Wednesdays - 100: It's our 100th episode! | FOLLOW UP SPECIAL!

Episode Date: March 15, 2023

It’s our 100th episode- we can’t believe it! Thank you ALL so much for listening and sending in your dilemmas every week. We love you all! This week be prepared for some JUICY follow up dilemmas! This week we were drinking Delacourt Brut Champagne from M&S to celebrate 100 episodes!Sophie Rating: 10/10Melissa Rating: 10/10 Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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Register by March 15th. Additional terms apply. learn more at wealthsimple.com slash match fanduel casino's exclusive live dealer studio has your chance at the number one feeling winning which beats even the 27th best feeling saying i do who wants this last parachute i do enjoy the number one feeling winning in an exciting live dealer studio, exclusively on FanDuel Casino, where winning is undefeated. 19 plus and physically located in Ontario. Gambling problem? Call 1-866-531-2600 or visit connectsontario.ca. Please play responsibly. melissa are you a doctor uh i want to be but i'm not i'm not a doctor either and we're not

psychologists and we're not experts in anything in fact we just chatted all the shit so and we love giving you guys advice but as we love giving you guys advice do not take what we're saying as gospel if you do feel like you need to speak to somebody please seek professional help We love giving you guys advice. But as we said. We love giving you guys advice. Do not take what we're saying as gospel. If you do feel like you need to speak to somebody, please seek professional help. Shiver my timbers, guys. It's our 100th episode. Surely we have to redo that. Shiver my timbers.

I don't think we did. Guys, it's the 100th episode. Guys, it's the bloody 100th. Do you remember back in the day, sat at my kitchen table? I was so far. We'd never have dinner with each other afterwards. I'd go off with Jamie to Whole Foods, walk, our daily walk. You know, or you'd go to Planet Organic and get that turkey.

Do you remember? Or that chicken. What are you on about? What chicken? You loved going to Planet Organic. There was some specific something that you'd buy from Planet Organic. What was it? I can't remember. I think it was a roasted turkey or breast or a chicken breast or something no it wasn't i can't think and you'd go

off for a cryo so yeah i'd go off for a cryo and i'd go and i'd walk because it was the only thing open yeah i'd walk walk walk walked so many steps during covid i really did and then we'd walk back and we would i'd be a bit drunk i'd have my dinner. Jamie wouldn't be drunk because we'd have polished our bottle of wine. Sometimes we'd open a second one. God, we would really get drunk in the air.

It was like, yeah, I'm mad. Don't you ever know how we made any sense? We finished like a bottle. Oh yeah, the whole time.

What was the worst one? I think it was that jam shed that really sent us west. No, that was because you'd just broken up with Harry and you were honestly the size of a pea.

Like, you were so skinny. I was like, Melissa, and you had one sip and you were like, oh. My adrenaline was so high, I just couldn't eat. You know, you're too excited to eat Harry and you were honestly the size of a pea like you were so skinny I was like Melissa and you had one and you were like my adrenaline was so high I just couldn't eat

you know you were too excited to eat and you had to lie down on my sofa I was like just take a breath you brought me something to eat specifically and you gave me a dirolyte

I gave you a dirolyte I was like you need electrolytes and you pushed your sofa in like no it wasn't like nerves it was just like excitement no but there's a point I can't say that you're breaking out of their world.

No, no. I was excited for being single all the time. It was a new lease of life for me. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It really was. Popping bottles in the club. Woo. Because it's our 100th birthday.

100th episode. And this is also a really cute mini little bottle of Prosecco. Is it champagne or Prosecco? Champagne de la Cour. Don't let it go into that light and then smash everywhere. It's an Evanesce project of France. I'm so sorry, guys. It's champagne.

Guys, also, just a huge thank you to everyone who's been listening for 100 episodes. We love you so much. You are the best. Pop goes the weasel. You guys are the absolute best. We feel like we've got such a lovely little family with you, our little tiny whinies. And we couldn't love you more. There's a lovely glasses we've got as well.

I hope you guys are all drinking with us. Wait to listen to the episode till like a Saturday and then sit down and have a drink with us. No, just do it on a Monday. Nothing wrong with having a drink.

