We Hate Movies - S15 Ep786: Signs

Episode Date: February 25, 2025

“Who doesn’t want to live like the Donner party?” - Steve On this week’s episode, WAIT-WHUT-uary comes to a close with a convo on a film by the MACK DADDY of WAIT-WHUT endings, M. Night Shyamalan’s Signs! How amazing are all the performances in this movie? Kids included! Is this one of Night’s best-shot films, what with the incredible cinematography by the legendary Tak Fujimoto? How hilarious is that Michael Showalter appearance? And who didn’t mess themselves with that Brazilian birthday party video? PLUS: Beware the offering of “heavy” water… Signs stars Mel Gibson, Joaquin Phoenix, Abigail Breslin, Rory Culkin, Cherry Jones, Merritt Weaver, and M. Night Shyamalan as Ray Reddy; directed by M. Night Shyamalan. Tickets are on sale now for our three-night residency during the Oxford Comedy Festival! We’ll be doing six shows over three nights from July 18 through 20, doing shows like WHM, W❤️M, The Nexus, The Gleep Glossary, and Animation Damnation! Tickets are going fast, so friends over there, snag your tix!  Throughout 2025, we’ll be donating 100% of our earnings from our merch shop to the Center for Reproductive Rights. So head over and check out all these masterful designs and see what tickles your fancy! Shirts? Phone cases? Canvas prints? We got all that and more! Check it out and kick in for a good cause! Original cover art by Felipe Sobreiro.

This week on the program, Twas Water killed the beast. We're talking. I'm Night Shyamalan Signs. I'm Andrew Jupin. I'm Stephen Saneck as portrayed by M. Knight Shambelon. Eric Sineska. I'm sorry what I did to you and yours. And we hate movies.

Hello everyone. Welcome to We Hate Movies. Thank you for tuning into the fine program. As always. If you're catching us for the first time because you're a big M. Nighthead. Well, welcome to The Party, pal. This is the comedy show where we talk about a movie Good, Bather, otherwise, and kick it around for a little bit. wait what the end of wait what you are we had to end with the king gotta come for the king wait what got to get that in for the last time totally and the funny thing about this wait what the wait what is kind of like wait the aliens did what like this movie's a total alien fuck up well it's sort of like the wait what you are he's like that did it right and the time got turned in the middle east with water exactly i think it's a wait what every 10 minutes in this movie like they keep on turning it over to like, well, now there's this, and then there's this, this. Well, because this movie is kind of twist the movie.

Like, literally, like, everything in this movie serves the twist. And almost only, like, there is an emotional storyline. There is, you know, the family drama. But it is also like, oh, when you're looking at that, that was part of the twist. Oh, yeah, that asthma, that's part of the twist. Oh, that dog being dead. That's got to be part of that twist there. Don't worry about it.

I mean, we're going to get into it, but I think part of that is the fact that what he's talking about here is uncertain in faith and like the fact that you can see things as like portents of doom or joy or any of those things and yeah they might be wrong they might be right like if you literally have there is no certainty to it there is no he talks about the two sides in this movie a bunch and what he's saying is sometimes they're right sometimes they're right right and it's not but i doesn't feel like a centrist thing it feels like more of a spiritual thing it's a spiritual thing which is funny to me because the biggest the biggest weight what of all is the end of the movie when Mel as this

you know self self canceling priest there like his wife has died he loses his face that's what the movie is about but the fact that organized religion is still kicking around after an alien thing that is the biggest way I feel like

that would be maybe even you've seen influx you know like we had the pandemic and I thought I think in ultraviolet I said we need a global medical catastrophe for people to believe in science it would the exact opposite That one blew up in our face. Here we are, yeah. So I could see it happening. And you know, what's great about this movie

too is like the, it's contained. An alien movie that's so contained. This could be a play. Yes, easily. And I think the performances are pretty great. But it's very, I think it's incredibly cinematic. Like the way this is shot is insane. Like all of his movies are that way. And like, I think we had to we had to all get over the fact that his move, he's always

going to write like this. Like it's not, thing he's not fucking with you this is how he writes and like you either are are in on it or you're not and at some point i think sometimes they're more inviting and sometimes they're not i think this is way more inviting than a lot of the other ones uh but i think that's all the as i said i think it's about faith do you believe that he means this do you believe that he's trying to say something here or or do you think he's just out for a buck as he's just trying to make i think but em knight really clearly has two halves of a career like this is the first half and And now we're in the second half.

I think very clearly, like, there's a divide. After the happening, he got laughed out of Hollywood pretty much entirely. Then he goes on, does his Apple Plus stuff. People say, it's pretty good. Then switch split comes out. They said, that's pretty good. And now we're doing stuff. And like, they're very, and the movies are very, like, splits very different than this.

Knock at the Cabin, which I think is great is, is the best of the second half. Trap is fun, but kind of stupid. Old is fun, but kind of stupid. These are different than these movies where these were. big prestige blockbustery kind of movie. Oh, yeah. This was huge. The next Spielberg. Yes. The next Spielberg. This is the second in his, uh, in the box office, right? Like six cents and then this were the biggest of sex. And the question there, and it's still

kind of the question with M-night, but it's less so because he's done movies where it's not so twist reliant was so motherfucker, what's the twist? Like you show up. It's like, and you're already going, all right, so what's going on with that dog? You're immediately looking for it. Sure. that's what these movies were. Paint yourself in a corner by making that the cornerstone of your career. And he did it, yeah, then he did the village

and then he did fucking the happening which is literally... No, no, no, no. Village into, dude, you're forgetting the big lady in the previous episode. That is the crater. That is that. And then that's when people started laughing at him. Because then it's that into happening

into last Airbender, which everybody hated into after Earth, which previous episode... And now, uh, well, the last Airbunder probably didn't have a huge twist, right? Did it? I didn't watch it. But anybody fucking showed up to watch it. I mean, I've seen it.

The fans who are like fans of that anime, like hated it. It's not, it's not loyal to the, right? The Hooters weren't big enough. Is that right? No, that's not a hooter. Are you sure? Yes, dude. Some of the kids ones are not Hooters sent.

Are you sure about that? It's a hooter. It's a hooter free. I'll say that Team Rocket look pretty sexy. Yes. That's fair. They are, Eric. Yes, that is fair.

Yeah, you can imagine both of them 60-90s. Absolutely. But I am telling you, Eric, it's not 100%. There's a few that are not that way. And by a few, I mean like 30%. The isolation thing, Eric, that you pointed out, right, is the contained rather, is really great, right? Because

what that does, not leaving the farmhouse, the only information we get about what's going on with the alien invasion is through the same means that the characters have, which is television, radio, and hearsay. So in a baby monitor. Right. But like in another movie,

we're going a different location. Like, it's like the president needs you. Exactly. And you're confirming things like that's the thing he's not allowing you to do. There's no certainty in a lot of other movies you are constantly going back to the fact like this is fact and this is not. Yeah. This you're

constantly questioning everything. I think certainty about their intentions though I don't think there's any uncertainty as whether or not there's any gleap glops running around. Right but it's also like at first there is. Yeah. At first sure but the movie early into the second act is like there's there be a lot of. Eventually they confirm like

little facts but you never get the full like the Independence Day right you almost immediately get like you get the they're trying to blow us all and the fact that they split the cast amongst different locations you get the bigger picture this is so contained that this is more realistic like if I if an alien

if aliens invaded now yeah I'm in my stupid house I'd be like what and then you it trickles in the info trickles in two things one this is that and you're right because it's very this is a very post 9-11 movie we're watching it.

You don't know what I mean? We're experiencing it on our couch. 24 hour news cycle. I do appreciate that he's in the closet. That's very funny. And secondarily, the other reason why you don't give the whole picture because the whole picture's kind of stupid.

I'm sorry, why the fuck would an alien go to a fucking planet that is full of water? It's like, oh, water's bad. How do you fly a spaceship but not know that water hurts you? Well, you know, I think again, dude, this just goes back to this, man. Nobody's perfect and everybody fucks up at work.

I guess so. And some alien navigator was just like, here's the next one. Looks like a pretty sharp place. What's all that blue shit? Looks a lot. No, no, no. There's some people get foolhardy. Like, why do we need Greenland?

You know? Like, you just kind of just go for you. Like, I don't know. They're desperate. I mean, again, we don't know. Again, you would be, you would confirm why they're there in another movie. Totally. You don't know.

You are left to wonder. Why is this happening? We do not have Glorps manifesto to understand why. they need earth. No, we just leave the manifestos for the domestic terrorists. Of course, which, you mean patriots. They have the ability to make interstellar travel,

crop signs. They don't have guns. They just showed up fucking butt-ass and aching. Hold on a second. They got a handsome spike on their wrist that shoots a little poison. Hell yeah. That is a fascinating part of this movie. They should have had him like jacking it off to get it going.

What is not? I'm going to pop. This is that we have sex that I'm playing it. Good God Oh, ew Steve said that Sure did, not me I gotta tell you You know what's crazy

Nowadays you put on an M Night Shyamalan movie From back in these times This was 2002 by the way I should say You just get that touchstone pictures logo Doesn't that just take you back And speaking to credits He was feeling himself this time around

It's like full Hitchcock with the credits So Hitchcock I'm not fooling around with it Just do it And made me want to think, like, what would Hitchcock do with an alien premise, you know? Like, what would it be like, Carrie Grant? Like, no, mother, the aliens didn't give me a chaser. Oh, here you already forgot about the cranberry juice.

Oh, you know. Oh, no, I was supposed to kill that alien with water, but there's no water in the house can follow the liquor. You want me to pull down the moon? You got to engineer it at the White House. No, the whiskey's not working on them. I'm throwing whiskey all over this alien and it's not working. What are you mean? You want mashed potatoes in French?

tall. It's not one with the two carbs. Chicken tarrague again, we have one with them. Any size with that or just chicken? And no pharmacist, I don't care about whatever curses you are saying. Thank you very much, man. Oh, dude, you know, good old Merritt Weaver. She had a moment a little bit.

I love her. She's great. She's been mostly TV lately. Yeah. I do want to say something before we get two in this. I don't want to do one to get scared. or if they have kids in the room this movie does contain

tobacco depictions. Please. So stop right now. We might talk about it. Was this, is this Disney? This was Amazon. I rented it on Amazon.

There was a giant tobacco depictions banner before the movie started. It was like part of the time code. Yes. Yeah, what really? Yes. Wow. And you know what it is?

It's like a second and a half of Joaquin Phoenix, flicking a cigarette away it's two it's two instances is it two instances yes when they go into town to get pizza and he's walking wakene goes to the army recruitment office yes he's got a butt in his hand when he's talking about it's out on the lawn it's so and then later i think the one you're talking about he's out on the lawn my baby saw it it's not like i would be chain smoking in that basement with the aliens coming down oh totally dude chain smoking all sorts of shit fucking crack whatever i can find he's gonna die anyway don't worry i don't care if he has

I'd be like tinkering in that veterinarian's office like sure let's see what he's got it's like freebasing all the dog morphine what's the lights go out and it's like oh fuck all you would hear is be jacking off at the corner with your family in the basement I'd be facing the other way amazing that you could get a wrecked in that situation so wait you're going to Blair witch project yourself into orgasm oh my god the aliens are mind controlling uncle Steve no they're not it's protein you got to feed your family come on no Wait, listen, the Donner Party did that. I guarantee the Donner Party when they were straighted.

Yeah, exactly. They started with Com. Before they went extreme with it. Here's a calm cookbook we made, just to make sure. No, because back in the day, you didn't even know. It's just an old timer goes, yeah, yeah, drink this down, you know, it'll be good for you for the weather and all. But so, wait, so the Donner Party, I don't know that they necessarily had the technology at the time to understand that there was protein and cement. Well, listen, I don't even, I don't even.

even know if it's true, but yes, it is true, and it's something. If you get enough of it, I guarantee you'd fill your belly and you'd feel right as rain like Rod Stewart. This is starting to sound like that Gwen Stefani rumor I heard on the bus in the fifth grade. Of that, similar to the Rod Stewart.

