Wednesdays - 92: My one night stand got complicated!

Episode Date: January 18, 2023

Hi team! Our damp Jan is going strong and this week we are getting deep! We discuss getting pregnant after a one-night stand, plus, would you be offended if you weren’t in your boyfriend’s 5-year plan? This week we were sampling Clean Co’s Clean G Rhubarb- a great G&T alternative!Sophie Rating- 9Melissa- 7 Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Wealthsimple's Big Winter Bundle is our best match offer yet. Get a 2% match when you transfer over an eligible RRSP. For a $50,000 transfer, that's a $1,000 cash bonus. Enough to buy a fancy parka. A ticket to somewhere you don't need a fancy parka. Or just be responsible and top up your retirement fund. Plus, move any other eligible account and we'll give you a 1% match. Minimum $15,000 transfer.

Register by March 15th. Additional terms apply. Learn more at wealthsimple.com slash match. Hey, you're a Canadian podcast listener, and that makes you important to us. We'd like to know more about you, what you think of this podcast and the other podcasts you'd like to hear. So we put together a super brief survey we'd like you to fill out. Complete it and we'll give you a chance to win one of three $100 Amazon gift cards. That way, we can say thanks for your opinion. Just go to mypodcastsurvey.ca and have your say. That's mypodcastsurvey.ca. Melissa are you a doctor uh I want to be but I'm not I'm not a doctor either and we're not psychologists and we're not experts at anything in fact we just chatted all the shit so and we love giving you guys advice but as we love giving you guys advice do not take what we're saying as

gospel if you do feel like you need to speak to somebody please seek professional help We love giving you guys advice, but as we said... We love giving you guys advice. Do not take what we're saying as gospel. If you do feel like you need to speak to somebody, please seek professional help. Looks like we've got, like, a lie detector test. Lie detector test. I'd love to do one of those. Oh, my God, haven't you done one? Should we do one on each other?

Yeah, should we do one on each other? No, no, no, that would scare me. You guys could ask us questions. Oh, my God. I could get really risky with friendship rules hey everybody you're such a random girl we didn't mean to come matching today we're like in literally the same top half top half where yeah i know great way to think i really need to get my haircut and it died like i love it i love it long please don't cut it i think it looks so nice yeah but how gross is it it's limp it's like limbs i just get like an inch cut

i look like i've got elizabethan child though you know like just limp hair long i promise you your hair is so thick it does not look limp and thin at all get like an inch cut off what about getting it a bit more blonde around the face yeah yeah yeah lovely just your normal fine a Just your normal. Fine. Alexi. But please don't make it too short, because I love your hair mega long. Mermaid vibes. Blake Lively vibes. Okay, but I need to plait it at night. That's the trick, guys.

I plait it at night in two plaits. Same. Stops it from, like, getting really knotty and matted. And also, it's just, like, crimped the next day. But mine doesn't last. Mine will fall out in, like, three hours. No, but I put loads of dry shampoo in it. Do you?

That was my trick that I told Sophie. Yeah. But I've been doing that for ages with the crimped with the plats really my mom got me a new um i bought a dyson air wrap so i need to teach her how to use it i tried no i know there's a but once you get the rhythm of it the hang of it once you get the rhythm it's easy peasy right guys did we say we're drinking clean co yeah we're drinking lovely rhubarb gym clean to be fair quite nice i don't mind that at all pop pop an ice cube in that and you've got yourself a nice gin and tonic have you jazzed it up it's nicer than gin and tonic because it's got

no alcohol in it doesn't have that bitter bitter bitter horrible taste i love a gnt now and again you don't because it's cleaner, so I try. But I don't know, I just get to a point in the night where all I can bear to drink is beer. I'm exactly the same. Because wine's so sweet after a while. Champagne doesn't do it. Yeah, it just gets me like a... Yeah.

I'm exactly the same. That's where I'm also... Yeah. Or just like a Beck's. I don't know what type of beer that is, but like one of those. They're all like lagers. A sole.

