We Hate Movies - S6 Ep219: Brainscan

Episode Date: October 6, 2015

On this week's episode, the 2015 Halloween Spooktacular kicks off in rare form as the WHM gang tackles Brainscan! Did they really think Trickster was going to be the next Freddy or Pinhead? Why do the rules of this game change every time Furlong plays? And had he lived, would Kyle have been Michael's best bud for life? PLUS: That fat guy was definitely not a foot tattoo guy! Brainscan stars Edward Furlong, Frank Langella, Amy Hargreaves, Jamie Marsh, and T. Ryder Smith; directed by John Flynn.  Unlock Exclusive Content!: http://www.patreon.com/wehatemovies

Hello, Mandra Jupin, Eric Cisca, Stephen Brainscan. And we hate movies. Yeah. We all go a little mad sometimes. You know, it's Halloween. I guess everyone's a title of one good scare. Sometimes. That is better.

Zombies of entrance to buildings. They're at the door. They're coming in. It is time to keep your appointment with the Wicter Man. They're coming to get you, Barbara. He's sick for fucks. He's seen one team anymore. Now, Sid, don't you blame the movies? Movies don't create psychos.

Movies make psychos. More creative! Put the fucking looser in the back! An excellent day for an exorcism. Hello, everyone. Welcome to We Hate Movies. Welcome to the first episode of the 2015 Halloween spooktacular. Yeah, we're getting right into it with a pseudo-cyber thriller. Yeah, I was wondering how do you categorize this.

It's almost, well, the Internet's not involved. The Internet's not involved. It's sort of involved, right? Because he has to dial. Yes. What was it? 1-800-Five-Five-Fee. 1-800-5-5-5-Fier.

In order to act. access the CD-ROM. So I think there's quasi, this is early internet. Yeah, it's kind of like you're playing missed and you need to like, I don't know, man, fucking read the scroll and jerk off a fucking monk or whatever happens in that game.

By the way, we're talking about brain scan from 1994, directed by John Flynn. You're fucking losing. I don't know. If you want to get to the lighthouse, you better, you better jerk off a box. start stroking. Oh, I don't know. I could get out of your way or I could not. What are we going to do

about this? It's up to you. Frye of Fox waiting. That's a whole different game. It's like a puzzle. You've got to rearrange his genitalia in order for the secret door to open. Oh, no, you were playing Trist. You should be playing mist. Ah, that explains a whole lot. So this movie is Edward Furlong is a real horror hound. He just loves one. watching horror movies and he's got a weird friend who's 27 years old playing like a 13 year old kid in this movie and he gives Kyle Kyle yeah please Kyle and he's Michael I believe yes Eddie Furlong is Michael so Mike and Kyle are horror hounds and Kyle's like hey man I read the new issue of fango which is apparently what you call Fangoria if you're a fan of Fangoria

magazine really? Fango sounds like a Greek yoke He's like, hey man, there's this new game that they're advertising somewhere towards the back. It's called Brain Scans. Well, it's great because this is the first horror movie that I ever experienced where Fangoria influenced the events, didn't report on the events. Right. Yeah, that's something. Yeah, I don't know. I never read Fangoria. It was always like, I'll breeze through it at the magazine stand. And I love horror movies as much as the next person. But I'm not reading Fangoria.

Nothing against Fangoria. Just like... We're going to get letters now. All these... How dare you not read Fangoria? Why don't you let up about how you didn't read a magazine? Fangoria still exists, right? In website forum, I'd wager.

Yeah, I don't know if they print. No, I would imagine. I mean, nobody prints anyone. Almost nobody. It's true. So also, you know you're in for a real dumb time. Like, I had no idea what this movie was. This was an Eric Siska favorite.

Oh, yeah. You've seen this how many times? Probably about five. Yeah, sounds about right. Yeah, you know, it was on TV a ton back in the day. Well, see, for me, as a brain scan newbie, a noob, I think, is you're looking at a weird. Yeah, we are talking about a cyber thriller.

You're going to get letters. Probably. From Noob Saibot. I believe it's actually noob, like my name, Noob Seibot. he's the titular noob he's the one that started at all oh man he's patient zero for nobs um no no it's like and you know eddie furlong uh uh frank langela and then it's like and some dude you've never heard from before as trickster and i'm like

yep get ready to get really stupid i don't know what this is but that sounds really dumb T-Rider Smith That's the trickster No it's not the trickster That's like the flash villain This dude is just trickster For legal purposes It's trickster

DC said we can't use it An indefinite article So he's just trickster Just trickster And let me tell you They wanted this thing To be the next Freddy Kruger It's so clear

It's like Freddy Kruger Meets Drop Dead Fred Yeah You know what I remember that movie Drop Dead Fred It's terrible right it's that obnoxious person's in it playing an imaginary friend right well it's like that because he's like he's a horror guy so it's like sort of like freddy kruger he's coming out of

the computer and study your dreams or whatever but he's like cheesy making jokes all over the place the problem with trickster is that he does nothing in this movie like it's it's like yeah this movie you tell is like oh man trickster t-shirts trickster masks trickster lunchbox yeah i was going to say masks especially trickster howly Halloween costumes. But he doesn't affect the story. He doesn't kill anybody. And he kind of just hangs out and like...

Yeah, he's the Charles Manson of this whole thing. But like he affects the story because he... And this is the level of trickery this guy gets. It's ridiculous. Trickstery. Edward Furlong is just like, no, I don't want to play that game anymore. But Michael, don't you want to play again? Okay, I'll play again.

Good idea. Yeah, and it's just like stuff went bad the first time. And this guy's identified himself. He introduced himself as Trickster. Yeah, exactly. You want to, like, if you're trying to fool this dumb kid, you've got to be like, hello, my name is Honest Dead. I'm here to play a game with you.

But also, let's get into Trickster a little bit. He is a demon or something. He exists in the nether realm of some kind. I believe he's a demon that is. is from a CD-ROM. Yeah, that's the other thing. CD-ROM demon only. I don't think he's from hell.

But he has a mailing address, apparently, some sort of sorting facility where he can mail these games. Yeah. He has an advertising branch where he's in good with Fangoria. Yeah, exactly. Well, not that good.

The ad was somewhere towards the back. You're right. He's got at least a P.O. box. Yeah, he's got, I think he's got at least at his Oh, did you mail that brain scan CD-ROM out today? Come on, Jeremy. You're not going to get college credit unless all these are mailed out by the end of the day.

I see here you were the personal assistant for Trickster. Could you speak on that experience and where you want to be in five years? Well, that's my biggest question about this whole movie is just the logistics of the brain scan. operation. Okay? So like this dude Kyle's like hey man here's this game blah blah blah and Eddie Furlong's like kind of he's dubious about the whole thing

because he's played them all. He's played all the horror games. He's seen all the horror movies. You know he's really just like numb to the whole thing. And we'll quickly say why he's sort of numb to the whole thing is this movie starts with him as a child crawling out of a car

wreck. Oh yeah. His mom is splattered against the pavement. I don't know. This car must have been hit by a grenade. I don't know what happened to this car. I was he in like, I don't know, the Gulf War? Like, where is his car? It's unbelievable. So, yeah, he's had, like, you know, reconstructive knee surgery.

So he walks with a limp. And, like, you know, the whole thing is he's just a dark kid because his mom's dead and he's angry at the world. And his dad abandoned him in his giant California mansion. Yeah, just some so-and-so businessman who's never home. Well, that's, yeah, he called, the only thing. time we hear about him is he leaves he leaves a message like hey mike how's it going uh business as well hope you're good talk to you never again yeah like see you later movie um but no so he's like all right he's he's he's like dubious about the game and he's Kyle's trying to convince him to do it

so the first part of like brain scan magic in this movie is edward furlong is in his room or you know where there's a command center because he's like kind of a hacker and he's like I don't know. This brain scan sounds pretty stupid. And then like a light from the heavens comes down and he's like kind of possessed and has a like a seizure for a second. Right? It's just like this random seizure. And like he's not even hooked into the game at all. So I was like, wow, these are some mystical ass powers from brain scan. Right. Yeah. But we're still using the fucking post office for part of it. Hey, Jeremy, what you need to do is possess souls that may be talking ill about brain. that's your new summer assignment and those CDs better be gone by the time I get back I think

that's it it's just a rinka-dink operation like like Lucifer kicked out trickster a while ago now trickster is like trying to get in his good graces by doing evil on earth I got a pretty good severance package from Lucifer eight grand not bad yeah he's probably got his hands in a lot of stuff too like like junk mail you think tricksters behind junk mail i think he's yeah he annoys people oh watch this jeremy

none of these people requested these l lb in catalogs but they're getting them anyway the pottery pod for you so he he caves and he mails in and you know

trickster gets his envelope by guess Jeremy, have you seen that pile of forever stamps? They were right here on my desk just yesterday afternoon. Oh, Jeremy, you mixed up the brain scan discs again. This one's supposed to go to South Korea, you moron. That's actually a really good question. How many customers at a time is like brain scan LTD able to handle? Is the trickster being stretched all over the world like that?