It's all the same. The pumping of the stomachs just O-Ding on seamen. I just find it so unbelievers. Especially if you had Siemenex in the end. Oh, semenx, dude, you'd fucking drown from the inside out. The water is so heavy. What is in it? What could possibly be in it? It is. That's what

What's your call it? Water plus. Yeah, this is Earl Donner. You're going to want to drink that heavy water. It's a, ooh, that storm's coming down. Something fierce. Have some heavy water. Rub your chest. You'll be warm. It'll be cozy. That's right, folks. We have Donner's serum here. Finally, we are selling it. We have it for your, you only 55, 55.

I guarantee you, a lot of those traveling elixir salesmen, it's like, step right up, have my piss and come. Drink it down. It'll cure your ailments. Who doesn't want to live like the Donner party? Yeah, they were really just living high on the hog that Donner party. Hague, that's true. Underline hog. I do you think it's interesting to say

Blair Witch, because it's also post-Blair Witch, and certainly at the end with the flashlights and the dropping and the camera is just sort of stationary and we're watching legs moving. It felt very Blair Witch to me. Totally, yeah. I love that so much of that basement sequence is just lit almost entirely by flashlights. It's really cool.

But yeah, especially like, it's the part of the found footage movie where the camera falls on the floor. It happens in all these fucking found footage movies. It felt very much that way. Yeah, totally. I would like to imagine that we do find out that at the end, the aliens did kill people. Although we don't see anybody, so it's a radio thing you don't know, for sure. Right. He's hearing it from the radio station.

Joaquin as brother Merrill is like, oh, yeah, they took a bunch of people and then left. A lot of people died. There's some crank on the radio who is talking about it. but I know if that it's it's an art bell type angrier than art bell west of the Rockies you're on the air you're being taken by aliens I have to imagine

West of the Rockies we were right Michael Schoalter's dead Oh yes Oh definitely he's gone He has been done away with This was the first time I've seen this movie Since I was like more actively aware Of who Michael Schoelter is

And I was like Michael SchoWalter Yes M-night Shamelon signs you gotta be kidding me That's a bar bet to lose I was totally shocked Dude, that's a good fucking router for the cinephile game probably. But I must have known, because I was a huge state head as a kid. So when I saw this movie the first time, I must have known that.

And I just totally forgot. Yeah. Oh, there he is. One of the guys from the state. I was very interested in who was making money at that. I was like, yeah, he did it. You were always happy when your sketch comedy friends went on and made movies every single time. I mean, I do like that we, as we're saying, it's very contained.

We begin the danger is I can't hear my. children. Yes. And then at the very end, what is it? He can hear his children. The children playing that's very nice, but it opens with him bolting, him and Joaquin Phoenix, almost killing himself, bolting out of sleep because they hear Abigail Breslin screaming. Screaming in the cornfield. You've got this really awesome shot of the wall in their house with like the outline of

where a crucifix used to be. So you know what someone's out of crisis of faith in this household. Which is clearly why Mel Gibson took this role. I'm sure he was really excited to play a clergyman. I think actually this might be Mel's best performance. Kind of, yeah. It's really fucking good. It's really, especially towards the end

with those flashbacks. I was getting affected and I don't get affected. That's amazing because I was being affected watching this movie going. I bet you Eric felt nothing. So it's a testament to the movie that you felt so. I did feel. It's a little overwrought, but I mean, that's what this movie is. It's a melodrama. You know what I mean?

Look, that's a, not, what's crazy to think, like, it is a science fiction melodrama. Like, what a wild mashup to make work. Now I want a Douglas Cirque, a UFO movie. I mean, but that is also what he does. He turns these, like, trap. It's not really what it looks like from the outside. It is much more of this weird character study and this weird family drama.

Like, it is a, he always does this. And I think that's what made people turn on him so quickly is because they're like, this is weird. This is too weird. Is the family drama, the drama of him putting his family in movies? I mean, that's. Also that, yeah. There's meetings on meetings. I just wish that movie never left the stadium.

Sure. I like that movie. I had a good, good-ass time with that movie. We're at the fucking house at the end. I don't know. I really liked it. I really want to rewatch it. It's a good in, man.

The 4K is really nice. I just picked it up. I'm excited. This would want to revisit Knock of the Cabin's. Knockin' Cabin is excellent. Yes, like that a lot. I do have to say, like, because we're talking about the similarities like, this, and you're going to hate me.

this and knock at the cabin clearly have a lot of similarities because it's all about what are you seeing on the media versus what is happening immediately single location for the most part coming back and forth as to what do you believe what do you have faith in after seeing knock at the cabin

which I also really like I go back to the happening and I'm a happening fan now stop it because it is dealing with very similar things the Walbert performance is tough dogs what about the hot dogs how much longer must I put up with it?

come on let me hear your argument son of a bitch I guess admittedly I have a rewatched since that episode which was 10 years ago or whatever I see the difference is Mel Gibson is I know he's a bad person everyone you don't have to comment below but Mel Gibson is a better actor

than Mark Wahlberg period that is the problem with that movie is if you get somebody other than Wahlberg in there I maybe maybe I actually think it's one of his better ones but like as it is I think it's dealing with a lot of the same things that this movie's talking about and that

knock at the cabinet is talking about with faith and who you who can you trust right but it's it's such a business the problem with the happening here's my evidence is if I have to is that it's this the present the aside from Walbrook which is a crater in the film he's playing the science teacher everybody I mean come on

is the whole bit of I mean the premise is so out there this is like that it takes so much to explain and you have to like it's the explaining it takes too much time at the end to be like this is exactly what you saw whereas this it's an alien you get it you know what I mean like

it's an alien invasion movie which we've been doing since what the fucking 30s if not earlier and I will say speaking of the intimacy of this this reminds me of I mean like it's an alien invasion movie and we've just gone through all the independent station we always have to watch the something in Washington blow up

I'm this is very contained and it reminds you that Wolfman movie which is also very contained but very bad and I think it's a sign of like a good director to be able to make real drama in like a house without a body count he's doing a lot with a little yes exactly and his images

he has images rather than imagery like that's right the wolf man is just all like swirling and it's like taking all Robert Eggers tricks and like making them boring rendering them boring well it's already on streaming so I'll be checking it out intoxicated at some point

already I'm pretty sure it got turned over already that is fucking but you're You know, there is a body count in this movie. We've got two dead dogs. Man, one half or another. Christ Almighty. But, yeah, so we do have... Those eerie kids, by the way.

Oh, I don't know. I don't buy that explanation. I think those kids just wanted to kill that dog. Disagree on the eerie news. I think they're both adorable here. Spooky. We got... I mean, it's Mel as Graham has,

Joaquin Phoenix as Merrill, Hess. Abigail Breslin, his little beau. And Rory Culkin, looking a lot like a young Macaulay here. Very much so, yeah. As Morgan, the little brother with... asthma the weird thing

in this movie is they kind of are doing a like Abigail Breslin's character is like this old soul possibly

touched with some psychic ability kind of stuff she's an angel Andrew yeah I mean it is kind of that right

I'm glad they didn't dwell on that no but it's like when Mel gives that whole thing about like oh when you were born you smiled at me

and like babies can't smile and it's just that weird like I'm just thinking to myself babies can't smile Baby didn't smile at you Note to self-gool that

Babies can't smile But again it's not really put They don't put too fine a point on it It's just like she's kind of weird And her weirdness Whatever that gift is That's making her do this water thing You know winds up

Right Helping out what's going on being a move I mean When I moved in with my wife She would always leave glasses Half full around I do this too People do this

So it's interesting And like again it's like, is it faded or is it just a thing? Turns out it's just no, it's just a thing, it's more dishes. But like well, yeah, at home, yes. I'm not being like, God damn it, Salica, wait a second, somebody

get me my type right. Oh, here comes another movie. Speaking of Rakeen Phoenix, did you read I read this, I don't know if it's true. He came in, you hear about this? He came in a week before shooting. It was supposed to be Mark Ruffalo who dropped out because he had like a

tumor surgery or something going on. reason to drop out there. I know, but like now you know, Joaquin's been through the ringer for dropping out of movies a week before filming. So you know what? I think you give one, you take one. He did. He came in to the last second here. He nailed it. You could take it, you could rip out,

you could just pull out of another movie. It's an interesting one for O'Kee, because he's just kind of a regular guy, which almost never happens. Dude, he's a regular former athlete. Yes. I don't think that's ever happened in his career before or sin. He's not, he's like stupid, but not like dangerously stupid. He's just kind of a

He's just a guy. He's just a guy that's there, which is, which is, I feel like that's a Pennsylvania thing, right? Oh, yeah. They got a lot of guys around there. Yeah, there should be the state flag. Just a guy that's sitting around. The flag is just a dude and a t-shirt and sweatpants. One hand in his pocket just aimlessly looking around.

We should say yes. Fox County, Pennsylvania. Sure. Make sure you know it's 45. It's within an hour. If it's over an hour, it doesn't count. I promise we're still within an hour. The city limits, folks, don't retaliate at the bike.

Bucks County 40 miles from Philadelphia, go birds, go birds. And then the movie starts. I mean, William Penn was probably the first guy just in sweatpants all the time smoking a butt out on the stoop. That's true. Throwing batteries of people. Okay, so yeah, not sweatpants, a burlap sat. That was the sweatpants of the Donner party. Donner sweats.

If you're going to be stuck, you know, on the trail such as it is, you want to be comfortable. When you're eating the leg of your travel companion. I knit you two burlacks potato sacks as pants and drink your heavy water. Oh, the heavy water. Some skin in my teeth, here. Well, that's just the viscous of the heavy water. So we are getting to the cornfield. So I say, worder, is that the worder?

It would have to be worder. It would have to be worder. We get to this cornfield, and we don't see what's going on yet. and you hear, I think it's Rory says, I think God did it and Mel says, did what? He turns his head and you see the crop circle that has been

overnight has been planted in their field. I don't know. Looks like Lionel and the Wolfington Brothers to me. Dude, that looks like they're working. Lionel and the Wolfington Brothers reminded me. Great body principality album, by the way. The Wolfington Brothers did a thing or two.

But that name specifically reminded me another thing about his writing. Yes. It's like kind of a not as good Stephen King, but it's those same kind of vibes where you're like, you're constantly saying that full, like Stephen King loves saying

the name of things repeatedly. Like I just saw the monkey the other day and it's the same thing. Like in that script which is based on a short story of his. The new monkey. Yeah, the new monkey. Yeah, the Oz Perkins movie.

And like we're just, we're repeating names over and over and over again. And this movie does that all the time. And then I was like, oh yeah, like he does kind of have a Stephen Kingy sort of vibe be in his screen. Oh, for sure, yeah, yeah. And by the way, this crop circle looks amazing. It's practical, which again, this dude had the

juice at the time. He's like, we're going to do it. We're going to do it. We're going to do it. We're going to do it the same way the fucking conspiracy theorists themselves do it. Which is not expensive. Stop with your computers. Stop with the, I know you love your fucking computers and you love going on the internet. Stop it. That's what Teamsters isn't there for. They're waiting for you to tell them to do something. You get a teamster, you give them a fucking board, like a heavy-ass, like log kind of a thing. There's rope on either side of it. You just have a teamster pull that shit through a cornfield and make a crop

circle. That's all. It looks great. Maybe get some overtime out of the deal. Great. Totally. You just got to shoot around the cigarette butts on the ground, but you know, that's okay. It's all fine. Overtime. It's not happening. So we get right away, like there's something up. You know

something's up. The dog is kind of weird. It's pissed on the floor. Houdini. Houdini and Isabelle are the names of these dogs. Weird names for D. dog. He couldn't escape his faith, though.

No, like a punch to the stomach. We call Cherry Jones the thirstiest fucking detective. She is so thirsty in this entire movie. Well, she sees

she's got the two two brothers here. Exactly. Both single and ready to mingle. Well, one's not ready to mingle it. She wants some of that heavy water. She does.

She's just like, oh, hello, father. How's it going? And this is more this is more Stephen King kind of stuff because she's like, he's like,

I called you two. hours ago. By the way, she just shows up in the house. Yes. No announcement, no, not. Small town. Small town. No, no, no. No, no. I'll shoot you dead. I don't know, man. Here's the deal. If you were the person to inform me that my wife was tragically bifurcated in a traffic accident, you can just walk in a special treatment. No, no, no, I'll

shoot her dead. Kill the messengers, what I said. Yeah, yeah, you with a gun. Um, yeah, that's true. I don't have any guns. Yes, I know people think I have guns, but I don't. I just at least have an image of you with a gun. You shoot it you fly back. Yes. It'd be like a big cartoon duck. Absolutely.

