We Hate Movies - S16: Holiday Unlock: How the Grinch Stole Christmas (2000)

Episode Date: December 23, 2025

“The Grinch has a FUPA!” - Andrew On this holiday unlock episode from seven Christmases ago, the gang travels to Whoville to chat about the outrageous live-action Dr. Seuss adaptation, How the Grinch Stole Christmas! Get in the holiday spirit as you watch the Grinch do all the beloved gags you remember him doing, like shove stuff up his ass, swear in front of children, murder a yodeler, and motorboat a random woman he went to high school with! PLUS: Donald Sutherland starring as the Grinch in the 1970s? Sign us up!  How the Grinch Stole Christmas stars Jim Carrey, Taylor Momsen, Christine Baranski, Bill Irwin, Molly Shannon, Kelly the Dog, and Clint Howard; directed by Ron Howard. This episode is brought to you by Sonos! This holiday season, give the gift of Sonos sound! Looking for the perfect last-minute gift? Sonos is offering up to 25% off now through December 28, 2025 at sonos dot com. Throughout 2025, we’ll be donating 100% of our earnings from our merch shop to the Center for Reproductive Rights. So head over and check out all these masterful designs and see what tickles your fancy! Shirts? Phone cases? Canvas prints? We got all that and more! Check it out and kick in for a good cause! Original cover art by Felipe Sobreiro.

Hey, y'all, shout out to Sonos for sponsoring this week's episode on How the Grinch Stole Christmas. You know, this holiday season, you're going to want to give that gift of Sono sound, y'all. And a little later in the program, we're going to tell you exactly how to do it. Oh, perfect. What's up, everybody? Happy Christmas week, such as it is. We are recording this special intro because, as you've noticed, from the title of the thing you just downloaded, this is an unlocked episode that we did seven.

Christmases ago on Ron Howard's How the Grinch stole Christmas and yes, it's the 25th anniversary. I didn't even know that. What a special occasion on seven year anniversary of this episode. This gives you an idea what you've been missing for seven years. There's quality stuff back there behind the curtain folks. Oh no crummy crummy's back there dude. No. Talking about the most annoying movies ever made. I mean, we are really talking to, I mean, this is Jim Carrey annoying you to the hill.

The best of the best. Well, to be fair, did we did we this is back when we used to do one more uh we hate movies on that feed now we do we love movies on that feed right so there's a little bit of both yeah this is the uh anyone watch of those walton guggins grinch commercials those are pretty awful excuse me what's that what's that what's that about now what walton guggins is the grinch i think it's for walmart is this in japan or something no this is here dude really we have no shame anymore oh okay god damn you know you used to be you wanted to make a humiliating commercial for a large chunk of You went overseas for that shit.

No, no, no. That's, and I prefer that because, you know what? They enjoyed themselves or doing those four commercials. They actually seemed like light, and they had seemed to enjoy themselves because they're like, there's no shame. I don't have to worry about this. I don't have to worry about my image. This is something completely else.

Oh, you go to another country, do some sex tourism, do some bad commercials. You come back a new man or woman. It's fine. Exactly. I do have to say, I don't know if that can. I will watch this and I'll make my judgment. That is not, it cannot be as annoying as the. the Benedict Cumberbatch

doing the reviews Oh, that's bad. He reads, yeah, he reads the reviews in the Grinch voice. I cannot, not in the voice. It's just, I thought he was doing the cheapest thing. No, it's just like, hey,

Benedict Cumberbatch come out, sit in the chair in front of this, like, there's a guy playing a piano, that's a Christmas tree, and just read a review, and that's the commercial. A review of the Mosier movie? That he did?

No, no, it's the Amazon, it's like Amazon product. it'll be like a five-star review. Hello there. Got it. I thought you were saying there's a commercial going around of Benedict Cumberbatch

reading shit people wrote about his Grinch movie. I forgot he did it too. They're all the Grinch. They've all been the Grinch. I may have played the Grinch. I don't fucking know at this point. Boris Karlov,

Jim Carrey, Walton Gaggins, and Benedict Cumberbatch. All the Grinch. I'm pretty sure this episode does not have extensive TV commercial talk. You guys should enjoy it at home.

Yeah, yeah. Please do. That's right. Yeah, but that's it. We just want to do this intro. Happy, happy holidays. Merry Christmas if you celebrate in this week. We just need to give these old vocal cords a rest.

So here we go. That's me opening up the vault. Enjoy the episode. On this month's only exclusive episode. Well, I guess technically speaking here, also the spooktacular continues. Yes, it does. My God. It never ends the horror.

This is worse than any horror we watched this past month. This is body horror to the endth degree. It's how the Grinch stole Christmas. Here on We Hate Movies. I'm Andrew Juppen. Steven Sadat. Chris Cabin. Eric Siska.

And we hate movies. Hello, loyal Patreon subscriber, and welcome to We Hate Movies. Thank you for tuning in, as always, and thank you for continuing to support this show with your hard-earned bucks. Wouldn't it be We-Hoot? movies. Oh, Jesus. It starts already, huh? This is how the Grinch Stole Christmas from the year 2000

directed by Ronald Howard. And look out this time because I'll do this whole podcast and rhyme. No, I won't. No, you better not. Okay, well, continue. Yeah, all right. Let's do it. I'll wait. This movie stinks a lot. So much so makes me want to fart a lot.

Oh, wow. Okay. You know what? Let him go. No, no. No. we'll come back to that. People are paying for this. We can make this a three-hour episode, just Steve. We just got a bunch of messages for refunds. Today on Steve's

in a cold sweat. We're doing this this month because this movie was released November the 17th, the year 2000. This was the movie that kicked off the holiday movie season that year. And I got to tell you, I'd see like posters for this, or in this case, if I watch

it through its entirety, I have heinous flashbacks because this was, to this day, the worst, most insane time to be working at any movie theater that I've worked at. And the 18 years I've been in the theatrical exhibition business. Oh. How the Grinch Still Christmas opening fucking broke me. Biggest lines I've ever seen in my life. Really? What?

It was, dude, it was fucking nuts. At our theater, I mean, this was a huge hit. But at our theater, we had this on like four, three screens, three or four screens. Gotcha. And to give you an idea, I was talking about this with somebody recently. we would do like one little garbage run at the end of the night so you had the little wheelie dumpster

and you put all the vomit oh wheelie dumpster that's a that's a Chris Clint Howard wheelie dumpster hey I'm wheelie dumpster you take your dumpster and you would

go down to the mall's trash compact and you usually did like one trip and it was a bunch of bags or whatever we were doing like multiple fucking garbage runs a day because of all the concession items we were selling it was pandemonium people were like ducking out in between shit like people would take

over their register so they could run out and do it. It was insane. Hey Marla come on there's a big blockbuster coming out and there ain't no black people in it for once. I guess so I mean right? What are we talking about? I mean that it was upstate New York so yeah yeah yeah I don't know I just

and watching it now finally all these years later all the way through I never had seen it you know in one piece. Sure. What did people see in this movie? It's just like Jim Carrey at the height of the gym carrying or this is post i mean the wave is cresting he's on decline yeah like post liar liar pre bruce almighty i want to guess eternal sunshine is a couple yeah that's a way it's a waste off bruce almighty i think was like 2003 yeah so like and that was like that was like a last gasp of like can we still

jim carry is like nah this movie shows you that we could not still jim carry okay well we the people watching it couldn't but the fucking companies were still making it but bruce Almighty was a huge hit too. Oh yeah. I know. These movies made money. These movies made money. And the thing is, the one thing I will give this movie is this movie could not exist in any fashion without Jim Carrey.

Or should not exist. Well, yeah, I agree with that. It's his, like, real. So, yeah. He's just doing it. I mean, were you guys catching, like, when he was making jokes and gestures that he repeated from other movies? Yeah.

Oh, yeah. Definitely in this movie, there's like one. I'll find it in my. knows when we come to it, but there was a very specific joke from the second Ace Ventura movie which I've seen more than the first one and I was like, hey, wait a minute, Jim Carrey. I'm going to give you a little Jim Carrey timeline

just to give you an idea. All right. I'm not doing like shorts and like TV or whatever. Ace Ventura Petty was in shorts? You know, like whatever. He was in something called the Itsy Bitsy Spider. It was a short in 1992. But now I'm talking about it. Let's talk about it. Now the patrons are hearing.

Did he play the Spider? He played The Exterminator. It's a voice. Anyways, he's Ace Ventura, 94 breaks big. 94 also, the mask somehow. 94 also, dumb and dumber. How did I not know all three of those movies? Yeah, dude, that's the trifective carry. I mean, that's how you do it.

That's got a stratosphere. That's going to be the biggest year for any actor ever. I would. Quite possibly, yeah. Those are three, for the time, massive movies. Then 95 is the Ridler in Batman Forever. 95. Also, Ace of Dore, the man did not sleep when nature calls.

96 cable guy 97 liar liar 98 Truman Show Oh oh we're getting serious 9080s in Simon Birch for It looks probably a cameo I'm gonna guess He's only at the end A Man in the Moon is 99 That's a great documentary

We'll probably talk about that a lot He's kind of doing in this movie A little bit of a Tony Clifton He is I noticed My comparison is going to be His Tony Clifton Mixed with like a non-Skottish Connery non-Scottish

Connery, yeah, I guess. Just kind of like doing a voice that sort of sounds like Sean Connery. And then you get the pepper now. I'm doing that's the Grinch.

Now I'm the Grinch who's stealing Christmas. Rub my hairy bump. Dude, he's got a fucking fupa in this movie. I don't know if anyone noticed. How could you not?

The Grinch has a fupa. It's swayed and flame. Kaufman, rub my green bump. To finish it, me myself and I read in 2000, the Grinch, 2000. Majestic 2001. I pay you to see that movie.

So did I. I took my dad to it and I cried. I feel like I'll never say it. Bruce Almighty 2003 Eternal Sunshine 2004. A series of unfortunate event 2004. We're still Jim Carrying. Fun with Dick and Jane. This is 2005. People

are like, do we want to? That movie is a fucking rotten bag of garbage left out the sun. I never saw that or the Lemmy Snicks. The number 23. 2007 where he's like he's a mystery solving saxophone player I saw it in theaters

I don't remember a link of it that I believe Chris Cabin correct me if I'm wrong is a Joel Schumacher movie I think it is yeah Wharton hears of who he's in he's back to the sousaverse Yes man I love you Philip Morris

A Christmas Carol that fucking Dude you can't you can't look at those things That the fucking what was the first Express is the other one That and then the one with Beowulf Yes, Beowulfs. Mr. Poppers, penguins.

I forgot about a lot of these. Oh, Mr. Popper's Penguins. Oh, my... We actually highlighted that movie on this show a thousand years ago. Yes, I remember that. It was like a 2011 wrap-up or something. Yeah, like summer movies, man.

I've done talking about Jim Carrey movies. I got so fucked up and I went and watched Mr. Popper's Penguins. And then I got so fucked up and went on a podcast. Yeah, you are particularly fucked up on that episode. I was pretty great. Crazy back in the day. Just a while? child. I was Wildman.

So was I the only one who was watching this in its entirety for the first time for this? No, I never saw before. I saw it. Did you go to the theater? I had a family, yes. Oh, I'm sorry. We're all orphaned. I'm sorry. We're all orphaned.

Welcome back to the fucking Gotham orphanage with Chris Cabin. The only man with a family. Steve and I were working in the factory that I adopted them. They're staying in my home now. We're all wards of Chris Cabin. It's a mess.

I'll be honest. Yikes. That's a sitcom I'd watch. No, but yes. You saw it with my family. My fiance saw with her family as well. And it was awful. I knew it back then.

I know it now. And watching again, a lot of this stuff, I really was like he, he's quietly jigsaw, I think. Okay. Because we start and like he's not like, when we fight about his origins, nothing special just ended up in Whoville.

Yeah, sure. Which is in a snowflake. I guess, apparently. That's a weird like men in black the universe is in a marble thing. Sure, guys. I mean, it looks like...

Your whole universe is in a snowflake, you lib-tard. I'm gonna drink your little tears. Well, I go back to fucking Donald Sutherland and fucking animal house. In your cuticle, it could be a whole universe.

Oh, yeah, exactly. Would anybody like to smoke some pot? Exactly. Nice butt cheeks in that movie. Who, Donald Sutherland is the Grinch, Back of the day in the 70s. Oh, a 70s, Grinch? Yes. Would any who like to smoke some pot?

