Watch What Crappens - Summer House: Rumble in the Jungle

Episode Date: May 24, 2023

The season finale of Summer House (S07E15) climaxes with Lindsay and Danielle's clash... but also a dash of cheating from Oliver!!Watch the recap here: https://www.patreon.com/posts/83451527S...ee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Hey, Prime members, you can listen to watch what crap ends at free on Amazon Music. Download the app today. This episode is sponsored by Uber1. We've all used Uber for rides, and I love using UberEats for food delivery. Okay, hello. I mean, I kind of live off of it. But have you ever heard about Uber1? Uber1 is a membership that helps you save on Uber and UberEats. With an Uber-1 membership, you get exclusive member perks, like up to 10% off UberEats and a $0 delivery fee on eligible orders. It just makes sense. I'm always getting Uberes.
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Starting point is 00:02:38 just love to talk about. I'm Ben Mandelker and joining me today is the one and only hilarious and generous. Mr. Ronnie Carram, hi Ronnie, or are you? Well, hello, Benoons, what's she doing today, baby? I'm in the process of still waking up many hours after I actually got up. So that's what today's all about. That's what we're doing. But you know what though, I'm excited.
Starting point is 00:03:01 We're talking about Summer House Season finale today, which had a big blowoutup fight with Lindsay and Danielle plus a smack a smack of scandival to it in the scandivaliver, you know, so we're gonna get into all that stuff. We are presenting to you today on video as we do every day almost every day I should say and if you want to watch the videos, well, guess what? You can watch them go to patreon.com slash watch for crap and get access to our videos day, almost every day I should say. And if you want to watch the videos, well, guess what?
Starting point is 00:03:25 You can watch them go to patreon.com slash watch for crap and get access to our videos. If you support with crap, it's on demand where they'll be on Patreon exclusively as soon as the videos are done. We post them on there and then they stay there for a week and then they go up to YouTube. So then they become available to everyone. So if you want to get early access while you're still fired up about things like the fight in tonight's episode, go to Patreon. You also get access to our weekly bonus episode. It's set Shra. Also, we're coming towards the end of May, which is exciting, crazy also, crazy that we're at the end of May. But in June, the tour revs up again for the final stretch. So we're going to San
Starting point is 00:04:06 Diego, St. Paul, Minnesota, Chicago, Columbus, and then Boston. And then we close it all out at Foxwoods in Connecticut. Six shows left and after that, the tour is done, done and over. So come join, come join. We have, we've been having so much fun this year. It's a really thrilling experience to be in a room with all of your people and Like it's hard to explain what that energy is like so rather than me explain it just come and experience it for yourself So go to watch your crappens.com to get your tickets and that's all that's all the exciting news. I have to I have to report for today Only losers don't come. Don't be a loser. Ronnie, we're matching shirts.
Starting point is 00:04:46 Did you eat, why don't we always, just boys happen. Oh, I love it. We're like, teal sisters. Oh yeah, I guess our teal backdrop. But we're, I've got one of those little Paul Frank shirts on. Love a monkey and he's holding the earth. Okay, because it's like an earth day shirt from Old Navy. Guys, Old Navy believes in protecting the earth, okay? Because it's like an Earth Day shirt from Old Navy, guys.
Starting point is 00:05:05 Old Navy believes in protecting the earth, okay? Also, South labor. I'm sure all the children that they employ really respect the earth as well. So I'd like to thank all those children working at Old Navy. Thanks, you're doing a great job. Love Paul Frank.
Starting point is 00:05:19 Yeah, Paul Frank's to cry. I'm covering mine. I've got a little bit of a J-Crew kind of ging-him sort of covering my teal in record. But the truth is we're both in kind of summary colors because it's Summer House time. It's the season finale. It's Summer House time.
Starting point is 00:05:36 I was very excited because it's the season finale. Ben and I do not agree on a lot of things happening on this show, which leads people to think, we're fighting, which we're not fighting. But God, you know, we disagree sometimes and we can still be friends and disagree, okay? But it's very stressful because then you have to explain like no, we're not disagreeing and then like seeing people be like, hey Ben, fuck you, if you're a stupid ideas and they'll be like, yeah, Ronny, fuck you, if you're stupid ideas. I'm like,
Starting point is 00:05:59 you guys, fuck all of you guys, we're all idiots because we all watch some house. Seriously. Let's watch some our house. So why don't we just all bond over the fact that we're wasting our lives on dumb-doms, drunk 40-year-olds, okay, that's what we're watching. It's just all calm down. I know, seriously. Yeah, there was a very angry YouTube comment
Starting point is 00:06:17 about me last night, like, Ben, are you gusing me? Gusing us? No, I'm not. But the thing is this though, I think we're actually gonna be pretty aligned in this episode because, well, you'll see, I'm not. But the thing is this though, I think we're actually gonna be pretty aligned in this episode because, well, you'll see, I think you will be surprised. I feel like we'll be two rulers aligned
Starting point is 00:06:31 next to each other on this. Well, I have to say, I'm very excited. It's a season finale, right? So I'm watching it, getting furious, just like you're supposed to do, getting bored, because it somehow is just like you're supposed to do. I feel like the film is a content in the show.
Starting point is 00:06:46 Yeah, nothing happens. But I was feeling all the things I feel like I was supposed to be feeling. And then the preview for the reunion, giving them one. And it just reminded me that it's a month of horrible, horrible screaming at each other and more fighting because it's going all the way back to the fights from the beginning of the season. And I'm starting to feel like a Bravo character.
Starting point is 00:07:10 Like someone who's like, oh my God, we made up, we started agreeing about something and now we have to go relive all of those fights again. So there, that's how I'm feeling. It's going to be a lot, you know, like June, we are traveling more than ever in June, and then we are gonna be dealing with three separate toxic reunions between Vanderpump, New Jersey, and this show all at once. Like I'm, by the time we get to Fox Woods,
Starting point is 00:07:38 I am going to be a dried corn husk. Like I'm just gonna be just a floppy, a floppy corn year with some string attached and I'll be with a mic. Cause that's all that's gonna be left of me. I'm going to turn into a piece of corn and not even the part that you eat. You know, it's just, it's so much, but that being said, the trailer for the reunion
Starting point is 00:07:56 for this looked good. Like there were definitely a few moments where I would, you know, like I gasped. I mean like, I mean, when Paige said that, Carl and Lindsay didn't even have a job. She mean like, I mean, when Paige said that Carl and Lindsay didn't even have a job, she's like, I don't, but Lindsay said, when Lindsay said like, I'm in the series. This is like an expensive line.
Starting point is 00:08:13 She goes, I know, and that's what's confusing, because in your view, you have a job, I literally cracked up. It was such a caddy thing to say, but I laughed, because I'm like that. Anybody on summer house throwing that stone is a sore to me. Yeah. But I can't say that about Paige because she does have a job. She does work quite a lot.
Starting point is 00:08:33 She's got one of the biggest podcasts in the country, the Giggly Squad. And she's Amazon-living in. I mean, Paige just has a lot of stuff. Paige has a lot. She also did, did she do mechala, fashion, commentary for E, but also had Craig there with her, which was a strange choice.
Starting point is 00:08:49 I have to think out, and I'm like, if that was a big deal for her, I'm sorry to take away from you because I'm sure that was really cool to get to do, but Melissa Gorga was there. Oh, sorry. You're right. Disqualified.
Starting point is 00:09:00 You were disqualified from putting that on your CV. Okay. Okay, well anyway, anyway, we'll welcome to Summer House. We're not bad at each other. Headline is, Ronnie and I are not mad at each other and we argue about these fools, but we have literally no impact
Starting point is 00:09:15 like how we feel about each other. It's like- We fight over important things. Like, why would you make me sit in the middle seat? Those are our fights. I mean, Ronnie do that once and I- You're never gonna forget it. At your funeral, if you die before me, God, that's stark.
Starting point is 00:09:28 But if you do, I'm gonna show up there and I'm gonna be like, Ben was my best friend. Also, he made me sit in the middle seat once to fuck that guy and then I'm gonna like flick your coffin and watch everybody gasp. I am a little surprised that I booked you a middle seat. Like, I actually don't know what I was thinking. Like, why would anyone do that?
Starting point is 00:09:44 Like, I don't know. I honestly don't know what I was thinking. Like why would anyone do that? Like I don't know. I honestly don't know why I did that Ronnie to this day. I was still the nice octopus at that point. You had never seen the tentacles come out and me start threatening the world around me. You hadn't seen my Earth to Leckamount, darling. I think I just had this weird idea that like when you know each other,
Starting point is 00:09:58 when you know that the two people next to each other know each other, middle seat isn't so bad because there's not as much like personal space nervousness, because you're like, oh, if Ronnie's elbow hits me, it's like fine. But like, if it's like a stranger, you feel like you can't do that.
Starting point is 00:10:15 And so I think that must have been what I was thinking. Well, you said you wanted to sit together, which was really sweet. So I said, okay, then you sit in the middle seat and I'll sit in the window and you said, no, I've got really? Yeah. I was passed such a bitch. Why? Because then we saw, we saw a listener on the plane. They were sitting with us. He was so sweet. He looked like Chris and Cereano. Yeah. He was sweet, the sweet guy. And I was like, well, you switch seats with me and he's like, no, what am I an idiot? No, I'm
Starting point is 00:10:42 not going to switch seats with you. I can't believe that. I can't believe I didn't take the middle seat. Like that's shocking. You totally, Tom, shorts me. I was Katie, you went to first class and you left me in Cotes, coming back from Mexico. That is shocking. I guess what? I apologize.
Starting point is 00:10:57 Now that was throwing your friend onto the bus. So I just did. Oh, my people are really going to be happy. Wait, but that's funny. But like, but you know, like there's one, if there's some things you get thrown under a bus and everyone, all the buy centers are horrified and they're traumatized after go to therapy.
Starting point is 00:11:10 But like, if you were through, like, I don't know, like a, like a, one of those used car floppy things throw that under a bus and it gets run over. Everyone would cheer and it's funny. And I feel like them, right now in this case, it's a funny flop. I'm a funny floppy thing. I got run over and it's funny. We're all laughing. Oh, I love you Okay, so let's get into it. So we start where we left
Starting point is 00:11:34 Where basically I was furious last week because I was like Lindsay and Carl just quit the show Like to me walking off set and just leaving and Carl coming in and cursing and covering up the cameras To me, walking off set and just leaving and Carl coming in and cursing and covering up the cameras, just because someone had the nerve to not be a hundred percent celebratory over his stupid engagement, which he sold to every outlet in the world, including fucking marshals,
Starting point is 00:11:54 which doesn't even an outlet. Like these two are making, like, such, these two are so star fucking for this engagement. It got on my nerves that you're quitting the actual job that gave you. I mean, I was furious. I was still furious after the episode when I knew they came back to the house. I was still furious.
Starting point is 00:12:10 But now we are graced with their presence as they come back to the house to finish what they started. Oh, and I owe a huge apology. I feel like we have to do this every single week. Every single week it's a huge apology. I feel like we have to do this every single week. Every single week it's a huge apology. I took my foot in my mouth again. I know I've said a lot of people, I just came from a place of just not thinking about the words coming out my mouth. Carl and Enzy were driving a Kia Telluride, not a Kia Cerencio. I apologize to everyone. The record has been fixed. Yes. Wow, some Kia. That was some Kia slander. Yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:12:46 I'm so sorry about it, but I'm living in learning. Good in New Ronde. I feel like Kia's that car who got those Zempik and nobody will be nice to the car because I know it's taking those Zempik because Kia's used to be like dorky cars. And then now people, like I was talking to my niece and I'm parking a lot, we were just standing out
Starting point is 00:13:03 after lunch talking. And I was like, oh yeah, Ben has a Kia and he loves this Kia. It's like, it's a Kia. And I went, no, look, they're cool now. Look at that Kia. And she looks, she goes, oh my God, that is cool now. Oh my God, I love that I have a nose epic.
Starting point is 00:13:16 They're wrinkle. It's totally true. Yeah, but she still had that tint of like, but it had, she had the, she said, but I still have the old Kia logo in my mind. And I was like, you see, this is how people treat people who take those. I'm like, they can't be happy for the Kia for the new brand. They feel like it's not fair.
Starting point is 00:13:33 You just slapped a new sticker on it. I'm like, no, it's a cool car. Kia is the original TikTok car. In that, it was so easy to steal. It became a TikTok challenge to steal cues. It's a great badge of honor. I love TikTok. I tried to make meat flowers a thing there this week.
Starting point is 00:13:54 I love that. Oh, they'll catch on. I don't want a million of views from my meat flowers post and it didn't work. You know what, I'm going to keep trying. No, because you didn't use a sing-songy voice. You didn't say, hey guys, you ever see a meat flower? And they look really hard, but it's actually really easy. I'll tell you when 35 easy steps. No, because I had my mom doing it. I was like, Mom, show everybody how to make a meat fire. And she was moving
Starting point is 00:14:16 so slow, just like slapping salami over it. I was like, we don't have, it's tick tock. You don't have 30 minutes. Would you just slap the salami on the goddamn shot glass and be just anywhere. She would listen. Point is we're recapping summer house. Let's get Talk you don't have 30 minutes. Would you just slept the salami on the goddamn shot glass and be Anyway, sure listen point is we're recapping summer house. Let's get to it. We're in minute 12 We are in minute 12. I'll talk about tiktok. Okay, so Lindsay and Carler back in their Kia tell your ride where they have not Just made some meat cups in their off day and they walk in very slowly tiktck tick tock and Carl's like oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh Holy crap, holy crap, boo, bro. And so they're just acting like nothing happened, right? Let's do this again.
