Wednesdays - Ep 51: Threesome at the Work Party!

Episode Date: April 5, 2022

This week we’re asking for your workplace dilemmas and work party shenanigans- it gets messy!This week we are drinking: https://www.waitrose.com/ecom/products/le-bijou-rose-de-sophie-valrose/670297-343262-343263Sophie Rating: 7Melissa rating: 5 Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

We're on the second glass of wine of the day because the first glass is not a success. Should we tell you about this? That was like a South African accent. I know, you know why? What have I been watching where there's a South African in it? Inventing Anna. Her accent is the most bizarre thing ever. It's not South African, babes. No, but what the fuck is it? Don't know, it's so weird.

It's like French slash Russian slash English slash Polish. Well, it's fake south african babe no but what the fuck is it don't know it's so weird it's like french slash russian slash english slash well it's fake isn't it yeah yeah but it's like it's fascinating how she can change it like every time she does as well it creeps me out she gives me greener same i am so happy she gives me the last greener same oh my god okay right oh my god oh my god oh my god yesterday i was watching the the first episode with Toby and I was like, she grosses me out, I don't know what it is, I feel sick, she's giving me grima, she grosses me out, we can't watch another episode. How weird is that? She makes my skin cool.

Oh my god, why are we the same person? She just gives that energy, it's bizarre. There would definitely be like white stuff on her. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. A Nick. Sorry, such bitches aren't we? Sorry, this is her character. This isn't the actress. This is the character.

The actress is actually incredible. She's been in a couple things. Has she? Yeah, I've watched her in something else, but I can't think what, but she's amazing. You know, inventing Alice, she's a real person.

Yeah. You know, one of Toby's friends, girlfriends, knows her from New York. I know that's kind of like my sister's mum's dog, but yeah. Right. She's a big old socialite in New York and she's currently a present.

And I don't think anyone knows anything about her. That's the whole point. But does she give her money, that girl? Don't know, I don't know. I've only watched the first episode. Oh, it's quite fascinating. Is it? I'm invested.

It gets better and better and better. Oh my God, don't you think? The woman looks like Leonie from Made in Jersey. It's frightening. Oh my God Don't you think The woman looks like Leonie from Maiden's Charity It's frightening Oh my god I genuinely It's like Why does this lady Remind me so much

Of somebody It's so Leonie Jamie and I Cannot We're like Hey Leonie Like But basically

Leonie's one of our Like Executives Of Maiden's Monkey Kingdom Don't know if we Should be saying this She's a lovely lady

What? Yeah she's so lovely Anyways The character The journalist Really reminds me of her Same same same They just look quite monkey kingdom i don't know if we should be saying this she's a lovely lady yeah anyways the character the journalist really reminds me of her same same same they just look quite similar and i guess their character at the moment's like quite nice they're just quite kind but like determined like yeah yeah it's fascinating mother nature yeah god we've got loads to catch up with should we start on the wine yeah yeah we need to give a backstory. So I'm a little bit hungover. So I was like, crap, we need to crack open the bottle because it, you know.

And it's stunning weather. So we really, really need a glass of rose. It's really not too. Yeah. And also we were really well behaved over the weekend, right? I didn't drink at all. Did you? Oh no, Friday night.

What did I do over the weekend? We went for dinner at Gold on Friday night. Oh yeah, we did get quite pissed. We did, but we were home by 10. It was stunning. Yeah, you know, because we started early. We had a lovely. I felt completely fine the next day. We did the podcast. We did the we were home by 10 It was stunning Yeah you know Because we started early We had a lovely I felt completely fine the next day We did the podcast

We did the podcast with Flossie Had some wine then Then we went out for a lovely bit Of like late lunch With some more cocktails Then we had late dinner With the boys And then we went home

Yeah but I felt Not even in a smidge Of a hangover Neither did I I was perfect Oh no no no Yeah I was fine Yeah fine the next day

Absolutely fine But anyways So we tried this orange wine Which I thought would be really nice Because it just looks nice Oh, no, no, no. Yeah, I was fine. Yeah, fine the next day. Absolutely fine. But anyways, so we tried this orange wine, which I thought would be really nice because it just looks nice. It always looks cool. Yeah, it does. And also,

my friend, Sophia Conlon, loves it and she's like really into her wine so I'm convinced that we're just not getting the right one. It's our second bottle that we just...

Guys, it tastes so different to normal wine. It's sake. It's sake. Yeah, it is just like sake. Is it sake or sake I don't know I don't know

I've only tried sake a couple times and I was like not really sure about it like I'd prefer to have a normal glass of wine oh god I really don't like sake do you know what's funny

is someone told me maybe my dad just like put me off it but he told me that sake was like the strongest alcohol in the whole of Taiwan it's so strong Jamie

always has sake and I'm like Jamie why are you doing that you're going to get pissed and he's like it's lesser than a wine like oh well maybe we should have a look see at the back of the bottle one day should we try a little sake one day we'll go to dinings and have a lovely bottle of sake yeah yeah can i just give you a bit of like background on last night because i was there with a vs secret model of ages and gentlemen across the table to me god we've both seen one in real life now. She was fascinatingly beautiful.