He's driving a hard top Cadillac? 70s, real life fucking Grinch? I don't know. I'm liking this idea. I love this idea. I mean, the special effects of the costuming or whatever would look so horrible. He looked like fucking West Craven's Swamp thing costume, dude.

Peter Boyle is the mayor of Ville. Come on out, Grinch. We're going to burn your life. Cut the bullshit, Grinch. Just cut the bullshit. Yes, this is a Lou Who and I'm here to correct the record.

Oh, fuck, dude. He just starts taking out residents of Hoover. Instead of inside a snowflake, it's inside just a small particle of cocaine. Yes, perfect. Sitting on Harvey Kitell's finger.

No, that's exactly. That's what it's the Grinch's 1970s. Maybe he's green. It's Donald Sutherland. but instead of stealing Christmas he steals all their cocaine and they all have to come after and get him.

And instead of directed by Ron Howard directed by Martin Scorsese Yes, love it. Absolutely loving it. See that fucking Grinch up there? That motherfucking Grinch is up there with my wife. Now that I would watch.

All of the whos and Hooville are going to be a little bit sober tonight and he's just going all the way through. Is it helicopter following this? I saw it early today The Grinch is sitting in his little cave listening to the Rolling Stones Oh, you're a rich man

Mr. Grinch You're gonna sell this Coke Way more interesting Oh absolutely Also here's the biggest fuck you about this movie It's like This movie is like an hour and 45 minutes The first hour fucking nothing to do

With stealing Christmas Yes I mean like what that's a big of the movie thing. It's a fucking 40-page Christmas, children's book, with like 80 to 90 words in it. 25 minute movie! 25

minutes. Guys, everything done. The cartoon from the series. The original cartoon. 25 minutes. They somehow built this whole fucking thing to add on to 25 minutes that I could not care about. Well, it's like, it's one of the things you mentioned already. They fucking tell his little Oswald Cobble Pot story.

Jesus. Well, he's like, fucking dejected by society and he's like raised by these two old ladies or whatever I like that's a little progressive you know they're living together it's very implied that they're a lesbian couple I mean oh is it

they're living together I lived with you yeah well I mean you know he's dressed like a little Eddie Munster so do we do it so the thing is disturbing I mean yeah we don't start there no sorry we don't we start with

we were meeting everyone in Whoville narrated by Anthony Hopkins by the way Here's a fan theory When Anthony Hopkins does shit It's Tony Hopkins Maybe he's having Yeah, because he's like fun on the sets It's like, yeah, it's me Tony

It's like the dark half Oh no Tony is gonna have to do that boy Well, hold on I'm summoning Tony To negotiate about Transformers The last night Michael, Michael Vey comes to his house

Anthony can I speak to Tony? You want to speak to Tony Is Tony in there? Anthony, listen, it's very imperative. I need to speak with Tony. We need to get Tony back for some re-recording of his dialogue. Yes, Tony had some cocaine last night. Maybe you'll come back tomorrow.

I get Tony. Anthony, what was it like to make the Mask of Zoro? I didn't make the Mask of Zoro. No, you must be thinking of Tony. No, no, Tony's not here. Oh, what about Hearts in Atlantis? Yes, that was me. Anthony.

In this case, though, I think, when he's doing voiceover, it's a solid Mr. Hopkins. Oh, I like this. Because honestly, he's just sitting there with his fucking ginseng tea and whatever else. A little whiskey in it. And that's it. So he's just all bundled up. I don't think he's too crazy.

20 minutes tops. And the weird thing, so it's the, and the narration veers between, and I think the structure is fine. It should be just have Hopkins do the book. Yes. And keep inserting the book into the movie and then that's fine. Again, because it's really

short, you could do that whole thing. But then he's also narrating and he's like, oh, and then Cindy Lou Who thought this and that. And I'm like, no, no, no, no, it's a movie. I'm watching the movie. And then Lou Whoop remembered Dom. Bill Irwin just falls down at the post office screaming. One of the

first things we see when we start going through the residence of Whoville here at the start is there's like a guy playing like a, god damn it like a tuba. Oh, and there's a little person I sign it? What is with the fucking weird small people? That is the rest of the movie now, exploring what is going

on with these little people and will they rise up? Dude, that's a DVD bonus movie The Little Trumpet Who. And in case you're wondering, we're not talking about like little people, we're talking about like three inch people. Yeah, it's a possibly small Lilliputian-esque person. Like brownies from the motion picture Willow. Yes. Oh, wow.

Nice. Speaking of Ron Howard movies. We're circled in the toilet to get to that movie eventually. I've never seen it actually. That's the first movie I ever saw in theaters and I don't really remember any of them. I remember liking it a lot. So I want to go back and see what it's about. There's swords, there's elves, there's horses. There's men

turned into pigs and now I'm a man. I have become a man turned into a pig myself. He's a pig man, Jerry. There's a man who kills people with a mascot. I love it already, right? And you had Val Kilmer? Come on. But what are these little things? I don't know. And they're never acknowledged or

you don't see them eaten or flicked off things. At the end of the movie, they should be burning the village down and taking over. This is the danger of trying to explain this world outside of what the 25 minutes did. Yes. Because you're like, I'm going to care about this stuff and then half care about everything else. But does the book have drawings of these little weirdos? Yeah.

In the fucking movie, there's the little tiny people. When they're taking the tree and like the first shot, there's tiny people holding it up in the middle. I thought those were babies. No, they're tinier. They're not. They're tiny. Walking fetuses. Yes.

Yes. Walking who fetuses. You just named. Puttices. Sorry you liberals don't want. Walking Fetuses, you just want to kill them all. The Grinch is Antifa. I see.

You just named some like suburban garage like shitty metal band. Oh, Walking Fetis. We are the walking fetuses. It's spelled like Christopher Walking. Oh, absolutely. Oh, crap. Dying fetus is gone.

Bloody fetus is gone. The fetuses are gone. Fuck. Okay. Hey, you guys want to watch Walking Dead? What did you say? it's called walking fetus because maybe you know maybe Natalie Wood was pregnant you know or maybe they're going to just take a turn take a turn into like Christian music now I like how there was silence on this Saturday moon it was a terror

that's an ass clenching when you volley a fireball I will try to hit it I just ducked under the fucking table man oh no I took my beer and hid I thought that would be a crowd pleaser. I just saw white when that happened. Steve's been blacked out for 15 minutes. It's okay. She died a long time ago. No one cares anymore.

They're not even investigating. No, didn't they literally break that investigation back open? They say that to make you feel better, make you sleep at night. Think that justice is out there, but it's not. Yeah, now Bobby Wagner's back on the sauce, back on the pills. Just because hell, what night? Is Robert Wagner dead? No, he's alive.

Oh, that's... He should be in jail. It seems like you should be in jail. I don't know, man. I don't know anything about it. I don't know anything about it. So, um, I wasn't there. I don't think you were.

You were barely a walking fetus at that point. Hey, folks, today's episode on how the Grinch stole Christmas is sponsored by Sonos. This holiday season, give the gift of Sonos sound to a loved one or, hey, why not yourself with a little to me from me action? There's nothing wrong with a little treat yourself situation. hey, you just may find yourself sitting on some gifted cash cards from the holiday hall, so why not use them to help up your home audio game with Sonos? The holidays are in full swing, and whether you're inviting folks over for a big holiday feast

or you're possibly hosting a big New Year's Eve bash at your house next week, Sonos should be on hand to handle all the vibes. With Sonos whole home audio, you can connect your entire home to play the same tunes in every room through devices like their move-to portable speakers and the Arc Ultra soundbars. Or, if you want to change things up, different rooms can have different music making the vibes different from room to room, changing how you feel when you go throughout your house.

However you like to entertain, Sonos will make everything sound better. And the other cool part is, Sonos creates sleek, gorgeously designed equipment that will look fabulous in your home and not stick out like a sore thumb. Looking for the perfect last minute gift? Sonos is offering up to 25% off

now through December 28th at Sonos.com. That once again, folks, listen up. If you're looking for that last minute, minute perfect gift. Sonos is offering up to 25% off now through December 28th, 2025 at sonose.com. Can I just say

this is a classic case and see a previously released episode on The Cat in the Hat? Some shit just ain't meant to come to life, brother. I'm getting creeped out just watching this movie. All the hooves look disgusting. They just, they

just be people in the in the cartoon and I believe in the drawing they just have little antennas that's easy just everyone's got a little antennas you know you're in a magical world whatever dog face they have that's the thing they look like fucking Disney's interpretation of dog people yes it's disgusting and I gotta think about dog people fucking and making these babies

they have a canonical faces like they come out to a cone point because it's for sniffing asses it's like evolution we're gotta get there you know up to a point it kind of is dog people in that cartoon, other than Cindy Lou who is a beautiful, you know,

Aryan child. Yeah, and she's got a regular fucking face. Doesn't she have a fake nose though? No, no, she got a real nose. Jeffrey Tambor at some point later in the movie when he's fucking chewing this girl out. He's like, and she doesn't even, she hasn't even grown into her nose yet. So at some point, like maybe it's like puberty,

like X-Men, like you just turned into a dog person. Oh, your your nose hasn't dropped yet. Oh my God. I missed that line. That's bone-chilling, but that's a exactly what that means. They're born like a normal looking human being. And then just one day, dude, snap,

your voice drops, your snout grows. If there's a dog nose on the field play ball, I guess. That's the rule. The question, though, is, so the narration is like, oh, you know, all the who's love all the holidays, but they love Christmas, most of all. If we're going to blow this shit out,

I want to see what Who Valentine's Day looks like. I want to see what, that is the one I expressly. do not want to fucking see. I want to see what St. Patrick's Day's up to. I want to see who 4th of July. Yes, exactly. Are you sure about that? Because there could be a bagelian because not only are they like celebrating bullshit holidays like Arbor Day. Yes, that's mentioned in this narration. They also have like St. Fizzy Wicks Day or fucking, you know. Well, that's the thing. How many Christian holidays are we celebrating here? That's a great question. Is there a Whoville Easter? Like, are we celebrating the resurrection? Well, I mean, there's no Jesus to be found

anywhere near this movie, man. We, we take, this is an X mass. situation. Really? Yeah. But they do say Christmas, which that's a Christ right in there. Yeah, but that's just part of the word. I think that like X-Mass was invented after this movie. But there might be a Who Christ. No, I don't see

any paintings of Jesus Who-Christ. Yes. I don't see a painting. I don't see a fucking sculpture. Do you think? But Santa Claus exists. So strictly pagan, we're saying, like they're taking like the Germanic entire. Oh, sure. Get fucking Brad Pitt in there with a dog nose and let's do.

it. As Who Christ? Yeah, as Who Christ. I would like to see him be pierced by a spear and whipped by Who Centaurians. This is what you're thinking about at night? Yes. That brings me to my next question though, man. So thinking in terms of like a Who crucifixion. Sure, yeah. Do Who's possessed like red blood like us or do they bleed like blue or like vanilla cream? Yeah, that's a great. I would think vanilla cream is probably the right one. Boy, that's delicious. But this is reminding me of there's a

classic kids in the hall sketch that it's like Dr. Seuss's Bible. Oh, really? And it's all about like they're rhyming and stuff and like doing the entire crucifixion. Oh, that's fun. It's hysterical. Oh, man. YouTube might have that. So, okay, then here's my question. In this

fucking snowflake. Yeah. Are there other vills or it's just whoville in this one fucking thing? Because there's one part where there's a yodler. I don't know if he's a who or not or what's going on with I think that's a hoot. Yeah. You're going to look, good look at him, though.

Okay. The Grinch murders him immediately. So, I mean, like, it's commercialism gone mad, right? It's your standard Christmas. Everyone's going nuts about sales. The whole town is going ab shit for sales. There are, I will say there, there are black who's, but they don't actually speak. Like, if you look close enough, there'll be a black who here and there extra. That's it. Yeah, I didn't even see them. Yes. There's one, like, specifically the register person at the beginning is, I was going to say, that's a black person. dude's featured quite prominently. Yeah, but like, but there's no, like, no one in the town is a black who. No, no. Well, Jeffrey Tambor, who's not going to allow that?

Augustus Mayhew or whatever is his name? Who's that? Oh, Jeffrey Tamboor. Oh, the mayor. I did not recognize. He's the only one I did not recognize. Yeah, you better off. I just recognize the voice. He puts that makeup back on, starts trying to act again. Like, no, no, no. It's, it's me, Augustus Mayhew.

