Weird Medicine: The Podcast - 001 - RiotCast Rules: An Introduction

Episode Date: May 14, 2012

In this episode, we introduce the idea of "Weird Medicine" and review the history of the show while playing a million old testicle and toe-jam questions from the original XM 202 live show. Along the way we take live phone calls about why low-carb diets cause constipation (answer: hell if I can figure it out), medical uses of urine (there are none, basically...OOPS I GAVE IT AWAY), Saturday night palsy, night sweats and some other crap. Oh, and we discuss why we're still not professional broadcasters after 5 years of doing this and then prove it with one flub after another. HA! Welcome to the new RiotCast show; I'm sure the network is thrilled that they signed a couple of idiots from Tennessee, medical license or no. enjoy!  yr obt svt,  Steve Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

You're listening to Weird Medicine with Dr. Steve on the Riotcast Network, riotcast.com. Weird medicine contains mature content and may be offensive to some listeners. I've got diphtheria crushing my esophagus. I've got Ebola spripping from my nose. I've got the leprosy of the heart valve, exacerbating my impeccable. exacerbating my incredible woes I want to take my brain out blast with the wave

an ultrasonic, agographic and a pulsating shave I want a magic pill for my ailments The health equivalent is citizen cane And if I don't get it now in the tablet I think I'm doomed then I'll have to go insane I want to requiem for my disease So I'm paging Dr. Steve

Dr. Steve You'll take the careful Yo-hum, ho, hoary-ho from the if you're not hereafter what I'm here after you'll be here after I'm gone capital of the world it's weird medicine the first and still only uncensored medical show in the history of radio now a podcast I'm Dr. Steve with my little pal P.A. John. Hello John. Oh shit. I'd help if I turn it. Boy, this is Rocky. Our first show for the riot cast network. Hello, Steve. And I'm already effing it off. And we also have in the studio, GVAC, the lovely and talented. Good evening, boys. And addidectomy Todd, the master barber with multiple penis tattoos on his arm.

How you doing, bro? And in the studio audience, we have Todd's lovely wife, Ashley. Hello, Ashley. Hello. She's actually running the chat room. But if you're listening to this on Riotcast, it's pre-recorded. So we'll give out the numbers to call if you have a medical question, all that kind of stuff. This is a show for people who would.

never listened to a medical show on the radio or on the internet. If you have a question, you're embarrassed to take to your regular medical provider. If you just can't find an answer anywhere else, give us a call at 347-7-66-4-3-23. That's 347. No, no, I knew you were going to do that. It's not. It's poo-head.

What? Okay, here's the thing. Okay, let me turn the music off. I'm going to tell you why. When we're recording this live, and by the way, you need to be watching for the Skype calls to come through. When we're recording it live, we will take calls on 423-343-8-8-8-8-4. Okay, this is confusing. So what I planned on doing was just leaving that up for people who come to our U-Stream channel to see.

But if you want to leave a voicemail so that we'll answer it on the show, the number is 347-76-4-3-23. That's local to Manhattan. It's 347 Pooh-Head. That makes it easy to remember. I'm a medical professional, a grown man, and I chose Pooh Head to be our number. So if you're listening to us live, give us a call at the other number, the 423 di Tutti. But if you're listening to us pre-recorded and you want to leave a voicemail, call us on the 347-7664323 number. I know it's confusing.

We'll work it out. the the thing I would like to do with this is if you call with your cell phone pull over so that we don't get a lot of road noise try to get the audio as good as you can but if you call with your cell phone it really helps because I will text you back until we get to the point where I'm just completely inundated with phone calls I'll try I try to text back everybody I'm behind by about 200 phone calls right now so I'm working on I'm trying to work through them We're not inundated yet. Yeah. Well, what I can do now, what happened was when we went on vacation over Christmas, we didn't record for like six weeks, and that's when I got way, way, way behind. So what I'm doing now is those people, I kind of said, oh, well, fuck you. We're not going to answer your calls.

You lose. They're probably dead by now anyway. What's funny is I do try to work through those old calls, and every once in a while, you know, I'll text somebody and answer to their question. And they'll say, wait a minute, who is this? And I'll say, it's Dr. Steve, you texted me. And they said, well, dude, it was like four months ago. But I'm trying, I promise.

So anyway, there you go. If you want to check out our podcast, go to riotcast.com, or go to our website at weirdmedicine.com for medical news and stuff you can buy. Or go to Cafe Press slash Weird Medicine for Stupid Merchandise. We're working on transitioning our merchandise. away from Cafe Press into another site, so stay tuned for that. Really, the only thing we're going to have

is the only thing that ever sells, which is our Bristol Stool Scale mug, which is basically a mug with all of our names on it, and then pictures of fecal matter that you can grade depending on their consistency. So while you're drinking your morning, Joe, and sitting on the pot,

you can grade your stools, and keep a diary. Do whatever you want to with the data. I don't care. But it can be most fascinating past time. Most importantly, though, we are not your medical providers. Take everything you hear with a grain of salt. Don't act on anything you hear on this show without talking it over with your doctor, nurse practitioner, physician's assistant, pharmacist, master barber, or guy that sells you use car parts. So one of the things that I thought we would do since this is our first show

for the new network. And anybody who happens to be listening from Twitter, I guess I just realized that we're not supposed to be talking about that we're doing this for Riotcast. Oh, well, it's too late. So I'm kind of blowing it, but I figure there's probably 40 people who actually are listening right now live

because I just tweeted it out on my Twitter and this isn't a scheduled show, so I think we're okay. But what I thought we would do is play a little bit of the introduction to weird medicine that we first,

made for Sirius XM when we made the transition from XM Radio to Sirius XM Radio. We had new bosses, and we had to basically repitch our show to them. And I have that somewhere here. Wait. What? What? Yeah, yeah, what, dude. You mean this isn't going to be on TMZ or Entertainment Tonight or CNN?