I honestly, my breath was taken away. They're not real. I know they're not real people. They're aliens, is what I always say. I'm doing a van. Because they're so unbelievable.

Have you seen the photo in the Daily Mail with me and her? No, no, no, no, no, no. Melissa, show it to me right now. I never felt so ugly in my whole life.

Wait, hold on. Oh, shut up. You're so stunning. Okay, I'll show you. I'll show you. Sophie Hibby. Yeah, I'll be there. What's her name? I google Sophie Hibby yeah it'll be there what's her name lol

no probably not yeah it'll be there first thing that comes up I'll just show it to you right now um hang on you're gonna

bully die anyways yeah that was my situation last night but I got a bit drunk because I was like you had a lovely time please

can you just look have you ever seen me look so dwarfed and just awful no you look so dwarfed and just awful? No, you look so beautiful. Oh, please. God, your head is really small compared to hers.

I mean, you are just a tiny little human being. No, she is absolutely stunning. Oh, like breathtaking. Guys, I'm really sorry. Who else thinks that Sophie could just be a Victoria's Secret? My brother always has, like, why isn't Sophie Hivet a model? I'm like, I know what a suit you like. Why didn't you told me that before?

Keeping that in snag. Because I can't let your ego go through the roof anymore when it already has. I just now need to say, I need to say the second bit of really exciting information. So then,

I'm like hungover, go to the gym and boom, smack banner in my face. Water, men, sugar, Harry Styles.

I'm like, what is going on? God, she's just been overbound by celebrity. And he really looked into my soul. I was on FaceTime to Sophie god she's just been over bound by celebrities and he really looked into my soul

I was on FaceTime to Sophie at the time she goes oh my god Harry Styles is staring at me oh my god

oh my god I was like oh my god I think he was saying because I was talking so loudly on FaceTime to Melissa and I was like

can she stop no you probably just saw how pretty you looked because to be fair I just come from filming and you looked all dolled up and looked very nice.

And normally people in the gym are all sweaty. And then in the walls they're so... Look at me go, guys. She's socialising with the... She really is. She's too good for me now. She's too good for me. Lolz.

Okay. So this wine that we're drinking now is obviously different to the orange one because we just couldn't go with it. It's weird. The orange one had a weird couldn't deal with it. It's weird. The orange one had like a weird aftertaste, which I kind of like. It was a satisfying aftertaste, weirdly. It almost tasted like a sweetie or something.

It was like a real lingering flavour. Flingering? Flingering flavour. So what's the wine we're drinking now? It's just a miniature little bottle of rosé and it's doing the trick. Yeah, but it's got Sophie on it. That's why we got it. Oh, sweetness.

So we'll put it. It's called Bijou and it's just quite nice melissa's being quite fussy about it but i'm not loving it but because sophie's hung over she's just like gasping for any alcohol that's going why is that the case because when we were younger though when i was hung over i would be like the thought of alcohol would make me feel sick the next day really sorts you out yeah but now i'm like no Bloody Mary done oh yeah you love a Bloody Mary right can't have a tequila

on a like a margarita oh no no no no that is like I have to really really really be in the mood for a margarita otherwise it does make me

feel a bit sick now I agree the salt I agree I've got off them I quite like a G&T you're not so fan of I do like a G&T

but it makes me a little bit depressed oh it's only meant to do that the next day I don't know what it is or angry it can be and I never maybe it's it just makes me in a bit depressed oh it's only meant to do that the next day I don't know what it is or angry and I never maybe it's it just makes me in a bit of a bad mood I'm not like that like you know I love booze and like I'm on such good

form whenever I drink yeah it's true and I had I had lovely wine the other night at dinner and then I had one gin and tonic and I was like god I suddenly feel horrendous and my brother was like gin and tonic does that to people and I was like it does it is meant to be a depressant but it's like rumoured whether it's like an old wives i mean it just really affects you know sometimes it's all right but i really noticed it like out of the blue it was quite weird anyway should we talk

about this cute little like package that we've been yeah go on you you tell everyone so a listener or two listeners actually sent us this little book of ics which is so funny chloe and francis who asked the nation what their biggest ics were have like made this cute book it's genius but all the ics it's so funny do you want to read some of them out there's one we've like got some screenshots here it's something cute okay number 16 barbershop boost and also the illustration is so epic you guys it's such a cute little present or like a little gift package or whatever anyways watching my man getting boosted up on the chair at the barbers during his haircut really put me off him for a couple of days seeing his little head bumping farther and farther up in

the mirror while he's wearing that cape nah not for me that is so funny especially when they're like already like it means that they're probably quite small so that they need to be pushed out it's just like childlike okay right kiss right. Kiss me through the phone. This is another one. Anyone who uses a form of monkey emoji, especially following a text like, hey cutie, or responding to a thirst tap. What is that? Trap.

