We Hate Movies - S13 Ep682: Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom

Episode Date: June 27, 2023

The 2023 Summer Blockbuster Extravaganza goes to Adventure Movie Land this week as the guys chat about the iffy-but-fun 1984 prequel, Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom! As much as this film has some great scenes and set pieces, that dinner scene was, is, and always shall be wretched! But, how fantastic is Ke Huy Quan’s performance in this, along with his great chemistry with Ford? Is Willie Scott one of the most annoying characters in film history? And that entire mine cart sequence: Top 3 Indiana Jones action set piece, right? PLUS: An extended discussion on old-timey parachutes!  Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom stars Harrison Ford, Ke Huy Quan, Kate Capshaw, Amrish Puri, Roshan Seth, Philip Stone, David Yip, Roy Chiao, D.R. Nanayakkara, and, for some reason, Dan Aykroyd as Art Weber; directed by Steven Spielberg. Looking for more WHM-related content? Check out the hours and hours of exclusive bonus content on our Patreon! Check out the WHM Merch Store featuring new KONG, DILF Den, Grab-Ass & Cancer & SW Crispy Critters designs! Advertise on We Hate Movies via Gumball.fm Unlock Exclusive Content!: http://www.patreon.com/wehatemovies See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This week on the program, get ready to eat the most offensive dinner of your life as we talk about Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom. I'm Andrew Jupin. Indie. Stephen Sadek. Eric Siska. Gong noise. Chris Cabin. And we hate movies. Hello, Hello, everyone. Welcome to We Hate Movies. Thank you for tuning in. As always, that's right. We are talking about a big one.

Indiana Jones in the Temple of a Doom from 1984 directed once again by Steve Spielberg. This one, it's a black guy on the fucking filmography, man. I mean, with some of these actors, it's a black face on the filmography a little bit. Well, there's one dude in brown face

for sure. Yeah, the big security guard guy. Rote, yeah. Oh, is that the dude from Raiders? Yes. Oh, let's just put him in. We're having fun. We're having fun. He was the turban guy with the sword. And then he was also the guy gets punched into the fan. Yes.

I mean, it's a traditional storytelling device. It's in the theatrical tradition. I don't understand why you wouldn't want to see it. This movie is inspired by D.W. Griffith. All the grades. It's, to be fair, because I know that some people, I was seeing some people, be like, I can't believe they're going to do it. It's okay to like a movie.

I grew up loving this movie, but I changed a bit. I still like it enough. Like, this is still, I still have some nostalgia here. but it's the I mean and guess what it's the third best Indiana Jones movie and I'm gonna guess after Dial of Destiny comes out it probably might still be the third

I agree with everything you just said yes I'll say this just real quick Steve with you noticed someone saying I can't believe they listen folks fucking believe it all right this is a movie talk show we just talk like it's been going on for 13 years

the name of the show means nothing it's just a movie chat show. So guess what? You better start believing. We're going to talk about a movie. Believe. The truth is out. Good. God. Never talk about anything problematic, though. Oh, right. Oh, my

God, that makes me uncomfortable and gives me the wigglies and I can't I can't tweet properly. Eric, the wiggily. It's an epidemic. Everybody is getting the wiggily. There's so many wigglies on film Twitter. That's what happens when you eat monkey brains. You get the wiggily.

That's right. It fucks up your own brain, dude. Excuse me. Excuse me. They don't say explicitly that Paul Giamatti is an alcoholic and sideways. So that movie is got to go. Oh, man. This movie's kind of got to go, huh? I mean, it's, it's, it's weird. Like, it's weird. Like, the first 40, 35 minutes are amazing. I love it. I love the Shanghai opening. It's great. And you know what? Why don't we fucking stay in Southeast Asia? Yeah, totally. A little of that. Well, no, because all the race is. happens in India.

You got to get there to do it. There's some racism in the beginning as well. We're having a little bit of fun there. Chris Cabin introduced him with himself with gong noise. We're having a little racist fun at the beginning as well. I mean, that's inherently, and this is also a problem with James Bond

as a character, is all these characters are, Indiana Jones, James Bond. It's from the lens of an imperial power inflicting its will upon other populations. I mean, Indiana Jones was constantly stealing shit to give to his friend's museum.

I mean, it is weird that like, spoiler alert, at the end of it, the force that helps this, it's the British led Indian forces that really come to save the day. Literally the boys in blue, dude, absolutely. If you were

curious about the politics of this film, yes. When the colonel, because there's that dinner scene in the colonial guy. It's just like, oh, do, do. And like, the, the, the, the, the dude who plays Dalseem in Street Fighter, who also, right, is absolutely in Gandhi and a great actor in his own right. Yes. It's like, oh, yes, they like to look at us. Like, we're a bunch of their children and we have to be taken care of it. And this movie says, yes, they are. And they should and they need to. Um, what was I going to say about this movie related to?

That actor's name is Rohan, Roshan Seth. Apologies. Oh, the dude of the glasses. Very good. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Loll, I think his last name is. Yeah. Anyway, so we do start in Shanghai, 1935.

1935, because 1936 is Raiders. This happens right before that. Prequel, yes, the first prequel. Can I tell you that Spielberg, you know, he was hot. It was E.T. You know what I mean? He was coming off. He was hot.

Have you seen those photos of him directing in a show? Oh, yeah. Oh, dude. Those shorts. You are, you are calling action. and cut with the shortest of shorts and the tankiest of tank tops. Sort of a long, longish hair, the beard, those aviator sunglasses. He's got those Coca-Cola shorts and baby, I want to take a sip.

Then he went out and made out with a non-Jewish woman somewhere. Oh, yeah. Sammy Fableman style. We should get him going back to that kind of director outfit. Yeah. You know what I mean? Like you see him on the set now. He just looks like an old guy directing things.

Yeah, he's like, well, you want to see his old balls hanging out of a Short shorts. Dude, if I woke up one day and the headline was like Spielberg Hang's brain on the set of new movie, I'd be like, fuck yeah. Dude still got it.

Better brain than that's in this movie. Not sense. Philip Seymour Hoffman and Twister has a man's balls. This has been so obvious. Shield Scrotum. For the table. Oh, yeah.

But Lucas was like, oh, you know, Stephen, if you're going to do this Indiana Jones picture, this great idea that I have, it's actually, it's meant to be a trillum. so you need to direct the trilogy and he's like sure and don't and he's like and i totally have three

great story ideas and then like it's a quote spillberg is like but it turns out george didn't have three story ideas the first time that fucker did that shit yeah oh yeah i wrote that 10 years ago it's in my closet oh you just can't see it right now man hey steve sorry to uh change the story around the one that i definitely had going but i got to base this one around my fucking bitch ex-wife man she's pulling my heart out of my chest just like they're doing here yeah there's a lot of talk

like on Wikipedia and stuff about this film that he was going through that divorce with Marsha Lucas and that's why he was angry and mean-spirited it was his idea for child slavery for black magic and this cult she's crazy that was my copy of bringing it all back home

this is some bullshit I bought that it was original pressing and apparently explain the idea to Lawrence Kasden, who then said he wouldn't be writing it because it sounds too problematic even in 1984. Smart man. They couldn't film scenes in India because

the Indian government read the script and was like, what the fuck? Could we just scale back on the eyeball soup? Could we maybe get back on that? With the government response, the way it's quoted, at least on Wikipedia, they were like, what? This is racist?

What? What are you talking about? It's fun. It's fun. And the thing that sucks is, like, with a few minor changes, you could make this movie way less problematic, including doing the original idea for the scene where you get out all the information about, like, the thuggy cult and everything. Yeah.

In like some tiger hunt scene that they were going to have, and they replaced it with this fucking abysmal dinner scene that we'll talk about in greater length. After Lucas got out of Cass and he got the creative team that would later go on to make Howard the Duck to write this. writing team, hot writing team. Hot writing team. Hot spousal writing team. Oh, nice. So hot in the bedroom as well.

I assuming. Oh, you can tell that by just looking at the script, these two fuck. These two totally fuck. Oh, absolutely. But I think it was their idea maybe for the tiger hunt. And then they replaced it with this dinner instead because Stephen Spielberg didn't want to film on location too long. Now, here's the idea. We're going to have this beautiful dinner scene and at the end of the table. I know it sounds big. A duck with tits. how about that at the end of it among i mean we're we're dealing with the forces of evil eating chilled monkey brains why not have a duck with tiths yeah that's a duck surprise instead of a snake surprise you got a duck duck breast with another breast on top of it the snake surprise we're getting

ahead of ourselves we are getting ahead of ourselves it's fine we open in shanghai we do like and this is much like a similar problematic movie that he made 1941 this feels a lot like him just venting his Hollywood love. Like just being like here's a big musical number. I'm probably never going to do a musical until I'm like in my 70s or whatever. And then you know, he gets to do it. And it's pretty splash. It's fucking great. It's a birthday. Berkeley

musical number. It's pretty fucking awesome. And I mean, this is this and there's another line is the best of Kate Capshaw in this movie. She's doing it. She's dancing. You know, she's singing in Mandarin. You know what I mean? Like it's a it's a cool thing that she does. And it's a, you know, it's a very, like, kind of striking thing to hear this song that everybody knows in band room, like, oh, wow. Like, you know what I mean? And, like, this white actress doing it.

And it's a cool, like, mind-fucky, not mind-fuck, but you know what I mean? Like, what? Hold on. She ain't supposed to be speaking like that. Excuse me? It was kind of like when I watched that John Cena apology video. I was like, wait, what? No, but I mean, not, but what the fuck?

Could I get a refund? Oh, wait, the movie's going to get racist later. Okay, I'll get back to my Well, that's on your tickets that we promise this movie will get very racist. No, but I mean, like, that's like, you know, sort of like, that's a good melting pot thing, right? You know what I mean? Like, that's kind of cool. But it is very strange to have this movie, you know, do this clearly fantastical sequence such as it is. Because, like, she goes through the little, like, doorway set thing.

And that's when it opens up into this big black box soundstage where all these other dancers who are not participating in the staged performance in the nightclub are there and you're just like all right I mean I guess it is cool and I think all the choreography is great and the costuming is really great but like these movies don't have

weird dream fantasy sequences in them so to have this movie start with that is weird It's also a great song We can try to offend all the races all over the globe Anything goes Hey, anything does go in this movie, man. They are setting you up for the thesis of this film, which is indeed anything goes in 1980s Hollywood film.

Well, there was, they did want to do like one, one of the ideas was like an African shaman thing. And they're like, oh, that's too offensive. Of course. And like, yeah, so is, you know what I mean? Like maybe both ideas are bad. You know what I mean? Like, you know, like, I don't know, man.

A fucking African shaman thing, I think is way worse than just a white lady singing in a language. No, no, I'm talking about later in the film. Oh, oh, oh, oh, I thought you're talking about the pro. No, no, no, no, no. I was like, dude, what the fuck? I like that she sing. I mean, because the idea of the character, which is, she is a, you know, supposedly world famous

vocalist. She washed out of somewhere. We don't lie on our resumes ever. Let's be honest, Willie Scott is, it's the end of tar. Yeah. It's she's now she's now doing it in Shanghai in but she's a mobster's mall essentially yes you take that out of the mob

it gets really grading really quickly yeah like she's just there being like oh let's get the diamonds or what you know what I mean like that's the kind of the character I mean the problem is is that you don't really I mean you don't see her with the guy much no yes if that if the head Chinese gangster

Laoshea Laushe is supposed to be like her the guy she's with they're not even like getting warm with each other like yeah but you kind of get it because like she comes to the table like hey lao who you're talking to oh indiana jones aren't you a famous archaea i love that everyone in this movie from like the big city clubs in shanghai to the tiny little you know indian palaces way out wherever everybody knows that this dude is a world famous archaeologist there's a mention of the press in honduras labeling him as a grave robber at some point in this film so

maybe there's probably right here's negative press If an archaeologist was this hot, it would be world famous. It would just like absolutely breaking news, hot archaeologist travels to Honduras. No one's talking about Abner Ravenwood's abs or anything like that. Abner's abs though, dude. How about that? That's a fucking eight-minute video. Indy kind of spoils his inside agent immediately because on the way into the club,

they look at each other and give each other a big, we're in it together. Hey, he has to go and wink. I'm in it with you. You brought the gun, right? Because I don't, I don't have one. You have one, right? I still just love this sequence. I love when he's holding the tray with the gun.

I mean, Indiana Jones versus the Chinese mafia would have been, you know. And the lazy Susan and the, the, oh, yeah. Oh, that's great. Love that. They're hot chie going around there. I guess this is very bond, actually. Oh, it's super bond. Oh, yeah.

This dude, yeah, this poor, this poor, another dude who's had like, storied adventures. with Indiana Jones, this guy Wu Han, who's like playing the waiter here. And he's just fucking murdered against... Wu gone. Yeah, Wu gone is right. Wu long gone after this man.

