We Hate Movies - S10: Episode 452 - I Now Pronounce You Chuck & Larry

Episode Date: November 12, 2019

On this week's episode, it's almost like the gang is going back to the Spooktacular as they discuss the absolutely abhorrent film "comedy," I Now Pronounce You Chuck & Larry! What's with Sandler's character's cartoonish sex addiction? Can firefighters be on the take? And could this film get any more disingenuous? PLUS: Gary Busey goes off-Broadway! I Now Pronounce You Chuck & Larry stars Adam Sandler, Kevin James, Jessica Biel, Dan Aykroyd, Ving Rhames, and Steve Buscemi; directed by Dennis Dugan. Unlock Exclusive Content!: http://www.patreon.com/wehatemovies See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This week on the program, my 2007 was a stupefying year for films. It's I now pronounce you, Chuck and Larry. I'm Andrew Jupin. Steven Zadak. Chris Cabin. Eric Siska. And we hate movies. Hello, everyone. Welcome to We Hate Movies. Thank you for tuning in. As always, that's right. This week we are heading to Sandler Town. It's I now pronounce you, Chuck and Larry, from 2007 directed by Dennis Dugan. Of course, this has got to be the, it's hard. It's a lot. It's

hard to say the worst because there's so many of them and I checked out so long ago that I'm not even sure. You're talking about films from the Sandman. Yes, for Sandler films and not movies that he's appeared in but Sandler movie. For the Happy Madison Collector. Yes, exactly. Well, I'll say

earlier this year we watched murder mystery and like it's not good but it's not like oh my God Adam Sandler movie. Yeah, sure. It's just kind of silly. And how about you saw uncut gems on the festival circuit is that. Well, that's, that's

excellent. That's like him. Well, that's him being in a movie with, like, good directors. Yeah, Dennis Dugan directed that. He was in the Noah Baumbach movie, Meyerwitz stories. I skipped that. He's very good in that. Yeah, that's kind of what I heard. I mean, I'm sure it's really good. It's good movie. I like that movie. But then you get

back to, like, instantly now. And I'm not going to go through all these. There's some more recent ones, though, the Netflix things, this Sandy Wexler, the do-over with him in space. I watched that. Is that right? Yeah, I wish I could do that afternoon.

Well, the whole Netflix thing was like, it was Skynet went online. There was a manageable amount of Adam Sandler Happy Madison movies. And then it's splintered. And you're like, I don't even know how many there are anymore. Go down the list. Ridiculous six. Ridiculous six was, I think, the first of those Netflix specific movies. That's when you really realized.

Oh, the week of, that was him and Chris Rock. Nope. how quickly these things get pushed out, like how quick he can do these movies. It's like a month tops and you're in and out. It's absolutely crazy. And then before, see, because then you get to 2015 previous episode pixels. Gotcha. Blended with Drew Barrymore. I hear that one is specifically bad and I've never seen it. Yeah, I don't know. So I can't put that on my list, but I would say this is definitely my least favorite of the bunch. See, because I can only go by like what I've seen and I actively don't watch

these unless we do them for the show. Like we did an episode on grownups too. I watched that. We did pixels. I watched that. But like I'm, unless it's for show purposes and never say never, of course. Yes. But like, I'm never going to watch Jack and Jill for no reason. For no reason. I guess I watched it for no reason.

I mean, I watched the YouTube clip of Al Pacino fucking sashaying in that Dunkin' Donuts. Yeah. We had a Adam Sandler double feature last night. bedtime stories and click I love all the sappy bullshit and the shooting

or like that's my boy like why am I gonna watch that's my boy nobody's gonna watch I have better things to do with my weed thank you very much what was the one that made you check out though like totally check out great question I was I was in on big day

I mean I love obviously I loved all you know obviously Billy Madison happy Gilmore sure those are great and like they're great hungover stone movies whatever. Legitimately like

Billy Madison and Happy Gilmore Wedding singer is a great movie. Wedding is the best movie of the bunch I think of those movies. Here it was tough because it was like

I was done and then another one happened and I was back in it and then I think I was done again so I never now nor when it came out gave a shit about

the water boy I did not think that Bobby Bouchet character was funny. I think that might have been that a little Nicky was like no things

but here's the The thing, in betwixt that, though, Waterboy was 98, 99 was Big Daddy, which I did really like. I did like Big Daddy. And then 2000, it goes right back to Little Nicky and I was like, nope again. I think Little Nicky's the one. Like, I really had a hard time getting through that one. That was what he was doing. Like, he did two characters talking out of the side of their mouth and I'm like, I'm not going to watch that for 90 minutes.

And then I think other people were talking about the sides of their mouth. Yes. Like some of his buddies. Like, and then it brings us back to this movie because they're all in it. all those dudes that saw Adam Sandler kill that girl and just get the free pass to be in all these fucking movies? I don't know how this works.

I guess Norm McDonald was in the bathroom. Ah, man, I could only be in some of them. Wait, what happened to her? What happened? What's this? Whoopo-babid-de-boo? That's what happened to her. Adam, you're covered in blood. What's going on here?

If she hadn't a bobba to booed, When I asked her to yab-a-d-d-do-da-da. The fifth time you said that. She wouldn't be dabbidi-du-dibing right now. In hell. This was him. Bobbidi. This was him.

Boob-de-boo-dy. This was him. Babbidi-boo. And I did. I bomb-de-boodder. You're going to be. How about that? How about that?

Do a Reservoir Dog's parody. That's it? Yeah. I bet that'll be a Netflix in like two months. now that we said. Oh, sure. He could do like a crime thing like that. The one thing about the guys that are hanging on, it's but like the three guys, it's Alan Covert who's somebody, not somebody, he's in grandma's boy. Yeah, he got his own solo album with that one. This is a lot because I've just been calling them somebody one and somebody two. And somebody three. There's a three of them. There's a three one. Yes. At least of mine. Allen Covert is one of the dudes. I also now include this because it's been so many movies at this point. Nick Swartson is part of this. Yeah, he's kind of there. I think it's kind of a question. I think it's kind of a question. quartet these days. But he's sort of a legitimate entity of his, like he showed up in Reno 911, not that matters,

but it's like, these are guys that only cannot leave the Adam Sandler estate, or they turn to sand. So the other two are Jonathan Lofrin and then Peter Dante. Those are the two dudes that play like the metal heads and Little Nicky. Got it. Yeah,

and one of them, I think the taller dude was on that good episode of Undeclared with Adam Sandler, wherein like, he's playing like Adam Sandler's scummy friend, which makes a lot of sense. It was like autobiographical. Yeah, then they just kept rolling with that. But like the Spade and Schneider thing, it's always kind of funny because like they, both Spade and Schneider have to debase themselves to be in an Adam Sandler movie.

Yeah, like you can be in this movie, but you have to be totally humiliated the entire time. And what can they do otherwise though? That's the whole thing. No, zero. Yeah. Have you seen any of that now with Rowan stones? and I don't mean to, it's fine, but that David Spade late-night talk show?

I haven't, but I've heard some people like it, and if you can still do like the snarky spade thing, like, that's fine. I don't care. The Rob Schneider is where I have a problem. The Netflix show. What show is that? Real Rob.

What is it called? Real Robb? Real Robb, yeah, that sounds right. Yeah. Didn't we also have a sitcom on CBS, though? That was like... Those years ago, yeah. This is relatively new.

I just can't keep track with all his projects. He's a very busy man. What I was going to say is, like, you know when he gets the call from, because sometimes it'll be like Schneider was bumped up to like number four in grownups. You know what I mean? Right. So like, you know what he gets the call? It's like, oh, cool, Adam, awesome.

I now pronounce you Chuck Lairie. Who am I? My chukra, my larry. It'd be hilarious. Me and you being like pretended to be gay. No, no, Rob, no. Rob, stop, stop, stop. You're just this racist character in the middle of the movie.

great, maybe next one for pixels. That could be like number five or something. Yeah, you can be a pixel. Rob, you're going to be the character that four separate writers quit before writing. So this movie, of course, falls firmly in that fucking despicable Adam Sandler world. And this is our existence of a post-grown-up society where Kevin James is now the Chris Farley surrogate in all these movies. Isn't this pre-grown-ups? I think this is pretty grown-ups. Oh, is this? Oh, you're right, actually, because grown-ups was

I think this was the adolescence. I think this movie was the dry run to see if you can replace our fat friend that died. Yes.

And it's, there are two firemen, New York City, straight firemen. I want to put that out there. These guys are straight. These guys are very straight.

Not only are they very straight, they're doing a very fucking cartoonish like Brooklyn. Like they're trying so hard to remind you that these two characters are from Brooklyn that due to circumstances

have to pretend that they're gay and married. And that's the entire two hour and five minute movie. To get their socialist benefits, these bozos. Firemen, the police, government stooges. It's just for one of them, though. It's just for Kevin James. Like Sandler's character doesn't care.

What does he have again? Like a fat disease? No, he's, well, he's a winner. I'm sorry, Kevin, you have fat disease. No! I think we've all been diagnosed. Oh, yeah. No one, no one ever wanted that.

phone call. I got it. I'm sorry, Stephen, it's your doctor. You've been diagnosed as fat. You should really come in. Let's not do this over. Why don't you just come? It's good news. It's good news, really. Besides, you have to sign your membership card in person, and you get your free fat guy jacket now. I remember being...

My medical checkup came with seconds. I remember being a kid, and every time I would go to my doctor. Oh, yes. He would just be like, oh, I've been like, oh, I've... of bronchitis. Oh, yes, your lungs are very, oh, you're very bad lungs. Oh, but also because you're fat. It's probably the lungs are very fat. They organ shame you. They do organ shame you. I remember when I was a kid. This might be TMI, Chris. Oh, boy. Dude was like, and this is a doctor trying to get me to lose weight. Of course. You know, kind of, this is a younger guy, kind of be like,

trying to be like a youth pastor or whatever. Is that, oh, man, do you break out an acoustic guitar? No, he's like, you know, your, your dick would look bigger if you're, you're lose some weight. Yep. Yep. That's one of the avenues that they try to go down. Cool. I'm 11. It wasn't, no, really? Maybe 12? That's insane. It was very young. See, I don't want to touch that. You're a little slimmer. Maybe I want to touch that. I think that, yeah, exactly. I was passed up on this. Sorry, I think I broke the microphone

with that. I did not see that coming. No, it was shocking news. Would it have been better if he was like 25? Yeah. But no. Freely. Remember. Like the same doctor's appointment, like five years later, the doctor was trying to subtly tell Eric that he should shave his pubs a little bit. Make your dick look a little bigger.

Trim those pubs back. Quite a canopy down here. Clear some of that brush. Burning the rainforest isn't always so bad. You'll look like a bald pluck chicken, but it'll be an impressive bald pluck chicken. Remember to rate five stars on iTunes. So, yeah, I mean, so we start.

start in the big city and it's Brooklyn there's like a Brooklyn rap song yeah and it's yeah whatever it's a Brooklyn rap song I was just bummed they should have had the fucking Beastie Boys Love Letter in New York song

They got the greasy boys They couldn't fucking afford the fucking Beastie Boys It's similar though because it's like Brooklyn Bronx something else like why didn't you just use the Beastie Boys song that's clearly better than whatever this song is but so they're playing basketball and because it's an Adam Sandler movie and

Kevin James is right alongside him they're both excellent at basketball don't even worry about it they could have been playing for the Knicks but they decided to be firefighters these are the coolest dudes I've ever seen also we buried the lead here Adam Sandler has a dick the size

of the island of Manhattan it starts right here immediately like and again like if so he's playing basketball and this very attractive woman is like you piece of shit you You totally, you fucked my twin sister and all the other firemen. Like, oh, here we go.

Because this is a regular occurrence. He's always having sex with sexy ladies. This is how the rest of the firefighters get a time out in the basketball game is because it's the time for a woman has to come down and berate him about his sexual antics. They get some popcorn from the machine. They get some waters up. They sit down and they have a day of it. He's like, how do I know it wasn't you?

Could you say butter my biscuit? Hobody-dibody-dubiddy. And she starts like going along with it And like she's like moaning too It's like you gotta say it more like you try to fuck me Or whatever the fuck you say And then your sister shows up And he's like now you two have to fuck each other

I don't care that you're related Dude it's the thing that is in movies And movies alone Which is let's have two biologically related people Make out and it's hot Exactly twins specifically And twins And driven so crazy by the

lust that Adam fucking Sandler doboy himself fucking stirs up in them. I don't know what's going on with that fucking hog downstairs dude, but it's got to be something mighty for them to put up on. I'll tell you what's going on with this fucking calendar. It's photoshopped. Have you seen this? Oh God. You're saying the fire host that is his dick in the photo is not actually his dick. No, what I'm saying is in the in the photo his shirt is off

and he, it's like a fucking Chris Hemsworth body and I'm like nice try everybody. Yeah, someone doodled that in Times Square. It's fake as fuck. But like the fire hose, it is detachable. Yeah, you can just take that off. You can just put it anywhere you like. So they get called it a fire.

