We Hate Movies - S15 Ep818: Pretty Woman (Live in Boston)

Episode Date: August 26, 2025

Recorded December 4, 2024 at Laugh Boston - Boston, MA “Could I get some ‘directions’ over here?” - Eric On the final Summer Live episode this season, it’s our show from last year in Boston chatting about the rom-com classic, Pretty Woman! What kind of high society rich-guy party hires a close-up magic performer? Why did they write Julia’s character to act like a space alien? How about that McDLT commercial?! And did Garry Marshall push for Hector Elizondo to play E.T.? PLUS: The super-mega-sized finale of the VHS Trailer Game!  Pretty Woman stars Julia Roberts, Richard Gere, Jason Alexander, Ralph Bellamy, Laura San Giacomo, Alex Hyde-White, Amy Yasbeck, and Hector Elizondo as Barney Thompson; directed by Garry Marshall. Don’t sleep on snagging your tickets to our 15th Anniversary show this December where we’re talking all things Arnold in Total Recall! It’s gonna be a gas and we wanna see you there! Click through for tickets now! Throughout 2025, we’ll be donating 100% of our earnings from our merch shop to the Center for Reproductive Rights. So head over and check out all these masterful designs and see what tickles your fancy! Shirts? Phone cases? Canvas prints? We got all that and more! Check it out and kick in for a good cause! Original cover art by Felipe Sobreiro.

POMAYOR. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know what I'm going to be. I don't know. ...wis... ...withal...

...and... ...and... ...and... ...the... ...the... ...the... ...the... You know, I think what we're going to have to do, guys,

is just split the fireworks fine four ways. No one remembers whose firework got the cops called on us. But no, no, no, but mine is Sparkle Panther. I had that one. I was very specific. I wanted that one. Oh, I had the full-frame DVD of Bottle Rocket. I was hucking at the cops.

Oh, that's probably what did it. Oh, the cool thing is I don't need to split the fine because I'm an informant. So that actually was, oh, that's how, wow. Yeah, yeah, I was the guy who called. But guys, wait, do you, do you hear that? What is that? Oh, oh, oh, fellas. We have come to the end of the road, as I think boys to men once said,

proclaimed loudly. We are here at the VHS trailer. game of derung and we are going to do three little games here to decide the fate of our guys here. Hold on. I am going to get the numbers up because I need to have those. Numbers are important. Scoreboard. By the way, well, Chris gets that up. I'll just say winner lose. Everyone's winning today because after this VHS trailer game, you are going to get us live in Boston talking about Pretty Woman, which good gravy. That was a hell of a show last year.

So much fun. We had such a great time revisiting that movie and talking about that movie and coming up with perspectives on that movie. Oh, we did indeed come up with perspectives. It's always the spiciest shows that your family winds up going to. I had my mother-in-law in attendance for that one. And I was like, that's great. Come to Pretty Woman.

That's cool. Like, you know. Come to the sex work rom-com. we're not going to be weird about it or nothing. I have never had a family member ever attend a show. So there you go. That's what you do.

Dude, that's the way to be. Yes. You just tell them, oh, now it's sold down. Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, no. It's sold down again. Oh, then they see there's 50 tickets. Oh, those are reserved. Yeah. Yeah. Our friend Mike is going to show up and he likes to spread his legs. So there's

okay there we go I can't vamp anymore could feel the the vamp running on fumes there Chris oh my vamp was going great I don't know I called the cops I wouldn't say great so we have currently

Eric sitting pretty at 28 yeah 28 points later Eric Siska look at me oh apocalypse you know what at least I'm not in the 27 club it's true hey you know what What? That's good. That's blessings up.

Uh, 40. Andrew is doing very nice with the 46 right now. Okay. Uh, and Steve is, uh, doing more than okay with a 70. Uh, three. What? I, I, you know, what?

Were you getting me out like 10 points at once? When the hell? I feel like Dave McFly. When the hell did this happen? Yeah, yeah. Your fucking ears open, man. No, no, no. If I had gotten to scoreboards at the top of all these games. that would have had the motivation to get out of course hustle all right let's just do it are you ready wow wow okay yes yeah that's right all right so we're going to go screwing around the first level is just normal uh it's going to be 10 10 questions uh as a normal vhs trailer game we're going to start number one this remake of a french crime comedy pairs a rough voiced hunk and a currently thriving comedic legend as they go on the run with a surprising third wheel.

Oh, oh, fuck. I think I know the shit on that. Oh, is it? You got to raise it, is it little criminals? No, it is not.

But I think it's close to it. Can I hear the clue again, please, Game King? This remake of a French crime comedy pairs a rough-voiced hunk and a currently thriving comedic legend as they go on the run with a surprising third wheel.

I'm going to kick it. Yeah, let's kick it. The original had come out only three years ahead of this one and even enjoyed a short run in the States. It was directed by Francis Weber, who also directed this movie, and the original star Gerard de Bordeaux and Pierre Richard. Oh, wow.

Hmm, totally did not help. Depardue, you say. That can be anything. That pig was in a lot of movies. I saw this. I saw this movie. I got the title wrong. No, you didn't. You didn't see it. You don't know what you're talking about. You have no clue what's going on. You don't know where you are. He likely comfortably has IMDB open if he's looking that up, by the way. I'm just going to put that out of it.

That's how 70 points. Mr. fucking 75 points. All of us. I was out of it. I wanted to Google what the title was. And are you back out of it? I'm very out of it. Uh, well, let's kick it, Chris. Let's kick it again. Okay.

The tagline, they rob banks, she steals hearts. Mm-hmm. Ooh. Oh, thank you. No. I feel like, oh. They rob banks. She steals hearts.

Who that she is. What are we thinking here, fellas? Who could that be? Can I be an adult or younger than an adult? Oh. Oh. Yeah, I thought it was one, but it's not. Okay.

Okay. Yes, yes. In the poster for this movie, Nick Nulte is valiantly carrying one of his co-stars, but not the one you'd expect. Hmm. Okay. Jesus fucking Christ with this shit.

I don't know. I just want to get this over with another 48 hours. No, let's continue. Wow. Oh, my God. Did you just happen before this? They just say the title. We're out.

Okay, the first one was three fugitives. Three fugitives. Three fugitives. It's a very obscure. It's like an 80s dramedy deal. Where are these coming from, by the way? These are just random movies or what? This is from the pretty woman VHS.

Ah, pretty woman VHS. Oh, yes. This is straight from the source, baby. Oh, I love that. So we'll go to number two then. The lead of this 1989 education drama was nominated for the awesome. but lost to Daniel Day Lewis. The film did win one

Oscar, though, for best original screenplay. Oh, man. I'm kind of thinking I know what it is, but I want to fucking blow it. Can I hear the clue again, Game King? Of course. The lead of this 1989

educational drama was nominated for the Oscar, but lost to Daniel Day Lewis. Oh, Eric. Stand in the deliver? No. Andrew? Lean on me. No.

Oh, shit. Those are both things I was thinking it was going to be. I'll kick it then. I got nothing. Okay. Among the plethora of young actors in the film is a Richard Linklater favorite. Stephen? It is. It is, blah, blah, blah. It is indeed. Oh, that was 89.

Actually, you buzzed in with blah, blah, blah. Then you said it I was watching Jeopardy the other day And they It was the clue It was final Jeopardy The clue The final answer was

Bush v. Gore The Supreme Court decision And some lady said Gore v. Bush And they said you ain't getting shit Sweetheart Whoa Yeah

That in the wrong order Well Is that alphabetical For law people Is that the thing? I guess the decision Yeah The decision is the decision

So yeah It's it's wild well and then that that that decision led us here grace oh it sure did wonderful wonderful to think of history um okay next one this crime comedy pairs a recent west anderson favorite uh as a cop with the pet of a recent victim yeah Andrew Turner and Hooch Correct Tom Hanks started being in

Wes Anderson movies Right right right All right So next one everybody up All right For all is memorable elements This drama about a chaotic Years Long friendship only got an Oscar

nomination for art and set decoration did you ever know that it is beaches yeah wow how how did you know it is multi-generational friendship drama friendship dramas is our late 80s yeah uh i think this well fried green tomato is not exactly um okay next one guys uh this inaugural volume in a long running comedy franchise finds our affable hero dash moron taking up a hallowed summertime job I love the guy's name was dash moron so did I and then I stopped listening to the rest of the question yeah do you want me to repeat would be okay yes please the this inaugural volume

in a long running comedy franchise finds our affable hero moron taking up a hallowed summer summertime job summer time job comedy franchise comedy franchise is really from from the 90s this is late 80s not early 90s

summertime job god damn I think I might punt you want a punt let's do want a punt okay these these comedies rarely got big names in the supporting cast.

This one topped out with John Vernon best known for playing the evil dean in Animal House. Yes, yes, yes. I didn't want to put sweet movie in there

because I don't know how many people have actually seen it. You don't know how many Dusan McAveev heads are out of this? I just don't know. It's weird

that John Vernon's in that fucking movie. And I say beaches and they're like, what's this robot talking about? I don't even know what the fucking words you just said. Taking a dive right now.

Here are you. I got nothing. You guys like nothing? I'm going to kick myself. The star of this comedy hasn't shown up in much aside from these films with the notable exceptions of a fruitful Pixar franchise

and an adaptation of an old TV comedy show. Oh, Christ on the cross. Somehow it gets harder with that. I don't know. I didn't think it was supposed to go that way. I was so confused. Fuck. I'm trying to think of fucking John Vernon movies and like killer clowns from outer space

is not a comedy franchise. You all are going to scream when you hear this. I bet. A summer time job though. Like what? And that's a franchise. Every movie it's about the summertime job. Not every,

no, not every movie is about that job. Is this the first in a series or is this a middle movie? Yes. This is the first. The first of the series. Fuck me. I got nothing I got nothing too Same

Okay Following this film The affable hero would go on To get framed and imprisoned Fight mythical monsters Oh And help Santa Claus Steven

It is Ernest Goes to Camp Yes it is indeed Wow Yeah There it is Okay Ernest goes to camp You know honestly

If you had asked me Like what the first Ernest movie was I don't know that if I would have remembered I would have fucking said jail probably Or Christmas, frankly At first I think I thought it was Christmas But I was like, it was one of those two I don't think I've seen her this goes to camp

Really? There's a pet hurdle bites as those Oh, that's fun Great There's a fucking earnest documentary coming out I saw It's in post. Oh wait, are they do Is John Cherry part of it as well? I hope so I can tell you Okay, next one guys

Yeah All right This parental comedy pairs a well-known cop-show veteran with a Cheers heavyweight and a comedy franchise alumni and was a former W-H-M episode.

Hmm. And former episode. I'm cross-referencing the cast of cheers with former episodes is my route here. What's the clue there? One more time. Okay. This parental comedy pairs a well-known cop-show veteran with a Cheers Heavyweight

and a comedy franchise alumni and was a former WHM episode. Cheers Heavy. Is it Steven? Is it Madhouse?

No. Oh, nice. It's a good guess. Wow, that's really fucking digging back, too. You want to kick it. Yeah, let's kick it. This unexpected

mega hit starred TV royalty and was also directed by TV royalty. Unexpected. I actually have no idea. I feel like I'm going to budd wire myself here. I'm sorry, I did not mean to do that. No, it's all right. It's always because of other reasons, Chris. Don't worry about it. Oh, man, so fucking episodes with cheers, people.

Let's kick it again. Yeah, fuck this. The title of the film is literally what the movie is. well aside from the Andrew now what are your little wells what were you about to say fuck money train

god damn let's hear that let's hear that let's hear that the title of the film is literally what the movie is well aside from the drug running ah no drug running and money train just money running

hmm and drug running movie we've done that's a comedy with uh cheers actors Yep. And a cop show alum. Cop show. Yeah.

From the 80s. Yeah. I still got nothing. All right. Fuck it. You win, Chris. You win. Tagline, this should do it. They changed her diapers. She changed their lives. Baby days out or whatever. Baby's day out.

No. Did we even do that? No. No. It's, oh, it's three men and a baby. Steven, you aren't... I know, but he... I'm out. He guessed. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, it's three

minute of a baby. It's three minute a babe. Oh, and directed by Len Nimoy. Yeah, for zero points. For zero point. I know it's zero points. I know it's... No, no, that's too. I forgot about the... Who's from the cop... Who's from the cop TV show? Isn't... It's a... What's his name?

Fucking... I'm in Blankberg? No, no, Tom Selleck is... Selleck. Oh, Selleck. Magnapion. I was about to be like, Chris, Police Academy isn't a fucking TV show. Exactly. I was about to do it. God, damn. Oh, man, brutal.

I need you to get an air conditioner in there. Dude, it's in here, okay? It's not helping, okay. It's in here and it's working great. I feel quite comfortable physically. Sure. Cocktail. Uh, fuck.

Did you just fucking say the movie? Cocktail, I buzz in cocktail, cocktail. Give her it five points a cocktail No you each get three for that Oh wow That's funny I don't say I've almost done that a million times Doing this is that right

Yeah just look at it you're like oh it's this right oh no way Oh I love it Okay Actual next one now This comedy stars a beloved Cheers veteran Who is brought back from the dead by witchcraft Oh Christ

Cheers Veteran Brought Back from the Dead by Witchcraft You guys know I never watched Cheers I just want to lay that out there Yeah Oh I did not know that I'm sorry Wow

Brought back to life No this is not a None of these are movies somehow I don't want to Let's kick it I'm gonna kick it I'm gonna kick it well yeah I got nothing The

The ingratiating title of this film is funny considering it was directed by the notorious Frank Perry, director of such controversial dramas as last summer and Mommy Dearest. Well, Mommy Dearest I've heard of. Last summer, you would probably love last summer.

Is that right? Oh. Very unnerving. Cheers alum brought back from the dead by witchcraft, you say. I would love to watch a Rea Pearlman like living voodoo doll movie. Is it living voodoo doll? is this what's the genre what's the genre it's a comedy it's a comedy yeah get those pins out of my ass yeah i got nothing i got nothing okay let's go tagline number one uh her life hasn't been the same since her death death fuck about that i'm like thinking of one but i'm like thinking

of one thing, but I'm like, I know you weren't on Cheers. That's kind of been my problem, too. Right, because it's her and yeah. Yeah. I got nothing. Yeah. Got nothing. All right, guys.

