Well There‘s Your Problem - Episode 191: The Great Seattle Fire

Episode Date: December 12, 2025

if your sidewalks are on fire, you may have done city planning wrong LIVE SHOW TICKETS: https://www.axs.com/series/30211/well-thereys-your-problem-at-union-transfer-tickets LISTEN TO PRAXISCAST: https://praxiscast.podbean.com/ LUTHERAN SETTLEMENT HOUSE TOY (AND OTHER ITEMS) DRIVE LINKS: food pantry: https://www.amazon.com/hz/wishlist/ls/W2KKR1MFH39T/ref=hz_ls_biz_ex for teens: https://www.amazon.com/hz/wishlist/ls/OPO3OYIL3CSV/ref=hz_ls_biz_ex for older adults: https://www.amazon.com/hz/wishlist/ls/33JZADUKQ4TSE/ref=hz_ls_biz_ex for parents: https://www.amazon.com/hz/wishlist/ls/2OLT3UIHUVYTL/ref=hz_ls_biz_ex Our Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/wtyppod/ Send us stuff! our address: Well There's Your Podcasting Company PO Box 26929 Philadelphia, PA 19134 DO NOT SEND US LETTER BOMBS thanks in advance in the commercial: Local Forecast - Elevator Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/

Yeah, no, it's like, it's like that time, Liam, you remember that time we went to, I forget what the entire circumstances were, but we were walking into a liquor store. We were at the liquor store and you were levitating. I was like, Liam, what's the opposite of coffee? How do I get that? Alcohol. That's bad. I was like, and I just flatly said heroin. Yeah, that's a better onset. If you think about it this way, what does coffee make you do? I thought I was very funny. It excites you and makes you shit yourself, right? Whereas if you want something like, yeah.

Yeah, exactly. Depresses you makes you unable to shit yourself. Cook it up an industrial grade slow fast. Oh, God. Instantly, immediately, I hope that they don't put age verification on watching this video as well, but just because we talked about coffee making us shit ourselves. What's a, what's a slow fast? Slow fast is, it's an old, it's an old Tumblr post, really,

but it's like somebody was like, I mixed like NyQuil and Day Quill. To Create Quill. And I was, and I don't remember exactly how they get to the punchline, but the punchline of the whole thing is it's slow fast, it feels incredibly bad, and it's just like the feeling of vibrating while you're also so tired that you can't think. Yes. So we already invented that. It was called a Speedball.

The thing that killed George the fifth? Also alcohol withdrawal. Ah. Yeah. Kids, don't do that. Just keep drinking. God damn it, Ross. Yeah, the DTs are not for me.

As someone who has drank so bad, he's got the shakes before. You don't want that smoke. You don't want that mess. My 20s were a bad time. Ross was there, allegedly. I am the fabled occasional drinker, the social drinker, and I'm just back from how having two gin and tonics. Yeah, yeah.

Two gin and tonics. Here's the thing, right? Because I'm on Manjaro, right? One of the things that does is it really compresses and destroys your ability to like consume food and alcohol. So I had a lovely time having my two gin and tonics at the pub with new people making friends. Felt like I was getting a good grade in social interaction. It felt very garrulous, all of this. Wow.

home was like, I'm starving, I'm gonna order myself a burger and be a real treatlerite. And I had like sort of two bites of the burger and I'm now currently in the vestibule of hell, the ante room of hell, the place where you go where you know that at some point in the course of your work recording, the two gins and tonics, which are a lot when you don't weigh anything and the sort of two bites of burger are gonna really all catch up with you at once. So if I start groaning, like I've just been punched in the solar plexus, that's why. Yeah, I'm going to, what we're going to do is I am, I am on, on that Zemi, and they're switching me to Manjaro or the other one whose name I can't recall right now, Zep bound.

Yeah. I think they're putting me on that jarro and, uh, and I, I have, I have made, like, as, as I drank on antidepressants, so I shall drink on GLP once. Watch out for that 7.5 milligrams. It's got hands. And they're like, don't do that. And I'm just like, I can't hear you. I like Javison too much.

No, no, listen, listen, let me explain to you something about drinking on Manjaro, right? The first time, because I am an occasional drinker, right? And so... The famous Secure drinker. Yeah, I had been on it for a few months, the first time I had a drink. Because I was reading Secure Boot, yes, go on. If they don't want you to drink on that drug, they shouldn't make it sound like a delicious tropical cocktail.

That's true. Oh, yeah, that's... Oh, yes. Let me finish the fucking story. So I was in London, we had done a live show, and in the course of an evening, we went to a Mexican restaurant. London has a couple of good Mexican restaurants, and I was like, okay, I've done all my work, fuck it, let's get lit, right?

Let's have margaritas, and let's keep having margaritas, and let's do some good old-fashioned British binge drinking, right? let's just have a night to not remember. And I got to three margaritas, which is not a high number, by sort of binge drinking standards. And then I got every single stage of drunkenness and hung over at the same time. It was like getting hit by a truck. I genuinely, I was having the fucking interstellar time compression where I was like, I'm still buzzed, I'm too drunk, I'm way too drunk, I'm sobering up, I am hung over, I'm really hung over, in the same instant. And once you experience that, you will not want to drink a lot on Majara.

All right, well, thank you. I'm gonna go ahead and put that in the castle of ignorance. And... God fucking damn it, okay. Go have a wonderful Manjaro with a slice of lime and softed rum. Ross, Ross. Dipping my Manjaro in the waters of the Caribbean, like Rihanna. The next time you're over, I have a rum cocktail book.

I will be putting your ass to work. Oh, you're making me make, oh, the cocktails from the type of liquor, I refuse to drink, yes. That's because you got too shitty on Captain Morgan when you were a freshman. That's not my friend. Oh, God, that brings back then.

It was worse than that. It was, what did you? Was it Admiral Nelson? No, what's the one that's like 150 proof? Oh, 151. Ray and nephew, overproof. Ray and nephew, Bacardi, 151. There's Gosling's 151.

