Watch What Crappens - Summer House MV: Iron Man

Episode Date: June 27, 2023

*Also avail as video on Crappens On Demand http://bit.ly/crappensvideo* Jasmine and Silas go head to head in the season finale Summer House Martha's Vineyard podcast, and Bria might be done with Simon. This week's bonus is an Airport Snaps episode from Chicago O'Hare and you can find by joining Patreon.com/watchwhatcrappensSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hey, Prime members, you can listen to watch what crap ends at free on Amazon Music. Download the app today. This episode is sponsored by Uber1. We've all used Uber for rides, and I love using UberEats for food delivery. Okay, hello. I mean, I kind of live off of it. But have you ever heard about Uber1? Uber1 is a membership that helps you save on Uber and UberEats. With an Uber-1 membership, you get exclusive member perks, like up to 10% off UberEats and a $0 delivery fee on eligible orders. It just makes sense. I'm always getting Uberes.

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summer house Martha's Vineyard. I'm just pretending I'm there on the vineyard. Although I've never been. What about you? What's going on with you? I'm not pretending I'm there. Doesn't seem very peaceful. I was actually worried at the beginning. I'm like, oh God, this is just going to be one of those like the seasons ready to dwindle down and everyone's just going to be like, oh, we just saw each other. And it's like the end of below deck, you know, how they're like, I learned so much on this show. And this is what I learned to see them. And I can't wait to go back to Florida or wherever. But no, it wasn't. It was very dramatic. It's very, very dramatic. And really, Silas has really done some great work being just a terrible person, a terrible, terrible villain for us all to hate.

It feels great. In fact, you know what? As I said, there was thunder outside, so it feels like even to heaven's degree. Yeah. Silas is a shithead. Wow. Yes. I mean, like, even if you, you know, there have been some comments here and there online that

I've been reading, like, you know, the arguments that people are bringing up, basically, like, they're a arrangement and their marriage. And she says this in this episode, Jasmine, Jasmine does, that they have an agreement and their marriage that he brings home the money and she does the housework or whatever. I mean, even if that's your arrangement and you decide to go kind of an old school way, first of all, hmm, but second of all, you're allowed to do that, but he's such an asshole about it. He's still an asshole. Like it doesn't make him a less of an asshole. No, what I'm saying. Yeah. Also, like that can be your arrangement fine, whatever you decide that's what you're gonna do, but also this is not like an actual job where if you don't do your duties,

to do, but also this is not like an actual job where if you don't do your duties, then for like one week that they're for your fired. So like make your own sandwich. Make yourself a peanut butter and jelly. If she's busy or wants to be relaxing and not be doing the things that she does on a daily basis. Right. So basically, here we are. We're to stand off because he has complained about the food she made him.

And he's already been mad about her not tied sticking his pants and putting a mark on them with the iron and doing it incorrectly. So he's really pissed. And now she's made him food, which I think that she secretly put carbs in there because she has to know he doesn't eat carbs. She says, why? And cooks all of his food. So she knows this.

So she purposely fed him carbs to get as her passive aggressive way to argue and now they're having a standoff where he's like, I won't eat carbs. How dare you? Yeah, that's where we left off. And then where we pick up on the season finale, out of nowhere in opening credits.

A theme song, a theme song emerges out of nowhere for like eight seconds. I'm pretty sure we have not seen any opening credits, right? For this entire season. I've never seen opening credits for this. No. They're like, let's just throw one in at the end of the season to see how that works. I think Bravo was like, oh, I think we'd like this. Shall let's give it another chance.

So let's come up with an opening. It deserves an opening. Let's get it in there for the last episode so people know we're serious. But the song, I did not get the tune because it's only really been one time, so it's unfair to expect it. Okay, audience. But it's, I want to have some fun tonight. I know it's in the way. Some of us are going to be okay. What the fuck, why is this here now? Oh,

that was my nose. My nose. Yeah. I know it's in the way. Some of us are going to be okay. It's not a very comforting song, you know. I want to have fun. Some of us are going to be okay. Like what happens to the rest of us? Do people die on this song? It happens on this. Yeah.

Yeah. There's a brutal twist at the end of this episode. Not everyone's making it off the island. They all die, unfortunately. Also, another harbinger of Doom is that there's like a lighthouse. We see a lighthouse, but it's a very short and stubby lighthouse, and I predict a lot of people have crashed onto the silent

because that lighthouse ain't set. I'm just gonna say it right now, if that lighthouse is fucking useless, there was never a time in history where that lighthouse made any sense. It has very bad yelp reviews. If you look it up, it only has like two and a half. And there's one woman on there who's like, my name is Marjorie. And I've been to

many lighthouses. And I've always been able to park my boat perfectly fine. But I literally sank my boat when I came to this lighthouse. Like I do not recommend it for anyone. I was like, my how Marjorie really is a really nice. She's a real asshole. I mean, she lost her ship, so I get it. But I also like that lighthouse trying to the best it can. Yeah, the only person with worse reviews than that lighthouse on Martha's Vineyard is Jasmine as an ironer and tide sticker and a branch of storage provider. Yeah, because you know, it's like, really, this is how you treat me. I shall be putting this into your Yale perfume.

Just like Jasmine sucks with tide sticks. Sucks with ghost sticks. So it's, so meanwhile, we actually open with Alex and Nick. They're outside, they're planning this big bananza for the last night. It's gonna be a whole thing, because Alex was talking last week about how he wants to sing a song

for everything that's been night of black tie and like fashion. And it's okay, Ronnie, it's okay, Ronnie. Just knocked over or something. You're too much, you go? I'm fiddling around and I was opening a topo, Chico and then I have my pop socket off my phone. So my phone can charge, but then I moved my phone and I was moving the pop socket over,

but then the pop socket grabbed the bottle opener and lifted the bottle opener and then I, Ronnie. Yeah. We have an arrangement. Okay. Your job is to open up your topochiko. Cleanly and quietly and if you can't do that, what is it in the morning? I'm okay, fine.

We have routines, Ronnie. Okay, I wake up at 8 a.m. I have my breakfast and expect silence and no typo-chico sounds. Oh. So Preston is sitting in that sunroom arrow, and then it says Jasmine, arrow-ding. Jasmine.

And so she's like, well, Preston, I do have a plate set aside. So if you would like to eat, it's always yours. I was like, oh, wow, thank you. I get to eat your husband's judgment. Mm. Sounds delicious. Rejected starches.

So who rejects a carb? I mean, listen, whatever you think of this situation, get the fuck out of it. A man who says no to carbs. Even if I'm not eating, whatever you think of this situation, get the fuck out of a man who says no to carbs. Even if I'm not eating carbs and you bring me french fries with my salad, I'm going to say I'm not eating carbs right now, but please leave these here. And then I eat them anyway, and then I go back to my eating carbs after, like a real fucking human being who was the carb. Or here's a wild idea. Eat around the starches.

Just eat everything that's around the starches and leave them over and say, here, you eat these, I can't eat these right. Or even more radical, how about say, you know what, thank you so much for making these. You know, unfortunately I'm not eating starch right now, but I eat everything else and it was delicious. But if you want these potatoes,

because I unfortunately can't eat them, how about you say that instead of starches? I don't eat starches. Oh, no. So, or just be passive aggressive about it. Don't be mean to the starches, just start eating the tide ghost pen. And then when she says, what are you doing?

Just say, I'm using this wrong, like you did. You know, at least give us a fun passive aggressive argument. Or walk your ass into the kitchen, make yourself a PB&J sandwich. So, you know, those don't work for me. Can you ever been able to eat a one peanut butter and jelly sandwich? I've seen people do it on TV.

I've never done it in real life. I have to have a stack of four, and then I stack them all on top of each other, and then I cut them in little diamonds, and then I eat that. That's okay. But you all start to have fritos or something on the side. You do not just that.

But who eats just one sandwich with that thin layer of nothing really on it? They're more like a snack. They're like a snack plus. They're not as small as a snack, but they're not as substantial as a proper sandwich. They kind of get you through until the real sandwich comes or like the real meal, you know? Or they just get you through to the next snack, you know? So Amir is sad because he's going to be sad to leave everyone because he doesn't have this group in Texas.