You know who he looks like? with that makeup on, though? Because he looks like a fucking DuckTales dog person is the butler from DuckTales. Oh, right. He kind of does. Almost do a T. It's pretty funny. I got to tell you Clint Howard looks a little bit better with this makeup on. He does. I think he should keep

it on forever. He's got the wig. He's doing all right. It's not bad. He looked normal. He's got like cheery makeup on. It just worked. It was the one thing that worked. The dad is Bill Irwin, world famous clown slash dude from Legion and all sorts of other stuff.

Oh, is he on Legion? Yeah. He's really like two episodes of that show. I fell off the second season, but I really wanted to finish it. And My Blue Heaven. He's great. My Blue Heaven. He is. He is. Yeah.

Bill Irwin's in that. And then you've got... And he was apparently an interstellar as the voice of Tars, the robot. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I learned something to do. He's good as the dad in Rachel getting married. Yes, he's excellent in that movie. And then Molly Shannon, because it was 2000, she was allowed to be in movies.

She's back in movies these days, I think, right? She's back. She's fine. her way through like independent drummers and what. Yes. Uh, but she's, uh, his wife. And then you've got Christine Bransky, the only other recognizable person as like the love

interest, which is, what's her? Huvier, something hoovier. Hovier. It is whoovié. It's like March Muvee. Yeah, yeah. Whatever. Or yeah, or uh, Jackie O'Anse's Kennedy's. And, but she's attached to the mayor. Yes. Just wrote they're, it's this weird, like, they're dating

and they're in their like fucking 60s. It's in the middle of this movie. He proposes to him. I'm like, dude, are you both, like, divorcese or widows? They got a who divorce? It's like Al Pacino and Beverly DeAngelo. Oh, there you go. My girlfriend, hoo-ha. I'm a hoo-ha.

Welcome to Whoville. Oh, he would definitely be the fucking mayor. Oh, you're like my girlfriend, Miss Huvier, right? Because she's got a great ass. And your snouts all up in it. her name is Martha May Huvier

Gotcha Martha May Marlene Oh that Dude there it is Huville Like just outside of Whoville

There's a farm Fucking cult like Utopian Society Dude that's what I want To see Well that's the thing And also going back To your religious stuff

There's something called The Book of Who Yeah Which like the fuck are we That's where all the spells are That's where Who Christ is Yeah I mean

We transfer everything over here Like a turkey is roast Beast The Book of Who It's clearly the Turner Diaries. Oh, my Lord. Yeah, that's A to B.

Oh, I just don't picturing Dr. Seuss's Turner Diaries. That's an unpleasant thought. Yeah, I don't know. So, like, we're going nuts about Christmas and Cindy Lou who,

who is our, who's also, who wound up being an act, Taylor Mom since her name, she wound up being an actress and a singer for the Pretty Reckless, which is maybe a band

you might have heard of. I'm not sure. I have no idea what they are. I think they've probably heard of gossip girl more than that, but we're old people here. We just, I just look stuff up on IMDB, I do my best. I've heard of the film Underdog.

Oh, she played Molly. Oh, yuck. Really? She's in that movie. That's a movie I forget about all the time. Absolutely. That's an adaptation of the television cartoon, but it's got a live action dog like airbud or something. And I think it's being like manipulated entirely by a computer. It's similar

to the Marmaduke fiasco. What we refer to as the Marmaduke viasco. All right. Children open your textbooks to Chapter 29, the Marmaduke fiasco. Now, Europe was trying to strong arm us in tariffs, and we sent a large dog over there to sort it out. They didn't listen to them. They'd just listen to them. They would be fine today. Initiative bark at the Kaiser. So she's, but she's also, like, she's the only one in town that's with a fucking soul. How about that? She's like, oh, you know, everyone's being a bit too commercial, this, that, and the other thing.

And that's kind of her bit. We cut to Mount Crumpet, I guess it's called it. Oh, you know it. Dude, it turns into a slasher movie for five minutes. Dude, that's the thing is like, we meet these four teens and these like four sexy hootines. And it's like, you're going to go knock on the Grinch's door, man. Yeah. These chicks will totally lay us if we knock on the haunted house, brother.

I wish it turned, I wish it was just Jim Carrey slaughtering these. just like wearing their fucking flesh around like I wish I looked like a hoo oh my god it's he's not even that hairy it's just they're like decaying skins their hides on his body that are turning gang green it's like Stephen King and fucking creep show

I was gonna go Texas chainsaw with it it's a bunch of hootines one who was a fat who teen in a wheelchair and we're going up how are they getting the fat who up the mountain in the wheelchair and they're just Jim Carrey with a fucking hammer just slamming people.

Gotta slam this big hood door in your face. Get the sledge leather. There's a beautiful shot of Jim Carrey with a candy cane and it's like sunsitting. Later on we do see him fully nude in front of a child. He's wearing pants as a kid. He's wearing pants when he goes to town. Yet we see his naked body right up against this underage girl.

Clearly what happens when you give up on society. I guess so. It's okay. The Fupa covers it. Yeah, I mean, the nudity to me is a bit weird. Like, he is just naked.

Yeah. Because he doesn't know what shame is and he must have some genitals to cover. Because, well, the thing is in the original cartoon

I haven't watched him forever, but I think he's just like Donald ducking it or whatever because it's a fucking cartoon. Sure, exactly. He's naked. He's naked there in the whole damn thing. Yeah,

but now in this, this is a sex criminal. But like in this one, especially, because they established that he wore clothes and that he does wear clothes when he goes outside

like when he even goes and infiltrates this town at the start of the film I love this part actually he's dressed like a Ninja Turtle going to a porno theater he definitely is no he dressed like he's dressed

like he's in the perch he's got this fucking purge mask on right that mask is terrifying he also he could do the um the Ron Perlman Beauty and the Beast TV show because he was he had the fucking hood cape thing going on

that a lot, crawling around the sewers and shit. But this is the exact reason why you can't bring cartoons to life all the time. The genitalia factor. The genitalia factor he needs to even be wearing pants all the time or he does not wear pants. That's true because actually

it's the acknowledgement of wearing pants at some point that is like presumably you have something to cover up. And clearly, Christine Beranski wants to fuck this Grinch's brains out. He sure does. So he's got something down there. Do you think he did? Like does he is he even is he even i guess he's he's supposed to be a who who i't we don't know

let us i mean we're going to go 45 minutes on what exactly happens when fucking kids come into this world it's like the boss baby situation it's really bad oh i forgot they do kind of address that in this movie you might just like spray out of a little hole and fertilize eggs like the way this thing is presented or he's got he might have a red or green rocket it might be green but it's a rocket it's a great rock and i mean christine bratsky clearly has a normal whogina see it's that's why dr who is a genius just put who in front of anything and i'm laughing so did i i'm sorry dr seuss pardon me dr seuss reformed

to doctor who um yeah every every generation is a new dr seuss right and now it's a woman oh that's a problem my god damn So, um, whatever. He scares these teens. These teens run away. He has this, like, security system. Yeah. It's like, and he has this big, like fake grinch that he scares them with. Like, oh, is that what that was supposed to look like? Yeah, it's supposed to be a monster. It also looks like a float in like the penguin's fucking, like, Gotham parade from Batman Returns. I've got a problem with this because it's like, all right, like, you want to say there's this legendary, like, scary figure up there.

like, okay, you know, like, you know, you get this scary house, the old lady, he's been there forever, you don't know what the hell that's it, that's going on in there. But like, half of these characters went to high school with this dude. That's what I love is this high school angle. Oh my God. It's just a guy you knew. Yeah, exactly.

Like, you literally knew the guy. It's up in like three generations that everyone died off and like maybe somebody knows like, no, no, no, literally like, I went to I went to college with Eric and then Eric moved up state and I'm like, that fucking weirdo moved up state. He's a mom. It's such a small society that the only person that didn't become a shitty townie

is suddenly ostracized for living outside of this community. It would be kind of awesome if there was like a follow-up movie where you have all of these like adult Who people that were all in high school together. And they get word that the Grinch has committed suicide. And they all come back from their busy lives all over Whoville and get together after his funeral one night. Got you know. And like one night turns into a weekend and they're all sitting around. listening to old R&B, just having a great time catching up.

Making breakfast and making dinner all the time. Just dancing and singing and like kind of having sex quietly. Kind of rocking out to the Who Priams. That's right, dude. Just be the Who Chill. I would like that follow-up story. That should be some adult Sue's fish. I think it's this, you can't totally vindicate him, though.

He's like a Ted Kaczynski type. It's a little bit of both. Yeah, that's like you kind of, yeah, yes, he isolated himself and everybody else. is an asshole, sure, but you got to take salt in the sweet. Well, he goes into town. He's like, it's been a while since I've fucked up town and he puts on this fucking,

he puts on this mask and he goes down and he's walking around and it's fucking terrifying. He goes to the post office speaking of Ted Kaczynski. That's right. This is all fake. What's crazy about this? He's got some letters for everybody. Which is insane because he's

special delivery. He's handing out jury duty. Yeah. So number one, okay, so that they would know what that is. Yeah. So there's a court system. Even though it would be fake like his pamphlets wouldn't be real. No. You wouldn't actually have to report you just get mad when you saw it.

Yeah, exactly. Look at this obnoxious prank. Also, how can they possibly have jury duty in a town this small? Like, there's no way anyone we get a fair trial. I think it's the mob rule, dude. They just fucking hang people. Exactly. Either like to hang or not to hang. Like, that is their system. Well, the book of who demands it.

Exactly. And there's no other forms of execution. It is simply hung from the neck until dead. No, no. You guys are going way too hard. What it is is so clearly that one person doesn't get to celebrate Christmas and then what? They go mad. They kill themselves, probably. The suicide rate is huge. I mean, that's also blackmail, though.

That's the weird thing. Like, does he have photos of people fucking like a, like a hoop? It's all polarites of me fucking other people's spouses. Fucking a hooker. dude it's mayor jiffrey tambour in the backseat of a car with a hooker by the way philippe somebody here get us a count on how many who jokes we make on this oh it's it's too late there's just don't count the counter is broken yeah i went to yeah i had uh i had dinner at hooters and then i picked up a hooker

come on yeah so he's hoot around and Cindy Lou comes in she's like oh you're the grin she tries to scare her she's not so scared he feels a little something she feels a little something but then he like says fuck you and wraps her in a present

is this when he thinks am I remembering the wrong part of the movie is this where he thinks like he's having a heart attack because like his heart starts beating a little bit that's a little later is it like with the magic of Cindy Lou Who and her girlish charm. He's still in the post office. This is a part of the movie where he's still wearing clothes and it's just this cloak, you know, like this disgusting. He also kind of, if you took that mask away, he would sort of look like Obi-1 Canobi. Oh, sure. Just like slinking around back alleys and shit.

And here is your reasoning for the dog noses. Okay. Or the pinch noses or whatever the fuck these things are. Yeah. I mean, they can't, they must not be able to smell because his whole thing is he smells like shit everywhere. But there is a deadly breath. joke, though. Yeah. I think they can smell. I think they just don't like them. Then how do they not know he's there? It's like a cloud of shit that hangs over this guy. If they have dog noses, they would smell him from like a mile

away. It would be intense. What happened to the dogs in this town? There's one dog. He's got the one dog. They fucked them. And they made the hoots. Oh, I see. It's all inner bread. That's what it is. Oh, so this is like, this is like a million years in the future. Oh, man

has bred with dog. People hate the Grinch because he didn't fuck that dog. What was he fucking then? A green monkey? There's a great documentary about one of those guys that he fucks a horse. It's called Who. Chris David loves who. W?

Yeah. W. Expert. Oh. This episode's brought you in part by Rocket Money. You know, most of us know we should take control of our finances, but it's hard to know where to start. And, you know, New Year's coming up. That could be a resolution.

you. Rocket money gives you the clarity and confidence to take that first step, helping you cut wasteful spending and take meaningful action towards your financial goals. I love that rocket money shows you all your expenses in one place, including subscriptions. You forgot about if you see a subscription you no longer want, Rocket Money will help you cancel it. Their dashboard lays out your total financial picture, including bill, due dates, and paydays in a way that's easy to digest. You can even automatically create custom budgets based on your pay. spending. If you got a goal you want to save for Rocket Money can help analyze your accounts and find the best time each month to put a little extra money aside. Rocket Money has saved users

over $2.5 billion, including $880 million and canceled subscriptions alone. Their 10 million members save up to $740 a year when they use all of the app's premium features. Cancel your unwanted subscriptions and reach your financial goals faster with Rocket Money. Go to rocketmoney.com slash WHM today. That's rocketmoney dot com slash W.HM. Rocketmoney.com slash WHM, which stands for

We Hate Movies. So, but yeah, whatever. I just have to point out because we should keep a track of his capital crimes. I mean, this is you're committing a federal offense right here. You're fucking with the post office. Mass mail.

fraud. Big time. But this dog, by the way, so Jim Carrey took him three hours to get into fucking makeup. He was furious the entire time, because as we know from all those documentaries, Jim Carrey's a fucking maniac. Big surprise. And

so he was kicking through walls. He was really pissed off. But the dog has these weird dog ear extensions. I'm just curious. Like, A, how did the dog do in the makeup chair? How long was that process? Kelly, the dog, by the way. Yeah. I got a feeling it was kind of quick.

