Watch What Crappens - Summer House MV: I Have a Girlfriend in Canada
Episode Date: May 30, 2023*Also avail as video on Crappens On Demand http://bit.ly/crappensvideo* Bria and Silas fight about Bria inviting her boyfriend to the Summer House and it looks like she's going to leave. Will... this show be able to keep a cast? And is Nick's sudden girlfriend confession real? This week's premium bonus is a recap of Below Deck Sailing Yacht For bonus episodes and video recaps, join Patreon at patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens Tour Dates: https://www.watchwhatcrappens.com/2023-cheater-brand-tour/See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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Go to audible.com slash breakthrough. Follow along using hashtag BreakthroughXAudible. I'm not a cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, cracker, crack, crack, crack, crack, crack, cracker, crack, cracker, crack, crack, crack, crack, cracker, crack, crack, cracker, crack, cracker, crack, crack, crack, crack, crack, crack, crack, crack, crack, crack, crack, crack, crack, crack, crack, crack, crack, crack, crack, crack, crack, crack, crack, crack, crack, crack, crack, crack, crack, crack, crack, crack, crack, crack, crack, crack, crack, crack, crack, crack, crack, crack, crack, crack, crack, crack, crack, crack, crack, crack, crack, crack, crack, crack, crack, crack, crack, crack, crack, crack, Well, hello and welcome to Watch My Corruptions!
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On your bros.
Hi everybody, I'm Ronnie.
What a happy Tuesday it is, guys, to be here.
So happy.
You know who else is happy?
Ben, who's here too?
Get over here, man.
I'm so happy.
I'm very happy.
So happy.
Happy.
Guys, I'm so happy. We were just talking. I thought I was odd, so happy.
We were just talking before this recap and cracking each other up, so that's why it looks
like I've been sobbing.
Because I was.
Okay, happy tears.
Sopping up.
I literally made myself sweat.
Like my t-shirt has actual dots.
I was laughing so hard before we came on the air that I began sweating.
I had to turn the air on like really hard because I'm like, I cannot be like red faced and wet for our video that we're doing.
And Ronnie your skin, you know you get it a lot.
This is like a thing.
People are loving your skin, but this is your skin.
This may be this may be the peak of your skin right here or not the peak of this may be
the best that's ever looked right now on this.
I'm just looking at it right now.
It looks like a small baby skin.
Well, you know, a lot of it is just because of lighting, guys.
Just got some new Amazon lighting delivered.
It's like Amazon, doing that, I want the youth filters.
And so they sent me some.
So thank you, everybody, it's very kind.
Okay, so guess what, and bit, especially bit.
Thanks, that's what. I was just waiting for that. I just wanted to be thanked for
for complimenting your skin. Yeah, because you gave me the compliment. I'm like,
thank you, world. It's like, that was nice. Okay. So I'm part of the world.
Life shows we're about to start our last leg of this tour. Next week we are in San Diego, followed by St. Paul, Chicago, Columbus, Austin,
Foxwoods, casino, for the finale, which we're very excited about. So come see us guys. Watch
at Crappinets.com is where you get ticket links. That's also where you find links to our YouTube
or Patreon. Patrons where we have our videos, we're on video now all the time.
So if you would rather do this as a video podcast
or watch us sometimes, do it on Patreon.
Crappin's on demand, come out there
the second they're released.
If you want them free, you can watch them free as well,
a week after they've been released.
So we're gonna build a pretty big catalog over at YouTube.
Thanks to everybody who's supporting us over YouTube.
It's fun, it's like small little growth,
just kind of jumping into the YouTube pond.
Yeah.
We're having a great time.
So thanks for being with us.
Yeah, it's been super fun so far.
And very excited for this week of Summer House.
This is a big week on Bravo.
We've got reunions, galore, and we have...
So we didn't, we're not doing Atlanta this week,
but we did both watch it.
We are, me recapping Martha's Vineyard today,
but Atlanta, you know, this was a good week to skip,
because not much, not a huge amount happened,
but I will say, like one thing that I was amused at
for this episode is that we got like a little bit
of a follow up from where the previous episode ended.
The previous episode ended with Marlowe basically yelling at Drew Sadorah about her nephew Quentin
who was shot and killed tragically and Quentin used to be a like a line chef or line cook
or he worked in some capacity in the kitchen at Old Lady Gang.
And so Marlow is now doing this whole thing
where she's like, I can't believe Candy didn't send flowers.
I can't believe this in that or whatever.
And then she's like, I just was cracking up that she goes,
I mean, what are these shootings keep happening at Candy's
restaurants?
And I just was like laughing at like the shameless way that she's trying to drag
Candie through the mud. People just keep getting shot at old lady gang and blaze.
Yeah, she's really trying to make this a national crisis. It's not, don't start the problem.
Candie's the problem. So, the woman is so ridiculous.
She came back with the season, like, look at me.
I'm just such a nice person, like trying to do her new
personality thing, but she's not.
She's still gross. She's bringing the showdown for me.
I have to say, but I was cracking up
at her having her diva attitude with these new people
who are obviously going to kiss her butt for screen time.
And she's going off of that. her diva attitude with these new people who are obviously going to kiss her but for screen time.
And she's going off about how it's so unfair for her after she slashed that woman's
face.
She's like, guys, that woman didn't kill herself until years after I slashed her face.
And they're still holding it against me like I did it.
That is just so unfair.
And you know, Candy says that she does this for people.
She does that for people.
Well guess what?
Candy's never tried to get my record expunged.
I'm like, what the fuck?
What is Candy?
At some point, you just have to do things.
You can't start saying that you are this,
like, when you're sort of talking about
like you are an accomplished woman,
you have the archive, you're independent,
you could do this and that, you've risen above
your humble beginnings and hardship, et cetera,
all great stuff, and then be like,
but she didn't help me get my record expunged.
Well, you do it.
You do it, do it, Google sir.
Who has ever said that before?
Like, oh really, oh, you're such a giver, right?
Well, if you tried to get my parking tickets
taken off my right hand,
I'm gonna to my insurance,
I'll go fuck yourself, you faker.
But that's what I think is so funny about Marla
because it's so shameless and delusional.
So, and I always look for that in my real house.
So I have that's like a defining quality for me.
That's something I really like.
So I appreciate that she brings that
as opposed to kind of the rest of the cast,
which went to Birmingham.
I'm sorry, Candy didn't go because she had to go
to the Ebony 100 list.
She had to actually do something that was important
that recognized that she actually is very accomplished.
So for as much as Marlow is trying to be like,
well, I guess it's the following she has
that comes to this restaurant that's always
causing the shootings.
It's like candy is literally being honored by any one hundred.
And then who is the other one who didn't do it on the trip?
Drew is missing a lot of work.
She's selling.
I don't know how Drew thinks she's going to work out for her.
She pulled in the kill ease in her throat?
She filled her a full her throat kill ease. Yeah, she's
Just not showing up and Drew you're too new and you're too like
Interesting to just not show up unless it's one of your scenes. You didn't come to the beginning party because she just didn't feel good Okay, you didn't come the opening party. Then you're not coming on the first cast trip thing.
Yeah Drew, you're really not interesting enough
to be pulling this shit already.
Okay.
Well this is why you know there's problems in the marriage
because she's avoiding too much exposure
and too much grilling.
That's what I'm going to start to say.
So it's Ralph's fault.
Everything is Ralph's fault.
Let's be honest.
Oh, I wouldn't be surprised if it was.
But yeah, she's not coming.
Then they've got this new girl who's just...
Courtney!
Courtney!
I'm Courtney!
I'm Courtney!
So I'm here.
I want to hear what you want.
She's like the Wicked Witch left.
Courtney!
I'm so sorry to hear about you and her. She's like that the wicked witch left. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait movie together. She starts bragging like, I know your life partner person,
we did a film, twa,
and she's like, oh, I'll call him right now.
And she's like, wow, okay, so they call him
and then Kenny is like, he was hot in the 90s.
Not just leave it at that.
Yeah, I thought he's still cute,
but yeah, he was hot back then.
Oh, wasn't hot in the 90s.
I mean, Jesus Christ, Kenya, you want to throw up some 90s pictures?
Not fair.
Yeah, it's not fair to anybody to throw up 90.
Although Kenya is still banging.
Kenya has.
Kenya's banging.
Kenya's banging.
She looks a lot different, obviously, but she's still.
Some days, cat calling. Now, there was a very uninteresting update on Sonya, which is that her brother-in-law
quit as her assistant. That will forever go down in the history books of Bravo as one of the most
uninteresting arcs that we've seen. Oh, truly.
And also, Sonya in general, listen,
I like Sonya's personality in general.
I like her energy.
I get it, you know, like successful, all that.
I do not need another person juggling their eye
cow on my screen.
I've got canned food for that.
Do I have to listen to fucking Sonya
talking about how busy she is every five minutes of the day?
I literally do not care.
Go away.
Doing the point of the fuck out of me.
I can't. Yeah.
I really liked Sony last season because I felt like she a lot of,
I think she's like a very like winning personality, no pen intended.
And she's like, lovely and interesting and successful and accomplished.
And I feel like she also has like this sort of personality that could like be
really good on this show, especially once her pitchflarer blooms.
But sometimes cast members on these shows
in their second season, they don't rise the challenge,
they just become more entrenched in stupid things
in their domestic life that we don't care about.
I mean, look at Megan King Edmonds,
talk about a failed second season.
I mean, she was the one,
she was gonna be the next star of that franchise, which goes about this week.
So I think Sonia is like, yeah, I think that she finds
that all the stuff going on with her family
is way more interesting to us than it is.
Like, it's not, it's not interesting.
Well, I think that Atlanta has a casting problem
in general, and I think they're running it
at the same problem already this season
that they have the last few seasons, which is they won't make any changes because they have these huge stars.
Kenya, candy, they have these people and I'm not saying fire them. I'm not saying fire everybody. But you can't just say, okay, well, we're gonna, we're gonna just keep it the way it's going. It's obviously not going well. Okay. Just look at the ratings for the last.
They've just plummeted. You're being beat now all constantly. And it's not cool. This
is Atlanta. This is the best housewives. This has to be the top effort made to keep
this show good. And you can't keep it by keeping people like Sonya who don't do anything.
They don't do anything. And then you've got Drew, who's, we like goofy Drew,
Marlow was terrible.
I cannot believe they gave Marlow a peach
for a second year in a row.
She's a fucking waste of space.
I can't believe, she brings it down.
She's trying to start these stupid,
vial fights with everybody that aren't even fun fights.
And it's just, it's not working, guys,
make an effort over it.
It's not working, it is 100% not working.
I give Marlow some credit for trying.
I give, you know, Drew, I can't actually.
I'm gonna go to work.
This is housewives.
Trying does not work.
It's not good enough.
Yeah, I think I agree with you.
I think your entire theory is correct.
And I feel like the tone of this show is sort of moved into like not much is going on.
So we see them a lot of times.
Like there's a lot of attention to them being like shady to each other and joking.
And it's all funny.
It's like funny to watch.