Starting point is 00:15:07 Yeah. And Carl, Lindsay, so, Carl is like the dad confronting kids who are in trouble, like they just came home really late, and they got in trouble, and they're pretending that nothing's wrong. He's like, so you're actually back now? Yeah, I don't think he's going.
Starting point is 00:15:26 Yeah, everything's brain. We just need to kinda get out, not I mean. And Kyle's like, well, that was fun, but I'm glad you guys are here now. Well, I guess I'm gonna shower, but I'm glad you came, even though I'm really disappointed in you kids. Really disappointed in you.
Starting point is 00:15:40 Yeah, well, I'm really appreciative. For me personally, I just, for being supportive and trying to understand, like, I'm really appreciative. Like for me personally, I just like for like being supportive and like trying to understand like it means a lot like it's really been much like really hard, you know, and I'll say, well, I hope in the moment you realize I'm just trying to help you see the other side and like in the perfect world, it all be in full alignment. And I was like, yeah, well, last week just like really cut me to my core. Yeah, like in fact like
Starting point is 00:16:11 Like that like that it made like I was made out to be like the bad guy for this reason like my core I was like like giver. It was like someone opened up a Ben and Jerry's like I screamed with a core inside it and like stabbed it. It was like that's how I felt like you know What would you come into the core when you know? I've been working so hard on my core Barry's book. I'm like every Saturday I've been using my amorphical my amorphical shirt. I've been working so hard on my core Barry's book. It's been like over a Saturday. I've been using my amorphous shirt. My amorphous shirt. I've been using it to like get my core up and ready. Love that Carl's like yeah, I appreciate oh so much support in the trash alley Kyle. So much support from you my best friend before you went and told everyone what the little
Starting point is 00:16:41 bitch Carl was and then talk shit with everybody after you left. Yeah, Carl's just a real stand up winner of a friend, the season to you, buddy. So then Lindsay's like, yeah, you got to act like it is something wrong. And Carl's like, yeah, broken. I was brother. I just needed some space. You don't get space. Okay, sir, you're on summer house and you're not doing anything.
Starting point is 00:17:03 You're like the most boring person ever the past two seasons, okay? And I'm not being mean to you because you're sober. I'm just saying you're so, you're boring. I don't care if it's because you're sober. And I really don't care why. I don't care about the why. This isn't a court of law. You've just been very boring and you need to do more.
Starting point is 00:17:18 So you can't just leave. Okay, you need to stay there and fight. That's what you're getting paid to do. Now get a stain stick for those fucking white jeans and get back to work. Also Okay, I understand Your bummed out that like you feel like your friends aren't happy for you or whatever, but he's literally Acting as if someone broke into his house and like like murdered all his pets still all his goods
Starting point is 00:17:44 Chopped Wesleypes in half. It's fine, it's fine. Like this whole, I was like broken into like a million pieces as well. I was a broken man on like, I was tears were coming down my cheeks for five straight days. Like they weren't, I don't say they weren't. You, like you have your mother's commercial.
Starting point is 00:18:00 You're like 40 dude. Yeah, yeah. So I was like, well I know why you kind of like snowballed it because it like became a bigger deal. And I wish it was because like when you weren't there, I couldn't help but like gossip to the whole house. And then we all talked about doing everything. So I guess if you were here, like we wouldn't have done that.
Starting point is 00:18:15 So it's kind of your fault that we gossiped. I'm just like, I mean, totally, I'm like 100%. But like at the same time, I his mental house is most important thing. And he wanted to get away on a like a hundred percent, but like at the same time I his mental health is most important thing and he wanted to get away on like a Friday night, and you know I we got away and he's like oh yeah This summer seems to be a constant questioning about how I'm acting or if I'm changing or if I'm doing the right thing I've just had enough Carl every season you've been on is about your behavior It's questioning of your behavior and whether or not you're changing. You are one of the inventors of the Carl 1.0 2.0 3.0
Starting point is 00:18:50 4.0, you are on Carl. What year is this? Seven? This year, seven? You know, Carl 7.0, Carl. We've been questioning it the whole time. Stop your fucking crying, Carl. At this point, Apple is trying to catch up to you
Starting point is 00:19:04 with all your new versions. Apple's like, we're falling behind in the tech race. Carl's already up fortunately, um, one more update, and I'm not going to be able to charge anymore, so I just really needed to get some time away. Oh! Hey, C.R.A. That's my new operating system. Carl's C.R.A.
Starting point is 00:19:20 Um, so he's like, he's like, y'all, it's just like a Michael Dornigen now for things the best I can. Luckily my kid does come with like a great GPS system. And it just like means like taking a little break for the night like so be it. But like I want to come back and like show my face and like fulfill my obligation to Marshall's to show off this cool shirt I got for free that I told him about where this he's in the finale. So here I am. Thank you for saying that because told him about where I was. He's vanilla. So you're, yeah.
Starting point is 00:19:45 Thank you for saying that because he was talking about how much he's learned and how much he's changed. I'm like, you're wearing a t-shirt version of a member's only jacket. You've learned nothing. So, then drop the monologue. So it's important for me to come back and show my face because I'm proud.
Starting point is 00:20:00 I'm like, it's not because I'm proud because Lindsay made you. Lindsay, and we know that. Lindsay made him, I mean, she even says later on that on the drive over call was a mess and so proud. I'm like, it's not because the price because Lindsay made you. Lindsay, and we know that. Lindsay made him, I mean, she even says later on that on the drive over call was a mess and so angry. It was like, no, Lindsay's like, you're not gonna take me away from us, you have an alley? So yeah, she's like, you might not need this anymore.
Starting point is 00:20:16 I still need this. You get your ass back to the house in front of the camera. What's the point of me telling off these B words if it's just in the car? I want to tell them off on camera. I've waited all season for this. Get me back there. Are you happy with family feud?
Starting point is 00:20:28 Don't you ever aspire for something like celebrity dictionary? Come on, we're doing this season finale. So Kyle's like, well, I don't know how you guys feel about like having a conversation with some people. I don't know, like maybe, Daniel. And then he's like, I'm fine to talk to her. I don't know like maybe Daniel and Lindsay like um I'm fine to talk to her I don't know about Carl he might like poop his white pants because he's
Starting point is 00:20:49 like a total Freddy ham but I can feel it. It's like well I would encourage you to have a chat earlier than later. Why? Daniel's done nothing but go around the house crying and making scenes with everybody you but your ass Lindsay is gonna be talking to her. Well no Kyle's just like yeah do it sooner than later so we then we all have stuff to talk crying and making scenes with everybody. You bet your ass, Lindsay is gonna be talking to her. Well, though, Kyle's just like, yeah, do it sooner than later.
Starting point is 00:21:07 So, we then we all have stuff to talk about on Chez Lamb just for the rest of the episode, okay? You're right. The only other thing happening in this is an inflatable tiger that I'm wearing. In a moment. Exactly. So, meanwhile, Corey is putting on a fake tattoo
Starting point is 00:21:20 and Sam's like, oh my God, literally, I said to him, like, don't you dare put tattoos on your body because I will become uncontrollable. Like, it'll be like fucking a montage times 10 billion. Can you even imagine? He's like, it's so hot. Like, the way that he put the tattoos,
Starting point is 00:21:39 like, I'm gonna fuck him right now. I'm gonna fuck him, yeah. And then Daniel's like, to move her face like that. What's funny? fucking like right now. I'm gonna fuck up. Yeah. And then Daniel's like, move her face like that. What? What's funny? What's funny is that like,
Starting point is 00:21:51 I mean, okay, I can't stand Cory, but he's hot. Like, I see he's hot. And I'll say, I think he's hot. Doofy looking like a hot cartoon. Like a hot person if Matt Groaning draw through him.
Starting point is 00:22:04 Yeah, I mean like the Simpson's face hot Yeah, I it's like I'm you know what it is. He's almost like When people do weird like hot fan thick art of cartoons. They take a cartoon and make them hot like a hot like a hot Launchpad McQuack, you know You know which I'm sure Google it. I'm sure it's there If you're a hiring you know what it's like to deal with economic uncertainty and now more than ever It's really important to hire the right people faster and more efficiently because you got to keep the overall cost down and thankfully There's a hiring partner who's focused on you and your needs and that is zippercrooter from pricing to technology
Starting point is 00:22:53 Everything that zippercrooter does is for you and what works best for you and right now You can try them free at zipracrooter.com slash crap ins No, here's how zippercrooter prioritizes your needs. They've got very straightforward pricing, like no surprises, no twists and turns. Zippercrooter's smart technology identifies the best matches for your job. Hire the best with the help of a partner
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Starting point is 00:23:44 Go on. Plants are meat. And not only are they meat, they're delicious, especially if they're from impossible foods. They taste like beef. Exactly. Impossible is making meat history this summer. Yeah, they are.
Starting point is 00:23:57 Summer of impossible. I am so excited to be spending time, cooking my summer foods, all that good stuff, and guess what? We can use impossible sausages, impossible brats. I mean, it's gonna be a great summer for impossible foods. Impossible beef is made from plants and 19 grams of protein per serving, and it's better for the planet. And it's meat. Plant meat. Correct. So if you're looking for something to grab for your grill, grab some impossible beef. Summer of impossible. Start making
Starting point is 00:24:24 meat history today, just head over to the meat aisle at your local grocery store, grab some impossible beef. Summer of impossible. Start making meat history today. Just head over to the meat aisle at your local grocery store, grab some impossible beef or patties and get grilling. But anyway, but she's putting on these tattoos, like these tattoos on his chest, and it does look good, you know? It's like he's like muscular and everything, and Sam's like, yes!
Starting point is 00:24:44 And then Danielle's like, I know, like sometimes, when I look at Robert's one-tatted leg, I'm like, mm, I'm like, mm, I'm sorry, it's not the same. I'm not gonna, I just don't feel like we can elevate Robert's strange calf up to Corey's like, because you know it's like a skinny, you know, it's like a skinny little forearm calf too, with like bacon, like a bacon tattoo. A mere pois. Yeah, and it would have had like eggs on the other leg, but he just got too tired in the middle
Starting point is 00:25:11 because that's Robert. He's just like, I know. I know. By the way, then we go. I want to say we did meet some people at a recent live show who are two chefs and they had chefy tattoos, and they showed them to us. And they were like, we still love you.
Starting point is 00:25:23 So to that, we say thank you to all the chefs who still listen. Yeah, thanks guys, and none of them were baking. So also, thank you for that. So then, Carla and Amanda are in the bathroom, and Amanda is like, they're here. Kyle, they came back. Kyle, he's a guy. Yeah, yeah, downstairs are coming. And he starts blowing up a huge tiger, and Amanda is so excited because you know, this
Starting point is 00:25:43 is her favorite thing. Like some Lindsey drama to get messy with Paige with is Amanda's favorite thing. Yeah. And um, have a live for her. Lindsey has been really um, I feel like she's recruiting Gabby to be her new Danielle because she's really reaching out to Gabby a lot and she's like, Gabby, Gabby, Gabby, Gabby, hello Gabby, Gabby, Gabby. She starts doing this thing where she's like, Gab's, you're telling Gab's mouth, so Yummy. Yummy. Hello, yummy. Yummy. Yummy.
Starting point is 00:26:05 She starts doing this thing where she's like, a gabs. Yeah, you're telling me, gabs now. So gabs. Gabs. Gabs. Gabs. And I mean, gabs, my thin yow.
Starting point is 00:26:14 I want everyone to notice I'm saying gabs, and I'm not done yow. And Danielle is telling us in the interview room, and she looks like she's just been sobbing. Her eyes are all puffy, and mean she just looks like she's been like watching Shindler's list. I mean it's like sad. She's just come out of like life is beautiful. It's like she's so sad. She's going to the whole Holocaust canon right now. I realize that it's too
Starting point is 00:26:39 Holocaust. She just watched the movies, though, made me cry. She watched very very much. Wow. Oh god, I sobbed at life cry. She watched very very much. Wow. Oh God, I sobbed at life is beautiful. I will never forget. I will never forget seeing it in college. They showed it at like our big like like on campus movie theater and it would just come out. So theater was great.
Starting point is 00:26:58 I was 800 people. I don't know like, you know, the movies we get choked up but that movie like made me sob and I just remember sobbing and then the lights came up and they were so bright and all my friends looked at me and I was sitting that movie made me sob, and I just remember sobbing. And then the lights came up and they were so bright, and all my friends looked at me, and I was sitting there in a chair sobbing, and I will never forget the way my friends looked at me like, jeez, Ben.
