Watch What Crappens - Summer House: Don't Rock the Gloat

Episode Date: May 17, 2023

*Also avail as video on Crappens On Demand http://bit.ly/crappensvideo* Carl has a fit on this week's Summer House and leaves the set, taking Lindsay with him. Will this temper tantrum get him booted off our TVs for good? And why is Danielle fighting about hates? This week's bonus is a full recap of Bravo's new show: Dancing Queens. For bonus episodes and video recaps, join Patreon at patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens Tour Dates: https://www.watchwhatcrappens.com/2023-cheater-brand-tour/See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hey, Prime members, you can listen to watch what crap ends at free on Amazon Music. Download the app today. This episode is sponsored by Uber1. We've all used Uber for rides, and I love using UberEats for food delivery. Okay, hello. I mean, I kind of live off of it. But have you ever heard about Uber1? Uber1 is a membership that helps you save on Uber and UberEats. With an Uber-1 membership, you get exclusive member perks, like up to 10% off UberEats and a $0 delivery fee on eligible orders. It just makes sense. I'm always getting Uberes.

I'm always doing UberEats. This is the perfect sort of membership for me. I use this all the time. Some restaurants charge so much for the delivery fee, and I order a ton of food. I've saved hundreds of dollars using this. One membership to save on Uber and Uber Eats. Join Uber 1 today. Go to uber.com slash Uber 1 to learn more. Zero-dollar delivery fee and percentage off discount subject to order minimums and participating stores.

Taxes and other fees still apply. Introducing the new audible original breakthrough. The genre redefining audio only series that strips away the superficial to reaffirm what matters most, pure talent. Featuring celebrity judges Kelly Roland, Sarah Bareilles, and host David Diggs. Here every step of the musical journey has five underscored musicians battle through a series of high stakes singing and songwriting challenges for one top spot. It's musically gifted as they are artistically unique?

Each finalist is driven by the same dream, to become music's next must listen. But to break through they'll have to dig deep, pushing their vocal, songwriting, and recording chops their absolute limits while keeping their feet and emotions firmly grounded. So who will break through? It's time to find out! Join Kelly, Sarah, and David on a musical journey unlike anything you've ever seen. This is Breakthrough. Listen on Audible or wherever you get your podcasts. Go to audible.com slash breakthrough. Follow along using hashtag BreakthroughXAudible. I'm not a cramp, I'm not a cramp, I'm not a cramp, I'm not a cramp, I'm not a cramp, I'm not a cramp, I'm not a cramp, I'm not a cramp, I'm not a cramp, I'm not a cramp, I'm not a cramp, I'm not a cramp, I'm not a cramp, I'm not a cramp, I'm not a cramp, I'm not a cramp, I'm not a cramp, I'm not a cramp, I'm not a cramp, I'm not a cramp, I'm not a cramp, I'm not a cramp, I'm not a cramp, I'm not a cramp, I'm not a cramp, I'm not a cramp, I'm not a cramp, I'm not a cramp, I'm not a cramp, I'm not a cramp, I'm not a cramp, I'm not a cramp, I'm not a cramp, I'm not a cramp, I'm not a cramp, I'm not a cramp, I'm not a cramp, I'm not a cramp, I'm not a cramp, I'm not a cramp, I'm not a cramp, I'm not a cramp, I'm not a cramp, I'm not a cramp, I'm not a cramp, I'm not a cramp, I'm not a cramp, I'm not a cramp, I'm not a cramp, I'm not a cramp, I'm not a cramp, I'm not a cramp, I'm not a cramp, I'm not a cramp, I'm not a cramp, I'm not a cramp, I'm not cramp, I'm not a cramp, I'm not a cramp, I'm not a cramp, cramp, I'm not cramp, cramp, I'm not a cramp, I'm not cramp, Well, hello and welcome to what's what happens to podcast rule that crap we love to talk about.

I'm Yo browse. I'm Ronnie. How are you everybody? Welcome Ben. Please to the podcast. Ben, please approach the podcast. Hi, sorry. My audio had dropped out, but it just came back everyone.

I don't know what you just said, but I'm assuming you said, please welcome Benjamin Mantleker. My co-host. My lovely co-host, the podcast. Was I not being supportive enough? You just quit the podcast. You pulled the carl in a Lindsay. I'm gonna take this anymore. I'm a lot more.

For some reason, my headphones did not come through on the recording software, so it was like, well, you're quiet right now, and I'm just gonna get a my key and drive away from this podcast right now. It's like I need, don't need this negativity. Sorry for that awkward, dead silence everyone. I'm just...

Well, welcome everybody. Great episode of Summer House to recap today. Just a couple of quickies before we get into it, guys, we're on tour. We are finishing our tour in June. We're so excited. Huge, huge stops for us. This is where we're going. It's going to be how many shows six shows six final cities in one month. It's going to be that's San Diego, St. Paul, Chicago, Columbus, Boston, and the big finale at the Foxwoods Casino in Connecticut. That's gonna be Hitch.

So go get your tickets over at watchwickcrapins.com. Also, that's where you'll find links to our Patreon. That's where you will find our videos on demand. Once they have been recorded, they are posted on crap and on demand and nowhere else. Now, we are about to have humongous changes to our Patreon, which is also where we post weekly bonus episodes. Huge, they are huge.

Huge, so huge changes. Go sign up for it. It's gonna be great. And also we've got huge free announcements coming up for people who are sick of listening to us ask for fucking money. We are about to give a lot of shit to you for free. So just stay tuned, we will do that

in this week's Vanderpuff Rules recap, which should be coming out, I don't know, a couple of days. So check back for that news, and we'll talk to you there. Ben, how are you doing today? What's going on in your world? What's going on in your life? I'm doing well. I was just reflecting about the fact that we have only six live show dates left

or all in June, June is Pride month. And so I think we can all come to the conclusion that if you don't come to our shows that literally makes you homophobic. You take gay people off with that. You have to live with that, especially because I think our shows in Chicago and Columbus may be happening during Pride.

So you'll be extra homophobic if you don't come. Because you could be going to a Pride event, but I feel like you could be just even more homophobic to us. I'm just going to say that. Yeah, let's get it guys. Look, we know that we have fewer gay guys than we do women, but listen, we are your gay best friend, ladies. You better show up on a private date for us, okay?

Also, if you don't come to support us in private, you're not only homophobic, you're anti-Semitic. And I love an use. You're anti-Libbidic. For 11 people as well, okay. I would also say you're not as much of a dog person as you say you are. Yeah. You've got dogs. Ronnie's dog, Bueller is a supporting character on this podcast. That is something that people on

video know because Bueller is always in the background right now. He's snapping and I don't have a Bueller. Okay. I don't have a Bueller in my background. My background has just been like I have a window behind me and I like sometimes I'll have the shades open, hoping that a gardener comes through and it makes my side of the video look more interesting if the gardener never comes through when I'm here. And so then I close my blinds and it just looks like I'm in a cloud.

So today, I decided I was gonna take things into my own hands and make my side of the video look more interesting. I have two celebrities in my video in the background, Carl and Kyle, having a fight in the parking lot, orange tinted in summer house. It's a screenshot, but you know what? It's really making me feel like alive on this recap.

Yeah, you look fabulous, you look great by the way. You look horrible, you look horrible. You look incredible. You look incredible. Carl Carl, I think Ben, caro, caro. Jumps. More life. You know, I think like the knowledge that I have a Kia, just like 25 feet away in the

garage, really makes me feel connected to Carl and then you're right now. So like I'm just like feeling it all. Like if, hey, Ronnie, if you're like not nice to me in this episode, I'm just going to get my Kia and drive away for like two days. Okay. Oh my god. Who knew the Kiao was gonna become such a fucking power bottom on Bravo.

Oh my God. By the way, I actually know it might take away from this episode of Summer House, was that I almost texted you Ronnie, except for the fact that it was late at night, although that didn't stop me from texting you, so you can get me else totally random. I'm gonna answer shit.

My takeaway is this, watching this episode, we have had this like ongoing never-ending argument, Danielle, Arlenzied, Danielle, Arlenzied, Danielle, Arlenzied, Caroll, the two of us have gone back and forth. It's not affected anything because it's a stupid, fun argument, but we've gone back for people on the internet are going back and forth. Then you watch this episode and you realize, guess what? All three of these people are idiots and they're terrible.

We've wrapped ourselves up in their stupid drama and we're at everyone else, everyone on the internet is at each other's throats. For what everyone? Why are we at each other's throats for these three people, these three schmucks? We also forget, I was thinking, you know, look, we also forget what a shithead Carl is

as you just pointed out, like everybody's just letting Carl off. And you know what? Carl's getting that sober at it where it's like someone sober and so we infantilize that person. And we're like, oh my God, everything they do is right because they stopped drinking for a year. Listen, that time is over, okay? Because Carl is still acting the same goddamn ways he was when he wasn't sober.

It's just he's not, he doesn't have the drunk parts in there. You know, it doesn't change your entire personality. Carl's still a big fucking baby when he doesn't get his way. He has a fit. He is. He also the woman and then he fucking, and then he takes his toys and he goes home and tell people, start kissing his ass again. Oh, and you know what else? Carl, you feel lonely.

You feel like nobody is supporting you. Justice for jewels, motherfucker. How do you think it felt when you turned the entire house against one girl? By the way, a woman of color, one of the only ones ever on this show at that time. You turned everybody against that girl and told her, oh, you just don't fit in. We're not going to hang out with you. And then suddenly everybody's not up your asshole because, ooh, you made the incredible jump to propose to somebody.

Go fuck yourself, Carl. And that's been missing from these season recaps, okay? And I didn't realize it until yesterday. So here's a nice big one. Good fact, yourself, Carl. Okay. It's not like Carl, when he was drinking was like, oh, he was like a famous drunk, right? He's not like a, like when the whan was drinking,

the whan was like, oh, it's like, oh my god, the WAN drinking falling in bushes or like, D'Arenda or them, like, where the alcohol or Leah, like, the alcohol really impacts their personality. It's not like you think of all those funny memories of Carl getting wasted. It's more like, he has since adopted a lot of, you know, therapy speak and group help speak.

And it's just sort of like watching him just wake up and go to berries, which I feel like in some ways is good for him. But it masks the fact that he still is like, well, this is just a lot of knocker to it or whatever. He's still self-interested, I believe. He's totally self-involved and narcissistic. And listen, I've said it a million times on this show.

Don't trust too many people. They don't therapy too much. Now look, I know we love therapy on this show. I go to it when I need it. I love therapy. Here's the problem. When people who are real assholes go to therapy, they just learn new ways to manipulate you.

They learn a new way of speaking that they're still able to manipulate you, but they're using coded language so that they can't get called out on it. And we all know that that's true because anybody who's gone to therapy has learned to do that themselves. Listen, I can manipulate way better than I ever could after going to therapy. That's one of the positive reasons for therapy. But when you're dealing with someone like Carl, who has learned to mask a lot of these behaviors with coded, pop psychology, talk, or waiting, you know, he'll wait to have these feelings until the cameras are off and

that Lindsay look crazy, you know. But then we've gotten the lenses of Carl being the one who's really losing at this whole time. And everybody's blaming Lindsay for Carl actions, and I don't think that's cool either. But by the way, Lindsay also is crazy. I think the two of them are just like very wrapped up in being, you know, rat house and um, it's like annoying. It's like their life is that Marshall's commercial.

So obviously we're fired up. We got a whole big super sized episode to recap. So like, let's just like, we're gonna, I'm sure these thoughts will be peppered throughout the recap. So no need to front load anymore here. Let's dive into it. With this parking lot drama, Carl has gone, like, I want to say that he galloped off to the parking lot, but he didn't gallop, but he walks like a, like a slow gallop, you know, he's sort of like a, he's just like a, like a giraffe a little bit and he walks up. It's a big white pant battle between Kyle and Carl right now in the parking lot.

Has Carl ever had a walkoff not in white pants? Like Carl, get a new pair of fucking pants already. Those have got to be just shit stained on the unlike I'm sorry to be so disgusting, but those have got to be skidmarked up and down. I'm sure they're the same damn pants too, because you're Carl. Okay. So Carl is now walking off the somat and fittingly he's in the trash alley. Like his pants.

Yeah. A little too fittingly like his pants. He's in, he's stalking down the trash alley and Kyle is just stalking him, you know, slowly and not giving a fuck and drunk because he's Kyle. He's like, and Kyle's like, hey, you know what? Fuck you guys, couple fingers to the camera. Fuck you guys.

I'm not filming on this show anymore. I was both down. Yeah, I'm like sick of it. It's like ridiculous. I'm just sick of it and I'm like, okay, relax. Take a breath. It's like ridiculous, man. You know what?

You don't look right right now. I'm gonna say right now, you don't look right now. Now this said, I just was screaming about Carl literally two minutes ago. Right now I'm on Carl's side. Right now the beginning of the episode, I'm on Carl's side because fuck you, Robert, who are you? Who are you to come up and say shit like that to somebody? Robert won't wait too hard, he was on way too many drugs. I didn't like it.

