Watch What Crappens - Southern Charm: Charlotte Hornets' Nest

Episode Date: July 23, 2022

This week on Southern Charm, Venita tries to reason with Olivia — which doesn't work out so well — and the guys head up to Charlotte. Taylor should have nothing to worry about. Nothing at all!Don't just listen to the episode; watch it too! Crappens on Demand here: https://www.patreon.com/posts/69441543See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hey, Prime members, you can listen to Watch What Crapins Add Free on Amazon Music. Download the app today. Get ready for a double load of Queen of Hearts. It's me, Jujubee, and I return to guide sexy singles through some ronchy blind dates. Cameras off. Voice only. Launching during pride. Queen of Hearts takes Miami by storm, with Daeders' Cuppe from Tampa Bayes, Just Chas, and Brittany Brave to name a few. Follow Queen of Hearts on Amazon Music or wherever you get your podcasts. Hello and welcome to Watch For Crappins, a podcast about all that crap on Bravo that we just love to talk about. I'm Ben Madelker joining me today, today as usual is the one the only Mr. Ronnie Karam hi Ronnie how are you hi, we're here on crap ins on demand. So if you want to watch

us not just listen to us you can go to patreon.com slash watch for crap ins support us at the crap ins on demand level and you get access to these.com slash watch what crap ends support us at the crap is on demand level and you get access to these videos we do them twice week we also have a bonus episode that we do normally once a week we did two times this week because I was down with the COVID last week. So we recapped Dubai on the latest bonus episodes if you're wondering where our Dubai recaps are it's on the bonus episode right now. So that's there. There's also a wonderful discord community.

If you don't know about discord, go explore it. You're gonna love it. It's really, really wonderful. So that's all the stuff. And today we're talking Southern Charm. Ronnie, you're looking lovely today. We're in shades of red today. We are. It's a red wedding over here.

Red wedding? Yeah, I'm doing good. You know, something charmed. Super. I don't know if it was fun, but it was something. It was on TV. So there was that. That was fun.

And oh, I did the KC podcast. Reality life with KC, we talked about Ultimate Girls Trip this week. So go check that out. That just came out today. So go listen to her. She's always a good time. Gotcha.

She is a good time. It's funny, I just traded some tweets with her last night because Love Island USA just suddenly arrived out of nowhere on P-Cock. I mean, what? Cannot with that fucking show. I was watching something and Love Island US came on and I was like, okay

Well, they like this show what I turned I turned it off in two minutes I can't the whole thing is Well, yeah, and girls with bikini standing up on jeeps. How do you watch that? It's well the first kill my inside my insides are dead, okay? I can't even swallow. There's nothing to catch it. I've left nothing left on the insides. The first episode is sort of like the episode that you have to get through it because it's like the most quote unquote fake episode. It's the most like it's the most produced.

I feel like I mean given that they're all produced. But then after you get through like the coupling, then it's just sort of like big brother, but romance instead of scheming. And I'm just very happy because the US version finally has Ian Sterling back doing the jokes. And on top of that, they curse now. Like, I don't even know why Love Island was on CBS.

Like, that made no sense. Like, the most conservative network, they put Love Island on. But now that it's on Peacock, the vibe is just right, and the guys are so hot on it. So like, I was, now I'm doing double love Island duty between US and UK, it's crazy. No. Well, one of one girls, there was one girl

who said the dumbest thing, when I was just, she was like, I like a guy who has high emotional EQ, but I don't like a mom's, I don't, I don't remember, but yeah, your instinct is correct, Ronnie. I'm just saying that. But then I was watching Westworld, which has gotten so stupid. I mean, and that's another thing. It sounds like I'm talking about love Island because like, of course, it's stupid, you know, like it's kind of what it is.

Yeah. But that's gotten so ridiculous. And I was watching that and I was like, but is this really better at this point? Like, am I really a better, like a smarter person for watching Westworld instead of Love Island? The answer is no. Okay.

So I don't really know. I'm on the hunt for something good though to watch. I'm telling you, love Island, it's a slow burn. But like, I can't slow burn. What is this like breaking back? Where it's like, well, the first season's kind of a slow burn but like I can't slow burn what is this like breaking it where it's like the first season is kind of a slow burn get through the first eight episodes and it'll be great well you know what I was about to say I'm so sick of people

telling me oh you're gonna love the bear or just wait till episode seven I'm like I got to watch seven hours before gets good so like now when I'm like oh love islands great just give it it gets good. So like, now when I'm like, oh, love Islands, great. Just give it, like, I don't know, give it like three episodes. You're like, three episodes? I'm like, I watched your freaking stupid drama about like a lady pushing a ball up a mountain for two seasons before it became semi-interesting, you know?

Yeah, but at least they're working towards something. Like they're, you know, slowly building, you know, building, building blocks, putting, I was gonna say building threads, but you know what I mean? They're like slowly crafting something together that goes somewhere. Love Island, where is that going? It's going to Monkey Pox. That's where it's going.

Well, that is first, well, isn't that exciting? It like has a real like stakes. But it is definitely going to the monkey box. That is true. It will be definitely a monkey box island. But at the end of the day, I will say given that all these shows apparently, this is the way we watch TV now is that we have to endure like five or six hours of like meh before something interesting happens at least with love Island. There's some like really hot guys to look at in the meantime. You know, and then we've got Southern Charm,

where we got through eight seasons and five episodes, and it builds up into a bowling night. Yeah, I was gonna say really, with Southern Charm is like, Southern Charm is the prime example of you'll watch the entire season and be like, that was okay, and then they'll be like, one good episode, you're like,

I love this show. Yeah. So here we are at Southern Charm Date. This is a crap and it's on demand Yeah. So here we are. It's Southern Charm Day. This is a crap and on demand video. So we've already said so high. Sorry for that. You said that until I was already saying it again. Okay.

That's a good reminder. Guess people thought it was a bonus episode. It's podcast. It's called Watch It Crap and I feel like I just slept on my face on my and you know what? I slept on my face on my. So that's why I feel like that. So let's start.

I held in a sneeze this morning. And then I have now that. So let's start. I held in a sneeze this morning, and then I have now that thing. You know, when you hold in a sneeze, and then your sneeze decides that you pass a aggressive to you and be like, fine, you wanna hold me in? I'm gonna give you all this not in the world because you didn't let me out. And now I'm like, I'm like a perpetual

like on the verge of sneeze for like an hour now, but not actually sneezing. So I go now, you want me to come out now? Yeah. Okay. So here we are, Southern charm. Okay. So we start where we ended, which, which again, I have to say, we say this every week, but Naomi doing these openings is hilarious, because Naomi's not even on this show. Yeah.

I don't even think they just it. They just brought Naomi. They just brought her in to be like the narrator from Into the Woods, who's really not involved until the very end, and then he just gets stopped on by the giants. I know. Watch out for Big Feet, Naomi. Watch out for Big Feet.

Yeah, she's just, yeah. So we're at this Garden Party. And, you know, Venita is, she is sort of clashing or being clashed with Catherine and Olivia and so Leva has decided that she's going to try to like, can I set the tone guys, can I set the tone now that I've already dropped a bomb of created this chaos at this Garden Party because of course last week they all like, like Patricia made that toast to like let's

have a clean slate or whatever it was and then Levo was like well actually I know there's some issues can we talk about them guys and then of course everything's ruined. So now Levo is trying to like backstep that and say like guys can I set the tone because there are times where issues get muddled into not knowing others person. Because I have a bar. I have a bar. It's just get muddled.

My show will be coming out. Case anyone's wondering why I'm on these shows because I have another show that's going to be coming out soon and things get muddled on that too. Get it? Watch it. Level land. Level land. You know, it's the most intuitive title for that show.

Level land. So, yeah, she's like things get muddled, you know, like when you stir the shit, we also started at the bar too, by the way. So, um, she's like, for example, in this moment, Venita's personality is kind of to speak that way. And I can understand Catherine that you're not receiving it that way because you don't know her that way yet. So I get that. I love that this all comes down to, you know, it's just Vinnie this, maybe it's just Vinnie, Vinnie does way of speaking and not telling you, are you teaching

your kids not to be racists? So, Catherine's like, yeah, well, I don't know her that well. Well, she doesn't know me that well either. Now let's keep it equal. It's like, okay, good one, Catherine. Yeah, well, now Ron, remind me since I was watching this in like a COVID-A's last week, wasn't the whole, the beef was that, of this specific fight was that, if Anita was like, yeah, let's talk things out,

you know, there's you and there's you, like, well, we'll do number one, you, the number two, you, right? She was sort of being joky about like, we're gonna go down the line and resolve this and then I wasn't, didn't think it'd map because it was like, well, why am I number two? Why am I number one, right? Wasn't that why Catherine was bad?

Leva said, like, okay, there's issues at this table and we need to fix it. And then Venita, like, taking her cue goes, okay, you first and then you next, like, okay, great. So I don't know if she was joking or not, but I mean, I think it is like that immediately puts them on the defensive, you know, and Vanita had already told Catherine, she went up to her and she's like, oh, hey, how's it going? And tried to act like she was being nice,

but it was kind of another like Catherine Katherine, you're a fucking racist conversation, and Katherine's not having that, because that was like last season, I guess. I'm not gonna be in the release, right? Look, my overall feeling is that Venita is put in a terrible situation here. She's brought onto the show where someone has just done all the stupid racist shit online.

