We Hate Movies - S8: WHM Mail Bag: L.A. Letter Readin' (w/ Amir Blumenfeld!)

Episode Date: October 30, 2017

Recorded at the HeadGum studio in sunny Los Angeles! On a very special WHM Mail Bag, the gang welcomes If I Were You's Amir Blumenfeld on to read letters about earthquakes, giving up on rotten movies, bad date etiquette, Halloween pranks gone awry, parents showing their young kids inappropriate horror films, and sexy escapades gone terribly, terribly wrong!  Be sure to check out Amir's show, If I Were You as well as all the other rad shows on the network over at HeadGum! Unlock Exclusive Content!: http://www.patreon.com/wehatemovies See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This is a headgum podcast. We all go a little mad sometimes. You know, it's Halloween. I guess everyone's a title of one good scare. Sometimes. Dead is better. Zombies have entered the building. They're at the door.

They're coming in. It is time to keep your appointment with the Wicca Man. They're coming to get you, Barbara. He's sick for fucks. He's seen one too many movies. Now, Sid! Don't you blame the movies? Movies don't create psychos. Movies make psychos. Put the fucking lotion in the back of you.

There's an excellent day for an excellent day. welcome to WHM Mailbag everybody I'm Andrew Jupin alongside Steven Sadek, Christopher Cabin, Eric Siska and special guest in studio because we're recording in the headgum studios in Los Angeles Come here, Blumenfeld, how are you doing, buddy?

Nailed the last name too. Did you know the last name or did you have to ask somebody downstairs? I asked no one. You knew Blumenfeld? Blumenfeld, yeah. That's pretty solid. This is my first time knowing that, so I'm glad I know that. What do you get the, like, Bloomfields? Yeah, I got a Blumenfield, I got a Blumfeld, I get a bloom field.

I get a blum field. I get a green sometimes if they're way off. Really missing the mark with the green. But I've seen like people start shows before and they're like, hey, we're in the studio with. Oh, no. I actually was on the edge of my seat.

I was like, how's he going to pull this off? Watch them with. And that's a weird name a little bit for some. And you, of course, are also the, do you say, do you, like, do you guys share the host or are you co-hosts of if I were you, of course? Oh, yeah, I'll say co-host. Co-host of if I were you, that's correct, yeah.

And Jake's his host. Yeah, Jake's host, I co-host. You drew the short straw, which is why you're here today. That's right. And Jesus is our co-pilot, so there's three people. That's true. He's always right. Can I start with something from real life that just happened in the HeadGum Studios?

I think we have to address this because it's... Oh, okay. There was a little bit of an incident downstairs. We went out to a nice breakfast. Everyone decided to do a bathroom run. I was last. Chris was before me. And I go in the bathroom, the nice headgun bathroom

And the sink is still running. The faucet is just going. I like to prepare for the next person. That's not true. The next person is ready to go. That was the story you had, and I would like to say that I think that that's horseshit. Well, in Chris's defense, California has too much water. Yeah.

We're suffering an anti-trout right now. Just ask Tom Selleck and his avocados. What's going on with his avocado? Tom Selleck has an avocado farm, which because I guess Blue Bloods is, isn't really working out. I mean, it's doing fine. It's still on.

That's a surprise enough. That was the joke. Is it actually a farm or is it just his yard? This is garden? I don't know. I think he sells avocados, but he was caught sort of like stealing water from another place for these avocados, these mustache brand avocados. Wow. That's smart because he has something to fall back on after Blue Buds, whereas Donnie Walberg, I imagine, is clenching to that thing with all his mics.

I know, he just thought somebody else is going to grow avocados after him, so he decided to just leave it running. Smart. See, smart guys think of me and Donnie Walbert. You couldn't just say, oops, I accidentally left the zinc on it, because that's what happened. No, why would I do that? That's a lie. I'm not going to lie to our audience now. That's even worse.

All right. Let's get to some letters. Okay. Because I'm getting aggravated at your ignorance, Chris Cabin. Steve Sadek, why don't you start us off here? Dear Sirs, sorry, we hate earthquakes. Dear Sirs, international listener here from Mexico City, which we're only starting with because there's a mirror is here.

I want to be like, oh, we've got people all over the place. Thank you. All over the globe. I love your podcast in general, and your pop culture references in particular, because I think you're on the exact same age as all of you.

Anywho, yesterday I was listening to the It episode while eating a sandwich. Which episode? It. The It episode. He was doing like a who's on the first thing. Is that where you were attempting? Yeah.

We should watch a movie called That. there is it then it episode while eating a sandwich in my parked car outside of a grocery store don't judge my lifestyle wait so are you eating the sandwich and then going to get more food afterwards or is it like did you make the sandwich

did you go to the grocery store and assemble a sandwich in his car I think that was no I think it was maybe a deli sandwich and it's like thank God I'm finally at my car when I can eat lunch yeah I agree with that you don't want to be eating in the grocery store that's like the saddest tier Have you ever done a walking bag of like you buy something

And then you're just walking around Noshing on it And then you pay for an empty bag At the end of the grocery store Trust me, I ate this Just swipe the bag I don't trust myself to actually pay for it Which is the thing

I feel like I'd let that empty Doritos bag fly Oh the Doritos new Of course they'd be Doritos A paper bag filled with Doritos Uh ba-Bah Dundjima Don't Jima Lifestyle When all of a sudden I felt my car swaying back and forth

My first thought was that someone was doing something horrible to my car, as is common in these parts. So I exited immediately and realized that we were in the middle of a horrible earthquake. Thankfully, I'm okay, and my friends and family are okay as well. Yeah, this is the Mexico City earthquake. It's the earthquake of the year. But it was scary, almost as scary as graphic descriptions of blood running down a bathroom sink and John Ritter doing all sorts of weird shit. John Ritter has an almost sex scene in that movie.

very close and that's an almost sex that's enough to scare you you don't need the clown first base stuff I think he only got first base stuff and then that guy called him and it was like that clown came back

that that's a that's a boner killer good good I was about to commit a crime so that's good keep on keeping on Joaquin and P.S you're all wrong about Jiminy Glick he is hilarious Jimity Glick came up in a previous episode I guess so I mean I don't remember

where that's from but Amir where do you stand on Jiminy Glick I agree with this guy, Joaquin, I think he's hilarious. Okay. I really do. And I don't, I'm not, I think many things are overrated and bad. So don't think I'm not like, I'm like just like an open pupil accepting all light in.