The funny quips, the interviews are always like pretty funny.
There's always like funny little graphics, but it's sort of like after the laughter subsides.
There's often not a huge amount going on that's terribly compelling.
And like this episode was
Was kind of it like you know we saw they go to Birmingham
I mean I mean I was I was definitely laughing at the amount of coughing that was happening on that bus and like Marlowe
You know and Kenya's coughing and I was like, and then there's just like but there's like a lot of you know
It's like it's like girl like girl time and then they get to a restaurant, and they face time,
Courtney's, you know, baby daddy,
and it's like, oh yeah, there he is, he's not as cute.
And then it's like, saying,
that's true, instead of clue,
it's like, I'm a sexy clown.
And hey, let's have a competition.
Anytime it's like, there's, let's have a competition.
Like, that's the stuff that drives me nuts,
because that doesn't happen in real life.
And that's clearly something that has to fill the time
because there's nothing else going on with them.
So then we got to the Marlow Kenya fight,
which was the big thing of the episode,
which didn't even, there was no reason to even fight.
Kenya was just like, what happened after we all left that
car to the roof thing?
Last week, the Drew singing moment, when we all left, I heard stuff happen and then Marlowe
was like, what?
What are you saying?
What are you saying?
What are you saying?
And then she starts getting mad because Kenya is asking about the fight and then they're
just saying, why were you yelling at Drew, which was the whole thing, but then that started
Marlowe getting pissed off at Kenya and trying to have her moment with Kenya because Kenya
is like the biggest fish in that sea.
So she's going to try and bring down the biggest fish.
She's going to go for Kenya.
She's going to go for candy.
And it's like get a reason.
Like get up out of a reason.
It's Kenya.
You have so many reasons to go.
Like Kenya will always give you a reason, right?
She hasn't given you one yet.
Like she's actually been nice to you.
And here you go for Kenya for no reason.
So then, then I ends with them being like, oh, what Kenya's going to bed? This is summer. We need to play
Let's go get her out of bed. So they start banging on her door
I'm sure they're doing it taking the door. Yes, and then Kenya starts screaming at them and saying oh my child is in here
How dare you and then everyone else is like oh, yeah her kids here so they kind of back off
But Marlowe doesn't.
She just keeps knocking and going,
been put her to bed, been put her to bed.
This is summer.
It's like, this is, this is just not what I consider fun.
It's not like I'm totally mortified.
That Marlowe would knock on the door.
It's nothing like this I'm offended by.
I'm just offended that it's like,
that's what you think is entertaining is just like
slamming on somebody's door and screaming at them for having a baby there. It's like get rid of Marlo
Get rid of Marlo make more of an effort for casting you guys. I also think Kenya's live shows on the air and you can't just let it sink like this and it is sinking
Yeah, and you know, I love I really do love Kenya, but I feel like she is kind of flagging
I think that she you know, I think ever since Kenya's sort of stepped into motherhood,
she's been trying to be like a little bit more motherly or whatever.
And like, you know, when she's in villain mode, she's like sort of in a class by herself.
But like, she's sort of not, she, I feel like she is not always interested in being villain mode.
It's like God forbid, she wants to be a real human being.
But yeah, so she sort of doesn't, I feel like Kenya does a lot of self-producing lately,
so that's really not so entertaining.
And also like that big climactic moment, it was funny.
I mean, I was definitely laughing at how crazy it was for like five seconds.
You give me five seconds at the end of the episode.
But like also, and I, you know, I love going to this old thing, this old chestnut, which is this would have
been at minute 20 on like season 9 of Real Housewives of New York.
This would be minute 15 or 20 on Potomac, maybe even Miami these days, like a moment like
that, that would just be a crazy moment in a show that, in an episode
that always is providing lots of crazy moments because it was just a moment.
It wasn't even a scene, it wasn't anything.
But on this show, they have to make that as like the cliffhanger because that's all that
they have.
Admittedly, when they went to their charity event, that was also funny because they all
dressed up for a very fancy charity event and they got there.
It was like a cocktail, it was like a casual cocktail party and they were all over
dress and then they got kicked out because there were too much for distraction.
That was kind of funny too, but not a great episode.
Yeah, I just, I worry for it because like I said, it was my favorite for years and years
and so okay, so let's go over to... Soma House.
A new favorite.
A new favorite.
A new favorite.
A new favorite.
A new favorite.
A new favorite.
A new favorite.
A new favorite.
A new favorite.
A new favorite.
A new favorite.
A new favorite.
A new favorite.
A new favorite.
A new favorite.
A new favorite.
A new favorite.
A new favorite.
A new favorite.
A new favorite. A new favorite. A new favorite. A new favorite. A new favorite. covering Dancing Queen's either, because like we said, there's too much stuff, sorry, but that show, I love it. It's classic Bravo, it's great.
So the fact that they have two shows in a row
on at the same time that are just giving pure Bravo,
you guys still got it, you still got it, guys.
We still got it.
You know, and you know, we loved an eye,
especially loved Real Girlfriends in Paris
one season wonder, as we called.
Love that.
Like Bravo's little contrain' out good stuff. Summer House, Martha's season wonder, as we called. Love that. Bravo is a little good stuff.
Summer House, Martha's Vineyard, really enjoying.
And this is an example of a show that can show people
just kind of hanging out.
And they're so interesting that you're happy
to be a fly on the wall.
So, like you put moving, they just don't set a route.
They do.
They keep it moving.
Now, I will say that they're doing the opposite of what Atlanta is doing, and they're doing
a little too much of it.
Like Atlanta refuses to fire anybody.
These people are literally just kicking people out all the time.
How do you do that?
They're a lot of indoor.
You know, I don't feel much of that.
This show is good because of the conflict.
You can't just keep kicking out people because there's conflict.
That's literally the point of reality TV.
So I get Phil was a bit much, you know, pooping in toilets and etc.
I get that, but too much.
You put in toilets.
Mariah was uncool.
And this, it looks like they're going to kick out Brea.
You can't, you just can't do that, you guys, every single time, okay?
The rest of it, so, all we're're gonna be left with is fucking the sound of slideless slapping ass up against
His wife which we haven't talked about yet, but that is some porny sex that there is like that is like undulations like
Carlisle and Z. Wish so
That is I'm being listened. I mean I've got a lot of love. I've never seen in the infrareds at the high of the way I've never seen a girl like that.
Like that is a, that is like Martha's Vineyard is.
When they say it, like it was shook, it was shaking.
But so largely I agree with you.
I like, it is a bit of a revolving door,
but it's actually sort of
codifying, um, uh, Silas as a, as a really great villain, as this guy who keeps,
he keeps people out of the house, like that's hilarious. And so it's, it's sort of, he's like an
evil king and waiting for the uprising. Well, and they keep replacing people with interesting people,
which is helping as well, you know, um, yeah, That's surprising that they're able to do that so well.
Yeah, this group has some interesting people.
The guy they bring in today,
I thought this guy was gonna be a shady queen.
So I was a big surprise that he's not gay,
but he's not, and he's still shady.
Still just a shady, shady as a queen.
So I have to say, well done.
Yeah, I literally thought like,
I thought he was gonna be another gay, you know? Yeah, I literally thought like, I thought he was,
I thought he was gonna be another gay,
but then I remembered it's Bravo.
They can't have two gays on.
They can't have one gays at a time.
Yeah, you don't want those sex sounds slapping,
those slapping sounds with the gays in the house.
They don't want to give the rules.
No, it would be too cruel to give a potential love
interest to a gay cast member, Bravo.
Yeah, gay people are okay as long as they're sexless
as we've learned on Bravo.
Okay, which I'm surprised I don't have a show there, honestly.
I'm like the most sexless gay there is.
So where's my solo show?
It's time for commercial.
It's time for a crap and it's coming.
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I'm going to say something scandalous running.
Go on.
Plants are meat.
And not only are they meat, they're delicious,
especially if they're from impossible foods.
They taste like beef.
Exactly.
Impossible is making meat history this summer.
Yeah, they are.
Summer of impossible.
I am so excited to be spending time,
cooking my summer foods, all that good stuff,
and guess what?
We can use impossible sausages, impossible brats.
I mean, it's gonna be a great summer for impossible foods.
Impossible beef is made from plants
and 19 grams of protein per serving,
and it's better for the planet.
And it's meat.
Plant meat. Correct. So if you're looking for something to grab for your grill,
grab some impossible beef. Summer of impossible. Start making meat history today.
Just head over to the meat aisle at your local grocery store, grab some impossible beef,
or patties, and get grilling. Okay, so then we go, we have, we're picking up where we left off last week, which is they're all having dinner and
They've gotten it out of Nick his big secret. Did he as a girlfriend?
Which of course he's only let people know because he wants to make it look like oh, I don't care that nobody's interested in me in the house
Yeah, I have a girlfriend anyway after he's tried to get with it He's been's interested in me in the house. Yeah. I have a girlfriend anyway. After he's tried to get with her,
he's been trying with every girl in the house.
Everyone, right?
And Bria's like, so you've been singing,
like, for how long?
Like, why don't you tell us?
Like, you slipped into Jordan's DMs,
Shanese's DMs, my DMs, like, damn Gina.
That's what she says.
And then, but that's what she tells us.
I should say, she doesn't say that to Nick, of course.
So they're like, how old is she? And he goes, um, you don't ask a lady her age and they're like, so you don't know her age and
press the, they're like, no, he knows. He just doesn't want to tell you. So is it older or is it younger? And of course,
it's younger. Always younger. Of course, this is by the way, this is the person who
younger. Always. Younger. Of course, this is by the way, this is the person who comes back after summer break
to middle school or high school as like, yeah, I have a girlfriend, I met her in summer
camp. Like that's what this is, right? And she's older. You guys don't know her because
she's in high school. She knows things. Yeah. She's in college. She's in major. She's
a theater major. She's great, she's so hot.
All the guys in college won her,
but she decided to date me at high school student.
Oh yeah.
So he's like, my girlfriend,
Tasia's a beautiful woman.
We met New York and she's very private.
We don't post on Instagram,
we're any, oh, okay.
Oh, okay.
A girlfriend who doesn't use Instagram, really?
They're private, you know, there are how much
When you're a celebrity couple in the future like you have to start the privacy early
Yeah, I don't believe this for one second. Oh my girlfriend. My girlfriend who just doesn't like so shall
I'm sorry. I've never heard of that person
My hello is 2023 and you're girlfriend all over the place
Yeah, who doesn't like social but it's cool with you going on a reality show.
That makes sense.
Yes.
And also, she's still going to be your girlfriend when she sees all these DMs that you've
sent everybody else on TV.
Okay.
Now, I said the word, tajda, which, so I don't want to see the little mermaid this week.
And first of all, I cried so much in that movie. I really do want to see the little mermaid this week and First of all I cried so much in that movie
I really do need to get checked I need to come get a checkup because every time people start singing and dancing
I don't know I just start crying, okay, so great movie everybody go see it amazing the girl who played Ariel
I can't like amazing
But that's not what I want to talk about.
I walked into the movie theater.