I got a feeling that's like we're paper clipping on those ears. By the way, did anybody see the IMDB? For Kelly the dog? Kelly the dog. This is great. Is credited third. After Carrie and Mumson, it's her, I assume.

Yeah, I don't know. No, it's a lady dog played a man. It's like Asperia out in theaters now. Oh, did that dog have a prosthetic penis too? Yes. That's why you always have to hire lady dogs, no matter what the gender role of the dog. Because you don't want to see the dog.

I'm not looking at dog dick for 90 minutes, dude. That dog gets an erection. Production is shit. Production is shut down for the day. It's like, oh, dog erection in the shot. Like a K9-2000 or whatever the hell we did with that red rocket in that scene. Oh, fuck. I forgot about that.

Oh, shudder. Belushi demands male dogs. But just, like, just to make this clear, Beethoven, the dog who plays Beethoven ain't in the top 25. That's true. It's the same thing actually with man's best friend because I remember when I was looking to do like our website listing and all the info

for that episode when I posted it, I wanted to credit the dog, but he's not even fucking on the IMDB and I was like, I'm not re-renting that movie. The only situation where it's similar is Frasier. Eddie is like fifth down or something. Moose, who played Eddie. That's right. Rest in peace. All these dogs are dead.

Oh, long dead. Dust. Dog dust. You were just talking about dead dog dicks. Welcome to Patreon So he goes He fucks off to his mountain And the next kind of movement of the thing is This little girl wants to figure out what the Grinch is

And it's kind of like in the new Halloween That British team That's making a podcast about Michael Myers Because she's got like some tape recorder She's going up I was like tell me everything you know about the Grinch Oh yeah she's asking people like in the town Yes

Which again just speaks to this weird I want that movie of them like in high school or whatever like I know the Grinch is supposed to fuck off before that but can you imagine like what that show is like a Dawson's Creek with all these Hoos and the Grinch. Hi. Riverdale. Yes. Oh, even better. Yeah, make it darker. And a little sexy too. Hi, I'm Cindy Lou Who and this is Hoorio. Kevin, you're on fucking fire with that shit. Kevin got the Who button and he's going to push it and I'm fucking here for it. Every time.

I'm here for it. Got no other material folks. that's not true uh so yeah so she's finding out what's going on with this who's uh and who kimp i'm so i'm so i understood that reference she i didn't continue she winds up we learn she goes to his lesbian parents who are really progressive and awesome in this movie these two old ladies that raised him they're in the movie for like half a second i didn't even notice them they're in the beginning they're at the end when he becomes the king of the festival they both are like hey and he's like you're still alive

I do remember that line so um anyways he winds up uh going back to the he it's it's the night of the storks and all the storks are dropping off this is bullshit not even storks it's just random umbrellas bringing these fucking babies it's not a living thing that delivers these babies they're also coming down in the middle of a snow storm and it's like first these babies will all freeze to death

Lou Who just happens to be going outside to, I don't know what, throw out the turds for the night because they don't have indoor plumbing, I presume. What don't they just throw at the street? Yes. Like the middle ages? Exactly. It's medieval society. Early 20th century, New York.

Yeah, this guy, I would buy this being like Renaissance era. Sure. And then the babies just perfectly land and you just happen to come out at night and pick them up. And he's just, oh, wow, This is a surprise.

The baby's here. But, and here's where it gets complicated. They would freeze the doubt. Here's where it gets worse. The first guy who gets a baby says, uh, looks like my boss is who. Yep.

And that's, we're making jokes for the adults in the room. So nobody needs it. But also like with the stork, that joke doesn't make sense. Like in, in the delivery room, that joke makes sense.

No, no, but this makes perfect sense, Steve, because the boss who comes into the, the adult, alterist wife who. Yeah, sure.

Presumably. Presumably. And then your evil store comes down and says, pay me my price. And he extracts the, the egg that has now been fertilized by Boss Who and they take it up to heaven to shit out this

this baby and throw it onto a, uh, what is it? A umbrella. Pay me my price. And it'll be very nice. Right. Well, there it is. Great one.

I think it's sadder than that. I think the fucking job was automated and the stork is out of fucking work. Oh, wow. Bezos got in there, man. They just like, Bezos. Amazon Baby factory. Bezos has got a dirigible above Whoville. He's got all these umbrellas with the baby.

And it's one guy in a fucking diaper. Not allowed to take a break. He's just shitting his pants. Exactly. It's like this is probably the Grinch's brother that, you know, been taken away from society. Because, like, where are the presents coming from? It would have to be a super Amazon. Well, no, there's actual Santa Claus

at this movie. Yeah, we see Santa come and go really quickly. We don't see a face, though, right? So we don't know that he looks like a who. Also, though, it's important, unless I got this detail wrong, this baby delivery thing happens every year on Christmas Eve. Ew.

Christmas Eve baby delivery. So everybody has the same birthday? That's the weirdest fucking thing I've ever heard. But nobody celebrates it because they're too fucking busy fucking Christmas's mouth. Or maybe. Christmas started because everyone was born that day. It's like the birth of Earth.

Oh, wow. So every who is Christ? And also, why is there this anti-consumerist message if there is a Santa Claus and they're not even paying for this shit? Yeah, what are they even buying? Fucking Santa Claus is going to give you presents tomorrow. Well, they're also they spend the first like 45 minutes of this movie walking around buying presents.

Bill Irwin in like the first four scenes he's in is walking around with the gifts everywhere. Again, because they're double dipping, man. Right? They get they buy their presents and then Santa gives them presents. Oh, you slabs. You pigs! I'm not

giving anyone any presents. You've bought them all. Sike! He just flies away. He just flinging shit at every house. Enjoy your crackages. Enjoy your packages. He pours coal on the entire town. Lights a match and throws it out of the sleigh

as he leaves. Burns them all alive. I like this. But so Who heard of it? Yes. It has to go to the other nine realms of fucking whatever the fucking goddamn bull shit. There should be a portal to other worlds in this.

Nine realms. That's that horse shit movie that's coming out. Oh, that Nurt Cracker? The Not Burton. This is a Not Burton in a big way as well. So wait, Nutcracker has multiple realms. There's multiple realms. Morgan Fried will tell you all about it.

And there must be multiple. He could just go to another snowflake. and he's got a whole other town. No, you can't hop snowflakes, man. So there's a localized Santa for each snowflake. God, what a nightmare. And then there's one for the regular planet where the snow is occurring on.

It's very complicated. The whole inner universe thing. There's infinite possibilities and infinite Santa Claus. That means, yes, there would probably be a black Santa Claus. Sorry, Megan Kelly. Exactly. God damn, that racist sack of shit. Go to her Twitter page, man. holy fuck you could have saw that coming

Santa Claus was white period because she's fucking a sack of shit man I don't know she made a boatload of money off NBC for no reason as we record this she just got canned she's still walking away with like 60 million dollars

what a fucking scam 69 million and she used to go and sign somewhere else for probably back to Fox she'll be on RT or something maybe not Fox probably RT I think she can get bumped down to RT a little bit maybe she can go on Info Wars

Oh, dude. Reshape their image. That would be something. A different kind of crazy. Where is he even broadcasting? Is it like that fucking part in the Simpsons where Krusty's in that weird shack and he's got a fucking scorpion and a gas tank or whatever's going on? I think it's like cramps last

tape. Yeah. Oh my God. Yes, please. Yes, please that movie. But so, but what is the Grinch? She pops out of the stork. These very nice lesbians pick them up and they're like oh my God, what is this thing? but they love him anyway, which is...

He's, you know, I think here's what it was. The fucking baby factory was abomin. We're running that machine overtime. Somebody forgot to, like, clean it one day. Oh, spoiled semen. Yeah, dude, some sort of like rot got in there. And it was like the fly machine. It was like a baby, like the baby making materials for Whoville.

And then like mold got in it though. And that's how the Grinch was born. This is the only time I'm ever going to say this, but this should be more like bright. where like there is a mix like there's different creatures everywhere there should be a blue guy a pink guy

you know that weird that is something and elves and elves and elves but and Will Smith did anyone see the most inappropriate part of this movie

that's about to happen it happens on Christmas night it's like okay I think actually no that's right the lesbians don't find him yet he just gets dumped off nowhere and he's like crawling around

like a monstar yeah and he looks like oh go ahead you first he looks like looks inside of a window. Yeah. And they're having this raucous party. You saw this.

Oh, yeah. Oh, yes. I know exactly where we going. I saw us the Gordon Weaver right there. They're having this raucous fucking who party. And there is a fucking fishbowl that all these whos are throwing their keys into. Which means it's a who key party in a family fucking moving. It's outrageous.

And honestly, good for them. Good for them for cutting loose on Christmas Eve. I mean, they all look the same anyway, these whoos. It doesn't even matter. Then we're really surprised about how these Who children look different. Yeah, that's my boss, of course. Because I fucked him last week.

I mean, they need to have Who rubbers or whatever. Who rubbers? Cindy Loub. Puts on a Richard Nixon mask. Oh, my God. I don't know. We watch that. It's a great movie.

Yeah, no, that's because that's the thing, right? It's like once those lights go down. Mm-hmm. Yeah, just feel around. Exactly. I mean, maybe that's why Christine Brandsky is still single. Is she just, goes to all these who parties all the time

gets it out of the system. Yeah, totally. Who needs a man? She's probably like independently wealthy. Like she's like... Yeah, you don't need someone. Why don't get tied down? Barking at you every day? No thanks. This baby Oh, yeah. It looks like the razor head baby. But side note, they should be

fucking dogs at that party because they all have weird noses that look like dogs. I'm not going to listen to another joke about zoo from you ever. I'm not listen. I'm just saying goofy might be involved. Okay.

The goof troop, dude. But got late last night, Mick was blowing through Whoville. And boy, was I blowing. One of the nine realms. I'm going to go get my nuts crack now. Gork. Gorsh, I lost my key in this bowl. I don't even know who was blowing me at the end of the night, Mick.

Christine Baranski was choking me. There were guys then. gals there, Mick. It was pretty awesome. I gagged on Lou Who. Oh, man. I could see Mickey Mouse in like a robe open with this junk hanging out being like the king of the party.

Like, no, everyone. That's a burgundy satin rope if I've ever heard it. The Grinch definitely has a sexy bathrobe in this movie. He does. We'll get there an hour. Good point. No, but he, so he's disgusting looking. He's this

goopy, disgusting it's an animatronic nightmare. Good way to put it. It looks, it's honestly like a gross version of the Maguire puppet. Yes, yeah. That's what, yeah. And then it turns into this

this actor as a kid actor, as a little person actor actually playing him as a kid. Yes, this was the actor that was on the short-lived soap opera Passions. Oh, here. I believe he played a real-life doll. What?

Yeah, it was like one It was one of them like crazy soap operas Oh my God Not like those down-to-earth soap operas It was like ghosts and goblins Imagine being like such an old sad woman Oh, the little, the living doll is a Oh, it's passions

Oh, I live for passions What, it's canceled? What, I'm dead I'm dead now Now all I have to wait for is ghost chipped beef So he's made fun of in school by fat Jeffrey Tambor baby kid Oh right

And like there's like sexy Christine Bernski Like she's like the kid is like flirting with everybody The girl And she's hot for the Grinch She's hot for the Grinch She's like ooh the Grinch and it's muscles And like this poor kid actress has to say this shit It's disgusting

Flirtier No, no do a flirtier What fucking disgusting Pellum Parkway dude did Ron Howard. Bring on the set with that impression. I was about to say that was a weird Ron Howard. No, when he directs kids, yeah,

fucking dirty, do it a little flirtier. Come on. I don't see that. No, no, look. Sweetheart, what you do is you want the Grinch. You know what that means. Don't let me, don't make me go to jail by telling you what that means, but you know what that means. Look, the audience needs to know that you could hypothetically fuck, okay?