Yeah. I like the bottle. I like the the bottle that could look really nice in our studio and you could fill that up with bubble bath afterwards take the oh my god what a lovely idea yeah that's just a nice pink glass bottle isn't it or a candle shove a fat candle in the top on the dining table or vase put some oh my god yeah yes i'm loving gypsophilia gypsophilia gypsophilia god what flowersilia gypsophilia god i don't know but you need to sit down me i chose some i don't know i don't know anything about flowers neither do i i need actually a lot of flower expert coming on the newlyweds yeah he did recommend a few but god am i meant to know them off the top of my head no right golden globe looks okay obviously margot robbie is just such a 10 like i would never

actually like the dress but on her i am actually like i love it i wish there wasn't let me just try it's very it looks amazing it looks amazing she looks fantastic you probably don't follow her but there's an influencer called bridget like she's literally just bridget anyway so her she wears all those sort of like vintagey kind of like you know pinky just super girly and they look very feminine chanel oh yeah because she's now with she's not working with dior is it no it was chanel she moved from to batega but i'm guessing that she's now wearing chanel again because that's not batega yeah so she maybe she wears chanel and batega she wears the two but i remember there's all these pictures of her like wearing chanel and like her face isn't smiling then she's like in betega which

is like slightly more sexy and it's like yeah she looked high-end yeah she looked so sexy well i love her in that in lily james i like i really like it actually her stylist she was somebody i messaged we'll go back on to that i messaged her being like help with my wedding lol that she starts lily james upside pay up you know right oh my god did you reply no i messaged her last night someone said okay my friend lily sadly sent me to her um okay selma hayek love who's that which is what i say to that oh yeah they're lovely the woman who looks a bit like penelope cruz yeah i love i'm obsessed with her freaking sexy isn't she wow i love that dress same again quite gatsby vibe yeah yeah yeah again quite similar boobs out on display and they look fab yeah my god i wish my god she's so great i saw like clips of her like

they were like um fans who speak like she's mexican speaking spanish she was like running up and getting all these like mexican snacks on like the red carpet she was like oh my god cute and i was like oh my god the fan base for that kind of thing is like wild like selena gomez obviously has the same sort of fan base because she's also latina i think yeah is it mexican that she is um i think so anyway yeah similar sort of fan base and they are just like so freaking loyal and like they're so like so yeah sorry who we really need to talk to is this lady from white lotus because fuck me sideways do i like her she's so great what was she when we were younger that we used to love oh cinderella had a story no yeah and was she in legally blonde yeah she was in all the

in the nail and snap yeah the nail lady and she was in what's that the watcher and she was so she brought a lot of humor to that tv show because it's quite a spooky tv show she like made it so funny did you watch that whole thing on one hangover in one day were you not scared no because it was broad daylight i was terrified no i wasn't i was so hungry and i just watched every single episode but how funny was she on it yeah Yeah, fucking funny. She's always funny. She's always the same. I wonder if she seems to be like that in person.

Austin Bloom, whatever he's called. Oh, God, he's a stunning man. He is. He's up there. I meant to be like, but then I sounded wrong. Oh, I was like, I thought you were trying to tell me something and I had to like lip read. I was like, what? were trying to tell me something and i had to like lip read i was like no yeah he's really stuck and his voice why is everyone making fun of it i

think it's sexy as hell sex appeal i actually haven't heard his voice i need to check have you seen him in alphys no i need to watch that film how have i not seen it i didn't really like it really okay good so i'm not gonna watch it no i like got bored halfway through okay i'm not gonna watch it waste of time however oh my god i. Okay, I'm not going to watch it. Waste of time. However, oh my God, I just really got that thinking that was just fizzy water. He's dating Kaya Gerber. What a stunning couple.

