We Hate Movies - S16 Ep854: White Noise 2: The Light (2007)

Episode Date: March 24, 2026

“Always love a scroll…” - Steve on the film’s opening textOn this week’s episode, Listener Request Month takes us to Direct-to-DVD-Sequel Land as we’re tasked with watching and chatting about a horror sequel absolutely no one was asking for, White Noise 2: The Light! With Firefly’s Nathan Fillion and Battlestar Galactica’s Katie Sackhoff leading this cast, is this movie like the SyFy Channel prom, where all your science fiction adventurers are getting together? How in the world does Dennis’s Diner stay in business after this opening incident? How hilarious is that Looney Tunes piano death? And are there really that many near-death experiences (NDEs) per day in this country? PLUS: A brief history of the Direct-to-DVD sequel craze of the aughts!White Noise 2: The Light stars Nathan Fillion, Katie Sackhoff, Adrian Holmes, Kendall Cross, Teryl Rothery, William MacDonald, Josh Ballard, and Craig Fairbrass as Henry Caine; directed by Patrick Lussier.Be sure to visit the WHM Merch shop over on Dashery and check out all the latest show-related designs you can slap on t-shirts, hats, coffee mugs, stickers, whatever! Make your friends jealous by flaunting some WHM merch today! Original cover art by Felipe Sobreiro.

The Bell Air Direct app includes crash assist, which detects an accident the moment it happens, and even offers you emergency assistance at the tap of a button. Okay, but what if I don't have an accident? Well, just keep on, keeping on. Bell Air Direct, insurance, simplified. Conditions apply. This week on the program, we venture back to the aughts to the magical time of direct-to-d-div-d-D-D-D-Dquels no-one was asking for. It's white-noye. I'm Andrew Juppin.

Stephen Seda. Eric Siska, 2, Colin the Light. Chris Cabin. And we hate movies. Hello, everyone. Welcome to We Hate Movies. Thank you for tuning into the fine program as always. Yes, that's right.

Listen to Request Month. Soldiers on. We're talking, yeah, it's White Noise 2, Colin the Light from 2007, directed by Patrick Lucier. This dude has quite a nice idea. I meant to look at back up because the name popped. Because he did a great job here.

He did such a good job. A lot of previous episodes, I think. So check this out. I'm not saying all of these are. previous episode. This is most of us photography. Prophecy 3 colon the Ascent. Oh, no. Got it. Dracula 2000 previous episode. Dracula 2

colon ascension. Dracula 3 colon legacy. Then this movie. Then the My Bloody Valentine remake. Dracula the college years. Secret Nazi Dracula. Dracula the dentist. Van Dracula. And then he did Drive Angry.

Which did we do an episode on 9th? We all saw in theaters for some reason. We did. Well, I mean, Nick Cage, William Bickner. The mid-2000s, that's what you did. You got your friends together and you saw. Yes, and you went to go see an Amber Hurd movie. And sometimes your friend had a little acid and he gave it to you before a Nick Cage movie. And you're like, oh, that's cool. What happened happened? Did you watch it on acid? Oh, good for you. That's awesome, dude. But then after Drive Angry's three movies I haven't heard of,

Trick, Play Dead, and Aftermath. Those could be any movie. Exactly. Exactly. And I believe this dude is now very comfortably, very successfully, I think, working in television. And it's not the Schwarzenegger aftermath or is it? I don't remember. It's aftermath. Is that a newer Arnold movie?

It was one of the later ones. Yeah, yeah. I have to stay late and try to do the math problems on the board like Goodwill hunting. Oh, yes. 2017 aftermath, Arnold Schwarzenegger and Scoot. Oh, no, no, no.

Nope. He did not direct the Arnold. Okay. Is this his? Let's see, is this perfect? I bet you thought there was just a genesis? the Arnold movie was from 2017. This is from 2024 with

Dylan Sprouse. Oh wow. Mason Gooding. Deishan Lockman is also in this movie. A returning war veteran stricken with PTSD unwittingly gets trapped with his teenage sister on Boston's Tobin Memorial Bridge as a heavily weaponized group of ex-military revolutionists take everyone hostage.

Get down. After the Tobin Bridge. It's a movie that just takes place on a bridge. I hate that. How do you like them apples? What's that Slice Stallone movie that did that? Oh, fuck. Daylight, daylight, yeah.

No, no, no, no. The bad one. The recent one. Armored was a movie. Armored, I think, is an all bridge movie. Oh. You know, or Alarum. Yes, that's what it was.

Allerum's going off. Arnold, the best part of my day is every morning I pick you up with Dunkin' Donuts. I hope you're not there because it's such a genius. I want you. Every day I knock on the door and I hope you're not behind it. No, not you. Don't do this to me. Don't do this to me, Robin Williams.

I stayed late and I did the aftermath while everyone was gone. It would appear I've gone to see about the girl. Oh, hey, Stelensky, I'll God, your life's work, all these math problems. They're so easy to me. They're bullshit. I'm burning them in front of you. How do you like that, apple strudel? How do you like damn apple?

Prostoodles. There you go. Market print. Let's move on to the next one. I wish you wouldn't do that every time. He's got to do it all over again. Thank you. Thank you, Arnold. I am truly a director at heart. I cannot tell myself. This movie, White Noise 2, Colin the Light, was requested by Luis from Tucson. Let's hear what he had to say. Hey, guys, this is a Louise from Tucson. I'm calling to request White Noise 2, The Light, from

2007. The episode you all did on the first one is one of my favorites. And I think this movie is then I got it, by the way. It doesn't take itself as seriously as the first one. And while going from Michael Keaton, the naked Phillyen is a step down. Keaton was so snoozy in that first one that's basically washed. Thanks, guys. Yeah, all right, I don't know about it. And I got it, by the way.

Maybe. You think so? I don't know. I will say I was, I got stuck watching a little bit of white noise like four years ago on hotel TV. It was a bit of an assmate. It was a real, like, just go to sleep. And I did. I was like 30 minutes and I'm like, dude, just go to sleep.

You're not even enjoying yourself that much. Just go to sleep. It's a bed magnet. Yeah, exactly. I don't know. I honestly don't know because it was funny. We're talking off the air about this. Eric was not on Budok Saints to All Saints Day.

I was not on white noise and we're doing the others. So this listener request month is sort of helping you guys. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I've never seen white noise. I still haven't seen white noise. It's okay. It's not this. The weird thing, this is, it's not on MDB.

It wasn't on Wikipedia either. But I would bet. real money on Kalshi and be an asshole by doing it. I would bet money that this movie was written as something else. Someone looked at it and like, we could make this a white noise sequel and change this, change that. Because there's no electronic voice phenomenon in the movie. And, you know, this isn't, this doesn't follow the same thing that the first movie does.

And I will say, not to knock Phileon, because I like Phileon, I've always had nothing but goodwill for Nathan Phileon. Michael Keaton's just a more engaging action. You know what I mean? And you don't have the fat guy from Ace Ventura, too, and the second one. He's replaced by Katie Sackoff. Katie Sackoff, Nathan Fillion. This is the sci-fi network prom.

Yes. It's what you always wanted to see. Your favorites from Firefly and Battlestar are getting together, maybe. Someone was saying they're going to reboot that Firefly. That's like the rumor right now. There's some announcement at the time of this recording, you probably already know, in a couple of days at the time of this recording, I think mid-March, there's going to be.

some Firefly announcement and nobody knows what it is. And now is Whedon still allowed to work or his sex crimes He had a secret show on HBO for a little while. Is that right? What was it called Chris? Like the carnival or the ballerinas or something?

I don't even read it. The Carnival of the ballerina. No, I don't know. I don't have my phone in front of me now. It sucks. Well, because we've moved on like he was a sex criminal for a little bit. It now is that mysterious,

maybe he killed a kid when he was a kid thing. What? Is that how he was beginning? That was a while ago. That was a while ago. What was that about? Is that how he got his powers? He did some interview where he sort of like alluded to some sort of like pseudo stand by me as thing where like someone went down to a thing to see about a something and a kid died.

Wow. And Steve, the show you were thinking of was called the nevers. The nevers. Nevers. It's a natural thing. Nevers have seen. Yeah. I want to say HBO, but it might not have been, but I believe it.

It is. Yes. Okay. If, okay, I guess the, I guess the, wait, wait, it says network HBO in 2021. Then it says network to be in 23. Yeah. Well, at least the poster on IMDB is an ad that has HBO max all over. So yeah, I think he just moved out of that. But yeah.

But this, yeah, it's because this is not an electronic. There's a big, nice scroll, which I appreciate, always love a scroll. Absolutely. To get you into the world. of this direct duty because we have to just set the stage a little bit for the younger kids. Yeah. In the mid 2000s, around 2007.

All right. We should we should clarify my opening remark. You have people don't understand. There was just this surge of we there's IP out there. We're not going to reboot it. We're not we're not doing that. It's just low hanging fruit IP that we could just make a sequel to. Roadhouse got a couple. Hollow man. Hollow man got one. Joyride. Joyride got

two of them. I watched Joyride too. the other day, by the way. Really? How does that treat? Yeah. It sucks. Wrong turn. Wrong turn.

A bunch. There's like four wrong turn movies now. Yeah. Usually the more horary, but there was some action stuff too. Like there was just this, this glut of like, this is how we sell DVDs now. We could just slap the two. I think a lot of them were. It's all about deceiving dads.

Yeah. Exactly. Also. Fuck yeah. I love that first one. Yeah, exactly. Also, and big wince all around. Jeepers creepers.

Oh, yes. Yes. No, those are, yes. At least two and three was in, what? I saw two in theaters. Oh, God. Like an idiot. After the, after you heard of what that.

I was like 17. I don't know what was going on. Give folks an idea, though. I just pulled up Wikipedia direct-to-video sequel. So I'll have to, because we're very specifically talking about the aughts here. I think it was the directed DVD. So you had things like 8mm, millimeter, two. Yes.

30 days of night, colon, dark days. Oh, there was that SWAT one that we did an episode. There was a swam. Firefight or some firestorm. Firefight, good memory. Ace Ventura Jr. Colin Pet Detective. Pardon me?

Yeah, that came out, dude. Absolutely. Better not be a blowjob of that one. Bachelor party two, colon the last temptation. Backdraft two. Just all of these, like nobody was asking for them. And like Steve said, there are scripts that kind of came close to being franchise adjacent. And they were like, let's just tweak a thing here or there.

And now it's backdraft two. But I will say, at least from this. test subject we're dealing with here, White Noise 2, these direct to DVD movies were better than the direct to streaming movies we've been getting. Yeah, that is absolutely true.

