Wednesdays - Ep 55: LOVE LANGUAGES

Episode Date: May 3, 2022

This week on our zoom date we are discussing iconic met gala looks, surviving your 20's, love languages and WEDDING SEASON! Enjoy xxx Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information....

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Starting point is 00:00:39 I can't even remember. Yeah. Oh, yeah, we were. I was in the green dress. Oh, my God. That feels like a life jacket. That was so weird. Oh, my God. No, wait. That wasn't last week. Yeah. Oh, yeah, we were. I was in the green dress. Oh, my God, that feels like a life jacket. That was so weird. Oh, my God.
Starting point is 00:00:47 No, wait, that wasn't last week. Was it not? Anyway. We're both abroad. I'm in Portugal and Melissa's in Mallorca. She arrived yesterday. We've got some stormy island weather, but you know that's the island life, isn't it?
Starting point is 00:01:00 The stormy. It's really stormy. It's actually quite horrible here. Is it? Yeah. But you've had a week of stunning sunshine. No, no.
Starting point is 00:01:08 When we arrived last week, it was miserable. But it was okay because it was just me, my sister and my mum. So we just went on long walks, exactly what you're doing. And then by the time
Starting point is 00:01:16 everyone arrived, my cousins, Jamie and my sister's boyfriend, et cetera, came out. It was like stunning weather. And then the minute they were on yesterday, it's cloudy again.
Starting point is 00:01:25 You know why it's spring weather? It's not summer yet so my dad said like you can't expect yeah the mid-may stunning summer weather in may yet until the end of may then it starts to get more like reliable good you're there for how many weeks so 10 days all together but obviously that the first like five days i'm here, it's cloudy like this. Then my brother comes, his girlfriend comes, Toby comes, my sister comes. Stunning. My grandparents come. Lovely weather.
Starting point is 00:01:52 I know how sweet big old family affairs are. We're going to cover that in the Not So Single Diaries. Big step. Darling, that is a big step. Yeah. How was it with, so the brother-in-laws? Oh, we can cover that later. Sorry, I'm just done. We can cover that later sorry i'm just
Starting point is 00:02:05 me and sophie hasn't haven't fully debriefed we haven't spoken at all there's been not one facetime has that no there's been there's been a couple whatsapps on the daily yeah but very minimal for us very it's been very you'll see when all your family come it's like quite full on you don't get yeah my phone was literally not i don't know where it was the whole weekend it was like that's so lovely when you just leave it like in the bedroom although i did not we're meant to be youtubers i didn't take my camera once i didn't see and i didn't take one photo oh no i haven't obviously vlogged a single thing since i've been here but that's because you know it's just me and it's a bit cloudy but boy it's me and my cloudy my cloudy house
Starting point is 00:02:47 anywho um we're also we're not drinking it's down 20 in the morning so that would be quite rogue on a tuesday yeah after bank holiday like i actually feel a bit it was a long weekend it was a long weekend i feel sick at the thought of alcohol at the minute i have drank do you yeah i didn't i was very good and i was very very very controlled what did i do on the friday you were really good you had a very relaxed i feel like everyone mental this weekend i know and i feel like it's gonna blur people's like days of the week it's because may it's just full of bangladesh and it's like yeah there's like 20 days off in may or something crazy we've got quite what like we've got a really fun May like you come back we do go to Tiff's hand and the weekend
Starting point is 00:03:28 after is Tiff's wedding like it's stunning it's really full on it's so fun I can't wait yeah so we've got to really like watch the alcohol and save ourselves for those two weekends yeah yeah we've got like two weekends now to chill and then then you go big again. Well, not for me. No, yeah, you'll have a big piece. But I'll be okay. I'll pull through. Yeah, exactly. It feels different when it's with your family, doesn't it? It feels more like acceptable because everyone's doing it and your parents are doing it and whatever.
Starting point is 00:03:56 So you're kind of like, oh, it's fine. Yeah, and the next day is like so fine. Whereas in England, you like mull about and you feel a bit groggy. Yeah, you just nest in the room and you don't leave. Whereas here's like right get out in the sunshine let's go out on the boat. Yeah you'll feel like right you just force yourself to get over it lovely. Yeah so my drink of choice this this holiday is gonna be just rose all day. Last night I had a lovely like um something by Ott. What was it? Ott? Oh Ottie. I love that that really nice bottle. Yeah but it was like
Starting point is 00:04:25 a different, they've come up with like a different, I don't know if they've just come out with it, they've got like a different range within it. You know how Mirabelle
Starting point is 00:04:31 is like pseudo-Mirabelle? Yeah, there's loads of them now. It's like a different one by Ott anyway, it's lovely. So I had that last night with my mum. That was divine. I was doing loads
Starting point is 00:04:38 of gin and tonics. I did, I know, really went back into them. I had like grapefruit gin with like loads of grapefruit my hands got like a lot of grapefruit trees i was like what it was where did we go croatia takes me back sophie always used to put a lovely um oh my god i did did i used to drink gin there yeah with grapefruit and you got me into it there as well it's so nice guys you had it here first
Starting point is 00:05:01 a bit of basil or like rosemary or any herb. Yeah, lovely. And it looks really pretty. Just shove in anything. And it's quite peppercorn. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I also can drink loads of them. Whereas Rosie, I get so drunk so quickly.
