Watch What Crappens - Southern Charm: Reduce Reuse Recycle

Episode Date: May 24, 2019

Chelsea has a housewarming on Southern Charm and Kathryn admits to re-boning Whitney. Meanwhile, Shep mansplains the right and wrong ways to cheat while refusing friends mac n' cheese. To hea...r this week's bonus episode with Danny Pellegrino, Annabelle DeSisto and Hannah Brown and to find Crappens on Demand video recaps, become a Patreon member at Patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens. ***New Limited Edition Shirts! "Straight to the Rosé" and "Rosé All Day" merch available at crappensmerch.com! **Crappens Live is coming to Milwaukee, Pittsburgh, Minneapolis, Baltimore and Nashville. Find ticket links at watchwhatcrappens.com See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.Our Patreon Extras: https://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Hey, Prime members, you can listen to Watch What Crappens Add Free on Amazon Music. Download the app today. Get ready for a double load of Queen of Hearts. It's me, Jujubee, and I return to guide sexy singles through some ronchy blind dates. Cameras off. Voice only. Launching during pride. Queen of Hearts takes Miami by storm, with Daeders' Cuppe from Tampa Bayes, Just Chas, and Brittany Brave to name a few. Follow Queen of Hearts on Amazon Music or wherever you get your podcasts. Watch what crapens would like to think it's premium sponsors. The Bay Area Betches! Betches!
Starting point is 00:00:32 Making the Slayer Taylor! Aaron McNickalis! She don't miss no trickle-ists. Hot dang! It's Jessica Dang! Lisa Wallent. Now that's what I call Wallentainment. Let's go on a bender with Lauren Fender!
Starting point is 00:00:46 Hava Negila Weber! Sarah Greenwood only uses her power for good. Jamie, she has no last name. Ashley Savoni, she don't take nobeloni! You don't touch the Nikki Morgan letters! Sip some scotch with Jessica Troch. What you talking about Willis? It's son of gillis. Ain't no thing like Allison King.
Starting point is 00:01:04 Megan Berg, you can't have a burger without the bird just saying okay Christy wow reading dowry Kelly Barlow when she goes Barlow we go high low here the Homer with Jeffrey Boomer Hannah God I love that banana Anderson and our super premium Patreon subscribers mean a kuchikuchi Kuchikuchi! Let's get Racy with Miss Stacy. Shannon out of a cannon Anthony! Incredible edible Matthewsisters. Lulu Simon.
Starting point is 00:01:33 Sue, Sue Studio. Give him hell, Miss Noel. Kelly Grant, the Grant Master. We're all in with Julia Conlin. Yes, we can with Howley, Carolyn and Ann. Nancy, Cease and Desisto! We love you guys! I'm Ronny Keram. You can also find me over on the Roseprix Bachelor Rhet. Roast, which is in full forest, full swing, everybody. And here I am with my gorgeous little friend, my little sickly,
Starting point is 00:02:28 sickly little friend, Ben Madelker, Ben has not created the cold, but he's got it. They did create the real house where as a kitchen island. It's a really funny cartoon. You can go find over on the YouTube TV channels. Yeah. Hi, Ben. Hi, how's it going?
Starting point is 00:02:44 Good, baby. How you feeling's it going? Good, baby. How you feeling over there? You know, I'm feeling better because I'm actually drinking some tea out of a homemade mug that one of our listeners gave to me. She actually made it with her own like via pottery wheel and glaze and all that stuff. Oh, yeah. Those are really cool. Those glasses.
Starting point is 00:03:02 Mine has beular on it. She drew a beular on mine. Yeah. Those glasses. Mine has beehler on it. She drew beehler on mine. Yeah, how amazing. So that, you know, and of course, how could I ever really be two down in the dumps if I'm here talking with my work? Has been Ronnie about something to him about if nothing else, Southern charm. It's like the nicest thing anybody ever said to me. Whoa, I'm sorry, but that's how you feel, okay? Hey, everybody, what a day, okay? We've got Southern Charm today, but first, Quick Show, gonna do this quick,
Starting point is 00:03:28 gonna talk really fast, everybody ready? Ready to write things down. Live shows, here they are, June 7th in Milwaukee, June 8th in Minneapolis. That one is sold out. So people in Milwaukee, get your butts over to that show. Then in July, on the 25th, we're in Cleveland at the Music Box, supper club. Then the 26th, the very next night we're in Pittsburgh.
Starting point is 00:03:48 That sold out. Thanks, Pittsburgh. And then the 27th, we are in Baltimore, Maryland. So everybody get your tickets. Nashville, we're selling super early over there. That's September 27th. So go get your tickets for that. And this is your last chance to buy our straight to the rosé and all rosé all day breakfast
Starting point is 00:04:06 lunch and dinner shirts and also shut up brand our game of throne shirts. You can find those over at crap and some urch.com and you can find links for all of our bonus episodes, all of our live shows. This week's bonus episode was with Danny Peligrino and a belt of sisto and Hannah Brown. It was like a little drunken party we all had. It was so fun. Go listen to that. And we're doing crap and it's on demand videos.
Starting point is 00:04:29 This week's video recaps were for Vanderpump Rules Final reunion and Real Housewives of New York from earlier this week. So guys, you can find links for all of that over at patreon.com. And thank you. Yay. She'll done. Wow. You really did it, Ronnie.
Starting point is 00:04:45 You did it. You did it for myself, very slowly. Oh, so Southern Charm, you know nothing to worry about. The season looks like it's going to kill it. Yeah, I'm loving it. I'm so into it. I mean, I always love Southern Charm, but we have some concerns. And just love this episode.
Starting point is 00:05:03 I feel like the season is off to a great start. And you know, it's like sometimes when you're just with the characters that you love, they can almost do anything and you'll be happy. But in this case, they actually have stuff that they're doing. So this week's episode opened up, you know, we went back to the tradition that was started last season, which is that during the previously on Southern Charms, it's like, interjected with random lines from Trixi Monical singing her Southern Charms verses, you know. But this time they like remixed it. So it wasn't just like
Starting point is 00:05:36 he's got the sandals, scandals, the past the time. It was like, he's got the scandals to pass their time. I was like, hmm, fancy 2019. Yeah, it was so good. They can use that song. I mean, wow, they've remixed that song so many times. They're really impressive. Yeah, it's amazing how many, how the legs that that song has, the legs. Yeah, my favorite is way.
Starting point is 00:06:03 Well, whoa, the kids go loud. Oh, my personal favorite. Yeah, it's good. So we opened a day with Katherine trying to make a phone call. And you know, Katherine's in that state that I think we're all in now that we're used to having like our Siri and our Alexa and all that stuff, which is not really knowing how to do it without that.
