Welcome to Night Vale - 197 - The Life of Frank Chen

Episode Date: November 1, 2021

He only ever had the one. Weather: “Blacksnake” by Charming Disaster https://charmingdisaster.bandcamp.com/ Transcript available at http://welcometonightvale.com/transcripts Patreon is how we exist! If you can, please help us keep making this show: http://patreon.com/welcometonightvale/ 2022 US TOUR WEATHER ARTISTS ANNOUNCED! March 27 - June 24, we’ll be all over America with “The Haunting of Night Vale” Tickets on sale now! http://welcometonightvale.com/live New novel from Jeffrey Cranor & Janina Matthewson: YoU FEEL IT JUST BELOW THE RIBS https://www.withinthewires.com/ Music: Disparition http://disparition.bandcamp.com Logo: Rob Wilson http://robwilsonwork.com Written by Joseph Fink & Jeffrey Cranor. Narrated by Cecil Baldwin. http://welcometonightvale.com Follow us on Twitter, Facebook, or Instagram. Check out our books, live shows, store, membership program, and official recap show. Produced by Night Vale Presents. http://nightvalepresents.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Howdy y'all. It is Jeffrey Craneer. I'm not sure which episode of Welcome to Nightville you're listening to, but I am speaking to you from April of 2026. And I'm here to tell you we're going to be in Europe. If you want to see Nightville live and you're going to be in Europe, come check us out at the end of May. We're going to be in Edinburgh on May the 27th. We will be in Manchester on the 28th, London on the 29th, and Amsterdam on May the 30th. Just go to Welcome to Nightville.com slash live to see the show dates and to get your tickets. This is. is our newest Nightville live show Murder Night in Blood Forest. It is so much fun. Please come check it out. Also, coming up this month here in April, it is the return of Alice Isn't Dead, brand new episodes of our other crazy hit podcast. This is written by Joseph Fink, produced and with music by Dysperition and starring Jacique and Nicole. So make sure you are still subscribed to Alice Isn't Dead and go get those on April the 13th as new episodes come out. Finally, speaking of other shows, do you want to hear us talk about other things? things. We have three other really great chat shows. First of all, there's Good Morning Nightvail

for all of your Nightvale needs. You can hear Hal, Meg, and Symphony talk about every single episode in order of Welcome to Nightvale. Also, we have Random Horror Number Nine. That is me and Nightville star Cecil Baldwin talking about horror movies one at a time in a random order. And then Joseph and Meg do best, worst, which is a really fun podcast where they look at hit TV shows and they review the best rated on IMDB, the worst rated on. on IMDB, and if you're a Patreon member, they will review the Middlest rated on IMDB. So check out all of those at Nightvillepresents.com or just wherever you get your podcast. And hey, thanks.

Did you know that over 50% of people who eat legumes end up dying someday? It's true. Welcome to Night Vale. Judgment Day has come, listeners. One year ago today, Judge Chaplin ruled that the sheriff's secret police and the city of Night Vale had one year to produce a living Frank Chen, exactly as he was on the day he was murdered. Failing that, the family of Frank Chen would receive free and unconditional ownership over the town of Night Vale. Well, a year has passed, and after several embarrassing failed attempts to fulfill the judge's order,

there is no sign or word from the sheriff's office. The family of Frank Chen is prepared to move into City Hall. Gathered outside are Norman and Don Chen, Frank's older brothers, and Nicole Chen, Frank's younger sister, as well as Mae Chen, Norman's adult daughter and Lyle Chen, Nicole's seven-year-old son. This small crowd of Chen's eyed the clock, waiting for the 3 p.m. deadline that would mean they officially owned the town. In answer to questions, they screamed, no comment, over and over. The only exception was Mae Chen, who took me aside and said that the family feels vindicated by the judge's decision, that they look forward to taking over this town and ridding it of injustice.

And making some big bucks, her father apparently unable to help himself shouted. Yeah, said May, if we're going to get a town, I guess it makes sense to figure out how to turn it into restitution for this family, you know? Well, from the last hours in which Nightvale is our Night Vale, I will continue to report. Frank Chen was born in Ottawa, but moved to Vancouver when he was four years old. Later he would tell people he didn't remember Ottawa, but this wasn't quite true. He had fragments of memories, an image of his father's hand as they walked together on his first day at preschool. A swirl of snowflakes, their ethereal likeness made heavy and terrifying by the ferocity of the wind. Dancing to the radio, delighted by his own

mobility. All of this he would round down later to, yeah, I don't really remember Ottawa. Vancouver was beautiful, but boring. He wasn't much of a nature person. He could see the beauty in the lakes and the woods, in the sheets of rain drifting in from the Pacific, but he would rather live somewhere ugly, where there were exciting people doing exciting things. In Vancouver, there was only lumber and then later television productions, the rainy city standing in for everything from Los Angeles to London. Frank had few friends in high school, but the ones he had were very close. They would film videos, little action movies and musicals.

