Wednesdays - 63. Ruby Adler chats ‘Made in Chelsea’ and spills the TEA on the new season
Episode Date: December 4, 2024Heyyy Tinies,Guess who’s back this week? Melissa is joined by the fabulous Ruby Adler (aka Tiny Tim). Ruby dishes on all the behind-the-scenes drama of the latest season of ‘Made In Chelsea’, an...d also offers a sneak peek at what we can expect from the gang when they go back to filming in January.The girls also tackle a heated debate: would you rather your man call another girl "princess" or "good girl"? And what about their baby name lists—are they timeless classics or a little out of left field?For this week’s dilemmas, things get real. The girls get into a jaw-dropping revelation about a family member who, wait for it, stole money from her! How do they think the Tiny should handle it? All we can say is sometimes putting yourself first is the only way forward. And, of course, they couldn’t skip over another Tiny boyfriend failing to deliver in the gift-giving department.Want More?! Check out our premium subscription The Follow Up - AD FREE, BONUS EPS and ALL the goss wednesdays.supercast.com/If you have one or a dilemma, any personal advice for another Tiny, or a follow up to a dilemma? You can send us a voice note or message using the link here.--Instagram | https://www.instagram.com/wednesdayspodcast/TikTok | https://www.tiktok.com/@wednesdayspodcastEmail | wednesdays@jampotproductions.co.uk--Credits:Producer & Editor: @ben_johnsAssistant Producer: @gurlinaheer_Exec: @jemimarathbone and Holly NewsonVideo editor: @jakeji.pVideo editor: @lizziemccarthySocial: @laurabcoughlan Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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Please play responsibly. Melissa are you a doctor uh I want to be but I'm not I'm not a doctor either and we're not
psychologists and we're not experts in anything in fact we just chatted all the shit so and we
love giving you guys advice but as we love giving you guys advice do not take what we're saying as
gospel if you do feel like you need to speak to somebody please seek professional help We love giving you guys advice. But as we said, we love giving you guys advice. Do not take what we're saying as gospel.
If you do feel like you need to speak to somebody, please seek professional help.
Coming up on this week's episode of Wednesdays, I'm joined by my friend Ruby Adler,
who's going to help us out with some dilemmas.
And she's talking about all things me and Chelsea.
We've got a big dilemma.
We've got a tiny who found out her family member had stolen a lot of money from her and it's having serious repercussions.
As well as chatting about another dilemma from a tiny who's frustrated about her boyfriend's
lack of gift giving. Is he just being a guy's guy or is there something else going on?
Let's get into the episode.
Hey guys, welcome back to Wednesdays. We've got the one and only Ruby Adler with us today.
Timmy!
Oh my god, it feels really good to be back.
To Timmy, when was the last time you god, it feels really good to be back. Timmy,
when was the last time you were on?
Actually quite recently,
to be fair.
Do you know what?
That feels like it was yesterday,
but I think that was like the summer.
I was in a little grey skimpy dress.
Was it August? When we spoke about,
I wanted to call him T-Pain.
August.
That's really bad.
The love of my life.
Mind blank.
Are you talking about Sench?
That's the one.
I know exactly who he is.
That was such a weird mind blank.
I can't believe it was that long ago.
Time flies.
Time flies, guys.
What's been going on with you?
Lovely long nails.
I did just have them done yesterday.
They look fresh.
Got a new little nail salon opposite my flat, which I really like.
I was telling you about it.
Oh, yeah.
They're just quick and they're good and they're efficient.
Do they use gel bottle?
What do they use?
Well, this is Biab.
But not the gel bottle one?
Not the gel bottle.
Okay, which one?
I don't know.
I'd need to find out.
But I'm looking at your nails and I actually think it's quite appealing.
They look clean and these look great now because they're fresh and I got them done yesterday.
They look stunning.
But after about five or six days, one goes and they just don't look as polished.
I don't know how you've...
I have never
in my life of having by up ever had a broken nail and you always break one and I don't know how
you like opening packages with them and shit yeah I'm doing everything so with mine I think you
obviously have to go to a really good place for a start and I think which you do but having strong
nails underneath like using a good like cuticle etc but also not having them
too long like just don't have them too long they're not very practical I think I've become
I've got nail blindness this is the thing because I really don't think they're that long but they
are actually quite long good like this yeah you see how much further over your finger that's when
you can tell this little guy and that's the one that always breaks yeah it's always the fake one
oh my god okay well isn't that telling you something?
Put a finger down if you should get short nails.
You really need to just get them short.
I know.
I need to just...
You've got long nail beds, too.
In the new year.
New year, new me.
