Watch What Crappens - SouthernCharm: Shep Shifter

Episode Date: October 31, 2020

Southern Charm is back with a slew of casting changes and one or two unpleasant surprises. Between the asbestos explosions and T-Rav cameos, there's a lot that's hazardous to our health here. But as always, we're happy to make fun of this mess.Don't just listen, watch us. Check out our video recap of the episode here: https://www.patreon.com/posts/43343193Our Patreon Extras: https://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappensSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hey, Prime members, you can listen to Watch What Crapins Add Free on Amazon Music. Download the app today. Get ready for a double load of Queen of Hearts. It's me, Jujubee, and I return to guide sexy singles through some ronchy blind dates. Cameras off. Voice only. Launching during pride. Queen of Hearts takes Miami by storm, with Daeders' Cuppe from Tampa Bayes, Just Chas, and Brittany Brave to name a few. Follow Queen of Hearts on Amazon Music or wherever you get your podcasts. Hello and welcome to Watcher Crappens, a podcast about all that crap we just love to watch on ye old bravo. Happy almost Halloween. I tried to get into a costume because it's crap in his life and all I could find was a prop. It's a low-voil and low-oil and drinky poo thing.

And joining me on this Halloween day is the one and the only very furry and adorable. Ronnie Caram! What's going on Ronnie? Hi. Hi, you got little bunny ears on which is adorable. I got love Island, love islands. It's beautiful. This is actually given to me by, she's not a sheela, she's a daniella.

So here's the home representing. I'm just like a love oil contestant, okay? It's the early days in this podcast and I just I just was wondering if I could pull you for it Chuck Ronnie and maybe like we could discuss things and I don't know I just want to get to know you some more I don't know why you would put anything love island based to your lips, but hey you suck It's not what you want to then, okay? Yeah, I will I will thank you. Thank you. I'll judge you out loud I'm sorry. I just don't have I couldn't find any of my Halloween costumes. Wait, I actually I do have some I have some lemons over there

I could be shining the door I don't have anything that I can wear though. I just have props that Halloween guy Yeah, I like that. I think that's a good costume. Hi, I'm a prop Halloween guy You could just be different people every every few minutes. I could be Carl. Well, everybody, it's Halloween time, which means, so one day of the year, everybody is gonna be eating like me for a day. So yay, yay, milky ways for breakfast. Yay, it's a spooky time of the year

and why not do something really spooky like bring Southern Charm back, okay? And that's what we'll be talking about before we get into that though. It is a crap is on demand episode so check us out on patreon patreon.com slash watch for crap is to watch us. And also in case you missed the news earlier this week we are doing a big live show virtually on November 12th to recap the series premiere of the Real Housewives of Salt Lake City. We have booked a special guest and we're not saying who it is. But do you never know when they're gonna cancel on our ass? We learned our lesson with that one. Yeah we don't we never say who our special guests are because we

fully believe that fate will we'll ruin, but we do have a guest. We do have a guest. Go to onlocationlive.com slash watch for crap ins or just go to our website and the link is there to get your tickets. November 12th, 9pm on the east coast, 6pm on the west coast. This could be so fun and you can just chat along while we're doing our show and we'll respond as best we can and you guys can chat with each other. We're going to have a great, great time. We're really excited for our guests.

We think you'll be excited by her as well. So, anyway, I think that's the big news, right? Our show, we got a guest, Patreon. Yeah, we did it. That's it. We did it. Happy Halloween, everyone. See you on Monday.

See you later. We're out of here. So this show is called The Good Shepherd. This episode is called The Good Shepherd, which is really a funny way to bring Southern Charm back because Shacken Olshep is having the Jack storyline of the season of trying to just be a better person, guys. I'm sorry I had a bad year of course. I'm normally such an ice person. So we get his big redemption storyline which I don't know that I

need that, you know, I don't need every movie to be Maleficent. Okay, I love that movie, I love watching Angelina like convince us that the witch is a good guy. I haven't watched both of those films, love them. Chef, you're no Maleficent, okay? You suck, just stay sucking, okay? I don't need to do to try to be a. Chef, you're no Maleficent, okay? You suck. Just stay sucking, okay? I don't need to do to try to be a good person. And you're not a good person just because you're banging one person for more than two weeks, okay? Major is still out for me.

I mean, listen, if I had to choose between chef and jacks, I will always choose chef, right? Like, I think that like, there's no upside to someone like Jacks. I feel like there is upside for someone like Chef, but he's gonna have to do a lot of repair work. You know, it's a great way to make your image look so much better.

It's just bringing T-Rav back. That'll always fix this thing a lot, you know? That helps everybody's image, you know? It's like, God, I didn't do it. I wasn't just remembering anybody. Yeah. He's the worst person ever. Oh, there's T-Rav.

You know, Shep's not so bad. I was thinking about it. It's not so bad. How did Thomas Ravano even get back on this show? What the hell kind of firing was that? It's like you're fired for being an awful person. Oh, no, come back on. Oh, you know what? And bring your white jeans. People love those. Yeah. You know, never, never count out Southern Charmed to put some awful people on our television, but I But that's why I tune in because I need to see the awful people so I can make fun of them, okay? And you know I don't know that I need Thomas Ravamel

Okay, it's like Halloween and here comes Thomas Ravamel's penis with the same costume It's always wearing looking like a moose knuckle. Okay. I don't need your penises, Halloween costume, Thomas. Okay, get your nuts off the floor. Like congratulations on having a big one. It doesn't count when you're sick, see, okay? Like your blood vessels have just given up.

I think it's the stuff of your pant, your balls are coming out of them. Stop. I think it's a great tactic to get people to vote. I think it was like, if you haven't voted yet, here's a reminder why you need to vote on Tuesday. Thomas Ravenel, okay? And that's that. So I think it's actually, I think it was a great service. Yeah, Biden and Harris are four men in their 60s wearing underwear with their white jeans,

okay? That's all you need to know. I get the polls. You know, it's shockingly if you go back to the back catalog, you could probably hear me endorsing Thomas Ravenel when. I get to the polls. You know, it's shockingly if you go back to the back catalog, you could probably hear me endorsing Thomas Ravenel when he was running for the Senate. Because I like the idea of like this crazy outsider who's like, listen, New York, he was like, he went to jail, he had a Coke problem. Like he could be someone who's like, real.

I'm like, I've learned my lesson. I've learned my lesson. And thank God he did not win back then. Oh God, remember that ad they did? Oh this show. Oh geez. Well let's dive into this. Boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, it's more like, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom,

it is very, it's like, please get COVID. he's got no taste buds He's got salope breathing And he's and he's not wearing a mask Which mask Wear your mask on your face on on over your nose and over your mouth? Yeah, we're at that stage in Bravo where we're having to see this shit now, you know, like we're all living it. I'm still stuck in my damn house, okay?

I know everybody is like in different stages of reopening or whatever, but who knows when you're actually listening to this podcast, but the world is like second wave, world It's still really bad and now bravo is run out of things and so we're watching people shoot during COVID and I don't know I like things that were shot like I don't care if it was shot 10 years ago like real housewives of Potomac You know, I mean they're talking about the latest episode of friends on that show and I'm fine with it Yeah, I'm fine with it because it's fine with it. Cause it's too real. It's in their mask. Yeah, it is too real. But I don't know.

