to direct, okay? And I would think that they would have handled it differently versus making him feel attacked. She is so full of shit. You don't care about the cameras.

What are you talking about? Why else would you date Mike? Yeah, you literally made an appearance on watch what happens live as a bartender. You're here at the reunion You clearly, I mean look Mike's relationship with anyone Mike's a pig, okay first So I have to preface that but Paulina's ridiculous acting like she didn't come on here to be on TV And then be friend destiny so she could call and throw Mike under the bus to all of his friends Trying to get his friends to all side with Paulina and still keep her on the show without Mike. I mean, it's such a clear move what she was trying to do.

It blew up in her face and now to stay on the show, she has to be with Mike. And the reason she didn't show up, his shoes Mike didn't fuck and let her. I mean, give me a break. How is this so hard to follow? It's not. It's not. It's so hard to follow. It's not. It's not. Commissars, here comes one right now. Raising kids can be one of the greatest rewards of a parent's life.

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listen to, I love my kid, but wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen ad-free on the Amazon music or Wondery app. Sandy says, Paulina, so why did you call Destiny in the Redwoods? I mean, this was just a few weeks after you said you couldn't trust my friends. Andy, I'm sorry, I couldn't hear the question

because, oh, hilarious. What a hilarious question. So funny, hilarious, hilarious, hilarious, hilarious. So then Paulina goes,'t never said that to her I mean when I when I mean like the friends. I mean like the group like I've always had that trust and bond with her So now Pauline is saying that she doesn't trust the group, but she trust destiny and that's why she called destiny At the exact moment when destiny was with the whole group at the exact moment when Desi knew was with the whole group right on the camera right so probably and then we see the clip of her going as I'm sure you can guys Mike asked me not to be in touch

with anybody or call anybody back but let me just say history has a repeat of that song and at this point I have freak on my end and the when I said history is repeating itself, I was just making a comment about the situation in the world. It's just a general comment about humans and society has nothing to do with my experience. So Andy's like, so you got caught again is basically what happened. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no You have two phones you have landmines. They're all gonna use spoof text and goes oh because look look And he's pouring it everybody like they're all spoof texting him now Global conspiracy This is a huge conspiracy and it doesn't like one of these always happened to yeah And and because well, why don't you just change your number? He's like no, no, but it doesn't matter because they're texting

They're texting he they text me the text Shervin. Okay, Shervin, too. He they're texting. They're texting. They text me. They text Shervin, okay? Shervin too. He's a victim. We're all victims here, okay? And it doesn't matter about the phone number. The spoof's they find you. The spoof's find you. Oh my, dude.

Yeah. They're texting Shervin. They're texting Nima. They're writing Nima. Nima's like, mm-hmm. I'm gonna nod. Like, just keep going. You just see Nima's teeth nod.

And probably I'm just like, yeah. Like, one of the text messages that I got rolling out. Son, I'm like, Mike was like, no, look. And so I did. And Nima got the exact same message. And son, I am triggered. Spoof text life vagina. Oh, but trigger trigger. So I mean, it was pretty clear that everybody's just being spoofed, taxed. Yeah, cause like Mike and Nima both got the same spoof text and talking about how like this bitch is like

waiting at a restaurant, you know, for her and her name is Ope Atabala. You got a text from OpenTable saying, you have a table ready for you? Yeah, this bitch doesn't leave us alone So does he's like, but that's such a setup. I mean if I'm a guy I'm like taking notes on this and he's like, but does everyone believe that there's food messages? Oh, no, no, no Andy come on. No, they think that I'm doing this and that I'm just sending it to myself and

I'm doing this and then I'm just sending it to myself. And CG is like, yeah, well, Residus think that. Residus is like, well, I think that he is doing it to say, look, there's all this weird shit going on with everyone. It's not just me. See, because what Residus is saying is that there's 10 real messages, but if you make 20 fake ones, and all 30 become fake. So now we're at the point where now we

have a meta conspiracy theory about the spoof messages, which we all agree the spoof messages probably don't exist in the first place. But actually, I think Reza's logic pans out. I can actually see someone who is in, like, who is back themselves in this ridiculous position, doing this to negate all their real messages, and that way they can call them all spoof messages. This is the way we live in now, guys. And nobody falls for it. They all know that it's Mike doing it because nobody brought it up at the reunion. So Paulina had to, you know, because nobody was like, yeah, and he were all getting these.

Yeah, no one did. No one like, like, rushed to indicate him. I think that I think that he was obviously really texting people who was texting with people all over the place. He got caught. He got in trouble. Paulina texted everybody, Resa joked around and sent like a joke spoof text maybe like once. And then Mike is now sending everyone spoof texts trying to get everybody on his page. I mean, this shows so crazy. I just don't understand. It's like an agatha Christie thing where everybody's guilty. You know, it's like you all did it.