Sure. I am pretty selective and I, granted I haven't seen him in 20 years, but as the 13 year old Amir, loved Jiminy Glick. I think it's a thing where I just can't do fat suits for the life of me. That's who killed it for me. You think that's appropriation, probably. Yeah, exactly. You were all fucking Martin, short.

Come on. That's the word I use to make fun of me. Yeah, he's so funny. Earthquake stories. Anyone been in an earthquake? Oh, I got a great one. Oh, please. I got a great one.

Do it up. Born and raised, sorry, born and Israel, raised in L.A. We had a big quake in 94 the day before my birthday. Ooh. January 17th, 1994, 5.7-ish earthquake. I forget the exact amount. It's pretty big. Bookcases falling down.

Neighbors running out into the street at like 4 or 5 a.m. Fortunately, my parents' house was fine, you know, save for a little damage, but my friend's house wasn't very good. So their parents were in Israel, so they stayed with me and my family for the next couple days, because, you know, aftershocks, you don't want kids alone in their own house. One of my friend's little brother comes over with his prize possession that he needs. needs with him at all times a box of basketball cards obviously these are you know Larry Johnson rookie cards so you can't just leave him alone in a house no somebody's gonna take him yeah was okay or no Luke Longley was okay survived the trip we were playing football in my front yard area and I was looking for a catch a pass

to catch running looking over my left shoulder I hit my dad's car that I I didn't see. I hit a parked car, which is like a famous joke. You're so dumb. You hit a parked car. I hit a parked car and split my lip open on the box of basketball cards that my friend put on my dad's car. I am like, you know, drizzling blood and I need to go to the emergency room. Keep in mind this day after the biggest earthquake in like 40 years. So I'm going to the hospital. My dad is a doctor, so he speeds me past this long line of people waiting who are actually suffering earthquake victims. It was just a guy holding his other arm. Yeah, and it was like, sorry, my 11-year-old child cut his lip open on a box of basketball cards. We've got a boo-boo here. Sorry, excuse me, sir. We've got a really bad boo-boo.

I skip the line and get little stitches. Wake up the next morning. So the day after the earthquake, I have a fat lip with stitches down my face. And that's how I turned 11. So that's a pretty good earthquake story. What did your friend say? Did you ruin any cards? I think he felt a little bit bad because, like, why did he keep his cards right there?

Fortunately, they were still in the box. So again, the Mugsy Boggs, fourth year NBA basketball player basketball card survived. Didn't get any blood on it. No blood on the mugsy. I have one that's almost as exciting. When the most recent one in New York, I was sitting on the couch and I felt like the couch move. And I was like, oh, what's that? And Steve said, I don't know.

That's the story. That's really good. It's arrowing. The New York earthquake was interesting. It was very divisive. Because it was either, like, people were like, this was the craziest thing that's ever happened in this town. When was it? Hell, maybe like four or five years ago at this point.

Or other people just didn't even feel it. Yeah, I was there for that. It was really bizarre. I thought my building was swaying because it was, you know, it was on a high-rise working or whatever. It was like, oh, weird, the building is swaying. And then everyone's like, no, that's an earthquake. And it just, then I, like, almost threw up because of nausea. Like, it just hit me immediately kind of everything.

I didn't notice anything. No, nothing. I think it's a false flag. I don't think it actually happened. I think it's a hoax. Truman Show-esque? Yeah, I think so. It's all set up to make me feel bad

about not experiencing an earthquake. But this kind of reminds me of, I would, your story about the basketball cards. I hate ruining other people's stuff. Like, you know what I mean? It's bad. I went, my first sleepover, I was playing with my buddy's Nightcrawler toy,

and I broke it. Oh, no. And I didn't take responsibility. You did the old, I put it in my pocket. Nightcrawler is missing. Wait, you broke it and then stole it. It's not stolen. It's broken. It's basically it's stealing, but it's

you stole something you broke. When did you start sending the ransomware? Yeah. Peace by piece. Especially because it's already broken, so you can send it the arm. No, I just, you know, I felt really bad and I didn't want to take responsibility. So it's like, now it's just missing

and it's not broken. Right. So that's a coward. It's worse. What you did was worse. I think I could beat that. Oh, yeah? I was like, oh, well, I want to see if my friend is awake, so I'm gonna rat a tad on his window

with this little rock because that's what movies do. They do that in the movies. Yeah. Okay, so I throw the rock and it goes right through the window and I'm just, I'm like, I'm getting out of here.

What time was this? Well, we were in college. Oh, okay. You're a grown man. Oh, yeah, yeah. And I didn't own up to it until recently. So he wakes up with a rock by his dude. Yeah, and he was complaining for weeks

about like how someone like busted his window and I'm just like, man, that's terrible. Oh, man, you're right. That's low. That's awesome. I love that. Who could do such a thing? Not me.

All right, Chris Cabin. All right. The first time you truly hated a movie. Dear WHM, I'm curious to know something. When was your first instance of truly absolutely 100% without question hating a movie? I can recall mine as it was one of the most vivid and yet most horrifyingly well-remembered moments of my entire life. Wow. Allow me to paint you a picture, won't you?

Oh, please. You're gonna. It was the year 2000. We were just getting over Y2K. No. We were fresh off of surviving, oh, that is true. We were fresh off of surviving Y2K, and we were all feeling really good. My father and I were playing to go see a movie together as it was a tradition that we had started many years prior.

The movie that we would go see were often terrible. End of days, Godzilla, but in my adolescent mind, I always seemed to find something enjoyable in them, and therefore I could overlook their flaws and just be entertained, much to the chagrin of my father. That was not the case on this day. On this day, my father and I went to see Supernova, the Walter Hill picture.

I've never seen it, I've never heard of it. Didn't it get Alan Smythe? Did he Alan Smythe that or no? I don't know. I don't know for sure on that. I knew Walter Hill direct. I think his name's on it. Oh, no, you know, I'm thinking of a virus.

Oh, yes. Which was kind of around the same time. Or Red Planet, which is like the same movie. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. If you don't recall Supernova, I do. It is a pseudo-alien knockoff that has some excellent actors turning in some truly awful performances,

a plot that makes absolutely no sense and a revolving door of directors. It also features the only instance of a super jacked James Spader, which is a strange sight to really take it. What year is this? I guess 2000, he was jacked? This is like, yeah, 99-2000. I thought he fell off the cliff at that point. Yeah, was this CGI? That was probably right before he gave up,

right before he started planning for his role in Lincoln and starting AM 24-7. In 12 years, I'm going to be in a Lincoln film and I need to play an obese man. Yes, I mean, you have to think forward. Like I do with Fawcett, see? It's all coming together here. You're so full of shit with that fucking Fawcett,

I can't even tell you. We sat in the theater dumbfounded by what we were seeing on the screen. From Robert Forster being... Turn page over. being turned into some sort of goop creature due to a space pod malfunction Oh no, I'm being turned into a space goop creature

Robert Forster And George Clooney, you never loved her To Lou Diamond Phillips and Robin Tooney fucking all over this spaceship And once again, Super Jack James Spitter We were trying to make sense of this incomprehensible mess But our minds just couldn't This guy's kind of selling me on Superdove by the way

I didn't want to say anything I never saw it. Now I want to desperately. It's pretty boring, actually. But James Spader is quote-unquote jacked in it. I'm talking about the Lou Diamond Phillips and Robin Tunney's sex scenes all over the place. That's something. Are they in zero gravity?