On a Wednesday, you silly old bean. Do it on a Wednesday. Why are we on Monday? Our episode goes out on a Wednesday. Lovely, lovely. Do you know what the name

of our podcast is? Yes, Wine on Wednesdays. Wednesdays we do I had a I had a 30th not a 30th I had like I don't know how old Georgie LaRue is anyway but I had her birthday on Friday and then I had a birthday on Friday and then I had a hendy on Saturday so I'm feeling a bit jaded today because it is Monday when we're recording this. So excuse me if I get my words a little bit tangled up because you know how that happens to me. That happens even when you haven't had a heavy week.

Sophie's finding everything extra funny today for no reason. We said it was cold in here and they were like, we're going to turn the heating up. Sophie thought it was the funniest thing she's ever heard. It was very odd. I was like, are you okay? Right, well, anyway, guys. We asked you lovely listeners what your love languages were because we're speaking about ours oh yeah the other day we were speaking

about that yeah yeah i feel like we're interesting discussion also we've got to say that we like to buy people things oh yeah we're proper gift givers we are do it all the time not to jamie though i don't care to buy him so much just because he's got everything yeah and he's very ungrateful in excess in excess yeah he has like five of the same t-shirt and you're like what yeah yeah five of everything yeah yeah six of the same shoe i so i feel you guys bizarre it's bizarre also so if he likes it i also think we are words of affirmation like we compliment each other a lot oh yeah yeah we compliment other people a lot too yeah yeah gorgeous okay right so i want to hear what yours are okay 100 words of affirmation tell me how great i am

i feel you i don't need that but i also think i was saying this to you the other day as well i think i do if we didn't have it then we would probably be like i feel a bit shit about myself i don't know it would probably affect us more than we think because we are we're lucky and we have it a lot from both our boyfriends are very complimentary too yeah yeah yeah i one of my exes was not not peep and it really does get you down it does get you down you really do lose your confidence so that's um one teenagers okay acts of service weird but when he takes the hair out of my hair brush oh my god quite sweet i don't love acts of service i don't think i'm an acts of service person but then toby like cooks me dinner quite a lot jamie's a big act like he does so much so much acts of service

yeah and i love it toby is not like jamie will like open the door for you on the way out yeah yeah toby i have to tell him to do certain things oh sorry doesn't think oh, sorry. Doesn't think about it. Oh, but he's still young. And also he's the youngest of the siblings. I think people have always done that for him. So then he doesn't think to do it. I have to train him. Also, as a service, like Jamie just likes to do things. Like he's in control. It's just in his genetics to do it. It's in his genetics to do it. So I'm like, oh, C'est la vie. I love that. You're quite good at access service.

Are you joking? No, like when I was bad,'re like we're gonna do this this and this I'm gonna do this for you I'm gonna do that for you and you'd like make me nice dinners and lunches and stuff yeah I'm quite good but also not good I am for like my friends but not so if someone will do it for me I will not lift a finger but if they don't I'm also really then you'll do it yeah like I don't need I can do everything perfectly by myself but I will let someone do it for me same I just love being princess oh my god someone said returning my asos parcels for me oh my god I would literally oh my god that is a job in itself to do something the returning of the parcels I'm like I'll return that three months go by no it's

like it's one of my biggest things like I cannot physically return why is it such a pain because to like put the label on and go to like this oh store we're so lazy it's no i'm frightening okay physical touch not touching me i assume you hate me yeah i agree yeah i feel that i agree i like physical touch all the time and someone can massage my feet my feet oh my god that's my favorite thing in the time my feet hurt so much because we walk so much really yeah i had a massage last night it was lovely i don't like i find it hard to have a pedicure without my feet going like... I literally like spring the foot away. I'm like, don't touch my feet.

Right. Dilemma follow-ups. We know that you love it. We know I love it. We live for this shit. I live for this shit. I'm so excited. Because this is our 100th episode we do something

a little bit more special and we've got some follow-ups for some really good juicy dilemmas that we had that were our favorites and you guys have given us follow-ups so here we go okay so here's a recap of the dilemma what we thought then we'll give you the update hi girls I've got quite the dilemma that I'd love your help with. So a few months ago, I was on a night out with my girls and ended up drinking quite a lot and went home with an attractive guy. Stunning. Stunning. We both made it clear to the other that this would only be a one night stand,