You kind of, you realize that Kevin James's wife is dead and like that's a part of this movie. Yeah, that is, I mean, because it's one of the reasons why this happens. But like you see him like his little home life and he's like stupidly trying to make spaghetti. And it's like three sausage patties. He fucking keeps the jar of ragu in the microwave and then he's, guys, he's such a dumb heterostrate dude that he just grabs heated glass and burns his hands. Well, I just thought that's how you made good Italian food in Brooklyn, you know?

It's just how it's done. You can just hear Gordon Ramsey having a brain hemorrhage. Like, come on, Kevin! It's season 10! Damn, the ragu is raw. I did have a legitimate laugh when Kevin James refers to the meal that he's made. as a hot dog salad. Yeah, I will admit to laughing.

But, like, it doesn't, he's a firefighter. He should know how to microwave things. Aren't firefighters, like, famous for cooking? Yes. Isn't there that whole, like, oh, we all, once a week, everyone, someone cooks a meal? They make a good chili, usually. That's usually the big thing.

Well, yeah, it's beyond chili. But, yes, the notion is that firefighters, because you're there, you're at the fucking house. You've got to be able to cook for yourself. Getting taxpayer money. to sit around and cook. Okay. Tucker Carlson is in studio. This is a few ladies and gentlemen.

Just say firefighters, hashtag welfare kings. So the hot dog salad to me isn't nearly as disgusting as literally just plopping like hamburgers into pasta. That's really bad. You got to at least cut it up, brother. Do me a favor.

I thought he was going to then like kind of just mash it a little or something. And he's got a daughter and a son who likes musical theater, which is a big old joke. Oh, yeah. Could you imagine? Could you imagine?

Somebody get in here. So what the hell's the point with this health insurance? So his wife is dead. Who cares? It's not health. It should be health insurance. Sure. It's like pension benefits thing.

Yeah. Part of it is insurance, I feel. But the whole thing is he, so he's, no, you're right. It's like benefits. His pension, the life insurance. The lack of Medicare for All is making us gay. Oh, no. We're going to have to be gay.

All right. I got a stop here in Arkansas. I am going to hit the Medicare for All because we don't want our firefighters to pretend to be gay, do we? Look, you just don't want that Chuck and Larry movie to happen. I saw it. I regret seeing it in the theater. I heard it was based in Brooklyn, so I had to pay a ticket.

Boy, was I in. He's embarrassed sitting in that theater. I mean, he makes a good point. I don't know. I don't want that movie to come to life. They have, on the second, like, firefighting run that they do in the movie, an accident. Yes. And Kevin James' whole thing is, fuck, like, my wife is dead.

Yeah. And I can't get this benefit thing switched to somebody else, to my kids. Yeah, but if he dies, they're not going to get anything and they're going to be, you know. Okay. Welcome to America, dude. But wouldn't they be his next-a-kin match? That's the part of this movie There's a lot of question.

It's a very weird thing because he goes to the benefits office. Rachel Dratch is there. Good for putting Rachel Dratch in a movie. He's got to having fun. And it's like, oh, you know, you lapsed. You know, we sent you all these letters.

You didn't change after your wife to who your beneficiary would be. And he's like, well, I was mourning my wife. And they're like, well, you can change it but it takes a really long time. Or you can get married. And I'm like, well, why not just change it and it takes a really long time?

How long could it take? This is what I've been trying to fucking say. So he's scared that it's going to take too long and he's going to get killed on the job and then they're not going to get anything. That's why he wants to fast track it with this fucking ridiculous thing. What's the letters in the mail?

I don't know, man. It's a very weak premise. The premise should be like, oh, well, it's very weak. It's an Adam Sandler movie. It should be health insurance. It should be, health insurance. Like, oh, my kid's sick and I can't get the benefits. Yeah, give one of those little fuckers cancer.

Sure. I can't pay for the gay conversion therapy. Because babbidi-dubidi. I can't afford to have my kid fake kidnapped and sent to the Dominican Republic to one of those camps. Habidi-d-dubiddy-dubiddy. Have-d-d-d-indeed.

You ever see that documentary, Kidnapped for Jesus? It's horrific. It's fucking totally horrifying. It was a Showtime documentary. Surprise you missed it. Well, I tried to miss their program. So, yeah.

I mean, so he's like, yeah, they do this. Well, we should talk about the fat guy. I was going to say, we're getting way ahead of ourselves here. There's a fucking disgusting scene right out the jump in this movie. They go to fire to show you what good firemen they are. They're the best fucking firemen. Surprisingly, yeah. The FDNY has ever seen.

Because of them, there hasn't been a fire in Brooklyn for a hundred years. And we protect that fire. That's how good they are. And there's this really big guy. They hear like what they think is. This guy is, he's like, it's fake, it's fake fat. Yes. This is insane.

But like, it's like my 600 pound life situation. Oh, I can't get out of the bed, Undertaker. Kevin James, help me. Oh, Undertaker. My house is on fire. Oh, Undertaker, I'm stuck in this Adam Sandler movie. Well, maybe if he burns, he'll finally fit into that urn. don't worry that guy already fit into that or he's dead oh he's dead was paul bearer uh uh burned up

what's the word i'm looking for cremated cremated i wouldn't know i don't have the information of his burial wishes did we grill paul bearer before he went to him yeah did he marinated for a couple of days damn it's raw no but uh when this wrestling promoter is raw this is a season 10 wrestling Or no, season one. Did you bread your, Paul Bear? Did you bread it? Season 10, we demand quality. At the end of his funeral, there was like, oh, you know, I guess the Undertaker didn't show to do the eulogy.

Ulogy. And then we're forgetting all sorts of death words. Bung. The lights go out. Oh, my God. We thought he missed his father's funeral. Here he is making a grand interest. My God, it's the Undertaker to deliver the eulogy.

Oh, no. Cate choked slammed him into Paul Bear's Casket. This is ridiculous. Oh, the disrespect. Mommy, why is there a fog machine in Daddy's Oh, my God? No, Paul Barrow was supposed to be the Undertaker's father? I believe so, at least for a little while.

Yeah. Yeah, that should change like the wind, man. But I think that was the case. And they were like half brothers. Yeah, Kane and him at the Undertaker. Did they like split like worms? Yeah, I think so. Cain was also several years younger than the undertaker.

And they cut him again. He said, yeah, they go to this fire. There's a fucking morbidly obese man confined to a bed. And he's like, I haven't gotten out of this bed in months. And he's farting. And we're doing all the worst imaginable fat jokes possible. Well, he, Adam Settler stops. In the middle of a fire, this is like the best fireman that ever lived.

And he's like, hey, did you start this fire by lightning you fought? And I'm like, yo, dude, like, you're in trouble here. And he's a firefighter with Bedside Manor is what he's telling you. When Kevin James first sees him, he's like, holy Shammu, that's the name of a whale. And we're just like, great. Kevin James looks at the camera. He's like, does anybody remember Shammu from SeaWorld 20 years ago? By the way, King of Queens right now, check your Tuesdays.

Is it playing right now? No, no. I mean, it was. That's where he came from. No, yeah, I know. I'm saying I've never seen it. It's playing in perpetuity somewhere on cable. It's going to be always on.

What was the deal? He was like a UPS driver. A garbage man, I believe. No one was a UPS driver on that show? And he had a giant house and he had lobsters for dinner. Beautiful wife and a son that runs a factory. I do think he is a UPS driver, actually. Oh, you're right.

I think he is. Because every commercial I've seen for it, he's dressed in like the brown shorts and shirt. Oh, I always said he was a garbage man. I mean, I've watched a one episode. He is a garbage man, but he's not a garbage man. So they, like, pull this dude out of the fucking bed and, like, run him down the stairs. Then they fall down the stairs.

He crushes Adam Sandler and farts in his mouth. And there's a second that's like, oh, no, is he dead? And he's like, hi, do, do you know, he's alive. Well, no, he gives a thumbs up and then he farts and then he gives a thumbs down. Right, right, right, right. And then Kevin James goes, oh, no, broccoli. And it's like, well, you're making all these fat jokes.

Now you're saying he's eating broccoli? He's putting, like, he puts, like, he puts, the oxygen mask on his face all the while this building is burning down around them and make the comments outside you can have all the jokes you want once you save this dude's life and you're worried about your own fucking

children well oh he died as you lived making fun of people I think they're driving him out of this fire and a forklift this is just too much and not only that you thought that was bad enough the fat guy riding the forklift happy as a clam going take me to a deli

well he's like hero hero he's my hero by the way i want a hero yeah yeah with kelly good god and it's it's the adam sandler thing right it's like a i made fun of this guy and now b he has to make fun of him fucking self because he knows he's also irredeemable yeah because no because he realizes that adam sandler is the coolest person on earth and he wants to be the coolest person on earth now so he has to do it can we talk about his apartment i know we're jumping around because he's trash his apartment, I don't know, like Eric just talked about lobsters for dinner. I don't even know what this place is. It's a palace. Kevin James is? No, no. Adam. Adam. Both of them humongous estates. But at least Kevin James is trying to look, trying to look working classish. It's like a split level, you know,

sure. But he has a house. Yeah, sure. It's a house. Because he probably lives in like the ass end of Brooklyn situation. You never get like where they actually live. But Sandler looks like he lives in like park slope or something. He's this nice basement apartment. It's gorgeous. There's like arcade games, neon lights. It's the thing where he's a single guy. He doesn't have to worry about kids. And all he worries about his fucking watching pornography and masturbating. Right.

You know he's a single guy because he's got pornography hanging up in his apartment. Like these pin-up posters and stuff. Yeah, like he's fucking 12 and it's a clubhouse. That's the thing. Sandler is always a little pervy in these movies. This is like really, this guy is fucking wrong in the head. It's weird. Like there's one part where he's talking to Kevin James.

He's like, yeah, no, man, I'm a fucking whore. I'm a whore. Yeah. I'm just like, what? My dick's falling off. I don't even know why. I mean, I feel like when you're a single gentleman, the day that you hang up pornography in your house is a sad day.

It's a turning point. It is. I don't know in which direction, but it's a turning point. Because it's not, it's art. It's pervy art. It's like painted women with big breasts. Keep telling yourself that, Lewis Carroll. And then he gets himself, he has a subscription to several magazines.

He gets DVD megapacks. Sent to his house. It's like the Columbia House for Porn, which I imagine must have existed. I never heard of it, but probably, right? I can speak to. Oh, here we go. Oh, noted pornography expert. No, did Columbia House expert?

And no. You want the Columbia House porno pack. You get big butts. Big butts, too. Look at those yams. That's one in sepia. Broken butts. You know what that's about?

The best of the Great Depression. That's more sepia. Tall guy, short girl. Tall girl, short guy. The Grand Canyon. Clothed female, nude male Office settings Bare ankle

Feet Subfeet Some cleavage Medical scenarios Waiting in line at the bank TV VCR repair Western Well that was the cable guy

Yeah, yeah Westerns Gothic horror Action adventure Magic dog playing sports Not involved in pornographic activity He's playing sports in the next room

Magic bullet Oh no It's not about the JFK assassinations It's a sexy version of that infomercial About the blender An angel helped him And then he fucked it that's a that's a good to be angel up my ass it's a good yeah oh yeah angel up my ass too though

they really went in a different way always comes out around this time of year I like you up my ass and angel up my ass too took the same sort of a thematic crossroads as chud and chud too but i like the fourth one the best because that's when he gets his wings on his face right put your wings on my face so he uh pornography tangent on their next fire again Adam said those fucking around at a fire it's after the fire

they have to go they're doing a sweep to make sure everything's okay he finds a rat and he's like hey Kevin James eat this rat for a thousand bucks and they're like having some

bad back and forth here's the thing if this like so like the little structure that Sandler's on kind of collapses and he falls and it's an accident

had that not happened I kind of feel like Kevin James is eating that rat yeah I'm curious about it. I think everything would have went according to plan. Like this bet would have gone down. He would have eaten it.

What did he say? Like ass first. He's like for a thousand dollars, I'll eat it ass first or whatever. And then he'd get that thousand dollars. I'd watch that movie. And then like he gets sick. And he doesn't know what's happening to him. Oh yeah, because the rat had like something like the bubonic play.

And now he really needed those medical benefits. Yes. Now he has to get married while being. sick in like an FDR wheelchair puke it out his guts the entire time. I kind of wish it was like Werner Herzog eats a shoe where he has to have a press conference and he just brings it up and he's like

Adam Sandler made me do this. Yeah, you got do it on stage. Forking knife it in front of the media. So Kevin James kind of saves him his life. We wake up in a doctor's office or in a hospital and this very sexy doctor. Oh yeah. Which Adam Sandler and this Brooklyn accent he's doing

really sucks. It's a really like hey honey. And she's like I'm a doctor. He's like, Dr. Honey. And I'm like, oh. Oh, shudder. Oh, shudder. It's so annoying because, like, he's from here. Yeah, exactly. So do it. It's just so broad. Like, you know what I mean? Like, it's not the accent that he's doing in, like, Uncle Jems, which is like, you know what I mean? Like a New Yorkie kind of accent. Yeah. But it's kind of lived in. It's because it's more tough guy than really New Yorkie. Yeah, I guess that's true. Kevin James is trying one on for size also. That's right. Tough guy works with the ladies. You want to. threaten them right out of the gate. Yes. And demean them. Do you mean their Yeah, that's a big deal. Yeah. You're a doctor, though. You're Dr. Honey. And then she's like and of course she fucks them later. And it drives

to be nuts that she fucks him later. Not only fucks him, but fucks him in an orgy. Yes. A big time orgy. That also involves tequila. So hey, everybody, take you pills afterwards. Yeah. She's one of the one of the girls there. Now, the thing is though, not only is he saying like Dr. Honey,

whatever, so he's sharing the hotel, the hospital room. Yeah. with Kevin James, they're both laid up. And all the other firefighters are there visiting. And like Kevin James' kids are there. And he's like sexually harassing this woman in front of all of them. And then all the firefighters are like, bah.