Thirst trap. Just know. Boobie photos on Instagram is a thirst trap. Oh, right. Or like a bikini photo. Okay, like a bit of a like, okay, like a teaser picky. Yeah.

Oh my God. And then they're commenting a monkey emoji. It's a hey cutie. I can just say that is just an absolute ick. Cutie. I'm at, you've done me in. No, same, same. That's finished me.

That's finished me. What's truly the worst word you could be called? I don't like darling. I don't, darling. I find it so patronizing. And it's just like what my parents call each other. I just find it a bit icky. I'm like, don't call me darling.

That's disgusting. I like, gammy is a word. I'm thinking like, it's just gammy. Yeah, it's like slimy my parents call each other i'm like don't fucking say i'm like don't call me darling that's disgusting i like the gammy is a word i'm thinking like it's just gammy like yeah it's like it's slimy yeah yeah horrible horrible terrible like sweetie's quite sweet my dad does call me sweetie but i don't like the boy to say sweet or my mom calls me sweets yeah come on sweets sweetie's all right darling i say i say like sweetness oh my god that is sweetness or i would say oh say, oh, quite sweet. I say quite sweet all the time. I don't know why. Quite sweet.

Oh, that's quite sweet. Yeah, sweet is, sweet's very different to sweet tea, though. Okay, my man used to enjoy being the one who would cut up into a ball in order to be the egg during a game of the trampoline race. Crack the egg. Oh, my God. This will be forever be one of my worst memories. I can so imagine that

a big like a big dude trying to like cuddle themselves into a tiny I don't really like it when big guys like

be babyish or if you do a baby voice you're dead to me you're dead to me also the whole like call me daddy thing is just a bit

no no no I don't think i've ever experienced a boy but like i would really struggle to get involved with that surely girls can't actually come on daddy no no it's like you know that movie what's that movie i don't know um i'm watching suits right now and then lewis and his fiancee call each other pretty rogue things okay right skid marks this is the next ick.

This is going to be terrible. I had gone on a couple of dates with a guy and he invited me over to his place so he could cook me dinner. Everything was going well. The wine was flowing, food was banging and the sexual tension was through the roof.

Son of a bitch. I excused myself to go to the toilet, but I saw, oh my God, but what I saw made me feel like throwing up the spag bol. He had so lovingly made skids on the toilet bowl they looked so fresh not that i examined them i felt myself burning with shame what if he thought they were mine he's surely not going to have me scrubbing his poo

off his toilet i felt ill every time he tried to put me to put his hands on me never spoke to him again no no i'm absolutely oh god that's terrible terrible business gone bitches in the house jamie lang in the house oh the boss is checking in making sure our content's good um jamie did you just hear that it's very out for you because it's all about skid marks yeah terrible business that is anyways that would make me feel physically sick and I can really relate because actually you didn't you did have skid marks in your house sorry Jamie's just walked in he did have skid marks in his house guys and but they weren't fresh clumpy ones because that's that's when it's like you know what I am I am actually going to speak up right now this is going to be the

first and last time oh my god guys I have witnessed what Sophie and Jamie talk about when they say that their toilets are badly designed I had to do do an emergency loo stop there the other day, and I was like, God almighty, I have never in my life had that experience. Like, the toilet, okay, basically, it's like a shelf, right? And then the hole is so far back. So you just go to the loo,

basically on a flat platform, which then has to just try to be slid down the toilet into this tiny little funnel it is the most you need to get this toilet changed i honestly i honestly couldn't buy that house because of those because the lose just i mean i almost it is so it's awful and every time we have a visitor or anyone i get a fear of life when they go can i use your loo and i'm like oh god i know what's in there i know what's in there i don't know which one to send them to i'm like which one's safe he's just we like know they're all out of order sorry oh shies and vanelli that's really not good

that's really funny though i like that little bit yeah that's so great and there's loads of more juicy ones to come so maybe we should like read one out every week almost give it to every new boyfriend it should be like a boyfriend guide like this is what you cannot do and don'ts are in this book yeah well there's actually no do's they're all don'ts yeah hideous okay so we asked everyone on instagram if there was any funny like work related stories because it's apparently like all these christmas parties happening now right a lot of gossip and shiz goes down in these things i did have a lot of shiz. A lot of shiz. A lot of shiz.

Do you remember when you say that? Yeah, add shiz on text. Do you remember? You'd be like, yeah, shiz. No, but can we also talk about this? Pew, pew. What's that? The thing that Jamie put on his story.