I think so. I think that's the trick. Has anyone fucked in space? Do we know that for sure one way or another? Amir, have you fucked in space? I have not fucked in space, but I haven't had sex on Earth either. So I'm a bad person to ask. That has to have been an experiment.

Somebody had to. Yeah, somebody did it. That sounds like a Russia thing. At the very least, Hank's J-D-O and the Vomit Comet while shooting Apollo 13. That checks out. Yeah, that checks out. The five-mile high club.

Yeah, hand stuff has to happen at some point. Yeah, hand stuff. The hand stuff. Sorry for saying hand stuff quite so many times. You get a T-shirt just as I went to space, and all I got was his lousy hand stuff. I hand-stuffed in space. When we finally left the theater,

my father looked at me and simply said, if you say I liked it, I'm going to be very disappointed. That's a lot of weight, dad. This sounds like a tough dad. I reassured him by telling him that the film was awful and I hated it and the two of us walked out.

Thankfully, my dad didn't hit me. Another great night at the movies. A new bond formed in our mutual hatred of one absolutely terrible movie. Wow. So having spilled my story of woe, I ask again, what is the first instance

where you truly hated a movie? Thanks for the lapse and more Kevin Huh I truly hate it I don't know Man that's like in full Because like I remember I have the story where I walked

At a very young age I walked out of Necessary Roughness Just because I was bored To tears I just love the idea of walking I don't think I knew How to walk out of a movie at that age Yeah I didn't know that you could do that

Also necessary up is a very entertaining movie For children It's like a silly football game I just hate it just I guess it's a tell that I don't watch sports I think I was saying Fumbolaia Fumble Ruski for a really long time.

Kathy Ireland is a kicker. I want to watch Unnecesser roughness now. Yeah, there's so much about that movie that I bet still work, including all the Sinbad. I was going to say, is that Sinbad's best movie, probably. Yeah, but it doesn't kind of count,

it's not a Sinbad movie. It's a movie that Sinbad happens to be in. That's why it's good, right? House Guest is the, please. House Guest is the best. I think as the, yeah, the list of Sinbad starring vehicles, it's house guest. It's got to be house guest.

Because then you're also just like, boosted by Phil Hartman supporting performance. So basically unnecessary roughness is like the godfather two. Necessary roughness.

I apologize. Necessary reference the godfather two of Sinbad movies. Like Robert De Niro is in Godfather 2 but it's not a, it's maybe one of his best performances

but it's not a Robert De Niro movie. Right. Similarly so with necessary roughness. Interesting. That's right. And let that be known. It's the first time

Robert De Niro and Sinbad will ever be compared in such a way. I saw Gone Fishing as a kid and that was the one where I was like, oh this is like literally terrible like i was a kid i like joe pesci you know home alone the whole thing denny glover and i was with with my family and i just remember and it was a thing where the whole family kind of got in on it at the end i was like as we left the theater i was kind of expecting everyone to like it and maybe i saw that movies were wrong for the first time but i was

like that movie stunk and i was like yeah that's that's a crummy movie yeah can you remember i guess it's the first time you walked out of a movie if ever well the first walk i see because I had the thing where it's like, well, I pay it, I have to sit here until I started actually working at a movie theater. When I was a projectionist, you know, then you just walked out. I walked out of that Matthew McConaughey dragon movie rain of fire. I walked out of you don't mess with the

Zohan. Oh, I heard that movie was pretty funny actually. Yeah, I kind of checked out when he was like beating a man to death with his feet. I'm back in. I remember as a kid, I know what you're doing this weekend. You're watching necessary roughness. Don't mess with the Zohan. Double feature. It's kind of a good weekend you're setting

yourself of a friend in mind for his birthday wanted to go see the Brendan Fraser George of the jungle

and I got like As opposed of Robert De Niro George of the Jungle Yeah so that's correct and the Sinbad George of the Jungle

Martin Scorsese George of Jungle Right yeah that was one with Sinbad No but I had had enough and I faked

having diarrhea and went out to the arcade I was like man I can't stop going to the bathroom I'm sorry and left this kid a lot

was just the two of us and I left this kid alone in the movie theater to watch Georgia the Jungle, or Georgia the Jungle, and just played arcade games for 90 minutes, because I could not with that movie. I walked out of Mortal Kombat Annihilation. That checks out. Because I was like, well, that first movie was

okay. But yeah, I don't know. When you're young, you're just like, oh, well, movies are entertaining in some ways. That one just tested me to limit it. It tested your might, you might say? Oh, yes. I, like, viscerally hating

a movie, though. I don't think I, like, actually, like, actively hated a movie until Mystery man. I think that was it and I was like, really? Fuck, this movie and I just like, no. I think because at early age, like, my dad would walk out of movies. Yeah, you're dead. He would leave you in the theater?

Well, no, like my mom. You're walking home. Was you trying to abandon you? Oh, he came back again. You want to go to jungle to jungle, huh? You want to go to jungle to jungle, huh? Well, I'm going to go somewhere else. That's that Tim Allen movie? Yeah. Oh, yeah. That kid went to my high school.

Jonathan Taylor Thomas? No, no, that's a different kid. Wait, what? The kid from jungle to jungle was a different kid. No, no, you're thinking of a man of the house. Man of the house with Chevy Chase. God, I feel like my world has been rocked. So, yeah.

I've been in an earthquake now. But, like, it was a thing where, like, there was kind of an unspoken rule where you don't talk to the jungle to jungle kid. Like, you know what he is? But he'd, like, spit on you? He's here and you're here. You know what I mean? He's like a super kid. Uh-huh.

You're trash. What was his name? I don't remember. That's awesome. That's the point. and you knew him I don't remember I hope he's listening

He's not But if he was That's a pretty sick burn All right It's me Let's see here Worst movie date Did you

Do I have a disgusting one I seem to get stuck With the disgusting one Some of the times I think this is a wrestling Something about wrestling Oh well that's pretty disgusting I guess we'll see what happens

All right let's see Worst movie date Dear WHM Longtime listener and first-time writer. I wanted to share a story about my worst-ever movie date, which includes a bonus celebrity encounter.

