We Hate Movies - S5 Ep209: Son of the Mask

Episode Date: June 23, 2015

On this week's episode, the gang hangs out at the bottom of the barrel with Son of the Mask! Did literally every comic actor in Hollywood turn this down? Which accent is Kal Penn going with? And why are we dragging in all this pointless Norse mythology? PLUS: Chris reveals a discovery so shocking, the rest of the gang is left speechless! Son of the Mask stars Jamie Kennedy, Alan Cumming, Traylor Howard, Steven Wright, Kal Penn, Bob Hoskins, and America's headache, Ben Stein; directed by Lawrence Guterman. Unlock Exclusive Content!: http://www.patreon.com/wehatemovies

Hello, I'm Andrew Jupin. Chris Gavin. Eric Siska. Steven Seda. And we hate movies. Hello, everyone. Welcome to We Hate Movies on the Side Show Network. Thank you for tuning in, as always. This is a continuing week of the summer blockbuster extravaganza. A little bit of an odd choice here. It's 2005's Son of the Mask, directed by someone named Lawrence Guterman. Director of Cats and Dogs, actually. Oh, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right. Makes total sense. More CGI animals in that film as well. He's got a skill.

That skill sets, the yammering dogs. He brings that CGI dog skill set to CGI baby. There you go. Oh, man. You got to have ambitions. That's the thing with this stuff. We got to see how fucking far down the uncanny valley we did. Let's fucking dig into the valley.

Open up the valley. Exactly right. You are developing property in this valley. So if anyone does not recall, because guaranteed you haven't seen it. Nobody saw this movie. Unless you, I mean, really hate yourself. I'm curious though. Here's the thing. Yeah. This movie came in 2005 or 2015 now. 11 years after that original Jim Carrey movie. We have some people listening to the show that are younger in the 17 to 19 block. I'm hoping not younger because we say fuck a lot.

We got an email from some like 14 year old boy a couple months ago. So, you know. Did you grow up with this movie? Question. Like, you know, growing up with son of the mass. Yeah, like you get like a weird. Something's just come. I, I, grew up with major pain. It makes no sense in that movie's fucking terrible. Something just comes into your sphere and you're just watching a bunch because you're an idiot. Well, you know what? I've got to say, if you grew up watching

Son of the Mask, please go in for a psychiatric evaluation. I think this movie's going to be responsible for a whole army of Dombers. Yeah, get the work up twice. Do the whole thing. I don't understand how this is a family film. That's the problem. Oh, no. It absolutely is not.

It's not an adult film either. It's a classic nobody wins scenario. It's for no one. This movie was made with no one in mind. And you can't even say like this movie was made with dollar signs in their eyes. Because look at this cast. This is also a movie that they've been trying to get made ever since the original mask hit the theater. Right.

Which is a long time ago. 11 years in the making the sequel. And this is what they come up with? I mean, George Miller was working on Fury Road for longer. 30 years. And it's amazing. You had so much time to think about how the son of the mask happens

And this is it Well this is a thing where It's a hot potato situation Because I think Oh yeah for sure At a certain point They thought it was going to be Jim Carrey And then he said no

And then they asked everybody else How much money was it though Like it had to be so much money They asked him to fucking take I don't know I mean that's the interesting thing That this movie falls under Is there is like a stable of film

that are sequels to Jim Carrey movies that he has nothing to do with which is how we're making money right like he doesn't want to do with third Ace Ventura movies so you have a little fat kid play his son son of Ace Ventura Ace Ventura Pet Detective Jr.

Remember son of the majestic? Son of Andy Kaufman dumb and dumberer when Harry met Lloyd he's not in that. The boy in the moon, not the man in the oh the prequel. Lil Truman show. It's a bit of a letdown as well. Number 22.

That's a fucking terrible movie. That is horrible. Looking at you, Joel Schumacher. And then they did number 21. Oh, wait, was it the number 23? Did you argue with that joke? That was literally the joke. I didn't remember the name of the movie. So, this movie is, Jamie Kennedy, is a would-be animator. whose wife Trailer Howard Yes, from dirty work

And two guys, a girl in a pizza place She's the pizza place in two girls She's on Monk a bunch Which I'm sure that's paying for some summer home Monk a bunch indeed There were a lot of people that were just on Monk a bunch Oh man, Ted Levine doesn't have to work for the rest of his life Because of Monk

And never have so many people fallen into the realm of not having to work for producing such poison as the TV show Monk Monk everybody But it's for a certain audience But thankfully it's people that I kind of want to You know not have to work

Ted Levine Tony Shaloolew Tony Shaloo. I mean these are all people I'm happy they don't have to fucking struggle Just keep USA original programming Out of my living room Just keep them off,

Gray's Anatomy, I'm fine. Is Ted Levine on Gray's Anatomy? No, but that's my point is I think he would be doing a Graze Anatomy arc, if not for something like Monk. Hey, bro, are you watching Graze? Yo, bro. You believe he's dead? Do you believe, uh, I'm not doing a character. I'm actually asking

if you're watching. Oh, all right. No, I watched that fucker get T-bone though on the internet. That was great. That's what I was wondering. Is that, uh, Mick Drimald? McDreamy. Our good friend Patrick. Love your boy. himself. So Jamie Kennedy's

would-be animator, his wife wants to get pregnant with a kid, he does it because he's a jerk, and he might be fucking this dog. We'll get there. The dog finds the mask. Alan Cumming plays Loki. Whatever. It's a stupid movie.

You're about to hear the whole fucking thing, so congratulations. I mean, there's so many places to start with this. I think we start with what is it, Ben Stein narrating the history of the mask. Dude, sure. This movie has no respect for the audience because it's like, do you know what Loki and Odin are? Yes, we do. Because we know what anyone has a base idea of Norse mythology. That you're talking about the masks. They know. Yeah. But what about the sons of the masks? That's the thing. That don't know Norse mythology yet. If you're trying to market this to kids and you have to try to in some way set up like who these gods are going to be.

Sure. Yeah, I get I get it. Drag in America's. fucking rash, Ben Stein. This is a guy. Ben Stein? Yeah. Who agreed to do anything mask related. The one guy, he was in the first movie, he was in the cartoon and he was in

the son of the mask. I think that was in his, I think the first contract stipulated that. Whatever we do with this franchise, Ben, you're in. But so this is, this opening scene where he's like, this is the history of Norse mythology. This is what this mask is. And what the fuck museum.

is this? It's like, it's a museum with a bunch of replicas and what, it's not, it's chiseled into it. It's the American Institute of Bullshit. Oh, okay. Like, I guess it's a folklore museum which do exist, but that's not what these people. Why is there such a varied tour? There's like

ill billy's, like, oh man, I can't wait, go to museum. Let's talk about that because Benstein brings up that, you know, what Loki's parameters are, you know, that Loki can change shapes. Wow. And he's even easy. Clear eyes. That's great when you've got to go to work in the morning, if you know what I mean.

Yeah, totally. And he mentions that Loki has even been known to change shapes into a woman. Yep. Prompting one guy in this tour group to go, A woman, man alive, lock up your sons and daughters around that twisted fruit cake. Twisted fruit cake. Whopty fuck screenplay. Exactly, because Ben Stein's like, whatever, you know.

Because, like, we're supposed to think that that guy's a jerk, but you're still trying to get that joke. You know what I mean? You're still clearly making a joke there. So, right away, this, this, woof, yikes, fruitcake. In the year 2000 and fucking five, everybody. Yeah, I mean, fruitcake was out. It was out. It was way out of the parameter.

But so you're advertising this movie for kids. You've got this idiot explaining Norse mythology. But then, in one of the most terror-inducing things, I've. seen in a long time. Alan Cumming, playing Loki. Dressed as Magneto. Right. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Can't forget that. He's got these donning the Magneto hat and long jacket.

We have a future Charles, not them. And he's just like, you know, like, stop making fun of my dad. And he like cuts, he uses his magic powers to cut off Ben Stein's face because he's like, that mask is a fake and cuts Benstein's face off and sticks it in the mask case. And then, like, Insidious 3, which I just saw, you've got this person running around without a face on. And he's just like, oh, no, I have vertigo, Ben Stein. Yeah, it's like, get me out of this case. What did you do to my face?

What's happening? He's so calm about someone ripping his face off his body. Cut to 15 minutes later when the cops are like, oh my God. Call in Mulder. You have to imagine once Loki leaves the vicinity. of this museum. The magic wears off and it's just a man with a ripped off face. Yep. And the body

falls down dead and there's blood everywhere. There is a closed casket. Oh, yeah, absolutely. That's right after this scene, closed casket. And that hillbilly is just standing at the crime scene like, look of that faceless fruit cake. It would be great if rather than... I love going to museums just to rag

out of. Like, what is this guy's deal? It would be kind of great if instead of turning into the worst a kiss army member with radioactive poisoning which is what he looks like

as the mask but instead of that he pulls a Hannibal Lecter puts Benstein's face on his face Oh yeah He starts walking around Yeah I think that

Yeah What a twisted fruit kiss Hey honey you want to go To the tractor show today No I want to go to the museum They got a bunch of stuff about Greek people Hey why they were up to right

Hey why is that pain with store I don't got Hulk in it please sir you've been banned from this museum a bunch of times fuck that y'all I bought a season past making fun of all these fruitcakes

in this here museum got me a membership oh man African architecture that's pretty fruitcake to me don't touch African art so boy oh boy do I love

supporting not-for-profit organizations fruit cakes as far as the I can see The African wing of this museum is looking out of the White House. So, by the way, at this point, Loki has formed into, like, God, Loki to do all these powers. Yeah. Which he has all these mask powers without putting the mask on. Right.