Starting point is 00:05:16 You're so good. Like you're born to, you're like, you have wine running through your veins, I'm sure. But yeah, it doesn't even touch my mom said at one point it was such a joke at one point because me and mom were drinking so much I was like she's like can't sleep that's it she said it gets me to sleep can't sleep but it I'm glad so it's like oh god that's really not sounding good yeah that's really not sounding good anyway obviously she was shaking guys yeah obviously but also if she lives abroad it's kind of so acceptable again i know it just makes
Starting point is 00:05:50 it different and it's the sun it's the sun it's the sun like does something to us assuming doesn't it i think you must sweat it out quicker as i'll see you detox by quicker maybe yeah you're right wait can you just tell me quickly about that heat magazine with toby and also your text when you're right i'm gonna love it detox fine wait can you just tell me quickly about that heat magazine with toby and also your text when you're like what's oh my god so that actually genuinely made me feel very anxious some one of toby's friends sent him this like screenshot of an article from like twitter or something like lol because they're like a headline or whatever they'd written on the like caption was like oh something melissa's fit boyfriend toby something about flossy you know we did that episode podcast yeah flossy guys something referring back to that right
Starting point is 00:06:31 and um one of his friends obviously sent it to him and he sent it to me like lol and i was like no no don't ever send me stuff like that ever again because it just gave me like a wave of like i don't know why in your chest it's almost like the thought of other people talking about me is just like a strange, horrible thought. I don't know what it does. It just does something to me. And it also makes me feel like my power's been taken away slightly. Do you know what I mean? Yeah, I don't really.
Starting point is 00:06:55 Even though all they were doing was repeating what we were saying in our podcast, which is like so fine. But like for some reason it just was like, I was like, don't send me stuff like that. I don't want to know stuff like that. It's not hot. Did you read it? No. No. Oh oh it would have been no way no but when you messaged me like who's been saying he's fit i was like i'm pretty sure we've no as in as in the person who's written the articles obviously taking that upon themselves to say fit in capital legends that's why i was like who the hell's writing this article i was like what is she on about
Starting point is 00:07:25 I was like is she drunk I was like is they just had a look at him and seen he's fit and he is fit me and Hermione
Starting point is 00:07:32 were like why the fit in capital letters like everyone was fucking calm down it's probably because we were in the podcast we know he's fit guys
Starting point is 00:07:39 we know he's fit it might have been because I had said it in the podcast and they were to me that I do feel like we talk about it quite a bit he is stunning they if they got it right they would
Starting point is 00:07:49 have said something yeah at least it was a compliment and he let's stop talking about toby he's not the um star of this show guys just um yeah okay so cocktails holiday cocktails my was a gin and tonic gin grapefruit kept me going but i could drink it all day long I didn't drink it so that's going to be your drink of choice at the hen day and the wedding then no because I don't think
Starting point is 00:08:09 we've got gin I read like the thing they've done vodka and tequila and I don't I don't I don't tequila
Starting point is 00:08:15 what do you're going to just have the rose I might just I think I'll do the same with you let's do a glass of rose a glass of water
Starting point is 00:08:22 because we've got a long day I'm more excited for the hen day this is my first hen day of water because we've got a long day I'm more excited for the hendi this is my first hendi I've ever what than that your wedding
Starting point is 00:08:27 yeah yeah I'm sick I've been to weddings but it's because I've never done it and it's going to be so fun and the itinerary we got sent through the itinerary the itinerary looks unreal
Starting point is 00:08:36 I'm very excited I actually I think weddings are like I've never done a hendi but weddings are my favourite thing same they're just so wholesome and lovely aren't they
Starting point is 00:08:44 so wholesome like lovely so wholesome like the most wholesome like you feel so warm all day you know what yeah everyone's in the best mood everyone's a good happy drunk like nothing nothing it's very where you get someone who's like really hammered so true so true everyone's always in a really really great mindset met gala come on let's discuss. Yeah, go on. Give me your thoughts. So I loved Kimmy's dress. I thought she was stunning. Kimmy's was probably my favourite.