The first preview they played, I started sobbing.
So I think this is what I know it's what I know it's.
I saw it and I started literally walking and sobbing.
Okay, it was the color purple, the musical.
Now I love the color purple, the movie.
It's always been one of my favorites.
Never sobbed harder in a movie.
But the musical, oh my god, they're making,
I didn't know they were making a movie out of
the musical, okay? And I was like, this sounds like this looks so good and then all my favorite lines
are coming on the screen, so I start getting, because you know, it's a musical. So I start getting like,
and then I hear, take fucking fan page ofial is in the movie.
Okay.
Squirting started out of my eyes.
I literally fell all over my pocket.
I cannot believe Fantasia's in that movie.
Oprah is the nicest boss because Fantasia got in trouble
on Broadway because she was never showing up.
I'm just like, she was just like,
I'm sick for five weeks.
And they're like, you can't do that.
And Oprah even told her, I saw an interview. Oprah's uh, you can't do that. And Oprah even told her, I saw an interview.
Oprah's like, you can't do that.
I give you a chance.
And I love that Fantasia is back.
And Oprah's like, you know what?
There's still nobody like Tasia.
And then they show our older, you know,
because in that movie, it's an epic.
So you seem to go from young to old.
Fell on the floor dead.
Okay, thanks.
Thanks for letting me go out about that.
Well, I'm excited for that one. I do plan to watch the original OG color purple before then. Because I know I'm gonna see this one. I know it. I love that one song. What's that one song? It's like
I am free. Was that a funeral? Right Well, right now, I'm thinking of his her American idol song.
I believe.
Fa, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la,
Fa, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la,
Fa, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la,
Oh yeah.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,
Fa, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la,
Fa, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la,
Fa, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la,
Fa, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la,
Fa, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la this past week, probably because the trailer came out. So it's been a lot of Fantasia in this household over the past two years.
So it's been Fantasia time over here.
Like this is a big Fantasia fantasy happening years.
I love Fantasia.
I forgot how much I loved Fantasia
until I was sobbing in that theater.
And by the way, I went with my niece and my sister
who don't ever go to anything that you want
to feel things around them.
They were just sitting there like this,
the whole movie, the whole every preview.
They're like, they're like,
it's like, seriously, you guys are such a waste.
I'm crying and I look over and they're just like annoyed.
They're just like annoyed by feeling and fun.
So whatever, use you.
Okay, let's go back and start.
Sorry for that detour about.
Some people, no, that was,
it always make a detour for a Fantasia Burino.
Okay, and the Little Mermaid.
They both deserve that. What a time to be alive. They both deserve that. What a time to be alive.
We're very lucky.
What a time to be alive.
So now it's the morning on Winter House,
I mean, Summer House, Martha's Vineyard,
and Jasmine and Silas are hugging and kissing,
and Jasmine is complaining that they haven't been cuddling
lately in the past, I guess, 48 hours on this TV show.
So then-
And just so you've's just crazy, okay?
You need to cut, why don't you not complain
about that, not getting touched enough?
Okay, you're touching cleaning, too.
A little coat of pendant.
You need to dry off.
You know what I mean?
That's why you're not,
you just need time to dry off.
So I mean, my feed broke up there a little bit. So I'm sorry if I talked
over you on the recording because I continue talking while you were frozen. Oh my God.
Welcome to how I do this show every day.
So. Carmen. Well, Alex, so they're going to be the guys are going to be working out today
on the grass. Every time they work out on the grass, by the way, I'm always like, ticks.
You guys are gonna get ticks.
Ticks, check for ticks.
Check for ticks.
Check for ticks.
So I'm gonna check for ticks please.
Because on those little islands,
those like Dan Tuckett and Dan Tuckett and Martin
Vineyard, the ticks are real.
I mean, they're like there.
So just wanna point out everyone,
if anyone is concerned that no one's looking out
for their ticks, I'm looking out for their ticks, guys.
Yeah.
At the top of it.
And Seneis has to go home, which sucks, because I really like her.
I know.
I have to go home, which really sucks, because I really have to prove myself to my new
sales job.
I'm just selling a hook up with anyone this week and maybe not to be going to my life girls.
And by going home for some mean, the bushes outside that
actor's house and by sales job, I'm selling myself to him.
So anyway, I see you guys on Friday with an update.
So Preston comes in and the girls are all going to go take a
mimosa walk while the guys work out.
So of course, he wants to do that.
And the guys are like, no, you're coming to work out with us.
And Silas is that friend you just don't want,
I think in general.
I don't know, has anybody seen this show
and been like, oh my god, Silas,
that seems like a fun friend.
Yeah, literally no one.
There's nothing fun about Silas.
First of all, it all goes back to him
playing out two computer monitors
and playing them on the dining room table
in the middle of the most social room of the house and then demanding people being quiet.
Like, that's just not a fun person.
Yeah.
And then he's the one when you're working out that he has to lead the workout.
Because he's like the most worked out.
So, well, I guess he's not.
He's like a mirror still.
There.
But he's like, I'm going to lead the workout, okay?
Because I'm in the military.
So, I'm in like the... and also the, what's the local,
he's in the natural, he's in the reserves, right?
I don't know why it matters.
I'm just trying to get my lingo, my lingo, right?
But he's like, I'm in the reserves.
So I will be leading the workout today.
Okay.
Guess what, you're not gonna reserve.
Your energy, you're gonna expend it right now,
Mr. Gaper, so wanting to go for a Mimosa walk,
bend over, bend over.
They do.
Yeah, so Preston is, they're doing like a boot camp thing.
Well, the ladies again, they're going on their walk,
which I thought was gonna be a little bit more exciting
than I guess walking down the driveway
and then watching Milo going,
like going missing on the driveway,
Milo goes off into the woods
and starts licking random poop in the woods.
So this is Milo everyone.
Now I'm not saying that Milo has to be.
I don't do it. God.
I know this is like part of the dog thing.
I'm just saying that Milo,
I feel like Milo really got in there with the poop.
I feel like that's just like, I'm just saying Milo is not a great dog.
I still think he's not a good dog.
You're still standing by your Milo sex.
Well, let me tell you, dogs love poop, okay?
And I don't know what it is about poop, but God, they love it.
I mean, I've never seen Puella get more excited.
And then what happens?
They eat poop and then they barf it all over your house.
So it looks like they pooped, but it's not poop.
It's barf poop, it's poop barf.
And it's disgusting and I don't really understand it,
but God, I love when he kisses my face too.
So that's what makes it even worse.
Is there such a thing as red eye, but for the lips?
He doesn't kiss my lip.
He can, no way.
I know what dogs do.
There's no way he can only kiss me like right here.
Top of the cheekbones, occasional. If he's been very good, he can, no way, I know what dogs do. There's no way he can only kiss me like right here, top of the cheekbones, occasional.
If he's been very good, he can give me
a couple of nose kisses.
Otherwise, no, hugs on me.
I have a question actually, as a dog owner.
My instincts would say that,
I looked like they were walking down a long driveway,
but potentially a row, but it looked like
it was just their driveway.
That's not a leash time, but potentially a road, but it looked like it was just their driveway. That's not a leash time, right?
Like you don't have to put on a leash for your dog
for doing something like that, right?
You were wondering, was it disrespectful
that she did not have the dog on a leash,
or was that like normal?
I think it's normal.
I would say bad idea.
My dog doesn't listen to me.
So he will just run off and go try and
find a bear and start shit with it because he thinks he's a badass and then he would get killed
himself. Or he'd see, you know, another dog immediately go buy it because that's how my dog
is. So I personally would not suggest it, but I think it's okay when you're in the forest,
you know, go be amongst the things. Yeah. So yeah, I guess my feeling was like, hey, we're going on a walk.
Like they're on a walk and have to stop the whole walk to go find Milo because Milo went
missing because Milo went running into the woods and now you've got to go into the woods
and Milo's there with poop.
You got even more ticks, more ticks in those woods.
So I kind of feel like as a courtesy to the other people, I would keep Milo on a leash. That way the memosa walk could go uninterrupted.
Um, yeah, I don't. Bray, I'm just building a case. I'm in your, I don't, yeah, I don't,
I'm not super tired of building an anti Milo case. And I'm not going to necessarily build
an anti-breeah case because I, I've been like, veering anti-breeah for a while. This episode, I don't know where I land on Breeah
because I feel like she's right about certain things
but I feel like she's super wrong about other things.
So I really don't know where I'm gonna go.
So we're just gonna see.
But I just wanna load that up in case I need it
for later on in the episode for a while.
Well, I think in summer house tradition,
we've seen Kyle using outside so much to go to the bathroom
that we can't really be annoyed.
Like if you don't put Kyle on a leash,
you don't have to put my low on a leash.
And my low on a leash.
Okay, that's fair.
I think that's a great theory.
So that's where I'm gonna come from.
So we go back to the guys working out
and Silas is all bossy and Preston's like,
I'm done, okay, because he's not as in shape as everybody else.
Still pretty big and buff, so I mean, nothing to sniff at.
That's for sure.
But Silas is like, no, we're gonna hold each other accountable.
Hey, go fuck yourself.
You know what I don't want?
A friend holding me accountable.
I've got Janelle at Weight Watchers for that.
Okay, and guess what I don't hang out with.
Her, the Weight Watchers counselor, the WW counselor.
I'm hanging out with her.
I don't want your accountability.
Take that shit somewhere else.
What are you gonna show up to my house
and sit in the driveway with a speed camera thing
to make sure I'm not speeding
or not eating too many calories.
You're my friend, okay?
If you're gonna get anything, count the amount of money
it's gonna cost you to buy the pounder bag of M&M's
that I need to be happy.
That's all I need from you, fucker.
It was a dick move because he literally stopped
this entire faux boot camp and then was like,
hold on, hold on, hold on.
Preston, we got five more reps pressed in,
highlighting the prison had to stop.
So it's kind of like a shaming moment,
really like to stop everyone else.
We're honestly, anyone who's ever gone to a boot camp,
I did do a boot camp once a few months ago. I hated it, it's terrible. But who's ever gone to a boot camp, I did do a boot camp once a few months ago,
I hated it, it's terrible.
But anytime anyone's ever done a boot camp,
or anytime anyone does, like an exercise video,
or whatever, like the basic of the vibe is like,
you try your hardest if you have to stop,
no one's gonna call you out and shame you,
like you pick up them when you're ready to come back in.
And so it was so obnoxious that Silas did that.
And I thought it was actually not really, it's not what a real, like, group fitness leader would do.
You're funny. I don't know why I was really about myself. It's not what a real boot camp instructor
would do in your class pass. But it is what they would do in the army. Okay. Well guess what?
Which is where Silas is from and don't you forget about it. Okay. Well, that's what they would do in the army. Okay. Well guess what? Which is where Silas is from and don't you forget about it.
Okay.
Well guess what?
They're not in the army right now unless they're battling
a war against the Jigs in the grass.
So, Preston, as the whole, listen, that's not holding me accountable.
There's different body types.
There's different endurance levels.
Okay.