which I've never done before, as I'm not looking for a relationship at the moment. Wait, hold on, how does that conversation go? This is just a shag. I'm not expecting anything further from you. Yeah. Is that a conversation you have to have no surely surely you just do it everyone knows that's the situation yeah just now then and now he was a nice enough guy a bit too laddish for me and the sex was mediocre at best

but i guess it's it's scratched that's really good i left that same night and he called and paid for my uber home we parted way parted ways very nicely and wished the other one well and never swapped numbers or social so we didn't feel it was necessary fast forward six weeks later i'm oh my god fast fast forward six weeks later i'm in fact pregnant fair to say it was a big shock as this took the morning as i took the morning after pill after he practically refused to wear a condom. Oh no, after he practically refused to wear a condom and I feel a bit too awkward to demand it. I know, not a very strong woman of me. But nevertheless, my period was late and I am in fact pregnant. Oh my god, this is really quite the dilemma. I have a really good career, a stable

home that's my own and I'm in a good place to have a baby even though I'm only 23. After thinking long and hard, I've made the decision to have the baby on my own'm only 23. After thinking long and hard I've made the decision to have the baby on my own. I'm emotionally mentally and financially able and ready to bring up a child into the world right now however I haven't told the guy about the baby. At first it was because I literally had no way to contact him but after my best friend did some Facebook stalking she found his best friend online so now I have a point of contact however I still haven't contacted him. I don't want money from him or to force him to be a part of the baby's life if it's not what he wants and I really don't think it's something that he would want he's young single lad who

didn't want a girlfriend let alone a baby I also don't want to contact him for him to decide he wants to be dad for the fun parts and then cut out and run when shit gets hard later on i don't know i so get that i want to protect my baby and feel it's best not to let him know we live hours away in completely different towns from each other and have no mutual friends so it's not like we're going to bump into each other but is it wrong of me to keep this information from him any advice would be greatly appreciated p.s i've just found out it's a girl today and you guys are technically the first ones to know oh my god i've got goose pimples congratulations i'm so happy for you that you want to go and embark on this amazing wonderful

journey proud as well like for me incredible it's such a legend i do though think you have a moral duty to tell someone if it's half their baby you've got to give people the options like you've got to give people free will you've got to give that dad the option to be like he might grow up and be like i wanted to be involved like completely involved like that's my child too i don't think you can take that option but then but then there's i so agree with you but then there's also the part so like if he's 23 years old right and he doesn't want a girlfriend he's happy being a single lad. You've got to give him the option.

Would he, if he doesn't want to be a dad, would he then feel horrendous for the rest of his life, knowing he's got a kid out there, but he doesn't want a relationship with him? Would that ruin his life more than him being oblivious? Still got to give him the option. Like, it's not your... If it was you, what would you do? I would tell him. I could not... What if he didn't know anything about the guy he had like i don't know what if he was definitely not the type of man you would want if then i would like take it

to social stuff or whatever you do take it to lawyers or whatever and be like i don't want him involved in the baby's life but i think you can't make that decision you know it's like one of those things it's like you've got to give people the free will he's like a grown adult he knows he has choice of his own actions like you know he he should have the choice to be able to be like I want to be involved or not I would dig into his life as much as I could from social yeah get a bit of a background obviously knowing that you're going to tell him at some point get in contact and let him know this information I would also go and get some legal advice and be like look if this is the scenario if I don't want the child's father to be in my life after I meet him and like I it turns out to be a wrong decision I've let him know yeah

what can I do blah blah blah great advice I so agree and also you know he refused to put a fucking condom on so sorry yeah what the fuck's that about he's obviously well at least you're getting a gorgeous a gorgeous little girl out of this i can't wait please what a blessing and as you say you're in the perfect position to raise a child alone regardless to him so please keep us updated yeah follow up with us please please please please okay so the update is oh my god firstly thank you so much for your advice i really really appreciated it and completely agreed with everything you said okay interesting i spoke to a lawyer slash solicitor to see what advice i could get there and they strongly advised to have him sign over his parental rights if he didn't want to be involved just in case

therefore i did contact him and asked to meet up he was hesitant at first but agreed when i proposed to meet at the city of his hometown so he wouldn't have to travel far we met in public because i just thought in case things go a bit sour there'll be people around at first he got a bit nasty and angry saying i did it this on purpose and i was trying to trap him i was after his money but i explained everything and how i wasn't forcing him to be there and didn't want any money from him he calmed down a bit but was obviously still very shocked after sitting in silence for a little while he seemed to understand that I was serious about not forcing him to be involved and he told me he didn't want anything to do with the baby which I understood and accepted