I think it was Gosling, 151. Because it had the seal a lot. Why would Ryan Gosling do this to you? Yeah, no, it was, I got really fucked up. It was a miserable. Yeah, exactly. That was not good. My moment where I drank too much all at once, and I decided I couldn't drink that way

again when I was 17, it was, I would say, almost all of a bottle of absolute raspberry vodka. Wow. You start feeling the flavor and a flavored vodka pretty quickly. It sticks around. That feels... That feels... Food poisoning.

I've drank on food poisoning. Do not do that. Drinking an entire bottle of raspberry-flavored absolute feels like the most woman-coded thing you've ever done. I was simultaneously a young woman and a young gay boy at that moment in my life. And both of those are demographics, highly vulnerable to drinking too much flavored vodka and throwing up a color no one's seen before. Oh, yeah, vodka, the color of fear. When you dissolve the skittles in the butt, I got you. Yeah. This reminds me of the, this reminds me of the menthol vodka at the street fight show. Oh, don't remind me of the men's wild.

And then I don't remember what happened after. I think we just went, did we just go home or do we go to the bar? No, no, we hung out and talked to Allison and June afterwards. That was when I met June. That's right. Okay, November's, November's drinking stories, I got one more before we start the podcast that we get paid to do and we're here to record. Are we familiar with a drink called Advocate? Yes!

Yes, you are. Yes, we are. You're familiar with the devil's eggnog. Yes, yes, yes, of course. What if the kind of sense? What if the kind of satanic hollanders made an alcoholic custard? And what if you, at Christmas, decided to drink kind of too much of it and felt the kind of heaviness of that gastricly, very intensely?

It is a slime. It's an alcoholic slime. It like climbs up the sides of the bottle. Tramping in ways that have never been seen before. It tastes really good for the first little bit. I have learned so much about various fucked kinds of British liquors and, like, joining onto this show, it's crazy. I know what I'm doing next time I come to Scotland.

I'm going to have that, and then I'm going to go, what was that? Yeah, Buckfast. That would definitely be an interesting, like, uh, D&D, a villain or, uh, anime or whatever you call it is an alcoholic slime, you know? Yeah, it's getting the slime. This is how we're going to go out there. It's assumed in the gelatinous alcoholic slime. Yeah, that's got, that's how Ross and I are going out at the very least.

It's been good knowing your money. You know what we should do? We should do a sink point. We should count down. One more story. We should do. I'm going to death dog. We're going to run it out to town.

Are these all going in the show? No, we'll cut all of these out. They're 100% going in. I'm trying not to creak my chair. Tell us all the most embarrassing things you've done when you were drunk. Bombay Sapphire, you son of a bitch. Oh, Bombay sci-fi. I made Death Nog, which was...

I remember the Death Nog. Remember the Death Nog? Yeah. Although he didn't do its job right. If you survived, I failed. Yeah, no, the Death Nog did not kill me, no. No, it killed Joe. I think it killed a friend of the show, Aaron, last name redacted.

What the hell did you put in the Nog? What kind of a lot? What is this? It was a death. I put it in Wild Turkey 101 and like a splash of Everclear. Yeah, that was some, that was some, that was some nog right there. Yeah, you liked it, I think, for the first cup. And then I think, if I recall correctly, you refuse to drink any more of it on ethical grounds.

Yeah, I switch to beer, which is what I do. So I don't, you know, have liquor prop. Liquor doesn't treat me very well. That's why I drink beer. Burbent treats all right. Which can never harm you. Yeah, beer is the cause of and solution to all my problems. Yeah.

All right. Let's do a sync point. Sure. Okay. I'm going to do 321 mark. 3, 2, 1 mark. Okay. Hello and welcome to, well, there's your problem.

It's a podcast about engineering disasters with slides. I'm Justin Rosniak. I'm the person who's talking right now. My pronouns are he and him. Okay, go. I'm November Calian. I'm the person who's talking right now. My pronouns are she and her.

Yay, Liam. Yeah, Liam. As recently promoted assistant to the world's sleepiest boy, Justin Rosniak. Hi, I'm Liam McAnterson. My pronouns are he, him. And we have Jesus wept, man. Get a tissue. And we have a recurring guest host slash employee.

World champion. Yeah. World champion podcast appearances. Yeah. Suck that shit, Gareth. Hi, my name is Victoria Scott, my pronouns are she and her. Perfect, beautiful. All right.

What else has to be said? So I guess we can all go home, right? Toria. Yeah, I'm just going to tell more booze stories and I'm just going to yell over you whenever you try and stop me. I enjoyed this guy on the sort of bridge here, phasing through existence. Yeah, I think we have. I think we've formed a kind of hive mind here. Yeah, oh, this is just mirage block magic with the phasing, yeah.

That's what the new, that's what the new popular television show is about, right? Oh, yeah, absolutely. Liam and I are a pluribus now. Yeah. Oh, I got to watch that. I haven't seen it. God, fucking doubt. Do none of you keep up with your, like, responsibilities as content creators to stay abreast of American popular culture?

I had to watch 18 billion seasons of Breaking Bad and pretend it was good, just so people think I was cool long enough to pay, like to pay me to. I wasn't that good, I'll die on that hill. Look, I got a lot of things to work through. I'm not even finished with Columbo yet. My wife and I are watching that, actually. And he's on, what season is? Are you on season two of the Sopranos yet, Rods? Oh, no, I actually got through all of the Sopranos, but the last few seasons were a blur.

The fun thing about watching Colombo with your wife is that you get to do a see my wife knows a lot about Columbo bit every time even. Yeah. It's delightful for that. That, it's also delightful because Colombo is like the consummate car guy. And there's a whole, there's a, there's a, there's the like, we just started season two and like the best episode that I've seen so far, uh, a crucial part of like how he solves the mystery is he pays really close attention to this guy's Jaguar E type.

And I'm just like, oh my God, he's just like me for real. Like I would absolutely be like, oh, it's a beautiful machine you got there. And also he drives, he drives like a pujou 503 convertible that apparently Peter Falk found on the universal lot and was like, oh, that's cool. I'll make them pay to fix this up for the show. This will be his car. I didn't, I literally, I was shocked because I couldn't identify it. I was like, what the hell is he driving? Anyway, it's great. One more thing, actually. One more thing is the rest of the podcast. Yeah. So about this, about this photograph. Yeah, you could buy some, some latrine boots and shoes, which sounds disgusting. And I'm back.

