Watch What Crappens - Top Chef: Puttin' On the Ritz

Episode Date: March 17, 2023

Top Chef sells its soul to Ritz crackers before moving onto a humble rice challenge. Crackers and Rice. Did you MEAN to title your autobiography, Gail? This week's bonus is a Below Deck catch up and a talk about cooking shows. For our bonus episodes and video recaps, join Patreon at patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens Tour Dates: https://www.watchwhatcrappens.com/2023-cheater-brand-tour/See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hey, Prime members, you can listen to watch what crap ends at free on Amazon Music. Download the app today. This episode is sponsored by Uber1. We've all used Uber for rides, and I love using UberEats for food delivery. Okay, hello. I mean, I kind of live off of it. But have you ever heard about Uber1? Uber1 is a membership that helps you save on Uber and UberEats. With an Uber-1 membership, you get exclusive member perks, like up to 10% off UberEats and a $0 delivery fee on eligible orders. It just makes sense. I'm always getting Uberes.

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Taxes and other fees still apply. Introducing the new audible original breakthrough. The genre redefining audio only series that strips away the superficial to reaffirm what matters most, pure talent. Featuring celebrity judges Kelly Roland, Sarah Bareilles, and host David Diggs. Here every step of the musical journey has five underscored musicians battle through a series of high stakes singing and songwriting challenges for one top spot. It's musically gifted as they are artistically unique?

Each finalist is driven by the same dream, to become music's next must listen. But to break through they'll have to dig deep, pushing their vocal, songwriting, and recording chops their absolute limits while keeping their feet and emotions firmly grounded. So who will break through? It's time to find out! Join Kelly, Sarah, and David on a musical journey unlike anything you've ever seen. This is Breakthrough. Listen on Audible or wherever you get your podcasts. Go to audible.com slash breakthrough. Follow along using hashtag BreakthroughXAudible. I'm Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, Crab, C Hello and welcome to watch what crap is the podcast. Oh, that crap. We love to talk about

on you, O'Bravs. I'm Ronnie and that's been over there. How are you, my little Benoony, Bon Tuni, Pontalooni? I am so great, Ronnie. How are you doing? Good. Good to hear you, everybody. This is Top Chef Day. We are extremely excited because we love Top Chef. Okay, we are putting Top Chef on Friday this week and we are putting Real Housewives of Miami up on Monday for the simple reason the Top Chef is sweet and gives us a screener and Miami doesn't okay. Yeah, so that's how it works. That's how it works. It's worth that just logistics for us that way we can have a life So thank you to Top Chef also for that. But we are not ditching Miami. Of course, that will be on Monday. So our tour is still going on

through June. This month, super fun month. We've got a couple weekends coming up to finish it out. We've got Toronto. No, that's wrong. We have got Denver Salt Lake City Seattle and San Francisco. So the next couple of weeks go get ticket links at watch at crapens.com. You can also find our Patreon link. That is where you find our videos and bonus episodes. It's set it up. It's set it up. Later, after this month, we're going to be going to Toronto, Philadelphia, New York City, Washington, D.C., San Diego, St. Paul, Chicago, Columbus, Boston. We're going to finish out at the Foxwood, Casino, and Mashin Tucket, Connecticut. So thanks for everybody who's come. We love meeting you

and can't wait to get back out there next week, baby. I know. Do I sound weird? I just move my laptop by accident and I don't want to have a situation Where I have to go into chipmunk voice again. Am I okay? Am I normal to the world? You're good? You're good Yeah, I heard you do something over there, but I heard a zip and then I'm so weird It was okay full transparency. I was removing the laptop stand from beneath my laptop and it probably sounded like I was butchering a cow removing the laptop stand from beneath my laptop. And it probably sounded like I was butchering a cow. So this episode is called Bryce, Bryce, Baby, two-gale, two-gale.

It's all about rice. So we pick up loving this by the way, loving the season so far, two episodes in, absolutely love it. But we pick up, we're in this do-room after the elimination from last week at Buddha is sitting around saying, Samuel, leaving really speaks to a lot of what this competition is about. I mean, he was the winner of Top Chef France.

And if you thought about it, you would have shaped his food like the Eiffel Tower. His loss is loss. On top, Seth, you have to be un-the-bowl every chill. Thanks, Boota. Guess who these people are that you've talked to, all Top Chef winners. Okay. Or people who have almost run. They also know, okay?

Or Sarah. They may not have won very many teeth, but they came very close to winning top chef Sarah. Sarah's like, yeah, the last dish that you put up that counts. Don't you mean the last weed that you grow and put on your plate in your case? Yeah. So then we go back to the hotel and we get a Sarah monologue. She's like since top chef 16, I've had two children. Lula and Hayes, wasn't she on like a year ago?

What was she on? I feel like Sarah's very recent. I know, I feel that way too, but you know why? She's not, but there was a girl who had Sarah energy on the last one who lost to Buddha. She was like a finalist. But like, what do you think of back girl? You think of Sarah to at the same time. Oh, not me. I'm a Sarah lover. I only think of Sarah. And it's for reasons like this. I've got two children now named Lulin Hazel. I'm still breastfeeding and I will continue

to pump and send milk home to my husband to feed my children plus add on top of crops while it's not grown season. Because I want to show people that you can have a family and be a chef also that they should trust the postal service enough to carry human milk to babies. But surely isn't dangerous at all. I'm like, what the fuck kind of Kentucky bullshit is that? Okay, get some damn formula sending a milk to Kentucky from London. Come on Meanwhile, you know, there's some bougie late like Like wow sending

Brass milk to Kentucky from London, but there's some bougie lady being like oh, I get my breast milk imported from London actually I wouldn't respect that more. If she said listen I have two children Lula and Haz, and I'm still breastfeeding. Just a show I can sell my milk to other babies to make a profit while my kids are on goddamn powder because that's called capitalism. Okay? Welcome to Kentucky or something. But I don't know.

I worry about your food standards. You know, how come restaurants have to go through a grading system, but breast milk you could just put in a fucking postal box and send it overseas. Just sloshing, sloshing around them, people mail. It is very cool. She's doing that. So then now they go to the kitchen and perhaps good morning, non-famous people who here hasn't been to power still.

Wow, Sarah, you didn't go to power last night. Hey, Sarah, you know how you put things on top of crops while they're not growing. Well, this is called a crop top. Please don't try us great breast milk or weeds on it. It'd be really nice. Okay. Everyone, please give a warm welcome to this week's guest judge, Michelin star chef, Sam Tiago Lastra, his restaurant, Cole, right here in London, is way to expensive for all of you.

So here's a slideshow, tender eating. He's important enough that he has his own gel dish-watching mat to stand on right next to me. And notice that. And his restaurant, Cole, right here in London, is the only Michelin star restaurant in all of the UK. There's a reason the initials for this place are, uh, gale was so excited to eat at coal mainly because she was excited to try eating charcoal

for the first time raw. The first time I told gale about that restaurant, she said, wow, the same place I buy all of my dresses. So there's not an apostrophe S stupid, okay? You ate that on the way here. She's a big fan of the low-on-con rap collection. Anyway, chefs, who's ready to crack the next quick fire? Whether you're going to a nice meal, that's right. You're cooking with crack Whether you're going to a not going out to a nice meal or just visiting a friend Sarah can't afford it The way people welcome you is just by offering you a little bite to eat Gales worse worse. A little bit. Something Gales never tried. A small bite.

Yeah, the way for people to welcome you is a small bite or a squirt of breath milk. Am I right, Sarah? Please put that away, Sarah. Please. We want you to make us the perfect amused bush and using some of these unique ingredients But you can only choose one ingredient and your bite needs to fit on hold on A handy wife from my friends at handy wipes So it's a rich cracker challenge. That's like I Oh, so it's a Ritz cracker challenge. That's like, I love when we do this, when we bring our American reality show to London. I'm like, no, everyone cook on crackers.

It's crackers. Tomorrow, Velvita. Yeah. I like that Ritz cracker. I love whoever is working over there on the ad team because they're like, listen, we're going to be part of a challenge and we we're not gonna just be some little, oh, put it on a cracker, then we want you to mention Ritz every moment, and this guest judge is totally into it.

