We Hate Movies - MELR0210 #30 - Melrose Place "House of God"

Episode Date: July 10, 2020

On this week's MELR0210, the gang is chatting about the Melrose Place episode, "House of God"! Originally airing November 11th, 1992, this game-changing episode features the debut of Daphne Zuniga as mysterious New York photographer Jo Reynolds, Allison kicking a dryer, Billy watching Allison sleep, Rhonda moving her entire apartment in a morning, Jake having shower trouble, and Michael and Jane poorly handling a domestic violence situation. WHM is donating 100% of our 2020 merch income to causes fighting for racial justice. For more information on how you can pitch in, head over to our website. MELR0210 is a new show we put together to help you pass the time during this more-than-necessary social distancing period. New episodes will air Thursdays, right here on the main feed for another few weeks! So stay home, tune in, and yearn for the more innocent and sexy time of the 1990s! Unlock Exclusive Content!: http://www.patreon.com/wehatemovies See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This is a headgum podcast. Hello, and welcome to Melrode 210A, we hate movies, quarantine side of show wherein we talk about Melrose Place one week and Breville's

9-2-0 the other week so I changed to the language around there a little bit. Nice, dude, nice.

Yeah, just seamless. That was awesome. I don't even know what I'm listening to now with that change. This is the week

we talk about Melrose Place and it's a monumental episode. A first appearance. This would have a little I believe it would be a

green highlight on a wizard magazine to let you know this is the character's first appearance. If I'm not mistaken, it would be something like that. Did a wizard profile, Daphne's in I at any point? To my knowledge.

No, you know what, dude? If she was in fucking space balls, there's an outside chance she was profiled in Wizard magazine. She might not have been profiled in Wizard magazine, but she would definitely be like fan cast as a lot of things. They wouldn't even identify her by name. It'd just be like Princess Vest, but

joining Malrose plays. In 1991 X-Men, she's Gene Gray. Yeah, yeah. Exactly. I am joined. These hilarious ghosts you're hearing are that I have not yet introduced. My name is Stephen Sadek, by the way, the first hilarious ghost. I am joined by other hilarious ghosts, Chris Cabin. Oh, hi, hoi, ho. Eric Siska. Howdy, partner. I died in the old West. And Andrew Juven. Yo! We are talking about Melrose Place, episode 15, House of God, which I actually don't know.

what the relevance of the title is. Spoiler alert. No one is going to church. I think I got it. I think I know what it is. It's because we have a new cast member visiting the nether plane of Melrose place. Got it. And that is the house of God. Like, because it's an other world dimension where demons and gods run amok. I see. Isn't it at the house of the devil then? Because I mean, Melrose running around here. Got Melchai thrown in the pool. Well, here's the twist, dude. Devil is God. Oh shit, dude, sick, dude. Oh, wow.

You know what it might be, though, honestly? Is, like, a lot of this episode is Joe, like, already trying to figure out whether or not she's going to fuck Jake. And so she's like, maybe I'll go down and pay a visit to the House of God. The Riverboat Strangler's Arms. House of God where Jake's body was jizzled. They don't talk about, they don't have the scene as a deleted scene wherein the rest of the cast, the rest of the denizens of Melrose Place,

Mel Rose Place has to do the blood ritual to allow Joe to enter the apartment complex, you know. That's right, yeah. You know, it's a crazy thing where, like, you know, you have to have some of the prior tenants' blood. So, like, Rhonda had to send away to get a little sample from Sandy. Oh, hey, y'all. Totally forgot to leave some blood behind. Thank you for releasing me from my blood contract. Let me go to New York, y'all. Now I can be nominated for a daytime Emmy, y'all. Oh, but I'm up to my neck in basket cases. I sent you a check, y'all, so you can buy a new caldron.

Thanks, y'all. That's a good call, Steve. I think the untold story of Sandy is that she runs into fucking Dwayne from basket case. So we start with, like, racing game music is the only way I can say. Well, actually, we start, I'm sorry, with a theme song because we are cutting in a brand new character, Daphne Zaniga, who we've already mentioned, is playing Joe. This is kind of crazy. Like, wait until the episode after she's introduced before you put her in the intro for me.

It was very jarring. It is jarring. It's also like, let's refilm some of this stuff. How about that? Like, the thing is, it's very clearly, like, they just had Daphne's Zaniga come in for a day, and she's going to, like, play pool by herself. She's going to do her one shots of her smiling at the camera for her name title. and they cut her in sort of to like the walk at the end.

I feel like. Like a jib jab. It is kind of like a jib jab. It's like it's just, it's so lazy. Like here you are. You're celebrating like a new character. Maybe it's a thing. Unlike my 90210, 30, 30, 35 minute YouTube video where I watched all of the variations of the theme song.

I haven't done it for Melrose Place, but maybe it's a thing where they were like, look, we'll do a big. revamped one for season two because also by that point like Ronda's out of there you will have Amanda Woodward in at this point who knows? It's like hey guys we're doing all right on Wednesday

we're going to do to Joe and Alice and Sheen by the way everybody come by the studio a lot to do to walk it'll take 20 minutes tops just come to do the walk we rented out the Johnny Rockets again to come in

Yeah, Mancini's eating some fries as usual. Now Joe's here, though. She's also having a milkshake. Daphne, I'm sorry, all the cash members. Well, I guess they're just hung over. We're going to go to the same parking lot that they did their little strut in. And we're just going to cut you in, okay, honey? Thank you.

And though, yeah, it'll be totally shameless. Much like Billy's book. Andrew, thank you so much for doing a book last week. We needed something. Oh, anything I can do to help the show. you know it's such a treat to just be here filming stuff oh jesus christ you actually talk like that holy shit oh my god get me out of here right now um uh it is but then we start with this like weird racing game music where billy and allison are running this has to be sorry but this has to be fake

music oh it has to oh of course yeah i thought i was playing fucking cruising u s a I really want to know what was originally there. I'll pull up the soundtrack listing on IMDB. That's always incomplete, but we'll see what we got. I believe it was Terrifier by Pig Destroyer. It was not. Kevin, I bet you a thousand dollars. It was not that song.

I'll take those odds. Yeah, I can't find it. But anyways, so Billy is making Allison do a bunch of shit. this is kind of like not even a C plot it's like an X plot because it kind of goes nowhere and ends in the middle wherein Billy is making Allison do a bunch of shit to get over Keith

Yeah he's read some magazine article That's like the 12 steps to get over your X or something like that And he's like come on it's step two Allison we got to jog out here in the 100 degree heat till you pass out in the road She's like you're being really annoying No I'm not what are you talking about being annoying What are you talking about? See that right there?