She's brought on the show to confront her, basically. It was like, Leva and her brought on the show. It's like on the show to confront her, and basically it was like, Leva and her are brought on the show. It's like almost like the producer's saying, look, we're doing something about it. We're gonna have someone confront Catherine about it, and it won't be our actual cast. It'll be two new people that we're gonna bring on. And now it's season two,

and they're not really friends with anybody on the cast, really. And so they're making her continue the storyline. Like I'm not really sure what's going on, but I feel bad for Vinny though. Like could she have her own life that we can focus on? Yeah, I mean, I definitely got the sense that when she said that thing at the Garden Party about like,

okay, you first and you next. It was sort of like a, it like came from like sort of awkward, awkward energy of like, like I'm addressing the elephant in the room that there's two big things here that we have to talk and it's almost like, isn't this funny that there's like these two things?

And it was almost like this. I think she was trying to be disarming and instead, of course, they took it and was like, oh, fine, that's the way to do it. Okay, so I'll be second, fine, fine. That was like, why are you guys getting mad at this stupid part here about the first and second? As opposed to just squashing these issues that you guys have.

Well, then you've got Olivia coming in, who is a total dodo bird. What's the point? She's totally up Catherine's ass. She's like there to be Catherine's wingman or whatever. But Vinita and Olivia made up. Like Venita came up to her at the college. They made up. So then Olivia shows up and gives all this attitude again. It's like I thought you guys just made up another acting like they've

been fighting this whole time. It's confusing and it's very like first season cast member stories like on housewives where they're like I have to fight with somebody and this is it. I'm gonna, I'm digging my heels in and we're gonna fight about this stupid thing that nobody cares about. Yeah, yeah, I didn't, I didn't understand why there was tension because I also thought it was squashed at that party.

So either way, Catherine is basically like, she's saying like, well, she doesn't know how I am, like, you know, let's keep it equal. So if I need to like, Catherine, I know everyone else attacks with the table, but I'm not here to do that. She was, well, earlier, you said to me, I hope you're not raising your kids like that.

Like, that was fucking insulting to me, erm, like, F word, oops, sorry, I don't give a shit because she's saying that in, like, uh, right to Patricia's face, Patricia's last could Patricia last last week was like no f words so and no no shit words either. Yeah so Taylor's like um I am so confused did she up cheat on somebody here? I mean that would happen.

Madison's like just don't ask questions, just drink. So Catherine's like, I mean, why am I, why am I losing my cool level? Why am I losing my cool? And she's like, because you like have emotions, Catherine, and that's totally normal. After I just tried to start like a gladiator fight. Yeah.

And Emma says, Emma is, I'm not, Leva is like, I just, I feel so guilty for starting this. Leva, you can't pull that card anymore. Okay, it's already, this is already the second time the season that you've done this. Okay, so you can no longer be like, oops, I started it.

Like this is everything. I was, I'm like, look, I last season, I was a big Leva fan. I stood by her side, but this season she's just, she's just stirring shit up and she knows better. You can practically see her holding her time card in her hand. Like she just comes in, a punch is in sits down and it's like, you

hate her. She hates you. Go for it. And then she's the one who got Venita going or like having this conversation or whatever. And she tells Catherine, listen, Catherine, the person who pulls you off your cool is the person who wins. So don't let her win. Look, you started it. Yeah. The need is your friend.

What are you doing? Exactly. It's her birthday party too, by the way, that you start, you air the start to get this ball rolling out. Not only that, it's her birthday party that you guys totally, um, surprised her by inviting people she doesn't like and not telling her. You invited someone who has documented racist behavior to her own birthday party.

Yeah. So Vanita is like, okay, so Olivia, why don't I talk to you if that's okay? I just want to make sure we understand each other. And Olivia's like, okay, so they walk away. And if you need us like, come on, let's do it. Come on. You can do it. Just like that. You got this. Yeah. And Olivia goes, no, I know I got it. Thanks for the encouragement.

I'm like, you know what? Shut up, Olivia. Shut up. Okay. You just got here. Yeah. So we go to their talk. So Olivia's like, what's up? And Vinita says, well, I just want to make sure that my party that I'm like good with everyone at the table. Already I'm like, this is not going well.

Who cares? I don't need to be good with their, I mean, if there's people at my party, I don't like, I don't pull them all over. No, never. I just like giving dirty looks and then just ignore me. You talk about them to everybody else while they're on their side because it's your party. I don't know why, I don't know why Venita needs to do this right here. And so she's like, you know, when we were at Catherine's party, like everything was good,

but at Naomi's party, I got a different Olivia. And Olivia's like, well, you got the Olivia that was walking out of the bathroom and was having three girls talking at the same time. So yeah, it's a little different. Now, but they weren't talking about Olivia. Were they, at this point, I can't remember. No, Olivia was inserting herself

into stuff that was not her fucking business. Like, you know, so Olivia's like, yeah, that was a little different. So if Anita says, okay, yeah, but besides that, like, you know, when you told me to calm down and Olivia's like, I did not say calm down and put like a hand in your face like that, I, you know, I just said calm down. So like, I mean, if you don't want to be told to calm down, then you shouldn't be yelling at me because like, I kept it cool. And so if Anita says, well, but I was uncomfortable with the fact that you walked away. She's like,

oh really? Well, I heard you throughout the term, break, and I'm not about to stick around for that. That is a very bad word, break, I can not believe somebody said the word, racist. Uh oh. You're like, oh,oh. You're like, uh-oh. You're like, uh-oh. Little white blonde ladies from the South do not like hearing the word racist. That's a very bad, very, very bad word. The only thing worse that a black lady having to endure racism is when the black lady actually says the word racism. That is just so offensive. Isn't that racism to white people, the word racism?

Just to have to be around that word when someone's had to experience that, that wasn't the white person. Oh my God. Now I'm not a member, they should have flashback of Venetus, that Venetus saying something about like, it was like a reference in that fight to Catherine making the monkey mochi,

but I don't actually remember the larger context. I mean, I don't remember the larger context of the conversation. I don't remember that conversation being like, oh, Catherine's a racist. I thought the conversation was like The conversation was about Naomi's party and how things went left and how the need is like well Why am I supposed to go beat all nice to Catherine after she made all that? Yeah, you know all the racist tweets and all that stuff or the racist DMs or whatever and Olivia hears that and walks right in and starts like,

well, no, no, no, she's not here to defend herself and sticking up for someone she's known for two minutes to get some airtime. And then they told her to shut the fuck up, which rightly so. And then so she walked off and made it a big drama with Austin. And Veneta actually was a bigger person. It was like, listen, it's like your first day at work. So by the way, they'll like comment you, I'm sorry, I went like that. And so the fact that they're even having this conversation again, like

they've never had that conversation is wasting my time. Well, I didn't know what I mean. I then poor Venita tries to actually, um, tries to she tries to I just spat right on my laptop. I'm sorry, I just gave my laptop COVID. But um, she tries to, she tries to, I just spat right on my laptop. I'm sorry, I just gave my laptop COVID. But she tries to, she tries to like, she responds by being, I can't even think of the right word, but by trying to be almost like clever in her words. So, Vanita goes, so you're not gonna stick around for it

because you're racist or you're not racist. And all Olivia hears is you're racist. And she hears is your racist and she hears that the old she hears capital Y the sentence starts at your racist and ends there that's all she hears and now she's now Olivia's just like what what did you just asking did you have the word racist in your question I can can, I'm God leaving. So she's like, well, I'm just asking because you're coming to Catherine's defense. So like from the outside looking in, explain to me. And she's like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, I'm

uncomfortable because that word, that horrible, horrible word used to hold back so many white people. Forgetting jobs. I'm really, really, ever be able to get. Yes. So easily tossed out in a conversation involving me when we've known each other five minutes. So when I hear that word thrown out there, I don't even know the reason you said it, but I'm checking out.

It's not okay. Okay, so you don't know why she said, why she said the word racist. You just heard it and you need to run away. Olivia, you're failing. You're failing. You're failing. You're more angry about just hearing the word racist

than you were about the monkey emoji. So there's that. Right, and listen, just to play devil's advocate, she didn't have to be so in the wrong because Venita's like kind of coming after her Like, oh, so you're right. Are you racist because you're supporting Catherine? You know, I don't know that that's That's a fight that's not current. A, so you keep bringing stuff up But I understand that Venita's put in that position where it's like she kind of has to keep bringing things up because it was never really resolved

I guess let's be honest. So I get that but if Olivia's argument was never really resolved, I guess. Let's be honest. So I get that, but if Olivia's argument was like, look, you're coming after me. I've known Catherine a very short time too. I don't really know all the stuff that's going on with Catherine. So if you're insinuating that I'm racist because I'm being friends with somebody who did something wrong at one time, I don't think that's fair to me. If she said something like that, she would be on more solid ground, you know what I mean? But coming out and just being like, I heard the word racist come

out of your mouth. Do you know how many white statues have been taken down in this city? Yeah, because of that word. It's like, you failed that one, Olivia. Yeah, I mean, Olivia's definitely felt like on so levels and so and of course then you were only a matter of time before she starts saying and you're not going to cancel culture me out on this video's like if I had that culture I would not like Catherine would not be here which I don't think that Olivia was able to follow that logic by the way. You have to be green lit to be canceled you know what I mean like no one has told you you're in a place to be canceled.