He looks a bit like her brother. Her brother looks like Proudlock. Let me show you this picture. You will be so spooked out. Toby found it yesterday and was like, what the fuck? I know, it's really weird i saw pictures of the golden globes last night on instagram this austin butler guy and kaya gerber

and then there was something about in the article about her brother she read the article and and the girlfriend which was lexi wood and i was like oh i recognize this girl blah blah she's just a big instagrammer isn't she yeah she's just a model big model yeah god there's just so much i am as a foursome like just cruising about yeah power foursome that's too much for my hair my eyes yeah too much good lookingness it's almost like they're aliens that's too good looking do you know what i mean yeah they're too good unattainable i can't they might be the new jb and oh yeah hayley they can't break up that'd break my heart oh they will though i've got they're too good unattainable i can't they might be the new jb and oh yeah hayley they can't break it up i'd break my heart oh they will though i've got they're quite how old are they young

they're young they're young she used to go out with pete davidson like what the hell is going on how did he get i've said it once i'll say it again yes to pete davidson okay we'll let you explore like he's so tall it must be that. Yeah, I know you, there is something, the whisper. The whisper, he obviously has to creep so low to whisper in there. How tall is he, 6'5"? Don't know. Don't know. Sophie can read my mind.

Okay, anyway, conspiracy theories. We have to move on because I thought we chatted a load of rubbish just about celebrities, but I love doing that. It's my favourite thing to do. Okay, conspiracy theories. We obviously touched on this slightly last week sorry i thought i really knew what i was talking about the number one is so good read it out loud it's brilliant you guys have written in some april levine is dead and replaced was replaced by her body double melissa so the studio could continue making money from her people online backed up by showing changes in her personality and her physical appearance.

Also, she went from dark and grungy to bubblegum pink and Hello Kitty in her music videos. Sorry, you've lost the plot, everyone. If you think she's dead. There's a lot of conspiracy theories about a lot of people being dead, but they're not. Do you think you would tell if I was dead and someone tried to impersonate me? 100%.

Yeah, I would love you. But the general public might not. I look quite weird. Like, I mean, there's not, like, average people. Do you know what I mean? Like, I'm quite a snide... Niche-looking human, if you mean. Am I just, like...

Yeah, I'm quite mouldable. I feel like a lot of people could look like me because there's a lot of people that do look like me. Yeah, who do I always say looks like you? Lauren Grace. No, someone famous I always say looks like me? Lauren Grace. No, someone famous I always say. Oh, what? Can't think of.

Oh, I know. The girl from Pretty Little Lies or something. She looks a little bit like you. Stop this. Oh, I know. Charli D'Amenio. Right, I need to stop. I'm so sorry to the listeners.

Charli D'Amenio? Who's that? You're making me like... Do you know why this is? Because we've got drank. We've got loads of energy in us. Oh my God god do you think that's what it is yeah also i feel like i haven't really properly seen you that that that much yeah because i've had my mom here helping with the pooch okay we talk we need let's just discuss this conspiracy right for a second whatever

is not dead in my opinion guys i think she's fully alive why did she die did she die off so no found her corpse no no i think it's a alive why did she die did she die off so no found her corpse no no i think it's a silly conspiracy theory chloe god action is actually oj simpson's daughter i've heard this a million times and i don't believe it i'm not i like she does not look like the rest of them she doesn't look like oj simpson yeah but she really doesn't look like chloe courtney or kim yeah do you think they faced you in their like younger photos kim because like i swear she no i don't think so because there's videos of her like i remember like the first kardashian she's i don't think she actually looks that different she's just

aged really well and had tiny bit of tweaks yeah she's had her nose like defined leonardo dicaprio is actually a vampire the reason that he has to date under the age of 25 because they keep him young. No, no. Because I will believe shit like that. Yeah, me too. I really, really believe that. I would love to believe a vampire is real. Oh my God, like that guy who sucked the blood.

What's his name? He like was done for. No one knows where he's gone. Armie Tammer. He's not a vampire. But he was like, he dated all these women. There's a documentary out about it. Guys, it's so interesting. Oh my God, I've got chills all over my body he basically came out he like was obsessed

with all these girls and he would like tie them up like bondage on another scale and he like played it off as bondage but it wasn't he would cut pieces out of their body he like would carve his name into their body with like knives and they were like girls like you and i who just he picked up on the street they were like blown away by like his fame his looks he's so good looking and like he's famous army hammer really famous he's like an actor he was in gossip girl what was he in gossip girl oh my god no my mind is completely blown oh my god oh my god oh my god oh my god oh my god how have i never heard of this he um army he used and then he took all the texts came out basically and he was texting girls like i want to eat your insidesides he was like i want to chop up your bones and blend them into a blitzer and then swallow them

