Wednesdays - Ep 52: BFF Dating My Ex!

Episode Date: April 13, 2022

This week the podcast is coming to you from Mexico whilst Sophie is on holiday! This ep we’re debriefing on Nicola and Brooklyn’s wedding (how stunning!) and have some in-depth dilemmas to sink our teeth into…from relationship drama in the friendship group, friends dating your ex, and not getting on with your boyfriend’s identical twin! Sophie is 6 hours behind so sadly no wine this week, but we’ll bacbe k on the vino when we’re reunited in the studio next week. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hey, you're a Canadian podcast listener, and that makes you important to us. We'd like to know more about you, what you think of this podcast, and the other podcasts you'd like to hear. So we put together a super brief survey we'd like you to fill out. Complete it, and we'll give you a chance to win one of three $100 Amazon gift cards. That way, we can say thanks for your opinion. Just go to mypodcastsurvey.ca and have your say. That's mypodcastsurvey.ca. Yeah, he's funny. Hey, hon. okay hey hon hey hon i'm gonna take a picture of you so guys i'm in mekiho she's um being very um look at her in her bikini. You can't see her, but she's in her bikini.

She's got her little necklace on. Oh no. You always get bit into that. I know, smother. They love you. I literally have a problem. So tell me what time it is then. Oh, what, 9am or something?

9.40, gracias. And it finishes the food at 10.30, the breakfast. Oh yeah, you've got to get in. You've got to get in. You've got to get in. So I got two boiled eggs because they're free-range and organic, which I'm getting back into the egg situation, Vanessa. Stunning.

With just some avocado and really delicious toast. Like, the toast is like, let me show you. Sourdough or something. No, it's like crunchy, thick, gorgeous white bread. That's brioche bread. Brioche bread, yeah, yeah, yeah. Brioche bread, that is stunning. Absolutely stunning.

I've just been for a lovely lunch. So guys, for me in England, I'm in England, I've just come back from Paris. Imagine if I was in Paris and you were in Mexico. Probably can't wait.

I've just come back from a lunch. It's 3.40 and I had quite a bit of wine. Yeah, what did you have then? Tell us, give us a little debrief. She's a bit pissed.

so we get there, we get there and we get given these blue margaritas because it was for a Nip and Fab thing and their branding was blue. Oh my God, stunning. It was blue. And a blue margarita. I only had half of it because it was right before lunch.

It's actually hard to drink a mug if you're not in the mood for a night out and you're not actually already a bit pissed, I found. To just suddenly go straight into a margarita and I'm like, oh God, it's so strong.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And sometimes it tastes a bit like salty seawater because like the salt from the rim goes in and you're like, no, no, no. And that's all I can taste.

I was just like, whoa, okay, this is a bit much. So I had half of that. Why was it blue? I'm so fascinated. I just think because the theme of the day

was kind of blue. So they just popped a little blue like 10 minutes. A bit of spirulina, I feel feel like just to make it go a bit blue do you know what i mean something like that um then two glasses of whispering angel i felt like i was at nifty beach and you know what the weather has turned now it's gone a bit grey but it was i've been wearing this all day outside sophie just this no coat nothing just just a long sleeve top guys and it's been sunny all morning

it's been delightful very mild warm like if you're stood in the sun you're actually hot wait i'm upset because because it was meant to be do you remember when we were like oh my god it's going to be the hottest april ever that's this week that's weekend this weekend east weekend yeah that used to be the heat wave so i'm'm hoping it still happens. Should we have a little look-see, actually, guys? What? That's really sad. Do you want to hear something lovely? It's raining.

I'm kind of happy because I'm having the saddest East weekend ever. Yeah, what are you doing? Do you remember when we were pissed? We arranged for you to come to spend the weekend with Toby? Yeah, I was like, Melissa, I'm going to come to you. And she was like, I'm with Toby, but come to the family. I fully just invited her to Toby's. He was when we sat there like, all right, Toby, but come to the family. I fully just invited her to Toby's family. He was when we sat there like, all right, Melissa, quite punchy from you.

I'm on my own. Because Jamie's doing radio. Oh no, I thought you were doing something with your sister now. No, she's in Spain with my dad. So Jamie's doing Radio 1, so I'm just literally on my own, which is really sad. Not for a whole day. Is he doing Radio 1 for a whole day? Well, he's doing it till four, so I think we'll have to ease to dinner.