That's what they need to know. Now, do the seat again and do it right. no one gets lunch I directed fucking Apollo 13 all right I know what I'm fucking talking about I'm Richie fucking Cunningham this is my director voice

well that's a cut everybody oh my god what a horror oh lord so but whatever we get this like sort of bully shaving

yeah well he's like it's he's got a he's got a crush on her she's got a crush on him but he timbor's got his eyes on her so he and tambour's making fun he's like you're so hairy you're so fucking disgusting so we get this weird todd solid scene where he has to shave his face and transform to like get with this girl yeah and then he gets bullied even more and then he like brutally crawls up this mountain this kid crawling up the mountain it's a weird scene man it's weird and it's also like who would have guessed that the the grinch put himself into exile. Yeah. So he runs away from home and

Steve, your favorite characters don't give a fuck. They never look for him. They don't give a shit. That's very true. They should be like... Oh, the cat ran away. Green cat we sent to school. They're both like blinded and drunk.

I like it. I like a lot of it. That'd be great if that's why the Grinch ran away was they kept trying to stuff tuna fish in his mouth and make him shit in a box. Oh, the talking cat keeps trying to tell me he's a little boy. Mommy, stop. Mommy, oh, you stop your whining.

Hold on. We're going to have to neuter him. That's how you feed a who cat. All who cats have to be forced fast. Yeah, absolutely. They won't feed themselves. Oh, meow, meow, meow. I'm dying.

Whatever. So she learns this story through a series of interviews on the Who Real podcast network. with Ira Glass Who. I mean, isn't it National Hublick Radio? I'm telling you, and you're right at that button

and you can swish. He's on fire. I wouldn't piss on him. We see how the Grinch lives in exile. And I want to talk about this because he's just sitting around now remember,

we're making like an adaptation of a children's book he's just sitting around in the nude in this ratty like Fraser's dad recliner chewing glass what are we doing

like why can't he just be eating like a stinky sandwich goat dude he's part goat goats aren't eating glass cans that's not glass can is a metal glass

and it's very similar I mean trash pickers we got we got these people like people who just live off of what's left but the way they have he's got like a little arms for the whomeless

it's a guy in at Santa Claus he with a bell arms for the homeless they all have dead on who's Skid Row but we skipped over like all like he so the last time we see him he's like what 10?

Yes and then we jumped to him as like a 35 40 year old I would assume Oh this Grinch is middle age. Something to that effect. Yeah. And like, he's got this expertise. He's been building these machines and this is where the jigsaw thing comes in. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's got all these weird

fucking contraptions. Mostly, it seems to torture the dog. Yeah, dude, there is some severe animal abuse in this movie. But I feel like if we really, like, if you peel back max in air quotes, it's really like max eight. You know what I mean? Yeah, but the Grinch doesn't

acknowledge it though. Exactly. I've had the same dog for 25 years. He needed to get somebody to replace the Yeti. Oh, did you think he fucked the Yeti? To death. Showed up my green racket. She divorced me. I don't know what to do anymore, Max.

It's like, this is like if Jigsaw, like, owned a Batcave. Yeah. Because this is, like, a massive, like, fortress of solitude that he lives in. Yeah. Very weird. And he's doing, and this is the height of Jim Carrey vamping. Just go, just go, Jimmy. Because it's just him on set. It's him and a fuck a dog.

He'll be damned if that dog is going to steal his spotlight. And he's just doing it all. He's dancing. He's talking. He's doing like echo bits. He's doing, he prank calls Jeffrey Tambor at one point because he hasn't had enough of like fucking with the town. And this is where he is leaving a voicemail to somebody.

And he says that he's going to gut them like a fish. Yeah. Just fine for your kids. Dude, that's dialogue from scream. That's a fucking crime. You can't call somebody so you're going to gut them like a fish. Again, jigsaw.

There we go. I think he's a murderer. And you also can't mail pipe bobs to Hillary Clinton. That also is a crime, FYI. Yeah, way to go, Grinch. Well, crooked hollery. He's on fire. That actually didn't happen.

Yeah, this is Alex Hu. Yeah, Alex, who is right. Fuck that guy. Who for wars? Draft. Those are fake bombs and Catch him in bed with a who. With a Grinch, dude.

Grinch is very close. We got these, uh, we got green people coming up from the border. There's a caravan of green people. I have this right in front of me. It's a caravit of green people. A thousand miles from the border up in a Crumpet Mountain. They're coming down. They're coming down the Grumpet Mountain.

Here is dog bone powder that you can buy that will help your fitness, I'm sorry, your hootness routine. And now, yep, I'm just getting some reports that in the caravan there's also members of Hussis. The Grinch-based

Islamic military force. Oh, yeah, and we have confirmation now that Husses has teamed up with, what's that? Oh, that's right. Yeah, M.S. Houtin. Oh, well, the Grinch stole Christmas. Well, imagine. Imagine my shot. Yeah, there's a war on Christmas.

Thank you, Paul Joseph Hootson. He's eating garbage. That's right. I am on my lunch break and I appreciate you not to comment on it right at this time. Oh, what else. I forgot my kids.

Put that on his grave. Eat more who chili. Oh, dude, Christmas chili. Yes, some slow-cooked, like, pressure cooker, who chili? That's what it is, dude. They sacrifice one town member every Christmas. Chop that person up, and that's for the who stew. Well, that's the thing.

It's very Wickerman-esque, this whole situation. You've got fucking Jeffrey Tambor as the unquestioned leader of the universe. Absolutely. And we're reading from the book of who, which I think only he has access to. Oh, he only sees those gilded pages? I think so. I don't know. They're not in like every

who tell on the highway. He's got the original text. There was no Houdians yet to place those Bibles or the what was it called? The who? The Gideons. You know, no, but the book.

The book of who? Thank you. Thank you. That's what I was looking for. We were looking for the book of who. So after reading about his whole story, I mean, by the way, Jim Carrey is just vaping for 40 minutes.

It's useless. It's most of the fucking movie. After reading about learning about his sad story, there's this big thing about who is going to be the holiday cheermeister. It's a big town thing. I think this is the person

who gets sacrificed, F.W. This is the guy that gets the helmet of bees. Yeah, they get a guy, they get an old fucking virgin policeman. They make sure they trick him into coming to town, an old virgin who policeman. And they're just, you know,

oh God, no! Oh, God, no! Who are you? They can't agree on the nose, though, of the wicker man. Oh, yeah, that's a tough one. The hooker man, I guess. So, but no, so it's a holiday cheermeister. It's an unspecified, really honorific.

And someone, what are you getting, like, the key to the city? It's just, you get, I don't even know. Like, I guess. Bragging rights. It's like that stupid thing at eight crazy nights, like everyone from the town probably gets it at one point kind of a day. Oh, God, yes. Speaking of previous Christmas movies we've done. Cindy nominates the Grinch

of the fucking town is a gas Why does she get to Is it like her year to nominate? It's just like who do we want to nominate And she's the first one who says it And then like it's like it's like I just need an answer from the audience Just a suggestion real quick

Oh wait no one said anything I heard Grinch I guess so Someone's just like my asshole I nominate my asshole No sir we've done that last year go on I heard the Grinch in front No so but she comes up

But he's like well you can't have the Grinch And they're going back and forth This is what he's like looking in the book of who And making shit up which is creepy as all hell Oh absolutely dude He is trying to keep these people on the fucking compound This whole Who experiment is hanging by a thread Thanks to this little girl

Oh by the way in the book here It says we're all living on a snowflake Better better drink this fucking Who's down man Massacre. Who's Angel's cult? Whose gate?

The Hoopop comic. Just a helicopter shout of all these dead hoo. All right, this Christmas, we're all going to have special punch this year. Come on up here, darling. Yeah, that's all right. No, it's safe. Listen, everybody, we're all safe here. Just drink this

Ulaid. Does everybody come on up? Everybody get a cup. They're just listening to like some fucking haunting audio recording of a mass suicide? I'm just going to go and make sure the Senator Bob Who takes off all right in his plane. Oh my God. He's going to make sure about that.

Great moments in Who history. But after much bullshit, she wins. You know what I mean? She outsmarts Jeffrey Tambourke, because she's the cutest little angel in the whole darn movie. She's totes adorbs, dude.

She does have a fucking song, which is like for what Where are you, Chris? Holy shit. I think I'm dying. And it's like you either have a musical or you don't. And she just can't start singing. That's what I was confused about

because when she starts singing, I was like, I didn't remember this being a musical, but it's not. Well, because you know they're going to have to sing at the end so they can just throw it in wherever and it quote unquote makes sense. It doesn't have to come back around. Just sing at the end because it's when I'm fucking halfway out the theater.

So she goes up to Grinch Mountain to find him and tell him he's going to be the Crumpet Mountain, God damn it. Get your hoogeography right. We're almost where the movie starts, folks. Don't worry. I just can't even believe there is all this fucking grab ass before we are stealing Christmas. Before we even think to steal Christmas. He's living with the crampus, right?

Yes, absolutely. Domestic partnership. They have different parts of the cave. Common law. spouse. I didn't want to do it, but it kicked in after 12 years. Did you kill any kids yet? Oh, nagging, crampus back at the cave. You always say you're going to do it, but you never do it. You're so weak. I'm going to get out there and show you what it's like. No, no, no, no. Just give you one more day. I'll kill all the kids. I promise. Stay back. Stay back, crampus.

well, honey. Shandhi Loo, get out of here. I'm blinking very fast. I need you to, honey, I need you to go down the mountain. It's not safe for you here. You're taking the garbage out tomorrow. Yeah, I like that he gives her a five-minute head start. So she sneaks into his house. There's more Jim Carrey vamping. She's like, hey man, you should, you should be the holiday cheermeister this year. It's a great big award. And like, the other thing,

about the Grinch in this iteration is he's very vain he's very greedy you know he has a lot oh I see what you say oh yeah yeah he has a line to her where he goes run for your life before I kill again

like he's terrorizing this little early's trying to and she's oddly just standing standing they're like dead faced and he is just naked in this house next to this girl man it's not all right he also says I'm a psycho oh and this is oh a classic we could not make this movie without doing this the temptation was just too fucking great this grinch has to break the fourth wall to just go kids today oh yes so desensitized

by movies and television yeah oh come on television or movies in this fucking universe who what is the entertainment besides staring at a christmas tree show me w who bc but it's w who bc oh my god come on now who we're Stern, you've got to say the call signs of the radio station. He puts on a t-shirt just to rip it off in this scene as well. Yes, yeah, which is... So this is another clothing is a thing. It's just so strange that he's just naked this entire time.

So she's like, come on, do it. And he's like, wow, I could really stick it to the town. If I win, I could win the prize. And he's doing like a weird dance. So this is wanting to understand that. Like, she nominates him. But so that's not like instant winning. Like, do people vote for him?

is this those challenges that he had to do later in the movie? He wins, but he has to show up to get it. Oh, he's literally, all he has to do receive this award is show up in town. Then we get a whole like montage kind of thing of him like, well, if I don't have anything good to wear I'm not going to go. This is where there's a fucking thing that hits like a thud is

he's walking around in a pair of like lower part of your body clothing that's not pants and she goes like, oh, it's a, you're wearing a dress or whatever. The dog barks, she leaves. She leaves. Oh, it's God, so he's talking to a dog

That's even worse This is full David Berkowitz right now Yeah, that's right The dog barks and he's like, it's not a dress, it's a kilts sicko Yeah And then like he fucking like goose steps out of the frame It's just like someone had to turn that camera off

He is John Cleese walking this whole movie, isn't he? He kind of is, yeah, you're right And this is by the way, it doesn't matter But this is where he murders the yodeler It's crazy like he's like I guess I won't wear anything And then he hears a yodeler and then like, he uses a cane to get this yodler

and the yodeler's dead. Like, it's fucking amateur nut at the Apollo except they threw him off a mountain. And then he steals his leaderhosen, I guess, is the idea. So, like, you, once you, the greatest thrill I ever had in killing was to take their clothes

and put their underwear on afterwards. So he winds up going to this fucking thing. And he sort of like makes a grand entrance. Yeah, because he shows up late and tambour's like, well, if the if Grinch is incoming I'll take the prize and he's like not going to attend and then the dog

like pulls this trap door and he goes out like a garbage shoot or something shit. Great dog acting the entire time. Yeah this little old girl put it put it all all out there on film. Thank you Frank Welker. Yes, Welker totally voicing the dog. You're right. Thank you for reminding me.

We all got Welkered. We didn't even know it. Do you think Ron Howard like directed Frank Welker in the booth or is that like director five? I think I think it was like a, like Ron called up really quickly to the recording studio in Welker's Golden Mansion. Gotcha. And it was just like, you know what, Frank, you know what to do. I, you know, thank you a lot, bud.