He's just like... That's okay. I kidnapped a child as well. I've got your replacement. Yeah, I got him lined up. He's already waiting in the car. Don't worry about it, buddy. Training him since day one. But like he's got all these lines about like, oh, many adventures over the years, Indy.

Now I get to take the greatest one first. Blah, blah, blah. Which is Dev. I go first Indy. Yeah, you enjoy that, buddy. Yep. I'll say hi to Shorty down in the car for you. How he gets shot is amazing.

Oh, yes. Like, you know, like he reveal of the gun, then someone else pops a champagne bottle. And then they shoot them because they can get away. It's, it's beautifully made. And the way that they cut that too, I really liked. It's like you pop, pop, pop. You're seeing all the bottles and all the tables.

And it's like very disorienting. And then it's like pop from the handgun. Yeah. It's fucking good. Indiana, please. Take my body and use it. as a shield for yourself as you move throughout the rest of this restaurant. Oh, if you just did a Magroober with his body, that would have been amazing.

Oh, yeah, the last great honor, dude, having famed archaeologist, Indiana Jones use you as a human shield. But don't, Indy, don't be drinking this poison, dude. Like, you know what, if it comes over on a lazy Susan after this contentious thing, you just, you sent yourself and tried to kill you last night. Well, that's why it has to be a prequel, right? is because he, this is him young and still, like, wet behind the ears.

Like, we haven't met the, the consummate, like, professional adventurer from a 1936 yet. He had to learn all this shit. Like, don't, when a guy is clearly trying to kill you and short you on your shit. Yeah. Maybe don't drink something he gives you. But so all these, these famed adventures were teased about with Wuhan,

like, that never came across. He kept on fucking up, I think. I think he's just been luck up until now. That's why it's not this, because like that show Young Indiana Jones Chronicles or whatever it was called, like, he's still just being great, but it would be awesome if he was just like terrible at being an adventurer for that whole show and like somewhere towards the back part of the series. It's like, hey, I think I'm finally getting the hang of this. Every episode's him getting his ass kicked. That'd be so awesome. Oh, yeah. You just, do you think those

whip skills just come from nowhere? And then it's like, that's what, yeah. I mean, he kept trying, but the Nazis kept beating him up back then. That's how they got into power. It's just him dropping all these idols and breaking them. Oh, fuck. Marcus Brody's like furious. It's like, we're not going to pay for your travel stipends. Sorry, Abner, I dropped another one. Could me change my name from Butterfinger Jones to Indiana Jones by any chance?

Is that possible? Yeah, so they just sort of get into this argument. The dude is looking for Nerhachi, the ashes of this person who is like the first emperor of, you know, one of the various Chinese dynasty. and it's a weird I think this is just a clout thing like I got this dude's ashes there doesn't appear to be any like magical powers

associated with it this is a part this is a conversation piece for your party you know what I mean but it's like it's fucking badass you you

Laoshae this crime lord of Shanghai have this dude's ashes like that's a pretty baller thing and or maybe he's gonna eat them for power possibly yeah too much cocaine

he just stirs in snorts like Keith Richards' father. Yeah, do it up. It's funny how this series constantly confirms that every magical power is real. Like the arc of the covenant, the Holy Grail and here with the, by the way, what was it? Last Crusade is our Patreon episode

this one. That's right. It is. You want to hear us talk all about the Holy Grail? I know a lot about it. And the greatest of all, the greatest of all powers, Eric, white boy magic. Yes, because Indiana Jones just survives all this shit. It's like Christ is definitely confirmed a thing in these movies. And now it's also, you know, this thuggy cult is definitely a thing.

So I guess it's like a Neil Gaiman-esque reality where all religions are real. Like even fucking Zeus is hanging around somewhere. Even conspiracy theories are real. The aliens are real. He was involved in Roswell and Crystal Skull. True. That's right. Then, of course, I imagine that goes all the way to election

integrity. Yeah. I mean, that's also a problem and that's real. At this point, you definitely have to believe at the very least that if something bad happens to you. A greater being wanted it to happen to you. You can no longer deny that. There's enough people up there

working and doing shit that one of them wanted you shit fucked up. And I take comfort in that, you know? Like, oh, if I could shit on or stabbed, it's like, yeah, I don't know, Jesus, collie, whoever. I had nothing to do with it. I'm powerless in the situation. Zeus just one my shit fucked. That's right. You know, the thing about them

aliens and stupid crystal skull, it's a movie that confirms both like the modern day like Roswell shit but also ancient aliens yeah and like I don't know maybe we talked about this on the episode we did a thousand years ago on that movie but like I kind of think you just got to pick one it's either ancient aliens or Roswell X-Files aliens yeah not both and it feels like Indiana Jones would lean ancient yes that's the thing I just aliens in Indiana Jones I just know

it's not my thing I don't think it's good too much and also like you know what, dude, let's get some Nazis in here. What the fuck are we doing? I know that that was George's thing or I think George was like, oh, I don't want to do Nazis again, man. And it's like, yeah, I know dude, but you got to do Nazis. You can have them be occupying force

in another country. Sure. You don't have to be in Germany necessarily. You can be in Greece or something. Yeah, of course. That's what's really funny about making this movie a like prequel to Raiders is like, I feel like they're thinking it was like, well, the only way we could make an

Indiana Jones movie without Nazis in it is to do something before like 36, like the big year, you know. And then in Crystal Skull they do the Soviets, which I think is a good enough idea. The Soviets is a natural extension. And then sadly, just none of them worked. Only the Nazis

were. I think we're going back to Nazis with Dial, right? Yes, we are. Yes. So, hey man, if it ain't broke. And they're back again. I see them on Twitter all the time. That's true. If it ain't broke, make sure you're break it. because something had to break it. I don't know. We haven't seen Dial a Destiny.

I'm sure maybe it's fine. But now time travels real, I imagine, in that movie. Hey, you get to, you know, have a lot of things that are magic turn out real. It's fun. So someone gets to have their balloon popping fetish really taken for a stroll here because a bunch of balloons just fill out on the dance floor while this... It's not a shootout, really, I mean... We got some guns going on, but it's also just a big...

fist fight in a nightclub. It's the kind of fist fight that's very funny where it's like a bunch of people not directly affiliated with the original argument immediately get in the fight anyway as if they were like just waiting for it. Like sitting in the club like certainly hope someone punches someone in the face so I can get in on it. That's what entertainment was back then. That was like going to the gym as you get into a bar fight. Everyone was excited for that. But also it's just like there's sort of a shootout happening and people are like, yeah, yeah, send out the next dancers on top of it. Oh, that's so dumb. So it's just chaotic. I mean, and also, I mean, I, if I was at this restaurant, would be like, anybody else see that guy get impaled by a, a flaming skewer? That dude, thank you for bring that up, Steve, because I think that is the, it's best death I've ever seen in a movie.

It's incredible, but it is the earliest indicator of this ain't yo mama's Indiana Jones because this is such a violent, like, Indy picks up, it's a sword skewer that's got a bunch of like, you know, flaming chickens on it or whatever. and he raises this thing above his head and is like brah and hocks it through this dude's heart and you're like holy shit that's violent it's got i mean like the accuracy the velocity to get that in past the rib cage you think uh you know probably not the first time he's tried it that is what is what they're telling us because yeah the accuracy is bone chill oh he's practicing at home i don't know how you don't uh practice on the dog Right, Indiana. Now it's time for flaming skewers. This is the eighth dog we've buried this year. You better get better at this. That's really morbid. He's named after the dog he murdered.

I told you to hit the apple on top of the dog. I keep on hitting the dog. I told you, Dad, I consumed his soul when I killed him. So in a way, I am Indiana. You need to be prepared when you dance with the Chinese. Yeah, so the whole thing is. like Indy's trying to get well initially he wants this

diamond that was supposed to be his big payment and this is like Willie Scott right away acting like Abu the monkey much like Ray Winstone and Crystal Skull but it's just like oh my God Lau look at that big diamond she's got a wolf mouth

drooloon just like looking the lips she even does the Nirhachi is in a little earned an awesome little urn that goes on the lizard that Nerhachis is a real small guy and I'm like lady you are 32 years old you know you know what's going on here right you know what's going on it's this is it's and I'm sure Kate Capshaw is a completely nice person this is one of the most grading obnoxious and terrible movie characters I think it's all on the page it really

it's all it's it's nothing to do with her as an actress either it's just this is an awfully written and directed performance I think part of it too is Spielberg was just he was so fucking dick blind. He was just so horny for Kate Capshaw that he was like, I made a direct movie for you now. Hey, Kate. Yeah, come here. Yeah, no, you're doing great. You're doing so good. God, you look so fucking fantastic. Anyway, I got one note. Dumber. I was going to talk about maybe more annoying too, but dumber for sure. Louder. Yeah, louder.

Let's do louder. I understand the concept of you got like a show girl, fish out of water in this. kind of adventure would be freaking out. I think maybe someone else could have pulled it off better. Maybe someone could have directed her better because you're right. His fucking dick was steering the wheel. There was time

for love, Dr. Jones. It turned out, yes. There's one line of hers that I actually really like and I think that is the only one that has any humanity on it. It has any character. Is it, let me, can I guess it? No, it's not eke. I've said eke before. There's a lot of eke.

Or, ew! It's not new either. Oh, what about that? Not that either. They're the bugs. She, it's just one thing we'll talk about magic stones. She's like, magic rocks. You know, my grandfather was a magician.

You always had like, you know, a bunch of crap in his pockets. Rabbit up, what is? Rabbit in his pocket and a doves up his sleeves or something. And you made a lot of little kids happy and he died a poor man. I've seen this all before Dr. Jones. There's no such thing as magic. And I'm like, oh, wow, a fucking character. Like, holy shit.

The character just walked in. You're totally right, Steve. And, man, yeah. It's a tone of voice is different, too. Like, it's just, it's a character for literally two and a half seconds. It sticks out like such a sore thumb because it's the only time that happens. Everything else is eeks, acts, and ewes. Because if she's like a world-weary showgirl that's just like, magic fucking rock, get the fuck out of here.

You know what I mean? Like, without the swearing. But that's what's interesting, right? Because if she is indeed this world-wary performer who's been around the globe doing these shitty shows and clubs or whatever and she's seen it all, she should be less affected by all the bugs and whatever's like, then she is.

Brassy would be something, wouldn't it? Yeah. Give me a big fucking ballbuster kind of lady. I feel like that's maybe sort of what they were going for. Like a big brassy dame. But she does have any like self-reliance. There's nothing like, she doesn't believe in herself anything. And she's constantly complaining. She doesn't do anything. No.

Towards the end of the movie, I mean, maybe she hits some guy over the head. Yeah, I mean, like, oh, she's kidnapping. But you compare it to, you know, Karen Allen, like, well, that's fucking destroying everyone. It's amazing. I think that's the other thing is that they probably did not want to do exactly like Karen Allen. So, this is exact opposite. Yes, on the whiteboard. All right.

All right. So, uh, Marin Ray Wood was a good character. I don't know, Stephen. What if we did a bad character instead? Ooh, hey, George. That's a great idea. I mean, you know, he was going through that divorce. Maybe it's just like, oh, you know who's really loud.

You know who eeks around the house and Marsha? You know, I met this kid, Kei Hekwan. Maybe we just put all the character into a young man who's helping. Which would be Indiana. Great. Like, get rid of her character. Focus on the two of them. Yes.

They're great together. They have excellent chemistry. Key is amazing as this little kid playing this character. Batman and Robin. We're doing Batman and Robin. We're having fun with it. Yep. It would be just as weird also.

Oh, you don't worry about it. The way in which, yeah. It's kind of weird. I mean, actually, I think that's closer than you mean it to be because it's a thing where it's like Indy took him under his wing after his parents were killed in a Japanese bombing. By two-face. And then they started to have...

At the circus. They started to have sex after that. That's the Batman theory. This is the Batman man. I even said expert Batman man. I never said those words. I put it in your mind. What do you mean?

What do you mean? Senator, Senator, Senator, Senator, what did you mean by that? I want to see him go back because Kihei Kwan's never in these movies again. He's not in, obviously. Raiders, is the thing where he brings it back to like America and Marcus for his like,

is that your son? Like what's, like, I think immigration's like, what's happening here? What's the situation? 1935, immigration put him down. Yeah. Do you have any documentation of any sort of explaining how this? He does have a line where he says something like,

I'm going to take, oh, it's when he's talking about how much he loves the cute little baby elephant. He's like, the baby elephants, my new best friend. I'm going to take him back to America with me, which kind of sounds like he's been there before. So, you know, who knows? And you know what? We never need to know the history of short round and the dude never needs to play that character again. And I'm glad he finally silenced all those sad people on the internet. Because what would that even be.