Shelly Long starred in this film the same year she made outrageous fortune and year after she made the money pick. Oh, it's one of those bizarre Shelley Long 80s movies. This is a nightmare. Yeah, oh, this is a fucking total no man's land.

Because it's not Troop Beverly Hills. No, they're not, Beverly Hills. It is not that. Fuck. I got nothing. I don't know these movies. Same. All right.

Okay, this is hello again. Oh, hello. I've even seen that movie. How did I fuck? You're right. I've not seen that. So Shelly Long was in Cheers. Yeah.

She was who got replaced by Kirstie Allie. Like, she left the show to go make movies. And Kirstie Allie. came on the show. Interesting. The David Caruso, they call that. Yeah,

I have not seen, I've not seen a single episode of shows. Wow, that's surprising. All right. Honestly, dude, I think you'd really like it. It is just,

even just go through it now. Sit back and just, you like, enjoy yourself be on the phone half the time. Some of the best, like, joke writing. Uh,

anyway. All right. We have only two more left, guys. All right. This movie stars a long time heartthrob, which makes its central premise

of paying for dates all the harder to buy. So he's paying for dates? He is indeed. And he's a heart throb? He is a heartthrob, yes. Was the trailer

for Pretty Woman on? Is it risky business? Is this a cheers actor? Are he cheers? It's a cheers watcher. I will say in his later years he's become a big deal on

TV. Okay. Can I hear the clue again? Sure. The movie stars a long-time heartthrob, which makes its central premise of paying for dates all the harder to buy. All right. So it's not what I was thinking of because they're paying for him. So that's not. Exactly. I was thinking the same thing. It's not lover boy. If you're thinking of it. Yes, I was thinking it was lover boy. I was waiting for a clue about a pizza delivery guy. He would never be that. He would never be that cut and dry with a clue. No, no, no. It's got to be, who was this? He worked with a PA on this French movie.

Yes. I just have this list of production assistance right here. This film shares a title with the Beatles song. There's a lot of those. Yes. Is it Helter Skelter? No, Stephen. Okay, so it's a, he's a heartthrob, but he's pain.

for sex and it's a Beatles song. I didn't say sex. Paying for dates. Dates. I think I know the title, but I don't know the movie because I just remember knowing the title. Andrew?

Is it? Can't buy me, love? It is indeed. Oh, there's something. I've not seen it. Is that Rob Lowe? No, no. It's a, what's his? It's also fucking... Yeah, lover boy.

Oh, it's Patrick's. So he's always paying for sex in all of his movies. or someone's paying some... There's a transaction somewhere. Very transactional guy, it seems. Uh-huh, I see. All right, guy.

This is the last one of this round. Only two other rounds after this. I love it. Everybody ready? Yes. Yep. Okay. This revenge film stars a recently mentioned veteran of TV work

who relished playing a wrong man type after finding purchase mainly in family films. Say that again? Sure. This revenge film stars a, recently mentioned veteran of TV who relished playing a wrong man type in this film after

finding purchase mainly in family films. All right. So it's a guy going against type. He was also on TV. He did family films and then he did more of a serious, you know, there's a certain

comedic thing with he's kind of an easy guy to like chuckle at. But this, he wanted to be very serious for this role. I didn't put it in here, but I just should mention it anyway. Peter Yates directed this. I'm going to be,

is it road to perdition? It is not. Yeah, that's too many. I'm kicking. You're going to kick, kick, kick, okay. Tagline, falsely accused, unjustly convicted,

determined to survive on the inside, demanding justice once he's on the outside. Oh, hell yeah That's a good movie I don't know if I've seen this But you just made me want to watch whatever it is It is I've seen it

It's not so bad It's it's a fun little Have a beer and don't really pay attention movie Nothing is coming All right Tagline 2 Two cops on the take

Just made the biggest mistake Of their lives They framed Dot dot dot dot Oh fuck I'm gonna guess the title is the name is my guess

that is correct Stephen uh huh cool and this is still like in the pretty woman yeah this is all 88 8789

okay nothing nothing okay not nothing working with Tom Selick was one of the main reasons director Peter Eates had for directing this action drama

Tom Selick action drama what the fuck is going on I don't fucking know I got you know what I'm just going to say it because it's a movie that I haven't said

in a long time but I've always V.I. Worchowski how about that? No it is it's not that though I would have loved to have seen that on here no this is a movie

called an innocent man oh okay it was yeah I guess Tom Seleck really wanted something uh you did that a quigley down under that's those are the other

that was a couple years after this okay yeah yeah Um, okay, so part two, who, the dating game. Ooh, I love this. I'm going to give out a year and then I'm going to list three movies and you have to tell me the match. Which, which movie came out in the year that you've said. Okay, all right, yeah, I like this.

Okay, we're going to do the 90s. We're going to go 90 to 2000. Okay. 1990. Tremors, Alien 3 remains of the day. can hear the list again Tremors Alien 3

Remains of the Day It's wait 1990 you said Yeah I said 1990 I'm going to do Remains of the Day Uh

No great Andrew Tremors Correct Oh For some reason In my mind

I was like that It was a 92 guy But apparently not The What's it was 92 Remains Remains Alien 3 I believe

It was, yeah, yeah. All right. 1991. All right. The bodyguard? Childs Play 3. The firm. Oh, wow.

That's tough. Jesus. I'm going to guess the bodyguard? Incorrect. It was Childs Play 3 and what was the other one? The firm. Ooh. Eric.

I'll do Childs Play 3. Correct. You got it. Oh, my God. There it is, dude. This is like Russian Roald. lad right here. Well, no, it's like, it's kind of like, after

someone guesses, it's like on who wants to be at a millionaire when two of the things go away. Yes. Yes. Each one of these is three, by the way. Could I use a lifeline or phone a friend? You can phone Han Solo frozen and carbonite behind you.

Okay. 1992. The hunt for Red October. The Doors. El Mariachi. These are all really, good actually in terms of it's hard to figure that out

Andrew Red October Stephen El Mariachi Correct Oh Ooh I would have guessed that was later

Yeah just like maybe one year even Yeah Desperado was 94 I think Oh you know that's probably what I was That made me think El Mariachi was a little earlier than that. Oh, yeah. Okay.

1993. Hocus pocus. Sister act. The Little Rascals. Eric. I'm going to say Little Rascals to keep us going. No. Hocus Pocus. Correct. Yeah.

All right. Congratulations, Steve. Thank you so much. You've won the big game, I think, right? We don't know that yet. Uh, okay. Don't we? 1994.

Under siege, Richie Rich, Tommy Boy. Andrew. Richy rich. Correct. I was going to say under siege. That was what, probably 92, right? Fuck. I would guess that's 95, but I might be wrong.

I guess it's 92. Oh, yeah, he's right. Um, okay. Ninety-five. Empire Records The Pelican Brief Space Jam Wow

Oh Ooh 95 Eric Pelican Brief Nope Andrew Space Jam

Nope Oh Empire Records Yes Yeah I think I knew it was in Space Jam because Space Jam has that awful Pulp Fiction joke in it. So you got it.

It's like 96, 97 or something. Oh, Christ. Yeah, you're right. With like, who is it? Elmer Fudd is. And Yosemite Sam and they like wear the sunglasses. Yeah, that's right. It's needle drop. Yeah. It's real bad. That's a fun. Uh, 1996. Well, liar, liar. Apollo 13, the first wives club. Andrew. First wives club. Correct.

nice nice I would have guessed liar liar because that was like later carry so that was kind of like when the wall was coming down

1997 as good as it gets the faculty rush hour oh wow Andrew good as it gets correct

I would have guess I was like 98 99 I don't know why I had that in my head like just because of the Oscars that happened like that following year or whatever.

I don't know. 1998. Gattaca. Urban legend never been kissed. Fuck. Ooh. I'm just...

Steven. I guess it because I want it to say Gattaca gang. Nope. Eric? Urban legend? Correct. Ooh.

Yeah. If you see one movie this year. Yeah, make it Gattaca, gang. I love that Norm's Larry King loved Gattaca. All right, 99. Ever after, October Sky, what dreams may come? Wow. Andrew?

Ever after? Nope. Oh, I would have guessed. Eric, October Sky? Correct. Oh, nice. And last one of this level. 2000.

Bicentennial Man, Shanghai Noon, analyze this. Andrew? Bicentennial Man? Nope. Oh, man, I thought I was getting my timing working at the multiplex. Eric, correct there. Analyze this? Nope.

Ooh. I don't remember what the third? If you didn't remember it, you can't fucking tell them. I don't say it. I do not remember. I literally do not remember. I don't know if I could draw a clock right now. It was, it was Shanghai noon. Shanghai noon. Oh, Shanghai noon. I would have guessed that was later just because it feels like it's, like, all the rush hours came out and then Shanghai New came out. Yeah, I would have guessed that that was like post-9-11 cinema right there. All right. Wow. So this is the last one, guys. It's been great being your Game King. But I'm very happy to be bringing it back to. the to the master. I mean, come on now. It's Steve's thing. He's been doing this. I have been a shambles doing this shit. So, uh, you know, relinquishing your throne. I am at the end of this. I mean,

I have to. This is, this is this thing. I just, I, but I enjoyed my time doing it. You want to marry a common woman and now you have to give up the throne. I didn't want to bring my personal life into this. But if you want to talk about it, yes, you know, I love her very much. Um, okay. This is and D and that is Dermott and Dylan. No. Oh, you motherfucker. Look at you go. What's going to happen is I'm going to give 10 to each of you and you are, so no competition. Okay. Each one of you is going to get 10 and you have to tell me, I'm going to give you the name of the movie. You have to tell me if it was Dylan or Dermott in it. I love this. Wow. I'm just surprised between the two of them. There's fucking 30 projects. Oh, way more, way, way more. Wow. Okay. I mean, it's both of their filmographies remember so it's quite a lot okay so here let me get this so we're going to start with Andrew love it oh crap all right uh let me make sure I have I'm close enough that

I can make a mark each time um you keeping track of these scores I am of course I am okay so we're going to start up here you ready Andrew as I'll ever be okay Wonderland John Holmes movie. I'm going to go, Dylan McDermott. Correct. All right. Burn after reading.

Oh. McDermott again. The gray. The gray. Oh, is that that Liam Neeson Wolf movie? It is indeed. I just thought it was Liam Neeson and some wolves. And I saw that movie in the theater.

Mulroney. Correct. All right. Insidious 3. That is Dermit Mulroney. Correct. The Cowboy Way. Dylan McDermott.

Correct. The wedding date. Dermit Mulroney. Correct. Living in Oblivion. Dylan McDermott. No. Steel Magnolias.

Dylan McDermott? Correct. Career opportunities. Dermott Moroney. Correct. And last, young guns. Oh, that's got to be Mulroney again. Yep.

Yep. All right. There you go. First one down. How much were those worth each? It's just one. That seat was hot. Yeah, I'm going to blow it.

Okay. Steve, you're next? Sure. I wanted to say Dermil Roni's my favorite part of Burn after reading because he's in that fake movie, that fake rom-com with, will you come down from there? And the whole theater goes erupts. It's like a really, it's such a stupid part of that movie. It's very funny.

I saw it once. I honestly did not care for it at the time. It's one of the lesser coens for me, but it's still, it's pretty fun. Yeah, it gets better. I really, I really like that movie. I just remember the homemade sex chair. Mm-hmm. Oh, yeah, big too.

Okay. All right, Steve, you ready? Mm-hmm. Okay. Uh, Texas Rangers. Dermit? No, fuck. Uh, Twister, 1989.

Dermit? Nope. There's got to be Dermit sometime. Come on, Dermit. Dermit all the hell, dude. Hill, there was you. Dermit. No.

Fuck. It's giving you all Dillins. Oops, all Dillins. The Oops, all Dillins round. Angels in the outfield. Oh, fuck. That's Dillon, isn't it? No, it isn't.

Fucking shit. The thing called love Dylan No Hamburger Hill Wait was that last one correct or not No I've got none right so far Oh okay

You got one You got one I did go one Dermit Uh no Hamburger Hill The fuck The Messengers Dylan?

Correct. Is that that we're informing people of the War Dead movie? It's the one with Ben Foster. What's her name? Kristen Stewart when she was young. It's like a horror. It's like a kind of horror movie. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yep, never mind. Lovely and amazing. It's got to be Dermit. Correct. Good movie. Miracle on 34th Street, the remake. That's Dylan. Yep.

And how to make an American quilt. I'm going to go Dylan again. Nope. The only one I was really confident was Miracle on 34th Street. Everything else is a guess. You still got four. You got four. Because also like I was keeping, I was raciously keeping anything from the American Southwest to Dermit Mulroney.

Like anything in Tejas that's got. to be him but oh sure yeah Worcester something that's got to be fucking Durbin of course um okay Eric you ready for a baby yeah yeah I do I cannot tell these guys apart so this is going to be horror so proceed

Olympus has fallen Dermin no Georgia rule Dylan no I'm just going to do it back and forth until I get one. It's got to hit one of these times.

Kansas City. What the fuck is Kansas City? It's an Altman movie? It's an Altman movie, yeah. Oh, God, okay. Dylan? No. Dylan.

Dillon. Jersey Girl, 92. Dermot? No. Named. Nailed. Hardware Oh fuck

I did I watched this recently Dermit Point of no return Oh Dylan No What sucks is I just watched that movie too

King Richard Dermit No Bad girls Dylan? No. Home for the holidays. Does it matter?

A little bit. Dermott? No. And finally the campaign. Dermott. It's amazing. Out of those 30, you still didn't do copycat. You didn't do my best friend's wedding.

No, I was six. Yeah, like these are all movies that were in my head. I was waiting for him to show up. It's amazing. it. All right. So I'm going to do some calculations here, fellas, real quick. Hell yeah. Oh, yeah, man. So yeah. Pretty Woman,

super fun episode. We had a lot of fun doing it in Boston. Coming up at the two hour, Mark, pretty woman episode will be here. Do not friend. We should say on Patreon, we've got a WLM episode on Casino Royale. Hell yeah. That's right. An animation damnation episode on Invader Zim. Gleepe glossary on Darth Mall Oh, that's right.