I don't understand. I sent it to everybody in my contacts. I don't get it, really. Oh my God, no. I get it, like god i get it like but i still don't really get it it's just like it's like the bbm ping ping but it's on iMessage i still say to people ping i know you do because you send me ping and i'm like it's not working it's just written ping i wrote ping ping ping ping ping um anyway sorry office party on that note i do kind of relate because i had my agency office party and we drank from 12 until 1 a.m i know i was so drunk and then the pescatarian me ate all she

woke up in the morning no i woke up in the morning and i was like jamie it's pretty right that you didn't put like your maroosh delivery away he was like i did it's in the fridge i was like oh no that's what that dreadful flavor is in my mouth i'd eaten lamb kebabs i come back on my own like a cannibal and eat lamb kebab when i'm a person it's just awful oh terrible business that is yeah go on man do you want to read right okay so this is just a little one once i got so drunk and ended up grinding on eddie the eagle the famous ski jumper beg your pardon sounds like a great christmas party This is just a little one Once I got so drunk And ended up grinding On Eddie the Eagle The famous ski jumper Beg your pardon Sounds like a great

Christmas party to me I know He sounds like a great guy Imagine you being so drunk And you start grinding On one of your co-workers Grinding Does that still happen

Actually it does You definitely grind What are you talking about Shh You start grinding On one of Jamie's friends No I didn't Yes you did You and me These singlets Alright Okay what are you talking about shh don't grind it on a jamie's no i didn't yes he did

oh you and me be single it's all right okay we got another one a manager at my company shits on her colleagues a manager at my company shits on her colleagues hotel bed this was a couple of years ago and she still works for the company that i would have to quit my job what were they doing for how to do it i don't know that is beyond also i got absolutely paralytic at one party and had a threesome with two colleagues luckily i work in a head office so i never had to see them again wow okay wow guys i think we all need to establish some advice maybe don't have a threesome with your colleagues if you have to see them

yeah that'd be what the worst because even it's even it's bad with like people that like you kind of know but don't but the fact that you'd have to work with them would be really difficult and it's like threesome is like just so death anyway it's just it's really like it's really taking it to the next level like it's so um out there you know you've obviously been like whoa call me that's how when you be like call me daddy yeah yeah yeah okay right these are some little dilemmas okay I had so these are work romance dilemmas what is it from that what is an fub friends of benefits I had a friends of benefits with my co-worker for three years. Work romance is heartbreak.

Is heartbreak waiting to happen? Yeah, that's savage. I mean, I so agree. How can you be shagging someone as a friend and then imagine if they start dating someone else in the office and then you're like, oh. Disaster waiting to happen. So difficult.

Oh my God, the next one's good. Started dating my manager whose ex also worked with us. So messy. Do not recommend. Oh, golly, golly, gosh. No, that's not fun, is it? I feel like we're kind of like used to whole exes like being within the friendship circle.

Like the ex thing is annoying. But work, 95 is quite about that. Like, oh, sorry, trying to get the coffee in the morning. You can't get away every single day. Every single day. And you have to be so professional. Oh, no, terrible. I have a long-term boyfriend, but having sex dreams about a colleague. Oh And you have to be so professional. Oh, no, terrible.

I have a long-term boyfriend, but having sex dreams about a colleague. Oh, you have to cool it off. You have to cool it off now. Yeah, you have to dump the boyfriend. That is your inner subconscious telling you that you are not fulfilled. I saw something today, literally on the way here, being like lucid dreams are something to think about.

Like, they're not just like, oh, I had a dream. Guys, I had the worst sleep paralysis the other night. Sophie knows all about it, but it it was horrible can we just say it look we're bleeping out left by our incentive the last two episodes have had a lot of airtime this is the problem we can't speak about him again we're giving him more i don't know what's happening we're gonna see him saying because we're manifesting him we're gonna walk outside please stop right now and talk about him ever again sorry scrap that no we have to she had a sleep paralysis woke up full on sleep paralysis he was in the corner of my room he had this really long nail and he and he reached his arm over and was like scratching at my arm to get cash and i was like get cash what money suddenly like a 30 pound i don't know

like a 30 pound note was like attached this like nail and he like clawed it back no guys she messaged me she went he's so so mean i was like he's definitely not mean so i don't know what she means does she mean in the dream he's mean? There was lots of like, you know, okay, right. You know, this is how to describe it. Have you seen that Harry Potter where those like Dementor things have the long old hands?

That's what he had. I don't think they have. Oh yeah, like skinny, skinny, skinny. Long fingers. And then like he was breathing very heavily, but very quickly. And when he would move, he would shuffle.

Yeah. Like that. It was horrible, horrible guys and he was like shuffling around the floor i was so scared i was lying there why do you wait but obviously like asleep my eyes were streaming because i was just crying so i was so scared wait when you're asleep were you awake but asleep i can't describe it apparently it's a form of anxiety oh my god you're really sleep or ptsd from that relationship no no no it's obviously related to something else because like it's true i'm gonna clarify my ex-boyfriend was actually extremely kind and

lovely to me like this this has nothing to do with his character whatsoever i don't know why i had this horrible dream it's it's um like when you have a dream that like your tooth's getting sore and like you're desperate for money or something oh my god yeah apparently when your teeth fall out you're like thinking you have money dream that your tooth's getting sore and you're desperate for money or something. Oh my God, yeah. Apparently when your teeth fall out, you have money problems or something like that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And also there's a horse chasing you in your dream. You've got a very strong motherly figure in your life.

