Watch What Crappens - SummerHouse: Drunk In Love

Episode Date: March 29, 2018

Amanda thinks Kyle drinks too much; so they come up with a great plan: they'll go 1-for-1 with beverages. What could go wrong? Just another fun weekend in the "Summer House." Check out our recap! See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.Our Patreon Extras: https://patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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What happens? What happens when there's so much that happens? What happens when there's so much that happens? What happens when there's so much that happens? Rapids, who brought you a craft, but when you don't win the craft, you can't just watch. Rapids brought there so much that's rapids. Hey everyone, welcome to Watch Your Crappins, a podcast about all that crap on Bravo

that we just love to watch. I'm Ben Mandelker from BSIBlog.com and the Banger Blender podcast, and joining me today is Ronnie Carrom from trashtalktv.com and the Rosepricks Bachelor podcast. What's going on Ronnie? Well I've been Juney. How are you? So good. What a lovely day.

I know aren't you excited to talk about summer house today? Yeah you want a good drink for drink? Yeah let's go drink for drink for summer house. Before we do that first of all we're coming to DC next week so we're excited to see y'all there and then a few weeks weeks after that, on April 15th, we have a show in Irvine, California, at the Irvine improv. And we are going to be discussing the real housewives of Orange County classic episode, naked waste of dinner party.

You guys have to come. I mean, we're talking about naked wasted in Orange County, in the heart of Orange County. Oh, yeah, baby. So go to watchcraftens.com to buy tickets for that. And that's also where you can find links to get some of our merchandise, which is, we're sort of running out of that. So get it while it's still there.

And, you know, click around, have fun. So, but for today, today, let's go back to the Hampton's Carl. Carl, I got the Hampton's. Talks at my house, Carl. Carl, Carl, Carl, Carl, Carl. I wanna see you freeway, Carl. Carl, Carl, what if we get on this exit? I'm gonna be, I think,

but we're gonna be entering the Hampton's. Like, that doesn't even make sense, Carl. Like, how's it gonna work? L-I-R, Carl, Carl. L-I-R, L-I-R, Carl. L-I-R, Carl. So where does this episode begin? Well, I will tell you, Rose, do you have any macros on this episode? Macros.

I love a good macronate. A macronote, the macronote is that it's the second to last episode of the season. And things are getting heated between Kyle and Amanda, because the episode opens up where the last one left off. Kyle and Amanda, I just had a big fight where it's like, you are not fun. Summer should be fun. Amanda? Not fun. Not fun. She's like, I am fun Kyle. Kyle, a person that she's drawn. Her voice really does go way more into that. Kyle. Kyle. Kyle.

Look, look how fun I'm being Kyle. Um, yes. And Carl is kissing Lindsay. Wait, it's just yes, not fun. So Carl is kissing Carl Lindsay, the other Lindsay, the olive oil Lindsay. Carl. Yeah. And he's like, we're going to go out, gent Lindsay. and he's like we're gonna go out

gent Lindsay like yeah yeah yeah like this little laugh and he's like I'll be the other at first and say you smell it and he goes oh you nasty huh you nasty huh yeah you nasty so and then and meet by the way he finally comes out of his shell this episode and he's like, hey, Gabby, what do you want to do? And then Steven, meanwhile, he's like, we need to order an Uber to go to Travis' party,

he's like, I'll order. All order, Uber. And it's like, you know, like, Stevens really not like entertaining a lot, but like, the Steven and Gay average really have a really good thing going. So like, it's important. Yeah, it's like really good. Yeah, it's a good and it's a good one.

It's an important thing. It's like Martha Stewart says, it's a good thing, you know? It's like a bicycle. It's like you get on that and you paddle and it goes places. It goes as a bicycle. I'm not like I can try to do some of the bicycles. It's like more stable and I think it's a bit stable. I'm sure I can get to the other world. I'm sure the Stevens as a little more stable and I can get to be a little more stable. So, she's being all supportive and he's like, Lauren, I'm about to leave ya.

So, everybody but Kyle and Amanda leave the house. I'm like, oh God not again Because guess what Kyle does instead he gets into bed with his sneakers on Stop it Kyle Kyle. You know what? I'm a big Kyle fan. I support Kyle. I like Kyle He needs to stop getting into bed with his sneakers on. It's just not right. It's not right And Amanda doesn't come to bed and take them off So eventually his feet start itching and he's like, um, you know what's harder than being like, um, in a couple in summer house, being a couple in summer house when there's not somebody

to take off your shoes. So he goes downstairs to see where Amanda is and she's like, I'm looking like, um, a Kyle. Oh, Kyle, if you don't want to marry me, then I'm done. Stop feeding me bullshit when you drink. I mean, I thought there was gonna be, I thought I was gonna, the only reason I'm sticking this out

is because I thought there was gonna be a future, Kyle. I thought there'd be like weddings and babies and guac. Yeah, and he's like, there is a future. Like, no, he didn't even say that. He said, she goes, I, you were telling me what I want to hear. And he's like, I'm telling you that right now. And she's like, no, you're not.