It's so crazy that you all did it. I know. I think each spoof text have their own fingerprints on it. Spoiler, I just need someone from Verizon to get in here and clear the saw up because I need to get to the bottom of what I still don't really, how does one send up spoof text?

I guess you get a whole other phone is that what it is you go to No, there's apps that you can use Wow, and you can say you can put in the caller ID for any number that you want to show up on the caller ID So that's how people are sending each other all these fake messages and also they're using WhatsApp So I guess you can go change your name in WhatsApp or whatever Which I don't know that on WhatsApp as well. Yeah, I don't know what's up. It's all over.

Spoof, spoof, spoof, spoof, spoof, spoof, spoof, spoof, so then. Emek's like in that. He's like, yeah, but he's saying that you know, you lie about 10, but then one is real, but now you're making all of them look fake or whatever you just said. And my goes, oh, oh goes oh okay now I get it.

Such a fucking wife. So my auntie goes so Mike you talked about being addicted to attention so are you getting any help for that? He goes oh yes. I'm talking to a rabbi. Yes. I'm. How about I do this.

I bought a CD by Mattas Yahoo. I've listened to it a lot. So it's helping. So, uh, and you're like, well, you two are in a great place, but we're engaged. So therefore, we get a great place. That's how it works. Okay. Share your fingers to bed.

And I'm a finger. No, you're ring finger. Not your thumb. Ow. Bolly, you know, is there anything you want to clear up or reject into your face before really? Would you like to check World of Doma and to your face before we leave? Check.

I went really a lot of a relationship with Destiny because of Destiny. I am a misdeal and I am home and I am forgetting everyone involved that was wrong and also remember say the part about you want to have everyone over to show everyone how happy we are not without a problem also I went like in my every one clover to Clover to call over over over over over over over Okay, no, I'm not over you say you say the word over. I'm not saying you're leaving me. Oh my god You fucking China you just say you want people over not we're not over no Palina, why are you calling me? I'm right here

I'm done with my key G that I'm in. Oh my God. You're very happy, Paulina. Paulina, you're a happy person. You're a happy, you're a good relationship. Oh, sorry, Destiny. We're in a good relationship now. So Destiny's like, um, but since you're here,

I have to make it clear. I really hope that when you see the episodes, you remind yourself when you want to be rude to me, that I said nothing to him or her or her or him, nothing, but you still want to keep coming for my jugular and I'm keeping your deep, deep, deep secret that I'm not telling anybody. That is a lie, okay? She loves her Mercedes. No, not Jaguar, Jagular. And he was like, but when you consistently come to the group and allude to knowing something, I mean, that's like triggers him. I said, but I didn't say it

because I could have the last reunion. Remember when I was like, you better not come from me, buddy, because I can use this against you. And he's like, yeah, but that's what I mean. I mean, if you're gonna say it, say it, like saying nothing or say everything. Mike's like, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, why don't you just stop now? Just stop, just stop, bro, bro. Mike's just not, he's mean, it's like, just say it. Mike's like, no, no. So Empty goes, God, please just give it to us.

And it's like, what's that about, huh? Because I can't let today end and be like the way it is, the reza and be the way with YouTube I mean today's such a huge important thing and Mike now Mike does this thing because we're why why are we doing this Bush it then huh we should just move why are we doing this huh huh? He goes well Paulina before you leave do you want to hug it out with destiny? I want a long too. She's the only one I want to hug I would all I'm to she the only one I want to hug

Shut up Paulina like you're the one who started all of this Paulina Okay, you started this against your own boyfriend and you came against the whole group like this is all your fault Yeah, so Paulina's like yeah, she's kind of rude to everybody on her way out. She's still trying to get her Third season, I guess yeah, then Andy's like, well, I mean, thanks for being here and just spelling the myth that Mike won't let you speak. He's like, okay, go back to the crate, get him. Cool. Okay, we got a charging station for you back there. Okay, just plug yourself in.

Okay, great. So, so now then they switch couches and everything. And then I was like, Oh, I'm sitting next to MJ now. This is crazy. Hey, I didn't mean to assault that moment, but I couldn't not keep it real. You know, that's sort of my brand, dude, bro. So then, um, they're just kind of messing around before we go back on camera. MJ is doing good lipstick and Mike, you know, fills up the water bottle and Pauline is crating, comes back out and Gigi's bending over the couch smoking her weed, you know, and he was like, Oh, Gigi, it's so hot.

You're giving me Madonna sex vibes right now. Wow. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Major, major sex vibes, Goldenness. Uh, she's like, please go away. It's anything. She does that thing where she's like, well, I, major sex vibes, Goldenness. She's like, please go away. She does that thing where she's like, well, I am like a virgin.

It's been three years. Ha ha ha! So she does that big, huge open mouth laughing. And whenever she does that, she kind of looks like an old toothless method. So she's got something more charming. She does something where she kind of like covers her teeth with her lips. So it looks like she's toothless.