Yeah, man. Okay. And so of course we get the cancel culture thing. So we pretty much know who Olivia is now. I mean, I think that's pretty, I think that pretty much sums it up. Everybody says you're not going to cancel culture. I mean, I've seen you and you're all in the same place. And it's on a news channel that my parents

love to blare. Anytime I'm within a block radius. I'll tell you one thing. She definitely was not watching any sort of potential hearings that were airing last night. That's for sure. So I'll tell you all I'll tell you also who knows Olivia. Probably every customer service person at like target.

Like I bought this hanger broken. Okay, you tell me why are you gonna cancel me now? Man, well, I'm gonna see. Yeah. I'm canceling target. That's it. I'm cancel culturing you. I'm a show's here comes one right now.

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So, Vanita, like listen, if there was cancel culture, Kath, if I had cancel culture, Catherine wouldn't be here. Okay. I wish I think was a very good point. So then back at the table, Patricia's like, Oh, Lord, I've heard the f word, the shit word. Next thing I'm going to see it here, the cut fitness word out of here with me.

Come get me. Hit with me. You have to dial the phone first The you have to go to the phone just bring me a bell into the void and so So the Madison's like come on give me your phone. So Madison gets gets her phone and face times Whitney and I was like Get your mom and he's like oh her phone and FaceTime's Whitney and has like, come get your mom. And he's like, oh, mother, I'm here at home team barbecue. Imagine he goes, well, you're gonna have to leave because you have to come get her. I mean, do you want, are you born for corn or not? Get your mother. So then back to Vanita and Olivia, Vanita's like, listen, you have no

idea what it's like to be a black person. And then to hear Catherine say those things and then to have to be in her presence. And she's like, yeah, but I have nothing to do with that. She goes, yeah, but then you should address it instead of walking away. And she's like, okay, well, I'm about all about having those conversations, okay? But not he that like that is certainly not using disparaging language against the white people. Not he that like that is certainly not using disparaging language They get the white people I'm all about talking about racism, but not if you're gonna start saying words like racism and racist, okay? So

She's like well, can we just talk about banana use that word can that just be code word for racism? Okay, next up you say remember when Catherine Catherine was bananas? Okay, that's a conversational half. Some videos like, okay, well, there are some things that you and I don't match on, which is fine. And Olivia goes, you've only known me for five minutes. And just, and Olivia's like, yes. And you've known me for less than five minutes.

Olivia's like, well, I'm not making these claims that we don't match. I'm like, Olivia, are you arguing that, are you angry that she's heard of that you guys have not been like, have not instantly jelled while you're actively not jelling? Like, what is wrong with you? I don't know, but this was also another thing on the Needis part that's like a Catherine comeback.

You know me five minutes? Oh, really? Well, you've known me less than five minutes. This is let's make it look. Well, we need new writers on this. Just name that tune. I can know you in two minutes. You are the new show by Bravo.

You suck. You suck more. So Olivia is like, well, listen. Oh, Vinita's like, can I just talk without interrupting, okay, like maybe I can say my piece. And she's like, no, we are done because I think you had another agenda, which is another code word, you know,

there's the gay agenda. It's always an agenda, you know, she's like, you had another agenda for this conversation. And my agenda was to talk about the issue at hand. Which nobody even knows. No one even understands what that issue is. By the way. Yeah. The issue at hand is that A, you guys aren't seeing eye to eye. And so, once you tried to say that, you got mad at her, that she didn't know you long enough to say that you guys don't see eye to eye. So, that is the issue at hand. And the reason why you're not seeing

eye to eye is because you walked away during at hand. And the reason why you're not seeing eye to eye is because you walked away because you got involved in that stupid fight in Naomi's party. I don't know. So if in need of us, like them talk to me though, if you're willing to talk about that, then we're talking. But you guys already did talk about it.

You guys are struggling too hard to have an argument. We don't need to hear this argument, okay? Cancel this argument. This argument needs to be canceled cultured. Yeah. So they go back to hear this argument. Okay, cancel this argument. This argument needs to be canceled culture So they go back to finish the party. So now Venita's getting now Venita's mad because she feels like None of this would have happened if Madison hadn't invited these two girls Which I would argue yes, but I think actually Even more so Leva was the one who really made this truly happen. So

Well, they're all doing it because you you know, Venita is a new cast member. And so, like, what are you going to do? Just talk about being an influencer every single day. Like you have to do something on the show, you know? It's very... It's other bravo shows, like other housewives shows. They kind of force you into a storyline if you're not doing anything. I mean, having people you don't want

at your party invited without you knowing is classic. That's like a classic trope. Yeah. And that's how they see how you deal with it. But it's just, it wasn't really cool to her and it's not cool for her to be kind of sitting there alone when everybody else at the table are all these like white ladies pretending

they don't even know what the problem is or what Catherine did. Like if we're gonna have this conversation again, have the conversation, but to have it just being the only black woman at the table who has to be like, there's actually no other black woman here. Oh, you're right, you're right. But you know what I mean.

Yeah, but I doesn't say that. I have this need for responsibility to bring it up at a party. It's like, oh my God, It's just cringed to watch it sucks It was and I felt actually my heart really broke for her because she was she was really upset and she was saying She says that she just wants to go home and cry But she has to be there and you just sort of see her face and her face. She just she just looks so sad I actually felt so bad for Venita as she sort of was

Placering a smile on her face, but she was sort of crestfallen and looking down. I felt so bad for her that she had to have that. She was really excited for this birthday and then she had to have a conversation about racism yet again at her birthday. And you know, that's the thing, for all the thing that Olivia is like, I don't want to talk about racism, you know, like that's what we're getting thrown around so much. You think Faneeta wants to sit and talk

about racism at her own party? Do you think, don't you think that she's maybe the one who's actually more sick of having these conversations than you are Olivia? Like Olivia, you probably had to have three of these conversations. We need to probably have to have these conversations every single day.

It's exhausting for the poor girl. Yeah, so we go to Craig and Paige, Crage, brushing their teeth and doing that thing, they're like staring at each other in the mirror while they brush their teeth. It's very bring it on. Okay, it's very bring it on moment. And they're like laughing at each other. Have they like brush their teeth and page spits and cracks like, you, you spit halfway through. I mean, like, it's finally you do that, but

my kids weird. And she's like, um, that mic went sexual in my head, that's hilarious. We are so cute. And then we got to my your cute my crates voice. Yeah, you're cute. So then we go to yeah, yeah, yeah, I think y'all are the kids.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So then we go to Marcy, who is her storyline for this episode is putting talks on. So I can't sometimes with this show. What are you guys doing, a bravo? What? How is this casting? getting socks on. So I can't sometimes with this show. What are you guys doing at Bravo? How is this casting?

How is getting Shep's old washed up, Kessin, who finally got pregnant to put on socks a storyline? Who is Marcy? Why do I care? Now why the fuck is she on my TV struggling with socks? I don't care. And have another part in the cigarettes while you're at it, Marcy. I can't with this. Who casts this season? Okay.

Vanita, Vanita and Olivia, you're off the hook for the next five minutes. And then we have Taylor, uh, presenting basil to ship. And then, um, then ultimately we have Craig and Paige on a golf car, uh, going from his house to the local bar. And so they're riding along and he's like, I love our little golf cart, Dave. She's like, yeah, I love our little golf cart, Deeds towel. Oh my God, verse, so cute, you're so cute.

So cute, so cute. Yeah, you're good. And he's like, I love this, my bread. I love this, my bread too. Say something else you love. I love flowers. I love flowers too. I love the sky. I love this guy too

Like oh my god guys, okay, we get it So she's like I can't wait till Christmas because you said you wanted to celebrate like all of your Christmases with me and he's like yeah, I was being really nice right? I'm saying yeah when you're drunk You're really really nice. Yeah, you are you are You are. I say really cute shit when I get drunk. Yeah, I hear cute shit when you're drunk. Yeah, because I say cute shit when I'm drunk.

Yeah, you are. You are. You are. And of course, she's with Craig, so they see a bar and don't pass it the first time. So they get out and go into the bar and order some spicy blackberry margaritas and talk about Austin.

And he's like, oh, yeah, things went really good with Austin because like he invited me and Chef to Charlotte to like Reacon Act and then Austin, like, you know, he found out that Madison was engaged somehow. Oh, yeah, it's because I said a time run my phone and went off with Amazon. Like, came on, finally was really funny. You know what? Like, and he says that like Madison probably thought like that, that like announcement of the engagement

like freak Austin out. And so Paige is like, um, when I do get engaged, the last person I'm going to be thinking about is the person I dated before. In this case, Perry, I mean, right, we remember as Perry, right? But Charleston is like a weird place.