Terrible. It would be terrible, is what it would be. He would have to wear the hat against it. And he's like, dude, I just want an Oscar. I'm not putting the hat on. You know what I mean? Like, no, I am not putting this old-ass New York baseball Giants hat on, yes. But yeah, and this is a great sequence where the antidotes on the floor, the

diamonds on the floor, then all this ice goes. Oh, that's a really great turn. And I like, that's a good, that's a good moment for her to be like, oh, no! Because she's like, almost got the diamond in her hands and all the cubes come. It's pretty cool. Right. So they eventually get out of this By jumping out a window

After cutting a gong down Which came in handy But by the way When he's falling out the window You get to see it's Club Obi-Wan Club Obi-Wan And you know what? And this is the other thing too

Gunplay which is what I need In all my Indiana Jones movies And it's up top but it's not in the rest of the film I love this fucking Tommy gun dude There are some guns used in the mines But not enough that I would come to just gun play We can praise the Nazis about Is they use guns quite

frequently. Well, yeah, and in the minds it's the villains using the guns for the most part. You don't even get heroic gunplay. How fucking funny would it be if you just see like a little key hey quad with a machine gun? Like, yeah, oh yeah, definitely. Your sons of bitches! Fuck you literal slave driver.

And he gets thrown against the wall and gets killed by his velocity. Yeah, well, I guess I got some of the kids too. I got a little overzealous there. I just couldn't help myself. Well, that just means you became an American today. Dude, I wonder about his line right here because they drop into the car. And it's so fucking funny because it's like, wait,

where's the driver of this car? And a little short round like peers over. And Willie Scott rightfully here is shocked again. It's a child driving a car. And he says, you know, we got to get out here. Hold on to your potatoes. I was like, is that a grab your balls? It's definitely a hold on your nuts. Yeah. God damn. That's awesome. Which suggests Indiana Jones has weird nuts. Right. Just big old potato balls. Yeah. Just accidentally coming out of the shower one day. He just happened to get a flash. So yeah, like when he was in a young adventure, he was Butterfinger Jones. When he was in college, he was Potato Balls Jones. And he's like, how about Indiana Jones? Is that cool? Like, yeah, they call him Potato Balls Jones

because he refuses to jerk off. He's like, I'll only empty him into a lady. He tried to be a surfer first, but California Jones died in L.A. So they get to the airport. Here is the weirdest cameo of all time, Dan Aykroyd, as art. Webber noted Englishman here. Yeah, Dan, we can't get a close up on you. You got a little white under the, under the little white stuff underneath the nostrils there, brother.

Hey, it's 1885. I'm just going to be a, I'm in a movie. Don't worry about it. It is so weird, man. I'm decked out of my fucking mind over here. And I, you know, if this dude went on the adventure, that would be kind of cool. And then you'd be able to, like, you know, proudly say, Dan Aykroyd in an Indiana Jones movie.

You could be killed early on, like, from Molina or something. Yeah. Yeah, he's like, yeah, he's crooked. I'm telling you right now, if the Dan Aykroyd character goes beyond this, Kingdom of the Crystal Skulls gets bumped up really quickly. Because too much of this guy, no, I can't do it. If ever there was a movie to bring back Art Weber, it would be Crystal Skull, dude. Yeah, you ever think about putting some vodka in there, Andy? But Chris, it could have been in this movie. And instead of going out the plane in a boat you just ride his body you know it's true you get

down you hang on to Dan Aykroyd you hit the fucking mountain side bam you hear every bone shattered I think you ride his like jalopy corpse down into the river I think your wrists are getting bent back on that one isn't that what Abraham Simpson does in that mountain climbing episode or whatever

he rides the person the murder horn or something yeah totally oh actually the question though is Art Weber actually crooked because the whole gag at the end of the scene is to get in this plane and he's like, yeah, yeah, it's going to be filled with paltry. Sorry, it's the last I can do in short notice. And Indy has the great line like, nice try, Laus Shea, and he closes the door and the gag is Laus Shea Airlines.

Very funny joke. I really like it. But I think he might be just, that's all that's available. Yeah, he's incompetent or what, you know, it doesn't know. So it wasn't like Lauchay's like, listen, if a handsome explorer and a little tiny boy come to get a plane from you, you've got to put him on one of mine with the crooked pilots. And you do know it's called China White. We can get you the good stuff. Because these dudes know seemingly about the whole, like, yep, you've got to dump the fuel over India and jump out. Just don't take off.

Like when he's like, nice try, Lao, say, oh, we're not going anywhere. Oh, okay, I'm being murdered. That's fair. Yeah. I don't know. Maybe they didn't get them in time and they just radio. I just assume they radio. I mean, that could be.

You kind of need that, though, because it is sort of weird. I mean, it's really cool to get that emperor's body. you're going to show it around your coffee table or whatever. Oh, for sure. But then also you're dumping a plane now. Yeah. You're just killing this plane. It's pretty expensive. But he probably recovered that diamond, right? They didn't get it, did they? No,

he doesn't get the diamond. He's like, all right, we're all going to sit here and observe this pile of ice. We're going to wait till it all melt, and whatever's left, that's the diamond. One of them's not going to melt. That's all keep an eye out for the one that doesn't melt. Oh,

my foot's on fire. I just feel like know, somebody, one waiter was just like, oh man, that guy was my best friend, you know, he got murdered today. Sell, hello. Yeah, a little tip. A little tip. Yeah, maybe it's like Wuhan's fucking friend.

It was just like, man, my friend was assassinated. Thanks to that dastardly Indiana. I'm going to go to a pawn shop and get a sweet $500 for this. So we see. Here's a question. Sorry. Oh, sure. Because it's, it goes to Willie Scott, which is a big problem with the movie.

Why does she go with him? him here. It makes no yeah. He doesn't have a gun to her anymore like he gets he doesn't have a fork to her tit by the way. He was going to fork her. He was going to fork her yeah. In the car there's some fun gag where the

the antidotes that are dressed that he's going in there. I'm not that kind of girl no time of love Dr. Jones. I just realized why she went with him. What's that? It's a 1984 fucking Harrison Ford. Look at this fucking guy. You're kidding me. That's true. No shade to Laus Shee, but he

holding the candle to Harrison Ford. Please give me a break. It's a soft kidnapping, I think. It's the best way to put it. Because anyone would let Harrison Ford fuck them or fuck him or whatever. Well, I think you're going to fucking take a plane filled with pigeons or whatever the fuck. I've flown a I flown a puddlehopper in Florida. I know what it's like. It's fine. I think the thinking here is probably like, you know, she sort of escapes within the like helps him. Sort of get out of there, blah, blah, blah. Now it's like, well, what is she going to do? stay in Shanghai and get murdered by Lashay? Like, because he's probably over it. Yeah. She knows too much. Like, uh, take the girl, I'll find another.

Yeah, exactly. So I think that's like, she can't stick around that club anymore anyway. So that's a good point. Um, we get, we get just the teeniest, weeniest bit of map stuff here. Yes. Which kind of sucks. Not nearly enough. You want to trot that fucking globe, baby. That's the thing, dude. And I was realizing that's why I think on our Last Crusade episode, I say, like, while I love both Last Crusade and Raiders, Last Crusade is better for me, like just by this smidious little bit. And when I rewatched Raiders, I realized part of that is because Last Crusade is the one where

they go the most different places. Yeah, yeah. Like when they finally, you know, get to where they're going in Raiders, it kind of just stays there for the rest of the week. And this is even worse. It's just two locations. I would love it if when they go on that like hike to go to Pankat Palace, it's literally you get the

map again and it's like it's a red dot that just is it's like a one little, it's like one third of an inch like ding. It would be great because this is like you know Shanghai to Chong King and then from Chung King to and then it stops. The map stuff would have helped. Apparently

in the original edit it was too fast. George Lucas thought it moved too fast. So Spielberg went back and added more matte paintings that weren't there originally, which I always love a matte painting. And there are some nice ones in this, but they're kind of brief. And a little map stuff, it would have gone a long way. Even if it was just a hiking map.

That would be kind of fun. And it's just like it's way closer to the ground too. I like that idea. But so you know, he gets in Indiana Jones Garb. He was a sexy tuxia. You don't know. dressed like in the other Jones.

Oh, actually, I'm sorry, but you just remind me, that's another knock against this movie. The reveal of Harrison Ford in this movie totally sucks. What? Listen. I'm trying. The other three movies, Crystal Skull included, when you see him for the first time,

it's a cool shot. Yeah. In this movie, he enters the movie just walking down the stairs and the cameras behind him. But there's no like presentation of like, And Hughes, Indiana Jones. The other three movies have that. Yeah, we shot our load with the Willie Scott opening. I see what you mean, but still, I mean, it still has to be Crystal Skulls just because it's a handsomer Harrison Ford.

I mean, like, I don't want any knock of Crystal Skull's level. He's looking great. But like, this is the prime stuff. No, it's not a knock. It's the way that they present the handsomeness. God's light right on. It's presented. It's presented as an afterthought.

God's hot boner life. first you see is Willie Scott so much like directing with your dick in this movie that she's literally standing in front of the title which is a real like wow you better be married is that another bond thing

like we're doing music and ladies yeah this whole sequence opening sequence is so bond yeah so anyway so yes we're in the plane and take taking a nap after like round 7 of 87 of the cavetching that these

two have with each other. It's just fucking exhausting, man. Burned fingers, cracked nails. Pilots that are gone. Pilots that are out the fucking window. I love these dudes, these pilots like sneaking out laughing as everybody's sleeping and they're

sneaking out of the plane. I also love a 1930s parachute just sagging on your ass. It's just fantastic. It is like the old, you look at fucking Mickey Mouse. I know that's how they used to do it and that's why I know that Mickey Mouse did that it that way. as well. However, an adult

man with a fucking parachute on his ass looks like Mickey Mouse about to fucking sky down. Do you think more people parachuted in that setup because of the war and whatnot versus now when you just have people like doing it for fun? Absolutely. Oh yeah. Most people have parachuted

Mickey Mouse style. Well, not most people, but the people who have parachuted. In the history of the world we're talking? Interesting. I think probably recreational has to have beaten it by this point, right? But you're saying there's more recreational skydivers than people that served in the military and had parachute training? Yeah, that's what I'm curious about.

But the other thing is not where the modern military probably updated it to be more like the X games than Mickey Mouse. Oh, they're not wearing them on their ass anymore. It doesn't look like a diaper. All right, recruit, you'd get your skydiving suit on and you also get your snowboard because yes, you will be snowboarding out of this plane. Cadet! Get over here, cadet! Where in God's green acres are your Oakley sunglasses, boy? We have orders from General Sean White.

Captain, catch some wave. Captain, I told you I can't jump without my Baha blast. I need my Mountain Dew. You will jump, boy, and it will be fucking gnarly. Do you hear me? I'm making as gnarly as I can, sir, for the glory of the country. I swear to God, Private, you are the least gnarly and tubular cadet. I have ever seen.

I'm trying to be a little more radical but too. I want to see you grind on the side of Everest. I want you to do it now. Sir, yes, sir. Don't like Code Red. My God, what is wrong with you?

Oh, yeah. X-Games military. Easy. It's a good one. This just in from the skydiving news network. They've discontinued the Mickey Mouse Parish. No longer will it be a

hanging around your ankles as you skydive. We've gotten rid of the dumpy ass, says a parachute maker. No longer will us skydivers have to look like we're wearing adult diapers just to have fun. Yeah, so these dudes jump out

with their little ass hanging parachutes. Shorty wakes up or Billy wakes up and it's like, ooh, no pilots. I love that Indiana Jones is sleeping through a fucking door on a plane getting open. That's pretty impressive. Great Harrison Ford reaction here.

Do you know, do you know to fly a plane? And he's like, grab him. He's like, no, do you? It's so good. You know, he notices that the fuel gauge is empty. So it's, uh-oh, what are we going to do? Getting this big raft and jump out the plane with this. And this is another ridiculous thing where, like, I see how fast they're going down this hill in this thing.

And I'm a kid that did a lot of snow tubing in my day. You know what? just roll out of it roll out of it into the snow you'll be totally fine true then you're not going to be falling off mountains I mean this is

I mean this is this gives the fridge from Crystal Skull a little something to say in terms of like living through this I think it's more realistic than the fridge

I mean it's well here's the thing also in Crystal Skull they try to top this with Karen Allen's got like the aqua car oh right and then it's like

John John Hurts like, oh, something three times blue blah, blue blah, because all he does is blue blah,

blue blah through most of that movie and they realize what the three he's talking about is this car is going to go over three waterfalls

and all of them will and I'm like, good Lord. I just rewatch that and man, it's still really bad. I fucking sucks. I was hoping

for it to be a little more I foresee when this new one comes out there's going to be a rash of online people. Oh, of course, the willies. The people

that have the willies. They're like, oh, every bad movie's amazing. It's going to be like, because this is the first one that's not Spielberg, and we love Spielberg. And rightfully so, it's going to be like, well, at least that Spielberg and blah, blah, blah. Again, I don't know what this movie is going to be good, bad or otherwise. But Crystal Skull will never be a good movie because it's not a good movie now and it's not a good movie tomorrow. Like, listen, Stephen Spielberg, while, you know, the record is pretty decent, he's made some fucking stinkers. And that's one of them.