Starting point is 00:09:10 And you know why? I think it's because, you know how we were talking last time about the last thing that she went to? Oh, yeah. We were so bummed out about how she keeps covering herself up. We literally said this is the old Kim. We were like, why is she doing that such boring, like get some sequins, get some other texture
Starting point is 00:09:23 than that stupid life. She heard us. She heard us. And like, it just it's amazing did you see her walking in it though she like could take one inch of the step it was like oh my god i also just a little bit weirded out the more i think about it about her and pete like i just don't really i just don't really get what they talk about they look really sweet together in this picture that we're looking at right now like the height difference like they look yeah like he just looks really happy he's like yeah see I'm so happy right now this lady on my arm do you know what I mean yeah he's like fucking hell although like he has dated some
Starting point is 00:09:59 absolutely fire people so yeah he really has I thought Hayley looked unbelievable as per but i wasn't sure about the black tights i don't think they were necessary i liked her i don't know why i just didn't think they were necessary i don't know like how it goes from being obviously because it's tighter around her thigh to being darker on the ankle i feel like we could have just done without the black tight but maybe there was a reason for her wearing them yeah what was the theme again i don't really know wait hold on i think we've got it here gilded glamour was that it yeah and like a bit of they so they wore like you know marilyn monroe wore those thin sort of tights and they all had a bit of like a feather boa and glitz fine so she's following the theme with that she's following but the outfit was fabulous i like the way she like threw it up in
Starting point is 00:10:37 the end it was like an angel way same did you see um blake lively i don't think i have oh my god no i need to see she like had a dress that transformed. And so apparently they were like the king and queen of the event, Blake and Brian Adams. Yeah, it looks unreal, doesn't it? Oh God, she is just a vision. There's something about Blake Lively. Oh my God, wow.
Starting point is 00:10:58 A vision, am I right? A vision. She looks like a full-on princess. Wow. She really is the queen. She's so decadent like in everything she wears there's so many jewels and like sequins i know and the colors that she pulls off as well and never ever ever looks tacky it's always so like chic i don't know how she
Starting point is 00:11:13 always has her own style within every other style so it's so blake lively that dress so blake lively it's the colors it's also like so serena what it is it's serena yeah it's serena vibes like she really incorporate maybe they base it off her but like it's always a bit ethereal like she always has like plaits and like half a hair up and then like the gorgeous jewelry and like i'm just obsessed you know how wedding rings got rose gold we had this discussion so it looks kind of pinky diamond i didn't know that's really cool what the actual Wedging Ring's got rose gold? We had this discussion. So it looks kind of pinky diamond-y. I didn't know that. It's really cool. What the actual rock is.
Starting point is 00:11:47 It's all rose gold. And like the rose gold obviously reflects slightly into the diamond. So it looks quite like pinky in certain lights. It's really cool. Oh, I actually don't really love rose gold jewellery just on me. Neither do I. On me. But on her, obviously, it's just like the perfect.
Starting point is 00:12:00 Yeah, because it's gold. Like it's less harsh than gold, I guess. It's more soft my one of my good friends that's just got engaged her band is yeah um rose gold and it looks absolutely stunning really the one it's just a bit different the girl you are you showed me her right yeah alex the really stunning diamond it is that's rose gold i know it's stunning really oh my god that's so interesting she asked for it or did her boyfriend just be like... She always wears rose gold always.
Starting point is 00:12:26 All her jewellery is rose gold. That's the thing. If you wear rose gold you can only sort of wear rose gold. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think you can...
Starting point is 00:12:32 To be fair, I think you can mix. Some of my friends wear rose gold and yellow gold and actually it's really cool because she's really tanned. Should you ban people
Starting point is 00:12:40 that don't follow the theme? Okay, this is obviously going back to the Met Gala. So apparently like people are getting quite annoyed about the fact that some people haven't followed the theme down to the T. You back to the Met Gala. So apparently, like, people are getting quite annoyed about the fact that some people haven't followed the theme down to the T.
Starting point is 00:12:48 You know what I mean? Yeah, I didn't quite get... I get that she was obviously doing it for Virgil. Is that how you say his... It's pronounced his name. Virgil, I believe, yeah. Yeah. So I kind of respect it.
Starting point is 00:12:58 Who are we just talking about here? Kylie? Yeah. Kendall. Kylie. What? I thought Kendall did. I thought hers was decadent glamour
Starting point is 00:13:05 or whatever yeah I like Kendall's and I also like the fact that she don't wash out her eyebrows quite sick why does that look nice on her
Starting point is 00:13:11 yeah it looks like why does she look nice with no eyebrows because she's just perfect I also always I think Kendall's like grown her eyeballs
Starting point is 00:13:18 her eyes are bigger everyone go and look at before and afters it's like she's had something to stretch them and they go up like you know they're it's like she's had something to stretch them and they go up like you know they're like a cartoon she probably had that weird thread
Starting point is 00:13:29 thing that they've all had but then it's so dangerous i don't think they can have it anymore they banned threading have they well i don't know i feel like there's all these horror stories so it's like how do they even allow people to have it done now so wait sorry jared loretto that confused me so much i thought there was two of them. What do you mean? It's not Gerard Loretto, is it? It's Gerard Leto. Am I okay? Yeah, why are you looking at this?