Like people buy things not only at a full price, they actually pay extra to buy their clothes here. It's so weird. Yeah, like if I broke up with someone, a buying, I'm never seeing them again. And he's like, yeah, but like in Charleston, like I went to a little party and my ex is, and it was like, all my friends were there.

So like it would have been weird not to go. She goes, yeah, right, and I totally get that. Like group settings all day every day, but being courted and being friends are two different things, right? Mm-hmm. Go ahead, I can't wait to hear your opinion on this. Um, well, I wouldn't say friends, but like,

Naomi and I have broken up, been broken up for like five years, and like, what if we went to lunch theoretically because maybe that's on the call sheet for tomorrow but just saying theoretically what if we went to lunch and they're just like now that would be crazy. I wouldn't go out with someone I've previously slept with for a one on one that's crazy now. Yeah okay okay but like what about this like we're not gonna get our nails done and be gal pals but like what if we just like had a wedding shower just but like what about this like we're not gonna get her nails done and be gal pals

But like what if we just like had a wedding shower just to see what it was like and then she could wear a baby bump around town Tell people it was mine just cuz like we're just friends No, that's sort of flatly insane. That's like liking but not subscribing so Okay, what if you injected some of her spinal fluid into your spine so like we could see if you got her accent, you know, because we're just friends. No, that's like literally going to M&H, but not to H&M, so no, absolutely not. Okay, but like, how about if we clone Naomi and then raise her like our daughter? That would be okay, right? That would be like lightly tapping and not smashing a like button so Look, I just want to hang out with her like it's the lawyer in me, okay?

Yeah, she's like the Italian in me would tell you know Well specifically the Italian me would not just say say no the Italian me would say now So Craig's like I get it not really. I'll just say I get the Italian would say no. So Craig's like, I get it, not really. I'll just say I get it. That's just a lawyer in me. You know, I like the Italian. They're like definitely unique things about you that I think are like really cute now because of it.

Like you're like a cute Italian. Like when I play Super Mario Brothers, I'm like, that could be paid with a mustache after she's eating a lot of foods. Like, it's cute. When you think it's so cute about it, murder. I was like, uh, what do the guys look like they've been hit over the head with baseball? But that's in the diary room session.

All of them do. None of a... Seb Craig and Austin all look crazy in the diet. They're like, ugh. You know, they're like crazy. Like, their eyes are in the diet. They're like, ugh. You know, like crazy. Like their eyes are in the half shut blood shot. I like that. I like that today.

Yeah, but that's how I look right now. So, um, now we see Austin walking down a street to Charleston beer works. So I just assumed Pringle was going to become strolling up because he sat down and I know like, he sat down on an empty table at like a beer garden. So I just assumed I go like hey, well, I was at the bank and I saw that you know You're at the bar. I thought maybe there's a lovely lady in here in an open tap. I don't know So like call every surprise me did not show up this entire scene or even episode

I love that they have a place called us Whatever Charleston beer works and it's like all guys who don't work there in the day. It's like, well, at least the beer's working there. Okay, at least the beer's keeping that economy going. So Austin comes and the waiter comes up and he goes, do you need a menu or do you need drop hop? He's like, yeah, drop hop. It's still sad.

So that is so sad. That's like me walking into Chili's and being like, hey, it's my birthday. Would you mind playing a song called Watch What Crap is episode 1822? That'd be great. Thank. So wow, that's a song from our future, Roddy, because we're on episode 8. So, it's a premiere. Roddy is like, we're gonna have a premiere. I mean, your birthday is coming up in almost exactly a month. Maybe it'll be Maybe we will have reached that that episode. So Austin gets dropped up and Olivia shows up And she's like really turned on by Austin cuz he's wearing sneakers and a hat. Wow. What a novel look?

Wow And then I don't know why I'm higher I'm higher babe so that they order food and like I feel like in any other context I'd be like oh that's kind of fun But hearing Austin ordering it, ruined it for me, he's like, oh yeah, we'll have the, the totchos. I was like, I'm like, I'm like,

I'm a totcho. I just have to assume it's Tater tots presented like nachos, but I just got mad at it. I was like, actually, I was like in theory, that sounds delicious, but seeing Austin order it, I was like, this dish is already ruined, and I haven't even gotten to try it yet. Especially because you know,

Olivia's gonna be wearing little bits of it all over her face, and she spits it all over her. Yeah, it actually comes with full, fled strips of bacon, but they definitely did bits by the time they got onto Olivia's face. So they joke about how this is their first time actually on a real day with nobody else joining them and also like, when did I see that? When did I see that?

And she's like, before the Garden Party, well, the Garden Party was something that was combined for Vanilla and Madison, slash congrats for Madison, because you know, and he goes, oh yeah, Madison, that's a surprise, it's for me. So I got engaged in that, so this party has to be about me, me, me, me. And even your engagement party has to be a double big of me, has to be a double big of me.

It's a double big. Olivia's like, no, to self, never bring up Madison on a date. I'm like, no to self, don't go on a date with Austin also. So, a lot of people have sneakers Olivia. Yeah, yeah Yeah, I guarantee in Charleston you'll find a few guys with sneakers who can also wear a hat backwards So Austin's like I mean

It's like a alright well, but he's made her prayer so I be it around the world and I I I I I can't find my oh Actually, I found my baby. He's literally all over Charleston. Okay, got it. So Austin's like I mean not to harp on this was insane right now But she got me convinced that I wasn't funny. I wasn't good looking nobody likes me people that I was an asshole I mean she's insane how she got me to think that. I'm like, you were just watching your episodes, weren't you? That's what it was.

Also, I'm waiting for her to be wrong in this, you know? It's like he's mad when he watches the Jeopardy Champion kid every question, right? He's like, oh! Call me when she gets one wrong. So Olivia's like, well, this conversation really doesn't have to do with Madison, okay?

I mean, but I can't even go on a date with you. And he's like, okay, let's dig in, let's dig in. You know, look, here's the thing about it. You can call it PTSD or whatever, but like, in that moment with her, I would show, wait for it, wait for it, because I'm wearing sneakers, your panties are about to drop, I say this. Vulnerable, I was so, for it wait for it because I'm wearing sneakers your panties are about to drop. I say this Vulnerable, I was so

Okay, you don't know this person you don't know Olivia. Okay, stop using fucking bachelor's speak Yeah, you're worthy of a date God, but he was fuck off. He was so vulnerable when he was cheating on Madison with that three way with those girls That was a lot of vulnerability. So Austin's like, I mean the fact of the matter is we were insanely together for three years and it just sucks to show That your bother but like showing your bothers total sign of weakness understand that I'm gonna look like a petty weak bitch I hate that. I'm like no, you're allowed to show that you're bothered I think what you're not allowed to do is like go back over and over.

Like say all these things and go back over and over again. And then I like you're the victim when you're like the asshole in the situation. Yeah, but I'm going to look like a petty wee bitch and I hate that. I hate that. And now it's built into dating. You know, look, I just want to say, look, I I just wanna take it, she's like slow, take it slow, wow, shocker. Listen, I'm not trying to lock it down.

I'm not one of those girls. Oh, really, you're not. Can we cut to a week ago? World of be is like, if you then wanna impregnate me within the next five minutes, I'm done. I don't have time to wait. Yeah, I'm looking forward to a life where I'm sitting

on my porch trying to put socks on, okay? You know what I'm saying? So, yeah, but she is right in the situation. I think this conversation is a little presumptuous. This is our first day by ourselves. Why are we... He's breaking up with her. He's breaking up with her.

They're dating. This is like literally... The Tacho's haven't even arrived yet. Okay. Yeah, he's like, I'm sorry, but I cannot give you this top show. She's like, okay, bye. Here's like a helicopter waiting for her outside. Yeah, I mean, I think that Olivia's a twit,

but she deserves better than Austin. Like, she shouldn't be messing around with this bullshit. I don't know, time will tell, I guess. So it's by the way, like, that. So it's not a high bar, okay? Like to say that she doesn't deserve Austin, like also the same as saying she doesn't deserve to walk on a beach and get stuck by a syringe people. You know, like people don't deserve things.

Doesn't matter who you are. Oh, I don't know. I'm not willing to go that far. Some people might deserve things. Some people deserve things, okay? So Seize like yeah He's making the easy part the hard part. Yeah, wait till you start dating him for real. You'll see the hard part So now they have the end of their bachelor's seat and where he's like where does that leave us?

And she's like, I don't know. He's like you have one more week to be as vulnerable as I need you to be I'll be fucking people in Charlotte. Bye. So you leave. So then, um, Marcy, another Marcy scene. Why? I don't know. I really don't know.

Oh, because she's the furious with the Marcy scenes. Like, no, did Marcy spend all of her trust? Why are we giving Marcy a job? No, because Marcy is the first person effort to have to figure out how to put together baby furniture. Did you not know that? That's what they had to film it because she had to put together a thing and call her mom and ask her how to do it. Like, she had to make a crib. But she forgot the mattress. She forgot to go to goons to get the mattress. So. Well, that's how a baby learns. And it's also how

you get a baby with patterns on their skin. I mean, all sides of that. But her whole thing is like she's already got this arc, you know, she's like, I was the party girl like, Chef, yeah, you know, like Chef, I was doing the same thing, Chef was doing out there, they were like, party and I had fun, like doing younger shots on my tits, you know, like it was great.