And also to be like, oh, well, it's the first one without Spielberg. So, of course, it's terrible. Like, don't undercut James Mangled. he's a very good director like of course he's not as prolific and big as Spielberg but he's a good director I just can't wait to see one of those accounts like show four pictures from the terminal and be like oh my god

the cinematography at work in the terminal dude there's people there's people that now will tell you that's a good movie yeah it's already happened it's donkey shit it's okay to like a movie if you got that taste that's fine oh that would you know good good idea for the terminal

it's just you keep going to the map but it's just one red dot on LaGuardia airport you go back It goes out a little, it comes back. But for some reason, when they go to that map, it just keeps cutting with the John Williams Indiana Jones music, too, though. We can zoom in on the red dot and it becomes a ketchup packet.

Catch a packet. I would say this boat dot. I mean, you have about the same. It makes more sense that Ewan McGregor and Scarlett Johansson survived that header off the 60-foot fucking tower in the island. It's about similar height, I would say. Totally.

And that's just like. man yeah so but yeah they're immortals so they they ski down as a mortal but we're told by Willie Scott that she hates water hates being wet whoa sorry sorry it's not true

no it's incorrect it's I hate the water I hate being wet and I hate you you ever hear that line it's a weird either ADR or I hate you it is very gutteral hey Stephen

could yeah hi yeah kate hi i love you too it's so great that we're working like this every time i say i hate being wet could you stop saying not true could you just for me the sound guy told me they're picking it up on the microphone so they were probably slamming ass during production i don't know that he says that he like met her yeah yeah yeah he met her fucking you know what's i i don't know i don't know what it was they started slamming as you put it. You're putting so much and you know what. It's like it's just the box the size of the fucking mouth. I'm not saying

necessarily that area, but the slamming ass is what a nice little colloquialism I use for a multitude of making the love. So, you know. I'm going to start saying making love. I've been too dirty on this show. Oh, is that true? It's gotten to be a problem. I've noticed some people have been turned off by the

vulgarity. It's interesting. It ends right now. Oh, wow. Okay, wait. It is why I try to cut out a lot of the vulgarity. And then I don't listen to the show and I just feel like it's there the whole time. Yeah. So I keep doing it. So they're like, oh, you know, she says like, where are we? And he just goes, India.

And she's like, well, how do you know that? And here's this old timer, an Indian fella here. This is the Indian actor, D.R. Nana Yakara, who was actually a pretty prolific Indian actor in like the 40s all the way up through the 70s. And then he was in Temple of Doom. but this dude is like sort of pointing them like oh you know

right this way to the village and this is where we get what turns out to be like the surprise mission of this movie Indiana Jones being asked to recover the sacred stone from this village that has been stolen by the high society folks in the palace

and as such they believe that you know crops are dying waters in rivers are drying up and oh by the way they stole all the children from the village way to bury the lead dude they bury that lead so much that it's like yeah and then all the you know the crops

failed the animals died and eventually one night there was a fire in the field and the men went out there to put out the fire and then yeah you know they noticed the children were gone and the children are all gone and this is all to be blamed on the new Maharaja

at Pankot Palace yes who we get to me is a child it's a big reveal but we're also getting this exposition while you know Billy and Willie I did that

oh Bill and this food's terrible Allison Billy Campbell from not oh no wait not no no to no Melrove plates I forgot the words to this anything done I hate being wet

that's why I never shower right Allison loop tonight. And absolutely, I will absolutely make out with a 19-85 Harrison Ford. That's where fucking sure. Holy sure. Hey, you're like I. You only live once, dude. But no, this is when she is

being served food and she won't eat it and it's kind of great. I love this Harrison Ford. It's like, you're embarrassing, you're embarrassing me and insulting them. Is more they eat the weak. And she's like, oh, you can have it. It's like, uh, the give back of the food is worse than the EU towards the food. Because it's like, and like,

you know, what, and look, this part, at least, it's like we're talking about, you know, the poverty we're talking about, and like that the food is totally probably edible and fine. Like, Harrison Ford is eating it and he's enjoying it. She's just being like kind of shorty's chowing down. Yeah, she's just being a baby about it. I have to give it a pass because the food does not look like something the cryptkeeper is eating. That alone, I'm like, it's fine. It's probably like food.

It looks like beans and rice or something. Yeah, it's probably like lentils with some sort of like stew. And, you know, the funny thing is I was genuinely shocked. I was thinking about this. I'm always shocked because I don't watch this movie a lot. So, you know, it's usually the time apart. I forget stuff about it. I always am shocked that she doesn't go, like, what, no silverware?

Like, you just assume that's going to happen. So, yeah, the dude sort of is explaining here. They've taken chivalanga, which is this sacred stone that protects the village. there's a really cool moment here I like this very it's kind of funny because Spielberg says there wasn't he feels like there wasn't a lot of him in the movie

but there's a reference to another Spielberg movie right here because Indy is listening to this guy and he sort of like tense his fingers and like pensively looks at him and Shorty does the same thing he mirrors him just like the son does to Roy Scheider and Johns which I thought was kind of neat

yeah this part of the movie the fortune and glory aspect of this Indiana Jones character always is puzzling to me it doesn't fit the character at all this one right here like in this movie because it's pro bono right

but he wants to make money off this specifically it's not about going to the museum it's like fortune and glory that's because when this little kids are like they do that it's night time we find out the kids are missing oh my god so scary oh is this one this poor kid like Rajit or whatever Does this kid die? You don't know, but he comes in and he's in rough shape.

He feints. He gives Indiana Jones this like scroll and he looks at it. He's like, holy shit, this is, this is amazing. Oh, man, I'm going to make so much fucking thank you, little dead kid. Now he's the wolf drooling. Yes, exactly. I almost mean more of it in a way because the way that he's just like, yeah, it's just I got the village back together.

It just doesn't seem like the character we were presenting. Senate and Raiders. Oh, the young boy died. Well, oh, God, I feel so, you know, this is partly my responsibility. Short round, you dig a grave for the young man. You know what? It's the least we can do. Also, check his pockets for artifacts. This scroll is worth a lot. He might have had some other stuff in there. And the scroll depicts Callie or whatever. And then we get into this whole the thuggy cult, which apparently did exist in history, but it was apparently more so, it was sort of like the hell's angels. It's like, it's like, here's some scary fucking shit we could put on Azar emblem. And apparently they were, you know, some of them were followers of Cali. Some of them

were Muslim. They're multiple types of people. And they were mostly just highwaymen and bandits. It doesn't sound like it was as necessarily as much black magic and ritual sacrifice. It sounds like the British painted them that way as a way to clear it out. And this movie full on just like puts in like, you know, fucking Hawaiian shit. They put in like, Like, I mean, really? That's what I read. Like, there's like Hawaiian stuff. I'm sure.

There's the European stuff. And like in the iconography and like how did they're presented and what they're doing and the sacrifices and all that stuff. It's just a super othering. Yes. I'm sure that's like I'm sure I there is something like this. But it did strike me as weird that there's a fucking voodoo doll in this. Yeah. Exactly.

The vood is. Okay. Yeah. That's that's kind of odd. Like, wait. It's just everything that is not holy and white. Yeah. India, Haiti, same difference.

They're right next to each other. All a bunch of eyeball eaters. You know this. They all know this. So, yeah, I do like, there's actually a really nice shot. Speaking of the nice Matt paintings in the movie, there's this cool shot where Indy's sort of standing on a hill, you know, sort of outside the village and Shorty comes up to talk to him. And what you're seeing, like, of the village is a nice mat.

And this is where he's like, hey, you know, that rock he's talking about, think it might be one of the Sancarus stones. And, you know, this is, you know, where it's like, well, what's that, Dr. Jones and fortunate and glory kid. And it cuts to the next day. We're going out to Pancock Palace. We are being guided by some dudes who have some elephants for them to ride on. And oh my God, guys, can you even believe it?

Willie Scott just can't get on this elephant. She just can't get on that elephant. Something else to scream about. And uncles across the nation are slamming their knees. Oh, sure. Until it's red and painful. Like, just like, Ha!

Ha! Ha! ha! Ha! ha! ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! ha! Oh, it's even better. She's trying to put perfume on an elephant. I can't even believe it. Dude. And I love this elephant's like, you know what? Fuck you. And knocks her off. If you're going to have just keeled over and died immediately. Like, she was for a few of it. There's all these chemicals. It's 1935. 35. Who the fuck knows what's in it? I'll tell you what I'm going to we're going to see it again. Of course we're seeing it again.

But I'm getting a t-shirt that says the elephant for president when we go and see it for the second time. And that's how you know, Reagan won real election. That's right. She has a, she has some obnoxious line too about like, I can't

believe I'm going to this palace. I got to call my agent. She had, dude, this is another bad one. she looks back to like the people in this village and it's like is there a phone anywhere god you're so so ignorant it's awesome and frustrating how ignorant you are and again she's a woman that's presumably from like wherever montana wherever the fuck she says uh oh well i'm going back to missouri missouri yeah my grandfather to shanghai she's a world traveler like fucking read the room lady

yeah just steve be fair just because she's done all that does not mean she has encountered mud that does not that does not necessarily equal equal there old mazoo has some mud I think I'd rather be in India but yeah

better food for sure yeah yeah yeah but yeah she's just fetching about like I've gone to all the best restaurants riding in limos and now I'm on a

smell of fit it's just fucking horrible she's got some line where she's like, oh, look at those big birds. And I love Indiana right here. He's like, those aren't big birds, sweetheart, the giant vampire bats. Ooh, Indiana Jones versus Dracula. I mean, I would watch.

How about that's a movie? Go to Pennsylvania. Exactly. Get Dracula's ashes. Who knows what's going to happen. Everything is real. The vampires are real. Please, Eric, in this India, vampires are in India,

werewolves are India. There's monsters in the wall. everywhere swamping also in India. I guess that's the thing is India's got it all doesn't yeah all monsters that you've got can be fed and shown in India. The thesis of this film

anything goes? I wish I mean you might as well do it because you're not taking anything from history or reality. Moloram should just ride a giant bat. That'd be kind of cool. That's what my one thought was like if you are really going to like 1941 I

at least give a pass because it is so cartoonish. And like if you push this. The year or the movie? The movie. The year was pretty brutal. Year was pretty brutal. I will say that. Oh, you know what? 1941. I'm not putting Stephen Spielberg on 1941. Right. I don't think he had anything to do with it really. I don't even know that he was born yet. Probably not. But that is a bad movie. It is also bad. But has its moments. It has its moments. But outside of those moments, it's virtually unwatchable. I just like this one, like, I feel like if it was like bloodier, if it was. really crazy and zany maybe it matches like if everything is up to 11 maybe i understand it like

old cartoons that nobody watches anymore that have pretty bad imagery but are cool to watch because i guess that's what the that's what the dinner scene is supposed to be this big cartoonish set piece like that's a big joke but it doesn't but you're making these people a joke well yes you are making the people a joke and the rest of the movie is so sincere right that it doesn't make any sense because it's not even it's not even just a joke it functions it functions as terror as well it's like a horror scene a lot of i mean that's even there was the other spielberg quote where he was like the movie sort of out poultered poultergeist like and it's like intense presentation of imagery you know it is a lot of it is very horrific i mean even the chilled monkey brains like the sounds that they put there you know like whatever's on the soundtrack it's

supposed to make you feel scared that you're looking at this. And you know what? I mean, compliments to what Ben, Ben Burt, who did the sound on Star Wars and this. I think actually for the tunnel scene with the mine cars, he actually filmed roller coasters at Disneyland and stuff, did a lot of fully work. That's pretty cool. Very, it's very effective. But it's not good. That seems is not good. We outpulture, poldergeist. We also outracist did it. We were trying to for years and finally we got there. We haven't out racist poltergeish too if you could believe it. Oh yeah, that's an achievement.

But Rochette and Seth who plays the guy who we're about to meet the prime minister Oh, chatter, lull. Who talked about the banquet scene after the controversy. He's like, Stephen intended it as a joke. The joke being that Indians were so smart that they knew all Westerners think that Indians eat cockroaches.

