We Hate Movies - S16 Ep833: Tombstone (1993, W❤️M, with Jamelle Bouie)

Episode Date: November 25, 2025

“He looks like he’s about to go on tour with Waylon Jennings” - Chris on Kurt’s mustache On this week’s episode, We ❤️ Movies Month comes to an end as we welcome back our bud, Jamelle Bouie to chat about the stacked-cast Western, Tombstone! How incredible is the casting job here? Would this thing work without the majesty of Kurt Russell? Was Sam Elliot the only one who already had a mustache going into this production? And, hot damn, do we miss Bill Paxton. PLUS: Doc Holliday and Wyatt Earp play Guess Who together! Tombstone stars Kurt Russell, Val Kilmer, Sam Elliott, Bill Paxton, Powers Boothe, Michael Biehn, Charlton Heston, Jason Priestley, Jon Tenney, Stephen Lang, Thomas Haden Church, Dana Delany, Paula Malcolmson, Lisa Collins, Dana Wheeler-Nicholson, Joanna Pacula, Michael Rooker, Harry Carey Jr., Billy Bob Thornton, Paul Ben-Victor, John Philbin, Robert John Burke, Billy Zane, Wyatt Earp, John Corbett, Peter Sherayko, Buck Taylor, Terry O’Quinn, Frank Stallone, and Robert Mitchum as The Narrator; directed by George P. Cosmatos. This episode is sponsored by Sonos! This holiday season, give the gift of Sonos sound! Right now, Sonos is offering up to 30% off during their Black Friday Event. Don’t miss out—shop now through December 1, 2025 at sonos dot com. And also by Rocket Money! Cancel your unwanted subscriptions and reach your financial goals faster with Rocket Money. Go to RocketMoney dot com slash WHM today. That’s RocketMoney dot com slash WHM. RocketMoney dot com slash WHM. Get your tickets to our 15th Anniversary show this December where we’re talking all things Arnold in Total Recall! It’s gonna be a gas and we wanna see you there! Click through for tickets now! Throughout 2025, we’ll be donating 100% of our earnings from our merch shop to the Center for Reproductive Rights. So head over and check out all these masterful designs and see what tickles your fancy! Shirts? Phone cases? Canvas prints? We got all that and more! Check it out and kick in for a good cause! Original cover art by Felipe Sobreiro.

Hey, y'all, shout out to Sonos for sponsoring today's episode. You know, this holiday season, you're deaf going to want to give the gift of Sonos sound, y'all. And we'll be back later in the program to tell you exactly how you can do it. Hey, folks, do not forget that just coming up, just a few short weeks from now, Saturday, December 6th, we are going to be celebrating 15 years on the air. That's right. Holy Toledo. We're talking the We Hate Movies 15th anniversary show.

It's going down at the Bell House. beautiful Brooklyn, New York. We're talking all things total recall. The one with Arnold Schwarzenegger, of course. The one with Sharon Stone, of course. You're not going to want to miss this night of revelry and nostalgia and Arnold impressions. It's all going to be happening, folks.

We want to see you there. It's going to be a good time. W.HMpodcast.com to get those tickets. They're going fast. You don't want to get sold out. Listen, 15 years is a long time. we're so happy to be celebrating this monumental occasion and we want to see you there

WHMpodcast.com, get them ticks. All right, here we go. We're super stoked to welcome back our bud, Jamel Bowie, to the program. We're talking the stacked cast film. That is Tombstone. Enjoy. This week on the program,

this film may just have the most stacked cast in cinema history. We're talking Tombstone. I'm Andrew Juppin. Pepperoni. Oh, Stephen Sade, Agnes. Eric Sisker. Chris Earp.

I'm your Huckleberry, Jamal Bowie. And we love movies. Hello everyone, welcome to We Love Movies. Thank you for tuning into the fine program, as always. That's right, this week. Finally getting around to this guy, 1993's Tombstone, sort of directed by George P. Cosmitos, we'll get into it. And here to help us talk all about it as a good friend.

Welcome him back to the program. Once again, Mr. Jamel Bowie. Hey, man. Hello, y'all. Thank you so much for having me to watch this movie, which is a perfect that guy movie you know it's like oh it's that guy oh yeah i think you're missing like m m at walsh and that's almost it like if he was here i think it would be covered emm at walsh maybe uh who's the guy who's the guy who plays the um the president and clear

and present danger and he plays like the commander and the thing oh yes oh yeah he died not too long ago oh man yeah what's that guy's name well yeah what's on his tombstone what was that name that one. Worked with Kurt Russell, obviously. In the thing, which we know. Oh, that guy. Yeah, what's his name? I actually worked with that guy's

grandson years and years and years ago. Yeah, and one, out of nowhere, he was like, Donald Moffat. Donald Moffitt, yes. One day, this dude was like, oh, yeah, like my grandpa passed away. I was like, oh, sorry about that. Yeah, he was an actor. You may have seen him. He was in like the thing and clear and I was like, what?

Your grandfather is that dude that I was. I was like, I was like, what? Your grandfather is that dude that I've seen on TNT a thousand times. But here's the thing, even his grandson was like, oh, he was that guy. Yeah, he knew. He knew. You don't know him, but he's that guy. He probably barked at him

like a dog, you know? A junkyard dog. This is a, yeah, I mean, this is speaking of TNT, this is like all over. I've watched this movie so many times on cable, but like end to end like twice. Like once when I rented it as a kid and then last night,

everything else has been like hotel TV and whatever else. In pieces, yeah. It's sort of what, like, I think they put TVs in hotels for this movie to be broadcast inside them. I will say, uh, this might be, this might be kind of stunning, speaking of like seeing this in bits and pieces.

This afternoon, first time front to back for me in this movie. Oh, wow. Really? Yeah. I just, it's one of those like, uh, uh, cultural osmosis. Like, you feel like you've seen a lot of it plus all the, like, TNT broadcasts you know I've watched parts of this movie on like three separate we hate movies

tour runs over the years like but never all the way through and you know pretty fun time in its entirety it is a long one that's this is and it's a story that has been told I would say better in much shorter form

otherware of most most I mean everybody my darling Clementine being the most the best one I mean what's the next one on your list the Star Trek episode. I would probably like Wichita or Doc are both very good. Are you talking that Star Trek

episode where there's like zero money in the budget and it's like barely a set at all? I love that one. Yes. It's like a saloon doors to nowhere. Yes. Yes. Oh, that's right. Fuck, that's funny. The opening of this movie just lets you know things aren't exactly right

with this movie. It's like, here's Robert Mitchum. I don't know. We got to start it somehow, folks. Just sit down. We'll get through it. 1879, the Civil War is over and the resulting economic explosion spurs the great migration west. Farmers, ranchers, prospectors, killers and thieves seek their fortune. Cattle drovers turned cow towns into armed camps with murder rates higher than modern day New York or Los Angeles. Are you the court reporter for this movie?

I have a pretty solid impersonation of Bob Mitchum. This is my second time watching this movie and I hate to be this way, but as soon as Robert Mitchon said, the post-sival war economic boom, I was like, that's not right. There wasn't a post-of-war

economic room. No, sir. I heard they found silver in Arizona. Maybe that has something to do with it. Let's just go to Arizona, okay?

If everybody thinks they know something, let's go to Arizona, then. Let's just go. I enjoy that that opening sequence when they are gunning down that Mexican wedding is shot like a

sandpack and paw film. Yes. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Powers Booth himself looks like he's straight out of a late 60s, early 70s, Western. It's almost like watching this, I was like he sort of looks like they just took footage from a way older movie and somehow dumped it in this one. He looks like so out of time. Nobody sweats like that man. That man sweats with the best of him.

It looks gorgeous on him. And he just like, when he's really focused and mean looking, it just it works so well this i just rewatched uh uh southern comfort with him so damn good yeah uh is that the nicholson movie uh no the uh i'm thinking of going south going south is what you're thinking of yeah yeah this this is i think it's walter hill um sounds really good yeah yeah i mean yeah it's the cast that makes this movie and to jemales points the squibs are the second most important cast members the squibs are great in this movie

People just get opened up by these guns. Oh, it's great. It's the way it should be in movies like this. I'm looking at you, Predator Badlands, you fucking bloodless, cowardly movie. We used to make things in this country. Yes, right. That's gratuitous violence in our movies. There should be squib factories everywhere.

You could go to a city in America and you would find a squib factory and they were going every day. That's what happened. My grandfather worked hard mining squibs in the skibs. Squib and the Squibb mines. Sorry, Timmy, there'll be no Christmas this year. Canon films closed down. No. Oh, no.

All these people panning for fake blood and by the creek, I guess. Filling like broken old capsules of squibs and like, no, no, I swear they're still good. No, no, you don't have to make any action movies. You keep on making Moscow on the Hudson or whatever. No, no, thank you. That's not a great one.

speaking of canon films can we talk real quick about how cosmetos got on board here this is like this is some weird stuff so the the guy who wrote this movie uh what jaffy kevin jare kevin jaree that's what it was uh was also trying to pull double duty as directing this movie and like instantly fell behind with it and they fired him after like a month so cosmetose comes in and cosmetos of course of cobra leviathan first blood part two uh he'd yet to make 1997 shadow conspiracy which was his last movie but like from all accounts though oh shadow conspiracy yeah shadow conspiracy is awful did you guys do it uh did you and john do it on the podcast we did it on the podcast

and I think I remember us both being like apologizing to each other I am so sorry I'm so sorry I did that to you has anybody else seen Cosmetose's rat horror movie of unknown origin, which rocks. No. How is that, Chris? I know that we just left Horror Month,

but really, if you get a chance, it's Robocop is trying to have a normal life. Peter Weller, you mean? Yeah, yes, Peter Weller. Oh, I thought you meant there was like some sort of cyborg character in this movie. Apologies. Yeah. No. Crop versus a giant rat? I think that's cool. I think a robocop

domestic drama, honestly. Yes. Yeah, totally. It's part that too. If I get my hands on that realtor. I am going to kill him. I can't believe these rats. Robocop too sort of turns into that a little bit when he's stalking the X-Y. Yeah, he's like driving by the house like all

crazy divorced cops dude. Definitely. She took all my Oreos. But to hear about it though, like because Cosmetose was like dumped in. They were already a month into it. They'd shot like everything with Heston already. And so like this dude

was also scrambling. So to hear certain people tell, including Val Kilmer, like, Kurt Russell kind of directed a lot of the movie and then refused credit for it, which is crazy. Interesting. It sounds right. Apparently, he might have even been involved to why Jare got out because like he was like, purpose, possibly purposely

delaying stuff. Really? That's, I mean, that's, that was on IMDB. Yeah, the hot boss. Wait, Kurt was purposely delaying or Jaree was Kurt was delaying him to make him look worse because he wasn't happy with how things were going. Oh, interesting. Apparently, like, you can tell, too, that this movie, the script for this movie initially was this huge thing, sprawling thing, with all these subplots that kind of, the movie just

kind of condenses as it goes towards the end. It's like, just a series of gun montages. Yeah, man, sure. But editing does a lot of work in this movie. But I think you're totally right, because I was noticing there's just moments in this movie where time just skips ahead. Yes. And they do a really bad job. of conveying that until it's like way later in like that part of the movie

for the most part I think there's like one time where it's fine oh I think because like Sam Elliott still has his like arm in a sling so you're like all right it can't be that much time has passed but like like the jump from when they're like we shouldn't do this anymore to it cuts in like Sam Elliott's

the sheriff all of a sudden wait a second what the hell's going on how did that happen so it is choppy but man talk about like a movie just resting on its cast alone you know the one thing that does shine through above everything else is Kurt Russell I think this is one of his best movies

like this is him really going to the like even as I mean like you have Robert John Burke in here for some reason so many people here who could steal a show wait RoboCops in this movie Robo you should have said RoboCop 3 RoboC is in this movie

stick with your thing he gets shot he's one of he's with he gets shot with Thomas Hayden Church and the other guy he's in the okay corral he's the mustache man at the okay man so there's even a purchase alum in this movie now there is indeed yes Chris I think you're right I think this is Russell's best

like star performance yeah yeah because I mean I'm sure thinking of his other big ones you mentioned the thing but the thing is so much like a that to me feels like a like the star is the group like it's very ensemble performance like

you couldn't take Russell out but he isn't he isn't like the center of the focal point of that film but in this he I mean he is he is like a focal point of this movie like as much of this as much as this is like a that guy film I don't think this works at all

without just like his insane amount of on screen charisma yeah absolutely although like even in the okay corral when he goes oh my god right before it happens it's like that's such a Kurt Russell delivery that gives like a tempo to that scene and of course

obviously the late great Valc and I think the chemistry is really important with him and Val Kilkenes yes yes big time they work so well together that like the final hospital scene where he's like begging him to just leave so he can die and like

he won't see him die fuck that's great that's some of the best like I mean the best Kilmer of all time but like Russell just has to like sit there and react to a lot of it and he does a really great job like in that scene not just in that moment with him like trying to like like yeah we're playing cards come on man and he's like which card don't you want and all that stuff like man it is so so good but if it was like

if it was the all kilmer hour instead of like it of like russell being the anchor then it's like a creepier weirder movie if it's all the sam elliott anchor then it's like a stiffer more kind of whatever sort of movie but like russell there's something about him that like this movie can sort of revolve around him or always he's like comes back to him he's the anchor of it and it just the russell for whatever kirt russell just sets the right tone for whatever this movie has to be russell rules for sure now you know what's creepy and weird you use those words is seeing your dad your friend's dying you place a biography of him on his chest that you wrote i don't know i don't it feels like your story's been written goodbye uh i saw

i will hold off of my eric sisco biography until you're well on the ground thank you oh man come on you told me I could read some of my friend Eric Cisca. I mean, the trick is to give the biography where they're still living and it's sort of like, you know, Eric Cisca to 2025 and he's like, what? And then you have a gun in your hand. Oh, now we're doing it.