What? I thought this was groundbreaking news. And you just blew it. I did, break it. I did blow it. I probably fucked up really bad, actually. Although, you know, I think they want to make this announcement, and it's like, it's just us. Who cares, really?

I mean, ultimately, who cares? I think we'll be all right. But I hope so, anyway. You got like four fans out there creaming their pants because you're on riot cast. No. Yeah, you do. Woodfloor's cream. No, it's seven.

Including double vasectomy, Todd, and Jeffrey. The Scheister on Third Mike. John, people sometimes wonder how a medical show could thrive on XM202-slash Sirius 197. Do you remember doing this now? No. We did this. When did the merger happen? Was it three, four years ago?

You know, I'm trying to remember exactly when the date was. So I had to make this 15-minute introduction to weird medicine to play for the bosses so they can hear it. But I thought we'll listen to it. It may be hilariously stupid, or it may just be boring. If it's boring, we'll just tell the story ourselves. And on the surface, it does seem like a weird fit. Yeah. But in the end, no pun intended, it works,

as these snippets from our first studio appearance on Opian Anthony prove. I got to tell you, like, we have a lot of people that stop by and say hi. And in between commercials during the other side of the show, Anthony and Jimmy ran off to meet Dr. Steve. And I'm thinking to myself, man, you know, these guys never run off to meet anybody. No. But Dr. Steve is in house, and you guys ran off to see. say hi to him.

Steve is legendary. Absolutely. Well, can I call and ask chlamydia and hepatitis questions, too? Doc, walk us through it.

Let us know what you're doing. Take your time, please. First, I'm approaching the area. Okay. Well, he sure is. This is the first time of, okay, let's give it a little background.

We were sitting there in the studio on the bleachers. This was at the old XM studio with Opie and Anthony. Now, Opie, when he first commented on that, that's when they were doing the radio show on Terrestrial. So we were at the...

Yes, we went to the old... We went to Howard Stern's old studio. Oh, wow. Hung out there for a while. And we first walked in, and then we did the walkover with him. And then Opie just walked by and he said, hey, is that Dr. Steve? While he's walking by going to do whatever he was doing,

and he just said, hey, we're going to get you on the other side, meaning we'll do, you're not for the CBS show. Right. You're for the XM show. So John and I just thought that we were going to sit in the bleachers and at one point they went to take a break and Ope says

we're, and next Dr. Steve's going to come in the studio and answer some of your medical questions and I was like, what? No clue because they're not real like plan ahead kind of guys. I figured we'd sit on the bleachers and Danny would

come out with a mic and we could plug our show which we were going to do. And we had a deal to do a single show for a serious exam. It was part of the pest golden ticket. I think we were the only ones that ever did anything with that. Where Opie had said, you know, if the pests have an idea for a show, just, you know, send it in and we'll see what we can do.

So I immediately sent in the idea for this show. Steve Carleasy emailed me back immediately. He said, I love this show, the idea a lot. Let's see what happens. And then Opie Green lit it, you know, a couple weeks later. So anyway, we had a deal to do a 90-minute show at 10.30 to midnight. And we just figured that we would go in there and sit on the bleachers. Anyway, so he called us in.

And the next thing I know, Opie's looking at me going, now are you one of those doctors that sticks their finger up people's asses? And I'm like, oh, yeah, yeah, I do that all the time. He said, well, can you do it here now? And I was like, well, no, I don't have a license to practice medicine in New York. And they said, oh, that's not a problem. We're just playing around. We're just being silly.

And I said, well, I would need gloves. And I figured that surely they don't have gloves. And then Than, Brian, at the time, goes, flunk, and thunks down this box of latex gloves next to me. I said, well, and really I would have to do it with lube. And then clunk on the other side of me, Thane had this pack of lube. It was some strawberry-flavored lube from some fucking place. I couldn't get out of it.

So, anyway, so that's what's going on. I'm separating the buttocks, the radial region. I'm placing my finger on the rectum up. Yeah. Fah! Ha! Head up. And now we are examining the prostate, sweeping from left to the right, up and down, feels normal.

And we're done. Thank God. That was the great Pat Duffy, by the thing. Oh, God. Is you go see? Yeah. Actually, I got a comment here. He sounds like Adam West.

Adam West? Yes. Oh, yeah. Batman. The original. Batman. Catwoman. He does impressions.