Billy, that right there? That's exactly what I'm talking. Yeah, yeah, that again. She's got a great line of what's more exhausting, jogging or listening to Billy. Yeah, I can tell you what it is. Well, that's the thing, right? It should be like, all right, Allison, I know how much you hate my guts. So I'm going to give you a 12-paced head start, and then I'm going to start chathen you. And you'll be forgetting about Keith when you're running for your life. We've got to do some cardio for the big ceremony. want to be prepared for the blood right tonight. If I catch you, if I catch you, Allison, you have to listen to my pitch. Oh, God, yeah. Oh, it's, I actually found it in my notes. It's 12 steps to beating the blues. Actually, all right, Allison,

you're just moping around the house all the time. I got a way to get you out of the house. If you stay in the house, I will be loudly reading Don Quixote. Prolog, leisurely read her. You don't need me to swear that I for this book, born out of my own brain?

You got a copy of that sitting right there? I just happened to have a copy of that. Oh, and caution, Allison, I mispronounce a lot of shit. So get ready. That's a pava. Windmile. What was that again?

Takapama. I like that a lot. That's important. uh in these trying times um so she's like really annoyed by him and that's kind of her thing we cut back to michael and jane jane uh welcome back to the show michael and jane it's been a couple weeks since your miscarriage and um she is being really pestered by him to join some uh planning committee for some big uh intern mixer that is going to be happening at a couple of days and she's like Michael, I really don't want to do this.

I've got my own shit going on. I'm like, come up, babe. It's a do, boo. Yo, babe, come on. You always say you want to be part of the hospital family. Well, here you go. And Michael, why are you wearing the shirt of Africa to work today? Oh, yeah.

What is that about? It's a shirt that is just the continent of Africa, like from an old school map. It's kind of cool looking, but I would feel a little self-conscious as a white guy walking around with it. Yeah, it's a map of the triangle trade, babe. Gold. She even says, like, why are you wearing this? And he's like, oh, I'm going out with this guy, Scott. He's a pediatrician on the floor. He's great. He's going to tick me out on his boat and I figure, I don't know, this is my most boat friendly outfit. I don't understand what self-conscious means, Jane. I hope it's a good boat because someday maybe I can borrow it

from him and kill you with him. Good Jake to help. On their way out, they run into Daphneesaniga as Joe, walking into Melrose Place, a real... I do love how much this episode is an introductory episode for her, because so many times, like, wow, Joe, you're really interesting. Why, thank you. I am really interesting. When Joe's not on screen, everyone needs to be asking, where's Joe? It's also a good way of showing you, like, how nobody should live here. Yes. Like, you have all of these people button in on your shit all the time and telling you what's... to do all the time and you just want to live your life fuck this shit it does seem like and i forget

because i watched i've only seen like this season and a half uh like five years ago so i don't remember jo's got something going on which we'll learn about but it's like she's under pressure to move out kind of quickly and quietly it seems yes she does uh harbor a little bit of a secret uh that is revealed within this first season oh i know she had an arranged marriage to a guy named prince valium That's right. It was then cracked up by a Lone Star, I believe, Eric. Is that the guy's name? No, no, it's Billy, because I'm a certified prince.

By the way, she's from New York, and it's like this faustian bargain between New York and Los Angeles. Whenever, like, Sandy leaves, and then they have to send something in response. That makes sense. And I like that she's with... You must send us a soul back if you are to take one from us. And she's wearing all black, I think, to really drive home the, whoa, she's not from a... around here. Yeah.

Dark and edgy. And there's also this thing where she's like quote unquote rude. But I think to Chris's point like, she's just walking in and it's like, hey, you guys got in the apartments. And Rhonda pops out of nowhere. It's like, well, I need a roommate.

And she's like, nah. It's like, well, how about we switch? And it's like, that's fine. But like, what's the rent? How many, you know what I mean? Like what's what? What's the utility is kind of a situation? Yeah, a lot of questions here are not being asked.

And then like, before you know it, she's like, okay, Ron. we'll get your shit out of here by this afternoon because I'm moving into this fucking apartment and I was like, whoa, there's way, like Jane says, because Michael's like, oh, I got to go to work, but my wife will show you the apartment.

And like, is that how he said it? I think that it was exactly like that. It was a clip. We edited it in a clip. Oh, how good. That's work. Officially licensed from spelling entertainment. No, but he's like, you know, Jane can show you around or whatever. And Jane specifically is like,

okay, so we need you to fill out an application and blah, blah, blah, and she's just like, got it, perfect. Rhonda, get the fuck out. I was like, no, you haven't been accepting yet. She just walks out and is like, I will see what, you know, it's like, four o'clock I'm going to be back here. This place better be vacant.

It's really something. I mean, it's so weird, and she also needs a two bedroom because she has a dark room because she's a photographer. That's kind of her thing. And she's like, oh, you know, we got a lot of creative types around here in Melrose place. Like, I don't give a fuck. Like, you know what I mean?

I don't need to know about who's, who's, fucking who it's none of my business i just want a place to sleep you're a photographer or creative type yeah we got a lot of unemployed people here at melrose yeah that's definitely how it should have been conveyed you're absolutely right uh we see michael on his boat it's kind of a useless it's just him and this dude scott kind of introducing you introducing you to the concept of this guy who seems like a really nice guy uh uh and yeah i mean and the whole thing here is like it's this interns mixer where the new hospital interns, you know, are going to meet, like, doctors that are working at the hospital. And the whole idea is, like, if you can get in and,

like, meet some, you know, doctors, shake some hands, that kind of a thing. Like, it'll put you in a better position for when you're, like, leaving your internship and looking to be, you know, a full-on doctor at the hospital. So Michael's whole thing is, like, I got to be great to this guy, Scott, because he holds my future in his hands. Oh, you're missing the complete. get the end of that that he says very loudly. He's and then we cut to Jane and this woman, I forgot

her name already. Liz. Liz. And they're kind of hitting it off. By the way, these are the McBain's. Can I just point that out? The McBain couple. Love it. Mancini. So Liz and

Jane become fast friends. just hitting it off about being doctor's wives. And then, like, Michael and Scott show up. And it's like, well, we're going to dinner. No, no two ways about it, Buster Browns. And, like, they're all like, okay, that'll be fun. They go out to dinner and this woman has a black eye now. And it's like, oh, no.