Which I never thought would be possible. I always thought when these were coming out, I was like, that's the bottom of the barrel. This has real production value. It looks like, it wasn't, but it looks like a movie that could have been released at theaters. It certainly wasn't. I mean, like, Lucy, like,

not everything here is an astounding achievement, but like Dracula 2000 is a real. movie. Yeah, the My Bloody Valentine remake is actually pretty good. You know, so like he's a dude that can direct a movie. A little pissed off. It's not Dracula 2002. Yeah. I do not

appreciate that. I don't understand why we felt the need to drop the year there, you know, in those other two movies. Last night we were at the bar and they were playing a lot of new metal and we were just talking about new metal movies. Oh, you know what should do? We'll watch a dumb movie on a Friday night. We should watch a new metal movie. Dracula 2000

was in the running. Yeah. But instead, we watched Spawn and I really wish you watched Dracula did that. Because Spawn is not technically new that. No, it was less. There's like a Marilyn Manson song in it and like, you know, there's some bad techno going on. It just sucks. It was a team up

soundtrack. It was like Judgment Night did this too. Yes. Where like you get like an electronic artist and rock and rollers and they make a song together. I think a judgment night, it's a rap fans and get like metal guys to do songs over it. When Diddy did that fucking song for the

Godzilla said. Come with me, dude. He was good. He was playing that at his party. Come on all. Come with me. No, come on, guys. Come with that. Okay. Ten, nine, eight, seven. Nobody gets to everybody else come and then I come

last. It's my fucking freak off. Jared, I am not seeing enough baby oil on you, buddy. Let's get some more on them cheeks. Feels like I'm at a ditty party. So what you were saying about the text there, Steve, I didn't, I wasn't, I wasn't court stenographer, like Mr. Siss has got it. But I have it if you want. Do you have it?

Most deaths happen in urban areas, by the way. I was trying to tell you, I was going to tell you guys this before we started record, but I said I'd save it for air. I was like, I was like starting the movie walking across the house for a second, grab me, so I look over, I see that the, these, this come up on the screen. Four paragraphs. I let out of verbal, oh, boy. I went, oh boy, in my own house.

Hell yeah, you did, dude. And then I paused everything to write it all down. Nearly 10,000 people die every day in the United States. The majority of deaths occurring in urban environment. As such, a resident of a metropolis might encounter up to 1.7 people per day who will be deceased by day's end. Wow. That is from the North American Statistics Institute 2002. Okay.

But the fun keeps going. All right. You think the movie would start. You would help. There's another thing here. on average there are 774 near-death experiences, parentheses, NDE. We call them N-D-E. We call them N-D-E.

If you know them, if you know them very well, you'll call them in. Per day in the United States. So, 774 near-death experience per day in the United States, during which a person is pronounced dead, and encounters a blinding white light before being resuscitated. And that is from the National Center for Morality Studies, 1992. Morality studies? I don't know what that is. Reality studies. But I think that

because this is trying to ape the first movie was just... Or said mortality study. I would imagine mortality. Oh, okay. I thought the church was telling you. Because the first movie I'm not mistaken, it explains with electronic voice phenomena. Yeah, correct. Which the white noise refers to. Yes. Which is just sort of like, oh, you know, an art bell thing. I'm like, oh, people can hear, blah, blah, blah, blah. Yeah. I went

on a tear on the first white noise episode talking about my obsession with the promotional website for that film. Because they were like, go to the, you know, white noise movie.com or whatever it was. And you will be able to hear examples of this. And guys, when I tell you, I locked right in. I remember very specifically, I was still living with my parents. I had the headphones on.

It was all dark in the living room. I'm in front of the big boxy computer. Let's watch and listen to some ghost videos. Oh, yeah. I honestly, instead of all of that, and thank you, Eric, for gingham. it all down. But I think they should just explain to you. White noise

is something that people put on to go to sleep. It's very easy to just drift off to sleep while you're watching this. I use it every night. I haven't heard a ghost talk to me yet. Not just yet. It's just not. You're sleepy. But here you go. I mean, let's copyright, copyright, copyright, white noise three colon the white noise machine.

They're so ubiquitous these days in a way that they were not in 2007. Oh, and the ghosts are giving you like post-abnotic suggestion. And you wake up and you start doing Evil shit. Killer. There's an evil ghost emperor, I assume, who is now, has taken over. The ghost emperor is called the Lord God.

You take over a body of a tech guy and he's like, there's an app. Now we're going to launch the white noise app that's got by on everybody's phone. And now it's five days from now. This is a movie that would end with someone yelling, turn it off to Tom Atkins is trying to pull a switch to get some stuff. Right. Like he's taking an axe to a server room in a skyscraper. Yes, dude, fuck yeah. We are going to write White Noise 3, calling the app.

Consider it done. I'm sure, you know, a lot of heavy hitters listen to the show now, right? If you own the IP for White Noise, we got a really good idea that can be a pretty cool direct-to-streaming concept. But I think the 1.7 number seems high in terms of just me walking around. That guy's going to be dead. Yeah. One and a half of those guys is going to be dead. Do you see a shimmering aura around them?

I do not. That's what I think they're putting that clearly fake thing. at the beginning of this movie. To justify the fact that, like, at every turn, he's seeing glowing people in this movie. He's seeing, like, three on a street at one point. I'm like, dude, that's too many dead people. Exactly.

Well, that's some sort of fucking final destination accident with that person. This is very final destination. Oh, big time. It absolutely. I think I'm letterbox to refer to this as stupid final destination. I wish it leaned into it more, actually. Yep, absolutely. More deaths?

Yeah, that'd be great. We start just with, like, Nathan Phileon being nice guy, dad. You know these people are fucking. To borrow a phrase from Boondock Saints, they might as well have toe tags on already. Oh, big time. What I don't get is the wife giving him this present, this wedding gift or anniversary gift of nine years

and it's engraved would not. Just make it 10 years. You just wait until they get engraved gifts for nine? What are you doing? Then I look at nine? Like, what? No, 10. Then you got to top that for 10, right?

You got a top and engrave, a nice engrave. Well, it's going to be a Rolex next time. Nine is a nice sweater and maybe a concert ticket if you really want to get fancy. Absolutely. But you're totally right, though. Just make it 10 when you write the screen.

When you write the screenplay, make it 10. That's the tragedy of it, though. They don't even get to the double digits. Oh, no. And also, I imagine, I think it's longaninas or something like that. It's like, I'm sure they were like, here's a little money for you to make your white noise too. Oh, absolutely. Just put our little, beautiful watch here.

Very fancy. Very clearly. This little kid has the worst haircut I've ever seen. It's like a botched. bowl cut, isn't it? What are you saying? You're making fun of this kid's physical features? No, I meant the ghost.

The ghost didn't look good. No, the kids got like, it's like a botched bowl cut, though, isn't it? It's like a Prince Valiant kind of a thing. It's got a swoop. Yeah, there's a swoop to it that's really unimportant. Disgusting. Oh, that's a, we call those DSVs in the business. Oh, in the industry, we call those DSPsps.

In the urban areas, if you walk down the street, you might encounter one point seven disgusting shit boys or as we call them DBSs. And then actually they're called DDB's Disgusting Dead Boys. But yeah, Nathan Phileon is Abe Dale and yes, the wife 9 year anniversary. There's something

here that I think... Abe Dale? Is this supposed to be 75? I don't know, it's weird. It's me Abe Dale. I'm sleep in a barrel. Larry the Camel guy passed on this. Oh, dude, great movie. Jingle all the way too. That was Larry the Camel guy.

That was one of the directest. DVD no one asked for? Absolutely. Previous episode. The thing that the movie starts doing right here, and I don't think it quite clocks it, it forgets that it sets this up, but like, she's having weird headaches, and you get

the headaches, Abe Dale, and it sets up that like there's some sort of medical emergency festering maybe or something like that. This comes to absolutely nothing. She's getting possessed. It's the third day, you understand. She's starting to get maybe possessed by the devil. To go crazy.

Oh, because she was saying, oh, that's what that is, the headaches, okay. Say what it is now for people. Yes. But I do think maybe you should watch this. It's kind of a good, bad movie. I agree. But, yeah, so in the third day or whatever, third day after you can save. So if someone saves you from being killed, the third day, you will be a mass shooter.

Yes, essentially. You go crazy and kill other people for some reason. And you say Tremara or you write Tremera. Like, it's like the Fungarian. kidding it. I'm like, the code work. And Nathan Phelan goes crazy trying to prevent certain things. Like, also who cares? Yeah, I don't know.

Like, yeah, I saved someone and then they killed some, like, my business ended. That's him now. My thing, yeah, like, halfway through the movie when he discovered, I would say, it happens actually a little too late that he discovers this in the movie because, like, the movie kind of ends. Yeah. I would, I would just be like, okay, then I'll just stop saving people. Like, it sucks about those other people.

You know what? If I see the aura, I'm just going to, from now on, I'm just going to go on about my day. The Bell Air Direct app includes crash assist, which detects an accident the moment it happens, and even offers you emergency assistance at the tap of a button. Okay, but what if I don't have an accident? Well, just keep on, keeping on. Bell Air Direct, insurance, simplified. Conditions apply.

I mean, I think the reason why he kind of keeps going is because by that point, by the time he figures it out, he wants to bang Katie Sackhoff. Sure, yes. Just do that. Tough situation. But she's going to go crazy, dude, because he saved her. It's called marriage. Special guest Al Bundy on the pod this week.

But it's great. She's having bad headaches. They're in this like picturesque yard. And then it's like, hey, you want to go get breakfast? And now we're in like Dennis's Diner or whatever. Dennis's Diner, dude, which I'm stunned is still in business at the end of this week. Because these events at Dennis's Diner are a closed for business. It's the same waitress.

She would absolutely quit. She would 1,000% quit this job. Why? Because she saw it. Like she usually serves Screens. scrambled eggs and now she had some their scrambled brains towards her. Yes, yes. You might

wait tables across town, you know what I mean? I think you're moving home for a little while. The fucking kid's DNA is still on you. Like, just fucking stop. Order up. Yeah, so, now we have to say what happened backwards like Boondock Saints. Seriously. So a guy walks in and shoots his wife and kid in the head.

The wife starts saying this Trey Amara, the son starts saying, you don't know what the fuck's going on. This dude comes in. And he's just like, I'm so sorry. And he fucking blows the two of them away in front of Phileon and then just puts the gun right to his own chin. And should have killed himself, by the way. This is a really dumb. It's stupid.

He lives through the suicide attempt here. Something to be thrown to the Moral Studies Institute that we were talking about in the beginning is the guy who blows, the killer who suicides himself, blood everywhere for suicide. The mother and the son, no blood. We're very careful about the kid specifically because the mother is like slumped over. The kid is just like peacefully in the corner like he's not spaghetti, you know what I mean?

Like he should probably be spaghetti. She kids have a clear blood. It's like water. I see. Oh, is that so? In the world of the movie. Oh, I see. The poor dear, he was just scared by the bullet and that killed him. He had a little heart attack. Oh, you had a little kid heart attack.

Well, because it's amazing because they're having breakfast. Journey's playing. Yeah, she's like freak it out a little bit and then like he's like, okay, she knocks over her plate of eggs, the waitress. Dude, he just yells, can we get some fucking help? Exactly. Like, dude, first of all, your wife threw the plate on the ground.

Don't be yelling at the weight step. Well, because she's like collapsing. So I think it's like he thinks she's like having a heart attack or something. But he's more concerned about helping this hot waitress pick up the eggs. I think it's like done with the what you think it would be like, can we have help here, call the paramedics? No, it's about cleaning up the plane. We need some more eggs over here, please.