What day is this? Sunday. Oh, fine, but you've got Friday, Saturday and Monday. Yeah, fine. Monday, no. Monday he's in Manchester. Who cares about the Sunday? But never mind. Never mind. Never mind. Let's move on. Never mind. Can't be. Can't have it all. She's in Mexico. Can't have it all right okay we've got

some really topical stuff we've got some juicy juicy things to talk about when this is this all happened guys when i was in the most romantic place me and hermione my best friend one of my best friends were in paris the weekend and then we saw the brooklyn and nicola got married it was incredible and guess what guys here's some tea you. The people who are doing our music, did theirs, ALR, at Georgie LaRue's brother, Alex LaRue, his company. How cool?

Do you think he'll spill some goss on it? I bet he had to sign an NDA. Or whatever that's called. Yeah, but I'm sure he could just... Yeah. I was going to say something like get him a bit piddled, ask him some juicy questions.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I've got to find out something. Surely you will ask. He's got to give us something. Got to give us something. I would love to know how much he spent on music. But surely a million. Oh, yeah.

How much was the wedding? A million pounds? They spent three million on the whole wedding. That would have been a million pounds. I think they would have spent a million on like music. No. 500,000. Half a million. like music. No. 500,000. Half a million.

Honestly, a million. 800,000. On music? Yeah, it's like the biggest thing, like the band. They could have had a string quartet coming down. Like they probably had like eight bands. It would have been like. I mean, we'll choose a billionaire.

And also three days, over three days. I reckon they had like four music concerts a day bands sort of thing you've got to think like string quartet would be a different band to them and they had a million pounds you know what i was going to say a million pounds a day but i don't think that would be correct i honestly think it was probably two million on the wedding day and then 500 000 on the other two days yeah yeah yeah i think they would have done a million overall i don't know yeah yeah but a million on the no a million on music just for the whole three days why are we stuck on the music fine i don't know because it's because

he's doing your it does that mean sophie's telling us that she's spending a million pounds on her music can you imagine right Right, okay. So the whole wedding was three mil. I mean, isn't... You just told me how down it's like. Crazy. The richest man. Whoa, his house is 103 million.

Yeah, he's one of the richest men in the whole of America. He's a billion, billion, billionaire. That is stunning. 103 million Palm Beach mansion. Wow. I bet it's just unbelievable. And also Brooklyn had to sign a prenup, which I'm not surprised at

because she's obviously got literally the world's money in her hands and she doesn't want half that. And like, I guess he's got enough money. He was probably just like, yeah, I'm more than happy signing a prenup. I don't want any of that. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

It'd probably be like the dance laurel. He probably would have suggested it. Like, it's silly for me not to sign a prenup from the point of view of my wife. of that yeah yeah yeah yeah it'd probably be like he probably would have suggested it like it's silly for me not to sign a prenup from the point of view of my wife yeah yeah yeah i'm for him to make him in the good books with the dad as well yeah yeah yeah 100 wow what a stunning wedding that only she did look down at her tendency like so elegant and classic i thought her dress was just so stunning and the veil was to die for it really wants to die for it really wants to die for but you know what i have a question about veils that are this long and

dresses that are this long right they only look good when they're all pulled about like that and then you're taking a picture of when you're walking down the aisle no but you're down the aisle they're meant to be pulled out like people should have pulled out and then i guess when you stand up at the sort of the end at the podium right and then you're posing for like you're not posing you're getting married and you're looking opposite your future husband do your bridesmaids then pull the dress into position so it looks like that when you're getting married yeah that's what the dress looks like you're like you otherwise there's a whole load of material just rocked up behind you right I know and like did she have an evening dress?

Because we haven't seen it. We haven't seen that much, have we? All we've seen is the walking down the aisles. They probably want to keep it a bit private, maybe. No, but it was with Vogue. So I think we're going to get to see more. More's going to come out of the woodwork. Surely not.

Yeah, she will have some. Surely she will have some. Okay, right right we need to go back to this so nicola had a oh my god brooklyn will add nicola's surname peltz alongside his current middle name that's have you not seen he put it on his instagram he was like oh i did i just i'm i'm now i'm now like brooklyn peltz but brad beckham I guess it's like why should it be any other way and I guess maybe her family maybe Jamie should be Jamie Habula