I always used to have a reoccurring dream that I was driving my dad's first car and I was sat on his knee and I was driving, driving, driving, driving and I just couldn't brake. That was sketch. Either no brake, that's a really common dream. And I've also had it where I've been in the back of my parents' car and suddenly they disappear and i was driving driving driving and i just couldn't break that was sketch either no break that's a really common dream and i've also had it where i've been in the back of my life's out of

control and suddenly they disappear and there's no one driving the car i've had that over and over and over again as well or you've had it when you're about to have you ever had it when you're like about to punch that one and then you wake up and you're like whoa that was not nice that's almost worse i have that one where i'm running away from stuff and my legs don't work and you're running like a like i can't run that's horrible okay I wish you read the next dilemma is it okay to have a work boyfriend and an actual boyfriend as in someone you harmlessly flirt with harmlessly flirting no but I feel like if you feel the need to flirt with him you get excited when they're around that's more than just flirting it's like you have feelings I think if it's the same person like you're excited to see them i don't think that's really acceptable like it's not harmless is it

james was just like coming to work and having like a flirting with the same girl i'd be like you're basically cheating on me yeah yeah yeah because you're thinking about it yeah i so agree obviously you're like sexually attracted to them right which is so fine but like perhaps you probably shouldn't you need to remove yourself from the situation before something happens yeah um okay right dilemma one dating the boss's son so oh here we go so my dilemma i started working for a company a year and a half ago i met my best friend who was now my boyfriend but the problem is that is the boss's son oh i used to have the best relationship with my boss but over the past year of us being together he has turned into the nastiest man i've ever had oh no he started putting cameras everywhere so he can listen to every conversation

watch how long you spend going to the toilet if you run over two minutes over lunch etc etc he'd go weeks of not talking to me or slagging me off to everyone else including my boyfriend whoa last week he sat me and said he didn't have enough work for me but then he told my boyfriend it's because i cause problems i now feel relieved because i'm not working there but i feel a little bit hurt we also just moved out together moved out together and now i'm in the situation where i never want to see his dad again what would you do would you walk away completely as you never have a relationship with his family now or trying to make it work but avoid his dad at all costs i think it's really difficult i think weird when the dad doesn't sound like he's like you no but like the whole putting cameras in the

work like that is all like a step too far like he needs to fucking calm down yeah sorry but that's really rogue like would you not question and be like excuse me i'd always be like sorry what is your problem with me and why have you said i cause problems yeah i would i think i think you need to decide how much you want to be with this boy and if you are like thinking like right this is the guy this is the one because if he is the one then obviously you have to just confront the situation and hopefully the dad can like get over and you guys can all have like a good relationship there is a lot of people that don't get on with their in-laws right but it depends how close he is with his family like you know I think if you don't get on with your in-laws

and you know you're not calling each other every day but well no sorry I think if you don't get on massively with them and you're not calling them every day day. Well, no, sorry. I think if you don't get on massively with them and you're not calling them every day, I don't think that's an issue. I think if you actively don't get on with them, that is going to be an issue. Yeah. Well, having said that,

it depends how close they are. Think about family occasions. I mean, there is a lot of people where the parents don't like someone, but then they eventually get over it and they just learn to love them. Like, let's look at Scott Disick and the Kardashians

prime example did they ever not like him I think he was horrible in the beginning and I don't think any of them liked him but they just learned to love him

and now they love him obviously like a son or whatever I mean I don't really know what the situation is now but like and he did everything

under the sun to Kourtney and they still loved him and always like backed him up but I think that's just the Kardashians maybe I'm just trying to think of examples where like people don't like somebody and then they learn to love

them eventually because they see how happy they make their other sibling or their child so um I don't know if I was you I would like think like okay right I'm not going to marry this boy it's probably not worth it like I'm going to walk away from this now because it's causing me too much like anxiety and too much worry over yeah and then happiness but if I'm like this guy is the person I want to be with forever I love him so much blah blah I would probably confront the dad and then also say to the my other half like we need to sort this out like your dad needs to stop being so controlling like we're adults here like we're together I'm not causing any trouble you need to stick up for me yeah that's what I say too I'm with you right dilemma two co-worker leaving his gf for me oh love you girls basically me and this guy

from work have always been flirty but he has a long-term girlfriend and a house with her at work at work at a work event last year you you alright? I need another glass. I know, but you are. At a work event last year, I went all cavalier and told him, although nothing could work out between us because of her, I just wanted to tell him I really liked him. Okay, so she just basically told him the truth. Turns out he also likes me too.

