Watch What Crappens - Summer House: Carlbellion

Episode Date: March 8, 2018

The Summer House roomies are on a full Carl rebellion, and the always dependable soldier Ervrott shows up as backup. Enjoy! This week's bonus a catch up of Married To Medicine! To hear it, become a premium subscriber at http://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens ***Crappens Live is coming to Chicago, San Francisco, Phoenix, Irvine, DC, Detroit and Houston! Find ticket links at watchwhatcrappens.com. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.Our Patreon Extras: https://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Get ready for a double load of Queen of Hearts! It's me, Jujubee, and I return to guide sexy singles through some ronchy blind dates. Cameras off! Voice only! Launching during Pride! Queen of Hearts takes Miami by storm, with Daeders' Cuppe from Tampa Bayes, Just Chaz, and Brittany Brave to name a few. Follow Queen of Hearts on Amazon Music or wherever you get your podcasts. For all of our bonus episodes and premium content, become a member over at patreon.com slash watch what crap ends

That's patreon.com slash watch what crap ends You can also find us on social media on Twitter. We're at what crap ends on Instagram and Facebook at watch what crap ends We'll see you there I've got a lot of crap in my mind. I've got a lot of crap in my mind. I've got a lot of crap in my mind. I've got a lot of crap in my mind. I've got a lot of crap in my mind. I've got a lot of crap in my mind. I've got a lot of crap in my mind. I've got a lot of crap in my mind.

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I've got a lot of crap in my mind. I've got a lot of crap in my mind. I've got a lot of crap in my mind. I've got a lot of crap in my mind. I've got a lot of crap in my mind. I've got a lot of crap in my mind. I've got a lot of crap in my mind. I've got a lot of crap in my mind. I've got a lot of crap in my mind. I've got a lot of crap in my mind. I've got a lot of crap in my mind. Watch what crap ends would like to think it's premium sponsors! Kristi, why were you dourty? Kelly, rawr, Barlow! Our kind of mess, saying?

Just saying? Megan, you can't have a burger without the burger! And also our super premium sponsors. Our lucky little grand topper, Kelly Grants! And Lizzie Drucker, she's a fun mother f- We love you guys. Hello and welcome to Watch What Happens. The podcast about all that crap. We just love to talk about on Geo Brawbs. I'm Ronnie Karen from the Rose Pricks Bachelor

Roast, which just finished up its season of the Bachelor. My walls are down. I became so vulnerable that I am, you I need to be put in a hospital. And here I am with my gorgeous talented gorgeous wonderful little friend. Mr. Ben, Ben Mandelker of the B side vlog in the Banta Blender. Hello, Ben. Hi, Ronnie. Congratulations for making it through another season of the Bachelor. I don't know how you do it.

I don't know how you cover all these Bravo shows shows and the bachelor. That's well, they're really fun girl. I mean, it's a fun life, but man, that bachelor needs to be like half the time. Yeah, that it airs. I mean, Jesus Christ, they just keep sitting there saying the same things over and over again. You're all horrors. Okay, make it stop. So you can tell the season, but here we are on Kiosbeath down some a house. But before we get into all that good stuff, we are on to where we're going to be in Houston when tomorrow, tomorrow night, tomorrow after this podcast, we're hopping on a plane and flying to Texas. Yes, sir.

We are going to be in Houston, Texas. So go get link, the link to that is at watchwhatcrapons.com to buy tickets. And then at the end of this month, we are in Detroit. So go get those. And then right after that. And then in the middle of next month, we are in Irvine in Orange County, California. Ooh, what would happen? Ooh.

And just to sweeten the deal, we are going to be talking about the real housewives of Beverly Hills, dinner party from Hill, classic episode featuring Alison Dupe-Wah at our Houston show. So go, if you're in the Houston Metro area, just go. And what else are you doing on a Friday and I? Buy a ticket? Come see us. We have a lot of fun. It's great. I'm actually, I've never been to Houston. I'm very excited. I haven't even been there on a layover. So this is Texas my home state We also have a contest on Instagram right now. Why don't you tell the people about it? Why thank you Ronnie

As many of you know, I'm a big board gamer and there's this brand new game called Castell We're in the game you build Human towers because this is a Catalonian tradition because there's by the way a board game for everything including human towers in Spain But it's a super fun game. It's by Renegade games and Renegade has been so kind to offer up a free copy for our listeners So we are doing a Photoshop contest where we want you guys to Photoshop a human tower made up of proper liberties. So it could be like a tower of the real house as a New York City cast or it could be a mix

of all sorts of things or a whole bunch of different Bethany's. Who knows, you can do whatever you want. Photoshop it, put it on Instagram, tag us to at what crap ends in the caption. Also include these three hashtags, hashtag, WCrapins, hashtag, crap ends game, and hashtag play renegade. In order to be eligible to win, we look forward to seeing all the Photoshop's. The deadline is March 20th, and then we will look at some highlights and judge them and choose which

ones we like the most and whoever wins We'll get a copy of Castell so if you're looking to get into board gaming if you are into board game Or you just have a friend that you want to give to game 2 this is a perfect opportunity to do it so I'm I'm actually super super excited about this contest because whenever we've done a contest in the past like when we gave away a Cookbook a Caroline Fleming cookbook and we asked people to do Instagram tributes to her. People really came up with some hilarious stuff. So looking forward to it, we're gonna have fun with it.

Yeah, yeah. Ronnie, do you wanna do a human tower with me? Um, well, you're the bottom. Still sound fun. Still sound fun. Okay, so let's move on to some summer house. It's Kyle's birthday. Yes. Summer house. Summer house. Summer house. Summer house. The summer house thing. So, um, yeah, the episode opens up with we're still in momtons weekend, which I only say that because it's set it on the screen.

Momtons instead of Hamptons because it was a call original it's a call original joke. And I think they're staying like not in the Hamptons, right? Aren't they a little outside of the Hamptons because the Hamptons won't let them shoot or whatever? They're in a town called Water Mill, Water Mill in New York which I think is still considered. It's not technically the Hamptons because it's Water Mill

but it's basically the Hamptons dinner. Water. It's like the way you can. It's my mill. So it's my mill Hampt. because it's watermelon, but it's basically the Hamptons in the water. It's like the way you get to mom. So it's mom. So it's mom. It's mom. You know, it's like if you go to Santa Monica, you're still considered being an LA, even though technically Santa Monica is its own separate city.

Oh, getting tricky on my own turf. Yeah. Yeah. At least the Vanderpump so arrives at the summer house. It's great. It has a great time. So you fixes all the chandeliers. The song leading into this is one of my favorites of the season.

I have to say, it goes, are you ready for the good time? Take in time until the sun shines. You know, so many questions in these songs. What does that mean? Take in time until the sun shines. I don't know. It's going to take time. A whole lot of precious time. It's shines. I don't know. It's gonna take a whole lot of precious

time. It's going to take patience and time until the sun comes, the sun comes, the sun comes. I'm sorry. Am I destroying the legacy of a musical icon at the moment? Yeah. They probably meant the same thing. Basically, basically, like, a woman house is about to start going around. Yeah. This is basically a riddledle and it means do white people like to get really drunk and then grow up on each other and fart on each other all night. Yes, thank you. Come to Monten's. Yeah.