Habula yeah I mean why would it be any other way but yeah no I do get it I think it's actually quite cool that they've put her name first and it's Pelts Beckham because it actually sounds better than Beckham Pelts does she have any brothers? Maybe that cool that they've put her name first and it's Peltz Beckham because it actually sounds better than Beckham Peltz Peltz Beckham does she have any brothers maybe that's why they've done it don't know we need to yeah she does have a brother she has a brother she has a brother but yeah I don't know I think it's quite cool is he stunning as well uh don't think

as stunning as her she's like unbelievable she's like a fake I once saw her in so farmhouse and I was like what the hell I've never seen someone look so much like their pictures and we're like there's no catfishing going on there yeah like her face looks like it's

a portrait start like phew the features are very prominent like the lips the eyes the nose

it's all so prominent and like she reminds me of someone but I can't think of maybe Nicole Kidman you know like that porcelain vibe yeah very very pale like almost like see-through skin beautiful beautiful skin i'm looking at so the actress flew to rome twice so nicola flew is she an actress yeah she is i

watched her on something recently shut up i did not know that i thought it's called the holiday the holiday she was in the holiday and she was pregnant i mean she was like a minor minor part she wasn't i mean was she good i think what's i thought she was all right yeah anyway so she flew to rome twice to work with valentino designer pierre paio piozzi i don't know who that is val Valentino. Oh, right, Valentino. The guy who... Right, fine. His studio to ensure every detail of the outfit was perfect. Well, it was a spectacular outfit. I mean, wedding dress.

And it also featured an evil Alice Telsman as well as a message from her mother, former model Claudia Peltz, that was stitched into the dress using blue thread. I love that sort of detail. Yeah, loads of people do that in the veil as well like a little paris hilton's mom did it nikki hilton oh what's her name yeah she's a ledge she's a fuck kathy hilton she's kathy that's it um quite sweet also the spice girls went to the wedding obviously i know that's fucking cool the ramsey family eva longoria obviously because she's um posh bex's yeah she's a babe they're like

i feel like posh bex is so jokes she's so funny do you think yeah yeah yeah it's like well i think she's probably very sarcastic yeah she's like really meant to be so funny like really self-deprecating like not how you think not serious at all that's so deep I watched her there was a video where she was like um I think it was for Vogue and it was about um Victoria Beckham like her clothing brand and she was like um bringing in the trucks and she was like you know these things when people are like reversing and like playing they're like they're almost like um like paddles that you would use to like um do ping pong with like a ping pong bat she had these two bats right like reversing in the truck and it was going like reversing she's like yeah keep coming like reversing in the truck and like in her heels and

like in a suit like doing all this joke stuff and like saying like kind of like putting herself down but like in a really serious way, but it was like so sarcastic. It was very funny. It was like a Vogue thing, a Vogue video. It was really hilarious. So sarcastic.

Yeah, it was so good. I love this little Vogue video. She's also been on Ellen and it's been quite funny. Okay. Can we just quickly talk about the price of the ring? I just feel like we really need

to just talk about that. 350k. What? It's fucking insane. What does it look like? I can't actually picture what it looks like. I don't know what it looks like. I think it's just touch on that. 350k. What? Fucking insane. What does it look like? I can't actually picture what it looks like. I don't know what it looks like. I think it's just a fat diamond.

Not a square princess. No, I think it's a square. If I'm not mistaken. We'll have to have a look after this and post it. But I think it's just a... Isn't that a princess cut? It's a princess. I thought a princess was a circle

with the diamonds around the edge. No. That's a halo. princess is a god someone's been looking at their engagement rings i know all about it because toby's um brother has just got engaged and we were talking all about diamond like what he was gonna get her and we were looking at the shapes and trying to guess and it was completely different to what i guess but i thought she was gonna get princess which is just a very square like the old school yeah rectangle pointy corner sit you I think that's what Nicholas is yeah so do I so do I I actually do too a stunning fucking gorgeous well done

Bracklin she's thinking about her breakfast she's looking at her breakfast I am actually really quite hungry you know but you're making me hungry and I'm just eating so much meat I know but alcohol the minute I have a sip I'm like an hour later I'm like oh hungry, you know. Why are you making me hungry when I'm just eating so much meat? I know, but alcohol, the minute I have a sip, I'm like, an hour later, I'm like, oh, hungry again. Like, I don't, I'm not hungry when I drink it

and then I'm like, oh, starving. Same. It's the aftermath. It's the after. Oh, no. Okay, right. I think I'm screaming and probably everyone in this whole hotel

can hear me because I've got my headphones on, but they get a free podcast. Okay, so message. We've got some content from you fellow listeners. We've got some content from you, fellow listeners. We've got a message from Maddie. Hi, oh my God, I never do this, but I'm re-watching Made in Chelsea,

big fan from Australia, and I am dying watching Jamie and Haz chat about having feelings. I'm so tough for knowing where you are now. It's so funny. Oh my God, how weird. Jamie and I watched that the other day, and we were like, it's actually fucking mental. I can remember each sort of it brings you right back to that time oh

do you remember i see you've got that to look back on it's actually quite nice yeah do you remember i saw you we did like a main chelsea podcast the day after i landed and i was like oh yes i do remember it i was like something's a bit weird and they got they you had like i think you had like you obviously had shared a bed had, like, I think you had, like, you obviously had shared a bed once in, like, South Africa or something. But, like, obviously nothing had happened. And I remember we were, like, semi-talking about it on the podcast or something. Yeah.