as bone broth hold on so where's he disappeared to oh they think the cayman islands and he like just does brokering up there but then in the documentary spoiler alert goes back into the history his whole family have done it like all the men in the family yeah so i think maybe they are vampires no i've got chills all over my body that's so weird because in gossip girl he's kind of spooky there's a there's a car he like fucks them all over and it makes them like invest loads of money and then like takes it and runs away yeah must play the same as his real oh my god no that's horrible it's horrid conspiracy theories on jamie and sophie okay right i bet some people think i'm his beard but it's like not even a real relationship it's all for tv yeah yeah yeah i used to have that

quite a lot when i used to date harry i remember there was a few i had it not loads i had it twice on two separate occasions in real life which i thought was weird someone going i can't believe you're actually together in real life is it real I've had that what yeah I've had people ask me about you and Harry like no they can't they're not actually dating it's weird isn't it how people think that it's all like for tv so well we don't obviously not fake living with each other yeah I know like what the hell yeah that we carry on the acting till the day like all day 24 hours a day it carries on guys that would be wild if we did well I think we've done my conspiracy theory

i love it i could talk about all the same same same thing same what things are there apparently boris johnson has so many kids he doesn't even know that's why he never says the number of his oh my god mic drop i don't know if i can say this but i'm gonna say it mic drop um boris johnson's wife has previously dm'd toby walkins and she follows him no you're lying you're lying deadly fucking serious no you know you're not we don't know she's unsent it what the fuck just fyi guys if you ever unsend a message to someone that doesn't follow you it will forever tell them that you've previously messaged because

it says accept decline but you can't see what the message is or when it was sent or anything i've had that so many times i never knew what it meant until you told me i wish i could go back in time but then i was thinking like i have it with a lot of people that i now know that i've seen like i was like oh they've tried to message me before but like now they're my friends and they've been like it was normally because you'd be posting something on your story like of a jacket and they'd be like where's that from and then they see in the next story like oh she said where it's from so that's annoying I'm gonna unsend the message or they're now or then your friend and they're like bit weird yeah that's what I think fuck sorry how old is Borisson's wife i have no idea she loves a

toy boy wow she was definitely what's her name no carrie johnson whatever your name is get away from your mitts off him how good is that is i know it's phenomenal all of toby's that is there's a lot of people that have previously dm'd toby that i know it's really quite awkward i know i know i know it's really quite there sorry she follows toby i know how weird why is that the funniest thing i know okay dilemma one here we go hi girls i've got quite the dilemma that i'd love your help with so a few months ago i was on a night out with my girls and ended up drinking quite a lot and went home with an attractive guy stunning stunning we both made it clear to the other that this would only be a one-night stand which never which i've never done before as i'm not looking

for a relationship at the moment wait hold on how on. How does that conversation go? This is just a shag. I'm not expecting anything further from you. Yeah. Is that a conversation you have to have? No, surely that's just like a given. Surely you just do it. Everyone knows that's the situation if you're just not there in the now.

He was a nice enough guy, a bit too laddish for me and the sex was mediocre at best. But I guess it scratched an inch. That was really good. I left that same night and he called and paid for my uber home we parted way parted ways very nicely and wished the other one well and never swapped numbers so socials or socials so we didn't feel it was necessary fast forward six weeks later i'm oh my god fast fast forward six weeks later i'm in fact pregnant

fair to say it was a big shock as this took the morning after pill after he practically refused to wear a condom. Oh no, after he practically refused to wear a condom. And I feel a bit too awkward to demand it. I know, not a very strong woman of me. But nevertheless, my period was late and I am in fact pregnant. Oh my god, this is really quite the dilemma. I have a really good career, a stable home that's my own and I'm in a good place to have a baby even though I'm only 23 after thinking long and hard I've made the decision to have the baby

on my own I'm emotionally mentally and financially able I'm ready to bring up a child into the world right now however I haven't told the guy about the baby at first it was because I literally had no way to contact him but after my best friend did some Facebook stalking, she found his best friend online. So now I have a point of contact. However, I still haven't contacted him. I don't want money from him or to force him to be a part of the baby's life if it's not what he wants. And I really don't think it's something that he would want. He's a young single lad who didn't want a girlfriend, let alone a baby.