Then over the last few months, we've been going on little dates to see if we really like each other, if he wants to leave what he has behind for me, et cetera. Gosh, this is a dangerous game.

I've just got out of a seven-year relationship with myself, but really have caught the feels and see a future with him. I guess my concern is, will he ever make a decision

and just keep having me and her, so to speak? Should I give him a time frame? Eek. This is an eek. What are we thinking? Okay, so if he doesn't sack the girlfriend off now, he probably never will.

He knows how he feels for you. You're going on these dates already. He's already gone past that point. He needs to break up with the girlfriend. Sorry. Also, if you fall in love with two people, they always say you go with the second one because you didn't really love the first one if you can fall in love again. So true.

That is so true. Also, you know, apparently you're meant to have three big loves in your life. I heard it was two. I think it doesn't matter. There's some people that just have one. Yeah, let's hope so. Because I've definitely not had three, so that means Jamie, you bad Felicia bitch. No, I'm joking. I think it doesn't matter. There's some people that just have one. Yeah, let's hope so. Because I've definitely not had three, so that means Jamie, you bad Felicia bitch.

No, I'm joking. I think that I've made, I kind of have had three. Yeah. Yeah. I think you've got to just be like to him, I'm sacking this off. And if he likes you enough,

he will be like, no, no, no, and fight for you. Yeah. I'm sacking this off. Because you don't want to be at the moment. If you want me, yeah, yeah. If you want me yeah yeah if if you want me you've got to break everything off with this other girl that you live with

sort the living situation out and then after a month or two where you've cleared your head and you are technically a single bloke let's start dating and let's start afresh and have an exciting time together you don't catching feelings like that isn't usual do you know what i mean like it's an unusual thing to like somebody that much. So I feel like it's not something that you can obviously easily walk away from. But I feel like he might be taking you for a bit of a ride if he's not sucking the other girl off yet. I do think so too.

I think you've got to like stand your ground and know your worth. Okay. Dilemma three, secret, secret work romance. I've been dating my senior colleague from a diff department for six months and we are happy but he wants to keep it secret i'm like 20s and he's late 30s i've met his friends and family outside work and vice versa we'll arrive at work separately after being in bed

together and say good morning etc at the desk that's freaking weird freaking weird but also quite exciting in the beginning yeah but at the beginning But not really they're six months in I think that's a bit offensive Yeah it is offensive I felt the secrecy was quite fun but now it feels too weird I agree I don't love my job so do I find new No If you don't love your job do it but don't do it for that reason

Then you're just literally party in his hand And it's not an equal Power game But if you don't love your job and then somehow another better option comes along and you're like this is the type of job that i would love fine and then it works out if he keeps it secret still then that's a big bad yeah i think that he needs to be he's not in a higher up position he's in a different department who cares he needs to maybe establish

i would say what we're dating like who cares what's the big deal i've said this before when jamie and i first started dating we obviously were secret for a while and then when everyone found out we like he didn't really put a label on it like i remember we had like an interview with the press something and they were like are you guys working together and you're like no we're just dating and i was just like i remember am i not more than just fucking dating yeah and i was just like no i'm over this i literally was just i'm over this don't want to do it and he was like why was that at the main chelsea press day yeah i remember it i was just like i'm done like don't fucking i'm not i'm not just dating you yeah yeah yeah i have more

respect for me you should be proud of me yeah yeah yeah that's what i think you should feel and embody that but then equally i understand if they've only been dating for a little bit of time things that you don't want to be like why aren't you posting like why are you doing this to me i would just be like look it's obvious that you're like you're not really like you obviously don't want to be with me you're not that into this so that's fine but like i'm going i'm not gonna be your secret like just be like it's not that deep like i don't really get what the problem is like it's really not a big deal that we're going yeah like

fucking relax like you're no one gives a fuck about you yeah god we're savages no but you know what i mean you know someone's like oh can you keep it secret it's like no one cares enough to talk about you that much why are you trying to keep it secret what well then it's just there's only like give me a fucking better excuse and oh i, I'm just keeping it a secret. No. Yeah. Grow up. He might have another girlfriend that he's keeping from you. Surely she would know. I never get these people who have these two relationships. I think it happens more than we think.

It's bizarre. How are you that crazy and manipulative? And how do you have the time? I don't know. People do. And the energy. People do. Right, down on the floor.

Just on another note, this lady, I know, she saw the Tinder swindler walking down the Kingsway the other day. So that's two spottings. God, are you still knocking about the place? I forgot about Tinder swindler, you know? I forgot he existed. Yeah, it's creepy, isn't it?