And I remember looking at your face and being, like, something's happened. And, like, you didn't want to say it because it was, like, you didn't know what the fuck was going on. But I also really wanted to tell you, but I couldn't. So I was, like, hinting to you. I know, it was so weird. I was, like, telling you in code, but I couldn't tell you. Oh, it was the weirdest you were like what the fuck I was like telling you in code but I couldn't tell you oh it was the weirdest thing ever it was like I felt like so far from you at that point because it was like you were hiding so much from me but like I kind of knew but I didn't want to ask you because I knew you don't want to tell me

it was like you also you did know you knew I knew you knew but you didn't want to ask like it was the unspoken word yeah I know it was yeah it was and also there was so much like controversy with like it being filmed about and then yeah and also Harry used to be so close to Sam so it was like we really

I really couldn't tell you because then Harry would have to tell Sam and I was just like no no this is the whole thing was a nightmare wasn't it such a secretive little rascal

normally you're not normally she's the most open book in the entire world but this that's why it was so hard because I was like what's going on what the, that's why it was so hard. Because I was like, what's going on? What the fuck?

That's why I also knew something was really like happening because you weren't telling me something. And I was like, normally you're like, and I was like, something's definitely happening that you're not saying. It was zero, zero chat. Oh my gosh. That's cute.

Thank you from Australia. We've got another little message from Abby. Hi girls, love the podcast. Listening to episode 48 where you talk about people call our private parts. As a child, my family always referred to a girl's private parts as tuppence. Yes.

Not sure why. My boyfriend is from Newcastle and his cricket mates all use the vulgar word rat. No, I might. The vagina, how vulgar. Not sure if it's just them or a jewelry thing okay i've never heard that but that is hot that is disgusting no that's actually what do we call a penis a fucking squirrel i'm sorry that's the worst thing i've ever heard that's the worst one yet tuppence is quite sweet

i've heard that like oh go spend a penny you know that's what my granny says go spend a penny yeah always i actually think another listener's written in saying tuppence same i just find everything a bit gross because you could almost think of them all in like a creepy like pervy way like oh look at her tuppence but actually tuppence as far as it goes it's the sweetest one yet yeah like i don't really talk about it i'm not gonna be like oh melissa my tuppence is hurting today like not that it does hurt but you know what i mean yeah we just said we just we're just like oh my vagina we just yeah we just say there's no other option i almost night i'm going back to it i know we're looking for

another one but i think it's gonna have to be stuck with vagina forever like it's just gonna have to be here oh just don't call it fanny jamie what do you think is the worst word, vagina, or tuppence for a vagina? Sorry? Or fanny. Or fanny. Or a rat. Apparently, Geordie's called your vagina a rat. Fanny's the worst.

Fanny's the worst. That's what Toby calls it, and it's so gross. No, he can't be calling it a fanny. Right. I know. No, we've got to stop that. But does he do it in a joke? He'd be like, oh, you're fanny time. Yeah, yeah, yeah, when he's talking about it day to day.

Yeah, Melissa, you're funny now. Yes, guys. Sophie has fully seen Toby's penis. Just fully seen it. Melissa just got it out. I mean, you've seen Jamie. No, no, shut the fuck up. Shut up.

You were like what's this picture everyone's seen i've got to see it now and i went yeah right okay i have a dilemma my boyfriend is an identical twin and him and his brother are best friends obviously we've had this about identical twins haven't we we've been together almost two years now and i feel like his brother dislikes me and thinks I'm a bad girlfriend. Oh no. I'm fed up going around to their house and always feeling uncomfortable or that I'm not wanted there. I feel like I'm always trying to make an effort by making conversation, inviting him out with us to do things.

I just don't know how to go about this situation anymore. Please, can you help? Okay. Why twins, identical twins, specifically, oh no, it's always identical twins, are always like two peas in a pod. Like it's just that. Genetical.

I don't know any identical twins. Oh, I do. I know Ann Collier. I know quite a few. But they're not that. They've always been tight. What? Always.