Later, he would be glad that online video wasn't a thing then because what they made was terrible to watch, but a blast to make. Not all work needs an audience. He applied to ten schools, got into five of them, decided to go to NYU because his older brother was at Columbia, and it would be good to have a guide in this new city, in this new country, in this new stage of his life. His mother held him tight in the airport. He didn't even pretend that it was embarrassing or unwanted. He returned the embrace, and they stood like that until he had to let her go, pick up his carry-on with his left hand, and walk up the jetway. And now an update on Susan Wilman.

As you might remember, she learned the name of an obelisk, and this name has taken residence in her head. contained within the name is all of the knowledge in the universe, both past and future. Susan quit her job and all volunteer activities. I, for one, was so sad that she quit the PTA. We'll all miss how she never filled out her availability for meetings, and then would complain that the meeting, quote, just wasn't at a very convenient time, but no, don't reschedule it.

I'll make it work. It's just that it's not very convenient for many of us. It's a big loss there. Anyway, Susan has withdrawn completely from Nightvale Society and has taken to wandering the streets, whispering little phrases to plants and small animals. Her eyes carry a radiant darkness. You must be careful to not look into her eyes lest you never be able again to look away. She has changed in some fundamental aspect and no longer.

longer seems a mere human being, but instead like something natural and vast, a front of thunder clouds, or a toxic mold destroying acres of crops. What's next for Susan Willman? Who cares? Not me. Ugh. It is less than half an hour before the judgment of a year ago enters effect, and the family of Frank Chen take ownership of the town. Family members are now openly discussing their plans. Well, said Don Chen, we think there's potential for some real tourism money. People fly in, show them the sights, let them take a look at Radon Canyon and all that. Of course, added Norman, we'll need some more motels and public bathrooms and other

infrastructure for tourists, so some of this will need to be knocked down. He considered the town thoughtfully. Yeah, he continued, I think if we knock down everything from the sand wastes to City Hall, that should do it. When it was pointed out that this constituted almost the entirety of Night Vale, he nodded and said, Could be, could be, who can say? May Chen quickly added that they have the best interests of the community at heart, but also that the community covered up their family members' murder and then offered no risk. So maybe the best thing for this community was if it were just sliced up and sold to the highest bidder.

There's always land needed for another golf course, May said. The drier, the better, she continued. Golfers love knowing that their sport requires thousands of gallons of water to be shipped from a dwindling lake three states away, she concluded. I don't know how I feel about all of these plans, listeners. Um, bad, I think? Yeah, I think I feel pretty bad about them. NYU was simultaneously everything Frank had hoped and feared it would be. The city was so full of activity, crammed to the corners with people striving for their ticket to lifetime success.

Only those tickets were in short supply, and mostly held by the children of the rich. And so Frank turned to the opposite of ambition. He took up polka. Ludacrously out of fashion, hard to discuss with anyone out of the scene, it was the perfect antidote to the New York big dream. He received a music degree, had no real plans for what it could be used for, merely knew that he liked music.

After graduation, he moved back to Vancouver, but his hometown felt even smaller than it had before. and no one there knew anything about polka. He spent a summer helping his father clean out the garage. His father put an arm around him when they were done. I know that this is a time when we don't know what next, said his father. And unfortunately, we never know what next. None of us get that gift.

But I have confidence that whatever you do, it will be very interesting. His father patted his shoulder and went back into the house, leaving Frank staring at a perfectly clean garage floor. A month later, he moved back to New York, started his own polka band, the Big Apple Poca players. They mostly gigged at festivals, the occasional wedding or party.

He made almost no money. He was very happy. Two years passed. Then Frank's father, died. Frank didn't see it coming because his father was too young yet to die. It hadn't even been on Frank's radar as a possibility. After he returned to New York from the funeral, he told his band he was taking a break, but he knew that the break would be permanent. He packed up his tiny apartment, gave most of the possessions away, and left New York for good. He had no idea what next.