oh my god fuck he said he signed over his rights once he got a solicitor to look over the paperwork and he told me that he didn't have a generational health disease that ran in his family in case i needed to know which i thought was sweet he asked me not to tell him anything about the baby because he didn't want to know anything at all and i promised that once we parted ways i would never contact him again but also that once my baby got older i couldn't and wouldn't stop her from trying to find him as she wanted to and he seemed to understand where i was coming from he wished me luck and gave me a tight hug before we left and i honestly felt so relieved knowing that i did everything i should have done i don't be able to give my baby all the answers she deserves when she's older and i know i have no regrets now i'm almost halfway through my pregnancy

now and i'm so excited and at peace with where my life is and all the decisions i've made thanks so much my girls love from me oh my god I'm so happy for you I'm so proud of you you're never gonna have like any regrets like I have four goosebumps over my face why is that sad but it's so lovely it's kind of sad but also I think it's the outcome that she would have wanted yeah same so I think in like every way she's like you know I've spoken to the dad he's like signed everything over like I'm well within my legal rights to raise this baby alone now without him suddenly deciding one day I want to be a part of the baby's life in five years do you know what I mean yeah you've done everything right by the book and you're gonna have this gorgeous little baby girl please send us photos when you

do and give us updates I'm so excited also do we know if it's a baby girl? Oh, yeah, I do. I'm so excited for you. Congratulations. We're so proud of you. You definitely did the right thing. And you're going to be a fantastic mother. Follow-up two, about the girl whose boyfriend had told her he was going to his family home for the weekend and tells her he was on a drunken plane to Barcelona

with another girl. Scandal. Do you remember it? I remember this, remember this yeah okay here's the recap i've been seeing a guy since last august we met on tinder and it was amazing around feb this year he freaked out as when we had met he'd only just got out of a 10-year relationship three weeks before our tinder date which i knew when we met but anyway i'd fallen head over heels and was so in love two weeks ago he said he was going back home which is in scarborough we both live in leeds area the friday night i messaged how's home blah blah blah and he said just sat drinking my dad

sorry babe didn't text fine he'd be like that boys can something didn't sit right i looked his instagram and he'd followed this in skull who had 12k followers she then followed him back so i watch her story and she's on a drunken plane to barcelona i hear a northern boy and thought is this him now don't be silly i message him and he tells me he's spending his saturday with his mates and about to head out then quiet which is unlike him as i usually get drunk and miss you babe how's your night or a good night text i wake up the anxiety is killing me so i call him and it's an international dial tone the phone then cuts off and i get a message

morning princess i said what's wrong he said nothing cut a long story short i sent a few insecure texts and said i'm heading to him as your plans and it was weird for me to get to his before him I get to his and at this point I'm losing my mind his car is there I message him I'm at yours and then I get I can't see you today I'm in Manchester text me text blocked fuck this I'm going in he's not there so I search his house my stuff is hidden a picture of us is in the drawer my toilet bag under his bed i get on the phone to the girl saying he's defo with her but they're like calm down you're being mad well i messaged him saying i'm not at yours and i'm not leaving he then unblocks me and replies are you still at mine i said yeah and he said i went on a date friday night got drunk we went to manchester and flew

out to barcelona i was fucking right i fill everyone in as he's on his way back, bottle of rosé down and wait for him to walk in. He explains it all, says he thinks he likes her. He's been unsure about our future and he has been on Tinder for a few months. That was apparently his only date that they didn't sleep together. And she just, as she got in a mood with him, we talk calmly, but he at one point tries to kiss me so i get my stuff and leave good i'm hurting because i saw my future with him i'm two weeks in yes getting stronger but my god it physically hurts and the worst part is i'd made i'd been made redundant two weeks before this so i was in a bad place as it was please give me advice i've been through it before i'm 34 but there's pain i've never felt before okay what a story oh my god what a story no no no not calling and it's

you motherfucker oh my god his cup was blown i'm about to meet them in barcelona to be fair like yeah yeah yeah yeah we're all doing this every hotel being like how long have they been together i just want to come two weeks that's exist in how long have they been together two weeks that's what I thought oh they've been together two weeks or they've been broken up two weeks