Oh my God, I'm so sorry for these hash browns are everywhere. Let me listen. Shut up, shut up. So you're trying to be like an actress or how's that work? Oh, Officer Mottie. Come over here. Yeah, we need help with these eggs. There's pancakes, too.

Could you get that once under the chair over there? Ninth wedding anniversary. Oh, yes. Oh, yeah. Well, you're a waitress. You probably got places to go. Why don't you have to take this watch? Never be late again.

Do you have MySpace or Facebook? Friend me on Myspace. So we cut the three months later. and Abe is lost in his grief and missing his family. He's talking to his buddy Marty here, played by Adrian Holmes. I know this dude from Star Trek Strange New Worlds. He's played an admiral on a couple of episodes.

But this guy, most famously now, though, is the serious version of Uncle Phil on that Bel Air. Do we still do that? I think it's ended now, but it lasted way longer than I thought it was going to. Just Bel Air, right? Just Bel Air is what it's called. What is this?

They made a dramatized reboot of Fresh Prince of Bel Air. Oh, I would never. Called Bel Air, I think it was on Peacock. Yeah. And it was like a serious drama concept of the same idea. Interesting. West Philadelphia, born and raised, but now it's all like we're serious and whatnot. And so this guy from this movie plays like the serious version of Uncle Phil.

So it's not fun. No. It's not a comedy at least. Yeah, it's very, very serious. Dark, gritty drama. And that's this guy's not nearly fat enough to be Uncle Phil, unless he's fattened up But I doubt it

I don't think so He's looking good Admiral whatever the fuck Admiral April Is a he's on Strange New Worlds And he's just a fit To get fat One of our great fat actors

Thank you Exactly Everyone needs to get fatter So he's like Watching old videos Of the family and stuff Can you see where this is going You put on the home movies

Right before you're going to OD Do we know what Nathan Philian's job is Because we see it a couple of times Oh he runs a company where they do job stuff? Yeah. Business of some degree. Typing.

He's in a room with one computer and everybody else outside is with other computers. It's stressful, you understand. You see, you know that he's the boss because he's got a corner office and then there's a floor full of people that are always looking at him, you see. And this could be a magazine. Yep, definitely could be a magazine. This could be an ad agency. Architect firm, architect firm? He's got the corner office and his family got the coroner's office.

That's pretty. Did you say it at the water cooler? Hang you heard about the boss's wife and the sun, so he's got the corner office. He's right behind him. Oh, thanks for that error. Thank you. No, no, thanks.

I'm starting to glow because he's going to kill me. But so he leaves this like suicide message on Abe's voice. Do you call it your business partner about this? No, no, it's an outgoing answer machine. He changes it to, by the way. Oh, is that one is? Yes, it is. If you bothered to fucking check on me, I'm dead.

I thought this was a fucking phone call. No, no, because Abe does call him, but it's the outgoing message. It's like, I'm sorry for what I had to do, but you understand I've been so much pain or whatever it is. Thanks a lot, Marty. Oh, also, by the way, if this is the gas company, you can shut off my service. Believe it or not, I'm killing myself. Eating pills by the pound. Okay, I guess I'll leave the pizza by the door then.

I don't know why you ordered this. Yeah, I know your policy's 30 minutes It's free I'm sorry if you rushed But you just leave it on the ground Yeah, I would also not bother leaving a message after the beep Because I will be dead by the time you know I just want to be clear about that You'll be wasting your own time

If you leave a voice message Don't even bother saying your name or where you're calling from I don't need any of that I'll be dead What a drama queen A little bit I mean it's very clearly a cry for help Because you this will get people to save you

If you just left a note You know what I mean Probably be okay Exactly So Marty brings him to the hospital here And we see him being worked on the table And this is where he has this out of body experience To say kind of a nice thing about this movie

I like the effect of him going up I think the tunnel looked pretty cool Because he's looking into which also like hilariously is I think where people get a lot of these Oh I see a light is because you're looking up at the light of the goddamn You know the surgery doctor's helmet Yeah exactly that's what the light was It's just like sort of a dream kind of

But yeah he's sort of like floating up towards it He sees the wife and the sun there and everything like that. And then... Kids got that haircut for eternity, by the way. That sucks. Bummer. Oh. Yeah.

You're just, you're fucking going to heaven looking like that. Can't grow that shit out. Did he have like... St. Peter was probably pretty disappointed. Some moose or something out there? Yeah, he's pretty silent about it. Ectoplasm. Oh, yeah.

Because you go, so you just wipe your ass with your hair. I mean, better. He's going to get some shit in Heaven High School. Oh, heaven high, dude. Yeah, totally. Coming up after the game, it's Heaven High. Yeah, that's exactly what you think it is. Principal Peter is going to come and wrap the knuckles of the youngans of Heaven High.

You got a new student, ball haircut, got shot in the face on a diner. After the game. Heaven High. So he wakes up to Nurse Sherry Clark, played by Katie Sackoff here. And, you know, you can tell she's alternative and fun because she's got fucking purple highlights in her here. She's a little too fun and flirty for the suicide. Ward, I would say. Well, maybe she's there to give people the will to live.

Normally, I'm down with, like, the pediatric unit, and I'm fun nurse Jackie or whatever, but I got to be up here and I can't, I can't change my bit, sorry. And she says her favorite movie of all time is Frankenstein. It's bride of Frankenstein. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Here comes the motherfucking bride, man. Yeah.

At the time of this recording, that's getting that great. Yeah, I'm seeing it tomorrow. I'll find out. But so Abe starts sort of like hearing stuff. in the hospital, the TV monitors all sort of turned to white noise at this point. Which is the movie, by the way, which the movie will not be the movie in like five minutes. We have a little here and then we see a TV later and that's it. Yes, exactly.

Pretty much. Now, I was realizing like this movie, the sound design is not great because I had the subtitles on and there's so many instances, including right here, where they tell you that you're supposed to be able to hear what very, very, various voices are saying, but you cannot unless you have subtitles on. Because right here, like when the... I did not have subtitles. I couldn't get any of this. Stuff in the room like starts fluttering around or whatever. There's like one of those like electric exit signs and the lights flashing.

And like as it's flashing, you're supposed to hear, go away. Go away. But like, if I didn't have the subtitles on, it's just braw-br-br-no. No, ghost, it says exit, not go away. But yes, you go out to go away through the exit ghost. Because I believe what happens in the first movie, he doesn't have an NDE, but he does,

like he's just trying to find his wife through the noises. But he's got BDE though. He doesn't know, yeah. Always has. Absolutely. I think he similarly in that movie works for like a vague architecture firm. Sure, of course.

So we were introduced to a character that would go really well in an Eric Roberts stalked by my doctor movie. This is Dr. Caros. Dude, if I wake up in the hospital and my guy's there with a whole, Yian shirt on. With a goatee and an earring?

Yeah. Am I dead? Am I in hell? First of all, he's, uh, his name is Dr. Karras, which is a nod to the exorcist a little bit. Is it? Yeah. But why?

There's no exorcism. Is this just the IMD thing says that? But his name is Karras. I mean, that's, I mean, it's a spooky. But it's like spelled differently. And I think he says Keros. I don't know if I don't, I don't, I don't think it's. It was spelled in mine.

It was K-A-R-R-O-S. Okay. Yeah. Fair enough. We'll drop that. But he's dressed like a G.I. Joe villain. Like literally, he looks like, because he's a big beefy dude

with this like goate, stark bald head. And he's got the Hawaiian shirt, but a doctor coat over it. Like, he should have a three ready made machine guns next to him. Absolutely. Yeah, like a little robot guy that follows him around.

Exactly. He can talk to him. He might be fucking it. We don't know. Oh, he is. But it's like, yeah, you just, you look at this and it's like, if like the wrestler earthquake had a goatee. Yes, exactly. This guy. I'd be like, I'm in hell or like, could someone else possibly see me?

And they must have known somewhere along the way, right? That like something happened and we got to turn him over to this guy. Because this guy is the NDE like research expert at this hospital. He's got a whole wing dedicated to this shit. Oh my gosh. You know what? This guy was also in Hollow Man too. Oh, she's making the round.

Oh my God. I got to see that. That rocks. But also, so he's, yeah, you have fun flirting nurse. He's just like, I hope you're okay. Bye. And then here comes big G.I. Joe doctor who's got this secret NDE project. Where is the social worker or the psychiatric evaluation for this guy who literally just tried to kill himself?

That doesn't matter. Yeah, I guess that's usually why they keep you in the hospital afterwards. No, you want to, I can tell you a ghost story. He's like a spooky scary story. That's the way, that's, we'll heal you through ghosts. stories. So you want to you want some therapy or something? Let me show you the budget for this hospital real quick. If you want to take

a look, get your glasses on. It's kind of surprising because like sometimes these movies have this and sometimes these movies don't, which is a the vaguest, loosest reference to the first movie. Yes. And you figure right here, this guy is going to mention something about his buddy, the fat guy from Ace Ventura

2, who also got killed in the first movie. He was doing all this research. He befriended this guy, Michael Keats, and blah you know this is the opportunity for it it doesn't happen and he's still helping with the research yeah still to this day right just helping behind the scenes at this point after a ghost tornado kills him i believe he is whipped he is whipped up a bunch of ghosts like whip around him and he just falls down dead and that's how that movie has yeah it's a ghost tornado man it's very dumb but yeah so this guy's like oh uh you're probably seeing all these horrors it's kind of a side effect from uh this experience

you know, it'll wear off in a couple days. So he's trying to go back to work like you do in all these movies. He goes back to the work factory office where he does his jobbing. And this is where we're getting some glitches. And like, this is not, to me, this is not a horror movie. Insofar as like it's not trying to scare you all that much. But we do have these lame, you're going to see a ghost's face and a TV really. That is scary.

Classic supernatural thriller. Yeah. Supernatural thriller, I think, is probably a better way to put. Bone-chilling horror. And his good buddy is just like, hey man, you know, you can take a couple days off from job factory work if you wanted because you did just try and fucking kill yourself. And I literally saved your life from killing yourself.

And he's like, yeah, yeah, yeah, shut up. I'm my hearing stuff and I have to go follow it. And he's like following, he's like, I've got to go outside and get some air. He goes outside and he's hearing like voices or whatever. We got this mime here. Like it's the opening of the conversation. You can't just have a mime in a movie. This mime has to be part of what's going on right here.

I agree. Bring a man. The mimes should have an aura around him. All mimes are marked for death. Right. And you don't know what's going to kill him. Is it the fake wind? Also,

he's getting stuck in a box and suffocate. No. Maybe it is real wind. There's ghost tornadoes. He does see a little girl here in a red parker or a red slicker. From the horror. Let's just not, is what I'm going to say. Let's just not.

Don't look now. Don't try. that shit. How about that? Precisely. I mean, like, especially if your kid was not wearing any kind of red at any point, get the fuck out of here with that shit. It's so stupid. We're doing this red range. I could not believe when I took a look at this. Jaw dropping. But it's like dead central in this park. And my question is, how long, like, so if I'm going to die tomorrow, or I'm going to die five days. When does the aura start sizzling off here? There's a 48-hour aura. I think it's when you're approaching your end, right?

Within an hour. Oh, so we're talking a couple. Yeah, okay. Well, it was something about like by the day's end or something. Okay, so you mentioned somewhere? So you wake up with the aura is the idea. Pretty much. And maybe it's a thing where like the brighter it is, the closer you are to the end.