Starting point is 00:13:51 There's a picture of Dakota Johnson with Gerard Leto. I don't know, Gerard Leto. Am I saying that right? Gerard Leto, yeah. And then someone else who I don't know who it is, but they dress exactly the same same and it's dakota with jared letton this other guy and it looks like there's two jareds and then scroll through and you can see dakota's outfit she looks really sexy she's got the stunning fringe situation which
Starting point is 00:14:14 maybe is doing them which is really good why does she look good with fringe this fringe situation is looking stunning on people oh right so people referring to ggid because i don't really get how that is in gilded what is gilded glamour because could you say that's gilded like a fish and she kind of looks like she's got scales that's that's a girl that oh wait hold on gilded do you mean gills that like a yeah that's exactly what i mean but that's maybe she got it wrong and she thought they should dress like a but that is a bit strange i think she looks for not like she always does i think blake livey's the winner for me in this whole scenario blake then kendall then dakota johnson no mine's blake and kim oh yeah sorry kim's gotta be up there blake kim then i love kendall's too
Starting point is 00:15:07 kendall's is stunning also don't you just feel like yay chloe she went to the met gala her first one did she why is she not included um she's wearing like a glittery glittery what you'd expect her to wear like it couldn't be more like 90s i need to have a look 90s like fashion like flap dress vibe you know what i mean like god i'll have a look 90s like fashion like flap dress vibe you know what I mean like glitzy gotta have a look at it glitzy glamour
Starting point is 00:15:29 she posted it on her insta no she hasn't that's a shock why hasn't she posted it I don't know she must have maybe she didn't oh got it
Starting point is 00:15:37 got it got it got it got it oh my god and Kourtney went too Ryan Reynolds Blake Lively
Starting point is 00:15:41 Regina King and Lin-Emmanuel Miranda were the co-chairs of the event so this means that their roles they helped put together their entire guest list
Starting point is 00:15:50 that's wild they worked that's cool yeah that's so safe but like savage if you got uninvited and it was because they just had a personal
Starting point is 00:15:57 bandage for Grangie worked with top chefs to create the specific menu which is often in line with each year's theme I would love to see the menu other notable Met Gala coaches in recent years have been cage perry taylor swift jennifer lawrence bradley cooper with sarah jess parker in 2014 oh sick they were
Starting point is 00:16:15 definitely so cool so this is why obviously um chloe and courtney have been invited because they've obviously made some sort of a cut with the hosts this year or whatever the co-hosts whatever you call it yeah maybe or maybe like keeping up with the kardashians is weird so they're more in the press i don't but i don't think that's the reason why i think you've got to make some sort of a fashion statement in order to be invited like you have to be seen as a fashion like something really it's something to do with your fashion like nothing to do being if anything like you wouldn't get invited if you're on a reality show kim only started to get invited i think because of kanye yeah it's true and then kendall and kylie obviously got the invite and
Starting point is 00:16:56 then now they're all going fascinating it really is just i would love i would love what would you prefer the metal the oscars, the Met or the Oscars? Oh, the Met, 100%. The Met lose, apparently. They're just, like, iconic. Yeah, same. Okay. Oh my God, imagine.
Starting point is 00:17:11 Just being a waiter there. How do we become a waiter? Can we apply to be a waitress? Oh my God, can we become a waitress? Or I sometimes think, like, I would just be, you know, the person to put people in the chairs because then you fully get to, like,
Starting point is 00:17:23 talk to them and touch them. Yeah. I'd be like... You get to be so up close have a look at that makeup let's have a look i know i was thinking how caked it must be i know as in like not in a bitch way but they cake it so that you can't see a thing the pictures they look really good yeah yeah so it's like bait bait that's the word so you put a layer on then you put it so then you put the powder on then you put the start from fresh and you do it about four times how no you're lying to me yes melissa if you saw them up real it's like that thick i don't that's horrible i just feel like hayley wouldn't
Starting point is 00:17:55 have that though she's so now i know hayley apparently like when she gets ready it's like it's like the thinnest layer and they're like this is gonna last half an hour so she's got to get in and out of the red carpet. It's so thin. Really? Yeah. Have you not watched her YouTube video on it? Where they, like, talk and they're doing her makeup. I think she's getting ready.