He's got a finger in your hands. He does these impersonations. And if you're not coming from the process, you think he was the real people. You know what? I think for the first time I'm going to listen to 202 on a Saturday night. Now, the fact that we're in... That was huge.

huge, by the way. You remember when he said that? And for Greg Opie Hughes to say something like that, to us at that time, that was a huge boost. Now, that night, we show up to do the first show and who's standing there. But Anthony and his girlfriend, Melinda, and I'm like, what are you guys doing here? He's like, oh, I'm just figured I'd hang out and watch you do your show. And again, I'm like, what? Because I'm sitting in his seat. John is sitting in Norton's seat, right? And here we are doing a show in their studio in front of him. And what was great about it was after it was over, he walked up to us. We could hear him laughing, and they laughed at all the right places, and they went, ooh, and all the right places. And he came up to us and said that was the best first show I've ever heard in my life,

and that was just fucking huge. And then all hell broke loose in the studio outside, which I won't tell that story. Maybe someday we'll tell that story. But we went from being on cloud nine to being in the shit dumpster within 30 seconds because something was going on out in the outer studio that was uncool. But anyway, I'll just tease that for a future show. Uncensored medical show doesn't mean that we talk like. shock jocks and drop gratuitous f bombs i mean that used to be true

what show are we doing now that used to be true when we first started i used to yell at john for saying fuck on the air and uh yeah because it was like dude we're uncensored because the our clients can call in or our you know listeners can call in and ask questions and we don't have to censor them but we should remain reasonably professional somewhere over the last five years i kind of dropped it down john wore you down i think that's what it was i realized he was getting all the yucks the way i like to explain it is it means we can answer any question our listeners have without regard to content right we found that we don't have to be funny right the material is interesting and generally funny on its own right ultimately our listeners know they can

ask us anything especially things they'd be uncomfortable asking the regular medical providers. And by the way, one of our, we do have a couple of policies on this show, and one is that we try not to ever make anybody sorry that they called us. You know, so if it, we, we fart around a lot on the show, but we do answer our medical questions, at least at some point during the answering of the question, we will give out real medical advice. Although, this is an entertainment show for entertainment purposes. only so take everything we say with a grain of salt because you know we're answering stuff off the cuff a lot of times especially when we're taking live calls and you just

never know we may say something wrong so you know double check everything but we try to give out good information but if you call with a 12 Barbie heads shoved up your ass that you have difficulty getting out we will make fun of you absolutely and rightly so my stomach just erupts like a fire hydrant in the South Bronx in July. Yeah. I mean, what is the deal with the IBS? Can you just explain a little bit about what is actually happening and how to prevent it? I had a best to talk to me about a week ago.

Yes. And besides, the right side seems way more bruised than the left side. Is that normal? Yes. On my testicles, I have swollen, clawed, sebaceous glands. Yes. And? I'm trying to figure out, can you get rid of them?

I had a vasectomy about a year and a half, two years ago, and now my wife is thinking that I should go and have it reversed, and I was wondering about how complex is that procedure, and how painful it, you know, how long is it going to take? Well, I recently had a vasectomy, and in fact the stitches aren't quite healed up yet, and I've got sort of under the right stitches. I've got this little blob.

It's almost like a little growing third nut. By the way, just in case you didn't know, that is double Vez-X-Me-Tot. He was one of the first callers. No way. I didn't even recognize myself. Yeah, I did right away. Yeah. Wow.

I remember the call, but I didn't recognize my own voice. Yeah, that was you. Let's run that back, because you do sound different. And that's that whole thing with old recordings always make you sound like your voice is higher. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Compression and all that is different. Complex is that procedure and how painful it, you know, How long is it going to take?

Well, I recently had a vasectomy, and in fact, the stitches aren't quite healed up yet, and I've got sort of under the right stitches. I've got this little blob. It's almost like a little growing third nut. Hello? You're on weird medicine. What can we do for you? Yeah, I got a question.

My girlfriend's kind of adventurous, and her new thing she wants me to do is she wants me to lick her ass. And I'm kind of wondering what the dangers or what could happen to me or what's the worst-case scenario or if it's sanitary at all. sure well it's no it's it's absolutely not sanitary wait a minute i'm sorry that was a good line sorry i couldn't i couldn't wait on that one so what is the danger we heard it thank you hang on a second hey we got a phone call area code 207 you're on weird medicine hey dr steve is it true that urine will cure athletes foot we got asked that question on the very first show. And it's interesting that people use urine for a lot of different things.

And I saw recently on my strange addiction, this woman who bathes in urine and drinks it and all this stuff. And we've heard of boxers and stuff that will drink their own urine because they don't want to lose the vitamins because you piss out B vitamins. Well, guess what? When you do that, you're going to piss them out again. So if you want to take a fucking vitamin, just take a fucking vitamin. Don't drink urine. Well, urine has uric acid in it, which is where it gets its name from. And there are people that will use uric acid for, I'm sorry, urea.

Scratch everything I just said. We've been drinking all night. So they will use urea on thickened toenails to soften the, soften the toenails so that they can be scraped off or bird down, okay? So urea sinks into the skin and kind of hydrates the skin. Do you use it? You're nodding your head, Todd. So do you guys use ureta for this?