Yeah, he's got to be, right? Oh, yeah. You know what? I think this is why it's a quasi-internet thing because you'd have to dial up. And he calls back 1-800-5-55 fear once and it had a busy signal. So maybe Trickster was fucking with someone else at that time. And this is why, like, he's like, I can only handle one user at a time. Jeremy, I'm not trying to be a pain in the butt here. But were you making personal phone calls yesterday? A customer complained about a busy signal.

Now we just can't have that here at Brinscan. Then Jeremy's sitting there and someone calls in and Tricks just like, oh, work to do. And he walks into the computer and then walks out of this kid's television set. Oh, I guarantee you, the second trickster goes into that computer, Jeremy's like, fucking finally. You know what I mean? He's not going to be back for at least 30 minutes. He's taking an extra long lunch today. Yeah, he can kick back, read some people.

fangos he's just got a stack of fangos just mile high so the other thing uh speaking of stack smile high uh edward furlong's a weird creep in this movie oh yeah this is a real our hero ladies and gentlemen this dude is a perv and a half but i think you're supposed to think it's kind of sweet or something like yeah that that's the message i got when i was a kid this is that's why he liked this movie so much that's why i loved it oh hey brain scan's telling me it's cool to do this he is he is spying he's video uh that's videoing really the agree yeah he's well it's all agree with the fact that he's too far that's the line you never cross he is filming the teenage girl across the way uh and this girl's getting naked in like the first scene of

this movie sure and he's just like yeah let's get into it hit record please but here's why the movie like deems it's okay because she's into it that's the that's the trouble spot in this movie yes this girl's supposedly all about being filmed by eddie furlong and it's gross because like it's it's this weird like message that you're sending like dude if you start filming this lady she's gonna find it cute she's gonna like you man that's how you get girls to like you first couple times she's gonna start screaming and pointing at you through the window but if you're just persistent eventually she'll just melt like butter. And then

it's a weird thing where like this chick's a photographer and she's like taking pictures of him filming her. That's bullshit. That's like, oh, everybody's doing it. You can't really point a finger at Edward for a long because she's doing it too. It was like it was 20 years before we were living in a surveillance state. These guys were ahead of the curve.

Growing up, I just thought this was normal. I didn't grow up in a neighborhood. I just thought this was what people did in neighborhoods. Oh man, if you can see a house from your house, you can film people. in it. Yeah, I couldn't do that. I couldn't see a house from my house. Well, this camera's on my property, so I could do what I want. Freedom.

God damn, my freedom is being infringed upon. The one thing about him being a weird hacker is he's got this phone system that's impossible. This fucking computer phone thing. It's a, yeah, it's a computer phone thing where he's never dialing it's all hooked up through his computer,

and he's got some like, somewhat sentient AI called Jeeves or Or, Igor, it's Igor, yeah. It looks like

It's based after the Frankenstein character and like he's like Yes, Master. Yes, Master. And he's like, you know, dial 1,800

555 for you. Yes, master. You hear this yes, monster. Like 38 times in this movie. It's like, I get it, phone system.

Master, are you sure you don't want to have phone sex again tonight? 800 it's usually 900 he's got a computer phone before anyone nobody was giving a fuck about like I think people barely give a shit about Skype right now

and this kid's got it going on in 1990 I think it's four okay yeah so you're filming in 93 right in this movie in like 92 or whatever like I remember the times when you know it was like oh, I can dial a number like through my computer because we have like modems or whatever. But this was,

this movie is way before I was introduced to that. They predicted it all. And the computer could tell who's calling and will show pictures that he's got. Like he's got some like Snapchat situation going on. It's basically the prototype for the iPhone. Yeah, but it's a huge computer. Yeah, it's also a computer you can tell

that he's definitely made because the monitor is like part of a TV. Yeah. And it's just this like big stack that's like clearly just a prop movie computer because it's like a tower but not really. So he's like a computer genius slash horror hound. Great. Yeah, great is right. Yeah, well, he stays in a lot on account of the limp, I guess, is the idea. Oh, like a weird windowy kind of thing. Maybe that's why he's like watching this girl. Yeah, I see Hitchcock taught him it. It's all right. It's all right. She might be murdered if I'm not watching her. I'm protecting her

I'm making sure she's safe at night Now Michael you got to make sure Your neighbor there is safe Safely attractive You see Michael at the time When I was looking out of the window I was protecting a sort of faceless woman From her evil husband

But at the time I also had Grace Kelly by my side You got a Grace Kelly, Michael? No Oh, also a weird thing about this kid He runs like the horror club at school And he's got this principal on his back Well, this horror club, I don't know

I didn't have one at school Where you could just, I went to a Catholic school So that just nixed about any kind of expression You could ever have But like you're just like watching R-rated movies at school I don't think that's it. No.

Yeah, you know what? Probably today with the state of this country Oh wow, yeah. And what, you know, like this Just down the tubes, values down the tubes. Obama America? I mean, it goes on and on. They're watching some like, it appears to be some kind of like Jallo type film maybe. It's, it looks like it's a fake movie. Yeah, they say the title's death, death, death. Yeah, that's too. Yeah, that's probably pretty fake. It sounds like

something in a fango. Yeah. Fango fanfic. Here's the thing about that though. And it's it's laiciness on the screenwriter's part. Like it happens a lot in these movies where we're going to reference like a fake horror movie. The titles are always terrible. Like the title of that horror movie and The Deadpool, whatever that one was. Motel Hotel Satan. Like, fucking come on. Let's think about this just a little bit more.

Well, I could barely hear this movie because it's so high up on a soapbox about most things. It's just like, oh man, these kids are watching the horror movies. Guess what happens next? Yeah, you just guess. They're playing those horror video games. Oh, man. Guess what happens next? Yeah, yeah.

This movie is a real watchdog. like the evils of like the horror community. I guess that's the thing, right? How all-encompassing is this? Horror movies, horror video games, horror magazine publications. This screenwriter is taking the horror community to fucking task. And I think we should mention the screenwriter now. Andrew Kevin Walker, who did seven.

Yep. Right? And other things? Did you 8mm? I believe so, yeah. There you go. He did seven, and he will tell you that he did seven. He won't tell you he did brain scan

I don't know You ever see that movie 7? I wrote it Did he work on Fight Club at all? Maybe I have no idea He might have been the Fincher's guy I'm not sure

But not for a while Now he's all Sorking down I think I just remember that in that In Fight Club There's characters One is Andrew One is Kevin

One is Walker Oh is that right Oh yeah maybe I haven't seen that movie in a while So yeah He's like getting into it with the principal because the principal walks in right as this woman's like

intestines are being pulled out or whatever and this guy's like what is what is that it's a gallbladder oh yeah it's a gallbladder square would you fail biology we can get into fucking Edward Furlong right now that guy's terrible

he's literally one of the worst actors and actually the bullshit is the director blamed him for this movie. He's like, well, it was like, you had that furlong all over my movie, you know what I mean? But no. He's not the reason this movie doesn't

succeed. I mean, he had a pretty good track record at the time, right? I mean, he had to two. When was Pet Cemetery, two? When did Pecker come out? He was in Pecker, right? I feel like Peckers at 99. Yeah, I think that's the late era. And now

he's like, you know, just I don't know what. There was, I I heard rumors that he's obese now, is that true? I don't know about obese, but I was going to say there's that flick, I think it's a you of a bowl movie called Assault on Wall Street with some

dude who I can't remember. I think it maybe was that dude who played the Punisher the second time? Contemporary Punisher. Right, right. More so. Ray Stevenson. Yeah, it might be Ray Stevenson or just a dude who looks like Ray Stevenson. But it's just this movie about like this dude loses everything

and like, you know, the fucking great recession. He goes blast in his way like through this you know that's something hedge fund or whatever yeah it's real edgy uh we're talking about the 2008 recession in a movie that came out like 2013 is he a good guy with a gun or a bad guy with a guy i think he's supposed to be a good guy with a gun in this movie and anyway eddie furlong is his like security guard buddy who like meets up with him at a diner or some shit uh and he's kind of puffy yeah i mean he's starring mostly in domestic assault charges these days that's kind of what i've been noticing but i mean he's just he's

He's not good in Terminator. He's not, he's never, like, it's a whiny thing. And, like, I can see what he kind of represents in 90s culture, like the slacker nerd, whatever. And, like, that's what he's doing here. But he, you also kind of need to act as well. You do kind of need to act, especially if you're in 99% of the scenes in this movie. I mean, and honestly, this is like, this is like Shakespeare. You've got to treat it with a degree of respect.

This is brain scan, God damn it. I'm sure the director told him that numerous times. And Trickster is just filing his nails in the background. Like, is this kid going to blow the scene again? I got this haircut for nothing, apparently. Yeah. Can we just talk about the way this guy looks for a second? Sure, yeah, yeah.

It's like a punk rock Ronald McDonald kind of. Yeah. Like this hairdo is like this red blowout. like it's like a bald guy sort of had a mohawk but not really I don't know and they stretch his mouth a little bit and he's got like weird teeth

he kind of looks like he should be running a foul of Cardassians somewhere in an app his teeth dude he's got Ferrangi teeth he also kind of looks like a New York doll yeah

like a day you put him next to a photo of David Joe Hanson back in the day playing the glam rock he fits right in yeah I think tricks Headline C-Bs a couple times in like 79.