Yes, I think that's right. Because when later the hobo gets in by the train. Oh, he's glowing. He's fucking like a Christmas tree, like a Roman candle. Absolutely. That guy's ready to pop off one way or another. But yeah, so he's following these staticky noises, which is a nice mix of static and like lion roars. Remember, the ghost animals are out there too.

Yeah, that's true. We should see some fucking, you know, like dogs and monkeys and whatnot with bright white. It should be. But I guess because all religion says that actually every single animal except for us does not have a soul whatsoever. So therefore you will never see a ghost of a dog. Yeah. So stupid, which I think is bullshit. It's bullshit.

It's bullshit. Absolutely bullshit. So he goes back to the doctor and he's like, hey man, I just saw all this weird shit out in the park and the guy's like, well, your brain's fine. Nothing really to be done about that. Oh, by the way, in between scenes, someone decided I needed to be quirkier. So now I like Elvis a lot for something. Oh, right. His office, he's just watching Elvis movies or something.

Dude, you got to stay alive for the Basel Erman era, man. And this hack is like, oh, this is my life's research. Like, there's no way this dude would be in a legitimate. him in hospital, like we're told here. He's got a whole resident evil wing of the hospital with all these TVs in it. I'm like, what is this? Welcome to Raccoon City.

All in Canada, by the way. They're all up there. That's right. But like he, I think he kind of knows it's a little bit of a grift because Nathan Phileon's like, so what is all of this? He's like, I don't know. And as long as we stay not knowing, the funding keeps coming. And I was like, I don't think that's how academic research works.

As a matter of fact, if you're not producing, the funding goes away. Also, I don't think you at this hospital this time have this Lucius Fox setup you've got here with 17 fucking screens just going with all different shit. How do you fucking do you have any, is there like a nurse or anybody who knows about this? So I'd be like, yeah, all of our funding is fucking going to the ghost project upstairs. You never know when an old lady's going to scream in the static in between shops. That's what happens here, right? They zoom in on this Elvis footage and like some. old ladies screaming.

It was probably just the audience member. Someone excited for help us. I would like to imagine downstairs is the pit. And they're just like, we don't have any beds. We've got no beds to put these people in. No, you can send them back. Oh, shit, a network outage. Oh, because they're running the ghost computers too hard.

You know, we can put like seven beds in that room. No, no. It's the EVP wing. Nothing's going on in the way. Robbie's got like his head and his hands like, and you just hear it from the back. You ain't nothing but a house. trying all the time.

Get all this stuff out of here. You've got to get this out of my room. What are you doing in here? Come on now. Get this out of here. Take that up to the EVP room. We can't have this down here. Get some of my nurses back from lunch.

This is ridiculous. Sorry, darling. I heard you, you heard ghosts through your TV. I need you to go in the special EVP room. I'm going to take you very seriously here in the EVP room. I'm not allowed to legally leave you alone in the EVP room. So I'm going to be with you the whole time. You tell me about the little old lady you saw on the end.

Elvis movie. And Chris, this is where we get the Elvis song, but it's slowed down. It's like, you know, creepy and haunted. Oh, yeah. Right? Just in the, he shots of the empty hospital wing and this like, nothing but it. Yes.

Right. It's so much better. So much better. I like that. We figured it out. We did. No, no, Abbott, you can't shoot ghosts. Okay. So he's telling

So this command center that he's got is basically The Fat Guy from Ace Ventura 2 Has this in the first one And then Michael Keaton winds up like building his own As it becomes more obsessed with it as the idea And yeah he's like Here's all these detuned TVs It's a thing where like

You're 2007 TVs aren't doing the thing that you need them to do To make this movie work anymore No the signal is different Yeah the whole white noise concept is Dungo And so it's like we got to Like, I detuned this TV. Sure.

All right, man. But, yeah, he does see one spooky ghosts. I go, that's kind of fun. And do you think there was, like, more ghosts back when, like, now that these TVs don't do this as much, like our TVs now, you can't, you don't really put them on static the way it used to be. Do ghosts stop trying to communicate through that then? I think they gave up.

I think so. Yeah. Guess we got to get on TikTok now. I don't know how to do that. Oh, yeah. You get better learn to dance, ghost. Dancing, dancing, cooking video, movie preview,

white noise static. Oh my God, a ghost. Maybe we should be going to China. Maybe we're making more of using China. Also, honestly, guys, listen, AI is the future. We got to get into, I don't want to do it any more than you, but we're going to get into ghost AI.

The Bell Air Direct app includes crash assist, which detects an accident the moment it happens, and even offers you emergency assistance at the tap of a button. Okay, but what if I don't have an accident? Well, just keep on keeping on. Bell Air Direct. Insurance, simplified. Conditions apply. Kevin, stop bringing up CB radios.

We're not going back to those. Nobody fucking uses them anymore. No one's going to hear us out there. Idiot, Kevin. It doesn't look like shit. It doesn't, okay? He's what, 12 weirdos out on the highway to hear us. That's not cool, Kevin.

A.I would impress them. All those ghosts born in like 1990. Yeah, oh wow, pretty impressive. Oh, look at that. Well, I don't have to think about making my own grocery list anymore. Wow, the future is great. Oh, my God. Are people doing that?

Oh, of course they are. Yeah, hey, smart fridge, look and tell me what I need and have AI make a grocery list for me because I can't function as a fucking adult. Cool, AI is excellent. It's convincing all these people to kill themselves, making more ghosts for us. Oh, perfect. Oh, another wacky detail about this doctor, so you know he's real fun. He's wearing a ring that says T.

because this guy's taking care of business. Don't fucking worry about it. That's an Elvis thing, TCB. What is that? That was the slogan, TCB taking care of. Oh, that was an Elvis. Oh, Jesus. I thought it was a fucking BTL rep.

Oh, Elvis was taking care of business, yeah. Oh, really? See, I know nothing about Elvis. I don't have anything against Elvis. It's just a, I don't know anything. I don't know that my brother-in-law is really into Elvis, and he's got TCB everywhere. So he's just, he's an interesting.

That's cool. So, yeah, he's wearing this ring that is also Elvis, affiliated. But yeah, so he's like, so Abe is telling him, this is what's going on, this is what I'm seeing this, and the other thing. And the dude is just like, oh, well, I think this is where our connection to the first movie

ends, my friend. Because you are just a conduit for the stuff that my little Elvis TV is doing. I thought like when this stuff was popping off towards the end, this guy would come back and bring Elvis ghosts. Oh, wow. Through the TV, Elvis comes out. That would be awesome. Right. Has anyone

seen the Boslerman concert film? It's supposed to be a lot of fun. Not yet. I do want to see it. It looks really cool. Yeah. You got to get to theaters to do it or else it's kind of not the, you know, that's the whole point. Yeah, no, I know. Yeah. It doesn't work at home? I would imagine not, right? Oh, it works. It works. But I mean, to see it like on IMAX would be pretty cool. Right. But so he he leaves this hospital. He sees, by the way, you should point out our big fat party animal doctor here. He himself is glowing. Oh, yeah. So then like he leaves and he goes back and talks to Marty for like two seconds. Nothing's seen. Ben just immediately goes back to the hospital.

This is terribly edited movie. Goes back to the hospital. It's supposed to be the next day. And he's like, oh, I'm here to see doctor taking care of business. And the lady, like the nurse starts crying. And this dude, like, dropped out of a heart attack that very night. Both Elvis fans do, yeah. Sat down on that toilet and checked out for good.

Having one of those sandwiches, right? What was that? Peanut butter, bacon, lard, table scraps. Dog food. Old cigarette butts. I think it was banana. bacon, peanut butter, and then you fried it.

It's crazy that that guy died young. No, he didn't. That's a secret. A pill-popping fucking obese man couldn't possibly die young. He's alive on Mars right now. I believe it in my bones. It's hot up here.

Yeah, so, you know, he sees this newspaper headline. This is what it is. He starts putting it together. He sees a newspaper headline. The woman that he saw glowing in the park was murdered in gunfire, like crossfire from a gunfight or something? Well, it is America, so.

That's completely fair, yeah. That checks out. Yeah, so he's like, I guess what if I do know if people are going to die? That sort of like sets in motion what's going on here. Then he goes for a run at night, which is when you want to go on old bridges. I mean, I guess he's still

suicidal, so it's like, you know what? He's going up there, test and fade every night. And he sees an old hobo, right? This is the next thing is the hobo. Yeah, because he quickly sees like there's a little girl. It's actually kind of a nice moment. That's a slicker. It's a slicker. It's a montage right here and he sees the girl and he's like

sad about it because he knows what it means. It's kind of a nice moment. There's the nasty bicyclist that's asking for it the whole movie. And this guy gets a lot of play as a ghost. He's like lead ghost. Because he's got a good glare. The actor's got a really memorable glaring at you.

So I think they just knew to reuse that I like the audience would recognize it. Dirty looks. And they are. They love just fucking looking down at you. Yeah. It is just a deluge of sounds. It's the lion roaring.

It's like a whale mating call. Or an old car horn. And then the EVP lifestyle. Like also coming in there. But it's really going up in these scenes. This hobo came through like a dimensional rip from like 1950. Like this is like your classic cartoon hobo from Disney time. It doesn't have a bindle.

I was. He was looking for a shopping cart. He's a shopping cart, but he's got like a floppy hat and everything. It's pretty great. But this is a funny moment because he's on this bridge

and he sees the guy and the guy is like trying to get his little cart over the tracks and he's stuck or whatever. And there's a really good Nathan Phillyan, you've got to be kidding me. He's got Aurora Barri Ellis coming out of his ass, this guy.

He really does. Like this guy is glowing out of every orifice here. It's fantastic. And wouldn't you know what? The dude's foot is caught there and he cannot get to him in time. You see this guy be decimated by this train. It's pretty great.

You don't really see anything. He just gets so bright. It like overtakes the screen and it looks like he flies away. It's like when the DeLorean goes through time. It's the blast of white light. What I think about if he gets kicked up, but then it's not high enough. So then it hits him again.

Because the way Nathan Philean's looking is he's looking down. So he saw the body clearly went back on the tracks at some point. But he's on the ground at that point. But the ghost goes up. Not like a weasel in Roger Rabbit. Oh, so it's kind of like when Brad Pitt gets hit by that car and meet Joe Blatt. Downward trajectory on the second hit. Yeah, so this dude just gets absolutely fucking rocked.

Wouldn't you just throw up if you're an Aethan Philly and just, I know you've seen a lot of death lately, but somebody getting nailed by a fucking locomotive. And the smell of that? It's got to get, you're getting some on, maybe some in your mouth possibly. A little splatted. Oh, it tastes like dead homeless guy. I'm not sure if that's the limits of Phileans' abilities versus just what the director wanted because it is, he's just really upset.