Dude, and she's, like, telling this ridiculous story about, like, getting hit in the face with, like, a burst pipe or some shit. And, like, oh, man. And, like, Scott is, like, make it sexy. She's like, well, I was naked at the, time it's just weird like it is one it's your classic like you know and not classic in a funny way but like a story that a somebody who's uh being abused makes up to uh account for their uh you know what's actually going on yeah exactly but it's like it's it's a it's a very

bizarre way to do it is all i'll say the nudity well also because mike mancini is kind of like the whole like most of the episode is him being like do we really want to talk about this like literally like the episode like are we Are we really doing this? Are we going to do this, really? Well, you can also tell Scott, not only is he saying, like, make it sexy or whatever, he's trying to hijack the story and, like, tell it, you know, his way or whatever. Like, he keeps cutting her off. And they're having this awkward fight where she's like, no, let me tell it.

And I'm just like, oh, man. And, like, Jane gets it right away. And Michael's like, this guy's the best. We'll go. Here's the mozzarella sticks. Yes, here is 48 matriette. sticks for you, Michael. That's your entree. Dude, you know what?

Mazzarella Stick Challenge, man. I don't know that I could do 48, but I can eat a lot of... Great question. The lower 48. I don't know. The weird thing about mozzarella sticks is it's always different, right? Are we talking about those like flat Fridays-esque mozzarella sticks? No, I'm talking about, you know... Guys, there's no bad mozzarella stick.

Oh, I've had bad mozzarella sticks, dude. If you get kinds where, like, like the breading is too thick. And then it's kind of like a fish fry with cheese inside of it. I think I've had that style. But it's like it's still fucking cheese, so I'm happy. Fair enough. But let's say just for the sake of argument that, you know, this mozzarella stick challenge,

it's just your standard, like, you know, cylindrical. Sure. Three inch mozzarella stick. Gotcha. Three inches. I think I'm, yeah, I think I'm topping out at like 30 maybe tops. Oh, man. That's a lot.

Yeah. Oh, I think, I think it would be. two dozen and that's where I'd probably I'd probably like given the opportunity given the proper motivation I could I could do it all I could go all the way we could be the we could be the Joey chestnut of mozzarella sticks

yeah yeah go over the top I mean I guess clear my schedule for the next day though are you dip it in marinera sauce that might make it go down quicker but then that's more it's a little heavier that that's yeah I mean that's the gamble you're bargain yeah I think it's up to the

the mozzarella stick eater here's what I think you down like five to 15 and then like to relube the throat you you get some of that mariner on the next couple depends on the temperature of that marinera sauce too if it's too hot you're going to scold and then you're losing whole seconds but then gooey cheese goes down easy I'm getting kind of can you isolate that so I could just listen to it gooey cheese goes Meanwhile, thankfully meanwhile, you know, Allison, again, it's just like being bullied by Billy at this point. She's just like, you know, I'm just going to go to bed. He's like, Alton, it's 8 o'clock.

Come on. Let's go get a cappuccino. Dude, it's insane. This, I think, is one of the creepiest Billy Campbell lens we've had yet. Yes. Because he's like, you know, Allison, I've been keeping track of your sleeping. And I was like, what did you just say? He's like, you're 15 hours a day.

way too much. He pulls down a chart, like it's a big map, and it's just all the places she's been over the last week. And he's saying something, you know, like, oh, I'm just scared you're going to call him, like call Keith back or whatever. Oh, yeah? Okay, try sleeping through this. Chapter 47, finding himself thus cradden and hoisted onto a cart. Don Cachote said, I have read many profound accents of night errantry. Oh, is that, oh, what was that sound? Oh, is Allison jumping out the window? Oh, it's so...

It's so fucking creepy. I mean, it's like, he's basically, like, his argument is like, oh, I'm saving you from depression, Alathan. And it's, like, nobody... And she even says, like, dude, nobody fucking asked you, dude. Like, I'm going through this, but he's like, oh, we just want you to get back to normal. And she's like, well, maybe I won't get back to normal

because my life has been ruined by a tall fucking, a tall dude. by a stupid tall marine biologist who wouldn't divorce his wife and I have a piece of shit roommate Goodbye I think that's got a lot to do with it Joe now runs afoul of the riverboat Strangler here she's moving in

And he's like Don't ever use your water pipes When I'm using my water pipes Here's a coupon to the local riverboat He's like looking at her stuff He picks up a box she has and she's like what are you CIA or just fucking nosy and he's like no i just it was in front of my house so it's mine it's like i don't know dude i think his thing is like you know i tried

to open my door to leave my house and a box was in front of it so uh mine i guess so and like they're kind of it's kind of flirty but it is like jake is really everyone is like really trying to be friends with this woman and aside from the fact that and this is when jake is like oh yeah by the way, the water situation is, you know, it's kind of shitty. If you use your hot water, I can't use mine and vice versa. So we have to like kind of keep in touch when we're going to be showering or whatever. And that's what I'm like, okay, cool, I'm going to move. Like, everyone has been horrible and I'm going to move.

Yeah, and also, like, you've proven you can move pretty fast, Joe. So, like, just pack all those boxes again and try apartment number two, you know. Like Billy and Allison, I think, are trying to be friends. Jake is trying to fuck her from, like, beginning. I was kind of surprised he didn't bring up the fact that he fucked the lady who lived here before her

Well that's the thing is like Joe is the Sandy replacement So just so you know I fuck everyone Who lives in this apartment Sooner or later You'll be mine

One day Rhonda will fall two And then I will have them all Three sim with Michael and Jane A couple of weeks ago That was hot That was pretty great The pizza was delicious too beforehand thank you michael but then gooey cheese goes down easy i've even made out with mel row

gotta catch him all know what i mean there's a weird thing that joe says uh where um someone i don't know if it was ronda someone in the building like basically gave her the rundown of who everybody is or something like that because she's like because he says oh i'm jake and she goes oh jake the motorcycle officiantado. She says Ronda gave her the rundown.

It was Ronda. Okay. Yeah, it's like this Billy the writer and then there's Jake the nosy one and there's something like that and he's like

all right message received like I don't know I don't know how many times you have to hear to leave this fucking woman alone. Oh well she also says when he introduces himself or something she goes

to introduce herself Joe the private type yes exactly like that i.e., get the fuck out of my face that conversation and ends with a steamy line though where she goes

I'll think of you every time I shower Nice Just laying the groundwork By the way we should say At the end of that dinner scene Jane and Liz go to the bathroom And Liz is wearing this really

flowy big outfit to hide a bunch of stuff And Jane's like oh weird You have a stain Let me just rip your clothes off In the middle of this bathroom And she finds Oops that this woman has bruised all over her body And she kind of gets

She now gets the picture on the way back, Michael is like, Jane, you're crazy. You're crazy. Listen, Jane, he owns a boat. How could he hit his wife? It's all I'm going to say. It's all I'm going to say.