I don't use it at all in barbering. He just pisses on people's toenail. But I like to piss on people's feet. No, I'm just sort of familiar with the chemistry because I went through barber school. I don't know what that would do to tissue. That's awesome. So urea, and that's where this myth came from that urine will kill athletes' foot. because actually urine, to my knowledge, unless you've taken an antifungal pill that is excreted in your urine,

will not have any antifungal effects. But it will hydrate the skin and make it look healthier, but that's not the same thing. So, yeah, don't piss on your feet. Just go buy some lammocil over the counter and put it on your feet. Now, if it won't go away, after using lammocil, that's a good reason to go see a doctor. okay dude gotcha all right man

I'm pissing on my foot then no don't piss on your foot you can I mean thanks doctor okay we wouldn't hurt him would it all right no it wasn't hurt was it was it just because he was on the phone

that we were echoing back did you hear I heard a little bit I think he was just he was listening to us at the same time all right because I was hearing us like a couple seconds back did you have something Ashley yeah we have somebody who might be calling

from area code 914 but he wanted to know basically are there any natural slash over-the-counter remedies for toe fungus Okay, well, area code 914 is calling right now. Perfect. Are you there? Hey, like, how are you going on?

Good, man. What's going on? Did she just steal your thunder? No, no, no, no, no. Well, there's a little bit more background to me. About a year ago, I had phytitis on my left foot, and I noticed that where the satellite had started on one of my toes, that toe now has fungus kind of growing around that toenail.

Okay. I was wondering if there are any, like, natural remedies, sort of like something over-the-counter stuff that I didn't have to go to the doctor to get a prescription for that would help with that. Okay, let me tell you some. And I'm having trouble with your audio. Are you listening to us on Ustream right now? No, I'm listening on a cell phone.

I'm talking to you on the cell phone. Okay, I know, but were you actually listening to the show on Ustream? Ashley's not in her head. Okay, let me knock you off and let you listen to it on the, on the computer because I'm having trouble with your audio, okay, dude? Okay, good, no problem.

Okay, yeah, we'll answer it, though. All right, I forgot what he was calling about. Next question. He said he had a study. I have to figure out how to ride the levels on Skype. That's my problem I'm having. Independently from our levels. I had toenail fungus.

I developed it when I was around 45, and my toenails became thickened and brittle. And so I tried every over-the-counter thing that I'd been told because I wanted to try them and see. One thing I tried was Vix Vapo rub. I was told to try that because it would sink through the nail and kill the fungus. I tried oil of oregano, okay, and I put that on there. Nothing.

Didn't work. What else did I try? I tried all kinds over-the-counter. countercrab, including lamacil, which does not sink into the nails. It's got to go all the way to the nail bed. That's the problem. When you put something on the nail, the fungus isn't, that's not the fungus that's the problem. It's the fungus right next to the nail bed, and so it would have to sink through that inch of thickened toenail. Yeah, well, you've got to think the toenail only exists to protect the nail bed, basically. Right. And the infection is actually between

the nail bed and the toenail itself. So putting stuff topically, uh, probably isn't going to be very effective, at least so far. What I ended up having to do was taking a pill every day called Lamacil. By the way, they make it in a pill form, and ran the risk of destroying my liver and getting fulminate liver failure to take this medication to kill the toenail fungus. And I also had to have my toenail removed. And now, and this is one of the problems with this is it takes about a year for your toenail to grow all the way out. And so you've really got to do something for a long, long time before you're going to see any effects.

And I think that's part of the problem. Maybe some of these over-the-counter things, I did it for two, three weeks, and then didn't see any effect and then quit. So I can't say for sure, all I can tell you is that there aren't any good studies out there showing that the topical over-the-counter stuff will do anything to kill toenail fungus. go see a podiatrist they're the experts at this stuff our friend dr scott who practices the traditional chinese medicine last time he was here remember he said a drop of white vinegar a day every day is what he on it toenails that's what he's full of shit on that one and he can't defend himself he's not here you are an awful human being i love scott he's a great guy but that's bullshit area code 718 you're on weird medicine

congratulate you on your new on your new podcast oh my god hey we got a celebrity calling he's not a celebrity no i love bobo dude how are you i'm doing good cool man what's going on i think ain't great you figure they call it to congratulate you guys on on a new podcast well we thank you very much just keep it to yourself what what we're doing okay because i kind of blew it on uh announcing this thing a little bit ahead of time but anyway that's And then I'm telling Bobo to keep a secret. All right, don't worry, I will. Okay, man.

Anything we can do for you tonight? No, that's it. Okay, all right. Well, cool, man. Thanks for calling. All right. You have a good thing. Thanks, Bobo.

Thanks, Bobo. Give our best to Mr. Malunigans. Take care. Ashley has such a crush on him. I totally love Bobo. Ashley's got a huge crush on Bobo. He's so sweet. He's a good little fowler.

Were you pointing at something? Well, I thought those were ones that you. Oh, they were, they were all calls that we missed. Keep calling. Okay, so I'm going to go back to the introduction to weird medicine. Under the right stitches, I've got this little blob. It's almost like a little growing third nut. Hello?

You're on weird medicine. What can we do for you? Yeah, I got a question. My girlfriend's kind of adventurous, and her new thing she wants me to do is she wants me to lick her ass. And I'm kind of wondering what the dangers or what could happen to me or what's the worst-case scenario or if it's sanitary at all. Sure. Well, it's, you know, it's absolutely not sanitary, but very little about sex is. Yeah, I was wondering, I'm only 27 years old, and I have this, like, kind of growth on my right testy. I'm just wondering, my girlfriend's into golden showers.