Starting point is 00:06:23 She's like, call Austin Crowell. And it's like Austin Groot. No. Call Austin. Which Austin? Austin Crowell. West Austin?
Starting point is 00:06:36 No. Don't call him. Did you meet the unemployed fuckboy from the past two seasons? Yes. Okay, we're calling the YMCA. Did you meet the unemployed fuckboy from the past two seasons? Yes! Okay, we're calling the YMCA. It's like, no! This is an emergency. So while she's trying to do with that, Chelsea's on the phone,
Starting point is 00:06:57 just like talking to someone. I don't even know why I wrote that down. I wrote Chelsea's on the phone. I know I wrote Chelsea and that's all, because it was so fast. I was like, well, thanks. The glad we checked him Chelsea. And then Craig is on the phone. He's talking to someone. We find out later who it is, but he's talking to someone about a contract and he's like,
Starting point is 00:07:14 Oh, yeah. So can we go over that contract now? And she's like, um, you're in a journey. So I'm going to let you do that. I'm your assistant. And then we cut back to Catherine still trying to call. Not West Austin. No. I don't have a number for AA saddle. That is so serious too. It's like nothing didn't even. It doesn't sound like anything I've said.
Starting point is 00:07:38 You know, she's like calling the extended stay in Austin that we were at. call him the extended stay in Austin that we were at. Hi, his Austin crow there. No. So then we got to Shep, who's with some hot blonde girl and he's coming out of the shower because that's like his favorite. The ship is the only guy on Bravo who showers as much as Jack's on camera and you know that's the only time they fucking shower. Yeah, it's kind of funny because quite often Shep looks so dirty and yet we see evidence
Starting point is 00:08:04 of him showering quite a bit. It's weird how that happens. It's only when he can take his clothes off in front of the camera. Yeah, I think. So, yeah, so he's with this random blonde chick and he's putting on Deodorant. It's really a very appetizing scene.
Starting point is 00:08:15 And then, um... Yeah, I didn't write down her name. I just wrote down, um, too good for him. Yeah. Yeah, soon to be traumatized. So then, Catherine, meanwhile, she's finally decided she's going to call Austin, and she has one of those, yeah, soon to be traumatized. So then Catherine, meanwhile, she's finally decided that she's gonna call Austin and she has one of those like enormous iPads That's like the size of like the Mona Lisa. And so she has that she's like hoisting in above her head to get her good angle Like the thing needs like a pulley and like a crane because it's so huge arm there it is my good angle
Starting point is 00:08:42 So then Cameron's like two pedicures I love him a most. Thank you. So she sits there and whoever she's meeting is late. So she's in a pedicure chair just falling asleep. Yeah. And this really nice classical music is playing and and then like a fucking train train comes over her head. Here's Eliza. Yeah, Eliza Eliza Limehouse and she's like a Brock Hawk tail. I got kind is Eliza. Yeah, Eliza Eliza lime house and she's like a broadcast tales like I got I got kombucha. Yeah, okay How do I use this chair? Does this is this remote for the chair? How about this? Would anyone mind if I just started singing? I brought some symbols like I started clashing the symbols together It was like quiet quiet
Starting point is 00:09:18 This is should chair go back anyone anyone anyone, anyone. And Cameron's like Jesus Christ. Why am I always the one who has to shoot with these feet? Yeah, why am I stuck with this? So then Liza starts telling us a little bit about herself. You know, she's like, well, being a warm house is like being in Charleston royalty. I'm not trying to raise Charleston Charleston in. I'm on my dad's side.
Starting point is 00:09:41 I'm 15 to my mom's side. And yeah, so yeah, that's my mom's side and yeah, so Yeah, that's my life right there. Yeah, they're all politics. I can't go anywhere with that seeing my name splashed on a fruit truck or a breeze You know you just can't get away from me. I'm like that they showed like a big fruit truck at a rouse I know like that's fame right there. She's like I look at a Sprite can and I'm like that's half my fame right there. She's like, I look at a Sprat can, and I'm like, that's half my name right there. So then, so then Liza is talking about how her dad had an affair. What a shock.
Starting point is 00:10:11 What a shock that someone from one of these big families had an affair. So he had a big affair, and it was like a giant scandal, and she's like, it was terrible. I mean, yes, the personal heartache and the lack of trust, and I now have a man that's terrible, but even worse, we got black from the spot, I mean, yes, the personal heartache and the lack of trust, and I now have a man that's terrible, but even worse, we got black from the splot from social gatherings, like parties
Starting point is 00:10:32 when normal get invited to, we don't get invited to them anymore, I didn't even get to debut. It's terrible. I know, well don't worry, you still get to see your name on blind trucks, so that's great. And Cameron's like, you know what, can we just not talk for two minutes? Okay. I mean, this, this Medicare feels amazing because I don't even let Jason touch me. And the lies because you sound like my mother. I was like, God.
Starting point is 00:10:54 So it's super, Eliza's super dark and weird. And I don't know. But I think she's going to bring a really funny, spunky, fun, spunky energy. And Cameron's, Cameron's basically like, listen, here's what happened. You came into that dinner party the other night and you over talked and came on too strong. It was a disaster, you know? And Liza's like, really? And she goes, you know, I think that the,
Starting point is 00:11:16 I think that Catherine has a problem with me because I have a close relationship with Thomas. And Cameron's like, no, I think that Catherine just probably doesn't like you because you have a relationship with Thomas Oh, did you just say that? Did you just say that I wasn't listening? I was trying to pretend like I wasn't sitting here with a giant chatterbox on my one hour off on the week Yeah, Cameron's like she's been burned by so many people Eliza and Eliza goes, I mean
Starting point is 00:11:39 None of us have easy lives. I was like you're prostituting. They're getting better You have no fucking job. What are you talking about? Yeah, they're getting bad at care for your car. You have no fucking job. What are you talking about? Yeah, exactly. So then over at Catherine's house, she's like trying to get some stuff out of the car and Austin comes by to help her move some boxes out or whatever. And so we get like a little tour of her house, which is like this gorgeous four story house downtown, it's already furnished, 2,800 square feet.
Starting point is 00:12:04 And Austin's like, like wow this is insane this is insane you could throw a hell of a swaray in here actually it's insane it's like it's really not this sheetful live on the side of town this is like what do you pay for this which is so rude and she's like out of this world and he's like how much she's like out of this world and then it comes on screen sixy six hundred dollars a month Wow, that's nuts That is and it makes me worry for her I got very very worried. I was like this is not this does not seem prudent
Starting point is 00:12:36 You know, do you know how many Amazon Prime boxes that is? So she's like let's go to my courtyard. Welcome to my courtyard He's like you must be over the moon with this place. I mean, you could probably climb a stack of dollars. It goes all the way to the moon that you're going to have to pay for this place. I mean, everybody's going to give her a ship for this house. Everyone is. Yeah, it's does not seem like a wise decision,
Starting point is 00:12:57 unless she's just like really banking on getting some raffinal money, you know, like she's just like, she's a payday in the future. But I don't have a lot of teaming. Talking that there's a payday in the future. But I don't really. There's a lot of teamy. So you that. There's a lot of teamy. And she's like, yeah, I mean, this is a huge deal to me. I'm moving in on my first home. I'm accepted by society, AKA Patricia.