And then I got pregnant and he didn't, and everyone's treating me like I won the fucking Nobel Peace Prize You know what I'm saying and I got to put together a fucking a fucking bed They need a mattress in it like why why is this an arc like chef did it, you know if chef had gotten to this point Where's like cars? I don't even know how to put together a baby bed. We'd be like oh that's so funny because that's Shap and of course he does it but you Marcy, we don't know the old you. We just know you, the you, the camp at Onsauks, or make a bet.

Okay. Yeah, since she calls up her mom, man, and she's like, what do I do? I asked my doctor how to breastfeed. She told me to get the book called the Womanly Out of Breastfeeding, which is literally 500 page book, and her mom's like, oh, Marcy, sweetheart.

Listen, if you think all I think about all those women in the early days, okay, they didn't have books, they just did it. In fact, I think a good way to go through life is to have the same mentality of ladies from the 1800s, okay? It's gotten our boys this far. Yeah, great advice, mom. It reminds me of those people who are like, I'm on the caveman diet.

And I'm just eating like caveman. Because you know caveman, healthy. Cavemen were missing all their fucking teeth and died when they were like 19. Okay. Why are you trying to copy that? They're not my mom. They're crazy about my mom.

Saber tooth tigers and stuff. Okay. You just have to heat up some lean cuisine. So, yeah, so basically, yeah, but I mean, Marcy does have a point, which is that like, like her entire family was treating her like she was deranged that she wasn't married and had a baby where a chef gets a free pass.

So that does definitely suck. But whatever. Um, I mean, okay, it does, but I don't think Shep gets a free pass. Everybody's always telling Shep, when are you getting married, when you're gonna get married, you're too old to be doing this. When you're gonna get married, well, you know, Cameron definitely probably is still causing him up. It's like, shepherd, have you found someone to settle down with yet? Shepard? I'm in mine at Chick-fil-A to get my one waffle fry

allotment for the day. I let fast food. Hey, this is just Cameron to remind you I'm relatable. Okay, do you get anybody pregnant yet? Okay, bye, loser. Remember what I brought my little baby to the aquarium and he walked around? Come on, that was a relatable moment. Okay, bye, I was on the real world.

Do you think when she's in the drive-through window at Chick-fil-A, they're like, Hi there, welcome to Chick-fil-A, Can we take your menu? Previously on Southern China. Previously on my Chick-fil-A order. I got waffle fries. But then Catherine said, why don't you get waffle fries for me? So it was a big drama. Do-do-do. So Venita's house. So we go to Venita's and this scene is about how organized Veneta is. She has a basket for everything, even her dog toys. At a label and I was like, this is too much, but I was also kind of envious because I actually thought she did a great job. And I'm today, this afternoon,

I'm rearranging my pots and pans. This was already a plan of motion. And I probably think they've got. Well, because it was Amazon Prime Day, like, well, during the height of my coveness, I, it was Amazon Prime Day. So I went a little wild and I bought some new pots and pans. So everything's getting real,

at with the old, in with the new rearrangements. So then when I saw this, I was like, yes, yes, I'm going new pots and pans. So everything's getting real, out with the old, in with the new rearrangement. So then when I saw this, I was like, yes, yes, I'm going forward with this plan, I'm rearranging, I might make labels. Well, there you go. So it was like a HGTV segment for you. Or that was that show on Netflix, the home edit. The home edit.

Put everything in a rainbow. Like that, like what does that do? Yeah, do you know Reese Witherspoon now? Remember when they were so excited that they met Reese Witherspoon? They were so. Um. Yeah. So Leva comes over and you know, last year I kind of believed that there were friends,

but this makes it obvious that they don't even know what you're talking about. Yes, I don't even know what you're talking about. Leva comes in and she's like, oh my God, wow, how cute my friend. What an apartment my friend. It's like a single girl's bachelor pad, my friend. I'm like, I'm never gonna try in this. Like, come on, mama.

I know. So, yeah, they are like walking around and they go outside to have some tea and love us like oh Sorry for the garden party and they're just like are you are you sorry Love is like you know when I saw you get upset. That's why I that's why I like to talk to about took talk to Kath and about her feelings You know as the star of level land coming to bravo, sometime in the immediate future, you know, these are the things I have to do. And she tells us, remember, I'm a hostess. So I'm always frustrated when people are mad

and they don't say, why? Oh, really? Because you're a hostess? What kind of hostess is that? Guys, I was going to put you at that round top right there, but that other family came in and gave me attitude. So I gave it to them. You're going to have to wait 20 minutes. Like the hostess is just starting to sit with everybody at the restaurant. I know, but also like, if you're like the hostess of a party, isn't your job to make everyone feel

as comfortable as possible. So you actually are trying to smooth things over and like navigate away from my spurgs. I don't understand what you're talking about. Yeah. So she's like, yeah, I saw you upset with Catherine. That seemed really real. So that was good.

Good job, friend. Good job. That was real. And she's like, you mean Olivia, right? She's, well, you know, look, my feelings come out strong because I don't really get one-on-ones with everybody.

It's like, I'm on this show, but, oh my God, you guys, I'm so sorry I have to answer this. It's like I'm on this show, but oh my god you guys I'm so sorry I have to answer this. That's terrible and we're on video, Ben. That is so unprofessional and normally we would just cut that out but this is like an on-demand thing. So Ben, would you cut it out of the audio? I'll cut it out of the audio. I'll cut it out of the audio. And then people who are on the screen are like, what did I miss?

What amazing phone call? A Tiffany, did I miss? No, but here's the thing, they're a plumber, okay? And so, there's a plumber. Oh, I totally get it. You cannot take that call. There's a fact that call. Yes, and there's like a, there's a fucked up thing.

Yeah, you have to take the call, because I don't call you back. But there's a fucked up thing because my sister and niece has come over. And I swear it's when they come over. And I don't think their poops But there's a fucked up thing because my sister and niece has come over and I swear it's when they come over and I don't think their poops are too big. I think that they're probably fleshing

their girl things, which I get. But you know, I guess you can't do that with this kind of toilet and they're denying it. So now we're having like a girl time fight. Like, are you, they're like, why are you accusing us of stuff? So then there's that element and then you've got this lady who's now called me four times to say no.

And then she keeps using The words squeeze you in lady. It's a toilet. Could you start talking about squeezing? I don't want to think about poop I don't like poop. I don't like to talk about poop and now all I have to do is think about poop and schedule poop and she keeps saying squeeze Like sorry, can we can we squeeze you in that? Let me see if we squeeze you in today I'm like lady. I know when in here can squeeze anything. That's why you need to come How about Monday? How about we squeeze you in Monday? So you can squeeze one out. How about that? Oh, that can't do Monday How that Tuesday maybe maybe Tuesday maybe Monday should say are you not come? Are you not being accommodating because you're racist or because you're not racist? What? I'm not having this conversation anymore. Oh, good. Anyway, sorry. Poop drama over here.

Yeah, it was very exciting. I don't know. So anyway, back to the show, Vanita is talking about how she basically has a hard time because she has a hard time just opening up in general. But then, you know, and she gets time because she has a hard time just opening up in general, but then you know, and she gets scared because she is scared of she's being super open and then it doesn't go right, then she's more nervous to be open again and she doesn't get to have one-on-ones with people as you were saying. She basically is only thinking about parties.

And yeah, she's basically, she's in a sucky situation. But here, she's in a sucky situation, but here's my thing. You don't get one-on-ones with people because you're not really friends with the people, right? So like, if you're not like calling them to go out to lunch for the show's sake, you know, to pretend that your friends are whatever, it's gonna be all these group scenes

and it just doesn't work. Like, she shouldn't be in this position. And I guess it's her taking the job too, right? It's like, okay, you're on the position as the voice of reason versus Catherine or whatever, but it just makes for a super awkward time for her and just kind of a boring show for everyone else because it's like, why are you even fighting with these people? You don't even like them. They don't deserve it.

You're too good for these people. I'll say that. Yeah, I would like to see her actually develop. Like, I would actually be more interested in watching her grow her relationships with the rest of the cast members than with having, you know, like having to deal with Catherine. So, yeah, but she just doesn't want to be fake at the end of the day. So there's that. So now Craig, Shep and Austin are gathering together to go to Charlotte for this big Harris teeter meeting that Austin needs to go on and Shep, so Craig is going to drive and Shep, Shep sits in the back seat and he goes, well, I guess I'll sit in the back and stretch

my legs so to speak. I'm like, no, I mean, you're literally stretching your legs. I don't, you don't have to say so, you're just stretching your legs, shit. It's okay. Yeah. South-Septok. As Tom Wolf once wrote, I guess I will stretch my legs so to speak. Garsh.

He plebis unum. A quatt? Make a left. That's what they say in Latin. As Joan Didian once wrote in her column, I suppose I'm just going to turn the air on Flurbus Unum. A quetz? Make a left. That's how they say Latin. As Joan Didian once wrote in her column, I suppose I'm just going to turn the air on back here for a sec. Wherefore art thou my radio station?