Yeah, why don't you get out of here? Thanks for monitoring our friend's lives. So this woman gets fucking humiliated. Enjoy a nine-year degree. And this is when the kids are like, oh, you know, this is the hospital where mom died, Kevin James, you know, we don't know what we do without you. So then that sets

off all the thoughts. And Adam Sandler does specifically say, like, I would do, oh, you save my life, bro. I owe you one. Whatever you want, I'll do it. Right. Except for being gay. I'm not doing that. So he goes to his house and he's like, look, I just, he's despondent. He looks in the newspaper. He sees something about domestic partnerships,

light bulb. He sees this. He's looking at the paper while he's eating cake frosting as if it's ice cream, which I guess is the How could I be worse to gay people? Maybe if I've kind of defraud them and just use their whole movement for my benefit. As Death Becomes Her teaches us,

the last string before full psychopathy is eating fucking frosting out of a fucking jar like that. That's right. Yeah, that's right. I guess it gives you brainworms kind of. Like, it's just too much sugar. He's doing it by himself in the dark when his kids are asleep. Yeah. That's the time when you eat frosting

out of the canister, Chris Cabin. Just become an alcoholic, like a normal person. Or like just order a pizza and eat it yourself. Look, look, that's where you are in life. That's cool too. Sure. I've been there. Been there.

So he goes to Adam Sandler's Palace. Adam says like, oh, it's 4 o'clock of the morning. And he's like, look, this is the idea that I have. And yes, tealotilla is involved. It's a whole like, I don't know. It's a bunch of Hooters girls get him up at the fucking. And this is another, it's such a played fucking thing that, like, The women that work at Hooters are fucking prostitutes.

Like, I cannot, like, that fucking joke has lasted so long, like, since probably the advent of Hooters. And clearly they were okay with it because all their corporate logos are throughout this movie. So it's like, hey, that's an advertisement to everyone. Come here and demean people. Go grab their ass. They like it. Hooters.

No, don't do that. But it's okay. Which is a reminder to see Andrew Boyleski's support the girls. Great movie. Great movie. Yeah, so he explains the whole thing And then this is the first Of several times in this movie

The F. Gay Slur is being used And that's weird I literally lost count On the F gay slur for a movie in 2007 But it's one thing If you're doing the bullshit South Park Which is wrong Which is like annoying person is the F gay slur

Like you know what I mean? It's dumb Yeah, it's dumb It's just as bad It is just as bad. It is on there, but, like, I think it is, it is somewhat worse. And if that character learns throughout the movie, like, oh, you can't say that word in that way because that's how you do it. It's just not an appropriate word.

If you told me there was, like, a 2003 episode of South Park that was, like, Holocaust denial is actually okay. Everyone that's calmed down. I would believe you. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Being too hot on one side or another, Eric, is bad. Maybe the middle is where we should be. Interesting.

I don't know, man. That show's been on the air for like a really long time. That episode could exist. It might. But like it's, that's one thing. And I'm not condoning that at all. I'm just saying that's one thing. But to refer to a person that is gay as that, it's, that's a hard path to, to toe for a character to be redeemable.

Because it's not attached to a character. Yes. Like it's just, it's like the whole gays are the. Everybody. It's like a Pollock painting. It's a splattering all over. this fucking movie. Well, because the thing is like you don't need, like

the script or the story is not furthered by him saying this. Exactly. And it's not like we wouldn't know what kind of guys these are. Like, these guys aren't Westboro Baptist Church fucking huge out homophobes. They're just fucking, your regular run of the mill

working class homopholes. Sure. But like, so what, I guess the point I'm trying to make is like, you'd still get who they are without Sandler having to have these lines. Well, that's the thing is it's it's actually a joke. Yeah, that is. You're trying to get a joke at it. Yeah, exactly. Because you already know who they are

because Sandler has already been fucking making fun of Kevin James kid. Yeah. Doing the splits and the tap dancing. God forbid, right? He's, it's, it's, again, it's one thing to be like, I think your son might be gay. It's another thing that's like, hey, your son's gonna, your son could learn baton swallowing.

I'm like, are you talking about my 11-year-old kid giving oral sex to an adult right? You lost weight his dick would look like and he follows that up with AI Balax lollipops

up his ass too and I'm like what are you It's the same fucking line penetration on this child and it's like dude you know what dude I know we're all having fun you like busting balls

in the firehouse Kevin James has to stop be like you know what man I'm putting on my non-firefighter voice right now that's fucked up stop saying shit about my When's your daughter gonna fuck too? How about that? How about some of that?

How's your daughter doing? When's she gonna get tits, bro? I guess that's the heart of the movies that Kevin James has no self-respect and maybe he was a better man when his partner was alive but I don't know anything about that. I don't either. I don't think there's any point

to this other than me. You don't know about that lady at all. She appears to have like died of cancer or something. Yes. But he's just a complete pushover for Adam Sandler until he gets the one, thing of like, ha ha, we we spit, shook a hand. They didn't actually do that, but it's like

this weird arbitrary thing. It's like, you owe me so we're getting married? Yes. And that's the thing to get a domestic partnership. He's like, don't worry about it. You don't even need to move in. We just change, we forward your mail. And he's like, all right, if that's it forget about it. I'm not going to, I'll break the law. It's like, I'm not going to

look up what the penalties are, what the actual statute is before I do this crazy thing. Well, he owes him. He owes him. So they go to town hall in like in like they're dressed up and like they're wearing like Sandler's got this fucking wig on and sunglasses

it's all a bit much because that's how they get married folks rim shot so Sandler though does have to move in because the very next thing here is the fucking massive pornography delivery yes boxes

of pornography and here's the question about this. Because it's literally, it's boxes of pornography, it's boxes of condoms. We have, it's this mass fucking, like, Trojan box comes in. No, it's not Trotian box. Oh, are they Magnums? They're Magnum X-L, because that

dick is in one. You know he's got a huge dick, Adam Sandler. I mean, absolutely. Who's producing this movie? Oh, Adam's movie. It's like a can of crushed tomatoes. But my question is, is this like the all the time? Is this like the regular round-the-clock

pornography delivery? Or is he like well fuck I got to stay in Kevin James house with him and these two kids I might not be able to get all the ladies to come over but I need something to fucking jerk this dick so I better get some pornography I think this is a weekly supply

got it because he's got he's the big thing to make a point is like what it's just all you have to do is change your fucking address your mailing address and that's what getting married a domestic partnership is right yeah I mean it's it's shame levels of pornography this like you

you specifically went to a website that's like, yeah, we're going to put what it is all over. All these do, like, here's a nice little box. Nobody will know anything. That's a great point, Chris Cabin. All of these places come with discretionary shipping. What fucking loose black market shit are you buying from? I feel like it's got like the fucking poster on the cover.

There's a check box at the bottom where it's like discretionary shipping? Yes or no? And he went, absolutely not. Is this a gift? Yes or no. It's like we can bill your credit card as. entertainment incorporated or ass bangers incorporated like ass bangers please because he's got so many pornography orders he's got to be able to keep track of what they actually were not only that

if you ever calls the bank and gets a female receptionist she wants to point out all those charges he wants to have the box outside the apartment in case you know misses whatever's mrs la rousseau's bringing home a grocery yeah dude suddenly she spots that and he's like okay this guy this guy's got a functioning hog therefore i'm going to have to have have sex with him, and that's what life is now. Well, pornography does attract mates. That's one thing we absolutely know. Of course, yes. Well, that's the

weird thing is he's a sex addict and a porn addict. I don't understand, like, when you would have time to do both? Like, I don't know. Like, that's the big question. If you're always having all these ladies over, when are you looking through all this pornography? I mean, I guess in the one time, like, all of your black book is totally booked up. You got to

just in case. I think he's like he's a being that perceives time differently. I think it's like it's stretched out longer. So he's one of those rare people that's watching the porno all the way through. Dormammu, I came to bargain. Stop watching pornography, Dormammu.

Oh, fine. Yeah, Dormammu's has got like a beat off blister so he dissipates. Welcome Dr. Strange to the porn dimension. Oh, well, we're not going to sit and watch the credits? A bunch of people fucking worked on this pornography. You don't

I don't want to see you. Watch the credits with me. I watched 4.5 million different scenarios, and in everyone, it ends with Dormammu jerking off to pornography. Nothing will save you. So he moves in. They get back on the firefighting thing. There's a weird thing where Adam Sandler assaults this kid with a fucking fire extinguisher. Because they're like badasses and they go to like a grocery store and they're like, oh, I found the cause of the, the blaze. Someone was rolling a doobie.

He is an old-style dubie, which I don't understand. I don't know what that means. Yeah. But yes. And then some stoner kids like, hey, that's mine. Can I have it back, man? And he just starts, like, hosing this kid with a fire extinguisher. Because being a firefighter in New York City's fun.

It's all about jokes. It's about jokes. It's mostly jokes. It's about pornography. It's about hanging with your dudes. It's about saying derogatory slurs. It's about gay bashing your friends, children. Okay, that is what it's about.

On the reg. On the reg. In front of them, he goes to their house and the kid's like, hey, dad, I'm really excited to do Pippin. And then he's like, oh, this freaking little homo or whatever. And the kid's like, I'm right here. And he's like, good. And he's like, hey, could you get your pornography out of my son's face?

No, it'll be good for him. This is like getting real weird. Yeah, here's 11-year-old kid. Just look at this pornography, see if it does anything for you. And, of course, the, quote, joke is the kid, like, opens the magazine and screams in a high-pitched voice and runs away. I did the same thing when I saw this scene. Yeah. I thought you got to say, what the first time he saw pornography.

I would be like, hey, man, cool. We're fake married for benefits. You can't be alone around that kid. I don't like anything that I've seen. I don't like what you've been saying when we were on the job. I didn't fucking forget that shit about baton swallowing. And that's the thing is, like, I'm trying to get benefits in the... the eventuality that I die on the job and my kids are left with nothing, but I'm willing to

endanger them every day during this period of time. Physical and psychological harm. Also, what's the end game here? Like, you're going to be married forever. There's never the point where like, hey, so how long does this go on for? Exactly. The idea is like there's an inspection period of six months or something. Right.

But then you're legally married forever? I guess the move is maybe like until he finds a lady friend that he's going to. going to remarry. I guess. And then they can dissolve it. Because the whole thing is that's his fear is he's not going to find a woman in time and something might happen to him. He's got to watch about that, though, because Chuck is going to end the divorce.

He's going to take it for everything. Oh, absolutely. Half of everything at least. Doobo do dabba. I'm going to finally move out of this basement apartment. I'm going to take your house. Boobo de dubudee. Bupu da-duba.

You're homeless now. So when they move in They run a foul of Steve Buscemi Who's kind of the antagonist The first guy Oh right I think it's the dude from Matt Was he on Mad TV this guy?

He's shown up in a bunch of comedies and stuff Maybe maybe not a mad TV cast member But he's been a lot of comedies And he's like Just there to be like Hey how's it going Just looking to see how you live And their whole

This is like a 10 minute scene And it's just them going like Yeah we got a lot of gay sex in this house. We have so much gay sex inspector person. Don't worry about it. Right, because everyone who's gay is a pervert and has to talk about it all the time.

And also it's just hilarious to imagine. Could you even the whole premise of this movie, the joke is could you imagine Adam Sandler even pretending to be gay? That's it. That is the knee strap. Let's stretch that for an hour and 55 fucking

minute. Dude, I almost fell off the couch when I saw this runtime. I could not believe those numbers staring back at me. I think that's the amount of time we get, we have to wait until the death star is blown up. It's fucking crazy. This was one of those situations where it's like five minutes less than Star Wars. I absolutely was doing the thing where I didn't want to pause it because I didn't want to know how much was left. Yep. It's just one of those things. I went to the bathroom doing this and it was great. Oh, just left a plane. Wait, oh, with myself. No, you left the movie on. Yeah, I left the movie on. I don't even know when and when.

don't jerk off. Oh, it's constantly because of a straight male. That's right. He's a straight, regular guy. That's just how I am. So this dude... Biggest dick on the planet. So this dude is like, you know, here's one way you could get them off your back, you know?

You could get, like, you could go to Canada and get legally married. Well, no, you're getting mixed up. Does Beal offer that suggestion? He's like, you guys should get a lawyer. That's right. And then they're like, well, we got to get a lawyer. Which again, who's paying for this? They go to Jessica Beale's insane office.