The things, if I'm dying, now I want to read the book. I want to know what they got wrong. I want to do my version, do some notes, perhaps. We've long said that Eric Cisca's biography would have to, I think autobiography would be the best version. And it has to be called Eric Siska, too

much is never enough. That is, to me, this is the Eric Siska, big, big letters. That's what I want. Thank you, because I have lived life to its limits and now it's my time. Kurt Russell's 90s are really weird. Like, it's just

I mean, the dude doesn't work a lot. I think that's probably he doesn't want to. 91, he's got backdraft. 92, unlawful entry. oh yeah yeah that's a domestic thriller also another domestic thriller captain ron yeah dude that is a hair-raising thriller that movie stay the fuck tuned on that one uh 93 it's this uh forest gump he's Elvis Presley as a voice uh 94 94 also Stargate 96 executive decision 96 escape from LA 97 breakdown 98 soldier and that's the 90s that's the 90s for Kurt Russell that's a

Honestly, that's a, that's a big VHS rental 90s, right there. That's a solid blockbuster Friday, pick-out movie. Yeah. You know, that's how I saw Stargate. You know, that's, that's a blockbuster film. Big time. Absolutely. And it was still in like the, it was the red case, which meant it was only like a two-day rental instead of three-day.

Because it was so goddamn popular, apparently. But yeah, there's, you know, there's movies in there, like, uh, Like, is it unlawful entry? Isn't that him and, is that Ray Liotta in that movie? Yeah. Yeah. Ray Lota's the bad cop. That is the husband.

That might be an episode. Yeah. That's, it's kind of worth the spin. We should do that with Pacific Heights. Yes. Like those are, both of them are shot really well,

but they both kind of suck. Spoiler alert, I think about Michael Keaton's death in Pacific Heights, at least like once every other two, three months or so. Because it is just one of those like, damn that guy got killed i mean that's how that's how i think about um segal's death and executive decision yes one of the great movie deaths of the 90s oh absolutely you will you will yeah

but yeah so the all the the the cowboys bust up this mexican wedding and a priest puts a curse on them and we just basically the irp boys meet in arizona uh wyatt is looking for a quiet life And just, I guess like back then, you didn't see your brother for like 17 years because like you moved down the street. Wait, is that not usual? Is that not? I mean, it's been a while, I was what I'm saying. And you write a letter. You're like, hey, let's move to the same town, dude. And he's like, sounds good. And how about our other brother can also join? And we'll have like three houses right next to each other. And it'll be like some weird Mormon complex or something. Yeah. Are you, are we starting a religion stop?

in your telegram kind of thing. Because, honestly, you look at how flirtatious they are with each other's wives and you're like, I don't know what's going on here, Earp boys.

I mean, middle of the 19th century, sex communes out west, definitely a thing. With these mustaches, absolutely. Biggamy is king. I'm a priest

in the Earp way. I bring erpism with me everywhere I go. I got to say this dude, this uh the the the um groom here when he fucking says uh go to hell and powers booth just goes you first and murders him yeah like this this scene really successfully sets the tone of this god damn cowboy gang because like between that and then dude michael terrifying more than he's

ever been being holy crap is wringo in this movie man when he's fucking uh he's harassing the one guy he's like, your fucking Spanish is worse than your English. That's not what he said. Great line. Absolutely. That goes into the hole he was quoting the Bible. Behold a pale horse, a man on him was death and hell filed with him. And we'll get a reprisal of that from Russell later.

Absolutely. So, yeah, the boys meet at the train station here. And dude, I look, Kurt Russell immediately given this dude shit for beating his horse. Hurts, don't it? That's fucking great. It's just, he's, I mean, I love that he's kind of a bully. at least in the beginning, like he's slapping Billy Bob

Thornton around this horse. He is telling everybody how to chew their gum, man. Yeah. Absolutely, dude. The Billy Bob scene is one of the best scenes in the movie

and one of the best like Kurt Russell intimidation scenes of all time. This episode's brought you in part by Rocket Money. You ever feel like money just disappears each month? It's easier than ever

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Virgil and Morgan Virgil is Sam Elliot and Morgan is my goodness the late great Bill Paxton who's just awesome in this apparently according to George P. Cosmetos every mustache of this movie is real except for the guy who plays

B-Han that's like the Cricket Sheriff because he had a previous engagement so he had a fake must everything else including this bristle broom that Russell is rocked incredible I want to I hope they advertise that on the television. Come to the tombstone.

Real mustaches. Real men. Now, Jamel, I wanted to ask you, Jamel, have you seen this photo of Russell from this time period of making the movie in the L.A. King's locker room with Ronald Reagan. It's really. It's scary. But he's got, it confirms this is a real mustache because he's got this crazy giant mustache. And he's standing next to Ronald Reagan, Goldie Hawn, and a young. Wyatt. Let me look. I'll find that

photo. But he's, he looks like he's about to go on tour with Waylon Jennings. Yeah. Dude. Yeah. Yep. It's an incredible. It's a combo of the mustache with the hair that he's got going on. It's really fantastic. And also, wow, Wyatt Russell, a lot of

balls wearing that fucking Boston Bruins T-shirt into that L.A. King's locker room, kid. I'll tell you that right now. Got to have confidence. You got to believe it. And everyone, I think, the first he meets Bihann, who who is the Cricket Sheriff who's like, hey, since you're, you're an ex-law, man. And it's like, don't not doing it, buddy.

You know what I mean? Retired. Hey, do you hate the Chinese? Well, I hate the Chinese. Why don't we be brothers in the anti-Chinese League? That is that guy's selling point is like, join up with me. And I'll get you instant access to the anti-Chinese league we have going on. To be clear, the nonpartisan anti-Chinese league.

Oh, right. So we're not, you know, we're not, we're not Republicans or Democrats here. You know, we're not greenbacks or freestoylers. We are all united against the Chinese menace. Yeah, like Dana White of the UFC. He's not a political person. He just has some ideas. He's not political, FYI.

Is Dana White trying to get the Chinese out of the United States? No, but he's just a huge Trump supporter that keeps saying that he wasn't a political person. And he has a lot of ideas. He has quite a lot ideas that he likes to share with people. Okay, real quick about this photo. All right, I know it's Reagan. I know he's terrible. Yes.

But that sport code, it rules. It's a good one, man. It's not bad. I really like it. I would, I would wear that fit. I mean, be perfectly honest with you. Is Kurt Russell wearing a t-shirt that says, Will Fly for food?

Yes. Possibly. And I was about to say I would wear Kurt Russell's fit for sure. Yeah, I would get that. Hell, I'd take Goldies. That Reagan Blazer and come home to my wife like, Mommy. Mommy, I met Snake Pliskin today. Oh, we're going to up your dough, sweetheart. We've got to up your door.

President of what? Goldie Hawn doesn't look too thrilled to be taking that picture, by the way. I'm just going to put that up there. She has to be next to Rich. She has to touch Reagan. Ew. You think there's a little. She's looking like a snack, though.

Oh, yeah. Oh, my God. In 1993, Goldie Hawn, look out below. phenomenal. I do love the guy being, right? Because all I can think about was that great smithers line at the first part of Who shot Mr. Burns, where he's like, can't a guy walk down the street

without being offered a job? Because it happens to him like two or three times or like other people approach and he's like, uh-uh, don't want a job, retired now. Because you're a well-known murderer. We'd like you to be a murderer for our town, please. All out of the game, son.

very quickly Wyatt Earp is clock in the town and he realizes that there's one casino that isn't doing terribly well and it's not doing terribly well because big fat Billy Bob Thornton is just like ruining everything by being there which is great he's like their their dealer of the game Pharaoh which apparently existed he's like if you were to somehow get the comic book guy and like put him in the 19th century that that is Billy Bob in because he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's over like the rules basically yes which is amazing though because it's like you're the dealer at this like a saloons casino or whatever like your job is to be nice and friendly so people want to keep gambling like this is no way for a casino dealer to behave he's complaining about a dude smoking a cigar in his face which i do understand but i would be like yo dude this is the old west you've never brushed your teeth let's all just relax here okay totally soap has never touched your balls. What are you talking about? Steve, I gotta say when I was, every time people

entered a room in this movie, my first thought was like, damn, it smelled crazy in there. Yes, absolutely. Dude, there's the scene sort of later on down the road where it's after like one of the many Doc holiday like health scares in the movie and his fucking

Eastern European lady friend there like comes over and she like goes down on him and the whole time I was just like, lady don't. The fucking lady, the smell. I mean, alone. Come on. She's there to clean it.

Weren't many other jobs back then. It was cowboys. That fucking open a A fucking a building supply store. I'm trying to think of all the deadwoods. Barber is a good one. Doctors. Yeah.

But yes, he's so shit. Billy Bob Short Thornton is just such a shitty person. No one wants to be at this casino. It's kind of great. Yeah. uh so yeah he just intimidates the shit out of him he smacks him so hard this dude starts bleeding from the mouth which is awesome so great he calls billy bob a tub too oh no skin that smoke wagon and see what happens i love the incredible i'm slang here i love that oh man this is just like that's the thing why i think this movie works so well is because the humiliations are so significant all there's so many of them and they happen all There's so many of them

And all of them cut so deep Like all of them are just like Let it last too Like even Powers Booth Just saying well Bah That's the only time In a Western

That an actor has adopted The accent of a valley girl Like the old Well Bye It's so awesome To be fair He is wheeling his dead brother

Behind him Well, bye. Okay, but you know what? Regina George wouldn't back down from that, nor does he. And you gotta be like, well, hey, goodbye. Because he's about to show up and tell Billy Bob Thornton where to get off. We do see Doc Holiday murder Frank Stallone real quick before this happens. I love it.

Dude, he crawls on top of Frank Stallone like a cat and like stabs him in the stomach slowly. It's fucking weird. And this accent and like just the way that he, The dialogue just pours and like, why, George, if we're not friends anymore, I don't know if I could bear it. It's just the way that he like tears people that, again, the humiliations to Chris's point are very. That scene also introduced us to the slur of lunger. Like, everyone's calling him a longer because he's got lung problems. I think we need to bring that back, I guess, right?

Yeah. Yeah, but so what are you doing? Like making fun of someone with lung cancer? When Steve smokes a cigarette, you know? I was like, where do you plan to utilize this What you're saying is you'd like to call me a lunger. That's what you're trying to say. Yes.

And you'd be okay with people calling you lunger too? Or is that just... Well, if my lungs fail, put it in the book. Put it in my biography. Okay. My lunger, Eric Sisko. He also, when they like, so him and that lady friend sort of like

robbed this gambling parlor right here. And it is a great, he's like, good evening then. And it is, it's It's kind of like, I would not be surprised. I mean, if you could go back and ask him, which you can't because he's been dead for almost 20 years. But if you asked Heath Ledger, like, did you look at Doc Holliday's voice at all for the Joker? I feel like he might say, yes, just a little bit. It's in there.