Because he's a God, I get it. He's Loki. But more scones. And for what? Loki did. Why? I don't know. For hygiene.

No, I think the idea was, like, well, Loki's a trickster and he put this mask on earth to cause some fucking mission. Oh. And he jacks off to it somewhere. I think the difference is because I think in the original they say that Loki was banished into the mask. Oh, do they? And for some reason, in this one,

he just has, like, his essence or something. Is this supposed to take place 11 years after that first movie? Well, yeah, because he throws it in the river and the water brings it to his shore. It's supposed to, yeah. What's crazy about this movie is

it cares about geography. Okay, the first movie started an edge city this movie the mask floats down the river from edge city to fringe city and within fringe city is where Jamie Kennedy's shitty family lives

I don't understand these are it's a comic book property originally so I guess they're adhering to that but I don't know image comics dark horse dark horse and this is what I don't get about the whole franchise the mass comic books he's the Joker yeah he's like a bad like he kills

millions of he's a like I Oh, he's killing people? Yeah, he's an assassin who got the mask and turned into a deranged serial killer. Oh, he's dead pool. Why aren't we having that movie? Because it's a fucking Disney proper. Well, no, a new line family, Jim Carrey movie. The first movie was a little darker on the edges, right?

Yes. You're dealing with the mafia. You got Peter Green. That's any time Peter Green shows up in a movie, he darkens it up a bit. Yeah, but it's like a degrade darkening it up, though. I mean, that guy as the main villain. of the mask. That was always one of my big problems with that movie. I think that movie's a

fucking snooze. There's not a lot there. You know, it's a little bit of nostalgia going on. Jim Carrey, the physicality that he's putting, pulling off in that movie is amazing. I'm not denying that. Well, that's what I would say is the difference between that movie and this movie is that that movie they set it up. Jim Carrey is a schlub

in the beginning. And then the mask lets out Jim Carrey as the crazy physical comedy genius. You know why? Because he's putting on the mask in that movie. Jamie Kennedy, two scenes with this mask. And he can't pull it off. No, he can't. That's very clear. And that voice he's got,

it's bad ADR of him trying to do this like swab Hey, how you doing? It's fucking horrendous. So we cut to James, you know, Alan Cumming ruined Ben Stein's life, ends his life.

Wow. I'm dead. I've been turned into a nightmare. Don't get me start. about creation. Make Jimmy Kimmel do my eulogy. Guaranteed Jimmy Kimmel does not speak to him anymore. No, I don't think so. We cut to Fringe City.

Yes, his dog, Jimmy Kennedy's dog who looks a lot like Jim Carrey's dog. It's the same name. No, it's not. The first dog was Milo. This one's Otis. Oh, suicide. Oh, God. Fuck you, movie.

But the fact that we're doing another mask movie and you need to get a get the exact same dog. How about another type of dog have a little fun? What about a pug? Oh, a pug would have been good. A pug of the city. Well, you know what, though?

Then that's a little too, M.I.B. Sure. No, go full Beethoven. I'm sorry. Oh, man. Can you imagine? An actual, like, big beast that you actually have to deal with.

Oh, a St. Bernard get the mask, dude. That's how Kujo happened. You put that thing gets the mask on it. It looks like one of those Ghostbuster dogs. The Hulk dogs, you mean? Yeah. Those are the Hulk dogs. The Hulk dogs from Angley's the Hulk?

Sure, yeah. Remember that when a poodle gets beta waves or whatever, gamma waves? Remember that when Angley directed the Hulk? Remember also that footage of Angley, like, emotionally portraying the Hulk? Oh, yeah, he mocapped himself, man. He sure did. Oh, God damn it, Hulk. Oh, God damn it.

Look, he's destroying San Francisco. I'm just going to bite into a power line right now. God damn it. That's my favorite Nick Nolte movie in any movie. Any movie. That move, he just chomps down into that thing. Oh, God damn it. And it's like, it's a cable as thick that they, like, run on the floor of the ocean.

No, I'm fucking starving. I'm going to take a big hug out of that cable. Well, I'll be honest with you. I've bitten power lines several times in my life. And I've never known that. Nobody's ever tried to electrocute me. Yeah, I think that's a little bit of a misnomer about biting into power lines. Where's Eddie?

This is another 48 hours five, right? we cut to Jamie Kennedy and trailer Howard we find out very quickly that she really wants a baby and is in the wrong relationship yeah like just literally break up

it should be called divorce of the mask Jamie Kennedy is having baby nightmares about her her nether regions is vomiting out her birthing 19 and counting

literally popping out kids at a dugar as great is what we're talking and they have fangs and stuff yeah why are they little vampires this is the start of way too many instances of the fish eye lens in this movie oh man

they got their money's worth for that lens rental you when you when you bought it in 1996 you thought that was going to be big you might as well dust it off you know it'll pay for itself just five music videos and it'll be fine I was going to say this movie looks like a bad smash mouth video well no I mean

Buster Rimes used all the fish eye lenses you needed. Let me just say, I know we just made fun of Smash Mouth and Buster Rhymes, and I know a lot of listeners hold them to be high steam. Sure. And it's okay if you want to listen to that, all right? It's fine if you love Busta Bust. It's great to love Bust

to Bust a Bust, it's not great to listen to Smash Mouth. Yeah, get out of my fucking face. Guys, I once saw Buster Rhymes live. What, under what circumstance? The best circumstance, and this is so... Did you go to a Rock the Bells Festival? I went to a festival. I went to a festival

of sorts. Okay. This was 2002. Wow. Okay. Okay. Here's your, here's the headliner. Yep. David Bowie. Okay. I'm going for fucking David Bowie. Sure. Right. Under him was Moby. Okay. And then further, further down the live. A couple acts below that. Terry tickets was Buster Rives. But Buster Rhymes did his set, you know, did his thing. Sure. He decided to, you know, like, how are you going to end your set? Make it the most memorable, magical evening, a night someone could have. Plug the role you have in Halloween Resurrection.

He might have done that. I don't know. But he also went on this tirade about downloading music. Oh, no. And man, boy, did that make me... Not care for him? Yeah. Did you purposely go home and pirate every Buster Rhymes album? See, I wanted to, but I realized I would never want to listen to me.

I was wondering if he actually made a rap around not downloading music. Because that would be really late. No, no, no. He just stopped the fucking show dead. And just had a frank conversation with 3,000 people in this stadium. Wow. That's something.

Did he invite Lars Alrick up? Yeah, really. I wish. Oh, man. So, this house they live in, by the way, looks like the house from a Gushers commercial. It does. It's a cartoon house. Everything looks like the fucking Gushers commercial

and the Slim Jim ads. Yeah. Oh, son of the man. No, the one with the guy with the plastic hair. Oh, yeah. I'm like this guy. Yes. That reminds me.

And I want to bring it up now because I know I'm going to forget later. But Steve, you just made me think, I don't know if anyone will remember this. So for in this room or around the world listening, there was a stand-up-ish guy that his act was he was made up to look like a Ken doll. Does anyone remember this? That was me. no there was like i remember seeing it on like late night tv one time was it the band aqua no it wasn't it was pre-aqua pre that music video and it was i mean it was the early 90s and it was a guy he had plastic hair like a kendall he had very like stiff like facial expression max headroom no it wasn't

maxed room either it was a thing it may as well have been like my memory clouds it up to like mix it up with the possible, like, late-night, like, QVC type thing? I think you just got haunted or something. I may have, dude. I mean, I don't know. But it's this memory I've had of this, this Kendall-looking motherfucker doing what I remembered to be stand-up comedy. I mean, it's that time you took peyote in the Mattel headquarters.

Right, right, right, right, right. That's why they call it a dream house. Anyway. So, we, they meet some friends of theirs that have a whole bunch of rotten children. And on the way back, she's driving. and he's playing fucking Game Boy Advance. And you know what? That's Divorce Town.

You've got to be a good fucking co-pilot. If somebody else is driving, be engaged, help out with the radio, just playing your little Game Boy at a 30-something-year-old man. Game Boy, falling asleep? Yep. While someone's driving you, any of that? Oh, oh, steams my clams. But he's playing this Game Boy, and she's like, I think,

you need to know it's very important to me to have a child and he's like uh-huh the other thing about Wario is and I'm just like I fucking hate your guts from seeing one of you in this movie he's presented as you know like a man child a baby man of a complete baby man he's immature

and you'd think God you'd think there would be a character journey of some kind that he'd learn to be a better man through the use of the mask but that doesn't happen or you think he might be excited about fucking his wife.

Maybe just maybe he'd be excited that, like, okay, yeah, we're trying for a kid. But maybe the beginning part of that would excite you over goddamn Wario Adventure. Well, you know what? He's getting all a Wario's gold coins short up on his little Game Boy Advance record. But it's so strange because, like, Jim Carrey was a lovable loser. You know what I mean? Stan Ipkiss is a lovable loser in that movie. There's nothing.

And it's Jamie Kennedy's, I mean... It's Jamie Kennedy, period. That's a problem to begin with. He's not a lead. I've never liked a movie that he's ever been in more than 20 minutes. I mean, I think this is the first movie I've seen that you would, like, qualify in that, like, handful of Jamie Kennedy movies. It's a vehicle. It's a Jamie Kennedy vehicle.