Starting point is 00:27:11 I went to that movie alone, okay? And I was not, because it's such a sledgehammer at the end. And it's a fun movie for the most one, for a Holocaust movie. It's like, oh my God, this is so fun. And then it ends terribly. And then it's over. And so you're just left there and I'm sobbing, you know,
Starting point is 00:27:29 just because I don't just cry. I either have no feelings or I have all the feelings. So I'm sitting there sobbing. I had to be walked to my car from two strange old ladies. They were like, they literally walked me outside. They get going. The tank, I won the tank, you look, but there's so much
Starting point is 00:27:46 about life as beautiful. I think the only other movie I cried that hard at was The Other Holocaust movie, Hope Fluts, Sandra Poin, just kidding. That was a sad movie that okay, so here we go Danielle's crying, she was crying and she's like, well great, I'm glad they're back because I want them to finish this summer off with us. I'm like, hopeful because like I want glad they're back. Cause I want them to finish the summer off with us. I'm like, hopeful, cause like, I want to figure this out. So let's get ready and have a day. Get Danielle. Danielle, just stop.
Starting point is 00:28:13 At this point, just stop it, Danielle. Okay, it's done for the summer. Like this, the shop is closed for the summer. This friendship, if it's gonna be repaired, you've got to wait a year. This is, it's over. It's not being done. It's gone be repaired, you've got to wait a year, it's over, it's not being a gonfish. It's a gonfish and gonfish and gonfish.
Starting point is 00:28:28 So Corey's like, are you talking to me? Lindsay? Yes, Corey, she's talking to you. She's walking around the house going, Gams, gams, gams, gams. She's like, you talking to me? She goes, Gaps, I'm gonna need your help, like, I'm gonna need your help,
Starting point is 00:28:43 figuring out this outfit for today. And Corey's like, you talking to me, she's like, yeah, there was, I'm gonna need your help, like, I'm gonna need your help, figuring out this outfit for today. And of course, you talk as a mage, like, yeah, there was some talk to you going around on the more mage, huh? Oh, yeah, I'm calling Gaps, that's what I call her, it's Ardain. Ungh. So then Paige is doing Craig's makeup
Starting point is 00:28:57 and Lindsay sees Maya, and Maya's like, oh, what are you doing here? And Lindsay's like, I mean, do you mean are you happy to see me? And she has, is Carl here? Maya's, Maya doesn't hide anything with her face, which I like. Maya, I mean, look, that's a friendship that was torn to Sunderva family feud Maya and Lindsay. So that's not
Starting point is 00:29:17 the actual way what I just wanted to smoke a simple day with Carl. And it ruined her friendship for life with Lindsay. So then Lindsay says this goes, well, you know, Carl does not like take well, they're like disappointed people. He's like a people pleaser and he if he can't please everyone, it like really affects his self-esteem. And I'm like, stop, stop. I'm sorry.
Starting point is 00:29:36 Can we, yeah, thank you for stopping. Go ahead. It's a natural stop there. Thank you. Carl is not a people have you watched the seasons one through like today today May 23rd, 2023 for crying out loud. Absolutely cracker buttons. This is bullshit. Carl is not a people pleaser. He is a people tease and the car all fucks with people. Carl this whole season is about Carl not showing up to work to do his job. It's about losing accounts because Carl couldn't keep people pleased.
Starting point is 00:30:06 Like Carl's plot line this season is literally not pleasing anybody, including you, because the whole engagement thing was fucked up and is now a huge drama, because he boned that up somehow. I don't even know how he did it or if it's fair to blame him. But don't stay here.
Starting point is 00:30:20 I hate when people are like, you know what? Like especially fuck boys. I'm even careful. I reformed fuck boy. Once a fuck careful. He's a reformed fuck boy. Once a fuck boy on my TV, always a fuck boy on my, they use like, I'm a people, please. You are not. You are a villain who's pretending to be nice
Starting point is 00:30:33 because he quit drinking wine coolers. And I will not have it, Carl. I want my fucked up Carl back, not drunk, but just my fucked up person who admits he's fucked up and wants to change, not a goodl who just can't take negativity. Get back to the five-in-time carl dean, carl dean. Look, just because you got some credit on this show from ordering postmates for the cast, does not make you a people pleaser, just makes you someone who's good with your phone.
Starting point is 00:30:57 And he's been nothing but non-confrontational for seasons on end. And that's what his fuel, it's not that it's what has fueled his fuck Boyory, but he's been non-confrontational for seasons on end and he's pitted people against each other usually women because he's usually not Not confident enough to go up and say like I'm not interested in you or he's not like he doesn't want to do that So we usually put the women against each other and then they fight and he's like, oh, she's really going crazy right now.
Starting point is 00:31:29 Like I like her but she's kind of a nuts. And that's what he does. And he's just being non-confrontational again. If you were a true people pleaser to be fair, he probably would have told Danielle about the engagement because he would have been pleasing a person by doing that. Exactly, yes. Exactly. Yes.
Starting point is 00:31:45 Exactly. Because as much as I think Danielle should shut up about that and it's not in her damn business and it won't owed her anything, that's my side and I'm sticking to it, I do think that Carl knew that it would bother Danielle, of course. And he chose instead, but he was pleasing Lindsay by not telling Danielle. So he was being a people pleaser in that way. But I feel like a true people pleaser would have been like, hey, listen, I know you and Danielle, things aren't really working out with you guys right now.
Starting point is 00:32:12 And I hope you don't mess this up. But I'm gonna ask her to marry me and I hope you can be happy for something to include. Like he knew that it was gonna bother Danielle. You know what I mean? Making Lindsay happy does not make a people pleaser. It makes you a person pleaser. People pleaser means you help multiple people.
Starting point is 00:32:27 I make you a terrified person. It makes you a terrified person who's doing anything he can to not get smacked in the car. Yeah, exactly. So then Lindsay's like, like you just can't like run away when things get tough and like that's just like not how life works. So like you can have a day and also board that,
Starting point is 00:32:43 but then we're going back because this is a finale time. Good for her. And this was basically I think a recap of their fight that they had when they left the house. She's like, you better get your shit together. You get one day, one day to cry. So also I know what I said about Carl,
Starting point is 00:32:59 suddenly thinking he's a good person just because he stopped drinking wine coldly. This was not very nice. Okay, I feel guilty about it. I mean, a lot of people, a lot of people in recovery have like, obviously, like, part of that is that they were under the veil of whatever substance. And now they can think clear and do better, like, make it. Right. So I know that we know, like, I know that that was city.
Starting point is 00:33:22 And I'm someone who has actual addition problems in this. Like I get it. I just go too far sometimes when I'm getting angry and then I'm not really angry, but I know it's a season finale and I am angry underneath it all. And then it just starts, then I start yelling at people about alcoholism,
Starting point is 00:33:38 which doesn't even make any sense. I don't know what I'm thinking, guys, but I'm not gonna edit it out, because I see it. Maybe a revision to that would be that not everything has been fixed just because of the subject. Yes, I think what I'm trying to say is that it bothers me. I feel like sometimes in my own life, when people get sober or they lose weight
Starting point is 00:33:59 or whatever their thing is, they've accomplished it. It's like, okay, I'm done. I'm done with everything, and now I'm holier than that. Now I'm gonna lecture you about everything. And now you're negative, and you've got this problem. Maybe you have a problem drinking, and it becomes this gross place where I think people can get to
Starting point is 00:34:18 once they have done the work for themselves that they expect it from everywhere else. So I guess that's probably where it's coming from. Maybe a little projection from my own life. I just wanna just acknowledge I know that was shitty it from everywhere. So I guess that's probably where it's coming from. Maybe a little projection from my own life. I just wanted to acknowledge I know that was shitty. So sorry. Listen, this whole podcast and projection, everything that we're saying about Carl,
Starting point is 00:34:31 I mean, we're just projecting. But I know I think that there is something to it that sometimes it's really great when people obviously enter a recovery, they're doing stuff to help their lives, etc. But sometimes there are still fundamental issues there that maybe were the cause of maybe the substance abuse or whatever, but they haven't necessarily still been addressed just by dint of going into recovery.
Starting point is 00:35:04 That being said, I was going to say something really salient about all of this. Oh, I was going to say, isn't it interesting if you compare Carl and Countess Luan? Because Countess Luan and Carl had like, they both had kind of a very, they had, they both had seasons of sobriety that were like, everything is great. I'm turning my life around. This is all going in the right direction. And then they had then a second season of sobriety where it was like, oh shit, this is hard.
Starting point is 00:35:39 I don't like being around these people and all that. I think it's actually kind of an interesting arc we saw. We're of sobriety that we see on these shows because I feel like a lot of times the sobriety that we are presented in movies or whatever is like, I clean myself up. It's tough, but I'm better now. And here we're really seeing how like,
Starting point is 00:35:56 oh, after that first year, it's hard. Yeah, I just, you know, my whole thing with it on television is you are on television. So I like, I say getting better is great, but you're so on television and like leaving the show and being like, I'm not going to take the negativity. You're so on summer house is what I'm saying. Basically, long and short of it. So Lindsey comes into pages room and pages like, I'm going to be a flamingo.
Starting point is 00:36:23 And I love when Lindsey comes in and and pretend like she's girlfriends with everybody. I think I know what are we doing anybody think I'm and pages like I'm gonna be a flamingo. Most page like response to a jungle team. Hey what what am I flamingo? I'm a flamingo. I'm a flamingo. Just pretend I'm in bush gardens in Sardar. I'm a flamingo. Just pretend I'm in Bishgarns in Sardar. I'm not Flamingo. But a clean one, not a dirty one. I got to hate dirty flamingos. Because you know page judges dirty flamingos. I bet the first time page saw a flock of flamingos, she was like, Chris, those are dirty. They're supposed to be pretty in pink. Those flamingos me dry cleaning like pro tip, pro tip
Starting point is 00:37:03 steamer. When she saw that, when she saw that planet earth clip of all those swimming goes in Peru all moving together as one big clump, she's like ew. Gross, gross too many people. Too many swimming goes here. Poor people, yes. Stupid swimming. So then Sierra is an avatar,
Starting point is 00:37:21 which is a lot. I mean, she really goes there with this. She goes full on avatar. I mean, she really goes there with this. She goes full on avatar. I mean, she really has the whole nose. She, I mean, wow. I think that was Sierra's way of saying, I'm not in the mood to make it. With anyone, so please, no one come here me
Starting point is 00:37:36 because I'm dressed in full blue paint. So if you're not gonna try to get me, you're gonna stand yourself. Okay, so Kyle's got a big blow up outfit where it looks like he's a little guy, a little Kyle, a little version of Kyle riding a tiger. And now they're gathering in the kitchen and Lindsey tells Maya who's dressed like boys and high b. She's Or should I call you Ivy? And Carl is dressed... I think he's dressed like the jungle. It's jungle themed and he's the jungle.
Starting point is 00:38:15 He's just like in a shirt and short leafy attire with a sort of like a dandy-ish kind of sash round his neck of leaves, right? Um, I don't, I don't remember. It was, hey, uh, so, uh, welcome to my jungle. We got funny games. Oh, that would be great. It would be great by the way. Welcome to this jungle. We got funny games. I don't know the rest of the song, but I really love that song. Welcome to the jungle. Welcome to the jungle we got funny games. I don't know the rest of the song, but I really love that song Oh, welcome to the jungle
Starting point is 00:38:46 Welcome to the jungle. Welcome to the Welcome to the jungle. I don't really like negativity some like I'm playing funny games and people are gonna be negative Okay, I kind of had a lot Hey those monkeys and the vines just said they weren't happy for me my engagement I just feel like it's just like a lot. It's like so much negativity in this jungle right now. It's a lot. I can't have the negativity of the jungle. So everybody starts gathering and Gab. Gab's comes in and runs up in Hux Karl and he's like, oh great see you. Oh, Gab. Gab's. Sorry, Gab. So it's like our thing. So thanks for your text, Gah,
Starting point is 00:39:26 and he said he feels much better being there now and she's like, you should, you shouldn't feel bad at all. And he's like, yo, I want to go on a good note. Y'all, so I dressed like a bunch of leaves and we're gonna have a great time today, okay. So then Chris, Chris, he walked in, he's just dressed like he's like a safari guy or something, and then Sam and Corey,
Starting point is 00:39:50 Sam and Corey are dressed sort of like, I guess Tarzan and Jane sort of, Tarzan-y, kind of thing. Tarzan and Jane, yeah. Yeah, yeah. I guess so, I said, initially I said, I thought they were cave people, but I realized, no, it's probably Tarzan and Jane.
Starting point is 00:40:04 Well, yeah, because remember they said it's their first, no, it's probably Tarzan and Jane. Yeah, because remember, they said it's their first couples out there. It's like Tarzan and Jane. I burst that out of my brain. So the demand is like a leopard, and then Danielle. Danielle sort of was like a sad zebra. She's like in zebra stripes, kind of like a hat, like a hat zebra.
Starting point is 00:40:23 It's a lot of sadness. Yeah, you know, I just, I guess I'm realizing how I hate that how much I hate this part of summer house that's all costumes and shit. I just don't, I don't look at them. I don't care about them. I think they're stupid. I'm like get a personality and stop trying to substitute
Starting point is 00:40:37 your personality with terrible Amazon costumes. Let's start there. That's a great idea. So the guests come and all of her comes and Maya's like, well, after I saw that very weird DM, I asked all of her very briefly via text and he just like glossed over it and I'm like, that's very weird to me.
Starting point is 00:40:55 It's got private situation and we're gonna discuss it when it's time, but like, I'm gonna be here for my friends right now. I was like, I'm gonna come in round the corner with some. I was like, look at Maya. I'm gonna come around the corner with some drama. I know, but also like private situation, like you guys met on Summer House, you guys have been dating on Summer House.
