We Hate Movies - S15: On-Screen Live 12.2.24 Wicked & Gladiator II Reviews, a Stallone Secret Movie™️ & More!

Episode Date: December 11, 2024

Originally Broadcast on YouTube, 12.2.24 On the triumphant return of On-Screen Live after a few weeks' hiatus, we're back and reviewing a couple recent releases including Jon M. Chu's Wicked and Ridley Scott's Gladiator II, going over the weekend box office, looking at a Sylvester Stallone Secret Movie ™️ & more! Be sure to tune in to an all-new On-Screen Live on our YouTube channel this Friday, December 13, at noon/eastern! We'll be reviewing what we've seen of Creature Commandos and Skeleton Crew, recommending some Christmas-themed trash from Netflix and beyond, and paying tribute to the main man himself, Jason Voorhees, by recommending some holiday viewing for this Friday night! This holiday season, make the Official WHM Merch Store your one-stop shop for all your gifting needs! T-shirts? Prints? Phone cases? Stickers? We got it all! Head over to our Tee Public shop and check it out today! From December 1, through the entirety of 2025, we’ll be donating 100% of our earnings from our merch shop to the Center for Reproductive Rights. So head over and check out all these masterful designs and see what tickles your fancy! Original cover art by Felipe Sobreiro.

Well, well, well, if it is in all, you know, if it is in all, y'all, you know, if it is in all, y'all, beautiful faces. What's going on, everybody? Welcome to On Screen Live. My name is Andrew Jupin. This is the show for Monday, December the second. I know we've been off the air for a little while here. We had a lot of travel and whatnot. The travel continues this coming week. We'll get to that a little later in the program. Hope you all had a great Thanksgiving if you were, you know, doing that whole thing. And hey, who's decorated? Again, if you're doing that whole thing like I am, the house is already decorated, man. The tunage has changed. changed over fucking Christmases here. Speaking of people who are here and bring in my buds, we're going to talk about all sorts of movie related shit today. First up, you know him, you love him. Mr. Stephen

Sadek. Howdy? Yeah, speaking of travel, I got delayed. I don't like that wire. There you go. That's so much better. I got delayed in Cleveland coming back. Man, delayed in Cleveland, that's a fucking canceled Tom Waits record.

It's not the worst situation to be in because they have a Great Lakes brewery there in the airport in the airport really good beer good food we're having a few and I can see this couple down the way a little ways from us really get trashed they're like we've been here

for hours we keep getting delayed oh boy then you know we finally go back to where the area is our gate wait there I pull up a comic book a Batman comic book guy same dude comes up to me and he's

like, hey, man, so who's the best Joker? And I'm like, oh, no. Fuck. Jack Nicholson, he's like, who's your best Batman? I'm like, oh, fuck. And we go, he goes, Batman, we talk to the riddler, the penguin. Oh, my God. And then he's like, oh, he's the best Bain. I was like, there's only one that's Tom Hardy's like, no, there's a couple of Baines.

And I'm like, yeah, I know. Oh, there's a couple of Bains. Not the Swedish fucking wrestler. Okay, Tom Hardy edged out the. Swedish wrestler for Batman and Robin. But so, because like James Adomian does him on the Harley Clinton show, was it just live action presentation? We didn't get into it. I didn't want to get into it.

I don't want to get any of it. I got it. Oh, man, that sounds horrible. And hey, here's a dude who I know thinks that story was horrible because he's a guy who hates talking to drunk strangers. He prefers to be the drunk stranger. Mr. Eric Siskin. That's right. Now, Steve, this is a crazy story. Are you sure it wasn't a mirror you were in?

interact with this couple getting trashed at the end of the bar you know some bars have a mirror they keep looking at us they keep looking at us turning into john shevers the swimmer but it's me being delayed in a fucking uh oh no i was the drunk the whole time oh man it could happen yeah eric loved that uh hat you got in there buddy yes thank you a young met a young man in Seattle, Washington, I think it was. Or was it Portland? I don't know. It was Portland, I believe.

Yes. Yeah, so I had requested this hat a long time ago on our Beverly Hills. In relation to the Beverly Hills Cop 3 episode, maybe it was a Twitter thing, but it stands for the deputy director of operations for joint systems and interdepartmental Operation Command. Yes, it is the Judge Reinhold hat. Yes. And that tells you how fucking talented Judge Reinholds.

this man. I mean, and who knows how many takes it took Landis to get that in the movie, but he fucking nails those letters so rapidly and that's like, you know, it's a gag for his character in the movie, but man is it impressive? Because I can't do that. We were all reading the letters on the hat. Nobody could read

the hat. I'm going to start wearing this around pretending I'm going to cop on the train. Oh, there we go. I bet you could fool stupid people with that, dude. I guarantee. I bet. I'll make him tell me who the best Batman is. Speaking of somebody who's got his favorite batman And I think

What was he doing here? It looks like he's got a hat on. I don't know. Here's Chris Cabin. Is he good drink? Dude, that better not be your cock. I swear to God if you pull off.

And that's your. Where's my hat? It's his cock. I can't believe it. Where's my hat? No. Good girth on that boy. There's no way that's his penis.

That's his penis. No. Is that what's, okay. Hold on. I'm going to go check my office. Hold on one second. Chris is just yelling at his dog. It's tough. It's rough in that household.

I don't think anyone else is home. There you go. Oh. No penis. I didn't know you could hear us, Chris. Hashtag no penis. Hashtag no penis. Yeah, it wasn't penis. It wasn't penis. It wasn't penis.

I'm sorry, Eric. That's what Tubin said in his defense. Yeah, it wasn't. Oh, no. I think he was very odd. That was my penis. I'm apologies, everybody. That was stupid stuff.

That was the thing. What is going on, everybody out there, including some great folks that we got to meet in the PNW, which, by the way, if you were at the Seattle and Portland shows, thanks so much for coming out. It was great hanging. Those are pretty fucking shows. But some long-time listeners, like Miko Fish and Bucyrus got to meet those fellows in person.