They're so best friends. Because it's apparently like if you feel like, like if one of them gets stabbed, the other one would wake up in the middle of night and feel something or is that a bit that you've been watching too much vampire diaries but yeah it is like they're just genetically like bound together my mum once dated identical twins when she was younger and uh they're both still like sort of involved in my family because they're very good friends with my auntie my mom sister still um but they I think they would like do funny things and like pretend that they were like the other person and like my mom would obviously always be able to tell but it was like quite funny like they were so identical and like best best best friends they have to do

everything together like everyone jokes that like um oh no he can't leave out of um Buckinghamshire because he would be leaving his other half and they're not going to leave each other. Like, as in, they can't leave each other. Identical twins are so morphed together. So maybe it's just an overprotective thing from this identical twin. I mean, you know what?

It's obviously just like a protective brother situation. Shame. What would you do in this situation? What does she do then? I would really make a massive effort with him. I would just really fucking... But she's doing that. Yeah, but like... Lick his butt.

You just got to. Oh God. What would you do? No, but you know what? You shouldn't have to do that. No. I'm sorry. You shouldn't have to do that. Someone should just like you and if you're making the brother happy and you're not toxic and you have a fun, great relationship, then someone should just like you and if you're making the brother happy and you're not toxic and you have a fun great relationship then they should just the hip fanduel casino's exclusive live dealer studio has your chance at the number one feeling winning which beats even the 27th best feeling saying i do who wants this last parachute i do enjoy the number one feeling

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This stupid Wi-Fi is driving me insane. No, no, I can hear you it keeps on me i just i'm not saying anything i know it's mine to say no no i know it's mine it's because you drive i'm lost on what to say to this dilemma right okay let me really think about it what would i do what would i do i would continue just being really nice and you've got to just keep going and if it's really an issue I don't think it's that her boy her boyfriend's not being weird about it it's just the identical twin of the boyfriend is giving off the vibe that he clearly doesn't like her and she's kind of like okay it's obvious now what do I do maybe I would I don't necessarily think you should say something to your boyfriend because if they're that close he might almost get protective over his brother which is annoying do you know what i mean yeah i yeah i do what i think you should do is

you've got to tell yourself is it affecting you like does is he outwardly rude openly rude to you if he's openly rude to you then it's a conversation that you have to have and just be like does he like me because it's almost like pussy if you don't you know what i mean like just man up and tell your boyfriend yeah if one of jamie's family was being really rude to me and i just didn't say anything like that's just weak like you've got to just say it to the your boyfriend but if he's being fake nice then sometimes you know even when you know it's fake just take it because he's still being nice you know i always think like you know people are but it was fake who gives a fuck no but yeah it's not making my life that difficult we've just yeah if it's something

making your life difficult fine but like not everyone has to like everyone so sometimes you are gonna be a fake nice to people out of common sense and if you're feeling but if you are feeling uncomfortable around the house I would almost over i know it's hard but oh i would over compensate almost for that and make yourself seem like you feel really fucking comfortable and it almost makes them think like oh all right then i need to just fucking chill out because she's almost yeah it's gonna be worse for me if i'm yeah i'm the one making it awkward now she's chilled she doesn't care. She's very comfortable around me.

And obviously her and my brother are really happy together. Like, why am I being so weird? Make him feel like he's being weird about it almost. That's what I would do. Yeah. And then if they were being openly rude to you, I would then probably say to the brother, like, not gonna lie, your brother's actually a bit rude.

I don't really care because, like, it's not affecting me. But, like, I am noticing it. And if you're not, that's a bit rude. Like, I don't really care because, like, it's not affecting me. But, like, I am noticing it. And if you're not, that's a bit weird. Yeah. I so agree. You know what I mean? I don't know if that helps. I mean, it sucks a bit.

But also remember not everyone likes everyone. You've got to remember that. Yeah, people don't always get on. But you should like your brother's or your sibling's partner if they make them happy. I always think. What would you do if Jamie said to you, like, Georgia really doesn't like me? And I can tell. What would you do with that?

I would be upset with Georgia. I'd be like, why don't you like Jamie? And I really respect my sister's opinion, but I would be like, he's nothing but nice to you. If Jamie was rude, it'd be different. But if I was like, he's nothing but nice, what's your problem with him? So take confidence that your boyfriend will take your side. Great idea. Dilemma two.

Stuck in the middle of a friendship dating drama. I have a group of uni friends, there's seven of us. Two couples within the group, including myself and my partner. Last year, the other couple split up. Not for any specific reason. She was just not feeling it. He was heartbroken. couples within the group including myself and my partner last year the other couple split up not for any specific reason she was just not feeling it he was heartbroken i did my best to not take sides and support them both i suppose i'm slightly closer with the girl since we lived together for five years well well it's recently come out that the boy has started dating another person in our

group of friends and it's been going on secretly for three months it's especially hurtful to the girl as this is probably the next closest person to her in the group and someone who was really there for her during the breakup shit oh the person he started dating is one of the guys none of us knew he was bi including he didn't know himself he has confided in me that he has been struggling to realize his sexuality and is especially worried that the girl will feel their entire relationship as a lie. The girl feels really betrayed and says she never wants to speak to either of them again. I love them all and don't want to take any side.