I like that they went to a white party this episode. It was I call it a summer house party. So we start. Stephen comes in and he's announcing it on his cell phone, which I'm not really sure what's going on with that But he's like is everybody ready from mama drama? I thought a drag queen was gonna come in. Hey, it's mama drama No, Stephen. I like imagining Stephen as the game show host of things Welcome to the Wheel of Fortune.

Is that your final answer? We've been waiting. Do you want like a lifeline or something? We've been waiting forever. You guys, that contestant told me that she wants to buy a vow. Oh. The password is boring.

Oh. Welcome to Wheel of Fortune. the password is boring. Welcome to Wheel of Fortune. It's boring. He just says it right now. Could you please make an effort? Could you please, could you please be more specific? Newlyweds game except parents team up with cuts Which you know with the news this week of people like fighting to Mary 14 year olds in Kentucky or some shit I don't think that this is a that's an appropriate joke summer house to be allowing that to air this week We can America. Thank you. It is it's a sensitive weekend America and summer house is just ripping open wounds That are not healed, you know? Yeah, let us heal. We just heard us. We just heal. So of course true to Steven. Steven's questions are like, has your child ever been cheated on by a significant other?

And then they all have their like, has your child ever given a blow job to someone of the same sex? How often do you think your child masturbates? How often do you think your child masturbates? How often do you think your child masturbates to someone who looks like you? Do you know what adipest means? He's like, do you like my scarf? Do you want my megaphone, be honest?

Do you like my megaphone, be honest? Which is hilarious because, of course, Carl's mom is like, I know he a hoe. Basically, Carl's mom is like I know he a hoe basically Carl's mom wrote I'm with ho with a yeah an arrow pointing the Carl for every answer and Carl's answer is always like Jens it's like what? Hello Jens hey Jens hey Jens gentlemen so at Ronda's mortified when she finds out that Lindsay's had more than 20 sexual partners and Lindsay's like I'm a modern woman and a boss of that Let me know There's let me live sometimes Carle when the question it when the question you're really getting into your carol there

Just wanna by the way, Ronnie. thank you for having me on this podcast. Right now, I'm really glad we get a chance to talk so I can clarify some things about Carl. Uh, I don't believe in you. I don't believe in you. I don't believe in you. Um, when asked whether or not I've had, uh, 20 or more sexual partners, uh, I just answered more, more life, more life, more life.

That's like his thing. I think he took it from Drake. It was the name of like a Drake, my tape or something. And apparently he's been saying it all the time and just annoying everyone endlessly with it. I shut up Carl. Stop saying more life. Trust me.

No one is more annoyed than Drake. Drake's like, God, I just watch this. Drake actually watches summer house. Just just so we could shake his head at something. He's like, I'm in summer house. I like watching summer house. It's a good show.

Wait, they're using my line. Jens, he comes out with a song called Jens. That's a song called Jens. So Rhonda and Carl, Rhonda and Carl's mom takes selfies. Although I'm writing down everything as usual. And so as the parents start leaving, the dad, someone says to the dad, the work is dad.

They're like, you can hang and play some Uno. It's the time assuming it was Carl because I'm talking like that. And they're like, no thanks. How about you don't play Duo with either one of our trios or Duo daughters? How about you don't play trio with our duo? How about that, buddy?

Keep it in your pants there. So I feel all right, well thanks, guys. Yeah, well, thanks for giving me a chance to suggest who know I'm just trying to be a better game player for my mom. I just want to be the best version of who know that I could possibly be. Now I want to communicate better, do you know, and do numbers that match,

or color that match? Yeah, like I'm getting my mom to where she's staying. And like that's what's important right now. I'm like, what do you take care of the bus stop? What's important right now is that my mom has a travel version of Uno to take with her between the summer house and the holiday. Yeah, someone made a very good point on Facebook.

They were like wait Carl lives in a summer house but he made his mom take a bus for eight hours some of this isn't adding up guys yeah yeah I actually didn't want to go with there I was like I don't want to shame his sweet mother for having to take the bus but she also maybe just like a hippie sort of something another like oh cool I want to take the bus. Or maybe she just like just took the jitney because a lot of people take the bus from Manhattan and maybe the jitney for hours. It was like an eight hour, I don't know. She walked. She's like, well, you know, car out my feet hurt. I just don't know her journey. I don't know her journey.

Jett that it took eight hours. Yeah, it took a long time. It took a full day of work, which Carl doesn't know much about lately. You guys want my being somebody to Carl? I don't know because I'm just trying to be this version of himself. I try to be the guy. Sometimes it's like habit forming to just be a bitch just because it's like what I do. But you know, yeah, I appreciate you. Yeah, I appreciate you giving me the chance to basically do a work with Carl now. Yeah, what if Carl had a twin? Oh my god. I appreciate it. I appreciate it. I appreciate it. You appreciate it. You appreciate it. You appreciate it.

I appreciate it. You appreciate it. You appreciate it. I appreciate it. You appreciate it. You appreciate it. You appreciate it. You appreciate it. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, you know. And she's like, it's taking a long time to get here but I can finally say I'm over Carl. And it is very liberating, okay?

Carl, is it until liberating? Do you see how I'm over here? Do you like how liberated I am? Carl, have you ever been liberated? I totally liberated. Your liberation is, you know what? Deliberation is, do you ever hear about the liberation army?

You ever hear about that? No, Carl. Deliberation army, Carl. Carl, Carl, Carl, Carl. Carl, what about you? Carl, do you speak to Carl about liberation? Carl, Carl. Carl, you don't have to be a liberal, to you speak the Carl battle liberation? Carl, Kyle?

Let me, you don't have to be a liberal, to be a liberal, you know? You can be conservative and be liberal. Let me be liberal. We're all liberal. We're all liberal. It's definitely not being a man. Do you know the theory is, Kyle?

Do you know the theory is, Carl? Do you know it? Do you know it? Can you get cereal? Carl, Carl, Carl, Carl, Carl, Carl, Carl, Carl, Carl, Carl. Can we get a mic on this show, please? Just a mic call would be great. That would be great, guys.

You know, it's a lot of, a lot of cut sounds. Yeah, so cut and less sounds, actually, like, Kyle and Amanda's moms are a party. They just stay, because they're gonna have an unoparty or whatever the fuck they're playing. So they're like super party out, you know, and Kyle's like, my mom is nuts, okay? And it just made sense to let our moms crash.