Yeah. It's just like, oh, man. Yeah. Oh. So he goes home and he wakes up thinking someone's in his house, but he's hearing more voices. And he grabs his baseball bat and I was like, you know, fight a ghost with a baseball bat,

what he's doing right here? And I think is this, this is the ghost of the homeless guy in the house? Oh, right. Oh, is it? Because a can, this can rolls out. Oh, okay. And he was like,

can bottle guy and he's like calling guard a ghostly can so would you die like your accessories as well exactly so one die a microphone's gonna like roll down the street you know what I mean exactly but yes he looks like that's a funny unmarked can in my kitchen and he turns and the guy's like brr yeah just like right why would you do that he was trying to save you blah a fun moment from Nathan phillian here because he's a funny guy picks up the phone he's like hey uh marty uh you okay uh for a visit right now and his friend's like, yeah, obviously, you're my friend that's in real trouble. So, sure, come on over. He's like, how about right freaking now?

It's just kind of funny. Yeah, totally. Like, I guess, dude, sure, come on over. So on his way there. Yep, the night is young. Dude, he just drives by this old timer trying to change a tire on this like old ass, old ass. Dude, I am not saving this old guy.

The first bit of lip I get from this guy, like, all right, have a nice night, asshole. Yeah, you know what? Go fuck yourself, sir. I'd help. It happened quicker. Like, direct the traffic into him. Because he's, I don't need. some dipshit kid telling me what to do take your metrosexual ass back to your yuppie car what

have a nice night sir yeah exactly have a sweet day enjoy hell old man see this was what 2002 seven seven back then we would say metrosexual as a big negative thing yes now it the metrosexual craze it wasn't that something it was a moment in time really was and it just meant heterosexual dudes that took care of themselves wait wait a second that's You're wearing a shirt without a mustard stain. All right. Whatever, Metro. Oh, what's that?

You shampoo in the shower, did you, your little metrossexual? What's that a belt on your pants instead of an extension cord? Okay, metrosexual. D-da, Mr. Clean Fingernails. Exactly. Oh, what's that? You fucking managed to wipe your ass and not get scutters on your underpants, Metrosexual. You're trying to lower your fucking heart disease risk by going to the gym.

Metrosexual. Exactly. Just one of the dumbest spike TV products of the time. I had a female boss call me metrosection. Wow. Because it was the one day you went to the office without mustard stains on? I guess so. What was the context?

I was, hey, metrosexual. Basically, I was sexually harassed at Lifetime. Eric's a bad of all the places. What? Of all the places to be sexually harassed in lifetime. They turned the tables. You were the wrong offices. Dude, how about that?

Did she look like Demi Moore? or was it? She looked like Debbie Les. Okay. Oh, no. Uh-huh. Lovely woman, though. Oh, yeah, lovely, love him.

Yeah. Uh-huh. So, yeah, this dude, Phileon's like, Hey, man, it looks like the car is not really on that jack too well. I'm just getting some lug nuts.

Leave me alone. I'm dropping my lug nuts under the van like any God-given Americans right to do so, motherfucker. Full tires are for metrosexuals. Flat tires are for real heterosexual men.

Oh man, you got where you were going safely, metrosexual. And he, he pulled, this guy comes up to really yell in his face. And as he's doing it, he gets rear-ended by somebody. Yes.

Which would certainly have killed him. And the world would have been a better place. I owe you my life. Yeah, he's pretty quick to see that. He does. He does look like Phil Donahue looking motherfucker. He does look like Phil Donahue, doesn't he?

The glasses and the hair. Yeah. Coming up next. EVPs. He definitely did it. Several, I would imagine. With this power, I imagine, once I figure out what's going on, I'm looking for younger. Like, people who shouldn't be dying, like a four, four-year-old, 10-year-old.

I'm following that kid around all that. I'll try to save them. No, I promise. He's going to die at some point. That's why I followed him to this playground. He's glowing. Oh, God. Kill him.

Never mind. Save Katie Stackoff. That's it. Yeah. No one else. It's a good meetkeeping her for violent rape murder. Yeah, for sure. That's right.

So, yeah, he realizes what's going on. He's like, you saved somebody's life tonight. Like, he's talking to himself in the mirror. And then in an odd move, fit for no one other than a serial killer. He makes a notch in the wooden frame of this bedroom mirror. What is that? Keep it counts. Your soul is mine.

Exactly. It's the worst line of the movie. I don't know if it's right here, but it might be right after. It's kind of like a nothing scene where he tells Marty what he could do. He's like, I can save lives. I have the power to see the future or see who's going to die. And I can stop them. And he's like, that is some superhero bullshit.

That's some Captain Tightpants stuff. Yes. Which is a reference to Firefly very directly. Like he's called that in the show. Really? Like the online. I thought that was a metrosexual thing. No, the online community loved calling Nathan Philly and Captain Tightpans.

They probably just stopped doing it last year. And now they're going to start again. That show made so many. people fucking horny. It did. Firefly? Is that right? Yeah, yeah. I never watched a second of it. I remember it being a good show. I don't care much for that Adam Baldwin. Yeah, that'll do it. Yeah, the internet toilet.

Yeah, the internet toilets all over that. I watched the first couple episodes. I'm like, this is okay. And it just never got me where it wanted. I never watched the entirety. No. I definitely watched the movie, which I thought had some good moments. People like that movie. I was always like, you know, I'll watch the show, then I'll watch the movie. I think at this point I should just watch the movie or not space pirates or some shit yeah kind of sort of

yeah okay space smugglers your Han Soloy kind of deal there's like an empire and there's like a Borgas kind of thing too yeah it's got it all oh um so yeah he's uh oh this is where he saves the bridge dude right here

he sees a dude these kids are going to hell tonight oh my god so it's it's a guy and a girl like you know kind of like probably work friends he's trying to work up the courage to ask her out kind of a deal. Yep, yep, yep, yeah. And, like, they're just standing on the side of a bridge,

many bridges in this movie. Sure. This, like, the girl is, like, kind of flady and, like, I think spills coffee on these. She, yeah, she bumps into this dude and gets her coffee all over here. And she's to Alex and his droogie. Exactly.

Seriously. And he's marauders. It's fucking crazy. Because it's like, the guy says, like, you can make this up to me right now, pick up some overtime in my hotel room. Yeah, totally, because she says something about, like,

I got to get back to work. Let me make this up to you some way. Yeah, oh, overtime. And it's like, grabbing at her. Yeah. And this guy's like, hey, man, let's just not rape a woman in public in the middle of this. How do you get your damn hand? Stop them!

And they start stomping this guy. And then they try to throw him over the bridge, throw his whole body. They're trying to murder this guy for trying to help this girl. Amazing. Like, this is a level of shit-kickery. These are just a couple of guys walking down the street that are casual. wanting to commit rape and murder. In broad daylight.

They're not even like, two o'clock in the afternoon. They're not even like, you know, which would be old hat, but like if they were in biker gear or something, oh, those are bikers. Look out for, they're just regular looking guys. Yeah. Or if they were in like all white suits with the codpiece on the outside. Just normal looking dudes. These guys and things.

It's just like jeans and t-shirt guys. Like 20-year-old guys. So Phileon runs up and tries to like interview. They throw this dude over the side anyway. And then Phileon is like reaching down to save him is the ordeal. He does like get him back up.

The lesson of the movie is you should have let this guy be thrown off this overpass by these guys and die. Because he might maybe go evil in three days. Because you're interfering with death's plan. This is the final destination of it all. That I guess is my question. Is it something, does it have to be that where I see the light or if like,

I don't know if me and Eric are walking and Eric's not paying attention, I just, oh, hey man, you were about to get hit by a bus. Right. Pull him back. three days I will commit murders. That's my question. You know what I mean? I think it's anytime, oh man, that egg would kill you with cholesterol, like three days later.

Right. Yeah. Well, yeah, maybe it's based on like the guarantee that it's going to happen in that moment maybe or something like that. Sure. Or if you're possessing the cheat code of seeing the light, maybe that's the problem. You've got to learn to button up even if it is like right there. You know, you're about to be sideswise by a bus. Like, I just got to let it happen.

You see God's plan a little bit. You're looking at the next page. You're not supposed to do that. So after saving that, dude, we are back to the fucking dresser, and he's just got notch number two, and he goes, playing God for another day. What the fuck, dude? Notching on me.

You know what? He's also jacking in it and reveling in it. Probably. This is psychosexual shit. Tonight, it's a meat lover is for me. I've earned it. I've earned it today. Two lives still on the block.

Oh, there's a shine on me. mirrors. All right, one less slice. Meat likers. I'll have a meat likers. So he goes back to the hospital. I think to check in on the kid. The kid. And he asks Marty to meet him at the hospital just to give him the file and like all the information on what happened to his family. Yeah, because Marty's been holding on to it. I think there might be a drop line. I think their job is something to do with the news. It has to be right with this file. Yes.

Because he says he's been like saving all of these clippings and any reference to the events or whatever. But it's like a, but it's laid out like the office in Brazil. Just a bunch of people of typewriters. With paper everywhere. There's paper flying through this room. I'd like to see some person disappear in a newspaper. Yes. That's sort of ghostly.

It's quite ghostly. So he starts hearing like things over the hospital, PA and he's like, oh, another person's in danger. And I was like, if there was ever a location where you shouldn't have to really concern yourself with your ghost life-saving powers, it's out of hospital. Yeah, exactly. Like that doctor knows what's going on with that heart attack. You don't need to intervene there. Well, maybe it's a bad doctor, you know? I guess that's true.

But this is where he follows Katie Sack off. There's a bad elevator scare that does nothing. It's like, ah, I'm an elevator. The door opens just another ghost there for no reason. He's like, all right, noted. Thank you. I'll be on my way here. Yes, it's a spooky lady.

jumps out of the elevator, you're right. But yeah, so he follows her down or whatever, and this is where she is attacked by this dude who's waiting. Like, she sees a van with the door already open. And you're like, rut row. Need help moving a couch. Yeah, exactly. And then this dude attacks, and this is going on.

Phileon intervenes right here. But this dude just, like, gets away. Yeah. Never mentioned again. There's no police report file. Oh, they caught him. I got his wallet. His name is whatever, yeah.

If only hospitals had camera. all over them. Oh man, it would be great. When will they learn? The fight with this, like Phileon does kind of have a good fight with this. Sure. That's like kind of the only like sort of worthwhile thing.

She takes him back upstairs to fix him up. And she goes from fun and flirty to nuclearly horny. Absolutely. It's an upgrade. And we are sharing grief tales here because she mentions how she is a widow. Her husband has recently died of, you assume it's, you know, some sort of prolonged disease or whatever. It's a heart attack and he was working on this Elvis project.

Oh, man. You were married to that guy? Oh, man. Yeah. What? We have to end this conversation. Right. It's like if she dated Newman type of thing. Well, he really did take care of business, didn't he? Well, no, she was married to Jack Black in the School of Rock, it seems. Yes, yes. It's like, oh, he's a music teacher, but he like, cool stuff.

Yeah, he was always having them, yeah, do like pop music and rock tunes in the choirs, the recitals or whatever. And she's like, and I still do it every year to memorialize him or whatever. And I was like, that's kind of weird. She gives him a flyer, which is like, come on the fuck, man. Let's do it's just flyer for fucking. And I think for Katie Sackoff, this is like, she's in the middle of doing Battlestar Galactica. It's very Starbucks, Starbucks, Starbucks.