Really cool. I mean, that's the fucking great shit we love about getting on the road, man, is meeting people. We spent the weekend with Bucyrus. I don't know. We did. We kept running into both of them, yeah. We love running into the chat in the wild, so say hi if you see us around. So, Chris, you were searching for that hat, and then you proceeded not to wear it.

Is that right? No, I just need to know where it was. Okay. Because I have to plan, because I'm going to play Santa Claus at the end. But I need to be prepared for it there. But of course, guys. Very, very important question of the chat here. We're going to put this one up on the big board from T.

Jay Gaines wants to know. Were the P&W recording's good? Teage, my friend, both of them. Solid stuff. Those will be released next August. Hell yeah. Hell yeah. What up, David Hart, sucked, foul, rose.

The professor, wow. We got someone with a degree in the chat. That's amazing. Can we get an honorary degree? Yeah, we need some of those. So, yeah, I mean, we've been gone a long time, you guys. And I got to say, there was a lot of graphic changeout I had to do for this week's show.

Usually it's like, I can keep the vast majority of the shit, but this time, not so much. Because it's all new at the box office. Let's take a look at the numbers from this holiday weekend. This is highest gross. Hell yeah. So get ready for this stuff.

some of these we'll be talking about by the way these are like uh there'll be some delayed reviews this week because like I said we've been off the air we've been on the road we've been in pre-production to get on the road so you know shit happens but here we are we're back and um let's see I realize I skipped over my new gimmick so we'll do that after

but we'll get to the numbers first because you don't want to you don't want to tease with that but so here we go comment at number five a lot of these are holiday themed if you can even believe it something called The best Christmas pageant ever. I kept seeing this and I'm like, what even is it? Is it like, are we talking to Christmas? Is this?

Oh, yes, that's right. This is the Christian one. Oh, really? It's a secret Christian one. I don't like the idea of, if it's Christian, you're saying it's Christian, but they're burning the Christmas tree. There's an angel being hung in some type of murder scenario. Yes. Some type of murder scenario.

We don't know which. Is the tree really part of the whole Christ part of it? I would assume, is it a painting? symbol. If I remember the trailer, it's about, like, I think Judy Greer is like, has a good family. Judy Greer married to Pete Holmes in this movie. Yes. A good nice Christian, good family. And then there's another, a dirty family that like ruins everything. Oh, yes. It's like poor kids. Yes. And they are invited. Yes. It is like a family. It's a family. You saying this is reminding me I could see this trailer. And they have to be.

part of the pageant they ruin it in various ways but we learned that ugly and poor people are okay too. Yeah we learned that we shouldn't shoot four people in the street I think by the end of that move I think I hope. I mean so it's in it's week for a lot of people

hopefully are learning that message another 3.2 million. You're looking at 32 million domestic here on a one 10 million dollar budget so this thing's doing just fine I'll tell you this though we got a saturday satellite review here

in from our buddy on the authorized podcast Johnny Pomato he says he loves this book it's kind of a classic subject matter is inherently faith-based but they really hammer home the harder that they need for this adaptation but otherwise not terrible okay not terrible he says

so there you go praise the Lord on that one praise the Lord and pass the ammunition something an uncle of mine says a lot oh yeah okay oh that's a that's a golden oldie you let God sort them out. That's not me to judge anyone. I can't say if anyone's good or bad.

I got to just indiscriminately kill. I'm to indiscriminately kill abortion doctors. That's my job. Got to send him up to the boss and the boss will take care of it. He'll be able to the boss. Appreciate it. Speaking of the boss, Santa Claus himself finds himself in a little bit of hot soup in our number four film. Red one.

Oh, God. This fucking thing. I'm shocked this is number four. Dude, get ready for. fucking sticker shock look at these numbers right here another 12.9 million dollars for this movie we're talking 76 million domestic 149 million uh global the bummer is it cost them somehow 250 million dollars to make this movie so things aren't looking great right now for amazon mGM here but it will be a timeless classic for years to come of course no it's not right well i mean

that's what it's definitely like it's so trying to be like there's They leave so much shit unexplained in this movie that you're supposed to clearly put. The next movie, we'll explain that. We'll get to those. Don't worry. We'll get to how all the origins of all this horse shit that you're going to want to definitely see more of.

So we're trying to set up like a franchise with this stuff? Oh, oh, for sure. Like eventually, it's essentially like men in black but for holidays is the thing that, and that clearly they were going to be like, we're going to do Halloween. We're going to do Thanksgiving. We're going to do all this fucking shit eventually.

So can I ask you, so you've seen this? I have seen it. I have seen it. What is the title referring to? Is that Rudolph's, uh, I think that, no, that is, no, that is, no, he is red is, it's like the code name is Santa. It's his code. Yeah, it's like, yeah, it's like the, the secret service calling, you know,

the president, the chief or whatever, you know what I mean? Like, whatever their call sign is. Eric, you are for, you're getting this mixed up with the, the Brasasas, plastic, Rudolph. the Red Nose Rim Job. I know it. It's a classic. It is a holiday classic. That should be in the theaters. That would make you 12 million.

You know what? We are heading towards Brasers' features being on the big screen. That like, give this 10 more years of this stuff really cracking, maybe. We had porno theaters for a long time. I know. I'm saying the A&D and Regal. That's what I get a Brassers. Brasers only feature. Bring them back because.

you know, everyone's like, oh, I don't, I'm a little uneasy with sex and movies. Yeah. Force it on you. Yeah. I think there's probably laws against showing both of those. You know, you can't show fucking Moana 2 and, you know, Debbie does Dallas in the same. Why not? Just check the, just check the tickets.

Well, yeah, exactly. And you got 4DX, you know, you know, the check. Now you got 5DX where the guy's jerking off next year. That's it. Right. And you know now, five for five fingers, 5DX. and you know what both rules and sucks about laws is that they change pretty regularly

look at you trying to get this fucking pervert legislation going that's I the one who holds sway over all of this sick fuck by the way here's a question I have why is it that like Dwayne Johnson all the time because he's thrown this out multiple times now and it's blown up in his face I think every time where he's like we're doing like whatever movie and this movie is going to change the landscape of whatever fuck like black Adam

Oh, get ready, DC Universe. And with this shit, it was like, oh, man, get ready. We are going to turn the Christmas movie industry on its head. We are reinventing the Christmas classic. And I was like, why don't you try and just making a good movie? Why don't you stop trying to reinvent the fucking wheel and make a good movie? That's the only way he could sell these things. Like, nobody's coming through.