They're gonna like bone probably. You know, I thought it would be crazy, wouldn't it? And the mom's like, you is nuts, okay? And it just made sense to let our moms crash. They're gonna like bone probably. You know, I thought would be crazy with it. And the mom's like, you, Kyle, you are what we call pussy with that mom needs her own show. I feel like it's a bold move to have future mother-in-laws not only meet for the first time, but sleep in the same bed. Yeah. Like that's, I thought it would be like, Kyle and his mom would sleep in a bed and then Amanda and her mom would sleep in the same bed. But no Like that's I thought it would be like Kyle and his mom would sleep in a bed and then Amanda and her mom would sleep in the same bed. But no, no, no, we still want to own tonight, even if Lindsay is sleeping in pillow away. Yes. I feel like you should really have your children get married before you intermingle your farts. I guess like the parents are just

getting too close now. They should've just done like a trolley on the trolley on the chocolate factory bed situation, you know, all four of them in it head to toe just there waiting for golden ticket Yeah, and Carl's like got you golden ticket kidding. Sorry. Sorry. Did that. Sorry. Welcome, Jens. Welcome to the factory There's a chocolate remember if it wants it. I've been on the chocolate move before Lauren knows about that, right? I heard Steve. I heard Carl. Okay, and you needed to say that was Stephen before he'd discussed you want to try to believe me. I'm talking about chocolate river with Stephen okay. Carl so they're playing games with their moms and Amanda's like it's like dating a real adult and then Kyle's like oh no yep so it's um so it's Sunday morning now and the woke up and Kaz mom is getting some sun and Amanda's

talking to her mom and Amanda's telling her mom that she thinks that Kyle could be the one, which is good because I think when you make guacamole, you want to make it for someone you love and you're going to be with for a long time. That's expensive. That's a commitment to make that fresh guac over and over again. You want to do it for the right person. She tells her mom nothing screams red flag. And then we get a montage of red flags.

It's like basically a bull run of red flags. We just see a screenshot from the iTunes door of Summer House season one for purchase. Don't know red it's lags. With a red picture. That's bigger on it. That's a black flag. So, Kyle comes out to talk to his mom and she's like, mom, are those sorts mom?

Jesus. That's good. Because at the new hamster, Bougaloo. And the mom's like, well, I was nervous before, you know, like that situation with last summer. And Amanda's like, well, where is such a good place now? I was like, so Danielle returns, which you could tell because everyone was like, why can't I breathe? It's like the air was just sucked out of the room.

Yeah. Sorry, Danielle. It's not nice, but I'm Danielle from Hoboken. Why am I apologizing to people? I don't know you. They're like, hi. Hi. I think they probably were excited to see Danielle because their other option was to look at Lauren and her ruffle bikini again.

Like, oh, like Lauren, she put on her ruffle bikini. I know you'd think they'd be like, Hi Danielle, hi, what are you doing? What's going on? But they just all, I think maybe it was editing or something because then it seemed like they were totally nice to her. Yeah, they were first. Yeah, they were giving her, it looked like

they were really giving her some shade. And especially Lauren, she was just giving her one long car. Is he giving her a car? She was gonna pull something out from underneath the ruffle and her bikini to be like, um Danielle I found this evidence about you But actually Danielle's first question was where's Carl? I was like really? Really Danielle? It's probably blowing wilder somewhere So we're in like we got a lot of catching up to do girl Carl put a wedge Carl

But a witch particularly me Danielle like a huge way. We know it's like a south all needed It's a blue team. It's a simple machine. No, it's a reasonable machine Right lever and police reasonable machines. Yeah, especially how are you saying that when you were the one that made Carl go Yellow her in the first place in this clip. You are crazy. Okay lady Like I can't believe Carl tried to do that to us and she's like go yell at her Carl go yell at her in the first place in this clip. You are crazy. Okay, lady. Her nuts. I can't believe Carl tried to do that to us and she's like, go yell at her Carl. Go yell at her right now. She's talking shit about Carl.

You can stand up for me. You can stand up for me. You can stand up for me. You can stand up for me. I'm going to take my hand. I'm going to take my hand. I'm going to take my hand. I'm going to take my hand.

I'm going to take my hand. I'm going to take my hand. I'm going to take my hand. I'm going to take my hand. I'm going to take my hand. I'm going to take my hand. I'm going to take my hand. I'm going to take my hand. I'm going to take my hand. I'm going to take my hand. I'm going to take my hand. talking shit about Carl. She's like, yeah, last night, we're all in the living room chatting. He doesn't even say hello. He goes upstairs, he ships down, starts to face having this woman. I said, I went up there, I was like, open the door, I was like, you're freaking

him for a while. And I like, I need to, I need to, I need to let it rip. I need to let a big one rip. I need to just like fart in his face. Big rip. I just had to get it out. He didn't want to say hi to the mom. He didn't want to say hi to any mother. He just was like, face having, I was like, Carl, what are you doing? I thought that she was actually making a real housewives of Atlanta reference for a minute because she's like, and I said, Carl, you're a frickin' fraud. I was like, whoa.

Viny has that copy right in, okay? Ma'am. I could tell my Ruffle Bikini started to stand up on it on stage. I was like, when that happens, that means that it calls for hiding someone. It's all like one of the others. I was like, oh, you bet seven.

Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. And Daniel's like, wow, all I've been wanting is a Carl-free Lauren since the beginning of summer. I'm like, she's not the guy's not Asper team, okay? Come on, guys, you guys are like over, I'm starting to feel bad for Kyle, which is really making me feel weird. I feel like there should have been one of those commercials. You know when a corporation does something good, they change their ways,

and they show like farms, and there's like a pleasant guitar playing and they're like We hear at Lauren workers of America understand the American way is about more than just earning a book It's about treating your customers right, which is why we're proud to announce that from now on Lauren workers is Carl free Yeah, it's like you're still spilling millions of gallons of gas into the Ocean, okay workers company ass into the ocean. Okay, work as a company. Yeah, that's when there's like an expose on like bussell.com turns out that the work as company isn't Carl free after all.

There's a loophole. In fact, they're Carl Moore. It turns out that only one division of the work as company is Carl free, whereas their international division is Carl Ful. Carl Ful, Carl Ful, Carl Ful, Carl. I like to call a board meeting Carl Ful, Carl Ful, Carl Ful, Carl Ful, Carl Ful. So it is Kyle's birthday on Sunday. So everyone's like, Sunday house party. And Kyle was like, I was thinking of a tea party, not to protest great Britain, but to protest growing up. I was like, you

can't protest things when you're like the most intelligent person in this house. Also, you can't protest growing up. Yeah. Also, no need to apologize. No need to clarify for anyone who's concerned that there'd be a great Britain protest. I think if you say I wanna have a Tea Party, then actually I would think that if you would, my first instinct was I thought there could be like little finger sandwiches and tea, like a real Tea Party. But I was like, I like the fact that he was like

very concerned that there might be some very ardent British people who were like, wait a second, that's not right. That's not right, we have anything to your country in 200 years. Why does everyone think Britain suck great? I don't know what's so great. I mean, what sort of United Kingdom only is an island? Like, are you aniting? So Carl's like, hey gang, hey gang of gents. He comes in the kitchen and everyone's just like everyone's

totally silent. They're all giving him the silent treatment. He's like, well, God take off. So, and Lauren's like, hmm, Carl looks a little rough. Yeah, looks like we're rough. He's like, he's been face to me a girl again. Huh? You know what? Look, he's got chest hair on his shoulders. Rob's really rough. Huh? Rob. Daniel's like, yeah, you know, it makes me feel bad when he has family stuff going on. But fucking yeah, Steven's like, we're going to the beach today. So don't eat too much because there's no bathroom at the beach unless you shit your pants. I'm gonna tell everyone about it.

Yeah, it's Carl's life. Yeah, I go back to city, got to get mom, go back to city Jens. Good to be a good son. Thanks for having me here this weekend. It was a great catch-cab, I'm just trying to be a better version of me, driving my mom to the city, being a better version of her. I'll take me.