Oh, I remember reading this one. This is actually quite humiliating. In middle school, I had a huge crush on a girl in my English class who drew all over the pages of her notebook. So she was a kid in a school. I remember her handing in homework once

and passing it up to me. And there were tons of awesome. All right, come on. He's still thinking about this girl, man. Seriously, this is a hang-up, man. I'm going to skip a little bit. She was only nine, but she was really hot.

It took me four months, but I finally worked up the courage to ask her out via note. I drew all over it and passed it back. My heart leapt into my chest when she handed it back. Yes, with a bunch of smiley faces and unicorns around it.

We talked a little and decided on going to see Galaxy Quest since it looked funny. Can I call bullshit really quick? Because this guy says that he's very... Where's that ticket stub? No, no. He says, oh, I was such a shy, awkward kid.

You're asking people out when you're nine. That's not shy. That's not awkward. That's not awkward. That is very full. I made up nine. It's middle school. It says middle school.

But even still, I mean, yeah, 14. Before 24, I mean, I think you're pretty. Before 20. I don't know about anybody else, but maybe I'm revealing a bit too much. My mom drove me to the theater and dropped me off so I could walk up all cool, like, good move. I had even brought her flowers. This is a real deal date. Wow.

14-year-old buying flowers. That's a little romantic kid, huh? Well, we ate her out? Oh, sorry, I'm reading ahead. Oh, you can't skip. Continue, sorry. Her dad dropped her off and shook my hand, and she seemed really happy to see me

and impressed by the flowers. Then he said, there ain't going to be no fucking tonight. Oh, that's not, wow. Oh, no, that was Martin Lawrence and Bad Boys, too. Then we made the mistake of going to see the movie. I'm not saying the movie is bad. The movie's really good. I mean, I'm kind of whatever about that movie, but let's continue.

Here's the thing, those people that will tell you, like, you want a good Star Trek movie, you want a really good Star Trek movie, you watch Galaxy Quest. And I'm like, no, motherfucker, I'll watch a Star Trek movie. Not a fucking Tim Allen movie. And don't kid yourself, it's a Tim Allen movie. I don't care how good Alan Rickman is in that movie. That's a Tim Allen movie. Do not forget that. You're still reading.

Anyway, back to the date. This is what happens. These rants pop up. Oh, it's about to get good. And then Tim Allen ate me out. Oh, man. The mistake was all on 13-year-old me. See, this is why you don't date that young.

The theater wasn't super busy, so we found a good seat. I was looking around the theater and spotted a very tall man a few rows down, presumably with his date. He turned to talk to her, and I realized I recognized him. It was WWF Superstar, The Undertaker. Oh. Come on. First of all, why is he sitting in the front? He should be in the back.

That's very rude, Undertaker. And that wasn't his girlfriend. That was Paul Bear. Let's all just, you know, know this now. Oh, the movie's about to start. I love Tim Allen Movies, Taker. Oh, that guy's dead. He is dead.

I proceeded to start talking about the Undertaker constantly for the next five minutes until the preview started. Oh, then I suggested, quote, let's move closer to the Undertaker so I can get an autograph Okay, stop eating me out I gotta get to this fucking John Hancock

What I love that So flowers, you're starting off really well You impress the dead Galaxy Quest And then you're evening it out with the Undertaker You're going to bad territory That scale is starting to slide My date seemed

Okay with this But I'm sure she was starting to worry I barely paid attention to the movie I just kept staring at the back of Undertaker's head for almost 15 minutes. I would do the same thing. I kept expecting Cain to attack him or for him to summon some undead minions.

I started watching the movie but couldn't get into it and started fidgeting around. My date asked if I wanted to go get dinner or something and I said, nah, let's wait for the Undertaker. Let's say let's wait for it. Pretend you're into the movie at that point. I think you're in love with The Undertaker. I went on a date with The Undertaker.

That's kind of, you guys, one row ahead? Except I said it really loud since in my child brain he would acknowledge me and not at all be annoyed. The movie ended and I kept waiting for Undertaker to get up so I could ask for an autograph since it would be rude while he was just sitting there. I realized he was trying to wait me out and we sat in silence for another five to ten minutes until an usher told us to leave. I like The Undertaker sitting in, Sheila, we can't go. Sheila, nope, nope, I'm not getting up until this little weirdo leaves. He's there.

I know he's there. He's going to ask me to sign a receipt. Yeah, what are you bringing to get autographed? Popcorn bag, receipt, ticket, stuff? Your chest. Sheila, Sheila, just look behind me. Is that weird little kid there? The weird little kid?

Still, still, still. You're a wrestler. Are you not used to fan adoration? Seriously, man. You're the Undertaker. You know what, The Undertaker's fucking off tonight. He's trying to go on a date to the Galaxy Quest. The Undertaker stood up and started moving really quickly to the exit.

Good move, Taker. I shoved past my date, knocking over her purse. I asked Taker for an autograph, and he just looked at me. His wife, I think, was helping my date get her purse back together. Oh, and so that means like shit fell out of it. All over the place, it's embarrassing. She's probably got like three condoms in that bag. Three condoms, huh?

You never know. 13-year-olds with three condoms. A pre-written note that says, I'm ready to go. Oh, my God. No, none of this is happening at this Galaxy Quiz screening. Yeah. I will never forget what happened next. Taker got down on a knee to stare me in the eyes and said,

was it worth it, kid? No, he did it. And then walked away with his wife. I never saw him again, except for on TV, which doesn't count as seeing someone again, by the way. My date refused to talk to me and just left. In English class on Monday, I tried to apologize, but she just said,

tell your boyfriend the Undertaker that you're going to be free this weekend. Sick burn, sick burn, 13-year-old. No, you know, Sydney? His name is Taker, all right? That's what we have together. I was a huge jerk and deserved all of that, but looking back now, I do kind of wish I got an actual author. autograph instead of just an emotional slap to the face to remember Undertaker by.

Thanks, and I hope to see you guys live in 2018. All my best, Mike. See, that's why you don't harass your heroes at movie theaters, Mike. I just love that. Was it worth it? You hit her purse over. Was it worth it? Yeah.

I'm talking to you, right, Undertaker? You're the man. We're going to hang out now, right? I'm really bad with meeting, like, celebrity. Like, I remember I got a book signed by Michael Sheebon once. Uh-huh. One of my heroes, and I just totally spazzed out. I'm, like, really awful in that.