That's generally my feeling. I see no reason to shoot a gun. But speaking of heavy water error, uh, she has this story of Mrs. Kindleman. Yes. Freaked out and spat all over the skateboards at poor Thornton's

store. And all of this is Stephen King kind of stuff. Yeah. Naming that old lady. You're naming the dude who owns the store. Yes. There's like shop keep mischief that's going on. And she's, it's so disgusting.

She's like, and yeah, so she, she got mad that the boys were riding on the skateboard. So she went into the store and spit on all the new skateboards. And I think she must have been sick or something. And she's talking about the viscous of this woman's luge. And I was just like, and then she's like, I don't know when I'm going to eat again. And I was like, neither do I. That's like, that's like, that's like, but watching this now in today's light, I'm like, I miss when old women would spit on people and things instead of believing in QAnon or whatever else. This was down home, easy. freezing, spitting on skateboarders.

I understand it. There's no vast conspiracy. They're touching grass. And by that, I mean, spitting on actual people as opposed to yelling on the internet. Exactly. We got to start spitting on each other again. Get off the internet, get outside and spit on somebody. Make America spit again. You know what? Let's just start spitting on the computers.

How about that? That's a great idea. Maybe they'll show some of the fucking computer. I love her and Mel are going over like what could have happened here and she's like well i don't think this is the wolfington brothers they can't take a piss without wet in the front side of their pants that's awesome just like william penn and we get a little thing here where she keeps saying like oh father this that and the other thing and he's like hey caroline by the way it's been six months uh the father thing

off the table now this was a question i have because they at one it's father father father mostly but then at one point someone says like aren't you going to be a reverend again father is specifically reserved for catholic priests and episcopal oh and episcopals use father okay and i looked it up it's supposed to be a pixel okay i didn't know that i saw it was supposed to be episcopal do they say reverend and father interchangeably i think that's a bunch of bullshit and by the way speaking to the catholics like you're wearing their uniform what do you know it's like him dressing up his NYPD and going to work in philadelphia it doesn't work it doesn't priests are more like it's the

Episcopal religion is as I understand they don't believe in anything it's Catholicism with some water it's just you know what I mean they don't they don't do like the stained glass stuff they don't like decorating yeah they're much less homophobic which is great yeah that's good that's where you want to go if you know you care about certain things

sure but yeah I just didn't know how much that was interchanged I always thought like father was reserved just for a Catholic priest but then someone says Reverend later in the movie and I was like that's the thing is like we are so informed like well, me very loosely Catholic background. These two guys Catholic Cab and who the hell knows?

Zero. Well, that's the thing is anyone tells me about other Christian sex. It sounds like heuracy. I feel like my ears are burning. The Catholics really do it to you, man. They do a number on you. Dude, I'll tell you what, I went to one Christmas we went to North Carolina where my in-laws were living at the time. And they're very religious.

and so we were going to a Christmas Eve ceremony, you know. And I don't put up a fight. Like, if he asked me to go, fine. I can sit someplace and not listen to a fucking thing. I've gone to church all the time. What denominations is this? They kind of flop around, but it's like some sort of Christian. Couch surfing.

It's not Catholic Presbyterian possibly. I think they've dabbled in that. I think they've dabbled in Methodist. I think they've dabbled in Unitarianism. Unitarianism is a lot. They go wherever the hate is. less, you know what I mean? And so, you know, yeah, like, I will sit there.

I will raw dog a church service, man. I will fucking sit there and just looking for it. I mean, it's better than, you can't listen to a podcast. It's kind of rude. Right, right. You can't make heavy water there. They told me not to. I can kind of like maybe like, try to play an episode of Seinfeld in my head or something, you know.

It's called to tune it out, baby. I love it. But to your point, this, Steve, like, it never, like, if you're brought up in the Catholic church, it never escaped you. The whole time I was like looking around. I thought someone was going to assassinate me for being in the wrong building. Because it's, you know, and they're doing it in English. I guess the Catholics do that now, too, but there's less pageantry.

I go to Methodist Church sometimes for Christmas or whatever. Yeah. I've been to Orthodox churches. It sounds better because they've got the spookyisms and they're doing all the weird stuff. And I like this weird stuff. Church should be spooky. Absolutely. Yes.

God should not be accessible easily. I don't know, man. I saw a spotlight. There's some pretty spooky church actions going on. I was going to say. A lot of heavy water. Oh, man. The dam is broken

I'm really glad I didn't have to do with any of that shit Damn fuck the first night did the alien Well actually the first thing is the the the kid kills the dog Right this is the I can't hear my children They run out Rory Colton I mean she's just stabbing this dog this kid's a maniac I will tell you this though I appreciate And you guys in the room

And you if you've listened for a while Know my deal with violence against dogs Specifically in movies animals in general but dogs I'm a dog guy You're pro you're pro you're pro Absolutely 100% which is why I was glad like they save us in both

instances seeing a dog suffering like when you get here it's a dog puppet and it's dead yeah there's a classy way to kill a dog but I'll tell you what's fucked up though is like he Mel goes to like take the kid inside you know whatever get your sister out of the way and Cherry Jones

pulls what is a it's a barbecue fork out of this we've seen as the scene starts Rory Culkin's just flipping some burgers on the grill Yeah, you let a fucking eight-year-old kid Using Grills, sure, whatever. He's going to burn him. Didn't you hear?

She just, because I thought it was like maybe like a butcher knife or something I didn't remember. And she just pulls out this long fork. I was like, Jesus Christ, that dog got killed. And it looks like that thing. You see a lot in like monster movies and whatever where it's like the person falls back holding the thing up and the monster jumps on it. Oh, yeah. He watched the movie The Edge the other night.

He did the Emily Hopkins. Yes. Probably one of the most famous. instances of the move I'm talking about. Yeah. But yeah, so the dog is dead. It was freaking out. It looked like it was going to attack Bo, the little girl. So, you know,

this kid's steps up. Oh, that dog. Those squirrels were about to attack my little sister. All those young men were about to attack my little sister. My friend here, he was going to attack my sister. And so I had to eat his thigh. So the first night is, we get this

really sad moment where Beau Abigail Breslin is like Oh you know I heard you know why do you why do you talk to mommy when no one's around or whatever And he's like kind of whatever and she's like yeah I do it too She never talks back and he's like yeah neither do I or whatever all right now go to bed We have this nice sad conversation he looks out the window and here he is dude It's like all in black because it's night out and he's like kind of jack this dude looks like a ninja but this is an alien He sees on the roof of his barn.

Again, we think it's the Wolfcutter brothers or whatever those dudes are. Right, the Wolfington Brothers. I think it looks great. Here. This looks pretty cool. I think, I see what you're saying about the CG of the aliens. Once the sun hits them specifically.

But they really, it's really restrained, you know. This guy in shadow is great. The birthday party thing, I think is awesome. It is great. It's a great job. So it's sparingly. And then in the climax with him reflected in the TV, I like that. shock. Yeah. They're smart. He's smart. Exactly. He knows the limitations and no nowadays no one knows

the limitations. They think the sky's the fucking limit. Well he he knows what his image is supposed to look like. He's storytelling through the image like stuff like the, uh, the pantry thing where like you're using the hand and the knife and just having that be your thing, whether than some blasters going off and he's, he's facing off like you get the one face off at the end of the movie and it's not even like a big like it's not a male-esque like bra. fucking alien. It's a contained story. And it remains that way,

even with the aliens. This is, yeah, the aliens get to the garbage like raccoons. Oh, fuck, I told you to put that, I told you to tie up the fucking,

the aliens are going to get in it. Oh, man. Our taco shells. Told you to finish your dinner. Now look, the raccoon aliens are getting it. But this is where, like,

Joaquin is like thinking, oh, it's the Wolfington guy. It's like, we're going to go out and scare him. You run around one side of the house. I'll run around the other. We'll just swear and, freak him out. And this is a really funny

because Mel's a scumbag. He's like, it just sounds so unnatural when I swear. I was like, I don't know. You should give it a shot, Reverend. Let me call any of your ex-girlfriends that asked him that question. I mean, it sounds he really can deliver the lines. He certainly does. But it is

funny when he does. He just runs out and he's like, ah, I'm sheathing with anger. Like, this is great. And actually, to be, to put a fine point on it, Mel does not fight the alien at the end. Wakine does. Well, I just mean the fight of the alien. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

It's not a Melmoot. It's not that, I mean, it's, it's an emotional payoff rather than a narrative payoff. Correct. And this is also the formula of Shamelot at the time. Take a tough guy and make him not a tough guy. I mean, he had done it to John McLean just a few years prior to this. Twice he did it. And then twice, a few years prior to that, he fucking did him again.

Actually, in the second time, he fucking did Sam Jackson the same way, too. And then this is, and I mean, look, it's also a great way to find out what these guys have. I mean, I think Willis does really well in the six sets and an unbreakable, and I think Bell does well here. Absolutely, yeah. So, yeah, it's the next one. Basically, that scene ends with, like, I read this as the alien jumps from

the roof of the barn to the roof of the house and then over them back into the cornfield because you sort of have the shot of the cornfield looking back at the house to kind of close the scene. He stops at the swing set for a second. I better fuck with him. You know, maybe he's like, his alien cheeks hit the swing and then he

like flies into the cornfield. Oh, Totally. Oh, there's this some little condensation. Ah! Exactly. Morning due on his tukus. Fuck! Since the next morning,

Cherry Jones is over again. He sure is. Oh, totally. Oh, well, those boys are in trouble again, are they? Well, no, no, no, no. You stay right there, Sheriff. I'll go out and see what's going on. Sexy boys out on a Miller Road.

Oh, there's two of them. The young buck and the old bull. Oh, and I have both of them. That's a lot of. a heavy water. Oh man, he smells like gasoline. Help her, Merrill.

Merrill works at the gas station, which we never see. No, we do not. Because we don't need to. No, no, it's not important. The way she says it is almost kind of nasty. It is nasty. She's like, how's it working at the gas station, Merrill? It's like, I don't know, dude. How does it fucking taking his shit? This guy was a minor league

sports star, and I know that's not crazy or anything, but like going to the stadium and having fans. It's something. And you make one of you. And you make money, and it's a great time. But then now you're regulated to the gas station. You're like this deemed to be a townie because you struck out a lot. Yeah.

And now also you're living with your brother because his wife got killed and you're helping with that. Which is nice. The cop says as much. I think that's like, I think it's revealing that why she's like that is because you find out about the baseball thing. Like at the time you are like, what the fuck? Why are you throwing your business like that? Right. And so while they're having, you know, the company.

conversation at the table about like what went on you know the night before she's doing like what did they look like yeah it's a whole you know kind of overly written scene but the whole thing that keeps happening throughout it is beau keeps coming back in like daddy where's the remote where's the remote and he's like oh look under the couch cushions and whatever and crikey yeah she comes out again she's like you know like where's the remote and he's like why don't you just go change the channel on the tv she says the same show is on every channel we go to the TV and this is some news stuff going on multiple crop circles

multiple crops workers popping up in India's the story specifically that's running on CNN right now which is fun and it's creepy and like basically they're talking about you know the history of crop circles that there was a hoaxes in the 70s but this is different it's never been this large this wide this whatever it's unrealistic that enough humans could get together

to do all this over one night and actually like coordinate a bunch of hippies did it back into 60 some guy named Terragon I do like that Merrill keeps talking about the nerds oh this is what the nerds That's a great fucking monologue We fucking gave the nerds an inch and now look

what and I'm like yeah look what happened now with giving the nerds the inch We need to get these nerds back in the locker Absolutely. We need more Merrill's in office We definitely definitely salt in the earth fella I would yeah I would vote for Merle yeah former baseball star I love baseball there's a great moment here where we see rory colkin take a hit of the puffer really quickly

and it's i forget what the the setup is but it's like mel is saying something about like what are we talking about here or something like that and it just cuts to this kid hitting the fucking inhaler and he goes extraterrestrial like he's like he's fucking cancer man on the x-viles like at the back there well clearly it's extraterrestrial this kid's vaping this kid's vaping Asma has been used as like a plot device in so many movies. I feel like it's fake. Like, I feel like I see somebody with a, like, that's up. I've never met anyone with asthma.