I love you notice, but the really lame version of Carl walked into this kitchen, but a better version is leaving him to take his mom back home. So I'm mostly liturant. I bolted out of my bad version to my new version. I'm like a soft shell crab right now. So at the beach, the twins are like, oh my God, I can't believe you've been here two weeks. And you're going to go home.

I can't believe it. Oh my God, you're leaving? Don't leave me. I got to leave you. I can't believe you're the last two weeks to say. I'm like, I've been like, I need to be here. Actually, I'm trying to. Yeah, well, I'm going to be it. I'm like, I got really don't leave. I got to leave. I don't need to say. I'm like, I've been like, what is cold to be here? I should have tried a while.

Yeah, I'm gonna be here because I'm gonna push the wheel. Somehow, I'm like, the one who's cold, I'm like, I'm like, I'm sure I'm gonna be cold. I can't have this one. I'm like, what am I gonna do?

I'm like, I'm like, my four sister, I'm like, I'm gonna do something else. I'm like, I like to be cold. I'm like, I like to be cold.

I like to be cold. I like to be cold. So the gang and the gang are where are they back? I still think so to be. And then it's like too bad we didn't have everyone's parents there. Steven. And he's like, they went on a family vacation. And I wasn't invited because they don't like me.

So basically, we just keep our house work. I was like, aww. I feel bad for Steven, but I also feel like the family vacation was probably not anywhere good. I feel like the, like the brands, yeah, it was like to slitter bond or something, you know, like some water park. They probably asked him to go every year

and he's like, I'm not going to slitter bond, mom. We're going to the Alabama beach. It's like, I'm not gonna go. Fuck that. I'll just watch on House Hunters You know and House Hunters they're always buying someone's always buying like I want to buy I want to buy some beach from property, man, Alabama Every single time yeah, for guy. He's like, um, I wish my parents had been here. I would have loved to ask them how much sex I've had I'm a newlyweds game. So at the city, they're like, we're in the city.

The SSS city people in the city living in the city. To time. And then they show some lady talking to Steven. And she's like, here's what I have an idea for, Steven. I want a piece about holidays. And he's like, oh my God, like entertaining. And she's like, yes! Never did we see him from again.

And then we see the workuses and they're like, hey, we're matching. Oh my God, we're matching. You look like me and I look like you. It's like we're two twins, but we're the same person. You're like, we're not getting coffee. And she's like, you out line. I was like, oh my God, these people,

it's like watching 9 to 5. Yeah, they really, I mean, the lives that they lead are just so intense, you know, sourcing coffee, matching clothes, feeling older ladies. Lindsay goes to her therapist and I forgot, I think her therapist forgot who she was for a minute because she's like, hi, it's so good to see you. And then Lindsay started talking in her face just fell. She's like, oh, it's you. I see you. And then let's start talking in her face just foul. She's like, uh, it's you. I remember you

just like, Oh, I thought you were my postmates. I'm not getting lunch in my. I just crossed out single Lindsay and my legal pad last week. Who let you back in here? I wasn't sure who you were until you started doing the scales of justice and saying single Lindsay. I really need to get a place with security. This we work isn't working out for me.

So Lindsay's like, well, like, here's what's going on, that's where I'm at, where I'm at game, and that was great. And the therapist is like, great. So I'm a little nervous, like, my ex-boyfriend, I'm like, I'm like, my ex-friends with Kyle, I'm like, his good friends with Barbara, and hand-voted Avra to this party because he has a party because it's gonna be his birthday. And I'm like, single man, I don't think I'm winning. And I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like my mom broke my trust and I couldn't trust people again that I could trust a rock and then ever broke my trust and I know I'm like I can't trust over it but then I heard the voicemail and then I was like I can trust voicemail but then I lost my voicemail message on my I can't trust voicemail I'm like I've right to do the voicemail

I'm like I can't do it. Time's up. Time is up on this session. I've been here five minutes so. Oh my God. I gotta go to the Virgin Megastore to buy a DVD of who's the boss? Like, I don't think those things exist. I've got to call the suicide hotline.

I'm okay. I'm okay. Not for you. Okay, not for you. I'm done. So now we head back to Hamptons. Like that we just sped right by it. Because now we're back in Hamptons. And poor Danielle, she has to travel to the Hamptons like that we just sped right by it because now we're back in the Hamptons and poor Danielle

She has to travel to the Hamptons with Carl and Amanda. I mean not so bad not so bad about Amanda But Carl was such an asshole to Danielle and now she has to drive with him to the Hamptons for like four hours Well, he's probably singing like putting on Drake which is probably fine like Drake is great But it's probably Carl listening to Drake. It's probably like no worse. You know, you know, he's like best I ever heard, best I ever had. So go on, everyone.

Come on, Jen. Let's sing one to this new song, Jens. Jens, Jens, Jens, Jens, the Jens, Connor braids, it's Jens, Connor, Rachel Carl. Rachel. Like Carl, that's not even Drake. I know.

It's actually a submission. I'm going to, you know, I'm going to send it to Drake. See if he wants it. Jens, I'm going to put his call. It's like a, it's like even Drake. I know. It's actually a submission. I'm going to send it to Drake, see if he wants it. John's on a bridge. It's like a metaphor, you know, because it's like about crossing a bridge to a better version of yourself. I was, I was, we could cross this bridge into a rivers or like a lake. So we could call it Drake Lake. Get it. Get it guys.

Yeah. But yeah, I think Daniels used to him. Hold on, we're going home. Got it guys. We're going to some of our house.. Hold on. We're going home. Yeah, the guys we're going to some our house Just hold on we're going home Lake house Drake house. That's what I mean. Yeah, I'm hotline bling You used to call me on the weekends Danielle. See what I did there. Daniel Drake would talk to me

Drake would talk to me the kitchen. Yeah I've never wished Drake listened to our podcast more than this episode. You never know. I think I'm pretty sure he doesn't. I'm hoping it's like Jake and Marie Osmond and like Kristie Alley and Oprah. And Obama. I want President Obama too. Oh, well, that would be a dream.

Could you imagine? Could you a dream could you imagine could you imagine could you imagine We're like his guilty pleasure He's like well I love reading policy from Noam Chomsky and I Like listening to music by Jay Z and as my cousin pleasure. I listen to watch And as my cousin pleasure, I listen to watch rapids. Barack Obama. He's our patron.

He's like, I'm not, he's like, I haven't quite committed to patreon yet. But I always imagine him talking like Tom, because Obama has no not Tom Cruise. Tom to Tom Cole. Yeah. So he's like, well, you know, here's what I'm thinking for our country, guys.

I'll, well, you know, I would like to stick cooked a little bit better. Yes, we can. Yes, we can. If the state a little bit, you know, here's what I'm thinking for our country, guys. Well, you know, I would like to stick cooked a little bit better, yes we can. Yes we can. You could stick a little bit, you know, more well. A little bit better. Well, well, you know, hey, we have two DC shows coming up. Who knows what famous politicians we might be able to get to come to the DC improv? Spoiler alert.