We got a nexus where the animated series They're getting trapped in a time loop with Klingons. It's pretty cool. The TNG is a surprisingly effective Lexwana Troy episode With David Ogden Steers in this fucking great performance As this dude who's like a scientist who kind of comes from like a sort of like a running man universe where it's like

once they reach 60 like they just have to kill themselves for like population control and like she loves him and doesn't want him to do it it's it's surprisingly good for a walks on Troy episode so that's coming out at the end of the month as well and then August we have uh anything

no I think that's all well we should say also if you like these live shows you like listen to them if you're in the New York area on December 6. You got to come to see us do total recall at the Bell House 15 year anniversary show guys. It's going to be so much fucking fun. That's right. Saturday which is cool. It's a Saturday night, December 6. Tickets are on sale

now over on the WHM podcast.com. That's going to be a ball man. I can't believe 15 years. Absolutely. Pricewaterhouse Cooper is still collated the end of the end of those. I think we know we can crown the victor. We don't need You know what? Yeah, we'll do this whole part

at a different time because we're in a crunch here. Of course Stephen has won. Of course. Not of course. Chris said, of course. I'm just quoting Chris. You know what? Congratulations.

You've done a great job. You've carried yourself over the finish line. And this is great because now you get to pick a cameo and a Redux episode coming up in September. I will announce the Redux episode. Give it us some thought today. just in case, you know what I mean? You know what I mean? And it is

going to be, speaking of live episodes, a redo of our first true live episode. We had done like a bullshit live episode before history's famous drunks at the creek. Oh, that was a terrible thing. Which is just our girlfriends. I want to, was Sophie even there at that point, Chris? I don't think so. No. If so, it just had happened. Yeah, and a guy from my job came too, all right?

Oh, there you go. Oh, yeah, I remember that. that. That was not that. When we finally decided let's do episode, let's do live episodes in front of people who's the New York City Podfest January the 13th, 2013, when we at the pit underground, not the main stage, by the way,

what we talked about, on deadly ground. Oh, baby. Steer and Searle. I have seen this movie so many times. I have not watched in the last 12 years, so it'll be fun to go back to. Oh, it's awesome. I can't wait to watch that old man being tortured again. Exactly. Good pick.

That's really cinema. Cinema. So look at that coming back in season 16 on deadly ground. On deadly ground. We'll have the actual scores

and everything on the site and everything. Everybody will get what they need. We'll down to it again when we come back. We'll do what I have the cameo, which I will know soon enough. Just keep refreshing. Keep refreshing CNN for those scores. It will be in a manifesto.

It will be ES signed at the bottom. We'll give the official numbers out when the parade is happening. The New York Times is a needle they're working on to figure that out. That's right. Yeah, so that's it, gang. That's the VHS trailer game for this season. Congratulations to Steve.

Congratulations on former Game King Chris Cabin hosting this season. But now, yes, sit back, relax, and enjoy us from last December, I believe it was. Or maybe November. I don't know. Who gives a shit the point is it was last. year we were talking about pretty woman live in Boston from Laugh Boston which is a great club great show great audience enjoy take this pink ribbon off my eyes I'm exposed and it's no Big surprise

Don't you think I know exactly where I stand This world is forcing me to hold your head Because I'm just a girl, a little of me Well, don't let me out of your side Oh, I'm just a girl Already have my teeth Oh, don't let me have any rights Oh, I'm ready to hear.

Mercy. Boston, what's your dream? What's your dream, Boston? What's your dream? What's your dream? This is the town of dreams. Everybody dreams in Boston about a new Sam Adams flavor.

You know, hopefully. This one has Wicked in the title. Oh, that's, oh, boy. That's actually, was, okay, this is a, Real deal question. Any businesses around here getting in on your famous Wicked with the movie coming

out? Oh, that'd be great. John Blowhard's Wicked Good Sandwiches. Wait, so no one's saying shit. So no one in this town, so what happened? The ice cream company that I worked did like Wicked Sundays. Okay.

Ooh. That's pretty sweet. Ice cream, right part of what I'm talking about. Austin, what is happening? Hello. Hello. Oh, man. Oh, ho.

Yo, wicked was wicked bad, bro. It was wicked fucking long. Guys, I don't want to get killed tonight. You know, it's a great way to start a show. Take something incredibly popular. And at the top, go right against it. Well, yeah. Well, I'm not breaking the fucking Red Sox balls up here.

Jesus Christ. Leave them alone. Have you met me? I mean this movie was super popular as well Over 400 million some odd dollars at the worldwide box office Did no one have anything better to do in 1990? No, it was huge... They didn't have the internet yet, it didn't have, you know?

Right, all right, the internet. You got a pretty woman five times. It's a charming movie about a guy getting a prostitute and deciding to keep her. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. I actually thought it was a movie about an innocent alien that comes to Earth and moonlights as a prostitute.

Because they are explaining things like running water to her and fucking what a fork looks like. I'm like, are you Ariel, the Little Mermaid? Closer to my stepmother is an alien than I would like. At one point she holds a bunch of money as if it's a coconut. Will someone take this from you? I'm like, you're a prostitute. You know what money is.

You have to know what money is. Only four months, though, Steve. I don't think you've got a hold of it quite yet. But I know that when Richard Gere, gave you that wad of cash it wasn't in a big fucking ball like a cat's been playing with it this is one of my cash balls

I don't give this to anybody you know this is very special that you get one of my cash balls but at the heart of it right this is a Nora if it worked out right yes yes I saw that movie spoiler alert that's my favorite thing

is and of course this is all over the other someone said it makes pretty woman look like a Disney movie Well, it, yes. Well, Touchstone is a Disney company. Guess who made a lot of money off over this movie? Touchstone is basically Disney, but it gets a little handsy. Oh, you know what I mean?

I was like, I got a Disney movie, but it gets a little handsy in the back there. I wanted to touch my stone after watching it. This is the only... If ever there was like a great time that you didn't use an alternate opening, though, like the Touchstone Pictures logo, classic. Everybody remembers the blue bar, the lightning bolt. this is the perfect movie to not have Mickey come out and be like

she's sucking dick for money that's the only I mean it's the only way that a Disney product could accept the idea that sex workers exist yes this is the only way to do it's this in Ernest movies that's what Touchstone was really known for

gosh Mick what's this movie about oh man I would have loved they should have had a movie where Ernest go see Pretty Woman oh yes well they do Earl Vern so Ernest pays for it is the title of the film? Yeah, yeah.

Beautiful. Ernest had to pay for in a lot of other ways throughout those motion pictures. If you're going to keep talking to that Vern guy, it's going to count as a threesome, so that's going to be more money.

Yeah, like you keep talking to Vern. I don't see Vern. If it's a weird camera thing, that's extra, definitely. The chair's in the corner if Vern shows up. If he wants to be here. It's like her rate is too much

and Ernest responds with eh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. How many of y'all are familiar with the show we run on the internet. Fuck yeah. Hell yeah. Anyone coming here for the first time

dragged here by a friend or loved one? Apologies. First and foremost. This is a comedy show where you take a movie good, bad, or otherwise, and kind of kick it around for a little bit. It gets pretty filthy.

Or it can. It's known to get pretty filthy. This is a movie about prostitution, so strap in. It's going to get bad. Oh, it's going to get bad. I think we can start here. This is an otherwise situation. I mean, it's not a bad movie.

and it was a we hate movies. Oh, they hate everything. No, there's like an otherwise scenario for me. I gotta like it. I had a good enough time. The soundtrack fucking rocks. Hell yes. Bangor soundtrack, not just that Roy Orbison tune.

No, no. It's the Go West tongue. I mean, a king of wishful thinking, you were right to put it right at the top. Because, honestly, this guy, Richard Gere, this movie does not need wishful thinking. He's gotten everything he's ever going to want. He doesn't have to wishfully think about nothing.

So then what is he the king of? He is the king of, buying people he sounds really good at that he kind of is right because he's always buying these companies doing the corporate rating apparently what it was once called now it's just called business

have you ever heard a call I can well get yours to it he is the king of pushing Jason Alexander around because I love it at the end Jason Alexander is the true villain of the film everybody knows it kind of even in the middle you kind of get it oh yeah but up top He just takes this dude's car

and he's like, yeah, I don't know how to drive it and I don't give his shit. And he lets him. Yes. He lets him destroy this lotus. He's doing this great Gatsby nonsense where it's the party for him

but he's staying in the shadows. Oh, aren't you just so emotional and fucking deep? I mean, he's doing stuff. He's breaking up with his girlfriend in New York, it sounds like. So he is doing something. And like, that's what you're,

I guess you're supposed to like, if you've heard the song, King of Wishful Thinking, It's a guy who's, like, trying to talk himself out of being sad. And I'm like, are you really sad in a lotus going to Beverly Hills? To look for direction. Yes. Dude, all this fucking excuse in the book, man.

Officer, I was looking for directions. I didn't know where the most local sparrow was, so I had to ask. No, I was arguing for the rate of directions. How many miles till I hit Pound Town? Officer? Officer. I do love the very beginning of this movie. Oh, yeah.

It's a high society party that Jason Alexander is throwing for his piece of shit friend Richard Gere. And we open on like close up magic. It's literally... Oh, my God. After like the establishing shots of Los Angeles with, by the way, you totally see Phil Spector's house

where he murdered that woman. Hot spot. Love that. And after that, the first thing you see is close up magic. This needs to be interrupted It is not close up magic It is close up

Financial magic Yeah, it's true You got this specialized For your big hoity tooty fucking party It's still a guy just playing with coins And there's not a child Anywhere to be found But you know that guy's making bank

At like the conference center Across the lobby here Doing whatever corporate retreat bullshit's been going on But everyone's a whole great party What is it? Really loved all the close-up magic. Have you seen the magician? Have you talked to him? He's great.

There's going to be a clown later. Excellent. I'm 41 years. If I go to a billionaire's party and there's a magician or a clown, I'm thinking, oh, at the end of the night, we're killing this guy. Yes.

We're killing this guy. We're going to hunt him through Beverly Hills. You know, Muffy, the party was really fantastic, but, you know, they were missing, of course. It was a bounce house. But I did make that magician disappear. Yes. Oh, those three.

gentlemen are dressed like the Ghostbusters. Fantastic. More champagne. Oh, we've got girls dressed up as Disney princesses. Guess who's going to survive through the night? I guess you'll be surprised. But, you know, he doesn't, you know, basically gear gets a bad vibe at the party.

His girlfriend won't show up. So he's like, my limousine or whatever is backed up by all these cars. I'm going to steal your brand new sports car. Again, which I do not know how to drive. And he's acting like he just got to call like, oh, your wife was in a massive car. accident and you better get to the hospital

to say goodbye and really he just doesn't want to wait for the car to get pulled out because Jason Alexander's like why don't you just hold on two seconds and he's like well no I couldn't possibly do that there's that car and then that car and then my car I don't even think I honestly don't even think that like he asked

for the car Darrell is over there reading his fucking paper being like what okay all right fine Darrell the limo driver Darrell the limo driver who is not everyone watched this 45 minutes ago like we Oh, wait, who watched it here? All right, so we are familiar.

Okay, yes. You just saying, saying Daryl, a dude who's in two scenes. Daryl? Maybe someone didn't remember. Is my personal friend. And I had to give him a shout out. But we cut to the other part of the other side of town, and we cut to Julia Roberts' ass. Or I should say, Julia Robertson's ass.

Right. And I feel like. Carol looking fantastic. Yes. And I feel like Garell. Mary Marshall told Sophia Copla how to open and lost it. You got to start with the ass, sweetheart. You get him from the ass, they'll pay attention

for the whole movie. It's the one thing pornography got right. Was ass first, every time. I'd like to argue pornography got a couple things, right? No, no, no, no, no. Pornography decided that we would use VHS over beta. Pornography decided we would use Blu-ray over HD, D, pornography has shaped this world

in more ways than you can But it doesn't do enough so I need directions I need to pull over and find directions and what is this this manual and it's a standard H or something so he picks up a standard H oh okay

a hooker well that's I mean oh good they didn't get it a hooker yes to underline that when we first where Kit

and Viv live this is Julia Roberts and Laura San Gamo it's hotel and it's just the H and the O that's what you call symbolism it's the subtext of the film

it's a visual fucking medium all right Gary Marshall we don't we see Julia Roberts wake up she looks you don't see her put on this wig it must take her

fucking four hours to put 12 pounds of red hair. I don't get it. Fuck that dude doing close up coin tricks. This is the real magic. Yes. What did you? Keeping all that in? Is there a staple gun going in? Oh, dude, yeah. She's like mopping up little blood

spatters from all the staple. I love it. Again, she has a $12,000 hair cut, but let me just wear this Halloween wig outside. Yeah. I mean think, would you put a wig on share? No. That thing's too big. You can't fucking put that thing. cracking. You can't put it down. Are you serious? Maybe some of these

fellows looking for directions are trying to pull it too much. Maybe that's part of the issue. I just think it's like, well, blonde is king at the time. It's got to be a blonde. And still is. Plus, also just for men. Of course. Of course.

But so she goes out, she finds out that her roommate has stolen their money for drugs. She's trying to find a roommate. They find this other woman, there's like a ripper about in this movie that we kind of... There's a whole other way more interesting movie going on. We don't pay a ton of attention too,

which is kind of dehumanizing for a movie that's trying to make sex workers like people, you know what I mean? She's just in the garbage. And like, even Julia Rob was like, no. You're not getting an Al Pacino reaction from heat, which I would... Even that kind of hold back kind of thing,

I would have loved to see, but it doesn't happen. It's another movie that we're... Like, Hank Azaria fucking starring in The Dumper. Oh, not a dumper struck again. Prouling the New York streets, the dumper. They dumped another one last night. And it's just like, Julie Roberts' best friends

getting killed left and right. She's like, where's my other friend? And, man, this living situation with Kit, the best friend? Uh-huh. Oh, my God. This is disgusting. This apartment, it's like Barney Gumbles and the Simpsons. It's just nasty.