Oh, man, trickster prequel? Give a round of applause for the talking heads. He opened for them a bunch. Yeah, oh yeah. And Jeremy can't fucking hear about it enough. It's like, oh, God, I know. Please just go inside the computer now.

Did you know, I used to know, David Byrne? David Byrne and I got into a real scrap one evening when I made some The inappropriate comments to bassist Dino Waymoove. It was a real problem. But what a great set the heads had all the same. We are just doing Mark Hamill Joker.

Yes. Don't worry about it. Put your fucking email away. I know exactly what I'm doing. I actually don't know what I'm doing. So if you could tell me, that'd be great. So he gets, you know, Jeremy, you know, overnights it. The overnight's Michael Adisk from Brainscan, Inc.

And it's a nice branded envelope, which I appreciate. And it's definitely been, there's thought behind it. It's like a clamshell. It's got brain scan. It's got the logo written all over it. Very nice. Yeah, Trickster did a good job with the graphic design department. Yes, the graphic design department.

Do you mean me? Doing everything around here. Jeremy is so useless. So he gets the disc and he's like, okay, cool. He notices that his lady friend's having a party across the street. Oh, it's a party at her house? Yes. Okay, thank you for clearing that up because I couldn't figure out just where this party was happening.

And it's very clear that this is like a comment on like kid culture. He looks at it and he like looks at it wistfully and he kind of closes the window like, I'm going to shut her in and jerk off for the night. Oh, yeah, we've all been there. Oh, yeah. He actually even tries to call. She tries to call him at one point when he's on brain scan and his busy signal. Because she does kind of have a crush on him, right?

Yeah. And she's an attractive, like, artsy, farty kind of girl. And the signal, the busy signal goes, master is busy. And it's like, oh, yeah, never going to have sex with this kid. Yeah. Got it. That is unsettling. Dude, and it's hilarious, too, because when he's getting ready to settle in for a night with brain scan...

A brain scan sesh, I think you call him. Oh, yes, that's true. Yeah, he says to, um, he says to Igor, he goes, hey, Igor, do not disturb or something like that. Or like, no calls. Oh, that's, Igor, no calls. Yes, Ball Star. And then it's got, like, a little, like, lock and chain sound. Yeah, because why not?

You need to build that into this fake phone system. So he's settling in. And now finally, fucking finally in this movie, we're going to play some brain scan. And it's been advertised as like, it's the scariest, most realistic, blabity blow, horror experience you can ever have on a CD-ROM.

And instead of, like, most horror games at a CD-ROM, when you're looking for a fucking key for two hours, it's, you know, it's this hypnotic experience. into your TV like basically it's the trickster face pops up and like a light shoots out of his eyes and like you have an hour it seems to kill somebody right right you're basically having a seizure the entire time I think that's the idea yeah but it's like ultra realistic virtual reality I guess is right we're getting at what and for the movies purposes that means we cut to a pov yes of you know it's it's eddie furlong you can

tell because he's got his like black chucks on and he's just like, you know, walking through a yard or something and like trickster's narrating everything and he's just like, go to the gate. Go to the gate. Open the gate. The other gate. Oh, we're going to be here all night.

Well, that thing is he goes into a kitchen and he's like, choose your weapon. There's like this decorative red peppers that I kind of wanted him to pick up. Oh, not the red peppers. again really michael the peppers oh i've i've chosen to haunt a real novice you know i opened for the peppers

once but i'm glad you mentioned that sequence because holy toledo there is a just a butcher knife hanging from the ceiling in this kitchen one that is not a safe place to put your cutlery no this is it's one of these things where it's like you know over the stove or whatever where you hang like pots and pans and that's around it, but then it's just like four spoons and a huge knife. If you're just like, well, I wonder which one he's going to select. I hope I don't bump my head on anything. It's so precarious. Or an earthquake that's California.

Oh, right. Yeah, it's riddled with those. So he selects the knife and then it's walk upstairs, Michael. He's also, like, we're doing this like Hamel Joker thing because it's fun. This dude's kind of trying to do a pinhead a little bit. Oh, yeah, it's very pinhead. Especially during this, like, the game narration. Yeah.

And so walk upstairs, Michael. That's right. Now go through the door. Oh, that's right. You're almost there, Michael. The other door, Michael. Oh, God damn it. I keep having to break my scary voice.

It's just like, again, if it was a CD-Rah, I was like, go into the library, Michael. You'll find some interesting notes in there. Be sure to read the index, Michael. It tells you everything you need to know about everything. thing you need to know. Hope you like reading, Michael. Keep scrolling. Check the floor.

You're doing it now, Michael. You're reading. Oh, don't you think those statues could move? Maybe try that for a while. That might open a door or something. Dude, helpful hints from these kind of video games are great, because I always imagine them getting frustrated with the player. So that he's like, do you see, do you see, do you see?

that lonely fat man sleeping do it michael kill him now and whatever he fucking stabs this dude he steps him in the back and then he kind of runs around it breaks up his apartment this it's like a cartoon ate a bunch of hot sauce this guy's like my back and he's like running into bookshelves and tripping over the bed it's a little bit outrageous and uh he's like now you need a trophy don't you michael this is so stupid and he cuts off his foot with the butcher knife like you would cut off a fucking piece of ham from a fucking ham hawk. Dude, just right through it like nothing.

Just through that bone, not even working at it. You know what movie? You want to make this like a real harrowing experience? I need a shot of Eddie Furlong, really just working it. Put his elbow into it. How about working it and it's been like an hour and he isn't cut to it? He's sweating. Oh, Michael. How about an ear

or a nose? Keep it simple. This boy thinks he can cut through a Bone with a butcher knife. One thing I want to talk about because it doesn't make any sense. Sure. The mechanics of the game...

So he kills him and he kind of gets sucked out of the Matrix. Right. The thing is, brain scanner or trickster is like, all right, you've got one hour. And if within one hour, you won't get... If you don't do it within one hour, you'll lose the game and you won't get the next disc. Right.

And the consequences of which, like, usually in any movie ever, you know, when there's rules clearly laid out like, Oh, if you stay on the path. If you go off the path, something bad's going to happen. We usually see that. You know what I mean? You want to see the penalty. Yeah, and that never ever happens.

He always does it just in time. Yeah, what a great thing. This character's succeeding and playing by all the rules of the game. How exciting. He gets sucked back into his thing and he drinks a huge gross glass of milk that's just been sitting there. Let me tell you, there's, like, we just saw this kid caught off a foot from this dead fat guy. but the most disgusting part of this movie is watching Eddie Furlong chug milk because he's like, wow, that was so intense.

Like he still believes it's a game. And he like shoves part of a sandwich in his mouth. And then he's glugging this milk and it's going all over his face, all over his metal t-shirt that he's got on. And it's just, it's disgusting. No one should ever chug dairy products. Go-Gert, whatever. No thank you.

No. Not even a white Russian. You got to sip it. Oh, you got to sip that white Russian. guaranteed. The next day he goes to the girl, is she Kimberly? Is she Kimberly? That I make that? Yes, Kimberly. Okay. He goes to Kimberly's house. He's, you know,

he killed somebody last night. He's feeling pretty good about himself, you know? Is this before? Oh, no, yeah. It is, okay, sorry. Killing people helps your confidence. It's just so people out there. Oh, I just killed a guy last night. Now I'm going to go ask out Kimberly. It's, it's sort of like what do you have to be afraid of anymore?

You already defeated death and became God. Mm-hmm. And while he's waiting for her in her living room, he sees a news report where, oh, my God, that actually, when you die in the game, you die for real. He actually did kill somebody last night. Can we mention briefly Kimberly's parents? Yes.

Oh, man. You know what? I think if he hadn't rang that doorbell, one of the two of them was about to ask for a divorce. Like the dad was just like, you know I? Ding dong. Fuck. He's like reading a gigantic book in this thing.

the most 90s, 90s living room I've ever seen. Oh, absolutely. Oh, it's a Patterson for sure. It's beautiful. Yeah, and he's also, like, the dude gets the, here's why I think they're on the verge of divorce, because they both look at each other like, you're going to get that fucking door or what? Yeah, exactly. And the dad's just like, eh.

It's last straw time. And it's that fucking doorbell again. Yeah. And so, like, he opens this door and it's just like, oh, good. A boy's here who wants to fuck my daughter. Hey, honey, look who's here. Oh, great, teenagers. Oh, it's that creep from across the street, Mr. Camracam.

How's it going, Mr. Camera Cam? And yet, before Kimberly can get downstairs, which is great, because they're like, hey, Kimberly, someone's here to see you. No response. I think she's taking a nap. Like, you don't even see her in this scene. But, yeah, it comes up, like, this dude was actually murdered in the neighborhood, blah, blah, blah.

And, like, Eddie Furlong starts, like, getting the murder sweats, and he's got to get out of there. It's like, tell Kimberly, I'll call her later. Eddie Furlong Gik, gick, gick, gick, gick, yeah. Oh, my God, I killed someone. Oh, my goodness. This is when Trickster comes out of the TV and starts hoo-hying

all over this fucking movie. And he, you know, he looks, it's my favorite secrets of the movie so he comes out. There's a lot about Trickster. I know we're comparing to a lot of things. He's a little Encino man, kind of. There's a little Encino man going on to this movie.