I'm holding out hope because I actually think that watching Craig comprehend the pandemic could actually be very funny television. So speaking of which, the very first thing we see is Craig coughing. I'd be like, yeah, I'm just reading about this crazy stuff. It's like, Craig, I'm just reading about this crazy stuff. It's like, Greg, you have it.

Yeah, and then is he talking to the new guy? Because there's some guy with beard that he's talking to. I just said beard. I said beard saying, this is fucking my world. Yeah, I put computer with beard guy, which actually makes no sense, but I understood it. I was like, yeah, this thing's fucking weird, man. He's fucking with my world, man.

I was like, oh no. Well, congratulations. Glad you guys found another drunk to be on this show. Calling it out, this guy's wife left him because he's a drunk. Now, do I know that? I don't, so don't sue me, anybody. It's just my guess from looking at you, okay?

I can smell you through my TV. Get a beard comb. He has a beard and he moved to Charl, I mean, to Charleston. He's drunk. So, he's comb. He has a beard and he moved to Charleston. He's drunk. So he's drunk. He's drunk. That guy looks like he has peanut-shut, like peanut skins.

You know that when you eat a peanut and the little brown skin comes off, you know he just gets that shit in his beard. He is literally named after a snack. Okay, how is he not a drunk? Okay, his last name is Pringle. Okay. So are you from the Pringle family?

The great Pringle family who owns the pop house over there? Are you familiar with Bernie's Dorito? So, so then we go see Austin saying, I'm- Oh those pop chips are just new, though. Help in your family doesn't invite them anywhere. People say that we're not a very diverse town, but perhaps you haven't met Manuela Tortilla.

So, the Tostito family is always so festive. So, Austin is like, I mean, I'm watching the news and it's kind of making me depressed. I'm like, how do you think we feel watching you, Austin? How depressed have we been watching you for all these years? Look at this guy doing nothing, walk around his boat, his boxers grabbing his boner, launching Trap Hop and just failing upwards. How do you think that makes us feel?

Okay. You have been our pandemic all this time. Yeah, the pandemic where your mouth never stops moving even after you finish the sentence. Madison, come on, Madison. So chef, I'm sure you haven't been exposed. Oh, gosh.

And then boom, the worst thing to happen to Charleston in decades the city park is a a scene Madison that's insane the closest city park then we go over to Patricia's house and uh... she's waving one of those ones over a package to a team down the same member basically

yeah a mich Michael's like, man, if you miss him, you'll miss some of the possible contagions. And she's like, I've dealt with plenty of germs. My ability to adapt to germs paid for this house, Michael. All right. All right. Garry, some of my friends have tested positive.

Not Craig, he doesn't know how to take a test. Yeah. So then Craig is on the phone with Catherine. And he's like, Chef set two of his friends tested positive. It's like, what else is new? When have you not been on the phone with Chef? And he's like, hey, two of my friends tested positive.

I mean, you could be in any part of time, and that's something that Chef could have said on the phone. I know, it could have really been about so many different things. And then, uh, Leva, Leva, not Leva, right? Leva? Leva, Leva, Leva. Leva, who's been around a while.

Now she's finally getting her moment. She's worried about her business and her city. And then, um, then you see Shep with Danny and he goes, she tests a positive. And Danny goes, she testing positive. Yes! You could hear me if I just opened this door. She tested positive and Danny goes she tested positive yes You could hear me if I just open this door you are not opening that door keep that shut you giving me enough you fuck I mean you didn't give me anything. Okay, he might give me anything Poor Danny. She is like just wanted to move forward in a season without medical diagnoses and

Any discussion about positive or negative. She just is like, less closely the medical testing to lassies and I was like, coronavirus, do you have it? Do you have it, Danny? I heard you have it. Do you have it? You have it? She's like, no! Please let it be a storyline that shep gives Danny coronavirus. Or gets coronavirus glimidia. Coronavirus glimidia. Samaritan virus winds up worse for where after it comes on the show. I was like, oh, finally, coronavirus is taking down by a bunch of male horse in a bar.

And then we have Madison and Austin on zoom. And she's like, you, you, you go out all night. Nah, Matt, man, you fucking idiot. You're not stepping foot in this house till I know you're not gonna just get in, you can come on over, come on over, big guy. And then we hear, mm-hmm. And I like that the music lady was so into that.

She's like, yes, Madison, you go, mm-hmm. Six months earlier, horn music. Ba, ba, ba, ba, ba. I love the orchestra is out of control in this. earlier horn music. Bapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapap This girl's like doing things across. I know. I'm like, I'm like, uh, he got some yogurt out of the fridge, guys. So we see a bottle of wine on the floor. We see a cheese board that clearly has been out for several days. And guess what? It's Craig in the bathroom. So his former life of being in an adult house is gone. Um, or is it, maybe it's just temporarily gone? Yeah. And um, he's hoping the blinds and he's a Austin's house. He's like get up sleepy boy And by the way this cast has so much coke available

Our law enforcement even doing it everyone all the guys on this cast are like hey Well, we had when you were in Charleston our Uber driver was like a police officer, remember? And so maybe that's what the issue is. That's the driver with their second child. He had some choice words for Thomas Ravenel, by the way. So now we see Madison driving with her son Hudson. I love that. It feels like a lot of Madison's world revolves

around New York geography, Madison Hudson. You know, she's like, well, my mom, fifth ab, she has been a help in raising Hudson. My cousin, my cousin, he's riverbed, we'd be alone. I'm gonna take that bitch today. I'm gonna kill you there right now. So, Rissa, I just want to scoot her.

And she's like, you are the cotton likely scooter here. Why are you complaining about? He's like, I'm not complaining about nothing. Please don't hurt me. So then, Catherine is at home with her kids. Some new home. We haven't seen this home before. Everyone's constantly moving on this show.

Newt, yeah. This is like basically an ad for Zillow. But yeah, she's in a new home that looks like the plantation. She was trapped on on season show. Newt. Yeah. There are cons. This is like basically an ad for Zillow. But yeah, she's in a new home that looks like the plantation. She was trapped on on season two, but I guess it's more in town. I don't know. I sort of has that look, you know, it's smaller, right? I don't know. All I know is that her daughter has jelly on her face and needs to be tended to. So yeah, that's what's happening. She's hugging her daughter with jelly on her face and then we go see Danny walk her dog and Classic Danny. Yeah, classic Danny and I'm always just an offer thigh gap Yeah, what kind of life would that be so that's where I was left in the beginning of the episode and

Then steps little dog Craig parking at him while he threatens to take a shower. Yeah The dog was very alarmed because it's not something he's seen before. Yeah, so you're getting too close to the water. What are you doing? And then we have Michael and Patricia and they're trying on, they're putting two twos on the dogs because you know, why not? They got time. They got time. It's just another scene where Patricia might as well just be sitting around in a bra with

a Benson in head just hanging out going, I'm rich. I'm rich as fuck. I can do whatever I want. Patricia's been doing quarantine long before we have been okay. Like while we were going crazy dressing up animals and objects with tutus, she's been doing it for like, you know, 10 years already. Yeah. So then we go over to Austin and Craig,

and they are at Austin's new house. I don't know how that happened. Only Austin could like totally fail in a business, and then suddenly have a house. Yeah, I don't, yeah. I understand that. I put a trajectory of Austin. Fossy Bear.

So Austin is, he's in a coffee, he's in a bathrobe that has all these coffee mugs that are sewn onto it. And then we just hear him, damn it Craig. Did you put that stuff in the wash again last night? This is insane. It's insane right now.