Because I didn't see Malibu's Most Wanted. Nope. Is there anything else? I think handful was an exaggeration. I think he had some direct-to-video, whatever. Nonsense FAPU. Didn't he also do the... I'm sorry, Eric just said, National Lampoon presents Fart Fest,

which is a movie I would watch, by the way. And I'm sure Jamie Kennedy would take that offer. Dorm Days 2, colon, fart fest. Can I put this out there? If anyone at National Lampoon or Jamie Kennedy himself is listening, let's get together on this. I think we've stopped branding movies National Lampoons. They're still putting movies out,

but we've learned that no one at the directed DVD store or whatever, or really gives a flying fuck that's the thing is like a kid today trying to rent something doesn't know what the fuck that means

yeah exactly well that's we did the same thing with American Pie until like young teens forgot what that meant they forgot about

those original movies thankfully I'm looking up on the internet ticker just to see what we're doing here because I just

I really want to be sure didn't he do the heckler documentary oh the heck oh yeah so Steve you saw that movie did you see that movie

I did not Oh, it's a direct response to this film. It's a documentary that starts off about actual hecklers, comedy club hecklers, and the psychology they're in and how much they fuck up comedians. It's almost like the aristocrats. Like Lewis Black shows up and like, they're telling hellcloth stories. And like, it's almost okay. That sounds like something I'd like, but I know the turn.

In the middle of it, it turns into movie critics. And it makes this comparison that movie critics are the same thing as hecklers. They are not the same thing. Because you're not. The movie critic is not stopping a movie. Exactly. He's talking about it after the fact. And it talks about, like, how hurtful they are to comedians and how hurtful, you know,

they're just, people are just trying to make money and blah, blah, blah. And these people are, like, ruining their careers. And, like, he confronts some people, too. I do remember. I watched the clip of him confronting the guy. Oh, man. That guy's a fucking straw man and a fucking phony. It's ridiculous.

Why do you say that? Because he's just, like, he, I mean, he's probably a real guy. But, like, he found, he found. Probably a real guy. He found the weakest-willed person that ever to, like, do battle with. Because this guy's, like, gets really intimidated by Jamie Kennedy for some reason. And, like, Jamie Kennedy's like, why'd you say my performance was worse than Hitler? Hitler killed a lot of people.

I just made some jokes. And the guys, like, I don't know. I thought it was funny at the time. Oh, man. I mean, that's just a bad critic calling fucking somebody Hitler from being a son of the mask. Well, is it a critic or is it some fat guy on a message board? Let's be honest here. Hitler overcame a lot more than Jamie Kennedy.

Oh, yeah. Another one, I'm looking, I mean, he's, he appears in a ton of things. A lot of those contemporary spoof movies, for example. But another one that is clearly him, 2007's kicking it old school. Yeah, that's another one. Which I think, yeah, it's like son of the mass kicking it old school. Malibu's Most Wanted. Oh, man.

Criterion can do a trilogy set. Yep, pretty much. So, yes, we, you know, he kind of leaves it with his wife, like, look, I'm not ready for a kid yet. And she's like, yeah, but that's kind of a problem for me. Talk to you later. I'm going to go play in my incredibly weird dog room. He's got a dog room. It's really crazy. I love dogs. I have a cat now and I'm a fucking loser about it. You can follow my, you are. You follow my Instagram post. You get it. That guy's a loser about his cat. I don't have a fucking room where I go in and I go away from my girlfriend and be like goodbye, I've got to go play with my cat. Yeah, I'm going to close this door and me and the cat are going to have a good time. Wait, honey, what are you doing with our... It's my dog. Yeah,

yeah, exactly. Yeah, it's oh yeah, big time. You get the feeling that he had the dog before they got married. Oh, absolutely. You know, before he met her kind of a thing. Meanwhile, she's just like, I am going to do some crazy shit

to you tonight. Yeah. And he's like, uh-huh, Game Boy Advance with my dog. And she's like, you don't understand. I am going to rock your world. Our marriage. On the very basis of our relationship will be changed forever. Wait. Are you actually going to? Are you actually going to wear the Princess Peach costume? Are you going to do it finally? Or the dog suit for fuck's sake. Yeah, totally. They got a reservation at the Overlook Hotel. I imagine them just watching the scene in the

background while they're doing... Oh, man. Oh, man. A marital aid. A marital aid is what I'm saying. Some couples have to watch pornography. They watch the dog blowjob scene from The Shining. And it's an adorable little Jack Russell. Oh, it's the best, this little Otis. It's a room that he painted with dog bones all over it.

There's all sorts of activities and shit. I mean, this is... I think, unless I'm remembering it wrong, there's bunk beds in this room. Bottom bunk for the dog, top bunk for the idiot. So she's like... Clearly frustrated about this, but there's no time because we have to also learn that he's a big loser at this animation factory. What's amusement part?

I don't know what this facility is supposed to be. I think it's what the Google offices look like. I think this is Google. These are the guys that are in charge making those stupid animations every special day. It's a special day in history. We've got to change the Google logo. That started off as like, oh, it's Christmas. Like, let's do a thing.

Oh, it's 4th of July. Dude, that is a full-time job now. Every ding-dong day, it's some scientist's birthday. They definitely have a research going through. Like, what is a fucking... Is this a special day in Peru? Okay, we'll do something for us. Today, in Peruvian history, the game Tetris came out for the first time.

So we're making the... Tetris game. Yeah, we're going to make a Tetris game on Google now. And you can move the G, so it looks like an O. We have your little Peruvian flags, and you have to make a match. It's Google. I'm a billionaire. So, like, his only real defense is, look, I want to make,

and at this point, like, so he's playing in this fucking creepy-ass dog room. Yeah. He realizes the dog has this mask. He's like, that's a piece of garbage. Let's put this away for later. And she comes in and he's like, look, I just want to make cartoons. That's my dream. If I have a kid, I can't make cartoons.

And she's like, well, you're not doing that now. Smash cut to him in a fucking turtle costume in a department store. slash animation studio slash amusement park he's giving a tour to people touring an animation studio like this open air

Google-esque office but yeah he's like one of the cartoon characters that the animation studio makes and he's giving like who the fuck is touring a cartoon studio I mean people do for like cool money

I think well no security guards in Korea right they tour a lot of animation factories yeah making sure nobody gets out Yeah, the bayonets on their guns there. But I just like, I don't even know. It's because it's not like I can knock on the door of Pixar and be like, tour, please. And then someone comes out dressed up as Wally like, there's a tour, follow me.

You know, that doesn't happen. But also, the idea is even if that were true, right, that that being Wali would be some kind of a career path to becoming an animator. like everybody's got to start somewhere exactly like you aren't walking around Disney World dressed up as Prince Charming only to someday run the directed DVD studio that's like maybe some animators like teenage son

that's his first job a lot of nephews a lot of nephews and they're playing tornado turtle or whatever the fuck else tornado turtle I'm sorry we have to stop the conversation because did a beer fall on the floor no no oh all right I thought a beer fell no just my notebook oh all right

Because if it was a beer falling, the casual way, you were like, no, never mind. Let it go. Let it go. So he's touring around. We meet his pal, Cal Penn, who's like, oh, man, you know, Cal Penn, whose accent is up and down. Oh, yeah, everywhere. And I don't know if it's, it's clearly, like, Cal Penn just talks like an American dude. Yeah, he has done a lot of, he has done a lot of movies where he does, like, an over-the-top Indian. And Wilder, it's thick as fuck.

Oh, the Rise of Taj. It's something else. Yeah, we're just all big bang theorying all over that fucking movie. Yeah, and but this movie, he is flip-flopping back and forth. It's weird. It's almost like he got two different directions each scene or something, because sometimes he's just totally normal house calpan. And the other times he's like the rise of Taj. And it's like, what are we, and his name is Jorge as well?

And it's like, well, what are we trying to say with this character? His name is Jorge? His name is Jorge. It makes no fucking sense. Oh, but it is pretty funny, though, said the screenwriter. Because it makes no sense. It's funny because it makes no sense. It's one of those, it's funny because it's stupid.

This whole goddamn movie. It's just, it's insulting. It's like, that's just like, I guarantee in the screenplay, Jorge, comma, ethnic, comma. No, comma, intermittent ethnic voice. Whatever it is. And, you know, he's just like. He's in a mocap suit.

He's in a mocap suit, because all of this is happening. happening at once, apparently. Yeah. And they're all eating lunch together and like, oh, Stephen Wright, who is the head of this editor? Who's the Walt Disney of this video? Oh, man. An animation god. Yeah. Sure.

He's the Matt Gaining. Oh, he's the Matt Graining. Yeah. I mean, so he's sitting there, like, eating amongst the plebes. Yeah. And Cal Penn's like, this is your one shot to go talk to him about possibly getting a cartoon show of your on that you invented. And you're just like, uh-huh.

So Jamie Kennedy goes up. up, you know, to make this proposal and he's dressed as a turtle and he's like sweating and fucking it up. And you're thinking it's like going to be a bust cut to like, so how did it go? And it's just like, oh, well, it went pretty fine. He actually told me to come back with a better idea soon and wants to hear from me. I actually kind of like that in the character is that Stephen Wright is not like your stereotypical like bad boss. Oh, fuck you. Or it just doesn't ignore. It just ignores the guy. Well, because it's Stephen Wright, so you're not getting any kind of emotive response out of anything. It's sad that he's

sad that he's in this movie he's a great stand up he's funny brilliant brilliant comedian that's the weird thing is he chucks his persona he's just kind of in this which is unfortunate yeah you're right he doesn't have the same droopy dog delivery which is actually unfortunate because he's really funny and fucking

baked as the guy in the couch and he's just doing Stephen Wright jokes but that is where that needs to be relegated Steve to a couch not a titan of animation industry how did he get there you don't get there you don't get there with a personality like this. I want an

origin story. A rise of that guy? Side DVD release. Because this by the way, shockingly, Son of the Mask released theatrically. I don't know. It's amazing. Someone just set a boat of money on fire. It was called the SS

Son of the Mask. Just to watch it burn. That's a Viking funeral for money. I think this movie was produced by the Joker. It might have been produced by Loki to create mischief on the world. Because I don't... You think you know what the story is.