Dwayne Johnson, are you fucking serious? Like, no, this has been a long-term problem. Like, it just doesn't happen anymore. And like, like you said, he's doing this. Saffty brother movie so like maybe this turns him around maybe we get something with that I really hope so you know we've lost his charm too like I don't think he's good at promoting movies anymore he used to be great at it yeah that all that shit that happened with the black atom release that did it that was the really that was it really was you know you're totally fucking right man and you know

I hope the safeties can fix him because at one time he was a charismatic dude who you know good or bad regardless of the slop I looked forward to seeing him in things and I just don't anymore. That's the Benny movie. And then the Josh one is the Chalemay one, right? Yes. Correct. Yeah, yeah, yeah. They split the brothers. They split up. The Cohen, they did

the Cohen move earlier, like much earlier. And now because of some weird, like, guild thing, both of those directing partners might not be able to ever come back and work together again. So that, you know, that's weird. So anyway, we're going to keep it going here, folks.

We've got a lot to get to you today. Coming up, we get to a review of this from a couple of us who saw it, but Gladiator 2 still rocking and rolling this holiday weekend. I got it here in week two another 30.7 million, and this is doing quite all right. It only dropped 44%.

We're looking at 320 million dollars globally here on a $250 million budget. They spent a metric fuck ton of extra money on a promotion for this bad boy, so it's got a way to go, but it's doing all right. It's doing all right, and it's got a good fan base, you know, like, I might not really like it, but, you know, I write, I write my pan and everyone's fine with it. These, the wicked fans, toxic, toxic dude bros going nuts. Really? On everyone. Really?

I've not, I've not seen them, but like, is, can I ask, Chris, do you not read your, the comments under your letterbox? No, I, this has been a long, some dude was losing his mind. I was defending you. Oh, why would you even, why would you even look at it? Why would you ever? look at it. This is a long-standing thing with me. I never read the comments. Never. Not in a million years. Chris, I face the toxic dude bros out there. That's right.

On the battlefield. Yes, of course you are. You are the gladiator, really. Thank you. I'm kind of like out to see this week just because nobody liked Wicked, nobody liked Gladiator too. Like yesterday we actually finally had time to go to the theater. I'm like, do you want to see like a good movie? So we wound up

seeing Seed of the Sacred Fink? which is amazing. So, like, that's, I just didn't, like, you know, I didn't want to do the three hours of Wicked for part one. And I, I couldn't just do, like, mediocre gladiator just to do mediocre gladiator, even though Dead Zell's probably good, and it. Like, I just couldn't make myself make that happen. It's like a really, like, the thing with John Chu is, like,

the movies always look like a really cool, like, Super Bowl commercial. Like, yeah, all right. Well, let's save it for when we're actually. Oh, what we're going to do. Yes, of course. But gladiator, too, like, also. Yes. uh so we will just uh get through the rest of the numbers here yes uh wicked coming in at number two

it had its a big weekend last weekend of course uh but you know nothing to sneeze at here man another 80 million dollars looking at jesus god 359 million dollars across the globe oh yeah this dropped only 29 percent 14 and a half million dollars of the shit is i max and i would wager it would be higher if it wasn't also battling uh moana two and gladiator for i max seating yeah um but Yeah, I mean, the numbers on this are crazy. And the funny thing is, if they didn't pointlessly break this up into two movies, I'd be saying they'll be making another Wicked.

You got to milk it. You got to milk it for all it's worth. Speaking of milking it, oh yeah, what's that? No, I mean, I just wanted to say like, people are like, oh, they guys were doubting Wicked, too. It was in my the Vulture Fantasy Movie League. I've had it drafted forever.

I believed in Wicked. Yeah. No, I have it on mine, too. And I believe in this next movie which won the weekend baby oh yeah i had this one too i had both of them so this is hopefully will skyrocket me but yes moana two in at number one with a rocking 135.5 million dollars for this guy is it because now honestly like i'm on facebook more because i took twitter off my phone and like i need something to do all i'm taking a shit so i'm flow i go through facebook a lot what facebook is right now is at least for me

fake AI movie shit like it's just all it's all live all like this oh man they're doing a do you know they're making a a Christmas vacation reboot with everybody like no they're not and like so I have to like do that they are doing the live action

Moana right that is really happening that is that is happening that is insane that they're doing that right now especially like you're still making the animated one you can't do that you can't do both they're doing that that fucking

a Bufasa movie which looks terrible and they're doing the there's a what's the little fucking gleeplop guy there there's a Lilo live action exactly all those are live action but to do Moana again like while the the tree is still fucking ripe in your yard

just make Moana three in a couple of years it'll be fine I know that's they are going to make Moana three that is going to happen anyway that doesn't it's going to be it's going to slow down it's going to be Moana and Live Action

Moana and Live Action Bwana 2 and Moana 2 and we'll just keep repeating this has gotten to be correct. And again I haven't seen any Moana's that I'm sure that they're I know that friends with kids love these actually no I saw the first one that was pretty good and the second one I'm sure is totally fine

but like I just be careful Steve the Disney adults are going to be coming for you. They'll be coming for you. Well you guys remember the weird thing that was going on with this whole Moana and live action and Moana 2 like everybody was gearing up for Moana live action they were like

oh yeah you know DJ is in it like they're doing this whole thing and then it was like by the way secrets slip this right in we also made a Moana 2 like on the download and that's coming out first this was this whole weird wild release with these Moana movies man

and especially the fact that the Rock is at both of them it's just like beyond confusing and beyond pointless. But Steve, people said they want more movies. Here we are. Oh, man. Eric, Jamaican be crazy. Thank you.