Because there's something he did, it is supposedly like this historically accurate, like affluent southern accent or whatever. And I guess Doc Holliday was related to like super rich people and shit like that. But there is just something about that. twang that just sounds a little jokery a little bit. It's true and I like that they admit at the end that it's like yes and this is authentic I wanted to marry my first cousin and I couldn't

just like all the sons of the south. You can hear the south in there. You can hear the south in there. You can hear the VD in there. I mean it's just it's incredible voice. But yeah so Doc Holliday goes from there to help Wyatt Earp

humiliate Billy Bob Thornton because now Billy Bob is really pissed and he's got a shotgun and he's going to kill him and is just so terrified by the sight of Doc Holiday he won't do anything it's so awesome Wyatt I am rolling the Molly that I have is so

powerful you see take these guns away from me I am having a day of myself I could strangle this man I'm so high on Molly but the way that they're so terrified of them and so like and the guys themselves so easily like disarrow

these people. It has the vibe of like Old West John Wick like when the dude is shitting his pants and Doc Holliday is like, oh Johnny I apologize, I forgot you were still there. You can go now and the dude like runs away. Pretty funny. I hate to sound 97 years old, but like Wyatt Earp

was the Batman of his death. Like they made so many fucking movies about Wyatt Earp. And there's and a lot of them are really fucking good. And like I said my darling come time, but like Wichita. There's so many fucking good ones. A gunfight at the

okay corral is actually just okay. It's fine. You know, it's funny. I read that one of the reasons for that, why it was more Wyatt than Virgil ever was because White went out to Hollywood in the tens and started making friends with everyone and spun his own story. So he was kind of, you know, self-aggrandizing.

Well, yeah, and at the end, the thing at the end about Tom Mixed crying at the funeral. Like, yes. Right, right, right. That just speaks to that kind of thing. I mean, there is also a very good Frank Perry made a great Doc holiday movie with Stacey Keech called Doc, if anybody gets a chance. It's really worth your time. I just want to note that, that, Chris, you're saying that you don't want to sound like you're 97.

I did have this vision of you in the 1920s, 30s, grabbing some kids Batman comic book out of her hands and being like, back in my day, we had Wyatt Earp. Not this bat, not this bat man. Does he have a six shooter? does he know how to kick a mule what's funny in relation to that the woman who plays Maddie is the granddaughter of the founder

of DC Comics The rich get richer man Yeah that's weird That lady also Didn't need the paycheck I don't think But she was also on an episode of Seinfeld Where it's the The Doodle episode

Jerry refuses to use her toothbrush And she gets all Oh yeah Yeah she's that lady This is one of the most thank roles in cinema history is I am not only am I going to get broken up with by my husband for Dana Delaney I'm going to be a mean drug addict the

entire time yeah yeah not a lot to do here but sort of lay back and sort of like be mean to your husband yeah take shots of louddom yeah and that's it give me give me a three fingers of laudanum please be mean to the like the coolest guy in the world like in this movie's idea. Like, Maddie, I know this actress. She's the love interest in Fletch. Yeah, so Dana Wheeler Nicholson. Okay.

So speaking of Dana Delaney, by the way, so she shows up with Billy Zane, because this cast just keeps growing. And so Billy Zane credited as Mr. Fabian, and she is Josephine or Josie Marcus. And they are sort of this traveling arts troupe where they put on these shows for scumbag cowboys like they perform for later in this movie and so it's like a lot of uh we're doing soliloquies and monologues and singing and things of that nature she steps off this wagon she like beeline laser visions buys white herb and is immediately horny yeah she's like

immediate lady boner yes yes absolutely she's ready to take all her garters and all sorts of things acutramal that they had to wear back then ready to take it all off for this dude Kurt Russell is Phoebe Kates in Ridgemont High for her in this moment the way that he's just he's looking like a trawl drink of water my God

he is fantastic dude now I'm just picturing if I could Wyatt Earp standing on a diving board taking off all his cowboy clothes before he jumps up and it would be like coming coming out of the tank that he's do bump bomb bomp

do do I was just doing this song It is great because even like Billy Zane is there's a there's a weird like we saw spied you from across the way we like your vibe because like Billy Zane's like notice the rustic blah blah blah and the way that his eyes squit in the sun and then she's like I want one like she wants to ask this dude's dick right on fucking main street like absolutely joke and he's got Billy Zane's got some sort of great like it's not this but it's like well happy hunting or like like. Good luck. It is happy hunting. It's literally happy hunting. But yeah, I feel like with that duo, they may have both spied someone across the way, Steve. But later that night, if Billy Zane is in the room, he's just in the corner reading a magazine. I don't think this character would be participating.

Possibly not. Maybe if Dana was not in the room. You get that vibe from this character. It's not ever confirmed, of course. But I think the film actually heavily implies, implies it because I think it's what Jason freesley's character who like he gets like um who get when he when when the billy's and care baby and is killed jesus his character is like you know heartbroken and i think i think the strong implication is that like you know these are these are two you know most definitely

yeah yeah yeah yeah um yeah because he definitely like holds like jason preasley grabs his dead hand there at the end and that like that act alone is what makes him leave the gang he's like wait a second i'm just hanging around with a bunch of shitty murder and they murdered that guy, I think, is hot. When we see the performance, like, it's, the cowboys are kind of cool with it. Like, you know what I mean? Like, Jason Priestley, like, they're kind of grabbing his ass, joking around. Right.

They're pretty progressive to cowboys. Maybe the cowboys are the good guys here. I don't know. Curly explicitly is like, well, that's the prettiest man I've ever seen. Yes. And then it says he's going to drill the devil's ass, I think, before he knows it's Dana Delaney. Oh, yeah. He's performing fow.

Faust and I'd drill that old devil in the ass. I'm like, okay man, let's go for it. Let's do it. Billy Zane is doing a monologue from Henry V or something like that. Some dude at the

beginning is like juggling and they shoot at him. Which I guess is like like if you're doing a bad job at the Apollo theater like amateur night at the Apollo and they'd get the little sheep cane to pull you up. That's the Old West version of this I guess just shooting at the stage

until you leave and the next act comes on, apparently. Different kind of Sandman Sims, I assume. Also, yeah, we get Stephen Lang as Ike Clanton, Thomas Hayden Church is Billy Clanton. The cast goes on and on. I mean, Stephen Lang like disappears in this role

because he's covered in grime the entire time. I was like, it took me a while to realize it was him. I was like, wow. I've seen this movie a million times. I never do with Stephen Lang. Between this, him and Manhunter as like Freddie Louns, Like, he really does disappear into stuff, aside from, like, now he's always playing cable for some reason. But like, before Avatar, he would be like this character actor that would just be like kind of everywhere.

Yeah, yeah, he's really good in this movie. And it's so funny because literally like three days ago, I rewatched Avatar. And I had to be scrolling through the cast and I was like, oh, my God, Stephen Lang. Like, I was on the IMDB page for this movie and it's like, you know, six pages down. You get to Stephen Lang as listed. But yeah, and he's great. He's way puffier. in this movie. And if

Cosmetosis is to be believed, which I don't think anyone should ever believe a thing that dude ever said, but he fucking said that he was wasted the whole movie, Stephen, Stephen Lang. Method actor, that's great. I got to say, Thomas Hayden Church, it's weird seeing him

not craggily. Yeah. Yeah. Right. Like, he's like, so, y'all, he's very smooth-based. I'm just like, this isn't right, you know? It's like, what am I? It's like, what are my watching the first season of Ned and Stacey Wings at this point

Wings He has to ripen a little longer in the aging chamber and they can come back out It is yeah One of those actors Like yeah He was like kind of handsome

But also Frankenstein-esque So like he needed to weather To become like Side and Church Like oh that's a handsome older man Kind of a deal I think you're totally right It didn't help

That like half of his lines on wings Started with him going Oh That added to the Frankenstein-esque vibe, I feel. Hey, gang, today's episode is brought to you by Sonos. Now, this holiday season, y'all, Sonos is going to make an amazing gift.

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Shop now through December 1st, 2025 at sonos.com. So, oh, great line when they're leaving the performance that night or whatever. It's like, oh, you know, let's go back to the bar and have a drink. Let's go play cards. What are you doing? And Sam Elliott as Virgil Earp is like, no, I think I'm going to go home with the misses. And she's like, I want to go spend the night with my man.

And he turns out this is an amazing line. And he goes, you know, her maiden name was Sullivan, as in these Irish can't stop fucking. Oh, man, that's funny. I didn't get that at all. You did it. You know, her maiden name was Sullivan, right? They just, they're like them Jack Rabbits. They just can't stop fucking the Irish.

I picked that up. This was the time for vicious anti-Irish bigotry. Oh, absolutely. I can say it. I'm married to one. It's fine. my big old pecker is just tired out because of these irish i'll tell you what i do love and again because mattie is such an irredeemable piece of shit in this movie kurt russell is like hey maybe we could

fuck no just go out it's just like she is it's a very unfortunate performance not the performance the role it's like it's like it's like from a it's like from an anti-drug PSA it's like well are you opium no but also Kerr Russell's got to go operate his pharaoh table he's now just a dealer for this because so that's okay thank you

so this was a thing that I was like there's there's a line of dialogue or two missing from the edit here because he's like all right I got to go to work and I'm like okay you know that he struck a deal with the guy who runs the room because he says something about oh 25% of the gambling meetings or whatever

but I didn't think he's fucking dealing at the table and then there he is he's actually working like fucking Homer Simpson at Mr. Burns Casino. We should have slow role that got him like an orientation day we said like where does my name plaque go on this table? I don't think you need any of that shit because this guy is already

he's like Ace Rothstein he immediately is running the entire fucking place. But that's what I'm saying Chris is a dealer but the dealer is such a low you know a low on the ladder kind of a deal I thought like when he sinks that deal with that dude

I thought it was to like manage this establishment, not work a single gambling thing. Right, or protection or something. Right, yeah, yeah, but eventually he's going to get there. I mean, this guy, he waits patiently, he's doing this job. A big fucking whale walks in the room and puts down like not only his life, but several other people's lives and all these,

when he gets a mining concern and he gets all those lots, and I'm like, this guy is running several businesses now because he fucking got this guy. you know that is some insane gambling you're doing if you're putting like your mining operation on the line along with like two other operations because he's holding like three deeds by the end of the night and he's like boys we're in business i guess we're miners now starting next year you can put the deed to your house on fan duel and those fun apps oh nice that's awesome got a pre-sign though i think you have to make sure that you're you probably have to get a lawyer to do like to hold the other before you do it but whatever ever you know i gotta say it has been amazing over the last few weeks watching uh any kind of basketball related sports coverage that does not realize the fucking irony of them doing these gambling reads oh yeah oh my god it is so great just watching them like co from the story to be like all right we'll be back in a few minutes talking about this case of crooked mafia gambling uh but

also fan duel but I think that's sort of what Wyatt Earp is doing at the Farrow table he's kind of like the Chauncey Billips of the situation oh yeah oh look you could go gamble with Wyatt Earp exactly like it's a big celebrity that you could come in I wouldn't want a fan duel

with him he's pretty good yeah oh that's like cowboy fantasy camp dude is like you go there and it's like you get to duel with Wyatt Earp himself all right oh you could die he'll shoot you dead there's got to be something like that right there's got to be a thing

that exists right now no we're like no no no no no no we're like fucking loser dudes can go like live like a cowboy or whatever and you're like shooting blanks and whatever stuff yeah like a lamer west world now it's the time where we fuck each other I didn't sign up for this

no women on the rain buddy. Dana White makes a scene at Cowboy Fantasy King. I like this like just the night at the bar and you see him after he get the deeds or whatever. There's definitely a moment where he just gets a cup of coffee

at the bar and it's his place now kind of. I was like, this is a Sam Malone move. Give me that ceramic cup of coffee while everyone's getting wasted around me. Oh yeah. There's a moment later where he's just like, you know, it's like after hours and he goes and fills his beer up again from the other side of the count

I thought it was pretty cool. Dude, that's what you want, man. Like, the dream of owning your own place so you can go behind the bar and just fill her up on your own, absolutely. Nobody filled it on the customer side. I thought that was a pretty sharp move. Why waste

from around the... Oh, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I think this is when, like, the Cowboys start roughing into his stuff, like Powers Booth is kind of wasted, right? Him and Ringo, yeah. Him and Ringo come in. This is like, and, you know, Doc is wasted. this is a great, like, they're going back and forth.

One of my favorite reaction shots of this movie is when Val Kilmer and Michael Bean start talking Latin to one another and Bill Paxson, who doesn't have a ton to do in this movie, just has this like, who, hey? It's just like, it might as well be a dog starting to talk. He's like, what? Hey, Doc, did you just do, like, magic to him or something? That's what kind of dog language?

Demon language. he also refers to johnny wringo as the deadliest pistollier since wild bill they say and then the whole should i hate him i think i hate him oh he's an educated man now i really hate him because he speaks latin oh right yeah yeah yeah and then dude doc holiday just totally embarrasses him right here because bean does all the like flipping my pistol around shit and then doc holiday just doing it with his little booze cup oh man it to diffuse the situation, it just sort of happens. Powers Booth wins $500 at Pharaoh, and I'm like, aren't you a trillionaire?