Like, all right, so it's about having a kid. It's about rising in this animation studio. Maybe he puts on the mask and something happened. Because that's right. In the original mask, Jim Carrey uses the persona of the mask to, like, further his career. Jim Carrey, right? Because he's like a reporter or something. He works at a banker.

Oh, yes, that's right. But he gets in bed with a reporter. Yes. Right. And it's like the girl from wings. Oh, yeah. Oh, a little. A little.

early 90s, Amy Yazbeck in that movie ain't too bad. You got your first screen appearance of Cameron Diaz, if anybody could possibly care. It was her best moment probably. I would say, yeah. No, fuck at a car. That's the one. Oh, yeah. Oh, man. I still have not

seen the counselor. Is that the best part of her career? If you do the counselor watch, I've still not seen the counselor. I haven't seen it either. You're not missing much, except for fucking the car. I think you're missing quite a lot. I'll tell you what, if you want a contemporary Cameron Diaz low point, And I even will say that I kind of like this movie.

Her in the Jamie Fox Annie. Holy train wreck, that character. Well, I think that she's good, actually. I think that she's got range. She's got range. She could do comedy really well, I think. Oh, she's a, I think she's a smart actress. She just takes garbage.

Yeah, I think she's very risky. Yeah, she does risky stuff, but like most of it is garbage. Yes, but bad risks. Does that car impregnate her in that? movie? Yes. Is that how Optimus Fy? Actually, it's also known as Crash 2. Talk about Herbie fully loaded.

God. Whatever. That's good. So back to Son of the Mazz. He goes home and there's a Halloween party and it's the big deal of the animation studio. By the way, he's got a rival which means nothing

in this movie. It's not a character. This guy, Alan, or whomever. He was Chad? Yeah. Even worse than Allen. I was like, oh man, Chad's going to rise up to the company faster than me. Chad. And the guy's like, hi.

And that's the end of it. He's not in the movie anymore at all. Why not just, I mean, I know you've burned, you're Jamie Kennedy. I'm sure you've burned all the bridges. But like, ask Matthew Liller to come in for five fucking minutes and play this Chad character. So I remember that it's a thing. When the Dax Shepherd was a little too big for that, actually. 05.

Yeah, he was kind of taken. Actually, I think if you, they can't get too close, Dax Shepard and Jamie Kennedy. Oh, yeah, they might time cop them. Yeah, same matter. They're going to come into one big one. Oh, you're totally right. And then Frank Welker starts voicing him.

Man, I'd kill myself. That is. I mean, I don't know about the whole burning bridges thing because at the end of the day, Jamie Kennedy seems like a really nice guy. Sure. That just does the worst things you've ever Malibu's most wanted. Like, you know.

But that heckler thing makes me wonder if he's, Oh, that's a recommend for me. You got to watch. Is it currently streaming on Netflix? I think it might be. Okay. So goes home, his wife does not. I want to go to this Halloween party because, A, they're in a huge fight because she wants to get pregnant and he doesn't. Yes.

And he's like, yeah, but my boss is Halloween party. And she's like, yeah, but go fuck your dog. She also, it's one of those like, I've got a lot of big reports to file because she's a big something, something at a nothing, nothing. Yes, we have no idea what her business is. It's she will just be required to take a week-long trip to New York in a few minutes later in the movie, so... Well, I mean, that's kind of the weird underlying thing is the emasculated, like him trying to get his manhood back. Well, because she's a bitch wife, right? Like, she's a wet blanket wife. Like, the whole movie is trying to circumvent her and her fucking designs.

But I don't think it acknowledges her that much to do that. Do anything. Yeah, that's true. She just comes in, and I think she's a very logical character. I don't think she's villainized. She's too ignored to be villainous. So it's like, hey man, you know, we got married. Like, clearly we've talked about this. At least at the time when we got married, you said you wanted to have a kid. Yeah.

I want to have a kid now. Like, let's talk. Oh, I'm sorry, Wario's fucking Golden Palace, whatever, you know. But she is very much just like, I'm not going to this Halloween party because I have like work to do. You go, you have a good time. And when you come back, by the way, nothing will be the same again. Because the intercourse that we're going to have after this holiday. Halloween party. We're going to make

a baby. Oh, you know, actually, I just bought Otis a nice, a cool little, one of those balls you could put a little treat inside. I'd love to watch him try and get that. I actually just printed out a picture of Otis to put on my face for later so that you're all... Oh, man.

You're ready to go. And one for your face too. So he doesn't have a costume because of some reason or another. I think the dog ate it, literally. Sure. There was a thing like oh you could maybe you can go as a turtle yeah oh and then he would do that every day it's sad so but but he's got this mask though and she's like honey why don't you just put this mask on

and get the fuck out of here and go to this party already lame he's like oh everybody every here's the thing is everybody always goes all out yep for their Halloween car I mean this is like Roseanne yeah like every season of Roseanne they went all out for the Halloween episode like that's what this is it's a company going all out for Halloween I would My old job, they did that. A big Halloween party? Dude, the floors of it and floors of beer and floors of people fucking dress it up. Are they hiring?

I have since left the company. Just for the Halloween party. It sounds fucking good, man. But apparently two guys got to a fist fight last year. Oh, yeah! That's what you want. Yeah. Oh, that's what you want.

Oh, man, was Pete Campbell beat? Wait. Yeah, I need to know what were they dressed at. Was this a Freddy versus Jameson? God, it would be great if it was. No, no, intel on those costumes? No, I don't know. I wasn't there.

But, like, yeah, some companies do this. It's a fun, like, blow off steam, you know, get everybody together. It's a fun way to bond, et cetera, et cetera. It seems like this is the thing, although there was a band for this, for Jamie Kennedy's, whatever. Yes. He gets there, he puts on the mask, he turns into the mask, and looks terrible. Oh, man. It's dog shit.

Why does he have hair? Why does he need plastic hair? How is this worse than the original, the mask, that came out 11 years ago? I mean, from when they're making this. Why would you, why would you give it hair? Like, I'm sorry, that is one of my biggest questions. Yeah, that kind of ruins it. It's bald.

He's a bald dude. He usually has a hat on. Sometimes he doesn't. Also, Jim Carrey had hair. A big fucking popadour. The guy had crazy hair at the time. And then they fuck it when he puts the mask on, he's a bald guy. And not for nothing.

Jamie Kennedy looks like he's been standing in front of a jet engine this entire movie His hair just looks like he got out of bed The entire time Yes So it's like yeah The contrast is take all that hair off Yes

You mean you're doing the mask Connect it back to the movie in some way And his mask outfit is like a Justin Timberlake kind of thing Yeah Yeah it is It's like an really open shirt And a suit And a suit and he goes in

And it's like hey everybody hey, why you're leaving the party? How about a musical number? Well, the first toxic joke we get is this security guy asks him for his ID. Right. And he pulls out an IV. Oh, mercy.

I totally forgot about that. Yeah, a whole, like, hospital setup, man. What a horse shit joke. Yeah. And again, nobody's like, wait, how did you? Are you some shitty magician? Because please leave. That's what, in both of these mask movies,

no one is ever like, how the fuck is this person turning into a, tornado. How are you bouncing off the walls? Did you immigrate from here, from Chernobyl? The question on the table is, are you an alien?

Yeah. And if so, let's call up Mulder and Scull. Yeah, and let's get them in here. Or at this point, it's probably Reyes and the other one, right? Doggett. Yeah, dog it. Well, the show was off the end at this point. Either way, someone showed up and cutting them open. But instead, and this is the case with both mask

movies. Every dude in the room is jealous and every woman is horny as fuck. That's right. Every man wants to be him. Every woman wants to be with him. Well, the funny thing is there's this woman in like a sexy outfit. Yeah. Oh yeah. And like he goes, hey baby, you're not sexy enough for me yet.

And like, grabs her and she turns into a tornado and like, I mean, she's in a skippy outfit to begin with. It's like a leather outfit. And it's just a little skimpier afterwards and everyone goes, Ah, go. But then he's like, actually. never mind not sexy enough and tosses her to Cal Penn

you're right I'm a monogamous man here you go bro I guess you own her now and that's something right this is an object that's a way to go with this movie is he turns into the mask he fuck some chick at this party and then it's like

oh okay you don't want to fuck your wife and have a kid with her you know and that causes like marital rift like that's something for the movie to do Maybe any fucking thing. Ordinary people starring the mask. Or what was that? What was that?

War the Roses? War the Roses. The War of the Maskes? Yeah. An epic divorce comedy? Yeah. Sure. Why not? You get Danny DeVito in this movie. I'm watching a lot happier. Hey, guys. Absolutely. Mask becomes her. So. Mask versus Mask.

We get this musical number where we are singing Frankie Valley in the Four Seasons. in like four different musical styles. We're rapping it. Because this is, you know, Jim Carrey can do physical stuff, could do a lot of voices, could do a lot of characters. Yep. Jamie Kennedy kind of can't. What he's sort of kind of well known for

is his musical parody ability. Or Steve, conversely, this ain't your mama's mask. Absolutely right. And that, from this Halloween party, we're making the distinction of like, this guy will not be tornadoing around fucking with gangsters, he is here

to get the party started. This whole scene is like, remember how fun that scene of Cuban Pete was? Yeah, you're totally right. How about we do a way worse? Nothing, buddy. But even that scene had stakes to it. The cops were out there to shoot everyone.