Everybody's accidentally sleeping on conch shells Like it's really bad It is gross It's a real, you live like this bitch? Well I mean here's the thing Coke is either going to make you Have the most immaculate apartment possible Or a total fucking mess

And it just just depends So the plot of the film Maxine is going on Here on Hollywood Boulevard And Dick Gear pulls up in this car That he can't switch the gears in Can you fucking believe it? And he, I mean the thing must have floated there by magic

if that's true. Well, it's completely unbelievable. He doesn't stall out once, but he can't drive stick. The first thing someone who can't drive stick does is stall the fucking car. But he was so horny, the car powered itself. Just really jamming that pedal, dude. Eric, he was just thinking about anything other than prostitutes

and just wound up at the Red Light District. It just happened. It's the best of it. All the time, every night. Anyone else? No. You just want to pay respect to the Ritzbrough. and all of a sudden you got a prostitute on your hands. That's an interesting way that they argue over the territory on Hollywood Boulevard is like I work from Charles Chaplin down to Joan Collins

and then you could have after that. I just kind of found that interesting. A little bit of possible like real-life sex worker territorial fighting there. So if you have a favorite person to get directions from, you're like, go to Chaplin. Oh, you're looking for a tall blonde? Okay, yeah, you're going to want to go all the way down. Yeah, I think, yep, I think that is near Jimmy Stewart's.

Yeah, I think that's that one. Oh, no, there's hookers all over my square. Stop stepping on me. Oh, my God. This is the best view of the house. I once found a hooker, like shit blonde hair. Why don't you have blonde hair too? Oh, Claret, you hear that's a car horn.

Every time you hear, no, I'm not going to finish that. Not just, you can finish that yourself. And you can finish it any which one. way you like. I don't want to ruin Christmas on December 4th. But so yeah, so he drives up in this fucking Lotus and obviously we're like, holy shit,

this is a rich guy. Let's try and go get him. Work it, baby. Work it. She takes off her jacket. She's dressed like the Fifth Element girl. Yes, she really is. Yeah, Chris Tucker should be screaming at her down a hallway at some point. It's an insane

outfit. It really looks. I mean, she's dressed like the wrestler Owen heart. Yes. Like, she's wearing, like, a wrestler onesy with, like, a shitty

jacket over her shoulder. And Marlon Brando's hat. Yeah. Dude, this hat that she insists on keeping. Well, it's the only to keep,

there's got to be a hole in it, and the rest of the red hair is popping out. Oh, shit, that's where she's hiding it. Yes. Oh, that makes sense. She comes up to the car

and she's like, so where are we going? Flostin Paradise. Of course. It's super green drive, of course. So he's like, I don't know how to get back

to Beverly Hills. She's like, I can show you for, you know, what's the agreement of money? Ten bucks and then it's up to 20. But it's a hundred an hour it gets to, right? That's when we get the sexy stuff. But right now we're just driving and she

acts like a prostitute of Tatooine would act. She's like, wow, this car can go 60 miles. She's like a little, like Jake Lloyd-esque this performance is at the beginning of like fawning over the little car. Again, I said she's a fucking alien in this movie. So the Star Wars

Metamorphor is perfect. And at the time there was nothing more attractive in the American psyche than a woman who knows about cars. Oh my God, the rarest bird. Yes. Clearly, in a couple

years, we hit the high watermark with that with Marissa Tomei and my cousin Vinny. There's a big reveal. I'll tell you what, man. I fucking hear talk about those tire treads in that movie, something moves a little bit. I mean, Could I get some directions over here? Oh, no, it's going to be way more than 3,000.

I'm going to tell you right there. And I guess we've now evolved to women who know about Deadpool. Is that how that works? Yep. Okay. Correct. All right, that's fair. That's the next stage.

Yeah. Yeah. But so she's, you know, she's like, he's fucking up the car. She's like, oh, my God. And he's like, you know what? Why don't you drive? And I'm like, that's a bad idea. He gets out of the car.

I'm like, you just lost your car, buddy. Bye-bye. Like, you definitely have to do the thing because she's like, oh, I can drive this. I ran around with dudes in my hometown. There were car guys, whatever the excuse is. And she's like, okay, I'll drive. So he's got to pull over.

You've got to be like, okay, you get out the car. I'm going to do one of these over the console to get into the passenger seat because I don't want you stealing my car, you see, because it's not even mine. But even still, she's like, oh, I know the way to Beverly Hills. It's this alley where you're going to get fired. kill.

It's right here where all my friends are waiting for you, rich man. Oh, look at my friend, Matteo. I didn't know he'd be here in the alley. He's got a shift. Oh. It looks like this road ends in a brick wall. No, it's a secret tunnel.

Is that a toothbrush she has? Oh, it has a pointy end. Oh, okay. That's new. But no, she's a wonderful lady. She drives him right to Beverly Hills, you see. Right to this nice hotel here that I think we played during the L.A. Improv Festival.

Oh, wow. The podcast festival, yes, indeed. That's filmed in the same hotel. Finally, that hotel is historic. Finally, that's what did it. Yes, of course. But, you know, at this point he realizes like, I'm a lonely man, she's a prostitute, she's Julia Roberts

as a prostitute. How much is this going to cost me when he come on inside? Kind of a deal. Just broke up with my girlfriend. Got to celebrate a little bit? That's really what it is. That's what it felt like. That is the weirdest part about the Richard Gearness of it all. He's like, I've never been the world's biggest Richard Geer fan.

Richard Geer fans in the audience. Hell yeah. We got to. Fuck yeah. You like that movie? My people. You like that movie Summersby? It's the stone faceness of Richard Gear, which sometimes works in movies and sometimes doesn't.

Here it's like, what is this guy after? You know what I mean? You don't ever trust him. That's why he's like mysterious and sexy. I mean, I'd fuck him. Sure. They're supposed to be a feeling. of inner work, of an inner

world with him, and there's nothing comes out in this movie. I'm just thinking he's the Ripper that killed that other lady. That would be nice. And she's the next victim right here. More of a looking for Mr. Goodbar situation would be good, I think. You're right. Oh, I don't know how to drive this car, help me

with my couch getting into this van. These are very similar gags. I'm lowering the bucket, all right? Little tougher in a lotus than in like a van the way that man does. But yeah, you're correct. Oh, yeah. Was she a a great sexy prostitute.

It's just good looking, right? Oh, yeah. So one of the, I feel like, like, this next moment here sort of made, like, some Disney executives kind of raise an eyebrow or two, you know? She goes, well, you know, it's going to cost you, you know. And he goes, what's the rate? And she goes, $100 an hour.

To which he replies, $100 an hour, a little stiff. Now, here's where, here's what happens. Oh, yeah. She reaches over into the passenger seat and grabs his schwan. there, you know. And she goes, no, but it's got potential. Just grabbing hog in this

Disney movie? My pearls. No, that happens in bed knobs and broomsticks. Oh, right. Angel Lansberry's just going around. So that's the knob? That's the knob and or the broomstick. Dibbidi-dobbitty-dong, dude. That's, you know.

Polished knobs. So we ruin that childhood movie for you all. Fun ties. The guy outside, is the fellow that Chris and Polly Walnuts kill at the end of Season 1 of Sopranos. He's there. We also have a Seinfeld alum in the hotel

as well. The guy who's obsessed with Desperado Oh, right, yes. The song. He is among the workers there. But the head honcho, of course. Gary Marshall's true love in this world. Hector Alizando. Yes. Yes. You want to talk about bad wigs.

Oh, man. I love him, though. I fucking love this guy. Oh, he's the best. He's the best. Oh, my God. Apparently Disney, like, this movie had like an unlimited budget. But for some reason, they were like, we're not paying for Hector Alizondo. And Gary Marshall's like, no Hector, no movie.

I'll pay for Hector. It's just an amazing thing where he paid for his salary until Disney finally relented. But I just love the idea of Gary Marshall, like just big ball in Disney. Like, that's how you get to $100 million. You see that face over there? Do you like overboard?

There's no, it wasn't Kurt Russell that they were reacting to. It was Hector Elizando. Listen, you got Julia, she's the peanut buddy, understand. Then you got Richard. He's the jelly. You need the bread. That's Hector Alizondo. Now I'm picturing all three of them fucking, and I love it.

I love it. Came close. Came close, sir. And then you take that big delicious sandwich, and you put it in your brown paper, Gary, Lunch Sack, baby. Oh, yeah. Let's get to the cafeteria.

And I guess, well, you know, to be fair, Jason is like the pickle. He shouldn't be there, really, but he's there. You bite into a delicious peanut butter and jelly sandwich and go, oh, there's a pickle in his. That's disgusting. What is this Elvis shit? But, yeah, so first we go up to his apartment,

his nice, beautiful penthouse. She's a little nervous. about her outfit here, but she also is like fucking with old people, too, which we love to do. Right? She's freaking out the squares. She messes with the squares twice in this movie and it's awesome. Yes. It freaks them all out because, oh my God,

a sexy woman. Yes. Well, the wife is like, put your tongue back in your mouth of Howard. And they won't even ride the elevator with them because they think you know, they're news about the STDs. Yeah, it's a close quarters, you know, we don't want to catch nothing.

We're going to catch it. stay off but they get upstairs and you know she again like she's like wow a fucking couch like she has no idea like anything

your bathroom has a door it's also called the sofa what is this what is this magical lifting device it's an elevator Tyson Krupp actually

made it but he's like doing some weird thing where it's like I'm not going to drink but I'm also going to look at financial reports as you mope around my house. I'm like, what the fuck am I paying for? And how is a guy

like this in the industry he's in a fucking teetotaler? Are you kidding me? It's crazy. And then she starts watching TV that made me feel like watching Short Circuit with Johnny Five just trying to figure out how the world works. And you watch I Love Lucy because you're like, well I do

you know what? I'm in Italy. I want to make some wine so I just crush grapes. Is that what you want me to do with your nuts? Yes, that's why I put it on. Do that. Well, she's cackling, which apparently the IMDB trivia is to be believed. I'll get ready for some perfect stuff.

It's not to be believed, but hear this shit. Gary Marshall was off-screen tickling her feet to get illicit this reaction. That's the price of being in my movie, Toots. Yeah, no. Father back, father back. All right, now you feel her out of the frame. Let's get tickling.

Oh, these are some fantastic. Tutsies, Julia. These are beautiful. You know, I can just let... No, you can't. Not the right way. But it still sounds like she's doing laugh acting, though. Like the Julia Roberts laughed. The famous one. And there's not... Gary Marshall didn't do her entire career. Jules, uh, this new movie The Pelican Brief. You're gonna be doing any laughing in it or what? Because if you are, the tickler's free to help out, baby!

Oh, so you're driving the car and stepmom. I could be under there. I could be under it. Pacula? He doesn't know how to twinkle toes. He doesn't know how to tickle them toes. But I do. Gary Marshall, number one tickler. I bet he's good at it, though. I'm sure he's good. I think so.

And Jay Pecula, yeah, he tickled the toe or two in his day. Absolutely. Can you get a doctorate in that? Maybe he's got one. Doctor Toad, dude. He's watching her watch the show, the Lucy show. And like, she's, you know, enamored. and he just sort of like,

is kind of getting turned on by it? Because she's acting like a child. Yes, she is. So here is like, no, it's more like he's proud of himself, but look, look at this awesome night I'm giving her. She was going to sleep outside of a Chinese restaurant. But now look at me.

The awesome guy is fixing everything. Oh, she's kicking her feet and eating junk food and cackling like a little child. I mean, a woman. A woman is what it was. How is it cold at here? That's called air conditioning, my sweet. You can change the temperature in a room?

Wait a second. You tell me this room has four walls? I thought there was only three. What do you mean you can walk outside of the door? It's air. You're just going to fall down. That's a balcony. A lot of places have them now.

And for some reason we use this balcony as growth for Richard Geer's character. Because he's afraid to go outside on a balcony. And she's not. and by the end of the movie, he goes out there once, and it's like, wow. It's really his movie, because he changes. He does.

He's more, he is, that is the thing that is scaring him. It is not the fact that a month ago, his father died, which just seems to be a thing like, oh yeah, that happened. But you don't find that out to like an hour and ten minutes into this two-hour movie, and I was like, that's some information we should have been presented with him.

But why don't you start with the fucking funeral instead of up-close magic? Well, I missed the funeral because I was looking for directions again. I didn't know where it was. For several weeks, I was looking for directions. There's this moment before they get down to it. They get down to, he's basically like, hey, turn to classic movies.

But she, earlier on, like, is about to floss her teeth, and he thinks she's doing drugs in the bathroom. I'm like, come on. You've got to let it happen, dude. Listen, don't mess with the performance. If that's what she needs, go right ahead. But it turns out to be dental floss because of the strawberries in champagne. The seeds got in our teeth.

There was a darker version of this script. And this is not a, I guess, maybe unless an IMDB terrorist put this in the trivia. You never know. But she was supposed to be on Coke, and then part of the condition was her not using, so she's going through withdrawal, and he's like grabbing at her, you know?

That's interesting. I mean, it's like, that would make him more of a weird, I mean, because it is all about control and owning this woman. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. I mean, it is like exactly what a, Disney movie about sex work would be

about. You don't really talk about the thing that much. And also you're not talking about, you're talking about a little bit what he's doing, but he's a monster. Like, a guy who does corporate rating is a monster, and like, he's just a soft guy, you know? Just like, a little hurt from his father, because he

also did it to his father. He corporate rated his dad. That's pretty funny. That's amazing. I love, so they have sex, it's a big, you know, blackout, like, you know, they're like, what do you do? She says everything. I'm like, oh, that's steamy. This is where he gets the most bored blowjob of all time, though. Because she's like, oh, all this Lucy watching is turning me on.

And then, like, she goes to do the deep... There's a whole, like, pillow tossed at his feet, so you know what's going on. And he's, like, half asleep. The pillow is... What is happening? Crazy. I'm sure, like, after Lucy ends, like, the Three Stooges come on. It's a little...

We're getting nutty with it. Suck, suck, suck. What, Curly would have been more infield. with a pretty lady going downtown. That's all I'm saying. Would that be great to be climaxing while someone goes like, wow, ww, wow, wow.

He chowderhead indeed. He takes a shower. I love, wait, hang on. I've never seen this happen before. The rate at which people got that filth that I just said was like a cascading wave. So you just heard this like, oh.

We usually get that from this one over here. Yeah, no, that felt very weird. Do anything? Excellent. I liked it. So we were going to call it first of all, we were going to call it

3,000, and then Disney bolt at my idea to call it the cumster. So he didn't like that one, so we went with pretty, it's a popular song, people love it,

pretty woman. Don't it make you think of prostitution? Yeah, the original title was apparently $3,000, which is a terrible title. Just $3,000? Just $300?

Yeah. Just 300. I made even less sense. Oh my God, it's finally the last of the trilogy of the 2001 series. In 2001, 2010, and the year we make contact.