Wow. girlfriend let alone a baby wow I also don't want to contact him for him to decide he wants to be dad for the fun parts and then cut out and run when shit gets hard later on I don't know so together I want to protect my baby and feel it's best not to let him know we live hours away in completely different towns from each other and have no mutual friends so it's like we are going to so it's not like we're going to bump into each other but is it wrong of me to keep this information from him any advice would be greatly appreciated p.s i've just found out it's a girl today and you guys are technically the first ones to know oh my god i've got goosebumps congratulations i'm so happy for you that you

want to go and embark on this amazing wonderful journey proud as well like fuck me incredible such a legend i do though think you have a moral duty to tell someone if it's half that baby i think i so i so agree with everything you're saying i know if it was me i personally would want it i don't think I would tell the other person if it was me that's probably not the right decision though but I know what I would do because I would just think I don't know anything about this person as you say they could if anything disrupt the child's life quite a lot and make it maybe more traumatic and like yeah but the child's gonna grow up being like who's my daddy and then one day it'll be like a lot of people have that and then you know yeah but then like you've got to you've got to give

people the options like you've got to give people free will you've got to give that dad the option to be like he might grow up and be like I wanted to be involved like completely involved like that's my child too I don't think you can take that option but then but then there's I so agree with you but then there's also the part so like if he's 23 years old, right, and he doesn't want a girlfriend and he's happy being a single lad. You've got to give him the option. Would he, if he doesn't want to be a dad, would he then feel horrendous for the rest of his life, knowing he's got a kid out there, but he doesn't want a relationship with him?

Would that ruin his life more than him being oblivious? Still got to give him the option. Like, it's not your... If it was you, what would you do? I would tell him. I could not... What if you didn't know anything about the guy he had like i don't know what if he was definitely not the type of man you would want if then i would like take it to social stuff or whatever you do take it to lawyers or whatever and be like i don't want him involved in the baby's life but i think you can't make that decision you know it's like one of those things it's like you've got to give people the free will he's like a grown adult he knows he has choice of his own actions like you know he

he should have the choice to be able to be like i want to be involved or not like how imagine when the kid's 20 and the kid's like who's my dad so hard the dad's like a great guy and he's like i have no fucking idea and the big girls like i'm 20 years old and you just kept my dad from me. I know that's the right thing to do. But I just understand you're doing it. I really don't, I really think you have to tell him. I really do. And I think you should just be like, I don't expect you to be involved at all.

Like, please don't feel like you have to. Like you say, be like, I want to do this on my own. He can't force you to, you know, do anything about it. You're having the baby regardless. But you've got to give him the option to be involved if he wants to be. So hard. A child, for me, if I grew up, I'd rather have a dad who saw me once a week on a Saturday and knew who my dad was than to have no idea who my dad was.

It would eat me alive. And I think that I just don't think it's your choice to make that decision. And I'm so sorry to say that, but I really stand firmly stand firmly with that yeah I really think you have to tell him I think if I was you this is what I would do this is me really I would dig into his life as much as I could from social media get a bit of a background obviously knowing that you're gonna tell him at some point get in contact and let him know this information I would also go and get some legal advice and be like look if this is the scenario if i don't want the child's father to be in my life after i meet him and like i it turns out to be a wrong decision i've let him know yeah

what can i do blah blah blah great advice i so agree and also you know he refused to put fucking condom on so sorry yeah what the fuck's that about he's obviously well at least you're getting a gorgeous a gorgeous little girl out of this i can't wait please what a blessing and as you say you're in the perfect position to raise a child alone regardless to him so yeah if anything this should just be a lovely benefit to having like a father around every now and then you might also really appreciate you know like every other weekend like someone taking on the child and looking after the baby that is the father that's a lovely thing yeah and you you