Starting point is 00:41:12 This is a Summer House situation, not a private situation. I'm sorry, that's okay. I'm really not liking this, and this is happening a lot across these shows, where they're like, no, that's private. It is not private, Maya. It's not fucking private. Get it on television, okay?
Starting point is 00:41:25 Even Vanderpump rules, people shouldn't be able to pull this shit. They've been around way longer than your ass, okay? But that's what Swartz and Sandivall and all those two were trying to do. You don't get to, and Ariana was trying to do. You don't get to do that. I think I could do it. So, Corey and Sam are doing shots.
Starting point is 00:41:41 They're doing this thing where, it's like a tradition out. He does like a shot and then like he kisses her, maybe with a shot still in this mouth perhaps, and sounds like this is like amazing. Like I have a boy on my arm and like I feel like we're on like the same page. Like we're connecting on like real levels now.
Starting point is 00:42:01 Like this is like no longer, put my hair, spit in my mouth, like this can go the distance. Like that's crazy. Yeah, like if you had asked me when I first met him, I would have been like, well, I did not see this coming. This was not a might being that funny.
Starting point is 00:42:21 Sam's so funny, I remember, by the way, this was like two weeks ago that you met him. So I love the acting like you're giving a speech, you know, as you're about to give birth to your first child, you know, after five years of married. But also, I saw her give an interview when it was coming out that she was dating Corey and she's like, yeah, he's my guy. I'm gonna say, I'm world-like a boyfriend on a girlfriend. It's crazy.
Starting point is 00:42:43 It's like a whirlwind. I think this is so much bigger in their heads. It's just made like a really big splash in this world that I'm not really getting. I'm not really getting. I made a reverse splash. It actually sucked water in from other sources. The pool actually drained.
Starting point is 00:43:00 The pool drained. Like, no one cares. And I just love how she also speaks and such cliche. It's like, I did not see this on my banger card. Like, about last night, dot, dot, dot, well, that just happened. This is a live-flop love, am I right?
Starting point is 00:43:15 This is nuts. Like, congratulations. You won a giant transphob that looks like he was drawn by a macaroni. Okay, congrats. Enjoy a life of watching him paint smiley faces on walls and call himself an artist. And don't think it's a coincidence
Starting point is 00:43:32 that finally Corey can like fall in love and it's with somebody who looks like they could be a course pun to Don Fox News. Okay. So, you wanna see what happens next? I wanna see what you'll be called bombshell. Okay, thanks. There we go.
Starting point is 00:43:46 Come on, shoes. Here comes one right now. Hi, I'm Michael Patrick King, host of the official Max Companion podcast, and just like that, the writer's room. Each episode, members of the writer's room, and I unpacked moments from season two, sharing juicy details you can only hear from us. Stream, and just like that, season two, starting June 22nd on Max and listen to end just like that the writers room on Max or wherever you get your podcasts.
Starting point is 00:44:13 So it's time to party. So lots of parties, lots of taking photos and stuff. And then Craig meanwhile is, he was like wandering through this party in an existential crisis about like getting engaged. We go to a man and he's like, hey, I'm like when you and Kyle dated, like how far away did you guys live from each other? Like was it far? She's like 15 minutes. Oh, oh, and you move in together. She's like, I told him I didn't want to move in until we were engaged. Do we have to talk about this now or kind of like party? Another question Did Kyle ever like try to jam a hole in the wall with a butter knife?
Starting point is 00:44:53 And did he ever maim his hand in the process just wondering if I'm allowed to that with page I hate like what if like Carl was like sewing and stuff and telling people he was a lawyer But then he wasn't really finishing law school at all. Like, what would you do? Just like, um, I feel like I'm, we're starting to talk about you a little bit now, Craig. Okay. Hey, can you explain the exception to me?
Starting point is 00:45:17 I'm like still confused a little bit. Like, what was up with that top? Craig, I know Craig, you just need some advice from somebody to explain why Paige is being like this. Paige is waiting for her own engagement season. I'm reading a lot of speculation online that, oh Paige knows that she's too good for Craig. That's always been what I've said, right? Paige is smart. She obviously knows she's too good for Craig, right? She's obviously just playing this out for TV, but they do seem to have like a chemistry and something going on, so I'm not sure that I believe that anymore. At this point, I think she's just like stop talking about this.
Starting point is 00:45:49 Next season is our season. Last season was Amanda season. This season is fucking Lindsay. You want to get up staged by Lindsay's shit? No, I want my own season. I'm a clean Flamingo. I'm one of the only clean Flamingos in the world. I'm a Flamingo, natapigen, act accordingly. So yeah, she very well, maybe. I'm just down for like no engagement seasons from anyone. That's kind of like my wish for all of us. That's not a problem. Also, you know what?
Starting point is 00:46:16 That sounds good in life, my life, my real life. That sounds good too. Everybody's like, oh my god, I'm getting married. I'm like, you're 50. No one cares anymore. Just stop making me go to your things. How many things have I been to of yours? You are 50 years old. I was good too. Everybody's like, oh my God, I'm getting married. I'm like, you're 50. No one cares anymore. Just stop making me go to your things. How many things have I been to of yours?
Starting point is 00:46:28 You are 50 years old. I've gone to your first two weddings and your first three babies. Leave me alone. At what point do you just get to tell people, leave me the fuck alone? Well, I know. I am really moving to that place. I am definitely moving to the place of no longer going. I really used to feel such guilt.
Starting point is 00:46:45 I got invited to a wedding in Pakistan once, and I felt guilty that I was like, I don't feel like I can make it. You got married in Pakistan. It was my fraternity brother. And so I got invited to this Pakistani wedding in like, meaning like in Pakistan. And I was like, oh, I feel so bad that I can't make it.
Starting point is 00:47:03 And I'm like, are you kidding me? I'm like, are you kidding me? I'm like, are you kidding me? I'm like, are you kidding me? I'm like, are you kidding me? I'm like, are you kidding me? I'm like, are you kidding me? I'm like, are you kidding me?
Starting point is 00:47:12 I'm like, are you kidding me? I'm like, are you kidding me? I'm like, are you kidding me? I'm like, are you kidding me? I'm like, are you kidding me? I'm like, are you kidding me? I'm like, are you kidding me? I'm like, are you kidding me?
Starting point is 00:47:20 I'm like, are you kidding me? I'm like, are you kidding me? I'm like, are you kidding me? I'm like, are you kidding me? I'm like, are you kidding me? I'm like, are you kidding me? I'm like, are you kidding me? I'm like, are you kidding me? I'm like, are's not my, she's like not wanting me to be a boss. I'm like, what did you, pervert? You're talking to Amanda, who married Kyle, the guy who's currently figuring out how he's gonna be peeing on a tree while he's wearing a blow up tiger.
Starting point is 00:47:33 After spending a year growing a mullet. Okay. Oh, God. I think, honestly, I think Paige is just playing the long game. She's just wearing Craig down until he finally like gives up and moves to New York City. That's all she's doing. I mean, she may be wanting an engagement season out of it. I think she's just gonna waiting for him to just kind of like age out of Charleston or. We're just trying to get canceled or something. She's like one of these days. They're gonna
Starting point is 00:47:58 do something so racist down there that the whole show is gonna go down and flames and then he'll move up here. Yeah. Maybe I don't know. I think she's just waiting for her own season. God bless her heart. So let's go to Oliver is behind the bar. Now a bunch of people are there, right? The party has started. So Oliver is behind that outside bar and some girl comes up and seems kind of innocent. Yeah. She's like, oh my God. Hey, what are you drinking? And he's like, to Kila. She goes to Kila and? And he's like, tequila. And she goes, tequila and tea. Cause he has a teacup and he goes, no, just tequila. Just, but it's in a teacup.
Starting point is 00:48:31 You guys, this guy is drinking a tequila from a teacup. It's some crazy shit. What's your name again? You were nuts. You were literally nuts. Okay, I will just do double personality. Since I think you have zero personality and I'll just do it for both of us, okay?
Starting point is 00:48:46 And so, you're just like talking and my mind is like, all over, get over here, get over here, what are you even doing right now? Come on over, get over it, can I grab him for a moment? Get over here right now. And she is like angry. But then she goes, are you mic'd up? He goes, yeah, it's fine, never mind.
Starting point is 00:49:02 That's what you'd later about it, okay? You can just stop mingling with women here, please. I think, Mayesh, I think the producers should have walked on to the set, which I know they're there. Just walk on and just say, Mayesh, you're fucking fired, get out. Who does that? It's like showing up to the Secretary pool
Starting point is 00:49:16 and refusing to answer a phone. What do you think you're doing here? Okay, it's like showing up to build a wall and refusing to put some cement in between some bricks. You don't get to do that. This is the factory. This is the pain factory. Get to budgeting.
Starting point is 00:49:29 Okay. I just feel like Maya has not been on there long enough to self-produce. So obviously not because she gets caught on Mike every time telling him to turn them. Well, you know, we can hear you when you say turn off the mic. You know, this is Brava.
Starting point is 00:49:42 This is not their first time dealing with mics fired. Do you know that they like literally? I mean, they we found out some have been lot because of Bravo. They had a mic somewhere in like Europe and they're like, just turned that game a little bit. Uh, got them, you know, they just got them all across from countries away and went to the bathroom one time when she was on concert on tour.
Starting point is 00:50:06 Oh, well, I just booked this amazing gig. I had a wedding in Pakistan. Love for sale. Wow, even the helicopters were out for this one. Yes, they're saying it's called Zero Dark 30, which at first I thought was a criticism of my show, but it turns out it was just a mission that they used me for to find us. I'm a bin Laden on Bravo Well, can I get a bigger spotlight? This is just like a little tiny laser. How are people supposed to see me in this need this bigger? Please we got the yacht. Oh, what is that? We got the terrorists
Starting point is 00:50:51 the yacht. Oh, what is that? We got the terrorists. Okay. So she's visited all of her. And yeah, I put fire her. You're on a reality show. All you're willing to say on camera is that you dated Kwame and you think Sam talks too much. Goodbye. You've overstayed. Goodbye. Even the same thing, she pulled Sam into a quiet closet away from people. I was like speaking in her stones. So I think that actually that is really bad. And I think that as much as I enjoy Maya, and I think that she's like really smart
Starting point is 00:51:14 and has like a, I like her perspective on things, I don't know if she's cut out for this show. Maya is one of those products that you see on Facebook and they look amazing. She had promised, but it really didn't deliver. You know what I mean? And if it does deliver, it's taken way too long and it's no longer worth it.
Starting point is 00:51:31 So go. Bye. Or maybe it was delivered and there was never a confirmation email and so it stayed in the suite and maybe it was never received and the person who ordered it in the first place thought it was never since at all. We no longer have a need. Okay, goodbye. So she's like, could we just stop mingling with the woman here on
Starting point is 00:51:49 place? And he's like, okay, sorry. So she walks off and I'll piss off. And then Jerez is sort of fighting with Chris. Yeah. Chris must think this whole season robots are around him. Because he's really putting a lot of effort into every scene he's in. Chris is like my least favorite sort of person I want to encounter at a party, just like brash, and I think he believes he's more entertaining than he is, which I suppose I could
Starting point is 00:52:21 probably do that too, but maybe that's why I don't like it in Chris because it's pretty I believe I'm more entertained than I am, but I'm really only there to entertain myself in the first place I'm like literally I'm a master of a Torrey Narsusist. You're entertaining. Okay, like you're like literally an entertaining person Chris is not Like no one has laughed at Chris jokes all season long except for him bus is hard It's so sad when you can't even like somebody that works out like that. I know he's so handsome, but I know he's so pretty. I'm so pretty. That's bad personality.
Starting point is 00:52:49 It's so strange. It's crazy. So then we go to Gabby and Matt. So she's Gabby. Gab's, as we call her now, totally our thing. Gab's has brought Matt, that little wiener she's dating. The human, the human equivalent of a weener dog Matt She's brought him and he's like I have been trying to text you and she's like um well
Starting point is 00:53:10 I don't have my phone on me at every given moment So but I just got my phone so now I can see oh my god. You did text me Wow look at me. I'm making an effort to be a good person. So is it working? I know She's saying and she tells us like her little arc is that she Like she feels like she's giving people a chance that she wouldn't have given them people a chance for before. So to everyone who thought there might be some sort of arc about Sierra feeling that Gabby is privileged, congratulations. There was no fall through on that storyline
Starting point is 00:53:38 and whatever clash we thought might come from that. Maybe I'll happen at the reunion it seems like, but yeah, congrats. So, I still have hope for Gabby though. This is like Gabby's first season, and I think she'll come to play a little bit harder. I think Gabby has tremendous potential. I hope they turn her back. I really do.
Starting point is 00:53:56 Also, importantly about Matt, Matt, the, so Matt comes up and he's like, oh, by the way, I want to meet you to my, I want to introduce you to my friends Kevin and Molly, because of course I've got a set of friends named Kevin and Molly. And I believe the only reason why they include this is because then when they meet Molly, she goes, hangy, I'm Molly. I'm made to meet you. Like, I love your outfit.