Like, do you have more money than anyone in the world? If it's $500 at 1880, God knows what? Right. I don't think we started calculating. No, 1897, the end of the Civil War and the explosion. No, not again. Not again. Sorry.

I don't think that we'd started calculating inflation yet, so I don't know how you'd figure that out. but you're right, I think it's just $50 billion dollars it turns into it. The problem is that you're not really, I don't think he's actually spending it like thinking about what kind of amount he is. He's mostly going in, Power Spitzpillar is mostly just going into places

and throwing the wad of bills he has in the air. Yeah. Drinks are on me. And like, that's how you went over a town, dude. We'll just, we'll do that, but that was 500. That was a trillion dollars you just threw at them for what, what's going to end up being maybe what, like 400 drinks?

maybe. Big maybe, dude. That's a lot of beers. I think there's like 20 people in this town. Yeah, I don't know even that. But still, trillion dollars, steep price. So, yeah, obviously they're, they're against one another at this point.

Sure, yeah, yeah. Here's a scene that could be cut when Kurt Russell goes horse riding with Dana Delaney here. Like, this part of the movie interests me the least, like whether or not Wyatt will cheat on his wife. Our horses are so horny.

it's not us you know let's ride it out it's one of those things where you can tell like in some version of the script this was like a bigger part of the film and to my mind they should have realized in the edit what this movie was which is sort of like yeah it's like a bunch of dudes shooting guns

that's it yep yeah there's the movie that's all anyone's buying the ticket for honestly it is more like modern it's like more modern action in that like it is it is literally like a western for the time because it is a lot of gun porn like the way they show the peacemaker at the end when he fucking finally takes it out oh my i was like oh man oh yeah you might as well be shown his dick at this month you might as well be taken out big russell right there his dick is a gift from the citizens of dodge city in this movie like you know you get you get two yet two representations of dicks the guns and the mustaches and that's absolutely that's that's pretty much it if the scene with the if like there'd been a shootout between the horses

then it would have been perfect but you know sometimes a mustache is just a mustache uh huh yeah like they just kind of go off and like she just one of her big thing is like oh I want to spend the rest of my life doing room service and then like it's kind of great

because Russell like kind of gets a boner from her and goes back to his drug piece of shit wife and then he's like so what if what if we got out of here and just you know, I ordered rooms. There's like, room service, the fuck you're talking about? Yep, yep. Can I get morphine from room service?

Do they got morphine there? It is that classic thing that you see in movies and TV all the time where the character, like, has a great time with someone who's not their spouse and then tries to, like, recreate that spark with the spouse later and it blows up in their face. Oh, God. It's pretty fun. What are you talking about? We'll never live like that.

I mean, this movie is kind of like Reefer Madness with this opium stuff Because I think that's seen after this Is Powers Booth in the Opium Dan He takes a hit, boy, I feel great, I feel just capital And you just start shooting people randomly Oh my God, it's awesome

Heroin notorious for making you want to shoot people Yeah, exactly, not sleep. You definitely want to walk. That's what you want to do after you take heroin is walk around, sure. Okay. He tries to shoot the moon down. Which is not a bad idea for the time.

I think you would do that if you were high on opium. That checks out. Sure. From a chair, though. From a chair. You're not getting up. I'm going to get your cheese, you bastard. He saw a bad guy with a gun on the moon and he wanted to stop him as a good guy with the moon.

Good guy with a gun. on Earth. No, I think you had it right. Only, only a good moon with a, only a good moon with the moon can stop a bad moon with the moon. That's true. I heard that. That's, what, the eclipse or something? Hey, get away from there. I'm the only one that could bring down a moon. Get out of there. Oh, he did say lasso down the moon, right? That's right. Just like a cowboy.

God damn it. There is a great, uh, when he's fighting off the gun and somebody's like somebody's got to do something and then somebody I think it's um is it Beel interns or a be interns around here and he's like I believe you're the sheriff. Yes. Yes. Well the sheriff's like no not me. This is a town matter. Marshall which is the 70 year old man. So he has to go out of hard reason. Harry Carey Jr. is this

old time right. This is one of my favorite deaths in the movie because he does get the drop on drugged Paris booth. He's like just got to take The gun, like, he's not even, I'm not even going to arrest you. Just like, you got to give me your guns. And he's like, I was just fun and Fred. And he's got the guns upside down. And he shoots this dude in the heart upside down. It rules so hard.

It's awesome, dude. And, you know, frankly, this old man should have seen it coming. Come on. How long have you been in business? You know that these cowboys are out of control. You can't just talk to this guy. This guy doesn't give a shit about you. No, you're dead.

It's curly. It's the most notorious. of the bunch. I'm sorry. The guy's got the red sash. He's got a shirt made of red satch for crying out loud. Wyatt comes up at this point and just knocks him out totally cold and then all these dudes draw guns on him. And I think doesn't he put, does he put his gun to Thomas Hayden Church's head? And he's like, you better back off before I turn your head into a canoe.

The canoe is. No, he does it to Ike. Oh, Stephen Langues. This is the Doc Holiday line where, because him and Thomas Hayden Church were getting into it at the bar a little bit. He's like, you're that drunk piano player. You're probably seeing double, which is, I do got

one, I got two guns, one for each of them. Such an awesome retort to that. Oh yeah, because he's Kilmer, Doc Holliday was playing like Chopin or something like that and they had some, you know, like he was playing piano, you see, and Thomas Hayden Church wanted him to play piano.

That's a difference, yeah. And that was a little bit of a difference there because he's like, and you, music lover, you're next. He says to Thomas A. Church. Why don't you stop playing that, stop playing that gay Chopin stuff and

play big baby bump or whatever the big song is of the time? Yeah, what would have been, what would have been like the insufferable, play this song of the 1870s? Oh, uh, play some salieri. Yeah.

Dude, it'd be awesome if Thomas Aton was just screaming for some salieri in the saloon. Play the damn birthday song. Walk my horse, the biggest hit of the nation. I mean, you know, actually as I'm picky, but it would have been like a minstrel

tune, you know? Yeah. Right. Yeah, probably. I love this scene because Russell has his gun to Stephen Lang's head and he's like, you know, you guys can rush me but I'll put a bullet straight in your head. And the other guy's like, rush him and Stephen Lang's like, I think

he means it. He's like, uh, maybe don't do that. I don't want my head turned into a canoe as it turns out. And it's just that's what I love about this movie. Not only because I think that that's very important. It's in the Billy Bob scene and I think Stephen

Lang gets it too. Like it's almost like old wrestling the way that these like dudes eat shit by Kurt Russell and elevating him as being cowards or losers or whatever. And like Stephen Lang plays such a cowardly like dude that like

keeps running away and it just makes Russell look bigger you know what I mean like a wrestler just taking a move from a guy oh he's a Stephen Lang's a total jobber in this movie exactly he's just selling it for him the way that he keeps on talking

I mean there's actually I mean several characters say it they're like oh don't listen to he's just talking like yeah that's like exactly like they're just like building each other up and talking all this trash to one another nonstop And, like, fucking Ike, the Stephen Lane's character, talks trash so much. They actually follow up with him at the end.

Yes. All the Earps and Ike. It's up and really? I don't care about it. I think that Ike makes the end what happened to everybody because the way that the movie leaves it, you don't see what happens to him because, like, he throws down his gang colors while they're chasing him on the horse. And he's like, I quit. I'm not the gang anymore.

off and then you don't see them do anything to him. But that's like at the end of the rock like if more people survive, I wouldn't like Ed Harris is dead. David Morris is dead. Like I don't care what happened to Bocheme Woodbine. Like I don't care like whatever his thing was. It doesn't

matter to me. Like it's whatever but it was funny to me. First of all I care about what happens to Bocheme Woodbine in any movie because that dude fucking rock's ass. He's very good in it. So to because there's no law and order, even though the what do you call it there the the irp boys are making a killing uh wouldn't you know it both

virgil and morgan sign up for the law and it pisses wyatt this is right this like uh wyatt's not irp they're all erp uh Wyatt is off good to seeing uh john's uh judge spencer uh and the judge says you can't have a murder without a witness because he came outside the saloon after this guy was shot so yeah case is dismissed he gets back to town virgil's hanging up all these gun control signs. Right. And you see what Virgil's inspiration is, right? Because he walks out one afternoon and a bunch of the cowboys

ride down the street firing wildly and they almost run over a boy in the street and like don't even give a shit. Don't even try to like get out of the way. Virgil saves him and like as he gives him back to the mother, you can see Sam Elliott like, sheesh, I think this town does here need some strong law in order. Do you think that there was like a must mustache round robin like basically like Kurt Russell's like you know what all the mustache is gonna be real I'm gonna call Val and Val called you know what I mean Val called Stephen Lang and like

you know everybody called everybody and then they're like should we call Sam Elliott like in that one in jumping dash flash I don't think he has a mustache I don't like should we bother him like uh or no I think you're thinking of uh does is he's mustacheless and fatal beauty okay that's what it is thinking of the wrong whoopie movie, yeah. Previous episode, I think. I think he is hairless in that, yeah. Do we want, I don't want to bother you at home, Sam, but for the movie, if you could keep

them, of course I'll keep my mercy. Yeah, I'll bring my left leg too. Like, I don't know. What else I'm going to bring on shit? No, no, I just did that as a favorite of whoopee. Whoopee. I just, I had, you know, we had a very, we had a French. Me and whoopee, we love each other.

It is kind of amazing that Sam Elliott, the most mustached man in the world is, you know. It's the only time Sam Elliott's been in a movie where his mustache has stiff competition. It does. It blends in. I don't know. Like,

Labowski, ain't nobody got nothing on that. You know, but like in this movie where like almost every character in the film has a mustache, he must have been looking like, oh, man, hope nobody's got a cooler mustache than me on the set of this here picture. No, no problem.

Don't worry about that. But, yeah, why it's all pissed off that they have joined the law. And, you know, he's like, same alley, he's like, these peer people are afraid to walk the streets. And so we have to come out of retirement, all three of us, you see. This is why you don't move in with family, because then all of a sudden, all the shit starts coming up. And you're just like, man, I didn't sign on for any of this.

Yeah. You all have to turn each other's keys at the same time. It's really annoying. I came here to retire in Arizona. at least a hundred years before other Americans started doing that on the reg, okay? I just want a quiet life now, but now they pull them back in. Waiting for my wife to die of a laudanum overdose and just have a nice life for the rest of, you know, left of my days.

Virgil, I'm 33 years old. I need to enjoy the last years of my life. I mean, that's the funny thing about this is all these guys in real life were about like 30 something years old. Sam Elliott is like what 50 in this movie I think the if the trivia is to be believed the guy who Harry Carey Jr. plays

who Harry Kerry Jr. is like 75 in this movie was like in his early 30s like the actual historical which is no one saw 70 in the in the 1880s but that's adjusting for adjusting his age for inflation

at 31 he would be about 72. right uh we get one of the one of the scenes here we are first uh made a little more uh officially hip to what doc holidays uh health conditions are like um bill paxton says that holiday has been in their bar playing cards for 36 hours straight uh and there's a great uh dal kilver going to i've not yet begun to defile myself he's also wasted right he's totally wasted but you i mean the makeup job that they do on Kilmer in this movie is awesome. Like,

phenomenal. He looks like he's a ghost the entire time, you know. Like a vampire bit him, yeah. Yes, yeah, exactly. And this is a great, he's playing cards with Stephen. Like, that's what is so fascinating about the,

like the ecosystem of this town. Like, all these dudes fucking hate each other and whatever else. But they will get together to gamble. They will still play cards together because in that moment, you could still kill someone. You know,

fingers crossed, you can still kill someone. What else is there to do? There's like, what, 50 books, maybe tops? I don't think we, did we get to 50 yet? Maybe, I think maybe 50.

If you take the ones that got imported as well, you know, the whole bunch of them. I think there's 50 books. About 50 at the time. So then it's that and gambling essentially. Sure. Yeah. Have fun. Stephen Lang as like here, he gets pissed off

because Holiday has won 12 hands in a row and nobody's that lucky. And like, yeah, Accusing someone of cheating at a card game in the Old West is like death penalty kind of like if you were wrong, you are getting the death penalty. But also Doc Holliday loves to fucking cheat and his death and probably was. But like, who cares? It's Doc Holliday and he got away with it and you're, you know, you're you're folding. Like when you start talking like, I'm going to shoot you. I don't know what I'm going to do.