We recently went to another friend at the group's wedding and the two boys didn't come as they felt it was too soon since we all found out. I feel bad for them. I reached out to them to make sure they were all right, but I'm worried the girl will feel betrayed by me too i'm not sure what to do please help how can i support my friend through a really tough situation yet remain friends with the other two this is really really tough because she's obviously going through with the fact that her ex who's clearly she's not really over is dating one of her best friends and also she feels like when they were together it feels

like a lie because now he's obviously dating a guy yeah I do get that but I was gonna say regardless to him dating a guy before like the first sentence I was gonna say if he's secretly dating somebody else in the friendship group and it's been going on for three months and they're clearly very happy you just have to get over it and be okay with it because you can't stop someone's happiness I know it's hard when you're trying to get over someone but like at the end you'll end up ruining it for yourself you will and also you know people do fall in love with people that they spend time with yeah Jamie and I and also like the thing is is life's not going to stand still like people you think everyone's so stuck in their own narrative right

so this girl's going to be thinking like this is such a fucking big deal because it is a big deal but everyone else's life they're going to be like moved right he used to go out with her now he goes out with this one that's great we move with the we move with the punches whatever it's like they'll all move on they'll all continue going out and hanging out and you will end up secluding yourself sorry it's not her who's written in the dilemma i have to remind myself this but i think as a friend It's like, they'll all move on, they'll all continue going out and hanging out, and you will end up secluding yourself. Sorry, it's not her who's written in the dilemma. I have to remind myself of this. But I think as a friend, you've kind of got to just, like, reinforce that in her and just be like, look, you've got, like, I don't want to force you to be a girl.

It's happened now. There's nothing we can do about it. Yeah, let's look on the bright side. We've got to be positive, and you've just got to be happy for them, and you've got to carry on with your life. Let's get you a stunning new boyfriend, or let's have a lovely time you being single yeah you know just a preoccupier don't i always think it's quite easy when people have breakups to like you feel like you have to like when they're moaning and groaning like you have to be like oh but don't just be like come on

and be the positive like upbeat person don't let them drag like sorry that's bad to say but you know like don't let the atmosphere don't let them drag the mood down you've got to bring them up because that can happen yeah you've got to take the responsibility to do that because they're obviously the one in the shit place and not going to be able to be positive yeah that helps okay dilemma three that is quite savage but like kind of well done i think think it's true. I so agree. Okay, right. There's a long one too. Girls, love the podcast.

My best friend from uni is dating my ex from uni. And while it's not ideal, as I hoped I'd never see him again, ultimately I just want to remain friends with her and not let this get in the way. Very sensible. She knows I'm fine with it and that I'm in a new relationship. But since we first chatted about it, we haven't been in touch much.

And she hasn't been the best at replying. I'm not sure if she finds it weird that I'm now the ex-girlfriend of her new boyfriend. I think that's probably what it is. However, I really doubt it as she is super gorgeous and confident and has no need to feel weird about me as our relationship was nowhere near as serious as hers is with him the problem is I I'm starting to get a bit jealous and find myself comparing myself to her this is partly due to the fact that my ex was the one who ended the relationship without much explanation and now he is super happy

with her so it makes me feel like she is more likable slash more attractive slash more fun etc it can also be difficult to see on social media as they seem to still be in the honeymoon stage whereas I'm living with my boyfriend of three years and our typical weekend is napping on the sofa or going for a barbecue. I know Sophie has been in a similar situation and has been both the ex-girlfriend who has been hurt by a friend dating her ex and also the new girlfriend who was dating her friend's ex so I was wondering if you could share your perspective and how you could navigate through this. I want our friendship to go back to normal, but I know it will be awkward talking about boys slash relationships with her, even though that has been such a big part of our friendship in the past. Also, I would not want to feel

my boyfriend to feel uncomfortable about this ex coming back into my life, thanks to my friend. I feel so bad for feeling jealous, as I know I can't really discuss this with anyone else, as it would seem I'm not over my ex it is still difficult to completely get over those feelings of rejection and being dumped out of the blue this is a really deep one and a good one I feel like such a relatable one to so many people yeah um what can I relate to that so I think you always, in life, you compare yourself to everyone, right? So firstly, being the new girlfriend, I never actually, unfortunately, sort of got a relationship back with Jamie's ex, really. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

So you didn't have that part of it. But too much had gone on there and, you know, there's no bad feelings. But yeah, there's just not a relationship there. But with Emily and Harvey, who obviously Emily went out with Harvey. So that was my act. Yeah. I think it would be different if Harvey had dumped me, but I dumped him. Sorry.