And in the year, 3,000. Big jump. It's about a guy looking for directions. It's space. Well, you can drive my space stick shift lotus, huh? I don't think she knows where to go, Dave. Downtown,

she's supposed to go downtown. Apparently the original ending, too, was very vicious. and evil, right? So apparently Richard Gear just takes her back to Hollywood Boulevard, throws $3,000 in the street and says, get lost. Makes more sense.

And she doesn't want to take the money, but then the bums start to come, so she takes all the money? This is what IMDB said. I don't know if it's true. Like, let's what they come out of, like, the alleyways? Great chuds are emerging. It's like the monsters from Pitch Black. You don't see them

at first. That doesn't sound like something that you can play a Orbison, do, do, do, do. Shuck it money on the floor. But that's, I love the gall, right? It's like, we're going to have a meeting with touchstone pictures, and you're going to pitch this script, and you left that in to start?

Balls, just balls. Amazing. Amazing. Just, this Lorraine Sanjay, Gamow, and Julia Roberts is, like, trying to desperately grab things. And you're the king of wish for thinking. Just crying, picking wet money up off the street. It wasn't always Richard Gear.

Like, apparently even Bert Rett. Reynolds or someone to auditioned. That would have worked with him, right? He would have been absolutely. Yes, but also you've got to call a pretty lady. There's a pretty lady over here. And you have to, it can't be Julie Roberts at that. You got to get like Anne Margaret.

Yes. Right. Wait, wait, you're saying she knows how to drive the car and I don't know I'm walking. No, I'm not doing the picture. Oh, you do a sex work, huh? Not a lot of working that, is there? Apparently even Christopher Lambert was supposed to be in this at some point. That would have been something.

It was Christopher Lambert and Molly Ringwald. Oh, yes. Just. To blow out one of your 16 candles, I'll give you $3,000 for the week. Eh, he. Yeah. You do look actually quite pretty in pink. Would you prefer the pretty instinct?

Come on, everybody. I'm not going to tell you where the breakfast club is. Figure it out Oh no, she's having a baby Oh wait, she wasn't in there How much for the whole night Intool Breakfast Club But Richard Deer, who is in this movie

Yes Finds the wing and it's like, what? Dude, you fucking idiot It's like I'm seeing her for the first time Oh my God It's like that guy that was doing close-up magic At that shitty party Oh man

And there's that shot of her sleeping in bed with her real hair, and we linger on it. I'm like, oh, dear God, don't take the knife for... Because I thought it was the dumper for a minute. We never find the dumper! No, the dumper is at large when this movie ends. So the next morning, he realizes that he's got this business meeting later that night that he should probably bring a date to it.

And he's like, you know what? How much for the whole week is the idea? We kind of go back and forth, and it went about three grand. It's about 7,500 bucks. Not bad for a week. I'd spend a week with Richard Gere for that month. Not bad. At the time.

It's like double that, right? Mostly pretty boring and then some what I can only presume to be pretty boring sex on top of that. Well, you're Richard Gere in the 80s, man. You walk out the door, someone's sucking your dick. It's just, that's just the life he lived. That's why he looks bored all the time. He's just had it off. Oh, God.

Oh, Jesus. Just, you know, push a button at least. The second you get unexcited. about Oral, just fucking time for the urn, man. I don't know what to tell you. What a fabulous gift we're given, and you're fucking taking a nap through it, unbelievable. When you hit the four digits, like Richard

has, I don't know. He gives her a bunch of money, he's like, listen, go shopping because we're going to go out tonight, and I need you to wear something that doesn't look like it is from space. And I would appreciate that. So she goes out on rodeo drive. Oh, man. And I mean, like, this is, again,

1990 Julia Roberts. her red hair is flowing. She looks great, even in this kind of, you know, weirdo outfit. She goes into Rodeo Drive, and, like, these snotty women are like, good. It's not like she's coming in dirty, like, can you use your bathroom? Is there

a bathroom somewhere? They look at this woman, like she walked into the foyer of this boutique and pissed on the rug. She's gorgeous, and they're like, wait, what? No. She's in Ford on fucking blondes. It's fine. Like, they would just be like, oh, that's another actress or another musician,

Whatever. But they're like, can I help you, ma'am? You are obviously in the wrong place. Please, Lee. Are those mints for everybody? Can I have some? Ma'am, we're closing early because I've got to go hunting magician

at a party later, okay? I just want to take a nap in your dressing room. Just give me 20 minutes. What's it? Do you? No one else is in the store. Look at this. Look, I got a ball of money.

Okay. Most of the money. this is good. There's a couple ones. I mean, don't you guys have a bed around here I could use? But she, like, she storms out crying, and she comes in and, like, Hector Alizondo acts as if in this hotel

there's never been a prostitute. No. Yeah, fucking right. Dude, his clearly a wig almost flies right off his head. And he stops her and, like, basically, like, you know, brings her to his office because she doesn't know, you know, Richard Gere's last name, but they figure it out, and he's like, so you are his niece?

And I'm like, this is a fantasy you're created. Totally, the old piece scenario. Because he had a niece that was a piece. Just say, oh, so you're his friend. Like, that's something that everyone could get in. He's the one that brings the family into it. Second cousin, it's right there.

It's stepdaughter or stepnees. There's so many places to get stuck in this hotel. They are. No, it's before we invented that stuff, right? That's new technology. Nobody got stuck before. To Andrew's point, pornography is always on the forefront of advancement. Yeah, it's true.

But they come to like a sort of a tacit agreement of like, listen, you know, he's clearly a very important client. Your uncle is a very important client. So we want to keep him happy, so I'll keep you happy, but you'll never come in my hotel ever again after this, right? Unless you give me $50. $50 and we're good. She, again, heads him a ball of money. They wouldn't take it. It's a giant crumpled ball of money.

Richard Gere gave it to her. It wasn't crumpled then. What the hell happened? It was a stack. He gave her a stack. It morphed into the ball. It's like full of gummy bears and shit. Look, it was wrong.

It was wrong for that boutique to throw you out, judge a book by its cover. However, most of this currency smells like Southern Comfort. I'm just going to let you know that right now. Are you going to juggle this thing? What exactly was the point of this? I was just getting used it as a pillow for a second. It is seriously, like, so, okay, it's like this big.

It's crazy. Where is she putting? Yes. Great question. In a bowling ball bag? No, I think she's doing what that magician who did who held the fishbowl between his legs and prestige. I think that was it.

I think she just got that thing right there. That guy should have been at Jason Alexander's party. Oh, man. So she's like, he picks up. the phone and she's like, oh great, you're calling the cops and he's like, Bernice, I need women's clothing please, like her heart warms and Gary Marshall

is someone like, that's why you get Hector Elizondo. Strung at that shit. Nobody else would have been believable. Everybody would have thought he was actually calling the cops, but he's calling a boutique, baby! I am currently writing the sex comedy, Exit to Eden.

The first thing I wrote, Hector Elizondo's part in Exit to Eden. Did he write that movie? movie? He directed it. Every Gary Marshall's script begins with Hector Elizondo enters. Is, dot, dot, dot. I love it, dude. I love actor.

You get the Dan Aykroyd butt cheek in that movie? You definitely get Rosie butt cheek. You get a lot that you don't want in that movie. And like, it's the thing is you've got dated Delaney in that movie and Dan Aykroyd and Rosie O'Donnell are standing in front of her like, get the fuck out of the way.

Get out of the way. Get a lot of Dana Delaney on Tulsa King, Steve. Just FYI. We cannot turn a live show into a Tulsa King show. I won't allow it. Eric, no. I will not allow it. Eric, no.

The end of season two was pretty something. Eric, you stop. All right, tune into the Gleap Glossary for more. Or perhaps animation damnation. We should say there is a Stallone reference because apparently, one, Stalin was up, considered for this role. So that's part of that.

Yeah, you think she'll do some glass tables, yeah. Hey, Gary, is that in the screen? Do you want it to be realistic or not? Because that's what I tell them. When the sex workers come to my house, I show them my glass table first off. Hey, she's working on Hollywood Boulevard.

Why else would you hire someone? I'm not looking for directions. But when Richard Gere is looking for directions, he talks to a homeless guy who's 80-Red by Gary Marge. He's like, yeah, this is Sylvester Stallone's house. Oh, right. Yes, that's fun. When he's looking for directions, that guy wasn't selling.

I could be the king of wishful thinking. Hey, put me in your car. Yeah, exactly. No, yeah, I do this all the time, the 80-R thing. It's just like Hitchcock. I love it. Now I just want to see a homeless Gary Marshall watching. I love Lucy.

be like, this is incredible. Maybe Julia Roberts can touch his fucking feet. How about that? Yes. Oh, yes. A little swap action. Yeah. Fuck yeah. Oh, no. I have a... No, no, no, ma'am.

I have a regular tickler appointment. Every week, she's a professional. Do not try to... These things, live ammunition. So Julie Roberts goes to the nice boutique on Rodeo Drive where they're like, oh, it's just a person. And they're like, cool. And she's like, I need a...

Dreece... A drus? What is it? Drowdraise. It's like a sack, but it looks pretty. They're saying, they're saying I'm going to dinner. I don't know what dinner.

It's like a very long sehert. Very long sehert. The things that, you know, the tea seherts, you know, those things. I'm going to dinner. Where's dinner? Where is it? Is it in Los Angeles?

What's dinner? Is it in Nevada? I could drive if I needed to. This lady knows what's up though because she's like, oh hey Bridget, just FYI. He's not really my uncle. To which this lady coolly responds, honey, they never are.

Fuck yeah. Fuck yeah, Bridget. You know what's going on in this town. Absolutely. To be fair, sometimes there are uncles. That's true. That's true. But I feel like very few... Just in general. There are other ones. But I feel like very few uncles are like

you can spend as much as you want to buy the sexiest shit man for a cocktail dress. Yeah, I do I would love if like an actual uncle and his niece came into this place and she's like, oh yeah, your niece, sure. No, there is my sister kids. Oh, oh, what are I? Hey, we call

them anything you want to. You know, you can fuck your niece if you need to. Excuse me? Pardon me? Oh, my God. Do you want money? Then you're not getting it. But so, yeah, some uncles do do that stuff. Anyway, let's move on.

Damn it. Good pointer. So close. So she gets the nice dress. Richard Gere is very impressed with her. We're off to dinner because it's this client, the dude from one of the brothers from trading...

No, pause. Sorry. We can't skip. Because it's another she's an alien. Oh, please. She's very nervous about dinner, including all the fucking silverware. So there's this really quick pygmalion Hector Alizando scene where he's like, this

is a fork. and this well that's another fork you see okay I guess I gotta start from the beginning this is a room we go through doors to get into the room fork do you mean fuck

no Sheila cancel my 430 this cutlery lesson's gonna take a while oh spoon that's what some of the guys do when they cry you know what you know what we're just gonna move on

to bowls Oh, bowls right between their legs. Bowls. They have two bowls. Oh, sometimes I smoke crack out of that. Crack, just like the thing that dropped credit cards down on me. You know what, I'm going to have to quit. This is a bit too much for me. You know what? Maybe we shouldn't be friends.

They go to dinner and it's this dude, what's his name, Ray Bellamy? Ralph Bellamy. Hollywood Legend. Hollywood Legend, also trading place, is one of the old dudes that ruins Zadak. His life is there, and he's got his grandson. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, yeah. Grand.

Like the knees. Yeah, sure, pal. Grandson, all right. We know this game. Exactly. We know this game. You're a little boy toy here. Richard Cuehers, this is my niece, and, oh, well, this is my grandson.

I'd like to know that since we're doing business together, we are on the same page. I don't even have a son. Sometimes it just skips a generation. Hollywood Boulevard, right? Hollywood Bullabon. Yeah, I picked him up. He was dressed as Batman. He's taken a picture with an elderly couple.

Sometimes the real bargains are the ones that are secretly dressed up like Elmo, you see. The other guy's looking at her like, you're doing a good job with that fork. It took me so long to figure that out. Oh my God, you got forks so fast. I'm still on spoon. She's the one.

Start spooning a sound. outlet. I'm like, no, that's wrong. I'm sorry. But earlier in the movie, actually, there's a sweet breakfast scene where they're talking about the money and stuff, she eats a pancake like a cheeseburger. What are we doing? She has never seen a pancake before.

And knowing this, and knowing this is my big important business meeting, I am not ordering S. Cargo and explaining it. We're just fucking forgoing it and we'll get some fucking calabari for the table. Dude, she couldn't figure out fucking forks. Man, you're asking her to navigate. Tongues? I don't think so.

That's at least a day. Tongs takes a day to teach. Oh, I never tongue on the lips. That's one of the things. I know. You definitely don't want to do that. That's how you fall in love. That's right. But meanwhile, this old man is just giving Richard Gere's shit

this whole time. You're like, your dad was a piece of shit too. And I'm like, what it's awkward dinner to be at. That's awesome because he basically says what Steve just says. And then Gere follows up with, yeah, he died two months ago or whatever. And he's, oh, well, I didn't hear that. No apology for the slander against the recently deceased just a, I didn't hear that. I'm sure you're the reason he's dead.

That just, that feels right. And basically he's trying to buy this guy's shipping company. I think we're making boats. It's like the duty for the Navy. There's a Navy contract that comes up. They're being contracted to build all these ships. And then like what Jason Alexander is just like, just call up the senators and say, nope.

That's how the rich operate this country. true. Jason Alexander is about to shit a watermelon when he hears that he, this guy has business. Like the fact that he can't destroy this man kills him. He's pissed off from here on out. He's furious. And dinner

kind of comes to nothing. They have a nice little, but basically he gets really, like, negged to death by this old man. It doesn't go very well. He goes back to the hotel very solid. He's like, I'm just, you know, you watch TV or whatever, I'm going to go downstairs. God. God.

clock of the morning. And she's watching the movie Sharray. It finishes. She's like, this is pretty late. Hey, if I'm a sex worker and the dude is gone, I'm like, fucking free night. Nice. You just kick your feet up. Order a pizza. I'm going through his

stuff. Oh, definitely going. Definitely going through the stuff. But yeah, ordering a pizza kicking up. The no drug rule is off the table. If you're not here, dude. Now I can find the pills. Now I have smoking crack in the bedroom. Yeah, now we're doing a balancing act in the balcony.

Oh, right. She does do one of those like, are you going to catch me? Yeah. That's a different thing. She almost lethal weapons herself. She almost. She's this close. Fucking Jenny from Forrest Gumping herself, definitely.