Like you've already lost. You've done it already. Maybe poker's just not your game. I know let's have a spelling. Oh, dude, that is an awesome quip Stephen Lang gets really raw and he's got these weird lines to like Virgil there, Sam Elliott, about like how cut his

pimp heart out. Yeah. Oh, right, yeah. They accuse the brothers of being like the pimps of the town because now they're just going around like making money and telling people what to do and whatever. Which is probably close to correct. I'll cut your pimp heart out. That actually sounds kind of cool. That dude has a pimp heart. That sounds like the title of a movie that came out in 1977. Yeah.

Pimp heart. Pimp heart is like black braveheart from 1970. Oh my God. Black exploitation, Braveheart would be fantastic. I would 100% watch that. Absolutely. But I'm also just picturing like a heart with like sunglasses and a big. Oh, I see.

That also works. also works, yeah. You know. Also, the very weird, you know, I don't know if this is an anachronism or not. Weird that Pimp was around then? I mean, I don't know how long the word Pimp has been in rotation. Yeah, probably, right? I mean, they were brothels and whatnot.

Yeah, yeah. Constitians, the oldest profession. There must have probably been PIMPs. Well, pimps probably the second oldest profession. Yeah, yeah, yeah. There you go. Well, third, the second will be John. I guess. Somebody needs...

Yeah, sure. Oh, a professional job? Pims, people who observe the Pimpin ain't easy is the fourth job. Sure is fun. But yeah, Sam Elliott arrests Ike here

because he's wasted and he's like, if I see him in town, I'm going to kill him, he's got a shotgun or whatever, and he just knocks him out. It's like, you're now arrested because you were, you know, drunken disorderly. And this is when why it's like, dude, you are just making this thing into a...

You are going to make... We're going to have the most famous gunfight in five minutes because you're being an asshole right now. Which is weird because, like, when the shit hits the fan in this movie, somehow the entire family turns it on Wyatt Earp. And I was like, but he's the Earp that just wanted to stay retired. You motherfuckers dug up the Baba Yaga, not him.

But Virgil has some like, well, you brought us here. Yeah, exactly. There you go. It's your fault. What you expect us to do, we're going to kill people. I think it's because they assume If Wyatt had just been a man And taken the fucking job from the first place And killed all these people

In the time sense Like we wouldn't have to deal with this You would have already killed I just took the badge And then what decided to indiscriminately slaughtered them We wouldn't be in this position But yes it looks like They let I go And then like his gang is basically

they're talking shit to Doc Holiday right here like everybody who's the little weiner that goes up right here and Kurt Russell like he draws his gun on Kurt Russell and Kurt Russell pulls it out of his hand

and hits him in the head with it Oh that's pretty great He's just one of the other guys One of these dudes You got a fight coming to you They basically leave it with Yeah it's like this ain't over Kind of a deal or whatever

And then meanwhile we have the doctor sort of diagnosing Doc Holiday saying he's got to rest it up you know stop the booze stop the gambling, stop staying out all night, and curb his marital tendencies, I think is the way the doctor

puts it. And I also like the line that he's got two days or two years were in between the nose. Is he a veterinarian? Jesus Christ, it's something he said about my cat. Like, I don't know, maybe tomorrow or maybe in 15 years. I don't know. You tell me. But I would wager a vet

today would be more talented than an Old West doctor. Probably. Yeah, yeah. I'd gather. that but i mean it's just it's just more proof that even you know in the old west american health care was fucking terrible dude there is the great thing though where he's like

when he says to him like you have to curb your marital tendencies that's the point where he goes get out of my side he just kicks the doctor and then she comes in his uh joanna peculiar i think her name is uh playing kate his girlfriend or whatever his partner

puts a cigarette in his mouth and just starts he's like you might just be the antichrist holy shit Oh, it's so good, yeah. We must redefine the nature of our association. And then this is where she's pulling his pants down. Yes, and that smelly dick comes out, dude. Oh, man, yeah.

Yikes. But so they see the problem is growing. This is a great Sam Elliott when he watches the Cowboys riding it down. He's like, see, you moron, now they're six of them. They're growing like rabbits now. And this is why it has his line, guess you better swear me in. like here we go dude

time to defend the law I guess okay fine I'll kill all the cowboys fine all right I'll do it Jesus we get to the okay corral here probably one of the bigger remembered scenes in the movie

question about the shot of the boys walking over to the okay corral why is that barn on fire aside from just looking totally badass maybe maybe they said it on fire because of that. Listen, we got to look cool as hell. It's important for us to look like we are the coolest motherfuckers on the planet.

So someone set a barred on fire. I like that reasoning. I also like the idea because the shitty sheriff that we met at the very beginning, the one who's crooked, he's also the head of the fire department. Oh, right. I like that he's just like, I have to, I went to cowboys. I mean, I kind of have to be there. Sorry.

The fire's got to go. Fire's got to keep going. They get there. Ike is doing this old west thing that I almost want to bring back, but I know it would be disgusting. But like, just having a big bucket in the street you can dunk your head in. It just seems so relaxing. You can't get street buckets to dunk your head in. No.

Jamel are you pro or anti-bucket in the street? You know, when Eric says street bucket, it makes it sound like it's full of cum, so I'm anti-com. Yep. It's going to be full of something you don't want to put your head in. Oh, exactly. Come, cigarette butts, you know, a sandwich wrapper. Everything together is called a street goulash. Oh, I love that.

Mix it up. I would say, Steve, you'd have to bring your own bucket and then take it home with you. You could boot on the street. That's sort of a performance art thing you're doing. Well, you know, we kind of have it now. It's trendy with people who have, like, back porches and, you know, property to put things on. But those ice plunge tubs, that's kind of just, because what he's doing there is trying to, like, shake off a hangover, like he's dunking his head in the barrel or whatever. So it's kind of that. You just wouldn't get in it all the way, Steve. So you could buy one and then you just use it for your face only.

I guess you'd be like, hey, I got next. I guess that's kind of gross. Like, you know, like your buddy dunks. And then you're like, can I get dunked? Remember, you can't just refresh that water that easily. That water, that street bucket, we're all drinking tonight, probably. Also, yeah, you're going to need the bucket the morning. You want a house bucket, Steve. You don't want, that's when you're going to need it the most is when you wake up the next morning. So get yourself a house bucket and it won't be disgusting and full of, I guess, come as Eric is telling us. I don't know. I did not suggest that.

Get yourself a house bucket, by the way. A house bucket. It's easy enough. Got a bucket for the house. Got a bucket for the car. Yeah. Oh my God. Yes.

The shootout starts. It's so good. I love Virgil here, though. This is great. Sam Elliott fucking rifle drawn. He's like, this is not what I want. Don't make me do this. Classic old text. I'm going to kill you, but I'm so not into it. Pay no attention to my boner.

Yeah, I can say. I am not hard as a rock right now. I am really sad about doing the thing I've done my entire life. I have created every circumstance that has led us to this, but I am so sorry that this is where we are, man. So sorry. Thoughts and prayers and whatnot. Dude,

Thomas Hayton Church getting lit the fuck up right here is really good. I texted Steve about this. I was like, it was like 10.30 in the morning and I watched this. I'm like, holy shit. This is the great. He gets shot once and then Doc Holliday just sort of like unloads.

And it's like, Because he's doing the cool, like, hitting the hammer of the pistol so he can rapid fire it. God damn it's cool. It's sunny Corleone-esque the way he gets fucking. It is because I think it's Doc Holiday. And I think Morgan Paxton's character, I think, is getting in on it too. So he's really kind of getting it because, like, that's what you, that's what you want to see when the shoulders have to go back and forth because there's multiple points of attack happening at once. Oh, yeah.

And even this. Even this. Another just incredible humiliation. To be shot down like a dog with two by two people, Thomas Ayn Church. Disgusting, pathetic. Pretty awesome.

Ike runs away like a coward. There's a great Kurt Russell thing because like, Ike starts begging for his life. And then Kurt Russell's like, I joined the fighter. Get the fuck out of the way or something. He's just like, the mustache is talking there.

It's great. This is the mustache talking now. Oh, yeah. I mean, if you, if you watch the DVD, they have the extras where the mustaches gather together and discuss the performances. Oh, yeah, dude, the mustachement, Terry? Oh, you didn't get a broom every day? Oh, I got a nice, I got a nice combing every day. Oh, yeah.

Oh, yeah. Kurt's got a guy for that. He treats me real nice. His name's Isaac. That was a bristly commentary trail. Oh, nice. Oh, look at that. Great Doc Holiday line, because the other, I think, uh, we.

Which dude is this now? There's so many fucking dudes. Whatever dude is surviving right here, the guy that gets shot in the head where he's like... I think that's John Burke. I think that's... This is Robert John Burke where he's like... Yeah. He's got the gun on Val Kilmer and he's like, I got you or whatever. And he's like, you're a daisy if you do. It's fucking awesome. And then Paxson just shoots him in the head. Pretty great.

But yeah, now we're upset about... Because Ike and Thomas Hayden Churchwork Brothers, so that's a big deal. deal you know what I mean I do love the old West funeral we get to see here that I'm all done up it's pretty dope oh dude yeah where they've got like mime makeup on for some reason

like these are some rosy ass cheeks this guy's got like it's Thomas Hayden Church is the first one you see and yeah it's like this weird like the glass top coffin and he's just got like all like he looks like like fucking let them eat cake like French Revolutionary times

like it's just this white cake all over his face and then just like these red it's like he's in like the fucking like a nutcracker production or something it's very weird looking I like it I like the little gloves on and everything it's wonderful dude but this is so funny because it's like

fafo motherfucker you fucked around and found out and these these fucking cowboy babies are going through the street through funeral with the big sign oh we were murdered on the streets of tombstone well why do you think that happened come on with that sign. It's just so funny to be such a badass gang

and then suddenly have this demonstration. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. That never happens. People acting like this all of a sudden playing victim. Boy, that never happens. You know what? It's too realistic. It took me out of the movie.

I was thinking of modern times. Yeah, it was like, fuck, how did the news turn on? What is happening here? And I think at this point, basically, like, there's going to be a night where everyone's going to get retribution and I think another deleted scene

I think at this point Wyatt and Dana Dana are at least fucking a little bit because like someone goes up to Dana Delaney like oh your boyfriend's in trouble and she has to like go all the way to Maddie's house and be like I think everyone's I know I'm the last person you want to see him

like they don't know each other you know what I mean you're totally right I think also I mean deleted scenes of plenty I think like Priestley must have been a way bigger character because around here like the Earp boys are just sort of like walking down the street and they see Priestley and I was like oh cool here's where like

there might be some more Jason Priestley scenes and he's literally like yeah you guys don't talk to me you killed my friends I'm out of here and he just like runs away I was like that is the most Brandon Wall shit this character could have done in this movie it is I mean I watched the trailer and like Jason

Priestley gets such prime real estate they were trying to get I just would love to watch like the 13 year old girl that watched this movie and it was like you've got to be fucking kidding me He's barely in it. Yeah, this is a dad for noon. But he was so good.

When he touched Billy Zane's hand, it was electric. But yeah, they try, the cowboys send people over to kill the women, but that doesn't really work out. And like, this is when I believe Bill Pat. That's right. Sam Elliott gets shot here and walks in to the bar, like a bleeding, which is kind of,

nobody notices, which is kind of great. Yeah, this scene, think has some of the best, like this whole sequence has some of the best, like, mood that the movie is able to create because this is where, like, I mean, it's maybe a little on the nose, but I think it's very effective. Like, a storm is literally rolling in, you know, the really great, like, a lot of it was apparently like some real lightning that they were able to film and everything like that. And it's just this weird, like, they know it's going to be a weird night. Like, Sam Elliott, I think the sequence starts with him being like,

gonna be one of those nights or something like that. And it's like, uh, Wyatt and Morgan are just, like, eating Chinese food. All of a sudden, this dog is here. Never saw this dog before this scene. Great dog, yeah. He's awesome. This old, like, beagle or whatever. It's the West dogs wander in, wander out.

It's not really locking doors. But this dog looks like he's dealing at the Farrow table now. I don't know. It might be. I thought they deal poker. Oh, yes. Usually, yeah. Yeah, I'll work at your casino.