Starting point is 00:18:12 What's that one with the short, that white, like, YSL suit dress situation? Anyway, it was one of these, like, Oscar situations and they would, the makeup artist was like, it's so thin, so she can, like,
Starting point is 00:18:23 it only lasts, like, half an hour on her and then it's gone oh my god why is she so beautiful I know okay we need to do our follow we've got follow
Starting point is 00:18:34 fuck we've got follow ups fuck offs oh we've got some fuck ups from you guys we've got some follow ups
Starting point is 00:18:39 from you guys which we love do you want to read the first one yeah hey hey my lovelies love the podcast I'm just following up from the question about my boyfriend of 11 months only posting me
Starting point is 00:18:48 on his close friends i remember this so he wouldn't post to anywhere else apart from close friends sneaky okay i just spoke with him now about it in person and he just said it's because he never really posts on his stories or post photos which i do get to be honest but if i asked if he would post me or why he hasn't and he said he would now so I guess it has more of a thing of me not asking I did say to him that it gives me the vibe that he wants to appear single and he said that he that that wasn't the case and he just genuinely didn't use it that much so I guess that's okay and you know what boys don't use their social media yeah and they don't think about things like we do they're not as complex
Starting point is 00:19:24 I don't think they're playing games so that's really good that you followed up and glad that we solved that situation for you lovely well done good for just confronting that head on yeah exactly and now like the anxiety's gone you and also now you can make a joke out of it and be like take a photo of me put it on your social media yeah yeah yeah like you or you can just take a nice picture and be like right give me a phone i'm gonna post on your instagram right now yeah exactly stomach fandu casino daily jackpots guaranteed to hit by 11 p.m with your chance at the number one feeling winning which beats even the 27th best feeling saying i do who wants this last parachute i do daily jackpots a chance to win with every spin and a guaranteed winner by 11 p.m every day Oh, this is a dilemma. at canada.casino.fandu.com. Please play responsibly.
Starting point is 00:20:28 Oh, this is a dilemma. We're jumping straight in. So dilemma one is fashion advice. I've been invited to a wedding this summer in the Amalfi, Italy. Lovely. I'm pretty confident dressing for UK weddings, but it's going to be 28 plus degrees and we'll be outside at midday.
Starting point is 00:20:44 Any outfit fashion advice would be a dream so I'm really struggling to find anything that's suitable and not white or cream thanks girls love the podcast um I would do a short dress because it's just too hot to do not too short but like I would do like above knee vibe yeah you want to get that breeze in or I would do a really loose I'd actually do a loose maxi probably like you know really stringy really really loose yeah like just a beach maxi and you could put yeah obviously i wouldn't yeah the white cream vibe isn't absolutely no but you could do like light blue light pink yellow you could do light green flowers can't you yeah flowers yeah cream with flowers on it's fine i would still i would still feel uncomfortable doing that just because i'm so
Starting point is 00:21:23 paranoid about people saying that it's too close but um yeah i think any lighter colors it's fine. I would still feel uncomfortable doing that just because I'm so paranoid about people saying that it's too close. But yeah, I think any lighter colours, it's fine. Do not go down the navy or the black route because the sun will just... I also think black's a bit of a no-go so I'm not wearing black. Same, I do.
Starting point is 00:21:36 I do. Unless it's a really wintry wedding in the UK, it's never fine. I would do... I would look at maxis because I literally think you don't have to wear a pair of pants like you don't wear any underwear they're so floaty do you know what i mean by the
Starting point is 00:21:49 one side like the triangle boobs yeah like so drapey they don't clean so so so dry and like if you catch a bit of wind it'll blow up like yeah yeah and also you're shaded that way so your legs kind of in the shade so you're being called at the same time reformation is just a really good place for wedding guest dresses yeah try reformation or i'm trying to think of something else i think asos probably have a good selection or there's so many um sustainable hiring places now like by rotation her there's loads hire me hire her address dress her there's shit loads of them so i'd actually hire a dress maybe the problem is with that i do understand that you don't get to try it on and also for me i need everything taking it so i can't hire dresses because i'm like oh we need the waist pinning or i need to have taken up
Starting point is 00:22:34 because i'm so bloody short and then obviously you can't do that if you're renting a dress so i would maybe um leave yourself enough time to be able to try something on or whatever and yeah suss out yeah or get a dress that you can wear again like whenever i buy dresses i'm like i'm gonna need to be able to wear this dress again like over and over and over again yeah another thing also i would do really dewy makeup probably won't put any powder on and bring a facial mist we love a facial mist good idea and a fan and it's a lovely a lovely um fan situation and lovely maybe a hat i yourself a lovely a lovely fan situation and lovely
Starting point is 00:23:06 maybe a hat I mean a hat is obviously a very weddingy thing but like something just to block the sun off your face
Starting point is 00:23:12 I just think a hat they don't look quite right with a maxi dress unless you wear a big floppy hat and then she's going to have hat hair no but what are those
Starting point is 00:23:19 hats that people wear to weddings like it's a lot of weddings it's like you have to wear a hat sort of situation do you know those weddings yeah but I don't very formal i don't like that there
Starting point is 00:23:28 okay guys no one have a wedding where you have to wear a hat but like what a fascinator i would not be that's the word fascinating no that's a bit much melissa yeah it's a fascinator like those little things on top of your head no they're not my vibe i don't like them i'm trying to think if i had to wear a hat to a wedding what i would do i'd wear a big floppy one yeah but then it does sometimes actually i think hats have the reverse effect so it's cooling on your body and your face then i take it off my hat my head is so like sweaty underneath yeah yeah yeah and i'm like it just looks bad because i wear i wear a hat every single day because of sun exposure and I just always take it off and I'm like, ugh, I look terrible now.