This is if, last piece. This is if anyone took seriously those black and white versions of movies that people put a Blu-ray. You know what I mean? Like, because that's, and that's actually a better actually experiment in like aesthetics at least. You know what I mean? I thought, uh,

the Deltoro one for Nightmare Ali was excellent, but you know what I mean? Like, Johnny demonic in black and white is great. Really good. That's, you know what I mean? At least that's sort of like, oh, here's the movie in a different way as opposed to like, we're going to remade, like, we're going to spend all this money and effort to do this new, this movie that we could, we could spend to make seven excellent movies. We'll make one bad one that you've already seen.

Well, one may be very good one. You don't know. Stephen, how do you launder money if it doesn't cost a lot? I mean, like, let's, let's be, let's be honest here. You know, to do a 30 million budget for a laundering scheme. Come on. someone pointed out in the chat here yeah a good friend Tata Hababa chimes in they are indeed doing a live action how to train your dragons on that trailer with

butler he's back how do you do that dragons aren't real it's gonna be like the the stitch like yeah like it's computer it's the computer thing and everybody else is live action if Roger Rabbit sucked that's what you're dealing with I I want to see him get sucked by that wife of his. Now we're thinking. I'd like to go to Deviant Art and you'll be just fine. Well, maybe I'll do that for the rest of the show. You don't know.

You'll be beyond fine. A movie that I enjoyed more than the film Wicked. Queer is out in limited release. Just check in elsewhere around the box office here. This is the second movie this year we're getting from Luca Guadonino and did really well. Seven screens did $189,000, which works out to about 27K per screen. green nice fucking number man there is interest in this movie at least

in the small markets they've put it in I don't know we'll see what it does middle of the country and whatnot but I anticipate 824 expanding this nicely as it deserves to even though I didn't like the pop music in it but it's a solid movie I think and we'll be interested in you guys

have this on your vulture list anybody I don't but I do it makes me worried about I did have challengers I was kind of expecting challenges to make a big end of the year everybody's watching it. Here comes the award nominees and I don't think that's going to happen. I think it was

too early and now queer is eating its lunch. It's Luca lunch so it's kind of difficult. I am looking forward to saying this. I haven't gotten to. Oh, was I the only one that sawed? Yeah. Oh, oh, oh. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. Yeah. I mean, Daniel Craig really fucking good in that movie, y'all.

So that is what's going on around the box office. Now really quickly, because I I got these fucking posters and I'm going to do this. Top of the box office. We're going to do it right now. Top of the box office really quickly. In 1995, would you look at this? Number one on this day, speaking of Disney.

And 1999, speaking of Disney franchises, top of the box office this day, Toy Story. There you go. Are we on the fifth or six one of those that's coming up for it? It'll be five next. And then they did,

but is that counting buzz, year or whatever that is? No, that would be just an option. But isn't that it's the world of Toy Story for sure. But under your sequel legislation it's about the man that inspired Buzz Lightyear Eric so it's not technically

You should remake that live action now. Yes, definitely give it some time. In the year 2001 on this day, number one of the box office Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone. We're making a

another one of those, aren't we? That's a TV show. We're doing it. And you know what, dude? The election, HBO is now like, we are so behind J.K. Rowling. Shut up everybody. Yeah. This has been a referendum and the country's going the right way. Finally, here comes HBO to make another mistake. Yeah, all these people. All these people that hate, you know, gay relationships or trans people, keep saying mandate. I thought you didn't like that. Yeah. oh man what a J. Leno joke

that was good you hear about this mandate oh man in 2000 on this day number one at the box office I know me and Chris were miserable as fuck cleaning up after all the little piggyes coming to see the Ron Howard

Grinch movie dude some of the worst fucking garbage cleanup I ever experienced in my career as an usher good God by the way you brought it up, Eric. So I want to say shout out, Jay Leno. He's looking like the Grinch these days. Oh, what happened. He got hit.

He, like, fell down a hill or something. He fell down a hill. I went through this. I went through, like, the Zapruder film. Apparently, he was staying at Hampton Inn. And my first reaction is, I don't believe this story, because why would he the richest man on Earth, stay at Hampton Inn? Yeah, absolutely not. No.

This town, this, I forget exactly where it was, but there's nothing available. He'd have to, like, stayed in a city very, very far away for his stand-up show. So he stayed at the Hampton Inn and there's a there is a hill outside of this Hampton Inn that people have made a path down to like the Chili's or something. So he was like, wow, you know, got to get somebody to eat. And then he started to go down the hill instead of walking around the road.

Right. And he ate shit and he busted up his face and now he's got this eye patch and all this bruising. He's looking like Sam Fuller. Yes. And we're going to say get well soon. Jay. We love Jay. I love Jay. This was Andrew and I right after I think the Portland show tried to go

restaurant. No, Seattle, I think. Going restaurant to restaurant and they kept it was drive-thru only every time. We walked about a quarter of a mile in a circle in the pouring rain. That was and then we just got DoorDash. That was bad. Yeah.

I mean, like look, without Jay Leno, I don't get to have David Letterman making fun of Jay Leno. And that is, that really is something I love quite a bit. That was some solid material. I can't, I can't, I can't hurt. The last one from 2008 on this day, number one of the box office, I was legit surprised this fucking top this high for Christmases. It's, that's a movie people still watch, man.

It's out there. It is out there. Wild. It'll be on the program next year. Oh, yes. It has to be a disaster. by the way speaking of those kinds of movies I finally

because I've never seen it I found out what that Ben Affleck James Gandalfini Christmas movies surviving Christmas I didn't I thought that it was just like it's a Christmas movie about an asshole family but it's Ben Affleck is he's a millionaire and he's paying the family that lives

in his childhood home to pretend like he's their son oh yeah baby I got to see this psycho shit it is a poor that will also would be. I mean, we're coming down to the wire with these Christmas movies that I know are hard sales. I rewatched Crampus last night to see if that might work.