No man who's ever owned a boat has abused his wife. It's a rule. It's also weird. Like, I don't understand what this line is because he's, they're arguing, like, in the cars. By the way, he's driving this boxy-ass 1990s fucking, like, Molder and Scully rental car thing.

I love this automobile that he's got going on. And they're talking about whether or not, you know, they need to get involved or whatever. And Michael's like instantly not believing that this woman's being beaten. And he goes, when did you get so nosy? And her response is, well, when did you get so political? And I was like, what?

I think political meaning caring about his future at the hospital. Oh, right, right, right, right, right, right, right. The politics of the hospital, not like, you know, whatever. I mean, maybe it was political in terms of like, I don't know, whatever the fuck. Bush was spouting off about at this point. Yeah, there was a, there was a, like, a C plot line that was cut out with Michael going door to door for H.W.

Well, I was going to say, I mean, if he doesn't care about men beating their wives, then he's going to love Donald Trump. That's for goddamn sure. Andrew, did you notice who plays, Liz? I couldn't, right. I thought it was, um, oh, uh, the woman from empty nest, but it wasn't. It's Lisa Waltz who did, who did one of the, like, first big X-Files episode's Shadows

where the ghost guy is killing all the all the like this lady has a boss who died and then he comes back as a ghost and like kills everybody who tries to kill her oh yeah I kind of vaguely remember that one okay so she's like the

the creep of the week in that episode I mean she's not a creep but like yeah she's battling the creep of the week yes that is it gotcha gotcha Gotcha. Yeah, I thought it was, I thought she first was Park Overall from Empty Nest. She looks a little bit like her. Yeah, she's like a voice on the critic. Anywho. Oh, that's cool. I've been itching for some X-Files rewatching.

The first season's good. Might have to have, there's a lot of good seasons. Might have to do that at some point. So, Joe is still moving in. Billy shows up, and he's, I think he helps her move a box or something. Oh, he's carrying the hilarious huge plant. And she's like, oh, thanks so much. She's like, oh, yeah, what are you doing? I'm a photographer.

She's like, oh, good, I'm a writer. And she's like, wow, I didn't know real writer's word. LA's like, you know what, fuck you? He freaks out. He freaks out. He freaks out. Oh, that freaking attitude. You know, if you love New York so much,

why don't you stay there? He does, like, the line is something about, like, you know, you love, all you New Yorkers love talking shit about L.A., then why do you all move out here? Yes. And I was like, well, Well, you'll find out soon enough, Billy.

But also, yeah, you kind of have a point. She calls him Bill at one point, too. That was unsettling. Yeah, that's true. But she's right. Like, he's not a real writer. He had a canceled column in, like, a free zine. And then he wrote the hackiest screenplay in the world.

Look, I wrote about my life adventures for the penny saver. And you know who gets the penny saver? Everybody, Joe. Everybody. And I do think I agree with Joe here. I'm not super comfortable calling a grown man Billy. So I'm going to call it Bill. Yeah.

Until I'm really corrected. Her phone rings here. It's a big clue. Rings a bunch and she doesn't pick it up. And Billy's like, well, that's odd. It's like, it's none of your business. You have no idea. You know what I mean?

Like, leave it alone. And he is hanging on this unpicked up phone call for the rest of the episode. Who doesn't pick up a fucking phone, Allison? What I want to know? You know who doesn't, Allison? Spies. I think Joe's a spy. I'm going to go right about it. Yeah, why don't you do that? She worked for H.W. Meanwhile, Michael and Jane are still kind of arguing about this the next day, whether or not this guy's abusive.

And she kind of settles on a really hacky line where she's like, well, maybe I just got too into that movie of the week that I watched. last year, and Michael's like, well, there you go. It's you watching all that feminine crap. I'm going to call the cable company and get Lifetime Bantble. I told you we should be confronting these evils in season one, okay? Dude, just the idea of like, oh boy, I guess it was just that movie I watched. Like, I'm sorry, Jane, you took off this woman's shawl

and there's fucking finger-shaped bruises on both of her arms. arms you know what's up your husband's a piece of shit which you also know go with your gut maybe the movie did it i do yeah i mean like also like any time a woman has a black eye it's a real like red fucking flag like what's happening it's like oh and then it's all and whenever it's like clumsy clumsy old me it's like uh unless it's like boxing class what she said exploded pipe i'm like a pipe went into your eye. I'm like,

this would be much, like, harder, like, there would be a, a bandage over this. Yes. So,

um, she, so like, that's kind of that. We kind of go back. We're doing some laundry right about here. We're doing some laundry. This is what Allison,

uh, very depressed Allison, uh, is trying to do some sad laundry. She finds Keith's shirt. And is really sniffing the shit out of it, dude. Dude,

it's like he fucking died or something. It's, it's the broke back sniff. It is. It is a hardcore Jillenhall sniff right here. I can smell his lameness. No, you know what it is? She's smelling the beach, man.

She just misses that beach house. That's true, dude. I think it's got nothing to do with Keith. I think anyone could live in that beach house, maybe except Billy. Someone should make a cologne called The Beach. Yeah, so Joe comes down here now. She's trying to do laundry. And, of course, everything sucks at Melrose Place.

And I mean, I guess the idea is like, you know, we're just like 20 something starting out, man. It's like, I don't know. If the fucking laundry machine doesn't work, Michael's got to fucking fix it. Totally. I should not be having to replace it. Yeah, I should not be having to kick appliances to make them work. And, you know, if your laundry room is like quarter operated or whatever, there's also some line about like, oh, beware, the dryer eats quarters. Like, I think Billy tells her that or something.

And I'm like, why is that a thing you just accept? Fucking fix it. Because you get these bonding moments over laundry. We saw one with Jake and Billy recently. Now we get one with Joe and Allison. And it's just this kicking and laughing and laughing and kicking. Allison, you know the laundry machines would work for you if you gave me your monthly blood pipe. Yeah, they accept blood.