This is like opposite of Starbucks. I'm a fun and flirty nurse and not... Because Starbuck was like a serious... Serious brassy cigar smoke and punching dudes out. This is not that character. She's very much like, I could do other stuff, baby. He goes home... Oh, the big thing from that whole kerfuffle

is the anniversary present was broken. The watch was busted. So he goes home and puts that... It's like his collection of lives saved notches. And then a photo of the dead wife and child and he hangs the watch on the photograph as like, it's your problem now, honey,

the presence's broken, I guess. I also don't know how that watch is staying up. It's on a mirror and like, it's just hanging off a photograph. Yeah, I don't know either. The weight of it. The wife's hand is holding it. Sure.

Then he's also still watching the wife footage. He's watching home movies. This is where he gets the, because like the kid is filming. Dude, the kid gets a brutal burn on him in this. Oh, that's right. He's like, hey, dad, you're fucking short. The mom's like, is daddy short?

Like, yeah, dad's fucking short. Yes. And then Nathan Philly had clearly heard is like, well, short people have thicker skin because it's not stretched out. Oh, wow, I didn't even remember that. Yes, dude, it's brutal. And I'm like, if you think Nathan Filian is short, wait till you get a load of me. Now, son, I'm a short king. You understand that, a short king.

You listen to me. It's the motion in the ocean. What does that mean, Dad? Shut up. Was this kid blind, though? Nathan Philly on this tall as far. Yeah, he's a famously tall, handsome man. I thought, I thought.

Yeah, you think I'm sure, kid? Well, you know what I did? I fucked your mother. How about that? How about that? I might do it tonight, too. This kid just starts crying. No.

But in these tapes is also, the kid is filming in the backseat. It's actually some more dad ballbusting because it's like, oh, yeah, here's this present or whatever that you got dad. Does he know what it is? Maybe not, because he's a fucking moron or whatever. And whatever that is going on, they're about to drive. through an intersection, this guy comes, the guy who murdered them comes out of nowhere and throws himself on the windshield and's like, no, stop. And then a car blows through. They would have

been teaboned and killed. Like, thank God your kids filming every second of life. Exactly. Exactly. And this was, this was a little bit before the like fucking family YouTube blogging living life on the live stream. Are there family YouTube blogs? Oh, dude, what? I can start looking at family. Dude, there are. Yes, you can. There's a whole. Yes, you can. the red dragon. I'm going to say manhunter. Thank you. I'm going to eat a William Blake painting and pick a family at random.

Get some dude in a wheelchair, set him on fire, throw him down a hill, the whole deal. Yes. No, there is a whole, Eric, there is a whole cottage industry of parents who put their entire family's lives on YouTube to make money off. I can watch it all. I have this image of Eric getting in a tree to watch families. God damn it. If there was a better way I could watch families than peeping through fucking. Windows.

Oh my God. Well, I had no idea. There's even documentaries about that shit going horribly wrong. Of course. Because it would have to. How could that go wrong? Well, they turn into the Red Dragon themselves. You don't even need outsiders coming in.

Yeah. So then he's like, oh, what the fuck? Like, he has a freak out because he, like, he has a supercomputer where he could like screen grab this guy's face. This is some fuffa, fake technology. You just don't have this at your fingertips in 2000. am I wrong? He's doing like, he's actually even doing like touch screen stuff too later with it. Am I not?

I don't remember any touch screen stuff. Oh, no, I'm mistaken that with him. I remember him just being like, here's the outline of this face. And now computer search the internet for this face. Enhance. And then he also. A lot of enhance. And then the computer, uh, use the Patriot Act to cross-references with every ID.

And he has like a shit freak out and all the printed pages start coming out. And it's this dude's face all over and over again. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Um, he's also getting like. electrocuted by screens here and there. There's an old lady ghost. Like she comes out of the computer screen and like electrocutes him and he's like kind of having like a ghost heart attack for a second.

They never marry the EVP stuff, which is white noise with the light. You know what I mean? It's white noise and the light. Not white noise and colon the light. Right. So he goes to see the widow of this dude that murdered his family. Oh, Jesus. It's today. I knew it was going to happen.

She's like already like waiting for him. Like, yeah, what took you? long kind of a deal. And, you know, she explains, oh, Henry, the husband here that killed your family. He also had a near-death experience. He died through four times on a table that night, like before they brought him back or whatever. And then after the events of that, he thought he had this kind of precognition.

He thought that he could save people. It was just Nathan Philean being like, oh, this is my movie too. Yes. He started having weird theory, weird ideas of life and death. Sure. Yep, that sums it up perfectly, actually. Did he finally get over it all and then have sex with a lot of hot women afterwards? What happened to the fellow?

Oh, no. Oh, no, he's alive? Yeah, that's the whole fucked up thing. So we learned that this guy came to believe if you save somebody's life, you're responsible for it, which is a real fucking fortune cookie message. So did he not know that the guy that killed his family, and then survived. You did not know that he survived.

He did not know that the guy's incredible. Isn't he like institutionalized? Probably for the crime of killing your family. Yes, legally. Did you not follow your own family's fucking murder? Well, that's the whole weird thing is how he's been telling this Marty friend. Like, I don't want to see any of the stuff just collect it for me for later. So like maybe he has successfully like put his head in the sand that hard, I guess.

It was easier to unplug, I guess. Yeah, no, that's true. He's also, it's your classic movie trope of like, here's the creepy big room. I'm the owner of the house. You just go in there and do whatever you want. Because I don't want to be associated with this crazy shit. If you want to take the whole room out at this point, I don't care yet. Take whatever you want.

I do like, and again, it's for a different eerier movie. But when he's doing the research right here and all the monitors start turning on and all the dust covers all like fall off on their own, that's kind of a nice little spooky scary thing for a different movie. late for Bible shit in this movie? There's a ton of Bible shit coming at you. All of a sudden I'm seeing him with this Bible and I'm just like, what? No, not now. No, no, no, no. I also didn't, I didn't appreciate the Laces Outpost or I thought that was bad taste.

But yeah, so he goes to see this dude, Henry Kane is the name of this character. Nice fake name. Yes, big time. And he's in this institution. And this guy is like, oh, you're here to see Henry Kane. You know, the weird guy. He sees dead people. And this guy's doing, oh, you remember that movie from a few years ago?

Well, this guy's the real deal. And he's also got the line like, yeah, this guy's never going to see the second inside of a courtroom. He's crazy forever. No, they usually have the court case no matter what, even if he is bug nuts crazy. Well, if you're not standing trial, though, it's not the same kind of case. I don't know if they'd bring him there. But I guess just to say, like, he won't be tried for it. Sorry, Mac, he ain't going to be tried for killing your family, you see.

He's too nuts. So they just have this thing and it's this guy and wouldn't you know it? Half of his fucking face is blown off. He puts this gun underneath his chin and you see stuff. It goes against the ceiling of the diner. Yeah.

Well, you know, that was an extra stuff he didn't need. Yeah, a hole in his brain. Not a big deal. Yeah, that's fine. But he basically says like you can't shut these voices out. If you save somebody, you're responsible for them.

You have to stop there. Save must kill. If you save, you must kill. If you save, you must kill. I don't think that's right. I mean, I'm not saving anybody. So now, no, no. So now Nathan Phelian has to think he has to go and kill people he's saved. Is this around the time we see what happens with the old man with the VW?

Yes. Well, that happens when she drops by the house. Katie Sackoff comes by the house. She's like, you want some bad wine? And he's like, oh, I guess I have to have sex with Katie Sack. He was all like, I'm married actually, so no, it's like, come on, dude. She's like, hey, man. You're not married.

You're not, you know, come on. Come on. Come on. But hey, let's do, you know, we'll be partners. I'm in grief, you're in grief. They have a nice little drink on the water kind of a thing. How does she know where he lives, by the way? I think we're peeking through some records, aren't we?

She's that thirsty, dude. And the bad wine joke, we keep doing, this wine is really bad. And wine is bad. And she says something about like, I'm, uh, I paid like $2.50 for it. I was like, first of all, like, that's not real. Like, that's not an act. That's never, no, no, no.

But like, can we stop? Like, how bad could it be? You're not drinking Pruno by the river here. And also, like, if you're trying to, you know, just if you're trying to get this guy's attention, put some effort into it. Spend 20 bucks on a good bottle of wine. Exactly.

Maybe come over with some tequila. You know, I don't know. Pull a supernova, get some pear brandy in there. First, you know, you can drink this bad wine together. Then you can drink my pussy up. You can drink it right off. That is a fine fine wine right there. Yeah, of course.

But then we go to two buck chocolate. No, it's not. We go to a bar, another bar, and now this is some sexy pool playing here. Oh, my God, dude, is it not? She's like, oh, nice shot. And she's like caressing his hand on the counter of the table. You know, that felt good. Absolutely.

It's some sexy shit. You want to see white lights? You want to see a white light? what does that mean but she kisses him in this moment and it's nice and then she's just like oh I'm sorry like that was inappropriate

or whatever and he's he's kind of like wishy-wash on it but then it doesn't matter because he sees the TV and he sees that dude's ugly as orange VW bus has intentionally rammed into an entire bus stop full of people good Lord and it's like he's put

his coat on. He's like, I got to go. And she's like, what did you know somebody? He's like, yeah, I did. I got to go. Yeah, I knew him. Like, what are you going to do? What are you going to do? Put the people back together? She can try, I guess. She could do it better than you. She's a doctor. This is all on just, it's an accident. It was an accident. I didn't mean to save that. I thought I was doing good. Oops. Now I know from now on. That's all I can do. What am I going to do? Do you want to interrupt the first time you've been hard in a month? Exactly. That's not. I don't think that's a good idea, fella. It's a special moment. But so he goes home and it's, there is so much fucking computer research in this movie. The first one has it also. But like he goes home and he finds out that he looks up the names of all the people that the guy saved. Because it's like two other people or something and then his wife and son. Apparently one of the people that the guy saved is, this is time to be trivia. The woman at the end of the first white noise that he saves, which I don't even remember.

He's a Carrie Wur's character. something like that. I think she's in that movie. But what knows another character that he just sort of saves at some point in the movie and it's like, oh, that's the connection to Michael Keaton, which no one would remember. No. I disagree. Right. You're saying it's a woman from the first movie is a name

on that list. Yes, but it's not Carrie Wirher. Oh, it's not? Or whoever, or it's Deborah Carrunger, I believe. Oh, is it Debrickette? Those two actresses are interchangeable. But either way, it's not that woman. It's just some other lady. Yes, it's some other lady. Who cares? I just want to be clear. It's stupid. Wow. But, yeah, so they all.

freaked out and they all committed crying. You see like what's going on like the one, the old lady, you see like footage of her, like she just like murdered her husband or something like that. Oh, he deserved the... And it's, you know, he flashes back to the Henry Kane meeting

and it's all this stuff about Jesus rose on the third day. But this is great. It goes to Phileana and he's talking to himself and he's like, well, Jesus rose on the third day, but what about the devil? What did he do on the third day? And I was like, what are we doing? And No.

Was Jesus evil in the third day? I don't know. Was you walking around, like, killing people? You fucked up a bus stop? I don't know the adventures of Jesus after he came out of the cave. I don't know what we do. Are you going to find out next year, buddy? You fucking buy your ticket now.