Exactly. So she, exactly. So she would feel naturally more jealous of you that's that's the point of view that would be from Emily would maybe feel jealous of you maybe yeah but she did yeah I'm sure she didn't we were actually fine but oh god what I will say is time is the greatest healer for ages I don't think it was very like it was almost a bit awkward I would say and then just over time it just became really normal and then even to the point where like we'd talk about like she would talk about her you know you bitch about your boyfriends whatever like we'd both bitch about our boyfriends and it wasn't like oh you're bitching about my ex like it was so different it was like so separated you just time is the greatest healer it was like

that's her boyfriend i didn't i forgot we there was any relationship with me do you know what i mean so i think you've got to just trust the process like it is all fresh it is all a bit awkward it probably will get better yeah and just let time do its thing she might feel a bit maybe she feels a bit insecure around you and that's why she's not replying to your messages like you've got to but like I'm thinking about it from I'm really putting myself in her shoes and thinking okay so I was with this boy at uni right he then dumps me I feel a bit rejected fine but like I obviously like was just rejected yeah then years later three years later I've got a new boyfriend and then one of my best

friends who is absolutely stunning then starts going out with that boy and he then has to be brought back into my friendship group it's just a bit like oh fuck this is a bit awkward this guy rejects me really badly and i yeah it's a bit about no don't get me wrong i get it it would it would make me feel a bit insecure. I can so understand the thought process. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You're like, oh my God, that's what you compare. And you'd be like, oh my God, he obviously likes that type of girl over me. Gap girl.

Yeah. No, I so get it. I think, God, I don't really have any advice because. Because this isn't just people's head. Like it will happen. Like it would happen to me too. These things. Yeah, it would happen to me too if I was in that situation.

You all are. You're like, of course you compare yourself to sabbath girls and i like oh my god they're so good yeah i wish i could give you a magic recipe to like not feel that way but maybe it's consoling to compare ourselves to people all the time don't we we're terrible we honestly sit down and we just do it and then we're like why are we doing that and then five minutes later we're over it and it's like oh god what's wrong with us but like all of us do it and like you just have to be strong enough to get over it and just be like oh that was a natural thing that's okay that we did that but we're not gonna let that affect us we want to move on yeah don't get yourself in a slump over it and don't i know you overthink don't get yourself like your brain whirling like see all

your thoughts as like a passing cloud you know how they say in therapy and meditation like see your thoughts and negative thoughts as passing i'll be like oh that was a thought that was weird that was that onto that don't get down into like creating a don't worry about the fact that you've had that thought exactly yeah and maybe just speak about it to other friends and be like oh my god i feel so insecure because he's dating her now she's so gorgeous and they'll be like oh don't be ridiculous and then you'll just be like oh yeah I'm being ridiculous or you'll just feel better for venting about it yeah but know that you're normal like I kind of wish I wouldn't feel weird about thinking that because I would feel exactly yeah and you know what like you were so young then like it's been years you've got a stunning new boyfriend now that you're obviously happy with

and you're doing lovely content things with and like who cares if you're falling asleep on the sofa as long as you're happy and you guys have a great relationship and also that happens to everyone like that is life don't worry like honestly everything you're saying I'm like trust me it happens to everyone you're probably being like oh god my life's a bit boring or don't we all compare it's comparisonitis yeah it oh is that a word or have i just i don't know but that's the best thing i've ever heard comparisonitis it's comparisonitis and you're just getting yourself a little pickle with it but just bring yourself out of it bring yourself back to reality know that we all do it and feel content in the fact that you are not alone yeah

i would also try and have a bit of a sense of humor about it as well like if you feel like so totally oh you're all a bit drunk like oh quite lost he rejected me what a bastard or something you know i don't know whatever like you've just got to laugh off if you feel the need to talk about it with her and then and then you've kind of ripped the band-aid off and then that's fine and then you can talk about other stuff and you start talking about your boyfriend yes darling then it's fine lovely right that's the end of our um dilemmas but we've got bride or bridezilla i don't know if i've been a bride or a bridezilla this week but i just feel i have to share with you which i've shared with melissa is i'm really having second doubts on my dress and i can't explain why i'm just your mom

is like are you sure you don't want X, Y and Z? And now it's made you think, oh, do I want the other thing? Yeah. It's a lot to think about. It is. It is. And you kind of loved X, Y and Z.