You're still using quarters. What for? I made it blood operated. Yeah, you got to, for the dryer, it's kids' blood. for the washer, it's your blood. It's real easy, though. They upgraded the system last summer. It's just a pinprick. It's just like a diabetes test.

See, they kicked it so hard, their feet started to bleed, and it was like, that's why it activated it. Acceptable. Yeah, I just, I mean, like, moving into Millerow's place, I'm surprised nobody, Billy isn't coming around with a large drink for her to have every day. Oh, this will help you. Oh, drink up, Joe.

Drink right up. You need to be intoxicated at all time, here at Melrose Place. I mean, I'm shocked they didn't organize like a barbecue by the pool as like as an event for the new arrival. Yeah. That's the thing too is like again this show kind of blunders and I mean like you know, talking about domestic abuse is always

important but like when you're trying to introduce a new character like it just makes me not think about this new character because of you know what I mean like as always they never know how to land the plane on this show or juggle anything. So meanwhile

while Jane is meeting back with Liz, oh, by the way, Joe and, yeah, Joe and Allison become fast friends because of the bondover laundry. Jane and Liz are hanging out doing this fucking decorating, and like Liz finally comes clean, like, oh, yeah, he hit me, but it was just the one time, and now we're like, we're full on doing it, and she admits it. And then it's the night of the big old mixer,

and on the way there, Michael's like, listen, Nobody knows she's not asking you for help. She's still alive. It's none of our business. It's all a lifetime movie, Jane. It's all lifetime movies. And those always work out fine. So we just got to hang back and then it'll be over with soon.

No, go. Oh, and listen, you know what, Jane? I watch some of those lifetime movies. You don't want to be the neighbor. The neighbor always gets it, okay? You could die, Jane. You could fucking die. Now shut up and get in there.

You know what, Jane? I watched a Lifetime movie two last week. It was called The Nosey Neighbor Bucle. So he's like, listen, we don't know what's going on, and we certainly won't know tonight. Just give me the night. It's a really important mixer. We go to the mixer.

Everyone's having a blast, except for Liz, who's sitting by herself. Allison goes up to her, and she's like, hey, are you okay? You can talk to me. She kind of storms away. And Scott goes up to Jane, and here's the thing, Scott.

Oh, man. You're in public. You know what I mean? like this is not this is not your you really got to be on your best behavior here you know that you're you're on thin ice as it is and he grabs jane at least twice and he's like listen jane i don't know what you think you heard kind of a thing he puts a switchblade in her nose and says you know what happened to nosy kitties they lose their noses it's L.A it's an awful like uh he's like oh you women and then like grabs her

oh, this dude's losing it in public. Not a great, not a great idea for you, scumbag. Michael shows up and he's like, oh, what's going on over here? And he's like, oh, Michael. She's like, what are you saying? And he's like, I don't know, Jane. I had six drinks. I don't know what I'm saying.

I'm like, you fucking weirdo man. You fucking scumbag. Forget it, Jane. It's Melrose. But he goes, oh, Michael, good to see you. You know, you got to meet Maldonado in pediatricians. He's a great guy. die-hard Italian. He's going to love him.

Oh, that gets his fucking nose up in the air. Oh, there's another one. Where is he? I don't even... What is a die-hard? Like, is he... You could say full-blooded Italian. Like, you can be a die-hard Mets fan. You know what I mean? Like... This should be a die-hard starring Bruce Willis sequel,

die-hard Italian, and he's jumping off the fucking leaning tower of Pisa as it explodes. Look, come to the... come to the Malfi Coast, have a few laughs. I'm going to say, a die-hard Italian. I hear that, and I'm thinking the guy's got, like, posters of Mussolini in his fucking home. That's the thing.

He's, yeah, pictures of Mussolini. He's, he eats nothing that doesn't have tomato sauce on it. Dude fucking loves Christopher Columbus. Like, he's a die-hard Italian. Danny Aiello is the star of do the right thing. He's the good one. I'm going to say, Danny Aiello is the, is the, is the picture the poster boy for being a diehard Italian

Oh, that also could have been something there. Yeah, exactly. He he fucking hates Michael in the godfather because he's the one who's trying to make the family go clean. No, everybody's got to make a fucking living. I'm a die-hard Italian. Much like what is it, was it? Oh, Chris Cuomo, not the governor, the idiot on TV who said that saying, calling someone Fredo is like

the N word for Italians. You ever remember that one? Oh, I do remember that, yeah. That always tickled me. Like, let's know, it's just like a nuclear insult for you. Yeah, exactly. You know, a reference to a film that came out in my lifetime. And is also specifically referencing the failed

dufous younger brother. Exactly. And die-hard Italians definitely have that saying on a plaque above their doorway. Chris Cuomo. We come back to to Joe and Allison, they're having some cocktails in Joe's place.

And this is what Allison needs. Get good and drunk. Go out of the town with a friend of yours that isn't your mouth-breathing roommate. Exactly. Just go out. They're drinking just tequila and lime juice. Oh, my God. They're getting fucking lit.

They're sharing stories. Joe mentions she's recently divorced. There is this poster. There's a big picture of, and it's clearly like Daphnees Zaniga in black and white. And Allison's like, who's that? It's the person sitting to your left. It is kind of funny, though. I have to give it up right here to what's her face.

Courtney Thorntzmith? Yeah, because we've been busting on her a lot on the show, but there was a great fucking reaction here because they're both supposed to be drunk-ish. And, you know, she does the who is that? And Joe's like, oh, you know, that's me, a younger me, a married me, or whatever it is. And her reaction is she just goes, oh.

Like a wasted, like, huh? So great. I mean, Jake's hot, right? Yeah, let's change the subject from whatever that was. Yeah, well, that's how she gets her to talk about. Oh, yeah, you know, my husband back in New York, yada, yada, yada, yada. I was in a bad place, this, that, and the other thing. Yada, yada, yada, pizza the hut, you know.

Yada, yada, something called barf. She yada yada yadaed over the best part. I have not seen Space Balls in quite some time I've got to just bite the bullet and do it Yeah I still really like it I might be a minority there but It's fun

I think I've talked about this before where I will You know it's like the weather I will flip flop on Mel Brooks movies But the last time I rewatched Space Balls was maybe Ah geez So definitely like the last apartment So I don't maybe like a year and a half

I go two years ago something like that it held up i was laughing i was having a good time gotta give it a shot um so like they wind up going to shooters she's like let's get out of here they go to shooters uh there's two hunks uh that are playing pool with them they are losing they've lost a couple games and then joe is like why don't we raise the stakes and it's like cool 80 bucks or you have to go out with us and it's i don't know like it's it's always bizarre betting with a date kind of a thing right especially when you're already in the middle of a night out. Yes. Like, what are we

talking about? Like, does this night continue and we're obligated to hang out with you? Or are we talking, like, separate invitations for a different evening? I mean, it's creepy no matter which way you slice it, because it's just like, okay, the bed is, if I beat you at pool, we have sex.