And then Silas is moping around the kitchen because he didn't get, you know, because his wife didn't make him the food he wanted, so he just moping around the kitchen because he didn't get you know because his wife didn't make him the food He wanted so he just moping around and he's silent and he's like I haven't eaten lunch so I'm hungry You know like I think he just waiting for the food to materialize I guess yeah I think he thought she was gonna go back in there and make him Something without starch, but she's like fuck you. I'm not gonna do that It's starting and so yeah he comes comes in and Jasmine just sighs and leaves and Then Silas sighs because I'm your ass them if they're good. So then Jasmine calls her grandmother and

Man, you know you're indeed you know you're really sad and you call your grandmother for some shit You know yeah because I feel like I don't bother I didn't my grandmothers have passed now But I don't bother. I didn't my grandmothers have passed now, but I don't feel like I bothered my grandma's with shit like this. I think you called someone that old because you want her to say, but you're, you know, it's tradition. You should stick with it, you know, instead of calling anyone younger who would say, get the fuck away from that asshole. If I called my grandma Sally and said, grandma Sally, my boyfriend, like he wants me to make him a plate of food

and I made it for him but he doesn't want it. She'd say, punch him in the face. Like she would speed like, get rid of him. You know? So I love your aunt's alley. Or your grandma's alley. I wish. She would take a hose.

She would like, the famous story is that she's take, like, there are a lot of stories about grandma's alley, but one of them involves a hose. One of them involves her marching down to the playground and like roughing up some local teenagers. Like she was, she got down to business. She wasn't like these, she wasn't like these Bravo grandmas. We're like, well, honey, maybe you should think about this.

She would, she would fuck you up. She'd fuck somebody up, yeah, I like her. So, um, we, so Jasmine is like, yeah, you know, my mom and dad were never married. And so the Hux and so the Hux The Hux were always an example to me because what was Claire Hux? Well, Hux double. No, she was a lawyer. A lawyer. Yeah, well, it is actually very funny that you say, was he a doctor and she was a lawyer? She was a doctor and he was an obstetrician.

But like, it's funny that like, it is funny because she has this very traditional arrangement with Silas. But Claire and what's his face were like, actually, she's like a modern, Claire is a modern working woman who is not sitting at home making meals for her husband. Yes. So yeah, I was like, well, that's a weird example. So then we go to Silas and he's explaining to a mirror.

He's like, you know, it's just on vacation, we get off our routine and, well, I stay on my routine. So when I say we, I mean her, because my last meal was at 8 a.m. So, oh, really? And what is it now, 11? And you can. I know. So that's not only on your routine.

So that's not only on your routine. So she has to feed you every two hours. Fuck off, dude. Like, was it on your routine? That's fine. You want to stay on your routine because you have, you know, whatever issues you have. So stay on your routine. That doesn't, you're on vacation though.

She doesn't have to be on her routine, okay? And by the way, the fact that like, her making him food is bound to a routine and does not actually come organically from like, oh, I just want to make him lunch. Show that, I think she clearly does not want to do this stuff, but she's doing it because she agreed to be on a quote-unquote routine. Right? Like, I kind of feel like if you're going to take these traditional roles,

you should take these traditional roles because you actually enjoy that aspect of it, not because your husband said, I'm on this routine, so you have to be on this routine. I think she's doing it because she considers it a job. His job, probably the way it's been explained to her, is my job is to go work. Your job is to run the household, right? That's kind of like the standard setup

of that kind of relationship, right? Yeah. But she's thinking, well, I'm on vacation. So why would I do my job? It's a vacation. I'm on vacation. So I don't have to make you food. But he's like, well, I still have to do my job on vacation.

So you still have to do your job on vacation. And she's like, fuck you. And also she's probably humiliated because when she made this deal with him, it was in private and she didn't realize how fucking lame she looks to all of her friends. And now that she's seeing the looks on her friends faces when he's acting like this and all controlling and bossy and all this other stuff, she's probably

realizing what a mistake she's made. Rent is not that hard to pay. It's easier to have a job than to deal with a person like that. And I said it last week and I'm going to say it again. If this guy is not abusive already, he will be. It's not because he just wants his dinner cut. It's the way he talks to her and the way he demeans her and the way he publicly gets off on shaming her. And if it's not physical, it will be emotional. The person and I say something. If they ever have a baby, good luck.

Because this is gonna be one of those husbands who gets jealous of the children, right? Because he is demanding, literally demanding that she makes her his lunch. I mean he doesn't get the lunch He pouts the tied stick the steaming later every single thing. He like needs he needs to be coddled and for as much talk as I'm a grown man He literally needs to be coddled on these very basic things and so when a child comes in the picture and the child is now suddenly You know like she's splitting time for this, the child and him, he is going to lose his mind.

And it's gonna be terrible. I'm telling you this right now, it will be terrible. And you know, he is doing it away, like we were saying earlier, like how you, it's not just that you're asking for it, it's how you're asking for it. This is the guy who would like call customer service and then be like, can I speak with a manager? Cause I don't like the way that you're speaking to me.

He goes all the way up the chain to complain about the customer service that he's getting. Like right now, he says, you know, when I have an issue, I just want an acknowledgement that it was an issue. And Jason's like, got it, got it, got it. He wants an apology letter from the corporation. We are sorry about your carbs, okay? Here's $20 off your neck. Here's a free tide to go stick, sir.

By the way, great marketing for tide to go. So then, Salis tells us, part of my personality is that I plan for things and then I execute that plan and then I move on to something else. So I'm like, yeah, by the way, really moving on to something else as he complains like hours and hours and hours later about a tide stick. And he's like, you know, so with Jasmine, she's just a bit more free-flowing with things. So she's going with the wind and I'm frustrated because that's not going to do it for me.

I'm like, listen, if you know that she goes, she's going with the wind, she's free-flowing, you have to accept that, okay, you do not get into relationships wanting to change people. That is her personality. You can be a rigid person who, like, like, very militaristic and about the way you do all your stuff. That's fine, but don't expect her to do everything just like you, you crazy person. Yeah, well, it sounds like from what we get from her later that that's what she agreed to do.

She just doesn't want to do it right now, to which I say, don't get into a relationship where you're thinking you're gonna change the other person, but also don't get it into a relationship where you're thinking you're gonna change yourself. Like you're not the kind of person who's gonna wanna tide stick this mother fucker's thing or he's complain. I'm not gonna buy that This is the first time that he's complaining about her tight sticking skills or her the way she ironed his certain stuff

And don't try and be somebody else for somebody like that I have to say though I think it is also possible that you can get into relationship and be like yeah, you know You're you're let's do some traditional roles. You're going to go to work and you're gonna have two monitors on your computer. And I'm gonna take care of you. I will do the laundry, I'll do this and that.

But I don't think that maybe it's quite possible that you say that not thinking that you have to literally do every minuscule task for this person because they're too incapable of doing it for themselves. Like, that's true. There's a spot on the pants. It's like, I think it's a little unreasonable to be expected to have to drop everything. Or on top of that, like, he's also getting mad because he's not doing it on his timetable.

So like, she in fact has a range to do, like, she later on in the episode, obviously, we're like not even there yet. She, like, she sets everything in motions that way she can do all the things she needs to do to fulfill her end of it, but because it's not when he wants to do it, he flips his lid, but the truth is like if he's having his job, he's doing the job, he's doing his job

the way he wants to do his job. So let her do her tasks the way that she wants to do it. TLDR, he's a dick. Yeah, he's terrible. He's dead. That's terrible. So now for their last day, they're going to go on a tour. They're going to get like a heritage tour.

And so they do. The Slady Christie gives them some history of the place. Christie Van. I was a vendor hoop or van, either way. I was like wow. She's coming very close To having a to having a little better pump get a manager Yeah, I think it's vendor hoop not vendor poop. Sorry. She's like I'd like to welcome you to vendor hoop gardens here on the math has been yet So see

She's basically giving some history and they go on a little tour and stuff and it's really funny because she's like so This house Diana Ross stayed here the summer that she dated Gene Simmons from kiss and everyone's like what? She's like yeah, and she goes so you've also you guys have heard about the wedding right they're like Who's wedding and she's like the book the wedding, right? They're like, who's wedding? And she's like, the book, the famous book, the wedding. They're like, it's like the movie. You heard of the movie, the wedding? They're like, no.