Starting point is 00:13:16 Yeah. He's like, yeah, you were sitting right there with her in her creepy sense. She's like, gosh, I like how that sounds. I was like, I don't. What are you talking about? So then they start talking about. Let me fly out there. So then, they're talking about Madison and basically Austin and Madison are exclusive right now.
Starting point is 00:13:38 And Catherine's like, I hear you guys fight and everyone's talking about it. It makes me think of me and Tomas. And then she goes, you know, if Thomas had ignored all the bullshit, we would have had more of a shot. Like, no, he's just like a terrible person. I hate to break it to you. Yeah, I don't know about that. Yeah. I mean, if Snorted hadn't,
Starting point is 00:14:03 this Thomas hadn't snorted all that stuff that he was here. I mean, I don't know. It's just like, no. No, it's not romanticized top. It's not, there's no rivets. Please don't do a revisionist history. It's not you. It's him.
Starting point is 00:14:14 It's him. It's him. And it's not, he's not good. Oh, so she's like, look, you just need to tell everybody to say how do you fucking business? And he's like, but she makes me happy. And that's all that people should care about.
Starting point is 00:14:24 His mouth just keeps moving like he's giving a bottle on. And then we go over to Austin. Um, being Craig jamming to his ring. Oh, oh, yeah. Yeah. Craig is there. And Anna Hayward is on the phone. That's, that's his operations manager, aka assistant. And I was hoping that we would actually never meet her. I liked her being this disembodied voice on the phone, sort of like in that movie her, right? Like she could have been like Scarlett Johansson or something. So she calls up and she's like,
Starting point is 00:14:56 have you started anything, have you started anything you have to do today? And he's like, he's just sitting down on the couch with a big iced tea. We haven't grabbed the remote control. He's like, uh, like, so that means no. Okay, I'm on my way. And he's like, Anna is the reason my life is where it is now, like, stirring tea and a fur robe.
Starting point is 00:15:17 Yeah, we've had really long time. We see a lot of fresh. Flashback of him stirring and stirring and stirring and stirring like in a fur robe What is he wearing? I don't know I don't know and he's like and I really keeps me in line and she's like Okay, I've got three checks for you to sign and she's on the phone with him. Okay Craig I got three checks for you to sign is like um before we do that Is this my breakfast and he's just poking a cinnamon roll. That's right in front of him He's like, yes Craig. Yes Craig
Starting point is 00:15:49 Where do you think it came from? I need someone to nag me that's not my girlfriend And so he tries to look busy for when she comes in yeah He's like trying to set himself up at the computer like being productive This is breakfast try it's like eating to set himself up at the computer like being productive. This is breakfast. Try eating the as your Hitler. This is breakfast, right?
Starting point is 00:16:13 Craig, just because something is physically in front of you and it's before 10 a.m. does not mean it's automatically breakfast. Oh, why they didn't have icing on it if it wasn't my cinnamon roll. You got icing on it with your fingers Craig Craig no one told you to put icing on your ballpoint pen. Oh So it's actually kind of delicious. I Like that it has a wet center Craig that's ink
Starting point is 00:16:40 So so then we see Naomi and she's driving to her work and she's got Gizmo on her lap and she brings Gizmo into the office and I mean I love Gizmo and the way he walks into that office Just like walks in and just has the back room like hello ladies. I'll be in my office Thank you. Yeah sitting in a box. Yeah, I love when people pretend they can train their cats She's like come here Gizmo. She's like okay, Gizmo is just walking off a leash. Okay, Gizmo, come out of the office. She's like, no, he just keeps walking. Yeah, it was a pretty bold move that she basically just like took Gizmo out of the car. I'm put him down in the parking lot. I mean, that's a bold move with the cat. Yeah, and Chelsea's dad didn't have the dog on a leash later. And look, I know that
Starting point is 00:17:19 that's how life is, you know, because I can't because my dog is not good like that. I did not spend a lot of time training, training my dog. I'm a bad dog parents, okay? My dog will run right out of the street, get hit like chase the squirrel. Like it just makes me nervous seeing it. Yeah. Well, uh, Gizmo is very disciplined. No, Gizmo just like walks in and finds a box and sits in it, which is already,
Starting point is 00:17:44 like, significantly more productive than Craig has ever been, by the way. Like at least Gizmo notes what he's supposed to do in an office. Yeah, so. He's like, you're not gonna try and eat the box? God, you're a step up from Craig. So Naomi has started an e-commerce site called La Ba Yee.
Starting point is 00:18:01 And the Lula Lula, you job, ah! It's like, wow, it really rolls off the top. It's gonna be easy to get people. And she's like, she's talking about starting around business and her own like, little thing and how her family has non-trapidinal spirit. She's like, my dad always says, we Bonjour, Composual, Bonjour, Bonjour, Bonjour,
Starting point is 00:18:16 Bonjour, Bonjour, Bonjour, Bonjour, Bonjour, Bonjour, Bonjour, which means, yeah, I still get out of bed. You know, I was like, I think you just said Fritada, but okay, I'll go with Water Desk, go, go, you're on restaurant. And it says, yeah, but every day I still get out of bed. And she goes, I think you just said Frittata, but okay. I go with order and escargot, your own restaurant. And it says, yeah, but everyday I still get out of bed. And she goes, I love that because what it means is, I'm like, it's pretty self-explanatory.
Starting point is 00:18:32 Yeah. What it means is I'm not fucking Craig, both literally or figuratively. So then over at Craig's Anna shows up and she's like, did you, or did you get drunk and order this gigantic box of beef jerky? and she's like, did you or did you get drunk and order this gigantic box of beef jerky and he's like, oh, I don't think so.