Because he literally will not say what he wants. But he's like, what? I said it. I said it quietly and inside my head. And then I said, not. So this, I mean, while by the way, we get like a flash of Stephen and Lauren at Travis's birthday, just on like, camera phone or whatever. And then Lauren's like, hey, Stephen on like, camera phone or whatever, and then Lauren's like,

hey Steven, Steven, are you happy we came? Are you happy we came, Steven? And he's like, turn that light off. It's a great party. Yeah, Steven's just wasted. He got depressed, wasted waiting for the text back. And he's just showing up like, ha, turn that off.

And then it like, that like, 1 a.m. they all come back and now Steven's singing a totally different tune. He's like, I like Travis because he's so normal. He's funny, I have a few cocktails, I can change the perception of him. Yeah, he's like Alabama made me so insecure, but I meet, didn't try and get my face masked and sting me so So I'm going

to jump on this column right now. And so I don't. Travis's party was actually pretty amazing. A meat just like we're not shut up and just had so much personality. Well, a meat did a good, do a good job getting it, which is what he does. He gets laid. And Carl gets laid. They showed Carl making up with olive oil and they were standing up. It was hilarious, because you know, they're in the dark, but on night vision camera, Kyle's mouth is all the way open on her cheekbow. I totally forgot why you were calling her olive oil.

I was like, why is he calling her olive oil? I remember the Popeye moment that she's like, he's like, you look like olive oil, Jen. I don't tell you, look like olive oil. That's what my parents say. Ha, Jen. I don't tell you look like olive oil. That's my parents say. So then call call just starts puking. He starts peeping in front of olive oil. He's like, listen, Jen, I could drink 10 bottles of rosé. It'd be totally fine. But one questionable muscle and I'm

throwing up and throwing up repeat his necessary. Gents. Yeah. And he just keeps getting up over and over again. And I really like that he can get up to barf and still grab his dick. Yeah. And he's still thinking about his dick, even when he's about to barf. He's like, my dick look big, good, so I'm gonna barf. Get it all on camera, gents. Yeah.

So in the morning, he's like, all the oil to care of me all night. So normally, I don't want my guard down around girls, but maybe it was a good thing. Because I look like guard down and, you know, she really got to see what's inside of me. Like literally I was peaking it all up all night long. Questionable mouse rules. I let my guard down. I did keep my retainer on. So.

I'm gonna let my guard down. I literally let my guard down. So meanwhile Lauren's like, I need to call a gun's all later because we had a good time last night. Cousin. I'm in Lindsay's like, um, what's up? Like, we got a lane around here. What does it take to get lane here? I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, how about not getting

naked wasted and jumping all over people and trying to force yourself on them How about that Lindsay the box of hangover ed crumbs is like please stop talking to me right now I'm just mad at going to the cupboards and just talking to things The thing you're probably going away. She's like I've never seen a box run before out of my house But that one just said so I can't believe I just forced the toys from toy story to actually animate themselves While a human was present and run away. I can't even get what he hard You're a friend to me now let's get fucked So Kala and Amanda a harbinger of things to come, things to come. Karla's like, he's in bed with Amanda this morning

and he's like, I'm tired of this babe. Can we just please stop? And then there's two bottles of full rosé. Two full bottles of rosé on the nightstand. Here we go. I didn't even notice that. Full, hilarious. It's like a solo cup and two full bottles of rosé.

Like, okay, there we go. It's a sign. And then there's just general morning stuff. We see Danielle Face timing with her brother. She still has no job. And then Carl and I'll have oil are looking at his hands and he's like, I have sausage fingers. She's like, yeah, you do.

She's like, oh, you say I have sausage fingers. Oh, that's fine, Jen. You got to see the inside of me. The Shakespeare comes out of Carl. Love sausage fingers. You say I'm gonna have sausage fingers. I'm just saying it. I'm I'm trying to work on my sausage fingers.

I want them to be a little more slender because I want to learn sign language and work in my communication. Try to be right now. I can say it right now. I can say in sign languages. Do you want sausage fingers? Are you getting nasty sausage fingers? You get nasty sausage fingers.

Get nasty. I can always spell one word with my sausage fingers and that's M-O-M. Jens. Jens. So in the kitchen, Amanda made an avocado toast. Which is, I mean, there's no sign of Amanda Rebellion when she turns an avocado into toast instead of guacamole. Yeah, she's like I've had it with you. I'm removing all the fun stuff of guacamole and putting it on carbs. That's how I feel Kyle. And then I'm adding cinnamon on top Kyle. He's like, Amanda, Amanda, I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry. Please reconsider, make guacamole instead.

No, Kyle. It's avocado toast. And then Amanda is trying, Kyle's trying to like get back on her good side. And he goes, how are you, dude? And he goes, good, good. Cause he's talking like this in the morning. He's like, good.