Bro, you don't have to explain shit to this person.
Okay, and I don't need a tumbler moment from you either about different body types or
anything else.
I don't need a speech about it.
This is what I need from you, Preston.
Go fuck yourself, Silas.
You fuck.
Go control with Jasmine.
Okay, you're not going to control me.
Yeah, exactly.
So he basically is like that.
He's like, I'm making an effort.
You want me to make an effort.
I made an effort.
I'm doing the best that I can do.
So now they're just like done.
And then Silas starts asking the guys how that felt
about last night's conversation about free drinks,
because that was the big fight with Jasmine.
And Nick is kind of like, well, I mean, honestly, like if someone gives you a free,
gives a girl a free drink
and the interest isn't reciprocated, like, who cares?
And so I was like, well, I care,
because this is my wife.
And even if she says I'm good,
like, is the guy now angry because like, you're good,
but then you shouldn't have taken the last drink.
I just love House Hiles, just does not give any,
like, the guy that gets angry irrationally is like,
that's fine. But like Jasmine is the one who has to be like, who has to adjust her behavior
for some awful dude.
Listen, guys are buying drinks just for the same reason that they put worms on strings
and dip them into the water because they're hoping that something will bite. Okay?
They don't get to go stick their penis in every fish they find just because they put a
worm in the water.
Okay?
Sometimes you go.
Sometimes you don't want to jump on your line and some of them aren't.
Silas, it bothers me because it makes it sound like, oh really?
Well, you're leading them on.
If a guy buys you a drink and you don't fuck him, well, that's just bad manners.
And if you're going gonna get assaulted after that,
well, maybe you should reconsider taking a free drink.
You know, it's not exactly a mentality.
And it's gross.
Deepid.
Silas is gross.
Yeah.
He's a gross person.
So they all talk about this.
Like, is he wrong?
Or is he, is he right?
And then Nick is now coming kind of to decide that I like,
because he's like, well listen,
if it gives you a piece of mind,
these women have been adults and friends
and knew each other as waitresses at the Playboy Club,
which I'm sure they had their share of like guys trying to hit on them, right?
Because that's really where a place where guys are in the company of gorgeous females
that they're paying to be around and think that they can go too far.
You know what I mean?
So he's like, I think they'll be fine.
They've taken care of themselves a long time before you got called back from reserve.
Yeah, and I think that what I'd like someone to say is maybe
Silas, the reason why you're so concerned about how these guys would react if
their free drink went like unrest-spiricated is because you're projecting
onto those guys how you would react, which is not well because you are terrible.
So then Nick launches into yet another thing about,
oh, his mom, his mom, it him who he is today,
and he's fashionable because his mom,
it's like the fifth time he's like mentioned this whole thing,
like we get it, your mom's great.
So a mere asks Nick how his new girlfriend
would handle a situation like that, and then silence.
I'll say you would silence.
You wouldn't handle it.
She wouldn't post about it on Instagram.
That's right.
She doesn't do such.
No, she needs privacy.
Very private person.
Okay.
So then this is a first silence has heard of this new girlfriend.
So he's like, what?
So then we go to the ladies and they're talking about this news that Nick has a girlfriend.
And Jasmine's like, wait a minute, since when is this?
And she tells us, yeah, Nick's being the wrong kind of Nick.
He's being more like Nick Cannon here.
Okay.
And they're like, but then why was he hitting on all of us?
And Shanese's theory is out.
Who is just waiting to see if Jordan and I were in
persistent in them, both of them. Like, we're like in person,
but then we're not interested in them. And then like,
you can see we're not going for them. So then I think
that's what he was doing. Cause like, I mean, I saw from
his bedroom window like, like, like, don, like, I don't know
what that is.
I'm the way with I've slept under Nick's bedroom window several nights in a row and as far as I can tell,
he is so slimy.
That is what I've been saying.
Thank you for helping me.
I was like, what does that know me?
It means that she knows Nick so well because she's been standing outside this window.
God, I ruined my own.
No, it's what the hell I quit.
No, no, no.
There's still plenty more stuff.
So, Bria's basically like, where's your girlfriend
when you said you were gonna propose to Shanese, huh?
So then we go back to a mirror, he's talking to Nick
and he's like, so do you allow your girlfriend,
Tasia to flirt?
Yeah, I mean, look, like if you have an attractive woman, you accept smoke. So like in the case of Tasia to flirt. Yeah, I mean, look, like if you have an attractive woman,
you accept smoke.
So like in the case of Tasia,
I mean, I'm not saying she's a supermodel,
but I am saying she did walk in 12 different
Victoria's Secret shows and one in Oscar.
So that's all I'm saying about Tasia.
Very private person can't tell you anything more about her.
She's real, she's a real person.
So Sunni's leads the house, which I'm upset about. private person can't tell you anything more about her. She's real. She's a real person.
So Sunni's leads the house, which I'm upset about.
And then Briya calls Simon, because Briya calls Simon every five minutes.
And it's disturbing.
Like the amount of times that Briya calls Simon bothers me.
And you know what else bothers me?
I guess it's the time change I'm answering my, the time difference I'm answering my own question. Is Simon always in bed or is he always getting like, is he always about,
is he, has he always been just arrested where he's getting his, what do they call that
your mug shot taken? Because it's always just this much of his head and he's always up against
a white background. It's so weird. It's never like, hey, it's me.
Look at me.
It's Simon out on bike ride right now.
How's everything going my love?
Or like five minutes later.
Oh, it's me.
Now I'm in the grocery store.
Hello, love.
It's always in front of that white background
and it's very close up and up against something.
Yeah, does he leave his house?
Has he ever loved his house?
He's always in the mug shot line. That's what I'm gonna say. I'm Michael Patrick King, host of the official Max Companion podcast, and just like that, the writers room.
Each episode members of the writers room and I unpacked moments from season two,
sharing juicy details you can only hear from us.
Stream and just like that season two,
starting June 22nd on Max,
and listen to end just like that,
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All right, Crappens, commercial.
So, Jordan and Alex are gonna go flirt
by blowing up a floaty together, which is very
summer house.
I'm going to try out this new flirtation by blowing up a floaty with somebody.
Let's see how he handles that.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And then Jordan's like, then Alex is like, so I don't.
Alex bothers me because I really feel like he has,
he's putting on this facade that we talked about
a million times of him being this like,
thoughtful, introspective person,
but I just see him as a fuck boy.
And like his, his like, 30 banter is, he just negs.
He negs really hard. And he's kind of like an asshole about, he's like, he goes, I feel like you're like, 30 banter is, he just negs. He negs really hard.
And he's kind of like an asshole about it.
He's like, he goes, I feel like you're like,
really mean to me.
Like your jokes are just kind of like mean, you know?
And Jordan's like, but like, when have I started the joke first?
He goes, you came from my bucket hat.
She's like, well, your bucket hat looked dusty.
I can't be blamed.
And he's like smiling and as flirty.
But you know, he's like literally bothered
that she said something disparaging about his bucket hat.
And that's the thing.
I can't stand this person's all about meditation
and all about like intention,
making intentions and affirmations.
And yet his ego is so fragile that if his bucket hat
is like just in some sort of way,
he's got a passive aggressively take it out and flirting.
They're just trying to like have this this energy that's just not
translating very well. Like they're blowing it up and she just put that in the
hole and he's like, Oh yeah, I think I know how to insert. Oh, stop now. She's
oh my god, you're horny. It's really that was mean. You're so mean to me. My
kids are born. And of course, Jordan is like, I'm just so hot. I don't get it.
She's like, I just don't hot, I don't get it.
She's like, I just don't know what he's thinking or like what his intentions are. I mean,
is he making sexual jokes because of playboy or whatever, or is that really how he sees me?
What's going on? I like to have no idea. You guys are like at a fuck house in the summer on vacation
in bikinis and shirtless. Okay. Blowing up a floaty. Like, what do you, what do you think you're hired on this show to do?
You're here to fuck each other, okay?
I'm sorry if nobody told you that in the job description,
but I'm telling you now,
they don't hire me for a reason, okay?
They hire you, cause you're hot.
Go fuck somebody, both of you.
Get a fuck, go fuck a potato.
So then, more beer pong.
Get a mashed potato and fuck now.
This show is about fucking a mashed potato. It would be a more beer pong. Get a mashed potato on fuck now. If this show was about
fucking a mashed potato, I'd be a star of it. Okay. Hey, little hassle, dick. More like
hassle, fuck. So, that's a bad potato. So do I call it? That's a bad'm talking about. That's what I'm talking about.
Nick wants to talk to Silas. He tells Silas that he thinks that sometimes Silas
comes across managing every situation.
He's like, let me ask you a question.
I'll give him an observation.
In regards to relationship with Jasmine,
do you think you're controlling?
Silas is like, well, it may seem sometimes
that I'm trying to control everything,
but it's really out of just like planning
and making sure everything goes right.
Planning, making sure everything goes right with your plan,
that's controlling.
That's controlling.
Yeah, that's just like a, you're re-wording
what controlling means.
Like, congratulations.
You've redefined something in the same way
it was already defined, just with different words. And so things. So Jordan and Alex come out with their floaties,
which I was so proud of them. I'm like, wow, this cast really can get things done. They've got floaties
that are blown up. So they go out and next like, you know, but you know, if you come, if you become over-controlling, then you run the risk of Jasmine losing those skills,
you know, to, she's going to need to like do some things on her own to respect herself.
You don't want her to just become stupid because, you know, women really need to keep
that independence muscle worked out because her natural state is to rely on a man for everything.
So if you know, just let her work out her, just make her think that she's in charge of
something.
Say, what do you want to do today?
You want to go to the store and buy me some groceries?
That's great.
Good for you.
Go alone.
I mean, let the woman be independent.
It's like, wow, what's the conversation between these two?
Here's what you got to do.
Okay. Watch old enough on Netflix.
Okay, and get some inspiration and say,
Jasmine, here's a fish.
I'm putting it into a lunch box.
Can you take it down the hill to your father?
And just see what she can do with it.
Just see if she can do it.
She'll be safe.
Oh, Silas tells us.
I'm not taking marriage advice from a guy with a secret girlfriend,
but he tells him, he's like, well,
Jasmine's very independent and she's in charge of our schedule.
You know, my position is basically backstop.
She tries to go back and I say stop.
I'm also the front stop if she goes front and I say stop.
I just, I'm the stop.
I'm the stop. That's my position, the stop.
Well, to be fair, I think Nick was,
well, he was really trying to say it was like,
hey, you're so controlling, you're so concerned
about how she's gonna react when she gets,
goes out to a club, but you're so controlling
that she's gonna lose.
She may become codependent with you
and may not actually know how to,
she may lose some skills and how to fend for herself in those spaces.
So basically stop doing that.
So that way, like, you know, you're going to create a situation where she's
helpless, she's not going whatever.
So he was like trying to say that Silas, of course, doesn't want you any
of it. He's like, I'm not going to take advice from someone who's a
secret girlfriend, which fair, fair, but I think Nick is more right than
Silas' right.