since last August we've been dating for six months oh wait since last August right so you're I mean you're over it yeah

wow wow that's a shame no that's really a shame and that's not nice that's cheating sorry this is wait so he just

instead of dumping her if he didn't think he just decides to go on tinder and then why is he doing that that is traumatizing like that is literally your trauma your trust is gone like unless you okay cool so depending on funds i would get a therapist if she doesn't have one already just so that this doesn't stick with her like if she can have professional support to get and i'm not even being dramatic like if she can have professional support to get through this then that'll be great so what's the best advice to get a professional help okay so get professional support i would say if she can but you know that's a luxury for some people double down on the self-care if it's just her she needs to again cliche focus on herself she needs to double down on self-care and i don't just mean like the bubble baths and the wine although that's good i mean the the

journaling the writing out how she feels the naming her emotions the speaking about it as well to her friends and again we need to think about her end game because it sounds like she's like i don't know if she's tempted to go back oh. But it doesn't sound like he wants her back. He's now saying he quite likes the other girl and then tried to kiss her. And I hope the other girl can hear that as well. Other girl, he tried to kiss the other girl, just so you know.

Every girl, this guy, if he ever tries to take you to Barcelona, red flag. Red flag, don't do it. So. Scandal. So the follow-up. Hey, girls.

So update on the Barcelona sagaona saga firstly i listened to your podcast religiously but when you released this one i was living my best life in canada so i missed it oh my god she went to canada okay skip a few months forward and what about a place i'm in as this happened to me in august i found out you guys mentioned my heartbreak on the podcast from him oh my god oh my god shut up this is so good I received a message saying I heard the podcast and you really didn't deserve that I'm so sorry someone had heard it and asked him if it was about him so thank you shit no no no no no no also this is like what dreams are made of this is what dreams are made of and I can say I worked on myself. I've started dating again.

I'm honestly so happy. Bagged myself a dream job and life is pretty good. He's not with Barcelona girl anymore, but some other poor girl is with him now. I'm honestly fine and thank you. Because listening to that again and hearing your response, I thought, made me realize again, it wasn't my fault. Oh my God, we love you.

We love you. I'm so proud you're a boss bitch oh she goes to canada then to live her best life no regret this is sorry this is the best thing we've ever i think we've ever read on the podcast i know that because that first story the dilemma itself was wild level and then the fact that he listened to it someone knew but it's also the fact that someone told him like i think that you're mentioned on this podcast and then he's listened to it and you know what then he's realized how much of a twat he was and messaged you and apologized.

And too late. You've moved on. You're in Canada living your best life. Bag yourself a hottie and a great job. Does she bag herself a hottie? Don't know, but she bags herself a great job. And she's dating and having a lovely, lovely time. All these lovely Canadians.

Is she living in Canada? I think she was just in Canada when our episode aired. I think that's what she's saying. So she missed it. But she living in Canada? I think she was just in Canada when our episode aired. I think that's what she's saying. So she missed it. But she sounds either way like she's having a fucking ball. She is having... It's also the thought of like

you just sat in his flat with a bottle of wine like, yeah. Yeah, right. You're putting what's in. Yeah. I can imagine us doing that. Me being like,

no. You're dead to me. Also, as he's traveling back from Barcelona, i know how calling every time you're telling them do you know what he's done to me he's so i promise you won't sweet him promise so i'll be like i'd be like never look at him again oh my god it's too good you're a legend we love you and um update us on your next dating please dilemma or even just a lovely story of you meeting a new guy I'd love to hear about it yeah

I'm invested in this story now I'm invested in you also kind of want to name and shame this guy do you know what I mean Scarborough lad give us a picture we will put him out

and tell you not to date him slash no we won't but yeah we'd love to but I don't think we're going to do that okay right we'll be allowed okay so because

I feel like this I live for this stuff so does Sophie the follow ups are just the best if you guys feel like you could do that more, give us some more follow-ups, we will probably make a whole episode out of it, won't we? Bonus episode.