Okay. And she's been asking me to urinate inside of her while we're having intercourse. Okay. And I'm really hesitant. and I'm just wondering if there's any major concerns as far as, you know, some sort of infection or if it can be done and then douche afterwards, and that'll be fine. Are you otherwise healthy? Yes, absolutely. Okay, and are you diabetic?

No. Okay, then here's the thing. Urine is sterile. Very sterile. It should be very sterile. Normal urine is cell-free. It's just basically ultra-filtration byproducts of, you know, body metabolism, and it's mostly water, it's got some other chemicals in it,

and you can, I think, pee freely. At Weird Medicine, it's not all listener question. Dr. Steve and I are... I gave John this script. And on Weird Medicine, Dr. Steve and I talk about other stuff, too. is in it and you can I think pee freely

at weird medicine it's not all listener questions Dr. Steve and I are comfortable with celebrity interviews as well Oh that sounded That sounded so natural Yeah that was horrible You know

Here's the thing I couldn't do it any better today either Jesus And no mic technique in this studio either Hang on, I've got to hear that again. It's just basically ultra-filtration byproducts of, you know, body metabolism, and it's mostly water, it's got some other chemicals in it, and you can, I think, pee freely.

At Weird Medicine, it's not all listener questions. Dr. Steve and I are comfortable with celebrity interviews as well. Who says comfortable, comfortable? It's a four-syllable, four-syllable word. Comfortable. When you're reading it, absolutely. I've got to play it one more time. Jesus.

Edison, it's not all listener questions. Dr. Steve and I are comfortable with celebrity and Jews as well. We are talking to celebrity as a drug. Oh, a bunch of times. John. Yeah, he is. We sat here with him. Yeah.

Okay. No, John, yeah. John almost got Victoria's a Drach to hang up on us in the first two minutes of the interview. Because she didn't know who the hell we. were. I mean, who did? And I introduced her. I said a couple of words in Russian, and then she said some shit back to me that I didn't understand, and that

was uncomfortable. And so we're just kind of sitting there for a second, and then John goes, hey, you want to have a threesome? And just dead silence. Bindrop. Yeah, she didn't play into it or not. She was like, what? Who are these assholes?

And I gave John one of those looks. And then we just went on, and we ended up talking to her 45 minutes so we got over it we learned quickly yeah that yeah our first celebrity interview was earl douglas i felt comfortable talking to earl so he was the first guest we ever had uh we were supposed to have a guest on the first show which was eric sex man uh nagel and we bumped him you remember that it's and uh danny ross just absolutely loved that uh because uh on our very first show on our very first show on XM radio we bumped Eric

Nagel as our first guest whoever that was hung up oh well so anyway the author of Dr. Z on scoring and how to pick up seduce and hook up with hot women I've got to say one thing Dr. Z you've been a great guest I did do an IMDB search

on you because I do my research on our guests and I've got to ask you one thing and you don't sound like someone that's that's shy or retiring or would be embarrassed by this. Translation of a Russian film, but actually this was done since you've been in the United States. It's called Asses of Face Destruction.

So I thought this was some kind of, I thought it was a Russian film, and they just translated it poorly. I'd be interested in the plot of that film. Oh, God. You know what it was? It was actually, you know, this fetish video, you know, it's really, it doesn't have a whole lot of a plot, but it's the guys get, they get, I'm kind of playing the KGB agent who catches this guy. So there really is a plot. The world's quarter, but the bottom line is their torture is for me to sit on there, to smother them, to trample them or to sit on their faces. so they confess.

You're listening to Weird Medicine. I'm Dr. Steve with P.A. John, and P.A. Jill is somewhere around here. All right? Enough of that. We've heard enough, right? Yeah. That's a good introduction to this show. We have phone calls? Yeah, we've got a phone call. That's basically why I stop that.

Although, you know, I don't want to cut P.A. Jill's segment short. I can't remember what that was about. Do you remember? No, we could always listen to it. All right. We've got at least two hours. Okay. Area Code 508, you're on Weird Medicine. how we're doing tonight all right how are you i can't complain i'm running out of beer so we're going to be cutting this show real short real quick what can we do for you that it that is a medical

condition it's an emergency my question tonight is when i wake up in the middle of the night sometimes my arm is falling asleep like the whole entire arm from shoulder to hand okay what causes that? Well, it can be a couple of things. One thing is you may be just sleeping on it funny, and you can cut off the arterial supply to the arm by lying with your arm over your head. That's one way that can be done, and it seems like that wouldn't do anything, but weirdly we're not designed to keep our arm over our head for a long time, and the arterial supply

to the arm will be cut off enough that the nerves get shut down. And then what will sometimes happen with people is when they finally do move the arm, it's completely immobile, and they have to shift their body around, and the brain kind of recognizes that as, wow, this is not right, and it'll wake you up. And you'll have a numb, immobile arm that then when you do move it and the blood comes back, you get that crazy pins and needles effect with the nerves turning back on again that lasts for a couple of minutes. And then your arm goes back to normal again. That is exactly what happens I sleep with my arm over my head There you go, that's it