Stop drinking pretty early. Hmm. On what clock was that? He's that good. Stop drinking pretty early. What clock was that? He's like got all the different clocks. He's like a bank. Hawaiian time. Yeah. I stopped it around 11.45 pm. Kona time. Germany just started trading, bro. Yeah. So now it's time for my favorite part of any episode. Yeah, so now it's time for my favorite part of any episode city montage We're back in the city Stephen's talking on a phone saying stuff about Travis is cool And he likes it. Maybe it's gonna get serious. I don't know

She's everything are you gonna get serious? She's like I like that he's like the lowest energy Mary Tyler more ever. He's like, I seriously, it's a heart attack, which I don't think I'll have, because my pulse is very low. He goes outside to throw his beret up in the air, but he just looks at it and he's like, ah, it's a beret. He just lets it fall out of his hands

and land on the sidewalk. The whole cast of maritime war show just tries to do a big group hug around him and walk to the tissue box. He's like, this is too much. I'm just gonna leave. Can I tell you something? This does nothing to do with this, you know,

and I'm sorry, but I need a show break for a minute. Yeah. Linkwizine, confuck yourself, okay. I have a cat to link you. Please. I have a cat to linkwizine commercial, and they're like, feed your phenomenal. No, that is mixed messages. Don't tell me to feed my phenomenal, okay? Like, I need to starve my like, assinal or whatever. Stop sending me mixed messages, okay?

I'm sick of all these weight things that are like, you just need to eat. No, I don't. You just need to eat right. No, I don't, because I will eat a salad and then a dominoes and then there's more calories. Stop fucking with me. Where's the diet that's like, don't eat.

starve yourself. Like, you know, Adderall, Quizzahine. Take me, don't eat, starve yourself, like, you know, add a roll of cuisine. Take me, don't eat, you know, get chalk mouth and get thin. That's the truth, everybody. That is the truth. You're welcome.

Thank you. Thank you, I think you really. Yeah, thank you. That was really strong. That was strong. Nobody's just honest anymore, okay? I know. I think that the words phenomenal and lean cuisine should not really be

paired personally. I've almost broken a tooth on their French bread pizza. I'm not kidding. Like you leave that thing in the microwave 20 seconds too long. It will break your teeth. Yeah. No. I don't approve. I don't approve. I do approve of Stofers mac and cheese that is delicious. Well you see see now, now I want that. It's a commercial I could sit through. I want it now. I want some Stofras Mac and Cheese very badly. Oh, me too.

Yeah. So. In the city. In the city. The Stofras Mac and Cheese, not the sleeps. So, the actual song sets was going like, I'm the next big thing and I know that you know it. And then it's like, I hope I got serious. I'm the next big thing and I hope that you know it. Hi mom

I still don't have a job. You have to say that mom. I'm a next big thing and I know that you know it. It's Lindsey in a blazer that doesn't fit it's like all pin together with safety pins and boob tape at something like the grungy gentleman Just someone call me I've been saved today. I didn't show them ready. I'm a sweater, you know Brunch gentleman. I'm a boss badge. So yeah, he goes on a date with all the boy a car. Well, well before Carl Oh, no, I'm sorry, you're right Before Carl Carl It's like a Bible no one wants to read yeah, so anyway. Yes, Carl

I'll go on a daytime date continue Yes, and he's like whoa you got the lip line Yeah, what does that mean you got the lifeline like is she's like, yeah, what's you? What does that mean? You got the lip line. Like, is he saying she has a mustache? Is he talking about her lip liner? I have this not starting out on the state. Cheers.

Cheers. I'm sweating. She's like, yeah. It's like, it's really hot. It's like a 80-buck degrees, Jens. It's like, it's like being in a room with a whole bunch of Jens. And you're like, whoa, Jens, let's get some room.

I'm a sweater, you know what I'm saying? And I'm not talking about the kind of thing you put on on top of a layer of clothing clothing to stay warm But I like how he's such innocent little boy carl because he's like last time I go He tells you last time I called the girl for a daytime date I don't know It's like it's a little in that way. Yeah, I don't know when there was. And like congratulations, is this achievement? You are like having wine in the day. Remember when you had first in yoga with Lauren Workis

during the day? That wasn't a date, that wasn't a date, that wasn't a date. It was just like, that was visiting yoga planet with your friend. Yeah, yeah. My friend, I was just like, you know, learning about a girl and what's her topping she likes. You know, like, you know what topic I like? Well, I'm my pro new girlfriend. I like all your weight. We wait on me, bro.

But all your weight on my yogurt, bro. So they talk about him barfing and she's like, why can't bear it? Like, what are you gonna do if you have a wife and he's like, oh, close the door. And she's like, everyone barbs. She's like, gross, don't talk about that. It's like everyone poops and peas. I'm innocent, I'm innocent and cute. I don't know these things. I'm innocent and cute. I'm pristine, I'm cold.

I'm farting right now, really slowly. It's like, please stop, please stop. No, I'm gonna go to a bridal show. I'm thinking of pooping there and just seeing what everybody says. Please stop it. This is getting too real. This is getting too real. Too real.

More life. Less stress more life. More life. Less, less vomit more life. So, Kyle and Amanda, hey, guess what they're doing? Making salmon. I'm eating salmon, I should say. Salmon is what the call sex.