I don't actually like meeting people that I'm really enamored with, because I'm bad at it, and I don't want to have that conversation. It's shocking that you're bad at something like that. For a guy like Sheeban, too, you probably freaked him out. I definitely. Oh, I was, like, heavy breathing looking at him, like, you're a genius. His wife was like, is he gone yet?

And then he looked at me and said, it wasn't worth it. Anybody else? Some bad celeb stories? Um, I once waited like four hours to get an autograph from Billy Corrigan. Smashy Pumpkins were playing our mall. Yeah, that was a sad day. They played, it wasn't just playing the mall. It was playing the FYE in the shitty mall.

And so the way it lined up is it was all the members of the band. And like each one, they were, all of them were very nice. But Corkin was at the very end. And he had a bodyguard to hold the posters down and everything. So I go, I, I'm, I said hi to like Jimmy Chamberlain and all them. and like this was still like they were it was like jimmy and darcy like everybody was like band at that point right when a door came out so like they were still around okay um and i just remember coming billy corgan had like this mountain and this will tell you what

happened to him a mountain of taco bell there yeah and like i like that i just went up and i was like i'm a huge thank you so much and he just like cool move on well you were like the thousandth one at the mall that day yes well probably two thousand yes but yeah that was that's about I was sweaty. Did they play a show, or was it, like, just like a couple songs? They played, like, three or four songs in the middle of this mall. Like, it felt, I kind of was like, what are you doing here? It's sad, man.

Well, it's, I saw in a similar mall situation, Aqua. Wow. But it wasn't like, I was, like, walking by, and they were like, hey, the Barbie girl people are singing in front of this other FYE. And then the concert didn't last long because she didn't even make it to the chorus and some dude, like, made a reach. Whoa. And that shit got shut down.

Yeah. Yeah. That's, that's seeing Aqua. Eric, we saw you do it. The Undertaker asked that guy, you just ruined Aqua for everybody. It wasn't worth it. He said, call me Ken, and you sort of

lunged for her. Booty. Her buttock. Yeah, I'm trying to think of some, like, embarrassing things. I had to help Martin Scorsese and his wife into seating one time at the Burns. And that was the only time that it got, I couldn't even talk.

Like, there was like a hand, like, it was very nice. And he was like, yeah, that's fine. Where's my seat? We reserved handicapped sitting. It's supposed to be over here. And then they sat down and watched this like PBS art documentary and that was it. The other day I was at. Ooh, the other day.

Not the other week. Well, still like, like in 2017. Yeah, I was walking down the street and there's an outdoor diner on Broadway called the Apple Jack Diner. Of course, very famous. Which is supposedly notorious for Jackie Mason always being there. And I saw him outside. dining al fresco and I was

I mean yes but that's hilarious what does I mean dining alfesco outside outside yeah it's just a really douchebag way to say you're eating outside about Jackie Mason we're also talking about eating at the Applejack diner dude come on it's a terrible place he eating his pasta al dente

I think he might have been and I just was like man I should yell something about Caddy Shack too and I froze up and I was just like let him go about his day I don't you know he's a writer for Bright Bart now but I would love to yell at him Jackie Mason. He's got to be 149 years.

He's up there. He's up there. He's like, he's like, he looks like a California raisin. He writes for Breitbart now? He does like vlogs for them. Oh, yeah. You know what, even better. Yeah.

Even better vlogs with Jackie Mason. Because he had his own YouTube ones that were getting political and then like Breitbart offered him like money to put it on their side. Wow, he's a genius. I mean, they have quite, they have quite the roster. Him, Davy. Oh, Robert Dobby does it. Don't they have like two other like

Scott Bayle-List celebrities? Jay-List celebrities. All right, Eric Siska. Embarrassing Halloween. Okay, here we go. We had asked people for Halloween stories. So this is the first one we actually got.

Embarrassing Halloween. Dear W.H.M. You wanted Halloween horror stories. So here you go. I should, is this preface or preface? You could say preface. I like preface. So you know Al Fresco.

I'm going to say. quite make your way through preface. I need a breath of first air. I'm going to go Alphresca. I only know certain things. This story by telling you that back in the day, I was what you would call a little asshole.

Constantly causing trouble, pulling mean pranks, and just flat out bothering people. Thanks for the preface of that all there. Join the club. So I deserve everything I had coming to me. My favorite person to bother was a fellow shit had Josh. Oh, I heard of this guy.

Josh is the only. person I ever fought, he bragged about being, and I quote, a ninja pro. Oh, man. Kids are so stupid. Go ahead. One day while walking home from school, he displayed some of his ninja skills and I, and lightly slapped me in the arm. Ah, that famous ninja move of arm slapping. The author's slap fighting. While it didn't hurt, it did knock my Dr. Pepper out of my hand, which made me mad enough to kick his ass. Oh, wow. You know what? I feel like Josh is a different version.

to the story. Yeah. Well, the way Josh tells it. You know, we should tell this story like Roshman. Like, get every single perspective. After the fight, I was still very angry. This was a large-sized fountain Dr. Pepper that I had just purchased it. Josh was trying to save you from a life of miserable diabetes.

Yeah. I stood over this for a couple days and decided more action was needed. Needed to be taken. I called up my best friend at the time, Jimmy. By the way, at the time, that's a falling out. But here's my question. What does kick his ass mean? Is this kid in the hospital and you're trying to try to finish it?

You're going to finish this fucker off. Turn off the respirators. Oh, my God. I decided I was going to pull the plug on Josh. We had devised a plan to take the pumpkins off of Josh's porch and smash them in his driveway. The perfect crime. Oh, man, the pumpkins that his parents paid for. Turns out riding a bike and carrying a large pumpkin is more difficult than, wait, one than we had assumed.

Jimmy slowed as I sped up, his back tire and my front tire collided, and we both hit the ground. I laid on the asphalt covered in pumpkin guts with a broken arm as Jimmy rode off, leaving me for dead. I don't understand something. Why are they riding away with the pumpkins? The plan was to smash them in the driveway. Or maybe they were grabbing pumpkins to go to Josh's house. I guess so they're stealing pumpkins on top of this. Yeah, it's a crime spray at this point.

Soon after, Kung Fu, Josh, is it ninjitsu or kung fu? Yeah, let's, you know what, let's get our story straight. He's a ninja pro, so it just covers everything. It's a real catch-all. It's a blanket statement. Crom of God, the whole thing. And his mother came out and took me to the hospital. Oh my God, doing a prank and then having to go to the hospital.