They're going to come off.
We're going to have a refresh.
We're going to start again.
I like their nails.
She's got the new road peptide lip.
Do you know what?
I really want the espresso one.
I know, it's quite gorgie.
But I've got the iPhone 16 at home, sitting at home.
I just haven't done the swap over yet because it's such a mission.
I know, it's such a mission.
Also, can we tell the story about what happened to Emily Champion with that phone case?
So she was like, got the brand new Rode phone case when her first camera came out.
She's like, oh my God, I'm so cool.
Like she's on the bus.
What happened? I don't know.
And she's walking past some like 16 year olds who were-olds who were, like, looking at her phone case
and then just, like, laughed at her, like,
you're lame.
And she was like...
Sorry, why?
Is it not cool?
Well, I don't know.
To us, it's cool,
but I'm like, to the young, young, young kids of the world,
probably not.
Probably Hayley Bieber's probably a bit lame.
I don't know.
She's not lame, Timothy.
Well, not to us.
To us, she's a goddess.
I thought I was, like, one of the cool kids, like got the road case.
Those 17-year-olds that will be laughing at you when you get on the bus.
I just really like her.
She just loves it.
Everything she puts her name to.
I know, I know.
She's phenomenal.
Everything she wears, I want.
She's so cool.
Does anyone know what that baby looks like?
Have we had a peek at that?
She called him Jack.
I think it's quite nice.
Jack Blues.
I think it's cute. Cute? I also don't like it when celebrities sometimes call them oh my god have you seen
francesca fargis strange names no my god she just had twins she was on too hot to handle she's just
oh my god yes i do of course i do and there's this whole controversy on what she called them
oh my god so she had a boy and a girl okay she called the boy i'd love to know everyone's
thoughts on this yeah she called the boy locket love to know everyone's thoughts on this she called the boy Lockett romance
and she called her daughter
Poetry Lucia
Lockett and Po
Lock and Po
right hold on
we can shorten
Lockett
to just being
Locky
alright
very Essex
I like it
Locky
alright Locky
this is Lockie.
She's nailed the boy's name.
She fucking nailed it.
And then the girl.
It's not what she's going for.
No, I know.
She's not going for the answer.
Like James Lock.
I haven't heard that name in so long.
Me either.
Does he still do Jowie?
I don't know.
Oh, my God.
That's unreal.
I follow him on Instagram.
Do you?
You fancy him, don't you?
He's so someone you'd fancy. Let's move it on. Right, that's unreal. I follow him on Instagram. Do you? You fancy him, don't you? He's so someone you'd fancy.
Let's move it on.
Right, and the girl.
What's the girl called?
Poetry.
Poetry Lucia.
Okay, Lucia's a gorgeous name.
Lucia's beautiful.
Lockie and Popo.
I get the abbreviations,
but I mean as if they're actually going to introduce themselves.
So I'm Locket Poetry.
That is mental.
On my baby list names, I've got a few and I know
they're going to be controversial and I know people aren't going to really we're not going
to have the same names I like Shiloh Shia and Shy sorry Kiki I think my favorite is he going to be
I'm really shy but then you know that song Shiloh no I live under a fucking rock um so Shy for a
boy you could call a girl I like Carterter carter very american it's a bit
american i also quite like um cassius for a boy cass prince cassius cassius and shy i think are
quite cute cassius of what was that narnia oh that's not what i'm going for well i know but
i like kaya for a girl okay i have that doI-A. I have that. Do you? You know from that film. Kaya. Where the cruel dad singers, her name is Kaya in that.
And I wrote it.
It's a very cute name.
I can read out some dog names.
So like Shai, Kaya, Shiloh.
Right, no one call their children any of those names because they're for Ruby.
Yeah, thanks.
Okay, I'm going to read out some dog names.
I'm not going to give away my baby names.
Not that they're that, like that different.
Right, ready?
Yeah.
I would love to have one called Johnny and one called Walker.
I just think it's quite cool. I was so not expecting that I don't know why
I just think it's quite cool two dogs Johnny and Walker yeah I quite like that
right what breed would you get no idea I know Toby wants a lab if it was up to me yeah black
lambs fucking black labradors honestly every time I walk past a fucking black lab, it's, I'm like, they're not that cute, are they?
Like, they're a lovely dog.
I'm not like, they're the cutest breed.
Yeah, he grew up with them, they bred them, it's a family thing.
I prefer a golden retriever.
Yeah, but all the hair.
I know.
I think any dog really comes with the territory, doesn't it?
But probably a cockapoo, because I grew up with a cockapoo and they were like,
I know, precious.