But those two for sure are going to be on next year, I think. Those Cranpus movies, man. I just don't care about Cranpus. I don't think it's funny or fun or scary or I don't know. That movie is one of the most cowardly movies of all time. It's okay and that it's the most cowardly movie of all the

good first half. Yes. Blows it at the end. Interesting. Good first half. it at the end. Oh, by the one. Sorry, last one, the family stone. Yay, L.A. is saying that is a guarantee and I have to have my wife on that because she makes me watch that movie every year. And it is the worst movie. No, and she hates it too. To be fair. But it is the worst movie. Yes. Yes. I saw that shit in the theaters. Yeah, I did too. Do it that way you will. But, oh man, I had a nice transition there, but I fucked it all up. You fucked it up. So,

whatever on Wednesday we'll be in Boston you know what that transition fell down a hill from the Hampton is seriously Jesus fucking Christ I'm trying to get to the Chili's Steve fucking snipes me anyway we'll be at Laugh Boston this Wednesday talking pretty woman in our final

live show of the year that's going to be a hell of a good time I have to say that's right Wednesday December 4th if you are out there in the vicinity of Boston come on through I would love to see you hell you know what if you're in Nevada come through why not if you got time

do it get on a plane and come see us I go get on a plane all the time to come see you somebody's like oh it's uh you know man let me know when you're in Maine I'm like I'm not gonna be in Maine I don't know what I would have been in Maine come on to Boston you're pretty close that's the same thing

it's all you all have the same football team that means you come to the show yes exactly that's right that's right my football team rules you have to show up our buddy lives in Portland he says it's a 90 minute bus ride It's not too bad. Beautiful. Yeah, tickets over on our website, WHM Podcast.com. I was putting the pre-show video together yesterday.

Got me all pumped. Really excited for this one. Ready to talk Jason Alexander in one way or another. Some more news, of course. If you are not hip to our Patreon, you're going to want to get on that, especially at the $8 level or up because on the 27th of this month, I think it might be the final piece of Patreon comedy of the year. get ready for our final

2024 commentary we're talking hangley's Hulk hell yeah look at this bad boy rewatched this I don't know maybe like six months or so ago proud to say I was wrong about that movie it's fun as well

I mean it'll be fun to like you know dunk on and whatever oh yeah I mean it's insane it's an insane movie but like it has so much character as compared to anything that we've been seeing from the MCU like it just it has it all over it. I can't. Angley cannot make a normal movie. He's not capable of that. And I have to like basically

cancel my plans because I'll have no voice after. Oh my oxen! Yeah. Et cetera. Five cups of tea. Just around you. Ginger and lemon would probably be the best. Big time. Shout out to Felipe Severo, of course.

Another fucking banger that we will 100% be putting in our merch store until they fucking take it down and Steve get ready for this. Here's another transition man so get ready. Speaking of merch. Oh, I got something to say to it.

Yeah, I fucking knew it. So Steve Sadek, speaking of merch, take it away. Yeah, so I don't know if you've noticed. The world has changed for the worst in the last month since we've been doing this. And as such, we are trying to figure out a way

to make a small impact in somehow helping a little bit and not feeling so helpless and terrible. So from now until, I don't even know, at least a year from now, we are going to be doing, we'll call it all the way until next year at least. Any and all merch

sales, the profits will go to the Center for Reproductive Rights. That's where it's going to go. Every nickel that we make goes right there, so it's just going to be fuddled right into trying to keep people being able to have control over their bodies as best we can in the

shitty situation we're in. That's where we're at. That's what we want to do. so you know now is a good time it's around the holiday season you want to get your friends some fucking ugly faces on their t-shirts

you're not you're not you're not you're not you're not line in our pockets so there you go that's right yeah head over to our website whmpodtest.com click on that merch tab

it takes you right to our merch store there's tons of designs the Hulk one will be up soon but there's a shit ton so look through listen perfect for the holidays like Steve said

four fucking uggos in cartoon form on a t-shirt. You know what I mean? I mean. Doesn't get any better than that, folks. Great stocking stuffers. And again, if you're like, those, I look at this, you look at this sweater, like, that guy's got enough money. You're probably right.

But now it's going somewhere better. So there you go. Exactly. Give it to the Patreon. Give it to the Patreon. Patreon.com slash we hate movies. All right. So with all that being said, let's get to some on-screen reviews.

Chris and Eric, take this one away. We're talking rotten or royal with Ridley Scott's Gladiator in fucking just garbage fucking wow just garbage I liked it a little more than Chris I still

the problem with it is have you guys if anyone out there hasn't seen Gladiator 2 have you seen Gladiator because you've seen this movie then it is that's what I was worried about man it's beat for beat basically

almost the exact same movie which is really weird Of course, they make it, you know, about the legacy of this, that, and the other thing. But I will say, I think Ridd is still doing better action combat and the scale of these fights better than any other commercial director currently working. I think I would take this over a Marvel movie, for instance. Sure, sure. That I can absolutely say, yeah, I could see that. Because these are guys, they've got guys in costumes.

I couldn't believe it. And they've got a few of them. It's not all digital. But like, what's being left unsaid is it's a worse made version of what was going. Like overall, like top and bottom, a worst product. Like, the first one does have some pretty, like, obvious usages of CGI and, like, digital effects. And it was the time. Like, it was 2000.

Like, you couldn't really hide it at the time. Like, you were going to see it no matter what. It's just so you used it sparingly. yeah this time it's everywhere and i just didn't think it had scope the way that a lot of recent uh rid has had scope napoleon i think had scope uh last duel i think had scope this i don't think does like the opening battle felt like a game of thrones battle and like not like it not in like some like a big overarching way it felt very cut and very like narrow in what it's focusing on I think you're completely right, Chris.

But I will say, I will take Game of Thrones TV battle over almost every other, you know. Do you agree with what the cinematographer was saying about Rotten Ridd that he was lazy on this one, that like, he overreliant on CGI and the camera doesn't move as much and blah, blah, blah. Like he was like talking a bunch of shit about. I haven't believed it. I didn't see, I didn't see this at all. I saw these comments I didn't look at it like to see the whole interview but I did see the lines he did

like I believe like more than anything I believe this was the one like he did because they offered it to him everyone said yes and he was like okay I don't have one that's like ready to go I just did Napoleon what you know fine I'll do this I'll keep working

and do this thing and just didn't care I'm like that that's the feeling I get from it it's the first one it's the first one in a while that I've felt that from him. Like, even how Saguich, which I don't like really, you could tell he was alive and awake while doing it. This one.