But so she's like, where is this guy? I love him so much for some reason. So she like goes downstairs, she finds him. And like, this is like the level of rich he's at. Like, he's at the piano in the ballroom, which serves drinks and stuff or whatever.

And all these waiters are just waiting to go home. They're like, is this guy fucking done with the piano yet? It's three in the fucking morning and they're just waiting for him to leave. I just want, like, because of course he's an aficionado at this piano. He can play, man.

And I was waiting for it to just be like, bing, brach, brang. No, we just let him do this. He likes it, I don't know. She comes in and she's like, oh, you know you had a bad day and he's like, yeah, I didn't. She's like, could you all leave us here? And I'm like, no, this is

this is not your bedroom, dude. Hey, asshole, you got a fucking penthouse in this place. Why don't you get out of where we got to fucking work? I got to be back here 6 o'clock tomorrow morning set up for some bullshit business conference in this ballroom. You just talk to Bernie, okay? He's clearly fine with me fucking everywhere, including the buffet.

On the piano? They fuck on the piano, right? What? They get all their goo all over this piano. It's out. It's going to be out of tune in the morning. You are getting a call at 6 a.m. from Hector Elizondo. They're like, can we talk about the piano, please?

You're one of our most cherished customers, but you owe us a piano, basically. Last night, you bought a piano. Congratulations. I still have my scarf and my coat on. You were my first call. You understand if you don't wipe that off pretty quickly, it'll stain the finish. Do you know how much money is going to cost me to buff out butt cheeks on this piano? It's ridiculous.

Because they leave impressions, you understand. If you're dead for that long... The ass coasters are right there. I don't know why you're not using it. It's a fancy hotel they have a ask coast. Well, because they know what's going on. Absolutely they do. You can buy those.

What we needed, though, like, heaven forbid me get a moment of, like, you know, some dirty comedy in this movie. What happens is, like, he's about to go downtown right on top of this piano here. And the camera kind of, like, pulls back,

and you see the ballroom and it's magnificence and whatnot. You need, like, one dude who's stuck behind, who's just like, eh, that's... Yes, but that is the Burt Reynolds movie. That is not this one.

And that guy, you can watch. Played by Dom De Louise. Watch and learn, kid. Wait a minute, wait a minute. We're making love here on this piano. Do you hear that noise? Yeah. Yeah, that's my buddy.

I told him you could watch. Yeah, he's got a weird laugh. I've never used the words making love. No, no, no. It's fucking or sex. That's it. But in the morning, he's like, you know, you should have bought one other one dress.

She's like, but they were mean to me. So he's like, oh, you know what? I'm going to get Larry Miller involved for some. Hell yeah. Hell yeah. Love Larry Miller. When you need a job done right and comedically, Larry Miller is your guy.

When you need someone to kiss and lick your feet, as if they were a dog, you call Larry Miller. And in he comes to give, it's all. about how obscene is the money. Yes. I'm going to spend an obscene amount of money on my niece's

cocktail dress and attire. And then, of course, this is the pretty woman, like montage, right? Yes. She's going through all the stuff. It's fun, you know. It's fun enough, yeah? I mean, it ends with a great. Who ordered a pizza? Yes, yes. I do, actually,

there's a great moment when, I think it's the night before Hector Elizondo goes up to Richard Geard, he's like, so your niece is quite intriguing young woman. He's like, these the fuck are you talking about. Buddy, all that's up there is me and a hoo-ah. And he's like, well, sir,

due to the illegality of what you're doing, I'm trying to keep you out of jail, you know? Legal? Laws? I am a corporate raider. I don't know what those are. What are those? She kind of does at the end here

a little bit of a goodwill hunting, you know, because she goes... Yeah, rightfully so. God damn. This is the most triumphant part of the movie. She's like, you work on commission? I got a number. How about them apples? I do love, like, telling someone to eat shit after the fact. It's one of the best things in the world. I rewatch that movie the other day.

That line still kind of doesn't make sense. Like, it does. Like, do you like, if anyone starts coming at me saying, do you like apples? I'm like, what? It's 4 o'clock in the morning. Steve, this is a local expression. We don't want to insult the good people. You guys like them apples, right?

Dude, when you say around here, when you say you like them apples, That's like you up. I got it. You know what I mean? That's how it works around it. You should pick my apples, buddy. Actually, a little story here, a couple of years. We played Cambridge Mass like, God, 10 years ago at least.

I think literally 10 years ago. Do you remember the bartender we got in Cambridge Mass who was like weirdly bitter about Ben Affleck success? Yes. Like, this was a dude. Oh, my God. I love this guy. It was closing time.

He's cleaning glasses. He's that fucking Ben Affleck. like he used to come into here a lot. He used to come in here a lot. He said, our penny ala vodka was the best. The best in the nation. Guess not? Guess not, Ben.

Then he goes to make Armageddon. We don't hear from him anymore. Because he was just, it was like, right before he's going to be a bad man, he's going to be a fucking terrible bad man. I'm like, I don't know, man. You are holding on to this. You're holding on to a lot right now. But that dude knew where the bread was buttered, though, because while he's talking all this shit,

there was just Ben Affleck memorabilia. as far as the I can see. It was at the Ben Affleck Memorial Bar. There's a frame grab of him and his final scene in Mallrats. Vinny, he's not dead. He's dead to me. Man, I haven't thought about that.

That guy was salty as fuck. Shit. I just got done talking about the fucking Green Lantern movie for 90 minutes. I'm like, dude, I can't take this right now. We're just looking for a fucking room temperature beer so we can go

to bed. That's it. But so, you know, he... Big mistake. Huge. That's what she throws at this lady, which is awesome. It's pretty great. The lady's like, her monocle falls out. You know what we're having fun. Yeah, that's right. As it would. So she's shocked.

What's happening now? This is where he comes back to the penthouse suite, you see, and she's there with nothing but like a tile and like spread eagle at the kitchen table. It does like a little like honey on home thing and then they have sex and you don't see it. I do wish that any

time you had something like this where you see like because it's very clear she's naked and has her feet up, you just like for just a second just like, huh. Whenever there's a sexy scene, just a little just to remind you. Is it secretly watching the movie behind the scenes? Of course he is. Are you going to me?

First thing I thought that was Gary Marshall. That might be how he goes. That might be how he finishes. That might be the noise. When I come, I sound like Mickey Mouse baby. Julia, do you need to laugh in this scene or no? Because I can make you laugh. The director doesn't know.

Oh my God, I'm so close. You know what? You got to laugh at every scene now, okay? All right. This is the big bath scene. We're up close and personal. You are getting Richard Fier's pruny feet. Yes. Oh, baby. I don't think we needed a close up on that, baby. I wish I had final cut in this movie. I was tickling them, too.

I was going to say, clearly you are not an aficionado. Gear fucking feet, that is a once in a million times. You got to look at those things. They look succulent. They're right out there, perched beautifully. They're waterlogged and pruning and covered in fucking bubble bath.

That's what you want. The dry stuff isn't for the real people. Oh, pardon me. I miss this shot, so note to self. When you listen to this later, go back and check it out. I mean, why do you think Tarantino was talking about this so much when it came out? Oh, sure.

Well, there's a weird part. So he's, like, talking about, like, his dad, all of his problems. And he's like, yeah, I hate my dad. Oh, wow. That's, like, $10,000 worth of therapy. Ha, ha, ha. And then she's like, I have 80 inches of leg behind you. That's 80 inches of therapy.

And I'm like, what the fuck? She somehow converts, like, leg length into currency, and I kind of blacked out. I don't know. I thought she was measuring cocks or something. An 80-inch cock. No, no, all of them lined up. Oh, real cock line up. Like around the world.

Okay. Yeah. Do you recognize anyone in this photograph kind of a deal? Like that famous thing in the 80s, Cox Across America. When everyone touched penises across this great country. Penises across the planet. Oh, got to go through the ocean?

Oh, yeah, baby. It's a lot of dick. There's some countries that aren't participating in Cox across the world. The world. This is how we get to the big polo match. Sure. Man, you know what is unexciting to watch on film? Polo.

I'm glad we're not really doing it. I can presume it's boring to watch in person. Also polo. But I would be watching, waiting for that tragedy. Like the club goes wrong. It smacks someone or a horse. It's not NASCAR. Nobody's going to fucking bite it at this place.

You never know. A hammer right to the head. but you know she's you can spoot the horses you could somewhere here basically like these mean ladies are just like well oh you're the flavor of the month right and she throws it right back in their face

she's like yeah I'm just using them for sex and they're disgusted but they know it's probably they know it's probably fucking great okay it's rich of gear at this point you know she runs into David who is the grandson.

Oh, we forgot to mention, this guy also played Reed Richards in the Roger Corman Fantastic Four movie. That is a surefire way to Yeah, if you've ever drunkenly watched that on YouTube, it's that guy. This guy knows what I'm talking about. Yeah, that's great. Okay, let's keep going.

And he, so Richard Gere spies that. Meanwhile, Jason Alexander's like, who's this charming woman you have with you? is she an industrial spy, to which case he's like, yeah, she's a prostitute and I picked up on the street.

I'm like, no. God damn. Like, he's supposed to be a savvy businessman and he can't think on his feet with this? He starts with like, oh, well, she's in sales. And, oh, well, what does she sell? Uh, pussy. Like, just say anything else.

I just got so nervous, I just yelled pussy on the polo crowd. She's a cocktail waitress that I met last night. She's a cocktail waitress, if you know what I mean. A waitress of any kind. Or, like, just works at one of the boutiques. than just something other than saying she's a hooker. You can say cock boutique

you know, you know, it doesn't have to be a cocktail waitress. You can put cock anywhere. And then immediately, Jason Alexander just goes up to her with dollar signs in his eyes. It's a weird like, I want to be where Richard Gear was. I don't think it's so much about...

You think he's following him around? Like getting all the last, you know, maybe he's... What if Jason Alexander's the dumper? Oh, fuck. That would make more sense, actually. gets violent. The dumper gets violent. He's just like, you know, maybe when this is all over, you and I can meet up.

No, no, thank you. That's fine. Doing that, he's got his little claw on her shoulder. Well, he hilariously does a thing that gets George Costanz in some hot soup a few years later. He does a little this. I'm touching the fabric. I'm touching the fabric. Gross. It's gross.

And poor Amy Yaz back, his fucking wife is just saying, like, okay, this is nice, I guess. Yeah, totally. poor this character married to a fucking 1989 Amy Yazbeck, Jesus Christ, so sorry. You do it just fine. Not a lot of Wings fans here, I guess.

The Mask fans? She winds up being really furious at him at this point because he has effectively humiliated her in public. You know what I mean? Why did you bring me to the polo ground? Because you should tell everyone I would process. Well, I just told the worst person you were a prostitutes.

Yeah, like the dude who's like the chatty Kathy of the office. You told the absolute wrong person for this. Oh, everybody's going to know by the end of this. That's going to be the main takeaway from the polo match, is that we found out that he has an escort. Yeah, it's great. She's

furious, she wants to leave. Much like the end of the original part of the movie, he throws the money on the bed, and I'm taking it no matter what, right? Another... There's more where that came from, dude. Another big ball for

your bag. What is that? Like, laying like that, and he just puts it in a ball. He's like, you remember? Oh. Money. Now that there's gummy bears and ants and shit on it, I recognize that that is money. You see, you have to spit on it to get its form here.

You spit in the money. Get some of that mini bar shit on there. Oh, yeah. And, like, she's, like, furious. She walks out. She's, like, no one's ever made me feel as low as you have. And, like, storms out, power move. Doesn't take the money, which I totally would take every time.

I think he's low-balling her, though. You get an eagle-eye view of this money pile. That's not three grand. Well, it's a pro-rated thing. It's only been three days. Oh, sure, yeah. So low-ball money-wise, not like a sex thing? No.

No, it's just like I said I'd give you $3,000 and here's like $900. I know the word ball was in it. And I know your brain just triggers right there. Sometimes maybe one's lower. Ball testicle. Yeah. But I love his way out of this trouble that he gets himself in. He's like, listen, not only did I humiliate,

the reason I humiliated you in front of everyone was I'm insanely jealous I love you right back that just wins the day I saw you talking to that grandson and I didn't like it yes I didn't like it

the way he says it the second time it's scary it's scary yeah that's like dad's telling you to turn the light off and go to bed it's very scary it was we weren't hitting on each other we were just talking about our own prostitution rackets we were talking to Yeah. Like, what is the old guy

like to do? He's got a low ball, doesn't he? Apparently he hangs out down near Shep Star. That's where he is. Oh, nice. This is one of the... We haven't really talked about him, but I kind of want to. The pervert elevator operator in this movie? This guy's a real fucking creep, man.

I don't know what's going on with him. This guy works every day, all day. It seems like... I think he's sleeping in the elevator. Yeah, yeah. It's closed for the night. The door closes. He got a little blanket pillow, he pulls out of a little cubby hole. Or maybe he's the dumper and he's rushing

back for that alibi. Oh, no, I was in the elevator that she saw me. Dude, twist ending, there's two dumpers. Oh, yes. Yeah, it's a team. It's like, yes, the girls, yeah. Dumping team. In the first seat, he does that classic move where, like, he sees him with this beautiful lady, he gives him like a right? And I'm like, never do that. Never, ever do that.

Like, I don't need to be encouraged. I'm good, dude. Thank you very much. Yeah, man. Yeah. I know. Thank you. Yeah, I figured it out. I'm a rich billionaire. I didn't need your fucking minimum wage thumbs up to tell me that this was great.

She's hot. Yeah. So whatever. Jason Alexander freaks out about him like and this deal, the deal which like, his affiliation with this deal as the lawyer, I don't understand.

You know, we're not corporate espionage guys. So I guess we don't understand it. But he's got like a real stake of this and he's pissed off because it's like, We're not going to make $10 billion. We're only going to make aid or some shit. Well, they are, of course, because you can't really get into what a corporate rater does or everybody would be like, unless fucking Richard Gere is set on fire at the end of this,

I'm not going to be happy. But what you can do is you don't really discuss what he does. You don't even really discuss what their connection is. So to tell you, other than like he's his attorney, what his power. There is a logo for the Lewis group, which is what he runs. Underneath it, I have never seen this anywhere. Phil Stuckley attorney for the whole thing, apparently. And like that's not happened ever.