Welcome back Thank you Like I said If I crash several more times I just need to get through my news item And then I That's all I care about frankly Okay sure

That's totally embarrassing This is beautiful Welcome to the Liam verse Yes Yeah this is this is part of my plan Actually I've targeted your apartment With bad internet So I can usurp you

And move up in the pronoun introduction order I prefer to go last I want to say yay Liam Hand of God If it were up to me I would just go last every time You know, we can't just do that. We don't have to do sort of complicated coups on the, okay.

We have to do coos. It's all the way down, Nova. Like a bunch of pigeons. Sorry. Sorry. That one really got me. That was really cute, yeah. I really got me.

I like that one. Anyway, this is a picture of the city of Seattle. of Seattle. And that can't be true. I don't see any like trans furry stickers in this. This was when they were still importing the trans furies. This is 1889. They had just invented trans people, furries would come out in 1905.

Remember when they assigned you a persona on Ellis Island? A bunch of cat girls off the boat from Japan. Anyway, the city shouldn't look like that. Or maybe it should. There are some people who disagree, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It was actually, this was a, this is an episode about the Great Seattle Fire of 1889.

This is immediately afterward, and it's, it's pretty bad. I gotta say, feeling pretty good about my decision to buy a latrine boots and shoes. Yeah. Or, I mean, the name is still disgusting, but the guy's still got like a hoarding up, which is, you know, shows get up and go on entrepreneurship. Yeah, this is where my shop used to be, I'm still gonna sell shit here. Yeah, exactly. to do, kick me out.

Yeah, exactly. Yeah, and actually you can kind of see, like, this is, for people who live in Seattle, this is, all the street names kind of stayed the same. So, like, you can actually kind of recognize, like, that's West Seattle on the other side of the water there. And you can kind of, like, recognize sort of where this is. I'm excited to be talking about this because... Between Yasler and Columbia.

Yeah, I'm excited to be talking about this because on my other podcast, No Gods, No, as I we did Hiram Gill mayor of Seattle and I mentioned in passing that I was very struck by a line on his Wikipedia page which just says after the great fire of Seattle reconfigured the city so I'm excited to learn about the reconfiguration yeah yeah no this is this was a major event Seattle this was like right at the precipice of Seattle becoming an actual city we'll get into it I don't want to I don't want to you know interrupt too long we have to do that something else for We have to do the goddamn news. Yeah, so... This has been a pretty crazy news item recently, yeah. We have another reason to feel bad about the Grenfell episode thumbnail besides the big vote-labor sticker on there, which is aged just terribly. Just very poorly, yeah, I got to leave it there as a story.

historical monument to our Hebrus. Well, that was the original plan with Grenfell as well. So yeah, Hong Kong appears to, maybe it's some kind of like former British colony kind of social contagion, I don't know, but Hong Kong has decided to outdo London by having a kind of mega Grenfell in Taipo in the new territories where you had a bunch of apartment blocks, which there's like nine of them built together and like four or five of them caught fire. And they have, like, the death toll is still climbing, because as with Grenfell, you have a bunch of people who are just in the buildings dead that they haven't recovered yet and

maybe just won't. But like, it's minimum... It was still burning for a couple days. Yeah, yeah, this is really bad. They also had like a firefighter killed as well, which is like, unusually even for these kind of like really terrible fires. What seems to have happened as of this point is these buildings were under some kind of renovation. I'm not sure exactly what, but there were some kind of facade repairs being done.

So they were covered in bamboo scaffolding, which in and of itself is okay, right? But they had some kind of low-quality nylon fish nets around. Yeah, yeah, that there's this sort of netting around the bamboo scaffold. scaffolding was just fishnet. Yeah, it should be fire resistant or sort of fire retardant. Whether or not it is, I mean, you can kind of see. It turned out not, but as well, they were also, when they were doing repairs around certain windows, you know, you want to board it up so you don't break the window. Well, rather than using boards, they used some kind of expanded polystyrene

foam, you know, just styrofoam, right? That's pretty flammable as it turns out. As we as we kind of talked about on the Granfell episode, that kind of like foam insulation can be extremely flammable. There's also a political angle to this, right? And so bamboo scaffolding is like, it's fine. It is not a well regulated industry. It's quite a corrupt one in Hong Kong, but it's also.

that only really persists in Hong Kong. But my understanding is one of the contributing factors here is that Hong Kong doesn't have a fire code. It has three fire codes because it's a special economic zone. So you can use the Chinese fire code. You can use the European fire code or you can use NFPA, the American fire code. So obviously like one country, three systems. Your inspectors are definitely over.

loaded. Yeah. Yeah, absolutely. But also there's, so like the supply of this bamboo scaffolding and the sort of like assembly and maintenance of it is the province of like a handful of specialists which leads to a kind of quite, it's like monopsity, I think you would call it, right? Like it's kind of cozy relationship. But that's political too in the sense that mainland China uses like all steel scaffolding, right?

And there is a kind of push on behalf of the sort of like Beijing allied politicians to modernize and to use like steel scaffolding. Conversely, if you are a sort of like Hong Kong independence or Hong Kong nationalist sort of supporter, then this is a sort of like a Hong Kong tradition that should be preserved. And so there's a lot of incentive on the one hand to put the blame on the scaffolding. Equally, there's a lot of incentive to be like putting the blame on the scaffolding is Chinese propaganda, right? So I think what we really needed was not just Grenfell in more buildings, but Grenfell and more buildings with a kind of really tense political sort of discord over it. Yeah, I mean, you know, that's definitely like, and just from, I don't know, from where

I'm standing, I'm kind of like, yeah, it's probably that, you know, polystyrene foam. they were using to board up the windows. That was probably the, you know, the big thing here that caused like apartments to catch fire and stuff, but I don't know yet. We'll, we'll see what happens, how this all, you know, works out. I don't know, maybe China finds an excuse to like eat Hong Kong over this. I don't know. That's already happened basically is the thing.