Starting point is 00:18:51 Did you? She's like, no. He goes, I don't remember that, but you know, and then he's like rooting through it and he's like, look, and like holds up like three sticks of it. What's not even beef jerky, it's that, what's it called? It's jerky, isn't it? It's jerky, but it's like not, it's like the,
Starting point is 00:19:09 what do you call it, the ones that are like the sticks, the sticks of jerky. Beak jerky. You know what I'm talking, it's a brand, I'm like, really? I don't know. It doesn't even matter. So Craig's like, I don't remember,
Starting point is 00:19:21 but I guess I'll keep it. Okay, we've gotten a meeting with the accountant at nine. And W9, we have to fill out and he goes, what's that? She goes, you're W9. Yeah, she points the piece of paper. Oh, it all makes sense now. So Craig's like, well, when I was in the Bahamas, I had a lot of time to think about the business opportunity
Starting point is 00:19:44 that Patricia made for me. And, you know, I don't have any more excuses, but there's a problem because we can only make 10 pillows a week and like basically you can't accept orders anymore. Yeah, sorry. It's like basically we can't accept orders anymore until we figure out how to make pillows fast. The complex art of a square pillow. Meanwhile, people on the project runway have three hours to make a hot kuchor dress and he's trying to figure out how to send two pieces of fabric through a sewing machine and put some filling inside. And it's like, oh, and don't forget that skype meeting. And he goes about the pillow business. Is that today? You can do it Craig.
Starting point is 00:20:31 You can do it honey. So chef goes to meet Danny for lunch. I mean, Jesus Christ chef. Good lord. It's like, can we have any more massage on this show? We all thought we were getting rid of the biggest massage in this show when Thomas Thomas left. And Chef is just really coming in to take, you know, fill in the space, fill in the gaps. It's Charleston. There will always be massage knee down there. So, uh, Chef is meeting with Danny
Starting point is 00:20:56 at home team. And, uh, she's like, Chef, I just ordered a game changer and I haven't had one in three years. He's like, gosh, with a floater, gosh, I'll just have a pilsner, gosh, I'll just have a burger. I'm like, Chef, please stop rhyming. Please stop rhyming. It's like, want to split a burger? Okay, we're gonna just split a burger, but with no lettuce and tomato. Or she's like, I want lettuce and tomato.
Starting point is 00:21:21 Okay, we'll just put it on the side for that thing. And he's like, do you want tater tots on the side or mac and cheese because we love tater tots She's like what if I wanted mac and cheese he goes um, I'm driving the bus honey She's like Fine tater tots you better also be paying for the bus honey. Yeah, yeah, okay So this are gossiping is talking about Austin, and Danny's like, I mean, how the fuck are they still together? Am I right, everyone?
Starting point is 00:21:49 I mean, like, if my boyfriend had done that to me and chips like, Garsh, but what about her? I mean, she cheated on him, and she's like, after. He had a threesome. And he's like, well, sometimes good guys have threesome's triple garsh. If I was there, it would be a four-some, quadruple gars. And then they get a triple burger.
Starting point is 00:22:11 Does anybody in that town live fast like 40? I don't, I don't think so. I know that we, I definitely felt like I added 40 pounds, just in like the three days that we were there for. But real, what I'm not the food police, obviously. I'm a big guy. I'm not like sitting here policing food, but even I'm like, that is a lot of saturated fat. I know.
Starting point is 00:22:31 I also want to know what a game changer is. I feel like I've heard of it. Maybe I've even had it, but I don't think I have it. Whatever it was that Danny drank, it looked delicious. And I really find it. Whatever symbolizes a woman getting the vote. So, Chef's like, so tell me about this young glad gentry. And she's like, um, he's hot.
Starting point is 00:22:48 Yeah. Like, is he taller than me? No. Damn it. Is he funnier than me? Oh, damn it. Well, at least I'm taller. I guess I'm taller, right?
Starting point is 00:23:00 He's like, so what's the next step in your relationship? So this is what I hate. You know, as a woman, people make me define my relationship. I'm like, guys, this is what you asked Shep all the time. I know. I mean, including... It's like raging massagerness, but still. Yeah, including right now, when Danny starts asking Shep about Katie,
Starting point is 00:23:16 and he's like, who's that? You know, the girl that you've been seen with? Oh, yeah, and then we see like a flashback, and you see Shep with the girl that he was like showering with and it says Shepp's girlfriend of the week below her. Yeah, girlfriend of a week I think. Oh, a week. Oh, I thought it's a girlfriend of the week. Because he's like, I have a girlfriend. And it shows his girlfriend of one week. In a way, it's so shady in the editors. So funny. And he's like, you know, I'm just nervous because I really just want to be alone. you need to stop sabotaging yourself okay you
Starting point is 00:23:49 just don't want to be vulnerable like awesome you would like the I watched bachelor so they can't pronounce vulnerable you very well with you girl she's like you're being a coward and he goes oh no I've been her before the year was 1997 the Spice Girls were all the rage. And they were seeing a song called, If You Want To Be My Lover. And it inspired my then girlfriend of three days to be empowered enough to leave me
Starting point is 00:24:13 and I've never been with a girl ever since. Mm, it really hurt. And Danny is like, that's why you're not in a relationship. Mm-hmm. And he's like, you know what, I'm so hungry. It turns out I don't like Tater tots. She goes, dammit, I want him back in cheese. He's like, well, we'll just take him
Starting point is 00:24:30 and give him to like a homeless person. She cramches. And he goes, are there homeless people anywhere? She's like, no. She's like, I cannot believe I'm being seen on national television with this guy. And that like he's done no work his entire life and will still be 10
Starting point is 00:24:45 times richer than I am by the time he's not he dies. Which will probably be at like three years based on that she's burger. So then we go over to Chelsea's new house and she's with her interior designer Kim who if you are a survivor super fan like I am you might recognize Kim as the woman who won the season that Chelsea was on. So I was really excited about that because Kim was like a superwoman. Like she did, she just like, she just like walked to that million dollars. She just like, effortlessly was awesome. So like, of course she comes in and does like an amazing job with Chelsea's house. Of course, Kim would do that? Yeah. And she's brought her all these new things for the house,
Starting point is 00:25:25 like a purple orange vase and a little bird statue or something. And basically, they're just talking about how Chelsea's so nervous. And she did this whole house herself, like she flipped this house or renovated it rather because she's not selling it. But she renovated the city, little house. And it looks really good. Looks amazing. Like so so good. And then Chelsea starts talking about this guy Nick who she's been dating and he she met him up in a Newport Rhode Island randomly enough because he's a professional sailor and she's like yeah I'll follow him a go I keep making her bread it for some reason.
Starting point is 00:26:03 I'll follow me in me. I'll just make it. I don't know why I have this weird block against Chelsea that when I'm at home and I'm like practicing her accent against the TV, I do like a perfect Chelsea, but then when we get on the podcast, I like Turner and to some weird British Australian. I'm going to point with a man who I found the father of the bad who drives a truck. There we go.
Starting point is 00:26:28 The last to deal. And I found that sexy. Like everything he said is disgusting, except the truck part. Yeah, the dip part is really not that appetizing I have to say. Well, I mean, I like chips and dip, so I'm forgiving that one.