So he picks it out. He's like, what are these CDs? Garbage, garbage, garbage, And he's like, never leave. He's like, oh, I've got something that's really going to blow your mind. He pulls a CD out of his, whatever, out of his coat. And you're like, oh, my God, it's going to be like devil music or like ritual chanting. It's Primus. Yeah, just turns out Trickster's a fan of Primus. Why not? Hey, why not? And he's just dancing around the room. Just like, oh, Primus is fantastic. Didn't you love killing someone last night? You know, I kind of influenced Primus with my early stuff. A couple of my boots made it out to Primus's warehouse.

And what does he say he's like, you gotta like get rid of the trophy or he's like, that's what he was saying to him in the gate, like take a trophy, Michael. You know, and so he goes to the freezer and there's the fucking foot, man. And you know, this is what's great. Is they make it so that this dude has a tattoo on his foot.

Yeah. As if for when we get to this scene, he would open the fridge and just see a tattooless foot. And be like, well, was that the foot I caught off in the game? Or is this a different severed foot? Like, you don't need that tattoo. A foot in the freezer says it all. Stupid detail fucking foot tattoo.

And, you know, that guy does not look like the foot tattooed time. No, he does not. Not in the slightest. Oh, man, what if it's like, what if he was like a hell's angel? And now the fucking angels are coming after this kid, too? That's what I want to see. Suddenly this movie got interested. You get a bunch of angels

Like riding around his house Oh yeah Come on out, kid Oh, Michael, we've killed the wrong man Goodbye He jumps into the TV Game over for me Oh, I'm not fucking with the hell's angels Michael

I'm gonna fuck with a real angel Than a hell's angel Instead of any cool Biker gang mischief He just goes into the woods To bury this foot And this dog starts giving them trouble. Dude, I was wondering, and this is a total brain scan fan theory.

Sure, please. Is this dog also the trickster? Because this appears to be a real knowing pooch. Sure. I don't think so. No, it's just a real mischievous pop. Yeah. Okay.

It's a mischievous pop. I think it's just supposed to be like, oh, what's that? It's the worst thing could happen when you're trying to bury meat or whatever. Oh, the dog. Jerry Lee comes out of the woodwork and just runs away with it. The more fantastical thing than the dog here is the owner. He's like a fat guy in a track suit who's like, can't see anything. Like Edward Furlong is laying in the ditch with a severed foot.

His dog is on top of him. And he's like, oh, that's nothing over there. Come on. I was like, where is this dude's sunglasses? because he's clearly blind. Like, what is, how does he not see this little turd laying on the ground three feet in front of him? It just doesn't make sense. It just doesn't add up.

And at this point, he's really freaking out. So he starts staying home from school, right? And his buddy, Kyle, is like, hey, man, you're done with brain scan yet? Can I play brain scan? Hey, can I play brain scan? Bro, I want to borrow your brain scan. And trick's just like, there's a witness. Oh, so you have seen.

You weren't as good as you thought you were, Michael, even though you were brilliant. And he's all jerking off about how he... He just killed one dude. It's not that great. Yeah, whatever. This dude was, like, alone in the house. Yeah. I'm real impressed.

Way to overdo it with the praise trickster. He doesn't even have a theme or a motif. He just took the foot for what reason. I don't know. Yeah. He should have cut his kneecap off or something. Yeah, sure. Because I don't have one, carve.

Oh, yeah. Right. Yeah. And Trickster's like, you got to play level two or else you're going to go to jail, right? And like, I'm going to send you, all right. By the way, ignore my name for this portion. I'm totally honest with you. He keeps getting fucking scammed by a guy named Trickster.

Day in and day out. He's like, Trickster. He always has this thing where it's like, I'm going to go to the cops. And he's like, oh, that's fine, Michael. But you know. due to the nature of this agreement what with me coming out of your television and all

I don't think it's going to fly and he's like all right and he thinks he's going to be smooth here the second time like when he plays round two he starts filming himself and I was like wow way to turn the camera on you kid instead of this poor girl across the street

and he's like hi my name's Michael I'm 16 years old and I'm scared it's the funny fucking thing. But it's also like the bullshit is they change like in the, when the first time happens, you go to a POV shot. You think that's what brain scan is. Every

time he does it, he's going to go in. It's going to be POV. That way we know we're playing brain scan and not doing whatever. Exactly. He just blacks out. Yep. And you don't know what happens. And he just wakes up like seconds later like, wow. Oh, that was crazy. Let's check the videotape. And it's like

he has the seizure and then he gets up and walks away. And And, like, so he's freaking out. And I was like, why couldn't we see this? Yes, yes. Like, what are you trying to keep secret? It's not that he murdered his friend. It's never like, did he actually do it?

Because seconds later, they're like, so, um, Kyle was murdered last night. And you're like, all right. Well, yeah, I know. Why couldn't I see that? Is it a fucking deleted scene? Like, yeah, maybe. I mean, keep the logistics of how I'm going to look at your dumb VR game the same. For sure.

And yeah, I want to see, this is a movie without a huge body count. And it's, I would like to see that little turd with, you know, because the funny thing is, like, he's so his best friend. Like, every time he, like, hangs up the foe with him, he's like, buddies forever. It's so weird. Best buds for life, right? You're never going to kill me, right, Michael? Michael, come on, say it. I'm not going to hang up until you say it.

Michael, say it. Best buddies forever, right? Best buddies. And now, hello? The video of him getting up out of the chair. confirms, yes, I am going out and murdering people whenever I play this game. It's not a game. I'm not watching the TV.

Right. You're killing the game. You kill for real. Yeah. And you know what, dude, fool me once, trickster. Shame on you. Fool me twice, trickster. Shame the fuck on me.

Exactly right. I think because of the trickster, this kid has gone on the house more, like way more. He's actually doing him a favor. Dude, he's only going to school and then coming home. And with the help of trickster, he's getting out there. He's meeting new people. A little fresh air. Yeah.

Some exercise, just sawn off that foot. Yeah. Well, the weird thing is his trophy the second time isn't his friend's foot. Because I guess he doesn't have a foot fetish. They should be go all feet or no feet. Yes, exactly. Or at least keep it within the realm of cutting off body parts. Yes.

Not just his dumb like arrowhead necklace or whatever it is. Right, yeah, his lucky charm. But he, you know what he does keep consistent? putting that shit in the freezer for whatever reason because he opens the freezer back up he's like boy i hope it's not another foot terminator and it's just this necklace and he's like oh no that necklace it has blood on it yes it does have blood on it so we could clone kyle for best buds forever maybe i don't know maybe trickster can help me clone my dead best buddy whatever so he's pretty peeved that uh the trickster and he's like oh you tricked me trickster Kyle didn't witness

anything. And he's like, well, he knew about Brainscad. He read that Fango didn't he? But then it's like, I'm calling some bullshit on your logic here, Trickster, because you put that ad in Fango somewhere towards the back. But so what? You're just going to go

around eliminating all the people that read the ad? This is just the trick, right? He wants to fuck with Michael to that degree. Like, there's no reason Kyle had to die. Yeah, he just wanted him to go. I had my fingers crossed that he was going to go.

Just being honest about it. This is the saddest and scariest part of the movie. Oh, really? Is Edward Furlong's only friend now is Trickster. Yeah. Oh, yeah. What? Sorry, I just

I just say this social circle is pretty small. Yeah. And his dad's too busy slinging Coke in Mexico. So we can't, he's not coming back anytime soon. Yeah, like whatever. You know what I think it might be? I think he's with David Morse and the Good Son over in Tokyo doing whatever that deal was?

Oh, right, yeah. Shady business. Yeah, some shady shit, dude. I think that's what's happening. Michael, I can't. It's going to be a few more days. The Yakuza has demanded another meeting. So enter in the father figure of this movie.

A snoozing on cruise control, Frank Langela. Wow. Frank Langela is one of those actors where I'm like, Frank Langela is great and everything. And then I watch Franklin Jell is great and everything. in most things, and I'm like, oh, he's just tired again. He's got

his days, and he's got his days. Yeah, and so he's playing Detective Rip Van Winkle. Well, he keeps like, he keeps bumping into Michael, like, the first thing I think is an auto rack, and he's like, get out of here, kid, go play, go play

your video games. That was a confusing thing, because it's like Eddie Furlong's coming home and he's got like a little scooter, and I was like, oh, look, he's on a motorcycle. Yeah, another dirty dirt bike. But no, he just pulls up And it's like this murder scene

And they're like getting a body into a bag And I was like Is this related to the thing? No, this is just a random death In this neighborhood Okay Then the next time he goes to the fat guy's house And he's like, fool me twice kid

You know, he's just like there again I told you to scram last time kid Didn't I see you at this town's last brutal murder And then what's her name Kimberly comes by because she's so in love with this fucking creep

that's been taping her one of the creepiest scenes is like him trying to call her and he's watching video of her while he's trying to call her yes you oh you never did that dude and it's it's even

weirder because he times it just so so when like she picks up the phone he's like Igor hang up yeah small stuff and um she can hear yes math i mean you know who it was yeah it's yeah this is creeps it's either it's either it's either michael or kyle called her one of the other and you know she comes over with all

the school books because he stopped going at school because he's all upset about murdering a lot of people and Kimberly's like hey i got all your assignments and he's like wow that's that's really great oh man uh um you should go yeah and here's the Well, she also has a slip, like a piece of paper that a petition that Kyle was getting together to bring back the horror club. You're going to feel like a real heel when that happens. Yeah, his friend that he just murdered. And at the bottom, this is, this is where you know Kyle's a real loser. At the bottom of the petition, Kyle had written Best Buds Forever.