Amanda, what have salmon? Kyle is so impressed with himself in every scene that he's just even letting him have a. Whoa, you know, still getting used to you coming in without me letting you in. Cause there's a single cow single cow making salmon and here you are. This is hard. So I'm just going to need a little time to get used to hearing that key turn in

the door and then look, it's you. I'm single. I'm going to party. I party. I'm gonna single. Oh, single. Yeah, and so they're talking about their relationship and he's like, yeah, like having a relationship in the summer. Like the summer house is like a lot harder than New York is like summer house and like people and then we're here and then like drinking there and not drinking here and like you know bird dogs, etc. And then I handled the he goes that by handled the transition perfectly transition perfectly maybe not I was like you're not the new president You know what I mean. Yeah, it's like just being nice to your girlfriends and the same setting you're in every year

Like yeah, it's not really that hard and Amanda's like Kyle is no longer the guy who can you can have so much fun with but then like I can still like still makes me feel relevant I'm like do you remember that last year he was just getting wasted and not dating you and calling you over for booty calls? Yeah. Like, you were a booty call. I mean, maybe that made you feel irrelevant because you had no Kyle and all of a sudden he picked you out of like in the middle of the night and was like, I want you. But I think you were actually, I think you've actually improved your relationship. So I know she's like, this is not the guy started dating him. I was like, do you want him back? Really? Because yeah, it's on tape. Yeah.

I was like, look, am I going to change in the sense that I'm a party animal and want to have fun and porrity and swimming pools? No. But I'm all for finding constructive ways of pacing myself, which is like, I'm still going to be wasted every fucking weekend, either becoming alcoholic with me or don't, which it becomes.

And so he makes the deal with her. He's like, what if next weekend we go drink for drink? So we'll be together. Yeah, that'll fix it. And she's like, okay Kyle, I'm like, oh, okay. Yeah, that was interesting. I mean, I like you guys, but you are not, you're not interesting enough to be the

who's afraid of Virginia Wolf couple. Okay. No, I don't think so. So now we go to a coffee shop where Lindsay arrives and the barista gives her something and it's like, enjoy. She says, thank you. Yes, I wrote down Y-E-W. Thank you a large ice cream tea

Thank you So in walks a rock Ever it like point water into a glass to get ready Yeah, you gotta lubricate this You gotta lubricate that that coffee flavored water. Yeah, you gotta lubricate this. You gotta lubricate that. Coffee flavored water. Yeah, you gotta do it. You gotta do it. So ever walked in.

So every beautiful. And the music stops. Yeah. He's like, thanks for meeting me. I just wanted to stop by saying, I'm so sorry for the pain I caused you. I heard from Carl while I was walking through the raspberries and the fields of poppies with villages burning all around me and baby screaming. Flowers, my city they just so upset.

I didn't know how much I'd upset you There was so much gunfire. They were coming in from all the angles. They said take them out. I tried to take them out But it was a trap as an ambush They were coming from all angles and all I wanted to do was send some flowers and say I love you. Nancy. I'm constantly evolving and Trying to get better I can't Because they're coming in. She's like, um, how many channels am I supposed to give you? Everett?

And he's like, um, you haven't given me a chance to broke up. Said, ah, what happened the day we broke up? I...well, I was in the bunker, shell went off. I was so rattled, I was like, I got a fucking girl, but I can't be lense. So I did a fuck girl fuck five girls I was like this with life is I don't feel anything. I want a fucking fuck so I feel something because I don't feel anything Cuz I got bombed a jet and they're left in You know about receiving that You know how the other thing that is, like, here I'm not leaving I've never had this much resolve

and then you know she's like now and then he starts to cry and he's like I leave you alone I don't want to but I will she's like bye and then she storms out they have sex five minutes later come on yeah probably and he's just sitting there at the table crying and it's so sad. And she's like, I'm a boss, Matt's some hired women, hear me? Rar! He's like, I don't even know why I came down to this coffee shop. It's not even Starbucks, I'm not gonna eat my stars!

Buh-hah-hah! I've got a purple star from the Starbucks. I'm a Starbucks bingo, but still. I'm gonna be like, I gotta please. And then the song is, And that's how we managed to keep the dream alive! I'm sure I'm just being go, but still. I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be like, I don't know where that came from and then the rest of that episode everyone just says I read I'm a sand that I'm like please stop trying to make sense of happen Okay, please stop turning into a facts machine You know the thing is they always have weird lingo on the show last year was all about the BBC's let's have a BBC

BBC BBC there's suddenly stopped with the BBC's the BBC had like a little cameo moment earlier But now it's like sandat, sandat. Cause a man, cause they're back in the Hamptons and they're talking about dinner and it's like, we're gonna do kabobs, Kyle. Let's go one for one with kabobs. The weekend that she's being drunk is not the weekend to have a giant pokey stick.

Yeah, let me get your throat over and over again. Okay, trust me, I've been there. It hurts. We also learn that Nick, the trainer, will be coming back. Hopefully Lindsay is going to be able to lock that down. Send it. She's like after my conversation with Avra,

I just need positive energy. Am I positive energy? I just mean a dick. That's my one, a dick. I just want a dick. Any dick. Any dick will do. Na na na na. Na na na na. A dick. I just want to be a dick. Any dick. Any dick. Any dick will do... La-na-na, na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na- Raising kids can be one of the greatest rewards of a parent's life. But come on, some days, parenting is unbearable.

I love my kid, but is a new parenting podcast from Wondry that shares a refreshingly honest and insightful take on parenting. Hosted by myself, Megan Galey, Chris Garcia, and Kurt Brownleur, we will be your resident not-so-expert experts. Each week we'll share a parenting story that'll have you laughing, nodding, and thinking. Oh yeah, I have absolutely been there. We'll talk about what went right and wrong. What would we do differently?