And Craig is in Pat pajamas. He's in Patricia. Patricia Cotour pajamas pajamas are just funny. And Austin's like, you know, if you left it there overnight, you should rewash it because it probably has mold. You just sweat the clothes and the washers and they probably have mold. Oh, you, my mom, 10 months ago,

I was living in a house decorated by a professional decorator and I felt like an adult. It was amazing. And then we see like the old house and everything and like camera and be like, Krig! Look! There's no mold anywhere! Krig! You probably fixed that trip in the ceiling, Krig! But then the plumber came over and he busted a pipe and I can't live there until the osmestos is gone. So instead I'm living with osmestos with highlights. Austin.

I mean, coronavirus, chlamydia, mesotheliuma. This show has it all, right? So, yeah, this show is definitely like cast by urgent care. Why? I feel like, um, Craig's, like, the fact that Craig is now like two for two with his previous homes and like broken walls, it's not a good track record. Like, this is the second time. Craig stabbed that pipe, okay. I'm like that he's trying to blame the plumber.

He's lucky he didn't wind up in an antiquated device. Yeah, so. And so then he's like, dude dude you left your socks in your underwear Sorry, there was a little Tom Santa Yeah, Tom's up here and craze down here Like you left your socks and underwear in the dryer And I was like well, I generally leave my socks and underwear in the dryer and then you just hear Danny Elfman in the background like Danny Eltsman in the background like I know I was like does this thing that people do leave their socks underwear and that's like just really is that thing everything girl I leave everything

about in that dryer yes and then if you just feel like you want it warm, feel like, hey, you know, what would it go? Well, that's cool. You just press play, you press play again. On your dryer story, though. Play Tina Turner. I mean, the launcher mat does get upset when you do that, but you know, a fuck it. Do some, wait, is, are you front loading or top down?

Top loading. I feel like it's a, I feel like that technique makes more sense if you're top loading because you just go in the... No, no, no, no, the washer is top. The washer is top. The dryer is side. Yeah.

The dryer is side. Most dryers are front. Well, I don't know, it's crazy to me. I, my method that I prefer is put it all into a laundry basket and then pull from there. My preferred method is calling somebody and saying, hi, it's Ronnie. Come get my laundry. Get that helps too.

I'm going to come get it. And you feel very fancy. Commissions. Here comes one right now. Celebrity beef. You never know if you're just going to end up on TMZ or trending on Twitter or in court. I'm Matt Bellasife.

And I'm Sydney Battle. And we're the host of Wonder Woman's new podcast, Dis and Tell. Each episode explores a different iconic celebrity view, from the build-up, why it happened, and the repercussions. What does our obsession with these feuds say about us? We're starting off with a pretty messy love triangle between Selina Gomez and Justin and Haley Beaver. A seemingly innocent TikTok of Selina talking about her laminated eyebrows. It snowballed into a full-blown alleged feud.

But it doesn't seem like fans are letting up anytime soon. Despite both Selina and the Bebers making public statements denying any bad blood. How much of this is team jealousy and lovers quarreling, and how much of it is a carefully crafted narrative designed to sell albums? Follow this and tell wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen ad-free on the Amazon music or wonder ya. Okay, so then Craig is like, yeah, my business, Owen down south is doing really well. We sell about a thousand pillows a month. And I've been to like 25 cities doing pop

up events and pillow parties. And then we just see a picture of him like fainting back on pillows. The man loves it. It is like next to him. He is like the new Craig Reneer. He's just running through with like a sash on his like welcome to the pillow party He loves that crab pillow. It's one of his most popular in his line Ramona singer has one I noticed on Ramona scout. She's got a crab pillow I like also very fitting for this show. I would like it is very fitting. I met the cast of Southern Charming came back resting on crabs.

So then we see Craig making a smoothie, which is amazing, because you know, he knows how to use a blender. And Austin is like, oh, did you know that Madison gave me this plant? And she thought I'd kill it and it's still alive. Are you kind of impressed? The question he's been asking for 30 years of his life and the answers continues to

be, no, not impressed at all. Yeah, that's so cute when you're in college. You're like 40. So then Austin is talking about like his stupid relationship with Madison, which I can't even believe they're faking about again this year. Here we go. Here we go, guys. He's like, after the reunion, we decided to take a break, me, Madison.

Okay. And then we see a clip of the reunion where Craig is like, come on, I saw you on Instagram with a bunch of dudes in Italy, Madison. You were like with tons of Italian dudes. Wow. Yeah. And even though they took six months apart they're back together And so both Shepp and Craig

Consuriously just fuck the fuck off, okay? Cuz I don't want to have another tip with him, okay? They can shut the fuck up. So they talk about Catherine's story on Instagram And we see the story and she's like cuddling saint. I think in an airport or something and then you just hear behind her. If you vote for me that person you like will like my Instagram and then that person will like that Instagram but all of the likes he come together in one city square Bayer Hands Bayer Hands. Do you think that if I put a little piece of metal into my what taught pants the TSA And my touch me down there. I'm thinking about a Catherine

Craig is like is that Thomas's voice and awesome's like yep sounds like it. Yeah, I can't quit you bro I'm about two people who I can't quit you bro bro. I Quit you bro. Like that two people who I can't quit you bro bro. I don't understand how you quit a job. I just get fired. So Catherine. Yeah, listen, I get that you had babies with a person. I get it, okay?

But A, that was your fault. I know you were young, but it's not like you had one baby with somebody. You've now had two. So I'm kind of sick of feeling free, okay? You've had two babies with this person. And now you're back. No, no, no, no, no, no, bye. That's that that's that now. Bye. Yeah, don't go back to the toxic dump. Not only that, that the woman

that he had been dating in a long-term relationship said such vile things about you and did not defend and you did not and he did not defend you in any sort of way that is reprehensible. But either way, so Catherine is, she's in her new house, her temporary house, the Ravenel compound, and she's there. At first, the scene seems normal. She's with the kids. She's wearing her signature leather pants.

The kids are really cute. The custody has been settled. It's 50-50 custody, And she and Thomas are getting along. And she goes, she goes, I just hope that it sticks this time. And then down the stairs, Thomas Ravinell. And the way that they show it is like, the white jeans, moose knuckle. Like a close-up on that front.

Moose knuckle crotch. And as you know, Ravine has a guess. Yes.. And then he, oh, he just gets more and more T rap as he comes down the stairs. So she's Catherine saying that she's staying with Thomas because he allowed me to use his master bedroom and we're not back together though. I'm like, not back together at all. I'm sure I mm-hmm, not back together at all. I'm sure, I'm sure. Yeah, just using the master.

So then Thomas gets a shot just by the fridge, like sucking on his own finger because he just stuck into some yogurt. I mean, just fucking discussing. Get him out of here. Why is he on my TV? Who is in fucking, uh, Homo resources over here?