So they serve them what they expected. The joke was too subtle for that film. Incorrect. It's totally correct because you have a lot of fucking Indian dudes at this table. Deliciousious. The dude's like, oh, when they have the part where it's like you got to eat the scarab, like it's a fucking

steamed artichoke. He like pulls the part off and slurps it down and he's like, yum, yum, yum, what? You're not hungry? That dude's loving it. He's not making fun of her. No, the other big fat guy next to him is like, oh, this is the best part. That dude's putting two eels in his mouth at the same time, like

some sort of double suck video. No, no, no, it didn't suck. It was a joke that only I knew about. it's don't you understand that's always when when someone says something shitty and they get called out on or they do something shitty they get called out on at the fucking most pathetic thing I was just joking no you weren't no you weren't I mean I think this movie is a joke but the joke is like let's take it to it this is what nobody knows what Indian people eat why they eat snakes and bugs and fucking well all right so let me correct that maybe you thought you were joking but there's nary a fucking joke to be found maybe the idea initially was like okay we're going to go to the the jungle primeval and it's going to be crazy this then the other thing but it's like but you're setting it in a real place. Yes. Real people with real customs with real food with real food which exists. Most of the food would be probably vegetarian anyway and it would probably be fucking great. Oh yeah. Absolutely. Yeah. Absolutely. Yeah. Don't even worry about that.

Especially this palace of course. So we do get to Pankat Palace and here's Chatter-Lall and this is the funny he's he's like oh you clearly don't look like you're supposed to be here and he's like Oh, yeah. Indiana Jones. And he's just like, oh, the world's preeminent. You know, Arte deL just like, yeah, all right. Chatterlal gets, you know, fucking Time Life magazine or. He says something where it's like, oh, you know, where in the world, I don't know

where in the world you three would look like you belong, which is kind of funny. Which is good, yeah. We also meet Captain Blumkin or Blumber. And as Steve pointed out, this is the dude that played Grady and the Shining. Oh, yeah, yeah. I love that. Well, you want more of that guy in this movie. He will correct all of the people.

Yes. I mean, I would love him more in this movie. He's in this dinner scene briefly. He, like, flicks some eels or no, snake babies away from him and stuff. And then he's talking to Indiana Jones about the history of the thuggy cult. Yes. And it's like, oh, yeah, this is all old wives tales, et cetera, et cetera. And again, like, this is like, and the colonial is right.

It's just so fucking crazy that this is. this guy is the voice of reason because he's the white guy. Yeah, it's kind of nuts. You know what would be great is if you know, this dude, whatever, you know, Major Blumpkin, you know, he has his dinner scene.

And then like later on when they're like farting around and all of the subterranean shit in this movie, you think you're watching Chud for a few minutes. So much time we spend in the basement and the sewers and caves and whatever. But it would be great if this dude met the same fate as Alfred Molina

in Raiders where it's like all of a sudden Indy turns a corner and there's this dude's dead puppet body for some reason. Because what this is all set up once we get to Pancock Palace, the way a lot of this plays out, this might sound a little weird, but it's the best example I can come up with off the top of my head is House of the

Devil where it's like someone goes into a place and like everything's pretty normal but something seems kind of off. One thing leads to another. Exactly, dude. They're also listening to the fix in 1935. I would love that.

You know, that kind of like something's up in this house. And like, you could so play that better if like we spent more time in the actual palace and it was like, that's a good point. Here's your weird Indiana Jones haunted house shit. Lucas wanted the haunted castle for crusade. Yeah. I would prefer that, honestly, to this. Make that the temple of doom.

The castle of doom. What's the hell? I do think the temple itself is it's a morass. It just sort of slows the movie down. It does. After the bug scene, it's just like dark cavern after dark cavern after dark cavern. Yeah, you just keep going deeper into the earth. He's going to be fighting mole people.

Oh, dude, definite. Look out, Willie. It's the mole man. I will not give you back your ambulance. Dig, Willie. We've got to dig our way out. Oh, look at this. It's Indiana Jones.

The world's most preeminent archaeologist. Oh, you get, you get a vogue. down here, interesting. Yes, it was a very interesting if divisive interview the game. It's rare that Borg had a centerfold that month. Yeah, so they could photograph all

on my whip, if you know what I mean. I don't know why they complain about Speedos. Feel pretty good to me. I can't tell you. So we got this thing, of course, Willie Scott, just she's looking for a man. She's looking for a reason to be in this movie because now it's like, oh, what's her new motivation in the seat? Money.

She even does. Because she asked this dude law like, so what does the Maharaja's wife think about all this? And he's like, oh, the Maharaja's yet to choose a wife. And she's like, well, say, all the sudden he turns a fucking Fran Dresher from the nanny. This is also just to get them titties out. Because the rest of this movie,

them titties are out. They are out and open for business. Not fully, folks. No, I mean, we're not seeing any nip slippage or anything. Just saying, don't buy Checking Miss. I mean, for most of Raiders, Karen Allen's wearing like a button-up shirt or, you know, there's the one part where she's got like the dress on,

but even that's like up to the up to the neck. This is a dipped outfit here. But it's great because when it's like, now may I present his royal highness the Maharajan, like this little boy walks out and she's like, oh, damn it. Oh, no, it's just another figurehead leader. Oh, well, I could be convinced.

let's see What are the ages of consent here, Indy? I mean, we don't have to consummate immediately, right? We can wait them out. Well, Willie, the age of consent in United States in 1935 is three. So it's fine. Yeah, he sort of, Indy sort of gets into a contentious conversation with Lahl here about whether or not the thuggy cult is still around. It's like, oh, no, they haven't been around for a century.

And he's like, well, these dudes in the village told them. this whole thing about ancient stone being stolen and blah, blah, blah. And this is where he gets into like, you know, oh, Dr. Jones, well, you know, stories, you know, whatever he says, but it's like, this is where he's like, didn't a newspaper in Honduras call you a grave robber? And then the other one, which I love is he's like,

and didn't someone in Madagascar threatened to cut off your dick? Well, it's like, cut off your hands. It's like, wasn't my hand. It was my fucking, I was my mistake. That's what it was. My greatest weapon. Listen, the thing is, my penis was too wide, you see,

and that caused a bit of a problem. A wide guy, classic wide guy. You see, Dr. Jones, we have much more to worry about here in pinka cows besides ghosts and goblins. But, yeah, the monkey brains are happening, not the other. This is just, it's too much. Honestly, you want to do some big pulpy trash. gross out. We're reading a comic book from 1925. You know,

you have a snake surprise or something. Don't do five snakes surprises. It's like all the courses have to be equally horrific. Eyeball stew is a bit. I honestly, they were asking for soup. Hey, Mulletani, would love some. Dude, haven't forbidden we get a bowl

of Mulletotani in this movie. I might have eaten around those eyeballs, but yeah. Then the eyeballs, it's just like well, you know, the eyeballs were gross, but the broth was fine. The eyeballs actually give the flavor, you see? You're not supposed to eat them. These are human eyeballs, right?

I would feel bad if these were a pig eyeball. It's like bay leaves. You just got to work around them. You're not supposed to eat it. It is weird. And it's only in the service of the, quote, entertainment here is she asks, like, do you have something a little more low-key, like a soup? And when the dude delivers the soup, she opens it up. And at first, it's just the broth, like, ah, soup.

And then one by one, these eyeballs pop up. I was like, that's not how that would work. No. Unless you're bringing it to the boil right at the table. Oh, table side. I'm all soup prepared. And while they're looking at their soup and about to faint, everybody else is secretly eating the real food. Because this is all joke food.

They're not doing it. So please stop complaining about me. We were just joking. It's just too. It's the worst part of the movie. Hey, Stephen, last night I went to this Indian restaurant. And I mean, like, I didn't to eat any of the food, but I was like, what is that? A bunch of snakes? But then my bitch wife was like, no, it's delicious chicken Korma. And I'm like, no, it's a bunch of snakes. Then I was like, we're getting divorced, you fucking snake. You're a snake. How about

that? And I ain't going to eat you no more. Enjoy your eyeballs stew or whatever. This menu makes no sense of Vindaloo. That's a kind of snake, isn't it? Oh, yeah, yeah, it's potatoes in the sauce. No, it's eyeballs in the sauce. We all know this. Yeah, yeah, Vindaloo. Like some sort of Sith warlord Oh god damn You know you know there's going to be a Darth Vindaloo coming up Oh Darth Horma Darth Vindaloo

I'm getting hungry So yes it's the A few minutes after the horrendous dinner scene We're like getting ready to retire for the night Indy has a tray of fruit Like here you go you fucking moron I'm an apple and whatever

And then it's like this really quick, like, we might be fucking a Pankat Palace. But indeed, the apple's full of bupah bugs. It's just, it's an Indian apple. It's got to be full of bugs. And even the fruit is full of bugs. Yeah, oh yeah. The grapes have a bunch of teeth in them for some reason.

I don't know. It's India. It's all crazy here. God, it's awful. But no, I mean, like, this is the only movie. He doesn't fuck in this movie. He does not fuck. The dick remains dry the entire time.

It's pathetic because he keeps on, this is a scene where he's just like, I just want you to know, I fuck a lot. Okay? Listen to me right now. I fuck a lot. He's about to fuck her that he's like, you know, we'll see how good you do, lady. You're going to give you a grade. And then she kicks him out.

And this is the thing where she's like, you're going to be, you know what? They are both incredibly hot. So it's like, you're going to be back in five minutes. It's like, all right, I'm going to set my clock. And then Indy retires to his court. He's like, no, you're going to come to me in five minutes. And he fully expects her. to come to his chamber.

I know where this is going. And you know who's sleeping but three feet away? A short round is in that room. Dude, he's the worst college roommate of all time. Yeah, listen, listen, Willie, you can come to my room. I'm going to fall your brains out, right? But listen, my roommate's in there sleeping. He's a real, well, he's a child.

He's an adult. We got to be real quieter than if he was of age, you know what I mean? If he does see it accounts as a biology credit, and I'm kind of homeschooling him. No, I'm trying. The radio won't get any louder. I don't know how we're, I think we're fucked on this one. This, yeah, this seems ridiculous, but it does, I do like the payoff of, okay, so there's an assassin that's hiding in his room that tries to kill him.

Good whip action, good hanging this guy from the ceiling fan. And I do like him walking into her room and just like, as if she doesn't exist. Yes, I think that's a good comedic moment between the two of them. She's got a great little line here, though, where she goes, Before all that, he goes, oh, do you, you always sleep in your jewels? And she goes, my jewels and nothing else. And I was like, that's good imagery. Sure.

That's totally great. I do like the little detail here, too, when he goes back into his room, you see a quick shot of Shorty, like, sleeping on a couch. He's sleeping exactly like Indy does with the hat over his eyes. Keep that hat on, Shorty. Yeah, you know what? Pull it down over your ears, if you know what I mean. Willie, this is the one time you can't scream. That's why I let him sleep with the hat on, you see.

That way I know he can't see nothing. Now, we got cotton swabs. We're going to put this in your ear here, buddy. You're not going to be here or nothing. So, yeah, he is looking through a room, and I love he discovers this, like, statue with rocking tits and puts his hand. And it's a really good, she's like, I'm right here. Like, she grabs her chest, pretty funny.

And he pushes the wall through. and this begins our subterranean adventure with Indiana which I mean I love this I like the start of the movie I don't like the palace this is an improvement over the palace because this is like the bug stuff sucks no no never mind the bug stuff afterwards once we get to child slavery

I sit up in my seat a little more I get snoozy during child slavery honestly yeah I mean I don't necessarily like it there's a lot I don't like about this movie but when we start actually fighting these guys Sure, yeah. And running around underground, I think it's a lot more compelling than the bugs or the dinner. Well, the, the bugs just remind me of like snakes on the floor.

Yes, that's your, you know, it does a great idea. It just feels like a little too much. Yeah, it's a lot. Just slightly too much. Because, yeah, she, he and Shorty go through. And they have, again, him and him and Kihei Kuan have great chemistry. And they're like, I love them arguing. It's like, you just, you know, lean against the wall.

You told me to lean against the wall. You told me to lean against the wall. like that whole thing. This is your fault. You told me to do it. Oh, yeah. It's so, so good. When they're doing the card game, that's... Oh, the card game. We talked about the card game. It was so great. Oh, right. Yeah. When they, when they camp, they're playing poker and they're, they're both cheating or something. You know, just the argument. It's fucking great. Meanwhile, Willie's screaming through that

entire scene. Yep. I think that's kind of why we all subconsciously just skipped it and kept Yeah. I mean, we already talked about her screaming. So that was the scene. But there's more screaming to come, Eric, because she has to go through the bugs as well. She screams at every single animal in that camping scene And it even ends on an owl I'm like, why are you screaming at an owl? Why are you screaming at an owl? Who are you?