He's like, I didn't really cook until I was 15, because well, Paddena said some upright. She goes, who grew up with Ritz? Who? Oh, sorry, Sarah, not you. I didn't say pebbles, I didn't say pebbles from the ground. Ritz Cracker, oh, Santiago, you also did, tell us about it. He's like, tell us about your vital memories involving the Ritz Cracker family of products. Well, I didn't really cook it until I was 15. And I went to a supermarket and I saw this reached Cracker Box.

And there was this recipe for a crab dip. So I made it for my family and they like it. And I got a little bit of zest. Are you saying, if it weren't for that box of rich crackers, you wouldn't be a chef. You wouldn't even have a Michelin star. Are you saying the road to a Michelin star involves a Ritz cracker box? It was like I would be a banker or I might have married you in that life. If you were 60 years older, anyway, chefs.

Wow, you know what have been even worse? You being a cashier at the raw stress for less. When Gale walks in, thank God for Ritz. Ritz is on a mission to make the world a more welcoming place. This is almost as bad as those M&M bags. to make the world a more welcoming place. This is almost as bad as those M&M bags that are like, we are turning our logo upside down to subvert the paradigm with M&M's. Which is a real thing, by the way.

I know, we saw that this weekend. Where were we? Atlanta. I mean, look, I said, yeah, it's just such a funny thing. We want to sit for the paradigm and turn things upside down for women courtesy of M&Ms. That way, whenever you grab the M&M bag and you take it out of the pantry and M&Ms fall all over the floor, we can all together say in unison, goddamn women. together saying unison goddamn women. Sisters are doing it for themselves. Literally spilling out men's everywhere because we turned the bag upside down. By the way, thank you for Eminem's packaging to show us that sure some women are sexy green M&Ms, but some women like wearing glasses and other

women with sneakers too. Wow. Wow. Try that on, Ritz. Anyway, Sarah M&Ms are chocolate candies that you pay for. Poor Sarah, she thinks they're called WW's now, which is the whole other organization. What are MGM's? It's a movie studio, Sarah.

Please be quiet. Anyway, Ritz is changing the world with crackers, okay? So we want you to transform. Ritz crackers is on a mission to make the world a more welcoming place because it turns out the way you solve racism is with Ritz crackers. So we want to transport us. We want you to transport us around the globe on your magic Ritz carpetsers. So they have to choose some unique ingredients, okay? And there's some jackfruit there.

There's some yeast extract. And Padma's like, since Rift is so versatile, we thought we would put that to the test. I mean to put you in groups of three, okay? Stupid, stupid, stupid together,, poor, poor, poor, together, unfameless, unfameless, unfameless together, and gross, gross, gross. But this is not a team challenge. You'll be going head to head within your group. That means you'll have 30 minutes to make an amuse-boos using not one,

but all three of your terrible stupid gross ingredients. So just to recap, the Ritz cracker family of products wants to make the world a more welcoming place by pitting you against each other and not having to work together. Country versus country. Thanks Ritz. So silly of my favorite, because I don't get it. So silly on my favorite because I don't get it. And she tells us. Too many.

Yeah, too many ways for one Polish girl. Come on. Can you put the potato on Ritz? Yeah, this is a little, maybe it's just the way they've written these explanations, but it's too much. Mad because we will pick our favorite amuse speech from each group and then we'll pick an overall winner from our five favorites and then Ritz Cracker will make love to the green Eminem and then Rida results upside

down and the upside down number will be the winner. And then we're going to put two its crackers on Gail's eyelids while she's asleep. Wake her up and tell her she's lost her vision. Usually she uses pepperoni. So this is really going to throw her for a little. Not only is immunity on the line, but your dignity. Okay, everyone's time starts. No. So they get to cooking and Luciana is using wasabi capers and plantains. She's on that team and Dale is on the same team and Dale's like I have zero experience with plantains like we know, Gail, you know, I'm a Dale. Sorry, we know And then Victoria Victoria is on a team that has there's one team that has yeast extract, hypyschis. And what was the third thing they had? Was there a thing come quad maybe?

And it was like, um, a biscuit herbal drink from hypyschis flowers is what maze making. And then she's using the yeast extract. I don't know. It comes back. I have it in my notes later. And then a Mars on a team doing Botarga, Botarga, and Oyster Leaves, and the Kia Peppers, and Amar's very happy because they work well together, and Bagonia is like, I like working with Botarga, because my name is Bagonia, and sort of like Botarga.

It works. And Gabri is smelling the jackfruit, like, beautiful. Which I've never seen anybody do that with the jackfruit. Doesn't jackfruit smell like feet? That's durian. Like that. Yeah, but they look like that. And then Don, Don's talking about how after the first top chef, she got like so many good responses about her food and that she's opening up a restaurant soon. I was like,

okay, so this is your last episode. Got it. I'm just a poor Don. You know, in the last episode when she's like, you know, the first, when I first did Top Chef, it took me four or five challenges to get comfortable. And I hope I'm afforded that grace this time. And I was like, oh, not looking good for dawn. It's like, she's gonna take me five challenges, guys. And can't. Won't be a problem. And then Sarah is frying crackers. And she's, she's been working with like,

coarse radish and goat cheese and guajillo peppers. And she says, yeah, well, Ritz crackers are such an important part of Southern because the, not only did I grow up eating Ritz crackers, but we serve them in my restaurant. Shucker! Sorry, I continue. Wow, what is that five stars in Kentucky? So Canada smiles like, hi, I'm the catering company for years, and I'm used to making small bites. So I'm going to take guahillo peppers, cheese horse radish and more importantly a semi-confused smile to compose this tiny little amuse

So they're just like cooking and cooking and Dale is decided he's going to use like the plantains in his batter for making Efficient chips and like May is feeling good about everything and You have the time that Frenchie was here left five minutes. So they're plating, they're doing all sorts of cooking stuff. I don't really write down notes about this. It's just like hubbub in the kitchen, you know, hands, hands up crackers down. I said on the floor, Sarah, I'm just kidding. Sarah's top-juggling those ritz crackers. I know it's an essential part of the Kentucky arts program, but now it's not the time.

So Bagonia missed one. She didn't have time to play one, which is sad, because I love Bagonia. And Padma brings up Sarah, Nicole, and Sylvia, come on up. And Santiago's like, I'm so excited. It's the gel mat. I know. Don't let it go to your head. Don't wear.

You'll soon be very disappointed by all these normals soon enough. So Sarah's, Sarah presents a brown butter and guajillo fried cracker with goat cheese and pepper jelly and apple and horse radish. Man, and then we really will fry fucking anything. We are ridiculous. We are collectively ridiculous. Brunger cracker. And Nicole makes Nicole's Canada smile. And she makes grilled by the day with goat cheese and horse radish and salsa matcha.

And Sylvia does something on a pillow of goat cheese. And so Pat and I was like, wow, all of these are delicious. This is going to be like Tom and he's around me really, really hard, but only for a couple of minutes. Come with me, Santiago, turn around. Let's pretend like we're in a different room. And so Santiago, let's do what I do, what I'm with my good friend, Ali Wong, separate ourselves from everyone else and talk. Let's talk to Gale's best friend, the booze bottles. Because for whatever reason, that's what that wall is decorated with.

It's all booze. So we just hear them sing little things. She's like, different notes. And he's like, yes, little goat cheese layers. Layers, layers, notes, layers, layers. Jack, free to my right. So many notes. I mean, it's like, yes, below goat cheese layers. Layers layers, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, America for infiltrating Britain with these risk crackers. Oh, so they're favorite belong to Nicole Canada smile. And so Santiago's like, it had an unexpected intensity. You know, she's like, yeah, I sure do, buddy. I sure do.

So then unexpited intensity. Oh, I sure know, we've all seen gal after a dress barn sale. So then we see Tom, Amar and Begonia there called up and Tom had no it's like, wait, what happened, Begonia? What happened? And Begonia is like, I was in another world. And Padma says, you ran out of time. Is that what she mean by that? She goes, yes, it was really stupid. Okay, well, tell Santiago what he's eating, because obviously I'm not eating

your stupid food that checked you long. I love that they can't even half it so that she can taste it. I know. Padma's such a baby. And so the gun used like, I mean, I know that she couldn't still win, but just so you could taste it, you know.

And I began you're like, it's always sort of leave most and a buta-ga and Santiago's like, I love the flavor of the sea, and Padme goes, I love seas. I wish I could taste it loser. Wow, I'm gonna be like, gal at an exclusive Hollywood party. Wondering what it's like.