Taken by your enemy's mother. Sitting in that waiting room, sandwich between Josh and his mother was the most awkward 90 minutes of our life. Not a single word was spoken, and the shit-eating smile never left Josh's face. He's earned, honestly. Ninja Pro earned this one.

Yeah, I'm on Josh's side. Even though Josh probably doesn't like our show. Later that week, I showed up to school in the same costume I had worn for the last three Halloweens, Jason Voorheed. It was the go-to. You just put on a bad flannel shirt, And all you had to buy was that mask.

And that costume comes back. I did this for years. It's an evergreen costume. Wait, so you didn't cosplay to like to, you know, throw mud all on yourself and smell like shit? No, dude. I was in it purely for the candy. Because, yeah, Jason was shitting himself. He had to have been.

Oh, all the time. Pisses and shits. Nobody quite understood why my version of Jason had a cast. But that didn't stop every single seventh grade boy and some of the girls from punching me in my broken fucking arm. Oh, my God. What's a cruel school? Is this battle royale?

Kids are terrible. Then they burned him alive. And he started haunting that school ever since. Yeah, and then he wrote this as a ghost from one of the computers. Oh, ghost writers. Yeah. I like it. Not sure if you'll read this on the show or not, but I thought I'd share.

Thanks for the years of quality entertainment. You guys are fucking great. Happy Halloween, Gary. Well, happy Halloween, Gary. but I still think I'm on Josh's side. One, two, Gary's commentary. Four, better not break

your arm. One time I tried to, I was trying to impress my friends, and I might have told the story. I put it, I was drinking, I finished drinking a snap while I was walking down the street. I was like, hey guys, watch this. And I shoved it under somebody's tire.

I'm like, this is badass and cool. And then this grown man jumped out. He was like, why are you doing this to my dad's car? And I was like, ah, ah, uh. And he's like, you know it's going to break his tire, right? You know that's going to totally ruin his tire. And he's going to have to spend $200 to get a new tire. Why would you do this to my dad's car?

And I had to, like, pick it up and apologize. Did you start crying? No, I did not start crying. But this guy was like a massive dude. And he was like, it was very, like, he didn't want to hit me. He didn't want to hit me, but I wish he would. Like, you know what I mean? It was one of those dressing downs where I'm like,

I just hope physical violence comes in and just cuts this story. It would just be easier if this guy just slap me. across the face with his big Bronx ringed hand. Exactly. Look, man, I was just trying to do something before Adventures of Pete Pete come on. Could you just Any other pranks, Gonerai? You were...

Goneraya. Johnny, you had your fair share of pranks back in the day. Do you have any, like, blow up in your face? horribly? No, one time in college, elevator door is closing. I'm in it with a friend. a lady is on the other side of it. And I forget the exact reason,

but I basically took a bite out of cookie and threw it at her, sort of like being like a fake cool guy. But as I threw it at her and the doors were closing, it hit her in the eye. She's like, you hit me in the eye.

And then she pressed the button so like the elevator door is just reopened. She's like, why did you hit me in the eye? I was like, I didn't know we'd have this. I thought it'd be like, throw, boom, gone. And now I'm talking to you. And I'm sorry.

Should I get out of the elevator? It's the conversation that you don't want to have. I get it. I did it. I'm sorry. I messed up. Yeah. I was at the same multiplex that I grew up working and I was cleaning a theater one time

with a bunch of other staff members and I found an umbrella that someone had left. And it was like, time to be fucking hilarious. And I took the umbrella and I like swatted it so it inverted. And it was like, oh, isn't this so funny? Some idiot left this umbrella. And the rest of the kids. cleaning the theater were like frozen and staring behind me and I turn around and there's this massive dude just standing there wearing a raincoat but not holding an umbrella.

Is it the guy from I know you did last summer? He has his wicker. Yeah. And his fisherman outfit and I just sort of looked at him and put it together instantly and then had to do the fold the umbrella back to the way it's supposed to be and it was kind of difficult and took longer than it should have and gave it back to him with like a here you go and just got a yeah thanks and walked away yeah thanks is how you want that to end yeah because it could have really ended with a punch in the face it was a it was a nice umbrella i have a good one and this is intensely embarrassing um perfect so in middle school we found out that one of our substitute teachers the one who came a lot um he also worked at like a local like news stand like a bodega except for it's in

suburbs. Did he come a lot there too? Yes, he did. All over the wall. I thought about saying something, but just let it go. You're a bigger man than me. He was like number one sub. Was that the idea? He was like the popular guy? He did it a lot. And then like he had the coolest sweater. His regular job was

in Newton Plaza. Okay. So he worked at a shop. Yeah, like when the convenience store type thing. And so me and my friend, the same friend that got me into the shit on the bus from the last mailbag there. Um, he was like, you know, it would be funny if we stole something from a shop. Oh, that's not funny at all. So me being an idiot, I said, yeah, man.

You were a bad kid. So you empty the registers. I came in with a gun. Give me a cash. Give me a cash. As a joke. As a goof. I bought a gun.

So, no, I went and, uh, because I was like 13 at times, I was like, ooh, porno mags. Oh, man, lifting porno mags. So it was like a penthouse form. It was a smaller. one. Oh, you took the literature? The digest size. Yes. But it still had pictures in it, man. Yeah, yeah. That's true. That's true.

So I got it in my pocket, looked around and everything, and like the guy didn't see me. And I was like, oh, awesome. So I walked right out. A guy held the door for me. Let the door close. And he's like, hey man, you want to put that back? I was like, oh, what? And he's like, I'm a police officer. Oh, man. I'm a police officer. Do you want to go? and put back the thing you stole. Oh, shit. Sure.

Sure, I'll do that. He's like, yeah, let me help you do that. And he opened the door back. Oh, man. Oh, that stinks. I just, like, openly, didn't try to hide at all. Just placed it back where it was. Here's your pornography back, sir.

And the kicker is that I did have this guy as a substitute after, and he did not look at me once. Oh, well, you know, you got caught stealing his porn. Yeah. That's un unforgivable. That's his living. That's his product. Slinging porn. All right.

Amir, you're up. Oh, boy. Now I just read words. All right. Sounded out. That's fine. I could do this. Worst, worst, worst, worst, worst, worst, worst, worst, parent.

I'm so sorry. I am almost done. Peron. P-A-R-E-P-A-R-E parents. It's pronounced preface. This is going great. All right, I got it. Worst parents ever.