It's this reaction that I'm not liking. I agree with Carl not liking what was said. I think Robert was an asshole. And I get standing up for your girlfriend. I think he went too far. But that said deal with it better running away. Stop running. You're on a television show, sir. running away, stop running. You're on a television show, sir. Well, yeah, I mean, yeah, I don't mind him taking a moment in the alley to, like, collect his thoughts because, you know, I understand he's trying to be like, don't get, like, too triggered, don't, like, go towards booze or something. He probably needs, like, a moment to reset. But I have more of an issue later on, but

he's up there, but he's still like, but now he's fully sort of like, he's pacing around back there. And meanwhile Dan Yell is talking to, well, actually I'm sorry, Lindsay, Lindsay is like talking to the girls. And she's like, um, I think I'm gonna go find my boyfriend right now. And because they clearly have that relationship where if neither of them see each other for 30 seconds, like one of them has to find the other one. So yeah, that's what happened on summer house Martha's vineyard too. It's like,

yes, they're all sitting out by the fire and Silas is like, where's my girlfriend? Where's my girlfriend at? I don't see my wife here. Where is she? Where's my wife? And then he starts like stalking through the house, looking in every single room for his wife. We haven't seen for five fucking minutes. Yeah, relax. By the way, since you brought that up, just wanna point out for people, our Patreon bonus episode this week,

we haven't recorded it yet, because Bravo has like a huge schedule right now. We are, we're gonna be rotating shows on and off our main feed, but we on the bonus bonus episode we are talking about below dexaling and Dan sequins but also Summer house Martha's vineyard which I think is excellent and I think it's kind of like I Think it's it's better showing up. It's better than summer house right now Although I really like this episode

I think the second half of the season has definitely picked up but like But watching summer house Martha's vineyard. It's like literally it's so good in just two episodes I think it's it's like the Summer House people next season really need to pick it up. They showed up They really showed up and it's better than this one there. I said it. Yeah, so we are gonna finish this one off though We are not quitteries, okay? Yeah, of course not like we've been listen We've been we've been waving the summer house flags at the beginning when no one else was okay So we are gonna finish it out. I want to crack fell with our name on it Okay, so then Daniel and Robert we cut to them and Danielle's like I mean did you ask like directly?

Why they wouldn't include me and their wedding? Because you're not fucking getting married to them, Danielle. You fuck your dough. Honestly, relax. I'm on your side and I'm telling you to relax. This is ridiculous already. And Robert's like, well, he said that he didn't think about it and didn't want to ruin the surprise. And she's, oh, oh, that's even worse. You didn't think about me? You didn't think about me? And he's like, yeah, well, you didn't think about her. And she goes, oh yeah, you didn't think about me. You didn't think about me.

You know what, I'm sorry, I'm so done. I'm so done. You know what, could you just be done? You sound like me at a buffet. I know. You can't just say I'm done 10 times. You're wasting water with all the plates you're having them clean.

Yeah, I really hate people who make loud proclamations of being done, but then they say at a million times because like, you're not done. You're being, it's just like, just say, I'm very frustrated and at a certain point I will be done, but this is not the point now. And I know that's not as fun as just saying I'm done, but it's like, it would save me some annoyance. So Lindsay now goes to the other group of girls and she's like, um, and he, you know where Carlie now is? I'm and he is 10 p.m. Do you know where your Carlie now is?

So she's doing that. What's he but I really do? And he's like, he's probably taking a moment to stay and stick his white jeans because how are those things still white? I mean, get real seriously. For those $5 to 10 years ago. So Carl is now he's like, he's doing this, this thing, he's doing

this thing in the parking lot where he's kind of like, hinging his butt, his like torso forward and backwards. And he's like, oh, Kyle, like the most important thing. I've forgotten my entire life is literally ruined because like, I didn't do something that I should have. Like, that's insane. That's insane. Like, I've never heard of anything like this in my entire life is literally ruined because like I didn't do something that I should have like that's insane That's insane like I've never heard of anything like this in my entire life That's like almost as crazy the idea of like

Well, learning your co-workers when you're going on vacation like who does that? Like I'm like shaking because I'm like so fucking mad Cuz like No, I don't want to No, I don't want to be a, I don't want to be a, ho, ho. Yeah, like rises such a big deal. Look, I'm happy. We moved in together. We bought a car.

Okay, we've got a key in together. Like the riding's on the wall. You know what, I told Daniel three weeks ago, I bought a ring. Look, what else do I have to do? The happiest moment in my life? I was like, that's it. This is not the happiest thing that's ever happened to you. The happiest thing.

That's what we go to. Yeah, it was having someone set up a picnic for you and then having Dave Quinn from people hide behind a tumbleweed bush on the beach to jump up and take secret pictures of you for this proposal that was a secret to my view, because all the press was already alerted and there. So shut up car. Yeah. I mean, it's just like I've been done so much. Like, you know,

you know, here's one thing you most people don't tell you. Like, you know, like every guest begins with K. But you don't realize is that every guest begins with K. Okay, and we did that. Okay, we have the run time. Every guest begins with K. I am. Also, everyone, just an apology for being so mad. I don't know why I'm in the best mood today and I think that's the most angry. I don't even, I'm just literally yelling about everything. It doesn't matter who's sad or hard on Kyle. I'm on Carl, like I mean, Carl and I was rolling my eyes

at Carl, but like I don't think I was like at that level of rage, but then like when you were a rageful, then I became rageful too. And I was like, well, the reason I got so mad, it wasn't at this scene. It's for later. It's for leaving the summer house. It's for what happened later that I got that mad. The reason I got that mad is because I realized we've fallen into the trap

where we're like concentrating on the two women fighting and not giving any blame to probably the biggest baby who's pulling all the strings right now, who has always pitted women against each other. And I feel like I'm in the show. giving any blame to probably the biggest baby who's pulling all the strings right now, who is Carl is pitted women against each other. And I feel like higher. Lindsay is, Lindsay is kind of, well, not kind, Lindsay's Lindsay. She is crazy. But I feel like Lindsay gets a lot of the blame. And everybody blames Lindsay for every little thing. But Carl is the one kind of pushing Lindsay into a lot of these fights with Danielle. Carl's the one going to Lindsay and, well, Daniel did do this and Danielle said that when he knows he's setting Lindsay up and the whole time, it's like, I feel stupid.

I'm not blaming Carl for doing that stuff. I'm only concentrating on the two chicks and that is unfair. So I'm raging kind of against my own machine. But like also, you know, I hope some people can see some of my perspective in this too, which is that like the wrong. That's what they see and they're correct. Okay, they see it. They see it. No, that like Carl and Lindsay, look, I love Lindsay.

Like I literally love, I love her on this show. I think she's hilarious. She's like my kind of reality star. She was hot and cold, but she's like crazy, you know? And I think that Lindsay and Carl are totally self-involved couple. Like everything is about them. And when it's not about them, it's like they are offended. And it's just like exhausting and annoying.

So that's to me is why I said before, like I don't, like when everyone's like, oh, I buy everyone I sell, so you, like, oh, pages of Mean Girl, they are mortal enemies of Lindsey. I'm like, I see them as people who are just like, like, exasperper like they've just been dealing with this bullshit and these bullshit stunts for so many years like You know like please go away, you know, so I don't see them as Mean Girls in this area I see them as people who are just like naturally just over this bullshit. I Think that it's it's what happens when you mix real housewives ages, you know They you know how you in real housewives used. You know, you know how real housewives used to always have like two younger ones

and then everyone else be older and it would always cause natural problems which is why they did it. And I think that that's kind of what Summer House does. Lindsay is like the old guard, you know, she's the old lady. She's like the act, she's literally like flavored yogurt for old people sitting on a beach.

And then you've got Paige, like the kids of the show who are like, oh, that old lady is like yelling again, you know? And I'm an older person, so I'm on team old lady. And that's it. And I look at the little kids as being like, oh my God. Like, you wouldn't even have the balls to fight me for a parking space. You don't even have a parking space. You all over here, you fucking lazy, like I get mad at just your

your county base in the parking lot. I am parking lot. That pages that little girl in the bikini and the I mean in the in the core fat in the sweater bikini who just like I purposely back into because she disrespected me in the parking lot. Okay. Yeah. Exactly. And someone in here is just late Tyson, but we haven't figured out here.

So Danielle, we're only about 30 seconds into this episode. It's time for commercial. It's time for a crap- If you're hiring, you know what it's like to deal with economic uncertainty. And now more than ever, it's really important to hire the right people faster and more efficiently because you gotta keep the overall cost down. And thankfully, there's a hiring partner

who's focused on you and your needs, and that is Zip Recruiter. From pricing to technology, everything that Zip Recruiter does is for you and what works best for you. And right now, you can try them free at ziprecruiter.com slash crap ins. Now here's how zippercrooter prioritizes your needs.

They've got very straightforward pricing, like no surprises, no twists and turns. Zippercrooter's smart technology identifies the best matches for your job. Hire the best with the help of a partner who's all about you, zippercrooter. Or out of five employers who post on Zipper Cruder, get a quality candidate within the first day. Just go to this exclusive web address to try Zipper Cruder for free, that zippercruder.com slash crappins.

Again, that zippercruder.com slash C-R-A-P-P-E-N-S. Zipper Cruder, the smartest way to hire. I'm going to say something scandalous running. Go on. Plants are meat. And not only are they meat, they're delicious, especially if they're from impossible foods. They taste like beef. Exactly. Impossible is making meat history this summer.

Yeah, they are. Summer of Impossible. I am so excited to be spending time, cooking my summer foods, all that good stuff, and guess what? We can use impossible sausages, impossible brats. I mean, it's gonna be a great summer for impossible foods. Impossible beef is made from plants and 19 grams of protein per serving, and it's better for the planet. And it's meat! Plant meat!

Correct! So if you're looking for something to grab for your grill, grab some impossible beef. Summer of impossible. Start making meat history today, just head over to the meat aisle at your local grocery store, grab some impossible beef or patties and get grilling. So Danielle is like, did she just complain still and crawled for you? If Robert didn't say a word to me before he proposed to Daniel, like, I wouldn't even give a fuck.

I'm like, that's, well, that's partially because I think you're kind of self-absorbed. But either way, actually, his point does remain. Right, but no one would have given a fuck. Because that's something I can't do. Like, you know, who else would give, wouldn't give a fuck? Everybody, like, would Dave Quinn

from people be hiding with the camera in a tumbleweed to watch Daniel get proposed to by a chef she never sees. No. I feel like, um, Joanne Pensacoli from the Penny saver might. He's like, got a scoop. So he's going off and he's like, yeah, I'd be like, dude, that's fucking amazing. Like, we'll see if we can come to your wedding possibly.

I mean, like, there's bigger things in the world to be upset about. Like, come on. They need to grow the fuck up. You're the one crying in an alley because you heard somebody's feelings. Yeah. So I was like, uh, well, uh, I hate to break it to you, but like everyone else around me for like the past six or seven years is like question every single move I've made, like Chicago, be doing a startup, Chicago be moving on the mandat, Chicago will be working with Carl,

should Kyle be firing Carl, should Kyle be drinking that, that lover boy while he thinks about doing all these things, should Kyle go into rehab, all these things that they question. That's just what people do, which was his way of saying like, dude, like toughen up.

Okay, this is like the first group that you've gotten, like relax, I'd be able to screw knee every single episode on this show. But also Kyle's hilarious because Kyle was the one who just came on a few weeks ago and told everybody Carl was so fucked up on Coke that he was fucking up his job and he's not even showing up. Like Kyle came in totally through Carl

under the bus, which talk about alcoholism and it was, you know, trying to be sober and all of that. That's a lot of triggering shit that Carl did literally for no reason at the beginning of the season. So it's really funny listening to him now. I don't think it was for no reason. I don't think it was just throwing your best friend out of the bus on national television when Carl hadn't done anything to him. I think it was a pretty no reason to do it. No, I think it was, I think it was, I think it was Takas' hell

and I never would have done that, but I think that like he basically was like frustrated because Carl was being like a, like a non-present worker and he was having, and Carl was not like, he was like, hey Carl, what is going on? And Carl, remember Carl didn't even write that email back. Carl keeps on presenting it like, oh I'm looking on this look, keep me not like,

keep me not entirely like operational live. And Carl's like just sending him emails presenting it like, oh, I'm looking on this look, keep me not entirely operational live. And Carl's just sending him emails to be like, hey, what can I do to fix the situation? And Carl doesn't even write back. Let's see, oh yeah, I've been meaning to work on our email for like, oh, the past like two months, I just don't know how to start it. Now here's where we get into arguments

about summer house consistently this year. Okay, and let me try and explain my wing because it's a consistent thing here This is another example of it this Kyle and Carl argument It's not that what the person that's being complained about is doing is correct Carl was wrong in that situation I think Carl's a terrible employee where I saw the betrayal is that Kyle is going to a group of people that are not team Carl And he's presenting it like Carl is still such a drug addict and a fucking loser.

It's when he, that's like the other side of the house. You know, Lindsay and Carl are naturally against the other side of the house right now because of Lindsay. So I think that Kyle going against who's supposed to be his best friend to go for a man to the side of the house is a betrayal. I think it's shitty to do as a best friend and it's the same in the example of Danielle. It's not that Danielle's wrong.

Yes, Lindsay probably has blown her off and done all of that stuff. I would be on Danielle's side, but how Danielle is acting is she's going to people that she knows are Lindsay's enemies. Like they just are, it's betraying. If she went to Kyle, just Kyle and talked about it at least He's like a best friend, but she's not she's going to the girls that she knows are anti-lensy and so I see that as a similarity in both

Fives they're both doing the ultimate betrayal by shit talking their best friend to people they know that don't like them and to me That is reality poison that is where I break up with people. I don't think those people don't like Carl. I don't think, again, I don't like that. I think that that rat house. Yeah, I don't think that, I thought it was totally terrible that Carl did that. Like it was so inappropriate, especially as like a boss, it's like actually like, it's so bad.