can't you can't think the worst of these situations like he was obviously nice enough for you to like go home and you said he was nice yeah I really really think you'll regret it I know it's probably quite scary and quite daunting you probably just want to like cocoon your child and like protect yourself and your child but i think that you should tell him and give him the opportunity to be show up and if he doesn't want to show up it no no harm no foul yeah no loss really i get that she might be like oh what happens if in 10 years he decides he wants to be a dad but like in 10 years time your kid's going to be asking you if he's a decent human being he will stick around yeah yeah and if he doesn't then you don't want him in your life anyway yeah but please keep us updated yeah follow up with us please please please please

fanduel casino daily jackpots guaranteed to hit by 11 p.m. with your chance at the number one feeling, winning. Which beats even the 27th best feeling, saying I do. Who wants this last parachute? I do. Daily Jackpots. A chance to win with every spin and a guaranteed winner by 11 p.m. every day. 19 plus and physically located in Ontario. Gambling problem?

Call 1-866-531-2600 or visit connectsontario.ca. Select games only. Guarantee void if platform or game outages occur. Guarantee requires play by at least one customer until jackpot is awarded or 11pm Eastern. Restrictions apply. See full terms at canada.casino.fandu.com. Please play responsibly. Right, dilemma two.

So I need some advice with something. Me and my boyfriend have been together for a little over three years. It's been mostly smooth sailing and we are still so in love. Or so I thought. Over the Christmas break, I went and stayed with him at his parents house for box from boxing day to new year's eve i'm super close with his family so on one of the evenings he went out with his friends and i just chilled at home with his family had dinner and drinks with them etc when i finally went up to bed i noticed his notebook was on the desk with a pen and page marking one page like it had been recently used and because i was a little tipsy i could i of course had to have a peek classic at

first i thought it was nothing he had just been jotting down work related things so nothing juicy for me to read until i got to one page his five-year plan no i oh my god no i'm nervous for you it all looked fairly normal wanting to buy a house, get a promotion possibly even start up his own business but then I realised I was nowhere to be seen he hadn't mentioned that he was looking to buy a house with me didn't mention marriage or kids or anything like that I mean we are only 25

at the moment so still young but I would have thought that he had at least saw me living with life with him in the next couple of years recently I've moved to London for my dream job so we're doing long distance which hasn't been easy but we're making it work we see each other every week every other weekend but we have had a little bit of tension because he doesn't want to move out of his hometown and I can think of anything worse than staying in one

boring seaside town for the rest of my life I've already told him that I wouldn't mind settling down eventually near his hometown because I know he loves it and his family's all there but while I'm young it's the last place I want to be. I've compromised for the last couple of years by living in his hometown so we could be close together but when this job came up I couldn't turn it down. When I asked him if he would consider moving to London for a couple of years so we could be together and he flat out refused and said it was unfair to expect him to move away really my question is should i worry that i wasn't noted anywhere in his five-year plan and should i worry that maybe he's having second thoughts about our relationship because we are now at long distance and do not have a clear path for the head of us i'll just ask him

yeah just ask have the conversation but i think i don't think he's going to want to move. I don't think he'll move, and I think that he's happy living a small-town life and you want bigger and more exciting things. And I think it's going to hit, you'll either go back to seaside town and you'll resent him and you'll forget. Oh, yeah, you'll be bored by the sounds of it.

Yeah, yeah. You want the city, you want the excitement. Especially if you're 25 for at least 10 years. Oh yeah five at least yeah i also don't think that you should look into the five-year plan that deeply like i wouldn't expect to be on someone's five-year plan they've jotted down in their notebook i did never wrote jamie my five-year plan it's my goal it's yeah it's all she with me i write right by a house i don't write by a house with jamie no yeah yeah it's just almost a given like oh i'll be with someone that i'm buy a house i don't mind buy a house with jamie no yeah yeah it's just almost a given like oh i'll be with someone that i'm buying a house like i'll live with someone at