Starting point is 00:54:17 I think it's so junkly. And Frank is so junkly. I'm Molly. Hmm. Okay. So jumbling Klammally K K Why is Molly not a cast member like to think it was Kavin Mally stat I know but then they have to ring Kevin and Matalong and Kevin and Mat really aren't Kevin and Mat are like let's play trivial pursuit but then they never get anything right
Starting point is 00:54:39 You're like why I only wanted to be on your team because you wanted to play this game I figured you knew how to play the game. They're like, no, it's just a good conversation starter. Kevin's like, hey, I got you tickets to the Louis Capaldi concert. Does anyone want to come? I'm like, please just go. Don't be on this show. Okay, so, um, jungling.
Starting point is 00:54:58 So Lauren is there, who I actually saw that and I was like, who the fuck is Lauren? Okay, so Chris, that's the girl that who the fuck is Lauren? Okay, so Chris That's the girl that Chris is dating. He's like so would you supposed to be a fairy? She goes um I guess I'll give you another shot at that one. He goes a tooth fairy Chris is a fairy. It's a fairy. It's a fairy. It's a fairy. It's a more specific and the the fairy category I'm 80 it's not this jungle theme. She's dressed as Maybe a butterfly of some sort,
Starting point is 00:55:27 an insect, a dragonfly. Yeah, dumb dumb. We never got to find out. We never find out. So then Maya, that is Neenie, right? Does that, did you see Neenie? She said that last week and I was like, Ronnie is literally crazy.
Starting point is 00:55:41 What is he talking about? It was totally Neenie from Top Shed. I love Nini. And why did they not even give her a courtesy thing like that just said, Nini, Maya's friend, like a little Easter egg for us. That was so rude, but I was so happy to see her. Yeah, I love her.
Starting point is 00:55:56 And she was having so much fun and laughing. I was like, I wanna be friends with Nini. Okay, so Maya's talking to Nini. And she's like, oh my, can you believe all of her's here? Like, I mean, we got a camera on us so I can't talk about this right now. I'm like, you're talking to Nini and she's like, Oh, my, can you believe all of her's here? Like, I mean, we got a camera on her, so I can't talk about this right now. I'm like, you're talking to another reality star.
Starting point is 00:56:09 Even Mini would talk about this. Nini was ready. Mini would be like, that guy's cheating on me and how's he, here's how to properly cut Nini in. I know. While I tell you about it. Cut it from the back of your knife instead, which by the way, Ronnie, you told me about that.
Starting point is 00:56:23 And she even sent us the video, and I still can't do it. I don't know why I haven't done the block. It's literally the easiest way to do it. It's not pain. So I'm sorry, I just can't have this negative video right now about my own eating. Like, me and he's just like a people blizzard, just like me. So Chris, then, so Kyle's walking around,
Starting point is 00:56:45 he's got this inflatable tiger, as you mentioned. And then Chris has like a machete kind of thing. And Chris is like, I'm gonna chop off your tiger head. And Kyle's like, ah, and he's like, yeah, I'm gonna do it. And Kyle's like, wait, what? And he's like, I'm gonna do it, do you want me to do it? I want me to do it. And there's like this tense moment where Kyle is thinking,
Starting point is 00:57:02 is Chris gonna chop off the head of my costume? And I was like, this is why I don't like Chris, because he would have cut off that costume head and think it's funny, but he would have ruined Kyle's costume in the process. I mean, that would have been the one good thing he did this summer. I would have been like, recast. I mean, cast him again. Okay, so then we see that we're in the kitchen now, and Danielle and Lindsay are both in there, but they're talking shit to other people about each other.
Starting point is 00:57:29 And it's like ding, gives them the arrows, which is now house summer house. It's like, this is how we do, this is how we're branding summer house. We do a lot of arrows with names and say, ding. And that's how you can tell. Winterhouse summer house and summer house Martha's Vineyard are all part of the same family
Starting point is 00:57:45 Yeah, I love that they had that meeting where somebody was like we're gonna do arrows and dings with names on them Like yeah, can we get kris in here? Yeah, she's our arrows and circles girl. Yeah, we have a scene in a kitchen Can we get them? Can we get like two circles one arrow? Maybe some a kairans on that. I'm right on top of that Chris is like okay guys got it. Alright, kris said that is a right on top of that. Chris is like, okay, guys, got it. Like, Karissa, that is a sorely. Okay, that is a sorely. How are we supposed to know?
Starting point is 00:58:09 Is a sorely, it needs to point at somebody, Karissa. Someone teach Karissa arrows, okay. Yeah. So, yeah, so basically like one girl is telling Lindsay, like, oh my god, Lindsay, like, I haven't even gone over to talk to Danielle yet because I'm afraid, I'm afraid I'm just gonna like snap it I'm just gonna like go off on Dan y'all you know and Daniel's like then talk to then Lindsay's like yeah calm was like a disaster in the car on the way over here you're just like I'm a people weaser and like I'm gonna turn this
Starting point is 00:58:40 kid tell you right right around using navigation is this and I'm gonna drive right back to New York. And the friends, like, have you talked to her yet? Now, wasn't this the same friend who is being Danielle's friend in just a little while? Isn't this the real skinny chick with the black skirt and the big black hat? I couldn't. She's talking to you?
Starting point is 00:58:59 I couldn't, honestly, I couldn't tell most people apart. I was just like generic people, you know, just, it was just faces, blurs, cats, summer houses. Yeah, it's like watching, it's like watching a party of we avatars. Okay, so it's like one of the hot sauce aisle. At some point, they're just all sauce.
Starting point is 00:59:20 Yeah, and kind of them are spicy, so that's not a great example. But it actually, it's perfect. It is actually the most good example for this cast the spicy mild mild mild spicy people Yeah, the mile salsa had its own line in the grocery store. Yeah, it would have been perfect. Otherwise, I think like the bread aisle bread You know or the crackers. Okay, so, um, let's see here.
Starting point is 00:59:49 The friend is like, have you talked to her yet? And was he like, no, maybe she realized I'm really past and the friend's like, she's about to get her ass handed to her and I can't wait, you go, Lindsay. And so then, we cut to Cory and Sam, like the love story of the season with his hand up, his up her ass crack Looking each others tongue and she goes
Starting point is 01:00:10 This is that very MGK life. Oh my god. That's why you're doing it You what did she say what did she say? And you said MGK MGK machine gun Kelly. They're like like Why do I ask these questions? I'm trying to be like Megan Fox machine gun Kelly. Life you're not. You're not. Machine dumb Kelly.
Starting point is 01:00:32 So what were you doing with this? That was what you were making out. That's, no, that's core going. Oh, core is like. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, I thought you were doing their making out during the making out so you know it's like wow that's that also It's not that far away from what is that like Friday 13th But that is that of course So uh Sounds yeah, so yeah, I guess you said this is very MGKMS, which I'm like disgusted, I'm disgusted
Starting point is 01:01:06 that this is entered my soul. And Sam is like, do I look hot? And he goes, of course, you look sexy as fuck, she goes, I mean, I know, I just need to hear it. It's very, it's very Samantha Fox of me. Not Samantha Fox. Megan. Megan, Megan Fox.
Starting point is 01:01:22 Not a big deal, though, too. She's like Megan Fox, what if I transformed right now? He's like, please don't. Please Megan Fox. Not only did love to. She's like Megan Fox. What if I transformed right now? It's like, please don't. Please don't. I don't believe it. Bumblebee. So Greg is now pulling page over for a chat. They sit down and add around our chairs. And she's like, I feel like we're like here's those chairs. Sorry. Go ahead. You do. I'll have to say I hate matter I want an uncomfortable, stupid design for a chair. Okay, go on. So, I like them because they're angled, they're nice.
Starting point is 01:01:50 Just squat. You know what? You've got to squat and fall backwards, you know? Well, at the very least, can you respect that they have a really lovely arm rest size? Yeah. Sure. They need to be because you have to pull yourself up from the depths of hell to get
Starting point is 01:02:08 out of them. But it's like, is it? I'm not for big people, I guess, as cool as I say. Okay, that's, I get that. I just like, I love how we can sit in them and then there's always a place for your drink. In a way that's not like one of those Costco chairs that the drinks sit in it. I like that. So they sit there and pages like,
Starting point is 01:02:25 I feel like we're in like 80 year olds, like watching our like kids have a party, which is funny because I guess that means we had children late in life, but either way. It's funny because that's how Shep Craig in Austin always look when they're farting, but glad you're probably joining. So Craig's like, congrats, baby, we built this.
Starting point is 01:02:46 Ha ha ha. She's like, um, now what's driving? Everyone's sleeping over. So what's up, dude? And he's like, well, before our conversation, like, I thought I was gonna propose in the next like six months, but then like, after our conversation, I know a lot more now than I did before,
Starting point is 01:03:02 but like, after our conversation, there's like, a lot of stuff that has to happen before the conversations does happen. And in that conversation, I just a lot of conversation. She's like, how is Paige still sitting there? How is Paige not just flicked him on the forehead and just been like, I'm not your flamingo and walked away? That's the ending I need.
Starting point is 01:03:22 She probably swapped herself out for like a long flamingo and just put it on the chair. She's like, just just back over there. Like, Christ does talking to the decoy. Yeah, he doesn't realize. Oh, so anyway, yeah, she is like, he's like, I just wanna have kids the next five years. Cause same, like two really cute adorable flamingos.
Starting point is 01:03:40 Yeah, and that means we have to get married and then we have to get, but before then we have to get engaged and then in order to get engaged, we have to get like married and then we have to get but before then we have to get engaged and then or to get engaged We have to like live together in order to live together We have to like actually book up a plane ticket and like what if orbritz goes down like then what do we do? Like what do we get a plane ticket? I'm like I try to go to an expedia But like I misspell it all the time and I always wind up going to federal express and it's just like confusing like how we get married then By the way, none of that's true. You can get pregnant right now
Starting point is 01:04:04 You could get pregnant right now. You could get married and never live together. You can do whatever the fuck you want, okay? Welcome to you, Marka. So talk about a lot of people here, Ronnie. Give him his options. Do whatever you want. That's what I tell myself now,
Starting point is 01:04:17 and I love a much happier life. If ever I'm sad, I say, you know what you can do right now? Whatever the fuck you want. You know what, there's a very wise song that goes something like this Good song. I think real housewives of Orange County. Okay, so She's like yeah, okay, I get it you want to start the process, but I feel like you get scared. Like if we don't do things immediately, I'm going to like run away.
Starting point is 01:04:48 Yeah. He's because you know why? Because everyone's telling him she's way too good for you. She's going to run the hell away from you. Does she not have ears? Does she not hear you? Does she not see you drooling half the time? Like what's wrong with her?
Starting point is 01:05:03 You just threw a quarter sheet pan into the pool yesterday, and then you're like wondering why she might run away. Okay? So like, yeah, you just started crying because you forgot to call your mom on Mother's Day and then yelled at her. Okay. That's why you forced her to watch minions
Starting point is 01:05:22 when she wants to watch Love Island. So Craig's like, sometimes I just think things are like too good to be true and peach goes okay Craig if I knew I couldn't be with you like I would know it like the last time I had this conversation with someone I like broke out into hives Which luckily we're like very in at that moment, so I look great But unfortunately it was because it was a rabbit that I was having a conversation with and I'm allergic to rabbits. So I learned never to have that conversation
Starting point is 01:05:49 of the rabbit again. I was seven years old. And I said, Mr. Tinkleface, I cannot marry you. And I got hats. And a little bit of a cut. So I had that conversation. I was eating peanut butter cracker and I, my throat closed up. I almost died because I shouldn't be eating peanut butter. So I know now I'm not eating peanut butter cracker and I, my throat closed up, I almost died
Starting point is 01:06:05 because I shouldn't be eating peanut butter. So I know now I'm not eating peanut butter, I could totally wear a yo. I know some things that I didn't know before. And, you know, I know that being with you is like not the wrong decision, it's just a foolish one. And I do think that like the next step as moving, as moving, like maybe like, you know, moving
Starting point is 01:06:25 maybe it's like maybe like more of a unit, like maybe that's more important. We could just be a unit where I'm like a very fashionable, smart, flamingo, and you're just like the dirty shrimp pool that I weighed in. Yeah. She's like, well, we should do it. Like if you have to be in Charleston, don't all be in Charleston And if I have to be in New York, don't we'll be in New York. He's like, oh my god, that's great. And she's like gross But I need a closet. She's like, no, but where am I gonna put my clothes? I don't care. I hope you die
Starting point is 01:07:00 Do you want to move in? Yes. Okay. Well, that's too bad. With Sierra? Okay. Hold on. Let me call it Perry. You see if he still has an extra room. By the way, that's their little ending. That was really her saying, right, like when you're shooting Southern charm, I'll go down there.
Starting point is 01:07:21 When I'm shooting Summer House, you come up here. Yeah, we're going to keep our three shows. That's what she's saying. So then Kyle and Amanda, they're kind of gossiping. They're wasted. Kyle's like, oh yeah, like when you show your butt, did you talk to Lindsay or Carl yet? She's like, I mean, I said hi, but he's like, well, I don't know if they've talked to Danielle.
Starting point is 01:07:40 She's like, I don't think so. He's like, well, I actually do think like, like I think Danielle would have made an effort to reconcile it. And she's like, yeah, deep down Danielle sees it as repairable and he goes, I don't think Lindsay does. She goes, really? Fuck.