Suspicious about my boyfriend's girl best friend. Best friend, girls. No, no, no, my boyfriend's girl best friend. Right, I don't like this. Oh, no, my back's already on edge. Same thing no my boyfriend's girl best friend right I don't like this oh no my back's already on edge same thing my back's already up I don't use Instagram but came on especially to find you guys and send in my dilemma oh my god that's so sweet we love you that's actually made my day a really good um commitment to the old dilemma writing in there okay Okay. So I have been

with my boyfriend for a year and a half and right now we are in a really good place. However, he has this female friend that he's known since school and I have had a weird feeling

about her for ages. No, no, no. I don't like this. Got nose, got nose. Yeah, yeah. He has other female friends that I don't have an issue with but something feels strange

about his relationship with this particular girl. He literally can't say a bad word about her and seems to hold her it's jamie with me it's jamie he brought her out three times on our first date no no no no i'm sick i know it sounds like nothing but it has been bothering me for ages and last weekend i told him that i find their relationship unsettling and explained the reasons behind this he basically told me I was overreacting and this is all in my head although I can actually be a bit suspicious person I do feel all my feelings are justified

although I am sure nothing is actually going on between them I feel like I feel like there's a sexual tension there oh god obviously I know I can't tell him who to be friends with, so I basically just have to suck it up. Any advice for navigating your partner's female relationships? And am I overreacting? God, the thing is... You are not reacting because I would be the exact... Yeah.

If anything, I'd be worse. I don't know what to do. No, but you can't because then you push them closer to the other girl. To the person. My inner psycho is coming out for you. I'm getting angry at Jamie right now and inner psycho is coming out for you i'm getting angry at jb right now and he hasn't even done this i'm getting angry at jamie he doesn't even like no jamie has a lot of girlfriends that you don't have any gut feelings about that you know it's

completely sonic and it's so funny you've never had that gut feeling about jamie with any of his girlfriends and i actually have the thought of him like i know his best friend like georgie yeah like the thought of me feeling like that was not just platonic would make like that would be really upsetting but like yeah that's even given me the thought of that then being that close to him so the amount he like admires her to then think of me thinking that that was in a fancy way guys guys i throw up i think i think he doesn't really know he really admires her Fucking loves her As you do with your best friend But Yeah yeah yeah

He potentially doesn't realise That it's sexual And I think you've got to be the person To just be like Look I just feel like You're into this other Your best friend And it makes me feel icky

Oh my god I've got the I'm feeling icky for you Okay well That's our advice for you I'm really sorry Because actually Can you follow up with dilemmas

Because I need to have an update And I feel for you Yeah follow up with this one But what I will say is if it was if it's not going to be it's not going to be so don't stress i so agree and also you can't be living with this like cloud over your head every time you're going to go out and then all it's going to do is lead to you having then like underlying like resentment towards him you're going to leave it for that night and then as soon as you get home you're going to blow up at him and he's going to be like i haven't done anything wrong and then all it's going to do is make you look mental.

Yeah. But it's not because if you've got a gut feeling, you've got a gut feeling. And normally us girls are always fucking right when we do. Have I told you guys about when my first boyfriend, my previous boyfriend cheated on me? It was so bizarre. I've had the same experience. So he was in Spain, I was in the UK. And he was at this day festival.

Anyways, we didn't like call each other 10 times a day. So it's like so normal that he hadn't said anything yeah i woke up at 1am and i ran like honestly it was like something possessed my body i searched by the bearing much i'm actually like the least jealous person in the whole entire world i searched the instagram search or facebook search this girl because i was like oh my god they're together i just freaking knew i instagram search her she's at the same festival as him i was like go back to sleep once i knew i kind of i thought they were flirting in my mind anyways three months later i found out that he cheated on me i was like with who and it was that girl how on that night on that night guys how weird

i'm psychic i remember i had the same thing so i I was in England with my mum in Somerset. And my boyfriend at the time was in the south of France. He was working there. He was there for like three months. And we were watching TV and I was like, I just have a really bad feeling that something weird's going on. I was like, he hasn't replied to me in an hour, which is like quite normal.

But I just had a bizarre feeling in my tummy. It was like butterflies. Like, I just felt weird. I was like, mum, replied to me in an hour which is like quite normal but I just had a bizarre feeling in my tummy it was like butterflies like I just felt weird I was like mum I've got a really bad feeling she was like why anyway I was going out there two days later and no no no yeah two days later get to his apartment he opens the dishwasher after cooking me dinner there was two wine glasses in the dishwasher this girl had been over again what do you mean turns out turns out that they'd had a kiss and then she'd gone over again to like discuss it with yeah terrible business but I was like fuck mom like my gut feeling was so right and like the fact that me and my mom had a discussion about it was weird and I always taught myself out of it like oh no like I did it's obviously just a funny feeling like it's it's not nothing. Because you don't think you're not a psychic.

Yeah, I know. I was like, yeah, it's obviously just not a... Yeah, yeah, whatever. Anyway. Bizarre. Yeah. Bizarre. So, sorry to scare you all, but gut feelings. Gut feelings, I really do think, speak to us.