Starting point is 00:24:08 Yeah, it does. I mean, look at me. This is the situation I'm going to be in for the rest of the week. The hat is staying on. Yeah, mine stayed on the whole time. So you can get really nice like rattan fans that look really cute
Starting point is 00:24:19 that you can like fit in your handbag when you're not using it. I think fans are so chic, yeah. Yeah, I would take a fan. Yeah, fan is key. that is such a good bit of advice also also do not moisturize your body before going out in the sun i've made that mistake do it but leave it enough time to soak in if you haven't let it soaked in that's when it starts to get sticky and horrible but you sweat so much and moisturizer clogs your pores, so you're just, it keeps the heat in.
Starting point is 00:24:45 Are you talking about your face or your body? Body. What? Really? I've never heard that. Yeah, unless you use a really thin... But you have to put sun cream on. Put your sun cream on, kids. You don't want to be out in 28 degrees, because a wedding can actually go on for quite a long time. Yeah. And the sun, you probably will get a bit burnt.
Starting point is 00:25:00 Yeah, maybe just put sun cream on and try and get a really... Look how sensible we're being about this. We're taking this dilemma very seriously. And also taking this dilemma very seriously sun cream fan she's only asked about what she needs to wear we've literally gone through every category i think also i'm still going on um i think also um okay i'm gonna stop there because i yeah yeah we could go on forever we can't go on forever okay because you're thinking about your own hot wedding, so you're almost, like, going through the logistics a bit, right? Yeah, like, what I'm going to tell everyone to do. The details.
Starting point is 00:25:33 Okay, dilemma two. Hey, girls, love the pod. I have a dilemma. Little bit of background. I've been in a relationship for eight months. However, we were friends for years prior and completely head over heels for him. Oh, that's sweet.
Starting point is 00:25:50 I literally do everything i can to please him as i feel as as i feel i am majorly punching oh my gosh very much lacking in self-confidence however i do so much for him i'm starting to feel like his mother and the effort is not completely reciprocated from his end don't get me wrong he does do stuff however i'm at the stage of buying little presents to cheer him up doing all his washing and cooking for him every night does this mean i like him more than he likes me or is he too comfortable and i'm doing too much too early i really need some advice from both sides i think in relationships some people are givers and some people not takers but like if received me receive us and also just like don't overthink it i think you're overthinking it you obviously enjoy cooking for him you obviously enjoy if you don't stop it that's an issue but if you enjoy getting him presents cooking yeah watching for him you're not doing anything wrong and he's not
Starting point is 00:26:36 because he's not asking you to do that you're choosing to do that and you enjoy it if you're doing it and you don't enjoy it and he's asking you to do it there's an issue there so so agree I think it's so fine like you know Jamie doesn't know how to cook I like cooking for him I enjoy it he will be like oh I'll cook for us I don't want him to cook I don't like his food so I like to do the cooking so there's not an issue there but if he was like Sophie cook for me every night and I was like like Sophie cook for me every night and I was like can you cook for me and he's like no then I would be like that's a bit right yeah so I think it's so fine if you're happy doing it and that brings you joy and you're literally doing
Starting point is 00:27:13 it out of choice and he's not nagging you to cook for him that's fine but then the other half of this is she does feel like it's not reciprocated in other ways so like your love language is obviously like back to Travis you're like doing things for him um but you're not feeling like it's reciprocated in any other like love language way so he does little things but you maybe you need more of something back back from him like there's nothing worse I actually feel like we actually have yeah two people that we know which is like a similar yes situation to this where she will do above and beyond everything and he doesn't really give much so I think that that's a difficult one and I think you need to take a step back and just be like is there actually anything wrong with the relationship and do you feel like you're
Starting point is 00:27:59 overcompensating for your like insecurities which you shouldn't feel like you shouldn't need to do that and like you shouldn't be insecure because he wouldn't be in a relationship with you and you wouldn't be with him if it wasn't right yeah he didn't love you and want to be with you so I would um maybe it would make you feel actually weirdly more confident if you weren't doing as much for him because you're almost doing so much that you're expecting more from him at this point do you know what I mean and you give so much and you're like right well now I need this back yeah I'm not getting it back because you're going above and beyond maybe I don't know yeah I think that's so true and I think I have seen it you know some girls are super romantic and you know they'll but yeah i'm not that romantic like i don't write gushy