Starting point is 01:07:54 Thank you, too. The worst, the worst, these guys, always brewing something. So party, party, party. And Craig and Paige come back to the group and they're pretending like Craig just proposed. Like she's pretty, like, here's my ring, here's my ring. It's like, oh my God.
Starting point is 01:08:12 And she goes, I said to my set, I'm in full feathers, I'd fucking kill you. Do not propose to me while I'm wearing feathers. I'm not like Lindsay, who puts on a hideous dress and walks to a beach under the guise of gathering wood and is happy with that. Okay, I want something more sophisticated than fucking getters.
Starting point is 01:08:27 Gams, gams, gams. Sorry guys, that's our thing. Hi gams. It's like the blow dexailing fire alarm that goes off every episode. Gams, gams, gams. Like, Captain Glenn just runs into the party. Try to think.
Starting point is 01:08:43 It's like drop anchor, drop anchor. This is a party in the Hamptons. There's no anchor to drop. So run the kitchen again and Danielle comes in when Lindsay's in there. So Lindsay is making a big show out of calling gaps to open champagne together and Danielle's just standing there texting next to them.
Starting point is 01:08:57 And so then Jerez comes in and wants water and then don't have any. Like why did I write that down? I wrote that too. Cause Danielle goes, Dresn, what's hilarious? You literally always ask for water and we literally always don't have it.
Starting point is 01:09:12 Fun fact about the summer house. So, this explains why they're so thirsty. So, Dresn, meanwhile, Dresn, we haven't seen him since the beginning of the season and he's back and he precipitates the big fight because he, these like five people, Lindsay and Danielle are literally next to each other but not acknowledging each other but Derez brings everyone into do a toast. So they have to do like Lindsay and Danielle have to do this forced toast and they toast
Starting point is 01:09:37 and then Danielle, oh Danielle is so awkward. I like, it's really hard to know that I like, I mean, I really, she's just really terrible in this. She goes, she goes, um, so this is probably what I would have preferred the engagement to be a little bit more like, well, Mike Danielle. You could have, this was like for everybody else, it's you. You could have just done it.
Starting point is 01:10:01 If you wanted to be like this, you could have acted like that, instead of acted like a crazy lunatic. Like I've said, a million times, because people don't seem to realize that I have this opinion. I have been on Daniel's side about the French going a sunder. I have not been on her side for how she acted
Starting point is 01:10:17 and her response to the engagement. I think her response has been absolutely crazy and so tacky and so ridiculous. And now's going to be like it would have been nice if this is what the engagement was like you don't get to shame her for how the engagement was and she didn't even plan that well she probably did plan that party let's be honest. Well she's like okay we're gonna have this discussion now right and Lindsay's like okay here we go so this is the big finale discussion everybody knows that this is gonna be big and so here we go so she this is the big finale discussion. Everybody knows that this is going to be big. And so here we go. So she's like, yeah, there's nothing more than I want to celebrate more
Starting point is 01:10:51 than your happiness, Lindsay. I don't think you know that though. And Lindsay's like, I don't. Like Lindsay's really cold. Like, I don't. Now, I think Lindsay's gonna, Lindsay's doing this cold thing because she knows what Danielle's gonna do. And, okay, Danielle spent her entire engagement party walking around to all of Lindsay's friends being like, can you believe I didn't know? Talking shit about Lindsay and Carl, okay? Then Lindsay finds out about that stuff. Then she spent all day-to-day going around to all the girls being like, oh my god, we're gonna have a talk.
Starting point is 01:11:19 I don't even know when the talk's gonna be to all the people that don't like Lindsay. So, I think Lindsey was very, very smart. She knows Danielle is going to try and make a huge dramatic scene about this and cry and go into history on X. And I think Lindsey is like, I'm not going to give that to you. And I think it comes across looking cold as fuck. But guess what? Lindsey is cold as fuck. She's my little robot. Okay. She's my little robot cop. And I love it. So you go Lindsay, you go. Lindsay was, Lindsay was hilariously cold in this fight.
Starting point is 01:11:48 So Daniel's like, I just, you know, I've been wanting to celebrate you for a really long time and Lindsay's like, yeah, well, last Saturday was that opportunity? So I absolutely agree with you that that was the opportunity. That was, that was the moment, but Daniel's saying it in a way of like, that was the moment like you guys should have included in a way of like, that was the moment.
Starting point is 01:12:05 Like, you guys should have included me in it. Instead of saying, you're right, I totally overreacted. I think I'm in my feelings, yada yada yada, but instead she's like implying that it would have been the moment, but you guys ruined it, which is like not the case at all Danielle. And Lindsay's just like, yeah. Like, she's giving her this really cold smile like yeah, Danielle
Starting point is 01:12:27 like she's just a piece of shit on her shoe and Danielle's like, but I found out like 30 minutes before and she's yeah, because he didn't want to ruin the surprise. He didn't want anyone to ruin the surprise. So this was a little like I don, because Danielle, such a fucking drama queen, she'd been having a fit about them moving too fast and doing all of this other stuff. I think Danielle would have gone to Lindsay and been like, don't do it. Or she would have made some kind of scene about it.
Starting point is 01:12:54 Yeah, I actually don't disagree on that point, but I think this is classic Carl to be like, I didn't want everyone to surprise, but he told Chris, who we barely knew. So it was like, mm, just say, I didn't want to tell you Danielle because honestly, I don't trust you with this information anymore. That's all you have to say. And so you're not supportive of us.
Starting point is 01:13:15 Why would I tell you? Because by the way, Danielle totally would have ruined the surprise, but I'm just saying, we didn't tell anyone. It's like, but you told Chris. So it's like, I hate that kind of like, that's more of a Carl thing than a Lindsey thing. I hate that kind of like double talk, that Carl does, you know?
Starting point is 01:13:29 Yeah. So then Amanda comes to the stairs to listen with Craig because this is like Amanda's favorite TV show, you know, Lindsey going crazy. So she comes and Craig is listening because he's a mess as well. And she goes, oh my God, let's move to that bench over there. Kyle, I'm Greg.
Starting point is 01:13:44 She goes, I know, but I have to take Kyle. Let's move over there. So Danielle's like, Lindsey, I thought we were best friends. And Lindsey goes, I did too. Danielle's like, you don't think that would hurt me. And she has a moment between the two of us. Why is that about you, Danielle? Because I thought I'd meant something to you. And she's like, yeah, well, I thought you did too. And she's just, you don't think that I was going to hurt from that.
Starting point is 01:14:12 I'm like, Daniel, this is, you bet. This is a terrible argument. Like, you're, this is not your strong, this is not a strong point, Daniel. You have lost, you've lost the argument for the summer and I was a supporter. You've lost the argument. Well, thank I was a supporter you've lost the argument Well, thank you because I get sick of ranting about it It's my son not have to say it
Starting point is 01:14:28 But also Danielle's trying to like start crying now, which is cracking me up because she she thought she was gonna get into this thing with Lindsey Lindsey was gonna have a fit Danielle could be a huge victim and run off crying. It was gonna be this huge scene But instead Lindsay's not going in but Danielle is continuing the scene as if it were going that way It's like Danielle, you're so bad at this. Your bad is bad. You've always been bad at this and now we're seeing just how bad you are at it Okay, so Lindsay's staying calm. She goes like well, I thought you met something to me too So tell me I was like Like trying to cry. So Lindsay laughs and she goes,
Starting point is 01:15:05 you don't think that everything you've said this summer has hurt me and Danielle's like, so that's what you're thinking. So it's because I thought you were moving too fast. You wanted to cut me out of an entire money medal part of your life. No, it's not just because you said she was moving too fast. It's that you went to all of her enemies
Starting point is 01:15:23 to talk shit about her. I'm just upset at every week, but that's went to all of her enemies to talk shit about her. I'm just upset at every week, but that's why, and I hate that they never address it. And this is where I kind of think Lindsay is kind of losing in this fight because she's not bringing up the important things. But I also think that Lindsay's like,
Starting point is 01:15:37 I'm not giving this girl the same. Fuck her, I don't have to justify anything to her, we're not friends. Well, I also think that Lindsay's a robot when she does move on from someone, she like does not get emotional about such as like friends. Well, I also think that Lindsay's a robot. When she does move on from someone, she does not get emotional best, so she's like whatever. So, and then this is actually funny
Starting point is 01:15:49 because this is when Lindsay kind of just turns into a game show host, you know, because Daniel's like, so you just want to cut me out of an entire monumental part of your life. Correct, correct. Nice question. Correct. And Daniel's like, you think,
Starting point is 01:16:04 I don't want to be happy for you. Correct. And Danielle's like, you think I don't wanna be happy for you. Uh, correct. One more. And you're moving to the super speed glit around. Okay, um, I think I'll take like, are you serious for 300? Like, that's fucking crazy. Correct. So Danielle's getting all worked up. So then we hear someone go Sierra. I'm going in
Starting point is 01:16:27 So then Craig and Amanda motion now. No, because they're what they're like don't ruin the scene You know the way we get that from because they're hidden behind the wall sitting on the bench listening into this So Sierra's like oh my god. They said we can't go in there. Why are they being like let's go to the front? Let's go to the front and Craig's like oh my god. They're having having a full on. They might swing at each other. Craig is the biggest drama queen Out of all of these drama queens Craig is the biggest one is going on telling everyone outside like it's like a war zone in there I think they're gonna like swing at each other like one of them as a knife like it's scary bro. Lincy's got a chain side It's getting ugly in there. So see here as they go to the from sear and my I run to the front door and So we go back to the scene and Daniel's like I have been through every single break up. You've ever
Starting point is 01:17:12 Ha and then do like Go next question if you win if you win this round. I might start calling you and gums All right If you win this round, I might start calling you Agams Alright, um, this next category is Please ask a rhetorical question. Okay. You don't think I want you to be happy Alright $300 for you Um, but you want to know why she's okay then why I'm gonna take us cuz the second I started dating Carl I said no and she's oh if you see it from that perspective Lindsay you are so wrong like you don't think I would have put everything aside and been been there with a fireworks for you
Starting point is 01:17:56 And she's like oh cuz you've proven otherwise is somewhere Danielle I went to the Hudson River and I stood there and I looked at a barge and there were no fireworks. So if you're gonna say that there were fireworks for us, I don't think so. So no. Because by the way, that is the only role Lindsey will accept of Danielle in this friendship, by the way, is someone who will literally like fireworks for her. And so, like, the moment that is, it's just funny because Danielle wants to like, supplicate herself for Lindsay, but then she gets like upset when she's not in that... She gets upset when Lindsay gets mad at her for not being in the role of being this upland in a weird way. I don't know. I know I'm not even a bother trying to untangle
Starting point is 01:18:49 my thoughts on this one. Well, my friend, another friend of mine put it in a really good way. She said, Danielle is the supporting player in the relationship and she's upset knowing that that's all she's like she's except up said accepting it You know, she's like she's a supporting player to somebody who's like always a star and all anybody in Lindsay's life is in her movie You know what I mean? How they tell you in self-help like this is your movie you are the star of your own movie or whatever I think Lindsay takes that very very literally and everybody else in it like is just kind of in her story You know, she's not necessarily in theirs. Now that said, we really haven't ever seen Danielle do anything
Starting point is 01:19:30 but kissing Lindsay's ass. So I have no idea. I mean, we know that Lindsay's been supportive of Danielle's app and quitting her job and doing all of this stuff. Lindsay was never not supportive of that. She's been really supportive of Robert and all of that. So I don't know that that's a fair assessment I don't know if we come to that because Lindsay's just the loudest one, but
Starting point is 01:19:50 Yeah, I don't know I think Danielle's just kind of a sad sap and I think that she realized her meal ticket was leaving because she was the Supporting player to this star Yeah, and if she wasn't gonna be friends with this star anymore and the star was gonna have her own person She needed to be friend the other girls and to be friend those girls She brought them the red meat they wanted which was fights with Lindsay. That's how I look at it I think like I'm there with you 95% like I don't think that she like brought like red meat to them So that way she could become friends with them But I do think that she actually realized she thought they had a better friendship that they really had. And Lindsay and Carl, you know, Lindsay definitely, Lindsay definitely started, you know, just
Starting point is 01:20:30 focusing on Carl and not Danielle and Danielle. That's a tough pull to swallow when people do that and Danielle could not swallow it because if she's not going to be a supporting character, if she's supporting air, what is she really like, what is her life then? So I think that's like, I think all her arguments have been all over the map all summer long, but they all just come down to the fact that she, she feels left behind. And that's that. So, um, 10DL's doing this. I would have done everything and my throwing this fit. Because you know, she knows she has an audience too. And Lindsay's like, I'm sure Danielle.
Starting point is 01:21:03 Mm-hmm. And Danielle's like, don't look at me with your fucking smug face right now. And she goes, why are you yelling at me right now, Danielle? And Amanda's like horrified by this question. And Danielle screams, you don't know how much I fucking care for you and that. And she goes, no, because of how you've been treating me this summer, no, I don't.