But then, none of us ever know what next. And now a word from our sponsors. Today's show is sponsored by Disney Brand Synergistic Family Entertainment. When it comes to your children, you want them to experience the most magical storytelling aimed at the family demographic sector. And that's where your old friends, Disney Brand Synergistic Family Entertainment, come in. We own everything. Every story?

It's all ours now. So if you want a story, you come to us. What? You want to be stuck telling your kids about your day on work conference calls? Boring them? Making them resent you? Failing as a parent? No.

You want a story about a princess that rides a talking horse. Well, we own that one. You want a story about a brave alien who overcomes the odds to save the the galaxy. That one's ours too. Some of your family memories belong to us now, so be careful what you remember. Disney brand synergistic family entertainment. The collective unconscious, privatized. The Nightvale City Council and the Sheriff's Secret Police have filed a final desperate measure, claiming that the court has no jurisdiction over the town because courts are, quote, like, a made-up concept that we all agree to pretend is real, while Night Vale is an

actual place where actual human beings actually live. A made-up concept can't be more important than real human beings. Unfortunately, Judge Chaplin threw out the motion pointing out that much of our modern society is built around treating made-up concepts as more important than very real human life. Then the city tried to get the judge to recuse herself due to the fact that her ruling in favor of the Chen family is a strong indication of her favoritism towards them. But this was also tossed out. There are no more judicial challenges to be met, and the deadline is only five minutes away. I'm afraid there's just no way around it. The Chin family is about to take ownership of the town of 19.

fail. For a long time, Frank Chen moved from place to place. Six months in Columbus, a tedious summer in Iowa City helping organize the university's music archive, three lost years in Ventura, playing Sunday nights at the Polish Community Hall in an inland strip mall near the freeway, the drone of cars, a constant accompaniment to songs like the Pennsylvania Polka, and in heaven there is no beer. It was after one of these gigs, as he packed his accordion away in the back of his 1998 Dodge Dakota, that he glanced up in the sky and saw something that did not belong there. It was a planet of awesome size, lit by no sun, an invisible titan, all thick black forests

and jagged mountains and deep turbulent oceans. was so far away, so desolate, and so impossibly, terrifyingly dark. And that day, Frank did not go home. He drove instead. He drove a long time, and eventually he ended up in Nightvale, and he stopped driving. Life in Night Vale was kind to him. He liked his neighbors. Just down the street was old woman Josie and her mysterious

friends, who were many-eyed and many winged and waved to him in the mornings. Right next to him was a trailer whose occupant he never saw, but who kept their yard tidy. He could hear their car starting early in the morning to go to some job, whatever job the person in the trailer had. Frank didn't have a job. He found he didn't need one yet. There was always cash in his wallet, always food in the fridge. This town wanted him there. and he was happy to oblige. One day he woke, knowing that it was time. Time for what?

He had no idea. But he had followed his feelings this far. He started his pickup truck, drove out toward the desert. Was he leaving behind this town right at the moment it had finally started to feel like home? He hoped not. But he pitched his foot forward on the gas. He leaned back into the leather seat. smelling their age and the faint sweetness of root beer, a scent that had lingered in his truck for years now.

He didn't know what next, and he didn't need to know. He could follow this feeling forever. A large shadow with a long tail and five serpentine heads fell across the hood. The family of Frank Chen has entered City Hall with just under two minutes left on the clock for the judgment to take effect. Norman Chen is getting the long, vacant mayor's desk organized. May Chen is asking several logistical questions like, so how does this government work?

And, okay, so there's a city council in here? And my God, what is this? What is it? What monstrous thing is this? And, oh, that is the city council. And, oh, that is the city council. Okay, cool. City Council itself is howling in terror and grief.

As control of the city, it has so long ruled, is slipping from its grasp. Truly, this is the start of a new era. And at the start of this new era, a man walks through the front door of City Hall. He moves quietly and uncertainly, feeling as though he is new to this world. He steps into the former mayor's office, and sees his brothers. Oh my God, says Frank Chen. And as soon as his brothers see him,

they understand that there is no question. This is Frank Chen, exactly as he had been on the day he was murdered. The judge's orders have been fulfilled with mere seconds left on the deadline. Yeah, shouts Sheriff Sam. Deus X Machina, baby! Rock that one out.