I don't know if it's real. My brother had it when he was a kid and funny speaking of taking a hit or whatever. He would do, like, he would fucking hit this thing. And then you could like, if you didn't inhale it, you could exhale like whatever the vapor of the medicine was. So he would go like, and like, look, I'm smoking.

And I was like, I'm pretty sure that's not what this is for. But then also, like, because we were kids would be like, you get to use this other thing and it like makes you strong and you can run and so like me and my sister would be like taking hits of this thing I'm sure we went through those canisters way faster than what he was supposed to

the fucking pharmacist was probably like and that was a gateway drug to Whippets exactly that's right yeah cut to me at the concession stand when this movie came out in theaters I was definitely doing that behind and now Wippets are legal now Wippets are their own fucking thing that you can go into the fucking

what's it? What's it now? Like, like, nitrous, I mean, like, Nectris tanks. You can just, you just buy that now? Oh, yeah. Wow. Oh, dude. I've never even done. It's a huge industry. I've never, I've never done a whip in my life. The, that's what, um, they're getting in on when,

when he's first starting to, like, get his foot in the door on Tulsa King, remember? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. There's like, there's an Irish gang that is like the whip it market. Because, like, these people now, you'll see these guys around the city. When you leave a venue after seeing a concert, the dudes are there, and it's like a quick, go buy the balloon because, like, the cops come by and just kind of like, whoop, and they all run away. But, like, every single LCD sound system

concert I have left. Outside, there's dudes just with huge tanks, like, nitrous for the road, nitrous for the road. Oh, wow. And you just give them like 10 bucks and you get a little balloon and you're fucking on your way. Also, explains where we are currently. It is one of the few drugs where it is proven. It makes you stupider.

Oh, yeah. You shouldn't be doing it. No, I need to be as sharp as possible. Oh, yeah. Oh, definitely. how else who else is going to think about the donner party coming each other's mouth that's true nobody who else wb mace nobody so cherry jones is like look um you probably shouldn't be like glued to the tv we don't really know what's going on why don't you take the family into town nothing serves a you know rattled mind better than a nice good old-fashioned distraction yeah go to town have some awful pizza it's great go into town

and and have your eight-year-old and your five-year-old give them ten and let them walk into god knows where which is great and this is something that I feel like is lost now post 2002 like you're not just letting your kids walk around anymore kids you know listen kids listen to this you grew up

with this police state apparatus of your parents I didn't really have that I was wandering in the woods do whatever that fuck I wanted all hours of the day for some reason after 2001 ever got obsessed with control and like and making sure that everything was safe

I don't know why. Well, you had to keep your kids safe so they could grow up to be old enough to enlist in the military to go fight the Forever Wars, you see? You didn't want them to get hurt cycling in the neighborhood. That makes more sense

than Mahal and Drive came out. Ever since that movie, ever since the Garbage Lady, I've just held my kids a little closer. No, I don't want, my kid could walk by a dumpster and a fucking weird lady's going to jump out and yell at him.

Just look me in the eyes. What was that movie about? Shut, don't. No, you don't have to go to the bathroom. You sit down and you tell me what was that fucking movie about? These modern parents are like, we should send the dumpster lady to Gitmo. I don't want her there anymore. Ew, Iwi, we, dude, talk about bad sequels, by the way.

We're just fucking writing Gitmo back into this script. Yeah, we sure are. What are you fucking doing? Oh, boy. Oh, man. So we're in town and he's like, I love that there is a clearly, there's a pre-established Rory gets money for books because he just, puts out his hand and goes book money.

Yeah. And so they go off to the bookstore. This is, yeah, Merrill's got the butt lit and he walks. He's like, Mel's like, back in 15 minutes for pizza. So I guess he's like, I got, I got a quarter of an hour to kill. I guess I'll go see about enlisting in the army. The only, it has to be the only pizza in like 20 miles. Yeah. It's wretched.

It's so bad. They're fine. Real saucy as it looks like. You know what? It looks better than Seinfeld pizza, that abomination. But that was all because they did too much dough. There was way too much dough in the Seinfeld. Way too much dough. And this one, it's thinner, but the cheese looks bad.

The sauce is everywhere. No, thank you. It looks like you just put like a can of like ragu over a pizza and some like really cheap muts kind of a deal. It looks so shitty. Oh, Pennsylvania. Pennsylvania pizza. But we do meet the two old cranks that run the bookstore. And this, you got this one dude who's, this dude speaking of QAnon, you know, if he was still. live he would fall for it you know you know what am this is the role for you

you could be soda guy you could do this is totally fine and everyone go oh that's the director yeah oh this alien indesion's just all to sell soda I've seen 12 soda commercials in the last hour boom that's a wrap on the director folks actually what a great job

you did acting now back to the movie because fuck man it's it's tough but yeah this this old crank's like oh we don't sell none of them books there and then the lady's like actually we do have a book on extraterrestrials we just kept in the case any of the city folk

come around all the city folk come around to our little bookstore you see we get all the weird freaky shit for them I hate the city folk spit on them but is it fate or is it just something I do honestly like if the end of this movie did turn out like they fucking because the guy's like

it's all about so trying to sell you I've seen 12 commercials watch this gosh darn news all the day yeah if they're in the fucking coal coal shale shelter and like things just rattling around upstairs and bang it's just like Pepsi wants you to have a great summer gotcha and they're like what no this is just a kind of a hoax for Pepsi oh wow you you all fell for it it's the seven up dot trying to kick

your door in oh that fucking son of a bitch he thought he was so cool with those sunglasses sorry about your dog drink seven up yeah oh I guess the wolfington brothers stabbed my dogs to death well the second one anyway Here's my brother, Cherry 7-Up. We're going to go kill the noid. Oh, yeah, get that dude, too. But, yeah, so Mel, this is where we meet Merit Weaver, Mel goes in to get the puffer refilled here, and she's like, oh, hey, father, with everything that's been going on, can I, and this

was the other thing, I guess maybe Episcopals have this, too, but she wants to do a confession. Yes, yeah. Which I thought that was all lost. I thought we had the fucking market corner of confession, I don't know. So he's like, yeah, one, it's not Father anymore. And two, like, why are you fucking kidding me? Like, online at the farmer? see and yes she's

all freaked out because she's used some swear words 37 in a row but but doucheback counts out so it's actually 71 Eric yes right yeah he has to hear it in a sentence I do like it depends upon how it's used

that's a curse oh that's a curse which is a weird she goes oh in that case it's not 37 it's 71 which that's just like it's a lot of douchebag it's a lot of saying douchebag but also like it's just a bad line because it's like it's very screenplayed because like she's not playing it as like it's

probably closer to seven she's like it's 71 yes which is a very written like you're not a lot of this script is very screenplayy and I feel like the performance has overcome them yeah yeah yeah they really do they're dancing with them so maryl is talking at the army recruitment office with this dude I love this fucking guy I think this guy was a focal point of the trailer if I'm not mistaken because he's very like oh right yeah he's beyond serious about it and it's just a lot of like, you know, yeah, they said a reconnaissance group first to see what we're

all about and then when they realize that they can take us, they'll come back with more. And he's like saying it in, funny enough, like an X-Files kind of like this dude's given Mulder some secrets. How a military man would talk about this, how you are going to be invaded. And like of course, that's going to, Americans are

going to eat that slop up. So of course you put it in the trailer. You get the military guy right in there. Probing. He's either an actual military guy or he uh or he just got uh typecast because he's always playing a military guy oh really in marcy x in 24 sure the tv show uh he's also in uh he's a doctor okay uh species too he's pentagon personnel oh gi jane is in that uh keep your name out of my mouth um but the great line he has is well to make sure it's all clear and wakene is like clear for what and he's like for the rest of them

Which I'm pretty sure at least that part was definitely in the trailer. That's when the fucking score swells in the trailer. Okay, yeah. I knew it had to be. And then like, he's like, oh, you're Merrill, you're Merrill Hess, aren't you? Biggest hot shot in the world. Right. All these home run records for minor leagues.

He's got five home run records, by the way. And again, screenplay, screenplays like, why aren't you, you know, live it high on the hog having ladies lick your toes? Lick your toes. All right, sir. You know, sir, I'm just trying to see if I want to join the Army. Can we leave your fucking foot fetish out of it by any chance? Why aren't you living high on the hog getting some of that sweet, sweet pegging? What?

No, I'm not doing. I mean, be all you can be. But then, why not do that? You see, it's called probing. Totally. She pegs you to see if it's safe. So she's got a little, like a little leather shorts on, you see. And in the front of the leather shorts, there's like a little pink dick.

And it's not too big, you see. It's like a starter pack kind of a thing. You can get them bigger. I've seen them. Marcy's shown me them. I'm not there yet. I mean, my neighbor's not there yet. Just to see, if it's safe, you know, the rest of the dildos.

But then here comes Michael Schoalter talking shit to a kid Phoenix, which I wouldn't do. No, no. This is the Lionel Pritchard of Lionel Pritchard and the Wolfington brothers. Oh, he is Lionel Morton. Yes. And so here he is. And it's Michael Schoalter kind of is like a towny punk almost. He's out of leather jacket.

Michael Shawalter kind of always had big hair, but it's like big kind of. messed up Harry. Charlie Sheen and fucking Ferris Bueller. He's dressed up was exactly like that. You're right. And he, I guess, is also in the process of signing up to join the Army. He's like filling out a form at the desk and he's like, you know, because the guy is like, why didn't you ever go pro?

Yeah, looking your toes or whatever. And he's like, because he couldn't fucking hit any of the ball. He struck out more than anybody else in the fucking league. Oh, don't mind me. I'm just signing up to be in the Army over here. Like, dude, mind your own business. Well, you know, those towers just fell. Everyone's running in.

signing up to be meat on a battlefield. And this is, it is ground beef. It is Joaquin's character, started admitting like, they probably weren't that smart of a baseball player because he's like, felt wrong not to swing. And I'm like, there's a guy who doesn't know how to work a cat. I'm down here right now.

That's just the honesty and the integrity of this family. Sure, sure, yeah. We meet up for Pete's fun Mel joke here. I'd never talk to Abby Evanathy ever again. Oh, right. Yeah. But then you see who's going to go to, this guy still get

he plows, he impels a woman with his enormous truckling. Well, I just need another one. I mean, like, no. I'm going to get a coup. What's wrong with that? No, come on. You're in the country. Get a bicycle. You're in the country. You need that big haul and capacity. This guy's a veterinarian,

which is funny in detail of why he doesn't take Kudini to the vet. I'll call the doctor. Oh, you're totally right. You're totally right. Yeah, it's a nice little call back there. But you know what? You know, he felt honest mistake. I think you get one. Oh, wait. Oh, they're eating pizza.

I better peel out my enormous truck. Well, that is the thing. It's like you see them. The dent to the wife. Mel, like, makes eye contact with them and you see M. Knight. Like, oh, fuck. M. Knight as Ray Reddy is this guy's name. Sure.