That's me right now. Now be gone, yeah. It's time for commercial. It's time for a crapence. If you're hiring, you know what it's like to deal with economic uncertainty. And now more than ever, it's really important to hire the right people faster and more efficiently because you gotta keep the overall cost down. And thankfully, there's a hiring partner

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I'm going to say something scandalous running. Go on. Plants are meat. And not only are they meat, they're delicious, especially if they're from impossible foods. They taste like beef. Exactly. Impossible is making meat history this summer. Yeah, they are. Summer of impossible.

I am so excited to be spending time, cooking my summer foods, all that good stuff, and guess what? We can use impossible sausages, impossible brats. I mean, it's gonna be a great summer for impossible foods. Impossible beef is made from plants and 19 grams of protein per serving, and it's better for the planet. And it's meat!

Plant meat! Correct! So, if you're looking for something to grab for your grill, grab some impossible beef. Summer of impossible. Start making meat history today, just head over to the meat aisle at your local grocery store, grab some impossible beef or patties and get grilling. So a mar makes a smoke-cada, a pathocada, mustard seeds, and shape a targa and a pomegranate. And I thought I wasn't going to eat a lot to learn because she like stuffs her mouth. Wow, it's great to walk in gale shoes for once.

Just kidding. She's never thought she wasn't going to eat a lot any day of her life. It's literally on her vision board every year. You know, I asked if gale to come over one day and make a vision board. And she just, it was just ice cream. It's all she had. Ships the back as a six box.

So, so now they, so now they go back to the, Tom has a shrimp car. Tom, the German guy's like, these shrimp cocktail, my way. Like, why is this shrimp cocktail wearing a leather harness? And Tom wins. He gets the best one. The last time it was very yummy. Unlike big own. Yeah. Hey, begone. Yeah. Guess what you're going to be doing. Once you get kicked off of this show, it's the first three letters of your name. Get used to it. Me to have to take out on the street with you.

Had dare you not feed me. used to it, me that had to take out on the street with you. Had dare you not feed me. By the way, I have to say, I also love the snippets from the celebrations where it's like, yes, the ratio. Ignored. Alone. Did you see me?

I'm making the bed joke. Sorry, me. I interrupted the other me. Did you mean to interrupt me see me? I'm making the fucking joke. Sorry, me. I interrupted the other me. Did you mean to interrupt me, me? Yes, because I just couldn't wait to hear what other me had to say. The ratio. So the next group comes up.

It's Sarbel, Luciana and Dale, and their ingredients are wasabi, plantains, and capers. Which actually have to say go together better than some of the other ones. Yeah. I guess. So, Charbells, Charbell made a sauteed corn and capers with plantain, which sounds lame as hell to me, like sauteed some corn. And Dale made plantain fried cod with wasabi, caper, aiole, and fried capers. And it's actually looks really good. Yeah. And Pavana goes, I've never seen a plantain use

that way. Of course, I'm referring to Sarah in the corner using a plantain as a harmonica. Bravo! And Luciana did a plantain salsa with fried capers and wasabi and their favorite is Dale. Wow, congratulations Canadian. So now the next group has to deal with Yiseks, Cometquat and HiBiscus. So it was Cometquat and it's big twar and me and Ali. This one's crazy. This one's crazy.

This is one of those. It's just not okay. Yeah, it's just not okay. Yeah, it's a weird one. And Pam is like, these are all so different. And you get also deeply unappealing. And of course, I'm talking about the chef test. And say, am I right? And May was smart.

She made like a little spicy jam, which of course goes really well on a cracker. Right? It's like a cracker challenge. So she ends up winning. And I was like, wow, Meg, yours was really different. And you, for they understood the proportion of crack at a topping. Reminds me the time when Gail actually took Ritz crackers and put them in her hair and said, I'm starting a fashion trend. I said, you'll never start a fashion trend, Gail. And then I left her in the elevator and walked away. She's unfortunately, she walks straight out onto the streets of New York City and pigeons attacked her immediately.

I like to think was, I warned you stupid. As I watched her from the window of the print and club having cocktails with the Peter De Younger. Dear friend, she. So next up, Gabri Dawn and Buddha, they had Jackfruit, Tamrant and Caviar cream. I'm sorry, I'm still laughing. Because I've now, I'm just imagining a situation where that all happened and like for whatever reason, Gail did not take the elevator up the principal. It went out on the street with the interpreters.

Like, what happened? Why did Gail not join for the Peter New Year? So Jack Freightameron and Kaviar Kreme, this sounds extremely difficult to write. So I'd would have made Veil Tartar with Jackfruit Tamron and Cucumber, which I mean, this should just sound crazy. Crazy.

And when they come up to the, they walk up to the table at Bamaka's last, but I know not least, just kidding, the leastest of all. You guys are like nothing, stupid faces. So the winner is Gabri of that one. And she goes, okay, the winners from each round were Nicole, Tom, Dale, May and Gabri. And our favorite was surprising, unexpected, delicious, and it belongs to him.

And belong to a woman who really loves old, maybe men's flower shirts and could possibly work at the hamburger hat. May. I love May. She wears the same kind of shirts I do. And she's so sweet. I'm like, I love your wardrobe. We have to say wardrobe.

So Pamela goes, May, you utilized the three ingredients you had beautifully. And not only did you just win immunity, but you won $10,000 from our friends at Ritz who just solved everything in the world. Congratulations to Ritz crackers. Congratulations on the world's piece. Brought to you by Ritz, May. Hopefully you can stop at a blast or on the way to the next challenge. May, you have been firmly invited to the United Nations where you'll be speaking to a joint group of all the nations in the world to tell them how

you're a muse-bush on a Ritz cracker solved everything. Congratulations. I suggest you call your speech, hey, let's get this world out of a jam. Shall we? You're welcome. All right, chefs, you did great, but this next challenge can get a little sticky. That's right. It's a booger challenge. Now, we're here in England and that's why this challenge is going to be sticky, not like Toffee pudding. That's the second weekend of Rochie's did a misdirection. Last week she goes, this challenge is going to be easy peasy, but it won't be a mushy

peas challenge. And now she's doing sticky, not Toffee pudding in England. I'll talk about the fuck. And now she's doing sticky, not toffee pudding in England. I was like, what the fuck? No, it's just boogers. We're going to give you boogers and one other ingredient and you're going to have to make them delicious and you have to serve them off the tip of your finger.

After 19 seasons of Top Chef, no ingredient has caused more chefs to pack their knives than, well, scallops probably from the freezer section. Let's be honest. But the script says, not being friends with David Chang. So these guys bring in these huge tables of all the different kinds of rice. And Luciana's like, rice is so important in Brazil. If you go to someone's house and there's no rice, we think what happened in the kitchen? I've never seen such a sexy chef without rice.

That's what happened in Brazil because everyone's sexy there. So Padma's like, chefs, please welcome your guest judge from Top Chef, not America, it's Laurena Musake. So I totally don't hate her at all and don't present her for trying to be the South African version of Padma. Welcome not Padma, how are you? Wow, it's a very beautiful woman. I don't know what to do with this right now. I'm feeling a little threatened. No, what to do with this right now? Feeling a little threatened. No gel mat for take away the gel mat. Wow, Lauren is so nice to see someone with their feet touching the ground literally. So Lauren is like thank you so much for having me.

I'm super excited to be here. And Sarah's like, wow, I'm starting to see a theme. It's that top chef reaches all parts of the world. It's fun to be able to cook for so many different palettes. Oh, Sarah, you just learned about television, didn't you? Sarah just learned about franchises. She's like, wow, this is crazy. So, Pat, I was like, rice is a staple food

all around the world. Sarah, stupid. I also know I'm laughing because I wrote I wrote up pretty much the same thing stupid. Rice dishes can be different depending where you're from and Lauren is like you have to get the water to wash ratio perfectly. Yeah, take some advice from me who got her crack or to jam ratio perfectly. Yeah, take some advice from me who got her cracker to jam ratio perfectly. Hey, hope it still works with Rice May. For your elimination challenge, we'd like a rice dish that maybe could solve world peace. I don't know how you like how you want to prepare it is up to you. Sweet, savory, and if you're daring, a risotto. But you should know he'll

be cooking your rice dish for a hundred guests. It's something where palace. Pattington Bear will be your guest judge tonight. So please cook properly. And Luciana's like, can I have a rice cooker? properly. And Luciana's like, can I have a rice cooker? I've had it as like remember, feature the rice. We'll see you tomorrow. And Lauren is like, she had some super excited to taste your feed so good luck. Quiet, that was too nice. What you say is, you're stupid and you'll never do this right. Bye. It's like the opposite of smiling. You want to smile at them in a way that says you're stupid and then walk away. It's another driving and Buddha's like, oh, called some of them are real stressed, but

not me. Oh, I'm always sweet and gentle in mice and. And Lutje. We didn't say that. We didn't say that. Lutje said that. Lutje says that. But Buddha says, how do you make a rise to the star of the show? I know I'm going to make my rise in the shape of a star. And I'm going to make a rise, a virgin.