She's like, okay, I really have to update the references on this tour. It's official. She's like, okay, well, the movie had Halle Berry in it. And that movie was based on a book that was written by Dorothy West. So so glad you came dummies. Okay, the next tour I'm going to say, this is the house that Dorothy West went to and a bunch of dumb people who don't know anything. So

that yeah, she just are making stuff up. She's like Josephine Baker used to get coffee over here. It's time for commercial. It's time for a crap and commercial. So, um, now we go back to the house and, um, there's more things, more stuff is being set up. And so Amir is cooking and Silas comes in. He's like, he's like, yo, dog, I am starving. And I'm here. It's like,

well, this is all your wife's doing because basically Jasmine had told Amir, hey, can you like finish this shrimp and rice, right? And she's going to get her. She had her pretty much, but she wanted to run an errand. So she's like, would you just finish this off for me? Yeah. So Amir was like, oh, yeah, this is all your wife's doing. I just picked up where she left off. And so I was like, well, where'd she go? And she's like, would you just finish this off for me? Yeah, so a mirror was like, oh yeah, this is all your wife's doing. I just picked up where she left off. And so I was like, well, where'd she go? And she's like, well, I just turned Silas into a remote where'd she go?

Okay. And a mirror's like, oh, she had to run an errand. So now Silas starts stomping around all angry. Yes, so he goes into their room and that's where she is. And he's like, babe, where's the iron? Oh, where's the iron? Oh, where's the iron? Oh, it's on the phone. Oh, it's your right, yeah.

Call me in the room. I wrote, Jasmine and phone. If you're hiring, you know what it's like to deal with economic uncertainty. And now more than ever, it's really important to hire the right people faster and more efficiently because you gotta keep the overall cost down. And thankfully, there's a hiring partner

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But he's walking around going, babe, where's the iron? Where is it? Oh, I think I see it over there. She goes, I'm gonna be back in six minutes. All you have to do is put your suit out and I will steam it when I get there. He's like, hmm, she's like, okay, and he's like, hmm, nah, fine, fine.

So then she comes back, she's like, Jesus, I had to skip to my allude to get back for you, man, baby. Because I was like a little confused because I was like, I was like, okay, well, she got her dress and she got everything, but like what was so eminent that she would like leave and such a short, with such a short time for me to get ready.

So he's like really pissy, that he didn't know that she was going out to get an errand, that she left a mirror to finish the shrimp and that like the window of time might not have been enough time for him. She goes, but you had your food, so I was done with my tasks, so I had time to do what I was done with my tasks.

So I had time to do what I wanted to do. And he's like, listen, Amir is not bringing me food, babe. Men don't bring each other. Oh, fuck. Have you been to a restaurant? Have you been to a restaurant? Relax. You heard of a gay person, even if you're

even if you're only talking about relationships, like fuck you, dude. You should only talking about relationships like fuck you dude You should be so lucky enough anyone bringing you food who cares if it's a of a man woman or non-binary or anything Honestly, it's a big other Jordan and Nick talking about basically ever she's they're talking about what to wear She's like do you have a jacket and he goes yeah, it's double breasted and she's like I have double breasts And I was like oh, she sexualized herself. It's gonna be trouble. She's gonna have, she's gonna be really pissed under herself in a minute.

So Silas is still stomping around. She's like, it's definitely not about you not being here to press my suit babe. I'm not gonna lie. Oh no, definitely is about, it's sorry. It's definitely about you not being here to press my suit babe. I'm not gonna lie.

It's definitely about that. But I'm like messy bib, not gonna lie. It's definitely about that. But I'm like, but she's literally here. She's here to press your suit for the, also by the way, you're not going the Oscars. You're going the backyard. So she's like, well, I found a way to get what I wanted done and also make sure you had everything you needed. So you were fed while I was gone.

And then I was making sure someone was bringing the steamer here for me to do your suit when I got back because I wanted to set myself up so I could be steaming your clothes. Okay, gross. Okay, first of all, this conversation gets another four grosses for me, gross. And he's like, well, that didn't happen, did it?

She goes, well, why not? Because I'm almost done and you're almost done. So how did it not get done? And he's like, I'm almost done with no assistance from you. And she's like, okay, well, even if she's like, well, how about this? I didn't need your help. And if you had stuff set up for me,

then I could have steamed it. You know, I've been here for 20 minutes with nothing to do, but steam your outfit. And he just walks off. Well, pissed off. I don't think he had to steam. Steam himself. I don't think it's gross or crazy that she said,

okay, well, I knew I wanted to steam this outfit for him. So I rearranged the stuff and I had a mirror finish the thing and I came back and I left it with enough time to steam your outfit. Like, if anything, I think that's kind of cool that she's like, she arranged her shit together and she knew her time and she knew how, how much time she needed it and she put it all together. She did it. Sorry.

I've turned for it. It's gross to me because I don't like listening to someone. Apologize over and over. She's fucking man. Yes, she is. She's like, I'm, I think she's like, I had all of this list to do everything for you. And to me that's gross. I'm sorry it's gross. I don't know. I think any partner being treated like that or they're having to go back pedal and like explain themselves and like I have to have all these excuses just to run one fucking errand when I've done everything. It's gross to me. I agree you're on a fucking suit. I think it's gross that she has to have excuses. But a gross to me i don't know i agree on a fucking csses i think it's grossed it's just excuses

but i think that like i don't mind if someone says like oh i wanted to do something for my boob and i said it all up but i don't like it's him being totally unappreciative and then making her feel bad and like you know like he freaked out he was the one who'd like he couldn't bear to stand still just to chill out in that room for five minutes while she came back and then she was gonna steam his shit. He like, lost his mind, then he does it, then he blamed her that he had to do it. What all he had to do is actually have a little faith

in his wife that she would take care of the shit that she said she was gonna take care of, you know? It's not about like, you know, I think we're kind of arguing two different things to be honest, but I just think that he has no trust in her and totally insecure. Yeah, and I agree with you, she should not even have to make these excuses

and not even have to panic and do all these things to just for Silas, but given that she is doing it, she's allowed to create a plan for herself and then do the plan, just the way Silas says he does things. So they're getting ready and everyone's getting really dressed up and fancy for this party.

And a bunch of people come in. It's like a lot of gathering, okay? There's a lot of gathering. So Jasmine is talking to Jordan about how she's fighting with Simon, Eris Silas, and she's like, well, I mean, we're in a fight about his damn suit. And Jordan goes, uh-oh, did you burn it up? Which I love. Jordan already knows. She already knows because Jasmine has probably burned things with iron so many times in their lives as friends. Yeah. And, uh, Jazz has been saying that, you know, Salas and I definitely discuss what works for us in terms of roles and responsibilities.

But I left that at the door when I came here on vacation. Okay, I'm not thinking about that routine to be honest, but, like, apparently Salas did not get that. And so, now Salas is stomping around again saying, I just want an acknowledgement. That's it. Just want an acknowledgement. Like, of what? You couldn't sit still for six minutes to wait for someone to esteem your thing for you. So you had to do it yourself.

Like, what do you want the acknowledgement for? And she's saying, you know, for him, it's really important for him to let me know how he feels, which I really actually appreciate. But sometimes it's exhaust, no. Your feelings are not a complaint list to an employee. That's not your feelings. You're having your suit not ironed the way you want isn't explaining to somebody how you feel. You know what I mean? I don't know. This whole thing just pisses me off.

And then in a very shit, and what I believe is kind of a shady thing by the by not shady, but definitely a commentary by the post-production. We then see a montage of everyone else in the house earning all their stuff. Yeah, got for a bit. And so she's like, he just doesn't move on. He just has to talk about it and talk about it. It's like, why are you so emotional?

And Jordan's just glad that she has dropped the facade of perfection for a moment. And she's like, yeah, you know, she's being authentic and she's keeping it real. And I think that's a testament to how close we are. It's like, oh, what? Your friend is being real with you the first time this whole summer. That's a testament to your friendship. Okay. How about she's been

an asshole all summer to you and that's a testament that you need to work on this shit. But it is nice to see Jasmine finally getting sick of it. I hope she left him. Did she leave him? Do we even know? Oh, she seems over it by the end of this episode. Oh, no, I don't know, but I'm assuming they're still together and I'm assuming that now Silas is working on his new personality of like, I was just going through a lot. No, I was overbearing. I've learned not to be like that anymore.

I guarantee that's what we're gonna see if there's a second season. So now, throughout all this guests are coming into the house including Alex's brother Al. And it is, his name is Al. Last week we're like, it's his name Al or Al Tariq, but he could, they is referred to as Al. So it is Alex and Al, the brothers and Alex is like, my brother Al is here.

And immediately I feel a sense of home right here. And he like taps his heart. I'm like, oh, that's where my heart is. And I was a really shy kid. And I would ask him, could you be my voice? Can you ask mom and dad if we can go to McDonald's? Because I didn't have a voice. But now I'm the one with the mic.