And the next time you step on yet another stray Lego in the middle of the night, you'll feel less alone. So if you like to laugh with us as we talk about the hardest job in the world, listen to, I love my kid, but wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen ad ad free on the Amazon music or Wondery app. So, a meat takes her suitcase out of the car and she's like, thank you on me.

You know what you got for that? And he's like, oh, and he forces a kiss on her cheek. Like, you need to really stop the ad girl, loomsie. I know. The bearer thing. I'm a barricade for you The good news is that Ashley is back and she's like, hey whoever said when you're married you can't be fun Don't let the ring fool you. I'm here to fucking send it Where you sending the ring?

I'm sending it Or I can't get married and have fun has obviously met me. Yeah, fuck that guy. I'm here Yeah, I'm here to like where I like the emotional post office like right now like I'm going to post office and I'm like I'd like to buy a stamp and they're like okay well there's a machine over there you can use you don't wait in line I'm like okay well I'm going to send it and I'm going to put my ring in it and it's going to be a sent ring and I'm like okay well how much is it wait and I'm like do I want to sort of fight sent do I want it do I want to send receipt what I want to do and I'm like all these options like flat envelope standard envelope I'm like wow, I'm going to send it.

I sent anyone who says you can't get married and have fun, did not know that the alpha stamp is now tensed more expensive. So I'm going to say that right now. I'm not going to send it, but I am going to send it. I'm here to send it. That's what I'm going to do. Anyone who said you can't get married and still have fun, didn't know that there are three different ways to send it

Post office you pass FedEx and I'll say you could use the HL. That's how forth I've got a major city to do the messenger wait a minute hold hold on to your seat belts fast nursing belts hold to your seats, okay? Taskrabbit. Oh my god. Oh my god. Taskrabbit. I love her. That's well. That was basically Flashing my titties the screen right now college. It's a task grab a Carl Carl Where's Carl? Where's house grab it? Like shut up band. Okay, so Carl is like cookie come with me bro come with me Cookie cookie Hey, John, let's talk. Let's talk about this

Hey, John, let's talk. Let's talk about this. Just because we have to remind people every single episode, this is the whitish show ever to be on television. Yeah. Okay. Like even more than the Brady brems. Because they go out to grill and he's like, well, who this? I'm going to start to grow with the paper towel.

It's on fire. Well, well, I'm smashing it out in the grass. Well, bro, like you could just leave it on them. On the grill. It's okay. I guess we were there worried about like flames or something or a cause like, oh man I'm still scraping up the grill. It's not ready and cause a whoop, bro, Jen fire Jen fire fire. Oh, oh, Farzaa, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura, Laura. So, oh my god, almost. So, the kitchen, I have wrote, no, this is the widest moment because her meat's like, twin person, your phone is going off, who is it, Justin?

And she's like, Justin, it's Justin, it's Justin. And she's like, I wanna read it, I wanna read it. It's not Justin, I wanna read it. That's right. I have a hot date at the gym, then I'm gonna meet up with Netflix and chill. Sunday. Sunday.

Sunday. Sunday. And Stephen goes, well, at least his tacky lines are kind of better than carols. And more lorries like, um, yeah. So then outside, Carl and Kyle are talking about Amanda and meets there and they're just going back and forth about like what What's going on with Kyle and Amanda everything and they're just talking and they keep cutting to meet just watching like he's always about to say something but he's not Just standing. He's not even trying. They're like a meat go walk outside now. He's like yeah, why? They're like because you're getting paid to do something, go pretend you're listening.

By the way, we should mention that Jezebel had an ode to Summer House this week. I don't know if you read that article. Did you see that? I didn't. I didn't. There was a whole article basically saying, yeah, it's like the most boring show, but it's oddly soothing and they don't do anything. And she the the writer she describes everyone and she's like and then there's a meat who Carl met Coachella that's like it's only description Yep pretty much pretty much yeah pretty much it's the most boring show you can't stop watching yeah so So Stevens like regarding this Kyle and Amanda deal, they drink one for one, Stevens, like, um, if you need to monitor your boyfriend's drinking that much, maybe you

should be one more fun and two, get another boyfriend. I'm kind of like, he's actually got a right. Like, you know, I mean, the biggest trap I feel like people fall into is hoping that the person that they start dating is going to change. Yeah, but then you start thinking maturely and then the guys walk in with those like circular grill things on their heads. It's like, maybe we're sitting too much thought into this. What are those?

Um, those are things so you can wash your hat in the dishwasher. So they're grill things. Yeah. Wow. So I'm going to wash your hat in thelings. Wow. So I'm sure hat in the dishwasher. Wow. So Kyle, Kyle's already going for a drink and Amanda's like, Kyle, you're already starting to drink without me. And while they're like starting to fight everyone dinner, the kebabs are ready. People are already sitting down at the dinner table and they're talking about it and it's being

like, yeah, it's a crazy idea. Yeah, like drinking one for one. This is not going to work out out. It's gonna be terrible Who's besting to go at blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah talking and she's like, Kyle, I'm talking about us right now. I just can't go. I'm embarrassed. This is happening from everyone. Kyle, I'm like you're on TV. It's way worse than you imagine. You're not doing this in front of six people, okay? You've got millions of people judging you. Well, hundreds of thousands. Well, hundreds. Well, thousands. Well, limpsies, mom. It's like that scene in a big business right? I'm a six. Fine, seven. In eight. Fairbugs. I just came age 12. Oh, except backwards. Yeah. So Carl was like, yo, Jen, what's wrong? Because like, this is a prank, right? And then Lauren goes, last year, Carl was a good time. I mean, I love a matter, but I miss old Kyle.