Of course. So Craig's like, uh, shep, I'm like still scared from when you tried to drive us to the Hamptons as a lawyer, like I was rocking back and forth and my guy had to throw up out the window. And Craig's like, ship is an awful driver. Like awful. It's like gas, break, gas, break, gas, break, you're cute. You're cute. Sorry.

I'm paying just standing over there. You are. You are. You are. You are. You are. You are. She's in every mile marker. You are. I gotta hate mile markers.

They're so stupid. I know too. I know that you're on your horse. You're like, hey there. Only 17 more minutes to go. Three more mile markers, buddy. We can do it. I know.

I know it's useful for emergency vehicles but I just see them and I'm like I just feel like you could have more charisma. I could use better graphic design on this mile marker. Yeah, you know, you're no you're no animal crossing, that's for sure. You're no deer crossing. Well, there was so much in government, I'm not really sure which administration that someone got creative and they're like,

let's let people buy mile markers. So they're like, this mile marker was brought to you by Johnny Carson. It's like, wow. Johnny, great job on 126B, buddy. No bad midler. No bad midler with her signs. And actually, we have a Clive David up

and where my parents live, there's a stretch of highway. That's like this part of the highway has been adopted by Clive Davis. I was like, oh, okay, fancy. So they often tell us that he got them hotel rooms and he's got a big meeting with Harris Teter Harris if I saw the Harris Teter is gonna be huge it's gonna be good So he's got some big meeting and then they're like they have this music segment where they're like let's listen to music

Yeah, and then they put on some new pop song and pretend that they all like it. What it wasn't hell? It wasn't a pop song it was part of like the bravo I can't, what the hell? It wasn't a pop song. It was part of the Bravo music library because they've just played that song. I forget, it was either on like Atlanta or Maritom Medicine, I believe, because I remember when they played it, I was like, this doesn't sound like the typical

like interstitial song. I was like, I think you want it, baby. But because we just heard it, it actually sounds like it was, it was like, it was in our minds, but we didn't really pay attention to it when it first happened. So it felt like it was a song on the radio. It's like, oh, I've heard that song before.

But actually, it was just, I don't know, I don't know why they did that. For a moment, I actually thought, is this some synergy? Does like, is there some sort of like record label that's part of like the, like the NBCU umbrella? That's what it seemed like. Like they're gonna come out with like, is there some sort of like record label that's part of like the, I like the NBCU umbrella. That's what it seemed like. Like they're going to come out with like a now Bravo Southern charm. Well, they did see some Bellarini.

They did. They sure did. That's true. Um, so let's see. So they get to Austin and check those. Hello, Charlotte. Austin's former hometown. No, it's still a hometown. Okay. Hahaha.

So distinct. It's how hometowns work, okay. So they go to the hotel and they're unpacking in their room and stuff and Craig is opening a bottle of wine and messes up and he goes, Jesus Craig. So, wow, he's got like a little mini-shep in there to be hateful to himself. Yeah. Oh, Craig, can't even open wine course.

But I do want an option. You're a cute wine. I do want to say one thing about the drive that they're at one point, like Craig is driving and Austin's like, do Craig, do not let this guy in, okay? Cause I play the scheme on the highway. I play this game and Craig's like, what, be a dick? And it's like, you know Austin is that guy that will not let you're like merging

out of the highway, he will not let you in. I was like, wow, the layers of Austin being awful just continue to reveal themselves. So then Austin is of course has to do an on-camera shower scene because that's just Austin, you know, that's Austin's ego. He loves those. Him and Chef, both love those. So he does that and then he gets dressed and does his hair and gets ready to go to his meeting or whatever and goes to Craig for approval. He's like, so I took him on short or shall I? I'll talk my shirt. Craig's like, well definitely if you have your shirt tucked in, you you look like you're more there for a meaning. Gosh, Craig! Sorry, I kept the chain on the door because I was trying to take it off. You're such an idiot, Craig! shot up, tiny shop. Shut up.

So then, so then she goes to FaceTime Taylor and she is in Shepp's house cleaning his dishes, which I thought was strange. Oh God Taylor, fucking get a life already. And then shepp is sitting, we know this is gonna go bad because Shepp is doing that thing with his foot where it's like, it's tapping really fast, which in the reunions is what happens

when he's always about to be confronted and he knows he's fucking wrong, right? So that's how the call starts. So she's like, I mean, I'm cleaning up and he's like, have my house. Oh, were you still some of my force? Cause I have too many cars, I'm so relatable. What happened with his forks?

Like, is he been taking forks from her house? Is that what's been happening or he just has been collecting forks? I don't understand how he has a forks surplus. That doesn't make sense. Well, I have to say, I do understand it because I am also a constantly single person. And when you're single, you don't have to use a fork

and a knife, you know, because like who's watching you? You just cut everything with your fork. Or if you can't, you just like stab it and then hold it up to your mouth and bite it. Well, it's on the fork, like why do you need the knife, you know? So you're always out of forks before you're out of knives. So I doubled up on my forks too. Now I silverware, the fork thing spills over

into all of the other things cause I run through those quicker. So I think that might be what's going on with Shep. That whole interesting. Maybe. Yeah, thanks for this. Thanks for joining us for this completely useless mystery solve. Yeah, I feel like for me it's spoons. Spoons is where my surplus is. But I guess it's more just like the way he said it, it sounded like it wasn't, it like, it's a recent thing that there was something of a fork gross. And I don't know why all of a sudden he has lots of forks. Like it, I don't get it. So anyway, so then we go back to Craig,

who is now, he's on his, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's got the glass of wine in his hand, which already it's like such a nice bed cover, and I'm already like this feels dangerous. And then ultimately, we see he wants up his face on me or he puts the wine glass just on the comforter, not even a nothing stable, it's just there.

I think this says a lot about Craig. I think it says a lot about the choices he makes, Paige. I think it should be a red flag for her. So she's like, hey, pumpkin, hey. She's doing that. We just started dating and this is real. This is who you're dating and you're like, hey, pumpkin. All I really do is pat and call you cute little names.

Me, me, me, me. And he's like, hey, baby. Listen, Austin, but that's in a hotel. It's like uptown or like downtown or wherever. She's like, so, you book through a hotel, just in Charlotte. Somewhere in town. Somewhere in town.

No one like about the word town. It has the owl already built into it. So, yeah, they're talking about like Craig's gonna meet her parents on Monday, which is funny because I thought you he already met her parents when they dropped her off at Winterhouse or picked her up, but he's gonna meet them and it's like, yeah, we're gonna be so cute. Like it's a big, yeah, yeah, you're gonna wait to meet your parents. I can't wait to meet you.all. I can't wait to make them. Yeah, now, yeah. So they hang up and he's like,

I almost said I love you. Bye, but I did. So we have to wait for the very special episode for them to first say I love you. Yeah, Bachelor rules they're playing by now. So Chef is like, oh my gosh, okay, we're gonna, gosh, we're gonna bowl. Man, Taylor, we're going to bowl. And then like, there's seven or eight bars by the hotel. So we're going to go

out and have fun at bars. Hopefully there's girls there. I can't wait. Hopefully I can't wait. Wait, why are you mad? Now, why would you? He's a gas lighter. He's a fucking gas lighter. He's like, we're going to go bowl. Why don't you just say you're going bowling? Why do you have to be like, we're going bowling and then there's seven or eight bars to choose from. He's just trying to get her to be, to say what she does, which is, okay, have fun. But he's waiting for her to do that. Be good.

So then he can fly off the handle. And that's what happened. She goes, okay, well, be good. And he goes, Taylor, like, what am I going to do? Are you crazy right now? And so, he's like all upset. By the way, well, he says that this is because of the past, because he kissed a girl in a stairwell, at least that's what he has owned up to publicly on the reunion.

And he's like upset because this happened a year and a half ago. But I believe everything that we've learned from Miss Shannon Bedore is that it takes two years to build that trust back. So, sir, you're still in that window. I'm so happy. Happy. So he tells the camera crew, so, guys, go!

The camera's still! I need some time! This is very serious! Happy! So he tells the camera crew, he says, guys, cars, cameras down! I need some time! This is very serious! And then he goes into the next room and he's like, Javier, I told you, I'm not going to change who I am and I'm not going to stop going out. And she's like, well, I'm not going to be that woman who was left

because she was cheated on by someone who was at seven bars. And he's like, how many drinks have you had, you drunk? I was like, wait a second. I've gotta go. Keep drinking, Betty Ford. Keep drinking. So, God, this is really God.

This went deep. I know also like how dare you, Shep, to be say to her when she does something and say, like, oh, how many drinks have you had, meaning that she's being so irrational because she's possibly gotten drunk. When being drunk, it's actually the excuse you use for so many of your behaviors. Oh, I was drunk.

I didn't really know what I was doing. And yet, if she were to get drunk, it's like, oh, she's just out of control. I even though she wasn't even drunk, but like using drunkenness as a weapon against her when it is the shield for you, doesn't fly with me. Also, what she do is she said be good, get over it. Yeah, there's that too.