But I don't know, I guess, I just, I don't have the same view of the house. I don't see it as a black and white, like this side versus that side. I think it's kind of like a lot of great areas with this people. I think they're like, you know, there's there are there's definitely it's I don't know. I don't see it as like as black and white as some other. I don't see it as like a Melissa versus Theresa.

Like to me, that's a very black and white like enemy enemy thing. But I think in the summer house, there's breeder. There's a lot of white page. And it's page and. There's breeder. Black and white. Page and I'm saying it's not right. First is Lindsay. Period. Like everything else. And then you'll just kind of go, she's a floater.

Now she's a floater. She used to be a Lindsay and Carl and Kyle. And then a Amanda, Kyle would have to float between because of Amanda. But I think Amanda, Page and Sierra are definitely anti-Lindsay. I think that's pretty obvious, you know? And I'm not saying it's not rightly so. I think they're just over her. I don't think that it's like, you know what it is? I think that talking about like, they're her mortal enemies, like they hate her, yada yada. I think

they're just like exhausted by her. This person who takes up all this energy and requires all this attention. And like treats people shitty, they're just like, you know, but I don't see it as malicious as like a Theresa and Melissa situation. That's like deeply toxic. Well, I don't need to label it that deeply, but I think they hate her and she hates them. Like I'm just like that kind of a person.

I'm more of a black and white person, and that's it. Okay, so let's move on just because you guess, guess when the next time we have this conversation is in five more minutes. So, and here's another black and white. Here's another black and white issue. I love you, and I will never do that. I will never go to one of your mortal enemies and talk shit about you. I will do it.

I will do it only to people I know are mutual friends that can possibly help me through this. There we go. Exactly. Well, you don't have to worry about too much because I don't have mortal enemies. Just don't have to probably do. If you're my mortal enemy, you'd be dead.

Okay, so I doubt you have mortal enemies, by the way. That's a lie. So Carl is like, oh, I'm just ruined everything. I'm ruined my own thing. Guys, like I didn't do what they wanted me to. Like that sucks and, oh, okay, I'm just ruined everything. I ruined my own thing because like I didn't do what they wanted me to. Like that sucks and I don't know how I'm gonna recover from this.

I upset them. Okay, so now I soften towards Carl because now he's like, I upset them. I made Danielle feel horrible. And now I've ruined six years of friendship because of one decision. So now we're seeing that Carl is not upset that his engagement is ruined for him and Lindsay. He's actually upset that he's lost Danielle as a friend.

So why doesn't he like pull her over and say can we talk and clear this up? Actually, know what? I know the answer to that. I know the answer to that because it's what happens in the next like 30 seconds. There's a reason why he doesn't pull her over and say let's talk. So, because don't play yourself in that box, well, don't leave yourself in that box. So I put, well, actually cares about Danielle, but Danielle only really cares about Lindsey's approval. It's like a fucked up triangle. Like she'll say she cares about Carl, but she doesn't really. She cares about Lindsey, who is kind of connected to Carl, but Lindsey only cares about Carl.

But then Carl cares about Danielle when Lindsey doesn't care about Danielle. Yeah. He only cares about Carl, but then Carl cares about Danielle when Lindsey doesn't care about Danielle. Yeah, like Danielle definitely likes the same movies that Lindsey likes only because Lindsey likes them. So, like that's pretty clear. So, Carl's like, and Carl's like, you're gonna be okay man. And then, Outwalk's Lindsey. This is why Carl doesn't pull Daniellea's hide to clear it up because Lindsay appears and she's like, oh, what the fuck does that mean?

What happened? What the hell happened? And he's like, ah, you know what? I'm gonna lay you guys be. I think he's just neither a minute. I think he's just, I know when that. And then Kyle just like bends over and like dumps the top half of his body into a dumpster

and just starts drinking half empty fucking beers from the dumpster What Carl and Lindsay talk and Carl's like oh, I just need a moment. All right, look as I was just told I ruined all sorts of things Okay, now see see what Carl just did trigger Lindsay He didn't just say listen. I was upset. I had a conversation that I heard Danielle's feelings. And now I feel bad. Yeah. I feel bad. I want to, I was just told I just ruined all sorts of things. Purposely triggering Lindsey to use her as a weapon against his. That's a, it's a very like the phrasing of that.

It's, it's, it's, I don't know, I don't know the psychological term to say the phrasing of it, but he definitely, he puts himself in the narrative as, you know, like, oh poor me. And so Lindsay and Lindsay's whole thing has been that she's sort of been Carl's caretaker, like that sort of, seems like that's the nature of their codependency. And so Lindsay's like, on your own proposal,

oh, no, we're leaving. We're leaving, let's go. She just immediately is like, I know what this is all about. We're not even gonna have conversations. This will not even be on the show. We're gonna leave right now. She goes, oh, let's go to Southampton social. We're friends are.

Yeah. Honestly, a hilarious thing to say. I'm gonna go to Southampton social, we're my friends are. Yeah, you've got your party that's being sought, but then you've got your after party where your real friends are, which is funny. And she's like, and we don't need to be here. We can leave tomorrow.

And Carl comes out of the dumpster. He's like, oh, it's like, don't even yell at me right now. I wasn't even just part of this, but I was like, oh, it wasn't yelling. I mean, what do you mean where your friends are? I mean, it's just me, I'm the only way trying to be a good friend. Now I'm not a friend. And she's like, Kaya, oh wow.

She's like, I told you she didn't do this. And I told you you were like, not gonna feel bad about it. I like she says, like, I'm telling you how you're gonna feel in response. Like, I told you, you're not gonna feel bad about it. Remember? And then she said, she said, I told you she was gonna do this. And I told you not to feel bad about it, because she knew that Danielle was waiting for the cameras to make herself a huge victim, and have a big confrontation to try and get herself some screen time. What she did, she knew this was going to happen, and Carl totally fell for it. Yeah, well, I'm a human being,. I don't like hurting someone's feelings. It makes me sad.

Like, you know what? Like Archaos Arendo? Like, that's someone else's not Kiaos Arendo. Like, that makes me sad every time we drive it. I apologize every time we pass the VW bug. Okay. That's someone who may have wanted Archaos Arendo, and then we bought it. Okay, there's a car short to drive it now, and I just, I feel bad. It's like every time I see a Kia before the logo redesign, I'm like, oh, you poor thing. Y'all, it's like, what I see those Kia's before the logo redesign,

I think that how easy they were to steal, and I'm just like, I just feel bad for them, you know, I'm just like that as a person. So then Kyle goes into Tatlotaal, because he's such a good friend, and he's just so supportive to Kyle for them, you know, I'm just like that as a person. So then Kyle goes into Taddle Tail because he's such a good friend and he's just so supportive to Kyle and to Carl and Lindsay. So he goes in and he's like, I just found Carl, if you're talking to Robert and he's like in a vulnerable state because he felt his whole proposal and engagement is ruined now and Danielle gives

like a cynical laugh. She's like, I'm an app designer like that kind of laugh. And then cows like so they just left. And Paige cannot contain her smile. Paige is fucking loving this because Paige is not really even having to. Paige is not having to really do it. It is ridiculous. That's what she's also a big fueler of the fire, I think. And I love the page. Paige is totally the little girl in the meme where the city is burning down behind her and she's smirking at the camera. She is totally that little girl.

But she's smirking at the camera because she's like, I totally picked the right outfit for the spires of the city burning down. That's why she's smirking. She's like, you know what? I thought about wearing dungarees today and I said, no, wear something that'll be special for flames. No, I think that's pages smiling.

Because it has- I think I've been planted to seed and she's watched it grow into beautiful trades. She didn't even have to water it today. Like, it's like growing succulent, you know? Where it's like, she planted this but she didn't even have to water it that much. She actually got to sit back

and slowly watch the succulent grow while she's in cute sweater bikinis. Yeah, I mean, I would smile if I had an easy growing plant too. I mean, look, I went upstairs to water gale today and the oregano was like six feet tall and I smiled. I was like my planter grow. But you know, I really, in honesty, I think I don't think it was just mine. She sees misery and eventually and eventually departure from the show so congratulations page Ben you did it No page Ben team page Ben you know because the reason why You're you're able to be smiling you make you know what I think the reason why she's smiling is not because like Ha I drove her off the show. I think she's smiling because she's like

This is so ridiculous. I cannot wait to go back home and sit on the sofa and just gossip about it like, oh my God, this is ridiculous. I just rise into smoke. When she sit on the sofa, she's gonna lay in the goddamn bed. That's what she's gonna do.

You know on Reddit, they call them the bed-sour sisters, which I think is hilarious. Well, by the way, I actually take offense to that too. You know why? People act like they don't do that. Okay. Everyone does that. Larry's. Well, by the way, you know, I actually take offense to that too. You know why? People act like they don't do that. Okay. Everyone does that.

Everyone's, when they were like with your friends, you sit on the bed and you like, you should like talk shit about things. You're like, oh my god, you see what happened earlier today? That's ridiculous. Like, come on. And I've always said that Paige makes me furious on the show, but she is very funny and I do approve of her first spending all of her time in bed. So, you know, like there are certain things I will always like.

But I guess we want more of Marriotti stars. I can understand people want if you're on TV to be doing more than sitting in bed, but like people can't act like, like, I can't believe there would be sitting in bed hanging out. Yeah, there's cameras. There's cameras. So, Gabby's like, they laughed and cause like, yeah, right there, Lindsey'm like, that's what friends do. Just cameras. No. Gabby's like, they left and cars like, yeah, right there, Lindsey was like in a uff and puff

and Lindsey was like, I'm leaving to social club where we have actual friends. And then Amanda starts cracking up. And you know, they were right. You guys fucking suck page and Amanda laughing at each other. Like this is amazing that they just left their own engagement party pissed off.

You know, fucking guy engagement party. It was just an evening out, by the way. This is during that they just left their own engagement party pissed off. You know, fuck you guys engagement party. It was just an evening out, by the way. This is during party half and three. No, engagement party half and a week ago. No, this is the engagement party. They're still in their all white and all that shit. I think they just don't know. Lindsay is still in her Charlie Brown's shape.

You know, she wore the Charlie Brown patterned dress and the engagement. No, because Amanda wasn't, Amanda wasn't, no, Lindsay just has, she has a deep catalog of that style. But Amanda wasn't at, remember Amanda wasn't in the Hamptons when the engagement happened and they had to face timer in. Oh, okay, I'm sorry everybody, my bad. So anyway. But by the way, we know,

but just like that fans and you guys are still saying they're struggling with each other. But, but by the way, we know, but just like that and you guys are still saying they're struggling at each other. But it's within the umbrella, it's within the sphere of the engagement party. So for Carl and Z, like that, like it literally was their engagement until probably at least Yum Kapoor, like every event that happened until Yum Kapoor was like their engagement. Lindsey is that friend though. We all know it because not first is the pre-engagement.

I'm like, is he gonna hang in there? Are we gonna get engaged? Well, there was a move in section. Then there was a wee bit of car together section. Then there was the pre-engagement. Then there was the engagement. Now it's the lead up to the wedding and the bride's mate who's gonna be a bride's mate.

Then it's all of the bride's mate's stuff. Then it's the wedding. Then immediately after it's winner, we're gonna have fucking children, you know? It seems like we have this extra children. Next kid, and then we got the house. Like everything is like an event, and if you don't participate in it in the way

that they want you to participate in, you're not supporting them as a couple. That's what it is, and that's congratulations everyone in their lives, because that's what you have to deal with for the next 20 years. Right, and my point is, Amanda and Paige are not their real friends

because they don't give a shit. You know, so when she says, I'm going to go somewhere we have real friends. This is what she's talking about with you fucking smirking assholes, loving this loving that all of this went down. Yeah, I don't, you know what? I actually don't disagree with that. I don't disagree with that. But it is rude to say that in front of Kyle because I think Kyle actually is their real

friend despite everything. It's something he just came to total tattle, get everybody even more pissed off at them by tattle-telling and saying exactly every little thing. I don't know what laughed at the columns. Yeah, they left upset because he got an argument with Robert. Yeah, but they just, they just, they just, they just, so he's supposed to still like, like, sort of like obscure their intentions. Yeah, as you're supposed to still be a friend. You're still supposed to not go

through your best friends under the bus with everybody else because it's the popular move. Let's, you know, we're never gonna be great. We're gonna be here in nine hours because we're just gonna keep repeating ourselves. I know. It's fun, isn't it? Okay, so now for something different, I just have to say, the younger people now are trying and I hate to put Craig in the category because he literally pivot Ronnie, you're about to pivot. I sense you're pivoting now about something. Yeah, it's a different scene. So it's Craig, I hate to include Craig and the young people because he literally looks like Jessica Tandy right now. But this newer kind of cast is trying to prove that they can do this without Lindsay and Carl and the old guard

Basically, you can't okay because every scene that they cut to For a Sierra and Craig like oh, we're gonna do a shot. Oh my god. Let's do a shot. Oh my god We're gonna do pickle that yeah, we're gonna do pickle backs It's been literally cutting back for 10 minutes to this why are they cutting back to it? It's the most boring shit I've ever seen, and you guys are try hard, and it doesn't look like you're having fun. It looks like Sierra is doing shots

with literally half the cast of Cuckoom, right before they went. All right, before they went back. I was gonna stand in, and then their Uber driver, Morgan Freeman, I almost had Morgan Fairchild. But you know what? I think it's interesting because talking about Martha's Vineyard Summer House is that they spend a lot of the episode doing similar things but just like way more entertaining because I think they are more substantive people than some of the

cast members on here. So we're inherently interested versus watching Sierra and Craig taking pickle back shots. I don't know why, we're like Sam saying things. It's hard to describe. A entertain that's a different type of entertainment. Yes, Sierra and Craig are just born together. So Sierra's like, yeah, I mean, their engagement just feels so rushed.