Starting point is 00:26:44 Well, but it's a little different. It's a little different type of dip. Well, I mean, I like chips and dips, so I'm forgiving that one. Well, but it's a little different. It's a little different type of dip. Yeah, gross. Gross. So then we go over to our hotel where we say, I know. I was like, oh my god, that's where we were.
Starting point is 00:26:54 And I was like, where wretch? Yes, they're eating there on Southern China. So I went up to the rooftop grill for lunch, which we never did. I'm so lazy. I was like, that's another another elevator I don't want to go to it it was also cold out okay so we're like um no actually that's not true remember I went out there for drinks with a bunch of people from the show and you went to bed oh yeah yeah that was
Starting point is 00:27:14 actually a really nice place I forgot I was so full from dinner that I like could not move and I just like I actually I didn't even go to bed I just laid on the the bed for an hour and a half or two hours Like in the corpse pose like oh my god. I have to digest Charleston right now Like I have to get through my system. Oh, that was a lot of eating So anyway, the camera arrives and then she's meeting Naomi and Who else Danny? Yeah, and they're just basically like hi girl hi girl Hi girl hi girl girl hi girl
Starting point is 00:27:48 And cameras like so house has the boyfriend and am was like well, you know You can't really come anywhere with me because he's always on call and can't like being a call girls My own the girl yeah, hi girl. I'm like hi girl. I'll just saw you but I anyway And then Danny by the way has just gone to spray tan and now he's like spray tan smells so The camera goes bad. She's no distinct so bad. Yeah bad Damn, he's like thanks guys just all chef. He made me feel great to you So she's like you're smelling chef right now not spray tan Yeah, I'm just on the ship on my way out. Yeah, I was within 10 feet of
Starting point is 00:28:27 chef. So I apologize for the scent. So cameras like, uh, guess you I was emailing with and Danny says, G, that's what I call them. That's your boyfriend. Yeah. Gentry. So basically, uh, Danny and Gentry went over to Catherine's
Starting point is 00:28:41 house to check it out. And we saw this really weird flashback where they were, they were there there and then Gentry was like, all right, now let's go upstairs. He helped himself. So I think he's the real estate guy. Well, that's what I was wondering. Is he the real estate guy or not?
Starting point is 00:28:54 I was so confused. Yeah, that's what I call him. He showed us Catherine's new house. So I think she started dating the real estate guy that showed him. That makes more sense in the house. Yeah, because he was talking with such authority. I was like, excuse me, sir, this is not your house. And for a moment, it's just a man in Charleston.
Starting point is 00:29:10 He comes over and he's like, yeah, this is the closet. It's roomy, it's spacey, it's calm down. I mean, honestly, based on what we've seen on this show, it seems totally like a viable explanation. Charleston man. Yeah, Danny's dating the realtor who showed the house. And just to re-emphasize, he is so hot. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:29:31 I mean, quite blonde guy. I mean, he's hot in a way that looks like he's up to dangerous things. Like he's lifetime TV movie hot, you know? Yeah. So Cameron's like, is she buying it or renting it? And then she looks it up because she's renting it obviously. She's like $6,600. Like does she understand that's putting money in the toilet? Talk her down. Talk get a better prize. They're like, it's too late.
Starting point is 00:29:58 Daddy's like, don't worry. She's young. She's 27. She's got the rest of her life to be on a reality show. Yeah. In Alamoney. Like no. She's got the rest of her life to be on a reality show. Yeah. Get Alamoney. Cameron's so excited to have something to be judgey-bout again. She's just so thrilled, you know? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:30:13 Cameron's like, now, y'all, did you see that Ashley got an award for being like outstanding nurse of the year? Something like that? They're like, what? And so they look at this video. We're actually one something, like one, like, nurse of the year from, I don't know, who bestank you in the first day.
Starting point is 00:30:30 Hello nurses, yeah, Paulo nurses who bestank. Yeah, Paulo nurses who bestank you in the first day. And she's like up there receiving this award. And she's like, what I was 16 years old, I discovered my calling. I wanted to be a nurse and I wanted to be what those nurses were for me. The day my father died and was like, okay. And she's like, okay, Chelsea. Chelsea. Chelsea. Take a good look at this award because it's gonna be in your life for
Starting point is 00:31:02 the rest of your days. This award is just a trophy award and I thank you for it. So, Danny's like, is this a joke and then Kim goes, well, y'all, if she's getting award for altruism or something, she can't be 100% bad, right? Danny's like, um, yeah, she's 100% evil, I'm telling you. She's like, yeah, but I'm thinking like, you know, maybe if we met her before all this, you don't think she'd be different.
Starting point is 00:31:28 I think I'm gonna text her and congratulate her and they're like, what? What? They lose their mind. I really would like to know where Ashley got that award from. I really need to know because I'm on like a research kick right now. I just earlier today I did some research into Dr. John Sessa from Real House as a Beverly Hills to find out.
Starting point is 00:31:52 I'll definitely find out. Well, because, you know, I feel like I've been hearing different things like, oh, he didn't go on a credited institution, et cetera, et cetera. So first of all, our friend Heather, she said she told us on Twitter that he has a doctor in like doctorate and business management. So it's like, okay, that's not okay. Fine, it's not like he is a doctorate. Not like a whatever sort of doctorate we were expecting, it's not what he has.
Starting point is 00:32:18 And then I looked at his bio on the Vancompe Dogs website. He got his doctorate from, Argosi University. So I looked up that. So Argosi University is like a for-profit university, like it's like a network of university, like colleges and universities or whatever. And there's like some, I didn't read it all of it because the Wikipedia page was long.
Starting point is 00:32:40 But there's like all sorts of sketchiness in terms of like how they use their money, et cetera, like think like Trump University kind of stuff. and basically it closed down this year in February because of It was like ordered to close down because it was like it's like bullshit. It's like a bullshit place So I'm totally shocked. Yeah totally shocked. So that's John Cessna's background Dr. John Cessna's background and I would not be surprised if If our dear Ashley also got her Nursing degree or her award at least from our go sees Someone on the reddit you never read it always always a good one to check
Starting point is 00:33:14 I just checked reddit and it says I googled it and it looks like this is a company award ceremony So I mean, I guess you could win an award the same way my company will announce top performers every month, but that's not exactly prestigious. Yeah. Well, I don't know everybody. Here's what I know Ashley won something. So yay! In this congeniality, I'm sure. It's time for commercial. It's time for a crap and it's commercial. Celebrity beef. You never know if you're just gonna end up on TMZ or trending on Twitter or in court.
Starting point is 00:33:47 I'm Matt Bellasife And I'm Sydney Battle, and we're the host of Wonder E's new podcast, Dis and Tell. Each episode explores a different iconic celebrity feud, from the build-up, why it happened, and the repercussions. What does our obsession with these feud say about us? We're starting off with a pretty messy love triangle between Selena Gomez and Justin and Haley Bieber, a seemingly innocent TikTok of Selena talking about her laminated eyebrows. It's snowballed into a full-blown alleged feud.