So I think it's very funny to men talking about and controlling. You don't want her to forget,
you know, you don't want her to forget those skills. What if she forgets how to use doors and windows?
So then we go to Preston and Brea eating mac and cheese,
which I love because Preston has just gotten.
This is how Preston rebels against that workout with Silas
and being fat shamed.
He runs to the mac and cheese, which I totally get.
There's been like a cauldron of mac and cheese
every episode I feel like, and I am so jealous.
It's like every episode they have.
At some point someone takes it out of the oven.
I'm like, please save some of me.
It's constantly going.
And then a mere just passes by sweeping up something.
But I know.
So cute.
Oh, also, we follow a mere now on social because I mean,
he's hot.
That's all we really require.
And he is a real estate guy, and he does those videos.
He's like, well, let me tell you.
Hey, guys, what kind of weekend are you having?
I'll tell you what kind of weekend I'm having.
Two bedroom one bath for under $2 million in Austin, Texas.
That's what kind of weekend I'm having.
Let's take a look.
See, sadly.
Yeah, he like flirts.
He's like, he's like flirting for a listing.
Oh, I love it.
So it's great.
I'm like, yes
Take all the one million and then I remember like I don't have millions and my god damn it
I'm never gonna meet this person
Let me tell you something when the two judgy girls do their march madness next year
Please remember a mirror because I think he should win the whole thing
So everyone I'm putting in the lot. I'm starting the campaign now vote early vote often for a mirror
Yeah, so they are talking a breeze like well, you know I'm putting in the lot. I'm starting the campaign now, vote early, vote often for a year. Yeah.
So they are talking,
Bria's like, you know,
like when Simon cries,
I,
Oh no, they're talking about Nick having a girlfriend.
Bria's like,
this scene was a little,
I felt like something was edited out of the scene
because she's like,
she's like,
God, it was so weird that Nick suddenly has a girlfriend,
you know,
because like when Simon comes, I know you guys
are all gonna drill Simon.
So I guess you're sort of saying maybe it's unfair
that Tasia doesn't come or that Nick was being grilled
and he's being secret and you guys are gonna
drill Simon, so we should maybe be able to
drill Nick something like that.
And then Briea says, because Amir looks at me
like a sister,
and I need that, and do you feel in any way
that I lacked on giving that same respect to you?
And I'm like, have there been elements
of this conversation that have been edited out by accident,
because I don't know how we got to this point,
but sure, okay, we'll talk about this instead now.
Yeah, well, he talks about his family
and how they're so important to him and Preston's like,
but you're a brother to me.
You're like a brother to me.
And I know where you are at this moment.
And I'm here's like, well, thanks.
Thanks.
I mean, they're having this really meaningful conversation
through mac and cheese, which I found pretty powerful
because literally I think I should have started it.
He's like hot crying, you're like, oh, me, or...
I think it was crying.
I know hot crying and he just finished sweeping too.
I think the sweeping really took him to another level.
You know, last week was the latter,
but the sweep was the sweeping, you know.
Pretty cute.
So now we're gonna go play some beer pong
and Jordan's still floating around the pool
and all that stuff.
And so Nick's just staring at her being a total perv, you know. And she's like, so are you gonna get in or just gonna sit there and stare at me?
Okay. And are you staring at me because you really think I'm a hotter? Is it because of the
playboy thing? And you think that you're just allowed to stare at me all day? Because I was a
playboy. So. And he's like, uh, don't put me on blast. I can't, I can't swim. And she's like, don't put me on blast. I can't swim. And she's like, well, there's a person here who could teach you to swim.
And that's me.
So get on a floaty.
And I'll show you how to swim.
And then he falls in.
And they do an instant replay.
And it's like, wow, the music of Nick going into pool.
Yeah, I know I'll do enough.
I actually feel some weird sexual tension with Nick and Jordan.
Because it feels like he's too dorky and insecure for her.
She's so beautiful and she's like, you know, she's, but then it feels like she doesn't really
care about a mirror as much as a mirror is flirting.
And I don't know, I feel like Jordan and Nick are going to be at against all Oz couple,
but I don't feel, but I feel like, I feel like Nick can't. I don't know if Nick can
rise to the occasion, but I don't, I don't particularly like Nick that much, but I kind of want the
weird, like, hot girl nerdy guy thing to happen. I don't know. But either way, Briya goes upstairs and
guess what she does? No, she does not do a crossword or read a book.
She faced Simon.
FaceTime Simon.
No.
So wordle on that phone.
Okay.
Oh, wordle.
Guarantee there's not a wordle on that phone.
Yes, she's calling Simon.
Okay.
Who again is up against a little white square
with his head up against something
like he's being held at gunpoint.
I don't know if this is a hostage of it.
I really don't know what's going on with Mick at this point.
So they don't talk about anything.
She's just like, they're gonna drill you.
By the way, we just ate some mac and cheese.
It was delicious.
So then Jasmine gets on group text,
ask everybody what she wants to order,
and now it's dinner time.
Yeah, and they're all sitting around,
and I'm here talking about it tomorrow.
They're gonna go fishing,
and he's gonna cook the fish afterwards.
And Jasmine announces that her friend,
Summer's gonna join, as well as her friend Jason.
And then Jasmine's like,
now by the way, Nick, I wanna ask you about your girlfriend,
because like, I came in here ready for people
to get to know each other,
and I was thinking, I'm gonna be your wingman,
and then I'm gonna like back you up and everything,
and now I'm hearing that you're
in a relationship, so now I feel like I have to support
you differently, because now you're in a relationship,
and I have to support.
Here's the thing, I pitched to Bravo
that I was going to be a matchmaker.
Have you ever seen Emma?
Clueless? Hello.
I guess I was just kind of fucking it up for me.
Yeah, I think she is doing that too.
I think she's like, listen, this shows about fucking.
I came here trying to get everybody to fuck,
and now everybody's telling me they're not gonna fuck.
Okay, you've got Briya saying she has a boyfriend
and I need to respect her relationship.
Now, you're not gonna fuck to you?
Well, this is not gonna fuck.
We just all not gonna fuck.
I'm only one fucking and I'm married.
I shouldn't be fucking this much.
Why does she care about who's fucking?
Stop caring, okay, it's weird.
It's weird at this point that you're literally
following everybody around, trying to make them boom.
Just calm the fuck down, lady.
Because she wants to drag people into her circle of hell.
And also, when she match makes,
when she match makes, she gets to remind people
that she's already in a relationship
that's like wonderful and great.
And so if she is robbed of that opportunity,
she just, she has no control over it
and she can't tell what their other relationship is gonna be.
I mean, imagine if you're Yenta,
I'm like, guess what I heard the other day, all right?
I heard that Shlomo was looking at Moisha in a way
that was on tour and everyone's like, yeah, we already know.
Oh, well, I'm Yenta, you're supposed to hear it from me.
Yeah, but we know.
Okay, well, I'll go home.
You know, it's like, what does Yenta do
when everyone's already pre-yented?
Yeah, well, we don't need a Yenta, okay.
It shouldn't, people that hot and young
should not be forced to be attractive, okay?
They're gonna fuck, they're hot and they're young.
That's like literally what they do.
Don't let them, you don't need to lead them to the fucking.
Okay, you do not need to lead a hot person to fucking.
They naturally find it.
It's nature.
So, sorry for also introducing a potentially gay rumor
between Shlomo and Moisha.
That was not, that was not proper.
So then they start trying to get on Nick about having a girlfriend, I guess, like a confrontation
with Nick and he's like, I don't care.
This is probably lie anyway.
So I'm not going to fight about it.
And so then Jordan was like, well, I guess the thing is I thought you were interested in
Shanese.
And I'm just saying you loved her smile.
And then they are like,
well, and didn't you say that,
like, hey, that's my wife.
Like, that's my wife.
And he's like, no, no.
I think the messages I sent were pretty friendly.
I don't think they were,
I don't think they were avert or anything like that.
And then of course they put the messages on the screen
and it's like, special, you're special.
I'm just gonna say that.
They can go to meeting you.
Yes, special, dot, dot, dot. Yeah, the dot, dot, dot is harassment. I'm looking forward to meeting you. Yes, special dot, dot, dot.
Yeah, the dot, dot, dot is harassment.
I'm still saying it, but that is a harassmental lip sees.
But he's obviously being like, yeah, hotty, you know,
looking forward to meeting you Thursday.
Fire, sun, fire, sun.
Have you always been fine?
Is the next message?
No, no.
They're totally innocent, guys.
If you've always been so fine, nothing over.
Pretty chill.
Yeah, nothing over.
It's totally how I am when I go to home.
When it's my turn at the home goods to check out, I'm like, oh, hey, have you always been
so fine?
Okay.
So by the way, is there a price tag?
Could you look up the price on this little fake plant?
Great.
So, the producer asked Nick, like, hey, so you say this whole wife comment, never have,
and he goes, I never said that.
Like, there's no one to corroborate my story.
I mean, no, like, you can't corroborate that, although it's funny that no one can corroborate
Tasia, but that's okay that they can't corroborate her.
That's okay.
But in this case, it's throw it out the window, throw it out the story because there's
no one to corroborate it.
And the producers, like, but everyone said it happened and I'm hearing in the DMs that
Jasmine has had some type of vent at her house and then we cut to Jasmine.
And she goes, at my house, you said that.
And he's like, I did not say it.
I did not.
And then Jasmine's like, well, before this, every time Nick and I talk, he would say
that Shinesis is his wife and he's getting for Genese.
And I mean, he's just a broken record about it.
Now, he doesn't care.
I don't buy it.
And then Alex is like, did I know that Nick had a girlfriend?
I mean, that's like asking, did you know that John Legend's my cousin?
Of course, you knew about it, okay? I'm basically John legend myself.
And did I know how serious he was
about the relationship?
I don't think I really did.
And had I been really clear about that?
I probably would have been more present of mine
to have a real conversation with him about it.
Because I was quite confused myself.
I have to be, no, you were too self-involved
to pay attention to this.
You didn't even care.
Let's be honest.
So then they keep questioning about this girl, him about this girl.
And he's like, well, we've known each other since 2016.
And you know, there was just a spark.
Oh, really?
You've known each other since, you've known each other for eight years.
And then suddenly when Owen and this house wants to get into your fans, you have a spark
with her.
You're so foolish.
And the crickets,, and the crickets,
oh, the crickets, they're overwhelming, right?
So then Preston's like, so does it feel like
no photographic evidence, no photographic evidence
for eight years.
Just a private man.
Very, very private, yeah.
Very, very, very, continue.
So Preston's like, yeah, how does it feel right now?
Like, daggers are coming and they start
like making light of it.
So then after dinner, Preston goes to bed
literally eating raccochees.
I mean, what the hell, this person is perfect.
And how does he still look like that
with all that raccochees going?
Eating in the dark, that is, how does he look so hot?
Like he's still so big and muscular.
Can't start a fire, can't start a fire without a spark.
This guns for hire, for just eating in the dark.
So, Brea, so Brea text Jasmine, she goes,
so excited to see Simon, they're texting in bed,
like from bedroom to bedroom.