This is just like a fucking party at an animation factory. Also, something I will say about the mask as like just in terms of effects. The mask, in the original movie like he's doing a whole bunch of stuff like I remember the horn blowing up the car and all that stuff

that's cool the not really one the only thing they do is the I thing yes that was the the one thing they took from the original was like let's just do that joke a hundred thousand times

yeah and it'll be the same exact movie well the weird thing is like they make it they make a point of that Jim Carrey in that movie is kind of a man child and loves cartoons and that's why what he does is cartoonish then why wouldn't the same thing be for Jamie Kennedy because he loves cartoons also exactly and like trying to actually play

up the cartoonish angst and like they kind of do it with the kid but like oh don't even we'll get we're gonna get there and I want to throw up but it's so yeah yeah yeah but it's not like Roger Rabbit where it's just like the kids doing like funny little cigar gags and shit like that and I almost did this

it's so much worse so we're dancing we're doing i love you baby and through like country western neel diamonds yeah it's just everywhere you just want to throw up it makes him the life of the party and then he instantly leaves he goes home and he fucks his wife while wearing the mask you like the mask never had sex nope jim carries mask never had sex no as far as i know it was just a series of well-placed Auga's. But that's about it. Like, he comes home and he's like, hey, baby, I've got a hard erection. I forget, does she

does say beforehand, like, we're going to have sex tonight? She does say that or no? Yes, she says, well, she definitely want, I don't think she's necessarily expecting it that night. Yes, she definitely is, because grabbing his crotch. She says, she says, here's what's going to happen. Like, she, because she apologizes that she can't make the Halloween party. Oh, and she says, I have a lot of work to

I'm sorry, go to the party, have fun. And when you come back, our lives will be changed forever. Like she says, like, let's come, you know, come home, we'll get it on. It'll be a great Saturday, you know. And because this movie is written by an eight-year-old, the next day she's pregnant.

Yes. Which is crazy talk. And it's not like times past and it's bad editing, literally the next day. She's like, geez, I was throwing up and I went to the doctor and I'm pregnant and there's a baby in there. This all happened in 28 hours.

And I don't believe the pregnancy is advanced because it's a god baby inside of her either. It's just... I mean, you know that they, it's not advanced because he has a line about like, I've been waiting to meet you for nine months. Yes, exactly. Dude, we get a sonogram scene and then they just do the baby in the belly. They do the Cuban Pete in, of course, on the sonogram. Listen, this baby has no frame of reference for what he's doing.

Thank you. Thank you for bringing this up. How can the thing that has no baby? for anything. Make these obscure pop culture references. Maybe Jamie Kennedy's wife was just watching the actual map. Nope. Yeah, you know what? Maybe. So cut to the B and or A storyline. Because a lot of this movie now,

it's all about getting Jamie Kennedy off screen. Like literally, that was a mandate from somebody. It's like, look, we bet, we bet wrong. Yep. He's not going to be the mask of this whole movie. We're changing that. and we're just going to have a bunch of competing storylines to get him off screen. And that's a big thing, right? Because I had never seen this movie until watching it for the show.

I was always under the impression that somehow Jamie Kennedy was the son of the mask. He was the Stan Ipkis offspring. Sure. And son of was like a, you know, whatever. Yeah, exactly. Like we're making a sequel.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. But this is like he is literally the son of this demon thing. if you bought a ticket which nobody was buying tickets for nothing with this movie but in the off chance you were one of these people that was like holy shit mask too finally if you're buying a ticket either as a fan of the mask or as a fan of jamy kennedy to see him as the mask that sex scene is the last you see him as the mask until the last 10 minutes of this movie we don't even get to see the sex scene thank god for that there's no cartoon fucking going on

disagree yeah you know what i was looking for some i in the bedroom scene. Dude, think about what it could do. Oh, yeah. His mask penis? At the very least, I wanted a Kathleen Turner and Sam Waterston and Serial Mom. Does anybody else see Serial Mom?

Yes. Where they bag? The whole fucking bed is like jumping up in the air. I don't remember a second of that movie. Oh, okay, and then I'm just a pervert. That cartoonish sex scene stuck in your head. Or maybe a funny gag where like her hair is blown all over the place and she's like

where did that come from and then she looks over oh my god why are you green just I mean anything like Cameron Diaz then right have some stuff in there something about yeah sure why not well no here's my question though so it's like hey I'm gonna rock your world tonight yes is she on birth

control is she not on birth control I think she's not because she wants to have a baby but they didn't agree like they haven't like really talked about what he thinks that's fair and also as I mean remember the mask sperm. Well, yeah, it's going to go. That's the thing. They can get through...

It's a home run every time, I guess. Yeah, they can't be stopped. Exactly. Like, whether it's pills or some sheepskin nothings, you know, like, you're busting through whatever it is. You're just doing it. Which, by the way, just because it was marked, I mean, it was clearly marketed to kids. Yeah. There wasn't

four kids, but it was certainly marketed to kids. Right. And you have these fucking CGI mask spurs. Oh, yeah. Just yimiamin. Wait, they have masked sperm? You didn't see the scene? Wait, what? There's mask,

sperms. Wait, I thought you were positing that you wanted to see masks. No, no, no, no. Maybe I saw the director's cut. Shut the flying fuck up. The director's cut of this movie? Explain what you're talking about.

There's a scene. They go, like, when they're having sex, like they go into a little, like, a fish eye thing, and they're like, the sperms. And you go inside of the woman. What? No, you don't, really? Yes.

It's like, look, who's talking? Yes. Wow. There's no alternate versions listed on IMDB. Are you sure you weren't smoking weed? I have my computer right here and I can pull it up right now. You know what? Ladies and gentlemen, we were pausing the recording.

He's getting this out because the three of us have no idea what he's talking about. Ladies and gentlemen, some new evidence has come to light. I have white hair now. What the hell was that? Yeah, it happens. Apparently this was a deleted scene. It was in the cut I saw. So in the cut that we saw that Andrew, Eric, and I saw separately.

It's just he comes through with, honey, I'm home, and he. He lays in bed, it's totally silhouette, and we cut to the next morning and we know what happened. Right. And Chris's cut. Chris's cut. They like zoom in on like a petri dish of sperm. It's like CSI shit. It goes right to her belly.

And then goes into her belly. And there's a bunch of normal sperms. And then like the three stooges of mask sperms. By the way, the mask is kind of not shooting that strong. Huh? There's only three of them in there. But they, I mean, they're like, well. Hollow point. They're like hollow point sperm.

They're more money. And they came out of his face. It's true. Right? Because it would have traveled from his face. Yeah. This is unbelievable. Three mask-esque sperm. Is his dick green? Here's the question. Because of the mask, as you know, it's just a mask. His face is green. Everything else is. Your hands are still normal. His dick is gang green.

Well, he can, I will say, considering what he does with his leg in the first scene of after he He can elongate his little Reed Richards That could definitely happen. So it's a Three Stooges bit with like Let me in that chowderhead And there's this three sperm

Fighting to get inside this fucking egg And it's disgusting And they ram right into it And that thing lights up green Oh Mercy me This is this should not exist This is like looking at the Ark of the Covenant

Steve's face melt it off I can't That's unbelievable So, yeah, so she comes home the next day. She's pregnant. Whoopty fuck. And he's like freaking out, you know. And then we just kind of cut to like...

Oh, by the way, he was promoted because his performance at the Halloween party was so good. Yep. This has potential. Oh, you probably won't have great animation ideas if you can come to a Halloween party like that. Well, I think the pitch is like

that character is the cartoon. This could be a franchise. character, yeah. But then it's totally not that. Like, later he's pitching like all sorts of things that aren't. Well, that's after he blows it. Oh, right. Yeah, he does blow it. That could sustain a whole season of television.

We cut to Alan coming on a beach and fucking Bob Hoskins. Whatever. Dup. Pacing himself. Oh, done up as Odin. Yeah, he's got one eye, so they got that part right.

He looks like he just woke from doing a stint on fucking time bandits. Like he was in time bandits and fell asleep for 30 years and they woke him up to do this. I mean, this is, you know, he just, what they, how they introduce Odin in this movie is like he, the camera will zoom in on a character's mouth hole or an eyeball or whatever. And once we get extreme enough, we then shoot back out there. the other end with him going, Loki! And it's just Bob Hoskins.

My son was born of the mask. Just looking like a big idiot in this costume. Where's my mask, Loki? Why am I from New York if I'm a North God? Loki, I need that mask because I'm taking Maria to WrestleMania. Loki, I only have four lines. And one of them is give me the mask. It's outrageous.

This fucking casting. Why, and also Alan Cumming is doing his normal flat American accent, obviously Scottish. Why do they both need to be American? What is that about? I think it's because they couldn't come to a middle ground on their, like, European accent. Here's the thing, unless you are luckily enough, Stellant Scarsguard and are accurate, and Lars von Trier as Loki and Odin, which that's a movie I want. Oh, yeah.

I think if you actually made a documentary about the tumultuous, relationship between Lars von Trier and Stellan Scarsgard it would be called Loki and Odin Colin figure it out well I mean if you get Venture in this costume that Bob Hoskins has to fucking wedge himself

into oh man and a lot most of this movie is Bob Hoskins just screaming in front of a camera because he's in this scene he's appearing in the clouds closet oh yeah he's in a janitor's closet with three green boxes around him so they put him anywhere we do your one shot

of Asgard or whatever, and it's like an asteroid with a bunch of dead dinosaur bones on it? Yeah, that looks really stupid, too. It's a dinosaur graveyard. I killed the dinosaurs, Loki. I got rid of Ed Gisselba. He was asking for too much. Man, and I thought Anthony Hopkins was slumming it in that Marvel movie

or two. No way. No, no. No way. That's that regal grandeur. He's got Bob Hoskins. At least he's getting the fuck up here. At least he's got a gold eye patch. He doesn't look like a degenerate on the bus with a crusted over... You're so right. If I saw this Odin walk under the New York City bus, I'd be like, oh, yeah, that makes sense.