Yes, that's the implication. It is creepy anyway. So, Joe's like, you're on. And she winds up seeking the whole, is very good at pool she like nails every shot the guy's like you cheated us you bitch and she's like

well this bitch just beat your ass and kind of storms off this guy by the way is ready to risk it all at shooters because he's ready to fight this woman and like people are holding him back as they storm out it's crazy it's the other guy

that they're playing pool like one guy just loses it he's like that's it I'm going to throw away my whole life and beat this woman up in this bar in front of 50 people. And the other guy's like, wait a second, Jeff. Maybe that's not a great idea. And he's trying to like hold him back.

And no, like, everyone in this crowded bar is like, is that guy chasing that woman? Because he is like running from the back of this bar. Jeff, Jeff, Jeff, Jeff, how about we don't break the beer bottle? Okay. How about we don't do that? I just love how this episode is like, you know, we're going to balance this. This is pretty heavy.

This is pretty heavy. Let's just balance it with having some almost assault. on other women. Dangerous place. Los Angeles in the early 90s, man, it's a dangerous place to be a woman. That city will chew you up and spit you out, dude. Meanwhile, you know, so Michael and Scott

kind of get into a little bit in the intern locker room. And he's like, listen, I could never beat my wife. I love her so much. He's like, good chick's out with me. Well, Michael's really doing this like, I don't know, man, whatever you do at home is your business. Me and Jane is staying out of it. Which that is like the fucking most cowardly piece of shit line, Michael.

And how about this, dude? You're a fucking diehard Italian yourself, Mr. Mancini. How about like, okay, sure, you know, whatever you guys do at home is whatever you do at home. Hey, why are you grabbing my wife? Like, that's my number one. That's what I'm leading with is why are you grabbing my wife at parties? I mean, the interesting thing is that knowing where Mike ends up in this series as it goes on, this is kind of him talking to himself

it is so weird to think about where Michael Mancini goes and where he starts and like it's just this bizarre because he is an outright super villain at some point you know what I mean like yeah what's you doing killing people kind of sort of right well he's like there's a thing that happens later and we unfortunately in this run of

Melro 2 and oh will not get to it but eventually when he starts like sleeping with Kimberly Shaw and then like Jane finds out about it she makes him go to marriage counseling and like a light switch he turns on this sociopathic like I don't know what she's talking about I mean our marriage is totally fine she's crazy it's like that kind of a thing I thought you've been watching movies again I think you're talking like a Batman the animated series he gets hypnotized that he becomes two-faced kind of a thing that'd be a nice twist I mean he does wind up like also let me talk to

big Mike doesn't like to be Top two, Mrs. Torrance. But, yeah, like, I mean, there's some crazy shit. Also, like, Kimberly turns out to be fucking wild and crazy also, so, like, with their powers combined kind of a thing. He's not, like, an outright serial killer. He's just, like, a totally insane sociopath kind of thing. Is he the one who's lighting up the dynamite, or is it Kimberly?

Kimberly starts the fire at the end of, like, whatever it is, like, the second or third season. There is dynamite? She blows up, like, part of the apartment complex. or something like that. It's insane. I'm so excited for this. It's why I will keep watching this show while we're on hiatus with it and then just gladly

rewatch it later. Yes, we're coming back at a big bad way with both of these shows in Patreon either at the end of this year or the beginning of the next. Guaranteed. So everyone relax. But as we're continuing, so that's kind of the end of the Michael and Scott scene. He kind of barely

confronts him and just basically says rolls over. It's just the whole like, Michael, I would never you know well good enough for me go go later that night they got a call and it's like really inconveniencing

Michael Mancini's night out at the movie this dude is going on and at the start of the scene is like Jane we're missing the previews go do you know what came out the day that this episode came out yeah you looked it up what do we got box office a story okay so there's two of them

that were opening literally the day this episode aired I always go open opening night. The one is Disney's Aladdin. Yeah. That's for babies. The one I prefer to imagine who they saw was previous episode Traces of Red

with Linda. That's it. That's it. And Jim Belushi. Yep. I never miss Jim in the theater. Yo, Jim, I'm your number one fan. Best Blues brother. I mean, yeah, the right Belushi died. Yeah. And I mean, also like

dude, I hate people that fucking play fast and loose with this shit. You should not be in risk of missing the previews. That's on you, Michael. Yep. No, this is insane. 30 minutes ago. It's insane. But they get a call and it's Liz and she's like, I really need help.

And then it turns into the beginning of Invisible Man of the Invisible Man from this year. Because we drive out and she's by herself. They pick her up. She is really, really beat up. This pickup scene really quickly. this pickup scene, not a shockingly not a lot of comedy to be mined from this. However, just due to like, it's the early 90s, he's driving this boxy fucking two-door car to pick her up. And then this music hits, what you're looking at is sort of like one and the same

from an unselfed mysteries reenacted. Because they up this like spooky music is they're like pulling up to the house and like here's, you know, Liz is like standing in the driveway, like in a trench coat kind of hiding and everything. And I'm just imagining like, Liz McBain was last seen being picked up by two friends.

Update. You have any information. Update. Scott McBain, formerly of Melrose Hospital, has quit. Just quit. Scott McBain is now working in the Trump administration on the response to the COVID.

panic. Update. Update. Scott McBain says you don't need to wear a mask. Oh, mercy. They pick her up. I really wish I was dead too.

Put me down for that? Four for wishing we were dead. I'll have what they're having. I wish you were dead, wish you were dead. Yeah, four I wish you were dead. They go back. they're they're cleaning Liz up Michael has a scene here where he apologizes to Liz because he didn't believe her and like oh he's just so charming and she's like yeah that's what he's

charming with me they have a nice hug jane that's crazy you can kind of see so just speaking of like the you know lunacy that he gets involved in later there's a thing where she's like you know he wasn't like this when we got married it's all the hospital the hospital did this He works so much at the hospital. He's seen all these horrors at the hospital. And, like, the shot is on Mancini. And he's just, like, staring at her, like, wide-eyed. Like, oh, boy, the hospital's going to do that to me.