They held up a rare, Grimoir they had bought at a dusty used bookstore on Wormwood Avenue. Just a spell from this old book, and it worked. It actually worked. Ha ha! Yes! Frank Chen and his family stared at each other in quiet disbelief. All across this earth, now and in every moment, there is weather. head stay well enough away the power that protects me is a circle made of salt but when you come to get me I won't feel a thing at all the vultures that surround me ride the thermals up on high ever since you found me I'm afraid that I might die the scarabar ball my pillow whispers

vespers as I sleep you save me from the sparrows now my soul is yours to keep. Come morning we awaken to a garnet colored sky. The mirror cracked and broken making exes of my eyes. Can't turn away the darkness so instead I hold you tired. Ever since you found me, I'm afraid that I might die. Light the fire and sing the song. child just fall. But when you come to X's of my eyes.

There's a shimmer in the figures hallucinations as the sea The shadows closing in Is it just leap deprivation Or did you found me I die? Frank Chen found himself

enveloped by his family. Hands big and small clasped tightly to his back. It's you this time His younger sister Nicole said I know it. It's you. Yes, it's me.

said Frank, unsure what they meant by this time. There had only been this time. Frank Chen only had the one life. Lyle stood shy behind his mother's legs. He had only ever seen his uncle in photographs. Norman cried, silently, nodding as though answering a question. It was Don who first said the unthinkable that they were all thinking. Does this mean? he said,

Um, does this mean we don't get the town? Oh, I guess not, said Nicole. And Norman and Don frowned. But, but the investment plans, said Norman, it would make us a fortune. And they owe us a fortune, said Don, after all of this. Now Nicole frowned. We should get the town, she said. That's not fair, she said.

Frank had no idea what they were talking about. What do you mean, he said, getting the town. What is happening here? He had reunited with his family after years away dead, and the looks on their faces were of disappointment. He felt his heartbreak. Finally, it was May who stepped in. You should be ashamed of yourselves, she said.

Frank is home. Frank is home, and that's all that matters. And she was right. It was all that mattered. And the adults in the room were ashamed. Even Frank somehow. Although he didn't know why. Frank Chen moved back to Vancouver.

The city felt different to him. Better. He could see that there still wasn't much in the way of exciting people doing exciting things, but these days he would rather have the beauty of the lakes and the woods, the sheets of rain drifting in from the Pacific. He took long walks along the ocean, wearing one layer too little. He relished, feeling cold. The years passed, as years must.

He played polka. He taught music. He watched TV in the evenings and read a book in the mornings. It wasn't much, his life, but it didn't have to be. Because for almost a decade, he hadn't had a life at all. Now he cherished every boring, tedious moment of this one life that had been returned to him. When he was 73 years old, his niece may stop by as she often did when she visited the city. She had gray hair and the same laugh.

When she laughed, she sounded 17, and she always would. They ate soup and disagreed about the particulars of favorite family stories. and then watched the sun set until Frank dozed off in his chair. May sat looking at the uncle she hadn't had, and then she had had again. She felt boundless gratitude. And that is the life of Frank Chen. In the end, he only got the one,

and he used it the best he knew how. Stay tuned next for Well, I don't know what next. We never do. Good night, Night Vale. Good night. Welcome to Nightvale as a production of Nightvale Presents. It is written by Joseph Fink and Jeffrey Kramer and produced by Disparition.

The voice of Night Vale is Cecil Baldwin. Original music by Disparition. All of it can be found at dispirition.bancamp.com. This episode's weather was Black Snake by Charming Disaster. Find out more at charmingdisaster.bancamp.com. Comments, questions, email us at info at welcome to nightvale.com or follow us on Twitter at Nightvelle Radio. Or sing sweetly to your favorite star.

Check out Welcome to Nightvelle.com for info about all of our great weather artists, joining us for our 2022 live tour. Today's proverb, whistle while you work, hum while you hoard, sing while you sacrifice. Hi, I'm here to tell you about good morning Night Vale. Welcome to Night Vale's official recap show and unofficial best friend food podcast. Join me, Meg Bashwinner and fellow try hosts, Hal Lublin and Symphony Sanders, as we dissect all of the cool, squishy, and slimy bits of every episode of Welcome to Night Vale.

Come for the insightful and hilarious commentary and stay for all. all of the weird and wild behind-the-scenes stories. Good morning nightfail, with new episodes every other Thursday. Get it wherever you get your podcasts. Yes, even there.