I can't wait for him to come back and tell us. Oh, man. Oh, no, I meant the resurrection of the crisis. Oh, yeah, I know. Then I could finally have a conversation with the gentleman. Oh, that's what the Mel Gibson movie is about? It's called the resurrection of the price. Oh, I think you meant to the resurrection of the Christ.

the Armageddon. I just thought you were making a world as ending because everything's terrible. Oh, no. Either way you want it. Oh, it's a fiction one. Yeah. Okay, cool. Oh, it's called the resurrection of the Christ.

And it's a two-part movie. I don't know how you get two parts out of fucking one day or whatever. Well, see, the first movie, you see. You're rolling that stone back. It takes a while. That's what it is. The first movie ends. The stone finally is rolled all the way back.

Boom. Resurrection Part 2 coming out. So he's not resurrected until the end of the first movie. Real scam, you see. And that hand you see pushing the rock. Wouldn't you believe it? It's Mel Gibson's hand. Oh, cool.

That's the real one right there. I am kind of curious to see it. Of course, everyone does. Oh, yeah. He does all this bullshit, Bible mumbo-jumbo, Mark of the Beast, 666, all that. Bingo bingo. Well, he's doing some numerology here.

There's some zodiac cipher decoding going on. Yeah, okay, man. I fucking listen to Iron Maiden, too. You don't got to fucking pretend like it's a big deal here. The worst part of this movie is flourish where on one side of discreet it's Nathan Philean's face and on the other side it's Henry Cade and I'm like Whoa what are we doing that is a

Very hilarious shot and that Should only exist if the movie's Trying to tell you Phileon's Abe character is being possessed by this dude Yes that's what those kinds of shots are for Like we're now sharing a psychology or something like that Well presumably he could have had two near death experiences now This other guy maybe he does have the power to possess a little bit

Maybe that would be something to do And you have to stop him or something that's kind of have fun. Literally anything, man. Literally anything but reading things off computer screens, which again is 80% of this movie. Oh, maybe this original, before they turned it into White Noise 2, maybe the original script was actually

the three from adaptation. Oh, yes. And it was just the killer's switching out. Ooh, hell yeah. It's me, but it's not me. They're all the same person. So it turns out now it has been three days since he saved

Bridge Kid. Yeah. He gets Sherry to give this kid's info to him. He finds that he works at this hotel. This kid, by the way, I looked it up just to see, like, if he had done anything, we encountered this guy in previous episode, Russell Madness. He plays the father of the young boy. Congratulations. That's amazing.

Yeah. Congrats. Absolutely. I think he's been in a couple of other Russell and fun dog movies. That's another directed DVD staple, you know what I mean? A dog movie. Talk a dog. Airbud and those kinds of things.

I think there's a Santa, the buddies. Yeah, Santa buddies. All that stuff. Satan buddies. Satan buddies. It would stand to reason there should be a Satan buddies. There should be a bunch of dogs around Halloween. Yes.

Cerebus. It's done. It's all there. Oh, right. Yeah. That's a good dog. Good boy. Three-headed, cute little guy there.

Yeah. Guard the entrance to hell. Why not? So he stops at the bus stop, like where the accident happened. there's still like it's kind of funny that the city has not gotten rid of this yet there's just blood all over the place still and he's like well this must be it's not like there's no tape around it it's just there yeah there's no caution there's nothing it's just a destroyed bus stop I kind of want someone standing in the blood being like and the bus is still running

I just I just this is my stop I this is how I get home from work it's the 12 limited I know that the stop's covered in blood but this it is going to stop right here it will be here I called the dispatch they will be coming And when he stops, this is where he's, all the ghosts of the people that got killed here are like yelling at him and they're like kill, kill, kill, kill. What assholes? I know. Come on. Like, what are you?

Salty because you got killed? Yeah, exactly. Like now everyone has to die because you're dead. Also, maybe if you want them to do this revenge thing, maybe do it kind of more like, avenge us. Yes. Pause. Not kill. That's something.

Yeah. You know, listen, ghosts. You attract more flies with honey. Maybe you start with a compliment. Or how about a hell? How are you doing? I don't mean to frighten you in the middle of the night, but, you know, you're not short at all anyway. Could you please help us?

A nice little spoonful of sugar. It doesn't hurt any bright. That's this piss and vinegar these ghosts are given. That's it. So best sequence in the movie, we get to this hotel where this guy Kurt works as a piano player in the lounge. The possessing freak out starts happening. You can see he's more aggressively pounding on the piano keys. Down with the sickness.

He's really Richard cheesing it up. And you can see these security guards like, he's playing a little too loud there, is he not? They go over and sort of stop him and he like slams his fists down on the keys. You don't need to go with Dave Brubeck's late stuff. Okay, that's it's good enough. Unfortunately, his work flirts are also working that day and that's a tough one. That's there.

And so this dude, Kurt, like, pulls a gun out right here. And Abe gets to the hotel and he can see, he can't see the people, but he can see the light. So there's hovering above. He's like, well, they must be up there. Well, with all that flashing white light up. That's a lot of flashing light up. Fuck.

Oh, boy. Oh, fuck. That's at least three people up there. God damn. This gets hilarious real fast. It's so funny because they get up there. There's a whole struggle. This dude also just utters Trey Amera in this moment.

And then pushes himself off of this piano through the glass barricade. He goes down. Security Guard goes down. Lady Friend goes down. What's that loony tune? piano goes down. You just see all of these people crushed by a huge piano.

Man, this is great. It's a fucking great sequence. It rocks, dude. This is the most final destination he this movie gets. It's so good. It's even like he's, it looks like Nathan Phyllian saves the days.

You're okay, kid, you're okay. Yeah, because the guy, Kurt doesn't go over. Yes, because then and then he just does this thing. And then he says, I don't think you should have saved me, which is kind of like, which is crazy, like, what? I don't know.

So you know. So you know. You know that you're going to kill people now because of you're being saved? It's all my fault, apparently. It's those fucking bullies fault that were going to kill you that day. Apparently, those guys are fine. They're normal, totally decent people. Can we go to fucking club mullochore and get those guys down to a police station and see what they have to say about the incident, please? So, yeah, this guy is like, I don't think you should save me. Now, do I, is this a thing I wished had happened in the movie or does this actually happen?

he grabs the gun back and kills himself? No, he does not. I think he tries to grabs the gun. He grabbed out of this. Now it's Philly and his gun. You get him, the Kurt looks down and sees the girl and it's just dead eyes and then her mouth opens the piano keys. But other than that. So he realized at this point, shit, man, according to the notches on my mirror, there's only one person left that I've saved that hasn't freaked.

out and that is sexy nurse sherry so we got to go and it's got to be 730 because I remember the time now and it's exactly three days yeah oh because the watch stopped at the point where the mugging happened or whatever brilliant but dude it is he does have an at home freak out writer him

smashing this mirror is pretty funny he's had enough to hear with these premonitions that's bad love all right that's it wife murderer you got to help me there is a woman I want to have sex with but I also saved her what am I supposed to do wife murderer. That is a pickle

isn't dead? Tremara. Meanwhile, and again, a guy who's doing the Lord's work, apparently, serial killer guy is just picking up ladies and killing them all throughout Northern Canada. Nobody cares about that guy. No, no, no, no. He's doing his own thing, man. Him and the droogies. They might, actually,

that might be a new suicide squad. Oh, the four of them, yeah. All together. This is where we get some shit kind of straight out of Peter Jackson's. The Frighteners, Philions driving the car here. And then, oh my God, I got a bike. But it's the ghost guy and he goes through the car.

Yeah. And again, turns around and gives him a real nasty. Fuck you look. These fucking ghosts, you need an attitude adjustment. I agree. It's not my fault. Eternity, you're going to look like that? Seriously.

Well, how about some serenity? You know what I mean? Thank you. Yes. Let's put that movie on and relax. Even space smugglers and relax. Even that, like in the frighteners, they look grotesque. But they've come to.

terms with it. They know who they are. They don't got a problem with it. Because if something's forever, you're going to be used to it pretty quick. Yeah. That movie's so fun. I love that movie. Oh, really? It's a fun time. You should do that eventually. Yeah, oh, absolutely. It would be kind of like a right down the middle. It doesn't matter what feet it's on sort of title, but it's a fun one. I love that movie. It's a good one. So, Abe shows up at the school where the big recitals happening that night and we go in and all of these ghosts are appearing in front of it. You're going to go killer, right? You're

gonna kill her, right? You're going to the school to kill her, right? The kids are playing Rush because this movie is filmed in Canada. Oh, was that the tune? You got a real discount. Yeah, you got a real discount in Canada. Getty Lee was like, no, it's free, man. Cool. Canadian production, it's totally free. Can you see a birth certificate? Oh yeah, you're good to

go, brother. I seize the little red girl ghost. P.U. Not allowed. It's the same thing. She's like skittering around. But what is this, though? Who is this the ghost of? Schindler's list.

No, it's just when he's walking around the street, he sees a little girl at a red slicker. Yeah. The light is on. The ghost of that. Yeah, so it's just like,

she eventually died. He decided not to save the young. So you're damned, if you do, if you're damn, you know, these fucking assholes are up my ass no matter what. Why is this,

wait a second, though, but like, she's a nosy little precocious kid now. But it's, why is she not just fucking blue and gray like the rest of them? Why is the slickers still red?

So you remember her. Because it don't look now is a good movie, you understand? It's 1970s. But then they all should be, like, the bicycle messenger should just look like the guy. You know, that's fucking bullshit. Yeah, you're right. It is more Schindler's List you than not, Eric.

A weird choice. I mean, you know, what is, 94? Yeah. I mean, I guess, I don't know. I was thinking Schindler's list the entire time seeing this girl in the red. Yeah. It could be a reference to either thing. Or neither movie, as a matter of fact.

I just think you shouldn't do it. I agree. I fully agree. I'm there with you. How about a yellow slicker? That's more common anyway. Easy piece. But so he makes a scene here.

He gets kicked out of the school immediately because he like, he starts getting rough with Katie Sack. He's like, you got to listen to me, you're in danger, blah, blah, blah, blah. She freaks out. And then like these two buff dudes, I guess it's like school security or whatever. Jazzy Jeff, this motherfucker right out of the school. Well, no, they've been like I and Katie Sackoff for a while. Oh, man, this guy's getting rough with her.

Oh, no. He's harassing the widow Carruthers. she was mine, get over here. Whatever her fucking name is in this movie. But yeah, so, like, he's getting kicked out, and then he sees all these ghosts that get, like, on a receiving line, like, oh, we'll die, oh, may die, whatever. And then he was driving around and notices, he's following her, stalking her, obviously. He gets into stalker mode right here, definitely.

He's going to follow her and kill her or whatever. And he's like, oh, no, no, no, no, no, she's going into the blood diner. Yeah, totally, here we go back to Blood Diner. It would be great if he even was like, that place is still open. I would have The health code violations You have specials? It's only been three months

They really cleaned up My family's murders seen nicely And this I cannot believe It's the same waitress It's crazy That's so funny I didn't even notice that detail Oh my God, it's great

But yeah So like Abe then now sees the white light On himself And he's like Oh fucking finally I will be dead And she's already put together What's going on

And she's like Okay I'm the only one left that you saved, I get it now. She, you know, she forgives him and everything and accepts this without them having a conversation about what's going on, which is annoying.