And also, you're the one who did cheat, okay? Fucking baby. I mean, it's actually kind of funny with Shepp and Catherine. Like, ultimately, they both did things that were wrong. And I think people would be willing to say, look, we're gonna give you the benefit of the doubt, like if you show growth, but like, you can't get angry at the people that you've hurt, okay?

Because it's what you did. And you just have to accept that. Yeah. So then Craig and Sheffa are in a bar waiting for Austin. So Craig's like, I want to get the Atlas and Wonderland drink. I really don't know what it is, but the name got me. And she's like, yeah, you know why? Because he loves Disney. Yeah, but that name got me. And she says, yeah, you know why? Because he loves Disney.

Yeah, but that movie really freaks me out. Yeah, it was crazy because like, what's a tea party? Like, doesn't even make sense. It's like a party for the letter T. I don't get it. You know, Lewis Carroll is watching this in heaven. And that's supposed to be the smart one, is it? Disney, dare you. As Ronnie knows, I watched Alice in Wonderland for the first time last week.

Oh, that's true. I was like, why have I heard of that? I've never seen it before. I read the book when I was a kid, but I was literally last, oh no, it was a week and a half ago. But very, very recently, I've only watched for the first time. And it is kind of, by the way, that's a crazy movie. It's like a literally, first of all, Alice is a monster.

I don't think that anyone's really appreciated that. She just walks in, she's like, oh, sorry, I'm just gonna take over your home and explode it. She's just eating, no. She's eating pills, somebody says, and she's like, okay, I guess I'll eat it. Alice, do you not have any standards for yourself?

Do you have any self-control? Relax. Stop that. Poken that Doranob in the eye, that Doranob. Yes, it's a Doranob, but it is also a sentient thing. You can't just be poking it and turning its nose around, Alice. Good, please. Alice is kind of a little bit.

She's awful. She destroyed that poor rabbit's house. The rabbit had a lovely house. She's like, let me call into that. Oh, I've got to see this rabbit. Oh, well, why are you so obsessed with this rabbit? Like let him live in the light. Yeah, stalker. Like in stalker Alice. Yeah, it always cracks me up when people are like, Oh my God, drag queen Bingo. What is this teaching our kids? I'm like, you just probably showed them Alice in Wonderland. And that's like about some drug addict, you know, skank, breaking into places, stealing drugs from people. And then she's like, I've had an F. No more nonsense. Oh, now you are the one who says no more nonsense.

How about you do listen to your lessons. Biotch. your lessons. Biotch. No more nonsense. No more nonsense. Well, I'm sorry. You're the one who chased the freaking rabbit into his rabbit world. And now you're now you're calling all the shots. Doesn't work that way, Alice. Yeah, I was on the queen side for sure. I was like red queen for the win. Take around. I love. I you know, you know, I you know what I like red queen, because you know that like when she's not playing croquet, she's like, watch, listen to Indigo girls, you know, oh, she's watching Housewives 100%. Um, so then I like it, because it had mushrooms and also the lead was a thin blonde woman.

I'm still trying to meet her. Of course. So he ordered his drink and then this is Shep who's always like using as many words as he can to be the classiest one and to prove how the rich and classy and educated he is. He just sticks his finger in his ear and he's like, wow. So guess what? I talked to Taylor. It's like, gross. You are so gross. Get your fucking finger out of your ear. Yeah, well, he, look, as correct, it's actually kind of funny, because he looks down and he goes, uh, your legs going more than usual. What's going on?

There's like smoke coming out from the belly of the bar where his foot is like, so, um, he's like, well, she told me to be good. Well, but was she joking or was she worried? And did you preface all of your sentences with, I mean, we're not dating anymore. So did you tell her she looked cute? And then when she said, you look cute, did you say,

you look cute? And then when she said, you look cute, did you say, you look cute, et cetera? He's like, well, God, it's like, it's angst. It's angst whenever I go anywhere. She's got to get over it and go's like, well, God, it's like it's angst. It's angst whenever I go anywhere. She's got to get over it and go, yeah, well, that's always going to be a consequence of infantility and a relationship. He does that. He got that board. He does that. He does it. He's bored with you and he's looking down on you. He always goes, oh, he does that

a lot. It's like Craig, it's like, Taylor's anxious when you leave town because you keep cheating on her, when you leave town, like how she's supposed to be, like sleep peacefully at night. Which is interesting because, as far as we know,

Shep just kissed a girl, but the fact that Craig says, you keep cheating on her when you go out of town, and it's like, oh, is there more going on here? I mean obviously yes of course of course. That's the only time we got caught publicly So chefs like yeah, but if dirt's gonna be a problem every single time I mean look when your boyfriend is going around saying I mean Taylor knows I'm not into monogamy Oh, does she because you just said that what last week or the week before and now here you are like oh my god

Like she's mad that I'm not being my dog amaz I don't think she got the memo But he's like yeah, she's gonna have a problem every single time. There's gonna be a problem Well, you don't have a problem with her doing your dishes. That's for sure So it's like you he picks and chooses what he's gonna have a problem with okay I mean you want to balance my forks. That's fine is what he's gonna have a problem with. Okay, like, I mean, you wanna balance my forks, that's fine. He's not about monogamy, but he's definitely all about the perks of monogamy.

That's for sure. So, yeah, so he's complaining, oh, this was a year and a half ago. And he's just saying that, if he hasn't gained Taylor's trust back, he never will. I'm like, well, but like, you know what's not going to gain the trust back is you snapping at her instead of like, you know, reassuring her.

You know, that's, that's the difference. I mean, how many, how many times we have to watch episode of seasons three through seven of Summer House and Kyle and Amanda to know like what you're not supposed to do in these situations? I think he's just doing, he's just trying to start fights in big blowouts so he can go cheat and then be like, but we were on a fight, that's why. You know, because you didn't trust me and then you not trust me,

trusting me made me a trustworthy. So it was your fault, but I'm sorry. It's typical. So basically they talk about that and then Austin comes in and he's like, lads laughs. I Drink through on me because I just sold a shit on the beer a shit The guy sat down and he said having this beer in our market It's chopper already. It's chopper already. It's insane right now. Like, Harris Tudor wants my drop-up. Also, I ran into Sherry Berry.

Yeah, from the elevator. She wants drop-up too. It's insane right now. Too. So Craig goes, oh, hey, you know what? Do they need pillows? So it's like, does they ask about me? Do they know Shepis?

Oh, so then Craig's like, let's do a shot to celebrate Austin and Shepkis? So then Craig's like, let's do a shot to celebrate Austin and Shepkis, something vanilla. Yeah, they went and get a lemon drop shot. And I was like, this is insane right now. We're doing lemon drop shots to celebrate. It's just what we're doing.

Like, gosh, we have a whole night of drinking. Yeah, we gotta start slow. So Craig's like, hey, Shep, do you want to talk about your thing now? Or when we get drunk later? He's like, gosh, when we, do you wanna talk about your thing now or when we get drunk later? So, gah, garsh, when we get drunk later, that's how I process my emotions best. Garsh. So, I think it's like, Shep, what the fuck happened? I'm like, jeez, Austin, relax, okay? No.

So then we get this weird knockoff song of Take Me Away. Take me away. Except it just goes, Take Me Away. Take me away. Except it just goes, Take me away. Take me away. Okay, still a rip off. You don't have to say it twice for it to be a rip off. Who's some charge of music to this season?

Where's my, bop bop bop bop bop bop bop bop bop bop bop bop bop bop bop bop bop. Like, it's Girl's Smile. They need good old-fashioned Girl's Smile. No, they need to be contemporary because they're going to Inc cocktail lounge, home of the best Lisa Vanderpump purple lighting in Charleston. So it's Catherine and she's trying out some new people.

So we have Amy and and Christy and they are ready. They're like, Inc social wise, this is so cute, it's so cute right now. I love it. Girls night, girls night. They're doing that thing. They're doing that thing. Yeah, they like 28, but they're decided to dress like they're 52.

Who, 52, you're all trying to like 22. It's really weird. It's like a whole set. Talk about Alice in Wonderland. Yes, they're all Alice in different states. Right. By the way, Alice in Wonderland, Alice is directly responsible for the death of that lizard. I don't know if you remember that part of the movie,

but when Alice goes into the rabbit's house and she blows herself, she gets really big and then they all get scared of her. They send in a lizard to take care of her and she sneezes and the lizard goes flying off She gets really big and then they all get scared of her. They send in a lizard to like take care of her and she sneezes and the lizard goes flying off into the sky. Never to be seen again in the movie. We have to assume he's dead because they say goodbye

Mr. Lizard or whatever. He literally killed a lizard, a member of this community and they're like, whatever, she is a murderer, okay. But she's cute, love her hair, love her hair. Look, let's give her a film. Let's give her a film. Okay.