Like there are elections coming up, but they're gonna be like entirely controlled in that sense. Like anybody who is a big kind of democracy supporter is now in Britain, right? Or you know, in Chinese prison. So that's not really the kind of thing that's going to be downstream of this. What's going to be downstream of this is like it might fuck up the career of the current chief executive. What is interesting is that unlike Grenfell, we had arrests very quickly.

Yeah. And that is one kind of, I will frankly say, superiority of the Chinese political system is, okay, we're still not gonna do anything and like all of the kind of corruption might stick around, and the stuff will still happen, but you will get some scapegoats, whereas in Britain, everybody is too important to scapegoats, apparently. Yeah, all these things, you know, they just happen, there's nothing we can do about. Yeah, it's like there'll be a fucking inquiry, and like in 10 years time somebody who died five years ago might get a kind of like official frowny face.

Xbox. One Xbox. No games though. Yeah. Yeah. As opposed to 14 people who've been arrested. Right. You know.

Victoria and Nova, you do me a huge favorite. Can you turn? Can you kill your videos? Because I am, I am dying. Like I'm crashing every minute, minute 15. But I don't know that's a good. You look wonderful. I don't know if it's a video show.

I'm really sorry for interrupting you. Please go off. It's completely fine. I was coming to the end of my point anyway, which is, um, shit's bad, but I do feel like, when something like this happens and your name is on it, you probably should get arrested. And I don't say that, and they're like, you should get killed sort of way, but like, that's arguably, you know, something attendant to the seriousness of an investigation, you know? I'll buy that.

I do think if a positive thing comes out of this, it's maybe Hong Kong can slim down to one fire code as opposed to three. That would be progress, yes. Yeah. What a colonial legacy we, the United Kingdom, have left there. Yeah, yeah. It's like, ah, we can just cause confusion and delay here. Did you explain the three fire code things already, because I'm not familiar with that?

Yeah. All right. I was dropping out and dropping it. Different countries have different fire codes, and that's okay, as Maddie Ecclesias said. And Hong Kong is different countries in a very real sense. Yeah, because of just the legacy of colonialism, Hong Kong. Kong as, you know, they, they, you can use the European fire code. You can use the Chinese fire code, right? You can use the American fire code even. I'm not quite certain how that got in there,

but it did somehow. So if you are, you know, someone, like a fire chief over there, of course, you're going to be completely overwhelmed because you got to know three whole codes. Right. Yeah. I think it might not even be the Europe. European fire code, I think is the British one, which is stricter and requires ludicrous amounts of fire extinguishers everywhere. I mean, also, also the fact that this happened in the new territories, right? Like you're not looking at the, you know, the waterfront burning down, right? You're looking at like a sort of subsidized government housing.

Yes. There was like, especially like very elderly residents as well, which is one of the reasons why I think the death toll is going to be so high. Yeah. So, as ever, it is, it is, like, there are structural reasons why the people who, like, die in this sort of thing tend to be poorer and older. Yes. So, yeah, the four, five towers got set on fire from one little fire.

There's a video of the original fire catching, actually. Just a little thing goes up instantly. My God. It's crazy. Once you see anything like that, you do get one. Why, because like, sometimes fire brigades are kind of victims of their own success in fire prevention, where people aren't scared of fires, perhaps as much as they should be. And then you see like how quickly an entire building can take light, and it's like, oh yeah,

this is why this has been sort of like a key emergency service since Roman times, you know? Yes, all right, we'll talk about fire brigades in history later. Oh good. All right, jarring shift in tone. Tone? Yeah. In other news. Happy anniversary, Liam.

Happy anniversary to Liam and Corinne. Thank you. Thank you. All right, moving swiftly on. Is that it? Is that all you want? Do you just feel bad about the proximity there? Like 150 people plus died.

Happy anniversary, by the way. Yeah. Happy anniversary. I kind of wanted to go first. I felt like I wanted to be even worse, right? Because then it's like, happy anniversary, many happy returns, you know, infinite happy years together, unlike about 150 people. Well, if you, she'll never listen to this, but I adore you, sweetheart, so I'll, yeah,

all right, great. As my wife will vouch for never listening to your partner's podcast is by far the healthier decision. She does technically listen to it when forced to, I.E. when she has to work the live shows. It's unethical to do that. I was debating getting her earplugs as a yuck. Oh, Roz, I forgot to tell you,

I got you a present for the live shows. Oh. It's, do you wanna know what it is, or do you want me to? Is it a 12 foot paint roll? No, it's, it's an 8.2 foot pointer, extendable. Ooh, that'll be useful. So the point of the works.

But the pointers worked on the other live shows. I just-debatable. I just had to tape them. together. It's like a fishing rod. Yeah. All right. We should talk about the live shows.

Yeah, that was the goddamn news. Speaking of the live shows. The live shows. We're not allowed to threaten you as much because we don't get the video. Yeah. No, YouTube doesn't like when we actively do death threats against the audience. Okay. I would recommend we don't do that.

I am imploring you. Please come to the live shows. I'm beseeching you. Yeah, you will be the sexiest listener and... I think that probably might not now you're going to get us... You're gonna get us age restricted for another reason, yeah. Oh, heaven's, please come to the live shows. We are going to maintain, on both ends, an appropriate listener-creator-creator

relationship with you if you come to the live shows and also if you don't, but please come to the live shows. When are the live shows? I'm hearing you ask. December 14th and 15. Where are the live shows? I hear you ask. The live shows are at the Spaghetti Warehouse. You gotta start a union transfer.

It's not called Union Transfer. What are the live shows about? That's for us to know and for you to find out. That's right. Please come to the thing. Will I be able to buy merch at the live shows? Oh, like you wouldn't believe, motherfucker. Yeah, amazing.