And Jasmine's like, can't wait to meet him.
And Bria's like, I can't believe I get to spend
a whole week with him, which is her way of saying,
remember you said that because if you don't,
I'm gonna mention, remember that night
at the bowling alley about 10 more times.
She knows something's brewing, right?
You can just tell cause she's texting her
to get it all on text that this is okayed, right?
So she knows something's brewing.
And then meanwhile, Silas and Jasmine are reading these texts and Silas is like, we didn't okay that did we?
And she's like, no, and he goes, well, we're gonna challenge it. And she goes, okay, well, what is your
challenge sound like? Okay. Does your challenge sound like Nick? You don't have a girlfriend. Would you please
fuck somebody right now so my wife can sleep better?
So how it's going to sound?
Because I'm totally imperative that's that.
Okay.
And he goes, no, this is what we say.
First of all, your curfew is at 930, so I hope Simon understands that.
Second of all, the folks who are here are the ones that have been invited to stay the entire
time and we've been gracious to allow you to bring your dog.
And it's a bit much to ask us to then allow you
to bring your boyfriend to live in the house. Equal access is everybody else. We would have to make that
a hard and fast rule. I think you just say he doesn't get to stay here for a full week. He's not a full
time guest member. He gets three days like he gets to do whatever the fuck she wants. You two get to
be a couple. You're not the boss of everybody, okay? That's not cool.
And I feel like everybody should be able to have a girlfriend
if they want.
Also, you just kicked out two people,
you kicked out Mariah and Phil,
and one is being replaced by the flight attendant,
and there's still more room.
Oh, I guess they're both replaced.
Well, I do agree that they've already invited somebody else.
They keep on inviting more of their friends,
but then it is fucked up that Ria can't invite her boyfriend,
but that being said,
because I'm a little split on this,
because I'm of two minds.
I agree that like, oh, so Silas and Jasmine
can keep inviting their friends.
I know they're the quote-unquote hosts,
but like, why can't other people invite their friends?
But also, why did Rria invite her boyfriend to come
in the middle of this vacation?
Like, I would never do that.
If I went on a group vacation,
to go on vacation with her in America at Martha's Vineyard,
I think she was excited to do that.
Like, I'm going on this TV show, you're my boyfriend,
come be on the TV show for half the time is my boyfriend.
Yeah, I don't, I think if I'm on a group trip,
if I'm on a group trip and like I'm with like,
just like a set group and then someone's like,
oh by the way, I'm gonna bring in like this other person
for half the time, for a full half the time.
I don't know, I don't think I would like that to be honest.
Yeah, I don't know if I would like it,
but I'm team Bria because she's against
Silas and Jasmine and their bossy and their assholes and she's already told them this
and now they're going to pretend they never heard it, which is like I'm not going to be on their side.
They're horrible and fat shaming and fuck shaming, okay, and chastity shaming.
So I'm not on their side, okay? Have you seen Jasmine eating macaroni and cheese in bed?
No, so you don't win this fight, Jasmine, okay?
I don't know. Yeah, I think that like Jasmine and Salis are, so you don't win this fight, Jasmine. Okay.
I don't know.
Yeah, I think that like Jasmine and Salazar
are definitely controlling, but I think this is,
I don't know, I just, a whole week to have someone
just like interrupt the house.
I don't know, it's weird.
Intervalent.
What are they doing?
They're literally sitting by the pool all week.
You know what I think that what they really should do
is that he comes in for the last three days.
If you need to spend a week in America,
he comes in for the last three days. If you need to spend a week in America, he comes in for the last three days and then the two of them go off and then they
spend the last four of his days of his vacation, like often wherever they go to
New York, Boston, who knows?
That is my answer to this.
Okay.
So then we go to, I mean, honestly, like, I don't care.
Important.
Like, yeah, I just don't care.
I would, I would, I would argue with you, but it would just be like, for fun. You know what I mean, honestly, I don't care. I don't care. Yeah, I just don't care. I would argue with you, but it would just be like,
for fun, you know what I mean?
I'm gonna argue with Ben just so I can say,
I argued with him, but I really,
I'm on your slow sticks.
Yeah, I'm on your side just to end it.
But like, it's a low stick argument.
And I reserve the right to change my mind.
That guy should leave.
He should leave.
He should only be, well also it depends on how hot he is.
If he, we don't know like, is he hot?
Does he take out the trash?
Does he clean up, you know, the kitchen?
There is certain things that are useful, you know,
is he gonna be in a mirror
who's like constantly sweeping and pulling out ladders
to do things?
Is he gonna be a helpful addition?
Or is he gonna, is he gonna bring a dog?
Cause you really don't know if this guy could bring
like a pack of dogs and be like,
this is my car, they take me on sled down the street.
You know, like we don't know what he's gonna do.
He could be like 10 times worse than Briya
and just bring a dog and an elephant.
You know, no, no, I don't know yet.
Yeah, we'll find out, I guess.
So anyway, now Silas and Jasmine have sex.
And it's-
And poundally.
Very poundally, it's like pound-
pound- pound-
pound-
pound-
pound-
pound- pound- pound-
pound-
pound-
pound- pound- pound-
pound-
pound-
pound- pound- pound- pound- pound-
pound-
pound- pound- pound- pound-
pound- pound- pound- pound- pound- pound- pound- pound-
pound- pound- pound- pound-
pound-
pound- pound- pound-
pound- pound- pound- pound- pound- pound- pound- pound- pound- pound- pound- pound- pound- pound- pound- pound- pound- pound- pound- pound- pound- pound- pound- pound- pound- pound- pound- pound- pound- pound- pound- pound- pound- pound- pound- pound- pound- pound- pound- pound- pound- pound- pound- pound- pound-
pound-
pound- pound- pound- pound- pound- pound- pound- pound- pound-
pound- pound- pound- pound- sex, like, go in the dark. So then we go to, it's the next day, they're going to go fishing. This is Amir's day and he's planned a big fishing trip. So they're all excited. Guess
what, Brianna? She's like, hey, should we talk? So Jasmine's like, okay, just wanted to
confirm with you at Simon's coming. That's right, isn't it? Simon's coming. Whenever she
comes at you with that intense nod and smile, run. Okay. So she's like, yeah, he's coming. That's right, isn't it? Simon's coming. Whenever she comes at you with that intense nod and smile,
run.
Okay.
So she's like, yeah, he's coming Thursday.
And she's, oh, and it's official
that he's staying this whole time, is it?
It's official, really?
Really?
Really?
Brea's like, yeah, until the end.
Yeah, so yeah, so she's, he's basically like,
you guys cast the show and then I cast
someone to add on to the show if that's okay. And then.
And she reminds her, I did tell you this at the bowling alley. Now again, now this is where
I'm climbing more to your side with Bria because Bria is a big fan of telling people what she's
going to do instead of saying, Hey, you're inviting me on this trip. Can I bring my dog?
instead of saying, hey, you're inviting me on this trip. Can I bring my dog?
Instead of just saying, I have a dog.
Or can I bring my boyfriend?
Instead of, I just brought my boyfriend.
I think she's from the school of,
it's easier to ask forgiveness than permission, you know?
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
So, yeah, basically, Jasmine's like, well, Jason and Summer come today. So it's kind of like,
he's staying like the original house folks are and I do want to bring it to the house because I'm
like trying, you know, to learn from last time that the issue that I would fill, who incidentally
was your friend too. That's so funny how that worked out. Wow, you already brought a horrific
person to this house.
Anyway, we'll just do a houseboat,
and it won't be on my shoulders.
We'll be on everyone else's, so yeah.
Yeah.
And the producers, like, but she did say it on camera,
didn't she, that she was gonna be bringing him
from Germany for a week, and she was, she never said
he was coming, and then we see a clip of her saying,
exactly that.
He's gonna come the last week, and Jasmine's saying,
we're so excited.
And then they repeated on slow motion motion just so we all get it
So
Then let's see by the way, there is a subtle difference
There is a subtle difference of if you say so and so's coming out the last week
That may imply they're coming out for a few days during the last week as opposed to they're coming out for a long week
So I'm going to give a little gonna give a little wiggle room on that point.
So then she calls, Brea calls Shanice to complain about it.
And she's like, I mean, what the hell?
What's going on, you know?
And then she tells her, oh, by the way,
Nick found out he told us the cameras were off,
which I guess is his way of being nice about it,
even though he doesn't realize there's like 50 cameras that are constantly on because we're living in
basically a bank of America.
But Nick had this conversation telling us he read that you're a stalker and Alex uncomfortable.
Alex, who did I say?
Nick.
Nick.
I'm sorry.
Yeah, and we see yesterday a clip of Alex telling one there's articles out there, but how she's a stalker
And there's a restraining order against her. So being the thoughtful
Person I am. I'm not gonna give her the benefit of the doubt. She's a demon monster
Yeah, and Priya Priya is like, why are we gonna talk about you in your situation?
Like there's nothing to talk about here in shanese is Like, yeah, I mean, I've never been on vacation
where people have like deep conversations like that.
Like, when was the last time I was at Disneyland
when someone mentioned that I was a stalker?
What Mickey Mouse did, actually he did.
But it was mostly because I was hiding in his head.
It was like my head's heavy.
I was like curled up in a ball in there.
But I was like, oh, I just wanted to be with you the other day to kind of see what it was like. It was like my head's heavy. I was like curled up in a ball in there, but I was like, oh, I just just wanted to be with you today
and kind of see what it was like.
It was amazing.
Here's a big one.
Mickey Mouse has a big one.
Hold that, dude.
God, when Mickey Mouse was on Instagram,
oh, that was so good.
So they start talking about sex,
and Jimmy says, well, finally I had sex.
I had my monthly sex and Brea's like,
oh, yeah, I'm on mine too.
And she goes, no, not my period.
My son, I was having sex.
So and she's like, so what about Simon?
Are people gonna be mad about Simon?
Because like, I mean, you can't compare him to Phil.
Like, sorry, I mean, Simon's different.
I mean, it's not the same as Val.
Shinesa's like, hello, I'm trying to tell you,
I had sex with someone last night
and you're not even asking me about it.
Because I agree, Simon should be here for the whole week.
So then we go to fishing, right?
And they, Alex, of course, is the first one to catch a fish.
And he's like, can we throw it back for the vegan?
The vegan wouldn't be on the fishing trip.
Okay.
The vegan wouldn't be touching that pole.
Stop faking, sir.
Yeah, yeah, just don't sit that, yes, exactly.
So, but I have to say, by the way, we've seen a lot of fishing trips on Bravo.
So, I think the, I would say the preeminent sport Umbravo that people are terrible at
is tennis.
Like, bad tennis Umbravo has been going on for, like, at least since 2009 since Jill Zarian
and Ramona played tennis on Real Housewives of New York.
We've seen a lot of bad tennis, but we also see a lot of terrible fishing.
We see a lot of people going out to go fishing and they get, like, a small guppy at best.
And that goes for even top chef episodes.
But let me say something, this crew,
they literally all got massive fish.