This is like fucking Al Pacino and the devil's advocate this office. This is an office that does not exist for this lawyer in New York. Exactly. It's a public advocate of some kind, obviously, or whatever. Well, because that's the biggest question for me

and like the timeline of this movie. I don't know when she actually has to kick into high gear that she's representing them in some kind of case situation. Yes. I don't remember when that comes up. She's just like offering them some advice and then it's like hey

if they come after you but like she's in the rest of the movie before like the case has to happen so it's like are you building something here are you actually working or are you just hanging out with Adam Sandler the whole time I think they become friends

she's so charmed by them and so she shows up and she's like yeah and she is like an advocate for the gay community and like especially for domestic partnership she's done a lot of these things and like she knows all the ins and out You know, it'll be a lot easier. They'll give you a little less scrutiny

if you guys actually go to Canada and get married, which, and they're like, well, okay, Bobbidi-Boo-Boo-Boo-Boo-Boo-Daboo. And in between those Bobbidi-Boo-Bee-Bee-Badis and the shoobitidi-de-bidis. Right. They had him say, even as in the line, to try to convince her of his sexuality with Kevin James as,

yeah, we're our big-time fruits. Yep, yep. Which is another thing you shouldn't say. It's just, all of it. It's all of it. And I'm like, when are these guys going to learn a lesson? Like, I know at the end, it's all, we're going to tack on something where somebody learns a lesson.

They do that at the end, that they're like, oh, yeah, we learned that gay people are human and we shouldn't say that stuff. So forget the part where we've made fun of it for 90 minutes. There's no scene. Just give me one scene where, like, he regrets that he did it. But like he goes from, like, throwing F bombs everywhere to the end. Somebody says an F bomb, and he freaks out. Yes.

And you're like, when, when did it happen? He does punch Rob Cordy in the face at one point for calling him that. Well, also, this happens right now because they go to Canada. They're in a cab. Run being driven by Dennis Dugan, director of the film. Yep, nice. Nice cameo. Who also says an F-bombs.

So all the principal characters and the director say the F-Bomb on screen in the film. Adam, I hope you don't mind. I wrote a scene for myself. Dooganators tagging in, Sandman. And I had some things to say, you know, and none of people are saying. so I'm gonna I'm gonna I'm gonna I'm gonna be in this scene with you okay Adam thanks it is it is there's so many Spade will have to play somebody else I don't care who spade plays I'm in this one Adam he says a few other words derogatory he calls him queers first and then he escalates the F word yes because this is and what happens here is

kind of insane because they're in like a moving car yes and Sandler starts strangling this guy and the car is like driving all over the road and then like I guess it's just happenstance then they pull they like the car crash lands in a parking lot for one of these chapels and man it's just it's just blind luck it's rob schneider serendipity but like it's it's it's it's like adam sandler is offended as a straight man to be called that yeah that's where the anger is coming from it's not strangulation it's not you shouldn't use that word exactly call me that exactly i'll call somebody else now i'll call my best friend's kid that that's my word that i say to other people that lollipop that lollipop remark is for my loved ones only

but this scene is like an encapsulation of this whole movie because it's Adam Sandler when we first see them in Niagara Falls right? Yeah, it's Niagara Falls right? And like they're looking at like it's till death do us part and he's like till death dick us part. Yes, oh that's right. What? There's a Beavis and Butthead joke?

No, there's a couple of... So his dick is so big it's going to split him apart. Oh, no, it's like every time they're like, Oh, which one should we get married at? Is it like forever and ever, which is for gay endeavor? Like they're just doing, they're making like, Oh, is that what they're saying in the car? Yes.

Oh, okay. And he's just laughing to himself naming all putting dicks and balls in every one of these fucking titles. And again, your stepdad is laughing in the audience. That's all that matters. It is nothing but it's wall-to-wall stepdad. Get him. You get him. all right you're not allowed in

you have a biological child no but I also got another one from another marriage are you coming come on in come on sir this are the only dads that can take kids

to have in Stanley movies is stepdad is that a beer in your hand good are you are you deficient in your housework absolutely come on in have you raised your hand

but never followed through do you smoke at the kitchen table what's the whiskey in the toilet table? situation. How many hungry man's a week? There's also

Alexander Payne wrote this movie question. He's a co-writer on it. He said that he said that they took all of his

stuff out and added all the sandwich so the only thing he wrote was like and his wife died there's a long death see and they have nice houses

original title about gay Schmidt so they get married anyone the dude who's in not major league what's this guy's name that plays the bum bum oh I have no idea who this

witness at the wedding yes they have to get a witness and like it's um oh no it's it's not Brian Doyle Murray no it's no but that's who I thought it was Randy Quaid he's in Canada he's crazy and he's oh he's the crazy hillbilly from Waterboy yeah oh fuck I forget his name

oh this guy Blake Clark yeah he's in what he's in a lot of Sandler movies I think he's a Nightmare too is the gym teacher? Yes. Yes. That is this guy. I do believe you are correct. But yeah, he's in, oh, he's in toys. Yeah, he's definitely the water boy. Fifty first dates. Yeah, Blake Clark is this guy's name. He's good. I like this guy. He is a good actor. He's good in fucking Nightmare and Elm Street, too. And I want to confirm that that's that guy. I don't think it is actually. No, it looks just like him, doesn't it? It does. That's too bad. Damn. Damn. Damn.

I was in Wired apparently Previous episode But so yeah They have their wedding scene Wherein they will not kiss each other Oh sure So instead of a you may kiss the husband It's a fucking slap in the face

And then it's like a weird Like that's how we do that In our house First of all if you're willing to go to the lengths Of to get gay married For benefits like fucking kiss your buddy Who gives a shit? Have you not talked about any of this?

No, they're winging it, dude. What the fuck? Just say, okay, we're going to get there. They're going to say kiss. We're going to have to kiss. It'll be what it is. It'll be really easy. Maybe it'll be awkward. Man, the prism, prison as well of sexuality. Prison prison. The perspective of sexuality in this movie is fucking crazy. Because we're all on a spectrum, obviously.

Sure. Well, that's the weirdest part too, because later in the movie it keeps coming up like, oh my God, it's coming to light that Adam Siddler had sex with this woman and that woman. Like, just say you're bisexual and be done with it. That word wasn't allowed. It doesn't exist in this world. I was thinking about that. It does not exist in the world. 2007, not allowed.

It's just crazy. Like, women can be bisexual, men can't be. It's just crazy that that's not invented in this movie yet. Yeah, no, not allowed to do it. It does not exist. Oh, I wasn't gay yet, but I became gay. Because it's only in, like, the different kinds of sexuality you see in this movie are ones that Adam Sandler has seen in pornography.

Got it. Girl, girl? Oh, so that exists. Absolutely. And then it's like, chicks are fucking chicks, but then also a dude's involved. I saw that in a movie

so that can be in here. But that's as far as it goes. That's it as far as it goes. Yeah, that was Universal's first note on the script. We got to take that word right out of here. Take that B word out of there.

The guy, by the way, the old fellow who's the homeless guy, the thing I remembered him most from, he's the guy who was the coach in grownups. Got it. That dies and they all come back together. Marshall Bell is the guy from Nightmare 2, who's not this guy.

Oh, okay. Gotcha, got you. Anyways, so they get married. It's a funny scene. It's really funny. Yeah. Step dads across the world. Howling.

And they're all, so now they're living together. It's also weird. This, like, first night we're sleeping in a bed scene. It's weird. It's weird on so many levels. So Sandler is like, you know, I'm not going to sleep on this piece of shit chair you made up for me. I'm sleeping in bed with you. Also, you don't have to actually sleep at the same room.

Like, I know, like, you're afraid of getting inspected or whatever, but like, it's taking pictures through the windows, though. That's a question back here. How fucking long is this going to go on? Exactly. Do you have another room when this has to go off? Also, it is possible to sleep in bed with another man without masturbating or having sex or throwing in a sex doll. No, no, no, no. We were not in 2007.

But, like, you could just be mature adults. I guess you wouldn't have gotten fake gay married if you were mature adults. But so it's like this overnight sequence of Adam Sandler being like, why don't you got Cinemax? Yeah, that's the start of it. Why don't you, do you have Cinemax on that TV in here? Because that's my masturbation channel.

I got to jerk off. That's exactly what the starts with. In bed with you. I would be like, listen, man. Take your magazine to the fucking bathroom. Thank you. You know, all that pornography delivered. Yeah, you don't have a DVD playing the house.

I need to jerk off before bed I need to fall asleep in some sort of euphoric state the only way I can get there I cannot believe with a house I can't sleep without it Kevin James does not have a finished basement

that Adam Sandler could be going down and you don't necessarily have to sleep there but at least when you need to fucking watch all this pornography a porn dungeon those boxes had to go somewhere so somewhere in this house just because of all the boxes, the quantity alone, it's a porn dungeon. And you've got a nice bolt on it to keep the kids out.

Sure, sure. Nice leather chair in there. First, there's a lot of business about making fun of his dead wife also. Oh, my God, doing a fucking impression of his dead wife. Dead wife's ghost. Yes, who you would have fucking known. You were the best man at their wedding. He was probably there at the funeral.

And he said, oh, no, I'm dead. It's so scary being dead. I can't believe you didn't throw out any of my clothes. You're so weird. And it's like, I would be like, dude, you get out of my, honestly, I cannot get the fuck out of my house right now. Like, and if that's serious right now, making fun of my dead wife. If that wasn't bad enough, dude, you're doing my dead wife's ghost voice. Then if you ask about the cinemax, he says there's no cinemax, Sandler's responses, then what am I going to do with this?

Yeah. And Kevin James is, like, rolled over. He's not looking at him, but he knows he means his erection. His hard on. What am I going to do with this hard dick if I can't jerk off in your bed, Kevin Jay? I'm glad you got a hard dick doing an impression of my dead wife. It actually sounds kind of like the Joker's impression of his mother. Oh, right, yeah.

Someday I'll see that movie. Yeah, you're fine. I mean, like, you really, I don't put it past fucking Chuck to wake up, wake the sun up, be like, oh, you're too sad about my dick to get up to go to school. Why don't you get up, you lazy prick? Oh, he's just bebop it and scatting over dead mom. So it escalates from pornography and all that shit to like they wake up in the morning. This is insane.

This woman, Teresa, who's I guess like a cleaning woman for Kevin Jones or because I guess he can afford that. Must be nice. Yeah, must be. Can firefighters be on the take? That's what they have to be. Whatever's going on said. What are you getting money from? They're setting fires, dude.

Oh, I see. Yeah, yeah. It was a doobie. Doobie lit the fire. Wasn't a man. Captain, got another doobie over here. The doobie burner. Yeah, it's what dovie? And then they've got like six bags of coke that they found. And yeah, we burned up those bodies. There's no dental records. We punched out their teeth. He's purposely taking the fire truck on a wrong turn when they're going to a case. Oh, now we're going to be late. All the building burned down. Giuseppe's Tritoria. It was a doby. There's a doobie that lit up the whole thing A Gino's Gentleman's Club Yes that was also a doobie that lit that out So this dude Kevin James' children wake them up in the morning And there's an unruly Eastern European woman In the bed as well

Because Adam Sandler's sexual lust Cause knows no bounds That I guess in the middle of the night We're led to believe that he Found the phone number or something Or found where she was there But she doesn't She's not like a live in

She doesn't live there But she was there right before they went to bed. Which is also weird. Yeah, she was watching TV and he's like, I can smell your foot. Oh, God, I got a jerk off now. So I guess, here we go. He snuck out late at night and this woman was just watching television.

And then he seduced her with his hog. Didn't take long, dude. He's the hero of the film, Adam Sand. Brought her into bed. To be fair. Yeah. His dick cannot fit in the house. No, it's true.

It's too big. So I think they had to go outside to do it And then came back inside sleep He needs like a portal Just to store his dick Like another world portal He needs a Dr. Strange Does the whole thing down there

Your hog exists in the mirror world right there You know this isn't what I got into studying the magics for Dormamo you gotta take my balls Oh you mean he stole the ancient pornography That was locked up behind chain and key You know Chuck's dick is in Thailand right now he wishes the necklace is just a picture

of Jenna Jameson with like a green light over it fuck this movie man so so the joke is that he fuck this woman in the bed next to Kevin James and Kevin James is like Kevin James got involved too smell your thumb smell your fucking thumb dude

I was fucking your thumb last night he smells the thumb and it smells like plastic there's a blow up doll on the other end of the room Lord knows what this sexual excapade was How many sleeping pills did he have last night? That's a great question because he is out like a light dude. It's like he ate three turkeys with all the gravy. I think that's my version of porno now.

As I get older, I'm just like three fucking turkeys. Dude, I'm going to tell you. There's this like shitty rent fare that happens in our neighborhood. We'll go every year to check it out. It's like a one day affair. Dude, I get really excited to get that turkey. Oh, the big old turkey later. Just walking around.