We have so much merch. Which is another reason why it's important for you to come to the live shows. We will separate you from your money. From the podcast is made. So well. I will say, honestly it is. But we have high viz, we have signs, we have beanies, we have a limited run of holiday-themed

fruit decks. I'm so excited to get a care package of all of this stuff, which you remember to send me, yeah, like four to six months later. Yeah. Well, it'll be ready at time for next Christmas. Isn't Gwen coming to the United States? States. Gwen is currently in the United States.

So I'm sorry to say that you'll be missing my wife, otherwise I would send you my wife to help. Yeah, I was about to say we could send some shit back with her, but I guess not. It wouldn't even be the first time that she's stood in for me at a live show. She played me at the opening of a Kill James Bond show once. So this may be more plausible. Yeah, no, it was a good bit. Sadly, the live show, it will be Gwenless, but don't come.

Don't not come just on the basis of that. You know, you should come to the live show. We will go to a live show. We will do one in Europe. We will fucking do one in Europe, okay? Stop yelling at us. Yeah, or Maine or someone told us to come to Mexico, which, brother, you tell me what town and we'll be there.

I would love to go to Mexico. Oh, yeah. Cotsuquakos. Yeah, we're going to live and see you down Morris. It's, well, there's your problem. We are going to get assassinated by the Mexican Navy for your... listening pleasure. No, we did squash the beef. Personally shot in the back of the head by Claudia Scheinbaum, yeah. It's no more than we deserve. Yeah, that's that, that actually

does track. Right. Links in the description. The links in the description. I'm also reiterating my plea. You know, if you ever want November to come to America to do a show, she needs an 2001 visa, which is difficult to get. But one of the big parts of that is we need press. If you are a journalist, please write some articles about us. Nice ones, please. Exactly. We'll take bad ones too.

Do you work for, I don't know. A credit of media agency. Yeah. Yeah. Do you work for, I can't even think about it. Rojasia. Do you work for the national? Do you work for Russia today?

Commerzant, do you work for press TV, France 24? Does the epoch? Deutsche Velt? Yeah, if you write for any of these, write about us, profile us, please. It helps. We want to be featured in the Arlington Catholic Herald. You can probably just ask your mom, and you would be featured in the Arlington Catholic Herald. She's a Protestant. Oh, that's right.

Yeah, we're gonna be in the Arlington Protestant Herald. Oh, no, we don't want that. No, nope, take that one back. No, it would have to be the, it would have to be the, it would have to be the, uh, the newsletter for, um, oh, crap, what's the one at Lexington Presbyterian. Right. Oh, that's not so bad. Uh, yeah.

Lexington Presbyterian, Harold? I don't know if they have their own, they got a newsletter. They must have a newsletter. Yeah, for some reason the newsletter is called sexy, sexy Lexi prods. Yeah, but put us, put us, put us in your newspaper, put us in your newsletter, put us in your blog, Put us in your substack about how your girlfriend cheated on you with RFK Junior. Whatever it is. You beat me to it, damn.

Put us in, we want to be featured in the Rockbridge County News Gazette. Oh, hell yeah. Just us, we could do like a Ken Burns montage of pictures of us over Jump Mountain Blues. I mean, here's the thing, right? If you wanted us to be profiled in the press, and if you wanted me to be profiled in the press specifically, all I have to do is do something, really transsexual, like, try to use the women's changing room at the hospital where I work. And the British press will write thousands of words about me. What if you gave a bad essay a zero?

Ooh. Yeah, I might do that. I might do that. Yeah. Infinite War, Just War, on the University of Oklahoma. If I go into that, I'll definitely get us age-restricted again. Yeah, I'm gonna get real clever now. Just a war are the University of Oklahoma.

Just a peaceful transfer of power. At the University of Oklahoma. Yeah, exactly. We hope they have a nice time. Yeah, we do. No threats of violence here. Can you say those words in that order? I don't know.

I don't know. I think we're fine. And if we're not fine, then we live and learn. Then I continue my winning streak. Well, we don't learn because YouTube doesn't tell you why you are restricted. They should really do that. YouTube is a vast and infinite monster that I do not understand. Maybe we need to get on like-

Hey, do you guys want to read the comments? I'm like, no, Spotify, I don't. They're like, hey, do you want to read the comments? Oh, hey, do you want to read the comments? Oh, hey, no, Spotify, I don't. Maybe, maybe we should get on, like, Daily Motion. We should get on flubb.

It's all on flubb. It's literally on flue. It's literally on flue. It's literally on-lood. Posting every episode in like a series of 275 consecutive minute and a half long TikTok. Okay, so here's the thing, Victoria. You don't have access to, well, there's your problem inbox, but I sure do. No, I don't want that. The madness fire hose. Have you who seen

the emails that are like, we could make your content into YouTube shorts and or TikToks because you're not getting enough? I don't check those. Like, I specifically don't remember the Patreon login, so I don't read the comments to make myself feel bad. When I want to make myself feel bad, three in the morning. I'm on the YouTube comments sorting newest first, looking for the motherfucker who's like, who's this guy? And I'm like, then I switch accounts and I go, that motherfucker right now. You have to believe that bit. I don't do that, don't do that, you know. Just cut all of that out, mostly.

Just bleep, bleep, bleep, I don't want to do the motherfucker while we're here. But I do, I also sort newest, and I'm just like, oh, my enemies list grows longer, by the day. I see. I did short form video for an automotive publication for about three months, went directly to a psych ward, resumed to doing it for six months, and then quit my career. Yeah. Yeah, that sounds about right. And well, there's your problem make work program. Yeah, I remember texting you in the psych ward, quite concerned. And what I should have done really has been like, do you want to come on my fuck-ass podcast? Your listeners are much nicer to me than the subscribers to a large automotive outlets

Instagram videos. In fairness, being on Instagram is a sign of a decayed soul. Being a car enthusiast on Instagram is like two strikes already. It's like for like the death penalty. Oh boy. Look at this AI concept Maybach that should result in us declaring World War III against Germany. Yeah. You know, one of these times we We got a strike first.

Yeah. It's crazy that Mercedes just made the Hitler car and just announced it with like the red banners and just go like latest Mercedes concept, you'll find it, you know what I mean. Anyway, live shows. Live shows. Come to the live shows. Okay. Well, those were the announcements.