I mean, when would you engage to it? And Craig's like, when we get our own season finale, I mean, like, when would you in page to it? And Craig's like, oh, when we get our own season finale, I mean, that's what Dave said. And I was like, of which show we're on three. And Sierra's like, okay, well, what's the perfect scenario for you? And he's like, well, earlier than when we talked about, you know, and I thought we were like next, but then page started crying

because she's going to miss her mom. I was like, what the fuck? Who would cry over their mom when you're on a TV show? Answer me that. Like, what, like you're just gonna cry because of your mom. Page is crazy, absolutely crazy. Well, to be fair, circle back to this way. We're missing her mom and Craig is crying over

missing his mom's birthday because he's a fucking drunk and a loser. Okay. Uh, it's time for commercial. It's- Hi, I'm Michael Patrick King, host of the official Max Companion Podcast, and just like that, the writer's room. Each episode members of the writer's room and I unpacked moments from season 2, sharing juicy details you can only hear from us.

Stream and just like that season 2, starting June 22nd on Max, and listen to and just like that, the right is room on Max or wherever you get your podcasts. Time for a crap and it's commercial. So yeah, so anyway, Craig's talking about. Sierra's basically like, you listen, you have to stop fantasizing about proposing because it's going to be a, it's like a reality. I'm like, I don't think Craig is fantasizing. I think that's the issue is that it is a reality. And Peter's like, can you put that back into your fantasy things? So Craig's like, well, the other thing is Sierra, like you're like a romantic at heart. Like you believe in true love. And that's I guess why

you were dating Austin because I guess you thought maybe you could turn him into something dateable, but that's why we get along so well, because we both are, we're both like Romantics Sierra. And you moved to the city alone, like wow, but guess what? Having to watch some watch your shows with, having someone to watch your TV shows with tonight,

that's important. She's like, you're gonna make me cry right now. He's like, you just, it's like you don't need anyone, but like you, it would be nice to have someone eat popcorn with. And she goes, oh my god, literally sobbing. You guys are the least romantic, a, you're the least romantic people I've ever heard. Like, well, yeah, you're settling, but it's better than watching adventure time alone. But b, these two actually have chemistry. Sorry to say it. Scandival.

I think that paid watch, watch your friends and your man's together because I do not have a good chemistry. They have very good chemistry. These two, I think they've got good chemistry just saying, wow, not encouraging anything, not accusing anyone of anything. I'm just saying there's energy. I see a lot of hot takes on see it. A lot of hot takes on this recap. A lot of hot takes.

By the way, I love when Craig said, you know what? Like there's no systematic way to date and meet people. Systematic, like it's entrenched in our society of how we, I don't know. It seemed funnier to me last night, and that was I verbalized with. Yeah, well, it was correct. No, it was funny too. Yeah, night and that was I verbalized with all this. Correct.

No, it was funny too. Pop that. There's no systematic lady meat, someone. She's going to have to what it happens on a TV show. You just have to wait until you're on a TV show where there's lots of hot people and then you just become one of the best of the saddest options. And then everyone goes home and parties. It's like party party party,

Kyle's dancing with Greg on the island. And Chris is that guy that no one hangs out with at the restaurant like when you're working. And he's always the one he's like, guys, this house is a family, a dysfunctional house, but a family. No, it's not. It's a group of fucking bitter ass apple beeswaters

sitting around a staff meal Waiting to get a fair share of their five dollars that they made that day. Stop calling this a family. Sorry No one likes you. Let me tell you something. Let me tell you something. I already told you this But I'm telling I'm telling the masses. So earlier in the season there was the promise of a super hot guy Circling this cast Jerez Who's like the male model that Gabby was like, oh my god, he's so hot, he's so much,

oh wait, he's a cascorpio, so I naturally followed Jerez on Instagram because he's super hot, right? I'm sure a fucking pervert, you follow so many thought Instagram. Why can't I? Why not? That's what Instagram is there for. I also follow lots of follow things.

It's easier to see what housewives are trying to sell you. I follow them too. I follow a mixture, listen, I follow my board game, content creators, I follow my food, content creators, I follow thoughts, you know, it's like, it's a little bit of everything, it's like a well curated, a smorgasbord of visual variety.

So I keep my boner, my boner inducing material in a different place. I don't like it mixed with like my housewise stuff. I don't, well, I don't want to like get a boner and then like scroll onto a Ramona post. We're like, you know, what are you thought? I love the tell show, Brigadine. So good. Well, I'm going to be back on real housewives, New York legacy with Countess Lannanian vinceps.

That was her story yesterday. She couldn't say Countess's name, Countess Lannan's name. Anyway, the point is this, Jerez turns out, I think that, you know, like very easy on the eyes, beautiful human being, not that bright, which is fine. I'm surprised. which is fine.

Which is fine. But I really hit the, there was a, he had a story up over the weekend where he was in a store with Chris from this show. And Dress is like, yo, I gotta tell you guys, when you're having an egg, you gotta get pasteurized eggs. You need to make sure they're pasteurized. And I was like, oh God, it's pasteurized. But like whatever, it's a male model, it's fine.

And then it cuts to Chris. He swings around to Chris. And Chris holds up some eggs. And he goes, and he points to it, says pasteurized. He goes, pasteurized. You need to have your pasteurized eggs. And I was like, you know what? This is what I deserve.

I deserve it. I followed it. I just, I just, I deserve it. I deserve it. My life is emptier for it. I am a dumber for having watched this story. These two idiots going around a store telling people to get Paster raised eggs.

I can't. All right. So then we go to Maya page and Maya in their natural habitat, the bed. Maya's like, I thought of a brilliant idea. We should like push this bed over there to that bed so that we can like face each other or get rid of this table in the middle and then we can make it warm. Like, you're gonna make a bigger fucking bed. It's like the citizens of

Sealy, okay? The whole town is gonna come together to just make an even bigger bed. What are you gonna have a town all on this one? Don't act like you did not fully support this. I thought this was a wonderful thing. I was like, first of all, it's the first thing Maya has done in a season and a half. So I applaud her. Second of all, I was very happy. Not only did I enjoy watching this bed come together, but I applaud her. Second of all, I was very happy. Not only did I enjoy watching this bed come together, but I loved how Paige was so resistant to move that page. You have to get off the bed. She's like, ah, ah, okay, I'm standing with one, well, one fits off the bed. Is that good enough? Like, Paige, you have to get off the bed. They put

it together. I love that this is the page finally gets off the bed and they put it together. They're playing hero music from You know sweet chair. They were all star or whatever Yeah, all of the more so right this whole episode is just everybody being on multiple drugs and just completely wasted, you know and I'm a bad yeah mega bass like And I was like, y'all, y'all, y'all. But they were playing, when they were playing that, all of a sudden, I was like,

I thought they were doing it for Paige getting out of bed, not because they pushed me back, because they're like, Paige you have to get out of bed, like, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. I was like, wow, they are really, they're a roasting page right now. So meanwhile, Chris is doing that rough housing things

that hot guys do, that hot, the rough housing thing that hot guys do, the rough housing thing that hot guys do, where they're like rough housing, but then they just start taking off their clothes slowly, you know, like why is Suddenly, he's in his underwear. It's like he's still rough housing with Robert, but now he's in his underwear and so Then Craig comes into page in my as room in his underwear and my I was like, why are you naked? And also why is there an elephant on his deck? It's totally an elephant on Christ deck, yeah. Yeah, and there was. There's like a little elephant, trunk, little elephant face,

page is like, don't walk in with an elephant on your deck and ask me when I'm wearing. By the way, during all this, it keeps cutting to Carlisans' room, which is just like untouched, like no one's in there. It's just highlighting that they're not there. Yes. So it's just like cavorting and then it's the morning. Robert Kisses Danielle Gabbain just gets a hell out of there.

And there's like people waking up and all that stuff they're milling about and everything and Carlisle's room. It's still empty. Then Craig wakes up and like he sits up and badmios like and Paige says, um, did you just spit on the floor and he goes in my mouth and she's like, wow, and then he cuddles her and like it's his face right in here. But he also picks something off the pillow which makes me think he did spit something. I think he spit on the floor. He's a Floor, he's a Floor Spitter. He has shown nothing but disrespect for like people's spaces and objects like for years now. I mean, hello, he maimed his finger poking a butter knife into a wall.

This is someone who will spit on your floor. Who spit on the floor and then threw a hundred at it. My parents don't clean company. I don't do that anymore. So then Craig is wearing Sarah's bonnet playing with his balls and bed. It's got like his his hands fully down his pants. This is wow, what an image. I still nothing can get me to believe that Paige loves this person. I really believe it. Paige is only here for the social. And you know what, I'm here for that for her. I love that for her. But

I just refuse to believe that she actually loves this meanderthal. Smash that like button. So guess what, we managed to cut to Carl Lindsay's room like five times within 30 seconds. It's like, we get it. They're not home. They're not home. They do not suddenly materialize inside their room. So I'm finally Sam notices and she goes down to the kitchen. She's like, um, their bags aren't even in their room.

What does that mean? Do you think they don't want to go on the boat? I agree. They're going to come on the boat. Guys, Cory's so hot. I thought Cory lost that, you guys. Fuck them. Yeah, do you think they're out fucking somewhere

at the way that Cory and I were fucking last week in Montag? I really like this guy. I really like the guy. I like the kid. Oh, you know what I can't stand? I hate when people go, I can't help it. I really like the kid.

I like the guy. So just adding that in there, as long as we're having an episode of Hot Takes Guys, now you know where I stand on that phrase. So Sam is like, yeah, I'm thinking about the boat and I was like, I don't know, I've been in situations that have been hard and challenging, and I just, I never, like, just up and left. I just would walk to some random person's house and just sit on the, they're rocking horse and they're yard, but that's it.

That's as far as that. Go. I totally think like that's it. That's as far as that. Yo. Um, I totally think he should check it. But I'm like, what's going on with that? And he's like, you know what? I'm really tired of being in the fucking ring bear. In situation. I like this.

Sick ring bear. That's ridiculous. Do you mean that ring bear? Talk ring bear. Talk ring bear. Like Corey. Corey's in achrane bearer. Fuck yeah, love it.

Fuck yeah. He spit through his Cochrane into my mouth, loved it, gonna marry him. He shrunk himself down into a tiny motorcycle and let the Cochrane on fire and drove right through it. So hot. So, man, it's like,

Kyle, come on, call him, it's fun. Sometimes like, yeah, I wanted to know what they slept. So he calls and it's like, come on, come on, call him, it's fun. Sometimes like, yeah, I want to know where they sat, so he calls. And, and I was like, oh, oh, hey man, it's me. You're the lady, yeah. We were leaving for the boat, so just seeing if you guys are going to join us, oh, no, it's not going to be able to make the boat back. Oh, sorry. Yeah.

Yeah, sorry. We're going to need to float with some people who are a little more smart. Yeah. We're gonna be on the front of like a pontoon. Yeah. So we're are gonna be on the USS US. So like us. Okay. It's all about us.

One thing to be noticed. Yeah. Actually, like we really noticed, like we went to we went to SAG Harbor and we noticed, first of all, we did not get our equity card when we went to sad harbor and we noticed First of all, we did not get our equity carbon went there which was a little misleading and second of all I mean, there's a lot of boats there were really supportive of us because they all are with us Really did they say sad carber wow finally?

Report that Lindsey belongs in Yeah, well, I don't know where that voice came from, but it really like reassures me that we're doing the right. I'm still in my bed. I'm just talking through the ring cam in the kitchen. So he's on great by the way, although I met him. Yes. So he don't sound great. He's on reverse. Great. Yeah. All right. Camp. Wait. So make you quit the show. Okay. Enjoy. Yeah. Well, well, yeah. Well, maybe we can catch up over some waffles on a Wednesday or pancakes. I should say Yes Yeah, well, anyway, um, yeah, we're so out work like one of Lindsay's friends house like real friend You know, and like we stayed here last night

So I guess we kind of had like a better time than you guys did so I just think it's best to take ourselves out of like the toxicity It's actually you should suggest that Lindsay Take some of that toxicity and use it on her face because it regrows the skin. Consider it chemical, peel advice. Okay, thanks. She's old. Wow, that's great advice. Hey, Lindsay, Paige said that we're going to sell your beans or cost that. I think Danielle's negativity is just like a just you match right now and it's like the only source of negativity in our lives right now. I'm like you, you, Lindsay of all people claiming there's only one source of negativity. You're a pretty big source of the negativity, Lindsay, okay. I love you. Then on your side, the season,

what are you fucking kidding me? Get the fuck over and get over here. The Marshalls didn't hire you because you guys are just so charismatic on your own. Get back to fucking work or go home forever. That's what I'm talking about. You're not on a show called Down the Street from Summer House. You're on a show called Summer House. Yeah, so you're not like. And you just spin off.

We all saw that Marshall's commercial. You too could barely make it through that. That was one of the most awkward pieces of shit I've ever sat through in a commercial. Get your ass back to work, you're doing this to yourselves. Or if you're gonna do this, be funnier about doing it.