Last time we went actually, a Japanese tourist group came up. asked to take my picture with a big fat American with a turkey leg in his mouth like Fred Flintstone tell me you refused no I happily agreed so somewhere

back in Japan there's a family that just has a shrine to you then we went to this park and there was this fat guy eating a turkey leg and we took his picture and this is America

in a nutshell I love that oh yeah the sex style joke the thing I was going to say do you notice when they cut to the sex style there's a really bad sound effect right here it's like

there's a honking sound yeah it might as well be that's the sound of your balls draining into a fucking sex doll so they find Steve Bouchemy going through the garbage and he's like oh interesting I'm in this movie and like oh man

Jessica Biel has warned them if a short weird looking guy and a do-eyed teenager and another scientist come looking for you Clint Fitzer and he's like oh it looks interesting that I noticed you have all these garbage of these boxes like

Chuck just moved in but didn't he move in a while ago? Also your garbage is a very gay at all. This is not very homosexual garbage. You can just say we waited until marriage to fully move in. Like you could walk your way around it but instead they're like oh fuck. Well because Kevin James is a fucking stupid

caveman in this movie. And also be like my garbage is gay, tell me what gay garbage is asshole. Fucking take me to court right now. That's something fucking gay garbage is you piece of shade. You were able to lay into fucking homophobe Dennis Dugan cab driver character. Yeah, sure. A few scenes back. Start laying into Bouchemy. That's your move is to be defensive in this scenario. Garbage

isn't stereotypical. It's just so fucking ridiculous. So the answer is they go to Dwayne Reed and like, well, we got to gay up this garbage. Oh yeah, we'll buy some share tapes and throw it in the trash because apparently that's gays to throw shit away. What is the budget for this scam? Like, you're just buying all this stuff to throw it in the trash?

There's a DVD of Brokeback Mountain, blah, blah, blah. All the most obvious fucking jokes. So he runs into, in this store, he runs into Jessica Beale, who's dressed for, I don't even know what. It's like, it's like a push-up fucking, it's like a push-up vest she's wearing. It's insane.

I think Jessica Beal's character might be from the future. Okay, all right. Oh, really? He's dressed as like a Jetson. This outfit that you're describing is a bit Jetson-esque. And so he's like, oh, cool.

Oh, hey, yeah, we're just, we're gay guys again. And she's like, oh, that's so great. I love gay guys. Hey, there's a big gay ball tomorrow. Why don't you come? You're my friend. And he's like, I get the hang out with you. I better do it.

Oh, by the way, here's K-Y's jelly. Oh, yeah. God. I just want to shoot myself in the fucking head. So we get to the, it's a cost. Doom Ball. By the way, this is a Halloween movie. I didn't. I had no idea. I had no idea either. She refers to it as a fundraiser. I'm having a fundraiser. He's, uh, Kevin James dressed like a big apple and, um, Adam Sandler is dressed like a, hold on I have to pull this. Uh, Count Dracula. He's as a Count Dracula. Did you notice though with Sandler in this Dracula makeup? He looks much younger. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. It was very weird because like the hair that he has on to this. He looks like young

Adam Sam. He's also a much more convincing Dracula than the one in the Monsters Quad. He absolutely is, dude, because there is a shot where he does the Bella puts his like cape up to his face. And I was like, not too bad Dracula. This should have been the look

for Little Nicky instead of that. Maybe they'll make a live action hotel Transylvania, a fourth of which is in production right now. Interesting you should say because there's IMDB trivia and this, I just want to read this because I want everyone to know the commas are really important. I'm going to read this as it's written.

Commas, you're saying, the punctuation mark. Yes. Is the, this, can I just ask, is it, uh, Adam Sandler is a Dracula in this movie? He was also voicing a Dracula in Hotel Transylvania. During the Halloween scene, Chuck dresses up as a vampire. During the Halloween scene, Chuck dresses up as a vampire.

Years later, Adam Sandler would star in Hotel Transylvania film series as a Dracula, who is a vampire. Like, no commas, no periods, no semicolins. That's what we're doing. DB, you fucks. By the way, this is the, now I've learned Adam Sandler's in Hotel Transylvanians. It's his thing. I didn't know. Yeah, he's the guy. I never saw those things fucking print money too. They all print money. I've never seen a second of

them. I'm not, I'm not fucking with minions either. Good for you. You know, I saw that minion movie and I thought it was pretty okay. Wow. I liked it more than the despicable me, which was the only one I saw. Because the minions are essentially just loony, like doing Looney Tunes gag. It was a total like absurdist comedy. I think that Minions movie is underrated. We love minions? I don't love it, but I had a fun time watching it being super stoned.

I'm just saying it's not at WHM. It's not... Oh, I mean, it's not an episode. Do you want a backpack t-shirt car? Can you just look like a crazy person? That's why Andrew on the group chat is always sending Minion means.

Right, dude, this is embarrassing. Did anyone watch Mortal Engines? No, I did. Yeah, there is, in that movie. Did Pete Dog direct that? man or did he just produce that? Peter Jackson did not direct it. But he did have something to do with it though. He was going

to for a while, he was going to direct it and then he kicked it off. The story of that guy's life, he was going to direct something. It's about cars that eat cities. What the fuck? It's about cities that are cars that eat other city cars. Man, that's dumb. It's in the future. And you would think

that the plot of the movie would generally revolve around that premise, but they abandon it. Which is fucking crazy. Wait, what? So we're just like hanging out in that universe and it's just like yeah of course obviously we're in a city car called london that's going to go kill other cities whatever by the way there's this guy coming to chase us for this reason or whatever that they abandon the whole premise but why i bring it up is there's a brief moment in the film where it's like because now like these european cities have dominated the

world and now they're in america because america's i guess trash which is not wrong sure to the point which they unveil the ancient statue of American deities which are minions and that's the joke are you kidding me? I'm not it's in the movie. I don't know that sums up this country pretty well. Yeah not bad

that might be the only thing left. Mindless gibbering butt cheeks hanging out. That movie should have ended with a city car called Walmart runs over London. The biggest one of us exactly they wind up oh this is the David Space

cameo is here. Yes, he's looking for Jessica Beal and he sees someone in a Playboy Bunny outfit with a nice ass and it's like bouncing around and doing stuff. According to the Tribune, this is indeed Jessica Beal. But the gag is it's very clearly a woman.

It was a nice ass and did you know in this other movie that was a nice ass? Trivia. Nice asses are a theme in Sandler movies. Oh yeah, I love the themes. It's like, oh, director's trademark nice asses. director's trademark full frontal nudity saying the F word

But no And then like He's like Oh hey man I can't wait to suck on He says something He says something Yeah

I don't remember what it was David Spade turns around Right And it's just David Spade and drag Being like Oh yeah Exactly Hey big boy

It's like that kind of That level of I'm a gay guy I want to have sex With other men Ooboo Boo Boo Boooooooooooooooooooooo that's that's all the research anyone did it's just insane that that's what's going on in this movie but it is and that's like the joke like again people are fucking losing their mind for in the audience of the year 2000 or fucking seven were people losing their minds for this movie it made it did pretty well yeah it was so past the time i remember when this came out and i was like this looks so fucking wrongheaded um nick's words i mean it was critically penned enormously. Except for

fucking hope so. If you could imagine it. Armand Dwight loved it. I'm sure he did. He called it a modern classic. Dude, that guy that guy sucks. That guy, he's got a racket. You know, you gave that dude a bone and he's holding on to it. He's been doing it for fucking years

now. I know, and I've hated him the whole time. It's just dumb. But he's pretty irrelevant now that the internet exists, or the Twitter is all over. It's all anyone ever does. Like, you know that movie's what the fuck's pretty great publication armandwhite.com now no he writes for some conservative right these days oh wait it might be national review yes he does he writes for national review wow so he's fucking right at home with those fucking pricks right at home um so uh they're hanging out

jessica beale's brother is nick wardson yeah i'm sorry you get the number it's a big fucking number i had to look up the old uh worldwide gross here um oh it's gross it grossed out the entire world 186 million dollars for the worldwide worldwide domestic the domestic beat the international domestic 121 plus million dollars yeah yeah that sucks

yeah that sucks it is indeed a lot of money that's 64% of its fucking box office gross is America so she her brother is Nick Swartson it's only kind of important for the later in the movie and he's just like he's doing his Nick Swordson thing

if you can stomach it I couldn't even stomach it during that Barks Roop Beer commercial 20 years ago yeah it's a tall order so and they're like doing to dance off and all this stuff and they they can't dance because they're straight guys how can you

not dance to groove is in the heart I refuse to fucking hear it everybody knows how to no first of all a cinder block would fucking tango when it hurt first of all I think you have the rest of us at a bit of a disadvantage

because folks at home listening Chris Cabin is an excellent dance. He is a great dance. So it's very easy for you to say how can you not dance to X. But you are right because here's the thing they don't even try to fucking fake it. Yeah, the move is you just put your arms

in the air and you start moving around. Well, because straight guys cannot cut loose whatsoever. But the other side of that, the other side of that, though, is they're like, oh man, a dance off, every gay person is great at dancing. Come on. Also, there's a thing where Jessica Beal is like,

oh, here's my brother, Nick Swartson. This is Chuck and Larry, blah, blah, blah. They're like sitting at a table. And Nick Swartson's like, all right, I just have to ask you guys. And she's like, don't do it. And he's like, come on. No, it's fine.

We're just all hanging out. Listen, just tell me, who's pitching and who's catching. And she, as this like fucking civil rights attorney or whatever, this public defender isn't like, dude, that's fucked up. Yeah. And it's, but the whole thing with Jessica Bueh and her brother, it's, it's the rest of this movie where it's like, gay guys are hanging out together and we're all just girls. We're having a, they say later they're having a girl's day. Jessica Buell invites Adam Sandler to have a girl's day.

And I mean, she's a high-powered lawyer. She acts like a 14-year-old moron, this entire movie. And apparently she has all the time in the world. That's why I kept saying, what kind of a case is she built? She's not doing any casework. But this is, and then, you know, this is the double-edged sort of also how it portrays women, right? Oh, for sure. It's like you're either the dead woman on the pedestal or you're just a vapid idiot from my sexual desire.

Or you're fucking super desperate like the Rachel Dratch character. Absolutely. She's a fucking walk and talk and breathing Kathy cartoon. Exactly. And the way they dress, by the way, we should say Jessica Beals at a catwoman outfit and it's like, holy shit. Excuse me. the fucking Michelle Pfeiffer Catwoman just so we all get

the picture. Because it's like, hey, there's a lot of Look, listen, there's got to be a lot of gay guys in this scene and all the stepdads might leave. We don't want the stepdads to leave. Right. We need something for the stepdad for all the crags out there. The Craigs, the Jeff's, the Ted's.

How many of you stepdads would like to see Chuck and Larry go on magical adventures? That dad focus group. Well, I like the movie. a little gay for my taste. I did like the set of cans on it, Jessica Beal, though. Sure wish, though, during the Halloween ball scene,

she wasn't dressed as Santa Claus. Okay, it was a bad costume choice. We could change that. We get a good idea. We'll change that. What ideas you got for that catwoman? Okay, yeah, cat woman. The leather one.

Yeah, yep. I don't want no capes. This movie is so bad. And also, I'd like, you know, that kid to go out on Saturday night so I could take his mother out of him. a nice dinner. That's all I'm saying. Well, we can't change that. I would appreciate if your movie was a rated PG-13

so I could just drop them off and I don't have to go in with him. You know, I was on the internet the other day and I saw a picture of this tequila, tequila. Could you put her in the movie? I would like to see her in the movie. Seems like she'd be a great cameo. Yeah, and I know it hasn't happened yet, but could you say that, just put it in the movie ahead of time

that Sandy Hook didn't happen. Thank you. Dude, that lady's nuts. Oh, yeah. Tequila. Oh, is that one of her beliefs? I was just thinking about stepdad beliefs. No, Tila Tequila also has a list of absolutely insane. Right. She's now, she's an admirer of Adolf Hitler.

Yeah, it was a real deal Nazi. So she became like a stepdad? There are good stepdad. Stepdad. Yeah, no, they're definitely. Yeah, they're definitely are. But wait a second. She's a supporter of Adolf Hitler.

I mean, she might literally have brain damage because, like, the shit she's been saying and doing it. That sounds like the syphilis talking. Exactly. She had like an OD and like a brain hemorrhage. And then after that it's been like, I love Adolf Hitler. Hitler is awesome. This is like the Gary Busey motorcycle accident. Irreparable damage.

Oh yeah. We got to get these two together. Oh my God. Dude, they are both VH1 luminaries. Yeah, that's what they're alums. They're at the VH1 party. And all the planet Hollywood. Gary Bucy is doing an off-Broadway plan.

shit where in new york uh go on it's where off brother he's sarring it where he does the voice of god in like some i don't know maybe it's a romance yeah i want you to kill your firstborn son is it bible stories like gary muses bible story no but he's got a straight jacket in the post yeah it's off broadway i do the voice of god in haiti's town i'm not actually in and i just yell from the audience i get ejected every night How do I get a seat? I'd just sleep here. Yeah, yeah, it's off Broadway.