Homo resources over. Homo resources. So, uh, um, so then Thomas is like, well, you know, Ken's is happy right now. She locks it when the two of us are together. So that way she can see exactly what sort of future she shouldn't have. She loves that. So they start talking to the kids like, what are you learning at school today? And Ken sees like, we're talking about caterpillars and I was like, I'm sorry,

your caterpillar's not fucking fascinating enough for you. I mean, you know what caterpillars go through when they're live young lady? Enjoy touching the poisonous one. And then like get a rash and then it's like well Didn't you know didn't weren't you paying attention in caterpillar class? It's actually a very valuable class young lady young lady And then Saint is learning about hot Okay guys math I'm only learning about animals? I think that's saying to that that age where They have to learn about animals that might actually pick them up and take them away somewhere

They're like okay kids. We're going up a recess If you see this bird let us know grab it by the feet Let us know grab it by the feet Just hold on it will fly you somewhere safe and but it's the Satan is actually really cute because then I guess Kenzie's like No, I think that we're talking about at a space. I make him you know, you know Kenzie in my mind talks like Audrey from little shop of So I kept on saying well what planet are we on and saying like So then she says No, and then we see foremost Southern charm star charged with sexual assault of nanny just that Minor application in their life Form a southern charm star charged with sexual assault of Just that

Minor complication in their life. Yeah, that's not just like hey mommy daddy both work late, you know Exactly that's what's so funny. We just never were normal, you know Yeah, like I was so young and your dad has been accused of rape, you know, just we never were normal. It's like, uh, modern family. Yeah, this modern, this 2020. So then, um, let's see, the kids are like running around like crazy. And Tom is, this, Tom is in her sit down on the couch

and he's like, it's not to have you here, but all we miss leading the children making them think that we're gonna be back together. Since when the fuck of you carried, how many people have you moved into your house? Give me a break. Yeah, exactly. I think the children's notions of like a, like you, you two having a normal family unit are long gone. I think it's, and that's probably thanks to Ashley amongst many other people.

And again, that headline we just talked about. So, so Catherine's talking about how she's been getting comfortable saying at Tom's house and she's renovating a townhouse that her that was bequeathed to her, but it was also the that townhouse of the last place where she was with her mother and her mom died of breast cancer last year. And so she talks about it and how like hard that was and how sad and how it was like very, very quick and how her mom was really her only advocate when she was going to this

horrific custody, which is very, very sad and I definitely feel for her anyone who's lost a parent I feel for. Although the thing that is interesting here is she's talking about how her mom was the only advocate for her in this horrific custody situation that she had with the man who's sitting right next to you. That's back in your lives. Yes. Yes.

Yes. The guy that tried to take those kids in the first place. Yes. Remember the act. Yeah. And he's like, well, now come on. And he's doing that thing. He's like, my hands behind my head on the couch.

So I'm being sexy and thoughtful at the same time. She's such an awkward price, like my least favorite pose that guys do. And he's like, well, we've been through a rough patch in the past couple of years. Oh, really? Yeah. Yeah, it's been quite a rough patch.

Yeah. Remember that me calling the cops on you constantly and trying to get your children taken away. Whoa, without little rough patch. But you know, it to get your children taken away. Whoa, without a little rough patch. But you know, it does take two to raise kids. So I was like, wow, a way to try and be nice to her and offend so many people at the same time. It's almost exactly.

Takes you to. He's like, well, I can tell that they're happy. So I feel like we're doing a good job. I'm like, maybe Catherine's doing a good job. I'm not sure about you, sir So yeah, that's enough. I mean the scene ends with him just licking his lips. I Also it's weird because on Twitter someone said hey, we heard that you were in Southern Charms first episode and He's like not only no but hell, no.

And so somebody was like, I thought you said you weren't in this, Thomas. And he's like, well, I didn't know that they were filming. Well, he's just a scene in my house. I had no idea it was gonna be used on the show. I thought those cameras were in your best. Yeah, you're in your best mousse nickel like so off pant white jeans And you've got a microphone on sir. It's just a disaster

So then we go to Madison's house is 6.30 in the morning and she's waking up her son Hudson and She's like I was wanted a son. I feel like I'm a I'm a boy mom, you know Can you imagine a little boy version of me that would be hell on earth? I'm like I can't imagine a little boy version of you. It's called every boy every little boy I've ever seen on TV I might that would be hell on earth Oh, hi handsome don't press your teeth yet. It makes me sick. It's such a ball of thing to do Well, I was 20 when I was married I had him at 22 and the we were divorced when he was three.

And I do cup parenting. So it's like 50, 50 on all 50 on all, especially like my relationship. Especially like a light switch, you know, you know how those work right? You turn them on, turn them off. So, uh, and it's like blow drying his hair.

It's like, yeah. It's like, like, little Hudson, little Hudson is the child after my own heart. So, uh, yeah. And she's like, yeah. Yeah. He's like making like a little Hudson. Little Hudson is a child after my own heart. So yeah, and she's like, well, she's like, well, are you got surprised? I mean, he is my child. He likes it as high as it can go. So I think we all see the subtext there,

and I support it. But so then Mass has started talking about how hard it is being a young, single mom. And there have been times when she hasn't had together and she's left clients in the chair, because she's, you know, hairstylist, to run and get Hudson and then come back. So I'm like, okay, that's okay, cool.

Cool. All right. I won't go butter your salon. Yeah. Come on, Richard, better to imagine salon. You could be there all day long, but we've got good highlights from a couple years ago. And she's got new music. They must really love Madison in production because they give her her own like any winehouse.

Yeah. It's like bottom. She's talking about blow dry. And then she calls Austin and the car, who's of course still in bed. And she tells us, when my friends heard I was back together with the house, they said, you fucking kidding me! And then we see a clip of Madison going, well I heard that you, chef, gave her Danny, Climedia. So what are y'all gonna say about that? Cause I heard Climedia.

There's poor Danny, they just rollin' that clip out about five times. It's like the new threesome clip. It's just rollin' that beautiful bean footage. And it's awesome. I'm like, well, I don't know if I said that. I mean, maybe I said it like late night, like a late night talk or something,

and then it cuts back to her and she's like, yeah, it was really hard to see Austin not to offend me. But, you know, we care about each other, we just can't stop. Defend you. What are you talking about? You were a fucking monster for that. How dare you?

So then we go over to Patricia's house where she's ringing the bell and she's like, I think I need a big a bell. How much is that Liberty Bell cost these days? They should mark it down, it's got a crack in it. Chef is coming over. Do we have enough liquor in the house? That's my question.

Come and put some plastic down so as hair oil doesn't disturb this lovely cow. Just thank you so much, Michael. So here's Chef, steps over and Looks really fresh young healthy Lot of vegetables, a lot of vegetables and water this guy's been drinking Now he doesn't he looks like he just like woke up on the street. I think it does look better than last season I think actually I have to say I think that chef does look a little decreased from last season

I actually thought also that Catherine seemed more lucid overall than we've seen her in a long time. So something weird is going on with this show. I don't know. It's very strange. So he's making fun of her. I love the sign outside this is beware of dog. Who's going to be afraid of these dogs?

Did you see that sign on the street? It said stop. It said stop. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh I'm just going to insert your feet into them and just walk around. I'm going to be completely happy. I'm going to be at the lip rest from Dynasty. So they get bourbon sauer's and he's like, one of the reasons I'm here is because I'd love to have a little shindig and I'd love you to come. And she's like, well, let me stall on that decision because the bourbon sauer's are here. Look, you have a Shinwase-Restaur, not that you would know, simple-tin.

Alright, there's taking in your mouth. Okay, well, this is a life is good party. I wanted to be funky, and not like a fuckstruck, because I'm just not that carnivore-guh-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h. It's like, ain't gonna have a theme, Shepard. I was thinking, Dom and Dom are all. Well, that would certainly be applicable. Who are you inviting?