Everybody.
One, I mean, it was like a local carnival at church
where they're just like, well, they're here for Jesus
to just give everybody a surprise.
Literally everybody, they were just
well, Yanke and fish right out of that ocean.
So then they go home and they're trying to decide
between fried fish and grilled fish,
Dürr, fried fish.
Thank you.
And then we,
There's flowers.
Oh, don't forget, there's also giant flowers
on the doorstep because Simon has sent enormous flowers
from the Jasmine section.
I'm working on the house meeting
because I didn't think that I approved
a flower's being sent here and staying here
when nobody really invited me.
Like, what counter are the flowers gonna stay on?
Are they gonna take a vase?
Because I was not aware that an extra vase
was gonna be used for those flowers.
I was not aware that there'd be some
inter-couple flower giving
because as the married couple,
we were thinking that all flowers
would be approved by us before they actually enter the house.
So we meet the new girl, Summer.
She's a personal assistant and a screenwriter.
A screenwriter.
Wow.
I mean, the amount of scripts that are going to come out of this show, I'm so excited
for it. So Jasmine met her at Sundance.
And she's like, we bonded over the fact that we are writers.
And you know, I'm married.
And I'm assuming someday she'll be married to.
So I'm sure she was very impressed by that.
So we just sort of bonded.
She bonded to me and my marriage, basically.
So I love her, love summer.
She says Jasmine and Jordan interviewed me for a Playboy article, right?
Yes.
She said that because she's a screenwriter, I guess, to the interview to her. And so Jordan's
like, yeah, people think that Playboy is just as intense, but it's more than that, I wrote an article. I should my journalistic side. Okay, listen, I'm sorry to say this,
but journalists don't say I'm showing my journalistic side. Okay, they'll have to be that,
because you have to be really nice. I like to see, okay, sorry.
Wonderful play, but we'll ever let it go the other way around. Not having the centerfolds
writing articles, but having the journalist be centerfolds like.
Right.
Right.
April ish, the June 2000s 23 issue, everyone,
there's least all. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Then Katie Curic. Mm. Katie Curic, Hot Girl Summer.
So then we go to Marin Doued.
Everyone meeting her.
And she comes in in a headband
because she's been interviewed before.
So she's got a really thick headband,
like sorority girl headband.
But she's always wear these headbands.
And so they all start calling her Hillary Banks,
so I think it's really funny.
Yeah, and some people that know Hillary Banks was,
wasn't there someone who didn't know Hillary Banks was?
On this show, wasn't there someone who didn't know?
I don't know, doesn't matter.
Oh, the producer, it was the producer
that didn't know Hillary Banks was.
Oh yeah.
So then Silas is like tonight tonight we're gonna take it back
to college and doing a Toga party.
God, I love old Greece.
When women knew their place and didn't try to take
free drinks from men.
Yes, so it's gonna be the alphas of versus the capos,
I believe, and Jordan's like, oh, well, I feel a little
disloyal because I've got an Omega tattooed on me because she comes from a long line of
Omega's. And so she feels sort of weird about representing a different frat than like her
family, her family frat. So then some of me while I was talking about how she was in a
sorority and she was kicked out because she didn out because she just didn't care. She like wouldn't go to events
and she just wasn't falling in line
and she was in alpha fee.
And Jordan's like, well, how about this?
Why don't we, for this like competition that we're doing,
why don't we just have it like schools instead of like
fraternities, because like most of us
were not Greek anyway.
And so I was like, no, no.
The reason why we have to keep
at the name of the fraternities is
because we have to keep the integrity of it.
Integrity of what?
So is the party competition?
Look at that.
To be a team alpha, you have to be an alpha.
And that's all we're saying.
But I was alpha.
It was alpha fee.
And pressing goes, um, it's alpha fee alpha.
So I guess that means guys.
And so she's like, oh, so you're being sexist
So it's not about it's not about the actual house or whatever. It's about guys guys. It's only guys for
Turn it's for eternity. He's not so already so then
Silas stops and looks up and
Doesn't really say much but presents like it's just a fun way to have fun.
Like, can we just have a competition?
So then, I just love, I'm sorry to interrupt.
I love Silas pushing back on the idea
that he's controlling when he can't even give,
like, a millimeter on the stupid flip-up team name.
I also like that he's called sexist and racist
in one episode, and completely propped into controlling. Yeah. So then the new guy pulls up and he is a flight attendant. Now, I don't know how many
flight attendants you know, I know quite a few actually flight attendants are some messy, messy
bitches. Everywhere, men and women, I'm saying bitches, all of you are messy because you all have to put up
with more shit than anybody I've ever seen.
And I've seen people in some pretty shit jobs,
but man, the shit you guys put up with is a lot.
It's a lot.
You should all be given an award.
This is true.
And also, I love your sassiness
and how you don't take shit from anybody.
And I think that every
Reality show should have at least one flight attendant on it because you guys are messes and you are past the point giving any
Fucks
Yeah, this is true. So
So Jason this is Jason says that he and jazzed roommates in New York
But he says I'm a heterosexual man,
and sometimes men can't be intimidated by friendships
with men and women.
I'm like, Silas, I'm sure Silas was totally,
totally not concerned about this at all.
I'm sure it was like very, very chill
and was like, yeah, I love it.
I love that your straight male roommate,
who is very attractive is here in the house with you,
and you're like, friendly with him.
I'm totally chill about it.
Yeah, it's like, but I'm here to get to know him and appreciate him. Just the way that Jasmine appreciates him. Uh-huh. Okay.
So then guess what braids does. This is so fucking crazy. She pulls out an encyclopedia and starts learning just kidding. She calls Simon. I couldn't believe it. It was.
Just kidding. She calls Simon. I couldn't believe it. It was it was a crazy moment. So she calls Simon and she got the flowers. Oh, was yeah, was he out in the park? Was he out of his office?
You're not gonna believe this. He was head straight up against a wall with what's this much of his face showing?
Unbelievable.
So his second dad me have us the against that. Jocelyn, huh? And so, Brianna's like, Arbria's like,
yeah, well, you're coming from Germany. So that's fine. And
Jocelyn here is because she's giving a tour. And so she
hears all this. And she's, uh, guess I'll finish my tour. Bye.
Hi, Simon. Hi, Simon. Thanks for the flowers that weren't
invited.
Hi, we're going to figure out how to do that.
Okay, we're going to figure out how to keep those masks.
He's feeding.
And Brie is like, yeah, this is Simon.
He's coming from Germany.
It's a 13 hour flight, a 13 hour flight.
I'm like, if you're trying to impress the flight attendant,
and we're there a 13 hour flight, try it again,
because flight attend will fly across
the country back and forth in one day. I'll think they're jobs. So you're not going to,
you're not going to get any sympathy points from him, okay? Yeah. So then, um, let's see. So then
we go to a cooking downstairs. So now, Brea comes down to the kitchen where everyone else is cooking
and making an effort. And she criticizes the non-fresh lemon juice that is being used. And then she goes and
grabs a seasoning and just ports it all over the broccoli that has already been
seasoned. Okay, now this is where Briya, you know,
what Briya, I've tried to stay on your side a lot in the show. You just fucking
lost me. Yeah, First it's the dog.
Then it's the boyfriend that no one knew about.
Now you're just coming in when other people are cooking.
I haven't seen you do jack shit in this house.
But now that other people are doing it,
you're gonna come ruin their fucking broccoli.
Get the fuck outta here, Bria.
Okay?
Well, I, you know, she briefly won me over
when she was like, you gotta use fresh lemon juice.
Like, you gotta, like, you can't use it the bottle.
You can't do that.
You gotta use fresh lemon juice.
I was like, you know what, maybe Bri and I,
maybe I've misjudged Briya,
and then she took that entire thing of Larry's
and just dumped it on what was already apparently preseasoned
Larry's.
It was only worth it to watch a mere loses mind
because he was so cute.
We could, it had so much
Larry's on it already. Why?
But like, Brea, I think that she's just like really only thinks about herself.
And a house full of people that do this, but she sucks.
Yeah, I'm sorry.
So now she goes to take Silas outside for a talk.
Okay.
So she's like, so listen, when we went bowling,
I did tell you guys, he's gonna stay a week
because he has to travel and you guys said that was fine.
And he's like, you know, I just never wanna say,
I'm not worried about your concerns.
You know what I mean?
And I feel like that was the rest of the house.
What if they're concerned about it?
I feel like we should bring it to the house.
And she's like, well, I don't want everyone uncomfortable,
but you guys get to have each other and I don't get to have anybody.
And if he can't stay at length, then I feel like it has to do with race.
And is it going to come down to that? Yes, it is. That's what I'm saying.
It's because of race.
And before the raw... Uh-huh.
So before even the race thing, I think her logic here, you guys get to have each other
and I don't.
What the fuck is that about?
I'm sorry.
Okay, it's two weeks.
Can you chill out for two weeks?
And they literally are the hosts.
Like regardless of what you think about them, this is like they as a couple invited their
friends.
I mean, quote unquote, it's a couple invited their friends, I mean quote unquote,
it's a TV show, but like it's their house.
It's like what do you mean, like you need to have your boyfriend fly all the way to from
Germany to here because you cannot be by yourself in this household for like two weeks,
two simple weeks.
First, you bring your dog, then this codependent boyfriend, you're FaceTime the average you sex, he's sending you flowers, like I'm sorry, like this is, this is bullshit
right here.
Now in terms of the race thing, that's...
Well, a lot of it for me depends on what the setup is, because on summer house, the
regular, they make it sound like they all rent this house together, right?
That was the setup of that one.
Like we all naturally go to the summer every, it's normal for us to rent house with a bunch of people
So you can share the rent and you can afford these big mansions. That's the only way people on our salaries can live like this for the summer
Which is what makes it fun. So are they all paying for this house or it our Silas and Jasmine taking care of the house because if ever if
Bree is paying for her own portion then yes
She should be able to fuck somebody in her room while she wants to.
Just like everybody else on these shows gets to bring girlfriends and boyfriends and all
that other stuff over.
So I don't know why it's going to be different for her, but if she's not paying and they're
paying for everything, then I can see why they're being a little more controlling.
But just being the person to say, hey, does everybody want to go on vacation?
I don't think it gives you the right to boss everybody around the whole vacation.
You know?
I think that's probably true, but I think there is still some respect that's afforded
to people who are host who organize a trip.
I think if someone organizes something, and this is, again, it's Lucy Goosey because
it's a reality TV show, it's cast and everything, and we know this sort of just like the premise,
but theoretically in the real world.
If someone organizes a trip,
I think the proper thing is to acknowledge
that they chose a specific group of people
for a specific reason.
So there's that.
But also, I think with Brea, the problem is
that there's a certain level of entitlement
that she's exhibited over the course of the season so far.
Like she just brings her dog, doesn't tell anyone.
She puts a lot of, she just puts the seasoning on the broccoli.
But like this thing of like, well, like, I'm here alone.
I deserve to have my boyfriend too.
Like everything is kind of like I deserve this.
I deserve that.