I can only deal poker, though. I mean, I think this scene and the scene when Paxton is they're trying to save his life a little bit later. It works because I mean the core, the relationships that work best is the Earp brothers. Like they really did work on those relationships and made it so that those matters

so that when Paxton and Elliot and fucking Russell get together it feels really immense. Like there is this really big powerful feeling from it all that you don't get from as much from like Ringo and Curley. I wish. Jesus. This is kind of like a great sort of cementing

of the, I mean not that it really wasn't before I guess but like of what the brother like structure is because when Sam Elliott walks back into the bar he's like the older brother calling for help for the middle guy you know why and then he just like falls over yeah but first it's like Virgil what did you forget and then they notice he's bleeding yes yeah exactly you know which is that's always the worst like when something bad has happened and you haven't been made hip to it yet and then you make like a sort of related quip and then it's like well you know the reason that happened was and you're like oh wish i didn't make that quip after all yeah that'll happen

by this time we had that scene with johnny ring johnny wringo got drunk at the funeral for these guys the demonstration there there's that threat of violence and we get the i'm your huckleberry that's just my game play for blood which will yeah coming soon you get to do it like i want your blood i want your souls which is pretty cool for michael bean here Michael Bean is fantastic in this movie. We need this dude playing I think after Terminator it was like and also aliens

I'm playing this like romantic hero guy kind of a deal yeah military definitely but like in this movie I was like oh no he's actually really good almost I would maybe argue better at playing like a sinister villain kind of character

he's terrifying in this movie it's great malevolence is really really suits him and I think he I kind of wish we got more of him and understood him more like I I like that I like I like that he's just the guy who's drunk and says I want to take your soul that's also cool

but I I did I found myself especially since I found Curley's death so anti-climactic I was like I was like I kind of wanted Ringo to matter more when the showdown happens and I'm like he's cool and he's got the attitude and everything but I don't know who this guy is at all

I don't you're right he's also clearly smarter than Hurley, right? Yeah. So it's like why there's too much of a good thing in this movie. I mean, Power's Booth is great. I wouldn't want to get rid of him.

I wouldn't want to get rid of Michael Bean, but you could have made that the same character if you... I'm sure if you were to take all the footage on the cutting room floor, there's a version of the Ringo character who is much more what I think he seems like, which is almost like an actual malevolent force

that almost doesn't belong right sort of like he's sort of he's he's too smart he's too evil right right you know Curley Curley's just sort of a jackass who like likes a kill but like he's not he's not you know he's he's just there to plunder

but like Ringo actually seems like oh this is this isn't evil force like there's my favorite line in the film is when towards the end when Kurt Russell was trying to he's speaking with Valcomer who's bed red and he's like, why, why is Ringo like this?

And Doc Holliday says he wants to get revenge and, and writer was like, for what? For being born? Which is just like, it's a genuinely disturbing idea. Like, for real is like a disturbing idea that someone is so angry at existence that they just want to kill and destroy until they can't anymore. And like, there's a version of this movie where, where they, were they, where they really? really emphasize that for Ringo that this is like you know this is a blackhearted maniac yeah you know it's funny because I in my notes I wrote down that I related to this line which is probably not a good thing I thought I thought of you I didn't ask to be born okay yeah I don't I don't

like it but I think Jamel to your point there's definitely some alternate universe where like in this movie you have all of these cutaways back to the cowboy gang and you you see them like doing some some dastardly stuff and you're like oh yeah that guy is a true vessel for evil and it sort of fits more in the movie but as the movie is the amount of violence that you see just appears to be regular old old west violence and not like maniac shit but this guy this character can get up to some maniac shit and uh sam elliott is uh struggling with the the bullet in his arm he's going to lose the whatever the use of his arm uh his wife wife is not happy about it.

Morgan can't handle it. Your finger and arm! No! Oh, no! You can go the other way with that stuff, God. I'm going to have to learn. I'm going to have to learn. You're talking about playing guitar, right? Sure. I'm sorry, but his mustache won't survive.

You got, no, kill me. Kill me. Kill me. Take me out to the outside bucket and drown me in it right now. The must just on his face Oh, they have to amputate it Oh, dude, it's just screaming As it gets like shaved off

Oh no, we're going to have to send you to The Barber No It's like the shoe in the dip Yeah, no Not to interrupt I recently rewatch that movie Which a movie I love

And the shoe going into the dip Is genuinely one of the most disturbing movie murders I've ever seen in my life. Yeah. That shoe is begging for his life. Yes. And I would argue here's what makes it creepier too is the way that it's drawn. So like the way that it looks and it's

like squeaky noises it's making. That's like it's like you're watching a little child to be melted. Yes. It's not like here's Mr. Shoe with Mrs. Shoe and baby shoes. It just appears to be like oh it's like a little kid or like a like a puppy kind of You know, you're dunking this innocent thing. Oh, it's horrifying.

Well, the weird thing about that shoe, I don't think it knew what death was that morning. But it certainly is aware of it right now. Oh, yeah. And pain? Do you think a new pain was? Where's the deleted scene in Roger Rabbit where they inform that shoes, the other half of the pair of shoes would happen? And then that dude's like, that just dip me. Dit me also.

What am I going to do? I'm just one shoe now. Dit me. sad story but yeah so this is when Bill Pax's shot in the back here too

God this guy's just trying to play pool in the middle of the night and he just gets fucking popped through a window yeah very cowardly here it's a very sad emotional scene because like they can't operate on him in the pool hall

and Kurt Russell the dog is barking and he just gets dad mad at it he's like get that dog out of here you know what I'm somebody get that goddamn dog out of here which I think I've heard my father scream at least a half

dozen times. So I know I know as a person here with children I have said get that dog out of here before. He's going to the mouth. And the other thing I thought of is a Chappelle show skit you know back when Chappelle was in the chud

when it's sort of like what if the white executive got treated like a drug dealer and a cop burst into his apartment and scream, shut that fucking dog up. and then shoots a golden retriever. That's what's in my head.

Oh, God. That show, you know, that guy really used to be something. Sure did. Block party. Phenomenal movie. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.

Great movie. Oh, my God. He gets, this is a scene that doesn't work so great. Like, he's covered in his brother's blood and he goes in the rain. And, like, I can see the drama,

but like, dated Delaney's like, what? He's like, get away from me. everybody's a little much maybe i dug on it man because i love this moment of like both both avenues of his life uh uh a fall apart right here right his strung out wife is just like i don't want anything to do with this because you were looking at the other woman on the other side of the street who he also like shoes away so it's like established life not right now possible future life also not right now and he's just alone in this moment and like the theatricality

of it and like him in the rain really good fake rain here i have to say i like i like this moment i think this moment actually gets to something or the entire sequence gets something that i find just a little bit frustrating about the film which is that it it is such a theatrical movie and such like a like a bombastic movie that there opportunity it misses opportunities to be like a little more bombastic and so you don't see who shoots the bill paxton character but if if i were directing, right? You would have gotten like a close up of like one of the goons going just to let you know who did it

but also just to add to the kind of like unreality of the whole thing. Well, that's, yes, yes. You're missing and I'm sorry, like an author's voice that like you have it's it's part the first the writer and then it's Cosmetus and then it's also Russell and like there's just no like voice to center.

If Sam Ramey had gotten a hold of this fucking thing do a the Quick the Dead style, but do it on Tombstone, we might have had something here. We might have had something. Is Quick in the Dead the same year as this movie? Are they both 93? Oh, might be.

Yeah. Is that right? I love that movie. Me too. Jesus Christ. It's 95. 95 also stacked. The first time I saw it, I was like,

you're telling me that they made Mortal Kombat in the Old West. Yes. Yes, they did. They did it. Me and my brother would stay up late watching Quick in the Dead, and we repeat, like, creepy, like, not even a line from it. There's that one guy, you might remember where he's just like, peo, pew, pew, pew, phew.

Like, that's his taunt. He's like a dirty guy that goes, phew, phew. You guys would do that to each other? Yes, in the night. Yeah, in the dead of night, you'd hear that. I want to mail both Quicken the Dead and New Jack City to my fat self as a kid, because I didn't watch them as a kid. I watched them both things in the last year, and I'm like,

where the fuck why didn't i watch these movies they're so great and they're so exactly what i was watching but not that right new jack city is a movie that i feel like is underrated these days yes it is it is people you know and i feel like part of that is because like there hasn't been any kind of like a release that comes out to like sell it like a like a criterion kind of thing or some boutique place putting it out you know what i mean like it's just kind of fallen by the wayside but like god damn that's a fucking that that movie has one of the greatest, like, openings of all time. Like, Wesley

just dangling that dude off the fucking 59th Street bridge. It's so good. I am surprised somebody has put, like, a big, nice 4K set out of that one, because it earned it 100%. I didn't even notice this until you said 95, fucking

Sharon Stone did Quicken the Dead and Casino in the same fucking year? What that's not saying? Why isn't she on fucking Mount Rushmore? Just fucking do it. I'm fucking done with this shit. Get her over there. But so he's, they're all dead. They're all dead.

I want to say, think about the Paxton scene, which is honestly like kind of hard to watch because that's a guy that should a thousand percent still be alive in real life. So it's, it sucks to watch this kind of like very realistic death scene. But it is a great note. Because earlier in the film, he talks about how he read this book and he's like getting kind of spiritual. He's like, oh, Wyatt, do you know some people say like when you're going to die? you see this white light that you're supposed to go into and whatever and he says it's bullshit and he's like oh come on Wyatt like open your mind or whatever so then we cut to this scene he's on the pool

table and he's like hey uh Wyatt remember that stuff I told you about the light and he's like oh yeah yeah I can't see a damn thing oh yeah and he just dies and I have to tell you this is the hell the first of two really good death rattles in this movie Paxton has one and then awkwardly so does Kilmer. Very weird. This is a movie that believes your soul leaves your body through your mouth. And that's, you know what I mean? It's a important thing for a movie to decide.

You want to tell the foliarist that? Like, you know what I mean? Like, listen, the soul will be leaving loudly through the mouth. Well, if you dunked your head in a street bucket, I think that would happen to you too. It's kind of great because this is when, like, why it looks defeated. he's got, you know, Morgan at a casket. He's on a sad little cart, you know, wheeled his brother out. His hair's even, like, done differently.

He has, like, a sad hair brushing in this scene. We should quickly mention that Michael Rooker at this point has turned on the cowboy gang and is now part of the crew. Oh, right. Yeah, Michael Rooker and two other guys, which I think are just like, they wind up. It's kind of weird how, like, these guys aren't really characterized all that much, yet at the end of the movie, like, they're part of why it's newly. formed crew. I'll tell you why, because they did take special time to introduce these two guys at the beginning when they first come to town

the two guys that they talked to who explained the gun stuff. That's them. That's them. And I think they're Texas Jack for a million and Creek Jack Johnson, not Jack Johnson, the surf musician. Oh, dude, I was wondering why this cowboy didn't have a pukeshell necklace

on. I was like, what the hell's going on here? I haven't thought of that guy in 20 years. well streak broken yeah you haven't been doing Abercrombie and Fitch in a while dude you gotta go walk in there hear it are those no those stores still aren't around are they they're kind of back actually abercram wasn't there that there was a documentary about like the downfall of them it was and then I think that probably might have spurred them to come back or something oh because it was a down it was a downfall relating to like racism which like you can come back from that in this

country no problem well it's too big to fail Abercrombie and Fitch is too big to fail so but this is the whale Ba which is fantastic Oh man And it's just it's all a ropeadoke Because uh you know They're You know

Powers Booth tells them to finish it at the train station And you think that they're back Take Stilwell and finish it Wouldn't you send Johnny Ringo for this? You know what I mean? Like come on Yeah I don't know you're sending fucking Stillwell dude Come on No you need the heavy hitters for this

And it once and for all And Ike gets Stillwell gets shot in the back here comes Wyatt and he well it's the great where's Wyatt right behind you still well I can shoot him

it's awesome Virgil's in the train with the women going away and that he was going to get shot in the train window there yeah so and then Ike again drops is gone sweet Jesus don't shoot he's always saying he's always getting through you know it's yeah Wyatt

you shouldn't have let him do it you should just execute people in the street is the lesson that is the lesson. Come on now. This move of like he takes his gun from him but then like the weird it looks like he's going to kick him but then he turns his foot and cuts his face

with the spur of his boot. So cool. Dude, I don't think I've ever seen that in a Western before. Very intimate. The tell him I'm coming and hell's coming with me. Oh.

How do you not get chills listening to that? I see a red sash. I kill the man wearing it. I think it is powerful that you see that. And in the background, you see them strapping down Maddie's ginormous laudanum bottle to the top of the train so that it will make the journey. It's like when you fucking win the big football game

and you've got the Gatorade of Coolers, she's just getting laudanum bottle. It is kind of great because at the end of the movie, Robert Mitchell, does this post script. One of it was like, one of the first things, yeah, well, Maddie had an overdose like two days after she left tombstone, you know. Frankly, I feel like they could have probably

cut back to that in the movie and showed you all, but I hear the narrator will just tell you instead. I guess she's not a character. That's fine. So we got our first montage here of these dudes just go around, this new gang going around, taking out the cowboy gang,

some great kills here. Dude, Rooker hits a guy in the face with like the butt of a rifle. Dude, some good blood spatter right there on that shot. Rooker with this 90s wrestling hair he's got on of this movie. It's like long curly, like almost a mullet but not really.