She has just sat at this diner and figured it out really quickly. And then he just... Disco fries immediately. Immediately. Honestly, if you're going, you might as well. Extra gravy. And then he just pulls out a gun because he's going to like murder her right there. And then the waitress

is like, that guy's got a gun. Again. Two cops that are eaten there, stand. up and like, sir, you know, that whole that whole thing. And he just goes, you have to die. And he goes to shoot her and they shoot the shit out of him. He goes down.

And it's so funny because he goes down, she drops down with him. They have this whole long moment. They're having exchanges back and forth and back and forth. And I was like, the cops that just blew this guy away are like three feet over there.

It takes them this. They have a whole scene and then the cop runs over. like, hey lady, it's all right, get out? And I was like, what did you go to the bathroom before you checked in on this? Ma'am, you're not supposed to make out with the corpse. We frown upon that. It's a crime sheet now, sweet. And then, like, this end thing with the ambulance is the craziest fucking thing I've ever seen.

It's fucking insanity. So, like, it turns 730. She's still alive. Him being killed has not mattered. That hasn't, like, broken the line or anything like that. She starts, like, having the freak out of the ambulance, I think, is the idea. And this is the worst ambulance driver. I think what they teach you.

Watch the road, man. Exactly. Like, whatever's going on in the back, you as the ambulance driver, your job is just to keep your eyes on the road and go to the hospital. Precisely. Because he's like, what's the ruckus back there? I'm like, fucking eyes forward, asshole. My chuckle, man.

Then, like, Nathan Phelian, as a ghost comes in and starts, like, ghost murdering her. Well, he goes to the power line, you understand. Right. E.P. Yes, sir. Yeah. He's electric gremlin. It's very electric gremlin.

in this moment, you're totally right. And he appears there to, like, stop her heart through his hand or something? Yes, which apparently a ghost can do. Okay. I guess, yeah, it's like a calm. I thought it was like a calming her down to stop the freak out or whatever. I thought he was killing her. I am no idea.

I have no idea. So as he calms her down slash kills her, then he teleports in front of the ambulance, right, to prevent it, question mark, from hitting a flammable truck. So it slivers. Yeah. There's also a bus next to a flammable truck. That's clear. Two guys move in a plate of glass.

There's a woman with a baby carriage crossing the street. It was just cans. It's very clear what's about to happen. Exactly. And again, this guy keeps me like, what is going on back there? I'm like, dude, stop it. He has done, I think I just recognize in my notes what you're talking about with killing her. He does, you're right, he does a straight up force pushes her soul out of the body.

Which is, but it's like nicer because she sees her boyfriend or her husband or whatever. And then he's like, damn it. Fuck, son of a. bitch. I was hoping he'd be downstairs. Are you guys open? At all? But yes, and then he goes in front of the ambulance.

The ambulance swerves. So it hits neither thing and doesn't cause the explosion that would kill the people in the bus. And then all of our ghost friends are there to wish of a good job well done? Job well dead. It's like a fucking round of applause. Thanks for whatever. I mean, we're already ghosts or whatever. Welcome to limbo.

we're going to be here forever. Hope you like the outfit you were buried. You were buried in because that's it. That's a pretty good tray, Amer. And then it just ends with Phileon getting zipped up in this body bag, a shot that's so awkward because it doesn't even look like Nathan Phileon. I had to

pause it. I was like, who is this person now? Well, when you die, you look a little different. And then he goes up to heaven, right? Or he sees his family again, right? Is he with them? Did I miss that? I don't think so. He gets dragged to hell by demons. You just see him getting wrapped up in the body bag and then it goes to Henry Kane at the Looney bin.

The Henry Kane callback, nobody cares. And he just gets attacked by a bunch of ghosts and that's the end of the movie. Because also we realized not to be whatever, but Henry Kane was a hero for murdering that woman and boy because they would have killed everyone in the diner. So why does he deserve to have punishment? Because the devil, you know, 666 and the signature of the beast and whatnot.

I just mean from the movie's perspective. Oh, it doesn't know. No, no. It has absolutely no idea what's going on, man. You're right. It's funny that you brought that up, though. There is no, he's reunited with the, there's absolutely none of that. He's zipped up in a body bag and that's the end of the movie for him.

I'm just thinking, like, the suicide attempt and then he's saved by the friend. Shouldn't he go crazy in three days and kill? I guess he gos by studying this stuff. He goes nuts and starts trying to kill people because of the saving thing. Well, Marty, no, but Marty doesn't have the gift. I think the saving thing is only happening if you use the cheat code of being able to see the light. I just don't know. It makes a ton of sense.

It doesn't hold water. No, really in white noise too, it doesn't hold water. Doesn't hold holy water. That is the end of this movie. We'll go around the horn for some final thoughts. Mr. Siska. It's a good time. No, get the lads together.

When was the last time you hung out with your bloke? You got to see the lads. Get some beers with the lads, the mates over. The mates, the whatever. else. And I feel like this would be a fun group experience. I never heard of this before. I was surprised by the actors in it. I did, you know, that they were people I would recognize. Right. It's very surprising. Not often the case in these directed DVD sequels. And it's pretty fun in terms of the stupid, the stupidness of it, the how in your face it is with it.

Yeah. I actually had a pretty good time with it. I don't know. There you go. Chris Cabin. No, but a very mild no. Because I just found this sort of. boring and maybe if I had seen the first one I'd be a little bit like oh at least this is better than or this is worse than or I'd have something to really have in my mind something to play with but for most of this I was like wait that doesn't make any sense and it's not something to what Eric is saying I like generally I prefer more outrageous stuff when I'm looking for a bloke's night out I want I I'm more like what's the the Hulk Hogan movie with the dukey.

No holds. Stuff like that is more what I feel when you have the lads over and you're going to really make fun of something big like that. This I just was kind of like, okay. My mates would love it. I am Eric's mate. I'm kind of have fun with it. I'm with Eric on this, actually.

Like, I think it's just stupid enough. I'm actually glad it's not another, even though it doesn't make sense to be called White Noise and it abendens everything. It should be, I'm glad it goes this final destinationy direction. I kind of wish they got there early. because I don't mind a final destination knockoff.

Like that's kind of fun. Those sequences, like the piano sequence and the suicide by cop are pretty good. I kind of want to see that bus go into him drive into that bus, that old fucker. I want to say that old fucker do it anyway. But yeah, it's mostly fun. And I like Nathan Fillion and Katie Sackoff. I agree that very sloggy at parts with the fucking research. But I would, it's a light recommend in that like let's have a couple beers and watch a bad movie kind of a deal.

Yeah. I mean, I think I'm probably like. somewhere in the middle of Chris and the two of you guys. And I think the reason is, here's my thing. You know this is direct to DVD. This is just going right from the fucking film canister to the Best Buy. There is no theatrical stop along the way. Straight to 480P.

Exactly. But why then does your sequel to a horror movie have to pull so many punches? I should see the fucking bust demolished. Yeah, you're right. The VW bus demolish those people. I should see a golier version of the piano accident. Like that stuff should be there. Make it that kind of a fun thing.

And it trips over its obsession with like going back to like the grief of losing your loved ones and the afterlife and all that other fucking donkey shit that's like those movies exist and those movies are fine. But like if you're making me start thinking about final destination as much as I was watching this movie, I need final destination-esque. action and it fails at that. Although I do think Phileon and Sackoff are great. I think that both of them, they have good chemistry and they're interesting to watch together. So that's fine.

And like I said, that is the rare thing in these direct-to-d-d-d-d-div-dequels of like, oh, that's a person that's actually been in things, and not just some noble Canadian making their cinematic debut. So, you know, do with that what you will. But that is going to do it for White Noise, too. Call on the Light. Thanks again to Luis from Tucson. Thank you. For requesting that guy.

If you want more, we hate movies, of course. Check out our Patreon, y'all. Patreon.com slash we ate movies where you can get episodes just like this one, except commercial free. No advertisements on them whatsoever. This month, of course, being listener request month that has spilled over into a lot of the selections. We had a WLM on Clerks, which was a lot of fun. We had some sort of anime cartoon that was requested.

Delicious in Dungeon. That's right. It was just a lot of fun about some Netflix anime that apparently people like. And we'll find out when we actually do it, but it's already out for you to hear. You've already had a good time with it. We have yet to watch it at the time of this recording. Because we're GO. We VP, Electric Voice Podcast.

This is the anime I forged in life. Tell your friends. Ghost tornado. And then, of course, we talked about a real mass murderer on the Gleeve Glacrisary. That's right. The 10 Garnete, I think his name is. He's the Death Star Gunner, blew up Alderan. And I'm sure he had other wonderful, colorful adventures.

you will have heard or will hear on the Gleeve Gloucester. And then if you're listening to this on the day, it comes out, which is indeed the 24th of March. Just two days later this week, Thursday on the 26th. We do have the Nexus dropping. That was listener requested also. We have a Kira-centric DS9 and a very awesome Picard-centric TNG to go through there as well. And of course, last week, if you also missed it or you're catching up.

Just a reminder, we had a rocking bonus. We Love Movies episode on the film Joy Ride, John Doll's Joy. ride. We were talking about that with Matt and Tyler from Radio Silence. That was a lot of fun. Get them buns to the theater to see that movie who did an opening weekend. It's a lot, a lot of fun. And speaking of fucking gooey explosions that I love seeing. Yes. Oh, we also had a Melroo 2.10, Chris. We did. We did indeed a two part Melrose place. Mary Poppins is in prison now. Thank God. Hopefully. Throw away the key.

Killer. But we are hopefully taking a little break from a baby kidnapping, getting back to normal, you know, betrayal. and almost killings in Mao's place as we like to. The good stuff. That's always it. Also, by the way, back on Friday the 13th, we did release into the Patreon shop. The video show we did a couple years, three years ago now almost. On Friday the 13th, the final chapter.

You can get that when you buy that. It's video and audio format. So check that out in the shop as well. And we have, because it's crazy, it's a five Tuesday March, which I feel like we haven't had in a while. But that means one delicious week left. of listener request month, Steve. What are we talking about? It is time for Justin

Timberlake at his hot mother in in time. Oh, boy. Oh, man. All right. I believe. I don't know. I think it was maybe just me and you, Chris Cabin. We did an Astoria watch of this. I watched it in that Astoria apartment with somebody. I did not see this. I watched this a couple years ago

with my wife, just a bad movie night like you do. And I've been trying to get this on the schedule ever since. It kind of gets kicked around for different things, which happens a lot on this show. But I'm so glad that Whomever called it in, we'll find out next week. Maybe we did watch it. I just don't remember. There's a lot of that.

Because I definitely have a memory of, like, sitting through this at that old apartment in the living room. Like, so maybe I just dropped by. Maybe nobody else was there. I don't know. You were the Kramer of that apartment. I guess so. It was crazy. But yes, next week we are talking about in time with Mr. Timberlake.

Until then, I've been Andrew Jufen. Stephen Zaid. Eric Cisker. Chris Gavin. Take it easy.