Starting point is 01:21:23 She's like, good for you. Good for you, letting Danielle just look fucking insane. I mean, this is the best move and I can't believe Lindsey has gotten to the point where she can do this. This is not Lindsey at all. Lindsey would come in here and verbally beat the shit out of this woman, but she's like, Jill. Well, because she knows she has the upper hand in this one because Danielle, Danielle's
Starting point is 01:21:44 so colossally fucked up at the engagement party that there's really nothing she can say to her. Lindsay just has the upper hand in this argument and whatever valid point Danielle does have about like, you guys have left me behind and I think I'm acting out, but like, I still want to be, whatever she could have done certain things, but she's not. And like the moment she calls Lindsay's face smug, it's like you've now officially lost this argument. And so, Lindsay knows it, so she has all the power,
Starting point is 01:22:11 she doesn't need to get mad, she doesn't need to get flustered. And Danielle's like, for the summer, I treat you for the summer, I've been here for you for fucking years, and it looks, and same, and same. Which is hilarious because I only think that Lindsey's been there for Danielle the same way. But why?
Starting point is 01:22:29 I mean, we would, you know, why would, why would we say Lindsey hasn't been there for Danielle? We've seen Lindsey being a good friend to Danielle. I think we'd just all assume that Lindsey's this horrible person because she is so aggressive in her like, her personal, her personal, her happiness and her unappiness is just so out there. But I've never seen her be a bad friend to Danielle.
Starting point is 01:22:49 I've never seen her throw Danielle under the bus in any way to anybody else or talk shit about her. Or do any of the stuff that Danielle has done to Lindsay. I've never seen Lindsay do anything, but be kind and nice and include Danielle in everything. And maybe it's because she does want a sidekick, you know? Maybe it is, but she hasn't been me to her sidekick.
Starting point is 01:23:07 Listen, if she looks at Danielle as the help, she hasn't been me into the help. I haven't seen you prove that she's been a bad friend to Danielle. You're right, she hasn't thrown her under the bus, et cetera. But it does seem like their relationship revolves around Lindsay and Lindsay's issues. And so like when Danielle does need a friend,
Starting point is 01:23:26 I always think of that scene this summer, where Danielle's like crying, and she's like, I just need you to check it on me. Like she's clearly like something's going on, and Lindsay just, rather than like talking with her, Lindsay just like shots her up, it's like, I'm gonna hug you. I'm gonna hug you, there, there, be quiet.
Starting point is 01:23:40 Stop talking to me, she's like Lindsay's like, I don't wanna hear this. I don't actually wanna hear what's going on in your life. But either way. I think she was saying you need more for me than I'll shut up and just give you give you a hug Like fine, and then she did check in with her after that and was saying, but what about you? You said to check in more You know what I mean? So I don't know because to me it looked like Danielle disappeared too. She got with Robert. She moved she quit her job She moved out of the city. She went to the country and was living in this little place alone waiting for Robert to come home from work while she's working on this app, which is still not
Starting point is 01:24:13 even close to being done because I saw her trying to hire for free help or whatever on Instagram a few weeks ago. So I think she's been in her own weird place and now she's trying to make it sound like she's been left. When you, Lindsey even said like, you're the one who left the city, like, why don't you make plans and come to the city? Like, why is this on me? I think, by the way, like, the unspoken thing in all this is that Danielle's relationship
Starting point is 01:24:38 has been going down the tubes. She's, she's got this startup that who knows what it's doing. And like, I would not be surprised if that's also fueling about 50% of this wild emotional reactions to everything that's happening. So Daniel's like, she's like, what's wrong with you? You're coming at me with no emotion. I can see it on your face that you don't give a shit about me.
Starting point is 01:24:58 And you don't give a shit about this friendship. And I'm not gonna let you point the finger at me. And Lindsay's like, that's what's not gonna happen. That's what's not. And she's losing and all the girls are on the stairs listing like, oh my God. This is amazing. Paige is like, I've worked so hard for this.
Starting point is 01:25:14 It's like, I'm a mom on dance moms. And it's finally recital time. This is amazing. By the way, Daniels, one of Daniels' problems is I think that she looks for gestures or she perceives gestures and things that aren't happening. So it's like Lindsay's not being emotional off with shows that Lindsay doesn't care about this friendship.
Starting point is 01:25:30 You know, she didn't get a call about this engagement which shows that she's not part of this group or whatever. Like, she's sort of like, she does a lot of inferencing whereas I think Lindsay's a very direct person. So they have like a fundamental flaw in how they even, I think, communicate with each other. And I know that we're probably overanalyzing this, but this is what we do. I see Dan Yell's form of communication in friendships. The way that she tries to please other people, her love language I guess, is going to battle against people that they don't like to prove that she's
Starting point is 01:25:59 loyal to that person. I think with Lindsay, she did that, which a good example was with Sierra. When she just started getting into was with Sierra. When she just started getting into it with Sierra for no reason and it ended up in the glass throw in the wine toss and all that stuff that happened last time, that wasn't even a bad Danielle. It was Danielle trying to start trying to fight for Lindsay over all the Austin stuff. Yeah. Most of the fights that Lindsay that Danielle's gotten into have been not because Lindsay's astrotude. That's just Danielle's like love language. She goes in there and she starts fighting for you. And I think that that's why I've been pointing.
Starting point is 01:26:29 It's not that the other girls are, it's like, oh girl, that she's expressing her love with me. She's a girl, you know. Yes, I think she's trying to be involved in the pack by saying, look what I do. This is how I show my friendship. My, I go for people that maybe you don't necessarily like,
Starting point is 01:26:46 because some of the stuff, it's just so performative. All of this is so fucking performative from Danny. She's yelling, she's screaming, she knows everybody's watching her, she's doing the, you don't care about me. I would take the clothes off of my back for you. I know I realized that I'm a fucking idiot. Well, all that's bullshit,
Starting point is 01:27:03 because you couldn't even come to the engagement party without talking shit to everybody that she knew and all of her best friends. So, but you would do anything for her is obviously not true, right? Well, also it's like what has been revealed is that it's all conditional. And, or, you know, she's like,
Starting point is 01:27:18 I would do X, Y, and Z for you, like, X, Y, and Z, like, Larsa Pippin. But, you know, then she's like, and now you do it for me, you know? And it's like, well, no,Way and Z, like, Larsa Pippin. But, you know, then she's, then she's like, and now you do it for me, you know? And it's like, well, no, you chose to do that. Doesn't mean that that's how, like, why do I have to do it in that way? Like, yes, obviously, I still believe
Starting point is 01:27:35 that Lindsay was being a shitty friend to Danielle over the course of the season. But in this case, you know, Danielle, like, it just goes to, it's more like Danielle, you shouldn't be taking up all these things and expecting anything back from Lindsay because we all know who Lindsay is, we can all see it. And if you thought that you were anything more than a sidekick and that like the, the, the master of the sidekick is going to, it's going to go to battle for you the way a sidekick goes to the battle for their master for lack of a better term
Starting point is 01:28:05 I don't we never came out. Who is the dominant? Whatever the not who's the the main person the sidekick the boss But like that's just not a weird boss the heroes the hero heroes don't go to go to their sidekick the way that side kicks goes Back for their heroes that's right that man is not going to H.E.B. and getting you a cake You know what I mean? Sorry Robin. That's not what Batman does. He's saving you. Batman sends flowers to Robin's housewarming.
Starting point is 01:28:30 He is the butler, do it. But Batman is not gonna like go. He's not gonna go to your wedding in Pakistan. You know what I mean? He's busy. And that's the truth of it. So like yeah. Yeah. So she's losing it. She's still screaming. Lindsay's like, so if I'm so bad, why do you even want to talk to me?
Starting point is 01:28:53 And she's like, well, now I can see clear as day. We are done. Final nail in the coffin. I love when people try to pretend up. They're breaking up with me when they're already blocked on all social. it's hilarious. So Maya is grabbing Amanda's arm like, wow, because this is their Super Bowl. And I'm happy for them. Like, they're really enjoying it. I mean, all of ours, let's be honest.
Starting point is 01:29:12 We're all watching. Yeah, like, oh my god, oh my god, oh my god. So Danielle's like, we are done. And Lindsay's like, we've already been done, sweetheart. And then she goes, oh my god, sweetheart, oh my god, really? Okay, why are you allowed to yell and scream at Lindsay in front of everybody for 20 minutes But she makes a one smart-ass comment to you and you're this huge victim falling on the ground I literally I cannot believe Danielle didn't hasn't fall into the ground yet going oh my eye
Starting point is 01:29:40 Just give her two minutes so she'll be down on the floor. So yeah, Danielle is like you're a fucking monster That you won't even let me say that we're done first. I cannot believe that you already said word that you already called dibs on being done That is so rude. You're not going to ruin my fucking last weekend So that's what we're not gonna do and then he's like well you already did that for my husband She's so good. She's so good at this. It's like your husband. Woody Warding married now. Jesus, fuck that right.
Starting point is 01:30:09 So Lensy goes, well, you want me to mind it? And she's just, yeah, well, you, oh, happily, happily not invited then. And Lensy just leaves. And she's like, my God, like what a nut. I mean, this has to happen, Danielle. Goes around the corner and all the girls render her an embrace her and they're like we're here. We've got you ma Follows to the ground solving like come on This so over the top like Danielle could not have
Starting point is 01:30:44 Danielle has been just like, it's just a failure. It's like a really good, you're like watching a really good football game or something. And the fourth quarter, one team just starts fumbling and intercepting. And that's Danielle just flopping in this final act of the season, just losing all her credibility that she had. It's just just just fabulous. So then my is like, well, that's your moment, but we're all here for you when you came
Starting point is 01:31:12 out of your moment, because that's what friendship looks like, Daniel. That's what it looks like. So then Daniel and Carl, wait, Daniel and Carl. No, then, by the way, can we, while you figure that out, can we just talk about how funny it was that Lindsay said, well, that's what you did to my husband. Like, I love that she already accelerated them to husband and wife.
Starting point is 01:31:31 That is so Lindsay. Oh, this is Lindsay, who's talking to Carl. So she goes out to Carl, he's like, I don't know, oh, was it good? Do we need to leave? I will throw a t-shirt on a camera. Just tell me what to do. And she's like, um, she took me and pretended that she was gonna have
Starting point is 01:31:45 a civil conversation with me, and I just kept it calm and collected, and she hid in that I was like a chill. I was like, yes, she hid in that you were a chill, and I see as fuck. Yeah, really, I see. Nice work. It was work.
Starting point is 01:31:59 I was scared. So Danielle's like, the fact that we've all come such a long fucking way, and that like after that conversation that the people that were here for me were like the people who were eavesdropping in, so they didn't have to gossip to each other, they just knew it all from the primary source. It just means so much to me right now. And Sierra's like, yeah, we just all wanted to make sure she heard you, because it's been like a long time, come on, shut up, Avatar. Shut up. So Daniel's like, I just get so much love from you guys.
Starting point is 01:32:29 So then Lindback to Linds and Carl, she's like, and she was like a your smug face, like you have such a fucking smug face. And I can tell you don't care. And I'm like, yeah, I stopped caring when someone treated me. The way you treated me this America, she's the one who abandoned this friendship. Yeah, because of all of her own issues, right? Which are the following, and if you feel like, uh, filling in the blanks lunsy, I'll just
Starting point is 01:32:53 follow your lead and say exactly, and that's what I was gonna say. Yeah. She's like, not fucking smart enough to like, understand this right now. Gabs! Gabs! We have a new position officially available for you if you wanna come over and apply. Oh well, by the way, I'm glad that Gabby never arrives. Gab's just never comes. Lindsay just keeps trying to make this gabs thing happen and Gabby's like, no, I can't even believe I'm still talking to you. Can't give me another season. I'll hate you too. So the Danielle is like,
Starting point is 01:33:20 she's like still sobbing on the floor. She's like, let them have each other. I'm happy for them, but I'll always root for them. But I guess it'll be further off the sidelines. Danielle, just be bitter as fuck and say fuck them. Don't root for them from the sidelines, okay? You know what? Just stop trying, because in a certain way, she's still playing this role of like,
Starting point is 01:33:41 oh, I will still like you, even though you have been so mean to me. Just say fuck them. Say fuck them already, Danielle. No, it's the victim thing. She has to win as a victim. That's her whole point today. Is Lindsay?
Starting point is 01:33:54 Is the mean one, and she broke Danielle to the point where she was sobbing on the floor. And the girls are kind of bored with her already, you know, because like, they play as like their game climaxed. You know, so they're like, wow, that was fun. Okay, well, I'm gonna go out, betaple and stay clean flamingo, I guess, this was fun. And Amanda's like, okay, well then, you'll be sure
Starting point is 01:34:13 to catch in all those hugs that you need. And to be clear, there's only three available to you, so you're just paced them out. And outside Craig is like, wow, it was like such a war zone in there. Like it was crazy, like swinging from chandeliers, like they had to put one, like just in a blender to kill it. It's like, uh, Craig, you're talking about Gremlins or you're talking about the fight inside.
Starting point is 01:34:37 I'm not sure. Dan, Lindsay turned into a big ball and was like rolling after Dan Yaldon and Helen, almost smushed her up. It's not Indiana Jones, bro. Right, right, still knows, right, it was like rolling after Danielle, Danny Hill, and almost smushed drops. It's not Indiana Jones, bro. Right. Right. Still those, but I was like a lot.
Starting point is 01:34:49 Oh my God. Like Lindsay was like walking to the house and like just destroying everything. And I was like, I never knew Marshmallow could be so scary. You're talking about Ghostbusters again, Craig. Oh, yeah, I guess I am. He said to drama queen. So he's like, yeah. And she just started down and now she's talking to Carl over there.