And somehow you've got to train yourself to not do that There is this weird thing called Saturday Night Palsy Do you want to talk about it, John? Well, I believe it's the I can't remember which nerve it is It's either the radial or the owner nerve Which one is it? It's the radial nerve, it's a radial nerve

And so you can It's been known for people that drink heavily to fall asleep on the arm and the radial nerve will get compressed down towards the wrist

and then when they wake up and they turn their hand over with the palm facing down the wrist just drops and they're unable to wave or lift the wrist and it can sometimes come back

sometimes it doesn't it depends on how long you lay on it so you can kill the nerve that way but the thing that he's talking about is a temporary thing and an interesting thing is that you can rob the arm of blood supply for a long long time and it will always recover how long what's the longest you guys have ever cut off blood supply to an arm to operate on it putting a tourniquet on it leave it on for about an hour and sometimes maybe an hour and a half yeah so and the and it basically if you do it

for an hour and it's beeping and you're in a critical stage, you'll leave it on, but no more than you try to stop it at around an hour, hour, and a half. So the arm can go without a blood supply for an hour, hour, and a half and suffer no damage whatsoever. Right. If done properly. So, yeah, that's what's going on, dude. I don't know what to tell you other than you've just got to tell your brain not to sleep that way if you want to do something about it. Otherwise, it probably going to hurt you, but it's always going to wake you up and, you know, your brain will figure it out that this is a problem I can't continue this I've got to wake this guy up and he's got to move his arm that's exactly what happens but I've always slept in the same way the same bed everything's been

the same so it's just style like in the last six months yeah well dude you're getting older what can I hate that I know I do too it time is a bitch I'll just start drinking more I guess okay man I'm not recommending that but I'm not saying it's a bad idea all right we'll see you Rist will fall asleep. That's right. All right. Thanks for calling out. Have a good one.

Okay, you too. What you got to ask? We have a question from poop helmet. Poop helmet. And he would like to know, he or she would like to know what causes night sweats. It could be a she. Yeah, we don't know. But it's not.

We hope not. Yeah, night sweats is, what I'm going to tell poop helmet to do is to email me at weird medicine xm at gmail.com. And I will send him or her. some information on night sweats. The reason is that it can be caused by things that you don't have to worry about, but every once in a while it can be caused by stuff you have to worry about. And that's a minority of the cases, but there is a specific workup for night sweats that doctors will do.

And I would, if it's something that started recently and is not a normal finding for poop helmet, I would recommend that poop helmet. I just can't stop saying that name. That's hilarious. Because when you first said it, it's like if that's not normal for poop helmet. Needs to see his or her doctor and say, look, I'm having night sweats. Okay.

But if he or she will email me, I'll send him or her some information. Imagine it's a really hot chick. I'm hoping it is. That's why I keep in. Hi, I'm poop helmet. What would be some of the, well, what would be some of the non-life-threatening issues? Well, some people with hormonal changes can have night sweats. Yeah.

So, you know, a woman going through menopause, if poop helmet happens to be a woman over 51. No, we don't want to know. It's more fun to not know. Okay. Then she could have night sweats. You know, I know it's not. Of course it's not. It's a guy that's trying to say that.

He practices anal intercourse. That's why he's called poop helmet. But we get that. So it was, but anyway. So I don't know, dude. You know, I don't want to alarm poop helmet. It's probably not anything serious, but I want him to email me. I know what it is.

You're sleeping with too heavy a cover. Instead they're waking up in the middle of the night, sweating. Are you by chance married and your wife keeps cranking the electric? blanket way up too high. Oh, do you do that? Yeah. She turns it all the way up and then she sleeps and sweats and then in her sleep, she throws it all over on top of me.

She throws the electric blanket that's now a full blast on top of me so that she can cool off. Oh, okay. So now I wake up. You have two layers of. Yeah, of electric blanket, even though my side's not turned on. I like to haul asleep that way. But, dude, it's... Yeah, electric blankets feel great.

when you first turn them on, and then when you wake up, soaked or sweat. I've never had one. I don't want one. You don't want one. Yeah. But I do have to be warm to fall asleep. I cannot sleep if it's cool. Good old poop helmet.

He's 47 and a dude. Nice. No, it's a 21-year-old chicken. I won't. Yeah, that's right. Just email me. I'll send you some information. Every once in a while, we'll get one of those questions that I just need.

It's better if we have a dialogue, and I'll email poop helmet back. So, all right, what do we want to do? I had something else that I wanted to do here. I mean, I have another question here if you'd like to answer it. Okay. It's just, Carla Finch is wondering if there's an update on PA John and PA Jill. Oh, whether they've, I don't know if John wants to answer that. What's the update?

Well, you said that you were waiting for marriage to have intercourse, that you were waiting until her cancer surgery had completely healed. healed up because the last time you had intercourse, her bowels fell out of her vagina. And she told the story on the show, so I'm not talking out of school. And it was, we got more email about that than anything else. Most of it, very good-natured saying, I hope Jill is okay. They want to know if his dick healed. Oh, okay.