It does, right? I mean, it's something, I guess. Yeah, it's crazy. So they just, they kind of come to understanding that this guy's a piece of shit. They're going to get her out. Meanwhile, Joe and Allison end their night. at the dunes where Allison made out with Jake, which is where she takes all of the days.

I think they're in the hills. The hills, I'm sorry. And they're just, you know, Joe's revealing more about herself. She takes out these pills, which are, you know, her therapist recommended she takes. And she's like,

I don't need a safety net anymore. And she throws them away. And I'm like, that's not really triumphant. Well, I think what you're supposed to take from this is she has some line about like, well, they're doctor prescribed,

but my husband made the doctor prescribe them kind of a thing. And let's just say that that's more of her secret. Well, time for some violent mood swings. I'm throwing these pills out, cold turkey. The craziest detail is... I'm tired of not having hallucinations. The craziest detail in this whole thing is that Joe calls Allison Al. And I just started singing that Paul Simon song.

Chevy Chase comes down, puts down a chair. Exactly. Chevy Chase brings the pill bottle back up the hill. I'll take these. I'll take these. Glug, glug, glug. Swallow it. I think that's the thing, is like they're trying to make her sound a little different than the other characters.

So she's calling him Al and Bill. Maybe she'll call Jake J at some point. Oh, J. Oh, that could be. So. She's going to call Rhonda Ronnie. They'll have to call Rhonda much in a couple of weeks. So she leaves the show. She does, yes.

The last scene with Michael and Scott is back in the intern locker room, and he's like, I don't know what she told you, man, but she's lying. And this is when Michael gets kind of violent with the dude. He's like, you want to fucking hit somebody, you hit me, Baba Gool. And it's like that kind of a thing. We're doing that. And it's like, listen, I'm going to go. Is he getting until 11, right?

No, I'm not an intel 11, but I'm about to. and he's like, but you should do it yourself. And then he's like, will you come with me as a friend? And I'm like, no, I don't know. You shit, you fucking piece of garbage. Yeah, no thanks, wife, beater. Go fucking quit your job on your own, you piece of shit. How does it even like work?

Like, you go into the office with the guy and he's like, okay, well, what did both of you need to see me for it? The receptionist, like, at the front of the doctor's office is like, well, uh, uh, Scott. you know, we're not going to let you in to resign unless you have your resignation buddy with you. Oh, Michael, I didn't see you there. All right, come on in. At first, Michael refuses, but then, well, Scott is waiting in the hallway like a sad puppy dog. We should feel bad for Scott, by the way.

Yeah, definitely. We, you know, um, uh, he, it's the stress of the jobs, Steve. He's saving so many lives. He's allowed to take a few. That's a good point, Eric. And he's willing to, you know, quit his job. So, you know, he, he suffered too, Steve. it's double bullshit because they try to add up that sympathy with him by making him a pediatric surgeon so on top of that all it's like oh but Michael

you just don't understand these kids keep dying and I'm like yeah that they do that some of them maybe you should be a better doctor yeah maybe you shouldn't be a fucking wife beater you shitty doctor well yeah he's quitting doctor because he's shitty he's going professional with the wife beating he wants to stop the importing and focus solely on the expert

I mean, starts working for Trump, then he'll be killing kids for real. Yeah, that's what he'll be doing it. He's going to be the fucking ICE detention center surgeon. Michael, these kids just keep dying. We just got to find like a cage that we can put him in off to the side and people will forget about him and let him die there. Funny, you should say that. What a great idea.

So that bad snooze, Michael does go with him to help him. resign or whatever I don't think there's another Joe scene right are we done yeah the end scene the last moments of the episode are with Joe oh that's right well first it's Billy and Allison and Allison's just like you know Billy

I think I needed my night out with Joe really helped me get over this whole thing well fucking finally dude he's sitting like she comes home from her night out with Joe and he's sitting and she's like oh you waited up for me again he's sitting there reading one of her

like red book magazines or whatever in this fucking ridiculous Hawaiian shirt. Yeah, if you're wearing a Hawaiian shirt, you should be going to a barbecue or the bar at the very least. You shouldn't be at home reading in a Hawaiian shirt. You're totally right, Chris Cabin. They are not hanging around the house shirts. And it's just, I don't understand this. Like, you, Allison, need to sit Billy down and be like, listen, dude,

if you don't keep, if you keep this shit up, you have to move out. You can't be monitoring my moods, waiting up for me when I go out without you. it's totally okay. Yep, exactly. I love that he was like going through the magazines, taking these tests of what a perfect man is. And he's like, I got it. I'm perfect.

He, uh, well, he's also given a bit of confidence right here because he's complaining like, oh, you're out all night with Joe, huh? Well, Joe, Joe, Joe, Joe, Joe, Joe, Joe, Joe, Joe, Joe, Joe, Joe, Joe, Joe, Joe, Joe, Shabado. You know, she doesn't always pick up the phone. Just things. You know, Allent.

this is crazy. I'm glad you had such a great time with Joe, but earlier this afternoon her phone rang, she didn't even pick it up. All right, that's it Allison. We're done with Don Quixote. Here we go. Frank Herbert Stewn. But she

fucking empowers him again right here, though, because she goes, don't worry, Billy. You're still my best friend. No way. Best friend. You've got to not give this guy any more room. It's bad. It's insane. So, the last scene is Joe, is this when she's talking to her dad or something? No, we should say the thing is she, when she moves into the apartment earlier on, she does, she makes a phone call.

Got it. She calls her father. She's like, hey, dad, I'm all right. I'm in L.A. I'll tell you more later. I got to go. Like, that's mysterious phone call. But, yeah, the end of it is, it's Grant Show.

Like, it just cuts to Grant Show opening the shower curtain. I was like, holy God, look at that. This dude's in shape. I mean, I think somebody, Aaron spells like, listen, you know, we introduced the new woman, good deal, dealing with this other subplot, a little heavy, we need a little beefcake. Oh, my plates look, we got a lot of vegetables, no beefcake. Oh, look at that cucumber, though, my goodness. He's named Grant Show for a reason, right? Now we get the show.