Are you a small mouse? Like, don't worry about it. Are you shot? It's not going to pick you up by your neck and eat you later. Yeah, so they get trapped in this cool room where very, man, George Lucas loves creating stories where shit is closing on you in a room. And then they get into another classic murder. room, which every

ancient society made murder rooms. And he's like Willie, turn off the garbage manual and the garbage compactor. He's saying it. It is very garbage compactor in here, complete with spikes from the floor and ceiling, which is really

nice. And he has to like beg this woman to reach her hand into the box and take the fucking Lady Jessica test with the pain hand. Oh, no, that's dude. Excuse me. No, it's like, you gotta pull the other lever there. And like Harrison Ford does like stick his,

it's kind of a funny shot. He's like sticking his face in this little square. But like Indiana Jones has to yell like, we're going to die, please. I know bugs are terrible, but just deal with it. I don't know Indiana. Okay. Oh, oh, it's living. Oh, ew. Oh, ew.

Okay. Hit the lever. Oh, oh, there we go, Indy. Thank you, Aliphon. I mean, Indiana. It's kind of funny gag here when she gets in there. and then she sets it off immediately. Does it again, which is pretty cool. But Shorty has the foresight to be like,

that other door came down the last time. Let's run through. It's a great grab as the hat at the last second. I think, like, depending upon how they decide to end this dial of destiny, you know, maybe he's six feet under. I don't know. But if he doesn't, there should just be a postscript that's like, and Indy went on many adventures after that.

And his last one was he died because he stuck his arm back through something. that was closing to get his lucky hat and it killed him. Like, we all say, like, we worry Tom Cruise is going to die doing a stunt on set somewhere. That's what would happen to Indiana Jones. You went back for that hat one too many times and a huge rock mill. I'm not worried

about that, to be clear. I hope that happens to Tom Cruise, because I think that's how he actually wants to go out. I think that would make him the most happy. Well, I've always thought that that's, he can't actually like actively leave Scientology because they got too much on him. Yeah. So that's

why he keeps doing this because he's like, hey, the bigger it gets, eventually I will kill myself and be with Shelley Miscavage in heaven. That's right. You see, folks, we said it. Scientology is a bad thing. It's a bad thing. So it's all religion. I think the thuggies show us this. They're very clear

on the subject era. Interesting. Just keep on trying to do all that shit that Jackie Chan was trying to do in the 80s. I'm sure you'll die. Yes. Who are these religions not so hot? Maybe that's what, maybe the dial of destiny, which is a smokescreen. We got to find Elron Hubbard's lost

manuscript. The Dianetics, it's real. It's all true. Boy, would my face be red. Here's a prediction, dialed destiny. Because this is going to be the last one, right? Yeah.

It's got to be the last. Well, it's got to be a for it. It's going to end. He's going to, now this, this might not happen. Maybe egg on my face, but I did predict, I did predict Fast X's ending. So he's going to use time travel. We're going to see a young indie back in the prime of his life.

Yeah. And that'll be the ending. He goes back in time. He gets to live again. Oh, it was sort of like a Steve Rogers situation. Yeah. Do it all over. Yeah. I'm going to go back in time and fucking kill Willie Scott. I'm going to spread syphilis even faster than I did before. I'm going to do what I should have always done. I'm going to marry Marion when she was 16 and we were in love. But then I had to kill my other self. It really complicated things. Yeah. So we, this is where we. This is where we. open up into the big cavern. This is the big Kalimash, you know, this is not Kalimash

Shakti Day. This is just Kalimah. This is first part here. I got to tell you, as far as sacrifice scenes go, fellas, this is a hell of a sacrifice. Pretty good. I mean, like, as mustache twirley and like, you know, what do you call it there? Hodgepodge, uh, in terms of accuracy. Amrish Puri is really good in this movie. Yep. As Malaram. He's a, he was another super

successful Indian actor. He's like 450 movies. or something like that. Crazy's thing about this dude's career though was like you know, big filmmaking industry in India in, you know, starting in like the 40s or so. Sometime in the 50s, like he was doing a studio audition and they were like, nah,

you're never going to be an actor. And then he somehow, like he bombed some audition or whatever it was. And then he somehow found away, like he got cast as a villain or something. And then he became like famous in India for playing villain after villain after villain. Pretty cool. He does it really great here.

He picks up the tone and what we're doing here. And he runs with it, this pulpy trash. Mola Rahm is his character. And he's good and this sacrifice is good. I like the heart rip obviously left the impression on me as a child. The death cage is a nice touch. I think they must have like, you must have really put money. And it's a smart thing to do.

Put money into your death cage. So it doesn't melt. Yes. Because you're going to replace it every time. That's really expensive. You have to put the money into the first. one and make it a real death cage. All right. So I'm installing your sacrifice here.

Your sacrifice altar. And now we got the death cage here and the the chains. We're going to install them up there to come down. Now, you already, you're already figuring it out, right? You got a literal port of the hell below there. That's all set up. Excellent. That's a different guy. I don't do that. Yeah, I can't do. I did that once I got out of that game. There's no money in that game. I don't do plumbing. But I'm going to cut you deal just in case there's a backup for extra torture. cages. They're off on the side. Replace them. No extra charge.

I'll let me tell you're not going to need them. But if you need them, there they are. You paid for the platinum or as what you called triple platinum, which doesn't exist. But you had extra, so we made just some extra who are you going to be sacrificed? Oh, uh, Tim Burton looking guys. Got it. Okay, got it.

So I was hearing around here, you got something called Kalamari Shakti Day. I love seafood. We get some, uh, Kali Ma Shakti Day for the table, please. My brother saw this movie in theater. So 84, he was like, he would have been four or five years old. My parents brought him. And this goes to the PG rating at this part of the scene

when the heart gets ripped and he rips it out and he's holding it. It's still beating. He turns to my mother's like, you take a child to see this movie. Literally, turned to her as like, you take a child to see this movie. He had the heat that early day. Oh, yeah. He do is going on. funny. And you know what? He was better for

it too. I think kids need to see some heart rips. We need to see some heart rips. And then after the heart is ripped, that chest just heals itself back up. Ooh, fuck. And he goes down into the pit. And I love the detail of the heart bursting in the flames when the body hits the lava. That's pretty cool. I love

the idea that like for a moment you forget that you're also going to be burned like like you survived the heart ripping. You're like, ooh, now getting the, oh right, I'm burned alive. Well, see that this guy, he was just making a snake And the guy asked for it medium rare But he served at rare

So he'd get sacrificed Yeah, that makes sense. Yep. Oh, looks like it's the death pit for you. That was undercooked. And so he, this dude takes out these three stones, one of which is one of the ones that was stolen from the village. And I love this dude pulls these stones out of this bag

And the crowd goes wild. Like the crowd that's there for the sacrifice. Love a good audience for a public sacrifice. Well, of course, those are the Sarkara stones, and you need those to play the game. If we're going to have a game here, we have to have all the Scareer stones. And he puts them into, it's like two eyeballs and a nose. It kind of looks like he's making a big scary jackalander. Sure.

It's pretty nice. Great Halloween decoration for sure. Definitely. Oh, yes. And then it's a weird, like, they watch the sacrifice happen. And like the three of them are up there in the corner, like in the raft. is being horrified. No post game. No, no Shaq and Chuck to talk about the sacrifice after. Like, they go out of the court. Like, I don't know. He didn't need it.

Molleron didn't really have it tonight. His numbers are low this season. Yeah, I don't know how we're going to get a best of seven here, Chip. If he's pulling sacrifices like this each night. Coming up after the sacrifice, bug dinner, new show. Oh, go Indian kitchen nightmare. You know, usually you hear more screaming at these events And it turns We were just all drowned out by some woman off by the side Who just kept on screaming about nothing

Nothing that we could really understand Welcome back to Indiana Jones The Temple of Doom Chopped You have chicken Rice and lettuce How am I going to eat food out of this? There's no bugs, no snakes? Can I get an eyeball?

What about What the fuck? What was gonna eat this? Oh, secret ingredient Heartless Corpse. So it's weird because like they just wait for the arena to clear out.

And they look. It's one of those things like if you were ever like, you know, a little kid like sneaking out. You got to give it a 10 count, dude. You got to give your mom.

You know she's going to get up and go to the bathroom real quick. You got to give it a nice solid 10 minutes. I mean, they clear out of here so fast though. it's like, you know, when the Yankees are down by nine and it's the end of the game and people are leaving to beat the traffic, like, they get out before the heart explodes. Yeah, I mean, it's back then. I mean, you're probably getting at least halfway through

rock and roll part two playing on those speakers above before you get out of the, before you get out of there. Kalima, hey, shishakdi-day, yeah, al-imah, hey. You know, this song has a complicated legacy. actually the writer of this song is part of our tribe here Oh God Gary Jules

Is that that piece of shit? Gary glitter Gary glitter Anyway so Indy goes down there He's like I'm going to get the three stones Gets the three stones very easily Unlike the last time he took You know an idol looking thing off of something

This works out much better And then it's a weird like I think I You want to keep exploring this cave further for no reason. And he starts going and they're like, what is this guy doing? You know, I wasn't interested in first, but I should have

eaten more beetle. My stomach's really grungle. I should have had more beetle, a little more eyeball, me. He's going down there for more beetle. And yes, meanwhile, both Willie and Shorewood get kidnapped by the Tuggy cult. Yes, and this is, he comes out, and this is where he spies all of the child slavery

happening. And this is an impressive outfit to be. quite honest. I mean, like, he's got, it's a lot of kids. Yeah, a lot of kids. Pretty coordinated. You know, you're working well into the night. Yep. And, uh, I looked it up. Mad Max being under the Thundernome a year after this. Oh. It was giving me those vibes. It does. It always gives me those vibes when I watch this. Yeah. And Apple and Apple's, uh, offshore operations a couple years after that as well. That's right. Yeah. These, these kids were breaking these rocks now because they were trying to find

the last lost two sacred stones in it. Yeah. Those same kids now are breaking those rocks looking for the fucking materials that go into our phone exactly right see it horrifies me to see them break rocks for precious jewels or whatever but lithium and other things that are needed for my smartphone I'm like get fucking chop I need the dial on the

iPod is only you know only a little hand can take care of that and repair that but this is a real fucking weaner move by Indiana Jones like he sees what's going on and like rightfully you get a little upset about that he's very heated about it yeah but he just chucks a rock at this dude

And then doesn't even have the decency to hide? So dumb. What the fuck are you doing? I'm starting some shit. And this is when it's one magical thing too much. And it's always bothered me. I used to like this movie a lot. This used to be my favorite.

I used to watch the beginning all the time when I went to bed. You watch the good part. Yes, I'd put this on and go to sleep. I used to watch Return of the Jedi when I went to bed all the time. And I got through Jabba's palace and I'd fall asleep. That's yeah. So it was sort of similar. Exactly.

Exactly. Like basically about the raft happens up asleep. but and I always forget this happens to this movie and it's just evil zombie blood drink zombie blood drink Indiana Jones is just one thing too it is because it's evil ash from Evil Dead 2

or something you do you do you know Raiders has happened it's your second movie this is your yes and so yes you can't increase the magic but not this much I always took this as because otherwise you kind of have to assume these guards are killing

like just mowing down kids who revolt against dude where do you think they're getting the eyeballs for the soup Chris oh really that's why it's so good I have a feeling

we might be eating children it's veal of people it's true kids might be good the veal of people might be good the zombie thing doesn't really yeah it doesn't do it for me

I don't and then of course you cure it by holding a torch next to someone and then touching them with fine you get to burn the nipples yeah That brings back. Oh, my tech. Thanks, Shorty.

That brings back Indiana Jones. That brings back the Maharaja. Yes. I don't know. Rehabilitate these goddamn poor people that were forced to drink blood. Fucking flame these guys up. They don't have a soul. Yes, they specifically do not flame the prime minister who gets really ganked by that fucking, that ladder thing.

Right. The lever. Oh, when the steering wheel falls on them. Yeah. Your rib cage is getting crushed. He's a little guy, too. Here's the question, though, how, and they don't really explain it. I don't think unless I miss something, but like, how much of this is like, these are just the baddies that are part of the gang?

Yeah. Or have they been, there's a brief line that it's like they make, then you'll be like them and you will be living in an unwaking nightmare. Yes. So presumably all these people were forced to become. Got it. Foot soldiers. I mean, maybe there's some. Some real heads out there.