I don't want him to sit next to me. He looks like the loser of a bum fight. I'm the god of all Norse mythology. Yeah, sure you are. Monkey! Yeah, exactly. Oh, man, this homeless guy was harassed me in the fucking Port Authority bathroom.

I lost this eye in a bomb fight. a raven packed out my eyes sure it did old man were you wrestling a hamburger away from it I killed the last hamburger replaced him with a model so loki is tasked to find the mask which if he has he has all these magical powers but he can't like know where this is instinctually this is a very frustrating thing because you're right. Also, Anthony Hopkins

as Odin knows where the mask is. No, you mean Bill Bill, uh, oh my God, Bob Hoskins. Bob Hoskins knows where the mask is and Alan Cumming is even like, father, you know where this is. Just let me know. And he's like, no, Loki. This is something you's got to do all by yourself because I got a prep to get down to WrestleMania. And this Hulkomania t-shirt ain't kind of irons itself. Renee Russo's been on my back all day. Oh, God, so you just get Alan coming,

pretending to be door-to-door salesmen, plumbers, he pulls a looper. He looks up the fucking birth date of all these kids who were born on this day, and he's like, I got to kill him all. Dude, he's ringing the doorbell, and he's going, Sarkana.

Yes. Well, I don't think he's killing the kids. He might be killing the parents, though. Yeah, oh, for sure. Oh, they're getting trapped in some sort of magical entanglement. One of them, yeah, he's traveling sales. man he sucks a woman up into a vacuum cleaner that's dead that's death yeah she's just

straight dead just a fucking bag of coming out like something from freaked one of us and then she just you know I mean then Alan coming just like hangs out the kid and it's like oh be the one and it's like it doesn't do anything he's like do something crazy

yeah it doesn't something like the mask does and it's like you would know wouldn't you know if could you smell it or something there's magic in the room, you know, like, something. Well, there was magic in the room when they were filming this movie. I'll tell you that. I was going to say, that's what they say when we

walk into a place. Oh, there's just magic in the room. Speaking of movie magic. The baby is born. He immediately turns to be five and a half years old. This kid is old. Yeah. Yeah. And like, Jamie Kennedy is, you know, he's progressing in Stephen Wright's

fucking pyramid scheme. The feds haven't found me yet. get a nice, really lame montage of, man, when you have a baby, you just can't sleep. Oh, Jesus. We're just going through it. And

Trailer Howard is like, look, I got to go away to New York for no good reason. I'm going to leave you with our kid because it's our kid and you're the father and that's how that shit works. And really it's very clear she's making all the money in the relationship, right? It's incredibly clear. He's

a dude who dresses up like a turtle to give tours of an animation he's a classic movie loser yes and you know you're thinking like is he going to overcome this is that animation deal going to happen and meanwhile nobody could

give less of a cold fuck what happens to this character but also like why not give him like a normal office job like in history of violence fucking Vigo Mortensen has a diner job to balance out the lawyer wife he has

like that's enough like he's this is like something again a nephew does but it's not even as if this character is intelligent enough to be that shitty about being upset that his wife is the breadwinner no he's just

like I'm gonna play Game Boy and write my dumb cartoons all day and ignore you because you're a woman you know she has to go out of town for a week or whatever and he has to watch the baby but he's got that big network pitch for his cartoon right he has to do the pitch for which Stephen Wright's like okay

talk to you later like he doesn't have notes he's not like i want daily drawings i want daily meetings i want to know what our pitch is right what's our pitch i need i need assistant editor and animators around oh of course to you yeah it's just like so here's your chance he's an animation god he should be able to like even if that pitch goes sour you should be able to spin some don draper gold or something exactly but like imagine a chocolate buy i grew up in a horror house tears. God, I need that in this movie. So a lot of this is him working on this pitch

and the baby just starts being the mask, basically. It starts doing some stuff. We take some time off as a movie, which is nice. Yep. To show the Michigan J. Frog comic cartoon. Twice in this movie, you're forcing me to watch better cartoons with the Looney Tunes Michigan J. Frog bit. He's watching the Flintstone.

at one point, because he also starts emulating Bam Bam. Well, he gets, from the Michigan J. Frog thing, you get a nice little bubble above his head. Thought bubbles. Thought bubbles. His character's having a thought bubble. And he realizes he can make his dad look crazy because I guess it's clear that he likes

the mother more or something. He likes, yeah, he likes the mother more. He thinks the dad's a doofus. He also gleans that like the dad likes the dog more. Yeah. So it's like, yeah, a lot more than everybody. The baby, rightly so. The son of the mask is like fuck this clown

but this is when we start getting some real bad CGI with this baby and it's creepy and it's gross because it's just good enough to gross me out I actually it's not like oh I'm watching a bad cartoon like the fucking alley McBeal dancing baby in in my notes I actually wrote is this a horror

movie because of what's going on with this kid there were a couple of times I was shocked at what I'm watching because the baby turns the exorcist the head turns into Woody Woodpecker I freaked the fuck out I was like, what the fuck was that? The baby, right after the baby has done doing the,

Hello, my baby, the Michigan is J. Frog. Which is gross. And terrifying on its own. It comes right up in front of the camera, that goddamn animorphic lenses right there. And the head turns into Woody the Woodpecker, and we get a Woody laugh. This fucking baby.

It's disgusting. I was terrified. And also the sounds editing and stuff in this movie is terrible. Well, the editing period is fucking horrendous. It's like he's just playing a clip when he's supposed to be singing this stuff. Yes, exactly. Like, I hear like the background noise of when the real singer sang it. Oh, is that my tea?

Hello, my honey. Just like hire someone to sing it or do, I don't know. You know who I might want to be in this movie? Yep. Frank Welker. Absolutely. Let's get the master in here. The dark master.

You know what? Son of the master. you can't afford me, said Frank Welker. I got $60,000 to voice a dog in space jam. This is like a dire situation. This is when you need a Welker. You need to welker that up a bit. It's crazy.

Can you afford a Jim Welker, his brother? Noted football player Wes Welker. He might be part of the clan. Lou Welker. So, yeah, it's a bunch of gross stuff. he's doing it. We are just playing out the Michigan. We're cutting between two cartoons at this point. The middle of this movie is

he's playing Michigan J. Frog with his father and the dog who has found the mask and knows how to kill the baby for some well because he feels neglected because he's been like loved. Because he hasn't been fucked in that room lately. I mean, right? That's what we're telling you.

I mean, he hasn't been a while since Jamie Kennedy took the top bunk. Yeah. I mean, but the weird thing is like That, when the dog turned into the mask in the first movie, it was a big applause moment. I was like, woo, the dog's a mask now! For like half a minute in that first movie. It's a throwaway joke.

You know what I mean? This is a crucial plot point that this dog multiple times is putting on the mask in this movie. More than three minutes screen time. Yes. 10 to 12 in a pretty short movie. Yes, the dog wearing the mask is a central character. And he basically, it turns into a Tom and Jerry. bit. So we're doing Tom and Jerry versus

Michigan J. Frog for the middle of this movie and Jamie Kennedy is nowhere to be found. No. It's just gross computer animation. Computer animated antics and I want to throw up the entire time. I don't know what's worse. The baby or the dog. I think the baby because it's like

they're trying to make it look realistic but that's actually the wrong way to go with it. Yes. If you're going to just turn it into a cartoon, frankly. The whole fucking thing. I agree. And there's one point The dog's eyes fall out, which is kind of a living nightmare. That is sheer terror.

Shear terror. These dead dog eye sockets just looking at you. And I understand I'm bringing reason into an unreasonable situation. If you're, clearly you're rich, look at this fucking house and, you know, your wife's doing business things. Yeah, she's a business. Hire a nanny. Or, unless they're all dead, ask one of the grandparents. Right, yeah.

And you don't say that, so I assume you all have parents. So let them have some time with kids. I could use an old codger freaking out these baby. You need Ray Walson across the street to be like, what the fuck's happening? There's an old lady neighbor. Oh, yeah, that's true. Who comes to nothing. It's kind of like the neighbor from Babaduke, actually.

Yeah, she got this. Loki's going house to fucking house. And I guess killing people. Hopefully. Fingers crossed, he's taken lives. finally comes to Jamie Kennedy's house after eight minutes of an animation interlude. There's a lot of, we're just

turning to straight cartoon in this movie. Yep. For no reason. Including the ending. And like Jamie Kennedy is going crazy in quotation marks, which again he doesn't pull off because he's not, he's like trying to be panicked and like antic, I guess, or

manic? Manic is the word of movie movie. Yeah, but he just comes off like every other scenes starring Jamie Kennedy. Which is to say his hair's messed up and he's in a very nasally tone yelling at someone Alan Cumman comes to his house finally as a UPS guy

and he's got the son of the mask in his hands like are you the son of the mask? Are you the son of the mask? And it's a baby because the baby can turn it on and off. Yep. And he's just like well I have no mythical way to know whether or not you are so I guess you're not maybe they were all sons of the mask. Who knows?