Old toothless mouth out. It's not where I thought that was going to go, but I support it. All right. While some of our shots are in relationships, the rest are still looking for their match or matches plural, never going to happen because all your behaviors documents and on television Okay, GG Talk to me about polygamy. Do you even know what it means? Yes, it means having a love of shapes Oh polyamory

I guess polyamory could lead to polygamy Tell me about polyamory and poly polygamy and cow me about Blamry and Bolly, it believed me and Cal Poly. Have you ever been to that college? Yeah. If you have a poly, you should get a taken out because those could be bad. I'm just gonna say that. If you're a poly, do you want a cracker?

Bollyanna, was she a good person? Or was she really a bitch who deserves what she got in the end? She's taking away. You just basically like, well, I haven't actually tried this yet, but it's something I'm really, really interested in. And it's like, so how do you know that's what you want? And she says that basically when she was married to Shalom,

she was like, there was one time when I woke up, oh, sorry, this was a, you were married in the four months, right? Yes. Anyway, I woke up one time and I told him if I'm not around, Sorry, this is a you were married in the four months, right? Yes anyway I woke up one time and I told him if I'm not around and you want to mess around with a girl I'm okay with that and he didn't like that Yeah, cuz he thought I was fucking around, you know

Okay, so a couple things first of all why have we had to listen to your polyamory bullshit all year long when you haven't even done it to listen to your polyamory bullshit all year long when you haven't even done it. Yeah. Like, give me a break. Like, I want ice cream right now. Am I going to talk about, well, that's probably a bad example. Well, because you say we'll talk about it for an entire hour. But still, don't make your story in mind. You didn't even do anything.

Yeah. It's very odd. It's like me talking about the importance of joining a professional football team. And then at the And then the season, it's like, Oh, so Ben, so what, what was it like for you when you were on a football team? Oh, I've never done that. Yeah, I just think it's important to do. And she says that she just hasn't tried it because of COVID really because you had a gigantic, like jungle themed party with the hundred people. Yes. I'm past your bait. I mean, give me a break with this. So the second thing is when he's like,

when she says, well, when I was made a Shalom Andy, they popped up one of those ads under her, and it was huge. And it said, threat thwarting Wi-Fi's. And I just thought it was so funny, because it's like Shalom's big face. And it's like threat thwarting. Oh, you need that first spoof messages, you know? So you know, wording is a threat, but you know what? I told her to spoof words. No, Mike, it's for Wi-Fi bots. Oh, never mind. I didn't say that. Nothing ever happened. It's question, blue questions. So then, um, and you're like, so do you ever hear from Shalom? Just no comments. I noticed that you're still wearing his ring. So the answer is he's probably calling every day to be like give me back that ring. I spent $10,000 not give me back that ring.

Yeah. So he then we talk about the size of Nemus penis. Is it really big or is it small? Because you said it was small and then he came on watch what happens live and he said that whenever Gigi calls someone a small dick it's because she's like they're interested in her and she doesn't like that so she calls them small dick yeah and she's like she's like I'm I'm pushing 40 and I've been there done that I've had all types of dual and guess well, huh, well, you know what, she touched my dick in Hawaii and said, dude, bro, I'm pleasantly surprised.

At which point I said, you know what's pleasantly surprising? You know that you're like giving me sex-couldn vibes right now, bro, dude. Like, it's hot. Like, I want to put my penis that's of a surprising size and growth into your vagina, because I'm a bro, bro. And she's like, well, you know, it's of a surprising size and growth into your vagina because I'm a bro bro. And she's like, well, you know, it's like a, I thought it would be a carrot. And Mike's like, what, what is it like a cucumber? She was, yeah, a pear tree cucumber, not an English one.

She just earned that mouth laugh. Yeah. And it's like, Neema's like, yeah, he's like, I'm even above this. And I'm Eddie Gullin. Okay. And Neema's like, a little lady, you know, I've been dating lots of girls, tons of girls, so many girls, so many vaginas. And you know what, you go, girls share different, like they're just different, you know?

And I just, like, I met someone in the drinking. I will say that, Andy. I met someone in the drinking. And Russ is like, go, so, hey, hey, hey, he loves this song. Nima and Garza sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G. Oh, yeah, that's really my brand, actually. That's actually a proposed for our first date. We go to a tree.

So we actually see a clip from what happens live. Rats said that she likes Nima, follows Nima, and thinks that Nima's hot. And then we get into this segment where they talk about how Nima is like a lady's man with bravo liberties and they start talking like who, which bravo liberties are into Nima and it's like first of all, Gina comes up first, which I did not know about a Gina and Nima crossover. And then they're like, oh, and the one with the short hair from Summer House, you know,

the one, she said she could get Nima an outfit that cost $45 less. You know that one. She made Nima like and subscribe. She made Nima like and subscribe her videos. What was her name? Oh, gosh. So yeah, they got paid, they got paid, he got paid jewels, she knows. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, Nima is really just that guy at the office who's just banging anybody who feels sad at Christmas. Yeah. He's just the right place, the right time. Yeah. He knows where to be. Yeah. So he's just like low effort water cooler bang. You know, they're like, well, that guy's okay. I mean, at least he's got clean teeth. I can see him from here. So all right. Let's fry it out, buddy. He's the Hershey bar.