No hair and no allergies and I'm an allergy gal these days.
I'm an allergy gal too.
So I'm thinking
we're just going to have to go
practicality rather than
like the big lovely...
You know what I love?
A deep bark.
When someone answers the door
and there's a deep bark,
it's scary, okay?
Like no one's going to be...
Do you know what I mean?
It also like deters people.
It does.
Even Poppy, like her bark was quite deep even though she was a little dog and like the postman would be like, ooh one's going to be, do you know what I mean? It also like, deters people. It does. Even Poppy,
like her bark was quite deep
even though she was a little dog
and like,
the postman would be like,
ooh,
and I'm like,
well,
obviously she's not going to do anything to you
but like,
it is quite good as a safety feature.
Do you know what I've bought
because I live on my own,
beware of the dog sign,
I don't own a dog.
Oh my god,
that's so clever.
Yeah,
I have it on just like,
by my door.
That?
Beware of the dog
and it looks scary.
That's fucking genius.
I'm going to get the same thing
it just will deter people
oh my god
that's so clever
if I buy them off Amazon
I'll send you the link
we're going to have to
talk about me and Chelsea
for a moment
let's talk about it
it was a different series
for me the one that's
now airing
that we just filmed
I was
took a bit of a step back
okay
you know
she piped down that potty mouth.
I piped down.
I've been very loud for a good few series.
I've had a lot to say about everything and everyone.
And I thought, you know what?
We're going to pass the baton on, Jules.
Here you go.
She is so funny.
She's so funny.
She's so great.
She's so nice.
I just watched a clip of her and Lauren Sintes.
Lauren Sintes.
Having an argument on the dining table
like screaming at each other I was like how dare they this is my branch and then it just pans to
you and you're like there's really no need no it was like there's really no need for this I think
because that argument came um very unexpectedly and even producers were like it was about a boy
Tina and Miles who I think it's just aired
that they went on a date
Julia had made a comment
that it wasn't going to go anywhere
and I think Lauren thought
that the comment
was unnecessary and mean
Lauren was backing Tina
being like
well you don't know
it's not going to go anywhere
why would you make these accusations
sorry
love Miles so much
but if you're going to date him
on Main Chats
and you think it's going to go somewhere
then you're really just
we love you Miles
no you're the best person ever
but like
we know him so well he wouldn't date someone on the show if he was serious about them i just am
gonna say that that's my opinion yeah and that's what we've seen yeah i agree and that's been the
track history of the last eight years okay so miles and tina that date they went on i'm guessing
that didn't go anywhere from there i think they're not it did not no so jules was right by calling
that jules was always right I like Julia who else
is Zeno and Harvey
back together
I think that
they are
from TikTok
it's like fairly obvious
they're back together
on social media
they're posting a lot
in Julia's
they're always together
it's in Julia's TikToks
I'm like
she gives the tea
I don't even think
I follow her
I don't need to
because she's constantly
on my view page
I literally see everything
it's phenomenal
I've always heard
this make me laugh she's like coughing sorry my mum's calling me to because she's constantly on my For You page. I'm like, I literally see everything. It's phenomenal. I've always heard this make me laugh.
She's like coughing.
She's like, sorry, my mum's calling me.
And then she's like, sorry, I'm just eating a baby bell.
What are you doing?
None of it makes any sense, but it's really like a fun watch.
Such a fun watch.
I think it was a strong series.
Like, I think it was a good series.
I hope people are enjoying it.
We go back to filming in January.
I don't really know what I can say.
I know that there's a potential going away. Oh, lovely. for two weeks, which for me is the perfect amount of time. I don't
even know if I'm invited at this point.
You need to still report, Tim. You need to pull that spoon out. Any spoilers? Come on,
give us something, Tim.
Do you know what? I feel like going back in January, there's going to be a lot of like
loved up people.
Okay. I'm not talking about myself. I'm just saying that like the series has ended a certain way there's going to be a lot of like loved up people okay
I'm not talking about myself
I'm just saying that like
the series has ended a certain way
and I think
oh I think things are going to lead
in a certain direction
okay so also Tristan and Julia
there's going to be some labels
in January as well
wow okay
I think the show's been a single show
for so long
there's going to be some
boyfriend girlfriend situations
I think there'll be a few couples
coming back
god this is going to be fun
I'm watching that series for sure I say this about every new series but I'm going to be some boyfriend-girlfriend situations. I think there'll be a few couples coming back. God, this is going to be fun.
Yeah. I'm watching that series for sure.
I say this about every new series, but I'm going to-
It's hard watching television.
You know why it also is?
Because the clips ruin it, the teaser clips.