It's me on a fucking party barge in the Hudson River. I thought there's Hamilton was a ham radio. Kept on yelling. Say, breaker, breaker. We sat down just started yelling breaker, breaker, breaker. I was ejected from the theater immediately. Oh, yeah, I'm off Broadway with dear Evan Hanson. It's me just yelling at a homeless guy in the Port Authority,

calling him Evan to Anson. Look, he had a cast on his arm. I thought it was him. Do you see my one-man show where I talk to the Jack and Gleason statue outside the Port Authority for 45 minutes? Yeah, a lot of slurs in that one, too. I don't know. So they dance and it's great. And then they go outside.

Ballers' own Rob Cordray is there. Well, this is 2007. This is even pre, like, Hot Tub Time Machine. Yeah, this is a daily show Rod Cordray. and he's out there as a minister protesting a gala I guess it's kind of odd to protest a gala like on a Saturday night like I don't know

like these people exist but I mean like it's just weird like oh that they would waste their Saturday night to do you think they go to a funeral well yeah but you do like pride or something it's just weird to be like it's a gala god damn it yeah I don't even know how they got wind of this gala there's a bunch of plant parenthoods around centralized here those people

exist. We got to hurry up and get this protest wrapped up. We have a reservation table for four at the chick fillet down the street. We're going to buy the place out. That 8th Avenue Chick-fil-A. There's all over, yeah. There's all over, yeah. Yeah, there's one right outside Grand Central now. Yeah, it's taken over. So they're like, you know, gay is wrong, gay is wrong. And like there are some people, it upsets

the people there. They show two people crying. And like, some of them are fighting back. Like, you're stupid and ugly. When Adam Sandler looks over and sees people being actually upset and he's like, oh, debity-duby, they're human. Exactly. Dude, this movie. Will, you pricked them. They dobley.

And his hard throws three sizes. It is so, this is where you're like, oh, not only is this movie like wrongheaded and unfunny. Now, surprise, surprise. It's also incredibly disingenuous. And sappy and like, because then he's like, hey, it. He's like, you guys got to clear. I'm a fireman. And then they start making fun of it.

He's a fireman. Then he's gay. And Rob Gordecher starts saying, Flamer. Flamer. And then he starts using the F bomb. And that's when he punches him in the face. And it's like this kind of weird bullshit trope where like, you need a straight man to, you know, like gay guys don't get in fucking fights all the time. Like, you know what I mean?

Like there'd be four bigger dudes that Adam Sandler. Hey, get the fuck out of here, man. Well, it's great that by the end of this movie, Adam Sandler and Kevin James alone solve homophobia. It's true. You just needed a big burly fucking hetero dude to figure it out. To solve homophobia, you take two servings of toxic masculinity.

You pour them together. It'll work out. He also forgot in the beginning where he took off his shirt and he is in like perfect physical feet. He's like Arnold Schwarzenegger, early days, long goodbye era. Yes, it's very nice to meet you, Mr. Elliot Gould. Yep. I really want to see that.

The backstage meeting between. Hey, how are you doing? Yeah, I worked with Robert Altman. Figure that out. You know, Robert was very good at the improvisation. So I can't believe we haven't talked about him yet, but this is one of the bigger scenes for him. Dan Aykroyd is the chief of the fire department. And this is where he calls them into the office because they make the papers for the punchout story. and this is where Ackroyd is like...

And again, look, homophobes get punched in the face all the fucking time. It wouldn't be national news. No, but go on. I'm sorry. No, and he's just like, so I know what you're up to. You're not fooling me. I'm not going to say anything,

but you can't be doing things like getting in fights and calling attention to the department. And he points out, like, if you get caught, these are the repercussions, which involve you won't have to pretend to be gay because prison rape. That's a joke in this movie. Yep, absolutely.

He's like, yeah, you'll wish you were gay because, yeah, you're going to be, your mouth's got to be, you're swall in a bunch of batons. You know what they do in lollipops in there? They gozer the gazarian. That's what they do in prison. They gozer the gazarian.

They'll give you a goes or the gozerian. That's my term for a butt plug. A prison butt plug. Just a can of diet coke. Now, there's multiple instances of rape gags in this movie. There's a shower scene soon after this. Now everyone in the fire department knows that they are a partnership

and they're like, oh my God, better not drop the soap. Man, a fucking drop the soap gag. A slow motion like fucking Kennedy's head opening up. Fucking soap gag. Slow motion. Yeah, that autumn flower

that is JFK. But they don't even like, they don't set up like, why are they all showering together anyway? I guess they all just came from a fire. theoretically, sure. I guess so. Well, it's like they got back from a fire, the chili's going to be done soon. God, it's all worship for dinner.

And I mean, like, the whole like fireman gag, like, is this movie about firefighters or is it not? Because it keeps vacillating between the two years. I'm going to, I'm going to answer that one. It's not about firefighters. But we use firefighters, like, to our advantage at the end of the movie. Because also, like, firefighters, I guess

in 2007, especially, it's like the lens of society is like, that's what a masculine dude is. It's like a selfish, straight underlined man that saves you from five. The perfect man is Dennis Leary. But you're also using that post-9-11 capital to like later parts of this movie when like

they need to like bend the law. It's like, well, I'm not going to throw a bunch of firefighters in jail. 9-11. But it's also an interesting trick that they pull because it then sort of prevents people criticizing the film or attempts to from like criticizing these people because it's like, well, man, you're fucking hating. heroes here. Exactly.

You know, it's like, no, no, first of all, they're fucking fake because they're actors. It's fireproof. It's bullshit. Man, can you believe that John Cina movie that's coming out? It's probably out now by the time this comes out. He's like dealing with a little kid and I couldn't believe this movie's coming out and it's not streaming. It's John Cina and Kegan Michael Key

and John Ligua Zamo's a bunch of firefighters that have taken care of a little kids and it's like kind of like three men and a baby with firefighters. Daddy daycare. It's a daddy daycare. kind of thing as well, I feel. Yeah, it's, it looks terrible. But I was just like, wow, because it looks, you look at the scenes, it looks exactly like the sequel to kindergarten cop. You know what I mean? Like, yes. Yeah, that's how it's shot. It should be a sequel to like, I don't know, fire down below. Yeah. Or what was that fucking Howie Long movie?

Firestorm. Yeah, maybe it's a sequel to Firestorm and John Cena is playing the character instead. Um, so whatever. Um, this is the girls day. The girl, there's, Basically the theme is like, yeah, all the firefighters like, ew, you're gay. Then Jessica Beal's like, hey, want to go on a girl's day? And he's like, yeah, Girls Day, girls day. And he's like doing this thing. While wearing that disguise again.

Yes. Because now they're like kind of famous. So he's at a bar alone drink. He's cold Budweiser. Weirdly enough, the disguise is kind of a Safty Brothers disguise. It is. I can kind of see it in one of those movies. It definitely is, dude. It looks like he's like a dude and like a bad like, like contemporary hair

hair metal cover band kind of deal you could have been in the back of heaven knows what I don't know I just like a spandex nation I feel like somebody comes into my bar in a clear disguise dude you gotta take that outside yeah this is a no disguises bar exactly like you are you're wearing the sunglasses the fake mustache

like I don't know you probably have a gun you just gotta get out of the bar right now right right are you robbing me or are you here to rob someone else look as long as you're not jerking off in public I'm fine Oh, are you? With anything. Well, with the disguise. Oh. Like, I'm fine with the disguise. You just want to walk around in disguise.

I just don't want them jerking off in my establishment. Chris Cabin's disguise world, where everyone has disguises. What if you're jerking off in public and you don't have a disguise on? That's 100% okay. Oh, all right. I saw the law is on my side on that one. I saw a guy jerking off yesterday, man. We both saw dudes jerking off yesterday.

Holy Bob. Both of you got mirrors? either of them have disguises not my guy he was just sitting right in his car jerking off my guy I'm coming up 14th Street the stairwell there in the subway

I have to get out catch a glimpse of yourself in the mirror oh fuck I'm jerking off I didn't even notice he's dangly doesn't know it his pants were around his ankles his back is against the wall

his eyes are closed and he is in ecstasy He's just like, oh, fucking man. And I'm like, oh, fucking man. And I just kind of walked past him. My guy sitting in the driver's seat of his car. Like, it was like way sadder. It was like, let's just get this over with before I have to go back to the office. Oh, wow.

This is in Westchester. This is in the suburbs. Who are your guys? Well, carjurker number one. He was a particular hero. Kinnison. I think Andrew and Steve, you both should have to get married to the separate jerkers.

Oh, I see. You know, I don't know, get some jerk off for your pension. Or maybe we stranger on a train each other and we kill each other's guys and no one'll know it was us. Swap jerkoffs. So there's this like shopping

montage that they go on with one of. I can't believe it. The most mind-boggling. Why? Brain teasers of a cameo I've ever seen. They go into like a little boutique and the clothier who is there assisting them is none other than the global music sensation

Dave Matthews No lines of dialogue It's all over music It's one of the things they do on their day off And you had a great theory about this, Steve Oh, it's just, it had to have happened It was a scene that did not work That you just folded into a montage

That we didn't have to cut him out Because he did a favor Dave Matthews did a favor to be in the movie anyway So he's kind of in the movie Maybe they couldn't do the scene with the audio, because between Sandler and Dave, right? Like, Sandler came in and he was like, habadidoo-di-du-di, and then Dave, like, held up a shirt

and was like, a little baby. This is the most interesting conversation I've ever to. Then Eddie Vetter Ha'n'Hanahe'i-ha-ya-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha. And some fucking dude The next table's going, Speak English!

Speak English! Oh, is that Larry the Campbell guy? You'd think he'd be the star of this movie. Sure. He should be... The Sandman doesn't associate with them fuckers, though, those blue-collar people, dude. He's above that.

He's a New York guy. Yep. He's also way more. more famous and powerful than them. Also true. Yeah. So yeah, but it's this montage. They wind up back at Jessica Beal's place. And again, I think they get caught in the rain or something.

Of course they do. She's like, oh my goodness. And you know, right into the fucking male bag, if you're a woman and you just get naked in front of your female friends, naked in front of your gay male friends. And then have them play with your breasts. Yeah, she'd be like, oh, grab my breast. For a long extended periods of time. That's what people do.

It's just like gals. Like, again, that makes sense if they're like if she's 12, you know what I mean? Wait, what? Don't do that. First of all, don't write in the mailbag if you've done that. Don't write in a year 12. But if you're like a young kid, like whatever, like, oh, cool, let's look at stuff. But like, she's a fucking adult woman. So you met him a week ago.

Exactly. A week ago. And someplace in the back of your Jessica Biel brain, you're still like, he's probably straight. Yeah. Or is he scatming the government? Yeah, yeah. Oh, they're fucking with me. And it's just like, oh, grab my breasts.

they're real. And he's like, how do you the ho-ho? And this is an insane where he's like, look at those hooters. And she's like, can you believe that these are totally real? Dude I met five days ago. Stepdad's like, yeah, I like that scene. Keep it up. Got some good

dialogue there. Hey, director, can we see it from the back? Hey, about close up, do again. I'd like a fucking scene of my steps on doing the goddamn lawn work. So I like the scene. Hey, Devin, do the fucking lawn work, Devin. There's an extended montage of Devin.

Fucking emptying that dishwasher. Hey, Devin, what do you think of that? Set that to a cool song. You cleaned out the dishwasher. I'm too sexy for my dishwasher. How about that, Devin? Your mom's going to be home soon. I've had a sick montage.

You thanking your mom for a nice dinner, Devin. But a fun little. couple of scenes of uh you not giving me hell at thanksgiving so about that david all that sandwiched between was borderline pornography and this is per the perfect film it is the perfect film for a stepdad for sure yes speaking of sons and their machinations uh the the the son eric that is uh yes fuck which one larry Kevin james is Kevin James is Larry his kids are Eric and Torrey right uh there's fun sequence I'll say it

where the son does a Johnny Cage move on a bully and punches him in the dick oh that's super fun yes was I in the fucking toilet when the hell did that there's this thing there's a scene where it's while the girl's day's going on Larry is a career day

Alan Covert shows up grandma's boys Alan Covert shows up and he's like first of all the teacher's doing a terrible job but see the grandma or the boy he was the boy he was a 40 year old boy think he's somebody two no somebody three somebody three okay number three

so what he's saying somebody one somebody to the adam sandler somebody's oh they're like the things to me but covert is the most famous of the bunch sure oh is it so he's been he jumped to thing number one well those other two motherfuckers never had their own solo movie and as a matter of fact i wouldn't be surprised if they're also slumming it

and grandma's boy nick sworetson definitely is in that movie there's probably some secret netflix movie out there where they're both have stars Well, Nick Swartson had that secret movie, Buddy, whatever the fuck, where he was like a porn star? Buckley Larson, porn star. There we go, yeah. Alan Corbord also was the number, was the buddy who has a lot of dialogue in Wedding Singer. And he's pretty good in that.

Oh, yeah, because he's like, what is he like, the brother-in-law? He's the guy who's driving the limo. That's like a mustache. I'll say from what I remember, which is not a lot, green-out situation, but grandma's boys much better than this movie. Oh, for sure. Oh, yeah. It's kind of fun. I never saw it.