And it's, again, yeah, if you totally ruin your life and everyone else is by plowing this woman into a tree, maybe not peeling out of the fucking pizzeria parking lot that's all I'm saying why don't you just put your signal on and gently get out into traffic it's 2002 I mean we haven't hit like seamless isn't popular yet

but even if it was they're too far out you are forced to go back to this place that's true it's the only pizza place in 45 minutes until you get to the big city of Philadelphia well there's pizza places there I know but that's you know it's a cute city it's nice

nice quaint city, small city. He gets a bone appetite about pizza. He's like, oh, thank God. Oh, thank God. I don't have to know it anymore. But we go, this is we go back to the house. And when Cherry Jones had been over that previous time, she's saying like, oh, you can't have my

police radio here, Morgan, but maybe if Bo's old baby monitors around, you can use that as a fun walkie-talkie. So Bo has the walkie-talkie, and when they pull back up to the house here, he started hearing like alien like little click chatter on the thing and I really like this moment of like

they all collectively have to like get up on the car he's like oh the higher you get the better the reception is and like he's on the roof of the car and Joaquin's like holding him and then Mel's trying to like keep the girl from getting up on it's just a nice like it kind of mirrors later in the movie the fucking disastrously sad fucking family

group hug they have yeah it's almost like a biblical painting of them all holding each other pointing to the sky yeah totally why can't they have girlfriend my favorite line maybe but also if you I don't know on Amazon if you had the

captions on they actually tell you what the aliens are saying to each other oh really are you sure you want to go through with this fucking invasion like there's water everywhere and have you seen the pizza I mean really it can't possibly be like that all over the world

there has to be good pizza somewhere on this planet we ran the numbers here and it's going to be more water in a couple years it's going to be a lot more water Xanthrax was over there and he was saying that it just started coming from the sky

coming from the sky in the water that's the thing is you really have to avoid certain you know like the PNW the rainforest in Florida where it rains for two seconds and then stops all the time Michigan does that too the month of April

well maybe it's a thing though we're like they're looking to totally terraform the planet right so it's like we'll we'll completely fuck it up and just make it like an air desert or whatever. Again, we don't know the plans. And this has been one of the more popular criticisms of the movie since since we are, so

uh, sensitive water, should we wear anything? No, naked. Always naked. God wants us naked. You see all that white stuff that's, that's solid and super cold? That is also the stuff that kills us. This is the stuff they should be like, they should be putting it on the moon, like

lasering the moon with hobo codes. Water bad on this planet. bad pizza as well farmer's daughter kind of nice that's what they could have been using the crop circles for you see that crop circle down there farmer's wife pretty good but a lot of the rain going around

yeah all those crop circles say don't go in the water so yeah it's like oh it sounds like two of them are talking together and that's kind of like where the scene ends and then we get in to that night and then this is Mel I like Mel talking to this dog this is the night

Mel goes out into the corner Field alone. Isabel, the dog is barking and he's got a great like, Isabel, you're going to be very embarrassed when it turns out to be nothing or whatever. And he goes, and this is a really well done, tense scene. It's just Mel and fucking corn. And this is like, this is something

that he does, M. Knight does really well. Filming seemingly sort of innocuous things and making them look terrifying. Because like, I'm not going to say too many nice things about the happening. I haven't really watched it, but from what I remember I didn't care for. But one of the things is when you're looking at

the trees and everything. It's just this, like, static shot. It's the same thing with the corn and this. Like, you're just looking at it and you're like, is something going to happen or not? But that's like the corn is the setting and in the happening. It's like, those trees are evil.

They're fucking evil. Do you hear what the trees are saying? They're shitting on our beats? Hey, trees, we're not allowed to say that one anymore. But the, that's what's great about this movie. I mean, I think that there's, is, I think there's one jump scare, and it's one of the best jump scares

in maybe cinema history. This leg here? No, the birthday party. Oh, yes, yes, yes. You don't hit the score bump on this. That's fair, but I was startled seeing Mel Gibson watching his legs slink back in. Oh, right.

Yeah, no, it is. And I love the shot. It's a great, like, wide shot of Mel, like, at one end of the Cornville. He's just got the flashlight, or he's in the crop circle at this point, and he's just, like, putting the flashlight around, and you just see the scope of the of the crop circle, and Gibson's, like, standing at one side of it. like the practicality here is great like you get that size of like holy shit

this thing is fucking big and I do like the practicality of him thinking it's still the Wolfington Brothers is something like I'm not going to call the cops I'm not going to call the news you're not going to get famous right yeah you're doing this for nothing I'm not telling anybody but then yes he

sees the leg sort of go into the crop shits his pants runs back inside and this is a great like the kids are doing dishes Joaquin is kind of just reading through that pamphlet like am I going to join the army or what he's instituted no television rule basically

yes yeah you can't watch the TV because we're all freaking out and so he comes in and he sits down and it is like shaman gives this a beat man you're sitting there and like Mel's got his back to the camera and then he's just like all right let's turn on the TV you know what I mean after a really long time and it's just like fucking

more crop circles we see now Mexico City and the lights in the sky 14 lights in the sky in Mexico City both governments US and Mexico have confirmed you know neither government has things in the air over that space or whatever. Pepsi confirms that they're not involved at all. But Coca-Cola's

winking. These were over New Jersey a few months back, huh? Oh, the drones. Yeah, whatever happened to that? Oh, they abducted me. Oh, shit. Did they were probing? Probing the air? Yeah, yeah. Just to get it pegging, but yeah, sure. Okay. See, she's got a leather pair of shorts on this name. She, the

alien. So did you go to the small, the medium, the large, extra large, what you, what you Or did you work your way up? We called the Rattler. Why, you started with the Rattler. Does that tickle the inside? That sounds like it tickles the inside.

How loud is that noise? Oh, boy. It tickles the inside eventually. You got to fucking get it in there first. That's the problem. So Rory right here is like, oh, wow, this is like history in the making. Like, we got to tape this. And he's got a tape.

He's like, oh, we got to tape over your dance recital. Beau, sorry about that. And even in these moments of like there's aliens on screen, Mel has to be the parent, like, find another tape. And you get the, you get the, line. Oh, Uncle Merrill, I'm going to use what of your tapes. Swimsuit special. He's making heavy water on that

couch. Every night. Oh, dude, this guy's got a fucking three-year subscription to Maxim Magazine. And he's got FHM coming. And stuff is also showing up sometimes. Stuff magazine, definitely. Spike TV's on a lot

in this house. Oh, dude, we're watching Gary the Rat non-stop on Spike TV. All seven episodes. Oh, Gary the rat. Was that also where they had the married with children knock off with the Bobcat Goldway thing? That was just on the CB, the WB, the WB of the time, happily ever after. Yes, that's it.

Oh, Bobcat Goldthwaite sitcom? He had a puppet character. I never knew about this. Oh, yes. Okay. It was literally just married with children with a guy that looked exactly like at O'Deele. And he talked to a fun rabbit. or was it a rabbit or isn't it sounds like a

I think it's a rabbit I think it's a rabbit maybe a mole I'm thinking of Greg the bunny though with the rabbit thing no it's a different thing I'm gonna get this interesting it's called happily ever that's where Nikki Cox came from I believe also with his face E from Andrage was in the sun yes he was a David Faustino type

yes okay this now is starting to sound a little a little familiar I never that's interesting but Uncle Merrill is definitely watching that too well I remember when the WB came out it felt like my duty to give it a shot for some reason. I was like that's a whole new network of all these

I mean like it's a brand like I was like that frog looks pretty sharp. I was this little Rory Culkin like it's a brand new network we've got a tape for this is going to be getting of a new era. If we don't support these shows they're going to be taken off the air I watched the Wayans brothers there was like a gym show that it started

out with I remember correctly like I was in on the WB a gym like GYM or yes a sitcom set in a gym if I'm not mistaken if I'm not mistaken. Wow you know it's weird is like I had I'd like hundreds of channels because of the satellite just read a giant one you had to like move manually to change

to different satellites to watch certain never had WB never had UPN which also meant that I had never seen Star Trek the next generation right yeah with the college that's crazy I probably ever seen Malcolm and Eddie I don't know what that is it's Malcolm Bajal Warner and Eddie Griffin

yes yeah no yeah a lot of those shows are just on the WB and also wasn't... That's what I do with the UPN. Oh, no, yeah, you're right, you're right, you're right. You know all these. You're new name's TV guy. I used to be a little TV guide.

There comes TV guy. I fucking loved TV. They had five seasons of unhappily ever after. Oh, that's successful. Unhappily ever after. See, that's why it's funny. Yeah, that makes sense. I mean, they did it to, like, the opening theme, like, is hit the road jack.

Yes. Of course. Who is the guy that looks like Ed O'Neill? Jeff Pearson. well speaking unhappily ever after Mel Gibson totally well the kids fall asleep yeah this is the really heavy combo yeah the kids are asleep

we're watching the thing and basically like I think I figure out what Joaquin says but like Mel gives them like kind of a tourist answer back can't you just pretend to be the guy that you used to be and like offer some comfort and right I think one of the lines he says is the nerds were right yes oh yeah yeah yeah but yeah he's like you know oh there's

there's two kinds of people like like people who see signs as like evidence that something's going to happen and then there's other people that see things that happen and just say like oh it's luck got me to this moment you know like which one of you or whatever and then Joaquin is like he says that he's the dude who's like you know all about like luck and chances and whatever else and then yeah he's like he says to mel like what guy are you and mel goes do you feel better and he says yeah and he goes well then what does it matter yeah which is odd. It's just a great, like, cutting up. But he does eventually say, like, he is, uh, he has

become a luck guy. Whereas, uh, Wulkeen is a miracle guy. Yes. Because of, uh, what's a Rita? Oh, this whole story. Ronda McKinney, uh, who almost vomited in his mouth. Yes. Uh, Miranda McKinney is his, he believes in miracles because he didn't get thrown up in his mouth. Yeah, because he

turned, uh, he was about to kiss her at a party. He turned for something. And when he turned back, she was throwing up. And he's like, if I had not turned before I went to kiss her, I would have been kissing her while she vomited. Well, Merrill, there are two kinds of people. There's the kind that are into vomit play and the kind that aren't that just think it's a bad stomach. Some of us like to get wet. It's an upset stomach.

He even said, what makes it even funny is when he's just like, and I don't think I'd ever get over that kind of thing. Like, he's just like, yeah, that would have scarred me for life. Yeah. I don't think I've got ever got over that. I kind of agree. Yeah. Like, I remember seeing this in theaters and just being like, yep. Absolutely.

I'd never fucking kiss a single soul again. You would definitely have a new view of the world. After you taste somebody else's vomit in your mouth, that I think... Big time. Just, oh, turn around. It's just, it's things that should not be. And this is where we get a Mill Gibson, like, monologue type of thing about

like how the wife, when she was dying, she just said swing away, because she was, her neurons were firing randomly in her brain, and she remembered some stupid fucking baseball game you were playing in. And that's proof that nothing matters and God doesn't exist

kind of thing. And then we go right to Mel having a nightmare about that night. This is the first time we see any of it and it's like Cherry Jones in the road like waving him down. You're single now. Hey, you're on the market. You know what? We should get a drink after this. Okay, like go say goodbye

to your wife and then we'll go down the street to Teddy's and just have a drink over it. And I'll just hear anything you want to say. And you need a vagina to lay on, I mean shoulder to lay on. You know, I have I have experience with this and yeah the best thing is just to fuck it out you know, just fuck out all the grief. That's

the best way to do it. She's on the radio like Martha, you never believe it. Graham Hess is singing. Yeah, yeah, I'm standing right next to the white. She's dying. She'll be dead. She'll be dead. Should I ring the fire alarm? What you want I got.

We go back to this scene a few times this flashback. This is, you know, we're just sort of mapping it out. It's It's really brutal hearing, like, she's pinned against it. There's like nothing under her. When we pull this car back, she's going to be fucking meat on the street. He orchestrates us so perfect because the first version, it ends with her saying she's not in the ambulance. Yes.

Like, yeah. It's perfect. Well, father, have you ever seen society? Well, it kind of looks like that under there. So, you know, I told the corner to bring a shovel. That's where we are at. You remember in Tommy Boy When Chris Farley does that huge monologue

And he just goes New guys in his back Puging his guts out There's a new guy in the back He's puking his guts out And he hasn't even seen what's going to happen He's just looking at the car with the lady Are you fond of those shoes reverend

Yeah Officer Randam McKinney is here Wait who There she is There's our little puker Hey Officer puker This is where we come back now, and I like that Merrill has the TV in the closet. It's

a very fun thing. He's just glued to it. The kids are now doing the tinfoil hats. It's also weird because, I mean, Waukeen and Phoenix is very likable in this movie. It's a very weird mode for him. Like, especially because he still has the haircut from Gladiator in this movie.

Also a likable character. Comedist, I'm number one, yeah. But I mean, like, I'm just thinking of his big roles. Like, even like, stuff that I really like, you would never really hear or whatever. Talk about lovable guy. Absolutely. I mean, look, a dude who goes around revenging women by beating people to death with a hammer.

Yes. Likeable dude in my book. Whom amongst us has not gone to a diner and imagined our violent suicide. Every guy. Depends on the diner, dude. Depends on the diner. Usually it's because I'm at a diner where someone next to me is eating diner spaghetti. Yeah, that'll do it.