He's the, you went to the vending machine to get a kickcat and there's no kickcat. So you're like, I'll have a Twix, but there's no Twix. There's not even Snickers. So then you wind up, not in the Hershey bar. He's like the three Musketeers, right? No, he's like the Sour Patch Kids. He's basically what you just settle for in the in the mending machine

Totally, you know, it's like the almond joy. What's face it? Yeah, and you're like it's it's not so bad actually You're like actually why don't I have this almond joy more, but you're never gonna go to it first Yeah, I mean like one my new girl she's friend Chandy. I'm like. I'd love to bring her to the group. Okay. Oh really? Is she in Canada? She fresh Canadian Girlfriend in Canada. So rest is like, well, I don't say this much Adam. It's great. Andy Adam is doing great Well, we didn't see him that much you didn't and that was purposeful He's not around because he has a new job and the same way Palina feels about this group Adam feels the same way. Oh really? Then why were you the whole season saying Paulina was trash for not coming around the group

and Mike wasn't like. Yeah. Yeah. Well, actually the real reason is because he had a terrible beard and he wouldn't shave it off so I just made him stay at home. I didn't want him to have to come to parties when he would also have to bring all the rats that were living inside of his facial hair and I get sick of Adam being invited to party is only so that way he could sweep up what people were dropping on the floor with his beard.

So Andy's like Sir Resa, do you still want a kid? Hold on one second. I never want a kid. Never ever ever, ever, ever, ever. Uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, but you know sometimes you learn things about yourself and they tell me I do things they don't like about me and they have parents that I don't want to cry any I don't want to cry any Can I take a break? I don't want to keep crying while I'm talking

I just want to dab my eyes A bitch got to dab his eyes A bitch lost 40 tears and I don't want to keep crying I'm sorry Ahhhh But while I step away please remember that was all your comments about me that caused me to lose faith in parenthood.

Thank you. Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah. That's what he did. He's like, yeah, you know, because my parents, they were so terrible. And now, you know, these people don't believe in me. And, and, and, and, and. He starts going off on this. They've all made him feel like such a terrible person.

He doesn't want to do that to a child. First of all, you are a terrible person. Right. First of all, you like one. Okay. First of all, right on the money, you're totally fucking Adam over, which called that one years ago with his control. That's like, I don't want a baby, you know, but well, maybe I'll have a baby. If you do X, Y, and Z, Adam, we can have a baby if you do this, this, and this, my way. So Adam does it. And then he's like, well, but if we're going to have a baby, it's going to be a surrogate

baby. So we're going to do it my way. Then he goes through all of that. And now you don't want one and you're going to blame MJ and everybody for you not doing it. You never wanted a baby. And the stretch, you just strung that poor Adam along this whole fucking time. No, no, no, he didn't drink poor Adam along.

Like this was obvious to any single person who watched the show. This is Adam's own fault at this point, right? Like Adam wanted a baby. It was obvious that Resa was never ever going to have a baby. And Adam, you know, like he should have seen the writing on the wall, but instead he saw the chevron on the wall instead. And it's hard to see the writing when they're chevron. But I know, I mean, but you're right.

It sucks for Adam in that he did fall for it, right? Like he fell for it. And but at the same time, this is probably for the best for humanity because Reza is there is truth to this that Resa will be passing on some very toxic behaviors to a child and we probably need to stop the cycle, but it is funny because it does feel like he's ultimately just kind of like gilting his cast mates for it and maybe even the audience. And it's probably wanting a moment where everyone says, no, no, no, you'd be great, you'd be great. Also, Bravo's like the only place on Earth

that people are like, wow, you're 50, you should have a baby. Why not? You're 50, let's do it, it's gonna be fun. Your twilight years are gonna be spent, you know, going to high school football games and shit. Like, can I have a ear with that? What am I saying?

You can't do it. It's just Bravo's the only place it's encouraged. Yeah. Do live the great idea. I wanted to have a baby, but I don't want a child being raised in fear that the cacti in the backyard may be destroyed by an evil man someday. I don't want a child who lives in fear of a fight is hitting him in the head while he's trying to eat those Cheerios!

I don't want them to think that he can just spend $800 on a zero-scape and have it destroyed by an emotional man. Oh god, and then M.J. and G.G. jumping, of course. Well, I hope he has a change of heart because life takes on a new meaning when you bring life into it. Yeah, I'm gonna be the best example for my kid, Andy, because like, Resa, you've changed so much in the last two years.

Like you're meant for it. He has not changed at all. I don't know what the fuck everybody's talking about. And they always not meant for it. And guess what else? Everybody does not need to have a kid to be a good person. So both of you shut up with that. They're like, oh my God, it changes you.