But he also called her and was like, I think he's mad at me. I don't know what's going on. It was weird. Because also the thing we didn't mention was like, Kyle comes over. He's like, let me play brain scan best, bud. And he's like, get away. I've got mono. And like they kind of have a fight or whatever.

And he like kicks him out the house. So yeah, she's like, yeah, Kyle called me. It was weird because we've never spoken on the phone before. But he said you guys had a fight. And here's the petition to bring back the horror club. Speaking of the horror club, I just want to, I just remembered a great part of this movie, fantastic, one of my favorite moments. Please. That was

with the principal yelling at him about the horror club. Do you remember some of this dialogue that's like, what is it with these horror movies? Is it like lighting a marijuana cigarette and saying goodbye to the worlds? Oh, and then it's like, so it's better? Getting an

erection and raping somebody. No, watching pornography, getting an erection and going out and raping somebody. You're a school administrator. The connections that this principle's making. Holy Toledo. You know what? You want to poo-poo marijuana cigarettes? That's fine. You want to poop-pornography. That's fine. Don't poo-poo erections. Dude, leave

boners out of me, okay? Come on. But you're, you bring a student into your office and you're talking about erections and raping people. Even Edward Furlong's like, the erection didn't rape the woman and the dude did. Wait, what? Get him, Terminator. That made no sense. It's like, what did the principal just talk to you about there? I don't know, like boners and joints and rape.

It was really weird. He was yelling a lot. And then the Terminator grabs this principal. It was not the bono. The bono did not pull that job. It was the man. Also, like, yeah, like, yeah, he's going to lose your job. You say the word erection to a student.

Yep. Like, unless you're repeating. Unless you're in the sex ed class. If you're the sex ed teacher, you can't just be talking about hard dicks without context. No, absolutely. Within a minute, you talk about marijuana, rape, erections, pornography to a student? No, you're out on your ass.

No, exactly. I'm glad we got, I'm glad we just got that covered. Yes. And speaking of erections, he's got one now because she's like, so I could hang out and we could like, you know, hang out. And he's like, oh, man, there's another brain scan disc. You got to get out of here, girl. Yeah, she's like, are you sure? Because, like, the train's leaving the station.

And he kicks around like, oh, God, I can't believe I'm doing this joke. Yeah, get out of my house. To be fair, though, the last thing you want to do is finally be able to hook up with your long-lost unrequited love. Uh-huh. And then Trickster shows up. Oh, yeah, Michael, that's the stuff. No, the other one, Michael. You know what I'm talking about.

You've got less than an hour, Michael. Come on. You've got time, teenage boy. But at the same time, take that risk, and I'll tell you why. Because you might be going down for a double homicide. Yeah, exactly, dude, exactly. And the other thing is, it's not like he put disc three in. Yeah, that's true.

And the H's O, like, he's got to insert this horror disc into his CD. Rom. Well, the thing is, like, trickster at some point just starts hanging out in his house. Just eating his fucking groceries. That's when he starts at Sino Manning, because he's like, eating like raw chicken and, like... That's the moment I thought of dropped dead friend.

The trickster's got the munchies, and he's just eating, he's like, yeah, he's just munching on this raw chicken. And this actor is doing a terrible job of pretending he's eating a raw chicken. He's like, kind of just, like, putting his face up to it and not biting or anything.

and he's got like hot dogs and bananas and all sorts of shit he's putting mustard on it it's like a scene from hook he is disgusting he does belong in that version of Netherland with its haircut

dude I think him and Rufio have the same haircut they might oh you don't even remember anymore Peter I'm going to go form a crooked video game company and I'll show you

who can really fly bad so so he kicks this girl out possibly to never lose his virginity ever and this is when he's like all right trickster

I'm gonna play the game one more time man and you better not play any tricks on me and this is this is the most disgusting thing because he's like uh you know he's like I'm not gonna do it blah blah blah

blah and like the trickster cuts Eddie Furlong's hand open and the blah falls onto a like stack of magazines or something and then the blood like swirls around and makes a CD now here's the thing trickster if you can do that why are we using the postal service because when he sees the the third disc he like smashes it yes like he kicks Kimberly out and he smashes it and whatever and he's like oh thought you destroyed my CD ROM huh he's running around the office Jeremy did you get a delivery confirmation on

I told you to shout out for the insurance and tracking ability. What are you doing? Trying to rent a fucking business, Jeremy. A fucking child could do it. I got a whale here. We're on disc three. I've never gotten to disc three. The Koreans always throw it out after two.

It's kind of a big deal. No one's ever been dumb enough to get to desk three. Jeremy, you keep talking about wanting a christmas. party. The only way we're going to get to Christmas here at Brain Scan LTD is if you buck up and get him to play disc three. How could there

be no fucking tracking? You want that bonus at Christmas Jeremy? Buck up. I swear to God your desk is an absolute train wreck. This is disgusting. Those Doritos are from yesterday, Jeremy. Now let me eat my raw

chicken in peace. On Primus. So he starts playing this game. He does. Well, the funny thing is, I don't know what, there's a separate movie going on where a werewolf is on loose because we cut, we cut to,

it's Franklin Jell and he's like, all right, neighborhood watch, here we go. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Let's break into teams, we're going to, they're looking for, I don't know what they're even looking for. Because they believe that like a killer is just running. running around the town, much like a werewolf.

Exactly. That's not how killers work. They don't, like, stalk around the town like killers. They look a lot like people until they murder people. And he gives this big speech about, like, anyone out there with firearms, I catch you, whether or not you use them, I'm going to take it away from you and arrest you. It's the best thing. I was like, I'm going to take your Game Boy from you and put it in my drawer.

You can get it at the end of the year. Do you, but do you think he was hunting monsters before? Before he went to this new beat. Oh, if Franklin Gellal like monster hunter. Maybe he was part of like Hellboy's team. It could have been. Why not? I just don't know what the purpose of this hunt is.

Like you get these fucking these small towners who've lost two people. A kid is dead now. Now we're in. That's when they all become worry warts. And they're like, we got a, I'm staying out on my porch all night to make sure they're no killers coming by. You know what? you know what a good idea is? Let me mobilize these people. Let me get them, let me get them good and drunk and get them on the streets. Exactly. It's the monsters are due on fucking Maple Street, dude. And let's give all these hicks, a heightened sense of importance to get out there and kill this killer.

Maybe Frank Angel is like, oh, a lot of victims on the streets, it'll draw them out. I don't understand what he's even trying to do. And as far as we know, like, he's not the paranormal police. He's just a detect. Yeah, so as far as we know. As far as we know. But so if you're not a licensed werewolf hunter, how are you getting the approval of like the town police department? No. To deputize these people. Why not just have more, you know, get some two more squad cars just going around?

Yeah, where are the actual cops? If you're a detective, that means there's other police in this town. Bring in the stateies. Yeah, yeah. Go to the state police if you need to. Shit, bring in the FBI if you think it's getting that. serious not these fucking you know

weekend couch quarterbacks and it goes terribly oh yes it sure does so uh brain trickster is like what there's one there's evidence at Kyle's house you really botched it last night

too bad we didn't see it um you gotta get over there and fix it so he's like all right you've got only 30 minutes for this disc do you see how this game's getting harder Michael now there's only 30 minutes so he puts it

He puts the disc in. And again, like, brain scan happens. Every time we do, like, a weird slide beginning of Fight Club vortex. It is the slider slide graphic just made to look blood red. And now we're just watching Eddie Furlong do stuff. Yeah, total, like, third person camera. It's just, like, just any old scene in the movie. And he's totally aware of his action.

So it's not even like he's in a brain scan trance anymore. Like, why even put the disc in to do this? Exactly. It makes no sense. He's like, all right, I put the CD-ROM in. Igor, keep things all right here. I have to go out now. I'm going to grab my coat. I'm going to walk out of the door. At least the first two times you know that he's in some sort of weird, like, demonic trance. And he's not responsible for his actions at least a little bit. But now he's just like literally like puts a disc in it. Yeah. And the mission is he's got to go. Now you're just wasting electricity, really. You're leaving the fucking TV on. Run in that computer. There's only so much e-star conservation I can do. You have to turn this off when you leave.