It's fine. He's like a gamer. Yes. Yeah. And he's with his grandma. He builds a gate. Is Josh Gad in that? Somebody's in that.

Sure. Maybe sure. Yeah, fucking Josh Katz in the movie. Anyways. No, so like, the teacher's doing a terrible job. All the kids are asking like weird, inappropriate questions to a gay man. Like, hey, who's the man? Who's the whatever?

You got married. Who had to wear a dress? Asked a little girl. Also, by the way, this teacher is Sandler's wife. Oh, really? Yeah, yeah, yeah. And so, like, after the thing, Koverr goes up to Kevin James, like, hey man,

you know for the Boy Scouts thing, we're good. And he's like, oh, so we're good? He's like, no, no, we're good. You don't have to come. And then it's the same thing with Little League. And he's like, oh, why? And then he, I think he drops another F bomber, calls him gay or something.

And then he starts fighting him. Right. And then while that's happening, some bully comes out of nowhere. It says, you're dead gay. And we just something to happen. Just like you or something. Yeah. Oh, yeah, exactly. And then he does

to Eric's point, a Johnny Cage split punch to his nuts. I must have been looking down at my computer. I totally missed that. That was the most true scene in the movie. It was the best part of the movie. There's also this scene, I think it's another scene where they're hanging out, Beale and Sandler, it's kind of, because this movie

does not need a romance at all. It's just to be like, he needs a sexy lady to be pining for it and actually to make him a better man in quotation marks. Yeah. And there's, sitting on a couch and they're just talking about stuff they're drinking and fake plastic trees is playing from radio head oh right the idea of tom york getting a check from fucking an adam sandler movie makes me laugh yeah uh oh we've got that adam sandler money coming in

because isn't this the whole isn't this the whole scene where they're also making out yes yes she starts kissing him yes i shouldn't have done that oh by the way Tom Yorkson this week goes How do we're saying, I'm staying I'm staying alive. Mama brain to be mom Yes. Anyway, so but yeah, they start making out

and she's like, oh my God, why did I do that? And he's like, oh, you know, me and Chuck are pretty much like over with it. He instantly throws Kevin James under the bus. He's like, listen, our marriage is fucking terrible. This dude sucks. He says he hits me too. That's right.

That's right. In a last ditch effort to get a blow job from this woman. He's like, by the way, I'm a victim of domestic violence joke. So she kicks him out. I can't believe. I'm not going to be somebody that breaks up a marriage or something. Right, right, right. Also, somewhere around here, by the way,

Ving Rames is part of this fire department. And he's supposed to be like this big scary, you know, Rumored to have murdered his wife with an axe or whatever. It turns out he's just a closeted gay man as well. Who now has the courage thanks to Chuck and Larry. Chuckered and Laird. And now he can come out and everyone's happy. I was just reminded of that though because in that shower scene,

it's like the two dudes drop the soap. Everybody's freaking out. Ving Rames walks in, bends over and gets the soap. And you see he's got a tattoo on his ass that just says badass. Oh, wow. And then because, like, Sandler and Kevin James are, like, openly out. Yes. You know, in the department.

Now, he's, like, singing and dancing in the shower, like, coming out of his shell kind of a thing. Vindra was an incredible shape in this movie. Oh, yeah. Absolutely. He kind of fell off a cliff there. And those latter mentioned impossible movies, he was like, I'm just on a computer. Well, of course, you're going to get a little bit of a belly when you're just the dude in the van. Only thing that has to fit is the hat.

You're not wrong, dude. And the hat looks great. Yeah, he's fantastic. Dude, it's just such a great role. But you're right, he looks great in this movie. You get to see his behind. You get to see a little, uh, the fucking brush down there, my friend. Really?

He kind of faces the camera when he's dancing. I must have him like kind of obstructed by his shower wall, but he like gets up on his tiptoes at one point. I was like, there's some Vingram's bush right there. Look at that. You're not getting that in them Tom Cruise movies. Honey, get in here. Honey, look.

Look at it. What does Marcellus Wallace's Bush look like? It's got a Band-Aid up. Now the stepdad is like Ralph Wiggum putting the pointer down and like putting his hand. No more. Also this movie features the last person in the firehouse that matters sort of is the least of the Tatoros. Yes. Nick Titooro.

It's a very clear Titoro hierarchy. It's John, Ada, and then all the way in the basement is Nick. By the way, I think one of the other dudes is Bishemi's brother. Yes, that makes sense. Well, where was everyone else? Not those in the room, but those listening, where you found out there were more than one Totooro because it just happened to me right now.

Oh, wow. You didn't know about Aida Toto. From Sopranos. I didn't watch it. Oh, well, she's Tony's sister. Yeah. She's a great show. Okay, everyone knew.

And Nick Titoro was on NYPD Blue. He was in something else recently that I caught. He's in stuff. Yeah. He's in a bunch of shit. I like my NYPD clean. 100% clean comedy. Good word.

At this point of the movie, the last act thankfully arrives where because they're sort of celebrities for no reason whatsoever, they start going to like gay pride festivals and stuff. They go to a pride march that I'm pretty sure. It's like supposed to be the pride parade. Yes, yeah, yeah.

I'm pretty sure it's just fucking green screen. Because there's like there's B-roll of like pride. Yeah. and then it's like the two of them walk in Sandler lazily waving this fucking pride flag you could just tell it's like Dennis I don't want to do this scene kind of a thing and they're wearing like the

Mrs. Pitt and Mrs. Whoever It's Mrs. Timberlake which is Oh yeah. The IMDB they'll tell you you know he's wearing that because actually Mrs. Timberlake that's Jessica I want to put a gut in my mouth It's unrelated to Yeah I was going to say is that new

No it's not new so anyways Jesus Christ Nicholas Titor was born in 1962 he's an older man he's looking good though dude I mean this movie's

fucking 12 years old I guess but they wind up a news report comes out that Sandler has had sex with all these women

16 women in the last few months they say and also it's like page three news for some reason that this one guy that punched out a fucking homophope once had sex with women and again

it's right here the editorial on Obama although I think because also after the punch out though aren't they kind of made famous by the fact that they're like fire fight out FDNY kind of thing you're right I think so then there's also like the only scene in the movie that kind of

works almost which is they kind of Dan Aykroyd brings them brings them into his office he's like listen everybody signed a petition because they want you guys at here, but I'm not letting that happen.

But because of whatever, you have to work different shifts. Right. And like, oh, we always work at the same shift. We're buds. We're partners. We look out for each other. Nope. Get out of here. Ayah, aye, aye, aye, aye, aye. Herda, what, hoot. He said, Mattis, goes back.

Bradley Hoare. Ready, hey, hey, yeah. How about it, boobo. But, boom, bach, bam, back. What John of the Davis comes in? Shit, this is a super group, man. I can't wait for this single. That's Bjork, that says?

Yeah. What? Oh, shit. So, the big blowout scene. Larry comes out to the fire department, and he's, to the whole group,

and he's like, oh, so everybody signed this petition. You've got great signatures here. And he's like, hey, McGillacuddy, remember when, you know, It's always a big of guillicuddy. Sure.

Remember when Chuck loaned you all this money because you're gambling debts, guess he wasn't too gay to give you money. Right. He does that to a bunch of different people. And the only time I think the F-bomb even reasonably works in this movie is when he's like, hey, when he saved your life,

he wasn't an F-bomb then, was he? Or something like that. I'm like kind of there with you, but I just realized the other thing is none of those dudes ever call them that to their face. Yeah, yeah. You never hear any of the other firefighters actually say that.

It's just fucking Chuck and, Larry. I smell a deleted scene when they're all cooking new with each other. Just saying the F word over and over and over. They're making a huge big thing of chili. They're making a banner with the word on it. So that's that and

Chuck and Larry kind of have their own scrapes about who's doing the dishes or whatever the fuck's going on. There's a big like end of second act blow out on a roof. And then the idea is okay we have to go to court. Jessica Beal is okay defending them. Well there's also now my the one scene of this movie that

worked for me, got a legitimate lab, thoroughly enjoyed. I think I know where this is going. Steve Busemi starts like yelling at like he comes by again and there this is the buildup to the court case. Oh, right, right. And he's like, oh, I think the winds are starting to blow in the direction of justice or whatever.

He takes a basketball, throws it in the air and it lands on some dude's barbecue. That was funny and I got a legitimate laugh at that, but I thought you were going to pull a classic Eric Siska misdirection. and say that the funniest laugh out loud moment for you was when Kevin James was thrown out his dead wife's clothes because that's one of the things Sandler's criticizing him for

is like you haven't gotten over your wife you keep all her clothes in the house it's fucking weird you got to move on from that shit and find yourself a lady kind of a thing you wouldn't be in this whole mess if you could move on from that I think this was my bathroom break but it does make it was actually better than the film but fuck that that is that is something else huh just throw out her memory

yeah but then sandler's like oh you did it good job babbabity boo hey larry why'd you throw out my clothes oh this is an emotional day for me tip do not make fun of my fucking dead wife tip for the folks at home let me tell you don't mock your friend's dead spouse just a pro tip why don't you give my property to chalk Why don't you stop being a big piece of shit and help him out? Give Chuck the deed to the house. You should get me out of that plot in the ground and throw me in the garbage

because maybe you should sign that plot over to Chuck. That's valuable land and I'm trash. Larry, why don't you kill yourself? We could be together. It gets real weird. He's like, oh my God, what? I guess I have to kill us. I'm waiting on the other side.

This is that gothic horror porno I was talking about. Kill the kids and kill yourself and leave everything to Chuck. Oh, Chuck. Oh, man. That's below the belt, buddy. That's something. We're getting word from the other side, child. So, yeah, this is the big court case happens.

What in the fuck? Jessica Beale's ready to roll. The king of Brooklyn shows up this guy in this mustache. He's the decider. He's not like a judge. I think he's a councilman, they say. But even still, like, what? Oh, Richard Chamberlain, you mean?

Yeah, yeah. I believe that's who this is. I guess he controls the pension stuff. Sure. Counselman banks. And it's this, it's not just, you would think this would be a thing where you go into a room with like three or four intermediaries and you hash this thing out. It's, A, in this insane Star Trek blues set, which I don't even understand.

And it's packed to the gills with fans and well-wishers. It's a huge court case, man. It's like the fucking ended to kill a mockingbird. This place is packed. Nick Swarton's yelling shit out. Oh, and all the firefighters, by the way, have learned their lesson. They come to support Chuck and Larry. And, like, they're wearing their, like, you know, firefighter blues and everything.

But it's a weird, like, why were they sitting in where, like, a jury would go? Exactly. All the firefighters are sitting in this jerry box, did not get it. So they have their story straight, and they're like, yeah, we met here, we fell in love here, da-da-da-da-da. Like, well, the case is closed. Then Steve Bisham is like, no, no, no. Let's interview them separately. And this is when, like, Dennis Dugent starts doing some directing right here, which no thank you.

Too late for that, we're an hour and 35 minutes now, buddy. A little late in the day to direct this movie, my friend. Because it's like this thing where, like, we're doing like angly, incredible Hulk. shit with like split panels and whatever. And it's all shit like, like, yeah, a dabby-d-d-d-d-d-I. I mean, I guess his favorite album would be a poison. And it shows how much they know each other.

But then it gets like fucking deep, though, because it's like, you know, Sandler has to be like, yeah, the day his wife died, you know, he saw a comment, but I just, I've never seen him like that. I was like, what fucking, I've never stopped laughing since. I've ever seen comedic gold. like the widowing of my friend The day his wife died

Oh man You know his wife is dead And I think she'd sound A little something like this Oh my God I'm a dead lady Oh Mr. Councilman You shouldn't award them anything

All the money should go to Larry He should put them both into two Hey hey no don't do I'm talking from Chuck now So there's also this scene about Chuck saving a child And like you were so distraught And Larry stayed with him the whole night Because he was so upset

Because that you know blah blah blah blah blah Too little too late movie That's just firefighting folks That is just firefighting And firefighters are heroes I'm not saying that they're not No but this movie uses that idea as like a pawn Oh absolutely it's cheap

It's cheap It's totally cheap And Bushemi I mean this ask And it's so grossly inappropriate. And then he's, they're like, the council was like, well, shit, everyone win. Chuck and Larry wins. That's just the end of the day.

And then like, well, excuse me, they should kiss in front of us first. And even the councilman is like, no, that's actually a gross idea that is not okay. Yeah, like Richard Chamberlain and Jessica Buehler both like, no. But then like the audience, like a fucking sitcom in the mid-90s is like, who. Oh, yeah. Yeah, I think that Chuck Ler should make out. Oh, yeah, there should definitely kiss. Yeah, I definitely like to see them kiss.

And then Oliver Reed whispers into fucking Chuck's here. You have to win the crowd, Chuck Muss. And then you will be emperor. And again, no, we won the case we're leaving, but no, and they're about to kiss. And, like, guys have kissed for comedic effect for, like, 20 odd years at this point. Sure. Seinfeld and Kramer kissed. It was all over Saturday Night for like 20 years at that point.

Yeah. But they can't do it. They cannot do it. No. And it's like we need Dan Akkrad to break this door down and interrupt this kiss because Adam Sandler is not going to. And you know what movie? Here's the thing.