Starting point is 00:28:46 cards i just don't need them it doesn't do i like it's sweet but it just it's just not in my blood and but some of my friends like that if they don't get a card you know that really affects them they need you know a valentine's card or they need a birthday card like i don't need that and then i think me and sophie are so similar like that how funny yeah we really are almost like don't bother with the card literally just write me a text i love you yeah i don't need you that's lovely that'll do me if you're not around but neither's right or wrong but you just have to think in your head not every yeah you can't expect things from people i think or it's tricky when you do expect things from people yeah don't don't expect everyone to have the same mindset as you because
Starting point is 00:29:25 yeah he won't be yeah the same it's the love languishing that's so true everyone's got a different love language but then again there has to be some other form of love language like what exactly so you have to receive it in another way so maybe he's not going to cook for you but he should be doing it by i don't know words of affirmation or like being affectionate with you or something like you should feel the love back in another way yeah and so it feels balanced I think that's where the issue comes because I think if everyone felt you it doesn't matter what each person's love language is you just need to feel it from some form yeah so what's our advice I think don't put too much pressure on yourself and I feel like you're overcompensating because you have this insecurity that you think that you're punching which is so
Starting point is 00:30:11 silly you're overcompensating by being like right well I've got to do this this and this because he's so much better than me and like I would stop that take a step back cook for him when you feel like it and you want to enjoy it and you want to have like a nice meal together every now and then or whatever but as you say you're not his mum you don't need to do his washing pimp you don't need to cook for him unless you really want to and don't you shouldn't be doing it because you want to make up for your insecurities as such because that's just not healthy and you should not feel insecure no you shouldn't and yeah yeah I do he'll love you like and he wouldn't be with you if um he didn't love you right so I so agree and I agree with everything I think eight months is very early
Starting point is 00:30:53 to do all his washing and cooking I'm just gonna put it out there there's no way in hell you're gonna catch me doing Toby's washing no maybe if he came to my house he was like oh shit I've just spilt something down my top I'd wash it for him but i wouldn't go over to his house and be like right oh what are you washing piles imagine what are your whites your darks and your undies right give me your dad's washing but it is very sweet of you but no and look i do think it you know yeah that obviously doesn't provide you yeah but getting little presents i do i am a fool i do do that so do you melissa i do that i do that with everybody it's terrible well it's not terrible that's obviously my love language yeah it's true you do do that you do it with me for sure
Starting point is 00:31:33 okay dilemma three hi girls want to start by saying i love the podcast so much and i've been listening every wednesday i love you too love you too I'm stuck in a position at the moment I doubt I'm the only one this in this stage of my life. I'm 24 graduated uni and I've been in a corporate job for just over a year. It's fine but purely a stepping stone to where I want to be as I need two years experience to apply for the career I really want to do. This means I have a year left in a job I don't really enjoy on a pretty rubbish salary considering the amount of work I'm doing I'm struggling to stay motivated not only in the work but it's spreading into my mindset infecting other aspects of my life I feel like I really need a new focus
Starting point is 00:32:14 to keep me motivated for the next year I'm in a new relationship which is going so well I have good friends around me but I just feel like something is missing and I'm not sure what to do keep an arm if possible and thanks any advice opinions you can give me Melissa over to you okay so I would look at this as you are obviously a very hard working person you've got big aspirations which I admire so much because I've never had like a set career path in my brain yeah and I've never been someone who's like this is what I'm desperate to I've got to do this two years experience then I'm there so I know that so this two years of like working in this job is obviously not stimulating you enough and it's probably getting you a bit like you feel a bit bored it sounds like with this job and you're like oh don't really feel like fulfilled I would look
Starting point is 00:32:58 at it as if it's obviously you said it's a stepping stone to where you really want to be and that's your dream I would stick it out because in the long run, it's only two years, you're so young, you're 24. And I would look at it like school. School, we've all had to do it for however many fucking years of our lives. None of us really liked it. It was a stepping stone. And you just accept it. And you're like, right, I've just got to accept it because everyone's got to go to school. Yeah. And this is how we're going to get to the point that we want to be at when, you know, we leave school and we can get a job and whatever. I would look at it like that.