You don't realize what being a good person is until you've had a baby. Let's not use children as band-aids for your personality. Okay, let's not be like, well, I have some toxic behaviors that I picked up from my childhood, but if I have a baby, I bet I have some toxic behaviors that I picked up from, you know, my childhood. But if I have a baby, I bet I'm going to fix it all. Yeah.

Sometimes I think that people who have babies are like, everybody has to do it. So I don't feel so alone over here. You know, they're like, this sucks. You should do it too. It's like this tape, you know, that old, like, Ellen joke where she's like, wow, this tastes like crap. Here you should try it. Yes.

I was at a pizza place with my family yesterday. And we're sitting there. And there is this couple with seven children, okay? Seven. Seven? And they were so cute, cute couple, the cutest kids, of course, running everywhere, throwing pizza all over the damn place.

And at one point, the dad looked over, and he just looked like help. Yeah. Yeah. He looked just so jealous that we didn't have kids everywhere. It's like, please, please help me. I know. I mean, talk to him. He would have said, you should have kids. You'd love it. That's great. Always, always. And I say that as gay men, one of

the, one of the privileges of big gay men is that we can, instead of having kids, we can have brunch and Spontaneous plans and so I say that Reza can lean into that of course that goes for everyone who doesn't have kids But I think we're gay There are a lot of gay parents, but I feel like there's more of a societal expectation on straight couples than there is on gay couples Even though it's totally, you know, becoming more normal. I'm just saying, like enjoy that you have no kids. There's a lot of upside too. So, does Adam want kids?

Well, our relationship is in a good place and I would hate myself if I ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Well hey, Jimmy and I are both lunatics and we did it alone. All right, we'll stop talking about that. Let's go back to the welcoming party. It seems like you got enjoyment telling Destiny what Vita said about her flat butt. Okay. Why'd you lose up with that, Raza? He's like, because I am so sick of M.J. not shutting her mother down. And it's like, you love shutting her down when she's coming for you, but you thrive when she's coming for other people.

And so Andy goes, well, then why did you repeat it? Like she actually was trying to shut it down. And and destiny's like, yeah, if he, well, if he had not repeated it, I wouldn't have known until it aired. It's like, so what's the difference? Yeah, so who cares? So, like, are you a better person for knowing someone's mom was brewed? Who cares?

So, stop standing up for this mom stir. In one, and one timeline, you find out at the party, and then you have a shitty party, and then you also are angry at Vita. In another timeline, you enjoy the party, and then find out later and are angry at Vita So do you want to enjoy a party or not? Yeah, and he's like, yeah, but Retha you weresy and MJ goes, well that's absolute bullshit.

You hurt my mom, you've hurt her so much. And you've done nothing, you're an angel. Yeah, I've destroyed our relationship. You're perfect, but I'm compulsive. I'm a loosive. And she's like, my mom watched that. And he's like, but I'm the worst person. You know, I bring out a list for MJ.

Does someone have a scroll for Maristra Read from? I feel like you came here with an agenda to make me look bad and I don't like it. So, which is like, I love that the agenda is just saying things that Ressa did. I know. You're weird, don't you? Well, Destiny, were you more bothered by what Vita said just saying things that Ressa did. I know. You were doing it.

Well, Destiny, were you more bothered by what Vita said or how gleeful Ressa was? I hit it all of it. And her husband talking about my looks, and then it's like Tommy, be like, she looks like the cow from Sesame Street. Ah! Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha is like, well, I told Tommy I'm not supportive of him criticizing your looks or and I didn't like my mother doing it either. Well, where's Tommy's apology destiny for all that shit that you helped start last year. You know, Destiny got away scot free with all of that stuff.

So Andy's like, well, what's good seeing your mom right? And he's like, oh, I wrote so much about my mother's to Mocha's release. What are you doing? You did not write shit. Okay. You probably had somebody else leave you a long ass voice message for that lady to transcribe. Get over yourself. Christopher Robin acting like he sat there all day writing for years and years. And then Resa says that his dad, oh, this is sort of sad. This is like legitimate, I mean, sad that his dad is not verbal now.

So he can't, like, he sees pictures of Nima with his dad and how they patch things up. And, you know, he thought it was nice that they were able to get to a better place before it was too late. And he's like, yeah, hey, Mike, you were a voice of reason last year, which is crazy that you were a smooth voice. No, this is a good thing. Oh, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry. Yes, were a voice of reason last year, which is crazy that you were a spoof voice. No, this is a good thing Oh, sorry, sorry, sorry. Yes. Yes, voice of reason. Yes, Mike. Did you you know

Mike last season Do you think that the plugs made you Smart or do you think the plugs made you meaner this year because last night you were much smarter and you were bald Okay, hey, anybody ever forget the mic was bald? Let's roll the clip. Spoof hair. So. Then I got lost.