Grant's show and tell. Come on, Grant. Open the curtain. puffin and puffin because she's showering when he's supposed to be showering because she's using the water. So he's like fucking practically naked and it is glorious. He runs up bangs, bangs on her door

by the way. You can't be fucking cop knocking for a water issue. This is totally rude. It's totally rude and she's like, oh hello and he's like oh you know what about the fucking shower? And she's like, I was just brushing my teeth. Fuck! Dude, and that right

there tells you all you need to know why you should find you know, a sexy tenants be damned you need to find a different place to live because if one person is taking a shower and then another person in a completely different apartment just starts brushing their teeth and the water goes crazy that's a huge red flag that you should not live there you can't live like that that's how i grew up with the i'm serious like all the water well it's just a house but if you were taking the shower and someone used the water you're getting burned really just like like cold water to

brush your teeth? You could, um, well, the real, I remember the, the big things were dishwasher, laundry, or someone else taking a shower. Well, there's always a toilet flush move, which you can't do. Yes, the toilet flush was big. Yes, you're right. You can't be flushed in the toilet when someone's taking a shower because that will burn them. Well, you should, they should be happy they got this now because Melroo clearly used to work on the well system for this. Just go out and fill your tub and then heat it up on your own. How about that shit? That's the thing. Dude, Mel, Mel, Mel, Melro definitely involved in the Los Angeles water supply situation.

Like, he was all over the Chinatown story. Yeah, and it's also built over a well where a girl fell down. Yeah, we built an apartment complex over a well. That's the Mancini apartment for sure, right there. Oh, absolutely. Oh, look at Samara.

Jane, another horse committed suicide outside my fucking house. Jane, we have to kill our troubled daughter. We have to do it. it. I'm sorry. Their whole thing sort of ends with one of them says

have a nice day and the other one says I'll do my best and then it's an insane like Grant's show walking back to his apartment, you know like Jake is going back down the stairs and Billy's like standing outside reading the newspaper or something and he's like, oh what do you think? And it's

just Jake going definite possibilities. Oh yeah. And then we just have this like crane up, you know, to Daphne Zuniga on the tough floor. I gotta say they are playing around with some angles here. We have Joe like standing outside of the apartment

like on the second story walkway kind of thing. Angle here we have not yet seen on Melrose Oh yeah, this is a drink by Brian De Palma. Yes, yes, of course. He's using a lot of like the split diopter shots in this episode too. It's crazy. At the same time, the distance between

her and everyone, it's like she definitely heard them just go like, yeah, she's high. Oh, yeah, I think you're right because the whole, you know, like her facial expression is like, mm, mm, mm. Yeah, they cut around Jake's tented towel. Yeah, that's right. But definite possibilities is very much,

huh, guess we'll get into this each and every week here on Melrose Place. You got that right, dude, tune in next week. That Joe, I think even at some point somebody's like, that Joe, she's something else. It's like, really, we're really pushing. It's like, oh, she's, you know how Sandy sucks? Joe is totally better than

Sandy, right guys? Man, Joe is a new character. She's a new character, isn't she, folks? Yeah, she's a new character. That is a character we have not seen until this episode. And me, Jake, I'm a nude character. You two characters are going to Melrose Place.

Top Gun Joke. So that's the episode. Anybody, some parting shots? Are you excited to continue this for the next couple of weeks? Chris Cablet's start with you, parting shots or anything like that? Yeah, I mean, I thought this was a pretty effective episode. I don't know, like, how seriously they took everything, but, you know, I was intrigued the whole time. So, yeah, I'm into it.

They also make two Thelma and Louise references in this episode, which I found a little strange. Well, it's kind of funny because the first one happens at shooters, like when Joe is about to start, you know, running the table. And she looks at Allison and goes, ready, Thelma? And Allison's like, ha ha ha. And then later, like moments later, like when they're on the hill or whatever, she's like, wow, tonight was so much fun, Joe. It was like, we were kind of like Thelma and Louise. And I wanted Joe to be like, remember when I fucking called you, Belma, like back at the bar, you idiot? Hey, Joe, Joe, are we going to kill ourselves tonight?

Are we going to drive off of a bridge or something? Huh? Well, I already threw my pills away, so that's not going to be very easy. I have to find a Cadillac to go over. Eric, um, yeah, you know, um, this episode, I, I wasn't as crazy about it because I kind of, I'm missing like, like, give me a lighthearted episode to introduce a new character. We're coming off the wings of like Matt being a victim of a hate crime. And now we have spousal abuse. It's just like, I'm glad shows we're tackling these issues, but it's just like around all these dumb idiot characters trying to have fun. Um, but I am excited to continue, of course.

Andrew Juven Oh yeah I'm going to be well relieved to put the show on hiatus because we need a break around the WHM studios but I have been having a lot of fun with this

and I feel like it's unfortunately getting cut off like right when all the heavy hitters are like coming on the show permanently which is a bit of a bummer but I will say next week or two weeks from now with the next Melrose Place episode we do don't worry about it

Billy has a toothache and gets high on some medication. I like that idea. He's having some sexy dreams about a certain roommate of his that he monitors her sleep patterns. I can't wait. Yeah, I mean, I kind of agree with everybody here. I do think this is a bit too heavy, and laden of an episode to introduce a fun new character.

You should just probably lean into that and have a lighter bee story. But I was, you know, it was, I like a definis. in this role for what it is. You know, it's a fun show, and obviously I am very excited to continue, but also a bit sad to let it go, but yes, it'll be a very well-deserved break, but the show will come back.

I want to keep reiterating that. It's not going away forever because we've had too much goddamn fun doing it. So that's going to do it for this week next Tuesday. We've got a brand new episode on The Terminal coming up. We're really excited about that. Did Tom Hanks a kitchen picket? So that's going to be exciting.

We've got great stuff on the Patreon already. We've got an episode on Raiders of the Lost Ark coming out very shortly, if not out already, probably a little shortly. We've got an episode, we've got an animation damnation on the mass cartoon flying out already. We've got a gleep glossary on Bib Fortuna, a ton of great shit on all sorts of feeds. And we will let you know that even though this is going on hiatus, brand new episodes all throughout August, including episode 5,500, ladies and gentlemen. Holy shit.

So that's going to do it. We do want to remind you any and all merch sales on our website, WHMpodcast.com, the profits that we get go directly to Black Lives Matter and Black Lives Matter related to charities. And there's also an Act Blue Link there, which is where we're setting the stuff anyway, that you could give directly on WHMpodcast.com. We always want to reiterate that because that's more important than this silly show. Just putting that out there.

Until next week, I have been Stephen Sadek. Andrew Jupin. Eric Siska. Chris Gavin. Take it easy and remain indoors. And please, for the love of God, wear a fucking mask. Thank you. That was a hate gum podcast.

But then gooey cheese goes down easy.