He sort of, he sort of had some more likable roles recently. Come on, Come on. Comes to mind. That's a good one He's not very likable in her No But it's kind of on the line You're not trying to make him hateable

It's on the one It's like a little Beau is afraid Even though he's your Your avatar to follow this crazy Yeah that's true too Even though he's paralyzed by fear It's not exactly like a good character But yeah

I'm not with him at the beginning But towards the middle I'm like okay this guy's been through some shit I don't really care about the brown spider brother I'll be honest It's very like not a broad performance but it is just, it's weird. He's just

playing a guy. I mean, he's plugging in, you know, at the last second. Yes, yeah. Right. Because this is supposed to be Ruffalo, which is an everyday Ruffalo. Oh, yeah, this is like low and lazy. Ruffalo's done this. Yeah, exactly. We've seen Ruffalo do this a few times. And I, you know, he probably would have been

fine. Sure. This is just a nice little moment for Waukeen here. But yeah, I do love the, we're in the Harry Potter closet under the stairs, which is very funny. And now the thing that he's talking about because he's been up all night. Melwig's up in the couch, but he's been up all night watching the footage, the coverage, whatever. And he's like, oh, by the way, uh, so they've disappeared. But we think they're still there because we saw

this bird fly and then it like smashed and fell and they found the bird and had like a broken neck. So now we think they're using cloaking devices basically. And what's awesome is he says they've been replaying that bird video all day. And then it cuts to the TV. And I think it's very interesting. Like, you're waiting, you're expecting to see it, and all he shows you is it's just news footage, and they have like a camera on the skies of Mexico City and you don't see the bird tape.

Like, I just, I like that playing with the expectation of like, well, Joaquin just said it, so now M. Knight's going to show it to us. Coming up after the ball game, that bird that died, got to do a shit com. According to Wikipedia, I didn't look further into it, but there was a deleted scene where after Mel comes back from Ray Reddy's house,

he finds, like, a dead bird. Oh, interesting. Force fields. Interesting. Because that's the other thing you don't see, right? I mean, so much of the end of the movie is them hiding in the basement. There is not a thing you get in so many alien movies. The ship, right? The ship overhead of the main character, which is what you... Especially since, like, you... That night, he's reading, he's looking at the book with the kids before they go to bed, and it's like, that house looks like ours, and it's a spaceship obliterating of farmhouse. The two little bodies on the cell. The crispy critters! Oh, what an illustration. It reminds you, remember when I think it's the Homer is a vigilante episode, the house that

gets up on stilts and walks away. It burns. The family falls out. Yes. I do like that. You get to call from Ray, Randy, that he's got to come over right away. And, you know, he's like, I guess,

well, he just says, he suspects it to him. Father. Yeah, well, because you all, there's only one dude in town that sounds like, father. on the phone. Ray Reddy's on the horn. I'm going to go see what he's going on about there. And everybody's still just like watching TV.

And they, this is the only thing of significance here is Bo is like, oh, Morgan's, I had a dream that Morgan died. I don't want you to die. Yeah. So we go to Ray Reddy's house. I have to make an admission here, Stephen. I don't

hate this scene. Oh, come on. I would have rathered he not do it. Sure. Of course. I think he does what I need that performance to do here It's so distracting And it is also so In a movie that is filled with great

Even Merritt fucking Weaver as like Pharmacy Girl is great Barrett fucking Weaver should do this scene You can be in the pharmacy You can say douchebag Sure But I see what you're saying though Steve Because I see what both of you are saying

Because on the one hand Chris I think to your point He does what the scene needs him to do. Sure. And it's not awful. But to Steve, to your point, you're just like, that's the director, that's the director, that's the director, that's the director, that's the director, that's the director, that's the whole time.

That's the problem with M-9 in general, even in trap, I'm like, oh, I'm like, eh, there he is. Well, that's his job. That's his dirt, there he is. Yeah, I think that it was my issue the first time I saw it, and then, like, second or third time, I just stopped. It didn't hit me that. It didn't bother me like that. I will say it distracted me back in the day, way less so today, so I do see both sides. Well, because now we have the one, because I still think, if you had to rank him,

I still think the worst one is Lady in the Water because he writes himself as the guy who writes the screenplay that launches the revolution of the universe. And you're just like, dude, stop sniffing. That one, that one, the airbender and he's an airbender? No, no, no, no. That one, the airbender, and the one he did right after, and after Earth. Those three, I don't think are getting reclaimed. I think those are staying on the garbage pile.

I'm pretty sure. Lady in the water, occasionally somebody comes out of the wood. I've seen some sick fucks starting to go to back. It's shot by Deacons and it looks good. And he knows how to move a camera. These are things that trick you into thinking these. The village looks great. It's stupid as fucking sin.

This is kind of the stuff that has fallen by the wayside. Like you don't have most movies don't look like Deacons, you know? So you could, I feel like that's the avenue to reclaim something like that. Yeah. Should call out, by the way. we're talking cinematographers. This was shot by the great Tak Fujimoto.

Incredible. Talk's amazing. I've actually, I've met Talk before. He worked with Jonathan Demi a lot. Yeah, yeah. Shot the vast majority of J.D.'s movies. And this movie looks fucking on.

I would actually want to look up to see if Talk worked with Eminet on any other movies. But this is for a movie that again, like you pointed out, Eric, like it could just be a play. Those are always so fucking boring to look at those kinds of movies. I think a lot of the cinematography choices really sort of lift it out of that.

The other thing with Shaman is that he actually does switch up his DPs pretty regularly. Oh, that's interesting. Working with Maktipram on Trap, like, that's a different visual language than this, then Unbreakable, then totally, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And the village, to what you're like, like, Deacons with a lady in the water and the village who was village? I'll look it out. I think, I think Deacons was also a village.

Deacons, it might have been also deacons, but like he just, I like that he has those there's variety to him. Oh, sure. And I'm there opening night, not opening night, but I'm there opening weekend for any of his movies. Raj, Raj did also lends the village. That's great. I do think if IMDB is to be believed.

Okay. Mel didn't know until the scene was shot, until they were shooting the scene, that M. Knight was going to be Ray Reddy. Which I want to believe that. All right. So who do we got? Are you fucking serious?

We got J.K. Simmons coming out here or what do we? Who's, maybe Jeremy. Maybe Jeremy are. No, Mel, Mel, it's going to be a lot of fun. It's me and you today, buddy. Yeah, you're going to be directing and who's going to... I'm also ready, ready. I'm going to direct the scene and I'm Ray ready.

I'm ready to do ready. When we were reading, I thought you were just running my lines for you. And you're going to do that. I was constantly saying during the table read, I'm ready to do ready. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. Like, just like that. Because I am ready. I'm ready. I'm ready to do Ray, ready.

I'm going to hang out in my trailer for a little while. I'll be ready for the... Don't worry, M. night, I'm about to be very difficult. One of my classic tantrums, here it comes. Town will freak out. Does someone want to get out of a 2002 cell phone?

You're going to want to have an old priest and a new priest. Here's a better way to shoot this scene. He goes to Ray Reddy's house. And who's behind the wheel? It's Ray Reddy, but it's Silent Bob. And he doesn't say anything. It's Kevin Smith with a big

sad, cloud phase. Wait a minute. Are you sure this wasn't MTV movie award Wait I don't know Oh man I actually had a false memory Of this scene ending

With M. Night blowing his brains out in the truck I definitely Then I would love it So when does he kill himself? I'm going to the lake house in the sky It's basically just You know I'm sorry for what I did to you and yours

It has only been six months And I don't know I don't know what I would get to writing that card you know what i mean it was me that's the good thing about it in this town i'd be so fucking far moving is priority one i had your phone number next to the phone for six months i kept i wanted to do this he couldn't do it until an alien attacked him and then he just called it or whatever but and then you know he explains like oh i trapped one of them in the pantry i'm going to the lake house i think they don't like water right so here's our water thing yeah he gets the

little water clue and then yeah he's like uh by the way before I, again, I'm going to peel out once again here, so anyway, I take a step back from my car, but yeah, I locked one in the pantry. Good luck with that, bye movie. Yeah, he almost runs him over it. I got to take out the whole fucking family with my big SUV. And we should say

I remember this wrong, but it's even worse. He's not even a drunk driver, he just fell asleep by the wheel. That's even worse. Yeah, if you're going to fall asleep on the wheel, I have a drink. No, no, no, I mean, it's worse for him. Like, if you're a drunk, like, and it's worse as a thing could hate. Well, that's what the speech is about.

What's funny is he says he was working so hard all day. Like, you're a veterinarian. Well, I think what was happening there, they were shooting the HBO series Luck and he was called out to the set. These things are dropping like fucking flies out here. He's in horse surgery all day. Exactly.

Spent six hours working on a horse's leg and then they just shot it. It's a real waste of a day. It would be better if it was QT behind the wheel and he's just explaining things through pop culture? Oh, totally. Yeah, he's going off about some black exploitation flicking if he doesn't have his eyes on the run. What the fuck, man?

And then just fucking rails her. And this is where we cut back to Merrill in the, in the closet. And he watches the birthday party sequence. The startling footage out of Brazil. Which is so. Vaminos. Vomanos children. Dude, him saying Fominos is very funny.

It is so good. This, like, found footage type of effect of displaying this alien crossing a little alleyway. This is amazing. I think this is one of the, not even just for me, but like for the audience. I remember very, very vividly seeing this movie in theaters in. August of 2002, and the audience went ape shit. Same, yeah. Were you at the tech?

Yeah, wouldn't we say? Oh, yeah, I was there was a bad thunderstorm this night. It was the same night, Martin McFly, went back to the future, I believe. There was a huge fucking thunderstorm in our town, and it was the Thursday before the movie opened. So all the, you know, like we did, all the kids gathered, you know, late at night to watch the movie. And, like, as this scene is going on, like, we see the alien and all the kids start screaming, the storm knocked the power out of the theater everything goes dark the emergency floodlights

goes up and there was like 15 upstate New York teenagers shitting their pants That was during the introduction of the alien Yeah the alien went by and we were like Holy fucking shit that all the kids are screaming That happened to me I've probably told this before but on When I saw Castaway in the theater

Right as the plane is crashing the FedEx plane and the theater goes dead It's got these flashing I thought I was an immersive experience now this is some 40X I can pay it exactly yeah

but yeah this is just amazing I would love any Portuguese speakers out there have the translation on a while all these kids

are yelling about at the birthday party I'd love to know that's pretty great it's a really great effective it's a perfect way to reveal

the alien without revealing it and you actually I mean you see I remembered this dude being way smaller yes yes

this is a jacked thing out of fucking devian art dude you see this thing fucking Lois Griffin or something. Now I want to draw that. Send that in. Sure. The alien Stupin Lois. So we're back at the veteran office. Yes. He's, I am a police officer. The police are the paddy wagon is here. Paddy wagon. That's Mel playing a character that's bad at

pretending to be a cop is very funny. It's good. Smart move. Because you know he's got the skills to reel off those things and make it sound legit, but it's funnier that he sucks at it. And it's an alien behind the door and it doesn't understand me saying anyway. Takes the butcher knife for the reflection to see what's there. Great move right here. Great fucking move. And then like getting the close up on Mel, like, because you're like, oh, he's got

the knife. Yes. What's going on? Like, is he going to try to fight this thing? And they have the close up of the knife and he moves it and he gets his face in it and looks at it and you're like, oh, he just wants to see. It's again, this this movie avoiding violence at all cost is really, really interesting. Like no guns.

Pacifist guy. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, you know, you think like this is his turning moment, but he just wants to get a little... He's just going to start... I'm going to kill something at Ray Reddy's house. Well, that, I mean, it's interesting the idea of like the, like a tool of reflection being used for violence,

which is what? Church, a lot of religion are. Oh, look at you, go. Look at this. I want to read this paper. Do you watch this twice today or what? No, no. Please, someone, hire him for the booklet. I think it would be good. I honestly do.

Another booklet, yeah. And, uh, Speaking of church, he carves up this alien's hand like fucking Bishop Ruchman. He does get the Bishop Rushman. I didn't even fucking think about it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Totally.

The alien like puts its hand out and he just chops it down. You see these little CGI piglets come right off. I'm taking them figgies. Those are coming with me. At least one's coming. I had another false memory of him showing fucking Joaquin Phoenix. Like, look what I did at the veterinarian's office. This could be the beginning of the alien wars.