Yeah. A black sleep. It's these two kids in the cage with. Right. A short round. And they are like, it's a waking nightmare. You drink the blood. You go into the black sleep, which to me, it sounds like you turn into a zombie. You have no soul anymore. So I don't know how like you get all the end. You're spoiler. The fucking kids all are brought back to the and you're just like they're all gone. Like what are you going to do? Like, well, they're going to set up. Here's the thing. It's like you're going to get a little torch to your tit. And then you're going to get a bath and you're going to get a meal and then you're going to bed. Just a little. sticks there's like yeah that's all you need them back there we go I think I may have read that there was an earlier draft that really did more zombie stuff than we have here that survived capital Z zombie monster stuff yes yeah I'm glad that was chopped at least something was chopped but like because it's just it's one thing too many like there's a way in which this second

and a half act can go where indeed doesn't have to turn into an evil guy although it gets it gets that shirt off, to be fair. The shirt does come off. Pretty nice. Pretty nice. Could have done it of his own agency. I don't know. Like, it's just because. But is it hotter that he was coerced?

Maybe to a certain faction. But like, to me, it's just ridiculous because I'm like, of course, Indiana Jones isn't going to be evil for the rest of the, like, this is just wasting time. Well, the problem is you so, you so like don't want to believe how ridiculous it is that you spend at least I kind of did. I remember the first time watching it being like, well, he's faking it the whole time. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

You know what I mean? Possibly. But it's not, though. No, this movie tells you that that drink works and does this to you, which is a fridge too far, one might say. Yeah. Do you think once he drinks from the Holy Grail in the next movie, it kind of like, oh, it gets that collie shit out of my body.

Oh, my God, I took a real rocking shit. All the collie blood juice finally came out of my calling. I can enter the kingdom of heaven after this. God, I'm going to have to get some diner food and a domino's pizza to soak up all the collie ma's shit. I got to say when he gets, when he has to drink the blood juice

or whatever, they put him in that like nice, a this like Madonna sexy bedroom with all the candles all over it. And he starts me like, it's a dark, it's like that's me on tour when I eat too late and then I try and go to sleep and it's like four o'clock in the morning. Why the fuck did you have McDonald's like, ha, ha, ha, oh, absolutely.

Knocking candles over, retching. Me just fucking vomit. into a paper taco bell bag. Yeah, he was, it wasn't a blood cocktail he was being fed. It was a milkshake and most of a happy meal. They made me eat the toy. It was the penguin and he was in a little car. Oh, man.

Yeah, so this is, this is where, you know, it's explained in sort of the vaguest, like, more power kind of way. you know, he's, Ram is like, yes, and if we collect all these five stones, two of which were thrown down in those minds, and that's what the kids are doing, by the way. Once we have all five together, we will have the power, and all of the religions will fall, and the Jewish God will fall out of the sky, and the Hindus will collapse,

and the Christian God will be thrown into obscurity, and the thuggies will rule the day for what and for whine? Oh, wait, hold on. I don't hear digging out there! You know, you try to explain your evil plot And they think it's break time I mean they're supposed to have no souls You know what a no soul individual would do

Keep working Yeah And this is where you see The Maharaj has got this pseudo voodoo doll thing And he's like burning Indy's face with it And parts And you're just like This is speaking of fridge is too far

It's just so stupid Like there's so much going on at this part Where you're like Can we just end the movie? Like I was like I've forgotten why I like this movie and like to your point just pick a magic and stick with it

that's was the strength of three and one one big magical moment is fine and that's it yeah so they bring out Willie right here Willie is going to be the next one to take the death plunge to hell and it's a great like we're gonna make Indiana do it

everything and you know she more screaming here thank goodness it's been so many minutes since I heard screaming Well, this is the woman who screamed wolf. At this point, I'm like, you were screaming out the bugs. I'm not going to think this lava pit is so bad down there. I think this is fine. Oh, I think she's just saying hello to us, short round.

That's just, that's her custom, you see? But the short round does get put in the minds really quick. And quickly, it's just like, I don't fuck this, it leaves. They are putting this kid to work so fast. And I love that they allow him to keep the baseball hat. Sure, yeah. It is great. Like, the dude.

is, he actually is doing like, I don't hear digging like with him. And it's like Kihei Kwan like, oh, sorry. And he's just like clink, clink, like taking this little pickaxe and gently pretending that he's doing anything. But he escapes around here. Cool little moment here of him

doing his own, you know, like Indiana Jones cunning kind of escape stuff. He climbs up this ladder. This dude follows him up it. And then he jumps and pushes the ladder over to get to a rope and he escapes. And he pops up right on the sacrifice. platform. Wouldn't you know it? Yeah. And this is this is kind of great. It's just, you

know, Shorty trying to do his best to get Indy to snap out. And like, you know, Key's doing a lot of great stuff here with just the delivery of like, Indy, I love you. You're my best friend. Come on. It's me. You know, it's really great. And he does. He finally just singes that nipple man. And Ford wakes up after after a pretty brutal backhand to Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Steve. Steve, please. you got to let me have one. Just one, five across the eyes for this little guy. Just once, please.

Yeah, it wasn't even, it wasn't even Colley telling him to do it. It was just 1935. Once a kid runs up to you, that's sort of what you did. You don't do that to adults. You don't run up on us. Oh my God, bring it back. But yeah, so this is, I'm all right kid. It's me.

And he winks at him. And then we break into a little Indiana Jums fight here. The two of them both kicking ass all. over. Indy definitely does like a suplex as a dude right off the cliff. He throws two to three people into the bells of hell, dude. These guys, you want to see it? Here it is.

It's pretty awesome. But Molaram, there's a weird, like, this was actually very bond to me. Oh, this Molyram's laying on the ground like, oh no, and like Indy goes to get him. He's like, ha ha. And just the trap door

flips open. Is Blowfeld escaping? What the fuck is this? Very true. And, yeah, this is when the prime minister gets his fucking ribs shattered. Oh, yeah. Just the thing that they are turning to lower the death crate into the lava pit or whatever falls on this guy. Like, Indy basically throws him under it to prevent it from falling so he can get Willie back up. Yeah.

Which is pretty great. And she's freaking out. And it's like, no, no, no, Willie, I'm fine. A short round burned my nuts. It's okay. It's me again. You know, I mean, you must have taken. and a half a second to be like, maybe

this letter and just be like, oh, it was a second too late. Oh, well, let's get out of here, Shorty. Shucks. Now, Shorty, I want you to take this here. Just start burning the children down there. That's how you're going to wake them up. I want you to burn all the children. Yeah, well, it looks like Willie fell in the pit to hell. Shorty,

this is a great lesson. I'll teach you right now. Learn the expression. There's plenty of fish in the sea. But she, yeah, she's saying. and they get out of there and this is we're gonna go back we gotta free all the kids and we're trying to do that and then like all the dudes run down we get another big Indiana Jones fight here

this is the big Indiana Jones fight with him and the other Pat Roach yet again now now in brown face God damn that sucks this might be the worst one though I think this versus get your face impaled by a motor

oh right right he gets like squeezed oh like okay yeah he gets like steam Roller in this. Oh yeah. The conveyor belt. You're referencing in Raiders when he gets thrown into the propeller of the airplane. He was also the guy with the sword that got shot, right? So he also kind of did brownface before. Is he the same guy? Maybe. I'll double. Yeah, I don't know. I mean, you could. I mean, I just, I'd never knew that. I knew him as propeller guy. In both cases, your funeral's going to be a brown bat. Yeah. It's not, you're not getting, I'm sorry. This is not

going to be. I think you are right, Steve, that this is the worst death to have because that propeller, he's dead instantly. Yes. This is like, I know I'm dying. I'm aware of my own death. Like, oh, there go my legs.

There goes my balls. There goes my stomach. And like, we are definitely doing a lot of squush, squash sound effects here. I mean, like, you don't get,

like, because in Raiders, he pops and you see like the blood splatter on the plane. There's no pops or like blood waves here. Just a smear. You just get the smear afterwards. Oh, yeah,

it is on the roly thing. I know. He played one of the guys that came in with the Gestapo in Nepal at the start. Okay. He played big Sherpa. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. I thought I had a flat ass before. Now I'm going to fit in the size 32 jeans.

But yeah, this is all great. This whole we're trying to, you know, I love when they free all the kids and like the kids run over all the guards. And there's one dude, one dude that gets taken down by a gaggle of kids. almost reminiscent of the dude getting taken down by the fire ants and Crystal Skilled. It's like all these kids swarm this guy and he falls down to the ground

like, no! And I was like, are they eating him? Some of these guards are getting Gaddafi for sure. Oh, definitely. Absolutely. You fuck with that many kids and now they're free. Absolutely. Yeah, we're having some fun with those guards. Playing soccer with your head about 15 fucking minutes. And then we get the really awesome I mean, say what you want about this movie, but the mind card

sequence I think is great. It's so much. It is great. There's so much going on with it. So much craft involved. The rear projection throughout it is really cool. Very harkens back. And the sound design, everything about it is really well done. I'm surprised they were able to jump over the bumblebee with spikes the first time. Usually that takes a couple of tries for me. And not only did they do that, dude, they captured the O letter on top the first try, which is really nuts. They were on their way to spell it out. Got to get the extra life there, Shorty. mean, it is impossible for me anyway

to play Donkey Kong country and not think of this movie. Of course. And vice versa frankly. Yeah. No, but in this movie, this movie really needs this though at this point. Because again, like, I've been bored for a little while. I mean, like, some of the findings good, but like... It's all been racism and lava.

Like, I can't... You got to give me something. There's an interesting thing that they sort of, I think, reference in Crystal Skull again, where they wind up getting on different tracks and they're riding side by side to one another and the guys try to steal Shorty out of the mine cart

and Shorty stuck between the two which is sort of what happens to mutt when they're racing and he's when he's doing the if it wasn't like CGI'd to hell the race and he's sword fighting Kate Blanchett on the two trucks

is kind of something but it's just CGI garbage that's the problem for me It's like, this at least has the handcrafted field. So much handcrafted shit, though. There's definitely, there's one part where they try to have this kind of like wide shot to show short round balancing between the two carts. And they cut to like stop motion figurines.

It's a split second shot. But the little figure that they use for short round looks like something out of a tool video or like a Tim Burton nightmare. It's just this like slender man looking piece of clay. It's a really weird shot that got left in. You're like, whoa, that's weird. But all of it's great. I love every time the dudes, you know, the bad guys in the cart hit something on the track and they go flying, including a dude that falls onto the tracks, gets hit by a cart and everybody goes over.

And, ooh, get killed. Willie Scott pushed that guy over. It's kind of the one time she participates in saving the day. Yeah. And murder. And meanwhile, back up, you know, Ram is like, well, all right, got to flush these fuckers out. And he makes what guards are left standing knock down this big water towers. All the water is flooding the tunnel, which is really great. We get, there's a dumb thing. And it's like, it's kind of whatever. But like, they're like, oh, here comes the water. We're running. We're running. And then there's like a side hallway. And they're like, ooh, let's get in here. And instead of like going through and continuing to run because water would fall into there. They're like, the water went that way, but we

drove that way. And I was like, that's a loony tune thing. Easy. Peezy. Yeah. Although when they do get to that opening and they start crawling out onto the ledge, they do what do what water would do is it's going to erode the whole fucking thing. Which is kind of cool. I always misremember this because like, why not? We fall off mountains

all the time in these movies. I just, I always misremember it as they get like shot out into the river. But yeah, it is kind of cool. It's like, oh, it's all turning to Mud. Oh, weird. But there's a bad because, like, what, yeah, whatever. It's, I get plot hole error, but, like, Indy yells

to short round and Willie, like, meet me at the bridge. And I'd just be like, we don't know where the fuck we are. What bridge? How do you know there's a bridge? Hong Kong, hong, plot hole. Meet me and Montauk. But, yeah,

so they sort of get out. I need a bunch of dudes shooting out of this water hall, dude. Yeah, let's, Some more murder. There's plenty coming because these gators get fed pretty well. Oh, it's fucking gator Thanksgiving. What I noticed, what I read about, I was like, I always thought the shots of those gators eating those guys felt a little cheap.

You know, it's like they're rolling around with robes and there's nothing really to it. Apparently it was a, you know, it was a B unit shot that they did way after they filmed the movie. Filmed in Florida real quick, cheap with alligators. And it just, it feels cheap. I want a little more gator action. Yeah, you got that spielbird coming here tomorrow, shoot some Indian movie, I guess. Spiel, what?

I'll let them use my gators. Go pay me for them gators. I can't let them use my water glasses, though. Well, thankfully, they sent someone else to do it. All right. How about this, though, dude? At least it's like real footage of animals. That's true.

I just hate that. it's just this one shot and we're seemingly repeating it constantly. It kind of feels like it's, you know, now we'll flip it. It's like, you know, like the Ed Wood like stock footage. We're just using over and over it. Yep. Wrap the raw ribs in the robe again.

Throw it back in. For what it's worth. These gators look like they're having a ball flopping around with the ropes. The henchmen get deaths here that are exactly the same as our main villain. And I wanted that main villain to have a little more of a death. We do see his fall, which is awesome.