So these alluses, they're all sitting here with Catherine and just be like, Woo! Chair said the chair's look. Catherine's like, I wanna cheer, I wanna have a new love, new bit, love cheer, so the new new, new, new, new, new, new,

bachelor nation. It's so the big purple cat comes over and it's like, hmm. Would you like anything to drink? Just believe it. The later dress is a gesture cat. Jennifer definitely has some Allison here. Like she's definitely like,

hey, baby, are you serious? Rabbit around here? That's how I wrap rabbit on the block baby. Oh so they talk about what kind of boys they like they really like tall people and like tall people who can pick them up oh my god so Madison is there now and she's like oh yes you got you guys are basically describing what I got so you're looking for someone like wea cuz this was good about it he legit makes me a better person cuz he sports I'm going to be able to make some of my friends and friends and I'm going to be able to make some of my friends and friends

and I'm going to be able to make some of my friends and I'm going to be able to make some of my friends and I'm going to be able to make some of my friends and I'm going to be able to make some of my friends and I'm going to be able to make some of my friends and I'm going to be able to make some of my friends and I'm going to be able to make some of my friends and I'm going to be able to make some of my friends and I'm going to be able to make some of my friends and I'm going to be able to make some of my friends and I'm going to be able to make some of my friends and I'm going to be able to make some of my friends and I'm going to be able to make some of my friends and I'm going to be able to make some of my friends and I'm going to be able to make some of my friends and I'm going to be able to make some of my friends and I'm going to be able to make some of my friends and I'm going to be able to make some of my friends and I'm going to be able to make some of my friends and I'm going to be able to make some of my friends and I'm going to be able to make some of my friends and I'm going to be able to make some of my friends and I'm going to be able to make some of my friends and I'm going to be able to make some of my friends and I'm going to be able to make some of my friends and I'm going to be able to make some of my friends and I'm going to be able to make some of my friends and I'm going to be able to make some of my friends and I'm going to be able to make some of my friends and I'm going to be able to make some of my friends and I'm going to be able to make some of my friends for me some ramen in a trap house. That's not over. By the way, let's not overlook the Catherine describing her ideal man. She's like, I love tall, dark and handsome. So, Hayden Christensen. I think was that a call back?

Did she say in the path that she loved Hayden Christensen? Either way, it's like, I'm glad Hayden Christensen is still on someone's radar. Oh, yeah. So, wait, I'm glad Hayden Christians is still on someone's radar. So uh, wait, which one is Hayden Christians? He was Darth Vader in the prequels. There was actually just like an article in like New York, New Atlantic that was like whatever have to Hayden Christiansin Just bizarre that movie those movies happen to Hayden Christians people are like grouse movies suck. I'm gonna leave his God So they start so of course Madison has made it about her current boyfriend, like as she won

what everybody was looking for it, but of course also brought Austin into it, which is hilarious. So the girls are like, Oh my God, that's the perfect man. Does he live here now? Which you get and which you find him, girl? And she's like, well, he's in Sacramento and we're gonna do my co-stole, well he's in San Grimano and we're gonna debauch

house though because he's more man so more man wonderful so he has a tail no not a merma and a more man so he just always ask for seconds not not more like more means a religion so he's a Christian? No. Cross is. He sings songs not Ethel Merman, Merman.

Good, because those people are guys. Those are guys. So Madison's like, when I found out he was Mormon, I said, do I have to wear them undergarments? Because I can't even wear panties. And then she's like, and then he said, one month before we get more. So we're not going to live together because we're, because he's Mormon until we get married. But one month before we get married, no sex.

He said, and I'm going to take the vibrator to no red flags here whatsoever. Well, I love that he's so religious that he's like, I'll keep fucking you until one month before the wedding. Yeah. That's what is Joseph not count those times. I mean, what the hell? That's what he has to apply to not be an outer darkness. So That's the outer darkness sperm count starts exactly one month before So then now the other guys are up in char Charlotte and they're at their bowling alley and they meet Whitley not to begin to use Whitney also not to be confused with Whitley from a different life

Different world. Sorry or different life The point is Jasmine guy is not there. So they're like Whitley Whitley is kind of like well, we couldn't get Pringle today, so we're gonna get fake Pringle instead. Like Charlotte's Pringle. Yeah. Also, Chef does the shot song, walking into the bar, he's like, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure,

sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure That was a good shot song. Gar- Gar- Gar- Gar- Gar- So they go in and order exactly what you think they're gonna order. Five acres. Um, so then they go to get bowling shoes and start their bowling. And chips like, wow, I really need to get out of a mood, Gar- Yeah, and then he's ordering and he's like, hey, Gar-

waitress, I really don't want to have to use my fingers with my eating because you know putting them into bowling balls. So do you have any like knife and fork stuff? Because, well, we do have salads. Pussyballa. He's like, oh, gosh. Oh, okay. Oh, is that disgusting?

Okay, I'll get pulled chicken tacos, which are actually pulled with fingers. So maybe that'll cancel it out. She's like okay. So they do like a, he's like let's do a group photo for Taylor's. They do a group photo and they send it and, um, and he sends it and then Craig is like, hey, remember what Shep said? If we avoid the problem, it will go away as long as we don't address it then, then she's mad, then she won't be mad anymore, because you said that, she's right.

And he's like, yeah, because I ignored what she was feeling, and it worked, it totally went away. He's like, oh really, that's where you're getting yelled at. So, Chef is so funny. He takes like a picture to prove he's only with guys right before he goes talk to a girl at the bus. I mean, it's so him, right?

So Craig tells us, Chef is a one man band. Like even having a backup dancer would make him crazy because like he cannot have anybody else have the attention. And chefs like, I just want to find. And Craig's like, yeah, he's just not cut out for relationships. No, go on. We'll still be the funny though right, imagining chef like playing the drums and making horn sounds like having the pedals all over him like that.

That's one bad thing. Like a courtier and whatever those. So yeah. So anyway, so Taylor writes back to the photo and she's like writing paragraphs and she's saying things like, please just know I love you and I'm not against you. Please I'm begging don't be defensive towards me I have some fear anxiety about about how I've acted and Chef is like gosh, I'm like don't sink us. Don't be the architect of your demise Like chef you are being the architect of your demise. That's not her fault. Oh, this fucking guy This guy is such nerve so he's an asshole to her and then she writes a text saying hey, I'm sorry. I was an asshole to you

And he's like, can you believe this? course paragraphs got architectural digest of your own demise You're like the I am pay of your own misfortune. Garsh. Okay Frank dreary misfortune. Garsh! Okay Frank Dreary. Garsh! So then we see Shep is now at the bar and he's already talking to this girl and he's like, have you ever been in jail? Have you ever woken up in jail? She goes, yeah. And he's like, me too! Now that's the one you marry. Yeah, right there. As I then Craig, now terms, Austin, and he's like, Taylor thinks that there's only a campfire and chef is like saying there's like,

actually landmines and like, accelerant and like, matches and like, newspapers and like, all sorts of flammable stuff. There's like a truck with gasoline right next to campfire. And like, I guess what I'm saying is, you keep stoking the campfire. Eventually the campfire is gonna, it's gonna burn because like, shept in the policy of deprecotions

and it's like, it's a smoke, don't start fires, fires, basically. Dude, what's going to explode, lad? What's going to explode? He's like, well, you know campfires and landmines and stuff. Cause I know shit and you know shit and everybody knows shit. But Taylor and Austin's like, oh my god, I can't believe he's bringing this up on camera. That's a very urgent tongue flicking. So then that was it.

Yeah, next time Austin talks about jumping from windows and Naomi says my, my, she's telling Venita, my family is throwing an oyster party, but you're not. No, it's Olivia. It was Olivia. Oh, I was like, what the hell? What did Venita do? She's really coming for her. No, Olivia's like, I'll have get Oyster Party and you're not invited.

So, you know. Who knows? Olivia's having an Oyster Party? Yes, Olivia's having an Oyster Party and Venita is not. I think it was, I thought it was Olivia. Maybe it was Naomi, but I thought it was, it makes more sense if it's...

Thanks for listening to our recap show. The point is not confuse everybody. We're like, next time, Will McGitz mad that Fred was out late. Well, the point is this confuse everybody we're like next time will my gets mad that Fred was out late Well, the point is this if it was a little bit. I think it's I think it's pretty rich her complaining about cancel culture and then not inviting the need to a party so Yeah, what an asshole whoever was it's not very nice of you whoever Somebody to an oyster party, shame on you.

I have to look it up. I feel like I have to see, okay, well, this will be the cliffhacker who didn't invite Venita, but whoever didn't. I hope it's a Olivia because it's not as effective about the cancer culture thing if it's Naomi, but if it's Olivia, I could be like, Ha, you just, you complained about cancer culture, but you're the one who canceled Vanita from your

part. Well, also, I think we should end this by giving everybody some good news, okay? Apparently Taylor did leave Shep. So thank God. Yeah, that's the rumor. Because I was about to fly out there and find her and be like, girl, you don't know me. My name is Auntie Ronnie, getting the car. I'll explain on the way to the airport. Your new name is Fred Rika Vanderkamp. Here's your new ID. I've drawn it with crayon, okay?

On the back of flange cards. You do good work. Okay guys, well thank you so much for being here, thanks for listening and we still have another recap up live this week, we have Girl's Trip that will be coming up later today probably. So thanks so much for being here, catch you on the next one. Bye. Watch what crap ends would like to think it's premium sponsors! Ain't no thing like Allison King! Ashley Savoni, she don't take nobelone! She's not just a Sheila, she's a Daniella!

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