Zero. Mr. Obama was going to come. Okay. I, I love fantasizing about that shit though, because it's so bonkers. Just to the magic of the improbability of this show, Obama. Ladies and gentlemen, the opening of the Obama presidential library. What's wrong, crap? Obama presidential library. Raising kids can be one of the greatest rewards of a parent's life.

But come on, someday, parenting is unbearable. I love my kid, but is a new parenting podcast from Wondry that shares a refreshingly honest and insightful take on parenting. Hosted by myself, Megan Galey, Chris Garcia, and Kurt Brown-Oller, we will be your resident not-so-expert experts. Each week we'll share a parenting story that'll have you laughing, nodding, and thinking. Oh yeah, I have absolutely been there. We'll talk about what went right and wrong.

What would we do differently? And the next time you step on yet another stray Lego in the middle of the night, you'll feel less alone. So if you like to laugh with us as we talk about the hardest job in the world, listen to, I love my kid, but wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen ad- free on the Amazon music or And after like, oh, here we are. We're heading out. We're heading out in the car with our favorite diver. Whoa. I mean diver driver Well, I said diver. I said diver what I really Like I'm like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be from Latin. I'm not like, I'm not like, he wouldn't just say, I'm just looking for a bullet. Just why do you need to be here? Like, I like putter.

And I'm also like, I'm also like, I'm like, I like the long-term. I think I'm also better than ever. But I just thought that right. Cause she said that ever since she came. I got worried though, it's all about things. Pull about things. I love when it ends and I'm like, what?

Mine often go in a different place. You know, it's funny, whenever we do that, I never listen to what you're saying. I'm just like, we're talking. We're talking. When we learn in school, you can listen to what you're saying I'm just like well I can't you we're talking then we learn in school you can't listen while you're talking oh wow he's a van der Prump taught me in school yeah so so Kyle is when they get to the Hampton's Kyle isn't there because he's in New Hampshire at

a family reunion and we see some footage from his cell phone where his grandma is just chugging champagne. I mean, the Kyle family reunion looks so fun. I think we saw some of it last year and it looked amazing and then you know it's like, you know they're like cooking hot dogs and like really good hot dogs and like burgers. Like a really good cookout. You know that smell, you know like,

you know like a really good cookout, how it smells so good you know like, you know like a really good cookout, how it smells so good. It's just like smoky and like hot dogs and burgers and ketchup and mustard. I feel like they just do that so well. They drink beers and play frisbee and then just get drunk. And then there's probably like some uncle

in like a light blue polo shirt with a visor on his drunk and falling over and it's like, it's me. Yeah. That's me and our family. I'm getting a visor. I like, I want to be part of that. I'm warning my nieces. I'm getting a visor learn to make some hot dogs because it's just about to get crazy. So we're in the kitchen with Steven, the twins and Lindsay and Ashley's like, oh my

god. Lindsay, are you focused on over? I mean, are you even going to it? It's like fundraiser thing tomorrow for like vets? Are you even going to that? Are you even going to his like fundraiser thing tomorrow for like that's are you even going to that? Are you even going? No, Last year I organized a whole of effort Erber and I tell really weird not going to there but erber and iron a different place Like I'm at the summer house and he's the event and it's like two different places. I'm like literally a different place I and it's like two different places. I'm like literally a different place. I continue to be thrown off by the way by Everett's event. This happened last season too.

His event is called HOH. And for those of us who love Big Brother, it's really hard to separate this out. I know, it's the house of wolves. I know, I'm like, I think you have to change the name of your event. I know, you were already eliminated from the house. You can't just hold your own HOH events outside the house. We also don't know what H-O-H stands for.

Like hugs for homeboys. Oh, hugs, oh homeboys. Oh yeah, that wouldn't make sense. Oh, hugs for homeboys. Who's H-O-H on the face? Hugs on the face. Maybe it's hugs on the voice. I'm sure it stands for, I mean, it seems like it's a very noble cause. It's for veterans, obviously.

But I just, I don't know what H.O.H stands for. Like, help our, oh, help our heroes. I think that's what it was. Oh, yeah, help our heroes. There we go. We did it. Each one hero gets eliminated every week. If they can't hold onto a phallic object,

as long as there are other heroes. Yeah, but if you can do it, you're safe for a week in the summer house. So Carl and Danielle and whoever arrives and mostly goes, hi, yeah. And Carl looks, he's not like not expecting Ashley because Ashley was supposed to be gone, but last weekend at the beach, that's when Lauren was like, please stay one more weekend. Come on, Ashley's to stay one more weekend. So when Carl walks in, he does that look where he's like, when he's really this is his eyes, just opening just has that weird smile. He's like, uh, he's start like a lick. He's left like, Hey,

Jens, low Jens. Hey, you guys, uh, you guys need help. Yeah, in the kitchen. And they just all ignore him. It's like that episode two weeks ago when he's like, you don't need all that makeup. You don't need all that makeup Love it love it love it. Yeah, that's great. Yeah, love it. Give me your way. Give me your way. Yeah, wait on me. But you're way down there. So it's like the thing I'm a piece of shit and I just want to be a better version of myself like you know Like my mom wants me to be like no I think baby steps is getting a plane ticket for your mom. First of all, yeah, that's a good.

He's a good version. I think the plane ticket buying version is the best. So Ash is like, where's cheese? And I was like, oh, are we progressing away from where's Charles? Where's Carl to where she's? Where she is? Cheers. Cheers.

That's right. What she does with her twin when she's at home with Brad just walks around the house going. Cheese. Cheese. Cheers. Or cheese. Cheers. My way, my next, my next note is literally. when she's at home with Brad, just walks around the house going cheese cheese cheese cheese cheese cheese cheese cheese cheese from Roseanne I was so disappointed when it was actually a DJ. I was like, or DJ Tanner. Yeah So she's like um so Danielle's like, I'm so getting laid because I'm Danielle from Hellboken

And she's like, okay, so in the kitchen They're still cooking and Carl comes up to learn he's like, can we chat? She's like, um, maybe after dinner, Carl, I don't know if you've noticed, but I'm in a beautiful dress that has nothing to do with you being here, and I'm making some dinner because I'm giving people sustenance, which you never gave me in our relationships. So, yeah, now it would be great. But by the way, Lauren was like cooking something on the stove top.

Like, can you just wait till it's done? That's your food. that's your food. That's your food. All right, Carl. What do you want to talk about? It's like 10 of them in the kitchen. She's like, I'm sparing this alboholic macaroni Carl. So they sit down outside and Carl's like, well, thank you for even talking to me.

I appreciate the invitation to come in and interview at this fitness position here with Lauren Workas Industries. I know this is a call free company, but I would like to maybe suggest a way to incorporate a carl into your business proceedings because I've had a lot of anxiety for the past two weeks because Steven, I said something to Steven, and I'm like, you can be on that. Steven, well look, I'm well aware of what that is, okay? I'm well aware of what that is. It's to do with both jobs and I don't even care about my story to tell I don't even care about that so like a humbly like a version talk like Steven like I'm over at Carl. Okay. But you wait on me. But you wait on me.