Well, the thing is he gets on the bridge. And it's a great, it's a great sequence in terms of like Indiana Jones being like, we're all going to hell tonight. Yeah, sure. Everyone should see this coming because he's got the sword over the thing. He's fucking crazy. You know he's going to do it. And like, like, all right, everybody on the bridge.

Come on. Everybody, no, no, no, Malam. You stay on that side. You to me. Bring the rock to me. To your point is that I, when I was watching this today, I was just like, oh, he's putting them on the bridge because he knows. is he's going to do that. Hey, don't

cut the bridge because your your lady and kid are on the bridge now. I thought it was that measure. But then when he starts cutting the bridge and, and Malarama's just like, what? What are you talking about? You'd watch? He's been like, what? Exactly. It is a real, what did you

think was going to happen, Malarama? It's kind of crazy. Also, one good thing where Malarama calls his bluff there is just like, oh, I'm going to drop the stones. It's like, yeah, who cares? They'll fall in the water and we'll get them. Yeah. Hey, Shorty, you've made your peace with God, right? Because we're going there.

Willie, shut up. Here it comes. Did you guys notice, just real quick at the start of this, when Indy, like, gets to the bridge himself, they do a really lame Raiders joke. Oh, with the two guys. The two guys have swords. And it's like, whew, whish, whizh, ha, and then he reaches for the gun to shoot.

Like, you can't parody the I got to take a shit moment. Like, come on. It's just dumb. It's trying to remind you to watch an interesting. you had a fucking Jones movie. That's true. But yeah, this bridge sequence is Prepare to meet Kali.

Yes. He says something to Shorty in Mandarin. Yes, which is like, hey, I'm about to fucking do this shit, man. Which is, it's basically him not in English saying like, hey, Shorty, remember Nicaragua? Yes. You know, when we fell off that other rope bridge or whatever. So, yeah, I love this.

All these dudes fall in the water. And then it's, this is just the last big part here is just all the grass. apparently all named Robert Lee are eating up these dudes. Yeah, we had to go back and digitally remove all of the Confederate flag tattoos that they gave those gaiters.

It's tasteless. Just tasteless to have them out like that. Yeah, alligators, four crocodiles. Is that okay? Is that all right? Yeah, I guess that's fine. Yeah, all right.

You know, it's not as bad as... They're not the same, though, right? They're not exactly. There is a different. exactly the same. No, they're not. You know what? Geography. I'm going to say we should let it slide. All right. That's my opinion. I don't know. The bug

dinner was slightly worse. It was a little worse. Here's the thing. If we are incapable, which I know all four of us are of explaining what the difference is between the two animals, we should let it slide. I couldn't even tell you. I couldn't even, you know, I just read that today and I was offended.

There's a weird thing actually right before he cuts the bridge. Sorry to keep backing up here. But right before he cuts the bridge when he realizes what's happening and the dudes are coming around on both sides. Indiana Jones. And I don't know if it's because it's like it's 1984 we're making this movie or what. He's holding up this fucking sword

and he just goes, oh shit. Yeah. And I was like, does he say shit in the other movies? I don't think he does. No, I don't think this is the single instance of Indy like using profanity. It's fun. Well, when he's about to spit in God's face, I think it's okay. He spits in God's face in every movie. He says Jesus Christ

a lot. He blasphemeer. Blasphemeer. Blaspheme. You can't be blaspheming. For me. Blast for me, please. Yeah, so whatever. Ramamal falls in spectacular fashion. I love this effect shot. The camera's plummeting with him. Oh, dude, definitely we are

scraping that bald head on a rock. Oh, it's beautiful. Oh, God, it's so awesome. And then he climbs up. And yep, here's the Boys in Blue come in and save the day. The great British Empire, classifying those. Mumpkin return. See, would it not make sense that that dude is there? You know what I mean?

No, he's there. He's 100% there. I completely missed him this time around. It's fine. Because it's such a thing. And finally, the colonizers have saved its own. Sure. Yeah.

Indiana Jones should throw that guy off the cliff for good measure. Yeah. Hey, I'm supposed to be the only great white savior in this picture. Hey, Colonel Blumpkin, you want to see something funny? I don't go look down here. Wow. Hello, soldiers. Kill the bad ones.

Go ahead. Just do it for me, your master. The ones that look like you, you understand. Just another day in the empire, isn't it? It sure is. Oh, we've got to get this gold back to the UK to get some more crowns for the king. Oh, you know, I had all those people eat bugs and monkey brains. Can't wait to eat some steam porridge when I get out?

it's still somehow better than British food. Yeah, so we go back to the village and we bring all the children back. The day is saved. The dude from up top is like, you know, we already, we had a good vibe that you were coming back. We already knew. We're, you know, excited and everything.

And there's a, this is what, this is where it gets the most not Indiana Jones. And because this is like a prequel, I wonder what the turning point was here because this is where he's like you know, Billy says something about like, you know, what about all your like, you know, fame and glory or whatever, you know, you should have, I thought you were going to take that back.

And he goes, well, you know, I was just going to wind up collecting dust in the museum. And I was like, that's your whole, that's what you do. It's your life. Yeah. That's literally what you're doing. Doesn't really make sense. So I don't understand, like, what, whatever that turn.

I mean, oh, man. Oh, my God, Marcus, how much could I got for that stone? All right, that's the last time I leave something in a village. Well, I mean, I could put it in my amazing house that I never go to. Maybe it could collect us there. And, yeah, they start making out and all the kids from the village come up and thank him. Can we join in? Can we join in? This looks like fun.

I'd be asking that, seeing them. Yeah, it's kind of great Shorty's like, no more adventures with you, Dr. Jones. I was like, yeah, you should retire. Try going to school. How about that? Let's go back. You can go to school.

Maybe you get a free ride at the university. That'd be fun. You can go to thievery school, but it has to be a school. And that is Indiana Jones at the Temple of Doom. We'll go around the horn here. Final thoughts and recommendations, Mr. Siska. Yes, it's a light recommend for me. I mean, it's still more Indiana Jones, which is fun.

It's better than Crystal Skull. There's a lot of problems. Obviously, it's overtly racist in many parts. It's got a lot of problems, but it's got some good set pieces and some well-crafted scenes. So it's a light recommend. Christopher Cabin. Yeah, I mean, I guess if you haven't seen it before, sure, you got to see it. It isn't really necessarily, like, I don't think they reference it a lot in either of the other two that

happen after this. We'll see with destiny. No, I don't think the reference it at all. The return of Willie Scott. Yeah, maybe, but return of Blumkin. Yes. Is that guy still alive? No, he's got to be long. By now, maybe Muck killed him. I, I just, I, I, I, I, every time I watch this movie, I immediately forget it. Like, Steve said about, like, as a child, this one just immediately always, like, completely lost where Raiders, I literally can still, like, almost line for line go through that movie. Almost same with Last Crusade. I just find all this kind of like not that interesting. Like it's well crafted because it's Spielberg, but I don't find any of it

particularly engaging. Like I give the first scene and the car thing, but I'm like, that's bare minimum for this guy. Yeah. You know, if again, like if you're a completist and stuff, see it, you don't have to see it necessarily. Yeah. We'll have Steve closed down the shop, but I'll just say I'm not going to pretend like this is the last time I'll ever watch this movie. Like I know I'm going to watch it repeatedly, but it is the one that I go back to Least. Well, no, Crystal Skull is. Of the original three, sure.

This is the one I go back to the least. Even, you know, in spite of all the, you know, dicey shit, which is there, and I mean, hey, engage with problematic art, folks. That's how conversations happen. But even on top of that, it's just, it is a bad script.

The structure of the story kind of sucks. The fact that, like, once we literally go into these caves, You don't leave them until we're shooting water out the side of a mountain. It's a long time to be underground. I just don't think any of that feels right. It doesn't feel like these pseudo world hopping adventures that Indiana Jones has in other stories. So just on like a technical level and like a writing level, not that great.

Craft-wise, yeah, of course it's great. And it does have a lot of really fantastic moments in it. And, you know, Kihei Kuan, great performance. Indiana Jones, great performance. The only two great performances. in the movie really from the from the main cast our main trio there i'll say uh but yeah you know it's the lightest of recommends especially if you haven't seen it i mean you got to you got to be completest about everything uh but yeah that's me steve say it yeah it's i i i have nostalgic

feelings for it but it's really for the beginning it was funny like literally after that rat once that raft goes out that boat out that plane i'm like oh now the rest of it's going to happen And the rest of it does happen And like, yeah, Khi Kwan's great He's a great find And obviously that's kind of cool Like his whole story With everything everywhere

It's really great And then Harrison Ford giving him the award The whole thing It's a really sweet story He's a really sweet guy And it's a really cool thing And he's great in this movie And like there's just

It just ages like really poorly I think it aged poorly The second was made Like where Lawrence Kazdad saw it Saw the writing on the wall I was like no fucking thanks dude Poorly before it was made Dude, an aged, like, chilled monkey brain.

It's just, I mean, like, it's the lightest of recommends if you're an indie head. It is, and as of this recording, the third best Indiana Jones movie ever made. So we'll see you where that goes. Which brings me to a quick final thought, because, well, I guess especially with Eric, we've been good about guessing things that happen in movies. And I just want to put that out there before we see Dial of Destiny.

do we think and how much of a detailed explanation they're going to give for the lack of mutt Williams in this movie. Oh, I bet. We mentioned it at all. Maybe not. Honestly. I think there's a mention of he got divorced from Karen Allen and he's living in an apartment or something. I read that. No, I'm serious. Okay. Got into a bar room ball brawl and was stabbed to death. Oh, he was murdered in the street. got a shot in the head in Korea or something. Just, you know, all these things. You know, bad things happen to all

kinds of people in the middle of the day. He finally heard his own name said back to him and he killed himself. I think I'm named what? Oh, I'm going to murder myself right away. There's all kinds of ways you can get rid of the kid. I would just love a flea bag turns to him and goes,

how's mutt doing? And he goes, who? And that's the end of that because someone fires a gun. I don't have a dog. That is going to do it for this episode on Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom. If you'd like more We Hate Movies, including an additional discussion on an Indiana Jones movie. Check out our Patreon. Patreon.com slash We Hate Movies. Which not only has our brand new Last Crusade episode, but we also did Raiders of the Lost Dark like one or two years ago.

So that is also available for you. Both great episodes. Both worth your time. And we've got a brand new sinkable commentary coming out this month. if you're going Spider-Man crazy we're doing Spider-Man No Way Home That's right It'll be my second time

Going through that movie Same It'll be an interesting re-evaluation I think you were very sour on it It's half and half It's one of my Especially for that phase Of the Marvel universe

It might be one of my favorites But that's a low A low bar It'll be a fun thing to watch Along with us We'll talk about Defoe Oh DeFoe's all over And that's the other thing

With the commentaries man And it's not like a H or an L. It's just hanging out watching a movie. We're just chilling out together. Speaking of chilling out, we got an animation, damnation on Beast Wars. Is that right? Yeah, it's on the beast.

We're to tie in with our episode last week on Rise of the Beasts or a couple weeks ago on Rise of the Beasts. We did even more transformer beast content just for Chris Cabin. I love that much. Speaking of beasts on the Gleap Glossary, Boss Nass, the B. That's right. That motorboat and son of a bitch. big fat green gungan. You're going to want to tune in. Coming up after the game, big fat green gungan. Going to want to tune into that. And the latest Disney plus streaming. Yes. But also speaking

of monsters, Dr. Beck is back on Once in a Lifetime. We are talking once again about a stalked by my doctor film. This one is him crossing over into another lifetime timeline. Just one more. And then Melrode 2 and O, of course, back. We've got a good Jim Walsh up. going on this week. Oh, yeah. The season two finale. Yes, Wedding Bell Blues. Quite the listen. And I just realized

between the commentary and once in a lifetime, it is just, it's the month for multiverse stuff here. That's true. And the main feed here, of course, the show continues next week. The summer blockbuster extravaganza, which I didn't say up top but this is a part of as well.

Continues, Steve, with a conversation on what motion picture? Get your lasagna out, folks. We're going to be a bunch of fat, lazy cats. We're talking the Garfield movie. Oh, yeah. Which is the first one, which is from, I don't even know what year. 2000 something. Yes. 2000 doesn't matter.

Back when you could have Breck and Meyer in a movie. 2004. And because that cat's too fucking fat for one podcast to talk about. We're going to bring our friends from Talking Simpson, Bob Mackie, and Henry Gilbert on. Oh, yeah. A big old fat six-man cast coming your way next week. Oh, nice. Isn't that a treat?

Now, this is, of course, the Bill Murray voiced Breck and and Jennifer Love Hewitt's starring motion. Yes, indeed. So until next week, we're stuffing our faces full of yummy lasagna.

I've been Andrew Juppin. Stephen Sadek. Eric Siska. Chris Cabin. Take it easy. That was a HitGum podcast.