So it's like there's a show. And there's a star rise there. So Lutjeana is saying that she's been in London 19 years and I came here to learn English and I came for three months and 19 years later and I'm still here cooking. I want to serve a category which is a British Indian fusion type dish to show her appreciation for living in this amazing city. Yes, and then Victoria is going to make Maffé, which is like a Conguiz traditional Conguiz dish, and May knows that everyone's going to go to savory, so she's going to go, she's going to go

dessert, she's going to do like a Thai tarot pudding, and then Ali says he's going to make lamb wheezy, oozy, oozy with Basmati rice, which is famous in Jordan and his influence is his mother. Yeah, and he tells us that his influence in cooking is his mother, but the main chef in his region are all men. And he's like, and that's why in my restaurant, we offer many positions for women as chefs and front of the house. I was like, God, which is why his restaurant is upside down. Yeah.

It's an upside. So, uh, Gabri is making a mole and he also wants to do a risotto. And of course, he's Gabri. So he needs to move really fast and use 54 ingredients. And then he starts listing them. He's like, here's the ingredients I need. Bikki Opepper, Tomatio Opeki or pepper, tomato, pepper, chocolate, cinnamon, pepper, pepper, fish, pepper.

And he just starts listing all the things. Lili, everything in whole foods. And then Don, she's going to make a black rice congee. And she says she wants to do that because she knows it's going to hold up for several hours. And that hit a red flag for me, because I feel like when chefs think about, oh, this is gonna hold up,

I was like, it's gonna be like, not the right consistency. When they're not thinking about the flavor first and all that, when she's like, over thinking it, I just was like, I just feel like. Also when she says, it's like, hey, it's just over-cooked rice. So, it'll hold together.

Just using the term over-cooked rice, even though that's what it is. I'm like, oh, it's just over-cooked rice. So it'll hold together, you know? Just using the term over-cooked rice, even though that's what it is. I'm like, oh, you're already, you're coming from a place of... The link feels rough. Yeah, it does. And Dale makes this too. Dale makes a version of this too, and I was feeling the same thing with him. But it's also like, it's almost like she is... Yeah, she's all, she's like gaming the system a little bit, not gaming the system, but she's

thinking about strategy of how to be successful with the dish, not strategy against other people, but she's also upending a very classic traditional dish. That's maybe made that way for reason. It's the last year when that one guy decided he's going to grill potatoes and it's like maybe made that way for a reason. It's like the last year when that one guy decided he's gonna grill potatoes And it's like well, there's a reason why potatoes aren't grilled like it doesn't work, you know Well, she didn't plan on she didn't make that Adjustment yet right because right now she's just worried about getting the rice cooked all the way so that she I'm saying their stuff in I My understanding was that like congee's not normally made with black rice. And like, maybe there's a reason for that. But I couldn't buy this.

There may be a black rice congee out there. I don't know. Don't pin me to the congee cross, but you know, my rice is very simple. I'm Lebanese, so I'm used to like regular white rice and the boss modi rice. Like that's what we have.

And that's pretty, and then I have brown rice at all times because I put all my stuff in jars you know so when you open the cabinet and someone sees and like wow brown rice wow Ronnie look at you I really love that it's never been touched I think I think I made it one time so um next they're checking out and Gabri's like oh my god is oh my god in my last season I didn't have to do the shopping at all. And my cart still has half the ingredients and I already spent 350 pounds.

What do I do? Count your share, while you're shopping, that's what you do. You have you never been to a grocery store, you added up as you go. I know, and it's also that funny thing where people on top chef are always like, there was, it drives me nuts. It's like, you're on a food competition and they're like, oh, are always like, there was, it drives me nuts,

it's like, you're on a food competition, and they're like, oh, I'm gonna make something that normally takes five days and requires like 40 million ingredients, and I've decided I'm gonna do it, even though there's no way I can actually do this. Although somehow Gary pulls it off this episode, but then they have a cliffhanger, like, oh my God,

I'm like, I'm already like so over budget, and then it comes back, and it's like, hey, can I borrow some money? And me, it's like, cool, it's like, oh my God, I'm already like so over budget, and then it comes back and it's like, hey, can I borrow some money? And me, I was like, cool, it's like, oh, okay, cool. I'm surprised that you can do that. I know. Because the goal is that everybody has the same amount of money. It's not fair that one person gets another amount,

that they get more money than everybody else, even though it's someone else's used money or not unused money. I don't know, that seems fishy to me. I can check the rules on that. But they can share ingredients. So I guess it's almost the same difference. Well, that said, I love more less. So I'm glad that she learned him some money. Yeah. So I love me. By the way, she's like the best. And she could. I'm so happy to share because keeping that money is not going to help me to win.

I was like, I love you, man. I love you. I love you, girl. Sorry, I made fun of your shirt. So now back in the kitchen, Starbell is talking about how his first job at a big kitchen, he was on the rice station and he kept messing it up and getting screamed at. And that's how he learned to cook basmati blindfold. Yeah, I was like, okay, so he's going to mess up his rice today. But he doesn't actually, and then Dawn is saying, like, this is not like time is not on our side today. Like I have to have pressure cookers because black rice takes a long time to cook and I want to get it cooked all the way so I can make the congee tomorrow. And I was like, oh, this is the pressure cookers are always, that's a scary thing on top, Chef, too.

I'm just like, you know time is an issue for you. Why are you doing a, why are you trying to do something that you have to use the pressure cooker to make it work for a version of something that doesn't normally have black rice as far as I know, but I could be wrong. Well, the thing that sucks about pressure cookers the most, and I only use the like,

crockpot type, you know, what's that thing called the instable? That's the only kind I use. But the thing that sucks is you can't test it. You can't be like, oh, maybe that's enough time. You know, when they taste it, you have to completely depressurize it to taste it. Oh.

Yeah, exactly. That's when I'm like, oh, girl, why are you, why are you, why are you giving yourself such a little battle right now? You know like reinventing a congee and using a rice that's gonna take more time than you have. I don't know Yeah, so Tom comes in And well actually, no, I guess this is Tom the German the contestant Tom He's like every country in the world uses rice and there's not a single rice dish on the menu at Germany. I mean, come on, but my colleagues are Indian, so we do this for family members and it means something. That's what it means to me, something.

Yeah, it is Sri Lankan German dish now. So then Gabri is making his, make his mole and he's saying how it normally takes two days, you know, the usually whatever anyone makes Molei on the show they always have to remind us that normally takes two days and are doing it in five minutes. I then amars making R&C R&C and At one point his his risotto gets into Don's pot. I'm like She has very bad pot luck Really now working out for her on this. Was it Don's pot?

I couldn't tell who's pot it was. It was her pot. Yeah. Oh my God. So, um, oh, so now it's Tom, right? Okay. Yeah. So now Tom and Lauren come in and Tom is like, wow.

Hey, Shots. Hey, Sarah, how you doing? She's like, I'm making an everything bagel, Tom. That's how I'm doing, okay? And it's not going to be a bagel. It's going to be made with rice and bottled caps, okay? Because that's how we do it where I come from. Okay, so how do you present everything bagel made out of rice?

So you're going to do that. She's like, well, I'm going to do some sticky rice. And I'm going to put some, what I'm going to do is I'm going to put some plants on top of it because the rice isn't in season and we're gonna pour some Miller light on it and we're gonna put that on the plancher. See what happens. Press up some Cheetos and make magic. That's someone fucking do it.

Did you know they got TV shows outside of America? I just found out about this as wild. Wild TV is all over the world, Tom. This is not a fucking joke, all right? And Lauren's like, this is quite popular at the moment. And everything bagel, everything bagel rice. And Sarah goes, maybe I made it popular. That's right.