Starting point is 01:35:06 And like Lindsay's a good fighter when she's sober. She's really good. And Carl's like, yeah, she can be wrong, but then like seem right. Like it's so weird. Ha ha ha ha. Yeah. And so, so then Lindsay is like still talking to me.
Starting point is 01:35:22 As soon as she started talking, I was like, here we go, this is happening. It's the same thing, like, oh, right over and over again. And I'm gonna get yelled at again. And then Kyle comes over and goes, hey, so Craig said it was like a war zone in there. Something like that. He said something about like,
Starting point is 01:35:39 like, bombs going off. And she's like, where? Oh, like Danielle, like, she just heard screaming at me. So there's like, that. I was like, oh, so it wasn't productive. I mean, unless you can figure it out, I mean, maybe you guys, maybe you guys can talk or something.
Starting point is 01:35:54 I'm really drunk. I was going, oh, right. He just walks away. So Carl's like, where do we go from here? And she's like, well, I mean, I guess we can sit in the deflated tiger that Kyle just left here. So we just sit there. Well, she,, I guess we can sit in the deflated tiger that Kyle just left here. So we just sit there.
Starting point is 01:36:06 Well, she knows Lindsey walks away because Kyle, because she's, she's, she's talking about Daniel. Yeah, she starts about Danielle and Kyle goes, well, here's the thing. And she's like, okay, anyone of you don't want to know, like, my opinion, then fine, I could take my game show elsewhere. Oh, so she walks, thank you. My notes are confused. And girls like, oh, she walks talk. Yeah. So I have a seat in the tiger at the
Starting point is 01:36:28 deflated tiger. So Danielle is to Maya and the friend who I thought was with Lindsay, but I guess was in I guess it was Danielle's friend. So Danielle's like, dude, I do anything wrong in that conversation. And she's like, no, I was listening. And you did not do one thing wrong. And Maya's like, Danielle, I would listening and you did not do one thing wrong. And my eyes like, didn't y'all, I would tell you honestly, I believe that she was like far more antagonizing than you were. How? She didn't, she didn't, yeah, Danielle was the one screaming and yelling and having a fucking fit.
Starting point is 01:36:56 Lindsay stayed calm. I guess you could still be antagonizing and stay calm. Liz, well, I think it all depends on how you view it. And antagonizing Lindsay would say that would use that definition like Danielle was screaming and then Danielle would say but she was so cold and dismissive So Carl's like well Carl, I like don't know like where we go from here. I like there was like There was like a car on a lot of in history of it all and I think that Danielle like
Starting point is 01:37:22 Like she like it's just like, like really struggling to deal with, like a lot of things right now, like, you know, like not being married and like not having a martial law and things like that, you know? I mean, she's not really Maxonista, you know what I mean? Like she's got nothing, Ross won't even call her back. So, because like, well, you think there's a world where you're not friends and he's like, totally,
Starting point is 01:37:44 and it saddens me to see this come to that? Like, I never thought this summer that would be the one friendship that would do wrong. By the way, your tiger is that. I just thought like, given that like, really so many of Lindsay's friendships have derailed over the years, I thought like, at least this one won't, but I guess this one did. So anyway, the problem's not Lindsay or anything. It's just like Daniel.
Starting point is 01:38:09 So Kyle's mad because his tiger has deflated because someone in his relationship didn't make sure batteries were stocked, which means he now has a free past cheat on Amanda. If they watch Vanderpump rules, that's right. The bad news were not sucked. And either was the toilet paper or the paper towels. So, okay, so then we got a Craig and Paige talking and Craig's like, what Danielle say? Did she shoot anybody? I mean, she had a machine gun.
Starting point is 01:38:36 Oh my God, when they poured the blood on her and then she started like throwing the couch around with her eyes and Paige is like, she's hysterically crying because she's morning to lots of friendship and Lindsay's out there like laughing and joking and we cut the lintiac I was I really would have liked a conversation between Lindsay and Molly like hi I'm Lindsay I'm Molly hi nice to meet you nice to meet you. Nice to meet you, Julia. You're like so youngly here. Julia. Coming up. Coming up.
Starting point is 01:39:07 So we see Corian Samping grow some more. I hate them. So then Danielle goes into the kitchen and sad music plays. And she's like, I'm having a last moment. And she goes to cry in the bathroom, you know, her mic. So we all hear it. So then paid and my insurer talking a serous like, well, I have to say, I'm really appalled with that conversation. And page is like, yeah, I think then,
Starting point is 01:39:32 y'all's coming to a realization about Lindsay that we all had years ago and it's traumatizing. Do you remember how traumatized I was? Anybody? Anybody? When I realized she was addicted to prune juice, I was like, wow, that really does happen at old age that was traumatizing so Maya is annoyed so she goes to get some water and she's watching Oliver Oliver is like flirting at
Starting point is 01:39:54 the party and so while they're talking they're trying to like do a post game report Maya can't focus she's just watching Oliver so she walks off to Oliver and they're watching her and they're like, is she okay? And Paige is like, well, I don't know if she wants to say it, but has she ever said I'm going to end it with him? And she was like, uh, yeah. So Kyle and Amanda are talking about how attracted there to each other. And then Craig goes on and on about how much the grill sucks outside. I love that Craig is makes himself the girl master but has still to this day not learned how to grill shit.
Starting point is 01:40:28 This is- This was kind of a great scene because Craig is just like talking, he's making a really uninteresting observation about the grill while Carl and then zero having a fight about pulling off bacon wrapped peppers or something from the grill because Craig comes up and goes, hey, so we were talking over there and you opened the grill and it was like all on fire and then you just like shut it. And I was like everything like, grill's on fire, but then you opened it again.
Starting point is 01:40:51 And like you were like, no, it's not. Like that's what that's like verbatim quote. And then while he's saying all this, when he's like, I'm gonna take it off the grill. Carl, are you gonna take it off the grill? It's like, take it off the first baby. He's like, I got a bit like stop. Like I'm going to get it off like,
Starting point is 01:41:03 no, but it's like burning. Oh, well, you want to cook them? No. All right, then like, I got a bit like stop. I'm gonna get it off like no, but it's like burning Oh, well you want to cook them? No, all right then like I'm just saying like I'm like a people blazer And I just want like the bacon to be like the best possible bacon for all the people in homes like hmm so then Kyle and Amanda are like kissing and talking about they want babies in the house They're like trying to end their storyline, but whatever their words are, it's basically like, hi, look at how nice we are together when we're wasted. Let's please always be wasted. I'm always going to be wasted, man.
Starting point is 01:41:32 I love fucking way. Always are babies wasted. I'm like, oh my God, I love us. That's our storyline. Then in the kitchen, Maya, Cory says something, and then Maya kind of like has a can of some sort of lover boy or whatever, and sort of like, sort of tries to throw the drink out of the can at Cory. And so then he like throws a drink,
Starting point is 01:41:54 but they're having like a little drink fight, and Paige is like, Cory, we live here, this is a home for clean flamingos. And then like they get into this like fight, but you can see that Maya's actually like a little, like there's like a little more like animosity behind this, like drink throwing a little bit. And so then Corey, like throws an entire glass of water
Starting point is 01:42:12 in her face and she falls over, but they're like laughing, but there's a weird energy about it too. I don't write anything that Corey's doing down. Okay. So then there's whackiness and you you know it's like party party. Everybody's like having fun. But then yeah, oh, I see here's a quarry notes. Quarry throw, Gabby throw chases quarry now and then throws pineapple juice all over the patio or whoever's
Starting point is 01:42:38 chases my hair. It was a whole stuff. But okay. Part of the show. I know. But you know what I really hated? So Chris starts picking up people and throwing them in the pool. But he's like doing it in that way that is like so aggro, I can't stand. Cause a lot of people are like, no, please don't. And they get thrown in the pool and they laugh. But I'm like, it's the same thing with
Starting point is 01:42:56 I'm a shetty with a tiger. It's like this guy who is now hyped up cause he's excited, maybe he's on something, but at the very least he's excited. And he like doesn't realize, he just never realizes how other people are reacting to him. And he just is like throwing people in the pool. And I'd be like, you know what,
Starting point is 01:43:13 if you fucking did that to me, I'd be like, I probably wouldn't say anything, I'd be like, I just like complain about it afterwards. You'd simmer. You'd be on a list, so I'm like, he would be on my simmer lists. So Maya finally takes all of her issues. Like come to the bathroom and cover her mics.
Starting point is 01:43:30 Okay, put your hand on your mic. And so you shouldn't be here right now today. Like you don't think that. And he's like, But I'm going to be here for you. She's like, but I know what you're doing. So just give it a fucking break. It's like, so she's like,
Starting point is 01:43:43 and now you're fucking with me and you're talking to girls behind the bar and you're like, I hear you, baby, I hear you. And she's like, just leave. And he's, but I want to be here for you. Oh, so you cheated on her. So now you want to be here at a party to make sure she's okay after finding out that you cheated on her.
Starting point is 01:43:58 Exactly. You fuck out. You fuck out here. What a fucker. Also like, great job covering your mic by the way, cause she's, all her audio was like this. Oliver, why would you do that? And he's like, well, the reason why I did that was
Starting point is 01:44:11 because I just felt bad. Like, what part of your mic were you covering? Was he just like on his head? Is his head just on his forehead or something? But, basically, he's like. He's wonderful to hear his part because he's a victim in his part. Here's this crazy person crying at him
Starting point is 01:44:24 when he's saying, I just wanna be he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, and I'm here for you. Okay, well, you can't stop it. Well, because she's saying leave, leave. So that's their thing. Basically, so she dumps him and he leaves. He slinks out. Yeah, so then Greg, Craig, Cory and Kyle, I think the Oliver right now just dipped out. So I'm like, oh, the parallels, I can't.
Starting point is 01:45:02 There's too many today. Dipping out, so it's about, whatever that word comes up now, we know. So then Cory is like, oh, that makes sense because Maya was being so aggressive towards me and maybe she was taking your anger out of me. Ha, ha, ha. So, of course, we've got to Cory to be that white guy,
Starting point is 01:45:23 calling Maya aggressive. Yeah, for a juice fight. Of course. It's very on brand for fucking Cori So then we go to more throwing in the pool. It's everyone Chris sucks Matt kisses Gabby page and Craig Finally kick everybody out. It's like bye. Goodbye. Clean flamingos says clean flamingo out goodbye, okay? This is not easy to upkeep, go home losers. And then Kyle is like, wow, this summer was like one for the books, it was like very different.
Starting point is 01:45:51 Like, I've known Lindsay and Carl and Danielle for like 10 years, so it really does bum me out that like we all can't find a way to be on like the same page right now. And basically, basically it all just ends with them all jumping in the pool and the question is like can they repair these friendships? Can they repair them? What will happen? I don't know but next time on the reunion looks like a full-on assault against Lindsay Hubbard so I'm curious to see how that all plays out. If my head's gonna pop off,
Starting point is 01:46:26 it might, but this was certainly fun. This was fun, it was good. And I think we wound up on the same page after all, which is just that, well, I'm Daniel. You, you were, there's the terrible confrontation that you had. Fail, that was a big fail. You failed.
Starting point is 01:46:43 But we still have a month festivists of reunion. So come back next week. Also, this recap is available right now, available on Patreon as a video. It will be available next week for free on YouTube as a video. So if you want videos and bonus episodes, join the crap and it'll man,
Starting point is 01:47:00 at levelhatopatreon.com slash watch what crap and also, get your live show tickets, because we're going to be coming out again in a couple of weeks. watch what crap ends also get your live show tickets because we're gonna be coming out again in a couple of weeks watch what crap ends.com we'll talk to you guys next time bye bye everybody watch what crap ends would like to think it's premium sponsors ain't no thing like Allison King Ashley Savoni she don't take no balone! She's not just a Sheila, she's a Daniella. Itch-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o It's Kelly Ryan. Megan Berg, you can't have a burger without the Berg! You're never alone with Lacey Montellone. Let's give a kiss Arino to Lysalino! There ain't no problem that Sarah Salvia can't solve you.
Starting point is 01:47:52 The Bay Area Beaches Beaches. And our super premium sponsors. The incredible edible Matthewsisters. Somebody get us 10 C's of Betsy MD. She's not harsh, She's Jill Hirsch. We're taking the gold with Brenda Silva. Erica, 500 days of summer. She's the Queen Bee, it's Sarah Lemke. We love him madly, it's Kyle Podd, Chadly. Don't get salty with Christine Pepper. Let's go on a bender with Lauren Fender.
Starting point is 01:48:20 My favorite Murto, Karen McMurdo. Nobody holds a candle to Jamie Kendall. Give him hell, Miss Noelle. Can't have a meal without the Emily side. Let's get real with Caitlyn O'Neal. We want to hang with Liz Lang. Can't have a meal without the Emily side. Shannon out of a cannon Anthony. Let's take off with Tamla Plane.
Starting point is 01:48:40 She ain't no shrinking Violet Coo-Tar. We love you guys! Hey Prime members, you can listen to Watcher Crappens' ad-free on Amazon Music, download the Amazon Music app today. Or you can listen ad-free with Wondry Plus in Apple Podcasts before you go tell us about yourself by completing a short survey at Wondry.com slash survey. Raising kids can be one of the greatest rewards of a parent's life.
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