I know, I know.
Because then I'm like, I know everything's happened now.
Yeah, and you basically can follow it all on TikTok.
You can see it all on TikTok.
Yeah.
Right, we're going to play a game, guys, called How Pissed Off Would You Be If Your Boyfriend
Called Another Girl These Nicknames?
And then we're going to obviously like-
I've seen this all over social media right this is cool this is cool
this is gen z this is what the people want right so you've got a boyfriend let's just put this in
scenario and he goes and calls a girl good girl or princess which is worse princess
i'm gonna say i'm gonna say good girl only because I can see
princesses being perceived
as like a bit of a joke
because it's so like
oh hey princess
but then you could just be like
well she's a good girl
like she's a good girl
good girl
I don't know
either one's not good
in my mind
princesses perceived
as a little bit more
jokey and sarcastic
good girl's quite bad
just picture Toby
right
there's a girl there
he's calling her either good girl oh she's a good girl. Just picture Toby, right? There's a girl there. He's calling her either good girl,
oh, she's a good girl,
or, oh, she's gorgeous.
Gorgeous is worse, obviously.
Gorgeous is worse because you're also alluding
to the fact that, like, she's quite hot.
Yeah, no.
No, don't do it.
Fucking no.
Who's actually doing this
and saying these things to people?
Like, are you being serious?
Who came up with this game?
Jesus Christ.
Okay, do you want me to just ask you? Gorgeous gorgeous i'm guessing you agreed with me on the gorgeous yeah totally
gorgeous or hun don't care if you call her hun hun is fine hun can actually be quite mean you're
right hun you're right hun she's that hun oh hun oh hun stop hun do you want to make me a cup of tea
yeah go on hun i actually don't think I even call, like, my friends hun.
I find it a bit, it's like dear.
Like, hey, dear.
Like, some people call you dear.
I find it annoying.
It's sarky and it's kind of, like, neggy and funny.
What do you think is worse?
Him, gorgeous or mate?
I think...
Obviously gorgeous.
We know the answer to this.
Mate is like, yeah, she's my mate.
She better be just your mate.
Sometimes it can be perceived as being overly friendly in the platonic sense
because they're trying to hide the fact that they fancy them.
That's me really looking way too much into it.
But definitely gorgeous is worse.
Someone's calling someone gorgeous.
Like, are you serious?
Yeah, that's the worst one.
That is so horrific.
Toby's filming this lovely lady called Brian at the moment.
Imagine him just going, just move a little bit to the left, gorgeous.
No, no.
Absolutely no.
No.
But let's use another scenario.
Hun, do you mind just moving over to the left?
Yeah.
Actually fine.
I just can't imagine him saying...
Hun, you would never say,
I'd rather die than say that,
but you know what I mean.
Yeah, yeah.
Gorgeous or wifey or work wifey?
Wifey is death.
No, no, and no.
Okay, if you're single, fine. you can call them whatever the fuck you want
not when you're in a relationship my work wife no no no you're not having any work wives no
do you want to keep breathing it's horrific as if people are saying this sort of thing i've got a
story oh she does got a story right come on spill the beans so i used to work at a modeling agency
which is predominantly women and like very female heavy office and most of the guys there are also gay yeah most of the guys that
work there were gay but there was like one straight guy who was like the head of finance who was like
he was a good looking guy is it like a school theory though like when you're at school you
fancy the school teacher because there's no decent bloke yeah there isn't any boys because
you're in all girls school but if you took him out of that environment and he, like, you placed him in the pub, like, how fit would he really be?
Yeah, probably wouldn't look twice.
But there was a couple of girls in my office that, you know.
Tickled their pickle.
Yeah.
Did a little bit.
It hurt.
It's.
He had a million work wives.
Oh, my God.
Think about how many, like, offices are, like, a real split mix split mix gender wise so maybe it doesn't happen
as much it's when it's like more condensed and everyone's like focused on one person
because that's the only eye candy they've got all day yeah that was the guy in my old office
jesus christ right guys watch out for any work wifeys also does anyone have any work wifey
situations i'd love to hear some stories stories of work husbands working out in the sense
that they just remain
your friends
and it's fine.
But also in a sense of like
maybe it slips into something
it shouldn't
and the same with a work wife.
Yeah.
Please tell us.
Yeah, tell us.
Stories, dilemmas,
anything I'd love to know.
I bet there's so many
affairs at work.
Oh, fuck yeah.
Also Christmas parties.
Christmas parties.
It's coming up
at that time of year.
Love Actually,
look what he does
to her in Love Actually.
Oh my God,
I'll never get over that scene.