Maybe you wanted around your necklace. Oh, sure. This first. kill this guy. It's like when a restaurant puts up the first dollar they made. Graham, that's starting to smell, man. It's going to be worth something for sure. Yeah, you're going to sell that

off to the government. Hey, you want to study this? Ten million dollars, please. You get two fingers, two kids go to college. That's what that works. That would be amazing. If he's like, oh, God, I can't believe I have this. I'm going to put it in the freezer, make sure it's all taken care of. What? Rudeau. It's disintegrated. Why did it disintegrate?

I'd be interested in eating this. them, right? I guess you could, they couldn't put them in a stew or anything, right? They'll dissolve. Yeah, you want to. But like, throw them on the grill. It's got to be straight grilling. Yeah, yeah. It might be nice. A dry rub scenario. Oh, I would love a little dry rub on these guys. And you're using your fucking huge barbecue

fork to be like, see, I had to kill my dog with this because of you people. Now I'm cooking you with one. So you still use you when you wash it? Oh, yeah. Do you need to get some order on it? These are practical people. They're reusing things. I did. So you would know, has this been put on 4K? Yeah, I actually bought it for this episode.

I saw it the blue. It's a plain Jane, nothing. Although I'll say, I don't have in the studio. It's on the living room, but there is the worst looking, like the cover of it is pretty much the cover of the poster, but we're putting characters on it. And Mel is kind of fine, but the Joaquin has just been like Photoshop. He looks like an alien on the cover. It's terrible. Which is so stupid because the most striking and interesting thing about the poster is.

nobody's on it. The crop circles. Yeah, it's very cool. Exactly. It's a Mel Gibson movie that you're selling, again, based on his acting, not in his, whatever. You know what I mean? Not on it. Yeah, he's not jumping off a bridge with Danny Glover. So as to what you're saying, yeah, when the 6K comes out, call me.

I will say it's a very good looking disc. Since I've got my whole microfiber disc cleaning ritual now, it played fine, which was also. I have split on 4K and it looks great. Oh, nice. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Um, so he comes home. Now, Joaquin is also wearing a tinfoil hat. And he's like, there's a new discovery. Like, they can change colors now, too. And he's like, yeah, I kind of saw that shit firsthand. Uh, this is one who got to board up the house, uh, because they're coming. After he loses the vote to go to the, to the lake. Yeah, he gets outvoted by his own family's daughter turns out. I count for two. Ghost mom is voting too. It happens twice in this movie. This and the very, uh, the merciless dinner scene. Uh, that's what we're about to get.

but like Mel yelling at these kids it's like a duct to water in it like it's just like this like sweet dad shit I never bought but him fucking screaming at these kids I'm like that's my Mel absolutely dude it's like that line came way naturally to you huh how about that you fucking you felt a little tingled

downstairs when you were yelling at that kid didn't I mean because it's such a hairpin turn I mean like it makes sense but it's such a hairpin turn from this like really like almost jovial scene of like spaghetti sounds great yeah what do you want. I want the mashed potatoes and the French toast. I want

chicken terriacchi. This is the last meal on earth. It is a last night on earth dinner. We are dying. We are going to die today. I want a cheeseburger with bacon. Extra bacon. Yeah, exactly. And I have to say, pretty impressive that all of these ingredients were available in the house and nobody had to go out to the market

for anything. Well, you see the state of the pizza, you know, you keep a well-stocked fridge in the pantry. Not a lot of dining out in this town. This family has a second freezer. That's for sure. Oh, yeah, that's a farm living Right there Chicken terriaki though

Like is this like Are we making the sauce ourselves No It's like an 80's frozen It's a bottle It's your cooking chicken Yeah It's ketchup and soy sauce

You are doing like those 90 second Uncle Ben's like rice packets Which I'm not knocking We use those all the time in this house But like it's that It's you grill some chicken It's that ketchup and soy sauce together

Burger looks good French toast absolutely great Mashed potatoes always look great sure little bo that's her mistake asked for spaghetti and like that's the wrong place to ask now i was you got a vowel your name sweetheart i was really uh having my noodle boggled by this because it looked as if the way the plating worked for her spaghetti and like kids are weird with food so maybe it looked like plain pasta and then the sauce was on the side of the plate i don't know what the fuck is going on here you gotta mix that stupid girl this girl

talking about amoe water i i believe it like whatever man sure that's true yeah she is a little kid she would want like butter pasta that is it's very popular amongst the little kids and i'll have my saucy sausage on the side right right right um i do like there's a moment the second wakene cigarette moment is an interesting little bit sorry oh sorry i forgot to mention i'm about to talk about smoking everybody or maybe they'll be an executive order and we can get rid of these tobacco depiction warning, so. It would be the first thing I agreed with the mom. I'm glad that that is the warning you get at the

head at the top of the act of killing. Of course, yeah. These dudes are going to be talking about all these atrocities they did in a really calm and eerie manner, but use warning, they'll be smoking throughout a whole bunch of fucking cigarettes. Oh, you know, like me, the other night me and my wife, for we were about to, Han,

we were about to put on irreversible, you know. It said it had tobacco depictions. We couldn't watch it. I mean, I gladly watched her just getting beat with that fire extinguisher and everything but that tobacco use my dad they're gonna die in like 20 years but the second SIG thing is funny

because he's just having like a butt outside and he flicks it and this is where he picks up a rock and he throws it into the cornfield and another mismemory here like he goes inside and I was like oh the alien throws the rock back out and I was like no that's ET stupid that didn't happen in this movie

so they board up the house as best they can they realize they can't board up the bedrooms, they don't have enough boards, so they're bordering up the actual doors to the bedroom, smart. Smart, yeah, I mean, it's getting really like Night of the Living Dead right here. It is, and I mean, look, they're doing the windows. The front door has, they did it last.

Why is it just the one board on the front door? It's crazy. Yeah, well, I guess they meant to get the dog or something. They forgot. Oh, right. They certainly did forget about that poor dog. We get to hear the dog squeal and die. Probably be strangled to death by these hunky aliens.

If the dog, if the dog, lick them, and they'd be like, oh, no, we're dying. Help us. I'm fucking fight. Would blood? I mean, blood is sort of water, right? We're all made of water. It's a good question. Yeah, we're 75%. Once they start stabbing me, is my blood going to spray on them and hurt them? Well, that's

why they have the poison gas. So you don't have very... Oh, dude, I would piss in this alien's fucking face, dude. Oh, yeah. Dude, yeah, we're just throwing pee in aliens. That's how you fight them showers. I would have loved that. If that's ID4, we know how to take them down. Pish in their faces. Robert Lowe's just send word all over the world to the other

armies of this globe of ours. All you got to do is piss on them. A tidal wave of piss that consumes this globe will take this menace out of here. You know who could piss my son, David? My son David is the best of pissing. David, show them how you can piss. I have a, uh, uh, what they call a, uh, healthy stream. Hey boys, I'm back and I had coffee.

Piss. Russell, you idiot, you piss on the wrong fucking field. Yeah, we need crop dusters to piss on these aliens. Don't worry, I got two courts of Evian right here. Randy Quaid's driving his little plane, just pissing out the side of it. He's got like a funnel right under his dick that he's pissing into that he can spray it down immediately. And they will never take our asparagus appetizers. David Piss him.

David, you piss him. on the president. I thought he was an alien. Might have been a body snatcher. I gotta call my mother, I can't piss. Oh, my, the hot guy from works pissing on people, I gotta go.

I'm sorry, Mr. President, your wife had too much piss. Dude, that's... There was no saving her. Oh. Kick the tires and flush the toilet, it's big daddy. Welcome to

Earth. Let me show you something. Why does it? Because that's how I killed him. Oh, man. Yeah, so we're like, you know, gearing up for the big night. You know you're in trouble when it's 2002

and the television has gone off the air. Yeah, you're in trouble. That's probably. Yep, yep, yep. So they, it's, I think this is the, I think it's, I think it's Joaquin sees that the TV's off and he goes, it's happy. Yeah, which is a nice, like, the start of everything.

To what Eric was saying before, uh, their report, the last thing we hear before they go dead is people are running to mosques, people are running to religion, really that they are going back to places of religion. And in the basement where they go to, uh, yeah, they're all the radio stations are off, which is crazy. Yeah, all right. Yeah, everyone's gone off the air. Um, but yeah, they already, you know, they already know, they already know where here is the line and then you hear all the aliens are running on porch and, you know, all the sound design here is. like all of that like just you crank this up and like the tension here is in the sound because you don't see shit and it's just you can aliens are running around the port and everything like hey get out of the garbage get out of the garbage see this is what happens when you don't finish food what do I say about clean plates and you've got this like Joaquin sort of narrating like the progress and he's like they're on the roof yeah they're in the house and then you see the fingers come up under the door is a pretty nice little move. And that's, I think, what pushes them down to the basement for this, like, final standoff here.

And here's a big problem with this movie. Okay. Oh, I'm going to remember way late, there was a coal shoot down here. They used to put coal down here. It's so huge. It's so clearly this shit. You forgot that there was like an oven grate situation.

It looks like the boiler from home alone. Exactly. And the second thing, I was kind of screaming last night, like any human being when an intruder, a regular human intruder comes to your house, and you're ready for it, what do you do?

You grab your knife, you grab your baseball bat, wherever it is. You grab the, I don't care if it's ceremonial or not. You're walking around with this baseball bat all the time. If you wanted it, though, you don't need it because downstairs you see this shot,

like when they're going through, like looking for shit. There's literally a pile of baseball bat. There's aluminum ones down there. The real hardcore shit. Fucking everyone should have one. Rory Cucklechief, too. Bad up, baby. I have a Louisville slugger in my house just in case someone knocks on the door.

Exactly. I thought it was just in case someone invites you to go to the batting cage. No, no, no, no, no. Someone tries to bring food into your house. The batting cage is your head. So Morgan starts having an asthma attack and this is a nice, it's awkward now to watch, but it's a nice moment of Mel, you know, being a good father, like talking him, you know, down from the asthma attack.

breathe like I am and he's like fucking talking to God I hate you fucking hate you that's a weird thing to say to the kid yeah is he talking about me I'm just having an asthma attack

I'm sorry this is making me actually more panicked but the thing is like you go from like I hate you to like believe it's gonna pass believe

right hey no I don't have a trial I'm just such a Christian you know I can't can't like damn God like that I can't do it well you know that the Christian God is kind of like the Jewish

God. I fucking hate you. I fucking hate you. As soon as I tell him that the Christian God was the Jewish God, he just sort of gave the best performance of his life. It was a breakthrough. It really was a breakthrough. You know, you got to use the actor you're given. We forgot to mention that the thing that sets

off the asthma attack is actually another really quiet but eerie part where they find the coal shoot and Rory's right there and it blends in because it's like covered in soot which is a great move. And you can't like the adults are looking when the shot starts and you can see that they're like

and Rory's like what and then you see the hand move and it kind of touches him a little because the hands the skin mimics what is around it's a chameleon type of thing yeah but it's weird because later when they confronted in the living room

like Abigail Brutson's screaming like is like painted on his back yeah it's like a mirror it's a really wild thing sort of like a predator kind of thing yeah yeah it's pretty cool but to be i and this is what like the flashlight drops again very blare witchy where the cameras just kind of on the floor you just see feet running out yeah yeah um so you know he he after damming

god is able to kind of talk the kid down a little bit uh and they sort of just like go to bed and they wake up in the basement the next morning and things have sort of quieted down the kid is still like wheezing those so it's like this is still an emergency like he still needs his medication but he's not like huffing and puffing or whatever and Joaquin's like yeah he kind of started doing that a little while ago we should go up and see what's going on is this where they have the art bell guy on like that's it's come right before they go up yeah he turns on the radio

it's on yeah yeah yeah he's like they they had poison gas a lot of people have died they they came here to harvest us and then I think then they make the decision to go upstairs the radio even like there's a news brother they're running back something they did in the Middle East really worked no other news right now by the way not only did something work some primitive method because it's the Middle East what are you saying yeah it's like it's the most primitive of all maybe it was piss or spit yeah you know it's shocking

that the spit didn't come back after the skateboarding nonsense that's true like if like Watkins like spit in this yeah our news networks in the Middle East are they're just putting it's five letters over and over grand D R O O L DR. What is that? How could that even matter? The only thing that does happen in the night is Mel has the final nightmare and we get everything. I mean, this is, it's fucking brutal. And Mel and this basically a glorified extra, it was just in this one moment as the wife.