Carl's like my mom talked about divorce and then my friend called me and talked about divorce and she like, you know what? You can you can talk to me until you're blue in the face Carl. Okay. I don't believe you And he's like, you don't believe me. No, I don't believe you like if that was the case then why wouldn't you come downstairs to be like? Was he saying that that's what that face time call was about? Yes, this is so here's a thing. So here's why Carl is problematic. Because he's basically saying, you know, that was a private thing and the reason why I lied is because that's not Steven Stewart-A-Tel.

It's my sort of tell, which he has a point. He does have a point, but then he undermines himself because he starts bullshitting immediately afterwards. He says, and by the way, the reason that I grew up, you heard me talking to like, my mom told me to divorce. I was trying to process, so I decided to call a friend and just like to talk about it, to like have a heart to heart. And she's like, no, I heard the whole thing, Carl,

like you guys were flirting and like, open your ears and listen, we had our mothers in town. I talked to us and say, besides see your mother, like, why don't you come in and talk to us and say hi, but I said you wanted to face time and go show your abs world girl, Carl. But that's not the way it works, Carl. It's like, I'm single, I can do whatever the fuck I want.

So yeah, but then you tell me you're working on yourself and et cetera, et cetera, I'm working on self-surfing. My ear, I am. I am. I am. What did I say? It's wrong, Jens. Well, he's right.

Of course he's single. He can do whatever he wants. But stop fucking lying all the time. Well, that's the thing. Well, that's the thing. That's the thing. I think I've been trying to articulate it over the past few weeks, which is that he, you know, he, he, and a lot of people do this, especially a lot of guys, they sort of create these

baseline rules, which is, listen, I'm single, I don't want any strings attached, and if you get attached, that's on you, because I've already established, I don't want strings attached. And then they do all sorts of things to make people feel like they're actually strings attached, and it's like, and then when they do get strings attached, and it's like, wait, a second, I thought something's going on, I was like, no, sorry, it's on you. they're actually strings attached. And it's like, and then when they do get strings attached, and it's like, wait a second, I thought something's going on. I was like, no, sorry, it's on you. I said no strings attached. That's your problem to deal with.

And that's like real fuckery. I'm sorry. Like Lauren should know better, but ultimately, you know, Carl does not get off easy. He is a master of fuckery. Yeah, well, cancer admits that it's cancer, but it still needs to be cut out. Okay, Carl So there you go. That's my feelings on that. And then of course he starts doing all the facile apologies

He's like he's like I'm sick of it. I can talk to you. Well, I like listen. I honestly learn I thought that we could be friends and be it likes to like move on from this bullshit and just have like more life But like I know I fucked up. I know I'm an asshole. That's what I am. Yeah, I'm mature I'm like a total asshole, you know, cuz my dad blah blah. It's rather etc It's like oh yeah, well I had emotional blanters on cuz you and I'm gonna hold myself to a higher standard Carl I'm up here Carl. Okay. I'm like up here Carl and he's like okay, well I was a fan of your car. I was a fan of you and yeah, and you didn't do it like you didn't do anything Help yourself Carl Carl and you guys I had no idea how much I hurt Lauren till I talk to her right now.

It's like really? There's still flies on the crashed waterbell in upstairs. But how many times does she have to like fling open your bathroom door and yell you while you're brushing your teeth? How many can you really see in your face? No, seriously. And he's like, well, you know, I just don't, it's like, maybe I'm doing this because I'm becoming my dad. And I don't want to be like my dad. I'm like, oh, wait, wait, wait, let's all feel sorry for you because your parents are getting divorced.

And this is, it makes me fucking blind. And then they show, I don't, well, not when he does shit like this, you know, he uses it to like, I think he uses it to excuse, like a torches slide, like two seconds ago. He's like, yeah, but I'm a tortured soul like shut up But we did get an answer to a mystery which is we saw crowd or Carl is a teenager and I was like, whoa That's why he's getting laid so much now. Yeah, yeah, he looked a little bit too much like me as a teenager And I felt very uncomfortable with that. Oh Sorry no offense. I'm not like saying ugly or anything, but he was like a doofy kind of teenager

Yeah, and now he's Carl so girl Oh, sorry, no offense. I'm not like saying ugly or anything, but he was like a doofy kind of teenager. Yeah. And now he's Carl. So, girl, it's like me if I lose two pounds, I'll be fucking half this neighborhood. Yeah. No, I mean, I just, I think that like, I would not take away from him the emotional stress of watching your parents break up. Like that's very difficult.

I would not take that, I don't take that away even from Carl. I don't take away the fact that he probably is reliving his dad's patterns because it's hard not to fall into the same patterns of your parents. But what I do take away is the bull. What I do, what I will take away is acting like saying things like you're just trying to be the better self. All these smooth canned responses that just lacks in service. Yeah, it's just when people lie that like it

it's like they lie they keep fucking up and then they're like yeah I'm hurt because of this like it doesn't matter like you don't get to keep using that fucking excuse right after you did something you know it makes me nuts and I've said that multiple times this week about multiple shows and then I probably have

excused myself because of whatever child oh yeah oh yeah we always like to keep the mask we're the master choosing's like the key to the way guys. Oh, we're the master. We're the master choosing ourselves. Like, we talk to you about all these people on Bravo and then say, but you know, it's just like, we're just reacting to like cartoons on TV. That's it.

We're not really coming after you. Like, I don't know. It's really has to do with like, my issues with my dad. I'm like, dude, we got to do with my podcast issues. Gents like, our podcast is going through a lot. We're just trying to be the best podcast in the possible. Yeah, like Skype call recorder, totally like messed up. Not a one of us up like Skype call recorder.

You know that we're just trying to be the best version for, you know, iTunes, you know, so that I said Steven are in bed talking and she's like, oh my god, Steven, can you even look Carl in the eyes? Can you think of him in the eyes, Steven? And he's like, no. I can't. Oh, so Stephen's got a blind date and she's like, oh my God, that is so big of you, dating a blind person. Like, that's you. It's like, have you thought about it? Where'd you find them? I mean, I mean, it's not grinder. I mean, to the headphones, we're like, you can figure that out. Yeah, he's like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, my God, I feel so stupid. That's how long I've been with Brad. Okay. I don't even know what dating is anymore. That I have

to go pick dates. Like I don't know. Like you can get dating is like literally picking dates and watching them dry. Okay. Well, I wait for Brad to get home. Yeah, it's like literally going through your sheets and circling the dates on the receipts for taxes. That's what dating ends to me. So yeah, he's going to have a blind date tomorrow. And meanwhile, Lindsay and Carl are talking about Avrat, and Lindsay's like, so you're gonna see Avrat tomorrow? Like, I don't know how I feel about him coming to the party tomorrow. Like, do you think that maybe you could like stop him from coming to the party?

Because I don't know if I want to see Avrat, okay? She actually goes, I tried to write it down. I think Lindsay's a couple of drinks in now because she starts talking like Drunk Single Lindsay, where she's like, I'm sure everyone will be mad in Wednesdays. Like, what? And he's like, if you're so concerned about that, then don't let it happen. Don't let him come over.

And she's like, um, then let go. Then you go tomorrow and stop it because I'm going to you. So now he's supposed to tell ever he can't come. Yeah, no, the car is definitely not going to do that. And he shouldn't have to do that. So what's happening? My next is just been going against everybody saying that everybody's mad at Carl for stuff that's not their business.