Oh my God, I'd love that. Hey, you're a Canadian podcast listener and that makes you important to us. We'd like to know more about you, what you think of this podcast, and the other podcasts you'd like to hear. So we put together a super brief survey we'd like you to fill out. Complete it, and we'll give you a chance to win one of three $100 Amazon gift cards. That way, we can say thanks for your opinion. Just go to mypodcastsurvey.ca and have your say. That's mypodcastsurvey.ca and have your say that's mypodcastsurvey.ca this is a fresh dilemma hey girls looking for some advice my work christmas party was last december and i was brand new to the team sorry everyone knows that i'm desperate to go to one

of these work christmas parties why are you so bizarre i'm really excited for this i got ridiculously drunk and the whole night was a complete blur i desperate to go to one of these work Christmas parties. Why are you? I don't know. It's obviously so bizarre. So I'm really excited for this. I got ridiculously drunk and the whole night was a complete blur. I ended up sleeping with one of my new colleagues. This is why. It's always so scandalous. In the morning, I had a bad case of the fear as I woke up with a bit of a... Oh, die. Bit of a fright, putting it lightly.

But he seemed so much more relaxed, offering me to work from his that day to avoid the hangover journey home, offering me his clothes to save me traveling home in my dress and laughing about the night before. Sweet. Sweetness. Sorry, this is, yeah. I made him swear to secrecy as I couldn't bear the thought of making a name for myself so soon after joining the team. The following week, we had a meeting, which was our first encounter since the night,

and he had proceeded to tell me that it was out of character for him implying he doesn't usually have one night stands. He also told me he didn't think I was like that which made me feel a bit judged. Oh, wait, hold on. This is really just on a 180. He then proceeded to ask if I needed to get checked at the clinic.

I was mortified. Oh my god, it's so fucking weird. Since then we have to work with each other almost daily and I thought all awkwardness from the saga had finally been squashed. Oh my God, it's huge. Since then, we have to work with each other almost daily, and I thought all awkwardness from the saga had finally been squashed. Fast forward a few months down the line, I found through another colleague, he is currently in the process of buying a house for this long-term girlfriend.

Oh my God. I feel awful for this girl, as I had no idea. Sorry, why was he allowing her to stay the day? Particularly as they were about to buy a house together. He is moving teams in three weeks so I won't be around him regularly. Do I confront him before he moves teams or

avoid bringing up something that happened months before? To make things more complicated, is it possible he could become my manager in the future as he is more senior than I am and is moving to a department i will likely be moved to any advice would be really appreciated i would literally push it this is a sticky situation i think you're gonna make your we have to be selfish selfish in

this scenario i think you're better off not saying anything i always just say if you don't know the person or the relationship just stay out of it i just i just like i know it's probably more it's really weird to me how he was so nice to you the next day yeah but it's just so cunning that he was so nice to you the next day where was the girlfriend that day if i'm living doesn't she live with him then oh she's on a holiday yeah no it's sickening sickening in their bed together no it's sickening and then he was obviously you know what i don't think that you're gonna be i think if you ever have the first and last person that he's probably gonna do this with if you're buying a house or something you go and do that that's pretty fucked also fuck but he was like do you have any like stds he was obviously that's because he's sketching

out because how can you tell your your like your girlfriend i've given you chlamydia it's like in that film what's it called um the other woman yes the other woman he like slyly like gives his man to be because he's obviously got the clap and he's like oh there's this bug going around you need to take this shit yeah disgusting i would i would like to slip into our dms and tell her i i just feel like he's horrid yeah i know but that's i don't think that's going to do well for her at work could someone else say it so she doesn't get the blame just be like he's horrid yeah I know but I don't think that's going to do well for her at work could someone else say it so she doesn't get the blame

just be like I don't think it will bode well for you at work I think we have to be selfish we have to think of number one in this scenario all he's done is think about his fucking self

you do the same thing you didn't sleep with this guy knowing he had a girlfriend you're really upset and like you're a good person so I think that the truth will always come out

like he'll do it with someone else and then the girlfriend will find out about it seriously and if he doesn't then maybe you've just got to give someone like the benefit of the doubt that maybe it was just a really drunken mistake people do make mistakes this is a big one but then you know what the rad flag to me is like fine people do make mistakes but it's the next day when he was so nice like do you want some of my clothes like he's fucking kidding me but also maybe he was like trying to like also where was the girlfriend's live-in stuff?

I know. Surely you would have seen it in the bathroom. This is what's so weird. Is it premeditated? What do you mean? As in, did he like think, I'm going to shag someone tonight. I'm going to hide all my girlfriend's stuff in the house.