That's why I'm leaving you in the trusted hands of my good friend from Palham. All right, fucking Welker. Let's bark like a dog. Come on. No, you're a scared dog right now. Come on. I don't fucking got all day. Look, oh, what do I got here?

Oh, look. Here's a T-bone steak. Bob for me, Welker. Oh, excuse me. was the performance of hydrant and why you're pissing all over it? Take it from the top. This is my favorite moment in the movie

because he fucking shoots out this garbage tunnel and is sort of like pinballing all over the town. He's like bouncing off of flags and shit. And he lands face first in Christine Beranski's bosom and fucking motorboatser. Just right there for the world to see.

That's the only reason he fucking emerged was for jack material. That's the whole thing. I'll show up tonight. I'll be able to hold on to it. Snapshot. A little bit of the ultraviolence. The in-out, in-out.

I remember the cleavage smell for years. Oh, yeah, exactly, dude. And this is after, speaking of other jokes, not for kids, he's, like, bitching about, like, whether or not the festivities are going to have a cash bar. So the Grinch is drinking?

Well, that's the other thing, too. He's, like, beating himself up. I'm like, when this Grinch discovers alcohol for, because he'll be a raving alcohol. Oh, yeah. I mean, if you're living up in a mountain. Oh, yeah. That sounds like horse to me.

That doesn't sound, no, like any... He's drinking horse? Oh, no. Right, okay. I got you. I got you. Hey, Grinch. Mr. Grinch,

you're going to be the holiday. Oh, no, he's dead. It's just like fucking needle, a hot needle outside of his arm. Oh, yeah, dude. Behind the fucking Whoville bar. Oh, no, it's like, before the devil knows you're dead.

He goes to one of those. tiny who's. He goes inside with those houses. One of the tiny who shoots him up. He should have went on Huthadone. The little who is walking around in an open row. Yeah, exactly. He's doing Hourouin.

Oh, Lord. But no, so whatever. And like he decides he's a holiday cheermeister. And this is when this movie gets really, this movie is so obnoxious and so gross. But then they're like, you won and what you win to be the holiday cheermeister. This is again, like, fucking Wicker Man shit's like, you get to judge the pudding contest

and they're shoving shit in this mouth and it's like a scene from Salo. It's fucking disgusting. They fucking cut out his tongue and shove shit down his throat. Absolutely. It's nuts. It's just like all this shit's dribbling out.

Dude, there is, it's also. So the thing is like he's the taste tester of all these different kinds of holiday treats including one category that you better fucking believe is called the fudge dump. And they're shoving fucking fudge in this little mouth of them. Imagine the fudge dump after that.

It's not coming out, Max. Max, I do I send to God. Max get the Tums. There's a Tums under the sink, Max. Gonna need a Hunama. He's heating up. And so then, like, he passes all this shit, and he's, like, a sore winner.

He's going around like, oh, fuck you, I want, fuck you, you're fucking dead to me. I want. And by the way, it doesn't even include stuff that's even not Christmas related like Potato Sack races and shit. Oh, that's right.

This is just padding the run time. Yes. Yep. Big time, dude. Because again, we're nowhere near stealing Christmas, man. Dude, 80 minutes. You could have done this in 80 minutes.

It's not how the Grinch stole Christmas is. When does the Grinch steal Christmas? When? Tell me when. This movie should be called Maybe the Grinch will steal Christmas. Really leave the audience in anticipation. That's why I think

they're just calling the new one, the Grinch. Yeah. We don't got to deal with it. Yeah, we could let him fuck around all he wants. Although I saw runtime, 88 minutes for that. That's what I want. Right run time. Absolutely. So maybe they'll learn some lessons here. So when does it turn into Christine?

Oh, that's right. So like he's, when does he turn on the town? Because like, it's all going great. It's right here. The mayor. Yeah, Tambor proposes marriage. Oh, right. And she accepts and the Grinch's fucking green Dick goes back inside him. But not only that, it's like, well, you'll get

married to me and you'll get this brand new car furnished from, like, courtesy of the taxpayers. Yeah, that's what it is. Yeah. And they all go like, yay! Because they're all at the mayor's fucking dumb rallies every week. Yeah, they're just going to MAGA, MAGA. Well, they're

definitely, I mean, look at the size of town. They're all going to that fucking wedding. Oh, yeah, absolutely. And that's enough of, you know, free roast beast for everybody. They're doing the reception at the Knights of Hulumbus Hall. it will never stop oh it's never never to stop we're in triple digits

the counter is broken so he he has a fucking he has a a ba-b-da-ba shit I lost it he has a fucking freak he has a mental fucking freak out yes it's not Christine

what's the fucking Brian de Palma movie there's a lot of them no the the Stephen King Brian DePalma movie That's not Brian De Palma. That's John Carpenter. Oh, Carrie, you're talking. Carrie is, oh.

Well, you confuse me by saying Christine. No, I know. That's why I got the mixed up. Carrie. Carrey is when Stephen King and Brian DePalma met. Yes. But he does have that. No!

No! And he's freaking out. And of course, because it's fucking Jim Carrey, he's got to do a butt stuff gag. Yep. And he's like, you know what I love? Is Michel Toe. And he grabs it and shoves it up his grinch ass. Yeah, he definitely does.

And then he bends over people like, fucking. Kiss it. Kiss it out of my dirty green little asshole. Do it. Hey, kids. Your parents bought a ticket for my green asshole. He also scratches the car.

Oh, that's right. He's got like, because he's wearing his fucking furry gloves. Daddy, should I shove mistletoe up my bum? No, son. No, Ceree, Bob.

This is also his freakout right here, or I guess maybe it's right before the freak out. It's a total trailer move. I think this is one, because when he goes somebody's fabulous and you're just like could somebody stop this

can somebody just turn off please oh you know somebody stop him is what I said somebody stop him he fucking burns down the Whoville Christmas tree by the way and they all almost have their hearts explode inside their little hoochess he steals a little car from one of the tiny

people and this driving around and he yells burn baby burn and then makes a Hindenburg joke. Good night everybody. Oh, the humanity. It's like he's on we hate movies all of a sudden. You mean who hate movies? But what's great about the Hindenberg joke is that establishes

that because the Hindenburg was actually a Zeppelin from Nazi Germany Hooshenberg. Before we before it Huberned down you know, we weren't at war with them yet so the idea that Houdrogen blew up. Yes, yes, yes. But the idea that there would be

who Nazis that would would make a Zeppelin that would crash in Who Jersey it's amazing you're right it's all coming together does that mean I'm gonna I'm gonna I'm gonna give Eric Siska the assistant was there a hoolocast or what

because he said of course well actually the numbers are severely inflated I'm kidding that's Alex who of course there was a hoolocast this is also this is also another

fucking ridiculous thing that doesn't need to be in this goddamn G-rated family film is the Grinch, for whatever reason this is where he gets the little car because he tries to hail a cab and it drives past him and he goes, it's because I'm green, isn't it?

What the flying fuck are we doing? And this is like months or something after Danny Glover had that really publicized thing of like, I'm Danny Glover and I can't get a cab in New York City and now the fucking Grinch is having fun. Was that in the year 2000? It was somewhere around there, yeah.

Wow. God, it seems like, I don't know. I don't remember when that happened. I thought it was like more reason than 2000. I'm pulling it up. But then it's a, so like he commits this fucking terrorist attack on this town and then leaves. And like before the, you know, the cinders are done smoldering, it's Anthony Hopkins comes back in to be like, all right, now that was all right, now that was all just bullshit stuff I was telling you. Now the movie's going to actually start.

here comes the plan to steal Christmas all right everybody stay in your seats brief intermission we're going to steal Christmas coming right up and someone in the town because they're all freaking out oh Tony Hopkins by the way oh Tony pardon me yes everyone's freaking out about like oh my god look what he did to the town

Christmas is whatever and some guy of course they have a Christmas countdown and this guy's like four hours till Christmas oh no and I was like oh thank God a timeline has started I know that it is almost Christmas and it will now be very close to when it's about to be stolen sure I mean like And, you know, also sometimes people just don't like Christmas, you know?

It's okay not to like Christmas. Leave this man alone. Don't force him to be nominated for this fucking Christmas prize. This movie does really capture how annoying Christmas is. Sure. And how fucking terrible it is. And it's possibly the worst holiday. But it's, it's, people lose people during the year.

Christmas is hard. Christmas is hard for the Grinch. Why do you give a shit? Yeah. That's the real question out here. Leave him alone. Just fucking leave that man alone. leave him alone.

You deserve your Christmas stolen. This is the way you're going to act. This is exactly right. Glad your tree was burned. Yeah, fuck you, who, Bill. So he gets the idea to steal Christmas, much like in the cartoon.

This is where it's the, like, you're a mean one monologue. Yeah. And he's like kind of singing. He's kind of singing it. It's bad news, man. And he basically is like,

like he sees Santa come by. And he's like, oh, good. the little son of a bitch is left. Now I'm going to engineer this plot to destroy their holiday. And it's him like building this sled or whatever. Takes forever. And there's a part here where he's lecturing the dog.

And this I guess I learned from Tribune, trivia, who even knows if it's true? Because I've never seen any behind the scenes footage of him. Who even knows it's true? You're right. Who knows? Where he's got the hat on and he's like directing the dog. And he was apparently mimicking Ron Howard's directing style right here.

I watched some behind the scene stuff on the way up here. really? Oh shit. Oh, who tell? On YouTube. Continue. Was it anything related to that scene? I just went out of my way to tell that joke. Oh, you weren't even actually doing it. You were just lying to set up a joke. God, I love that. I love that. Steve, leave it to the professionals. Please. He's

being a jerk. Yes, I am. Oh, also, so he's getting the rockets. This is another, what the fuck are they thinking? He's getting like the rockets ready on the sled or whatever. Rocket? No, not the I think he's wearing Panster. You got a picture of Christine Boranski getting the fucking Green Rocket going? He's

fucking sitting on this sled and it's vibrating. And he's like, that feels good. Oh, it's haunting. It is. And it's so he starts to steal Christmas, right? And we've got Anthony Hopkins doing the whole book

and he's like, so this is, he's reading from here now? Yeah, yeah. I'm not that I've ever actually read it. I've seen the cartoon, but I never read the cartoon, yeah, but the cartoon's basically the thing. Yeah, it's like word for word. Yeah, yeah. Okay. So, and he's going through and he's taking the thing and he's, you know, he goes into the house, he steals all the stuff and

Cindy Lou Who wakes up and it also doesn't make sense. Because in the book it's, and they have no prior relationship. No. He just pretends to be Santa Claus and she's like a little kid. She doesn't know shit about shit. Right. But now he has to like hide his face. Oh, right. He's hiding behind the tree.

And he's like, oh, I'm Santa Claus. little girl. I definitely don't smell like diapers and banana peels and all kinds of shit. There's a weird thing in this montage of like breaking into the houses and whatever where like he

sets these moths free. And like for this movie, this is not a cheap movie. They have like insane set design here. These moths are like the worst CGI little creatures. Second worst to the termites on his teeth. Oh, right.

That's a line in the song. It's like, you've got termites and your smile, Mr. Grange. And when he does that, they show it. And it's just like brown C.G.I. horseshit crawling all over his mouth. Oh, God. Yeah, you're right.

Fucking the mummy. Stephen Summers, the mummy. He's going to open his mouth. All these termites are going to pop out. What's the thing? I made a note of this because it fucking horrified me. But in this montage, as he's like really getting going

and stealing the holiday from the town. There's this moment where, like, it's the Grinch's face like superimposed over the rest of the action and it's spinning really fast and he's just laughing. Oh, God. It's fucking bone-chishol.

It's something out of like a Vincent Price movie. It's bone-chilling. It's just spinning really fast and he's like, ah-rah-ha-ha. It's actually very close to the mask. It feels like a mask joke. Somebody stop him.