Lauren's like, hmm, thanks too, little lady. So then Dale's making his congee. So Dale's never made congee before. So I'm already nervous for him now because he's never done it and so Lorna gives him this look like And Tom's like, that's weird. I normally pod my sort of For us are brow a little bit more than laughs and sort of like this stupid person and then just sort of points and says look at them They're not gonna be here for long with a sort of weird to see your version of it, Lord. Dales like, don't worry. My cooks make this for a staff meal.

So I can figure it out. And Tom's like, uh, do you pay attention when they make, uh, pay attention when they make it? That was a good, Padma, Padma. And they'll say, yeah, well, I started out with good and Ramsey here. And yes, Dale, we fucking know with your and Ramsey here in let yes, Dale.

We fucking know with your bloody thumbs cracking crabs. Okay, we know. And he's like, and then we're opening two restaurants in Tokyo, Japan. And I had my son in Japan with me. I've essentially been a single father since he was five. So I was like, wait a minute. Who let somebody, who let him on here? He's there for his son.

Get rid of him. He's like, look, I realize I might want to go on top shop some days. So I said to my wife, let me raise our son in Japan. So I can do the single father thing. Otherwise, they're never going to let me on. It's time for commercial. It's time. Hi, I'm Michael Patrick King, host of the official Max Companion podcast. And just like that, the writers room. Each episode members of the writers room and I unpacked moments from season 2, sharing

juicy details you can only hear from us, stream and just like that season 2 starting June 22nd on Max, and listen to end just like that, the writers room on Max or wherever you get your podcasts. Angie has made it easier than ever to connect with skilled professionals to get all your home projects done well. Just bring them your project online, or with the Angie app and answer a few questions. With Angie, you can book instantly at an upfront price or requesting compare quotes from multiple pros so you can find the best price for your project.

So the next time you have a home project, just Angie that and start getting the most out of your home. Download the free Angie mobile app today or visit Angie.com. That's a N G I dot com. I'm for a crap and it's commercial. So Tom is like, I'm so, so, uh, did you get the message? We're making rice dishes, not potato dishes, because I see a lot of potatoes. And she's like, yes, I'm from Poland and I potato. Potatoes are just fat rice, that's all.

Oh, okay. So, what do you mean? We call potato gale rice. Wow, that's what it's mean when a problem does it, but okay, as you go, besides, I don't like these rice so my potato will highlight rice. He's like, okay, I don't know what that means but good luck and then my face. You like my son, you know, you like my son, just a very clear thing that you have to do in life and you decide to do something ridiculous instead. Good job, good job.

The gift that cementes my love for Sylvia forever. I'm Potato Girl. I knew when she said that, I was like, Ronnie just did a fist pump in the air. I was like, yes, between Sylvia's menu and maze outfit. So I'm like, you guys, I'm seeing. This is Top Chef Rondelstar. So next is Bagonia, and she's doing sweetened rice

and she's like, I love the flavor. I'm gonna do a fillet with lemon and risotto. And he goes, well, so lemon risotto then. Cheers. I hope. Wow, a new rice could be so exciting. Guess I'll see you later. Yeah, I think she was actually doing a seaweed rice.

That's why I'm not a sweetened rice, just for people who are like, oh, did I say sweeten because I wrote, I'm doing seaweed rice. Oh, I don't know what's wrong with me. Sorry, everybody. That's okay, we all make mistakes. Just really kill that one up. Listen, listen, sometimes what we say

and what we mean are two different things. Like when my son said, hey, dad, I want to follow your footsteps and then we mean are two different things like when my son said, hey, dad, I want to follow your footsteps and then we become a mixologist, you know? 30 minutes left, chefs. 30 minutes left to make your mini potatoes. So he leaves and then um, a mar is like, okay, anybody done with this water? I see water here on the stoves.

There's two pots of water. Anybody is anybody using this water? I see water here on the stove. There's two pots of water. Anybody is anybody using this water? And they show up a close up of every chef not answering. It's like, yeah. Everybody, do you hear me? Two pots of water here. Go on once. Going twice.

Two pots of water that are boiling on the stove possibly belong to, I don't know, Luciana, I don't know anyone, anyone. No, to be fair, why would anybody be boiling water on a stove if they're not going to use it? You know what I mean? But I don't know how else he could have gone about that, you know? So I don't know. Yeah, my judgment is I think I think he did a good job of the past from moment. I agree I had that same feeling, but I also felt like he did He did sort of call out and he did it a few times. So you know, that's that was on the jianna because

She's she's like has all these eggs and then she goes to stovetop and her boiling water is in there. I'm just like, who took my pants from here? Guys, guys, the pants with the hot water. Like, that's not right guys. Come on, who took my water? My guy. Yeah. I thought she was like, who took it?

And Gabri is like, oh, oh, a Brazilian fire. And she goes, who took my pants? So, who took my eggs? And she's like, who took my pants? took off my ass, that took hands out. And we get it done, done, done, commercial. And Dawn is like, well, when Luciana turned into beast mode, I realized she was talking about a marron, I'm moving pots.

I was like, oh, Dawn moved pots too? I was like, gosh. Wait, are you saying that when Luciana was saying, who moved my pots, you realize she was talking about the time you guys moved her pots? Oh my gosh, I'm sorry, I didn't know, I didn't know, I'm sorry, we did ask. And so Ligiana's like, that's unfair,

but you know what, forget about feelings and move on, there's no time. So then we go, everybody's kind of finishing up, right? So Sylvia's cooked her rice for tomorrow, and she'll add spices later. And Gabri finishes his mole but not the blending part, but she'll do later. And then Lutiana has to peel 100 eggs tomorrow, whatever. Now Dawn is not as lucky because her rice is crispy.

So she's like, okay, so tomorrow, I guess I'm going to have to focus all I can on making get a congee. I guess I'm gonna have to focus all I can on making it a congee. Yeah, so it's Not looking good. So then we're back in the next day there's some chitter chat at the hotel like begonia's Loves that she and may and Sylvia They all speak different languages, but they all understand each other and then they all understand each other, but they can't understand actual American English.

I thought that was funny. They're like, we are all from different countries and understand each other in English, but I don't know what the fuck the Americans are talking about. Like, what the hell? And they don't start laughing. And then God re-brings Luciana T and she's like, oh, remember yesterday when I was like,

really crazy, remember that? Ha-ha-ha. She was like laughing with like raging her eyes, remember yesterday when I was like really crazy. Remember that? She's like laughing with like raging her eyes like this tea better be hotter next time. I know. He's like, why do you think I'm bringing you tea? So then they're driving to the venue and I'm like, yeah, yesterday it was horrible, but I love the fine dining, you know, like using little tweezers and stuff. And Canada smiles like, I call tweezers, sissy tongs. Everyone like laughs and Mars like. So then they go to they go now they're arriving at the Alexandra palace. And they all have tents that they're going to be cooking in. They got one hour

to cook. So dawn's really stressed because of her right situation. So she puts it in the pressure cooker and hoping that it's going to get to where it needs to be. in, they've got one hour to cook. So Don's really stressed because of her right situation. So she puts it in the pressure cooker and hoping that it's going to get to where it needs to be. So we all know it's not going to, because it just won't. And Gabri just keeps saying, Molle, Molle, you know, this normally takes two days. And I've made it in five minutes. Wow.

But my grandmother would be jealous because I did this in two hours. You didn't do it in two hours hours or you're just blending right now. That doesn't count. That doesn't count, I feel like. Well, I think I made the stuff to blend yesterday. So I guess he's saying that was two hours. It did that was two hours.

Yeah, I'm in two days of blending. I will allow it as someone who's not a mole expert whatsoever. So then Ali is talking about, he's using charcoal in his rice to give it a really smoky flavor. And Mei is telling Buddha that she's making this dessert to dedicate to her mom and she's talking about how she came out at 13, which is really young to her mom and her mom at first.

You know, like, didn't understand, but like always accepted her and always loved her. And then, you know, now it's great between them. I thought it was cute. She said, like, I do, I would do my best to prove to her that being me is okay. And now she's happy. Yeah.