Master, Con Edison is calling Khan Edison. Do not disturb you, Igor. I've been ducking them for weeks. Also, now I'm glad I'm giving myself a time limit. Bye. Why give yourself an artificial? Just do things. So the whole thing is he's got to go over to Kyle's house because apparently he killed. him at his house. We don't see it. We don't know how Kyle died, but he stomped through a rose

garden and the footprints, he's worried they'll be able to tell that it's a person who has a limp and Eddie Furlong's got the limp. So he's got to go over there and just dust off the dirt or whatever, level it out. But it's already been marked. The pictures are there. Like, there's nothing you could do it. Too late. Yeah, definitely too late. They're not going to bring that soil into the courtroom and be like, there it is. Yeah, they already took pictures of it. Yes. Like, if you had to duck under the police tape they already took pictures of it so he goes to do this and like frank langella's uh like he's got a detective partner yep who is a real just nothing character he's not even dressed like a police detective i think the only real line is when frank lindella

yells at him for driving too slow oh yeah that's that's the moment in this movie where they try to like make them like characterize them as partners he's like banter yeah he's like what do you standing on that side of the car for and Langella's like, because I'm sick and tired are you driving 20 miles an hour or whatever? And I'm like, I don't give a shit about any of this. No, it's too little too late. So that dude's over there just by

himself in the dark, dusting for Prince, just totally alone. Well, the whole town goes mad. Well, we're on the mad, the mad monster hunt. Langella's like handling that part of the operation. He hears furlong, he's like, oh, I better go out on the streets and catch this kid. Right. I'm an

authorized police office. There's also A moment when right, you know, it was soon after Kyle got murdered that Edward Furlong calls Kyle. Oh, right. Yeah. And he's like, Kyle, oh yeah. Like, Langella picks up the phone and doesn't say anything. And he's just like, Kyle, pick up the phone. Please be alive. Please be okay. And he's like, who is this? Answer me now. I have you here. Please answer. And he just hangs up on him. So by the way, we should mention that like Langella is really. pretty sure that Eddie Furlong's doing the killing. Right. And he eventually does get like handed some paper. It's like, turns out that kid did make the

call. Oh, because at one point like he and he burns, uh, some clothes in the fire and they find some, some blood from that dude on it. He's he's well fucked at this point. Exactly right. And he's like, oh, now he's on the run from because the cop starts chasing him. So he goes out to the streets. And luckily there's teams and teams and teams. Yeah. Um, of, the teams and teams of Neighborhood Watch dudes.

And he gets, it's this fucking perverted Principles' wet dream because he bumps into him and he's like, oh, now I've got your Michael. Oh, now it's Bobby Boner. Hello, Bobby Bono. You got a jazz cigarette on you, porno addict.

Out raping, I see. And he's like, you know, he's gravity. He's like, I got him. And he's like on the walkie talkie. You're like, I got him. And he slips out. And it's like an action figure commercial. Remember how that he's.

So basically he slips out And he causes a bunch of bricks To fall on this dude It's like when you're trying to advertise in the commercial Like the play set And it's like you know You can go to this area You can go to this one

Look out for the bricks falling It's like a play set of a construction site Which I don't know I wouldn't have any interest of that as a child But yeah so this dude's crushed to death Yep It's pretty good You don't get to see like the aftermath too much

You just see a bunch of bricks on the body He's laying there with like some dust on his face I think is the most you get but you're like wow what a disaster frank langela it sure can't get any worse for you then like the partner's like hey i've been chasing that kid and then like this dude turns around with this shotgun and the cop draws his firearm like what the fuck are you doing and this neighborhood watch guy blows this partner away shoots him dead and there's a bunch of them standing there with like hand their hat in their hands like oh gee gosh we're sorry mr lange And he's like, does somebody want to explain to me what the hell happened here? Oh, my God. The best part is then Michael sees his window to escape into chaos. He's like, yo, got to get out of here.

So he's walking away. And then just some fat local cop with a mustache grabs and he's like, hey, kid, what are you doing? What are you doing? They just shot the killer over there. Go on home. It's amazing. And also. My buddy Rex just shot the killer.

In keeping with Frank Langela's refusal to get other police officers in. involved. That dude isn't a cop because on his arm it clearly just says security guard. Yeah. So it's like we'll get uniformed Paul Blartz out here, but we refuse to call any other police offices. Do you think that guy was just part of the neighborhood

watch and he was just like, well, I am a security guard, I might as well wear my uniform. Guaranteed he was like, honey, there's a reason to wear this outside the mall. Great. I'll be in watching Wheel of Fortune. Have fun with your neighborhood watch. He's got this brain skin. DVD. You go on.

Or CD, I apologize. What's a DVD? It's a learning computer. The other line that Langella has is great. He goes, which one of you's going to go tell his wife? Not that. Which one of you is going to get the chair for killing this

guy? Exactly right. And also which one of you is going to let Frank Langella stay at your house when he gets fired and loses everything for this totally insane operation. I hope you don't mind. I've been washing my socks in your sink.

Till I get back on my feet. Kind of lost it all there. Wow, this is rock bottom. You know, when I assembled the neighborhood watch, I didn't know I'd spend the rest of my days watching the neighborhood just from the couch

here. Oh, I thought, well, hold on, leave the body out. He's going to burn up in the sunlight like a vampire. Oh, wait, he didn't. Now I'm well, fuck. Well, that was sort of my last hope. He was actually a vampire. And I'd be vindicated. Nope.

Got some washing my socks here. It's now on. Could you let me know what your shower schedule is? Because I get up pretty early. Mind giving me a little more room in that freezer? Somewhere to put my lean cuisines. I really appreciate this. It's only going to be another few weeks. I promise. I promise.

Heard word of a werewolf, two towns over. Might have a gig coming up pretty soon. No, I haven't been drinking in the afternoon. Why do you ask? You know, I just don't see why I have to shave every day now. Well, those were your wife's underwear. They smelled good. Don't worry. What?

Oh, yesterday when I said I had a job interview, you just watched me go into the garden and drink. I thought you would, you thought you had. work of your own. I thought those dishes being done was a sign of me trying to pull my own weight. I guess I was wrong. You know, you could view that as a compliment there. I was admiring the garden.

It was very, very beautiful. So we have level four now. This is the final level of brain scan. Nobody's gotten this far. Okay, Jeremy. You better ship it today, two day, because it's Thursday, which means it'll get there on Monday. Because it's not going to I'm not paying for Saturday delivery, Jeremy.

What's that? What? Jeremy? No, it's not my job to look at the calendar. How could you not have known it was Columbus Day? There's no mail. There's no mail, Jeremy. There's no mail. We're at level four here.

We've never been to level four before. Fucking Tuesday now. Tuesday. Michael, why don't you play a different game today? Here you go. Road rash. You can thank Jeremy. Well, yes, you could obviously go kill someone without the game, but it's the point.

Can't you see the murder in part Isn't over yet Save it for brains can I'm really sorry Michael I really am I'm sick over the whole thing Fucking Columbus Day Some calendars have it

Some don't I don't know why you'd want to worship A genocidal Italian anyway It's a stupid reason to close the post office Do you think that Christopher Columbus brain scanned Like Trickster was there Oh yeah absolutely All you have to do Christopher

Give them these blankets They'll take care of the rest Oppressed the whole island So he's like The last thing you got to do is kill Kim Because of course you got to kill Kim Well she sees him come in The night before after he murders his

principal. Right, right. And so she's all like, hey, you want to come inside an experiment? And he's like, now I got to go home and play more brain scan. I want to play body scan with you, but I got to play brain scan with stupid tricksters ruining my life. Okay. Way to kill my social circle, trickster. Who are you talking to? Shut up, Kimberly. So he only has, he has to put the disc in. Why are we still fucking around? At this point, you know what's on that CD-ROM? A timer. It's just you put the disc in and the timer comes up and it says 15 minutes.

So he runs over to Kimberly's house. The weird thing is he's like, you better kill Kimberly. He's like, I can't. I love her, which ew gross. Yep, you don't love her, you weird ass. Geez, you'd give you kudies if you loved her. You don't want that, right, Steve? Yes.

No. I mean, it's, cooties are. The reason, the reason, no. The reason. not to kill someone shouldn't be but I love her man it should be like oh no that's wrong it's a person and I shouldn't kill

anybody well he had no parents at all so he had no free no one taught him a frame of reference for right or wrong broken home yeah makes him quick prey for a demonic glam rocker from the computer that's why when someone says ASL you say

no thanks buddy and you take a walk yeah you do It's internet safety. Don't go surfing without a buddy. Yeah. So he goes to her house. And of course, by the way, we should bring up at this point,

every kid's room in this movie has an Aerosmith poster. The same Aerosmith poster. That's how you know this is a fucking fantasy world. How many kids were in love with Aerosmith? 94, man. It's not in 1978. And it's all from that album that Eddie Furlongs in the video from one of the songs. You're just like, who?

Do you think that's why it's up there? Yeah, because they're buds. They're best buds for her. You got to, hey man, I'll do this movie, but you need that Aerosmith up there. I told Stephen Tyler the next movie I'm in, Aerosmith posters are going to be everywhere. Well, Aerosmith was involved in Terminator 2 as well. Were they? Was there a song on the soundtrack?