You don't have like a Norse metal detector that you're just like that's some of mine. Loki. Lokey. look harder. I mean, don't you think that kid could be the mask? You're breaking my boroughs here, Loki. How many

feet tans does that child have? If you don't get that mask back to me, I got nothing aware to support mankind at WrestleMania. So, just when Alan Cummings ready to pull away, Jamie Kennedy's like,

I got to take this kid to the doctor or the office or whatever. Or an exorcist. They get in the car and he's like, something, something. It's like the exorcist. And this baby who somehow has knowledge of the P-Soup scene and the Exorcist turns its little stupid computer head around and vomits all over this car. But it's like neon green.

Oh, it's mask-gak. It's Nickelodeon. It's getting the deluge. Oh, this is where the Gak is from or whatever. Is that what do they call that stuff? Gack. Oh, yeah. And Loki, who's in his car.

Which is how he gets from place to place. Yep. Uh-huh. Not flying or just teleporting like any God would. I appreciate that Loki buys American. Sure. He's not a Toyota man. I get it.

It's before he pulls out. He's like, oh, wait, I do think now maybe that baby might be the son of the mask. Right. So we like follow around for a little. I mean, there's a confrontation in an alley at some point, which is silly. Yeah, with the baby smushing Loki with two dumpsters. Oh, that's, well, because that's the thing. is like, all of a sudden, for no reason in this movie,

this baby stops hating Jamie Kennedy and is like, I'm going to protect him from my crazy Uncle Loki or whatever. And yeah, the baby turns itself into his shield and gets fire blasted. That's kind of terrifying. And Bob Hoskins is furious about what's going on. He's possessing all sorts of people

to try to interfere now. Oh, that's right. He possesses Jamie, right? He possesses Jerry Minor at one point who's working in some, like, novelty store. A mask shopkeeper. But here's the thing. Are Norse God, where is Thor in this movie?

Are all the Norse gods roaming the earth? Or is this like the last hurrah? It's like, we're turning the tables up, Loki. Well, I think the... Get that mask back up to Asgard. It sounds like all the North Scots are like, like, Loki, not Loki. Odin's like, dude, we had our time on Earth. We got to go.

There's stopping to believe it. So get your fucking mask. We're packing it in with the rest of this stuff. and we're going to Mars. Mars. It sounds like. It sounds like he's like, get all your belongings that you left on Earth.

We're leaving this fucking place. I thought there'd be more people up here on Mars. It's like, it's like a kid and you're trying to leave a hotel. It's like, did you get your Game Boy? Like, no, I left it upstairs. Well, go up there and find it. I'm not going to help you.

You should check under the bed. Because once we leave North Carolina, we're going back to New York. York. So the wife comes back from a business trip, and the baby has been kidnapped at this point. He's already lost his job. Yep. Oh, right.

Yeah, that happened. Because, like, the whole week, he's, like, trying to draw animation, which is really time-consuming, and you can't do with a baby. And you also can't do by yourself, no. Well, my favorite thing is that, and it goes back to the Chad conundrums. Right, because, yeah, Stephen Wright was going to pass it off to. Steve Wright's like, hey, do you need some help? help. We've got Chad here. But that's the whole thing. I can't let Chad work on it because Chad's going to take credit for it. But here's your creator of the fucking thing. Well, that's

one thing. But B, it's not like Chad is seen constantly like, oh man, I'm going to get his scheme. No, it's just a dude who's like, I'll help out. It's like, hey, man, I'll help. I'm happy to help. Chad is the good guy. Exactly. I think he's the hero of the fucking movie. Jamie Kennedy's the bad guy. And he goes and he makes him like bullshit presentation and gets fired. And of course, like, yeah, again, like, Stephen and I'd be like, hey, before we get that presentation, want to sit down and do it for me? Like, real quick. Can I see it before we do it for the network? Exactly right. Oh, you have nothing? All right, I'll tell them how I was raised in a horace. I'll go back to that well again. Cry over that goddamn candy bar to launch

a third cartoon. Don't worry. I'm just going to pass this, you know, just pitch this to a guy named Matthew Viner. What would be fine? The carousel. It's where all your life's dreams. come true. Remember me with my young kids? Here's me doing stand-up in Oklahoma. Here's me in Bob Kent Goldthwaite opening up a planet Hollywood. Here's my voice in Reservoir

Dog. It's the first time I met Louis C.K. That's just it. The carousel is all of our lives. There's nostalgia. It keeps spinning. Life. My first comedy's

Central special This is my first actual deep dish pizza in Chicago This is when I was on Comics Unleashed with Brian Allen That was fun We hit a lot of important Hot Button issues in that

episode So Bob Hoskins is pissed All right Loki I'm going to take away your powers For one and a half scenes And he does And then like He goes to Loki goes to the kids' room

and makes some invocation casts a spell, yeah. And gets Bob Hoskins back and he's like, Dad, look how good I am. Please give me my powers back. All right, I'll give you one hour, Roger. So he's got an hour to get like the son of the mask and

find the mask. He doesn't want the baby really. Like he has to get the mask back. Yeah, exactly. He used the baby's leverage essentially. Which, and also if anyone was wondering, mask is buried out in the dog's dog house. Because the mask means nothing in this movie. Yes.

It's all about the son of the mask. Right. As the title would suggest, I guess. Loki immediately goes to the baby, and then he radios in dad again. And he's like, give me back my powers. And Bob Hoskins is like, okay, Loki, I was so hard on you before. Like, he is sort of the quintessential, like, pussy parent. Yeah.

Like, just bend. He's like the homer bending to Bart all the time. All right, boy. You won't be grounded this time, kind of a thing. But one great thing that happens there is Loki gets his powers back. Yep. He's in the family's house and the baby's room. And that older lady down the street is all getting.

Being nosy. Yeah, nosy. So he turns her head into a giant nose. Terrify. Holy God, this is terrifying. And then she sneezes. The whole lawn gets a booger bath. It's disgusting.

Which also reminds me, by the way, we left out, there's one point where Jamie Kennedy, in the fatherly montage of being, when the wife's away, the boys will play, is drinking his own son's piss because he's getting douched with like five streams of urine. A fountain. A fountain of piss.

Does this kid have multiple dicks? Because it's multiple streams of, like, yes. You've got to go to a urologist. You have to go to a pediatric urologist. All right, everybody. I think he's got like, I think he's got eight dicks down there. He's like the Vishnu of cack. But then, like, he gets a super-soaker dick and, like...

Oh, yeah, they all merge. It's a blasts him away. It's disgusting. It's like a water can. It's gnarly. At some point, also in the film... Loki, your son's pissing on Jamie Kennedy. You want to get down there, please?

Also, at some point, Loki, like, eats someone's fart in this movie. Well, that happens later. Oh, is it later? Yeah, he eats the masks for it. So pardon me. He steals the baby. He dresses up like the wife to like say, hey, you know, he like tries to trick him into like giving him the mask. Having sex again.

He doesn't. So when the wife, he steals the baby. And when the wife comes home, Jamie Kennedy abuses this woman to a point. Throwing her all over the place. And she's like, you know, it's the girlfriend from dirty work. You know, she's a small woman. He's just fucking chokeslamming her. And I'm like, whoa.

Not the movie I wanted to watch. It's so weird. Yes. But he beats the shit out of her. And she's like, wait, I'm not a Norse God. And he's like, oh, okay. Yeah, he's like, oh, I'm sorry. I was punching you in the face then.

Oh, weird. And she's just like, oh, whatever. Their baby's kidnapped. So they have to go. He's like, oh, I know where the mask is. Otis has it. And Otis, of course, he's like, oh, yeah, there's a really sexy dog that he likes. Like, oh, no, is this dog's sex life?

It's disgusting. Oh, I know that my dog, as the mask would be at this other dog's house trying to rail it. Let's go to where this other dog lives. He's been laying some seeds with this dog. Yeah. Over the years.

He's been playing the long game with this. Now it's time for it to happen. I think he's called Jamie Kennedy Wilder running is like, yeah, he knows this sexy little piece on, you know, whatever avenue or whatever. Like, it's gross. Jesus Christ. And that goes back.

I mean, that's like the days of Jim Belushi getting Jerry Lee laid. Yes. Oh, don't you find that hot piece? pooch there or what? Oh man, her genitals are getting pretty hot for you there. Oh, Jerry Lee, take a whiff of that. God. Damn it. And like the dog has made some romantic dog date. It's like, whatever. Just fuck. Like, dogs don't have dates. They fuck. Even if you are the masked dog, you would just fuck. But we're referencing Lady in the Tramp because we love talking about cartoons that are

better than us. Speaking of that, we haven't talked about it really quick. quickly, his name, Jamie Kennedy's name is Tim Avery in this movie and I want to throw up. Oh, yeah. Because it's Tex Avery, which is where, you know, where all those Oh! Oh, yeah, I know, right, Chris? Oh, weird, mask. Oh, that's awful.

So this is sacrilegious to more than just the Norse. And like, that has to be a line item of trivia on the IMDB. Like, I want to be like, no, that's not useful. That's stupid. Yeah, there's no selection on IMDB like was this useful it's like yes or no not like this is the dumbest thing

like everyone knew like on the iTunes like was this review helpful yes or no was this fucking fact useful absolutely not so he he takes the dog the mask off the dog they go to Loki who they're playing this weird twister game it's gross it's like mask like twister for the mask people where we can stretch our limbs all over the place put our ears on things and then the baby tickles him with his ear yeah the ear just

starts pulling out of the head it's disgusting at this point Loki says oh you're cool I want to hang out with you baby and maybe we'll be best pals right right right and then he turns back into Super Loki which is stupid and then Jamie Kennedy's putting the mask on and

like whatever they have a mask fight in a boxing ring yes we're in a gymnasium where we're just going to mask box for some reason. This is what he farts at Loki's mouth and Loki's like, ew. He's like, oh, I'm eating a fart, Jamie Kennedy. Someone got paid a million dollars

for this movie. Eating fucking mask farts. I would think a million dollars went to anybody on this movie. You don't think anyone got paid over million? I think you probably spent over a million dollars making it. I don't think a million dollars

went to any single part of it. No, Jamie Kennedy got like two or three million bucks. Are you fucking... Really? Is that, was that an heckler? You know, you shouldn't call me Hitler because I made $2 million. Hitler never made that much. So, yeah, whatever. I mean, the Norse god of mischief eats a fart.