He's like, well, well, we're at it. Tell ever he can't come. Yeah. So the twins are recapping Carl. They're recapping the updates on the latest updates in Carl. And as she's like, you know, it's funny. Like when I came here, like three weeks ago, I thought like Lauren, you'd be like,

in such a bad emotional state, but like actually, you're doing like, well, and like, I can tell, I'm like, you're really good. Like, really, really good, right? Really, really good. Like, I got that on the way. Like, I'll be like, I don't know, but Carl's like, you gave me her hat.

And Carl's just on the street, like, crazy. He has a crazy way. He's like, he's on the show, but like, I'm not't know how but I cross like you get your hat and cross just on the street like crazy. He's crazy. Yeah, he's like I'm so like I'm so good and I think you're doing so great. Yeah, I'm really missing like in California and then I mean you're so much where am I like in the brass gap like a bus Lauren is doing the runway with her tid out, which means it's just a party. I'm really liberated from the Carl world. So liberation. Woohoo. So everyone's partying and it's great because everyone's partying and being drunk and Carl's in his bed He's trying to sleep for his five keg. He's probably like quiet. Gents. Uh, I mean, can't say that. I'll Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. I just went off FaceTime because like it was quiet.

I needed some quiet, so I asked the world to show me your tips. I won't FaceTime, so. I just want to thank everyone for giving me the opportunity to not sleep before my 5K. I appreciate that. I wanted to have sleep, but you guys were so loud that it actually kept me awake and I thought that was a really valuable experience for me. So thank you so much. So everyone else goes me a wig and I thought that was a really bad luck to be honest for me. So thank you so much. So everyone else goes out to party and I love that the town hates them.

So that's that they won't let them party. They won't let cameras come in. So they're always parting in the dark on the cell phone. Cam and then it's like, okay, that's over back at 4 15 16. 17 a.m. And then it's like 8 a.m. And I'm like, where do you party until 8 a.m. in the Hamptons?

I'm sorry. Where where does that happen? I know in New York, like, you know, bars close at four, but like what happened when a bar what the bars close at four in the Hamptons? Like what do you do? Do you just like? Just set a bonfire outside of Inaigarra and tell us and we heard it come out. Hopefully, oh my god, that just made me want to go to the Hamptons and I hate that. I mean, he's like You know like totally into the Hampton's now so in the middle of the night Amanda's talking to Kyle on the phone And she just falls asleep. Yeah, she treats him like a bean dip and just falls asleep while he's talking She's like all right Kyle for the 10th time you take two avocados

Some onion Just use the fork Kyle just you think for I'm just using four-crow. Just using four. It doesn't, you don't need all the ingredients. It's like a rustic tip. But Kyle. So now it's time for Kyle's product. Wait, is it Kyle's product? Well, it's the morning and we hear one of the workers is like, didn't I want to hear a call this morning?

Didn't we hear a call? Didn't we hear a call? I think I'll go, gosh. It's not Kyle's party, but he does arrive at Saturday because remember, he was, he won't go back like the crack of dawn to come down to New Hampshire. Oh, yeah. So, yeah, so he shows up and he's like, Hey, everybody, it's Kyle. And they're like, hi, Kyle.

Hi, Kyle. He's like, what's a plan, Stan? I like the Kyle's like, I'm'm gonna stay young forever and then uses mom things like what's the plan Stan yeah and Ashley's like well Stan is Steven because he has a hot date with the black person possibly and yeah so then Carl's at the race and he's like oh here we are Jones look forward to supporting the cause and then Lindsay and Dan Daniel deals trying to do this thing where she's budding up to Lindsay and just, she just keeps following Lindsay around going,

how are you feeling Lindsay? How are you feeling? And Lindsay's like, oh, I'm seeing Oliver for the first time in the age of eight. So, you know, I'm seeing him on the H.O.A. trace on the Instagram. He's so cute. And I mean, he has to prove himself to me, but like to do that, I have to let him prove himself to me, which means like, I have to see him, which means me Which means like I have to see him which means he has to be here So how do we get hold of that right? How do we go?

I'll never stop that brain Danielle's already on the train back to our book and she's like I never mind We won't stay from Rosanne Yeah, I also want to point out that when they were talking about Stephen going on this day They're like just even a what how do you feel feel about the day he's like I'm excited. So white party and like recreating scenes from get out and there's a song. The song goes I might be a little bit different. I'm like you're white people at a white party dressed in white. Like you're not different at all. Like this is the least amount of different you could do right now. Yeah, and then she's like Kyle, I'm not gonna be at

our birthday party. I got to take a flight the next morning. Kyle, Kyle, where's Kyle? I'm just like, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, yeah. So then we go see Steven State. And I love that the waiter is like, fuck you guys blur out my face He's like I only keep my face on camera for Ina not you too So Steven looks totally terrified. He's like He's like making extreme non eye contact. You can just sort of see He's like doing whatever he can not to like crane his neck and look all the way to behind him, you know And this guy Travis shows up. He's like in a ratty t-shirt.

I'm like, okay, so no one's putting in a lot of effort on this date, are they? Well, it's probably like a $500 t-shirt knowing the Hamptons gaze. It's true. This gay is so cute. He looks like a little gay effort. Did you notice that he looks exactly like Everett?

Oh my God. He's little gay effort. And he's like, he's like, hey Geeks. Hey Geeks. I just had like the hardest time getting over here. It was just like the worst traffic. And I was like, Geeks, I've gotta go see a date. I'm gonna go and get through this.

I've been like, order a mojito. And you know what, trauma, make go through to get into a mojito let me tell you about that so um Steven's like you know what I'm just not cool like I'm trying to be cool but I'm just not cool so just get me a shot of fireball and then he spills at the interview room and you hear a crack in this class I love you so they're sitting there and they're like the most low energy

date. It's like, how was your day? It was good. Um, the weather's nice. Yeah, it's nice. I like when it's sunny. I like when it's sunny. I think everything's so cute. I loved him. He seems so nice. So the other group, the rest of the group is at dinner now and Karl arrives. He's like, oh, it's me. Hey, Jens. It's like a better Carl. Guess what? He's going to be even better by budget. Third time. So.

Saturday's over the boys. Yeah. Yeah, Jens. Saturday's over the boys. Learned about the sports scene. It's so weird. Well, I liked it up because it's like a thing. So there's this thing called bar stool sports, which I didn't really know about because I mean, even though I like sports, I am not a straight dude who likes sports. And it's like a gigantic blog podcast thing that like I think Michael Rapp report is involved with them. And Jackson's wearing a t-shirt that said Saturdays for the boys and had the bar stool on it this week on

Vanderpump Rules. And basically, it's a phrase that they kind of coined and became a meme. It's like Friday's for the men. Friday's for the men and Saturday's for the boys. It's like typical carlism, you know? So it's like a super, it's like a super carl thing. So that's the thing. Oh, okay. Saturdays for the boys. Yeah, Saturday's for the boys. And Daniel's like, well, guess what? I have a tea, Jane. He's coming in five minutes. He's like, oh, you nervous.