Okay, right.
We should probably get into the dilemmas.
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and desktop. Dilemma one. Hi guys. I fancy this boy big time. I had a chance with him when we
first met, but I never acted on it. Now he's got a girlfriend and seeing them together has been
awful to watch.
I was recently introduced to one of his best friends,
and we got along really well,
and now he's asked me to go for a drink.
Do you think it's a bad idea to start dating the boy
I really fancy's best friend?
I worry that I'll completely ruin my chances
of being with the boy I actually fancy
if I end up dating the best mate.
Do you think guys care about this kind of thing
the same way that girls do?
Any help would be much appreciated much appreciated well this is difficult because he has a girlfriend to start with so i'm not really sure if you're holding out hope and hope is stop holding out hope he's with
someone else yeah there's plenty more fish in the sea date the mate uh-huh i get it it's really hard
to lose feelings but at the end of the day he's got a girlfriend there's nothing you do yeah
you've got to stay far away from that if you're thinking at some point in the future I would love to have the
option of dating this guy and he's probably not gonna be this girl forever fine don't date the
best friend there's other people you can go and date but at the same time I don't think she should
be holding out hope because you're then going to end up just like cock blocking yourself and you're
not going to meet anyone else and then you're going to be like overthinking everything and he
might marry this girl and then what she's just waiting you don't know he's in a committed relationship as hard as that is and
don't get me wrong that sounded a bit cold but like I think she would like be a lot happier in
the long run if she just tried to move on from that situation and did like open the doors to
other people I 100% agree but just date and have a fun time and then if he's it's really hard he's got a
girlfriend we just have to leave it be and just go date other people and have fun forget about him
you've got to forget about him girls are really territorial over their exes a guy's the same I
think context is key I think if a guy has been with someone for a while or a long time and been
in this long-term relationship with someone would he be upset or care if his mate was to date her
yeah I think he would.
I think morally, whether you're a girl or a guy,
I don't think it's right.
I think if he'd gone on like a couple of dates with someone
and it didn't really go anywhere
and like his mate wanted to date her, fine.
Like maybe we as women would be slightly more like,
well, no, I went on a date with him.
I think maybe as men in that situation,
they'd be more relaxed.
But I think if it was like a long-term committed
relationship they would be equally as bothered yeah and also I guess it also depends on the
timing of when the relationship was like if you were a lot younger and it's been like five six
years they're in a new relationship they might be like mate honestly it's fine like she's a great
gal we didn't work out you go for it so. So true. I agree. And like, timing's key. How I think everyone should try and be about their exes, because if you still care
for them, you want them to still be happy. And if you ended in good terms, it's nice to not cock
block your ex in a way. But then if it's recent, I don't know. It is so circumstantial. But I don't
think boys are as bad. I agree. And I think to like your point is so true and so valid. I think
it depends how long it's been. If it's been years and years and that person is now in a really happy
new relationship um or doesn't even need to be new then i think they would be more relaxed and
they would be like honestly i wish i were the best go for it i also think boys just get over
shit much quicker some girls would fall out over this and never be friends again boys would be
pissed off for a week and then they'd be fine.
Yeah.
Because you know why?
Other guys are really unsympathetic.
Yeah.
Which is not great,
but the other friends would be like,
oh mate,
what's the matter?
Why do you care?
You're not even with her.
And then you've got to get over it
and then that's it.
So to summarise,
I don't think you going on a date
and seeing how it goes with this best friend
could be a soulmate.
Let's not rule it out.
It could be.
Going on a date with him is not going to ruin your chances of ever dating the friend.
Like, let's be honest.
That's insane if it does.
Yeah.
Equally, we shouldn't be thinking like that because he's got a girlfriend and we have to just be...
Respectful.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Blinkers are on.
Is that what I mean?
So, yeah.
Go on a date.
See how it goes.
Great.
Surely he's not going to catch that.
Surely.
I hope not.
He's the one in the relationship, so I don't think that would be fair.
Please follow up with us on this.
Yeah.
This is probably a really common scenario,
especially at like uni and like...
Early 20s.
Yeah, like this sort of thing happens all the time.
I mean, living in London,
this sort of shit happens quite a lot.
I feel like we hear about this quite a lot.
About 100%.
Even like in our friendship circle.
Toby's dated so many people
that his other friends have dated
and he's like really can't...
Like you can't...
You can't... There comes a point where you're like, well, there's only so many people that his other friends have dated. And he's like, really? Like, you can't, you can't.
There comes a point where you're like, well, there's only so many fish in the sea.
Not that Toby's dated that many people.