He's like, well, you're gonna meet Taylor and my girlfriend. And you're inviting Madison. You're inviting a regular, audison, some sort of craft worker, a tailer to you. No, her name is Taylor. Oh, all right, all right. Madison some sort of craft work of a tail it. No, her name is Taylor. Oh All right, all right So many trades people in one party Well, I heard that she's very nice. Yeah, so she's like I invite Madison. He's like, well, yeah Well, I think they make it seem like oh, of course, gosh, I hate Madison I hate mass because of course, of course

I don't want enemies. It brings me no joy to have strife and we see the clip of him fighting with Madison Where he's like, well, you know what? Sticks and stones may break my bones like well, where's the pamphlet hurt you? Look at you. Look at you hurt my words. Look at you, Mr. Hurt my words You know, the thing is with strife, it's like that old saying, have we not all amidst life's petty strife, some pure idea of a noble life that once seemed possible? Thank you. He's like, look, Austin stuck with her, so I have to respect my friend and the elephant in the room you have to respect the elephant or you fight the elephant Oh, it's about the elephant in the room

$1,000 for on the mantle In season three that elephant was very expensive Samford please don't fight and please don't dance with it either Sam Samford please don't fight and please don't dance with it either Sorry, you're saying about the real elephant in the room and He's like well, I want inclusivity. He's like yeah, well you used to be that way but in the past months You've had just an angry jerk moment or two I Love the idea of inclusivity being broached on this show So yeah, it means like being nice to another white girl.

That's what it actually means. That's what it means. Inclusivity means being open and welcome to a white girl who may have made another white girl. Get upset. It means like inviting the other white girl that you're being misogynistic towards. It's to a party.

Well, the white girl who is a single mother. So we encourage all sorts of diversity of white girls here. That what you see Southern charm this year is so inclusive. Someone was finally nice to the hot blonde girl. So inclusive. It was so inclusive. So he's like, sometimes I'm combative and I want to win, but you know what? When you just want to win all the time, guess who wins?

Nobody! Except for me, but that's because I was built into a system where I was going to win just by being born into it. Anyway, you know, the thing is that sometimes I can lash out on. Lash your a-catsaw out of place. I really behave like a dumbass. And then we see, of course, the infamous IG video where he is mocking a homeless person. Yeah, we're a homo lady.

Look at your cans. But now I'm going to therapy. No, yeah, there are some things that therapy can't fix. Okay, stop, stop mocking homeless people, how about that? Let's start there, okay? Well, because he goes, well, I saw hard to hydro therapist and she's amazing and Patricia just goes, hmm, like don't try to fool me, Shepard.

Well, like both don't try to fool me, but also therapy is gross, you know? There's like, that's all done. It's like, hmm, a therapist. It's real. Yeah, there's a lot of different tones going on there. I mean, I do think therapy can fix a lot of things. It was one tone, but it was like a bell chime chorus at the same time, you know?

It's a bell chime. It's very orchestral recap. It was a one tone version of... Danyl. Danyl. So, he's like, listen, Garsh, I just want to slow the process of becoming an angry old Don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don don't don't don't don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don don So, Garsh, I'm just trying to solve the examin' and improve. Oh God, and he's getting the full on sad music now. Now he's got sad orchestra while he gives his big jack speech. It's like, yeah. Ba-ba-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da- This is like hard to say, but I do feel like Shep has the potential to at least change his

ways somewhat compared to someone like Jack's. Like, Jack's will never change. Jack's, like I feel like Jack's is again, no upside whatsoever. I think Shep there could be some potential to like get his shit together. I think he's like self-aware. I think the difference is I think that Shep is very smart whereas Jackson's not very smart. So I'd like to think that because Shep is smart,

he like may have like the ability to have some sort of self-awareness and reflection. Well, Shep is smart enough to learn what's offensive. But that may be a false association. I think he's smart enough to learn what's offensive and change the way he's talking, but not the way he is necessarily, you know?

It's like you never want, I always say I don't want terrible people to go to therapy because it just teaches them how to be better sociopaths. You know, it's like, oh, now I can be more acceptable in my dickishness. Right. Well, you know, listen, we're like, I'm an awful person. You know, it's a lot. So maybe I just feel it. They I'm just like, ah, so. So a awful person. I'm, so he's like, well, we all need to self examine and improve.

And Patricia's like, now I'm beyond that. Respect. So then, uh, rain, it's a rainy day. And chef is driving and he calls Craig, who's like got a big mustache in his phone picture Yeah, and he's like what are you doing Craig's like? Oh, I'm good just sitting on my porch swinging contemplating life Sounds like a jealous commercial. I said that because I'm in therapy now Who's Alice and how do I see her no Craig? Oh? Who's Alice and how do I see her no Craig oh?

I'm having a dumb and dumb party and Craig's like did you like cam because something stressing her out I think like I don't know what it is, but something stress. I don't know I don't know if you have Instagram, but if you did Maybe you know that something is totally stressing her out right now And we find out that cam hasn't been hanging out a lot because last year really left a bad taste in her mouth. Like, no, I think that she's, I mean, like, if last year was the year that left a bad taste in her mouth, I'm not sure about that.

I mean, there have been a lot of years that should have left a bad taste in her mouth. I think that she's basically, A, there's rumors about her boo, and she's probably not the type that wants to indulge that. She's also now full on mommy. And so she's like, my life is about my children now.

So you know, she was half out the door last season anyway. Well, also all of her seasons have been bashing Catherine. And then Catherine had her redemption season where she had to be nice to Catherine. And so it's probably just like fuck this, you know Well, there's also like you know Cameron Chelsea and Naomi all are gone and they all were like we're leaving and At the time I was like good for them. They shouldn't be like dealing with all these assholes

But then pardon me is also like or maybe they were just fired And at the time, I was like, good for them. They shouldn't be like dealing with all these assholes. But then, pardon me, it's also like, or maybe they were just fired. There's also potentially, they were just got fired because they actually, none of them had anything going on in their storylines. Yeah, because it was released a long time ago that they were, that Naomi and Chelsea were fired.

They were let go from the show. At least this is how I'm remembering it. And then the camera and stuff happened way later. And then they came out, we're're like we're quitting too and solidarity And I was like I think two of you were fired, but yeah I'm not really sure and then today I did my research in other words I laid around in bed and read Instagram But I was trying to figure find stories that said they were fired, but I couldn't find any so I don't know if that was in my head or what? All I know is Naomi did not go on the cast trip last year, so that's never a good sign.

But anyway, um, uh, so Shep is like, gosh, I sympathize. I didn't like what happened last year either. That left a bad taste in my mouth, but that was also because I haven't brushed my teeth in about six months. Yeah, and the clip we see of the bad taste in our mouth is the Climidia rumors, which yeah, of course, it left a bad taste in your mouth. Pousing around Climidia. And so she and Cameron crying and going, if that was spread about me, I would be more confined.

Like, can you stop shaming people who get Climidia? It's a fully treatable thing. So like stop making people stop making it seem like people who've got, who've had the Climidia are like, just like these vile pariahs that, that like you would just never ever want to be. I mean, if you're crying out loud, it's just take a pill. People fuck, guys. It's okay.

It's okay, it's, you know, people get Climidia. Koala's got Climidia, okay. It's okay. It's you know people get chlamydia koala's got chlamydia, okay? So if it's okay if we can look at a koala with a chlamydia and still find it cute and adorable can't you treat your fellow friends that way too? Yeah, you shouldn't be ashamed of chlamydia. You should be ashamed of banging chef. I mean that's disgusting. Okay, she's worse than chlamydia Dmitriot I've got demidious. So anyway, speaking of which, so Craig goes, dude, I love it.