I mean, well, he's really out of control at this point because he's stealing the who hash he's stealing the Hukane Right He's searching He's the Hu Juana Talk about a green Christmas dude

He steals all their food Oh no Wake up Wake up Lee Marvin Hu He stole our hash A stash I can't believe He stole all my stuff

We're gonna fucking Cut his balls out Put him with his green mouth Hey Grinch I'm going to chew out Your throat that's what you think oh man

so then this is crazy and it's kind of great and I kind of appreciate the Grinch for this is like he hauls all this shit back up to the top of Mount Crumpit yeah well no we're missing a bunch here he visits Christine Baranski

and Jeffrey Tambor we need to talk about both of those oh let's go for it let's go for it I'm sorry yes so go for it did we mention about the does this happen here with the hair or is that I might have been at the the hair

he shaves Jeffrey Tambor head a little bit. Oh, yeah. That was during the terrorist attack. Yes, that was during the terrorist attack where he burns the tree. And this is this couple has been terrorized already. That's what I wanted to establish. Burning a tree in Hooville is not unlike burning across in Alabama. Am I wrong here or what? Well, they love Arbor Day. It's a, it's a symbol man. It's a fucking move. Oh, dude, yeah, that's a power play by the Grinch. Strike him where it hurts. This is worse. This is for speciality we're talking about here. So,

I don't know. What does he do? He goes to Christine Branski's first. He steals like the gem from her for one thing. Pantry rain. Doesn't it smell her or something? He does something weird. He's probably sniffing around. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, he already had the motorboating. He's just watching her sleep for a while. It's gross.

Maybe he's like a fucking, maybe he's a geek squad or he puts a little webcam in there just to make sure. I installed a toilet cam before I left. She's doing spooops. watch of the school who's the girl who's the girls oh yes he's going through a garbage eating it oh god oh Jesus what does he do to Jeffrey Tambor though I don't remember this is the most important part of the movie

okay so Jeffrey Tambor is talking in his sleep he's a big cartoon character and he's like oh one day Martha Mayhew I'm gonna kiss you on the mouth I'm gonna kiss you and then like the Grinch comes and he's like Oh, you want to kiss me? Oh, I'm a lady. You want to kiss me? Yes, I do.

And he puts the dog, he takes the dog. Did you pass out? I think I did. I don't remember this part of it. I'm sorry, I was watching it really late last night. I remember sneaking into Christine Baranski's room. He steals her engagement ring from Jeffrey Tambor. And I got nothing on this.

Perfect movie to green out to. He was just tired out, by the way. I want to kiss you so bad. And then like, he's like, yeah, you'll kiss me. He takes the dog this. real dog, Kelly, the actress. Yes. And he puts the dog's ass on his face. Oh, my God. I don't

fucking remember. And you hear like, and you, the dogs. He's tongueing it? He's tonguing it? The dog's eyes bulge out cartoonishly, like CGI eyes bulge out. Like, something goes in this dog's ass. Do you know, canine toss salad? Yes. Yeah. Way out past the breakers.

I have not. We're talking about watching the world die. I've got kids here and you're tonguing a dog. asshole. And I love you know, this is a good time to bring this up so late. Greece or what's her name? Gice is the widow who, the widow

Seuss. Right. Was like super protective of all of his stuff forever. Like Seuss never wanted to, or Grice, the actual guy never wanted to sell his shit. Right. He died and then like she was like coming around to it. She's like, all right, you know, if you pitch me, it's a million dollars, like this incredible thing. A million

dollars just for the privilege of pitching? Something like that. Yeah. And then she ended up selling it for 5 million and 4% of the box office. So it turned it to be like 18.5 million or something, but then she also got a lot of the merchandising and book tie

and stuff. Wow. But Jill, remember, that is considerably less than Megan Kelly got for saying she loves blackface. That's absolutely true. Let's keep that mind. But it's amazing. So what, did this movie like make the fucking, did they pull the plug from the dam? Because cat in the hat,

then the Horton, here's who animated movie? fire sale with this widow once that corpse was cold enough she fucking oh is he in the ground good fucking four million and nine points on the back and do it do it make that fucking movie got a lorax in the back

paramount here what do I got one fish two fish what do you want here I got it all right blue fish you got it all right yeah you want to hop on pop I got that what do you need what do you need I found all these abandoned stories you can make all okay this one's called first reform

but there were apparently certain stuff in this script that she had vetoed because she had like approval on that type of stuff. Apparently there was more sexual innuendo that there ended up being. Yeah. There was a joke about besides the Grinch, the only other people who shunned

Christmas with a whosteins. Yeah. And she was like and this 90 year old woman has to be like, that's not progressive at all, Ron Howard. Does fucking Tucker Carlson have a screen credit on this? What the fuck? But like, but what I said this now is like, was the widow asleep?

Like, maybe you know why? Because it's not, it's not really dialogue related. Maybe it wasn't in the script. It's like in the script, you know, that the old broad was going to read. It's like, he goes into Jeffrey Tambor and he like makes him kiss the dog's face. And then like Ron Howard, like, I got a better idea. Turn that page upside down. Make sure the, take the widow out to a nice dinner and then we'll shoot, we'll shoot the dog.

scene. Make sure she's away. I was going to say, it does, I just thought of the Seinfeld scene. Triptophan. Exactly. Just a nice feed that widow turkey. Some more boxed wine, granny. Oh, you're going to eat a dog's asshole

tonight, Tambor, that widow is asleep. Another thing, she said, like, the actor who portrays the Grinch had to be of the caliber of Jack Nicholson, Dustin Hoffman, Robin Williams, or Jim Carrey, so she kind of cast this movie. That's amazing. I can't see

any of them doing it, but Jim Carrey. No. How about Jack? Jack could have done it in the early 90s, in his Joker days. You know what I mean? Cindy Lou, who the fuck cares? It might be better, dude. Like, I can... A real surly gray. You need

me on that mountain. Exactly. Like, I think it would really, like, I could buy him hating Christmas. Jim Carrey's just vamping. Take these two blocks of who fudge and stick them between your knees. I guarantee you they cut a fucking Grinch baby at the end of it.

I cannot believe that I totally fell asleep during this scene. That's at the end of the original the Jack Nicholson version was he goes out to after, you know, he learns everything. Right. He's about to sit down for that big banquet and he's about to cut and he looks at

Cindy Lou Who, and then there's a Christine Baransky, and then there's a logging truck outside? And he's like, I can go to the bathroom. And they're like, well, let's wait for him to come back from the bathroom. And he doesn't come back. And he doesn't come back. And previously in that movie, you see him playing piano on the back of a pickup truck stuck in a traffic jam. And then he goes into room 237 and a Christmas tree

comes out of the bathtub. And he starts dancing with it. But then it gets set on fire. It would be awesome, then because then at the end of the movie, he falls off the top of crumpin mountain and then like the last shot is him laying at the base of the mountain and his fucking teeth fell next to him and it's just, ay, aye, aye, aye, aye, aye,

Christmas. And then we we get the haunting music and we pan out to an old photo of the Whoville Christmas ball from 1920 and he was the cheermeister or whatever. You were always meant to be the cheermeister. What's that Lloyd? You're saying the N-word while I'm getting a drink.

I just hate Christmas pal He goes up to the mayor I'm gonna tear your head off And shit down your skull Get the Grinch out of this courtroom Dude a Grinch legal procedural You can make it in Whoville You can make it anywhere

Shove smacks down the garbage chute Just like in the phone Those who's they just got a raw deal Just a raw deal There's siphoning water from the Who River. Come here, little Grinch. You put your nose in the wrong place, Mr. Grinch. And it goes on like that.

I was trying to think of what would equate to be the mother and the sister in this scenario. You know, I don't know. Yeah. Maybe Steve's two favorite characters. Well, oh, my lesbian couple. It's progressive. Finally, this movie's a little bit progressive. That's what you're telling yourself.

Yes. Yeah. So he does steal, 30 minutes ago, you're like, oh, when he gets up to the mountain. So that's kind of what he does down in Who town. Right. God, I can't believe I miss that. That is insane.

What, like, a very specific amount of time to miss him. So we're at the top of Who Mountain or whatever, Crumpet Mountain or whatever. And he's got the big fucking, you know, just like in the cartoon and the book, he's got the big sack of all the Christmas presents. And he, with the assistance of this poor dog, like, pulls it up there. Meanwhile, and this is, I love the Grinch, man, because fucking Whoville wakes up on Christmas morning.

And this town goes to a level five head explosion. They are fucking freaking out that Christmas has been robbed. They don't, and they know specifically it's not like, we haven't been robbed on the hole. Like, they didn't take used furniture. We also have our WHO TVs. Just specifically every sign of Christmas is gone and these selfish fuckers are losing it.

I feel like any loose cash in the house was gone, though. I feel like that's also... It was Christmas stuff and loose cash. Right. The money on the dresser is for the cringe. Oh, yeah. If he's taking the WHO hash, he's definitely taking the WHO cash. Change stolen right out of the Who car cup holders. It's just fires everywhere now just randomly.

I'll leave when you open the shape. But no, but this is, and this is something I have a problem with. It's like a thematic difference in the story, in all versions of the story, it's the power of Christmas that wins. Everybody, the Grinch is waiting up there in his evil fucking mountain. He's like, these sons of bitches are going to fucking be crying all night. He's got his dick in his hands. And he's like, here it is. It's going to get hard in a second.

Going to start pumping any second. You watch Christmas. Because they're going to start crying. I'm going to listen to them crying. And then it doesn't happen. singing a beautiful song because the power of fucking Christmas is strong and then commercialism blah blah blah and it's in all of the

Whoville people and they just have that they beat that awful fucking Grinch but in this one everyone's a monster anyway it's like the fucking town of Dogville down there but little fucking baby Cindy Lou is going to be like I know everything is your baby well it's kind of start somewhere man and then Bill

Irwin turns around like immediately he's like no everybody my daughter's right we're all monsters I just think it's better if they just sort of have that inherently Like, that's not what it was about the whole time, man. No, but I prefer that the Grinch just laughs and enjoys them going crazy. I want him to kill the kid. The kid almost dies on the fucking, the mountain of fucking presents.

It turns into that first Journey Harry movie. He's got a fucking sniper rifle on this kid. Oh, I was thinking more of the crow. Oh, I like it. Christmas Day, my new favorite holiday. Fire it up. Fire it. my who favorite holiday

Cindy Lou, why did you swallow this bullet? But so the fucking curse of Christmas is broken, man. Yes, it's true. And there's something, I wrote this note, and I don't know what it means.

I think it's just in like the Christmas chaos. There's a shot of like a little who girl falling in garbage. Oh, I miss that. It was the only time in the movie I got a legitimate laugh. I just wrote,

uh, girl falling in garbage, L.O.L. just to remind myself. So, She goes up to the town to invite him back to the celebration because the celebration is going on

and this is when his heart grows. It's like this weird. He says like weird fucking Glenn Ford Superman heart attack. Dude, he is going down for the count with this heart attack because he's like, he said,

this is where he's like, maybe Christmas doesn't come to store. And just fucking drops dead. And we have real body horror here where the fucking, oh yeah, the heart starts protruding out of the body. Yeah.

And he's screaming, bloody murder. He's just like crying because his heart is like expanding inside his chest cavity. Three sizes, Tony tells us. And Gina Davis is very scared. Dearly beloved. That'd be great if that little guy showed up. He's adorable. Yeah, that dead alien, a dead alien priest from Beetlejuice.

We just rewatched that last weekend. And by the way, great movie. Sure, absolutely. But that little guy, it's great. Like, after all the chaos happens, there is a shot of him, and he's still just standing there like, well, should I go or is there dessert? He's just looking serving to a wedding as a reception is all I'm saying. He does those hands.

The little hand thing, you're like, he's like, well, he does not. And then, like, he kind of fades into the wall, right? I was looking forward to doing the electric slide. Okay, wooky, wookie, wucky, wucky. Not even coffee, huh? all right long ride back to hell all right see you later

there is a moment here where this movie could have taken a fucking great turn though because when he stands back up he's like crying and sobbing and like feeling emotion for the first time it's like happiness but that also like sadness and guilt for all this shit that's just come rushing into his heart

right and he's crying and the sun is rising and he's looking at the sun rising and he's crying and I was like if this dude just threw himself off this mountain right now what a perfect end to this absolutely well that's how he comes back as the crow that's exactly right

and he yells like what is the deal like he doesn't understand what's happening to him right here it's fucking weird so he's like okay and then the the sled

starts to go down the cliff which does happen in every version right but this time to add stakes Sidney Lou who's on it now this kid's gonna die how did she get there

it's a great question she hiked this fucking mountain when above his cave onto this gigantic thing of presence, just because she knew he would have this body horror and then yeah, this transformation was guaranteed.