Like, let's go back to season one, like. I was in a house. Oh, where the man? When a bit. Whatever it was. Remember, she went and slept in a bit, and went on to, she got on to fight with Everett and then she went to a different house

and spent the night at a different house because that's like her play. But yeah. Right. So anyway, Carl's like, yeah, I think like for me personally, I think it's like best like we're not in the house or on a boat or in a house boat, that would actually be like the worst of both worlds. And like last night, like we're gone. And you know what?

Nobody said a word to us. It doesn't seem like anyone even really cared. I mean, for me, like I'm just taking a break. I'm like, wait a second. No, no, no, you can't do that too. You can't say these aren't my real friends. You can't like storm off and not even say goodbye or anything. And then be like, no one else about us.

Like, no, no, no, it's like one or the other. Well, he also doesn't know that Kyle went back into the party and told literally everyone there that Carl said none of them were his real friends Sorry, he doesn't know that yet, but he knows All that he knows is that and people saw him leave upset and nobody cared to call him Which is true, but I think that also goes I think that also speaks to how much energy you've put into these relationships in the house What do you know about Gabby? Yes, what do you know about Sam? How much time he spent with Corey? All you did was almost paddle Chris.

While Kyle was wasted one time. Like, it was pretty funny. He said your baby mouth. This is where they both lose me. I've been on their side this whole time with this whole situation. I've, you know, I fought to the death for these two. But this is where you lose me.

Just walking off like this is terrible, terrible, and you being such a big fucking baby grow up, dude. See, isn't it great that we both have those moments because I had that moment last week with Danielle? I was like, oh, see, I was defending you all season, and you're gonna act like a fool, and now you're having this season with them. That's why I had this moment,

like why are we fighting with each other of these idiots that are just gonna betray our stances? Yep, but I agree, I was like, this is just sort of underlines how self-involved they are, right? So by the way, Amanda's laughing at this loving this. You know? No, LaVica is ridiculous. Like she may be, I don't think she's loving it.

I think she's like these two are the most ridiculous people. She is loving it and she's loving that these two are putting each other really where they've wanted down this whole time Which is off the show, you know, so I don't see it up to say a political plan I know you don't but I do and that's it, you know, Amanda's laughing. She's petting a little cat and she's twirling her fingers together like this That's how it is Well Amanda's like well, I feel bad that they feel this way and I understand it is like, well, I feel bad that they feel this way. And I understand it. I like, they just got engaged and they want to be around people that are happy for them.

And like that sucks. But like, no one checks in on them because like, if you leave the house, and like, why would we? Right. Like, there's not Carl, Carl Lindsey, you don't say that to Kyle. Really anyone, I think like, oh, he's gonna keep what I just said secret. Like of course, Kyle's gonna be like, yeah, they said they're gonna go hang out with their true friends. Like, why would they ever expect anyone to reach out to them after that?

Well, I love that Amanda's like, listen, this is me being really nice. I'm so happy for them. And they're home, and I'm home. I was like, just get to the butt, Amanda. Stop with fake shit, you know? And I like that she said, but no one checked in on them. I mean, give me a break. Says the queen of walking off crying to get people to follow her and listen to her cry for an hour on a bed, Amanda. Amanda's made rules that as long as you do it in the house, it counts. Which I would give to her because

this is a show called Summer House and I hate that they walked off. You know what's really triggering me? Is that Amanda's saying all this shit and as much as Amanda makes me crazy and I'm never on her side with any of this, she's right about it. And they just walked off the show and they fucked themselves. And it's like when Vanderpump left Beverly Hills and it pissed me I was so triggered by it because I was like, we need you to stand up for yourself.

This whole thing, I need you to come in here and tell everybody off and win. I don't need you to fucking run away. Like you can't do that. When you have a whole stadium of people, half of them are cheering for you. You can't just walk off the field. Yeah, you can't. But also when Amanda does squirrel her, it goes off crying into her room, she doesn't then expect the people that she called her not friends to then come and console her,

you know. And that is a subtle but important difference. I mean, Amanda is the queen of doing exactly what you just said, like the queen of it. That was the source of one of the fights that had Danielle saying to, I mean Danielle saying to Lindsay, like, wasn't your man stand up, that stupid game night thing, you know, by the way, I just want, this is a total tangent. You know what, I'm going to save it. I'm going to save it for next week's. No, no. It's about the Roni trailer, and since you haven't seen it yet, I don't think it's fair for me to bring up. Oh, yeah, we'll talk about that later. Yeah, we're going to do that next week's. No, no. It's about the Roni trailer, and since you haven't seen it yet,

I don't think it's fair for me to bring up. Oh, yeah, we'll talk about that later. Yeah, we're gonna do that next week. I'm just like now, like my brain is overloaded. So anyway, the point is that Kyle feels like it's a fuck you to them, because they all rallied and celebrated, which is also true, they all went to the engagement party, they all went to the housewarming party, they all went to like this, that, and is also true. They all went to the engagement party. They all went to the housewarming party.

They all went to like this, that, and the other thing. And then for them, then they're like, yeah, well, we're gonna go off for our real friends. Like, they've had a whole season kind of geared around them. So to walk off his fucking annoying eye-grey on that. So Kyle is saying, you know, I was hoping they were gonna try and reconcile with Danielle, but now this feels like an effuute everybody else who rallied and celebrated.

You know, you guys didn't tell Danielle to shut the fuck up either, but it's not really their place. I'm arguing with myself at this point. So, but I did write my notice. It's a fuck you from them. You're right, but also a fuck you. You're a terrible friend who used his addiction against him like two weeks ago, Carl. So I'm not really understanding for his whole life.

But that's why it's, right, it is a fuck you. It is like literally a fuck you. It's literally a fuck you. And it's a deserved fuck you, that's what I'm saying. But, right, but that's why it's also crazy that they're like, and then no one called us. Like we said, we gave you a big fuck you, and they're like, no one even called

to see how we were feeling at the weekend. So I'd fuck you. And they're like, no one even called to see how we were feeling at the weekend said, fuck you to y'all. Yeah. So Sam and Sam is talking to Dan, y'all they're doing under eye stuff. And Sam's like, oh, I have news for you. Like, they're not even coming back. Like, their room is unfucked in and Kyle checked in.

We just call them. They're like, not even coming on the boat today. You know, he's coming on the boat today. You know who's coming on the boat today? I'm hearing Cory. Yeah, I'll be like Montauk. I'll talk about the SS Montauk as in Skete-skete Montauk. Am I right?

Yeah, we're going to try and come at the same time on the boat today. That's her goal. So Amanda is... I love the guy. Amanda's telling the silly citizens about what's going on. She's like, oh my car all centers so much toxic and pages like, she loves it. She's laughing. So then Kyle is telling the guys, he's like, yeah, they might not even come back at all. I mean, you're

just pushing your own snowball down a hill. And the snowball gets bigger and bigger and bigger. I don't know. Rolls right over Amanda and I tell her get up a matter my family's never gonna respect you and Skins again The season on winter house a giant snowball Carines into the house they all die So page is like I'm Lindsey doesn't need Danielle anymore. So she's like a non factor in her life You know Lindsey has a curl now. She doesn't need Danielle and then Danielle is like have you ever Lindsay has Karl now, she doesn't need Danielle. And then Danielle is like, have you ever been so angry

and so upset at the same time? And you don't know what to do about it? I'm like, yeah, that's the Watercraft and Spotcast every single episode. That's like, that's how I am. It's like the last hour of our lives, okay. So everybody gets ready. Let's go through this part more quickly

because it's like an hour and this is where we learn what a show is like without the older people. You've only got Kyle there who's wasted and just doing like Titanic things with Chris. Oh, you know what? If there could not be another, this was Chris. If there could not be one of it, like Chris already drives me nuts.

And then he's like, hey Kyle, Kyle, stand up. Hold on, I'm going to do something really funny. Okay. Okay, say I'm making it the world. And I'm like, you could not, you literally cannot be more basic and annoying Chris. Like, you just, it's like, yeah. And there's like, there's a big boat and a small boat because this is Danielle Day. So of course, it's got to be the most boring outing of all time because that's who Danielle is. Okay. So she has a boat day, but she can't

get a boat big enough for everybody. By the way, there's like eight people, but she can't get a boat big enough. So how did that eight people not fit on that big yacht? Like there's like literally like one giant. Yeah. So it was actually, I actually really enjoyed the disparity between the boats. And I think that this was to create drama I think I think they were hoping that Lindsay and Carl This was clearly set up so a Lindsay and Carl would probably get stuck on the small boat and then have a fit because they just got engaged They should be on the big boat like to me. I saw this as producers all over it But there was no drama everyone was like fine with it. Yeah, or maybe maybe the small boat was going to be Danielle and Lindsay and Karl having

a fight or something, but who knows? It was kind of a bummer because it was just separated on boats for no reason. But of course, Corey and Sam are on the same boat because they're a couple, but then Craig and Paige aren't on the same boat because Craig is like spending all day growing out with Corey and Paige doesn't care. You know, like she literally doesn't care. Paige, she's on the phone. She goes, yeah, Paige has a bigger fish to fry. She's like, oh my gosh, you guys,

their boat makes such an awful sound. They need to check that right, something like that. Because that sounds like a great problem. So, Paige, when I say Paige had bigger fish to fry, I mean, like, she had to shade the small boat as much as possible. She's like, guys, I only have about 90 minutes to do this. So I'm just loading all the small boat shade that I can get.

Ew, it sounds so loud. What a disgusting Lindsay boat. I know. She's like, I'm on the home goods of boats, which I'm very proud of. It's not the cutest, but it's very tasteful and affordable. Ding, like and subscribe. They're in the filings basement of boats.

Okay. That's just sad. Yeah, that's just what a sad small little boat. It's like, it's like someone showing up in high waisted jeans when those are so clearly over like gross, get your zero boat out of here. Oh my god, hi Danielle. So party party Corey kisses Sam a lot page poses for pictures. And page also stands on boats like she's in a music video Which kind of she kind of puts her elbow on top of her other arm and just like kind of moves her hand around and just kind of nods Her head to some kind of beat. I'm not sure if there's even any music playing

But she's like I could be being filmed to music right now. So I'm gonna move my head It's just like I've waited all season long for a boat like this. I've literally preserved my energy by staying only on my bed for eight weeks at a time, only that way I get here on this boat and be ready. I had to be ready for this moment. Meanwhile, for those who have been wondering, Corey did show up. You did mention Corey's here because Cory arrived today. So for those who are wondering

what we may be skipping over with Cory, this is all your mis-muth Cory. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha He does like a silent like back of throat lab like oh He's so annoying and just last week. I was like he really does bring the energy up Please don't ever come back here again. I can't stay. I mean he did he did help the season I hate to say it, but he did help the season and now it's time to like he's awful It's time to go okay the very godmother is in like a couple of scenes not the whole fucking movie Getting a fucking pumpkin and get the fuck out of here with your fake fucking laugh. Okay, so then I would have loved Whitney, I would have loved Whitney to be in all of Cinderella, but that's just not what's gonna work out.

No, she never would have signed up to do it, you know? So this is boring. So Sierra's like, Maya says I have the flatest spot. And then someone texts Maya and it says, hey, I'm live a gray face because they don't have a picture. It's just like an anonymous text from a gray face. And it says, hey, are you an Oliver exclusive? And then we get more words from Maya

than she's ever set on the show, I think, combined. She has a full monologue and she's like, well, I'm here for this last weekend and like I like want to enjoy my friends who have like fun and then all of a sudden I get this text like from this weird DM and it's essentially like cryptic because like I don't even know who this person is but it's like asking me about my status of my relationship with all of her and it's like not like I fucked him or anything It's just like hey are you an all over exclusive and like honestly who the fuck should be asking about my status other than me and him

So like it's like already. I know something's going on and I'm like What's this Well, I've never noticed how much her face moves when she talks. I wish she did this a long time ago to how to my impersonation last year. What a strange use of a finster also, by the way, it's like, I'm gonna use my finster to troll Maya. Like it doesn't make any sense.

I mean, it's gotta be Kwame, right? Like it's clearly Kwame. It was like Kwame's on top of the world. He was just named like the best restaurant in New York City. And he's still like the one that got away, the cookie lady. Yeah. So there's like a, there's a hint of a scandal with Maya on the last second to last episode of the season.

So now then there's like, they're trying to kind of wrap up stuff with Gabby too, because she's like, they're trying to kind of wrap up stuff with Gabby too, because she's like, guys, guess what? My parents, remember I told you how my parents were going to Texas, remember that? Remember that like great story you guys learned about my parents? You don't remember it? It was a good story. They went to Texas. Anyway, they went to Texas. Guess what? They put a house. Another like literally in Texas. Yeah, they're gone. They left me. I'm like, those parents are high-fiving right now. They're like, oh God, I think hopefully this is enough space

to get her out of her. Like, stay in, hopefully she'll just stay in New York. We can finally have her adult lives. Well, I liked it, Paige. I was like, well, I feel like we have the exact same relationship with our parents. So are you devastated? And she's like, no, now I'm going to be co-dependent with you guys

because I've learned how to be co-dependent with you guys because I've learned how to be co-dependent with other people. Paige is like, ew, Craig. Oh my God, it's like thinking of her own life. Like I'm supposed to depend on Craig. Ew, hell no, no way. Hey, do you want to try this as an experiment? We have set up a zip line and you can zip line down to the small boat.