I was like, wow, you can order a quarter pounder now. You've really come a long way, baby. He's just singing. Singing at the drive-through now at McDonald's. Like, I'm loving it, just like Oh the pickles, oh the lettuce, special artists don't upset us All we ask is that you let us have it your way A big Mac deal to your God-up founder with some just filet And I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I flyer fish, a hamburger, a cheeseburger, a happy meal, but I'll say it's a cool different dress regular or larger size

and then it goes on and on and on. That's really good. God, I want to make you a bowl of protein right now. I will gladly either. I'm starving. I really want to steam a soup for you right now. That was hot. So there's a violinist playing

because of course it's an Alex event. And so he's like, it's art. So it's a drum machine and a violinist playing because of course it's an Alex event and so he's like it's art So it's a drum machine and a pianist and a keyboardist and a violinist. It's like okay. Yeah completely natural trio but He's singing and I was like this is not gonna be good because He's hopping around singing and I was like not I put he sings Question mark can't tell that's that's my that's my first impression. I was worried, he sings a little question mark, can't tell. That's my first impression.

I was worried. Nick is setting some stuff up. Nick is really buzzing around. This is definitely his ministry of setting things up, but you can just tell. He's really sad that his girl isn't here. Tasia and Alex is like, don't worry, bro. She's here with you. Nick is like, yeah, right here.

He taps his heart. He's like, these guys just love tapping their heart. Alex is like, that't worry bro, she's here with you. And Nick is like, yeah, right here, and he taps his heart. I was like, these guys just love tapping their heart. Alex is like, that's where your heart is. Yeah, that's where hearts live. So now everyone's coming out, everyone's like in the backyard now, and they have, this is a great looking cast, and they look amazing in their formal wear.

And Nick and Alex are on the balcony, and Alex is like, ladies and gentlemen and people who aren't crazy, like Shanice, welcome to our big night. Nick is like, it's luck on the bluffs, which almost rhymes. It's Martha's Vineyard Serenade. The style and impeccable dress is very important to me because my mother, oh, this is Nick.

He says, yeah, it's Nick. He says the style and impeccable dress is very important to me because my mother taught oh this is Nick. He says, yeah, it's Nick. He says, the style and impeccable dress is very important to me because my mother taught me this quote, if you walk out of the house looking any kind of way, people are gonna treat you any kind of a way. So I'm here to make connections that will last a lot. I was like, is your speech really about

how many pairs of pants you have? Because that's what that meant. That meant you brought the most pairs of pants, sir. Okay. Basically, if you walk out dressed like shit, the people who are dressed well are gonna make fun of you. So dress like the people who look good.

So, why is he giving the speech? Let Alex give the speech. At least Alex won't make any sense, but he'll try and make it sound poetic. Like that's your quote. So then the event begins, he give a toast to Martha, and then a guy named Josiah Bassi starts singing. I don't know if he's related to what's what's your face? Bassi, but he starts singing a song about bass. What's her face? Bassi.

I am sorry. I'm the start of fucking fight. I'm like, what is going on here today? No, I met Shirley. Yeah. Okay. Shirley Bass gonna start a fucking fight. I'm like, what is going on here today? You know who I met, Shirley? Yeah, okay. Shirley Bassi, okay redemption. You saved it and I'll see you know all those lyrics. Yeah, so he's, I'm gonna just go it's off of the Capitol, I got from the McDonalds song.

But you start seeing a song about pressure, but it sounds like you're saying pressure. He's like, pressure, pressure, pressure, give me that pressure, pressure. I'm like, I love this commitment to historical countries. So then a car pulls up and someone's arriving and someone's walking through the house. Do you think it for that joke?

I was like, what? Then I got it when you were a child. It used to be a place. You're very... There's also a mall with the King of Pressure mall. Oh. So the song could have been just like an ode to that mall. So, uh.

So, uh. Great deals at the King of Prussia. Prussia, Prussia, give me more of that Prussia, Prussia mall. But I love that he's singing a song about Prussia and then we get a tsssss and a car's pulling up and we get a close up at the back of Nick's head and someone's coming through the house. It's a girl and I cannot believe this is an actual person. I have to say I admit, I'm shocked.

I did not think that this person was real. Good for her, but also Yikes, when you see what Nick's been doing. Well, you've been an apricot. But I cannot believe she was real. I thought she was totally gonna be fake. I Thoughts are to or on maybe she's an AI generated deep fake that they just inserted into the show Oh, yeah I mean, I thought even if she shows up she's gonna be one of those rolling carts like those robotic rolling carts with a smiling face on it

It serves you boba tea at the at the ramen place or like you know on big brother some seasons They put someone in like a room in isolation. They put like a camera on wheels in the house that just rolls around. I thought that's what she would be. But she's real. And real housewives of Dallas, they did that when Deandra was like,

I can't keep your party, so here I am, mother. And they just were like, her rolling around, following every video around. Yeah, so that's what I thought, we that's what we all thought toasia would be, but Tasia's real and she walks through the house and she comes up behind Nick and then Alex on the mic goes, there's a wonderful surprise just behind Nick. I was like, well, we had a tip

to surprise Alex. Let Nick to let Tasia tap him on the back for crying out loud. So Nick is so excited, you know, and then Jordan is like, all that's running through my head right now is Alia. Girl, if you only knew your man came in single. Yeah. And everyone's like, oh, cool. So that's Tasia. Got it. Great. So now there's more of everyone's like awkward.

Because they're like, she just walked into the most cringy situation ever, you know. It's like, obviously, she doesn't know what's been going on. I'll tell you what's awkward. All these musicians who slept up to Martha's Vineyard had to probably take a ferry to get there And were probably promised you get to sing on Bravo television and they all just get shoved into a montage without even their names Being put on screen or their voices being heard they just play some sort of like generic music and just show people singing. And I was like, oh, you poor saps. Yeah.

Alex was trying to do that for the collective. Like, guys, I'm putting a song on TV. We're all going to make it. And that's what I did for this group. I'm begging. And that was time for Alex's song. He goes, this song I wrote with my brother is to address What is a beautiful union between this collective? Here well, okay, so he starts singing and he has a pretty nice voice I don't I felt like it was a different key than the music that it seemed to me like that he was in a different key like it was right I mean, I don't think he was off key. I think he was just like good. I think he was in a different key. Like, he was, right? I mean, I don't think he was off key.

I think he was just like good. I think he was good. He's good. I don't think he was like, he's good. I think he was good, especially for Bravo. You know, when someone whips it out on Bravo, you gotta give him credit if they don't sound like, Happy birthday.

Yeah, it was good. He wasn't like, okay, he gets a high pitch good, not like, he was good. Like low pitches when you're really good, he was good. But he gets like, no, no, he wasn't. Yeah, he wasn't great, but he doesn't have a career ahead of him, but he doesn't have to be completely humiliated. But I wouldn't like whip that out when John Legend's over at Christmas.

You know what I mean? Like, it's not that kind of good. So people dance and stuff. And some are crying, listening to his song. She's like, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, she's crying to Jordan. And Jordan's like, hell no, I'm not crying.

That the fuck is this song? What does this even mean? No, I'm not gonna cry at this sexualizing creep. So afterwards, Jason's like, who did a great job? You had some crying. And then a mirror goes up to summer. This is a mirror's like, so summer,

the assumptions I made about you when I first saw you, were not good. I'm like, why are you telling her this? She's like, oh, tell me, tell me more. Because I thought you were princess. I thought you were intrusive. I thought you were straight up bitch. I thought that you would maybe burn down a house

sometime in your life. I felt like you would poison a person. You know, things like that. I know. That was, he was really weird. And then Silas is cracking up because he loves this, you know? And he's like leaning on him. You're like, that's the best thing you've ever said. And the summer's like, but now, and he goes, now I see you as curious.

It's like, wow, I think you're sending poetic be quiet. Just be quiet. At least stop, stop. Salas, because that's a curious way, that's a curious way of, curious is a nice way of saying get your nosy. So Preston goes to Briya and he's like, so this and Briya, I'm so proud of you. You've grown so much from beginning to end. And I think it's because all of us have grown in ways that we didn't think are possible. What?