I kind of want, just because it's been built up so much how much fucking Wyatt Earp hates killing and hates being like this. I do kind of when this montage hits, I do kind of want the Madonna, back in business and ain't it crap.

This is kind of the part of the movie where like somebody's like all right, wrap it up. You know what I mean? like we're just going to start moving it on. And I mean, the montages are great. There's this, the opium den one where this guy's trying to hit the pipe, but it's Earp's pistol and they just shoots them through the mouth. I mean, these, these are, they're so funny.

Like all of these, they're like almost topical in how, in how, like, aggressive they are. It's so good. Like this dude, like, yeah, he's like, he's so strung out or whatever. His eyes are closed. He's just sucking on this pistol barrel. Oh, man. Now you almost want, like, someone's like, oh, happy Mother's Day, Ma. Here's a box of chocolates.

the mother rips a wig off and shoots him in the land. Like that kind of level. Yeah, yeah. Someone someone like litters litters in the middle of the street, a Wyatt Earp like shows up like out of the dirt and then like pops him in the head.

Yes, the extreme of the Earp gang policing here. I'd fucking love it. Some dude is riding a horse he gets off of it and it turns out it's Doc Holiday and a wig and it just shoots him. Why is this horse so moist and pale? And then the horse is,

And then the horse is two guys put together. They have guns as well. Oh, man. So we get to this moment where we get to this like river and Curley's got them all surrounded here. This is where it's a moment in the movie of theatricality that did not work for me. It's like, Powers Booth is like, all right, we got you surrounded. What are you going to do about this? And then you can just got this Kurt Russell.

No. Yes. It's like it's like N and then like 27 O's as he slow motion walks Like like fucking Neo in the matrix All these bullets are going past him Part of the legend right

That he never got hit with a bullet or something Never grazed yeah Well I think the movie is breaking I think they're like well this movie We don't know what to do anymore so No No No

This is where my big fat Greek wedding and sex in the city's John Corbett gets got right here he's another dude that's just in this movie added to the tally of dudes in this movie. We didn't even talk about Terry O'Quinn the mayor. Yes. Yes. Oh, right. Yeah. Yes. Beautiful man. Right. Terry O'Quinn is the one who he puts him on blast when they're like, no, we just enjoy

playing snooker and hanging out making all this money. And he's like, you're making all this money off these people from this town who are fucking terrified to live in this town glad you guys are doing so well and Sam Elliott like man that was a total deuce chittle but I think the mayor's got a point. He might be an urp. Is he a secret erp you

think? Because he's talking like one. Secret herb. There is this is what Billy Zane is dead and you see like Dana Delaney like he was too beautiful for this world kind of a thing like the cowboys kind of feel bad about it. You know what I mean? Yeah your friends that did this. He tried to

bring something fine into your ugly world and you shot him for it. Not that you care. I like that Henry the fifth man. Why'd you have to put a bullet in him, geech? Why'd you kill Henry the fifth? Why couldn't you kill that guy who was juggling? That was stupid.

Nobody cares about the juggling man. If I cared about Henry. They didn't shoot the juggler. Oh, yes. They did. So then this is what Jason Priestley quits the gang. awkward line of there's got to be some law

and rides out of the movie and again those two 16 year old girls like I don't think he's coming back I think that that was it and I don't I don't think Luke Perry's going to be in this at all and I didn't see Brian Austin Green yet is he in it? Hey Sarah let's leave but you girls keep it down

I'm a 50 year old man I think it makes me flash to the scene in Clueless when shares like well I'm a Mel Gipp fan and so I know Hamlet and yeah there's a great doc holiday moment here I think it's where

I think Rooker is like like what are you doing this for whatever and he's like oh because Wyatt Earp is my friend and I don't have a lot of friends like Kilmer man he just has these lines of this movie that just really cut deep sometimes and that it's just like

oh like you really felt for him in that moment it's a great like back and forth because like it's like you know why are you doing this it's like well why it's my friend is like I got lots of friends like well I don't and that's like that's so and he also even starts that scene but like what's why I do is like oh he's down by

the creek walking on water oh man I love it weird thing here where there's there's spying across the way here the cowboy gang's coming at him and this is like you realize how crooked being is this is some fucking ice recruitment shit dude like I think it's a a rooker again he's like

appears to be about 30 of them and they're all wearing badges like being fucking deputized all of these gangsters so that if they killed somebody it was well within their right to do so unbelievable this is when Doc Holliday

fall sick they have to go to Charlton Heston's house and Trump Heston's eyebrows house the dye on the eyebrows is really something they took two of the smaller mustaches and just put him up there I think you're right

my old face is made him mustache. You know what I think it was was because if you look at Heston, he's got that half mustache and like dudes would shave the top of it all. So I think they took the top of the mustache, you see. And just glued it up to make the eyebrows.

Real strained budget. Also, yeah, I'm so glad I'm playing Henry Hooker. What a name. And he says, you know, he's going to allow them to stay the night because you know, Doc Holliday is all banged up or whatever.

Also, Josephine and the caravan show up here. Everybody goes to hookers, apparently. But they sort of just share this. That they do. They share this kind of awesome knowing look at one another. And like, there's no dialogue exchange, which I think is actually kind of nice in the moment. But she just sort of rides off like, I don't know what I'm going to see that dick again. And by dick, I mean his penis.

Goodbye. Farewell, penis. This crazy here, again, this is another something happened and there's a deleted scene somewhere because it's like the next morning everybody's waking up at hookers and then this dude you see this dude

on a horse coming dragging someone behind him and he leaves the body and goes off and it's fucking hooker and he's been burned up no no it's Michael Michael Rooker it's Michael Rooker Rooker Rooker and Hooker McMaster's is his character they got McMasters

which is like okay one, I think maybe I heard McMasters once before in this movie, so I'd go to IMDB, who the fuck is McMasters? Oh, no, they got Rooker, but like, where was he? Did he go out to the outhouse to take a shit in the middle of the night? They kidnapped him? Like, if you're setting

somebody on fire in this movie, I need to see that. That would be nice to see, yeah. But Ringo wanted to make sure he got your attention. So that's why they did it. And it seems like this is the scene where, you know, Doc looks like he's at his deathbed.

hookers and they have this big conversation it's kind of cool where Wyatt is like I can't beat him can I it's like no you can't revenge on being born Eric Siska I also just really like the what's it like

wearing that badge and then Wyatt gives him the badge and goes off to his own death and it looks like it's going to be him versus Johnny Ringo didn't think you'd show and oh man here comes to Val Kilmer in one of best scenes. Dude, just smoking, walking

to this scene, I'm your Huckleberry. Oh, dude. And it's awesome too, because Ringo, like, holidays and shadow kind of. And so Ringo obviously thinks that it's Wyatt. And he's just like, I didn't think you had it in you, which is like, it's so good. Oh, douche-ch-chill, dude, not the guy you thought it was. Yes, he's surprised. You look like someone just walked over your grave, Ringo.

And then this is, because he's shit in his pants and he's like, Oh, I was just fooling about before. I wasn't. Oh, I don't look like a person who's walking over the car. I don't look like that. Stop saying that. I don't look like that at all. That's stupid talk.

Baby talk. He shoots him in the head and starts to heckle him afterwards, which is great. One of the great haters ever in film. How much of a hater do you have to be to shoot someone in the head? And then mock him afterwards. It's beautiful. Oh, my God. I love it so much.

You were just too high strung. Exactly. It wouldn't be like, oh, we're two sides and the same course. Oh, you don't know Daisy at all. Oh, shit. Oh, shit. And I do like him when Kurt Russell, like, comes into the scene and he's like, he doesn't say anything.

He's like, what in the fuck? Like, he's looking around. He's like, I, uh, wasn't quite as sick as I made out. Yes. My hypocrisy knows no bounds. No, no, Doc, you can't piss on him. Stop. Stop. Put it away, Doc.

Doc, stop doing that. Come on. I think he looks a little thirsty. I might have some piss line. Doc, stop it. This is some nasty shit that I will not be a party to, Doc. I will see you back at hookers. Wait, wait for the grave at least.

God damn, Doc. Also, great alternate title you could have had right here because this is, we're told, The Last Charge, a Wyatt Earp and his immortals. And it's a cool sequence of like a, you know, a carriage chase or a horse chase, which is what you want. But it kind of comes to nothing and Ike and Behan just quit being cowboys. And like they just sort of shake hands like Wyatt and Doc, like job well done. Like this is where the movie, again, kind of falls apart a little bit.

You don't know how to end it because the, I mean, it is the weird structure of like Powers Booth. Unceremoniously murdered back of that river scene like. Wyatt gets him in the gut with the with the rifle and he just eats shit and that's the end of it. So it's this weird. Yeah. And then like the I guess like second hero or I don't know, maybe fourth hero if you're counting all the Earp brothers before him. But like then Doc Holliday just takes out the number two after the fact. It is it's just sort of weird.

They don't know how to to end this. I mean in this montage, I mean, this, it's cool like why it shoots the dude while he's like hiding. He's like hanging off the horse like hiding behind the horse's head. and you know things like that but you're sitting there like well everybody's dead like is this the movie over with what are we doing go home now can we please go home i would like to uh but then yeah it just cuts we're at greenwood sanatorium in colorado sometime later and so here's doc holiday and he's getting his last rights here and uh hey doc how you doing i'm dying how are you and is forcing him to play a card game.

My God, this poor man. Well, that's how you know that he's truly, you know, the Reaper's coming. Dude, if Doc Holiday doesn't want to get in on a game of cards. Wyatt, I have no interest in playing guess who with you. Does you wear glasses, Doc? Come on. Wake up.

Does you wear glasses? All right, Doc, I'll give you a hint. It's not the fat, bald bus driver, all right? It's not him. You are Cynthia. how does he do it 12 straight games in a row and this is really powerful speech

he's like wheezing it's like if you ever cared about me you would just let me go and go off and get on with the business of living or whatever it is it's really cool I mean yeah go ahead he also reminisces about the one that got away the first cousin

he's going through his whole life that was the biggest cock up because he bangs his first cousin and it was the love of his life. She joins the convent over it. She was all I of a woman. There's a great thing he says, too, to Wyatt. He goes, you're the only human being

in my entire life that ever gave me hope. And I'm like, part of me is like super touched by it. And I'm like feeling it. And then part of me is also like, but this is tombstone. What do we do? Yeah, yeah, yeah. There's also the great moment of like, he asks Wyatt what he want.

And he said to live a normal life. There is no normal life, just life. Get on with it. It is very like, this is like the Oscar speech kind of a little bit. Not in a bad way, but it is. I actually didn't look it up at all. Were there any awards given to this movie? I do not believe so.

And he was not nominated for Best Supporting, which probably could have, but should have been, you know. 93 was a big year for movies. I would have tossed Kilmer a Best Supporting for this, though. This is, I mean, this is just sort of like an iconic role of the 1990s. It's sort of like, It's similar to how it was a crime that Vincent Dinoffrio didn't get a best supporting for Edgar and men in black. Yeah, like what like one, like actually one of the great physical performances of all time.

Yep. Yeah. What does a guy got to do? Well, don't worry, fellas, the MTV Movie Awards for this year had us cover with Valcomer getting a nomination for best male performance and most desirable male. Okay. Did anyone who ever got an MTV movie award like ever? you know where they're like oh do they actually like keep it like i feel like i would have i would have like use it as like a paperweight until someone knocked it off your desk and it shattered

and you were like that's fine maybe there's some on ebay we can score oh i can tell you exactly the one person and maybe he's not the only person but i can tell you the one person i know for sure has kept his mtv movie award and that is when they gave clint howard a lifetime Achievement Award. Oh, man. And he cried during the exception speech. The speech was like the most earnest, sincere thing I've ever seen in my life. That makes you feel legitimately bad.

I feel bad hearing that. He was like so honored. He was so honored to be there. I was like, dude, the fucking year before that, they gave it to Chewbacca. What are you crying for? Don't do that, man. They really did. They really did. But he died.

So he's dead. Yeah, he leaves the It's very sweet. Oh, but this is the other death rattle, right? This is the, I'll be damned. This is funny. And those are his last words. And it sucks, though, man. Talk about great shot right here.