Bye. So then the Titanic thing happens at Sad, I don't want to go over it again. and you can zip line down to the small boat, mate. So then the Titanic thing happens at Sad, I don't wanna go over it again. So then Carl and Lindsay, okay. So Carl and Lindsay drive up to the house. So we're like John John John John John, like the Kia, the Kia of Doom, yes. But I wrote to the Kia's like Doom come.

Don't don't don't, that Kia, by the way, I mean, like that key is getting so much footage. Wow, Christopher Nolan presents key of. So they basically got this key of for free to drive it on the show, right? If they must have, because it's not blurred out, almost every single thing on this show is blurred out. Like sometimes the show looks like they're floating in a cloud

And the Kia is not blurred out so they must have gotten some deal So they come in and Carl's furious and he stalks into the house and he goes into the room Any grabs like a pair of underwear or t-shirt and he throws it over the camera and he's like, oh, I'm packing up myself I'm gonna get going and that's how we are guys. We are not a I Refused to let America see music up my back. This is a private moment. So The producer comes up and she's like um Carl Can we get some footage of you packing up at least and goes oh yeah, there's nothing to show or no

I don't know if you're off on this field at Let's see how I that Lindsay this crack me up. I mean Lindsay Lindsay as this like strange mother figure to Carl she comes it's just me Come on, you know, I know you're pissed off and I'm pissed off too But like we can't just like even vanish. They need to show us. They need to so that way people can see what happened They need to see how we pack our bags babe Like whoa Lindsay. Hey let me ask you something sorry everybody this is just a sight map but when I get loud does it cut off my sound for you Ben. No because when you're yelling

for Lindsay yeah it cuts you off and we need to figure out what that maxing out maybe that was maybe that was that automatic mic thing that we were just talking about. That's why I'm asking if I'm yelling, is it cutting it out for you? Because I feel like, no, it doesn't. And I feel like I don't yell that much. Or I don't yell as loud as I just yelled.

And when I do, I'm like, wow, I didn't know I could yell like that. And no, that that was come off. But I mean, it'll be recorded in my local recording. So, I think it's just trying to figure it out for crap ins on demand stuff. We're trying to get better every day guys said, thank you. That was our backstage talking back to the. Yeah, that was no, we're breaking the fourth wall, just like this scene broke the fourth wall

of the producer saying, Carl, can you please take off the garment from the camera? So yeah, because that was you trying to get t-shirt over the microphone every time you yell like that. Wow, that would also explain why when we did the crap present in the man last week with the Microsoft Windows sounds, why they got all garbled because it was probably auto adjusting the sound. Yeah, there you go guys. You know what? You learned something every day, don't you?

God bless it. God bless. Okay, so moving on, So they're all pissed off. I know you're pissed. I'm pissed off too, but come on now. Like we are on a TV show. And then we see a clip of, we see, oh, I put Lindsay with the blanket over her head,

fighting with Carl. Oh, just cause that's how I match them. Just be like, bam, this is how we look on TV right now, okay? I don't know, I don't know, I don't know. Oh, so Lindsay's like, we can't just like leave in Vanished. It's a TV show. They have to show us packing

because it's a visual medium, Carl, okay? It's a visual medium. They need to see us vanish for when we are vanished on the visual medium that I'm yelling at you about, you're not giving them footage. I'm like, you know what, another way is to get some good footage of you guys? Not to leave. on the visual medium that I'm yelling at you about you not giving them footage. I'm like, you know what, another way is to get some good footage of you guys?

Not to leave. Yeah, well, listen, here's what I'm saying. Don't marry this person, Lindsey, because Carl's like, who's so fucking stupid, I'm sick of this shit. He's taking his toys and going home. Carl has no job. He does not do his job that he's currently doing.

He has no ability to get a job or keep a job as we've learned from this show. This is his job. Your apartment is $13,000 a month and you have a new apartment and you're not going to be getting influencer deals when you're not on this show. What do you two, what exactly do you two think you're going to be doing? I didn't they have like a free Lexus that they got last year or something. I don't know. Where's that Lexus? What's going on with that? So anyway, on the boat we see everyone's doing a toast to Carl and Lindsay, which may or may not be sincere. And then we come back to the package.

They're being sarcastic. Mine's like, of course they are. Sure, sir, in cash, man. And everyone's laughing. And then on the other boat, Chris congratulates Danielle. And he goes, Danielle, you really pulled it off today. I was like, well, how does she pull it off? These are both terrible boring boats. I know. Well, she pulled it off.

She wanted a boring boat ride. So Lindsay's packing and curls, like, the voices of support in the house are being drowned out by the voices of negativity. And it just feels like it's best for us not to be here. I'm like, you, it's over. What part of this being a reality show is suddenly a surprise to you. And then official wars declared because then to guess yes there goes.

And they took the marble loaf back home. Like a dancer on sign felt. They took, they took with a pineapple upside down cake and it literally goes on the soundtrack boom. I was like, wow, not the upside down pineapple cake and there's still a certain amount of confusion about this cake because last week I complained that they didn't turn upside down and then people were like, no, actually it was

turned upside down, but then I went back and I was like, is it upside down. And then people were like, no, actually it was turned upside down, but then I went back and I was like, is it upside down? And then I also said it seemed like the pineapple rings were above the cake, embedded in the cake, but then I don't know. It's a cake of mystery to me, and Lindsay is taking it back. She's taking back her voice.

And then Carl tells us. Just reclaiming her time in the form of pineapple cake. Then Carl tells us, when you're somewhere, you feel like people don't know you and they don't want you and they don't get you or don't understand you or they don't want to understand you. I react by packing up my shit and moving on. You know how I react?

I go up and I take the fucking the bread and the wine anyway because it's free. I just have to kneel there for a couple of seconds. Then when the hat comes over to put a dollar in, I take a five or out. And then on my way out, I say, fuck you to everyone inside my head. And I leave the church, Carl, grow the fuck up.

Yeah, well, when you're somewhere that you're like not wanted, and no respects you, there's only one thing to do. Still to pineapple cake. Yeah. So I down, I'm fine. Okay. Okay. I'm downflat it for me.

Okay. Yeah. Which is, I'm still in this place. I'm still in this place. And luckily there was plenty of room in the back of Mark. He also went though for the upside down pineapple cake. So, goodbye everyone. So the car backs out of the drive.

And it's like, the need to even turn around. They're like, he has like, hi. So it's very important for us that we showcase the car and all its functionality. So we're gonna request that we're gonna give you this free car, but we're gonna request that every time you leave the house, you have to back out instead of doing a normal turnaround,

like every other vehicle thinks. So everyone comes home, wasted, and they're all partying, and Kyle's playing the music through the speakers, and everyone's dancing, and Kyle, a Amanda's like, Kyle, Kyle, Kyle. Until the whole town, like here's the terror alert. Like, I think the shutter is coming down

all over the campus. They're saying, hold on, Kyle. There was two kinks when we left and now one is gone. It's like that old Pat's decline song, two cigarettes in the ass tray. You know that song? Two cigarettes in the ass tray.

And it's basically like a story of like, the lady and her lover have the two cigarettes in the ass tray and then another lady comes in and there's three cigarettes and then by the end of the song, there's just one cigarette in the ass tray. And that's hers. Oh, guys. And Paige goes,

she took the cakes. Oh my god. She starts cracking up. And Chris goes, are they among us now? Are they among us now? Because we're like a family and that's what you say. Are they among us? And Amanda's like, I'm just saying something happened. Since when is Amanda on cake alert?

Amanda's like the- I would be on cake alert. Trim is on cake alert. I would like, excuse me. If there are two cakes in my household, I am hyper aware. I'm like, there's two cakes. I now I'm mentally budgeting how much cake I can have because I know how much cake there is,

and so how do I spend it over the next few days, how I figure out my slices. I am always aware of how much cake is under my roof. So if all of a sudden we go from two cakes to one cakes, that's gonna be a problem for me. Tina who loves his pasta tastes like a cake, you'll learn right now. He's cooking his pasta. He just loves this. He's like, does my upside down pineapple cake? Oh, you do a whole slow slow cake?

A real friends. So, you know what, we're gonna go and we're gonna serve it the way it's supposed to be served. Right side up upside down pineapple cake. Oh, well, let's take that. Yeah, this cake makes a lot of sense because honestly, the lack of support has actually turned me upside down right now, wild. So, Paige is like, oh my God, she took the cake,

that's crazy. I actually respect the fuck out of that move. You know what, just goes to show, grandmother's still got it. Grandma's still got it going on. Um, so Paige, guys, um, cool. I'll take their room tonight then. So got my go. Does she? Listen, she's evil, but she's a funny evil. I'll hand it to her. So,

Kyle's like, uh, you just build a reporter, Krenegit Christina Gibson reporting for duty on the summer early. And then we see six summers ago, which I can't believe it's only been six years. Yeah. Isn't just season 20. So this show began in like 2016. It feels like it started in 2012 for, yeah. And Christina's like, you know, the only thing I'm taking is this. Christina Gibson reporting live from the summer house. Christina Gibson out.

I love that they pulled that reference because that's like one of my favorites. Christina Gibson, RIP, not in real life, she's alive, but like on the show RIP. She's so, I realized she was living in Florida and married and has a baby. She's looking, we follow her on the insta. Hi, she's throughout there.

I love Christina. So, so now, yeah, I call it like, wow, talk about trading places. Am I right? So now the small boat people arrive because they don't, they don't, their boat is not only small but slow, I guess, so that they arrive later. And so they tell everyone like, oh my god, guess what? Then she took back her cake. And so Daniel's going getting so much like this is so crazy.

And as nine like they're gone. They're gone. This is crazy. That Daniel, come on. Like you're, you were, you made it all about you. And that, yeah, you did this. And why are you acting like so shocked So now she's gonna like try and jump to the other side again just so she could say that she did I mean it's stupid thing

Okay, but this is also another Corey trying to heart Corey and Chris are terrible I don't need them on the TV get them off like I want to turn it off at this point. So Corey is just going What What Chris is like let's go in the room, see what they left. They left stuff. Death cowboy hats and Cory's going, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, hats, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, these hats and then Corey takes the cowboy hat and like, like, like, like, looks at the brim and he's like, and he's like, I can't take another goddamn second of this.

So then we go to a C. Lee citizens meeting and Amanda's like, um, here's the thing. They're blaming it all on Danielle. Page, she goes, that is so mean. That is so mean and also untrue. And hilarious. Oh my God, I'll say it again. They're blaming Danielle. She's the reason.

And she goes, you don't want to come on the boat because Danielle's there, then grow up. So then Chris and Corey are still dancing around in hats, trying to do scenes from crocodile dendee and just rolling all over their bed. There's like rolling on the beds, like a total just like lack of respect for the furniture in this place. And so then, Paige is like, so they're like never coming back to Diddlinzy find like a nursing home to move into, I don't understand. And she always like, uh, it's like,

we only have like two more days left, you know, which means I've only got two more days to have a storyline this season. She's like, why am I wasting this adorable sweater bikini for a bed scene? And my, I was like, oh, well, guys, they're not here. So like, why are we still talking shit about that? Well, like, I don't got to impace just like rolls over on her hands and say, I know, I can't help it. It's my joy. It's my gift and my burden. So, me and while Cory is in the window and Craig, and Craig is down by the pool,

and Cory is thinking his hands out to be like, throw me a drink. So Craig throws him a can, and I'm horrified be like, throw me a drink. So Craig throws him a can and I'm horrified because like that could have just like gone right through the window. Hey, they could have just like thrown a can through the window. In fact, I've never wanted something like that

to happen more. Just to have those guys just covered in shattered glass at that moment. You know, Bravo brings us so many fun alcoholic shows, Real Housewives of New York shows real housewives of New York Real housewives of New York Real house. I mean, I guess that's the best one But you know that show knows how to do it where you bring alcoholism in a fun package It's like yeah, they're drunk and you know we get mad sometimes like to Rinda Jesus like it went too dark

But it was still amazing. I mean remember to Ra's last moments in a glitter turbine yelling at the entire production staff and like having her glorious once and melt down and they're witty and they're funny and even if they're wasted, they're making you laugh. This is not that show. This is just sad, hot drug addicts with no personality or quips or one liners or anything going on. This is literally just watching idiot drunk people walk down the street barfing on each other. And it's not fun, dude. The show needs to get it together. You've turned into a winter house.

Congratulations. Yeah, there's an icky sense watching Cory and Chris be so self-satisfied with their drunk and antics. It's like these guys are awful. And on top of that, they're gonna get everything they want in life, you know? Like that's what's so like, it's like, ugh, just like gross, just like two gross guys,

one of whom really likes transphobic memes, just wanna underline that again, just wanna point that out. So anyway, we're also a total piece of shit in real life. So then these guys are throwing beers at each other downstairs. It's just like they're just jumping and they're like tackling people onto like the bed and like breaking the bed and everything. And pages like, what are you two dipshits doing in here?

And then Corey like wrestles my out to the bed and everything. It's just like a lot of rough housing. And by the way, just in general, I hate rough housing. I've always hated it. I've one of my oldest stances, one of my my early hot takes as like a three-year-old. I don't like up rough housing. It's not like that. When Ben really blossomed at three years old, he's like, I do not stand for rough housing. So, I love that. I love that. I love that. A three-year-old Ben has the same voice as Paige, and I'm proud of it.