I believe so. They don't make an appearance, too. No, no. Oh, my God, that turned out. I have to go to this Aerosmith concert. Wow, they are really walking out now. I don't know. Stephen Tyler looks a little subdued.

you may be the T-1000. I'm analyzing the crowd for boners. There's a boner. There's a boner. Oh, that's not a boner. Oh, you know what? I don't think that they were involved. They might not have been involved in Terminator,

but now they're mixed up. Remember that Aerosmith video game that happened? Yes, that was sort of much like that Terminator 2 video games. Yes, that's me across the memory stream. where the controller was like a fucking automatic weapon. Right, yeah. I think the Aerosmith game was sort of similar

for some reason. Yeah, I remember what you're talking about. Yeah. But anyway, yeah, there's Aerosmith posters all over this movie. His room, Kimberly's room. I think the principal's office had a couple. And so he goes,

and this is what's kind of weird. It's like, you don't want a killer, but you go over there anyway. What does he, what does the tricksters say to him? Well, he picks up, I think he does want to kill.

He's like, I don't know, man. I don't want to go to jail. Oh, my God, I'm going to kill her. Oh, my God, I'm going to kill her. Oh, my God, I'm going to kill her. I think brain scan, like, goes into your subconscious a bit. So I think it's forcing him to. Oh, he's like a little pre-programmed.

Yeah, a little bit. Yeah. So, yeah, now, that's the final act. And he goes into her room and she's sleeping. The way that, this movie's very exploitative of this girl, by the way. Oh, 100%. This camera loves her. Before he even goes over to the house, like, he's back across the street arguing with

trickster about whatever it cuts to this chick and it's like thighs up to her open pajama shirt and you can see her bra and i was like what's going on and she's just asleep and then it cuts back to like shut up trickster fine i'll do it and he goes over well he's kind of mad at her for some weird reason like she works for the school paper or something yes she when she came over the first time she like used some pull quotes because like he was kyle's best friend. He's like, how could you do this to me, Kimberly? And she's like, um, you've been filming me for years without my consent. It's like, yeah, but that's okay. And this is not because this is a invasion of privacy. That's for me jerking off. I'm not putting it in a school

paper, Kimberly. And she apologizes, I'm sorry. She blames a friend. Like another friend used the quote. Who I'd like to call deleted scene Stacy, because she comes up later in the movie and it's like, Stacy made me do it. And I'm like, who? Like, definitely there's a lot, there's a Stacey C plot that you don't get to see. I think there's a brain scan director's cut somewhere. I would love to see it. All sorts of missing levels. So he goes over there and he's, because I think he's a little pissed about that.

And he's like, but I'm also a creep. Yeah. And also this is, this is kind of what happens when you don't call the police on your stalker. By the way, like, you know what I mean? Yeah. It's kind of your response. They'll be standing in your bedroom with a butcher knife eventually. Yeah.

Yeah. It's your responsibility as the stalky. once you find out to put a stop to that shit. Right. So anyone listening, I know what's going on. You know who you are. So he's just kind of like watching her for a bit, not doing anything. And then he's sleeping.

But then this is when we find out because the rules of this movie are not set. The trickster can just like bop over to this chick's house too for some reason. He boop boop boops out. He boop boop boopped over there. And it's not even like He has to It's not even like he needs The brain scan TV or any kind of TV

Like no He's just transported Like he's got a Oh now Kimberly doesn't have a CD-ROM Jeremy that was supposed To be delivered last week We knew the final stage

We'd be taking place In Tiffany's bedroom Jeremy I can't go into the bedroom We were going to use the AOL Free 100 Hours program Remember we were stealing that whole idea It'd be great if it's like the pinhead cube or whatever. The Hellraiser Cube.

It's a CD for him. Promotional CDs, Jeremy. I had 100,000 pressed. Your first 100 hours of brain scanner free. Jeremy, let me ask you this. It's a serious question now. How many people in the world do you think can resist 100 free hours of America online?

The answer, Jeremy, is none. That's why it's a foolproof plan. Also, Jeremy, do you really think you have a future in logistics, honestly. Let's really man to man here. I'm not talking to you as your boss, the trickster. I'm talking to you as your best friend in career advisor, trickster.

So he's just there somehow. And he starts, like, he-horn all through this bedroom. Yeah. And she, like, doesn't really wake up. He's, like, screaming and yelling at him. Like, you got to do it, whatever. And he's like, no, I don't trickster. And I'm

like, is this? I think you're tricking me again into killing her man i don't know how but i think this is going to blow up in my face and i'm like what pills did this girl take because she's out cold through this screaming match and then the trickster eats him oh well they start to like merge like much like time cop yeah there's some time cop and he stabs him in the uh furlong stabs him in the stomach and then like his stomach starts to eat his hand a little bit right because i think his mind is finally recognizing oh trickster is just my Tyler Durdin. And I'm just a crazy piece of shit.

And now I'm becoming both. And then, yeah, there's great. And, you know, for early, for early, like, CG and all that, like, it's a pretty nice effect of him munching down on some Eddie's Furlong. He's chowing down on the Furlong buffet. But the thing about it is, like, I thought for a second, we were watching a horror movie.

Like, how about some, like, Kruger-esque special effects of like this dude just eating this child. Like how cool would that be? Yeah, they do a little bit of that. Like he he pokes his eyes out and green goo pops out. But instead of like the fingers going away and the trickster's got like empty eye sockets, it's just this actor with like a little green tear stain here and there. Honestly, he's got you got the R rating.

Let's go for it. Totally. I mean, you don't just need the R rating for your weird. boob shots for no reason but then so this is my favorite part of the movie so he's eating him and she wakes up and is like what in the ever loving fuck and then like he gobbles him up he takes the last bite of furlong good to the last drop and it cuts to this shot of Eddie Furlong inside him like what like fantastic voyage or some shit there's a shot of his eye and you see like Eddie for like falling through his eye and then he's like inside his body yeah and then so like she sits

up like Michael what's going on and he sits up it's furlong again and he's got like sort of the trickster makeup like on one side of his face right a lot of rouge and like these like pale green eyes with the trick like that are unnatural because the trickster does have that right and so it's this thing where like and now we just get into like the biggest bunch of like her bartering for her life because she's like, don't kill me, Michael, because I don't know, I love you, I love you an awful lot, I've always loved you. What else do you? I have some, you know, I could buy you

some video games. We got plenty of warm milk if you want to drink that. I got Nightmare 1 through 9. We can watch that. Stack of unred fangoes. My dad can come in here for a while, pretend to be your dad. I don't know. I don't know what you need, Michael. But also, yeah, this is what she reveals. Like, she's like, he's like, you're just bartering for your life, bitch.

And she's like, no, no, I'm not. And she breaks out this, like, real of him. She's been filming him too, which is total fucking bullshit. No, wasn't she taking pictures? Yes, she was. And, like, you know what, man? All you're doing is empowering perverts with this thing. Oh, absolutely.

She's pervert power. She's so into it. She's taken. Look, I know you feel really bad about yourself, Eddie, for filming your next door neighbor but honestly chances are she's probably filming you too that shit goes both ways you're a good looking guy

kind of just don't grow up to be fat oh and so then you're like okay like here it comes he's just going to do it and then the door opens and there's Frank Langella

and you're like he wins he beats him he like he's like no trickster I'm not going to do it and trickster's like no you one and he pops out of him and he opens the door he's like oh I've got one more surprise before door number three

right and it's Langella and he's just like oh hello there remember I was in this film sorry I was out hunting werewolves earlier your father said I could stay in here for tonight I'll put up a little cots I do have to use that bathroom at seven in the morning you won't even know I'm here

you won't I promise you that you won't even know I got my ties drying in the sink if you could just, you know, if you have to brush your teeth, just put them on the railing for a while. Kimberly, if you don't mind, could I get one dresser drawer for my you know, my

dress shirts? I hope you don't mind the smell, Kimberly. I'm about to heat up this bread with a lighter. Call it derelict toast. It's pretty good. I open up two packets of sweeten low and put it on top. It's almost like a donut. Can you believe

I played Skeletor and this is the worst movie I've ever been in? Dude, Masters of the Universe is a better movie than this. Easily. What? I think so. No. Really? I say this is better than Frost Nixon. And, you know, he opens the door.

It's great because he only just says, Murderer and shoots this kid in the heart four times. He's already got his gun drop. Murderer. It's so awesome. There's no way you could have subdued Eddie Furlong without using lethal force. Yeah, totally. I see Eddie

Furlong with the thing of scissors. I'm like, I got it. Don't worry. No, no. You can just sit over here, Lucille. I got it. You just play keep away. You play keep away with those scissors. Give him a wedge. And so once he's shot through the heart

and Langella's to blame, he gave love a bad name. Thank you. We were all thinking it. I know. This is a metal movie, bro. You got to use your medals. Totally. So Furlong then wakes up in the chair. And then, oh, wait a minute.

There's the sandwich. Wait, and that's the milk. That's the very same glass of milky chugged. And he's also wearing like red because he was wearing red in the beginning, but he wears gray throughout the rest of the movie. Right. So it's like very clearly like, yeah. This is a flashback?

No. It just didn't have. happen and I'm sitting there like oh that's a big F you movie Are you kidding me? He opens the window and the parties are still going on Hey what day is it man It's Christmas Day

Murdering I can do it all I could do it all I could The spirits didn't take me to hell man I have time now He runs down to this little pool party and it's he's on the set I can't hardly wait.