Where is old Kyle? He's still wasted every day and we can go into bed with his shoes on. Yeah. You just miss the room where Kyle is up without Amanda. Just say it. Yeah, you know what I miss? Reporter Christina Gibson reporting live. I for sure thought that she'd be making like a cameo comeback.

You know, they brought ever back. How can we don't have Christina? No, I think that bridge is just burned. I think Christina on the way out just lit a match and was like, bbb it. Yeah, when she grabbed that, when she grabbed that magnum of Rose, they're like never again. But she posted a photo very recently with Kyle on Instagram. So I'm like, there's still a relationship there. I don't know. I just, I feel like I'm saying this not because, oh my god, I love Christina so much. It's because the way the woman reacted to her was so hilarious.

It was that spark with people that galvanizes the cast. Also, she's just furious about everything all the time. And she can't communicate properly. I mean, she doesn't know how to articulate herself well. She's awkward, she doesn't fit in the way she's supposed to. And so it creates these hilarious, hilarious moments. It's like I was just dying all season without her there. Oh, Ben, don't worry. Everyone's reading for us, okay? Everyone's reading for us, Ben. I'm in Paris. I'm in Paris.

Hey guys, I got a job. I got a job filing, remember? I'm like Christina Part Two, remember last year, Christina always wanted a job while I'm like that too. And I got a job like quiet, calling a man or fighting. That was so funny. She's like, and then this is why this show is so different from Vanderpump rules. Well, there's like a million reasons.

But one of them is that she actually did get a job and it's a real one. And it's something I don't even know what the hell it is. The project manager's for an oversight of a tech company, hard drive. It's like people that are way smarter than me on a show that's way dimmer than me. I just love the mix.

Exactly. So Kyle and Amanda come back to the dinner table and call us like, hey, Jen, so we got some scoers, once some scoers, we got some couscous, And they're like that. I mean, I was like, it's fine. I'm not hungry. It's fine.

It doesn't look like guac to me as far as I'm saying. Hashtag, just saying. Mm-hmm. Hashtag about sending it. He's like, oh, couscous. Wanna couscous? Come on. Come on, couscous.

Yeah, be careful. You never want any bad couscous. You know, I could drink 10 bars of rosé, but one bad grand of couscous. I'm like, puking couscous. You know, I could drink 10 bottles of rose, but one bad gran of couscous, I'm like puking on that, you know what I'm saying, Jen? Ashley's like, what's up? What's up? And Kyle's like, well, it's just that we're adjusting

to being in the middle of a summer house in a relationship, and it's like a relationship, Kyle in summer house, Kyle and house Kyle and like Gwacomandin of a cottage of a stamanda, and they're like battling it out in the street, you know? There's paper towel burning on the grass like no one knows what to do Matt just like who cares no one's dead yeah the workers wins are just jumping like who cares Kyle Carl Kyle who cares Kyle like we like a well what's the difference like I'm gonna say like yeah

We got like never last time we're not just a beauty like she's really would I Like no I like just very mouth I can't like him I never really I like Josh I like Josh I like Josh I like Josh I like Josh I like Josh I like Josh I like Josh I like Josh I like Josh I like Josh I like Josh I like Josh I like Josh I like Josh I like Josh I like Josh I like Josh I like Josh I like Josh I like Josh I like Josh I like Josh I like Josh Josh I like Josh I like Josh Josh I like Josh Josh I like Josh I like Josh Josh Josh I like Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh Josh something I don't understand. Well, they're mad because Kyle is blaming them. Kyle is bringing, it's like they won't dare like what's up? Why don't you talk about it? They're talking about it on the run. Why are you pretending we don't even know about this? Say what? Well, at least they're trying to fight inside.

Now, you're asking them to bring their fights to the dinner table. Well, they were mad. Well, they were mad. No, well, they were just like, listen, like, you know, don't come to the table and be like, they're just kind of like, just say, I just just just get it over with so we can have a good time. That's basically what they're saying. Like, no, and then Kyle's kind of blaming them, which is kind of ridiculous.

And then so they're like, um, yeah, we're used to it. Like, stop, stop trying to like protect us. We're used to it. We dealt with this crazy face over here. It's like single-inzy You know Give him for a show to a cucumber on the table. I'll scare You want to make out scare? I'm just curious running. I like the scare running away. I like a scare

Scars pop skills. Just popping away. I want some the kiss. Guess I'll stop looking the bull of Scuse. Yes. Single ones are getting the grinds. So they're all like screaming, you know, they're all fighting with each other. And Carl is like, that's bullying. It's the work of the shingled to work. The work of the shingled bullies. They my guys mean girls mean girls over there Yeah, Carl. Please stop bringing bullying into anything. Yeah, and Carl's like well Maybe if everyone focused on their own lies which are in disarray then maybe they won't have to worry about ours I'm like how about this you all in disarray. That's why you're on TV

Yes exactly Carl's like we don't air your dirty laundry out in front of everyone. I'm like, you dirty people's laundry. Okay, you are the dirty laundry. You ask? Yes. Sweets stands. So I know what to talk about. What's everyone worried about tomorrow?