Well, I quite a, what a great way of looking at that, you know, like, I was accepted, so I just showed her. It's okay until she was happy, you know, I just shoved that woman so full of rice pudding. So she had no other choice but to smile. I think like when your daughter is just making delicious food for you every single day, you suddenly realize, you know what, I better accept her. Yeah, that's back to lean cuisine. As long as this gay can cook, she's fine, bye. I know. So, um, it's like, we have 10 minutes in Canada smile. It's like, stop pressuring me, bro. So then, uh, Sylvie is like, I'm going to use vanilla salt on top.

It's a risky, but I'm going to show rice can have different flavor. Then she shrugs like, yeah, she gives us like, look on her face like, I mean, anything can help because the rice is so stupid, it was stupid grain. Open the vanilla salt on it, anything. Don't love this idea for her. I already think it's like a little weird that she's doing this curry and then that she's going to put vanilla salt on it. Vanilla, vanilla is really hard to use and say red dishes.

Like I feel like vanilla and rose water are like, those are land mines, but especially vanilla because I'm still traumatized. But when I went to Stephanie Izzerd's restaurant, the girl on the go and I had some chicken that are like, those are landmines, but especially vanilla, because I'm still traumatized. But when I went to Stephanie Isher, it's a restaurant that girl on the go and I had some chicken that had like vanilla, like a vanilla sauce on it. And it was like literally one of those disgusting things

I've had in the past 10 years. No shade to Stephanie, but like that vanilla was not used properly. And I'm like, Well, I'm vanilla sauce. Stephanie Isher can't use it. And she's like great. Yeah, vanilla salt. I mean, how does that even work? Just salt that has vanilla flavor. I don't know.

I do have salt, and I do have vanilla. So I think I'm going to mix them and see what that's like. But I'm feeling it's not going to be great. So the guests arrive, and they start serving, and they're like, aren't from Sassatune Canada? Anybody know where that is? They're like, uh, gross. You know, all the customers.

All the British people like, we used to own thatatune, Canada? Anybody know where that is? They're like, uh, gross, you know, all the customers. All the British people like, we used to own that. No, Fatman Lorna come in and she's like, well, you got to see the chefs today with Tom. Good for you. I was so happy for you. I was so glad not to have to come check on the chefs today.

Bitch. And yeah, she's like, where they come, where they come, I'm sure they were a calm, I'm sure you're not star power had them not trembling. Rhyse messes up our best chefs and learners like wow America, huh? And girls like, oh my God, guys, the smells, the smells in here. Okay, train spotting, calm down. Okay. Get your face out the cotton candy.

Okay, we got a challenge to do here. I'm gonna tell you once today, Gail, breathe out of your mouth. Okay, I know I'm normally telling you the opposite, but just breathe out of your mouth, Gail. So now the, they're coming up in batches to present their food. So first, we have Luciana and, or Luciana. And she's made the kejury with the courier's mottatic.

Did you cook the rice here? Did you actually touch this rice? Because it's terrible. It's absolutely terrible. That's how you do it, Lorna. Was this rice cooked here in a palace? It was a cooked in a gross kitchen with a clock decoration. See what I did there, Lorna?

Tractor. And Sir, he's like, all right, I did everything rice with salmon and cucumber and cream cheese because it's like an everything bangle. Got it? And Nicole did, Nicole's like, um, one of my favorite rolls is crispy for a caque rice with the negatoros. So enjoy everybody. So Sarah, how do you actually eat this rice?

And Sarah's like, well, you can use like, you can use it like a little cracker and like just to hand it. Oh, like a cracker. We get it, Ritz. Ritz, you didn't win the challenge. You can't pick up the corporations too late. So they like Sarah's. Lorna says there's interesting flavors.

And Lorna's like, oh, absolutely. They love it. What a banga. Yeah, I love when a chef has an idea that turns the whole thing on a Ted, like, I love that on, unlike my son who still make unscrew drivers at some bar in Brooklyn. I'm going to call that revolutionary, would I? What was that? Female empowerment, female empowerment, M&Ms, idea? Because it was turned right under 10.

Right on 10. This everything bagels like everything for women. Nicole's dish is tasty and very Sarah common I meant. You know, I know I'm right supposed to be the star, but some of the things there's too much race in this dish. Oh God. It's like Gail. Gail after she goes to an all you can eat rice buffet, am I right? Just too much rice in her.

And Lorna's like, I agree with Tom. But no, I agree with Tom. Lorna, well, I do, so well. Now I agree with Tom. Lorna, somebody take the, somebody take the gel matter away from Lorna. Lorna's like, I just feel like the ratio is all ratio. Oh, wait a listen in on my discussions with the guy from the quick fire challenge when I said ratio. Unfortunately for you, I T. M. ratio. Try again. So they talk about Luciana's dish and Tom's like, we know we got our first over cook, Christish. And Lauren is like, but you know, the voice is like overcooked, but

it's also still hard. That's what I used to say about salmon. But she did do a great job of smoking the fish. And the egg was a beautiful. Oh God, don't get gale talking about eggs. It's close, you'll ever get to seeing a female erection. So, uh, Silvia is telling customers, I'm proud of where I'm from, enjoy potato. Yeah. So, Pagonia, Sylvia and Victoria are present and Pagonia has a lemon rice with pickle ginger and beetroot and seaweed and Sylvia has coconut rice with her vanilla salted, mottomon curry and Victoria has basmati rice with her sosmife and shrimp. I like the pat and I keep asking the chef. She's like, so it's just basmati rice thought so.

So is this black Rice thought so. So is this black rice thought so? Do you know what rice is? Spell rice. Look at me guessing all the rice while Lorna just sits there staring at Tom like she has a chance. Lorna, you know this is rice, right? Not far, oh.

Lorna, stop trying to roll the rice. It's not dice. It's rice. You know, Peconia's... Her flavors are just like really out there, but it works. You know, rice is the star. Yeah. Damias was stunning. Of course, everything she does is like... It was fucking stunning. She was pink like she died the rice with the vegetable that she was using. I mean, just gorgeous. It was so pretty. Gaye wants the multiply out and change into all sorts of different colors

and put it on her blouse. She just loves the pattern. You know, Gaye, she loves the pickled ginger beetroot pattern. So they talk about Vagonya Yap. And Gail's like a strange but really alluring pop of horse radish. Mm. Did anyone want to take that one? Anyone? I feel like it's really obvious.

No, okay. I'm just glad Gail ate her vegetables today. Tom, well, so he's just great, but the rice, you know what? The rice is not a star. I was expecting a little just just great, but the rice, you know what, just the rice is not a star. I was expecting a little more shall we dance from the rice? What's that song called? I hope we dance. What's that song for my streak? Oh, I hope you dance by the ad woe, Matt. Yeah, I was hoping for a little more. I hope you dance from this price, but it's not a star. Not a star.

I hope Gail gets a fashion sense. That's my favorite song. There's a sharp corner of sweetness to this dish. Okay. Sure. Gail gets so intense. I love Gail. I know. I love Gail. So Gail is like, you know, I thought that Victoria was very successful, but like it shouldn't have been in a bowl. Did you just did you say it shouldn't have been in a bowl, right?

No, Lorna did. She's like putting it in a bowl and Padma goes, it breaks the rice. Yes, that's what I was about to say Lorna. Yeah, I hate bowls too. In fact, I kind of invented hitting bowls. So in a way, like Lorna was Yeah, I hate bulls too. In fact, I can't have been venting hitting bulls. So in a way like Lorna was copying me Did you say something swim fan? I mean Lorna I bet Lorna likes putting things more in bulls more than she admits So um let's see So Buddha serves a chicken rice. A Chinese, a Chinese, a Chinese, a Chinese preparation. And he's like, it's a dish that my dad would teach me.

It's like, okay, Buddha, that was last season. You can't keep pulling that heart string. Oh, he was Buddha with his dad song and dance, everybody. And Gabri made a green risotto with mole negro. And then Dale serves his congee with short rib, pickled short rib and pickled mushrooms. And so Tom's like, wow, so this is your first congee ever, huh? Well, good luck. Good luck with that one, buddy. Wow, it's like we're having a congee. Go visit. That was from Alie Wong. I asked her to send me one this morning.

It's a dear friend. I love the cookery on Buddhist dish. Yes. I would ever learn as about to say I said it first. It really is a hog in a bowl. I've shut up slut. Sometimes things just have to be put into a bowl, okay? I mean, I hate them. They're awful. Let's stop the God, poor gale. If you ever seen a picture of gales as a child, that was her haircut.