And that's kind of like, I don't know,
it's like it comes off as a little spoiled I think.
Well, at first I'm like, what is she saying?
Why is she automatically going to racism?
So then we find out why.
So he's like, you really think that low of me?
Like you really think I make decisions based on race.
And she goes, yeah, because when we run the car,
you said I prefer our women, black women,
to be with black men.
And he goes, no, no, no, no, no, no.
I was just saying I had an affinity for black families
because I'm from a black family.
And then we see the clip six days ago where he says, listen, no, no, no. I'm just saying I had an affinity for black families because I'm from a black family. And then we see the clip six days ago
where he says, listen, I just want black women
to be married, period.
Now, my preference is to a black man,
but just married is good enough for me.
I just want people.
So I'm like, oh, okay.
So there was a little racism in there,
but there was also more sexism than racism.
So I think that your sexism outwings the racism.
What the?
Who is this fucking guy?
What the fuck is coming out of this guy's mouth?
Like, come on, man.
Well, I can definitely now see from Bria's POV
how she might feel like.
Me too.
That how she might feel like that her boyfriend
is being excluded specifically because he's white
because Silas has expressed this opinion. So I can understand why Bria might feel like she's that her boyfriend is being excluded specifically because he's white because Silas has expressed this opinion.
So I can understand why Briya might feel like
there's more going on here than meets the eye.
And there might be, I mean, I don't know.
This is where it starts to get now into an area
where I was like, I'm not gonna be like,
I'm gonna be a white guy telling you guys
how black people think, you know?
But there's definitely complicated issues now at hand
that are entering the fray.
So, Amir is like, I mean,
oh Amir, who's like the little sturer,
is in there cooking.
And he's like, oh, Jasmine, your husband might need help
because Brie is talking to him outside
and we can hear him from here.
So, you might wanna go fight with Briya because she just ruined my broccoli.
Okay. I was like, wow, a mirror's broccoli revenge. So she does, she goes out there and she's,
like, I got a dress for a toga. Briya says we're talking. So Silas is just repeating, like,
listen, I'm saying I want black women to get married period. And she goes, but you said to black men.
And he's like, I said period.
And she's like, yeah.
And then Jasmine's automatically of course standing up for him.
So she goes, yeah, period.
He said period.
So that was a period.
Okay.
I hope you heard it.
My husband said it.
Okay.
Period.
And also Silas is doing that thing where all that Brea had said was,
she started basically saying,
like if this is based off of race,
like that would be a bummer.
And now he's saying, are you calling me a racist?
You're saying I'm a racist.
She says I'm a racist.
I'm not a racist, and she's like,
I never said you were a racist.
I was saying like if his racist,
she's saying like if his racist
is a factor.
Well she's saying she thinks it's based on race.
But there still is a difference between
that and racist, I think.
I think that there's like, there's like, but I think Silas is taking it to the utmost thing,
like you're saying I'm a racist and she's saying like,
no, like I would be upset if his race were a consideration
in it, maybe about like bias or whatever, I don't know.
But either way, he is like all super upset at her now.
But then he uses the good ol'
what?
You say I'm racist?
How could you?
I'm literally in the field with white men and Latine.
I have a job that white men also have around me.
How can I possibly be like oh my.
It was kind of a funny twist on on you know
The things that we hear white guys often say in a very tone deaf way
So I think that if Brea honestly has I think her point is valid like
Having a problem with what he said in the car. I could see at first. Well, he's an idiot to say that for whatever reason
He said it. I'm not even judging what he's saying.
I'm just saying, you say that to somebody you know is dating a white guy.
That's like crazy.
Right.
I think that's not going to come back at you.
It's rude.
It's like bad manners.
And if she had a problem with it, she should have brought it up before you holding it
to have a fight about her boyfriend coming.
She should have said, listen, you said that and that bothered me.
But to use it now is, I think I'm cool
because she's being manipulative,
which is what he says.
He's like, you're manipulative.
Well, he says,
he's just a minimal to manipulative or something.
But he says it a few times where it's like,
you're being manipulative.
Like, this isn't cool.
Now you're using this against me from the other day to try and get your way. And I agree where it's like, you're being manipulative. Like, this isn't cool. And then you're using this against me
from the other day to try and get your way.
And I agree with that as well, you know?
Now, her argument is valid.
It was an asshole thing for him to say in the car,
but this isn't the right time for that fight.
These are two different.
I see points on both sides,
because I also see, remember,
talking about Real House, those New York season one,
remember the famous
girls' night at Jill's Aaron's house where Alex McCord brought Simon to it and Ramona
lost her shit.
And Ramona was being so ridiculous, but one thing that I don't know about this show and
this cast and what some of the assumptions were about this trip or what some of the agreements
were is, I don't know if there was a sentiment among the cast,
like, hey, let's have this trip
and it's gonna be like this unifying black experience, right?
Just how there could be a girl's trip,
just how there could be an all-gauge trip
or something like that.
This is something that people of a group will do.
And so if you bring someone who is not of that group,
if the trip was built on that foundation,
is that going to affect the trip, right?
And so I just don't know what the agreement was
amongst this group before they went off to Martha's Vineyard.
So I don't know if it's a violation of that or not a violation.
It is like having a girl strip and someone saying,
oh, by the way, I'm going to bring my boyfriend
or an all gay trip and being like, oh, by the way,
I'm bringing this straight bro,
which to be honest, probably would do very well on a gay strip.
But I don't know what the understanding was in this group.
But there is that consideration.
So, yeah, I'm not weighing in on that really, because I don't know, you know.
But I think that he, in the car, he said something that deserved to be called out.
She's just using it at the wrong time.
And so now they're really going at it.
And she's like, you know, you did say that.
Stop lying, stop lying. And she's like, why are you you did say that. Stop lying. Stop lying. And
she's like, why are you letting him, you know, I'm trying to have respect for him. And he's
getting loud with me, Jasmine. And Silas is like, because it breaks my heart that you think
that I'm a racist. And Jasmine's like, he's just being passionate. It's not racism. It's
fashion. And he's like, but he said it. He said he wants to see his women with a black
man. And he's a, he's like, oh, I said period. So then inside Amara's like, but he said it. He said he wants to see his women with a black man. And he's, he, uh, so I was like, oh, it's a period.
So then inside, Omar is like, so her boyfriend's coming
for three days and that's normal, but it's like five
or six days guys.
I mean, and she oversees in this broccoli, which is not good.
So yeah, she's gonna have a hard time getting over that
what she did that broccoli.
I mean, like, it was like she really went to people though. If you didn't watch the show, you really don't realize how much seasoning she put at that broccoli. I mean, like, it was like she really went, people, if you didn't watch this show,
you really don't realize how much seasoning
she put on that broccoli.
It was a pretty good show.
So it was like, I'm being lied on.
If I wasn't a car with you and you said
you would only date white men,
and I said, I prefer black guys,
you'd be pissed too, and stop this bullshit.
So they're going at each other.
And she's like, you know what,
I feel like going home.
Just be honest with what you say.
And she just goes off, pissed off. And she's like, fuck those what, I feel like going home. Just be honest with what you say. And she just goes off, pissed off.
And she's like, fuck those guys.
They're both controlling and I'm not going to be controlled.
I'm outta here.
So she goes up to her room and she throws her suitcase down on the ground.
And my little is like, wait a minute.
Does that's the best bear shit of any city we've ever been to?
Please.
No.
Don't take me from here.
Don't take me back to the city.
Central Park is not the same.
So now meanwhile, everyone's gathering to have dinner,
and not really everyone.
It's sort of like a scattered group.
Some people are in their togas,
some people aren't in their togas.
And Alex is like, hey, why aren't we all eating together?
And some are like, oh yeah, you missed a lot, by the way.
So Silas is just like hoping that Brie is and upset.
Like whatever, whatever, you know?
So they just start partying,
starting to do their game with the flip cup and everything.
And while they're all playing and having fun,
Brie is just like packing and Milo's crying,
because she's like a sad dog.
And Silas is feeling guilty, right?
So he wants to check it out.
So Silas goes upstairs, right?
So he tells everyone, I'm gonna use the bathroom.
So he goes to her room and she's like,
I'm being disrespected and put down.
Do you guys even care about my relationship?
And my love, what about my love?
And he's like, oh my God, we accepted your dog, okay?
You're just asking for this guy to come too long.
That's all we're saying. And she's like, well, I can't, I don't get to fuck my dog. So you get to
have sex every other day, but I'm supposed to fuck my dog.
It's like, what?
This is not a strong argument, Priya.
This is not. Not. So I was like, no, Jasmine and I are full members of this house,
okay?
We had to go pitch this shit to Bravo, okay, we did meetings, we had to do all these things
and say like, this is our friend group.
So to keep it real with you, like, you're a manumble-uptiff, whatever the criticism that you
have, like, you're a manumble-up.
You know, and the way that Jasmine and Silas keep going on their bad is like, we're taking
it to the house.
So I think she should take it to the house
and say, hey guys, they'd said originally,
but I just thought, did it was okay
that he was gonna come and ask him at bowling,
but I wanted to run it by everybody.
My boyfriend's coming.
I was thinking of keeping him here for a week.
Does anyone have a problem with that?
And play their own game,
because I'm sure everybody would be like, that's fine.
Like, we're in a summer house.
Like, who cares, you know?
But instead, she is just, you know, doing
what makes good entertainment really.
She's fighting with them and arguing.
And so then it looks like next week
he's gonna try and get her kicked out of the house.
So I don't know, you guys are burning through cast, Ram.
You can't just keep kicking everybody out, but we'll see how it goes.
I think she's going to stay.
I think she's going to stay.
And I think they're going to make it.
They made it look like she got kicked out, but I think she's going to stay at the very
least she kicked Silas out of her room.
So that was a small victory, perhaps a pure victory, but a small one nonetheless.
Well, we'll see everybody.
Well, thank you so much for being with us.
We will be back tomorrow with a summer house summer house.
No, I guess that's today.
Another summer house is gonna come out.
We're just gonna get here.
We're not leaving.
We're not going anywhere.
Yeah, we'll be here a lot this week.
Go check out our bonus and this is video.
So, hi to everybody on video.
Go check those out on patreon.com slash watch what crap ends under the crap ends on the
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join us where you can and guess what? Subscribe subscribe to come on,
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Yeah, the podcast and Jen, we love you guys. We'll talk to you later. Bye.
Bye.
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We're starting off with a pretty messy love triangle between Selena Gomez and Justin and
Haley Bieber, a seemingly innocent TikTok of Selena talking about her laminated eyebrows.
It snowballed into a full-blown alleged feud.
But it doesn't seem like fans are letting up anytime soon.
Despite both Selena and the Bieber's making public statements denying any bad blood.
How much of this is teen jealousy and lovers quarreling, and how much of it is a carefully
crafted narrative designed to sell albums?
Follow this and tell wherever you get your podcasts.
You can listen ad-free on the Amazon Music or Wonder App.
So albums.
Follow this and tell wherever you get your podcasts.
You can listen ad-free on the Amazon Music or Wondering app.