So Craig goes and meets up with Catherine at this bar. And he's like, I need to get my nails done. And they start talking about what he's going to get done and everything. And so it's like, are Are you gonna do jail or S&S? He's like, S&S, because oh my God, you know what that is, I love it. What is S&S, I don't know. I have no idea.

I don't even know if it is S&S. That's what I wrote down about them. I don't fucking know. Have you seen my nails? Like, it's an app, my nails are basically just like to cut mine. Things that I kind of bite off a little bit to clean my teeth. Okay.

So we were either, or to open a Diet Coke cab. Like, why else do we even need them? SNS is probably the proprietary nail polish brand at, what's the name of the store? That other Madison is like the heir to. Gwin's. Gwin's. Gwin's. Gwin's. Gwin's. Gwin's. Madison is like the heir to. You know, twins, twins,

twins, twins, twins, so she orders a bourbon and Coca-Cola. She's like, it's happy hour. And then she tells us, I went to rehab for we. That's all. And when I first got back from rehab,

I used to go, I couldn't even go out because people would just look at me like, oh my gosh, she's off the wagon. But I went to point now where if I order to go, I couldn't even go out because people would just look at me like, oh my gosh, she's off the wagon. But I'm at the point now where if I order a drink, I order a drink and it's no one's business. Where is this? You're right there, her energy's totally different. Like, she's like, it's,

because like in the past, like her interviews will sometimes be more animated, but then in the show, she'll be like, I'm sad. All right. But she's just like, hey, I'm cathartan. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Which I actually am like, I'm happy for it because whatever it was, that was like going on.

It seems to be like, that's done. So for now, I should say, because nothing is ever done on the show. But so so now Craig is, they're talking about Craig's chef's party and Craig is like, they're talking about whether or not they're gonna dress up. He's like, I'm gonna dress up. I'm a participator. Oh.

Yeah. And she's like, who's this tailor girl? I haven't met her. And he's like, oh, it's chef's girlfriend. And then they get their food, boiled peanuts, and cheese plates, and oh god watching these things People have missed that Charleston food So you know well look all right, let's just talk shit now all right like you know that I'm getting asked

That's all I needed to tell you so let's talk shit So you know I cut chef off for months. I was like you've got an attitude problem It's not even a drinking problem. you're just an asshole and she's like yeah he was a dick to me but when he sees me he's like hey Catherine what's up isn't the show called Southern charm is not like part of what the contract is in the south we're friendly to each other right isn't that the whole thing? Yeah, bless his heart So he's like yeah, he's singing therapist. He's dating this new girl and I mean, I don't want to say he's a good person. He's still shut

But you know, he's still alive. So there's that so anyway I just hope Cam comes to the party and Catherine's like what's up with her? And he's like well, I think that you know She just needs to have a little fun because she's been really party and Catherine's like, what's up with her? And he's like, well, I think that, you know, she just needs to have a little fun because she's been really sad. And Catherine's like, oh yeah, Momkiel's a real thing, so I get it. Yeah, and then Craig playing it boy here, you know, like, hmm. Yeah, yeah. And so then Craig is like, yeah, even Jason wants her to go out and have some fun time.

Yeah. She's like, oh, well, that's funny. It's funny that he'd wanna get out, want her to be out of the house because I heard some shit. I heard that Jason is having a affair. Oh my God. And he was like, what from who? Because if it's from Madison's bullshit,

that's absurd. That is not true. She was like Craig. Craig, he's like, no, no. He's like, you can't just talk shit like that. And she's like, whatever, you know, um, which what a choice, what an odd choice for her to do that. Yeah. I like it's like getting revenge way too long after. You know, like if this was two seasons ago, and you're like, well, her husband's cheating, I would get it. but what are you doing?

Well, there is also maybe this is the thing where Cameron was supposed to be filming. And you know, remember Jason finally showed up on camera, which, you know, he's never wanted to be on this show. He's never been part of the show. He never liked, he finally shows up on camera. And then this rumor, there's this rumor starts, the, it starts happening.

It's happening on the show. And you know that Jason was probably like, see, I told you, I told you I show up on that show and the moment I show up on that show, they start dragging me through the mud. And this is all your fault, and he probably pressured her to leave the show instead of dealing with this. That's my new theory as of right now.

But anyway, I like Craig when he goes, I like gossiping as much as the next person. I mean, I was most dramatic. That was my superlative in high school. Can't you see? Look how dramatic I am right now. But this shit is dark. And she's like, whatever. And he's stressing out like, what is she doing? You know, now I'm in the scene, this like outing camera and whatever bullshit. And so I look this up on the internet, very nap time. And this lady is a makeup artist

or something in Charleston and said, she's never even met the guy. And she's broke and she's cut me to the core. Something like that, like it's rocked me to my core because now she's in national media being called all sorts of names and stuff. So everyone's denying it and they're just saying that Catherine's just making this up to get back at Cameron. So it is just like very delayed. Yes, because Cameron went on Naomi went on Instagram.

I was like, that's why all of us are quitting this show. We're not into this. And Catherine, you should be ashamed of yourself for this and lots of other things. Yeah. Well, Catherine is... Catherine is... Well, I feel like we will be... We will probably have the many choice words for Catherine later this season. That's for sure.

We can go to that. Yeah, my God. She sure setting it off. So, he's stressing out. So, he goes to the bathroom. He's like, what the fuck? So, he leaves. And then she just looks at the camera and it goes I'm back so

Now we go to see we see she up with Taylor and little Craig the dog and like harsh little Craig needs a bath Oh, so here's how I met Taylor. I was a Sullivan's Island and I was at, I saw two girls at home team and I was like, who's that? Gawr, she looks poor, but then she was hot too. So I was like, Gawr, she wanna hang out. And here we are, washing a dog. Yeah, she lied to me and she told me that her specialty was a marine biologist

and her special to a shark sex. And I started to grill her because I sort of know about shark sex. Oh, oh, oh. Oh. Oh. her special to his shark sex and I started to grill her because I sort of know about shark sex. She's actually a dental sister. These are the gems we would have gotten if we had if we had Shep's what was relationship season two. Yeah, so she's modeling one of his stupid flat cats and You know, they're just like a cute little couple. He got a dry cleaning. She washes the dog with him I'm so happy everything's great

I'm a good person now So then we go to Madison's house where she's getting dressed at Austin and he's like he has like a steamer And he's like trying to steam his shirt stick. It it's work. I can't get this to work. Madison is insane right now. This steamer doesn't even work Madison. And she's trying on like the fanciest clothes to wear to the dumb and dumb party. She comes up like a blue ball gown. She's like, what do you think of this? And he's like, oh,

it reminds me of Mulan, Like, a Gaysha princess. Like, what? Have you even seen Mulan? I have never seen Mulan, but even I know that that's totally not accurate whatsoever. It reminds me of Aladdin, the story of a Wall Street sock broker who gets a cocaine addiction, right? Yeah. No, that's not it. Oh, I just said Mulan because Shep said that we're inclusive now. So.

Wow. So then her second look is like a sequin, like a sequins, a black sequin dress with a cowboy hat. So that's what she's going with. And Matt is like, well, you know, if I can forgive someone for a threesome video as like roll the footage, it's like... Yeah.