some point yeah i don't even think you even think that i literally just think of myself when i think same so selfish but i think that also like you're overthinking it because you're obviously aware of the fact that he doesn't want to move to where you are and you don't want to move to where he is it feels like there's an underlying bigger problem here there's an elephant in the room yeah i'll discuss you need to discuss and ultimately you know level love isn't always enough there needs to be other things like goals drive no goals morals what's it called when you have like principles in life morals maybe principles do you know what I mean like you have to share the same I guess it is morals morals are like you know standards morals so like you share the same sort of way of life like yeah you like the same restaurant and also like the big life things like right and wrongs of like no we're never I would never do that I would always

do this like you have the same goals like I would love to live here I'd love to have children at this time like if someone's like you would say they never want to have yeah if they never want to have kids then naturally like you might love them so much but it's never gonna work or you're gonna have to compromise on something huge so like if you love him that much you're gonna have to compromise on like where you want to live in your career and shit well i just think ultimately you've got to have the conversation whatever comes of it if he says you really want to stay in his hometown i wouldn't compromise that much like I personally would not be moving to Dorset for any boy at the moment this moment in time

no god absolutely not if Jamie was like right we're off to spend it and I'd be like well I'm sorry you might have to break up I would just be like it's just never gonna I'm never gonna go there so it's never gonna be a thing I'm ever going to do is that so selfish, it's just never gonna, I'm never gonna go there. So it's never gonna be a thing that I'm ever going to do. Is that so selfish of us? No, it's just like, you want different things from life. Like you don't share the same... Goals.

Goals. Don't you share the same, you're not on the same, don't share the same bread and stick, stick of bread. Why are we thinking, so don't share the same stick? You don't eat from the same spoon.

Don't share the same loaf of bread. That's not the same, it's right. Don't share the same you don't eat from the same spoon don't share the same bread it's right don't share the same yogurt we did not know what we're saying you know what i mean yeah yeah at one point sophie and jane were like we're gonna move to la i was like i know you absolutely cannot do that you were really quite supportive i knew you knew it wasn't gonna happen especially now we've got the pooch i thank god well i should be enough of a tie jesus christ it won't ever like la is actually the loneliest place ever to me a lot of people don't like it yeah i don't think you'll like it i don't think i'd like it at all london is much more cozy oh yeah right day number three i'm in a sticky

situation with a close friend we no longer live in the same town so we rely on weekends away together we have both been in relationships for years and years however we are only now going away all together as it makes sense to make it a group occasion with some of the places we stay in my issue is when we go away all she talks about is money her and her boyfriend's lifestyle people what design and clothes they are buying and quite frankly i'm just bored of it i always try and surround myself with down-to-earth and humble people. This trait is putting me and my boyfriend off from being close with them. It happens constantly and feels like everything is a competition. I come away from the holidays feeling so drained. I don't think this is something you can raise with a friend.

I'm close to just distancing myself as I don't want to surround myself by this behavior. Any advice? Love, Anonymous. Oof, that's boring. You don't want to... Yeah, distance yourself. You don't want't want to get like fair enough going for a coffee and just sucking up that hour if you really want to keep holidays no oh you know what though i feel like she's not always been like this it might just be a phase give her a chance yeah she's young i don't know like she might just be going through some sort of a phase and i would maybe politely just be like

it kind of makes me feel a bit shit when you talk about this stuff. Like, do you mind? Like, I want to be supportive, but like, it makes me feel like I'm, I have to like almost compete. And I don't like it. Yeah.

Just be honest. I'd be honest and I would probably just pull back. I would just maybe also just choose someone else to go on holidays with. Yeah. Because holidays is like, you can only go on holidays with a few people anyway. I can't go on holiday with everyone. Oh my God, I god i'm so with you like holidays got to be like your best best

best best friend it's like non-stop time with somebody yeah so i i would definitely cross out your list but lunches and stuff just to like yeah the odd lunch just listen to the the new chanel bags and the blah blah blah and just give her a chance to get over it it could be a phase she might stop I've known people yeah there are people who go through phases of being like that

especially when people like just get a new job and they're earning money it's very is it what's it called new very it's like all a new thing

for them so it's like they're just talking about it a lot or like vacuous it's just quite yeah it will

I think it will just be a phase if I'm honest but I would maybe have the conversation if it gets really bad and stop the holidays as Sophie said yeah right

it's not so single diaries time race through that my news is that Toby will be on the podcast next week with me so guys just me and him so guys yeah basically Jamie and I are going away for a

week um just because we haven't seen each other in a while quality time just a bit of quality time we set for january make sure we're back conquering this year on the best form we can be so next week i'm gonna be replaced by the one and only tobykins. And we'll get him to update you on all the juicy stuff that him and the old Mrs. Johnson have been discussing. I'm absolutely... That is... I know. When you said, I can't, I don't know...