Please don't bring up bowls to Gale. So, Capri's risotto. I love the flavors in it. Yeah, you know, I really think the consistency is perfect and Lorna goes, you know what, it really is a hug in a bowl. See, what a hypocrite. Now, all of a sudden, she loves bowls. She loves hugs in the bowls.

I can't with this woman. Mm-hmm. So let's talk about Dale's dish. What a stupid mustache, am I right? And Lorna's like, actually, it's a great balance. She goes, well, I would have liked more congee personally, but I, to fabric his dish, I loved it. Well, actually, our deed is well shut up.

Nobody asks you stupid face. You don't even taste it. Maybe no one rises. You don't even have a prepared joke from Ali Wong about congee. Well, the idea of Padma just being so flummic, she can't even come up with anything true we mean to say.

She's so threatened by Lorena. truly mean to say. She's so threatened by Lorena. Did you mean to serve this with a spoon? God damn it. So now they're talking about make as she made dessert. And then Tom did Sri Lankan something with the goji berry salad. And it's very nice. It's very nice. Yeah, meh serves her dessert, her salted coconut milk and sweet potato pudding. And she had like a Lebanese spice rice with mint and cucumber yogurt. Yeah, it's so crazy seeing that being served in a fancy way, you know, because I'm used to that kind of food.

Wow. in a fancy way, you know, because I'm used to that kind of feeling. Like, wow, cucumber and rice and yogurt. What a stunning revelation. It's like when Gail puts on a heel. It's like, wow, you can't dress up. And I love seeing a lovinies cook on here. I love that. I feel great. I've never really felt that.

You know, like when you see, like gay people, I've never been like, oh my god, that is so me, I feel so see. I mean, I love seeing gays and everything. But when I see the food, I guess that's what I identify with the most of my life is food. So when I see food that I actually make and eat, I'm like, yeah, it's char bell, yeah, so. Oh, that's wonderful.

I am actually genuinely happy that you have that experience. Well, thanks. I've got to can't wait. Wait to see his version of Peter bread. Am I right, everybody? Well, looks like we got a bunch of chicken and rice dishes. You know, it's pretty good. I think that Tom did a good job. Of course, I'm not talking about me. Although I did do a good job raising my son, but apparently not good enough because he's only a mixologist, not an actual chef. I mean, not like I hadn't working with me in the kitchen for 20 years of his life. Side by side, did you have everything I knew so it could be passed on for generation to generation. So I guess you could say, I failed as much as a father as Tom the German did as well as a chef. Well, I'll say this much about Tom's work.

There was a lot of precision to his work. Wow, he had about as much precision as you have sloppy forkage in your work. Well said, Gail. Now two of these chicken and rice is out of them both. I like sharp bells the best. I do love the nuts. Oh, Gail, all right, this isn't your wedding vow time. Right? You know, I thought these dish was fantastic. It was absolutely beautiful. Oh really, but it was served in a bowl. Wait, where do we stand on bowls? I can't tell because first we didn't like bowls, but now as things were served like, like a hug in a bowl. Where do we stand? What do you like, fellas? Or do I hate bulls. Everything served in a bowl loses, so I say. This pudding should have been served on a plate

like a normal person, not a monster. That's what we're gonna call her, monster may. Hey, mother may I be a monster? Wait a second, but I do have to admit, made it rice two ways, and Tom goes, well, it was about the rice, finally, now coming into the theater near you, it's a film starring rice because it's the center of the film, well done, well done, me. Hey Lorna, what have you done two ways? Uh, really actually I can

do a lot of different things two ways ways. Oh yeah, slut and slut. Steve it. Someone fire here. I'll do it. You're fired, Nourna. You can't see that. I'm actually beloved in my country and I'm already one of the American audiences. Quiet. So Ali, Amar and Don are up and Ali is, uh, does his lamb oozy. And Amarster's apomacranit beef stew with a saffron ranching. And Don does, okay. And Don does a black venus congee with braised ox tail.

The reason why I mentioned on the side is because last week, it was supposed to be vegetables with a star with just a touch of protein. And he put a big-ass scallop in the middle and the vegetables on the side. And this week, it's supposed to be make rice the star with just a touch of protein and he put a big ass scallop in the middle and the vegetables on the side. And this week it's supposed to be make rice the star. I does this whole beef stew with like a ball on literally hanging off

the side of the. That's true. Yeah. Sorry. I had to really, I really had to speak my, my anti side agenda. I don't know, but I see a big fried rice ball like that. And I cannot imagine having the ball to complain because that looked amazing.

Well, I, but also like, the ball looked great. So why did you make a whole stew with it? Why don't you have the ball right in the center and be like, make the ball the star? Like the ball was not the star. That ball could be a star. Probably because if you put it in the center of the stew, it would be a soggy by the time the guy said, I was saying, don't make the stew. You put a big ball with a lovely garnish and you're good to go.

Yeah. So then, Don, okay, we already said that. So what did you think of the Mars? You know what I think? If you said his name backwards, it would be Sramma. Anybody? Hey, Lona, why don't you give your opinion about Lamar's first. Lorna, say it.

I love the, I love the, the, it's two, I said the first. No, I didn't think. I, I think, didn't think. He highlighted the rights. I like the right, oh, Lorna. Lorna is a better host than partner. He's a better person than pop. Listen, then,

Hey, got you bitch. Well, I love the problem, but the meat is tough. What about Ali? I mean, Gayle, you'd write through it,

but she basically has razor blades in her mouth. So Lona loves Ali's smokiness because he is literally a piece of charcoal in there. And I was like, wow, really smokey. And Gale's like, it hit me.

Oh no, Gale, what did you say to it? It's like the first time she tried to brush her teeth with a Charleston chew, it just really hit her hard. So it's like the time I hit the female Eminem step stepping the top cap and the top cabinet and kale tried to get it and knock down the mixer. Hey, guys, I had something to say. If Don didn't tell me this was a congee, I wouldn't have known. How'd it have been like, I really enjoy this non-congee-right

dish. How embarrassing. Congee rice dish. How embarrassing. So let's see Padma Gail is like it's crispy rice and breath. I don't know. Padma loved the ox tail on dogs but Gail didn't like that the rice was crispy. Gail, as someone else who has a tail here at this table, what did you think about the ox tail? Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh,onia was amazing. Yeah, and I love that rice pudding. I love that. I mean, who to thought that there are still our children that want to impress their parents out there? Wow, me.

Restore on my face. And Ali, he knocked it out of the park. Did me shut up. Well, tells Congee was pretty good. Really was. Really good, Congee. Really good. I want to say Congee was pretty good. Really was, really good Congee. Really good. I wanna say Congee a few times before I get on what your puns has faced about it.

Just a minute, Congee, Congee, Congee. Well, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, let me do one more. Comjee, Dale, yes, go. Wow, Tom, if you like, con, do so much, why don't you just make some into a fedora and put it onto your head already. Ha, ha, ha, ha. So now we're in the stew room and they're all chatting and Pradma comes in

with her scary face. I love when Pat might use a scary face. She's like, yeah. We'd like to see. Gabri Dawn, Luciana Ali, Sombre May and Silvia and a haircut for Gail. Thank you. Now I'm gonna walk into the judging room

and please stay 25 feet behind me. Thank you so much. COVID rules still apply, okay? It's called COVID rules. May, Ali and Gabri, you three are the plaintiff people in this room. How do you feel? You three are the most in need of decorating like a Christmas tree. But you did have our favorite dishes of the day. How does it feel? And Gabri is like redemption. My dish was inspired by my mother's dish and my grandmother's dish, but they took two days. I beat those skinks with a two hour cook. Now, how much water do

you normally spill into your grandmother's mole? How many times have you tried to sabotage your grandmother's mole? Hey, you know, I love the mashing up of the two cuisines. That was a really great, great technique that you showed there. And Lauren was like, it was a beautiful play to feed. And all that I would eat. Any single beautiful. Any day. I would have an any day. Any day. Delicious. I could imagine anything more wonderful. More wonderful.. I would have any day. Any day, delicious. I couldn't imagine anything more wonderful than I would eat a bowl of it without any regards.

Without any regards, wait a minute, we hate bowls. Oh. Ali, how did the take-off for you? Now Ali is like, he says he was challenged by cooking outside because normally it's cooked underground. Oh my God. So you've met all the Sarah's relatives?