That made him sound like he's dated the whole of London.
Don't worry, Tobbs.
Okay, so dilemma number two.
Hey, ladies, I've always dreamed of buying my first home.
And after years of saving up, I went to meet with a mortgage advisor to discuss my options.
The finance team ran a credit check which discovered that I had outstanding debts from companies I had never used before in my life.
I know where this is going, now I've got chills.
This means that I cannot even be considered for a mortgage for another five years.
Oh my god.
Shit.
I did some research and pieced together that the purchases were made by a close family member who pretended to be me they used my name details and identity behind my back to take out
loans which were never paid back the loan companies have said i don't have to pay the money back as i
have been a victim of fraud however in order for me to remove the debts from my credit file i would
need to report this person to the police this could leave them facing jail time oh my god there
are a lot of complicated feelings involved.
I'm no longer in contact with this person
and she denies every single chance
she has at owning up to what she did.
I would hate for this person to go to jail,
but her actions are stopping me from buying my home,
which now feels impossible.
I can't believe the situation that I am in
and I want to know what you would do
if you were in my position.
As a reminder to anyone out there,
always look into your finances.
Your bank account credit score
can be very different from what it says on Experian.
That is heavy and I feel so sad.
I've got goosebumps.
I feel so sad for this person that's wrote it in and I can imagine that this has probably happened,
not maybe in this context, but with people in the wrong relationships
who have put their name into things that they shouldn't have.
Oh my God.
Listen, I'm going to be cutthroat.
I'm with you.
It's you or her.
She's the one who's fucking done this stuff wrong.
She knew she was breaking the law over and over again
however many times she did it.
I think it's all the lies and the deceit.
It's also like she's happily fucking you over.
Like she's obviously broken the law, which is awful,
but she's also completely
fucked over a family member and completely lied about it wasn't taking any accountability for her
i'm gonna be honest with you she's going into jail but like white collar jail i don't know
she's not gonna be in there for years it's a white collar crime as such so i don't think that she'd be
in with like people that are like murderers and people
like that right I don't think she'd face a particularly hefty sentence I think she'd do
a few months maybe a year fuck her in jail she'd do a year on good behavior she wouldn't do anything
you know what scared me I watched that um series called time it's all about female jails fuck me
it's scary I'm gonna watch that tonight what's it on I think it's on BBC anyway listen listen
you know what your options are either you don't get a mortgage for the next five years and even
then it can still hinder your thing because they'll back date and some mortgage lenders
probably won't lend to you because they'll be like well you've got a previous thing of debt
or you get a lawyer and you understand what the consequences of this whole thing are going to be
like I would like to report this.
I don't want to press charges against her,
but I need this being removed from my name.
Yada, yada, yada.
If it was me...
That bitch is going down.
I would do it, and I would say to...
Honestly?
I would say to the prosecution or whatever,
like, I don't want to press charges
and I don't want this person to go to jail.
However, I need my name being cleared.
I think that she would have to go to jail.
It's your cousin. Do you have a cousin? Yeah, I've got a few. Your favourite I need my name being cleared. I think that she would have to go to jail. It's your cousin.
Do you have a cousin?
Yeah, I've got a few.
Your favourite cousin
in your head.
Okay.
He's done this to you.
She's got a baby.
She's got a boyfriend.
He's not that great.
Baby daddy.
And she's obviously
had to take out some loans
and she's thought,
Ruby can take it.
I'm going to fuck Ruby over.
Well, she was wrong
because Ruby can't take it
and Ruby now can't get a house. Ruby needs a house so Ruby also lives for Ruby and needs to live her own life life is
too short I agree I completely accept that it's complicated but I think my gut is speaking for me
and intuition is saying that that is wrong and she should face the consequences sadly as hard as
that would be and I don't know how you like navigate that but it's also like how do you move forward when she's not taking
any accountability and she's not apologizing that if anything will make it easier for you to actually
like turn her in or whatever you call it if she had an extremely guilty conscience and she was
so apologetic that would probably make things 10 times harder for you because she'd probably be
begging like please yeah please so listen if it was me I would speak to a lawyer I would just be you because she'd probably be begging like, please, please. So listen, if it was me, I would speak to a lawyer.
I would speak to like my parents.
Speak to someone who's like a little bit older and wiser than you or like anyone that you have a relationship with.
My dad I would speak to.
Got some experience.
Get their advice.
Get a lawyer's advice.
Speak to a lawyer for half an hour and see what they think the scenario would be.
And make a decision from there.