I did not... Am I allowed to say that? Like, that's like the... God, that's a really controversial comment. Right, Bride or Bridezilla, guys. This is a real shout out to everybody I haven't got any outfits for my hen and it's in April we're going to Paris don't know whether I revealed that so Paris destination I obviously is it three nights or two nights I think it's three I'm not sure

I think it's two nights should we extend yeah maybe we could go the night before everything's already worked okay fine well it's two nights and i need basically like six outfits because it's going to be day and night yeah i'm really excited oh my god we need to go together let's just go shopping together and just get you loads of lovely yummy stuff and then also i need to have a friday night outfit for my wedding which is the small dinner just family and friends oh yeah and you're going to be in white i think every night surely surely yeah yes yeah and on my hen do i'm going to just be in white yeah and then i need a pool party outfit guys help me as soon what's the most incredible white bikini that we can possibly find you yeah i mean i would say g swim but i feel like we need something like extra, extra, extra. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Some stunning caftan situation over the top.

Yeah, like, I really need to go all out. I did see a really nice caftan, but everything's kind of, like, in sale from last year. Yeah, I know, we need the new season stuff. Like, if anyone knows. You need a stylist or something. I need a stylist. If there's wedding stylists out there, please. Yeah.

Help. Surely your friend, George Leroux, who owns all the wedding stuff she can help you maybe yeah i'll actually ask georgie yeah actually i just look at her page she's in on it there's loads of really nice kaftan like is there and it'll say bride on it and then we can all have like hands quite cute yeah not for paris in a kaftan though oh no i'm at the pool party also yeah but you're not going to have a head. Bride, I know you don't have that

because you're not a bride anymore after you're not married. And I don't want to have a bride at my wedding. You know what I mean? So you're not a bride anymore the day after.

Yeah, but that's kept on the head and then once it's wedding it's going to be more chic. Mrs J, Mrs L, Mrs L. Mrs J.

I'm going to say J, yeah, but it's obviously his last name, Mrs L. Yeah. In lovely like small white embroidery really subtle yeah might have till death do us part

I've got a real vision I'm going to sketch you up something yeah come on please get it made bespoke okay guys oh and also I haven't got an outfit for my official I haven't got a wedding dress haven't tried my wedding dress on that's happening February but that's happening very soon yeah you'll be there for that

gotta rate our clean code gym i'm gonna give it an 8.5 i'm gonna give it a 7 just because it's missing the alcohol but obviously that's not the point in terms of actually drink tasting like a gin it's really nice i mean literally could be a nine i wouldn't know the difference yeah it's lovely so in terms of that like you should really say there's good flavors popping through there yeah okay guys that's the end love you bye We'll be right back. by 11pm every day. 19 plus and physically located in Ontario. Gambling problem? Call 1-866-531-2600 or visit connectsontario.ca. Select games only. Guarantee void if platform or game outages occur. Guarantee requires play by at least one customer until jackpot is awarded or 11pm

Eastern. Restrictions apply. See full terms at canada.casino.fandu.com. Please play responsibly. That's it for this week Wednesdays but, god, don't you just fancy some more Melissa? Yeah, I'd really love a follow-up to some of those dilemmas. I want to know what happens know what happens well then tinies we have got some news for you we have launched a premium version of wednesdays now listen subscribers get access to the podcast ad free with bonus episodes it's pretty amazing it's also packed full of dilemma follow-ups which

we love and some of our more personal stories and recommendations. And it's super easy. You just listen on your favorite app. How cool is that? Amazing. And all the info is in the episode description and in our Insta bio.