Very good. Just came in. Absolutely. And it's feeling just fine. And you've masturbated. This is the podcast audience, so they're different from the season. Serious XM audience, you probably ought to give just a very reader's digest background on what the hell you're talking about. Give us the short version on your penis.

See, that makes it worse. That makes it so much worse. I know it does. That's why I do it. Okay. Fair enough. Do it, get it. Yep.

Okay. You do the Opie Hughes of humor cascade, which is do something. and then it's not funny and then do it again and then keep doing it until it becomes funny and then keep doing it until it's not funny and then keep doing it until it becomes funny again

and then you've completed the Opie comedy cascade I mean he's talked about that it's a great technique and you do it to you know very you've been a good student I just suck at it anyway I had a circumcision I had a

area where I had a where I had my circumcision that the skin folded over and connected and so there was a little tunnel there and every once in a while skin cells that would slough off would sloth. I like that word

slough. They would fall off but they wouldn't go anywhere. They just get connected all together underneath there and then it would kind of pooch out like a little white hard piece of skin zit kind of thing. Yeah like a toenail. Yeah eventually it ended up becoming that and that's what I said you were clipping toenails off your penis did you ever bite

him off like a fingernail he can't get down that far dude don't worry about it but I can bring it up so anyhow I ended up going because uh Steve talked about it having that and said it's an increased risk of a penis cancer and so I wanted to get that taken care of so I did I went and got it taken care of so they did a and this all came up because of this show right because someone called in with that problem and I felt like a genius because it it happened to me. I'd had this circumcision revision myself, and I felt, I was like, oh, I'm going to show those assholes.

I know the answer to this. And I said, John, do you know what it is? And he went, yeah, it's probably a bad circumcision. I was like, shit. I couldn't believe he knew that. Yeah. Well, I did, I thought you were smart, and then I realized you just had a screwed up dick like me.

Some pediatrician who didn't know what they were doing. Yeah. So, anyway, I had it a little tunnel cut up and had a couple stitches placed because of some bleeders. And, but since then, I've had the sutures removed. The scab has come off and new fresh skin is there. No tunnel. No toenails growing out of the penis.

Beautifully smooth and glistening. Grab it and yank on it as hard or as soft as I want. Nice. And it's working just fine. That is a heartwarming. Can we lower the lights in here, really? I really need some sexy music for these moments. It's like Barry White.

Yeah, I'll find something. It's the best penis I've ever had. And Carla, next time call in. There might be a phone call from 507. Yeah, there it is. 507 area code. You're on the air. Hey, Steve, this is Ryan in Minnesota.

Or on the internet. Oh, God, it's Ryan. Do you know Ryan? Yes, I do. Hey, Greg. What's up? I got a poop question. excellent um yeah a while back i decided to go on a diet and prior to my diet i weighed about

240 and my diet consisted of all red meat beef potatoes chicken wings lots of beer stuff like that and it was very rare where i had a solid shit now i have lost about 35 pounds and i am eating all salad, lettuce, stuff like that. And I shit little lobes of bread every time. I have high fiber, and usually people say that it makes you shit a lot. Yep. But I'm not kidding, a lot. It's just huge.

Are you doing high fiber, but low carbohydrates? Yep. That's the issue right there, and I've never understood this, but it's very common complaint of people on a low carbohydrate diet that one of the main side effects is constipation.

And you're exactly right. You would think if you're eating all these green leafy vegetables that you'd be shitting, you know, four times a day. But it turns out that the bowel, for some reason, works off of grains and carbohydrates. And that people who shit six times a day, like certain tribesmen in other continents, they eat a diet high in unprocessed grains, like they'll eat wheat, kernels whole and these guys will shit six times a day they never have colon cancer but uh you know it's there's something about the grain and the carbohydrates that stimulates the bowel to uh transit stuff through uh and honestly i'm just going to have to research this more because we've talked about on

this show that it is an effect i just don't have an answer for why because i can't figure it out either um is it sort of like the fiber needs more water content so you're not consuming enough water that it's not absorbing into the vows to evacuate? I do make a point to drink a ton of water. I drink. I must drink two a gallon a day. Yeah, okay. I drink a lot of water.

Yeah. Now, what you are eating in green leafy vegetables is a lot of what's called insoluble fiber, which is fiber that is not, you know, is not dissolvable in water. And so it doesn't attract water as much. That may, I'm just wondering if that's a germ of an idea. that may explain this. But very common, Adkins diet people or paleo diet people

get constipated like crazy. And when you were eating a lot of meat and stuff before, I guarantee you you were eating a lot more pasta and bread and stuff, and that's when you were shitting your guts out. So, you know what? I'll remind me, if I don't answer this question in the next few weeks, I'm going to do some research on this and try to figure out why this happens.

because it's been something that's been driving me crazy ever since I did low-carb lifestyle, which was 15 years ago, you know, so. Yeah, it's not to the point where it's like a real big deal, but, you know, I was practically a virgin the way I was before with my asses because it's just liquid coming out all the time. So now it's just a regular-sized shit for anybody else feels like I've given birth. Yeah, yeah.