So here's where it gets awkward. Okay, first of Ben and a same- I'm a real same- I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I love that. I they look like they're having a really great time. I don't care if you're having fun. I'm watching you on TV. I need to be having fun. You know what I mean? I'm not. So they're having a good time. They're all wasted. But it's obvious that it has gone up a lot of notches since Carl and Lindsay left, right? Yeah. Because they're all reveling in it. It's like, ha ha, they left. They all run to their room. They're going through their room, looking for stuff. I mean granted, there were only hats in there. It's like, ha ha, they left. They all run to their room. They're going through their room, looking for stuff. I mean, granted, there were only hats in there, but it does feel like a huge celebration in the house that Carla Lindsey, it turns weird.

You know what I mean? I didn't mean it feels totally weird. I was like, you guys really, here's your true fucking colors. And all this shit I've been saying all year about this is all you guys wanted. It's like you finally get it and now look at you. You're just all acting like you won something and it's gross.

It's gross. It didn't feel like a celebration to me. It's to me it felt like, well I mean obviously when Cory and Chris go in and take the hats, like whatever, but like. I don't think that they care. To me it felt like, I don't think those two care specifically, but I think the rest of them, Amanda, Paige,

everybody else, it seems like yeah, it turns into a bad lump. But I think it's like your team won some soccer game and everyone's overturning cars in the street. I think that's, I think that's imbuing a lot more meaning to it than it was. I think that like social situations, social situations are,

like there are complex things. And like when you remove one or two people out of them, like they, you get a whole different dynamic. It just is, that's just the way it is. That's why casting on these shows is so important, you know? And so if you have two people that are kind of just like, kind of being downers or whatever, it does like affect the entire house.

So I didn't really, I saw it as more of a celebration that like, oh God, it was affecting. So then if it was affecting the entire house because they were being downers, it wouldn't be natural for people to celebrate that the downers were gone. Okay, sure. It's like it's happening to me.

That's all I'm saying. Yeah, but then that's not as much of a, but you're sort of implying that they were celebrating that their evil plan worked You know or like like think like or or yeah Yeah, I'm saying that they'd never like them and that they're glad they're out of the house I would definitely can see that there's like celebration that the downers are gone like oh thank God We can just have fun, you know, okay? Well, then where the although I will say it looks like a celebration, I mean, it's fucking gross. I don't like it.

But I guess I don't see it as a gross to celebration. I see it as a, like, I see it as like a fun celebration. Not even golf bar, I just see it as like, we can have fun. Although I guess you can see it. And even, and you know, we can disagree, like we're allowed, but I think it's gross. And even Danielle agrees with me. And now I'm in the uncomfortable position of being on Danielle's side, which is weird.

This Danielle, this is what drives me nuts. Because Danielle, all of a sudden, is like, she's like, wait, they're wearing the hats, we're not gonna do that. That's one thing we're not gonna do, is that, is that what we're not, is that what we're not, is that, okay. Just to set it up, right?

It's just because Maya says, people are shopping in beginning? It's not. It's like, okay. Just to set it up right. So it's because Maya says people are shopping and Lindsay and Carl's room. Like they're gone. So people are just going into the room and taking stuff. So that's kind of what got Daniel like what? They're shopping. They're like taking their stuff.

Like what do you mean? And Maya's like, yeah. And so Daniel's like, oh, we're gonna be a little better than that. That's what's not gonna happen. Yeah, she basically is like the RA and the college dorm at this moment. Guys, come on, lights up.

And like all it was was two cowboy hats. Like, literally that's the only thing. And she just gets so sanctimonious about it. And I'm like, Danielle, for crying out loud. Like, these people have been terrible to you. Okay, regardless of whether you wanna say whether it was deserved or not, like, from your perspective, they have been awful to you.

They've treated you like shit. And now you're gonna like take up for them on this stupid thing about the hats. Well, everyone is finally having a good time in the house. See, I see it as everyone rolling over and pissing on their grave. And Danielle's like, man, that's a little harsh even when I'm mad at them.

Like this isn't cool. It, because it's like to me, that's a little harsh even when I'm at it, like this isn't cool. Because it's like to me, it's like more than a celebration of them leaving them making that decision is leaving some warehouse. They just quit the show. They just took there, they literally packed up their shit and they left. Like to me, that's them leaving the show. So it's not like, oh, they're gone tonight. To me, it's like a celebration of them being gone in general.

And I think Danielle's kind of having that moment where she's like, well, I chose this team and now they're all like turning over cars in the streets and starting shit on fire. Like they won a game and it feels icky. That's what I'm doing from the whole. To me, it just read as like Danielle's taking her nose into something that was like she didn't fully understand what really was going on and that like it was almost like she was continuing to build her case that like even when there's a fight there's deeper things you consider because that was

her case about the engagement like yeah I may have been beefing about Lindsay but you still include me because at the end of the day we're like deeper friends in that so it's a me it felt like she was actually just I don't know I just to me I felt like she was just taking up for people who just like treat her like shit And it seemed like she had gotten she started to realize that and then she's just doing it all over again And it's like honestly Danielle You're just being a buzz killer right now So she's like What is the topsy-turvy episode? How did this happen? It's crazy. It's a lot. There's a lot

pissing us off and we don't agree on literally anything in the episode, which I like. I think it's fun. So Amanda's like, but she starts fighting with Danielle because Danielle is just told everybody, stop. This isn't cool. And Amanda's like, but Danielle, they're having fun. And she's like, there's nothing fun about it. She's, what's not fun about it? They're not going to come back. And I just say, you know, I met a sucks. Like you finally got people you didn't like out of the house, Amanda. And now you're shitting on their grave and literally rolling around laughing on it.

You are such a fucking evil asshole. And I see everything that Lindsay has said about you. And I triple down on it and agree, you know? Like Lindsay and Carl, I think also made the wrong decision here by leaving and I hate that they gave up. But I think their energy, their comments about the energy that you bring to them is completely true and you've been doing it this underhanded way for years. And I think you're a little fucking asshole and I am so glad you're showing your true

colors. No one took a dump on their bed. Okay, it was Chris and Corey took put on hats and started Galvan to go around with hats. And that was literally the extent of this entire thing. It's the general party atmosphere going on. It's not that, it's that people are literally running all over the house screaming.

I mean, it's not just a hat thing. It's a lot more than that. It's like a whole Downtown, you know party party writing. I Don't know I think it's like they were out on they were out on boats I got drunk on boats the end of the summer. It's their last weekend I think they're just like having fun the downers aren't there, maybe they're celebrating that, maybe they're not. But as far as most of the people in the house just heard, these people said like, oh, we're gonna go hang out with our real friends.

So it's like, well, fuck you, we're gonna have fun. And I think the reason why I have fun. I think this proves our point totally. So Matt is on the stairs. Self-fulfilling process. Hi, all she's mad that people are going into Carla Lindsay's room is like it's off limits. Well, my room is in off limits,

and people come into my room all the time, and I'm still there, and then what's the difference? It's like Amanda pretending she doesn't get it when she does, and Paige is like, okay, Amanda, okay. We're all a little drunk here, and she's, no, but I just don't understand why we're mad about it. And Danielle says it just seems low. It seems low, and it seems stupid,

which here's the one point that sees, and I'm with Danielle. I think it's over dramatic. I think it's an over dramatic thing and that Danielle is like, and I think it's, I just don't think this is a head of Danielle should be dying on.

So, you just said it a third time. I get to say my thing for the third time. So then, like I know, why not? Because the. I get to say my thing for the third time. So then I know why not because the sick you for making up on harping on it. Yeah, we're both harping on it. We're both harping. So you know what, it's my, listen, let me let me let Maya tell us about right now,

especially me, everyone's harping. Thank you. Everyone's a lot. Okay, it's a little hot. For a little testy. A little testy, okay, it's not you, it's summer house, okay Ben? Summery little testy. Okay, it's not you. It's summer house. Okay, Ben Summer house. So my best friends. I love you even when you're this wrong about things like summer house. Okay, I still love you Listen always be careful because I've got a key. Okay, so I can you do you will pick up your

I gotta keep you will throw a shirt over this camera and be done with I'm gonna know I'm sorry I did get a little bit careful. I gotta keep you. You will throw a t-shirt over this camera and be done with it. I'm gonna know. I'm sorry. I did get a little heat. Careful. I did. Yeah, I might just drive off to somewhere. So Maya is, yeah, she's like, I think you're just a little hot right now. Danielle goes, Maya, I think you need to shut the fuck up.

It's like, you know what, Danielle, you know what? Regardless of what side you're on on this, Danielle, like you have been, you created such a scene last weekend. You were crying hysterically. You were being so inappropriate at this party. And then someone has the balls to say, hey, I think you're a little hot. You don't get to just be like, shut the fuck up right now. I'm sorry, like you need to accept

that you've been a little toasty, a lot, a lot hot mic, hot mic on the Danielle, Danielle Leveracam, okay? And Amanda's still doing her like, but we didn't take the hat. Like it's about the hats and it's not about the hats. And Danielle's like, well, it just seems stupid and weird to be doing it, that's it.

And Kyle's like, dude, what the hell? And Maya again goes, I think you're hot right now. And that's some, that's some of Maya's, she's like Maya? Yes, I think you're hot right now. And that's some, that's some Maya's, she's like Maya, yes. I think you need to shut the fuck up. Because also Maya, like why do you get to walk around judging? Who's hot and who's not and who talks too much and who doesn't? You know what? She has to. You know, don't get in someone's way when they're pissed off.

Okay, I tell you to shut the fuck up too. Don't you feel like so much of this could have been avoided if Lindsay had just left the upside down pineapple cake? Yeah, I was like a declaration of war. have been avoided if Lindsay had just left the upside down pineapple cake? Yeah, I was like a declaration of war. It's like We're leaving. No, and we're taking our cake Look, these people got drunk enough that way. They couldn't they wouldn't care about eating carbs And then she took the carbs away from them. So like it's gonna get it's gonna get spicy in there So Danielle does this whole, you know as much as I hate what's happening with them, I'm still

love them and I'm still loyal to them. And people taking shit out of the room is so permanent like it's an ending, which is true, I think it is too. And she's saying an ending that I didn't want. And I say it's an ending everyone else wanted and they manipulated you into helping them. Congrats, stupid. Now you've lost your only link to this show. You think this show gives a shit about you without Lindsay.

Congratulations on the own, the grade that you dug for yourself on this show. Have fun. Yeah, so then they're now all rolling their eyes about Danielle and everything. And mine is like, I don't talk to my friends like that. I don't fight that way. I think Danielle is very much consumed with what's going on with Lindsay. And she's been supportive of me in the past.

And I wanna be supportive of her right now. So wait, is my trying to be supportive of Danielle right now? Or... She's saying Danielle's acting on like an asshole but I'm being supportive of her because it has nothing to do with me She's got her own shit going on like I'm gonna stay. I'm not gonna like take this to personally

So I guess you know what it is like Daniel just ultimately just should not care I think I think she is way too consumed with Lindsay and I think Maya's right and so then we move into this section where Craig Just starts going on this whole like I'll tell you this that bitch is brainwashed. That bitch is like so scared of Lindsay like if Lindsay finds out anything Danielle said that bitch is in trouble. I was like, Craig, please stop talking and please stop saying bitch and just go to bed. You fucking loser. He's only here to fight pages battles at this point. Like, why would Craig care about Lindsay brainwashing anybody? I mean, he's so filled with someone

else's ideas too. I can't. This show is going to give me an amurism. It's an hour and 36 minutes into this. Okay. And we still can almost as long as the actual summer house, which went on for three hours. So Daniel is talking to Kyle about how, they're engagements not about me, but let them go off to the sunset or the moon or wherever Carl says he's gonna walk to. But I was hoping there'd be a glimmer of hope that Lindsey didn't know that I was left out,

but now I know, I know that she knows I was left out. And that means I don't matter to him or to them and it was a blatant stab in the heart and Looking me in the eye. That's what I felt like hands off that's everyone hands off that's can't help it So don't you're not getting married you fucking douche They're not asking you to marry them and why are you dressed in an embroidery pattern? It's weird Okay, it's like a it's a bat. It's like a hobby an embroidery pattern? It's weird. It's like a, it's a bat. It's like a hobby lobby embroidery pattern that you're wearing. Please go away. So now that all get, they're all getting dressed for dinner. It's evening time because

Corey, in case anyone forgot, Corey has arranged a gratitude sushi night, which the real gratitude would have been to ordering sushi. But instead, it's going to be like, Corey makes sushi for everyone. I don't know where this came from. I don't know if I want like Corey making my sushi to be honest, but while he's doing it, Craig and Corey are setting up this table, but they're also kind of like throwing lanterns and items into the pool, which is just like very eye-roly. And then Craig is like, yeah, this girl stood up for Lindsay for years and

she's like, there's no way I was wrong for six years. So she's still protecting Lindsay. Oh, God, cut the performance for page two. You're sipping, okay? You're doing for page right now. What Dan Y'all has done for Lindsay for years. You're performatively battling the enemies of someone who will never consider you her equal. So cut the crap. Shut up. My, your business. someone who will never consider you her equal. So cut the crap. Shut up. My your business. So back to the sushi. They're they're rolling these rolls and everything and Craig's like the Zazoo Keeney or a cucumber and it's of course like I don't know, try it. So Craig just like bites an end off of it and it's like it's cucumber and then he puts it back into the sushi pile. So

congratulations everyone. You all have Craig juices it's cucumber. And then he puts it back into the sushi pile. So congratulations everyone. You all have Craig juices in your sushi. And then Craig and Corey start throwing shoes in the pool and they throw the lights. They throw the house's lights into the pool like lanterns and stuff. And they think they're like hilarious and start pouring sake down each other's throats.