Starting point is 00:34:18 But it doesn't seem like fans are letting up anytime soon. Despite both Selena and the Bieber's making public statements denying any bad blood. How much of this is teen jealousy and lovers quarreling, and how much of it is a carefully crafted narrative designed to sell albums? Follow this and tell wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen ad-free on the Amazon music or wonder ya. So now back to Chelsea's house. She's preparing for her housewarming party and She's really what she's with her friend and what's her friend's name again?
Starting point is 00:34:51 I missed it and I was too lazy to go back, but we've seen her before. She sort of looks like Mariah Carey But like like a short little Mariah Carey Okay, I don't care. So she's like I really hope this party size pretty time. Hey my Chelsea's back So she's like, I really hope this party size pretty time. Hey, my Chelsea's back. Woo! Yeah, there you go. Yay. Which I thought was funny because she's like,
Starting point is 00:35:09 I want this party to stay tame. And then as we then watch like six kegs get rolled into her living room and like beer, that's like at the cooler. And like, if you wanted to be pretty tame, maybe you should stick with some like wine coolers and like. I know, it's like kegs and coolers all over her brand new hardwood For that you gonna put that stuff on the patio. Yeah, why was that inside Chelsea?
Starting point is 00:35:29 Yeah, those bizarre sex who we put it down Should we should we put some plastic wrap around all right little little friend come here Come here little friend just lay on the grab we're gonna put these cakes on you know my dear Do we need a do we need a designated area where shape's gonna see, we can put a towel down. I was like, no, why don't I love Chelsea so much this season? So then Cameron comes and we get to see the house. And it is really.
Starting point is 00:35:57 Wow, so. I'm so jealous. I'm so jealous. I know. And then Chelsea's like, this is sort of like on the heels of her saying like, I like a man who can has a drop of truck and has looks deep and likes to go hunting and stuff like that.
Starting point is 00:36:12 And then here's my portrait. I can see it listen to NPR. I'm like, wait, what? So Cameron's like, let's take a shot girls. I'm still he up. Yeah, but a baby shot. So they take a shot and then everybody starts coming over. Catherine and Caroline come over and
Starting point is 00:36:29 just every other Chelsea. So much shit, I don't need to write down here. I wrote in everything. I was like, there's someone named Susan who's wearing a scarf. And then Naomi is like, Naomi comes in and she brings like a bottle of champagne or something.
Starting point is 00:36:43 She's like, I brought you this. Someone gifted to me last week. So whatever you take it, I hate it. So even the kid from the surf, by the way, even the kid from the surf shop last week got invited. I was like, really? Yeah, probably bros. Yeah, probably.
Starting point is 00:36:59 They're surfing bros, bros, surfing community. And Charles did. I mean, come on. Like, oh Charleston. I mean, come on. Like, oh, rack. So Madison and Austin come in. And did you catch the slight stink face Austin gave the house? Yeah, he's not used to clean spaces.
Starting point is 00:37:15 So he is that I'm an I smell disgusting. So he sees all this beer, by the way, has been provided by something called Island beer, some brand, probably local, and Austin sees it. He's like, this is so embarrassing. I mean, she has to use another beer handle and it's not mine. It's just totally embarrassing. I can't believe this. I mean, it's insane.
Starting point is 00:37:37 I feel like I'm having another little tiff with her right now. Yeah. And he's like, oh, yeah, it's really too bad, Chelsea, you can use mine. She goes, I tried. You're my first big. And it's like, oh, things kind of got like hit a snag. I got hit with cost difficulties. And did I put my beer on my beer business on the back burner? I'm just looking my mouth a lot for this. You can't see. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:38:07 I guess I did. He was probably dead. I'm just really embarrassed, which, not I feel bad for making fun of him about it, you know, because no one likes going through the trauma of realizing that their parents' bank account has an end. I know. But also at the same time, he doesn't even know if he's put his business on the back burner, which makes me wonder if it ever made it to the front burner in the first place.
Starting point is 00:38:25 I think that's just me. That's his way of saying he's waiting for his mom to start returning his calls again. Yeah, that's like, I think he thought he was gonna get a lot of like, free shit, or you know, I think he's gonna be like, yo, look, I can't afford this right now, but we're gonna promote it heavily on Southern Charm
Starting point is 00:38:42 and you're just gonna get all your money back. Everyone's like, no, no. No, no. back and everyone's like, no, no, no. And then she's like, yeah, I'm embarrassed. And it cuts the camera and who's doing that face, she's going, her face is basically saying like, what a cut of shit, uh, hmm. I love when she just, she literally does that emoji of teeth clenching. Yeah. So that face, so that's a step arise, but he starts wandering to the wrong house.
Starting point is 00:39:07 And then he like yells clearly a production like, gosh, which house is it? I mean, how many house am I supposed to go to? What am I a girl on a bike late at night? So he comes in and everybody's directly on him. Cameron's like, so I thought you were bringing someone. He's like, oh, gosh. I got dumped. Up. Just me solo again. Just like, okay, well, we'll fix you a
Starting point is 00:39:31 plate and go outside. See how I did that. All right, everyone, we're going to play a game called Hammer or Nail. See, there's a stump in the middle here. Everyone has a nail and you got to take this hammer. You got to hit your nail. And if you hit your nail, that it's awesome. But if you don't, your nail, you gotta drink. Anyway, NPR and dip afterwards. Yeah. It's just Chelsea tricking them all into doing home renovations for her. And now, wait a minute.
Starting point is 00:39:58 You call this game shingles and what you have to do is you touch shingles to the house. And whoever gets the most shingles done first gets a big hug for me. All right. This is called Weeple. All right, you start pulling on the weed and if you get it out and when shot, you don't have to take a drink, but if it takes more than one shot, you have to take two drinks, go. So inside the guys are talking, chefs talking to Craig and Austin and he's like, you won't believe what happened last night. I hate watching the guys on these shows.
Starting point is 00:40:27 It's like, maybe I'll ever see all these shows. It's disgusting. I know. He's like, oh, I, you won't believe what happened last night. I'm single now. So I bring this young lady home. Oh, I see you rebounded quickly. And we go on bikes and I lost her.