Announcements. I don't participate in this. I boycott this like the Soviets at the Olympics. All right. Two hours in, we're ready to talk about it. What the fuck is a Seattle? Yeah, that's right. About an hour and 30 minutes of death threats cut out already.

We're really chewing through these, man. Yeah, so to explain what the Seattle fire is, we have to explain what Seattle is. This is a topographical map of what is now known as the city of Seattle. This is a heat map of pollicules. Actually, it does map fairly closely. Good Lord. Transgender density. It's a good thing y'all have the high ground, you know, the evaders come, yes.

Yeah, the civil conflict who come. Yes, it's a glacially carved fjord. It's like one of the only parts of America where we have, like, honest to God, fjords. And so it was under about 3,000 feet of ice 15 to 20,000 years ago. You know, there's been humans here for like 4,000 years. In the 1850s, when, like, white people started showing up. There were at least 17 Duwamish settlements alone, just like around the people's town. So it's been like inhabited for ages. The original parties to come settle it

show up in 1851 and they settle in what is now called Elki Point in West Seattle, which is, you know. Oh, right? You can see it on the map right on the bottom left. Yeah. It's the big sort of protuberance out. Yeah. Yeah. So they set up there and they stay there for winter, and then they realize that, you know, the winter weather just sucks out there. The tides are really intense. Exposed point in a fjord. Terrible idea. Yeah.

And they're like, this is not going to work. This is a terrible idea. So they, Arthur Denny, who was the original settler, there's like a Denny way in Seattle and a bunch of buildings named for it. It was like one of the six rich people who came out. Oh, the guy who invented the Grand Slam. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, the concept of getting breakfast drunk off your ass at 3 a.m. That comes from him.

Wow. What a city. Wow. All right, this is the problem. You needed Norwegians for this type of terrain, and they had, I have no idea what kind of white ethnics these were. I don't know. We do actually have an enormous, like, Scandinavian population here, including within my own

polycule. Pining for the fjords. I do pine for the forest. I realize, not to make me sound like I'm better than you, but I realize I've never really thought about the, like, individually ethnic, like, composition of my polycule. I haven't really, like, I haven't, I'm not making everybody, like, you know, do the sort of calipers before I start dating them. I mean, it's, well done. No, no slabs in my pollicule.

Oh, geez, come on, man. It only comes up because my girlfriend really wants a sob, you know? Yeah. According to my, according to my heritage, I have the sub hapla groups. It's made. Made in the goal of my shoulders. But just for the kind of car you want. Like, that's actually how auto reviews work, because they're like, well, actually.

Sponsored by Mercedes. Oh, God. I gotta watch out for the German pollicules. You gotta watch out for the Germans. You can stop that sentence right there. Yeah, that's true. World War III, book it, folks. I don't know, German polycules.

I'm married to Berlin. Very orderly. On the other hand, do not ask the German polycule what they think about Palestine. Don't ask them about what they think about the Polish polycule either. Don't talk to me about the Polish poliq. You want to elaborate on that further? No, no one does, actually. Hey, remember those two weeks when I was learning Polish?

No, me either. Oh, dear. Well, they're still working on changing that light bulb. Don't belittle your own people. But little other people. That's the important bit of humanity. We're on a level playing field of suck in our polycules. I don't know, I'm monogamous.

I got nothing for this bit. I just got nothing. I'm just like, yeah, my wife's cute. You're in a monocule. I wish I had a monocle. I would look tight in a monocle. That rule. Oh, yeah.

That's good. That can be your next gift for the next one. So you gotta go to the German polycule for that. I'm not going to any Germans. I don't like Germans. I don't trust Germans. I have made this very clear, abundantly clear. I know we have German listeners and fans. To that, I say, uh, the nuke is coming. Doing, doing the live show in Germany, but it's just we have a big banner behind us that says, Morgantau plan now.

Well, there's your problem, March on Berlin. I mean, genuinely, I would love to do this, and I would love to get a German guest for this. So, you know, shout out in the fucking email or whatever. I would love to do a bonus episode where the problem is Germany. Yeah. Yeah, that would be a good one. I also look forward to the oft-awaited bonus episode, Our Dads, which is our dad's roasting us.

But I think Ross Dad would be too mean. I think my dad would just be incoherent. He'd be like, ah, my son is great. Now let me talk to you about Mao. Get my chance. And then he would tell my mom that Mao had to break a few eggs. She'd call him a mass murder, and they'd just get into an argument again. I genuinely don't know what my dad thinks.

about Mel. Ask him. Okay, sure. Let me know. You were saying before I derailed and ruined everything. Oh, yeah. I think I was talking about my... Seattle. Denny's. Nordstrom. I don't know. What else is there? The Crackin? Yeah. We have a... Hey, we've got a women's hockey team now. They just set the all-time... They're so good.

They just set an all-time attendance record for women's hockey in America at their first game. Wow. Because this city is like 35% less... and it's incredible. I need to go to there. Bring back the Sonics. Yeah. I need, I need to go to Philadelphia and I need to go to Seattle.

These are my priorities. I have a, my future sister-in-law, it's from Whitby Island, Washington. So Claire, if you're listening, go crack and hello. I really, I do really need to go to Philly. That is actually true. We'd love to have you. We have a guest room. Sweet.

Yeah, we'll do that. We'll record the next one live from your guest room. anyway yeah Seattle is like full of fjords and lesbians you know so the why is this why is this important to know so they okay yeah all right I remember you now Arthur Denny after inventing the Grand Slam and drunken breakfast at 3 a.m. sets up all they set up their new encampment in the mid what is now the middle of Seattle in what is called Pioneer Square like right there where all the ferries come out of sort of the foot of those hills now you'll notice that all of the land to like due south of that is very low on this top o map it looks it's like almost

directly at sea level oh that is because that is uh the mouth of the duwamish uh duumish river um which was just like low lying you know um like tidal mudflat basically so that would all flood or you know get filled with uh the incoming tide or whatever um and it was pretty uncontrolled like it was very like basically where the green ends in the current topographical map was like the actual you know sort of edge of where it was no longer just tidal mud flat that was actually land um but because you know the city of Seattle is uh it was glacially carved all of the dirt in the area is what's known as unsorted glacial till which is basically just frozen mud that was left behind when the glaciers were treated so it makes it really easy to kind of shift all of the land masses

around and play like city's skylines on like free roam mode with the topography. So that was like the first 70 years of the city, which is messing around with that. What that means is- Like city skylines topography stuff by hand, a bunch of guys with shovels. Yeah, well, let's see that they got a little bit more advances than later. But yeah, pretty much they were just like, yeah, we can just kind of like, this mud looks good. We can just add a little more mud if we need to. It's no big deal.