I wonder, you know, that makes me wonder if there was some like back room dealing where it was like, okay, like I will make your gladiator to you. Everybody wants this but me. I'll do it if you let me do whatever down the line.

And we should see like what his next like things are that get announced. Like, if there's a real. If there's a If there's one that seems like a big risk and it's also with Paramount, I would be like, oh, I wonder if he got to make this because he agreed to be gladiator too. If this is the devil's bargain, I have to get

to get my third of his alien movies. That's fine. I understand that. Fuck yes. But I need that movie. Oh, quick, because I just fucking had to inhale a Romulus. That's like, I nearly put me out. I did not like Romulus. But the thing about this movie again is

here's some, here's sort of silver line. you know it is doing well at the box office it is a historical epic type of thing not based on i know it's based on another movie but that movie wasn't based on anything right yeah well i think that is nice i would like to see more there's an upside to that you know there's an upside to in its second weekend you know in a holiday weekend it still makes over 30 million dollars like exactly and that's good yeah so um i i I don't know if I'm ever going to see this one, honestly, because it's just sort of like... Well, I think for Denzel, it's kind of almost worth it.

But there's a lot of script problems. I could tell you how to fix this thing. Well, I'll tell you what. I mean, this sounds to me, like, because I was, we were, before we came on the air talking about, like, shit we hadn't seen or whatever. And I was about to say, like, I'm still making plans to go see Gladiator. But all this talk about, like, the cheap CGI and whatnot. This sounds like a real Andrew rental time. Yeah, exactly.

kind of dealer ship Paramount Plus, honestly. By the way, there's a bunch of people in the chat saying Gladiator was based on a book, but IMDB does not list that. Wikipedia does not list that. I don't know. Maybe there's a secret. Is it a coloring book? Yeah, we got two people.

I see Weiner and Fowl. What's the name of the book? We're curious. So, yeah, you know, that's a, it's a bummer. But seriously, if it gives us the movie that he wanted to do where it was just all the fucking Prometheus fucking architect guys. I want that goddamn movie.

I want to see what that looks like. That's never going to happen. Sorry. We've already moved on. If we're going to do the Dune Messiah, you can do the David alien movie. You can do it. They're also doing whatever the,

what do you call it there, the Noah Hawley show too. Oh, yeah. But that's like a, in that way. I don't even know. I don't even know where that's in between something. Senator, it's in between something. Okay, I found something about gladiator,

apparently inspired by a novel. Those are about to die from 1958. I don't know. If it's not credited, I'm not crediting it. Sorry. I got to stick with the unions, okay, pal? This is a tough time. Union strong. Come on. Up and next, something I caught

yesterday. Chris caught a couple days before me and caught shit on letterbox. We're talking wicked. The new one from John M. Chu out right now, of course, doing killer business. I'll say I went into it like obviously if you listen to our Wizard of Oz

episode I fucking dig on that movie you know hardcore um actually just watched I don't know in anticipation for this maybe that returned at Oz for the first time terrifying fucking shit any fucking parent that showed that to their child should be jailed

that's insane that's an insane thing to make for kids I'm not really worked I'm not sure if I've ever seen it with Fruza Balc where they're trying to do fucking electroshock therapy on her and like I saw it once. It's like sucker punch with Wizard of Oz kind of thing. It kind of is. And like

every, I have this hang up, but I've told you guys about it before. Pictures of old-timey Halloween costumes always look terrifying. Like if you see little kids dressed for Halloween in like the 1930s, it always looks terrifying. All of Dorothy's little buddies in that movie look

like 1930s Halloween costume. It's fucked up. But so anyway, I wasn't familiar with this musical. I mean, I know what it is you know but I never heard any music I didn't care

so I went into it with basically just a base knowledge of Oz and having seen some films John M. Chu directed one of which I liked quite a bit, crazy rich Asians and one I sort of did it in The Heights obviously this one is closer to In the Heights and I think Chris I do agree with you

my biggest problem with the way this dude directs these things is he directs musical numbers the way you direct a fucking gap commercial or an old maybe commercial and for me and I said this on Letterbox I think when you're capturing a musical number for a film audience you know

I'm not saying stick a camera in a theater and film the Broadway show but like you have to have patience with the presentation and you have to let shots sit a little bit longer because like I was having so much trouble orienting myself in the scenes like where are we what are you showing me it's cut cut cut cut cut cut cut cut cut cut

I want to see these people fucking dance and sing and like we're cutting away constantly and it was driving me absolutely nuts um that's probably my biggest hang up about it i thought all the performances were really great again like i think before this i'd seen cynthia rivo in one thing in the film widows um and are yeah no totally great in that movie i think i like that movie uh a little bit more than the general come on guys who else watched stephen kings the outsider all those episodes on hbo oh yeah oh yeah what was that it's a jason baitman

yeah oh sure yeah she's really good in that they kind of said okay they kind of set up like ooh season two is like no oh it didn't have oh that will not be happening how is ariana grande because i feel i feel like her the the blonde hair on her it's uncanny valley to me it makes her look a little bit like a robot but uh i have to say again like not really familiar with her nickelodeon work so i don't i mdb told me that i saw her in that awful movie don't look up which she's in that yes Hey, I'll believe you, but I can't remember a lick about that. So this was like me sort of seeing her do anything for the first time, I feel. And she had me laughing.

I thought it was pretty funny. She, I thought, and maybe because I was, she was playing the character as if the character was high through a lot of it. Like that was her thing. Like, maybe she's just stoned a lot. But it was, you know, it was funny. But yeah, the blonde hair, it was kind of bizarre. Everything in the movie looks fucking washed out. That was another problem I had.

Looks like garbage. Dial back. Dial back. Like, where's the white balancing in any of this? It looks like absolute hell. I've seen the toxic dude bros about this movie pushing back saying it looks beautiful. No, it doesn't. That's an incorrect statement.

They can keep talking nonsense if they so wish. It's okay to like a movie and get wrapped up in a movie and be really into a movie. I will say that. And good on you if that is wicked. This is like it is. I mean, it's exactly what Andrew. Like it's a perpetual motion machine. It's the thing that just keeps going.