Spoof hair. Yeah. So Mike is basically like, I just wanted, you know, I was a voice of reason. Thank you very much. And I just wanted Resa to reciprocate what I gave to Resa last year, which was a lot of condescending information. Yeah. So basically last year, Resa's boyfriend was caught in some

naked jingles candle, which you brought up on camera with destiny to get back at Resa for all of his past shit. And then you pretended to be nice to Resa to get him through it. How is that really different than any of this? Except, I mean, Resa's doing exactly what you did. He brought up your shit or he helped bring it up on national TV. And then he pretended to be nice to you about it later. It's a difference. But you know what? You know what, Ronnie? You know what Andy? You know what America?

Today, now here I look at him and I go, fuck. I miss this guy and his puff texting. I miss him. Who else would wear shorts and a suit and pull it off? Like what? People of permuta? I don't think so. This is what he does. He amuses me, he enlightens me, and he makes me feel fulfilled.

He's the brother. I always want it. Is he giving some sort of like lifetime achievement award to Helen Mirren? What is this speech? You know, he's like, he's like, but you're not he's the part that I wish I had but we don't handle it The way we should instead we go to social media and the press and get people involved and I'm like fuck this guy He's betraying me that my trust but right now standing before you I love you and I will always love you I love you too. I love you so much because one thing I know about Mike is when we make mistakes, we do not like when the other one points it out but we're like brothers.

And I have to tell you one of the most beautiful parts today is seeing the ring on Paulina's finger. So for him being able to turn around the mess I got on that television. I have never spec'd for that. You know, to like come to the table and admit that in that speech. I'm so proud. I'm so proud. I'm so proud.

I'm so proud. Also, let's also point out that Mike runs to the press when there's a problem. I love you. I love you. I love you. Worst, funniest, most people on TV. These people are just the lowest of the low. And I love them.

Please don't recast. You know what? You didn't do it on my time frame. And I was mad at you, but I love you. I'm really sorry. I'm really sorry. I'm really sorry. I wish I could only give a fraction of this love to baby shums.

Ah. So then we got a commercial and we come back and MJ is telling Reza before they roll camera. She's like, you know, like, come on, Reza, like we go way back, you know? And it's not that I need you to validate my feelings. It's just like, I need to at least be able to say my feelings.

He's like, but you always do and I support that. So, and he's like, well, after a rough season, MJ is back and her marriage on the other end has become significantly less spicy. So what's going on with you two? How much time am I at, are you bonin'? Are you bonin'? Tell me everything.

I want details. And she's like, no. And so then she talks about mom, duty and all of that stuff. And then Andy asks, let's let Resa cry some more. He's like, oh, there are any qualities of baby shams that you see or that you see your father in and rest of the like, he talks about how great daddy shams was. And then we get to, you you know what's one thing you miss about Reset that you haven't gotten back and she's like well and it's like day to

day. It's like calling or like what's holding me back is I want to make sure we're like burning it authentically and I think it's a problem between my husband and him you know because the jail time my husband did, you know That's hard to walk back. It's hard to walk back The jail time my husband did on account of the assault he committed On the vandalism he committed. That was really it was really hard for him to walk back the jail time on The vandalism he committed so let's so check this this is so fucking reservoir right so what's the status of the restraining order?

Oh, well she said Tommy doesn't give a shit. You know what I paid my attorney. I wrote the card He ripped up the card. You know she never reached out to say thank you for the card I mean I was just disappointed. I thought we'd be in a different place like I'm'm trying. And I thought maybe if I drop it, then maybe some good will come of it. But so he still hasn't dropped it. He hasn't dropped it. He still has not dropped it. This fucking guy.

And then sitting here crying like he's such a victim. Yeah, it's like, because he's like, oh well, Tommy said he doesn't care. I'm like, yeah, he says that. But I'm sure if you dropped it, that's the whole point. Like, Resa was like, I'm gonna send a card to show, I have not, this is the most sincere thing, right? Because I know I've got nothing,

like there's no shot this will work, but I'm gonna send it anyway, which shows the sincerity. And yet he won't actually do that with the restraining order, which is the same thing. Like I know he says he doesn't care, but I'm gonna do it anyway to show something, right? So he is fully full of bullshit. And he goes, can I say something that's very honest?

And by honest, I mean, I feel like I do not want a relationship with Tommy. Okay. I'm doing the restraining order. And by saying, I'm doing the restraining order, I'm actually not doing the restraining order because I haven't. I'm doing the restraining order as a favor to MJ because she made it crystal clear that she feels isolated and alienated as a result of it. Ah, no. You're recording this, right? Yes, I am. Thank God because I did not press record. Oh my God. Could you imagine?