What are you talking about? Five days. And no, she hasn't. She literally has actually devolved. She's actually gotten worse. I mean, she's just spent like yesterday or the day before all day in bed because she didn't want to fight with anybody. Like, maybe she like learned not to dump an entire like jar of seasoning on the broccoli. Maybe that's where the growth came from, but I'm pretty sure

she's actually spiraled out of control over the course of the past 15 days. It's time for commercial. It's time for- Hi, I'm Michael Patrick King, host of the official Max Companion podcast, and just like that, the writers room. Each episode members of the writers room and I unpacked moments from season 2, sharing juicy details you can only hear from us. Stream and just like that season 2 is starting June 22nd on Max, and listen to end just like that, the writers room on Max or wherever you get your podcast

So Amir is asking Tasia's like so how did you get to know um Nick? Man, I presume it was at a pamph store because he really loves pants He loves this one store called pantsants and Pants and Pants. Have you been there? Slacks. Slacks are us. You just love some slacks. And she's like, well, you know, first we were friends,

but then I thought, wow, I feel grateful to have someone with such a pure heart loving me. Here is that heart again. Could you show me where the heart is? It's right here. Right, right here on my chest. Right here. Right inside here.

My heart has a voice now. Hold on, let me see what it's saying. I want more, I want a big Mac. My heart wants a big Mac. My heart has a voice now. Thank God. So they all toast to a great night of listening to live music. And Silas is, Silas, because up to jazz, and he's like,

I'm gonna be nice to you again. It's like, oh, thanks for the honor, Silas, real pleasure. I didn't understand why Preston said to black fucking excellence, because didn't Preston say that he doesn't like that term? I assumed he was being tongue in cheek, because he didn't like the term. Yeah, so maybe he was thinking like,

okay, let's end it off now. This is what you can say. This is why you can, this is when you can say, black fucking excellence. I was like, wow, if anyone's changed, they should have changed Preston's mind. Yeah, no, I got the sense he was being coy. So now there's like people are like are hanging around.

They're inside. They're talking about how they loved Alex's song, and somewhere amidst this, Simon definitely snorted some lines because all of a sudden he goes, Hey guys, I'm ready to part there! Time for party! Time to part there! And then he jumps in the pool in his talks,

and everyone's like, whoa, because no one else is on the same drawing. Except I think Briya, because Briya, you know, Briya's reaction later is a little suspicious as well. But I think those two were hiding. I think those watches all have little compartments in them. They have little mirrors that come out. So Simon is like all of a sudden 10 times more extra than everyone else there and being crazy and everyone's like, okay, and Jason's like, Priya, get your man, he's in the pool with a whole nice ass fruit.

And so they're like, okay, weird. So then Teja goes inside to go to the bathroom. And when she's going into the bathroom, Bria tracks her down and sits down with her on the sofa. And we just know this is trouble because Bria is just not smooth about this stuff. So Bria is like, so Nick said, you were on a girls retreat in South Africa. And Tasia's like, yeah, it's like 26 girls of us. And she goes, yeah, wow, well, I wish I was there because this shit has been like rehab for me and she's like holding a glass of wine

and Tasia's like, rehab. You have a drink. Like you're literally holding a drink and she goes, well, rehab as in freedom from feeling. What? What is that being like? What was she said? I thought it was rehab for feelings.

Or rehab for feelings. Tasia actually tries to hit the glass out of her hand. And she's like, no, I was being metaphorical. Okay? Because I've been healing. And I learned from me to handle situations differently and not to be aggressive in certain situations. You know, like not scream at people unresonably,

not cry uncontrollably, not seems. Drag my entire household into a stupid drama about a dog. Yeah. And I like also that she said, you know, because Tasia says, did you learn anything? And she goes, yeah, I've learned a lot from myself. Oh, okay. That's great. Usually how people learn.

So she goes, well, it seems like everyone loves Simon. So that's great. Usually how people learn. So she goes, well, it seems like everyone loves Simon. So that's good. And she goes, I mean, but how do you feel knowing that Nick was coming into the house? And there's friends here and there's girls here. And she goes, well, he wanted to. And I said, it was okay. And Nick's like, oh, hey, I got your lipstick

that you asked for. And she's, Bree is like, will, hey, I got your lipstick that you asked for and she's breathed. So he's just standing there now, listening to this. And Bri is like, well, I mean, we didn't even know you guys were together until the second week. So I mean, obviously we had some questions because you know,

oh, oh. So Jay, I think Jason sees what's going on and he's like, I'm gonna let this in play out. So he like pulls Nick away, brings him to the backyard. So Bria continues. She's like, so you guys have been together for one year and he's just like, yes, yes we have. And Brea's like, oh, cause we were confused

because in the beginning, we didn't know you guys were together up until the second week. In the beginning, he was in a lot of my friends DMs. There was shonees, for instance. And I was like, hey, Nick's girlfriend is coming and she was like, wait, he has a girlfriend, but he's been in my DMs. Like there was shonees for instance, you know, and you know, I was like, hey, Nick's girlfriend is coming and she was like, wait, he has a girlfriend, but he's been in my DMs. And he's been sending me hearts and saying, like,

I was his wife, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. So isn't that funny, Tisha? Isn't that funny? That what I just told you? Oh my God, and then we see pictures of it. And it's like, special, dot, dot, dot, you are special. Looking forward to meeting you Thursday.

Have you always been so fine? He's like, oh God, these are not just like, hey, you know, I'm in your DMs liking your things. It's like, you're so fine. But this is also so obnoxious of Bria, because if Bria were truly concerned for Teja, she would've sat down Teja and be like, hey, I need to talk to you about something.

I wanna make sure you understand this, not like this like, oh my God. And then Nick did this. And isn't that fun? Isn't that crazy that Nick did this? That Nick was DMing all of us? Yes, he's being city, but she's also, you know, she's also telling the woman like,

your man is fucking around on you, and you're being made an ass out of right now and national television by sewing up here and acting like you're all about him when he's been making you look stupid behind her back. So, I think that's the intention behind it, but I think the way that she's actually doing it is actually a little bit more. I feel like she's, I felt bad for Tasia in that moment because it felt like Bria was trying

more to humiliate Tasia. That's how it came off, even though I do believe her intention was to alert Tasia, what was going on. Well, I think she's trying to humiliate Nick for sure, but knowing she's, she's, she knows she's humiliating her. I mean, that's not cool, but it is a season finale and she is Bria. And that girl has been screwed this whole season by Nick

behind her back, you know? So I don't know, it's like, Bria's wrong a lot, but she's also right a lot. So I'm not really sure where I stand. I feel like there's like a germ of correct, you know, and then it just blows into a crazy tumbleweed of whatever that you're friends you over. Jermy tumbleweed. Yeah. So, um, yeah, Bria's like, you know, if my man is in your, your friends DMs like, let me know please,

because the relationship will be over. Okay, I will be on the next flight to Abu Dhabi to find someone else who's very wealthy. What a weird way to put it. Go on to Abu Dhabi. Yeah, going straight to Abu Dhabi to find another rich guy. But yeah, I mean, this guy is really bad, you know, and I've grown to like everybody on the show but for that guy to be in everybody's DMs and then when he couldn't get anybody pretend that he has a girlfriend or admit that he has a girlfriend all of a sudden

and he wasn't after them in the first place like to save face when he was probably gonna dump his girlfriend if he had to forget. You know what I mean? It's like keeping her on the side, so he didn't look stupid. I mean, that guy's the real jerk, so I don't feel bad for him. Well, Tasia is like, well, Nick has been very forthcoming

about conversations with other girls in the house and he's never given me a reason to think he would step out. And I feel non-alensive doubt in my relationship with Nick, which is my way of saying, I'm not gonna make a scene. I did not apply to Beyond Reality TV. I will yell at him later off camera. Thank you very much.

Yeah. And so, Bri, it's like, oh, okay. Well, let's get him glad then. And Tate's just like, yeah, we're good. So thanks. So then, Silas has dried off and come in a new outfit. Not Silas. Simon. So then Silas and Jasmine are talking. So he's trying to be nice now because he's got

a couple drinks in him and he knows that he went too far. So he's like, hey, do you want, she's eating. And he's like, hey, you need an African. Do you want to use my hand key? She's like, no, I don't want to use your, I don't want to mess up your hand key. Not to be nice, but she's going to have to tie a stick that shit later. I was going to say, and she doesn't need your notes. So you can keep that on yourself. Thank you very much. So she goes, you know, I was talking say and she doesn't need your notes. So you keep that on yourself, thank you very much. So she goes, you know, I was talking to Jordan about how I feel like our gender breakdown and our marriage that works for us blah, blah, blah.