I'm wearing something white on my bottom. Like maybe shorts. Should I wear white shorts or white pants? Who do people think? Should I wear my waffle red and buck buck or how what do you guys think? Steven's like I think you should wear shot the fuck up. So they all decided to go out together. Yeah, they're all at the bar, which is shocking that we actually got sea footage from a bar

and Carl gets shots everyone is like I like to make a toast. You know at the end of the day, we're really lucky to have this friendship and be able to communicate so well and to work on communication, just be better gens overall. And I love this group people and like, let's have some fun.

Steven, don't throw out my shot. Steven, Steven, don't throw my shot on the ground. Steven, Steven, Steven, like slowly, it's like the slowliest I've ever seen the shot before out of a glass. Like, zoooo. It's like, I'm doing it. One, pour out of a glass. Like, zooooorrr I thought time heals everything, but I'm no scientist.

Like, I think. I think. I think that was a both thing. Well, it's barely say maybe I'm no doctor. I don't know. I'm the scientist. I thought that time heals all clocks, but I'm no number I don't even know what I'm talking about it this way. I'm just there even a even a time circles right two times a day like Carl It's a clock So I know you know, I'm no engineer so well, I don't know if I mentioned but I'm a product manager on no jupetto. I'm no jupetto so at home Carl, we see Carl face time in his room,

he's like, yeah, and then Steven just like poured out the shot. I was like, why? She's like, oh my god. I just, he's like, I'm pooping right now. Why'd you call? Everyone poops. And then Carl and Amanda are boating in the morning and they're like, oh, oh, and Kyle's like babe, you're too hot. You're too hot babe. You're too hot babe.

I'm suffocating. I'm suffocating. Carl's just your sneaker on your face. Why can't you take them off? So Kyle comes down in a mullet wig. He's like, I'm going to make this fun today. Mullets. down in a mullet wig. He's like, I'm gonna make this fun today. Mullets. They go to play tennis with Carl with his mullet. And Carl's like, hey, yeah, tennis. We're the good energy guys, right? Yeah, positive energies. Less stress. That's what life's right. Yeah, bro. Like Amanda, like, I don't even blame her for being upset because like, she got attacked at dinner and like, I've admiration for her because she stood up and she stood up for herself. And then she like still attacked like I get it bullied. Yeah, she really communicated well for herself For herself like I really appreciate that and like she's just growing and I get the feeling that her number one priority is

MOM so that's like a big deal and I'd let her put her weight on me if she wasn't already putting her weight on you bro So then this song is join me on the dark side to the Rose a party. Yeah. I don't think there's any dark side at the Rose a party. If you know what I'm saying, like you're real. Yes, exactly. Why does show on effort? Just leave the for dark out of it. Okay. You rebels. Yeah. So it calls like, oh, this Rose a isn't going to drink itself. If the Rose a is like, like actually I think I would prefer to do that Please just stay away from me. I'll drink my own self They're supposed to be dressed like rosé or something like in pink and Stevens wearing like some blue and white outfit from like gabsoucks

He's like um rosé can go fuck itself. Yeah So then we cut to we see flashes of everyone talking to different people and carls with some girls. Oh, I miss you. Last time I hung out with you was a coachella. Oh my gosh, this is not good. I know. A meet-side, can I see fun here, couch?

Can I join your reality show and just do nothing? Thanks. And of course, I'm sure everybody shocked Carl was friends with the bartender. Yeah. And Amanda's like, the fact that Kyle is like, a great job. I know the mean is good.

Where am I standing at? Send it. Really, send Spirco Accomole, because I couldn't make it today. So we started getting a little counter. So we started off Kyle and Amanda, one for one. They both have one. And then Nick, the Nick, the trainer arrives and he's wearing, speaking of like being, not wearing the floral dress code, I mean, the Rose

A dress code, he's all in this crazy floral shirt. It was like a magic eye pattern thing. I was like trying to cross my eye to see if there was like a hand doing a peace sign or something, but I couldn't make it work. Well, I didn't write this down, but in my memory, he's jumping out of a bush going, hey, he kind of was, he came out from behind a bush going, hey, he kind of was. He came up from behind the bush. He's like, hey, girl, hey. Oh, and then we get to watch Lindsay, you know, get all aggro, which is super fun.

Yeah. And Kyle takes the huge rose a bottle. And Carl gets this gaggle of girls around him. And he starts doing his dad, Carl jokes, which cracks me up. He's like, God, I tell you something a were a woman's perfume No Gateds. Yeah Lightning is lightning is brightening him a ride girls. All right. He just starts like all these dentists jokes

He's like I got a cabit to Time at the golf course guys, bros, gents. So now the Amanda Kyle counter, two for two, three for three. I mean, while we see Ashley, she's looking at us like, are there any cute guys here? Are there any cute guys? And they just cut to this like random, homely girl. I was like, this poor girl. Her name is Robert Karen.