I can't imagine. Could you imagine? In the out 50 minutes of these voices just going out into nowhere. Could you imagine? Thank God for you, the wind beneath my wings. Oh God. He's got me as far as I didn't press record. If I had known that that would have made a difference, I would have pressed record the

entire time. Oh God. Okay. So MJ's like, well, so MJ is like, well, first rest is like, yeah, it's clear that he's not looking for a relationship between me, Destiny or GG, you know, but that was a gesture of goodwill. Like, but you haven't done it, Reza, you know?

And MJ is like, well, I see the show and Soda's Tommy and he sees, you know, and they're like, so what did he see that so bad? And she's like, well, like he saw, like you guys liking, like making fun of me, dying and stuff. And he's like, that was years ago. Nothing has happened this year. Yeah, I didn't, what was that about by the way?

I don't seem to, I don't know what that is. She's bringing up the stuff from last season where, um, oh, about the, they said she's in the hospital dying. And he's like, whatever, she's not, has she's in the hospital dying and he's like, whatever, she's not, has she's not dying so bad that she can't start shit in my life. Right. So Andy is like, uh, what would it take for Tommy to say, Reza can meet Shams? She's like, well, Tommy wants to see Reza and anger management and also maybe season tickets to the meds. Cause they're a way we can broker a meeting with Darryl Strawberry or Dawkins. Is that possible or no?

Yeah. And she's like, well, Tommy's an anger management. And Gigi goes, yeah, because it was court ordered. I mean, did he finish when the court order was finished or did he like soak up because he actually cared because it was the court order. That's the reason he went. And MJ is like, he's really been breaking on himself. Or did he like soak up because he actually cared because it was a court order that's the reason he went and M.J. It's like he's really been working on himself like he's got the gratitude of arms going off and we get the clip of thing

All right, I'm grateful for boobies Farts because of funny and Tepa wear cuz like what the fuck out of that? They said I'm grateful for chase stadium. They tore that down What the fuck There's a microwave to the screen door So I've resa and gg seen that MJ has grown so resa says Well, you know, I haven't spent much time with MJ and I would love to tell you that I can share lots of stuff with you

But unfortunately I can't and gg's's like, yeah, same with me. And she goes, you know, it's interesting to me that you're saying funny stuff behind my back to Reza. And of course, so Reza's running right to Gigi going, and he's talking shit about you. That's exactly right. And there was some situation where they ran into each other to birthday party and it was weird. And they're, Gigi's just sort of talking about, I guess MJ was, I guess it called Resa ringleader or Gigi ringleader. Either way, Gigi's not- She said, well, you couldn't do that when your ringleader was there, which was Resa.

And so she's like, we're trying to take steps forward, but then MJ keeps talking shit about us, which I know because Resa and I talk shit about MJ and that's when we compare notes. Yeah, pretty much. And MJ goes, well, I harper resentment. So GG goes, Maris, the reason why you're not my friend and I will never and will never be my friend is because you lie. You have never been there for me. What is MJ have to be there for GG for? Right? Like what, like the going to a class that's learning on X about polyamory,

I don't know, like I mean, there were, I feel like GG, I feel like MJ did show up for like the big things, like the, like the hospitalizations, et cetera. Well, GG, I mean MJ has screwed GG over plenty, but GG, you know, Reza has been the worst, and GG's fine with Reza now, you know, but she's more scared of Reza, so she like holds Reza closer or something, and Gigi's fine with Reza now, you know, but she's more scared of Reza

so she like holds Reza closer or something and she won't forgive MJ and M.D.M. and like Gigi nobody really likes Gigi anyway they just wait around to use Gigi as a weapon against each other. Why is Gigi so changed is sitting here screaming like you're the reason I'm not your friend man. Oh yeah totally different, Jeans. Juju's like, you'll never be my friend because you lie. When there was an entire season where Juju made up a lie that Reza had a sex tape and

like a men's spa. So I don't know. Yes. Um, yep. So who here thinks Reza should be allowed to meet baby shams some of them raise their hands I also didn't write down who but some of them do only the only one who didn't was Mike Mike yeah, yeah So MJ is like well when Reza and I are close There will be meaning and having him play a role in my son's life, which is also like a line of bullshit because

You know, I've met a lot of babies who I have no significant role in my son's life, which is also like a line of bullshit because, you know, I've met a lot of babies who I have no significant role in their lives. And like that has nothing to do with anything, right? Like, if anything, you want, you're like, please, I hold my baby so I can find the bathroom, right? Yeah, I don't care who you are. I think she's saying like, if we're actually friends, spending time together and we mean something to each other, it'll come natural to meet the baby. But right now, it's like, if we're actually friends and spending time together and we mean something to each other,

it'll come natural to meet the baby. But right now, it's like, what the hell? And then Andy says, does it cause the strain in your marriage? And she's like, it causes a strain in my heart and be gay. So then Reza goes into his full, his full victim monologue of, you know, like the way that she talks, that I'm so bad, it makes me want to do nothing because nothing is safe. And like we've taken a thousand steps back because it about reading my head. I know she's having conversations where I'm the bad person,

and it makes me want to avoid her like the playing. And it's been the happiest time in my life, not to deal with the emotional burden. The emotional burden of being called out for shit that you did. The emotional burden of you sitting in the repercussions of yelling at a crowded party that MJ had 10 abortions. Is that what is that what he's talking about? And he's like, yeah, think the guilt of it. Yes, exactly So Reza's like you guys feel like I have to be an anger management and I love you But I'm going to drop the restraint and I'm going to drop the restraining order for your husband the way I dropped 40 pounds