Ever, actually. Oh, Ivar. Worst Peronce Ivar writes Hello, gents, first of all, love the show You provide your listeners with the gift of laughter Which is a great gift indeed Thank you for everything you do All right, that didn't apply to me

So I'm just going to move right along It was nice to hear someone else reading it This guy have a monocle on when he wrote this It's your network man, you're helping out That's all you wanted me to read I think you've given someone the gift of laughter At least months By proxy, by proxy. All right, anyway, the most

the most prominent memory of going to the movies occurred at the tender age of 11. My parents, who didn't really go to the movies, wanted to see a horror double feature on a lazy Sunday afternoon. I don't recall seeing many horror movies at that point in my life. I may have seen parts of Halloween or Friday the 13th, but nothing much beyond that. And boy, oh, boy, was I about to have my eyes opened. First up was 1983's Video Drove.

Come on. A film that you have referenced many times and a film that is every bit as fucked up as you say it is. I vividly recall seeing a man shove a VHS tape into his gut slash chest vagina. That's noted

creep James Woods, of course. Oh, interesting. Who's now a terrible human? Yeah. Who knew? Yeah. Thank God for Twitter. Now we know he's bad. Somebody put a bad tape in his tummy, and he turned to do a weird ass. Now he's in Twitter Dome. Yeah. I'm

11, so I get the hell out of there and I hit the Ladybug arcade machine right outside the corner. Now we're talking. I feel like I would have stayed for video drum and just see where that goes, man. After the first movie, there's a brief intermission, so I headed back in for round two.

The second movie was the most disturbing film I've ever seen. What was it? 1983, that year, 1983's X-T-R-O, a film that is forever ingrained into my mind. Do you guys know what this movie is? Yeah, I don't.

It's pretty fucked up. Got it. Here's a summary. A father is taken by aliens. he later returns changed. I vividly recall the father the father biting his son on the neck. There were totally fucked up

humanoid grasshopper things lurking in the weeds and the scene I'll never forget, a woman gives birth to a fully grown man. He literally rips his way out of her womb like a stripper popping out of a birthday cake. Oh Lord. For some reason, I didn't go play ladybug this time. I watched a whole

damn movie. Was I in shock? Perhaps years later, I rented XTRO to see if I was just as disgusting as I recall. And yeah, it was. What horror movie has left an imprint on y'all? Yours truly Adam from Michigan. Oh, man.

Well, first of all, I got to rent extra. It's really cheap. So all this stuff, it is, I mean, it is really fucked up and gross. But it's also just like, they're kind of like, ew. Yeah. Like, not like what they're doing, it's just like the cheapness of it. Oh, this movie's so cheap.

It's like, everything's like wet and dusty. I don't know, what is that, what's the movie Cabin? A Serbian film? No, well, it's a Serbian film, yeah. But no, that's like the go-to. No, the one with the homeless people are getting in the goop and they're like melting. Oh, street trash. Street trash is a disgusting movie that I couldn't get through.

That was like, how many times can I watch a human being like crumble into Nickelodeon Gack? Yeah. And, you know, they just had like cheap screaming sound effects. Like the one mutant in Robocop. That's that whole movie I can't get through Dead Alive The old lady eating the soup And the face goes in the soup

It's one of those things where I just I can't look at soup sometimes I can't look at soup sometimes I might see an old man eating soup I'm like get out of here sir I don't want to need it with you It's a Peter Jixon movie I watched like half of that movie

With my grandmother And I was like I should change this Yeah I should change this Probably Wait did you get to the old lady Eating her face in the soup Her face droppings

I don't I think there was stuff with the dog Yeah, there's some dog stuff going on there. I think around the dog stuff. I sensed Granny wasn't feeling it. But this movie's got dog stuff in it, dude. One time when I was a kid, my uncle was visiting, and he was watching one of the Halraiser movies, and I was a little kid.

I was walking around the corner. I was like, wait a second, there's a naked lady on that TV, right? I'm going to see where this goes. Yeah, sure. Oh, wait, now her skin's ripped off of her body, so now I see a fully naked woman that is fully skinless. Yeah. The hottest woman.

Well, it left an imprint on me. Is that the one where she gets eaten by the statue? I didn't stick around. Okay, well, that's the third one. No spoiler. I guess, like, from a kid, I can't remember, like, one where I was like, holy fucking shit. But I will say...

Pictureing, like, a little kid you saying that. Holy fucking shit. The grossest movie, like, the one where I was just like, oh, I got to, like, take seven showers now is Harmony Carrin's trash humpers. Oh, yeah. That thing is difficult to get through. on almost every level and there's a murder in it

so I'll call it horror movie what the fuck it's a horrific movie it's really disgusting and like all like the old person stuff is like really disturbing yeah yeah

I was terrified of the first lepricon when it came out I was just I thought that that was like the scariest a movie could be because you just have a thing with little people

no it's just it's the sharp the corny jokes yeah no it's just something about it I was like this little goblin's going to bite my ankles

or something man I didn't need it yeah you don't want that The belly pot of gold thing really disturbed me. That was his... His gold vagina? Amir, are you just... Stone-faced, man?

You don't get scared of anything, huh? I'm not that I don't get scared. I purposely avoid horror movies because I don't like being scared. I remember seeing Childs play too young. Oh, that'll do it. Every time. A little dolls screaming Latin

at an 11-year-old boy. I'm just like staring at the movie. It's like, why don't we just watch Lion King? Why is this a good emotion? Because then you have to go back to your own toys later and be like, okay, hey guys, we're all cool, right? Anybody here talk Latin? You throw that my buddy and me right in the garbage after that.

Give each one of your toys a skittles just to pay it off. Please don't steal my soul. I mean, that's really a genius move on that movie's part, though, because not only is it a doll screaming Latin, they're like, who could we get to do this voice? Oh, Brad Durif. He's got one of the most terrifying voices of you. and he's got that Chuckie growl or like this

which is like all of those movies have that it's fucking bone chilling so I totally totally get that scary this shit there's a new one what the fuck is it called the cult of Chuck yeah we're doing the cult now Chuck he's back yeah he's back man and nobody told anybody we just found out about it's apparently been out right I guess I think it's out yeah which is the one where

Chuckie replaces the paintball with real bullets in that game that's Child's Play 3 which we did an episode on a few years ago. It takes place in a military school. Holy shit. There's a fat kid who jumps on a grenade in that movie? Pretty great stuff. It has to be a fat kid. And then it ends in a carnival for some reason. Yeah, sure.

All right, so this is the last one. Steve Sadek. All right, so I'll read you the title that I wrote down, and then I'll tell you what the real title was, because I printed this at work. The title that I wrote down was Psycho Experience. The title it was sent over

was PsychoBJ experience. Oh, I see. And I didn't want to You don't want to get those caught with those BJs coming out of the printer. That is NSFW for sure. Someone's just printing blowjob stories at work. So why did you leave your last job? I was fired for printing blowjob stories in the community printer. Let me dive right in.