So it's so sweet. Yes, that's the end. Steven's like, larm. Travis just texted me. I have such a nice guy. Yeah. And then Carl's like, hey, girl, if anybody want to give me oral, be, get it.

Get it guys. I'm flossing right now, like literally. Floss. So, so now we see Lindsay and Nick and Lindsay pulls Nick to set the song. So, the big question is, why haven't we made out? He's like, uh-huh. He's like, wow. Oh, boom. It's day starts to kiss.

He's like, not right here, girl. He's like, why? He's like, please, not without front of everybody. Please, please. Please in front of everybody. Please please That kind of girl who goes after what I want Like a pizza contract. He's like girl. Please listen. Here's what I want to say girl Listen, I like you. I like you a lot. I want to do Pilates with you and stuff like that But before we start making it, I want to know if there's like a feature in this. Listen, I like you. I like you a lot. I want to do Pilates with you and stuff like that. But before we start making it,

yeah, I want to know if there's a future in this. You know what I'm saying, girl? She's like, headed or quit it. He's like, please don't hit me. He's like, no, I'm saying I'm like, headed or quit it. He's like, I don't know if I'm like ready for relationship, but I love that you got the taco contract, but I don't know if I'm going to like pink tacos.

Do you know what I mean? She's like, I got the taco contract, that's I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, That's until he's empire that she's built it's all same. Meanwhile Amanda's now at five drinks because it's at four And now Amanda's at seven drinks and calls it five And see if I'm like apparently that can only got along West Amanda's like You love me Let me call yeah, oh You love me Let me call yeah. Oh

This is and then I was like this can't get more awkward and then they cut to Danielle doing an awkward grind with the ski v bar Timter Yeah, is that a duster that she's wearing is that adult like a sleeveless duster? I don't remember the only visual I have for this episode is Nick jumping out from bushes going hey and then running away again So now Amanda's wasted she can barely walk her t her tits falling out, which is a common theme in the show. And now Kyle, basically Kyle's learned that he has to get Amanda wasted first, so that way she passes out, and then he can go and get drunk too.

Yes. But it's going to be a really healthy relationship. And watch, Amanda's going gonna become the alcoholic. Yeah Exactly God bless her and he's gonna jumper like you have a problem. So it's like Being couple summer house in the summer house, but like one of us is an alcoholic one of us isn't and I'm not the alcoholic So bye. Yeah, because she basically passes out and she's out for hours and hours I mean that happens when you day drink. It's kind of like the worst. I hate the post day drink pass out. Um, and so I'm like, my, my, my, I have the tables have turned. Oh my God. This is all you. You know, just drunk. The table's not

turning. Um, new. There's the room. So, uh, Gabby arrives and I mean, it's like, Hey, so then the gang decides to go out and it's like it could they've been partying at the house now they want to go out and like cookie come out call call call call I'm gonna come out you're come out call call you're come out call call call I'm gonna do it do it call call call call call call and he's like yeah fuck yeah look at me I'm pouring a beer down my face getting all over the kitchen floor and I'm gonna clean it oh my god this is this is fun call this is the call I met. So it's like totally fun Kyle. And Daniel's like, you can't go out.

What does she wakes up? He's like, ah, so he keeps going into check on her every time with a fresh drink. And he's like, baby, make it up. Or take another half of your nap.

I just have another hour. Yeah. And then eventually like, he's like, okay, I'm gonna go out and he like goes in the room and the music's like He's like Amanda Not Amanda I thought it was gonna be like oh no like that ticket the hospital Ben said it was just like All right, put it on a hat. But Amanda

And he leaves her which I guess is the big drama. You laughed him about love on that one half way. He's like, oh! You know what, if you are over 22, sorry, that's life. If you got too wasted and you have to pass out, like what, you're supposed to, everyone's like night is supposed to be held hostage because you drank too much, especially after hectoring for like the past two weeks.

Sorry. If you say hectoring, does he know Gonzalo? Exactly. I really want to hear from Goods. I just really nice. I like hector. He talks about tribes. Those tribal things.

And that brings us to I guess our season finale fight, which is going to be about leaving Amanda when she's waiting. So we think. So we think. So they're leading us to believe believe and That's the end of for this episode we got next week is the finale and Based on Instagram it looks like they summer house gets an actual reunion this year, so that's that'll be fun You guys thanks for listening tomorrow. We are talking married to medicine. We're speaking of reunions

We're gonna address the third episode and then we are slated to have a guest. So tune in and buy tickets for Irvine by going to WatchYourCrapins.com. And have a wonderful, blessed Thursday night. Yes, everybody. We will see you soon. Bye. Happy Puzzle Run Easter to people too. My Irvine.

Huh. Happy Puzzle Born Easter to people too. My Arbato. Hey, Prime members, you can listen to WatcherCrapins Add Free on Amazon Music, download the Amazon Music app today. Or you can listen Add Free with Wondry Plus in Apple Podcasts before you go tell us about yourself by completing a short survey at Wondry.com slash survey. a short survey at 1dry.com slash survey.