So, the single diaries. The inner psycho is that I just... We've decided that I probably just fancy Toby a little bit too much so like the anything he does it's almost just like I it's almost like you're jealous of it

I'm jealous of him as a person I don't know what it is I don't know what it is I'm like I just do you have this? no at the beginning did you? you were like I just love you so much

I'm just like I hate you a bit no did I have that? I you? You were like, I just love you so much. I was just like, I hate you a bit. No? Did I have that? I hated him because he, like, fucked up. Not because I was, like, jealous of him. Or maybe I am jealous of him. Maybe not.

I think, well, you are. I don't really know. I don't know what it is, guys. I've never had this before in my life. Sometimes I do hate him, yeah. It's almost like I feel like, you know what it is? It feels like I'm constantly on the back foot. That's what it is. And I've never it before you don't think it's equal playing for melissa tasselman most definitely is no i don't know i just i've always felt i know this

is quite bad i've always felt like i'm you feel a bit insecure around him no i don't feel insecure around him and will you feel like but it's almost like i've never had a boy that people genuinely probably stop talking about it right now i've never had a boy where people like look at him on the street and stuff like that so i'm like no no no no stop looking at him stop yeah i said to elissa he she's got to box him up and no one's allowed to look at him that's it anyone see him tuck him away in my pocket tuck him away in your pocket shrink him in the wash and then just keep him that's what it's gonna be i just think it's all a bit of a learning curve with like a i don't know like an adult new relationship maybe he will

shrink your ego a little bit oh yeah okay you know what i mean it needed to be shrunk shrunken after the old psycho moment that happened i actually i actually really um ego ego's not that that's not what an ego is i know what an ego is why are you talking about a shrunken moment so unique it brought me back down to earth a bit that I can't just like be like this and that with somebody

like it brings me back like oh okay like I actually can't do this anyways I have been okay I think I've been

a brazilla because I called the actually I called the wedding off text the wedding I said look

I was putting it all on hold because I had such meltdown. Melissa, you try, don't look at me like that. You try planning a wedding. It is so hellishly stressful. I feel like I'm on the brink of tears.

I've had a turn. Yeah. Why don't you just go to the fucking registry office and get married? Honestly. Because I'm going out with the biggest attention seeker

in the whole entire universe and he can't wait for the day when everyone just looks at him. He honestly is daydreaming about it until that day. So, yeah. He's come back. He's come back for this little segment of the podcast. Anyways, but the wedding's back on. We don't have a venue, but yeah.

Oh, God, here he comes. Oh, here he comes. Putting in his two pence. Why are you walking such a... You hurt yeah help me like you became the biggest bride ziller saying the wedding was off yeah i mess you know i text the wedding planner saying just i know and then guys i did such a quick turnaround like you'd actually be proud of like the shamelessness of me i just messaged him on monday morning being like sorry about yesterday's um breakdown anyways can you check these venues for me i literally just said no shame no no shame i literally was like just don't want to waste anyone's time wait did you realize no no i'm proud it's quite weird sophie's go-to they probably get that they probably get

that a lot i reckon jb messaged him her probably being like hold fire she's not being serious she's just having a moment did exactly that knew it how did you know that because I know it was too weird that no one replied

yeah I did message that no but with Soph her immediate reaction is I don't want to get married let's break up that is like and I'm like

alright where did this discussion stem from whose parents are we going to tell first I know you so well as well. It's like when we can't

find a restaurant to eat at. So he's like, oh, I just want to go home now. It's like, why'd you give up? Yeah. What happens with her is she has like a blueprint

in her head. So she says, right, I want the walls to be white and I want the thing to be this and that. If it doesn't go to plan, she hates it. She can't.

I'm not going to compromise. I'm not going to change plan, she hates it. She can't, she can't. I'm not good with compromise. I'm not good with change. You're not good with compromise. Yeah, I'm not good with compromise and I'm, I actually think I'm getting better but it just,

I was on my period last week so let's just blame it on that. Yeah, we can all, yeah. Anyway, should we rate the wine? First wine,

orange wine, zero out of ten. I didn't really like this either that much. I'm going to give it a five. Like, it was all right. If I shove a load of ice in it, I could drink it. It's cured my hangover. I'm going to give it a five. Like it was all right if I shove a load of ice

in it. It's cured my hangover so I'm going to give it a seven. It's done the job. It's done the job. If we shove a load of ice in it it's quite nice and it's called Sophie so.

Yeah. Love you Hans. Bye guys. Love you. That's it for this week Wednesdays but god don't you just fancy some more melissa yeah i'd really love a follow-up to some of those dilemmas i want to know what happens well then tinies we have got some news for you we have launched a premium version of wednesdays now listen subscribers get access to the podcast ad freefree with bonus episodes. It's pretty amazing.

It's also packed full of Dilemma follow-ups, which we love, and some of our more personal stories and recommendations. And it's super easy. You just listen on your favorite app. How cool is that? Amazing. And all the info is in the episode description and in our Insta bio.