Fuck you. Because after all of the fucking shit that I had have to sit through, I've had to watch in this movie. You are obligated to fucking have them actually do this. Yeah. You fucking babies. Dennis, I'm not doing that. Exactly.

Like, I feel like the kiss would be the easiest of asks instead of rearranging my entire fucking life. Exactly. I would rather kiss you than move in with you. Exactly. That's what I'm saying. I'll kiss anybody rather than move in with him. That's a guarantee.

I don't need roommates. So Dan Aykroyd storms in and he's like, goes on the Gararian? Oh, sorry, I mean, Richard Chamberlain. And he's like, I'm this decorated dude with things from Dinkins, Koch, and this motherfucker goes, and the great Mayor Giuliani. Fuck you. Agree, agree.

Motherfucker wasn't even mayor. He was mayor. In 2007? Oh, no, but no, the idea is like all of these people have decorated him, and especially Mayor Giuliani because of 9-11. Bloomberg told me to drop dead. Yeah, I guess that's true. This is at least the second instance

I can recall of Giuliani getting his fucking ass kissed by Sandler if you recall the ending of anger management. I believe he contributed to his presidential campaign at something. That would make sense. Yeah, that fucking checks out. Because he's a great hero.

Habbity-dubity indeed. That's how he's speaking these days. Forget all those. You're totally right, dude. You see him on. Babidi-Dubi-Dubi! Dubu-Dubi-Dubi-Dubi, Hillary Clinton. Giuliani, bye-bye! Oh. No, in the end of fucking anger management where, like, it's revealed to be a big sham from Jack Nicholson.

And the whole thing goes down at Yankee Stadium. I've never seen that movie. It's ridiculous. I saw it once, I don't recall. But it's like, by the way, Adam Fanler, it's me, Mayor Giuliani. America's Mayor here to tell you, it's all been a big scam from Jack Nicholson. He's like got lines in that movie. That's unfortunate.

Yeah, it stinks. Anyways, we're going to unfortunate this movie. So then he's like, listen, they were straight the whole time and I don't want them to kiss because, well, the stepdad's don't want it. We filmed it one way. The stepdad didn't want it to happen. You got that right, Dan Aykroyd. Instead, we will now spray Jessica Beal with a hose.

A pudding hose. Then the credits roll over. Honestly, it would be fucked up, but I'd be like, wow, well done. We're also bringing back those sister characters for some reason. The stepdad's were insistent. But he's like, no, they were straight the whole time. But because they're heroes, you should not throw them in jail, even though they've actually broken the law.

and I've just admitted to it. And he's like, actually, if you're going to throw them in jail, you should throw me in jail as well because I knew. And then we have this whole fucking... Spirnick is shit. And then they all get thrown in jail. All the firefighters get up one at a time. You throw me in jail, throw me in jail. They all get thrown in jail.

It's like, L.O.L. And Richard Chamberlain comes out. It's like, well, I don't know if you guys knew this, but you're heroes of the gay community for some reason. And I've gotten so many calls. I'm going to just give you guys a slap on the wrist, but you have two conditions. One, yeah, you have to admit to the whole thing, and two...

Yeah, they've got to plead guilty to something, like, fraud. Yeah, forging government documents or something. But then they're going to get away with that with a slap on the wrist kind of a thing. Well, at least you weren't selling marijuana, or else I'd throw you in jail for 70 years. You know what, boys, thank goodness you were just trying to defraud this system for benefits instead of, you know, selling loose cigarettes in front of a convenience store.

But they get out of jail. on the condition that they produce a firefighting calendar for big gay question. You know, like, what is this? What? Who is the, like, I understand who it's for, but like, what is the background

manufacturing a deal of this calendar? When you see, like, the montage of people picking it up, the whole gag is like, oh, and here's all those gay firefighters. Because that's like a joke that, shockingly, isn't really used in the movie. But, like, that's been a joke in other pop culture things. is like gay firefighters they could be anywhere and so you have

all these dudes they walk among us was that a canon film probably dude I'll watch that movie like tonight tonight I will watch that movie but they also had done calendars at the start of the movie that were fucking for hetero they were for ladies only

and yeah I don't get what the difference between the male calendar at the start of the film and the mail calendar at the end of the film the lady who shouts at the fire truck passing that she loved the picture of Adam Sandler with the hose between his legs. Some dude

probably also likes that same photo. I don't know how they just made a quote, gay calendar. The only thing that's remotely gay is that the Chuck and Larry picture is of them holding each other. Oh yeah, like Kevin James is holding Adam Sandler and Kevin James doesn't have pants on. And like the, again

the Photoshop is insane. It's like fucking Charltonested in the Ten Commandments. Where does this body come from? Dude, yeah, it's fucking Kevin James was just holding a crash test dummy. And then Sandler was like, do boo do do daboo put my fucking face over that because I'm not going to sit for that photograph. And that's the end of the movie, right?

It should be. But then there's like an extended 10 minutes where Ving Rames and fucking Nick Swartson get married back at the chapel because Rob Schneider has to come back. And doesn't David Spade come back at some point? David Spade is outside the courthouse when they're walking in for the trial. And he's like, hey. Is it a kissy face? Yeah, whatever.

But yes, it's that. And then, like, because Nick Swartson is Jessica Biel's brother, Jessica Biel is there. And she, and, like, she even says to him, and he's like, hey, so you want to dance. And she's like, well, no, you felt me up under false pretenses. Yeah. Which is, you know, pretty bad. Yeah, that's a bad one. And they're having this, like, table conversation whilst Lance Bass starts singing at this wedding.

The only gay person in the movie, as far as I could tell. Like, the only, like, actual homosexual man that appears in this film. As far as I could... Yeah, I mean, without doing a deep dive. But, like, you know, it's all straight actors. It's... Of course it is. I mean, yeah.

And that's the end of the movie. They actually do start dancing. And again, Dennis Dugan does more directing. Do you notice that last shot was crazy? This was horse shit. We, like, do a helicopter shot up. You see everybody dancing. On the dance force.

Someone is break dancing, by the way. You catch that? Yes. Inappropriate. It turns into a little circle, and the disc falls into... to the Niagara, like a toilet flushing, basically. It gets flushed down Niagara Falls. The movie does.

Yeah. Which is, I guess, appropriate. It's where it should be. At the bottom of neck. The shot at the end of I pronounce you, Chuck and Larry, was Dennis Dugan admitting that he had lots of problems with the film. And thus flushed it. I've seen Chuck and Larry 10,000 times and analyzed it for this documentary.

Turning movies into pieces of shit is a theme in Dugan's directing. That's a trademark. Making bad movies. I will say the movie throttles back just in time to prevent them from like making out at the end or like getting together.

He's like, do you want to dance? She's like, yeah, I guess so. And that's where it ends. As that dance floor gets flushed down Niagara Falls, they are not making out.

I'm surprised at the end, last scene isn't her being like, wow, that was the best heterosexual sex I've ever had. I can't believe you're enormous. It should have been like when the credits roll and then it's like,

Oh, and like they both hit the pillow kind of a shot. And then just say how great Adam Sandler is again. Be like the end of the world is not enough. Yes, yes, exactly. And that is the end of this movie. Thankfully, this might be one of the worst Adam Sandler movies ever made. It is. One of the worst movies ever made.

Well, I want to ask you first, Andrew, was this? Because you walked out of Don't Mess with Zohan? Yes. Was this worse or? It is worse. I didn't see Zohan. I mean, I just, walked out of don't mess with the Zohan because I really

wasn't liking it. I thought it was dumb. I was seeing it for free and it was one of those thoughts of like I could literally be doing anything else. But like this I can tell you, Chuck and Larry is a worse movie than that. Just because of like everything that's happening around it. Zohan, I was like, this is

dumb because the Sandler character is really annoying me. Sure. This the whole movie's annoying a person. It's that and it's like all of this. I mean like nobody learns anything. By the way, at the end in the court, seen, Adam Sandler does say to the audience, hey, you shouldn't say the F word

because I used to say that, but I was wrong. It's like saying, it's like saying Jewish slurs for me or calling me fat. And like, he throws the K word out this movie, which I was very surprised to hear. Which is actually like, that's sort of something. Like, to equate those two loaded terms is a way to get there. But like, it's not earned it off.

We weren't playing it for laughs for the rest of the movie. You can't do it. I'm saying, like, this movie is so disingenuous in its resolution. Also, like, I think the only way this movie works is if, like, Adam Sandler finds out he's gay halfway through or something. Like, you know what I was actually wondering about that. It's sort of like, in and out or something. Exactly. Like, it's a joke and he's, like, so straight, blah, blah, blah.

And then he's like, oh, shit, I'm actually gay. And then, like, that's almost a movie. Right. But, like, Kevin Klein will do that movie. Yes. Adam Sandler will not make that movie. Yes. Yeah, not quite yet.

So no one's recommending this. absolutely not. No, absolutely not. I can't think, I genuinely cannot think of a movie from Sanders' career that is of this caliber bad. I really don't, I can't think of one that I put it. Because so much of like the badness of Sandler movies is like they're just annoying and stupid. But this is like irresponsible. Yes. Like in its messaging and shit. And for a movie that made over $100 million in the United States alone. Which is now like, I guess nothing because everything we know now must break records. Got to be a quarter

quarter bill or don't wake me out of bed, man. That's how much it should wake at the opening weekend. But yeah, I mean, also like the other probably, yeah, it's all that and it's all just like, I also think that like the whole sandlerism thing only works in low stakes environment.

You know what I mean? Like you're throwing your your hat into a world. You have no business being in. You don't understand any of these issues. It's like the, it was also the end of the Bush administration. It's really kind of important. This came out in 2007. Yeah, totally. Because I do think that, like, later on, like, I mean, certainly this movie couldn't come out

today, I don't think. No, I was... No, no. No. It would be, like, the dude. Like, if this movie came out now, it wouldn't be an Adam Sandler Happy Mads and thing. It would be like the dude that did Laquisha. Yes, exactly. The Breitbart channel would put it out.

What the fuck? And it's like, so people will probably criticize us for, you know, ragging on this movie because, like, oh, well, that was the time. Like, motherfucker. I was there. Yeah. And yeah totally. Fucking broke back

mountain came out two years before that shit. Exactly. That's a great point, Eric. Motherfucker, we were there. I remember.

It shouldn't have been like this. And it's just like, people need to understand that like pop culture and movies for a lot of dudes and ladies out there. You know, it's just like,

oh, this is just fun, whatever. But like, it's detrimental. Like there's certain types of representation. And it fucking matters. People saw it.

And, people saw this movie 100 million like i know now we fucking make fun we piss on a hundred million dollars yes but make a hundred million dollars at the fucking box office means you were seen by a huge portion yes of the fucking public and you were seen i mean the the movie tries to have have it's cake and eat it too with the you know the gay jokes plus the gay is okay message at the end which is too little too late way too little because because now like okay so i'm going to have to go through this journey of all of that fucking shit to get to this You know, fuck this shit.

Do you guys know that Adam Sandler was uncredited on two separate episodes of Kevin Can Wait? Oh, wow. Yeah. Best buds. Is that could cancel or what? I don't know. They retooled it. They brought in Leah Remedy. They brought in the big ones. Yeah, they

murdered his other wife. Oh, no. Now I'm a dead person. That is, I now pronounce you, Chuck and Larry, directed by Dennis Duggan. If you want more, We 8 movies, head on over to Patreon. dot com slash we hate movies we got a big we love movies episode coming up this month it is the term it that's right speaking of arnold yes the first movie now you know we did an episode on t2 last year now we're doing t1 by the way that's not all that's on patreon there is a twilight

breaking dawn part two that is now out and available on our patreon feed but that ain't all likely the last power hour we ever do. Yes, absolutely. That's it. Only time we'll tell, but good Lord. We are too old. And time is told. A fucking smokementary. What? Leap glossary for this month is Boba Thad. Nice.

Heavy hitter, dude. Exactly. We're rolling out the carpet for the Mandalorian. It's crazy that we got them. Honestly, like Eric called in some favors. I was surprised you had that kind of cloud. Yeah. One that I know. One that I know. One that I know. You don't know enough, though.

And we have a two-part live animation damnation, live from Housing Works. It's an hour-long two episodes is an episode on Duck Tales and an episode on Teenage Muti Ninja Turtles. It's hilarious. And yes, Huey, Dewey and Louie are involved. Absolutely. They sound a lot like Chuck's dead wife. And I'll guarantee it if you listen real close, you can hear that dude staring daggers into me that was at that show. One dude did.

Front rower. There's always a guy that's not having it. But Steve Sadek on the regular feed here, WHM Prime, as we call it, the show rolls on. Certainly does. Next week, what are we talking about? We're going back to Arnold Country with Kindergarten Cop. That's right, dude, quick turnaround this time from our Portland show. Kindergarten Cop will be released on the main feed.

It's a fadet. You are under arrest kindergarten. So until next week, when we are live from the West Coast Tour, I'm Andrew Jupin. Steven Siddak. Chris Cabin. Eric Sisko. Take it easy.