Because it's made for like, it's supposed to be for adults. for babies but like it's made for babies like it just moves really quick you can't like stop put you can't be bored by these things because they keep changing like every shot just it will not stay for a minute you just and like so then you don't get any like you don't get

to pull back and see a performance a really cool twirl anything that would really make you want like a musical a song and dance thing that would like make you want to do it stop and listen to someone actually sing a song like that just can't happen because you have to keep moving the thing has

to keep moving. And it's all, I mean, I know they put some real stuff in it, but like it all feels like digital garbage in the background. Like I know like parts of the upfront are not, but like even so, it just kind of all bleeds together for me. And like any sense of lighting is just kind of all done because it's all done digitally. So like you don't really get to have any character in the shot. Like I mean, I'll, I'm going to push back on how it looks a little bit. I think the sets are really wonderful. I think. The costumes are really great. Again, there was just something about the white balance that they were using in the cinematography. Everything just felt like, not everything, I shouldn't say that, but a lot of the scenes and a lot of the important scenes just felt like

I was watching it on a bad TV. And it wasn't like the projector. Like I would know that difference. It's just, it was washed out. Some of the backgrounds were flat. But again, like there were things that were holding me to it. Like the performances, again, I thought everybody was really great. Top bottom um gold bloom kind of perfect for playing the wizard of oz like he just has he's really good at doing like a huckster kind of stick which is great um i guess my one question to both of you andrew who liked it more and chris who thinks it's the worst thing that's ever happened anybody um is obviously the two part is a problem i imagine in pacing and spacing and do they just chop it off like that abysmal across the spider verse well no it's chop it in half

It stops at the natural end point of the first act of the musical. Yeah. But the problem as I see it with this is that when that happens in a musical, so it's the big, you've probably heard them at least talk about the song, Defying Gravity. That's the big number that Cynthia Rebo sings to close out the first act of the music. Close out this first movie. And so she does it. And when they do it in theater, you know, on Broadway,

or wherever it's playing. The cool thing is you get to pick it back up in 15 minutes. The problem here is like this is done for a year and it just like something about that and knowing that that's what was about to happen was like really kind of suck in the energy

out of the ending of the movie as far as I saw it and like it ends and I was like cool song I guess I'll see you next November why aren't you coming out in March or so like it just seems the release date of this just seems so weird but like for a movie to end on a curtain call for a first act of a musical I guess sometimes it can work and sometimes it doesn't and so it doesn't feel like it's cut off

like there is a natural like she's all like fuck you I'm going to do my own thing and like flies away and so that's like it's an ending enough feel but it's also like not that substantial of an ending so you kind of feel like all right I mean it's the same fucking thing with the Harry Potter's at the end like they just found a part that seemed good enough to kind of stop and it's like all right well see you later I guess you know and at least that it was a shortened span of time that you

had to wait so this you know I don't know it's it works for a lot of people I have to say though it comes up it's this big beautiful wicked old fashion title card you know looks really cool and like it holds for a number of seconds and then sneaking right under it just at the last

second I went part one three point one right right in there Dude, and I- The lollipop field should bring up part one. They probably would. I mean, I had a little bit of a good fall on the theater because it's such an afterthought like, oh, right, this is part one.

Oh, yeah. I mean, it's just, I mean, the feeling you're talking about is, it's opportunistic. It just feels like, it feels like you're just doing this because you know this will make you more money, which whatever, like, I, this is what they did with, um, I mean, I don't know how you would have ever made it into one movie. So, like, it's fine by me. But also, like, this is what weakened the fucking. ending of Dune part one for me

a bit is that like you don't you have to wait to see how this thing's going to conclude and it just happens that I think Dune 1 is a way better made movie sure a better act and all those things I just think it's a better product so it doesn't bother me so

much and Dune Part 2 is fucking great so like it pays it off from what I hear from most people the second the second part of Wicked is the mostly agreed on

weaker half I'm gonna put our buddy Johnny Pomato back up here he does have some familiarity with it and he confirms act two

may be reworked for the film to be a little more substantial because he remembers it falling off a cliff after intermission yes

that is what I've been here I've again I have not seen it I haven't read the book so I can't really speak to how they what you're being

stirred back to by watching this in theaters like I assume if I had seen it and liked it, I'd be like, oh, I remember that, I remember that, you know, the, it's, it's the MCU thing. Like, you get to be like, oh, that, and that, and that, and that. Sure. Remember that? They get to do their own fucking rib, fucking elbow shit. Yeah. So, like, I get it, but like, this is just such a weak, like, feeling thing.

And it, to me, I know you said it was a sum of it, to me, like, it all feels flat. All of it feels like just something that was meant to be put on streaming so that while, like, I mean, I said this in my review. Like, somebody needs to take a three-hour conference call. They need to fucking, their kid to be watching something. Here you go. This works. It'll be over in two and a half hours.

Ready to go. No problem. I'm like, that's what I felt the whole time. But like, keep in mind, it's okay to like a movie. A lot of people do love this. And if this is now, you get your freak off, then more power to you. That I wouldn't be putting next to, you know. I will say this.

props to my audience at the Alamo Brooklyn yesterday when Chelsea and I went to see it I realized like when she told me the showtime that we got tickets for I was like oh fuck 1040 in the morning I was like it's going to be riddled with children it's going to be awful these kids were so well behaved well done kids and parents everybody like nobody was obnoxious really it worked out absolutely great and by the way our buddy Nico Fish pointed it out this is the one that did it the best

when they turned around Matrix 2 and 3 in the way they did. That's what you want. And you've had this movie, like, you should have just done it, but whatever. But that's it. We're coming up to the top of the hour here. We got one last thing to talk about something that I tried to get in under the gun and I did not. But Eric, you did. And we'll just say that sometimes, you know, big celebs will put out a movie and they kind of don't want anyone to know about it,

maybe for tax reasons or whatever. And these are what we like to call Secret Movies. So Armour is a film that kind of stars Sylvester Stallone. Is that right? I think he's got like six minutes in the movie or so. Oh, nice. He apparently did one day. Some guy on Letterbox said that he got paid like over three million.

million dollars for one day of work and i'm going to believe a guy on letterbox over any i mdb trivia anymore i mean he's got to get i mean he's got to get a couple of these in and i understand the six because like in what the couple months he's going to be the secretary of entertainment oh yeah he's frank and be taking over party and down from how he looks in this movie i think he's going to be the secretary of pushing up daisies any day he looks old and frail and i don't know why we keep acting like this guy's supposed to be scary. Just let him play a grandpa already. Italians can be grandpas too.