Or maybe he like has a, like a flat share and he slept in like the house. Or you know what, maybe he doesn't actually live with his girlfriend yet and they've been together for so long and they're going to move in. Still have a toothbrush would be there. Yeah, that's so true.

If like they're moving in together. Oh. That's a lie. It's not right. Maybe he would just drunk and didn't see. Or because she was on holiday all her bathroom stuff wasn't in the bathroom. He's a sly, sly fox.

We don't like this guy but you've got to protect yourself. You've got to protect yourself at the end of the day. If you didn't work with him I'd be saying differently. Oh, 100%. Right, so basically you guys have written into us a lot about what our opinion on boyfriends watching porn is and it's really hard one because would i like to see jamie watching porn no but

would i think it's a dumbable offense no no i just would like to you actually spoke about this on your nearly west podcast that yeah well you guys were like you've been been together like what like a year or something yeah and then one of your friends saw porn on jamie's yes or porn on jamie's and I was like she like was flicking through like he was showing her something on the internet she like sometimes goes on to the next tab and she was like oh I remember that happening at the time and I was like oh my god and boy did I embarrass him and he was so humiliated yeah like at the end. And I was like, oh my God. And boy, did I embarrass him. And he was so humiliated.

But like at the end of the day. Boys will be boys. I think it's one thing every night them locking themselves in the bathroom. Oh my God, yes. Watching porn, having a wank, then not sleeping with you. That's fucking gross.

That's a big deal. But at the end of the day, like some boys are, have a very strong sex drive. At the end of the day, if you don't live with them and you're not there, like they're gonna watch porn probably.

They're gonna probably watch porn. Like it's gonna gonna happen but i'm just gonna read what this is just wanted to see what you guys felt about your partner watching porn i've talked to so many girls about it and everyone seems to feel like it's been normalized so much but at the end of the day i hate the idea of my boyfriend getting off looking at another woman would love to hear your thoughts on this i'm the same like yeah getting off to like watching girl on girl porn or like another couple fucking yeah it's just so vulgar and i don't know if this it does upset me deeply yeah but then i it's one of those things it's it's your outside do you think your boyfriend never wanks like yeah they're gonna do it like some girls are like no no my boyfriend

never does unless we're having sex it's like would they do i'm it like some girls are like no no my boyfriend never does unless we're having sex it's like would they do i'm sorry but they do girls listen to me now they do yeah i also think girls do like in the same scenario girls i don't think they have the same like they don't get off from porn in the same way that guys do necessarily you are like but girls will like each other and you're having sex every day like and your boyfriend then is yeah like that is different but if you are like you know on holiday or you're having sex every day like and your boyfriend then is watching porn like that is different but if you are like you know on holiday

or you're not there or like you're not you're not there for a week he's gonna probably watch porn two or three times like it's gonna happen or at least once

like it's gonna happen but also I also think like sometimes ignorance is bliss like I kind of don't want to know if Toby's watched it or not I'm not stupid but like

I'd rather not know I would rather not like in my mind even though I know i would rather not like in my mind i see even though i know i would rather say no yeah and i also do think it's very circum it's circumstantial i also just don't believe it but i know it's too like in my mind i'm like of course he doesn't how was i out of mind but like i think there's a fine line and it is all down to like circumstances as sophie said like if you're on holiday naturally they're gonna wank and probably watch a bit of porn like but like girls watch porn as well girls do and also

girls will use like a vibrator or something if they're not seeing their boyfriend yeah some girls i know have watched porn and they're like so shocked that i haven't like it's just yeah it's just i don't know enough i wish like i watched porn all the time i have watched a few bits of porn when i was younger for educational purposes before I'd had sex to like understand what a blowjob was. Do you know what I mean? Like it was purely for those reasons. Mine was blocked on my phone because my dad used to pay for my like it was on his business

account. Do you know what I mean? I don't even know how I managed to watch it. So mine was blocked like all, he probably got notified every time I tried to search it. Not that I was like doing it. I was doing it for educational reasons too. Yeah, it was educational purposes.

Like how do I get really, like, how do I know what this is and what this means and like what this looks like? God, I really don't know how I taught myself. It's weird, isn't it? It's almost just like it's instinct. Well, I mean, it's like not that difficult to know what it is and what.