Bitch lost 40 pounds But I'm not going to anger management, okay, I'm not getting I'm not going to stop management, okay? I'm not going to stop get it, get it, okay? I'm going to hang out with you. I'm not going to see your kid. I love you. I'm going to do it so we can have peace. And she's like, but don't you see that it hurts me to watch you form all these other relationships without me? And he's like, what do I do everything for you? Stop punishing me. I've been punished

so much and now I need anger management. Oh my God, you've not been punished. You're still refusing to, you're basically blocking Tommy from being on this show and coming on camera. And you know that you're doing it. And so why, why the fuck would Tommy like you? Yeah, you're taking away his job. Like you're, you're the one making it difficult. Come on. So Mike, Mike is like, you know what? We have to leave Christmas gifts out of it. Like what? Oh, significant others out of it. Okay. Work out their friendships. And she can, you know, work on your friendships and she can't control Tommy or Vida and you can't control Adam as evidenced by that terrible

beard. So just focus on you two, okay? Now hold on, let me look at my cell phone to check on the camera in polynesia crate. Oh look, she just rolled over. God, that's cute. Do you know that by the way, I just got like a spoof phone call from... It was a number from Ontario, California, and it was the number was V eight. First of all, it starts with the first of all starts with V eight. Okay. I'm not getting a phone call from a Canon V8.

All right. And it has literally 13 numbers on it. It's like, this is a phone call from Mike Schuhead. Oh, Michael Schuhead. So they said this is ended 20 times. This is another one where they keep having ending segments. And then let's talk about forgiveness. So then my ghost or all that and Andy goes, good advice.

And Gigi goes, I think that, you know, what's waiting them down is their spouses. Yes, Gigi, that's already been said. But thanks. Well, we're shooting this tonight and we're walking out of here and the cameras are gonna be down for a while and then this is the true test. It will either sink or swim. It's gonna swim. It will swim.

And I'm just like, first turn, and she's like crying. And so he's like, All right, we're gonna focus on the present and see where this goes because I'm just really tired. I want to get out of here. So we're gonna toast and we couldn't think of anything so we got you guys a out of here. So we're going to toast and we couldn't think of anything. So we got you guys a bunch of pies. So here have a pie. They all just got individual pies. And then they're like, okay, time to do a toast. He's like, does anyone know a toast? And they are like, Salamati. I'm like, Andy, you've been doing these reunions for like eight or nine years. You don't know the toast yet. I know the toast. I know the toast now. So then we think it's over and Gigi's taking sexy pictures

on sad and res, so. Oh wait, by the way, you forgot the most important part. For the past like year to years, the end of the reunion shot has become like food, right? Because they don't just do shots anymore. And so now as a result of that, we get the post shot and Cohen-Yelp review. We're just,

this is a good pie. This is not here pretty good. That's pretty good. He does it now after every piece of me's like, hey, this brown is pretty good. Hey, this gasoline is pretty good. It's good pie. Oh, go, this is great.

So then we got a resist dressing room. And you know, MJ is like, I don't want it to end like this. And he's like, OK, we'll thank you for coming because I would love to go into different direction. Maybe we should communicate. OK, great. I'll do everything. It's going to be great. We're going to be in touch, Marys.

Yeah, she's like, I just don't want to end with like a thousand steps back. I guess I was so focused on trying to heal the group because that's what I am, a healer, that I lost sight of trying to heal me and you. And then we come here and I realized all the progress we made, it's so easily lost. So we have to work on it.

So I am going to tell myself, Reza, stop trying to heal the group and bring people together and being such a wonderful person and devote all your energy to MJ who is truly a lost cause, but you have to do what you have to do. Thank you for coming by. Please get after my dressing room now. I don't want to take any more steps back because it doesn't show up on my fitbit. Okay. Pretty much. Oh gosh. Well, that brings us to the end of the shars of sunset season number season nine. Something like that. Wow. Season nine in the game. Everybody. Yeah. It was a good one. I really actually really enjoyed the season quite a bit. Even if like the last few episodes were a little, a little in the woods, felt a little

extraneous. I was cracking up all season long and I was in it. Yeah, great season guys. Well, that brings us to the end of that. So we will be changing it up a little bit in the next couple of weeks with our schedule. We'll let you know once we figure out what we're gonna do. But for now go over to Patreon for the bonuses, the videos and all that good stuff and we will talk to you guys later. Bye everyone. Bye.

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