Starting point is 00:33:29 I don't think you should beat yourself up over thinking that you should feel so outrageously inspired and happy by this two years experience. It's two years experience and then you're going to be in your dream job. And it sounds like you've come so far already. Like you've done the uni thing. Yeah. I wouldn't sort of give up on it. and it sounds like in like your personal life everything else is going so well right like I mean not everyone is obsessed with their jobs when they first start out and
Starting point is 00:33:55 they're like I've just got to stick it out it's like doing law from a uni it's so long and also I wouldn't like put so much pressure on yourself because even if you know you get to this and then you get your dream job in two years after this and then you're like oh I'm still not satisfied actually enjoying this I thought I would yeah you change and like that happens so much like it's no no one it's like you know in the movies it's like oh everyone you do this and then there's a blueprint for everyone I really don't think that happens in real life yeah every single journey and chapter like you may meet the love of your life in this experience job or whatever and then the next you know it's all a journey yeah and it is all a journey trust your process and I don't think
Starting point is 00:34:35 that you should overthink it too much and be like I should be so in love with this process right now and you want to think it's only temporary it's literally like so many people don't really like their uni but you know they're like you know what I've got to get this degree so I can do the job I want to do when I leave yeah it's just like that and like if you've got other things going on around you that you really really love I personally my advice if you were my friend I would be like stick at it come on same you've worked so hard this is your which is where you want to go in your career this is just what you've got to do yeah you'd be so disappointed in yourself if you like yeah and you look back and you're like god i could have just stuck out for another year if it was five years i think our advice maybe would be
Starting point is 00:35:12 different but two years in the grand scheme of things is not long it's it will fly by especially if you've got like fun things going on outside of your workplace right i'm just gonna start on not so single diaries because i've just got to get out obviously we touched on it briefly we've um got this big family holiday so this is a big step for us this is a big step so he's meeting well no he's met everyone apart from your grandparents yeah yeah he's met everyone and then the grandparents will be so sweet and so wholesome but it's as in like it's just the pressure of like spending like six days with like family and people do you know what I mean like it's a long old stick no he'll love it it's so lovely you'll have the best time I know I'm really excited I think it will like solidify your love for each other even though it's very solidified anyway it's funny
Starting point is 00:35:58 yeah carry on it does bring you to like another level I do think yeah like when I did the Easter I think how many nights was that maybe two or three that was like oh god like I'm so much more in love with him like when I came away from that with his family it's weird isn't it how you have that he'll have that maybe he feels that way about me he's not like get me away from this mental no he won't he'll have the fun I the fun it's so good your brother's coming out and your sister and like your brother's girlfriend
Starting point is 00:36:27 there's a really nice dynamic takes the pressure off as well at just being like totally strange because Mimi's there which is nice
Starting point is 00:36:33 yeah yeah yeah massively and he'll feel that as well for sure yeah um what's mine oh right so you talk about
Starting point is 00:36:40 can we talk about your sorry I just have to talk about it um Tom who's Sophie's sister's fiance yeah and it was so sweet georgia and i'm like this is and also jamie like is so adhd and tom
Starting point is 00:36:56 is also quite like they don't sit down so they really it's like one thing from the other it was like tennis then go play golf then just jump in the pool then go do this then go do that then throw a ball together oh god so having children to entertain yeah it's like having children the whole time
Starting point is 00:37:09 but at least it's not on me anymore I was like oof you guys me and my sis were like lovely we can just sit and read for a minute relax yeah
Starting point is 00:37:15 sit by the pool have a glass of rose have a G&T yeah yeah gorgeous it was so gorgeous very sweet and they kept like
Starting point is 00:37:24 you know when like boys like have inside jokes they just laugh the whole time sweet and they kept like you know when like boys like have in inside jokes they just laugh the whole time yeah what but it's actually so sweet i was like and then second exciting thing i'm actually the minute i finish this i've got a call with um a wedding dress designer she's done sketching for me so i'm jumping off this i really should take these i i've got like you know under eye mask on I've got that yeah guys
Starting point is 00:37:46 she's always like roadie all nip and fab whatever they are what are they one on one skins stunning rose
Starting point is 00:37:53 lovely so that's mine get planning that wedding get planning that wedding and then next week a week to a week yesterday go look at the venue
Starting point is 00:38:01 oh my god this is the part I'm most excited about my mum's been non-stop asking me about Sophie's wedding and the venue. Oh, my God. This is the part I'm most excited about. My mum's been non-stop asking me about Sophie's wedding and the venue. I'm like, I don't know. I know. You have to send me the links so I can show her. Oh, yeah.
Starting point is 00:38:12 I was just thinking, I don't think I've sent it to you. No, you've shown me, like, on your phone, but I haven't, like, obviously been sent it. Yeah, I'll send you the email then you can look at it. Because I'm going to go look at them all. Because there's, like, five. And then you can tell me. Oh, my God. This is just beyond exciting.
Starting point is 00:38:25 So beyond exciting. And also I've had ideas about wedding bridesmaid dresses. Oh my God. It has to go with the bad news. We've got to wait till we see it. Okay, okay, okay, okay, bye. Sunny.
Starting point is 00:38:38 So exciting. Okay, bye guys. Love you so much. Thank you so much for listening. Thank you for listening. Love guys. Bye guys. Thank you so much for listening. Thank you for listening. Bye. FanDuel Casino's exclusive live dealer studio has your chance at the number one feeling, winning,
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Starting point is 00:39:27 Please play responsibly. That's it for this week, Wednesdays. But God, don't you just fancy some more, Melissa? Yeah, I'd really love a follow-up to some of those dilemmas. I want to know what happens. Well then, tinies, we have got some news for you. We have launched a premium version of Wednesdays. Now listen, subscribers get access to the podcast ad-free with bonus episodes.
Starting point is 00:39:52 It's pretty amazing. It's also packed full of Dilemma follow-ups, which we love, and some of our more personal stories and recommendations. And it's super easy. You just listen on your favorite app. How cool is that? Amazing. And all the info is in the episode description and in our Insta bio.

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