Madison! Madison, you're insane right now! Man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, man, Matt van crazy crazy crazy Now Madison nuts I can bring you someone for call me white trash. That's basically her point. She's for giving shit So Madison calls Catherine and they talk about what they're wearing and Danny's there Nothing really happens. Yeah, so then yeah, that's time for the party Well three hours until the party, but first Craig goes and visits Leva and then they have this they like hug and everything and then they have this like very hastily edited scene.

It's like they're they're seen as like a montage where he's like, um, so a Catherine told me Jason's having a fair and that was like, that's a bold face lie. I'micarator. I'm gonna cha I'm gonna cha I'm gonna cha I'm gonna lock her I'm gonna chop off her head. She's terrible. This is a bullshit. This bullshit is best man ever knew. It's like Yeah, she's like that is a miserable Catherine move. Did she come with receipts? No, of course not He's like, yeah, but why would she say something like that? She's like a resentment because back in the day, Cam wasn't nice to her. And then we get a nice long package of Cameron hating on Catherine, left to right.

Yes. And she's like, maybe there's some jealousy that she's in a happy relationship and has a nice calm family and, you know, everything's going okay. And he's like, so you think it's old resentment. And she's like, yes, she just needs drama to feel a lot. Now here's, that's my question too. So Catherine, are we thinking that Catherine just made this up

out of nowhere? I don't, I don't honestly. This is crazy. Nothing makes sense. Everything that Catherine does does not make sense to me. Like I, I, I, I, I, it used to sort of make sense, but now it doesn't make sense whatsoever. And I'm just, I, I just, I'm just going to just like sit and watch and see watch and see where it happens. Yeah, that's smart. So then he spits on himself. By the way, it probably came from Thomas Ravenel if you really think about it.

Yes, that's what it sounds like, right? Let's look, let's really, I mean, it's right there. It's right there. And I believe that Thomas Ravenel would make it up and then tell Catherine and then she would be like, ah, there's an FAR. You know? Yeah.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R.R. So she got all of 30 seconds and now it's nighttime and They are like I guess they're chef and Taylor or rather the venue and she's like we're here on a Honey bunches of votes look. I'm a good person now

If you don't believe me look what I'm about to say hey, you didn't let me open your door for you and do the whole rigmarole Look I I mentioned opening a door for a lady and I said rigmarole what kind of horrible person could I possibly be? Yeah, let's go into my inclusive party where inclusivity means we put all the black people on stage before and for all us the white people I'm including dumb people and dumb are people So the party planners like oh well I hope everything's okay We've got some oysters over there some potato cakes and of course two cute girls to serve it He's like what I don't know why she said two cute girls Nothing to me Oh

And then we have so the Madison Austin show, and then there's like this really bizarre Side plot that I got actually very invested into. There's a guy named Peter who kind of looks like what you would think a straight version of Pete Buttigieg would wind up as, you know And he does have a Buttigieg kind of like And they're both named Pete. So so he's there with Liz and Pete there with Liz, that's his girlfriend and so she and then we just see them. I'm like, okay, cool. Yeah, they're like, hi, Liz and Pete. They're like, oh, hello. And then the camera just stays on them, looking like I was like, why are we still with Liz and Pete? Like he's just like random. Right. And they were two. They're like, why are the cameras just saying on us? They're

looking at like really awkward and she looks like she's getting really pissed. And then we see them the further away, like I guess she pulls him away and we just see her like telling him off. Well, yeah, because Madison, because we see Madison and Shep is talking to Madison and he's like, what are you drinking? She's like, tequila. I think that's what we're gonna stick to and then Sh chefs like, oh, y'all are sticking to something. And then he just see Peter and Liz just like fighting. He's like, what?

What's happening? What's going, why are we keep cutting the Peter and Liz and why are they fighting? I'm just like, why? Oh my gosh, is he a trouble or something? So he walks up to them and he's like, so what happened? Oh, and then he tells us, so Peter and Madison had a thing. Whoops, that was a typical set.

And this is such a jacks move too. Like, look at what a good person I am this season. Oh, sorry, just set up Madison again. And Poor Liz. Poor Liz doesn't understand how TV works. She's like, I just don't want people to hear about this. Do you realize? I don't want, and Peter's like, I haven't said words.

I haven't said anything. And Liz is like, I just don't want people to know about this. I don't want people to know about it. I'm like, Liz, you are creating a scene that's gonna be on camera. Yeah, currently have cameras on you. And, am I, I mean, we hear her and she's like, Oh, I'm saying, it's come on.

It's no big deal. It's don't the end of the world. You're really thinking too much of this while he brings his mic over there to get everything that they're saying I mean this guy is such an ass So isn't the producer ass him so you invited them to fuck with Madison, right? Like you invited this couple and he's like, no Didn't you hear me say rig a morole earlier? It's an inclusive party. I want to invite everyone who has slept with Madison.

I'm including them all. Oh my God. And he says that no, last year he planned it to make Madison look stupid. But this year he's like, well, I just didn't even think about it. I mean, Peter's all of our friends. It just didn't cross my mind that there would be a problem. He's all of our friends and for some people, He's an even closer friend a really really really close friend That's all gosh

God and so Austin sees it and he's not really sure what's going on So he just tells Madison so how are things going with chap? She's like great But she tells us you know, I know right when I see Peter the chef hadn't changed one bit And he's still a little bitch, but hey if you want to entertain one night stand. I have when I was single then hey, that's on him So then Whitney and Patricia arrive and so Taylor gets to meet Patricia and she's like Now Taylor now. I'm gonna ask you a question. What snack chip are you the sign on to? What's your last night? Are you

Are you a ruffle or you were lays your not related to a chip of any sort? Okay. All right. Uh-oh sense a checks mix descendant I'm sorry. I know your last name is Wetzelba. We do not accept pretzels in this circle. So Danny and Madison, Gwen's Madison, which is gonna get very confusing. So it's gonna be a lot of fun. Madison, who was on one of the bloat, was she on selling yacht or was she on below deck regular?

I can't even remember at this point. She was on with a very demanding group of people who wanted vegan food. I seem to, they were just relaxed. She was the one that was with that girl. I'm a chef. So, I'm here to check on everything because chef to chef. That's right. How about chef to chef?

Go fuck yourself for whatever. That's for the brewed season. Yeah, that's appropriate. So they come in, Catherine said, everybody's saying hi or whatever. And then Taylor sees Craig and she's like, oh, Craig, your button, he's like, it's missing. I couldn't find my sewing kit. Craig, this is your brand now. How do you show up someplace with a missing button? How do you not find your sewing kit? It's literally your job. And then we meet a really gross Harry guy who comes in. Yeah. And he's the

new guy. Congratulations. John Pringle. John Pringle. And Patricia's like, hey, he's a good looking guy for a Pringle descendant. Catherine already has her eye on him and she's like, and we find out that Chef and John went to school together. So they did that and Patricia's like, now John Pringle, I want to know if you're related to any of the Pringles that you just have a house on the battery. I'm like, is Patricia talking about real people in real places or is she just looking at objects around the room?

Are you the Pringle from the battery that was next to the staples? Are you the Pringle from the flash light Philip you? Are you from the you are the Pringle from the leaves to live on the scissors next to Baltimore? And he's like, yeah, that was my grandfather grandfather Pringle and Shep is like, yeah, who's he telling I think he's telling Catherine this He's like, yeah, he has two sons and his ex-lives in San Diego now, and he just moved back. You know, he's always been that guy that you worry about leaving around your girlfriend, you know? And he needs a bad ass thing.