I did love X, Y and Z. And it's not like, oh, I can do it next year and just do a different vibe. Because it's just the once. But you know what? You could have three dresses in one night if you wanted to, Sophie no one is stopping me people do do same if i do

three but like when would i do that that's a bit bougie i know it's a bit extra like what change into it literally for pudding like or does that like what like oh i'm cutting the cake. This is my cutting the cake dress and my first dance dress. You're not so singled out. Oh, I haven't seen my boyfriend in ages. I know. It's been a really good update for you. Where has he been? He's a goner.

He's been in Milan. No, it sounds like you guys have broken up. Stop. They're very much still together. He's just on modelling life duties. I will actually say something. I'm going to out him big time right now. And this is, he's just on modeling what life duties i will actually say something i'm gonna out him big time right now and this is he's gonna hate this i'm gonna say it well i'm so excited um so he did like a q a and a and someone asked like oh are you and melissa still together whatever and then we were talking on facetime i think like the next day and we were

talking about um for like people's followers, like people generally, generally on Instagram do grow better if they're single in some cases. Right. Do they? I don't know. Like, I guess if you've got more of a male audience and you're posting more like fine,

raunchy pictures, you're going to get more people following you because that, cause you're single and they, they kind of all think they've got a chance with you. I don't know. Sometimes it being single can appear better and and I guess oh my god I bet all his followers are girls so a lot I think he's probably got a lot from us chatting about him on this right so because you guys go over and like have a little follow whatever

but also when he when he speaks about me on his story when so when he asked that question you and this stood together, he like posed it. And then like loads of people suddenly unfollowed him. And he said, yeah, I am. Shut up.

And I was like, oh, you're going to probably have to just pretend that you're single on Instagram. And he was like, yeah, I'm actually serious. I might have to, because that was really bad.

And I was like, oh, okay then I'll do the same thing. I'll pretend I'm single and I'm going to go and date some boys. You're joking. You can't have it. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. You can't have it with boys, hun. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

No, no, no. No, no, no. Sorry. Absolutely not. We're putting our foot down on that. Yeah, that's not good. He's not pretending he's single. We're not allowing that. Then what?

I don't think he was like pretending I'm single, but like almost like I'm going to make it come across like I'm less than you. So no photos of you. No photos of Melissa, but he was like, you can carry on posting photos of me so I get the followers I was like yeah no that's not gonna happen can't have your cake and eat it bitch you really can't no that's so funny that's the little update uh he's been outed I'm like honey you can't say anything without getting away with it now I don't know he was semi-joking with that but I'm like no no there was also like an underlying truth like he was kind of underlying being serious you know

you can imagine it can't you i can definitely like he was kind of wanting your your sussing out your reaction you know just seeing if i'd be okay with it yeah yeah seeing if he was okay and then he was like oh we're not gonna do that jokes it was the lol but actually so serious but slash he's never gonna post me ever again no no we need to change that i'm gonna like grab his phone and put 10 stories of people you guys had it here first he's definitely still with melissa so don't be going sliding in don't be sliding in um okay guys we didn't have a drink because it's 10 a.m this morning so i've been drinking water and then i'm gonna have a coffee and i'm having boiled eggs and i'm gonna have my boiled eggs on toast with a bit of

avocado because i'm starving and then what are you gonna have i am going to do some more washing after my little paris trip which by the way was stunning and then i'm going out for my meal harry stoltz jv to so i'm gonna have more food. God, you've had a lovely, lovely day. I've got tequila tasting later with Jamie, which I'm freaking. Why does Jamie just keep, he keeps going back. He's honestly going back and forth

behind the camera with his little. Yeah, with his little slippers, guys, that he still wears. We're doing tequila tasting later. So we'll, oh, also Melissa and I, we're taking the vlogging while by storm. So just keep your hats on because

i am going to be a famous youtuber and you guys just wait don't you might miss me out that she goes i'm sorry sorry sorry it's melissa and sophie's channel also jamie said we could take his channel melissa which has 90k followers she tried to do it back okay guys we love you I did it properly yeah um

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We have launched a premium version of Wednesdays. Now listen subscribers get access to the podcast ad-free with bonus episodes. It's pretty amazing. It's also packed full of dilemma follow-ups which we love and some of our more personal stories and recommendations. And it's also packed full of dilemma follow-ups which we love and some of our more personal stories and recommendations and it's super easy you just listen on your favorite app how cool is that amazing and all the info is in the episode description and in our insta bio