You know where this goes on the, you know, where this goes on the, silt, sand, and clay chart. No, I don't know, I'm not, I am not a loam expert. You don't know about, yeah, no, I never understood that chart either. As we've been clear on this podcast, we've spoken about before, we don't understand soil science, right? No, it was that, that was, I, I took that class two times and I got through it the second time with a D.

Um, you just, you just submit a paper at the end that just says, dirt. Dirt. And dirt is misspelled. D-U-R-T. Listen, the Bible says God created play and loam. There's no such thing as sand. God created the firmament. Right?

D-U-R-T. Getting 0-25 for this. A Q, a second Q, a third Q, a fourth Q at the Batman symbol. And somehow Ross got an A-minus in that class. No, that was third. Thermodynamics that I got to get myself the gigantic sack of Hershey's Lauren brought me back from America. Thermodynamics is the class I got an inexplicably high grade in.

I mean, you are a smart guy. I'm not shocked by that. No, there's like, you know, thermodynamics, you just need to know three things. You can't win, you can't break even, and you can't get out of the game. The only way to win is to not play. I don't... Yeah, all right, moving on. Yeah, that's how you win at ThermoDermin.

Dynamics, never get, never be born. I tell you what a life. It's like an escape room for your, for your soul. Anyway, yeah, that area you circled down there where it's got like Harbor Island and all of Soto and both of our stadiums and stuff that didn't exist. That was just like the mouth of the river. Ah, all right, Hershey's acquired. I'm going to rustle this into the microphone and really enjoy it.

Ooh. So, so yeah, so this is, you know, Seattle. So basically, you know, white people get here and they're like, All right, next slide, please. That was fucked up of them to say, but sure. Holy shit, there are so many trees. We should start cutting these down immediately. We can make so much money.

It's free real estate. It's free planks. It's free, like, timber. We're inadvertently going to name Skid Row that for skid logs down it. Yep, this is the original mill that was shipped. So they sent a steam mill here via boat from, New York to build on the waterfront here. And this is the original mill of Henry Yessler.

This is the end of Skid Road. This later becomes Yessler Avenue, which if you've ever played Grand Tremesmo 4 and raced the Seattle circuit, you know that road. Because it's the one where you like start cutting uphill right before you get to the cool jumps. Oh, shit. Yeah. That's that's Yessler. We've also got like a really cool skyscraper there and, you know, whatever.

It's, that's Seattle Geography, so you can place this if you've ever been here. So anyway, because the city is like an entirely old growth forest that was, you know, well taken care of by the native people for, you know, thousands of years. Just dusting our hands and saying goodbye to all of that, does it turn into planks? It turns into planks immediately. It looks like some spruce pine fur to me. Yeah, with this one weird trick, an entire old growth forest forest can become a bunch of matchsticks.

You know they used to cut down redwood trees for matchsticks specifically? I do, yeah. Yeah, that's great. Yeah, they used to, used to, you know, I saw it on Looney Tunes, they put the whole thing on a lathe and carved it down to one match sticks. All right, so I'm going through these, these chocolates here, I just have one quick question to Americans in general, really. What the fuck is a Mr. Goodbar?

Why does I have a title? You ever heard of Dr. Pepper? I mean, I guess, but why do you need your foodstuffs to think that they're better than me? Is there a Mrs. Goodbar? Yeah, Mr. Peanut. I, I, I, when Woke 2 shows up. Mr. Goodbar is going out with the sexy green M&M. Dr. Pib.

When Woke 2 shows up, they're going to have to rename this to Mix Good Bar. It's a non-binary good bar. Oh yes, the MB bar. A nuttier bar for nuttier time. Hmm. Ooh. I'm assuming kind of a Liam role of, like, derailing the podcast, because that's what happens when you get a couple of drinks in me.

So, well, I'm- I- I- I'm saluting. You can't see it, because I had to turn my camera off for, for Dan with her, but I am saluting. The, uh, the, the Mr. Goodbar will have to, uh, either change as, I don't know, should we, should we force Mr. Goodbar to change his pronouns? I don't think so. I think so. Half the reason I like-Fem, Mr. Goodbar, yeah, force have Mr. Goodbar! Half the reason I like Hershey's is that they've already got pronouns.

I don't know, this is, this is an ethical question, I think that we'll have to ask. I think it's ethical to force that Mr. Goodbar. That's your asking me. That's my line of the sand. Americans, you fucking love discrimination so much that you've jerrymanded my bag of Hershey's miniatures here. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah, no, we're the, we're the country with the problem with titles.

Yeah, this is, this is supposed to be, this is supposed to be, like, regular Hershey's, whatever the fuck a crackle is, Hershey's special dark chocolate and Mr. Goodbars. And I would say this thing is like solidly 95% Mr. Goodbar. No, but that is not a murderer's row of Hershey chocolates. I will, I will send a care package. I am from Central Pennsylvania. I will get you the good shit. Okay, yeah, you go directly to Hershey Park to get, like, the good chocolate.

Yeah, you go to Hershey World, dude. Yeah. Have you ever been to Hershey World? Let me into your country. Do you love the idea of going to the supermarket and getting, like, the sea lister's bag of Hershey's? That's what it feels like. Well, listen, there were like two crackles, whatever the fuck that is, in here. And then, and then it's like 95% Mr. Goodbar.