Starting point is 00:40:43 I lost her. Craig's like, how do you lose someone on a bike? I'm like, I'm not sure, but you're also the one who got lost on that island and had to like dig a hole in the beach to survive the night. Yeah, but at least he stayed with Catherine. He did a fever alone. And I was like, dude, you have to think of someone
Starting point is 00:41:03 besides your fucking self, especially the beach. Which whatever that means. Garsh. So, yeah, Shep has like walked into the water. You know how dumb girls are? Yeah, you know girls, they don't know how to think for themselves. They hit water, they just keep walking. Ah, do you like girls do whatever they want? Next thing you know, they're ordering mac and cheese, is aside with the triple-tank cheese So chef is like gosh, I mean I went home and and like I went looking for her and I look everywhere and then I see this girl Seven houses down. She she wrote her bike into a ditch
Starting point is 00:41:36 I was like oh gosh are you okay? You dumb girl. Oh girls are so dumb Greg goes so she wrote her bike into a ditch and you just kept driving seven houses down telling stories to yourself. No! Yeah, that's exactly what happened. If Craig can read you, that's a bad sign. When Craig is a responsible mature bun here.
Starting point is 00:42:00 Yeah. She was like, I was looking for her everywhere. I mean, I didn't start looking for another 90 minutes. I realized she was gone, but I didn't look to everywhere. So then outside Chelsea's got more games. So you ever played these back? All right, take this mop and start turning around the circles. You ever play broom and stuff?
Starting point is 00:42:20 We just take a broom and you sweep left and right and put all the dust into a dust pan and put in the trash river does the fastest wins This is called hands on a hard body now you put some wax on these sponges just keep going around and around first one to remove their hands loses Hi, you ever hear of a paint bucket in house walls what you do is you put this this brush and the paint and you paint a wall and it paint as fast as possible Whoever paints a wall for fastest wins a special thing from me to be D. So Insight Danny gets on shop. She's like, so when she's supposed to have girl here and he's like, oh, gosh, she don't mean because she saw a picture of me and some girl on the
Starting point is 00:42:57 couches. I mean, look, I told her I like couches, but I went home alone. I told her I like how Jews, but I went home alone, gosh! Yeah, they're all like, okay, fucking the chef. So then it's like more party time and Chelsea's like, people are spilling shit and Chelsea's like constantly cleaning up because she has like six kegs in her living room for no good reason. And then her friend just goes up to the chef and just like flings and napping in his face. He's like, gosh, what is that? What's that crazy small tiny handshaped hand-size blanket? It's a napkin Shep, please use it. Don't try and get that liquid cancer near me again either. It's like anti-bacterial wipes for your hand. So Catherine's like, so girls, tell me the gossip.
Starting point is 00:43:43 like, so girls, tell me the gossip. And they're like, what gossip? They're like, tell me, oh, okay, it's what you want to tell gossip to you. I'm dying to tell you, but I promised I wouldn't. Cameron's like, am I supposed to say it? Do you want me to just say it? Our little darling Catherine here and our little friend Whitney had a little rendezvous.
Starting point is 00:44:01 And they're like, yeah, yeah. Yeah. And then Catherine has like a moment where I got I guess it's supposed to be empowering where she's like Um the first time that Whitney and I had sex like he told me not to tell anyone But then he went and told everyone anyway, and I was lying for him. So this time I'm like oh I'm gonna say it. I'm like, okay, you go girl, maybe There she goes. I mean now I don't give a shit and Whitney if I were him I'd be like yeah, man I sure did a boom This is exactly right. Why is Whitney the embarrassed one? I mean Jesus Christ. Yeah, so
Starting point is 00:44:43 Like so how was it? How was it sleeping with Whitney? And she's like, um, it wasn't bad. They're like, real, what? And Naomi is just dying. She's like, I cannot. And she's like, well, you know, there's just so much stuff between them.
Starting point is 00:44:59 And then she see the clips of Catherine screaming at him. Like, you were with him in a strip club, Motherfucker! Yeah, well, it's whatever Catherine speaks about this level. You know that, like, the walls are about to start crumbling. Yeah, exactly. And now, Naomi's like, God, like, maybe Craig was right about when you sort of being in love with Catherine
Starting point is 00:45:17 and being upset that she was with Tom as like a week after the hook job. Like, as much as it pains me to ever give credit to Craig for anything in life, I might just have to do this now and throw myself up up here. Yeah, Craig doesn't lie. Craig's usually right, unless he's saying
Starting point is 00:45:34 that he was just lost and dug himself a hole to sleep in all night. Craig actually specifically does lie quite a bit. I think that's one of the things you talked about, let's see what you have. Well, I'm about other people. He lies about himself, but whenever he's confronting the guys with their shit, it's usually not found out to be a lie.
Starting point is 00:45:51 You know what I mean? Yeah. And so then they're like, well, so how do we ask him to tell you? Is he an astronaut? No. You know, other stuff he lies about. Yeah. So they're like, hey, so how does Austin and Chelsea know about this then?
Starting point is 00:46:02 And Catherine's like, um, like you told them, oh my, and then Cameron's like, what is going to kill you when Catherine goes, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, Yeah, I just are So I got an old car coming to life So Austin and Craig and Whitney meet up for lunch and Austin sees Whitney in his north face vest and he's like What's up McFly looks like you went overboard He's like You look like you just went squirrel you just want squirrel haunting, burn. What do you want?
Starting point is 00:46:47 Squirrels, squirrel. Whitney and mother vote Whitney. What do you vote Austin? So then Craig joins up and they start ordering beers and of course they don't have Austin's beer. So instead they order a Cooper River. Which is such an asshole. He's like, what do you have on tap?
Starting point is 00:47:06 Oh shit. Sorry, Austin. That was a good one. So say to get, go back and come back. Come back. What do you have on tap? I'm in the show. I never get solved.
Starting point is 00:47:18 We're just going to order some Cooper River now. Just to remind Cooper, he's not on the show anymore. Hey, Chef, we found that homeless person you were looking for With these like what is your what is your peer called and he's like drop off and he goes trap queen Mother sure that I said trap queen It's like the oddest ball-busting session I've ever sat in it oddest and most forced as well But yeah at the same time totally warrant warranted. Because Traphop doesn't, it's weird, it doesn't totally feel like it rolls off the target. It almost feels like Austin, it should be called like Tropical Hopps or something. And Austin, like, you know what,
Starting point is 00:47:54 I'm gonna go ahead and give it its nickname for you. Like, you know what I'm saying? Like, Traphop is what the users would call it. And he's like, I'm gonna give it its own nickname. It's like, when you try to give yourself your own nickname, you're like, no, that's not right. You have to let other people come up with it, you know? Right, like if I was actually born Ronnie instead of Ronald. Yeah, yeah, or like, like if any any nickname that you've ever heard.
Starting point is 00:48:21 Any nickname you've ever heard in your life, you came up with yourself. You're working way too hard for this one. Yeah. I was debating, do I finish this thought process or do I just blow my nose? Yeah. Because they're about the same.