And then it's like, oh, you're talking about the tide pen. And she goes, yeah, the tide pen and the steaming your clothes today. And I was just like, this is just so foolish. And he goes, and she's like, what is happening? And he's like, well, I just want an acknowledgement like, baby, the pan is messed up, the pants are messed up. I just want that to be acknowledged.

And she goes, but it feels like Jasmine is always messing up. And he goes, wow, he just looks at her like, now you got it. That's all I've been trying to say. I'm just saying. And that's all I want to the acknowledgement. And he's like, listen, you know what? I just want you to meet me somewhat in the middle.

Okay, can you just give me a little more? That's all I'm asking for. And she's like, but I'm already hard on myself and then you just add to it and she tells us this trip is highlighted that we're just getting to know each other and we need therapy the second we get back because this is gonna take a lot of work. Yeah, I would say so.

So Jasmine's like, we're just like too early for me to be this exhausted. And he goes, well, you know, we have our routines, but when we're both treating our routines, like it's a necessity and not an option, I think a lot of our issues will be solved. So what I'm trying to say is, let's remove, you know, free thought from our relationship and just robotically it goes to the motions of the things we said we would do during the day and they will be fine, everything will be great. Yeah, it's like serving me is not a hobby, it's a job, man. Okay, and you're gonna do it every fucking day.

And that's it. It's like the mafia, it's like the mafia going up to, going up to a small business and being like, oh, we wouldn't, we would hate for your business to be ransacked. So give us some money. See, if you give us money, everything's okay. If you do everything for me, it'll be amazing.

I'm much better this marriage will be. I will not be complaining and being a big baby and hectoring you and making you feel like a piece of shit. Well, yeah, that's what control is. If you do exactly what I want, you won't get in trouble. So't get in trouble. You know. So then everybody sees them talking and breathe is yelling, Jasmine, you need your back taken. I got your back. And so they all come over and they're trying to cheer them up and dance around and sing and stuff. And Jasmine's like, oh, God, we're trying to sort things out as a cup all. And Preston's like, please, we're leaving tomorrow, okay? But

at the same time, we're all of us are watching this. I don't care where you're leaving tomorrow, okay? But at the same time, we're all of us are, oh, I'm watching this. I don't care where you're going tomorrow. I need to see her fucking break up with Simon, or Silas. I know. Could you please let this go so she can just dump this idiot? I was so mad that they interrupted, actually.

So now, meanwhile, Summer goes up to Alex and she's like, Alex, you did like such a good job tonight and like your friends are so talented, the way they sang about Prussia. I mean, what a country that was. Can you imagine a whole big war? Franco Prussian war happened. Wow. Amazing to think about.

She's like, I really felt things. That was amazing. You make me feel too. And he's like, well, you were a great addition to the house. So you know what? When you get to New York, you can hit me up. I was like, oh, wow, she passed the test. She used all the code words that you like.

They made me feel, you know. It's just how I'm here to love. I'm just here to make people feel, and also make them feel embarrassed about their past by Googling them and then ostracizing them in the house. Yeah. I like people to feel in energy, and that was rhythmic. And so I like that.

I was like, okay, okay. So then Jordan and Amir talking, and he's like, so how are you gonna feel when you get home? And she's like, I'm gonna feel like this. I'm home. That's how journalists, that's how journalists always feel when we get back from some likes. A very literal expression of emotion. And Jordan's like, out of everyone, my friendship with the mirror has blossomed the most through

my time in Martha's Vineyard. Basically once he stopped making me go on kayak trips and hiking and doing stupid things outside, I was very happy when he was just let me enjoy a potato. And so now he's like one of my best friends. Yeah, and she's basically like, he's my friend. And he's like, well, okay, the friend zone I go. And there's been talk online that she's kind of dating or seeing or has seen or something. Is there something going on with Tom Schwartz?

Have you heard this? I have not heard that, but. Are you smoking? No, that was my Dunkin' Donuts. Did it look like a vape? Oh yeah, because you're on a weird green screen right now. I'm gonna look like doing it. Oh yeah, my green screen is being everything like weird.

So I guess my vape, I mean, not mine. Oh, I see why, because the straw is making weird artifacts show up on my first video. Yeah, that's a cool idea. That's a cool idea. Wow, not mine. Oh, I see why because the straw is making weird artifacts show up on my virtual. Yeah. Wow. How weird. Ben's vaping now. Yeah. Now that the tour is over, I can let really that is.

I'm going to vape. Um, so anyway, Tom Schwartz, please don't. Please have some self-respect. Because I feel like, you know, we see, we make fun of everybody on this show, but I feel like you got so much self-respect. I don't tell me. I don't tell me. I'm sure it's to have self-respect. I don't have the chance to have self-respect. I was like, no.

I was like, Jordan, I heard I have self-respect. No, like I'm saying, I make fun of her on the show because she's on this show, but like she is definitely, I mean, I like her. I don't want her to do this. Jordan, please.

Like, don't do it. Yeah, please, don't date Tom Schwartz, please, Jordan, please. Like, literally don't date anyone from Bravo, please don't date Tom Schwartz. Please Jordan. Please like literally don't date anyone from Bravo unless they maybe they're on like top chef. I guess maybe as a judge. I don't know especially like especially Tom Schwartz don't like so. Um, Brea and Simon are talking. Okay, so Brea goes into her room. Milo is still on his leash. She's walking around with this dog. Her emotional support dog. Yeah, her emotional support dog. Yeah.

So by the way, it does a terrible job because emotionally she's still off the fucking charts. I know. I mean, when are we gonna admit that emotional support animals don't really work? Okay, I think now now's some pretty good evidence. Okay. Yeah, at least not in this context. Like in the hospital, absolutely.

People who really need some sure-homes. Yeah, it has a lot of stuff. It in the hospital, absolutely. People who really need some of your homes. Yeah, it is a lot of this. It is a summer show on Marthas Vineyard on a reality show, absolutely not. So she walks up to Simon and she goes, why'd you leave me with Milo? I'm like, it's your emotional support animal allegedly. So shouldn't the emotion, why,

you have to, the animal has to be with you to support you. Okay, that's how it works. That's how your lie works. If you want your lie, if you want people to take your lie seriously, you have to be with you to support you, okay? That's how it works. That's how your lie works. If you want your lie, if you want people to take your lie seriously, you have to be with your dog all the time. So then what is this thing? She said, why are you leaving me alone with Milo? And then he says,

Brea, that's just not an option. And she is like, well hold up, hold up, hold up. Come outside right now. You're bugging. And he's like, I'm on vacation. And she's like, I don't know if you're drunk, but you are not gonna be talking to me like this. And he goes, but your dust respect me.

And then she starts screaming. I disrespect you. You're pinging out. You're bugging out. Get it together. I was like, oh my God, you guys got the worst coke. You got rage coke. You should not be this ragy this early in the night.

That's some bad coke. They are screaming about Milo, because I think it was that he didn't want to take care of my loa he's like not now i want to jump and pull again so they are leaving the dog in the bedroom guys it's okay leave the dog in the bedroom this fucking dog ruining everything all the time so some are like guys guys what's wrong and breathe like well i i said well you watch my loa real quickly while I get up and someone goes but you come to me saying I have to watch Milo and I will do it but you didn't say anything okay it's just well asked will you watch the dog for two seconds no you don't ask me about the dog you just tell me you say why you're not watching the dog that is the difference okay you have to ask me

about the dog which he's right but also now he's yelling what are you talking about he's right but also like can you guys hear what you guys are fighting about right now? Yeah, you're both dummies. And so he's like, why are you not watching the dog? That's what you say. That's the difference. And she goes, okay, then you can just stay outside. Don't come back in the house. He goes, I better stay outside.

I do everything for you. She goes, shut the fuck up. So she goes inside and she just passes someone and goes, Simon needs to go, I don't want him in this house anymore. He's disgusting and disrespectful. I was like, oh my God, you fought for him to be here longer than three days. And of course you're trying to get him kicked out.

Just like, it's like, what is this the third person you're trying to get kicked out? Oh my God. Well, Mariah was the first and then the second, who did they not kick out? They ended up not kicking out. Well, there was the other guy. What was his name, the guy that they kicked out? Joe.

But that wasn't her. That wasn't her. That was far. No. She really backs the wrong courses sometimes. So she's like, he's like, I don't want to watch your fucking dog. He's got to go.