Wait, before we get there, it's a very, we're on our soapbox. He's like, I know what did all this, this stupid rat computer man. Oh, dude, he starts to ration this room apart. Master, no, it wasn't me, master. I've gained sent to you. I have feelings. You've taken out Skynet. I would like to award you this metal.

There's only one more. there's one last chip inside me you have to lower me into Kimberly's pool thumbs up Kimberly I order you not to go I order you not to go

Cannonball that shorts out of circuits and he's dead yeah so he trashed his room because computers really this online culture that we're cultivating is what's going to be the death of us all

but also though he's like ripping down like horror movie posters It's just like, it's his whole, everything he loves, he's like, no, it's wrong. Time to go to church. And he's just ripping this room to shreds. And, yeah, he goes to the pool party. Yeah.

Well, because Kyle's at the front door, like, there's a pool party, bro. I'm 37 years old. And he's like, Kyle, it's you. And he's like, no, it's Axel Rose because it's 1994, brother. I missed you. I love you, Kyle. I love you. Best Buds for Life.

And it's like, and that, see, and now Kyle's off put by him. Yes. It's like, were you all right? What's going, like, he's supposed to be the one that's all gushy. Tiny Tim, you're alive. And he goes over and deleted scenes Stacey is just hanging out. They're like, hey, Stacey. And she's like, yep, this is totally not my first scene in the movie.

But this is, this is a really useless. piece of shit moment in this movie because Eddie Furlong's like come on camera don't you want to come upstairs and finish the movie with me no you're going to stay here okay and Kyle's like oh you're deleted scene Stacy

what's up I'm deleted death Kyle and he's just like that outfit's pretty bitchin and she's like the sarcastic chick and she's just like are you bullshitting or whatever and he's like no

it's totally bitch you'd want to sit here for a minute and I was like can the camera please go upstairs whenever you're ready brain scan I'm putting my coat on and he does and like I guess she was like hooking up with some jock that was aforementioned like rumored to be looking up with the job and like he's like throwing up in your bedroom or something right I thought it was like another female friend was like throwing up in the sink or something and she's like oh you know and she's like oh my god Edward furlong you totally came to my party uninvited awesome yeah and you realized like not only was like the whole movie alive but like their like her crush on him was like a product of his imagination also because she's so much colder to him she it's weird though she listen this is like she hates his fucking gut she can't stand this kid because he immediately asks like why don't we go out sometimes like on a date or whatever and she's like what oh no no no and then he's like crashed and she's like oh god this kid's got a fucking bitch cry in my bedroom

okay maybe let me think about it and he said oh my god you're gonna think about it dude he goes not no maybe that's the saddest shit in this movie maybe here's a tip for any younger listeners maybe's a no maybe's a harder no than no it's a worse no it's a real

I hate your soul no and I don't want to kill this nerd dead right in front of me by saying no so I'm going to lie and say maybe well this kid just broke into my house I guess I owe him a maybe so he doesn't murder me right but but guys because then

he's like oh maybe he's not no okay ha ha ha ha that's great brains can and then she kisses him like a big old smooch on the leaves yeah and then he's like oh she left me alone in her bedroom so this is

how the other half lives And he starts, like, walking around, and he finds a folder on the bedside, and she's been taking pictures of it. Yeah, because she... To send to the police, mildly. That may be is a no. That is a no. This is not happening. She's got a cork board.

It's like pictures of Kyle, pictures of trickster, pictures of Edward Furlong. Franklin Jell walks in the room. Oh, you found... Oh, no, those are actually my photos. I was looking for the murderer. and I thought you were a suspect. I was just staying with Kimberly for a bit. Photographer.

Whatever. Yeah, but no, it is to show you that, don't worry, if you're stalking a girl, she's probably stalking you right back, brother. Yep, exactly right. Yep. You just go for it, man. And then we get to the principal's office

because the principal says horror clubs canceled, anything you want to show games, movies, you've got to bring it to me first. And, oh, and Kyle comes back. Oh, man, thank God you didn't play that brain scan game. I heard he gave it some kid in texts an aneurysm. Oh, no, Jeremy, we're going out of business. Oh, the insurance isn't going to cover an aneurysm.

Good thing that I can disappear. Too bad you can't, Jeremy. The company's been in your name the whole time. Jeremy, hold this bag for me. Quite literally, it's all the documents owning Brain Scan LTD. I'm an immortal demon, and you're an intern. Goodbye. Oh, my God, that was the trick of brain scan the whole time.

We're screwing that kid, not this kid. So, yeah, but, you know, so a kid got an aneurysm. It's like a terrible game that, like, really fucks with your sensory capacity. Yeah. And he's like, but yeah, to your point, the principal's like, I want to watch any horror video you watch this horror club first. Yeah. And so he brings him, he's like, brain scan, and he sounds smutty or whatever. And he's like, he's just giving it a try.

It's really fun. and then like the guy's like all right whatever and there he's like standing in front of his desk only so that trickster can materialize in the chair behind him and he's like yeah i think you're gonna have a lot of fun and the trickster's just like thanks jeremy another victim thumbs up and he's like he winks at him too yeah yeah chricks yeah trickster's like very good michael because here's the thing when when when when eddie furlong realizes that the game hasn't actually ruined his life And it was just a real wild mind trip. He's like, bravo, trickster.

But, oh, hold on a second. The fact that trickster's here means it was real. Yep. Oh, why does he never, he should freak out about that. Yeah, but then we get a, the credit scene. We get great, IMDB crazy credits, which is just, ew. Well, the dog, right? Yeah, well, the credits start gut rolling, right?

It's a rock and roll metal song. And the credits shatter, because Trickser's like, we're not done yet, Jeremy. And the, no, this is now Trickster talking to us. Yes. And he's like, remember from the beginning? And the movie starts with the dog running, like, through the neighborhood, the same dog that had the hand before. The foot. Or the foot, sorry, yeah, that tattooed foot.

And so then, like, this dog's running again, and you realize, like, oh, he's got the foot in his mouth. And then the dog, like, runs up to Jeremy's house. or a Jeremy's house to Michael's house and sits in front of the house with the foot and puts the foot on the ground and does the trickster laugh or anything? Is there a giggle? Like a sinister giggle?

I don't get it. You know, what basically I believe what this is telling us is he killed the dude. He actually killed the first guy. And then nothing else happened. So we're only negating three quarters of the movie. Right. So hopefully the principles

brain scanning will cause some murders that gets him sent up the river instead, I guess. Oh, but I'll tell you what, wouldn't it be interesting? If the principal's, like, got Eddie Furlong on the brain, he's like, boy, I hate that. Yeah, absolutely. Play this dumb brain scan game.

Kill anyone you want, Principal Carruthers. And he's like, well, how about that Eddie Furlong? I bet that does happen. Wow, Principal Carruthers, you're awfully good at this. My powers are transferred. to you like the principal becomes trickster now because he was

so good at brain scan like you beat the golden level and you take over you're better at brain scan than I am and I invented it would anybody recommend this movie it's kind of fun um the ending is

kind of garbage and makes me a really annoyed but I think it's it's worth one one ride I feel it's just one ticket to ride yeah I always I would recommend it, too. You've seen it like seven times.

Yeah, you know, this was my version of brain scan. You know, I held up in a TV room for too long. Oh, yeah, dude. Can't go outside. What's that a party? No, no, no, no, I got a brain scan. I think it's kind of worth it too because it's like this, we haven't talked about it enough, but the time capsule of like 90s like heavy metal culture.

Yeah. Yeah. Oh, big time. This is like, it's a. single ticket ride for me, too. I'm never going to watch it again. I'm not upset that I did. I enjoy early 90s horror. Sure. So this is fine.

Although it does, it just kind of loses itself in like all the computery muckety muck and feels more sci-fi than horror. And this dude playing trickster's the worst character. It's so dumb. If you had a better villain, you know, like possibly explored

in, um, it's that Brad Durif? Or not Brad Durif. Um, what's his name? The dude from Blade, the villain in Blade, Stephen Dorff. What's that Stephen Dorff horror movie? It's like a killer website or whatever. Oh, Fear.com. Yeah, Fear.com. Like, if it was more towards

Fear.com than Drop Dead Fred, it might be a little more successful. This is sacrilege, folks at home. The trickster is great, and this guy did a mash-up guy. Well, the trickster doesn't kill anybody. He's got these claws on his hands. Yeah, really long, stupid fingers. Never uses it. Well, he just

tricks people, right? Yeah, I guess. That's it. Right? He's like Loki. Oh, yeah. Does that make sense to you? It does make sense. Does Loki kill people in those Thor's? No, he does. He does... He sends people CD-ROMs and then that...

No, it's updated, though. There are thumb drives that they're getting in the mail. That would be a good... I hope in Captain America Civil War, Captain America's tricked into playing brain scanning. That'd be good. That's Brain Scan from 1994. directed by John Flynn.

If you want to get a hold of us, check out our website, wh-hmpodcast.com, or find us at sideshownetwork. Dot TV. Right into the mailbag, we all hate movies at gmail.com. Like us on Facebook and follow us on Twitter. We're at WHM podcast. Okay, so Clue for next week's Spooktacular. It's fun to workout. At the workout.

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