Starting point is 00:48:33 It really doesn't require that much. Yeah, about the same, in terms of quality of podcasts, content. So Whitney's like, you know, they talk about Austin being depressed because you know, he sucks. And then Whitney's like, fill me in they talk about Austin being depressed because you know, he sucks. And then when he's like Filming on the party what I miss and Austin's like, well, man, I want to know What is love? Are you dating anyone because you and Catherine are particularly close these days?
Starting point is 00:48:59 No and Craig just puts his chin on his hand and when he's like fuck you all man Mother fuck off That's crazy fuck him all right mother and then Austin's like yeah, Whitney's not really a label guy and Craig says Yeah, Austin's just trying to force it. Yeah, he's trying to force it. And I was like, you know, I just like the connection I like the connection with Madison. They start talking about Madison now. They're like, why are you with this girl Madison? What's going on? Like, and the producers like pull out that video.
Starting point is 00:49:31 You guys obviously ate each other. Yeah, and the producers pull out that video for like the sixth time this episode. Like, you know, we're going to be watching that video every single episode. Like, awesome. So we had a yogurt today, and then they'll just show the video for no good reason.
Starting point is 00:49:44 This is insane. Madison, you're being insane right now. You're an insane person right now. So then they like, what, I don't know why. Someone said Debbie Downer. Someone reference Debbie Downer. I don't know why, I don't remember. Like his Greg goes, I mean, we're not really trying to be Debbie Downer's and Whitney goes,
Starting point is 00:50:01 who is Debbie Downer? Who is Debbie anyway? Yeah, why don't they call me Debbie Downer? Rachel Dratch is so mad somewhere. I know, and Craig goes, apparently, there's some girl named Debbie somewhere that really sucked one time. He's true.
Starting point is 00:50:18 So now we go over to Cameron's house and Shep's gonna come over. And so she goes out to her doc, she's a little acute doc at the back of her house. I'm just gonna check the crab track. Check the crab trap, which could also be the name of this show. Check the crab trap. She's like Shep's the bad.
Starting point is 00:50:34 Yeah, it's all like, it's just slang for Shep's coming over. I'm gonna check the crab trap. Oh, so when's he arriving? So he comes over and she's like, Well, I gotta see if there's any crabs because that's gonna be dinner. So they pull up this trap and Shep starts like going in with his bare hands. She's like, SHAPEARD! No, you can't go with your bare hands! It's a crab! It's gonna pitchers like, Gorsh! I know what I'm doing! They're very simple. They're like, women, okay, I'm just gonna go in there.
Starting point is 00:51:00 And he goes, he pulls out the crab and of course, he pinches him. He's like, oh, oh, gosh. Oh, gosh, gosh, he pinched me. Why did the crap pinch me? Can we go? I've never seen anyone breach their hand into a trap. You are truly a moron. Hey, mother, is it a trap queen?
Starting point is 00:51:21 Get a mother? Call back. So they throw the crab back in and he's like, Oh, he reminded me of me, defiant, brave. Kind of drawn to the shower. You watched that crap, but some do you know what I'm not? Wow, sort of unnecessary, but it really spoke to me. So cameras like, okay, let's talk about last night again.
Starting point is 00:51:41 So she's like, Oh my God, Catherine and Whitney almost fell out of my chair. Were you surprised? She's like, no, I wouldn't surprise. He's a dog who just wants a bone. And Shep's like, so is she. What is Shep? Shep is like so eager to equate every woman's deeds with a man's deeds. So interesting.
Starting point is 00:52:04 It's because it's usually the other way. It's like, why is a woman the one taking all the shit when the men are just as bad? And this time, it's opposite state of a shop. He's like, wait a minute. Why do the girls get away with everything? Yeah, girls just get away with everything, Chef. Yeah, so Cameron's like, you know,
Starting point is 00:52:21 what happened? What would happen if Catherine got pregnant with Whitney's child? And then now she, that Patricia would finally have the grand baby she wants so badly. And she's like, that would be so perverse and wonderful. Gosh. Yeah. And he goes, he goes, I wonder if the conversation, I wonder what the conversation they had after the sweat dried. Like, don't tell anybody. I don't think he would have done it if she and the mom hadn't become buzzed, like, oh, mother approves. Like those are evil fingers.
Starting point is 00:52:52 Yeah, so then they started talking about Madison and apparently Madison walked up to Shep after like everyone was leaving, aka cameras, and she basically asked Shep, like, what's your problem with me? And I told her exactly how I felt I don't feel like you watch Austin but you're not enough and that's not supportive to a man gosh hmm so what's the difference I mean they did the same thing to each other where are you so
Starting point is 00:53:15 mad at her and he's like no the person to do it to cheat out of revenge is more culpable in my opinion and she's like you are so sexist. He said, oh, no, I would say about it. The man if he did it, you know, it's about sex, but it's not about sexist. Oh, yeah. He basically feels like if you cheat and decide to stay together, it doesn't mean that then you get to cheat like as or to even the playing field. And if you do, I'd hope you be discreet because everyone in town knew and it made my friend Austin look like a clown Garsh. That was the that was the aspect that actually really bothered me the most because there's been nothing about the guys on this show and their sexual activities that has been even close to the screen. It's just like everywhere and
Starting point is 00:53:57 it's blatant. And why is it that like she has to be discreet? Whereas all the guys can just like flaunt their shit around. That's what we're talking about. And also the biggest hypocritical part to me is that has to be discreet, whereas all the guys can just like flaunt their shit around. That's what really taught me. And also, the biggest hypocritical part to me is that, uh, Shep is always trying to make his friends look like clowns. Like he goes out of his way, he gets so jealous of them. He's always trying to make them look stupid so he can get the stupid girl what she never does.
Starting point is 00:54:18 Plus it's also not fair because, you know, Austin already looks like Fuzzy Bear. So he's already like a mop it. So to call him a clown, I mean he like we know what he is We know what he is And camera's just like sticking her finger into like the middle of her eyes like Can't take that she's like begging for the crab to come back so she could just stick it on her face And that brings us to the end of southern zone A fun fun time everyone. I hope you have a wonderful Memorial Day weekend
Starting point is 00:54:45 Stay safe out there and have a great time. And be sure to come see us in two weeks in Milwaukee. We're gonna have a great, great, great time there. We don't know what we're covering just yet, but it doesn't really matter what we cover, because we're all gonna bond as one big, happy audience family. Yeah, everybody, we'll talk to you later.
Starting point is 00:55:01 Bye. Bye. Bye. Hey, prime members, you can listen to WaterCrapins Add Free on Amazon Music, download the Amazon Music app today. Or you can listen Add Free with Wondry Plus in Apple Podcasts before you go tell us about yourself by completing a short survey at Wondry.com slash survey. You can listen ad-free with Wondry Plus and Apple Podcasts. Before you go tell us about yourself by completing a short survey at Wondry.com slash survey.

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