They certainly can. Absolutely can. But yeah, this is, this is going to be a very quick review because there's nothing to this movie. Jason Patrick and his son have an armored car, job thing.

They're driving around for like 20 minutes. We finally get to the smallest, shittiest looking bridge I've ever seen. You know, I want like, I don't know, show me a nice bridge. Sure, yeah. The whole movie's, on the bridge. I want to look at a nice bridge.

Oh, wait. This is the bridge movie? This is a bridge movie. All right. Let me just tell you really quickly. I have seen a trailer for this and already fucking forgot that this was Stallone and it was called armor, but I have seen the trailer. That's the way, Eric, I just do I do have to ask, are you a bridge

aficionado? Are you, do dabble? Oh, you dad? Okay. Yeah. I like, I look at a bridge. I'm like, okay. Pretty good looking bridge. Yeah. At New York. bridge. New York City. You got some nice bridges down there, you know? You got any

favorite? You eyeball that Brooklyn. You're like, that's a nice bridge. So they're on the bridge. Right on the bridge. Stallone and his guys show up to rob it. You never get any motivation really. So it's just like so dull. And then it's just like they're trapped

inside. The armored car. And a little squabbling back and forth eventually. A little spoiler. A little soft spoiler. Okay. Stallone might be a better guy than you thought he was.

Oh. And the movie ads, it's just, there's really, it's nothing happens. Not much happens at all. The times there are guns and stuff. I'm pretty sure the muzzle flashes and smoke are CGI. Sure. Yeah. That doesn't surprise me.

Definite skip it. It is really terrible. And there's a conspiracy theory that the guys credited didn't even, direct the movie that someone else did. There's all these conflicting things. So it's fun to watch a piece of nothing trash and people

are arguing and quibbling about. But it is it is by far worse than Gladiator 2. It is worse than we could ever dream would have to be. This sounds like hell on earth. Eric, I got to tell you I think you should shift. The

Aaron Eckhart Thomas Jane's strains have been a lot more fruitful. Yeah. I'm going to now, after he made this guy, this this, this fac-acta guy, this Stallone talking at Mar-a-Lago. I'm like, oh, geez. Does that end our

co-promission contract with the Tulsa King or no? Well, the Gleap Glossary will be moving on. We did, if you are a Stallone head, we covered Tulsa King for about an hour on the Gleap Glossary. We sure did. And while I will continue to watch that show, we won't be

talking about it. No. Are you going to move on to Landman? I'm trying, I put, I put my, my, my, my, uh, my, uh, toes in the water of Landman. I watched the first episode. I have to find the time to, uh, fit it in. I couldn't this weekend because I was watching Armor. Okay.

Uh, well, I'll just, uh, chime in and say, I am up to date on Landman. And, uh, it's, it's, it's Billy Bob doing his bad Santa character just as an oil man. Like, he's just a guy who's pissed off constantly. He's constantly fucked off. up. He's constantly hung over. He's got a family that like hates and loves him and exploits him constantly. Allie Larder's the ex-wife who's always given him trouble. There's stuff to like, man, I have to say. And you got John Hamm doing a wild accent. Dime Moore's his wife. They're like, you know, living high off the hog of an oil company kind of a deal. So, you know, whatever. It's a

Taylor Sheridan show. You can get on board of this or you don't. But that's going to do it for this episode of On Screen Live. Of course, we got stuff coming to you this week, including tomorrow. It's our live episode from Jersey City last Christmas. We're talking to Santa Claus. Absolutely, hell yeah. This was a banger show. It's a

banger episode. The recording's great. This was a lot of fun. Getting us in the holiday spirit. It's all pretty much holiday movies this month. Five shows are a lot of fun. Oddly enough, we have one this week on Wednesday. Oh, yeah. Right?

Yes. boss please come see us if you can come on up or down wherever you're coming from pretty woman it's gonna be a blast of a coming sideways coming from the sea I don't care from air if you want a parachute in we will

absolutely one if by land two of by sea to laugh Boston this Wednesday and also hey on the Patreon of course Patreon.com slash we hate movies we're kind of giving ourselves an early Christmas present on Thursday so we love movies episode all

about Lethal Weapon 2 which is a kickass I've got it by the way sequel that yes we know isn't set at Christmas but it's our Christmas gift to ourselves so we had a lot of fun talking about it including Steve who saw it for the first time

it was a blast it's so much fun it's just been revoked it's such a great fucking line dead to fill yeah and I think it's okay for us not to have one thing not a Christmas movie for most people it's just another day man just another day of the week

So there you It was just another day of the week for Riggs and Murtaugh when they started battling Crooked South Africans and lethal weapon too and then one final Christmas gift to give everybody

to get things going this season Oh no Christ Oh man Fire that intern I'm going to fire that intern once again All right we're going to get out of here folks Thanks so much for tuning And it's been great to be back

Programming note on screen live Returning next week but not on Monday We will be on the air noon Friday the 13th. For special broadcast, yeah. So you're going to want to tune in for that, but just because Monday we're going to be busy.

That's why we're moving it around. No real reason. It'll be proud of the 13th. That'll be fun. That'll be fun as fuck. Yeah, well, we'll do something with Jason related, I feel. Sure. But that's it. It's 1 o'clock. Thanks for tuning in, y'all. We'll see you in Boston, hopefully. And if not, we'll see you next week. Friday the 13th. Until next time,

I've been Andrew Dupon. Stephen Sedeck. Eric Cisker. Chris Cabin. Take it easy. Y'all have a good week. Bye-bye.