Yeah, true. So there's not that many like buttons that's there on a boy. No, no, very true. There's no buttons really on a boy, is there? No. It's more like they would need to watch porn more than we do. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

You're so right. So that might be why. Like, give them a... You know, look at it that way. Like, maybe it makes them better at sex. I also think it depends on what kind of porn they're watching. Because there is porn that's, like, quite unrealistic to what normal sex is like. And then they have this bizarre expectation of, like...

Yeah. What a vagina's like. No, as in, like, what sex is like. And some boys can get quite, like yeah what a vagina is like no as in like what sex is like in some boys can get quite like violent thinking that girl's gonna love it because they've watched it on porn oh yeah like and you're like what the fuck are you doing i've never had that happen to me but yes yeah a lot of that sort of thing happens but i don't think this is like if i walked in the bathroom or like wherever like in my mind just like where what when would jamie do that but if i walked in and

saw jamie giving himself oh my god i've never been in the house you'd be sick i would be like that is then like you're kicked out the house yeah i would be like i'm not speaking to you for three days you're that's the ick yeah like that's repulsive it's just vulgar it's a bit to me right that's just my opinion but like i don't want to know so if you've seen it like if jamie's doing it and like not turning off his app when i found it i'd be like are you fucking okay but if i just like if you don't know and you're just still like i still never want you to watch porn like then then listen let me give you a scenario yeah i was with toby last night i've been with him all week if i get home to home to, I'm not seeing him tonight.

We're having a night off. If I was going to his tonight and I look at something on his phone and I suddenly see porn, I would be mortified because I'd be like, we've been together all week. I was with you last night.

I was with you this morning and I'm going to be like, what's wrong with me? I'm a real life person that you can shag. Why would you rather look at people on the phone? Do you know what I mean?

Yeah. I just think boys like cover up. Just don't, like you don't want to know if the girl goes to loo. We don't want to know if you watch porn. Have some fucking respect. Like cover your tracks. Yeah.

And it kind of goes back to this OnlyFans thing. Like, is that okay? Technically, I don't know. Like it's a weird fine line. For me, it would definitely not be. No, like if that's like a dumb. But then if they're looking at just photos of someone on OnlyFans

and not having conversations with them, is that then okay? Like this is such an interesting topic. I feel like we could have a whole podcast session. Could I think about this? I need to go away and think about it because I probably live in my denial. I just don't want to know.

So guys, I want you to write in about your porn dilemmas. Have you found them? OnlyFans, what your thoughts are. What dilemmas when you found situations or if you're thinking about it or if they've mentioned it we want to know it all and we can deep dive

into this topic 100% I'm really interested bride or bridezilla so guys I went to a hen last weekend and

I'm just going to give you a lowdown of it so I am a bridesmaid and she's one of my bridesmaids my best friend Izzy and it was her London hen and it was very like you know civilized parents were like her mom her auntie came stepmom came you know the drill lovely we ride you went to the ivy and soho it was so lovely we got there at 11 30 to upset up the table her maid of honor like nailed it like

honestly she'd done such a good job holly we all had glasses of champagne and then it was rose lovely lunch then we played games then we had cocktails especially martinis and bacchantes with a little cocktail guy came in and made them the drunken jockeys those people and then we all went to for lovely pizzas and more drinking more wholesomeness yeah it was a wholesome, wholesome, wholesome, gorgeous time. Lovely. Okay, right, I'm going to rate this Prosecco, and I feel really bad for champagne. Ten out of ten. Ten out of ten, because it's our 100th episode. Yeah.

Delicor. And it's super cute, because it's small. And it's so stunning, and it's dry, and it's gorgeous, and it's perfect. Perfect for just a little glass each, glass and a half each, stunning. Yeah. Bye, guys.

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Call 1-866-531-2600 or visit connectsontario.ca. Please play responsibly. That's it for this week, Wednesdays. But God, don't you just fancy some more, Melissa? Yeah, I'd really love a follow-up to some of those dilemmas. I want to know what happens.

Well then, tinies, we have got some news for you. We have launched a premium version of Wednesdays. Now listen, subscribers get access to the podcast ad free with bonus episodes. It's pretty amazing. It's also packed full of dilemma follow ups, which we love, and some of our more personal stories and recommendations. And it's super easy. You just listen on your favorite app. How cool is that? Amazing. And all the info is in the episode description and in our Insta bio.