And then it boils down to much like trying to get a dog to decide. Like, it's allegiance. It's like, come on, come to me. Come to your father. No, come to Uncle Loki, blah, blah, blah. And then, of course, Jamie Kennedy rips off the mask. And he's like, I'm your dad. Come to me.

And the baby picks him, of course. And then fucking Bob Hoskin come down. We show us up. We do. And we've got a weird stand in where like, because he's Odin and he can't be short little Bob Hoskins. So like there must be some dude like Kevin Nash. They like, they super post his face on there because like he's tall, right? Like yeah.

As tall as Alan Cumming, which he absolutely isn't. I think it was just Nash put Hoskins on his shoulders. And you just dress up the whole thing. Well, he's wearing a bunch of Game of Thrones garbs, so you can't see who's like... You can hide Nash under that. Exactly. Just like... And he's like, all right, Loki, you failed.

You didn't get me the mask. So now I'm taking your powers forever. And intervenes Jamie Kennedy as the newly donned father of the year. Yeah. And he's like, it's your job to be a good father. And your son loves you and just come together and just here's the mask everybody. Whatever. It didn't matter.

Even though I almost killed my child, well, I would say at least three dozen times. Is anybody hungry for another fart? Let's just gnaw on a part together. Get your knives and forks out for the next fart. You should let Loki die or whatever. Sure. Or like, here's the thing, Bob Hoskins, you're such a great fucking all father, right? You wouldn't it be more troublesome for like the lives of,

mortals to have this fucking super energy being that that is the son of the mask. Yeah. Then just this mask causing mischief wouldn't he be like, oh, Loki, by the way, I got to kill that kid. There has to be something about like... Or a depowering. Yeah. We're always

checking in on you. But yeah, if he can remove Loki's power, Bing, Bang, Boom. Now your baby's just a normal baby. Well, that's the... It's like, why... Finally a baby I can take with me to WrestleMania. I mean, like, why can it be a, and mother to me, seen?

Like, I kind of was waiting for that. He tries to steal this baby. He's like, I'm fucking tired of you, Alan, coming. Your spirit is going into this baby. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah, why not? But that doesn't happen.

Loki and Odin kiss and makeup, and they go back to Asgard. For what? They just go play with dinosaur bones. I guess. There's a new T-Rex femur I want to show you as Loki. Real great addition

to a dino graveyard we live in. We have to colonize an alternate reality. You can see me and Loki in our new sequel Son of the Mask's Ghosts of Mars. Starring Ice Cube.

A store. ice cube would make a pretty good door I'd buy it I don't go for that one he's worthy to hold a hammer so Jimmy Kennedy now comes up with an idea

to do a dog v. baby cartoon and I'm laughing my nuts off the whole time and we finally got an actual real cartoon in this thing and Stephen Wright loves it hey I think that's a really

brilliant idea what a breakthrough hey Tim Avery that sounds a lot like tech savory and actually this idea is very much like those Tom and Jerry cartoons without the cat.

Hey, Auga. As Kay Billy's Supersounds of the 70s keep on trucking. The old green bag. So he's an ultra success. Sure. He's the next Warner brother.

He's the newest Warner brother. Welcome to the fold. Yeah. And they're just sitting at home. He realizes he doesn't hate his son's That's nice. Yeah, he accepts his clear lifelong disability as the son of the mask. Wait till this kid gets to grade school.

Dude, wait till this kid hits puberty. Oh, yeah. Hell on earth. You know what I'd be saying if I was Jamie Kennedy? Wait till this kid hits the foster home. Because there's no the fuck way I'm dealing with that. No, you've got to cobble pot this kid. You put him in a little cage and put him down to let penguins raise him.

Yeah. And we're sitting at home and they're watching the cartoon, which we get. to see because I got to see this genius unfold and she's like honey that's a really great cartoon we you just saw there oh fantastic you're a genius what did you think little baby oh that's cool also by the way hey little baby what do you think about being a big brother and it's like she's just knocked up again eyebrow raise from this creepy baby cg yes oh that's right that's what we zoom in on the baby and it's just like the people's eyebrow goes up my name is Alvi

Avery credits I have to find my parents oh no I can't do my Danny DeVito because it's exactly my pop-paws people might figure it out and that's the end of the movie we're just at credits

of fucking nonsense this movie is 8 a what is it 92 minutes of nonsense some versions are 92 minutes 93 minutes is the cut you want this is also a movie where you feel every minute I don't know. Every last second. If we're going to go around

would you recommend this? Would you recommend it? I would not. And we say this a lot. I do think it might be the worst movie you ever done with the exception of Nuki always being up there. But Nuky's a little more fun at least because you got the South African dubbing factor. Yes. This is like there's money here.

The strangeness factor in Nuky kind of outweighs it. Like it's just an odd thing that happened. But like this clearly we were trying to to hit several different demographics and we missed every single one of them. And let me

point out that this is 2005 we've already had at least one Lord of the Rings movie. So New Line, this is an interesting time for New Line because it's right at the point of like we've got all of this Lord of the Rings move money. And we're going to waste it all. And we're going to waste it

on things like semi-pro and son of the mask and then eventually we're going to fuck that whole success up so much that our parent company absorbs us and we get to pretend like we never existed. They should have just shelved it. I mean, they offered it to everybody.

Jack Black was offered. He said absolutely not. Yep. I can't imagine there was a comedian working at the time that they didn't offer this to. But it's weird too because the other thing you're asking of people and certainly Jamie Kennedy is not up to the task is...

Which I don't even think is his fault. I don't even think this movie is his fault. It's totally not at all. He's not up to the... What was that line? What? Nothing. No, I'm just saying like,

it's, you'd be very hard-pressed to find someone who can successfully follow a manic physical Jim Carrey performance like this. Because he's the best of the best at that stuff. You know what? Yeah, exactly. Maybe Chris Farley's the mask. But we couldn't get that, obviously. A little, a little too late for Mask, too.

I'm just thinking about great physical comedians. Right. And that's the whole, and I feel like that's a lot of why we're dealing with a dancing baby screen saver and not an actor playing the mask. I mean, it's exactly like, what, they offered Amy Poller and Luis C.K. The Daily Show. Nobody wants the chair. Nobody wants it. You're totally right. It's just really ridiculous. So you watch the mask, which is not one of Jim Carrey's best movies. It's a pretty bad movie. But it's him going on all cylinders. Do you really want that? Nobody does. audience at large don't get us wrong we all think the mask is a bad movie it's a dull bad movie lifted by nothing other than jim carrie's performance as the character there's nothing else in honestly watch them back to back and the mask is is grounded the mask is at least grounded there's a story there but there's some kind of structure to it you got richard jenny you've got rose colored glasses when you do that because you watch the you watch i just watched it this week But that's what I'm saying.

You're watching the son of the mask first, which is eating a whole buffet of dog shit. And then you watch the mask. Which is one white castle hamburger. And you're like, wow, this is the best meal I ever had. Exactly. Sure, I guess. Yes. By the way, I won't recommend this movie.

It's a four way not recommend. No way. Was this what killed any potential for Jamie Kennedy? Yeah, I think so. I think he was dead on arrival. He just doesn't have it. You know, I think that he's. It was amazing that Malibu's most wanted ever got off the ground.

I am a little shocked by that, honestly, that that was ever a thing. That was before. I'm sorry, but the other one, kicking it old school. Well, honestly, the fact that he is asked to anchor a movie is insane to me. The fact that he was asked to anchor that weird LA Public Access New Year's Eve show, that's a great video. It's way more entertaining than son of the mass. He's a good number six. are number seven in a movie. Like,

Scream, he does well in Scream. In, like, ten years when Alexander Payne asks him to be, like, the bartender in a really big scene, it's going to be great. And he's going to be great in that scene. But, like, you've got to, now we're waiting for this scene. I will admit, from the first time I saw Scream One, I was like, I like this guy. Like, to me, at the time watching Scream, I'm like, he's a horror movie geek. That's exactly what I am. Yep.

That's pretty cool. Like, I saw myself represented in a movie. I did the same thing. It was the most I've ever regretted buying stock in someone. Like, I bought low and, man, did I sell even lower? That's son of the mask from 2005, directed by Lawrence Guterman. If you want to get a hold of us, check out our website, WHMpodcast.com, or find us on sideshownetwork.

Like us on Facebook and follow us on Twitter. We're at WHM podcast and right into the mailbag. We All Hate Movies at gmail.com. Rate and review the show in iTunes or wherever you get us. We would greatly appreciate it. Clue for next week's episode. Claire Daines. Claire Dane's a big one.

Yeah, Carrie Matheson. Carrie Matheson herself. Homeland Season 3. You asked for it. We're doing it. 30 hours of watching. So until next week when we're talking about Claire Daines in some capacity, I'm Andrew Jupin.

Chris Gavin. Eric Cisker. Steven Zeta. Take it easy.