They do a really great job and it's fucking crushing. It's literally like if you've ever. It's literally crushing. It's literally crushing. It's like, if you've literally ever felt a thing for another human being. Like, this just absolutely destroys you. It's so well done. It is good.

And this is she gives all the detail here. Because she then starts, her body's shutting down and she thinks that, you know, Mel is somebody else. And it's like, oh, you know, tell Graham to, you know, just look, see, whatever you see, see, see, and tell Merrill swing away. She's not nobody. Oh, really? It's Patricia Callumberg, who is great in, she's in previous episode, Cat's Eye. Eric she is the lady who dies at the beginning of Fletch lives Oh wow yeah okay

But that's also a very small very small role But her big role was she's not the girlfriend But I think like his friend in Jacob's ladder She's like the third thing Oh Jesus okay Apparently she had a few more moments in this movie that were cut out of just like Establishing her as the mother like playing with the kids Or dancing with bow

You get that from the um Like when Mel wakes up, there's just the family photo right there. And then you see like he's alone in the bed. Which adds to the feeling of loss, then peppering her in. Right. Yeah, exactly. And the only flashback you get is of her death, which obviously. And so, you know,

it's a big, it's a big scene here and like, you know. They turn on the baby monitor. It's like, oh, no sign there. Okay. And this, the reveal here is truly fantastic. Yes. You know, it's like, okay, everybody's coming up and it's all fine. Let's get an update on the telly. And he goes to

the closet to wheel the TV back out and as he's setting it up, he turns and the alien is in the reflection of the tube TV glass. And he's got the kid. And he's got Rory. He's holding Rory Culkin. It's an awesome reveal, man. And again, just, because this is it, right?

This is the scene where we see this little fucker the most. And even in this moment, M. Knight knows enough to be like maybe the reveal is through a TV. Like, it still can look shitty on the TV and it's, you know, it's a, it looks a little different because it's on a TV. And this is Red Reddy's

fucking final revenge. Because it's the same fucking alien from his house. Yeah, yeah. That's right. Hey, Elliot, guess what? They live at 419. They finish them all. Slip the address under the door. I mean, Ray Reddy should have burned his house then maybe to kill this fucking thing. That's, yeah, you probably should have finished the job

instead of just running off. You get the Kaiser-so-say shot, but it's him calling away from the farmhouse. Well, I just had to do it. and I mean this is great and I love the alien is like holding his little like Spider-Man poison thing like just I'll fucking do it shit hey

I'll fucking kill this kid let me out and I'll fucking out shit in you know a compliment to this movie not having guns in it it's crazy as farm people yes yeah it's pretty cool but then like Mel gives it like yo that baseball bat would be helpful right around now Merrill swing away we get it

oh man I just want to hit an alien with a baseball this looks so fun it looks pretty great I do love the moment where you get alien P-O-V and he bashes it and it's all in the service of the alien falling down and then you see the water tip

on the table it's a really cool thing there was a moment before where it got hit with water and it's like this hurts it Merrill even like breaks some of the glasses and that too was a sign

the daughter was and that's what and like when you get to that's why you have asthma I go like all right it's all that it's all that it's all that God's plan bullshit coincidence or what have you

his lungs were closed when the when the spray happens. He does get sprayed and so that's the whole thing right as Mel takes him outside like oh and he's like talking himself into the scenario right he's like his lungs were closed like he couldn't breathe it he couldn't breathe it in his lungs were closed

and he was right yeah you know due to whatever yes is it prescience is it God is it luck right place at the right time screenwriting there's a bunch of things screenwriting could have been the culprit Absolutely. He comes to eventually.

Did somebody save me? I think somebody did. Yeah. And in that moment, you're like, all right, his faith is restored. Like, in that line, you're like, nah. Which I don't think you need the last shot. You don't, but it underlines it for the audience. It's fine.

I actually would have preferred him not say the line and still get the last shot. I agree with that. You should do both. It is, yeah. I mean, it is a cool thing where, like, it's a nice effect shot of, like, the camera just sort of panning. And, well, it's like a swivel kind of move. And it goes through the house. when you see the windows on the other side

now it's snowing so you know the time is past and yeah it would have been a good wait what if suddenly he like became Islam or something she gets his rug out hey David Middle East figured it out first oh I would like that but I do like the fact that it is all

it's male in complete silence and Chris what you pointed out earlier in the episode you the only thing you hear is the kids playing and having fun and being happy and safe and you know order such as it is is restored he found his faith and oh look it works for him and so that's fine

now he's got a bunch of fucking people whose families have died from poison gas from the area you really have a bunch of questions you have to answer it's good you have new questions it's not the same old like oh my brother is knocked up his girlfriend again but now you know he's got

like the experience with having lost in his life and now his community has lost so maybe he can comfort them in some way that as bad as God's plan is or whatever it is. I just refuse to believe that when aliens come and take a bunch of us and kill more of us

and there's ships all over the sky and everything and they leave we're still going to be like, yeah, some other invisible thing made this planet in seven days. Like with COVID, we're going to go more, I guarantee we would go crazy religious. This book that doesn't have any of it in it, it must

be the answer? Yeah. Well, they're ancient astronauts. I see, yes. And they're back to kill us, but I want to worship them. I more believe the ancient astronaut theory than I do anything about Jesus Christ I absolutely do. Bite your tongue. But that is the end of M. Night Shyamalan's

signs. We'll go around the horn here for some final thoughts. Eric Siska. Yeah, a good movie. I was kind of worried about how it would hold up after all these years because I haven't seen it in a while. I always remember this being one of my more preferred M. Knights and pretty much stuck that way.

I mean, I just I was blown away, but not like blown away, but like, see Mel Gibson acts. Yes. And really go for it. It was nice to see, and I know he's a bad guy. Don't comment. Okay? All right. It's a make-beloing. How dare you?

How dare you? It's a movie. I'd love to think that I'm like legitimately helping. If I could be the kind of person that legitimately thinks they're helping a situation by being like, did you know Mel Gibson's bad? Internet. We get it all the time. But yes, recommend for me. Chris Cabin. Oh, huge recommend. I really love this movie.

I have I mean I think I've talked about either on OSL or I just I flipped on him I like most of his work now I there are the ones that are just unsalvageable to me like the airbender nobody's going after that fucker

I cannot believe people are going to Bapar Lady in the water I too love how it looks and love parts of it but it is a movie that is a disaster yet hot dog suicide hotline you were ready to come around that I would do that that's fine

After Earth is a total wreck That was a boner jam of a movie But most of the time It's just him doing his little movies like this And like trap and like old Where it's just like an interesting little premise Blown out and given all of his little idiosyncrasies It works for me now

It really does and I think that was a matter of faith It's a matter of do you believe this guy is making art Or are you just like out of it And trying to make a score of how this works versus the Robert McKee book is like This is not how it's supposed to be The book told me this is how you're supposed to make the movie

that guy should have got fucking Gaddafi too it poisoned the industry it really did uh and like that's the thing is like now I have faith that he is doing this stuff because it's his stuff it's what he does and what he's interested in and so it rings more true to me I'd rather this dude make movies

that he wants to make versus like getting hired by Disney to make something he doesn't oh my god totally he's don't I mean yeah that's for you know for better he's a guy that makes his own ideas and that's a rarity to And the one time he adapted an IP was... Disaster.

Everybody hate disaster. I'm glad he's out there doing what he's doing. You know what I mean? Like, whether I... And I'm, you know, mid on Chamelon, but I'm... I like enough of them and I enjoy the experience of, like, figuring them out and going through them. Even if I don't like it, I'm going to watch it and be like, oh, that fucking sucked them. But that was fun.

You know what I mean? Like, there's something to it. There's something... There's meat on the bone there, as opposed to literally air, which a lot of... movies are today. And I feel like this movie is an interesting rewatch. I like this movie a lot. I think I like a little less now.

I'm still a huge Unbreakable Head. Love Sixth Sense. This one, for whatever reason, like, it is just like the movie is the twist. And like the fact that like every single thing at the end of the movie has to come back. Right. While you're watching it, it does make the movie feel a bit threadbare in terms

of like other stuff. Like, even like the village has a ton of other stuff. Even though I don't like it I like that there's other stuff there here it is it is so like I want to get from point A to point B and point B is going to really shock you and it's and it works and again like he makes mountains out of mole hills the tension

is there the jump scare isn't great it's just sort of like for that's my light criticism on the movie why I was like just okay just liked it a lot as opposed to loved it yeah yeah no this was this was a nice revisit it had been a long

long time I remembered, like, liking it back in 2002, and I really like it now. I don't regret doing a, I guess, pseudo-blind buy for the 4K. It's a great-looking movie with some performances from some, you know, great people and from a piece of shit. Who's really good in this movie. One movie that didn't come up in the talking of the filmography, has anyone seen that found footage The Visit movie? It's really good. Is it good?

It is good. Was that his first Apple thing? That was, like, his first, like, now, like, nobody wants to. give him like he made it all on his own yeah that's right and it's again there is oh wait I mean Eric would die because there is a disgusting shit boy in there that would give you a

heart attack well I'll have to check it out that one would freak you out it's uh it is a rapping a disgusting shit boy oh that's terrible yeah rapping white boy so yeah that is not great but I think the movie is good

alright maybe I'll check that out this it's the only movie it is I'm pretty sure that I have It was the last one I saw. But that is going to do it for this episode on Signs. That is going to do it for Wait What You Airy. This was a lot of fun to do. Nice little curated month for everybody. But if you want more We Hate Movies, including ad-free episodes of WHM proper,

head over to the Patreon. Patreon.com slash We Hate Movies where, yeah, every week, these that you're listening to right now, the WHMs, they're on there, commercial free. We also, as part of Wait What You Arey did Donnie Darko for We Love Movies. That's on the Patreon. on. We did a, let's see, it's out, yeah, it's got to be out by now. Of course, the Gleap Blossary on the best executive assistant in the galaxy. Oh my God, yes,

it was on, oh god, we were, Lobot. We did this last night. I don't know what the hell is going on. Yes, Lobot. We did Lobot and our thoughts on the skeleton crew, which was on Disney Plus. That's right. Also on animation, damnation, we're getting into the Valentine's Day spirit. Hey, Arnold, you'll believe a big fucking headed dude could have two girlfriends at once.

Yes, and you know, I was surprised I've never seen, Hey Arnold, not a bad show. Yeah, fun of a little show that still holds up all these years later. The Nexus, still going through it on Toastus and TNG. That's always a good time. Melro 210 this month was the start of the Daddy Wars. Yes.

Jack and Jim and Mel just fucking getting into trouble. Because the Daddy Wars has. And if you want a distraction from the world, I think 902 and Melrose place is a lot of fun. So watch along with us as we week. cap that series both series is uh and because we do too much

fucking shit on the patron there's almost too much to do we did a whole lifetime movie called one hot tall tall hot blah there it is catfishing to beat the band that movie is available for free on YouTube and to be in the United States it's a lot of fun as well check out that movie and listen to the show

massive recommendation so next month there's going to be all sorts of stuff to look forward to including our commentary on David Finch the game, which we've recorded, and that is a ton of fun. You are not going to want to miss when that comes out in March. But also, speaking of March, of course, it kicks off listener request month. And Steve Saneck, we're in a little bit of hot soup at the moment.

We were recording this before our live drawing on on-screen live, which is a fun YouTube show. We do every Monday, mostly every Monday, every Monday at noon, Eastern, where we review box office stuff. but now we kind of shove any kind of cool stuff that we do live on there. So we are going to draw the entire month's offerings. We just haven't done it yet. We haven't done it. But we would have done it by the time this comes out. So go to YouTube.com slash we hate movies and watch the show where the 17th,

February 17th show, where we do all the listener request wrongs. You'll know the whole lineup, not only of the main feed, but as well as the Patreon. So tune in there to hear what we're going to talk about. about next week it's probably going to be ready to rumble honestly the numbers are pretty damn it always gets a lot you're ready to rumble numbers are intimidated so until next week with i don't know fingers crossed ready to rumble i've been andrewitt stephen say it at eric ciscus take it easy Thank you.

Thank you.