And she'd in the pool. It's like, there's no way to make a sheet. Yeah, they get rid of the baking sheet. So Paige comes out. She's like, um, someone's shoes around the pool and they're edley. So I'm not, I'm embarrassed for the pool mostly. So could you guys remove that from the pool? The pool is actually tasteful before those shoes are in there.

So. So they all cheers, cheers to the family. And then we have a game. It's called X-rated Shurades. I didn't take any notes on the X-rated Shurades. I'm officially done with this show. This show needs to end now. Well, guess what?

There's more. So this is when they started doing Craig and Corey's game X-rated Shurades, I was like, okay, I've aged out. I'm tapping out of this show. Yeah, I can't deal with the games anymore. The two truths in the lie, truth and dare, never have I ever, like literally Bravo,

whatever exec is approving this, you literally need to be fired right now. You've ruined a good show. You've taken a show about real friends who actually go to the city or go to Montauk from the city to rent a house together into whatever the fuck bachelor rip-off shit show. This is terrible. So here's two truths and a lie. Okay. I love these games

no one in the audience enjoys watching them and Anyone who does these games on Bravo should be fired. So where's the two truths in the live? Yeah The first to your true no, the first and the third or two the second was the first was a lie. I said I love these games That's what I meant. I'm throwing a bea-learn the pool. Okay, so then Craig goes inside and we see him calling his mom And he's wasted like fall down drunk. God knows how much coke is in him at this point And he's just like oh bomb. I just wanted to say happy birthday. I didn't forget my I Just I'm glad I like I got a chance to simmling Yeah, my, I'm glad I, like, I got a chance to simmling. Cause like, I looked down to see my calendar and I was like, fuck, I mean, sorry.

Shit. Yeah. It's like, wow, glad you got the fuck out of there to add a shit in there on your mom's call. Well, you're fall down drunk. I'm sure she's super proud. You know, mom's, his mom is in Delaware like, I hope those pillows work out. Because one fucked up kid.

Craig's family has a very low rent version and succession going on. So Kyle, meanwhile, while he's crying to his mom, Kyle's like lifting weights and stuff and Sam and Cory go into the closet and they have sex. And then now Craig walks into the mega bedroom and he's like crying. And the girl's like, are you crying?

Craig, are you crying? Are you crying? And Paige's like, you're crying? Like, why are you crying? Like, that's gross. That's stupid. You're a cry baby. Can't even make a bed if you're crying.

I thought she was actually pretty nice because I would be dismissive. Because he's drunk. You know when drunk people and drugs start crying at the end of the night, you just, you're dismissed. Now, you know, I'm not taking you seriously because you're fucked up. So she's like, are you crying? And he's like, yeah, because of a lot of different stuff.

And she's stuff from just right now. He's like, uh, just come to see what you're doing. She's, wait, but what happened though? I'm not. I'm good. I'm not just, but I'm asking, what are you crying about? And he goes, nothing, I'm good. Seriously, she asked everyone else.

She's like, I'm might be crazy right now. Yeah. And the man is like, he just doesn't want to talk about it right now. OK. Craig, why won't you look at me? Craig, look at me. Why won't you look at me? Because everyone in the world can see something's wrong,

except the one person I want to see. Because did I not just ask you seven times? I was like, you fucking ambassil. How many times have to say what's wrong? What is wrong? Literally the one person in the world that can't see. Everybody else is ignoring you. Weirdo.

Craig and Carla doing the same thing this episode, which is like, why don't you check on me? Basically, man, baby. Yeah, man, baby. So then the page solace him into the bathroom and he's like, look, it's like every non-mine of a feeling or get upset, your response is stopped being such a fucking pussy. Okay, Craig, this is officially a pattern with people that you date. Have you considered listening to them? You know, maybe when everybody is telling you the same thing, it's you.

Yeah. So then, can we hear Paige? She throws his mic off and we hear Paige vomiting. And Sarah goes, are you throwing up? And she goes, I think so. And her vomit's like, black. Her vomit sound is like black, black, black, pineapple upside down cake, black, black. Black. Black. Black. Black. Black. Black. Black. Black. Penetra pull up side down. Okay. Black. Black. Black. Black. Black.

Okay. So then Craig and Kyle are in bed and Craig's like, I miss my mom's birthday. And he's like, uh, his page okay. And I'm sure she's freaking out. But like, you know what, I need, I need a solid rock in my life. That's what I need. And he's like, but you have a solid rock. Your pillow company, which is gonna last forever. And listen, who's gonna get sick of $200 pillows?

Nobody that's you. And, you know, page, another solid one. Just by the record, I don't know if Craig appreciates his pillows being called the solid rock, but you know Not not the branding we use for the pillows Good for our solid Solid as a rock so Craig is basically sometimes I just feel really alone And like okay great, bye. So Kyle goes into his bed.

Now it's nighttime, like late night, and everyone's getting to bed. And Kyle walks into the bedroom and goes, hi Amanda, why do you twist your body like that? And she's like, Kyle, what is wrong with you? Why do you do that? Why do you always wake me up? It's so rude.

Because you're very nice. It's broken. Because your neck looks broken. Okay, this is what I'm saying about the old school people still being able to keep it up. Kyle's a fall down drunk. He's still entertaining. Keep casting like that.

Cast more of those, you know? I wish it was fun. You look like you're not cause broken. And that's also set to funny way that Amanda would naturally sleep Of course she sleeps like a victim, you know Like Amanda sleeps like someone who just threw themselves out of the top story of a building. Of course she does So it's the next day and people are waking up and Craig turns the page just you on a show with me

She goes hmm. Yeah, I guess hold on one last morning vomit with me. She goes, hmm, yeah, I guess hold on one last morning vomit. What? What? Full price. Full price. Full price, but it in Maya's like, oh, man, I was just dreaming that I was making French toast sticks and I hadn't turned them all over so I can't wake up right now. I got a finished turning over my French toast sticks. So some people are starting to wake up and get ready for the party and page stumbles down the hall looking for a razor. And of course, she's just going to like

the mattress members to be like, Hey, what's going on? You guys crack is crying. I can't. And my eyes like, Hey, we're just talking about you. How you feel, sweetie? We're just talking about you, sweetie. I'm going to call you sweetie a lot right now. I'm ready to go. He just wakes up in the morning like nothing happened. It's crazy. Yeah, Craig always acts so traumatic and then it's like my fault and then he gets like mad that I'm not sensitive. I'm like, you were literally throwing up and not feeling well, it's like not the time

to be at attention all. I mean, attention to where. I mean, all night long, all I could hear was, yeah. Where was he at work? And Craig comes in with his hands down his boxer short. It's a grabbing his weiner and he's like, you coming? And she's like, one minute, I have to finish complaining about you. I'll be right there.

So she's like, she's telling us, I get to Craig is going through an emotional whirlwind, but at the same time, Craig's crying on a Saturday night because he missed his mom's birthday, and I'm not comforting enough. Like, where were you when I was barfing up the dinner that you made me? Where were you that? Yeah. Can we talk about why she was throwing up so much? Probably because there was like Corey's ball juice on her Machi roll. Yeah. So Craig does something wrong, like getting so fucking shit face. He doesn't remember his mom's birthday. And then everyone else is mean to Craig and he's the big victim. No, you're the one who fucked up. If anyone gets a scene crying right now, it's your mom cut to her.

Yeah. Cut to the person who has a clean up all the shit out of the pool that you threw in there. How about that? Like he, like he, he's like like totally destructive and then wonders why people don't want to get close to him. So, um, anyway, but meanwhile, pageant, like Sierra and the girls, they're all just like laughing out, correct? Because they predict that he's going to come, that he was just like waiting for page and just like taking a shower and like sad, he's going to come in and be like, are you coming? And so he comes in and it's like, you coming. Like he does exactly what they predict. So they're all just like giggling. And then meanwhile, and he was like, this is the one time

we had to have a low time page. And she's like, I'm Craig. They were talking to me about what a loser you are. And he's like, yeah, you have to make priorities. I'm tempted if they just keep flashing, because I called it. So meanwhile, now they're just sort of like generic activity happening.

They're starting to plan out the party. They're gonna be making it like a jungle theme. And I love that page and Craig are working on turning like the the the not the Bay wind of the French doors into something that looks like a lion's mouth that you walk out of at the party, which I was like I don't know how they're even gonna do that. And then all of a sudden they do do it. And I was like, oh, actually, that's so bad. That's so bad. And now the kill, sorrow and toe of doom. That's so good.

And down the drive. And we hear Lindsay going, and you think about it, that's some last time we're driving down the driveway this summer. And ever, probably, you two, you get. And so of course, all right, here we go. Just, okay, bam, so don't forget the same bames bames Mames, it's like

Mames we got this So they walk in and we hear Lindsey got hello And calls like Next time all the season, Sonal. Is that Neenie from Top Chef, who I spied? And the end, did you see her? It was from far away, and I couldn't tell. And I haven't seen Neenie from Top Chef in a very long time.

I don't know. I didn't notice that. At that point, it was when I was watching this, it was late at night, and I had aged five years watching the episode. So the last, my, my new geriatric eyes cannot pick out the details of anyone. I have aged 10 years doing this recap. I just want to say Ben, I do love you. I'm sorry. I got snappy. I love you too. Oh, it's fine. So the show gets me so upset. I don't know why I'm so upset.

Well, that's what people get upset because the thing is that the show actually, for as mundane and as boring as it can be, although I actually did think this was a relatively good episode, just too long. It did not need to be super sized, is that it does get to the core of like friendships and these gray areas of friendships and relationships navigating between them. It is not like, you know, it's not clean. And you see how we have two totally different perspectives that probably say something about our worldviews. But that's what makes this show interesting is that a lot of people can relate to these situations they bring their

own experiences. So anyway, I'm going to stop talking because we're about three hours into the recap and we've got more work to do today. So anyway, thanks everyone for being here and for listening. And yeah, thank you for allowing us to like have this job where we can sit here and get stressed out because this is a blessing and we thank you guys every day for this. Thank you for being here. This is also crap and on demand. Go check out. It's there's going to be tons of crap and some demand coming. Come back for the Venter Promp Rules recap, for sure for our big announcement on what we're going to be doing this year with our video and all that other stuff. And we will talk to you tomorrow for a little real housewives in New Jersey. Okay. Bye. Watch what crap ends would like to think it's premium sponsors. Ain't no thing like Allison King. Ashley Savoni, she don't take no baloney.

Dana C, Dana Duh. She's not just a Sheila, she's a Daniella. Itchles. Aaron McNickles, she don't miss no trickleess. Jamie, she has no less namey. Hava Nagila Weber. Sip some scotch with Jessica Tratch. She's always supplying, it's Kelly Ryan.

Kristen, theiston Anderson. You're never alone with Lacey Montellan. Let's give a Kisarino to Lisa Lino. Megan Berg. You can't have a burger without the burger. The Bay Area Betches Betches and our super premium sponsors. Somebody get us 10 C C's of Betsy Andy. We're taking the gold with Brenda Silva. Let's get real with Caitlin O'Neal.

Don't get salty with Christine Pepper. Can't have a meal without the Emily sides. Nobody holds a candle to Jamie Kendall. She's not harsh. She's Jill Hirsch. My favorite Murto, Karen McMurto. We love him madly. It's Kyle Podd Chadly. Let's go on a bender with Lauren Fender. We wanna hang with Liz Lang.

The incredible edible Matthew sisters. Nancy C. C. Sinto. Give him hell, Miss Noel. Rang-Ring-La Rue. Choose the Queen Bee, it's Sarah Lemke. Shannon, out of a cannon Anthony. Let's take off with Tamela Plane. She ain't no shrinking Violet CTar. We love you guys.

Hey Prime members, you can listen to Watcher Crappens Add Free on Amazon Music, download the Amazon Music app today. Or you can listen Add Free with Wondry Plus in Apple Podcasts, before you go tell us about yourself by completing a short survey at Wondry.com slash survey. Celebrity Beef, you never know if you're just going to end up on TMZ or trending on Twitter or in court. I'm Matt Bellasive. And I'm Sydney Battle, and we're the host of Wendry's new podcast, Dis and Tell. Each episode explores a different iconic celebrity feud, from the build up, why it happened,

and the repercussions. What does our obsession with these feud say about us? We're starting off with a pretty messy love triangle between Selena Gomez and Justin and Haley Bieber, a seemingly innocent TikTok of Selena talking about her laminated eyebrows. It snowballed into a full-blown alleged feud. But it doesn't seem like fans are letting up anytime soon. Despite both Selena and the Bieber's making public statements denying any bad blood, how much of this is teen jealousy and lovers quarreling, and how much of it is a carefully crafted

narrative designed to sell albums. Follow this and tell wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen ad-free on the Amazon music or wonder-y-a. Raising kids can be one of the greatest rewards of a parent's life. But come on, someday's parenting is unbearable. I love my kid, but is a new parenting podcast from Wondry that shares a refreshingly honest and insightful take on parenting. Hosted by myself, Megan Galey, Chris Garcia, and Kurt Brown-Oller, we will be your resident, not so expert experts.

Each week we'll share a parenting story that'll have you laughing, nodding, and thinking. Oh yeah, I have absolutely been there. We'll talk about what went right and wrong. What would we do differently? And the next time you step on yet another stray Lego in the middle of the night, you'll feel less alone. So if you like to laugh with us

as we talk about the hardest job in the world, listen to, I love my kid, but wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen ad free on the Amazon Music or Wondery app. you