She's from Kentucky. It's not even a country. Oh. Poor Sarah. I know. I got love all these people and we are so mean to them. I literally love them all so much. I got love Padma. I love Gail. I love Tom. I love Sarah and we're just we're just terrible people. Yeah, it's fine. So Gail's like the thing that hit me. Oh, my God, Gail. Another victim story from Gail. What was it? My shoe. Was it my shoe?

Cause I did throw it out. You in case you missed. I think you thought it was a snack. She caught it with her mouth. It's very impressive. So they loved me. It's obviously right. And Tom's like, you know, you gave us a rice dish, but that could be boring, but this was exciting. And me's like, yeah,, you gave us a rice dish, but that could be boring, but this was exciting. And May's like, yeah, but, you know, even though I have immunity, I'd like to do my best. And Tom's like, well, I felt the sweet potato was, you know, it was a, it was a boil

because it created another texture. It was another mushy thing, on top of another mushy thing, but it was a different mushy. Lots of, lots of good mushy things, rubbing around. Was it bathing season and gales black? Oh, you know, and I thought the crispy rice cracker

was spectacular. Oh yeah, really original. She made a cracker on cracker challenge day. Wow. Let's see how many words did your cracker fix? No, and Lauren is like, and the fact that this was inspired by your mom and your grandmother makes it even more special.

Oh, wow, wow, wow, Lauren, huh? So May starts telling about how, like, growing up, like, for their mom cooking, like, her mom would make dessert and sell at the market to take care of the family and May just starts crying and Pam is like, oh, is this make you say, do you want to cry? We found our cry, baby, the season everyone. It's May. Mother May I cry.

Wow, you really honored the women of your family, May. Now please get some scissors and honor Gail's head by giving her layers. All right, everybody. They can only be one winner. And also apparently one cryer that's me In the the shift today that really understood the brief the winner for this challenge is Ali And everyone's like oh and he's so happy he won obviously and he's like sorry mom, but today I cook better. Who's he then you? Whoa when obviously and he's like, sorry, mom, but today I cook better. Who's he then you? Whoa.

Okay, I'm sure Dan with mom. And the loser, of course, our balls. Okay. That means that Sylvia, Don and Luciana, unfortunately, the three of you served your food in bulls today. I'm terribly sorry. Bulls are out. today. I'm terribly sorry, bulls are out. So, Tom's like, all right, well, all the dishes were good today, but this was a

rice challenge. I want to see a rice in a top hat with the cane, doing a little tat dance on the bottom of the TV screen because the rice needs to be the star. Okay. Yeah, I need the rice to be receiving an award for best picture. It's the star. Every rice, everywhere, all at once, okay? So, Louisiana, they talk about Louisiana's dish first and Lauren was like, the fish was cooked perfectly and the eggs were cooked perfectly, but the rice just didn't have any flavor in times like, yeah, I mean, your race was

overcooked and undercooked at the same time. And someone's like, who's cooked too quickly, is almost like, you made a rash decision to be like, Hey, how about IBM exologist? That's going to work out for me for the the Fatma evil, evil question. And don't say, well, I parked the rice and then I reduced the soup into porridge. And Tom's like, ah, was soup. She goes, well, black rice releases such beautiful stars. And I thought that would be enough to feel like a congee. And I was like um, it ate

crunchy so I was not really getting that creaminess I want from a bowl of congee. It was like a bowl of gale's hair crunchy and disappointing because it was in a bowl which are out. And Silvia is like well I was happy my dish, but I'm from Poland and we are all potatoes. Yeah. You should see a picture of Gail's family. They're our potatoes, too. Silvia, by the way, for the record, Silvia was on the receiving end

of a classic Pat McQuestion formation. Silvia, did you feel good about the way your dish came out? She also gets her here because Silvia goes, rest is not my favorite thing. And fattening goes, I can appreciate that. How did you cook it? I appreciate that. Just kidding. I can't at all. You stupid bitch. So it's like, I finished in coconut rice and vanilla salt. And like oh my god vanilla salt.

Vanilla salt, oh my god. I mean I've heard of barucas salt but not vanilla salt. Well who's probably a sweetest maize dessert there? Well, and Gail's like I a sweetness in the soup. Yeah, girl, it was made with fucking coconut milk and vanilla. Okay, vanilla salt vanilla salt. It's like the Lorna of salt. No offense, Lorna. Well, that stew was incredible, but unfortunately, it wasn't about stew today.

Just like it snort about bitch. So that bitch isn't going to get to me. Wow. Wow, that's pretty bold of you. That almost sounded like bold, but it's bold difference. Actually, I did say bold. Thank you very much. I would appreciate the credit for saying that's very bold of you. Oh, I see what you're saying. I see what I see with other media there. I see what I see with other media there. So, Pat, I was like, we have a lot to discuss.

Unfortunately, it's not with poor people. Please go back to the other room. So Luciana's like, wow, for me to go home with rice, I don't think I could enter Brazil anymore. Oh, is Brazil what we're calling the so-how's now? Because you were never allowed. So, is Brazil what we're calling the so-house now, because you were never allowed. So Tom's like, ah, Luciano sucks. Okay, there's no there there.

I just don't like it. They're not into it. And Padma says, Sylvia gave us a dessert rise. That vanilla was weird. And it was in a bowl. And Tom's like, yeah, I'm in your hot sweet. But all sweet. But all.

And Gale's like, I mean, it felt unbalanced to me. Yeah. Gale, like the time he tried to walk on a plank after eating 12 cantaloups. Totally unbalanced. It's like me and Gale on a seesaw. So... again, after 12 candidates. I'm not sure, Luciana or Don, God, but we were saying with this challenge. Rise, rise. Don't forget, but we all know that Don's a competitor. And Gail says, well, regardless of what we know she can't do This was not it today Tom. This just wasn't it. But I was like, I think we have our answer. Play it totally and tell no one believes. Well, okay chefs, well for some many chefs on top chef, Rice has been the downfall. So it was tricky, it's always difficult. And in the case of all three chefs, the problem was

a nice use of the rice. And unfortunately, one of you rice is going to be again a downfall. Yeah, and you know, in many wars, in many wars, rice is the downfall. There was Iraq where we had to fish the dawn out of a hole he made in the mound of rice, or Vietnam where we surrendered our rice or World War I where rice first used tanks, I think. So fortunately for you, uh, rice is again going to be down for Pobba. As we all remember, Richard Nixon was exposed by, uh, by rice calling it at the Watergate

Hotel and the old member of course, uh, uh, President Clinton, uh, if it weren't for the rice stain on that dress, he never would have known about what happened with my clothes. You know, the most famous quote from Mr. Ronald Reagan, President Ronald Reagan, sir, tear down this rice. So, unfortunately, all those years, the people of Germany never realized that wall was being a rice. But at first, there was just rice, a Gorbachev. So rice was too hard to get through because that wall was cooked by Don. Don, please hack your knives and go, I'm sorry.

I'm so sorry. Don, we know you're a great competitor who can't make rice. So see you in my prescription. So they comfort Don and she's upset of course because she wasn't expecting to go home this early, you know, but it was great to be included in the season and stuff and she made a mistake. So what are you gonna do, you know? I love this is sad because everyone on here is really talented

and they're all really cool. Like no one seems like an asshole. Although we did have a couple people last week who were like, I can't believe you guys are calling Buddha a non-smob. Cause we're like, yeah, Buddha's not a snobby. And Buddha is fully, Buddha is fully like, I love London food. I first had my first quince here and I've made it into a

twill with a bit of cow leather that's been made. Well he's I mean I know I still don't think he's like a snob he may just have I think he's just like he's like high-falutin but I don't know I feel like he seems really nice. Well yeah I said I said, I don't, I said we meant it in the way that like, I don't think he's snottied to other people. He seems like a nice person, but yeah. I just thought it was funny hearing that back because of course, Buddha's totally a snob, you know? But a food snob and this is time, chef.

So God love it. I'm sure, I'm sure a villain that's gonna come out, a villain will emerge, just for right now, they're all just making amazing food that's making me so hungry. And yeah, I feel like we're in peak pad, Mattam and Gail right now. By the way, love Lorna too. I'm surprised we haven't seen more of her,

and I hope we see, I hope we continue to see more of Lorna. What a charmer, my God, what a natural host. Yeah, why don't we need more? I demand more Lorna. I want more Lorna. Yeah. She's charming and lovely. Well, everybody, thank you so much for being with us. This was a really fun week for us.

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