Ultimately, I'm not going to tell you to send someone to jail. But i am going to tell you that it's a necessity to get on the property ladder
where are you going to live you could have a baby in five years do you know what i mean like you've
got to you've got to put yourself it's really i just can't believe a family member has done this
to you neither can i it's not even a friend it's like blood if you could please follow up with us
we would love to know what happens next also Also, make sure you are getting, I guess, professional help in this sense.
Absolutely.
Professional help, sorry.
And look after yourself because this is actually really fucking shit.
And it's like a big life.
Oh my God, it's a huge setback.
Problem.
Yeah.
Love you.
Sending you lots of love.
Yeah, love you.
Okay, dilemma three.
My boyfriend and I have been together for almost two years now.
There is nothing majorly wrong in our relationship.
We love each other so much and are extremely happy,
but there is something that's getting me down.
My love language is definitely gift giving and acts of service.
I love buying things for my boyfriend,
whether it's snacks he likes or something I see that reminds me of him.
I also like doing little things that I know will make him happy,
like making him a cup of tea in the morning, etc.
That's lovely.
However, I didn't get anything in return and I bought it up multiple times over the past year I don't expect him to buy me things all the time but the little acts of service are
something that I never get back here here I'm with her at the start of our relationship he used to
always do little things to make me happy but now he refuses to do them Christ it's quite one thing
to like be so forthcoming and then just like not do them at all i know people talk about the honeymoon phase and
we are two years into our relationship but it feels like he just doesn't care enough to put
the effort into these kind of things do you think i'm overthinking this is he just a guy being a guy
or am i comparing our relationship to the big justice i see on social media i am with her in
some senses it's not about you know expensive gifts and luxury items, but, you know, making a cup of tea in the morning, seeing a card that reminds you of them, picking up your favorite chocolate bar.
There are things that you can do that are just nice gestures that just make your other half feel good.
Yeah.
And I'm so an advocate of that. And again, it doesn't have to be all the time. It doesn't have to be every week. You know, relationships all about compromise. You've got to put the effort in.
Agree. time it doesn't have to be every week you know relationships all about compromise you've got to put the effort in agree and I think you know especially after a couple of years when that
honeymoon period could potentially I'm not saying it does but you know reality really hits home and
like you're in the rut of life you've got to do those nice things but then saying that it's so
hard when you're looking at you know every relationship on social media and like oh my
god she's got a Birkin and the thousand roses why does she get five cartier bangles that's not real we have to remind ourselves guys
and also if that's the only problem in your relationship you are a lucky lovely like that
is unreal because your love languages doesn't sound like they've ever been the same like
it's really hard to find someone where your love language is the same yeah where you both give the same things like you have to compromise as well as
him so like you have to just know it's just not the kind of guy he is and that's okay yeah but
then you know I hope that he's like pulling his weight in different aspects he's probably doing
things that you're not noticing are his love language like he's probably being really
affectionate or maybe his words of affirmation something else
and you're not noticing it
because all you're thinking is
why isn't he making me
a cup of tea
I've made him one
you're building up
this weird
resentment
yeah tip the tap
yeah which is
not what a relationship
is all about
no
but look at Tommy Fury
and Molly May
yeah
Birkin, Diamond Cartier
APs
you know
massive great
engagement ring
cheating
well we don't know that
but it looks like he was cheating on it we don't know that but it
looks like he was cheating on her they are no longer together but everything was so over the
top and they looked like it was just the most perfect life online that's like so not my vibe
like i'm also like are you guilty yeah i'm like when toby brings me flowers which is such a rare
occasion but like he will if i'm like oh we'll be quite honest to get some flowers and then he'll
like take the hint and the next day he'll maybe buy me some flowers this is guys this is just a typical
bloke like really right I'd like flowers I'd like some and the fact that that penny drops sometimes
is like really maybe four times a year I get that right and if I don't say anything and I do get
flowers which he did once I think he came back from someone he bought me flowers because he
didn't see me in a long time and I was like what have you done what have you
done like it just feels a bit sometimes like why are you gushing over me or I don't know like it's
compensating for something else in my eyes yeah all these extravagant things I know that's not
what you're asking for here you're just asking for a cup of tea and it's not much and I get it
but something like that's just not his vibe. It's not Toby's. Asshole.
Neither of my boyfriends have ever been people of earth.
No.
That's never been their love language.
It's not normally a boy's love language.
It's normally words of affirmation
and physical touch.
Yeah.
Let's talk about that.
What do the Gen Z's say?
Let's deep that.
Let's deep that.
No, why am I going road?
Let's deep.
Let's deepen that.
Let's deepen that.