She's like, yeah, kind of. I was like, don't. Cause Saturdays for the boys. Yeah, Saturdays for the boys. I'm nervous. So we go back to the date where things are like going from cold to lukewarm and see like, so are you from. I hear it.

So you live in a house with all guys.'s cool Travis is like yeah it's like I don't even know any house so if it would be great like where the strike what we do have a pool and we have an industrial grade margarita machine it's my friend Klaus it's like, well, what's your is? And he's like, uh, humor, humor, judgment, balcony, good luck. I like that. And then it looks like this date's going terribly. And Stephen's like, yeah, this is a great date. I like that. Stephen frowns when he's happy, he smiles when he's angry. Yeah. Yeah. It's a really good like psychological kind of looks around at the same time. He's like, oh, when he's angry. Yeah. Yeah. It's a really good psychological game. It kind of looks around at the same time.

He's like, oh, oh. So he's like, you should come to the party. The game guys like, yeah, the gay guy. Gay ever. It's like, yeah, sounds fun. Travis. So let's see. We want to back at the white party.

Oh my god, Steven, you're not count. How was that? Woo. So back at the white party, Daniel's date Kevin finally Oh my god, Steven, you look count. How was that? So back at the White Party Danielle's date Kevin finally shows up who's also super cute and he's like It's like so I see that we have a table full of wasp people. I want to up that a little bit So here I am. I was like, what is this DJ gonna play? It's gonna be like all Guster in OAR And I say that as someone who owns several gustor CDs so I'm being self-deprecating.

So they're too tired to go out after everybody's been out all day and Steven's like aren't returning up and she's like we're tired Steven okay I have a five o'clock I have a five o'clock back to Brad so in the bedroom Amanda is telling Kyle. Kyle. This is the last time I'm taking your shoes off Kyle. Okay. He's like five years away from 40. And then they bone. And then they show Dan yelling Kevin, the DJ, who is really cute. And they hit it off. Obviously. And they're boning at the same time. And then it goes back to Amanda and Kyle. And she goes, Kyle, you are the minute man. And then it goes back to Amanda and Kyle and she goes, Kyle, you are the minute man. And then it goes back to the day when you're still loving out.

Yeah. His dick is just flopped out. There's like a blur going on. So the next day is Kyle's birthday. Yeah, Ashley leaves. And then they're all like inflating things. And like the women are putting on their makeup and Lindsay's like I'm sure that's a thing.

A bra. A bra. A bra. A bra. They're all getting into costumes like they're all getting to like powdered wigs and everything and I was like this is cool and everything but like I would never ever ever wear these costumes to a pool party in the middle of summer in the Northeast.

Probably hot. Hell no. Hell no. It was too hot. And Kyle's, of course, making a bouncy house. And secretly, by the way, I thought that, secretly, I thought that Kyle and Danielle looked fantastic and powdered wigs. I thought it was like a really strong work for both of them.

They really worked those powdered wigs. Yeah. So Stephen gets a call from his mom, and he's just wring his like, do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do whatever the ring was Yeah, it was like yeah, it's that standard call and then I just like was born It's always like hi mom. I'm like hey, Stephen We just want to know if you'll be able to come home for a visit before the kids go up to school and the fall and he's like, oh, okay. I can look for flights today or tomorrow and let you know. And she's like, well, that would be nice. We love you. And he's like,

but then he's like, that was like, he's smiling, you know, so he's like touched. But that's so cute. And that's like the confusing thing about all this. I guess we'll figure it out when he goes to see his parents because he says they don't like him and they don't accept him, but then they're so nice to him. They seem to really love him, so I'm so confused. It's probably that we love you. Just not your Gain-ish. Okay.

You know, we love dinner, but we like you to wash your germs off your hands before you eat it. You know what I mean? We're not gonna starve you. If we just want you to clean up a little bit. Meanwhile, Amanda gives Kyle a laptop case for his birthday. She's like, see, now you can be like a real business man. You have an actual laptop case, and you can be more grown up and take off your own shoes for once. She's like, he's like, oh, cool. This belt, I'm literally getting a boner from this Felt Fabric on this. And here's a gift.

It's like everything I wish you were, okay? And he's like, oh my God, that's so nice. Hugs. So Steven and Ashley, she's basically like, you better go see your parents, okay? They're made in Africa. Lauren's doing it. And then Steven gets an address, like he's full on Queen of Hearts drag, which is Perth.

Yeah. I like that his parents, his mom called while he was in a wig. I'm sure that was like his biggest nightmare like if my mom knew that I was a super gay that we're a war wig. And of course, you would call right now. She's like, hey, do you want to do this on the iPad? He's like now, mother. No.

He's like, hey, do you want to do this on the iPad? He's like, no, mother. No, he's like, no, definitely not. So of course, gay average shows up and he's looking really cute and Steven comes out. He's unveiled on the judgement balcony, which is perfect. And he goes, yeah, let's party, mother fuckers. Yeah. And Lindsey just go, she's just nervous. She's like, I don't know what's gonna happen when a riot shows up Like I don't know if I'm gonna like jump him or run away or anything like that like I don't know And like you just see like a circle just clearing away from her. It's like it's like in signs like a crop circle Just clears out And then or it comes in he's like oh

Whoa Radkey clears out. And then Ervert comes in, he's like, oh, whoa, Radke. Whoa, yeah, it's Radke. Hello, Mr. Radke, or should I call you Geek? Wow, I'm glad I'm out of my platoon. Oh, I'd say whoa, but I guess I should say, oh, because you did so greatly a marathon today, Radke. You don't know what I had to go through to put on this. Geek costume. Had to go to the store that didn't have it on the left. And I was like, wow, wow. Did all the geeks take all the costumes.

Did you notice that Wind Lindsay was like, oh my god, it's over. And she was talking about over it. They closed up on a couple of guys who were just grabbing their nets. It was the weirdest thing. But I thought it was so funny that that's what they zoned in on.

It's like, oh God, Lindsay's talking about Everett. They just show two guys adjusting their nets at the same time. I, of course, was just focusing on the fact that he was in a patriotic costume, a powdered wig, patriots costume, but also wearing espatrials. I was like, hmm, pick a Lainer of Earth. Well, that brings us to the end of an episode of Summer House.

Oh, we did it. So you guys, for a nice, select group of you, we're going to be seeing you in Houston tomorrow. We are excited to be talking about some Beverly Hills. And then, oh gosh, tonight is the finale of Top Chef. So Ron and I are going to try to watch it together in Houston and Do an episode and have that up tomorrow for y'all. Hey, oh yeah, everybody Don't forget to buy tickets to well, you can still buy tickets for Houston

We really recommend that you come and then of course for our other shows Next ones up our Detroit and Irvine. We have some cool stuff lined up. We're trying to get in the works for for those shows. So do that and also participate in our little board game contest on Instagram. So yeah, everybody. Yeah. We'll see you soon, Tejas. Love you guys. Talk to you next time. Bye. Hey, Prime members, you can listen to Watcher Crappens Add Free on Amazon Music, download the Amazon Music app today. Or you can listen Add Free with Wondry Plus in Apple Podcasts before you go tell us about yourself by completing a short survey at Wondry.com slash survey. and add free with Wondry Plus and Apple Podcasts. Before you go, tell us about yourself

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