He expires. We cut back to the initial wide of the hospital room. Yes. And he's alone and he's dead. And there's a nurse looking at another patient. And then there's like a nurse over here like not paying attention. And it's this wildly sad like he died and nobody. has noticed and it's like how long is he just

going to fucking lay there dead? You don't know but very sad ending for Doc Holiday. Not the best. That's what he wanted. That's what he wanted. We get Kurt Russell just meets up with Danny Delaney who's been out of this movie for quite some time and you're like who

and it's a very nice scene where it's like let's live off room service like we always wanted. Here comes Robert Mitchum. Here's some things you might have missed. Okay. Let me just get you. Yeah, the power of the cowboy gang was broken forever. And don't worry, I did get shot and killed.

Maddie, let's say, drug overdose. Don't put your coat on yet. I'm not done. The movie is not over yet. Don't you want to hear about what Virgil was up to with his one arm? Well, he became a sheriff in a California town. And you've sports fans who miss the game while you were watching this movie. The lines are up by 10.

And also, like, the weird last line of, like, Harrison Wyatt turned into a quite a bit of a showman. Even Tom Mix was at his funeral. I'm like, that's an anecdote. That's not the way you end the movie. No. It's a fact point. It's a, it's a way you end a movie. If your actual thing is like, boy, the movies.

The Wyatt Earp is so important to the movie. Yes. Yes. Like, that's the whole thing. Like, it's a Hollywood. It's just a jack off. Like, that's all it is. is but I get I like this movie but it's funny to to watch it and think about it because like there's

there's a version of this movie that is about white or the guy created its own legend right and like that's how you end that movie yes and that's I mean part of me when I first heard Robert Mitchum I was like is the Sam Elliott like who's doing this it took me for a minute but like if like that's how you should have ended it Jamel I think you're totally right it's like talk about why the only reason why it Earp is the main character of this movie is because he got to Hollywood and started spinning all these yarns about him and his brothers and you know like john way purported to have met him at one point and like all this that and the other thing and like that's that to me is totally fascinating because it's the only way any of this stuff happened otherwise

it would be like footnotes about virgil and that's kind of it but this dude like spun his own story and then like didn't get to see much of it i will say i think it's like his, what did they say he is? Like his great-grandson or possibly just grandson, but there's a dude in this movie who I think is part of the... He's named Wild Earp. Like he's the

great-grandson or whatever. I think I read he was like a cousin or something like that. Oh, was a cousin? Uh-huh. Yeah. Uh, yeah. Yeah, just totally, yeah, Tom Mixed. But it's like, if you don't know, it's Tom Mix and who's the other guy that they mentioned two like dudes from the westerns and it's like if you don't

know those guys like, yeah. I don't know what it's it's fucking 1993 like nobody remembers it's like oh his funeral was catered by Zabars actually goodbye like I don't know who gives his shit just huge buckets

a salmon chowder for everybody the absolute I think it's unintentionally of course but super hilarious like end end of this movie is how you have the three Earp brothers and Doc Holiday

walking very cool towards the camera in slow motion as all of the names go by I don't think they thought of the fact that oh my God the amount of names that we have to put in these dudes are walking in slow motion for like three straight minutes

they just keep walking further down the street in Tombstone it's so awesome and then like after 40 names go by they can finally cut to just black and then it's Heston gets the hammer at the end of it which is nice but it's just so funny because they get like

as close to the camera as they can get and then it just cuts and they're sort of like far away again walking towards you because you got like four dozen names to get through anyway I thought that was very funny but that is the end of this movie here so we'll go around the horn here for some final thoughts and we'll start with our big guest Jamel

any final thoughts and recommendations for Tombstone so I this is my second time seeing this movie it's great I mean we've referred to it to being a dad for noon movie and that's exactly what it is This is a movie made for men between the ages of 35 and 65. It's for watching on a Sunday. I mean,

I watched it on like a Wednesday morning, but you know, whatever. But it's meant to be watched on a Sunday afternoon when nothing going on. And it's some of the flaws, right, the fact that it can't keep track of time that well,

like the fact that towards the back end, the rush things, kind of just relying on montage absolutely work. When you're just sort of like sitting on a couch. Yeah. And paying attention and kind of not kind of deal. Great Kerr Russell performance. I mean, Val Kilmer is just incredible.

It's Doc Holliday, like so charismatic and really a truly great performance. I like this movie. I would happily recommend it, happily watch it again. It definitely is, it's like getting on my list of maybe if this show pops up, I will pick this up, you know, just to have around. Right, exactly, exactly. Chris Cabin, final thoughts, my friend. you know I like it

I would tell people to see it it's funny that because I had also seen it mostly in chunks for a very long time just catching it on TV and that's like it lends itself to that like the way this thing comes like it is in chunks and like it does

and the time jumps we do really do kind of put things at unease where it lends itself you can watch part of him be like oh that was a fun part and then like feel like you don't even have to see the rest of the thing work to work on its own. This is in comparison to a lot of

the movies that, I mean, I love about Wyatt Earp, like I know I said a few, Frontier Marshal by Alan Duan, also good, long riders by Walter Hill. I know I mentioned him before. He's, he's everywhere. White Earp is fucking everywhere in these movies, and he's, they made a lot of really good ones.

And a lot of them have, I think, done a story about him and gone to his character in a shorter amount of time. This is just like in Hollywood epic. This is just being like, Wyatt Earp, the big Hollywood legend and letting him really come to full bloom. It's fun. It's not like

the most powerful movie I've ever seen, but it works. And my God, the Russell performances, opt here. Chris, the next time we do a live stream from the public, would you show everybody your wider back tattoo you clearly have? We're still getting through it. I have another two sessions to get the color in. Okay?

Right, all right. So when it's all done, we can see it. Yes, don't show it to me and do you have like a little Tom mix in the background crying. crying. I guess it's a kind of good to that. Oh, Mr. Siska, how we feel? Yes. No, it's a recommend. I did see this a bunch as a kid and I did see it all the way through before. But you're right, it does lend itself to just being found on TV. We went on vacation once in Key West Florida and this came on in like the late afternoon. I was like, well, you know, we'll get dinner later. Get dinner later. It's an ass magnet. There are flaws, but they do somehow work like I feel like it's too ambitious. was with the huge ensemble, but like Christy said, it's an epic and you're right. And that ensemble,

which I think kind of almost weakens it, is the strength of the movie. And the reason I like it, seeing all these that guys that are in the cast. Right. And I think if it was paired down to be more of just focusing

on White Earp himself, I don't know, I don't know if I would like that better than what we got here. It's already been done, too. It's already been done. I will check out your movie list. But this is,

but this is still a great, It's still a great movie. This is a lot of fun. Yeah. Mr. Sadek. Yeah, I really love this movie. I grew up with it. I've watched it a trillion times. Again, mostly on television. I agree with all of that stuff. I think, like, yeah, but it is kind of like one of those things where like, even in the 90s, there are better Westerns. You know, you got Unforgiven on a Mountain Top, which is just like a perfect big budget Western movie.

And The Quicken the Dead, which we talked about. You know what I mean? Like, but I think this movie is unfuck withable because of the Kurt Russell and Val Kilmer. pieces of it, which are just so hugely important to both those dudes' careers, you know what I mean? I think that... Oh, yeah. It's like I talked about, you know, Russell in the 90s. It was, you know, there was, there were some tough times for Kurt back

then, you know what I mean? And it's cool to watch him really just strut in this film and, like, just have these iconic lines and know that he's going to wind up on a T-shirt, and literally every single line Val Kilmer has is a T-shirt somewhere. You know what I mean? And rightfully so. You know, like...

Right. It's such a fun performance for him. Yeah, I just, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I'm, I, I, I'm, I, I'm, I, I'm really not gonna say any different than the four of you. Yeah, I'm, I'm, I'm really not gonna say any different than the four of you. Yeah, ass magnet, total dead for noon picture. I want to go, quick look at the TNT listings to see the next time. This will be on, on linear television. Yeah, and you know, like, how important this was, especially to Val, like, he named his autobiography, I'm your Huckleberry. So, you know, it's very special to watch him exceed in such a great thing, especially because he was kind of like eating shit for that Batman just a few years after this. So, you know, no, no, no, I know. I'm not saying it was just saying what happened. I wasn't putting that on you.

I wasn't putting that. Val, no, I've always thought he was a great Batman. But so, like, it was cool that, like, this super career high comes right before what I'm sure was kind of at least a temporary personal low for him. But that is going to do it for this episode on Tombstone, Jamel. Tell people about your new YouTube channel, man. And anything else you want to talk about, but I'm loving Jamel Bowie's takes on YouTube. Sure. So I have this YouTube channel.

It's a bit of an experiment on my part to kind of, like, see if this thing can work. But I'm basically just, like, doing kind of like civics education on YouTube. in addition to other commentary. So it's just Jamel Dash Bowie over at YouTube or takes by Jamel Bowie and that's my YouTube channel

and then you can find me on TikTok and Instagram and Blue Skype if you use that. And of course, you can read me at the New York Times but I understand that people do not like New York Times. So I'm not gonna,

you know, that's at the bottom. Times under TikTok. That is something, man. And I have a podcast unclear and present day. where we watch the political and military thrillers of the 1990s and talk about them in the context of the politics of the decade.

I think we're currently, we're at the end of 97. We're about to do an episode on Wag the Dog, which is a strange movie. But we missed a couple, so we got to go back in time and do G.I.J. Oh, boy. Yeah, there you go.

And murder at 1600. That's the other one. Oh, my God. Of course. Dude, previous episode. ass magnet dad for noon pictures murder at 1600 i'll be late for a dinner date but dude i mean civics lessons now needed more than ever dude so you are clearly doing the lord's work and it's always awesome having you to pop on the showman so come back uh anytime you want oh it's my pleasure thank you guys for having me that is going to do it on this episode

of george p cosmetosis sort of anyway tombstone uh if you want more we hate movies though including episodes just like this one but there you guessed it totally commercial free head over to that patreon patreon.com slash we hey movies every tuesday the episode you listen to here that may have commercials on it over there zero commercials but this has been of course our big we love movies months and we're doing a lot of awesome stuff including a really rock and animation damnation steve say that that's right on beavis and buthead due america full feature length episode on that great great animated picture hell yeah man that was super fun and uh we also a couple weeks ago had melro 210 come out

chris cavan oh yes we have uh the great uh donna debate does she get to graduate or not who could possibly give a shit i don't know uh and then of course we are continuing baby napping uh in melrose place it is the hottest trend uh in l a at the time is taking other people's babies and saying they're crazy when they want the back. It's just really just an incredible time with Joe and Kim in that show. Absolutely. And last week, if you're still catching up

with Patreon offerings, because of course, if you're listening to this on the day it comes out, this is it because we've got the holidays coming out so we didn't want to drop any shows during Thanksgiving, of course. So Eric, last week, Thursday and Friday, it was a bit of a sci-fi week.

That's right. We had the Darth Vader Gleap Glit Gloucestry that's to share for the, the table for both the free folk who listen on north of the wall and then also for the Patreon people also get that Darth Vader episode on that feed as well but also the blaster rifle we did an episode on a blaster rifle just to see if it could be done and folks it worked oh we did it yes a lot of fun and of course the nexus we're doing a big honkin movie episode full, huge.

I think it's two hours on undiscovered country. That's the sixth installment of Star Trek the TOS movies and it is a humdinger of an episode. Love that. We also did a big old after dark hang a couple of weeks ago. You can still listen and watch listen to that, watch that. We got another one coming up in December for our top tier patrons. Those are fun. We're just hanging out talking movie news. We did the little relationship advice.

It gets wild on that. Oh, yeah. I got to tell you, the relationship advice thing was awesome. And I'll tell you this, if we get one of these after dark questions and start being more like, uh, like, yeah, relationship helpers or advice or by the asshole, we'll tell you if you're being an asshole, don't worry about that. If anything blows up in your face based on our advice, that's on you. You ask the podcast.

We're not, we're not doctors. I can't look at a picture and just, just go to some. It's a rash, dude. I don't know. But so, as always, here on We Hey Movies, that's just a smattering of this month's Patreon offerings. But as always, the show continues next week. We're already going to be in December, which is wild.

I can't even believe this year is over. But Steve Sadek next Tuesday, what are we talking about? We are talking about just friends. Talk about movies that are on television. This movie was Comedy Central from like 2009. To 2014, I think. It was just non-stop. Ryan Reynolds in a fat suit.

I remember when this movie came out, we were working at the multiplex at the time, and just being horrified of the poster that just sat in the same poster case for like at least a month. And it was just him in that fat suit. It's fucking terrifying. So until next week with Ryan Reynolds in a fat suit,

I've been Andrew Jupin. Stephen Sadek. Eric, Cisco. Chris Cabin. Jamel Bowie. Take it easy. Thank you.