As in let's explore that. Yes deepen that as a next explore that yes let's deep dive into that
kind of grew to just accept that that wasn't going to happen so the expectation got dropped
yeah I feel like you just only ever get disappointed when you have a certain level
of expectation and then that doesn't happen yeah so you know they both were so different such
different people but they made up for it in different love languages one of them was very
much physical touch
the other one was
sort of more words
of affirmation
yeah
I do think as long as
you feel like you're being
loved in a certain way
you can't get annoyed
just make yourself
a cup of tea
like
yeah
do you know what I mean
like sometimes
life's too hard
you just want an easy life
and then you don't
want to be a nagger
you're like
make me a cup of tea
do this to me
yeah yeah yeah
because it's just
not on their radar
to be wanting to do that.
That's not how they're like thinking
they're showing love.
They're like, ugh, alright.
And then also,
you're getting this resentful cup of tea.
And then you want them to want to do it.
And ultimately, if they don't,
they're probably never going to
because it's just not their love language.
You can't really change anyone either.
I've realised it.
You really can't.
I've really tried.
But sometimes, like, for example,
Toby and I, in a few days,
are going to Cape Town for a week. Oh my God, when go on friday and we oh my god i have booked all the
restaurants he's not gonna do it babe he just won't do it i don't know what it is it's like
a fairy comes down and just twinkle twinkle twinkle and it just doesn't happen and he had
one restaurant to book he's had two weeks to book it
has he done it no did you book the flights every fucking day for the last three days and he's like
oh yeah sorry i forgot i'm like no no no no no we're gonna have nowhere to eat it's a saturday
night it's like prime time in cape town like what are you doing it's a fucking nightmare so sometimes
you just gotta take maths in your own house and just do it yeah okay i'm assuming you booked the
whole trip flights hotel everything flight no we did that
all together so we sat down i think i did the flights he did the hotel no i just meant not
costly like more like did you have to arrange i just feel like we were sat down next to each
other one another he had the hotel booking and i had the flights and then we literally did it
there and then that's what has to happen i have to sit down i can't just say to him
just because a lovely trip somewhere it would would just never happen. Ever. Never, never, never, never, never, never.
But some men will.
Some men will.
Some people are button pushers.
Is that the right?
And some people aren't.
Some people hover over the button.
Yeah.
Which is Toby Watkins.
He darts around the button.
He never presses go.
I've got to just push him into it.
Give him a helping hand.
Yeah, let's throw a spanner in there.
Do you think this lovely lady that's written us a dilemma,
do we think that she should stop doing acts of service? Give him a helping hand. Yeah, let's throw a spanner in there. Do you think this lovely lady that's written us a dilemma,
do we think that she should stop doing acts of service?
Let's just see if he notices, all right?
Let's just test the theory.
Let's not make him a cup of tea.
Let's not do X, Y, and Z.
See if he notices and go, well, you're not doing it for me.
I almost think no, because I feel like when you do stuff like that, you're also kind of doing it for yourself,
and it probably makes her feel good.
It's like her making her boyfriend a cup of tea isn't going to take too long it's going to
make him happy and it's probably going to make her feel good too and just because he's not doing that
as long as he's serving her in other ways and there's other love languages that he's fulfilling
why then stop and be bitter just because he's not you know doing the same one as you
and that could just cause more tension in the relationship because if she's going to be like well you're not doing it i'm not going to do it
imagine if you did that for every point you're not going to get anywhere are you no you're going
to end up being quite miserable okay well that was a really good piece of advice from tim thank
you very much for world's pearly wisdom over there okay guys so we're finishing up the episode now
but we're about to do a follow-up episode with tim again and we're going to be talking all about
nightlife in lond London and where to go.
Ruby's living in her
sex and city era
right now, aren't you?
I like that.
I'll take that.
Yeah, I am.
Also, apparently
there's a tiny
who has an ex-boyfriend
who claimed that he dated me.
In his dreams.
So,
we need to investigate.
We need to deepen that.
We need to deep that.
We need to deep that. Deep that and see if um that's legit
or not anyway you can subscribe now on supercast thank you so much for listening guys and thank
you Tim for coming on that was a lovely episode so much for having me and that was a real quickie
that was just yeah yeah I know it was thank you everyone Love you, everyone. which beats even the 27th best feeling, saying I do. Who wants this last parachute? I do.
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2025. Excludes TurboTax full service and desktop. That's it for this week, Wednesdays. But God,
don't you just fancy some more, Melissa? Yeah, I'd really love a follow up to some of those
dilemmas. I want to know what happens. Well happens well then tinies we have got some news for you we have launched a premium
version of wednesdays now listen subscribers get access to the podcast ad free with bonus episodes
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