She's just like losing her mind. She's screaming and summer is meanwhile talking to Simon. She goes, you feel disrespected and she feels disrespected. He goes, yes. She goes, and this is like, it's the way that she told you how to wash the dog. He's like, yes. So now Briya is going to Jordan and she's like, he's saying,

I'm treating him like the butler and I'm saying this is whack. No, that's another thing that he did not say, but she is taking it that way because that is how she treats him, you know, you can't have two things. You can't say I want a rich guy who's going to pay for everything and do everything for me. And then I also get to Boston, right? You know, it's like this weird, there's such weird relationships, Dynat, such weird, but relationship dynamics and discussions on this show, because it's Jasmine. You've got Jasmine over there talking about, she even calls it gender roles, which, you know, don't like that, but it's like the woman stays home and does this and the man does this.

And Brea thinks that she could just get some guy and not have, we find out in this episode, I guess I should just wait to get to the moment. But we find out in this episode that this guy basically supports her. And she demands that he watches the dog. You can't have it both ways. You know what I mean?

By the way, Quarco, we find out this episode like, it was evident when you showed up in the Like it's clear that he supports her. I mean look it seems obvious But he always wanted to go to some of the Benny the Benny of the doubt there But you know, and he's been bringing her plates of food this entire he's been doing so much stuff And so Simon's like I'm concentrating to have her back to make everything for her and she's this was betting me like that And I will not take that from her. So Summer is like, what you guys both love each other

and you should be able to have arguments through love. I'm like, oh gosh. Oh, please show up. It was the two-bit songs from Alex. Yeah. So then Jordan Embryod, Jordan's like, okay, so now what should we do? And she goes, and now he's down there talking to Summer because they have a little bond. And she goes, well, yeah,

but isn't her loyalty supposed to be with you? Which Jordan, stop, stop, stop, stop feeding this fire. Yeah. But also thank you because it's a reality show. So thank you, but stop, stop in real life. Yeah. Thank you in our life. So Briya's like,, she's like, well, clearly here loyalty is with Simon. And Bria's like, summer knows not to come between Dick and Pussy. And that's not her thing. She's not a therapist. And let me handle this with Simon. I'm like, wow, you're doing such a great job, so far, Bria.

Yeah, your handling is ruining everyone's mind, again, as usual. So then people are taking pictures and shot. Everybody else is just trying to have fun, right? And Briya pulls Simon to talk, but no, Briya pulls Simon to talk, right? But then she gets to talk. Because you're being wild. But then she gets to talk, call from her mom.

And she's like, mom, he has boundaries with me. He jumped in the pool with his clothes on. Mom, it's not funny. Where are you laughing? Mom, I'm boundaries with me. He jumped in the pool with his clothes on. Mom, it's not funny. Where are you laughing? Mom, I'm embarrassed right now. She's like, has he been drinking? She's like, no, he's been, yeah, he's been a pool mom. Stop, stop.

Why are you laughing at me, mom? Because basically, by the way, it's like a spoiled brat. Okay, she's a spoiled brat. So she's calling mom to title. And mom is like just laughing. Because she's gotten this call a million times With every boyfriend, you know, she's like, oh my god

So then it cuts to Simon who literally is out of control I mean, I would be annoyed if he was my boyfriend too. I was you stand down the kitchen counter You know dancing like doing a pelvis dance like pumping the air and like doing Saturday night fever moves and just making an ass out of himself. And so, Bria's like, he's putting on a persona that's not even him. And I'm like, there are boundaries, there are boundaries. And the mom goes, um, he's been supporting you, right? Because, well, but he's not respecting me.

She's like, do not embarrass him, Bria. Please don't make me send you any more money. I've got to retire soon. Okay. You found someone to pay your damn bills. I've got to retire soon. Okay, you found so much to pay your damn bills Let him dance on a table. Okay, she's like I don't embarrass him Don't embarrass him. Okay, all I do is say that he is this piece of shit for not handling my low Okay, and there's boundaries that should not be crossed and somebody goes That's what's back to me because he's like there. Cause there's like a lot of chaos happening.

And he's like, shut up. I'm talking to my mom. Shut the fuck up and let me talk to my mom. So then summer comes up and she goes, don't you come in here. I don't want anyone coming into my room. And summer's like, are you done for the night? Like, what's going on with you?

She goes, I don't want anyone in my room. Your fake is fuck. Get the fuck away from my door. She goes, don't talk to me like that. And she goes, get out of my room, get out of my room. And someone's like, I still talk to you. You know how many times I stuck up for you? And she starts getting her finger in the face.

You were with my man downstairs. You were with my man. You were with my man. And then summer just goes in and pushes her, like straight up, pushes her down. And she just like pushes her. And then there just like pushes her and then there's like screaming and then there's people, there's producers pulling them apart and there's intervention and Milo is barking.

Milo finally does something on this show. He starts to bark like way to go Milo, you're really, really coming to her protection there, although he's not a watch dollar or protector. So then summer's like, fuck. And then people, like three people are holding Bria back like Bria's flailing She's screaming. She's angry and Jordans like telling her like stop. You know stop like you're so much better than the shit stop And the Simon just goes downstairs

He's actually he's already been downstairs and he's like making himself a little bit in the basement Yeah, and so Marlos just like And I think he's kind of mad because there's so much movement that all he sees is a shiny snake on Brias dress because she's wearing this dress with like a stuffed snake on it, which is weird, we didn't even mention that. It's not just like an image of a snake. It's like a stuffed glittered snake

like coming down her dress. And I think myelogist sees a toy because I don't think we've seen Vrea having a fit before. Myelot doesn't even care. He's just like relaxing or like playing. So I think he's just trying to get the toy off of her chest. And then Nick is telling Tasia, he's like, oh God, that's Vrea. This place is so fucking toxic sometimes. So that Bria, of course, not Bria's crying. And she's like, I'm tired of people putting their hands on me. Like, okay, all right, well, the obligatory obviously violence

does not the answer. And obviously summer should not have pushed Bria. But of course Bria, who is like being so ridiculous and being so over the top and everyone's just trying to have fun. And she's being, she's being screaming, she's crying, she's being really mean to her friend and then all of a sudden, like, they're putting her hands on,

everyone just wants to put their hands on me. I'm like, I don't know, this is, to me, this is a major dramatization of what people go through, shit that's much worse than having a drama, you know what people go through Shit that's much worse than having a friend push you because they're tired of you being crazy to them Not yeah, and then they said the Mariah clips you and Mariah I mean she put the like she put the laundry on her chest, but she wasn't like oh, you know Yeah, it's just come on for youya. I just feel like Priya is definitely using

um She's basically speaking in a way that I think devalues um, you know much worse stuff, but I mean, I don't know It's the 20s also campus somebody you can't push someone's what's the one subject in it's not summer was on the wrong In the one just back the fuck away She's telling you to get out of her room and she's in her own room She's not even like in a public space and Summer's like barging herself and they're getting in it just get out of the room Just walk away from the from the crazy, you know, yeah

So then Alex is talking to Summer because she's upset so she's sitting on the bed And he's like are you all right? I mean, she's done that to pretty much everybody at the house You know and the first few times it happened at her right here That's where my heart is. That's where my heart is. That's where my heart is. That's the heart. Yeah. And she's like, I'm upset that she got it. She got under my skin because I know my intent and it was to create peace. For her to come into my face, I mean, you should not be so close to someone's face that I can smell your dinner. She was wrong. You were wrong. You were wrong for pushing her.

And now you just made it that Bria is less wrong than you because you did that. Shouldn't have done that. No, she never pushed. Never pushed. So Silas is, meanwhile, Silas is telling Jasmine, take care of your friend. She's literally been invited by us.

The texts won't do. And Jasmine goes, I actually don't care. Yeah, shut up. Silas, you go take care of it then, big man. Big man on campus. Fucking Silas. So Bria care of it then, big man, big man on campus. Fucking Silas. So, Priya's like, she's talking to Preston and Jordan and Amir and she's like, being upstairs,

someone's trying to fight me. Someone wants my man, pulls my man aside, my man's downstairs, she's not my man anymore. I don't feel anything for him. I'm like, okay, you know what, Priya? I've had enough. I've had enough, go to sleep at this point, please. So then we see Jasmine and Silas in bed.

So Silas is like, so do you want me to be honest right now? She's like, I don't really wanna hear anything from you right now. How about that? And then there's a drama chord. And he's like, first of all, you're not talking to your husband like that. She's like, oh my God, the way you've been talking to me on this trip, just stop, just stop. And he's like, you're not talking to your husband like that. She's like, oh my God, the way you've been talking to me on this trip, just stop.