Please do. I lost my virgin. Now, this isn't me talking. This is the writer of the story. Right. Sure. I lost my virginity while my favorite movie was playing in the background. Alfred Hitchcock's Psycho

It was with his mother That's sort of Halloween related By the way This is written by a lady She asked Name was withheld For obvious reasons

I meant her mother Her mother, yes That's sort of Halloween related But for this month's mailbag But the real horror story Happened a few weeks before that Oh it's like a story

Within a story I like this This is some great writing I was starting to date this guy The same one I lost my psycho virginity to. Yeah, you don't want to switch up in just a couple weeks' time. And a few dates in, he invited me over to his place to watch some movies. Everybody knows what that is. Yeah, this is like the pre-netflix and chill.

No. Which I've been told means that. Yes. Right, like Netflix and Chill, like come up and let's get fucking. It just means fucking. Okay. It just means fucking. You don't need Netflix.

No. It's less cute. It doesn't really fit on a T-shirt, just fucking. And most people are doing Hulu anyway, come on. Wait, he doesn't have a Netflix account. Now, I was naive and hadn't dated much, so I had no idea what the code was for something else. When we get to his place,

he excuses himself to use the restroom while I was given a task to choose the movie from his collection. I noticed Disney's Hercules and decided to pop that on. This is the one that's animated with, like, doesn't like David Spade do a voice? No, no, this is a... David Spade. That's Emperor's Newport.

Oh, pardon me. This is Tate Donovan. This was Tate Donovan's big jam. Oh, yeah. James Woods is in this, actually. Pre-damages? Yes. James Woods rightfully plays a villain.

That works. He plays 80s himself. I see his animated chest vagina. I noticed he had, after all, we bonded over our extreme love of Disney when we first met. When he came back from the restroom, he looked at me quizzically, but just shrugged.

He made his way half into the movie, and we got to kissing and touching. Made his move halfway through. I'm sorry. Very important. I apologize. He made his move halfway through the movie, and we got to kissing and touching. I was so eager to finally get close to swiping my V card.

Now, that's an interesting use there, swiping. I thought you get rid of your V card. Yeah, you get rid of it. You drop it. But swiping implies that you're also going to then use it later. You're opening a virginity checking account. Overdraft fee. That was dumb.

And decided to unzip his pants. I don't think I have to say what happened next. But you better. While we were really getting heavy, one of the cutesy songs of the movie started to play. Aren't they all cutesy? It's a Disney animated film. It was...

Be prepared! Oh, yeah, actually, you're right. Jeremy Irons singing that song with a bunch of Nazi as kainas. I think this was... Hercules specifically had a bunch of Motown kind of backup singers going on. Did it really? Here we go.

Kind of stuff like that. Oh, really? Yeah, so that's... Wait, what was it like? I'm not doing that again. It doesn't want to do it. It was one of my favorites, so I found myself humming along while also performing the dirty deed. Hence the Hummer.

Mm-hmm. I think I was so caught up in the music that I didn't notice my teeth sunk into him. Oh. What? He obviously jumped back and cried out in pain. Obviously. He clutched himself in the corner for some. sometime while I was mortified

and started crying and having a panic attack oh come on while we were both a mess luckily we were both a mess luckily I didn't bite too hard and we actually found ourselves getting back into the deed later that you came

back from crying dude like not for nothing I mean like yeah it sucks that she bit whatever but like how do you come back from crying whilst a blowjob and a panic attack I think what the solution was they put on Little Mermaid It just got fun again. Fancy free.

Under the sheets. Darling, it's better down where it's weather. It's all right there. I'm happy to say we're still together a few years after this incident and now find it funny. Wow, pulled through. That's amazing. We also love to quote your Batman versus Two Man Dawn of Justice episode together. Thank you so much.

My question is, do you guys have any stories? of movies during sex that have gone embarrassingly horribly wrong or whatever. We do not. Thank you so much for listening. Yeah, thank you so much. Great much, guys.

Again, we're all waiting to lose our virginities here. I'm waiting to swipe that V-card, man. Someday, it's like chip-enabled at this point. Oh, right. The chip card, it's harder to put in now. Yeah, but easier to protect your identity. It takes a little longer, which is good, I guess. Yeah, I only have a virginity savings account.

It's not a checking. I still can't get over, like, weeping in front of someone, and then, like, getting back into cool guy mode to make it go around like that. I think it took hours. They probably went out to get a meal. They shower. Yeah. There's a lot of things that are left out.

It's a real, like, span of time kind of thing. Because you can't just... Hercules wasn't still on when that resumed. I'm also... Having a panic attack while Hercules is in the background is just a really funny image. I just feel like hooking up during a movie. movie, you don't want to, cartoons are out. Cartoons are totally out of the question.

Well, she's saying she didn't know what the score was here. But let's settle the score. I think you want a boring movie. Like a sort of courtroom drama is kind of where you want to be. The Pelican Brief? The Pelican Brief, I think it's a perfect choice. Because there's just a lot of like research going on. And that's the time we can't really hum along to that.

No, you cannot. There's a couple of James Woods courtroom dramas. I think you can sneak in there too. Horror isn't even that great either because then it's like, are you being aroused by the violence or what is happening. The answers, yeah. The answer is absolutely, yes. Well, that's WHM Mailbag for this October, everybody.

Thanks for tuning in as always. And thank you so much from here for hanging out. Thank you for having me. We appreciate it. Thanks for being on HeadGum. We really appreciate having you guys here. You have a very nice studio here in Los Angeles. Hey, whenever you guys are willing to make the move, this studio is open available to you

guys whenever you want. So please come back soon. Sounds awesome. For more WHM, check out WHMpodcast.com or find us over at HeadGum. Until next time, I'm Andrew Jupin, Chris Cabin. Stephen Sadek. Eric Siska. I'm here Blumenfeld here, reporting for duty.

Take it easy. I'm so sorry about that. We all go a little mad sometimes. You know, it's Halloween. I guess everyone's a title of one good scare. Sometimes. That is murder. Zombies have entered the building.

They're at the door. They're coming in. It is time to keep your appointment with the Wickham. They're coming to get you, Barbara. These sick fucks you've seen one too many movies. Now, Sid, don't you blame the movies? Movies don't create psychos. Movies make psychos.

More creative! Put the fucking lotion in the bag! But an excellent day for an exorcism. That was a HitGum podcast.