I want to know how she knew that. Yeah, you're right. I think she's just suicidal. I mean, she lives in that fucking suffocating town. All they give a shit about his Christmas. I get reading that, the book of who for, and seemingly no other books. And it doesn't seem like anyone, like, it's, you're either

the mayor or you're the mailman. I don't know what other job you can have. There's got to be, and it's a pretty sick job probably like Whoville bartender. Oh, I like that. You know what I mean? Because you know they're all secretly, like they're keeping up the guys of like, yeah, we love Christmas. Yeah. But inside it's fucking rotting

them all, like inside out. All you can drink is eggnog. It's just, oh, eggnog. But at least there's rum in it though. Yeah. That bar is fucking Satan Tango, man. That's what it is. It closed the door. And they are there for weeks. I would love it though. Cindy Lou

who like fucking flipped off the front of this thing. and got run over by the Sparkle Motion Coach and Speed just like that lady gets it. Nice. She's like trying to like hold on or something and part of the Grinch's sleigh breaks and she just falls under it.

Or maybe it was cans. It was only cans. Eggnog cans. Ew. So he saves her. Like he lifts the thing over. He gets super strength. Which is weird.

It's weird to see in real life. It's fine for a cartoon. His heart is bigger so it can pump more blood. Oh shit, he's got superhuman strength. That's how it works. That would be pretty cool. That's why cows are so strong. So he goes down to the town.

He's like, hey, guys, sorry I stole your Christmas. It's like too late. You're fucking 10 to 20, man. Exactly. Also, just one last inappropriate adult joke here, kind of. He does like a, because he's like somehow in front of the sled when it goes off a jump or whatever. And he looks like he's doing like a ski jump.

thing, and he goes, spread eagle. Yeah, spread eagle, dude. About what? Oh, God. Look at my foie. Lick at my bullseye. Getting all the snow up my ass. So the cop wants to arrest him.

Or no, Jeffrey Tambor was like, arrest that Grinch. You know, like, you know, that's your scene. And I was like, no, the Grinch ain't so bad. He was willing to be arrested, too. Yeah. And he brought back all the presents. Yeah, he's trying to face the music And like he's in custody or whatever

And then it's crazy because Jack Hooby comes out And he's like, hey Grinchwold And assassinates him Oh, I wish Oh, sorry, one last inappropriate thing From coming down the mountain He's fucking pretending to ski That's right, he's behind the sleigh

And it's supposed to be like water skiing on snow And he goes Well, they're just skiing by the way Right, yeah But he's holding on like with a rope though And he goes The sun's bright And the powder's bitching

Like right to this little girl's Face of bitching Hey little girl Oh yes My husband Dr. Seuss Would approve of the word Bitchen The old ladies to sleep

Put in bitching Oh yes That was the good doctor's final words As he crossed over Into the next life This is bitching There's a separate cut With all this stuff out of it

Like oh welcome to the Is Jim Carrey going to be here. Oh no, that's Jim Carrey right there. It's like some janitor. It's like when Barney was posing as Krusty the clown. No, no, Mrs. Guys, Mrs. Guys, here, have some more turkey or roast

beast, I guess. More wine, Mrs. Guys? Oh, some of that delicious gravy. Poor woman. Whatever. At this point, Christine Bransky breaks up with Jeffrey Tambor. She said, I want a real man. And she was like,

making out with the Grinch and everyone throws up. So gross. And both of their weird fucking inverse mouths are pressing up against each other. It's horrifying. It is horrifying to watch this. It's like two buttholes. It's like ass to ass, dude.

Grinch to who? The whole fucking town starts throwing dollar bills. And then like the Grinch, even though he's learned a lot, still hates Jeffrey Tambor's guts because he's alive in the year 2018. But no, he still hates Jeffrey Tambor's guts. And he's, like, laughing at him.

Like, you lose, I win, like, kind of a thing. It's pretty great. And then they break into, like, a cult song, though. Yeah. Because they're just like, it's like the Christmas anthem or whatever. Then Christopher Lee, who comes out, is wearing pigtails and he's, like, dancing with a Skype. It's like, what the fuck's about to happen? This gigantic fucking wicker, cringe-shaped statue.

That's how it goes. Oh, man. Yeah, fucking who shaped effigy. That would be awesome, actually. Well, I assume one of the things they cut is that there would have to be. a cut to two who years later and it's fucking a Grinch baby. I really thought that they were going that way. I thought that he was going to impregnate her.

I thought in discussing how the Grinch stole Christmas of the line, I really thought he was going to impregnate her. I did. I really, I thought they were going to have like two kids. One was going to look like her. Exactly. And you're totally right, Steve, because like at this point, all bets are off. Yeah, all bets are off. Jeffrey Tambor ate a dog's asshole in this movie.

I didn't make that up. So then it's a weird, he's like, oh, yeah, you're hosting Christmas in my bat cave. Come on in, everybody. And it's like, just end it. Just fucking end it with singing about Christmas. Where are you Christmas comes back at this point? So you hated Christmas for all this time.

And then you picked the most annoying fucking thing about the holidays, the travel up to this fucking mountain that smells like shit. And you're just going to cook in it. He didn't have time to clean, dude. And yet there was not a sanitary place to be. put down any of this roast beast. Fucking rock pan or whatever the hell he's got up there. He's not a Flintstone.

I don't know. Mabba-dabba Grinch. Yabba, who? Oh, yeah. Is that all right, Chris? It's fine. It's like a solid six. The Flintstone's probably had a Christmas episode despite Christ not existing.

They did. I've seen it a ton of times. Yeah, it's... Do they talk about the Lord? No, they don't. It's another like Santa's around. So it's like... What the fuck? It's that. But yeah, it's, Fred gets a job wrapping presents at a mall to make some, like, extra holiday scratch. Yeah. And then, like, he becomes, like, a mall Santa. And then, like, I would say safely, like, 82% of Christmas specials, Santa is sidelined for some reason. Oh, no. And so Fred Flintstone becomes Santa Claus for that. Oh, he's got to get used to that. Because I think Santa Claus comes first. Christmas is around forever. Then actual Jesus Christ shows up and, like, steals the thunder away from Santa. Oh, because he was born around.

on the same time. Yeah. It's just like suddenly becomes his holiday now. Okay. I guess we're sharing. Oh, really. I'll really break your brain. There's like a Santa in one of those dinosaurs' Christmas specials. Oh, yeah. You're right. Dinosaur is like the Earl Sinclair. Yes. Thank you. Yeah. The big like Muppet show. Yeah. Yeah. That was something, huh? That show. I've seen a lot of that show. Yeah. It was on like

right before Urkel. You should have just had the Henson workshop do this whole fucking thing. It would have been terrifying. Yeah. It would have been Should have got Gialmo del Toro. Oh my God. Fucking Dunk Jones is the Grinch. He's got eyeballs on his big slender fingers. Yes.

Actually, yeah, that's when it's appropriate to make an adult Grinch movie. And Christine Branski just goes out. I'm doing the shape of water of the hand. It would be wonderful if this was video. Christine Baranski is just like eating hard-boiled

eggs with the Grinch. The Grinch is confined to a tub of water, by the way. And Octavia Spencer is just there. Right. Just get it. Here's something that I was shocked did not happen at the end of this movie. Sure. Because like credits hit.

Where are you Christmas kicks back in? Faith Hill singing this song. Woof. How did they resist? It's impressive on their part. Honestly, how did they resist the temptation to not have a fucking bloopers reel on this thing? Oh, yeah. With more Jim Carrey vamping.

You know there were hours of footage. Clint Howard's probably slap it as a little. knees. I somehow think it's not quite as good when it's not him. And liar, liar, it's all that the credits are all bloopers. Yes. Because it's Jim Carrey doing it. Or him like making other people break, which is always, I'm a sucker for that. But they just don't have it. It's just straight credits. There's nothing.

Well, they've done enough to us. I feel like. They've run out of everything. It's been an hour and 45 minutes of a 30, of like 20 minutes of content. I've watched Jeffrey Tambor eat out a dog's asshole. I mean, that's the only good thing it gave me. Right after the fudge dump, dude. Oh, Christ. Would anybody recommend this? No, this is an obnoxious film. It gave me a headache. It's just, it's bright. It's loud. The CG is terrible. The slow motion is terrible. In the beginning of the movie, when he smiles, it's slow mo. It's like you're watching in true motion for a second. The framework gets fucked up. And that's kind of all over this movie.

It's wretched. It's rotten. Props to Jim Carrey for even making this even something near a movie, but no, thank you. Original's 25 minutes. There you go. Don't watch this. Watch that. And Bruce fucking Karloff, man. Oh, that's right. Of course. Chris Cabin's definitely right. Yeah, the original is short, and it's fun.

It's good. It's a classic. This is, this is one of the worst things. I know he said that with Van Helsing. I was like, this is one of the worst things I ever sat through for the show. You say it every three months. Yes, but Van Helsing is worse than this. Yeah, I agree with that. and I just did not have any fun watching. It's not even

fun watching Jim Carrey do Jim Carrey because so much of it feels like previously on Jim Carrey. I remember the Ace Ventura thing by the way. It's when he has the big freak out at the end and he comes back rather and he's like surrendering and they're going to like, Tambores like arrest

this man. He does the arms out head down. All righty then. Shall we go to jail? He does the same fucking thing. And I was like, dude, you're aping the second Ace Ventura? Come on. There's a lot of that. It's kind of like an evening with Jim

Carrie and he's kind of playing the hits a little bit. Yes, absolutely. And I, you know, I just needed to check my Jim Carrey bingo. The Grinch needed to go to a bathroom and beat himself up. I would not recommend this. The 20 minute thing is awesome. Yeah. And I got to say

I'm a little bit of a cumber bitch. Like, I'm going to see this in some I might not see it in theaters. Okay. But I know I will be tempted by the warm glowy, glowy warmness of HBO. I'm curious, because he's doing a voice. He's not just doing Cumberbatch. Like, it's a little higher, it seems. It's like, nasally.

Yeah, I haven't seen a preview for the movie, but I saw a preview. They were doing... Did you guys ever see this in the theaters? It was, like, over the summer. I don't know if it was chain specific, but it was at, like, AMCs for sure. It's definitely an AMC. It might have been a regal, too. It was like, it was kind of like when the Gremlin's getting the projection booth.

The Gremlin's too. It was like, oh, I'm the Grinch, and I'm going to present another trailer to you. Yeah, I did not see this. I usually go to Regal. And it was weird because it would just be, it wasn't a preview for that movie. It was like the Grinch is pulling out the like rated for all audiences

green card sign. And then it would also just like the trailer would end and he'd be like, wasn't that great a trailer for a movie? And then it would be like the Grinch coming to the theaters. This Chris was like, what the fuck are you doing? Literally a trailer to introduce your trail. Yeah. It was so weird. I was like, get out of here. Get these

gremlins out of the projection booth. Just with Venom. with the fucking trailer at the end of your movie all these fucking thing, dude. They've got to stop. Dare you, Sony. That's abhorrent.

That pissed me off so much. I was pissed off by this, man. I was pissed off by this. It's weird because they're released out of order. In release world, this is airing after Cat in the Hat.

Sure. I don't know how, we haven't recorded Cat in the Hat yet as we record this. I don't know if my soul will feel like it was being ripped out of my body watching that movie. I feel like it's got to be worse.

I feel like I'm going to make a guess. Cat in the hat is worse because it's Mike Myers. Yeah, I'm going to go with Steve on that. Are we taking bets over here, fellas? Boy, what are we betting? Are we been a dog's asshole over here? I haven't seen another version of Cat in the Hat other than the book.

There's at least a sense of newness there. Yeah, sure. Where this, I'm just like, I watched the 25 thing, the 20 minute one original. I'm like, you didn't go down to Broadway when Rosie O'Donnell was in Susicol? I somehow missed it. I've never seen Cat in the Hat before.

I understand it's way shorter than this, I think. Yeah, that's... So that might give it the edge. That might give it the edge. But we'll see. I don't know. I honestly don't know. This was...

Last night was the first man I ever watched this movie. Yeah. I've never seen Cat in the Hat. So I'm just unprepared, man. Dude, it's going to be an adventure for all of us. Let's just put it that way. That is The Gringe from the Year 2000, directed by Ron Howard.

Thank you so much for continuing to subscribe to our Patreon. Until next time, I'm Andrew Jupin. Steven said that. Chris Cabin. Eric Siskin. Take it easy. We all go a little mad sometimes. You know, Saloene, I guess everyone's a title of one good scare. Sometimes, that is better. Zombies have entered the building. They're at the door. They're coming in.

It is time to come. Keep your appointment with the Wicca Man. They're coming to get you, Barbara. He's sick for the fucks using one too many movies. Now, Sid, don't you blame the movies? Movies don't create psychos. Movies make psychos. For a creative!

Put the fucking lotion in the bag! It was an excellent day for an exorcism.