That hasn't happened at any office in the world. Usually there's like partners, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, this, this and this. Sterling Cooper, Draper Price. Yeah, exactly. I think he's just trying to like... And lawyer. And lawyer, yes.

I'm back. But this is where he's like, you know, oh, I have to ditch out on this meeting and he's freaking out about the meeting. oh well why can't you you know be to this meeting oh I have a date and he goes with the hookah right in this office just for fucking everybody to hear

this is why you don't tell people this is why you don't tell you gotta keep I'm a date great keep some of those directions secret yes I mean Richard Gere should be at this point just take him aside be like look man I told you because well I was drunk I don't know I don't know why I did that

but you got to stop referring to her like that you have to Stop. This is when they go on like a poor person date where he's taking his shoes off at the park. Oh, my God. Oh, this is the red dress, dude. Oh.

That leads to the red dress, basically. The first thing is the poor person date where we're learning how to eat diners and whatever. Richard Gear is so busy. He doesn't understand what a day off is. Yes. So she is like, you can take days. Because you're rich, you can take a day off.

And you can just go to the park and read Shakespeare. quotations to each other? That is some low red fucking intellectualism, man. Come on. Did you have that book around? What exactly was the reason for this? And this is

when he's like, go out and get the best dress you could possibly get, because tomorrow we're going to the opera, baby. He rolls out a boulder of money for her. There we go. This is your famous with the thing there, with the jewels.

Yeah, this is the box nap. an expertly parodied in the new Netflix holiday film, Hot Frosty. Is that right? I have not seen... Anybody catching Hot Frosty? Some people, do yourselves a favor, enrich your holiday season, and watch Netflix's

Hot Frosty. Because I'll tell you right now, that's Snowman? He fuchs. Wait, so he's a snowman that fucks? It's a... Wait, with an ice stick? Lacey Shabair, here's the deal. Lacey Shabair, she plays a widower, or a widow, excuse me, she plays a widow.

who's, you know, sort of like the mayor of Christmas town in her town sort of a deal. Just sort of casually outside the old snowman area here in her town. The snowman area? It's like, I don't know, it's like a fucking thing in the middle of town we're all making snowmen. Who the fuck cares?

I think the snowman should be able to live amongst us? No, that's... It's not Hollywood Boulevard. That's a Christmas movie thing where there's like, oh, that's the snowman area. Like, the fuck does that mean? Designated snowman area. And in there, there is a sexy snowman.

And she puts a scarf on him. And he turns into the veterinarian from Schitt's Creek. Oh, good. How is... Yeah. And this dude is looking tight. Holy fuck. He's got the thing... I never saw this on a human

being until the film Fight Club came out. And Brad Pitt had like pub area muscle. Oh, yes. They call those cum gutters. They call them... That's the technical term. That's what the doctor's say. If a word, if some word has come in it,

Eric knows it. So that's... So, Ted, the doctors. Listen, Ted from Schitt's Greek, exquisite cum gutters in turn. I'm sorry, sir, your husband was in an accident and we had to amputate his cum gutters. Oh, no!

No! One 900 divorce. Guys, I'm sorry, but guys, the graphics saying proudly presented by Hot Frosty, hasn't come up yet. Andrew, can I ask you a quick question about this? You said the snowman itself was attractive.

Yes. Elaborate. It's a snowman. So you think of a traditional snowman, right? That's a little more like you. Yes. Yes. Total fucking dumb truck ass. Absolutely. This guy, here's the thing, it's kind of fucking weird though, because it's just a ball of snow

up to where you should see some genitalia. But that's all nothing. And then it's like a sculpted, ab thing. It looks like those like training things where you punch are like Steve's forged and fires stab guys. It's just like a torso. It's a torso with like cut abs and looks like the actor.

What horny fuck made this snowman? That's the thing that's crazy. Nobody in the movie knows. And that's actually, that's even the worst. Here I am some weird horny creep. I make a perfect man out of snow. Yep. And I'm like, I love you a man of snow and I kiss it.

And I walk away. And now this little trollope's going to put a scarf on it and she gets to fuck it? Look, he didn't have the magical scarf. Steve? Can I ask another question? Did it have pants on or was there a carrot down there? No, because that's a thing. No,

that's what I said. It's nothing. It's just, it's just like, so the snowman is generally three balls of snow. But this one is two. It's just one. No, no balls. No balls. Listen to what I'm saying. It's just one ball, the biggest ball. Yeah. And then it's from the waist up,

carved into a man. Why does he have legs in the rest of the movie? I don't know. I didn't write it. I just watched it. Eric has moved fully into the why, why, why, why,

why, why? Because I didn't have time to... Hey now. Oh shit, Stone Cold's here. Bum, boom, boom, bum, bum, boom, boom, boom, bum, bum, boom, boom, boom. I couldn't, I didn't have time

to scoped the thighs, you understand. I was coming back to tomorrow to scoped the thighs. Oh, no, it's gone. What hussy took it. This snowman is exactly her character. He's a fucking alien. He doesn't know it. He's being

explained what forks are. That makes sense because he was water and ice yesterday. Dude, I'm not defending this movie. I'm just telling you what Hot Frosty stole from him. Okay. So she's like, hey, hot Frosty, here's a fucking gift for you. She opens a clamshell box. He goes to

take it. She closed it and he goes, That's all I was trying to talk now. What's in a clamshell box? A fucking top hat? I think it's just another scarves. Oh. See, the clamshell is a metaphor for... Of course.

Dude, but he is constantly going inside and being like, as like a hot dude. He's like, wow, is it hot in here? Because he's still like internally a snowman. What? Watch this fucking mind. What the fuck? It's ridiculous.

Can she get pregnant? from this guy? Dude, that's for Hot Frosty, too. The Coco Initiative. I like the Snow Babies. Takes her on a flight to San Francisco to watch the opera, and he's like, listen,

there's two kinds of people. People who like opera and people who get the fuck out of here. Like, she knows the deal. He's like, people who love opera and other people who just don't get it. Well, I guess I'm going to pretend to like whatever you want me to like.

Nobody just likes opera. That doesn't exist. no no no you're either addicted to this stuff or you're just not doing anything no it's even worse though because it's either when you hear it for the first time you fall in love and if you don't you spend the rest of your life trying to decode

the mystery of opera and I was like third option you don't fucking give a shit about it whatsoever that's a better one I would say of the three just this pretentious notion of like either you fall in love with it or you will also like Richard gear like I get it you know all villains like opera, so I get why he likes it so much.

Sure. That's right, yeah. But, like, this whole scene is, like, does she, like, did he bring her here on purpose to be like, look, that could be you? Yeah. Because it's La Troviata, and you're like, oh, it's going to be a happy ending for her, maybe

not. No, he's just laughing, she's too stupid to get it. What? They're speaking Italian. Italian, they're speaking. What? When's the spaghetti? What spaghetti? She's trying to figure. you're out like opera glasses and she's swinging them around like oh my god they're broken alien

things the glasses are broken this thing needs a screw or something i don't know oh it needs a screw all right but like this performance is going on it's a very elegant production of latraviata and so one and she is crawling around this seat like i don't know if you guys remember the simpsons episode where barton millhouse go to see cats yeah and they're crawling around and fascinated by where they're because they're high on like uh squishy syrup that's what she's doing that's doing? Just like, what is this place? Oh, my God. What are we doing? Are they singing? What's happening? Oh, my goodness.

She cries. It's a beautiful moment. You understand. What are these watery things coming out of my eyes? Did we mention they went to San Francisco for this and there was a plane ride? I'm surprised she didn't try to open the door up there. I need some air. This is scaring me. I'm going to flop.

A stuffy old lady asks her what she thought of the opposite. Oh, it was so great. I thought I was going to pee my pants. This old lady almost falls right over with that, isn't that funny? Too late, sweetheart, I already did. You know, you should have contacted me. I have some diapers

in my purse, you see, that you could have put out. Word of the wise, oh, is dipe it up. When in doubt, dive it up. Sometimes you got a double-dipe. Sometimes that day happens. Look, this thing was like four and a half hours long. You bet your sweet Bippy, I double-dived. And if the show isn't

good, I throw it at the stage. So you have protection and props. Oh, wait, are you... Did you used to be a snowman? I've run into a couple of those. Where did you get that beautiful scarf? Also, what's bullshit in hot frosts? Please, I need more. I need more.

It's because... So this dude is running around naked as a J-Birdt. But he's got the scarf on. So you think, okay, like, he's got out of the scarf on, and if the scarf comes off the powers are useless but the scarf's just kind of off through various parts of the movie

so much so that I was like you just fucking forgot to put it on didn't you? You were filming this scene it got all done for the day and you were like oh fuck I forgot the scarf why are you wearing the scarf in the shower

got to got to otherwise all this this becomes a ball if it doesn't rub my ball this becomes a ball if it doesn't. My giant ball.

We should say that for no reason, the necklace, I guess he wanted one more power moves, so he's like, you know, the necklace you're wearing is $250,000. I'm like, why? And I'm not giving it to you, I'm renting it, so like now this is your problem. Right. Yeah, I'll use this, it's your fucking

head. Exactly. Yeah, either the necklace is coming off or the head's coming off at the end of the night. I'm sorry, honey. No, but he's going to be like, oh, where are you going? Where are you going, the bathroom? Oh, well, I'll follow you then. You know, that necklace costs $250,000. That's a classic excuse, right?

You get that necklace, and then you can go into any bathroom you want. And even to me, $250,000 is money. That's real stuff, so I'm going to have to take that back. So they get back to their hotel in San Francisco. She's teaching them to play chess. And boy, when I tell y'all, this is Diet Coke's time to shine. We cut from Lott Traviata to a lot. A close-up of a Diet Coke.

And then we pan out and they're playing Just but the Diet Coke is the most important part. It's a refreshing beverage. Come on. It's sweating too. It looks great. I got to tell you. Just a delicious misty can of Coke, baby. Who's going to want to drink that? You know who does? A great Diet Coke drink.

Heck the hell is on. That's a man you should see drink a Diet Coke. It's beautiful. So he falls asleep early. She's like, she sees him and here she breaks her rule of no kissing and she kisses him and he turns into a snowman

wow your lips are getting so cold what's it burr yes I decided to call it frosty hot man no one knew the original ending where he turns into his snowman you know that's thinking outside the box

honestly that's why she can't take the Owen Hart wrestling uniform off of her She'll turn it to a snowman, baby! No, they kiss, and it's a beautiful making love. They've been having sex before this. That's right, yeah. But now they're making love. Is that right?

And that's a beautiful thing, you know. You know, but would she have been breaking that no-kissing on the mouth policy if he hadn't woken up during the middle of it? You better believe we're smooching this guy while he's sleeping. It's pretty weird, man. So, and then his cum gutters turn into love gutters. And that's a beautiful thing. I love that.

don't think he had, I've seen his. You've seen his? Yes. You've seen his? There's a bath scene in this movie and I was like, oh, there's no cum dumpsters. Wait, did we pan down that far? No, cum gutters. A cum dumpster is a completely different thing. Thank you. Oh, they are here, yeah, I'm sorry. A cum dumpster, dear.

I prefer talking about the snow. That's a different movie. But so they, you know, this is their big moment, like, she wakes up the next morning and she has a changed woman. And it's like the end of the week and he's like, listen, you know, I'd like to keep you on here

as an employee. You loved your work over this trial period of the last week. We're looking to elongate your contract. I'm going to get my lawyer in here

to discuss it. I'm going to leave. I'm going to leave now. Performance evaluation. We'll see if you're going to raise. Cut back on the teeth. Oh, there you got. You got two tonight.

That's good. But no, he's like, you know, I'd like to see you again. I'm going to get you apartment, you know, and there's going to be all this great stuff, and she's like, and what, leave money on the table every time you come by, and he's like, well, that's basically

what I was thinking. Yeah, that's... Well, you say it like that. He goes, this is all I'm capable of right now. What with the tragic death of my father, I hated? I've never treated you like a prostitute, is what he says, to which she goes, you just did. And then, boom. Proceeds to walk

off this very cheap balcony set that they built for this fucking hotel for now. That's terrible, yeah. I mean, The old, it's all I'm capable of. Oh, man, what an old little line that is. It's all I can offer right now? I'm just so, oh, it's so much going on with me. It's all I could do.

It's all I can do. I'm sorry, but I have a wife and a girlfriend. Yes, they're an ex-wife and an ex-girlfriend, but still, I have them. They're here. She explains to him a very, their fantasy about the night and shining armor. Oh, yeah.

When I was a little kid, I wanted a knight and shining armor to roll up and take me away from my. shitty existence. In Georgia? He's like, yeah, when I was a look at, I want to be Batman, so what? What do you want? He's kind of Bruce Wayne,

he's halfway there. He's got to dress up like a freak at night. But he gives this whole long story about like... Bless you. The whole long story about the night and shining armor, and she's like, and then at the end he never said, and I got you

a great condo and kind of like storms out, right? Wouldn't that be sweet? I got rescued from a tower I've been in my whole life and I come out I got a free fucking condo. You never said that it would be in my name. Now I've got some real estate. Yeah, oh, excellent.

Excellent. But so they part ways kind of amicably here. It gives her the three grand, you know? Or San Giacomo shows up. Oh, that's what. Oh, that's right. We got to, have you forbid, we forget this as a character. But I guess the dumper hasn't fucking executed yet. She has evaded the

dumper. There's a series of, there should be a series of shots throughout the movie where, like, the dumpers about to get her. And she's like, a hand with a black glove coming out of the alleyway and Quinn Howard as the dumper because she is like in the beginning of the movie when she gets the first

third of bucks she calls Laura said she can be like oh man you know come by grab this money pay the rent it's going to be great six days past six wait wait oh right aren't you my friend is in that hotel man

my friend's in the hotel with a snowman, I promise. She told me he was a snowman. This exhausts, Hector Alexander, the point was like, all right, why don't you just talk to her on the phone? God damn it, please. And this is the second time we're messing with old people, and I love it. She sees

these, this spies this, like, old couple over in the corner, and she goes, oh, hey, Grandpa, 60 bucks, we'll do anything you want. 75, the old lady can watch. Again, the pearl clutching comes out. I want to do, like, deal. Oh, fuck hell. I don't know.