That's the best thing to say, by the way. Also, he was raised in a house that was haunted by Confederate soldier ghosts, like even the ghosts on the show were kind of racist. Wow, wow. Did he say that? Yeah, because she was, well Patricia was like, she's like, oh, the Pringles from the house on batteries.

Like, yeah, that was my grandfather's house. It was, people said it was haunted with Confederate soldiers. It's like, of course, of course on this show we got Confederate soldier ghosts. Oh my God. So then he meets Madison and you know she's like, ha, don't don't get me.

They look like they're flirting. And it's like, ding, wow, she sits and Austin's all uncomfortable. He's like, I just got my hair high lit for this. He's like, oh, I've heard a lot about you. I heard you, you womanize, you're kind of messy and you have money, but, uh, Ha, basically, uh, you're just kind of like a slob.

So, welcome to the crew. Yeah, you're gonna fit right in. So then Patricia is telling Whitney, who's also there, Heather. She's like, where's the food? He's like, I think they're bringing trays. And she's like, you can't have a party, serve liquor, not serve food. I have to throw a party myself to get decent food, not my kind of party.

So then, so I think she and Whitney leave or something like that, maybe not. But then Catherine goes up and of course, she introduces herself to John Pringle. And Patricia still there, because then she's trying to really sell John Pringle to Madison, and she's like, well, I was talking to John Pringle of the Pringles family. He has two children, sort of snack-sized,

and your children could play with his children. You know what I'm saying? I hope they're comfortable in tubes. And then she tells us Madison X I could grow up and all the students I could child. I think she deserves better. Did I say that? I don't know because I'm currently starving to death.

Yeah, she says, he, she needs someone who's successful and ambitious and not just a frapp boy. I'm like, okay, well, where is that person? Is he coming to the party? So Madison's like, well, looks like Catherine just ran over there, snap him up. Yeah, I guess so.

So Catherine is talking to this guy now and she's like, so what do you do with yourself? I'm a talking penny. It's like less bronzer, please. Oh my God, you look like something somebody threw in a fountain for good luck. God. He's like, well, I do energy derivatives,

and I also play the guitar. That's like my thing. And then we see a video of him just being like super David Gray. And he's like, Daddy knows he'll be with her to the merry days of his final breath is draw. Wow. It was all for you. It was all for you.

It was all for you. Please stop. Please. OK, relax. Please stop. Go make some other kind of energy out of energy or whatever energy derivatives means. Just do that.

But if La Kiss is a walkin' in man, Fizz, I'm like, I don't need this type of music. And then he's just chucking his drink down. So then I just showed the lighting in this party. It's like Phillips you has really done a good job of selling. I have to say there's this colored lights everywhere. So they're all so by the way Southern charm has never found a party they couldn't like with full on full bright fluorescent whole yeah every single party's like yeah so John oh yeah so he's like, whew! Yeah. So John, oh yeah, so he's still talking to Catherine.

And is he? Oh no, no, he's talking to Madison. Now we're gonna Madison. Yeah, and he's like, so bad told me you have a son. He's what I gotta say about that. It's all for your son. It's all for your son. The cats and the cradle and the cradle has beer. I like to use a cradle for cats and beer

And this is where I wrote he's a drunk Okay, and then soft sweet jazz is playing and Catherine's talking to Craig and He's like oh no she goes so cam texted me. He's like oh, yeah, I'm sorry. I had to I mean I told Leva and then I guess Leva texted her And so well, thanks for being honest about it Yeah, and the text was like why are you telling people that Jason is cheating me on me on camera? I'm so confused and captain's response was Hey girl. Yeah, let's be going around Hey girl. It's been going around. Catherine, give me a break.

Be a good human being. I am one. Sorry. She makes one of her Catherine faces. She's like, I am one. Sorry, rumors in Charleston. And she just rolls her eyes and puts down the phone. Yeah.

So then our Catherine is, yeah, Catherine's basically like, well, you know what, Cameron had no problem burning my house down, so then our Catherine is yeah, Catherine's basically like well, you know what Cameron had no problem burning my house down so whatever Yeah again if this was two years ago maybe okay, but what are you doing? What are you doing? And so she does Shit was she thinks I mean she literally hurt me to my core by the meanest, nastiest things you could say about someone. So, you know, anyone who thinks Cam is just this guy's girl, it's got this lily white smile and perfect teeth,

she's an asshole. Yeah, yeah, when she pulled up the lily Pulitzer, I was like, damn, Catherine got really savage all of a sudden. And God, I really, I- Wait, I wish you say I wrote it down, Ron. What did she say? She said So for everyone who thinks that cams this guys girl that's wearing lily Pulitzer with a big old smile on

Perfect teeth. She's an asshole Okay, thank you. That makes more sense. Well, no yours works as well. They both they both make sense But so we slowly put something made it even more savage. I don't know what she is doing. That's crazy. So then, and also Craig said in interviews, I think I was reading it on the cheat sheet that she was supposed, because Cameron is saying, I didn't quit because of the husband rumors.

I had already quit a long time ago. And he was like, no, she was scheduled to film with me. And you know, she heard this and refused to show up to film. So who really knows, but that's... Maybe she'd quit and she was scheduled to film with me and you know, she heard this and refused to show up to film. So who really knows, but that's maybe she'd quit and she was gonna be like a friend of or something like that, which actually makes the most sense.

But yeah, I mean, it was, you know, it's, yeah, it's, this is gonna be an interesting season for sure, for sure, but I think we're gonna have fun making fun of it because we always do. Well, it's a shame because this would have been a really, really fun season if they were like actually going at it because in the past they haven't really gone at it, gone at it. They've done it in like in the Southern way.

You know, Catherine talks to everybody else about it and gets her excluded from everything and then Catherine kind of cries about it. They haven't really gone at it on the show, so that would have been really fun to watch. So thanks for Robinus of that. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Well, we'll see what this, what's in store for us next week. And the trailer is really intense. I mean, the trailer is like, damn, it looks like this is a show that has been

generally polite about things. And it looks like they are broaching a lot of the controversies that we read about in the off season, which I'm glad about. I'm interested to see how they handle it. So I'm reserving judgment. And we're just going to be here enjoying Halloween. I do know that in this preview, when Madison dumps Austin, she's like, we are going to take a break. And he's like, are you serious right now?

He would be doing that. He wouldn't. And he's like, are you serious right now? It's like scratching. I got the, he would be doing that. He wouldn't be scratching his armpit while they, are you serious? He always has to be using his hand on some part of his body. Are you serious right now? Oh, so fun. Seriously.

And that brings us to the end of Southern Charm. We are gonna be doing our live show for the season premiere of Real Housewives of Salt Lake City. That's November 12th. Get your tickets. You can find the ticket link on WatchWalkCrapins.com. That's on locationlive.com slash watch what crap inside believe. But you can also find the link at WatchWalkCrapins. You can see this video or any of our other videos over on patreon.com slash watch what crap ends.

And we'll talk to you next week. You guys have an amazing Halloweeny! Bye! Bye! Watch what crap ends with like to think it's premium sponsors! Ain't no thing like Allison King! Ashley Savoni, she don't take no baloney! Dana C. Dana Duh!

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