No, I totally understand. And it is a known effect. I don't have an answer for why it is an effect. And the thing is that that is our diet that we were designed, to eat though we when we were living in caves or living in Tennessee and without any cities and without fast food around what did we eat you would eat lean animal protein you know you shoot a deer or something they're all starving too and so they didn't have a lot of fat on them and uh and green leafy vegetables and the only time you would have carbohydrates is when berries and and grasses were in season you were

eating the seeds off the grasses and stuff. So, you know, we really were designed to not eat a real high-carbohydrate diet and why that causes problems for us, I don't know. It's an interesting question, dude. All I can do is verify that you're absolutely right. That is what's happening to you, and I'll try to figure out why in the next few weeks. And don't let Ryan Bullshy. He's no anal virgin. You faggot.

Oh, Greg. All right. Well, let's, you know, why don't we check that thing and see if it, see, any time I start mumbling around like that, it means I'm playing with the equipment, trying to figure out how to make it work. Let me play a little bit more. And we have with us during this segment, Mark Riojas, who's a comic from San Antonio. Well, this was our first comedy third mic, or fourth mic, I guess. and never had another one after.

Hello, GV. Hello, everybody. And he's a consumer of health care or wishes that he could be. I don't believe in pain for health care. That's basically. Okay, yeah. Dude, and... Who is this?

Mark Riojas. He's a comic. John ran into him at some club. I was in San Antonio. Hey, we're doing a radio show. You want to be on it? And he's like, oh, yeah, I got to New York. the time. I said, well, why don't you come up?

He was a great stand-up at this comedy club. He was a great guest. He was the best guy there that night, and he was actually probably one of the funniest comedians I'd heard in a long time. He sounds so low energy. Well, yeah, he was just being cool. Yeah, he doesn't do radio. Oh, right. Yeah, I figured he was

great. I really enjoyed having him on there. And the fact, we've always tried to do something different, at least in the beginning. We did. We kind of given that up in the last few years. But we always try to do something different for every show that we did. So that one, we had this comedian come in and kind of try to interact with it and not sound like shitheads.

And we did okay with it. I mean, we're still not professional broadcasters. We've been doing this five years, but when you do one show a week, you're not going to become more professional. You've got to do four hours a day for 18 years. And then you might get somewhere in the area of an opium Anthony. But, you know, most broadcasters never get close to the quality of show they do. So for us to be doing a show once a week and to fool ourselves into thinking we're, you know, professional broadcasters. So we're not.

But we are, Todd is a master barber. GVAC is whatever he is. John is a physician's assistant and a specialist in orthopedics. and I do family practice and have been for 25 years and also do hospice and palliative care. So between us all, we have some expertise and we try to sound reasonably intelligent. Most of the time we fail at that.

But anyway, all right. Let me see if I've got anything else here. Hey, I tell you guys a story. When I was in college, I was on the wrestling team. Did we play this on this show? And sorry, sounds weird. We're in the shower after practice and look over one dude's plans himself to say, what the hell are you doing?

Yeah, we did. He says, I'm 100% straight, but I want to see if I can get a boner in a room full of guys. He's got there and jerked off. Next to you know about six or seven, another guy's jerking off. Okay, then I've got to start over because we're talking over this point out. It's pretty weird. That's about it. Anyway, well, that was a cluster.

What were you saying about us not being a professional? Look over one dude's plans himself and say, what the hell are you doing? He says, I'm 100% straight, but I want to see if I can get a boner in a room full of a like guys, he sat there and jerked off. Next to you know about six or seven, another guy's jerking off, and one of whom's crowned champion, like an 88% boner. It's pretty weird.

That's about it. So, uh, fuck, man, that's gross. So that was a circle jerk story. I'm not gay or anything is like the same thing as saying, no offense, but let me tell you. I'm 100% straight, but I measured this guy's boneer to 88%. You didn't say 90.

He said 88. I didn't realize it was just, He wasn't the only one that did it. Yeah, I didn't get the 88%. Yeah, the first time we listened to that, which was on the Sirius XM show. We thought just one dude got a boner, and that was it. I didn't realize that six or seven other guys did it, and then they were starting jerking off, and one guy ended up winning him.

There's a circle jerk. Yep. In the shower. I'm not gay or anything, but there was this glory hole. Right, and I gave it a little to just to try it. Right, exactly. It doesn't make you a bad person. You do whatever you want to do.

We're fine with him. Exactly. Just don't lie about it. Own it and be okay with it. I'm with you there, brother. All right, man. Thanks always go to PA John, GVAC, addidectomy, Todd, and Ashley.

We can't forget Eric Nagel, Opian Anthony, Ron and Fez, who's steadfast support of this show never goes unappreciated. Hope you'll join us for this journey on Riotcast Radio. Many thanks to our listeners whose voicemail and topic ideas

make this job very easy. Go to our website at weirdmedicine.com for schedules and podcasts and other crap. And thanks to Rob Sprantz and Bob Kelly for their support of the show, too. Until next time, check your stupid nuts for lumps, quit smoking, get off your asses and get some exercise. We'll see you in one week for the next edition of Weird Medicine. Peace. You are only coming through and wait

Your lips moved But I can't tell what you're saying When I was a child I caught a fleeting cliff Out of the corner of my eye I tried to look But it was gone I cannot put my finger on it now

The child is grown The dream is gone And I Had become Comfortably none Thank you.