Just stop. And he's like, you're not talking to your husband like that. You calm down because when we're good, I'm gonna bring this shit up that you disrespect. Yes, we know. Okay, you're the fucking, you're on the line with customer service until you get the agent's response that you need. We know, Silas.

Yeah, so she's like, okay, well, you wanna bring it up right now? Let's bring it up right now. So Silas goes, you should respect to me. And she goes, I have time. Come on, tell me everything. And he goes, you literally just said, I don't wanna hear shit from you right now.

That is flat out disrespectful. I'm like, didn't you just say to her, I don't know if you wanna hear this right now or not? And she said, I don't wanna hear it. And I'm like, how't you just say to her, I don't know if you want to hear this right now or not? And she said, I don't want to hear it. And they're like, how could you even say that? So then, Masalus is like, I mean, that coverage, that coverage that comes with marriage, I promise you.

I promise you your life will change. I promise your life will change tomorrow. What are you selling marriage insurance? What the fuck am I talking to? I'm just like, I'm the marriage Jake from State Farm. Shut the fuck up about coverage. Yeah, what are you talking about?

He's ridiculous. He's like, you follow the rules, you follow the rules, and that is the most freedom you're ever gonna have. Get that shit the fuck outta here. And then the most insulting thing of all is that of course, Nick and Alex didn't even provide any food for their big blowout because press in a mirror in Jordan

are just like sitting in the room at night and they're just like, we're really hungry. And none of them have had dinner yet because there was no food. There was food. There was? Well, they didn't eat anything. Yeah, there was food.

So I saw it. And I was like, I want food. So I just remember thinking that I want food. Why do they always eat? They have was food. So I saw it. And I was like, I want food. So I just remember thinking that I want food. Why do they always eat to have good food? Well, those three did not have dinner. So someone feed them. Well, Preston's always in bed eating. That's why I love Preston.

You can find Preston at any time of day in bed eating something. I love that. I can't. There's been a strong theme of mac and cheese every episode, which makes me so hungry every single time. So then, Jasmine's like, so you just respected me on this trip.

Do you even know how? I mean, my friends are sitting right there talking about how you can't fold your own laundry. You can't do shit. You know, and I didn't make it's hand from about being disrespected. I said, guess what? I'm an adult and I know when did disengage from a conversation when it was pointless. So I'm going to wash my hands at this conversation because you're doing a lot tonight. So good night. And he's just on the floor packing his suitcase like, I'm so man. Oh wow, look at you. So mad that

you're actually doing something for yourself. I know. That's something. Wow. I guess we figured out how to make you work. Seriously. So now it's the morning and everyone's waking up and Simon sort of like moaps his way back upstairs to get back into bed with Brea. And then Amir just like hugs a few people and he's like, yeah, this is a great summer. And then he's just like gone.

He's like done for the season. Like it was weird. I'm here goodbye, wasn't it? Yeah, I feel like Amir was like a pretty big character on the season. Yeah, they just canceled a mirror. It's like, okay, bye, bye, mirror. Yeah, I think they just were like, bye, it's like the end of, it's like the end of your

moment on Bachelor when you don't win and he was being a good sport about it and just getting into limo and leaving instead of making a big drama, but it's like he didn't win the girl. So just kick him out, no one has any use for him anymore. So then we go to Ba and Simon and Brea, now we know this is like Coke shame because the next day Brea is like, what the hell, I'm not kicking out the watch person

and the person who buys me all of this stuff and pays all of my bills. So she's like, okay, she's trying to be tough where she's like making it tough, but she goes, okay, last night was rough. That's why I'm wearing sunglasses inside, okay? But you know, I fought for you to come here. I ride for you hardcore because I got you

a three days at this house that we were. And he's like, but you pushed me to the limit and you just respected me and she goes, that's fair. We both just respected each other. Actually, I just can want to say that. And now, how do you want to move forward? Yeah. That's how you know that he knows he's wrong. When he's like, okay, we disrespected each other. I was like, oh, see, gave an inch. I'm like, see, knows she was just flat out wrong. And that's interesting. Yeah. So he's like, I want to let it go. And so they both agreed to let it go.

And Ria's like, I was ready to throw my relationship away, but I slept on it. And Simon is willing to do anything for you and like give this sweater off your back, which by the way, I don't know what that means. He's like, oh, nice sweater. I'm going to take it off your back and give it to you. It's like, I think she means like,

he'll take the sweater from around his shoulders and give it to you. I'm like guys on the on my line on the up. You know what? That's what I should be focusing on, that he will pay for things for me. In other words, it's easier than getting a job. So they kiss. Then Summer Knox for Breed to talk and you know their friends I guess so they decide that they're gonna be just gonna get over it.

And summer's like okay I was in your business, you're right, I should not have been in your business and I love you and I love you and I care about you even when I'm mad. So they're fine. Yeah, they're fine. So then Jasmine is telling Jason that she's really happy to leave Martha's Vineyard because she just can't deal with another fight in this household. And Jason's like, how are things with Silas? And she says that Silas packed all his stuff last night, but just because he needed something to do.

And she just doesn't really feel connected with the man that she fell in love with, but she really hopes that they tune into each other more and that way they can let everyone else solve their problems without. They just want to just focus on themselves. So then everybody has to sign the book because it's like the good bye book. It's in you say, dear Martha,

you say what you're grateful for. And Jordans like dear Martha, thanks say what you're grateful for. And Jordan's like to your Martha, thanks for the last and the big ol' crocodile tears Martha. And I'm sorry, but we're just going to be friends. And I'm like, I've been in playboy, we can talk about it on the gals now. Okay, Martha. Thanks. Hey, Martha, thanks for surrounding me with a bunch of asshole pigs and Alex is like, he was a really big mirror this summer, really big mirror being put in front of you having these

big personalities in one big house, but I wouldn't change anything for a world, for the world, because guess what, guess what I have? I'm hard. That's where my heart lives. It's where my heart lives. Also, how does- I don't understand what he's saying. This place where my heart lives. It's where my heart lives. Also, how does... I don't understand what he's saying. This place was like a big mirror that's on you, having personality smiles. I don't really know what that means. I guess because they're telling him how he is.

He just drinks along phrases. Because if these personalities were telling him how he is, he would have a shred of introspection, but we have not seen that. You know. So then, um, Silas is telling us, you know, it's here that I asked Jasmine to be my girlfriend and it's here that she came back as my wife with a broken tied pen finger. So we're going to have to work on that one. And Jasmine just says she's exhausted and they're going to have to go home and look each other in the eye and start all over again. Unless you're ready to go back home and start all over again, doing his to-do list exactly

how he wants it every day, you're on the wrong relationship, man. Start all over again on those divorce papers. Yeah. Get rid of him. Chalk this up to a mistake and I hope you see yourself on TV and realize that you made a big one. You made a big one. Run. Yeah, I don't think that there's any reunion for this show, but man, I actually really would have liked one. I really would have liked one just to have

Silas confronted with his own buffoonery. But either way, what a great first season loved this show. So good. Sorry, it's over. Yeah, fun season. Look, I thank you, Bobo, for this one. Really enjoyed this show. It was fun one. And that leaves an opening, which will be filled by the real housewives of New York City. So that's coming up next. But we will be back next week. We're off, but we're not going to be here, but we're still going to have plenty of stuff. We have a live show coming out. We have a bunch of stuff coming up. So still tune in to watch what crap ends, but we'll be back with the new season of Real Housewives of New York in place of this in a couple of weeks. So we'll talk to you guys then. Thank you so much for being with us all season. Just remember, okay? We love you guys.

Okay. Yeah. Bye. Bye. for being with us all season, just remember. Okay, we love you guys, okay? Yeah. Bye. Bye. Watch what crap ends with like to think it's premium sponsors. Ain't no thing like Allison King. Ashley Savoni, she don't take no baloney. She's not just a Sheila, she's a Daniela.

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Or you can listen Add Free with Wondry Plus in Apple Podcasts before you go tell us about yourself by completing a short survey at Wondry.com slash survey. Raising kids can be one of the greatest rewards of a parent's life. But come on, someday, parenting is unbearable. I love my kid, but is a new parenting podcast from Wondry that shares a refreshingly honest and insightful take on parenting. Hosted by myself, Megan Galey, Chris Garcia, and Kurt Brown-Oller, we will be your resident not-so-expert experts. Each week we'll share a parenting story that'll have you laughing, nodding, and thinking, oh yeah, I have absolutely been there.

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