Wow, I didn't see that coming. Give me 15 minutes. You know, Denise, that's a good price. We've been trying to, you know, get the spark back as such. But so basically this is when Julie Roberts is like, you know, I can't keep doing this. My whole life, do you know anyone that's ever made it? You know what I mean? She's like, well, there's our friends who are systematically being murdered, which we're not going to talk about.

Oh, and did I mention my best friend just got murdered in his video store up the street? Also the plot of Maxine. Well, she's like, oh, skinny, mini, but she was a crackhead. I'm like, but she was a person. Yes. You know? And she kind of, in that scene, that scene is insane because she's like, well, you know, Dominic did his best to save her.

I'm like, are you defending the pimp in this situation? Are you fucking serious? It's like Stockholm syndrome, you know? It's not even her pimp. Oh. Oh, right. Yeah, they're independent operators. Yes.

Carlos is trying to make a bid and he ain't fucking got the money. Well, see, none of that makes sense because there's this whole fucking drug addiction storyline that's just snipped from the movie. No. It sure is.

But so basically, it's like whoever made it, Sid the fuckerella, that's kind of a fun man. And in back of the board room, basically Richard Geer, big power move. They're about to sign the contract

is like, could everyone clear the room because I want to talk to this old bastard by myself? It is a great thing where Jason Alexander doesn't think he's included in the word everyone. Everyone? Fuck, that's always awkward.

No, you two. Get out. Then he goes to his grandson. He's like, what about him? He's like, all right, I'll meet you later. I'll see you later. Wait for me in the car. You know what you should be wearing. I'll give you a, I'll give you a Wurther's original later, if you know what I mean.

You know what I mean? Now remember. Slip you some hard candy. It's apartment 7-8 in the hotel. But they just have this thing where he's like basically, I'm tired of just tearing things down. I want to build things. And this old fuck that has been making fun of his dad the whole time,

grabs him just like, I'm proud of you. Finally someone is. Exactly, something his father never said. But he even says, I hope you don't find this condescending. Oh, I do. Yes. Also, do you fucking corporate raided your dad? Of course, he's not proud of you.

What the fuck? Nobody would be. But so Jason Alexander comes in with the rest of the team, He's like, you can finish the deal that I just made off the fly. Bye. And Jason Alexander realizes what happens. He like screams and disgust. It's weird hearing Jason Alexander curse.

Yes. Because let me point you to the heart attack episode of Seinfeld where he calls Jerry a jerk off and nobody caught that. Very strange. In this he goes, can someone tell me what the fuck is going? And I'm like, oh my God. That's the Mick, not out of your now. That's the McDLT guy.

Why is he cursing? Keeps your lettuce fucking cold, all right? Yeah. I mean, also, why would McDonald's invent a problem? Like, what is... Because that fucking clown son of a bitch

was sitting in his tower, like, you know what we could do? Fucking styrofoam containers, that's twice the amount of styrofoam. And fuck you, Mother Nature. Yeah, well, it destroys the earth twice as fast. Get this done with.

I just... But no one cared. No one was like, oh, my lettuce is too hot. Look, here's the deal. Why I'm going to McDonald's is in the first place is because I don't want to make my own fucking food. So I'm buying something that you're giving me and then telling me,

you finish the job? I don't think so. I think the lettuce is the furthest down on your list when you're going to McDonald's. You're not like going there like, I can't wait to try this fucking lettuce, dude. Oh, bro, the lettuce they have a McDonald's Crisp City, bro. I have just had a hankering for cold tomato.

And I don't know where to get it. There's a grocery store. Oh, what? I mean, look, I've eaten my fair share of whoppers in my day, you know, I'm thinking of a burger that has tomato and lettuce on it.

Yeah, sure. Never once have I been like, you know, this tomato it's just too darn hot. This burger is really messing with this tomato. I've burnt my tongue on lettuce. I hate it.

I'm suing you. But so he's fucking furious, and Richard Gere is out doing something we don't know. Like, somehow Jason Alexander gets to the apartment first. This is where he's out touching grass. Oh, right.

My foot, just walking around thinking about life. Meanwhile, this fucking, I think it is the dumper is coming to the penthouse to take care of this woman. That's right. Because he's like, oh, is, you know, is Richard Gere here? She's like, no. And like, he just stormed. You got to be like, now the door is closed.

Thank you so much. Yeah, he's not here. Fuck off, you little weirdo. You're his employee, yes? Okay, goodbye. Oh, right. You're the guy who did this to me at the polo grounds? Get the fuck out of you.

Where was Hector Elizondo to police that elevator? Because he's wearing a three-piece suit, dude. He's got a briefcase. He's not dressed like the wrestler Owen Hart. He's got a briefcase. He could do whatever he wants. He's used to seeing guys like Jason Alexander. She is just alien.

You know, it gets to a point where he pushes her on. He's basically like, I want to see what the fuss is all about or whatever. You're not a little woman. You're a hooker is what he says. You know, he kind of. looks like a snowman. More in the shape of a snowman than Ted from Schitts Creek.

I guess he does have really thick shins. That guy's all ball. Anyway, he starts grabbing at her. It's really disgusting. He hits her first, which is really bad. Then he's going for it. And then Richard Gear, like, really, I mean, like, out of

nowhere. Out of nowhere comes. Teleports. He beats the shit out of, like, it's not even sad. He gives him, like, one punch and then he's like, get out of here, you. No, I want a full-on fucking Goodfellas beating for this. Yes. But honestly, like, how much

does it really take to beat up Chase Salligan? Exactly. And you're fired. Yes. He doesn't fire him. You need a year fired, which that has to absolutely be the last thing you say to this guy. I made you money. You made me money. Just get out of here. All you wanted was the kill. I'm like, but he just

tried to reap your girlfriend. Like, why are we not talking about this at all? The space alien is mine. Get out of here. He's just shoeing him away like John Lithgow and Harry and the Henderson. He literally boops him on the nose and he's like, get out of here. Nobody wants you anymore, Jason Alexander, go.

Nobody wants you here. Even Amy Yazbeck. She's fucking done with you too. Then a bunch of other little Jason Alexander's emerge from the hallway and walk away with him. Nobody saw them coming. His last line is,

Our Snowman's secret is off. Why do you have this scarf on? But this is when, like, you know, he, like, tends to her wounds and, like, but even still, she just wants to leave, you know what I mean? She's not going to go for this kept woman scenario.

He says, he kind of makes fun of, it's like, oh, remember that time back in the early days of our whirlwind romance when I burst through the bed, the bathroom door because I thought you were doing coke. Well, I'm going to make a joke about that right now. And anything you want, I can get it for you.

If you ever need anything, even a little dental flaws. Wasn't that funny? Remember that? You were just trying to take care of your teeth and I thought you were blowing rails. Remember a horrible thing at the start of our relationship? Let me just throw that now down here. Our relationship five days ago.

Yes, exactly. But she leaves, she goes back, she gets a three grand, and she's off to, back to the Ho Central. Which, Hector Alizondo is like, hey, you can take the limo wherever you need to go. With Daryl, by the way. Daryl's back. Daryl takes the limo wherever she needs to go.

And he grabs her hand, kisses it, and somewhere, fucking Gary Marshall is like, This is why you put up the big bucks for Hector, baby! Disney, it wasn't even in this script. He improvised it. He's a classy son of a bitch, this guy. Look at him. I never would have thought to kiss a woman's hand.

There he goes. You know that Steven Spielberg hasn't made a lot of mistakes in his life, but I have told him, I told him right off the bat when I read E.T. Hector for E.T. And he read. He read. He was fantastic with the M&Ms. Why would you use a popper? You could put Hector in some white makeup of

and dye in a plastic tent, whatever. Now that you're saying, he does kind of look a little like E.T. He looks more like E.T. than Julia Roberts or Richard here. Yeah, it's true. But not as much as Jason Alexander. You should have heard the voice he had.

When he says Elliot on the test footage, I cried. Elliot. Elliot He tells the dude the driver to take her wherever she needs to go which is back to her hotel there and basically the next day

Richard Gears signing out he's like you know I did tell Daryl to take her wherever she needed to go so if you need to stock that woman I got the goods You don't know where your niece lives but I do If you are the dumper and want to finish this job, this is the address.

If you're not the dumper, you can just feel free to ignore all that. Sincerely a fan. You know that woman you left here? You know that woman who came here without a black guy but left with one? I know her address, so I can just give that to you. You're a safe guy. Of course. Finish the job.

She announces to Kit that she's moving to San Francisco. Francisco. Kit, by the way, T-minus, like, 72 hours before she's dead. I'm sorry. Oh, yeah. No, no, no, no. The dumpers coming for her.

Don't worry about it. Even, like, Vivian gives her this money, like, I want you to use this money to change your life. She's like, I'm a drug addict. Yeah. And remember how I use that money

for fucking rent for drugs? Guess where this is going. Because that was only $300. So guess what I'm going to do with $3,000? Right, yeah. It's a big ball. some gum in there if you want it.

A couple of stray bazooka Joe comics wrapped up in it, yeah. That's good as currency. Why not? No, I'm going to go to beauty school right after I see my dealer. Exactly. Beauty school tomorrow, man.

Yeah, that will be the titular beauty school dropout. But from the distance, you hear Princess Vivian. And this asshole's hanging out the sunroof. At 10 a.m., this piece of shit is blaring opera. Out of the fucking limo.

I just work a fucking double. Shut the fuck up. I just got the kids to sleep. Goddana, what are you doing, blaring that orpra? My snowman husband's going to be so pissed about this. I'm going to put the scarf on him. He's going to kick the shit out of you. He actually has legs.

I know that's surprising. Come, baby, get the fuck out of the freezer. We got to fight out of the street. I hear you're fucking upsetting my wife. My lady. My human wife. Yes, I am a snowman. He still has like a carrot

where his nose should be. He's like, I will take you down. I will take you down. Throw ice cubes at him. Yeah. You just come after him with like a blow dryer, you know. And they're trying to make like this like a big, you know, like a big...

It's a big Hollywood finish. He climbs the thing. He gets over his fear of heights, which remember that was really fucking important in the movie. Yes, yes, of course. He went out on the balcony finally. Oh, boy. And, like, you know, he grabs her and they kiss,

and he's like, you never told me. What happens after the prince rescues the woman? She goes, well, she rescues him right back. Feminism, baby! There it is. It's a good thing that the guy goes by. He's like, you have dreams. Dreams all over Hollywood.

It's beautiful that you have dreams like that. I think Hollywood Boulevard is literally the boulevard of broken dreams, but I guess we... It's fine to end your movie there. That is the end of Pretty Woman. Hell yeah. That is it. But we still have 20 more minutes left of hot frosty,

so stay in your seat. I'm telling you, make your holiday season just a little spicier. Hot frosting. And thank you Netflix for putting this on. Oh, hell yeah. Yeah, we hit movies sponsored by Netflix. Sure.

But yeah, we got to get going to thank y'all for coming out. Give yourselves a round of applause. Thank you, guys. Thank you very much. We were making jokes, but it's always great to be in the city of Boston. Absolutely. Love coming here. Love playing Laughston, by the way.

Make sure we're tipping and everything. It's the holiday season, times are tough, all that stuff. So don't cheap out now. Now's not the time to cheap out. Give over that big ball of money. That's right. Pizooka Joe bubble gum wadded in there and all. Actually, they wouldn't appreciate that whatsoever.

Probably not. Clean currency or shit on your credit card, that's it. But before we get out of here, we do want to do. want to check in really quickly to see what the internet had to say about this movie, and the best way to do that, as some of you may already know, is to check in with the IMDB user

review section. Mm-hmm, mm-mm-mm-mm. Got a couple for you here tonight before we get out of here. Two very different reviews. One's a one-star, one's a ten-star. Let's start with the one-star. One out of ten stars, subject line, where is the pretty woman? All right.

Wait, what? Excuse me. She's a snowman for half the movie, you'll just keep watching. I do enjoy, like, so when I say what's, when I read what's in this review, just remember, this person thought to attach a spoiler note to it. Okay.

Written February the 21st, 2018, and I feel like this one, I have to read, like I can only presume the guy sounds only because his username on the, IMDB is Travis Bickel 1986. Oh, okay. This guy's got some interesting ideas.

I don't think Julia Roberts fits the star role. You're insane. Not exactly a pretty woman to look at. She is not worth stalking like Travis would do. I can think of actresses who would fit

the role much, much better. Like Sibble Shepard. No, no, no, a 14-year-old Jody Foster. Yes, also. End of review, which I also wrote. What? That's it.

He wrote end of review at the end of the review. That's the end. That's Travis Bickle, 1986. Ew. Which, I have to say, there were no spelling or grammatical errors, which is very impressive considering he was clearly writing this review while polishing a gun.

Yes. So, it's 1980s. Do you think that's when he... I would assume that's when he died, hopefully? No, that's when this dude is born. Yeah, weirdly. Every time. All right, here we go.

Last one. Ten out of ten stars. Subject line, still my favorite after almost 30 years. Wow. Okay. That's nice. Ten out of ten stars written by Marco Lucchich, 26471. That's when he was born?

No, that's his pin code. Bosco. Bosco. You beat me in a Bosco, dude. I knew one of us. It's got to happen. Well, I'm glad you both did it. Written February, or,

what the fuck are we doing? May the 11th, 2019. I am romance fan. Oh, no. Absolutely. Okay. And this is the only movie I watch from time to time. Okay.

Was this written by a sentient sandcastle? Uh-huh. Uh-huh. As a sentient snowman. Thank you, Julia. Thank you, Richard. You made my life a little better. No, Hector?

What the fuck? I know. That's fucking bullshit. That's unreal. No, I feel like, yeah, where's Daryl? Thank you. Where's the Daryl love? That guy's driving that fucking shitty

boxy limousine all over Los Angeles. Not a thank you in this 2019 review. Love you, Daryl. So I feel what's going on here, though, when you read this review, I think what happened is oddly, Travis Bickle, 1986, hijacks the review. Okay.

Because it's all that nice stuff, and then you just get, would give everything just to get one smile from Julia. Oh, no. For me, she is the goddess. We found the dumper. Yeah, yeah, there's a dumper.

Right there. Show yourself, Jumper. I'm really hoping he's writing this from prison. Where was I? For me, she is the goddess. even now like a fine wine we've been

we hate movies from New York City thank you guys thanks so much for coming out y'all happy holidays we'll see your beautiful faces next time bye bye thank you bye everybody

Thank you. Thank you.