And then, like, here's what's left at the bottom of the bowl after Halloween when all the kids pick through to get the good shit out. No, but when you, if and when you come to the United States, I will take you to chocolate world. Oh yeah, we should all go to Hershey Park. Oh my gosh, that'd be so fun. Yeah, we can put that on the corporate card. Yeah. Right, yes. All right, cutting down all the trees in Seattle. Yeah, yeah, yeah. For one toothpick. Yeah. Basically, the, the, the, immediately Seattle's entire purpose is a city is, it's a frontier town that cuts down trees to ship lumber to California. Although it does, there are ships that send lumber as far afield as Alaska and Hawaii and even Australia.

Doing the Monty Python Lumberjack song joke for this because, you know, Seattle as it became. What? Never mind. Oh, God, is it that? Oh, no, I've blocked that from memory. I'm sorry. It took me a minute to realize what you're talking about. That's a British thing.

That's, we don't, I don't fuck. Yeah, what if our beloved comedy was like transphobic, you know? Every single time somebody's like, oh, I remember this beloved British media property. You should check it out. And I watch it. It takes me 45 seconds to hit the most offensive transphobic joke I've ever seen in my life. It's like the only American who ever got close is Matt Groening. And it still took him like three seasons to get to a point where he was comfortable working them in in the writer's room.

That's right. Whereas like every single British thing, it's like, hey, what are you doing today? I'm out of ideas. What about what if women were actually guys? Yeah. Yeah. I'm, I'm from, I'm from hell. I'm from Waterloo where the vampires hang out.

When I came to visit you this summer, and we land in, my wife and I land in Glasgow, and we have to, sitting on the plane for a while, I got to go to the bathroom. The first thing that struck me about the country, even before I noticed how bad the airport was, was that every single restroom is signed with females.

And I was like, so much just made sense. Hold on, hold on. We got to compare notes here. The Glasgow airport versus the Edinburgh airport, which is where I came in. Um, and Burr, it looked like the top gear technology center. It was just like a, like a shed. They kind of both are.

The Glasgow airport just kind of felt like it was a, like it reminded me a lot of like, um, like the shitty unremodeled parts of O'Hare where it's like, it's like, wow, this was a nice airport in like 1963, except they didn't build more or make any part of it nicer. The whole thing just looked like. 1963. All right. Well, we're bringing the social attitudes back too.

Yeah, Edinburgh was like, no, this is just a shed. I was like, the thing that really struck me is like, the customs area was like, gee, I could just probably walk around this, you know? Yeah. Oh, yeah. Well, like, we kind of stopped bothering to enforce custom stuff once we were in the EU, and now we've left, we can't afford to start. So we're just in limbo.

I will be right back. Keep gone. All right. The thing that strikes me here, sending lumber to Alaska, you know, that feels a bit like sending, you know, coals to Newcastle, you know? Yeah, but you don't have the, you don't have the mill, and then they'd have to send them the mill. Yeah.

Yeah, everyone's trying to mine gold up there when there's all these trees around, you know? Well, they weren't doing that yet. It was, that comes later. That's another big part of Seattle's history, which we do, you know, you're brewing in the episode. I got to get to that. Oh, shit. Okay.

Anyway, so they make a lot of logs. That's like the history. street of Seattle is they get white people get here they're like damn look all these trees let's cut them all down and they start doing that and Seattle becomes a timber city so next slide please I like these woodcuts these are very pleasing even though these came out of like an old growth tree yes yeah this is actually from Harper's magazine in 1870 and this is what Seattle looked like in September of that year now you'll notice that these houses are kind of like they go up the hill a lot and then there's even more trees behind it and it's even

steeper. If you've ever walked around the city of Seattle, it's very, very hilly. And you can kind of, you know, if you look at that topography map, I had a few slides that you can tell, like it's because it was, you know, glacially carved, just sort of like a big mess of hills. Is this why you kept saying Glasgow reminded you of Seattle? Is that it's a really cold, wet, and full of polycules? Yes. Yeah. No, that is actually entirely it. Also, yeah, I don't everybody was like, it was kind of nice. I really loved Glasgow except the airport. It's a good city with a weird airport, yes. Yeah, but I mean, like, I, no, like me, me saying I, me ever comparing anything to Seattle is very high praise.

I do, I do love it here. But yeah, Glasgow did kind of remind me a little bit of it. And a lot of it is because, yeah, it's incredibly steep everywhere all the time. I like the weird mall. Oh, this is an Enoch's sensor. Yes. Yes. Yes. What if we built a gigantic? We didn't, no. What if we just built a, gigantic glass pyramid that you have to drive through to get into it's a it's a good mall and they're demolishing it any second now oh god can't have it well in Seattle because you know because they're just sending out timber you know you want to be as close to the water as

possible as you can just float the logs um so they just started building the city directly into kind of like tidal flats right um and so you know they you can kind of see like here there's got like like stuff on piles right up, right basically built on the water. I empire of mud, just kind of doing like mud Venice. Yeah, yeah. And so, you know, and the tides were really big. So, because the Puget Sound is part of the ocean. So like, it would flood all the streets, you know,

that were kind of like at this original part of the city, like at water level built into the mud flats. And, you know, in this era of extremely early plumbing, they basically just ran outhouses down. hill via wood pipes into the, into Elliott Bay. And then, you know, they would just dump the shit and piss into the water. And then the tide would come in and flood the muddy streets with shit and piss. Yeah, white people have showed up to bring new civilization in the form of cutting down your entire forest and filling the sound with piss. Yeah.

And shit. Of course. Log rolling. Yeah. I mean, it's not, it's not really relevant to the episode. but I did, I was curious, and so when I was doing the research for this episode, it took like one year of being chartered as a city for white people to be like, okay, we're going to kick out all of the native people who live in the city limits. Yeah, that tracked. Yeah, that sounds about right.

Yeah, they ended up having to recharter the city again for some weird reason, and they tried again late. It's pretty bad. It's pretty bad because it was like the first thing they did. The streets are still full of shit and piss, which seems like it should have been a more urgent concern. I think it was still like during the Civil War. And they're like, no, we got to, let's get so fucking racist with it. Yeah, you're sort of first concern, the thing that's more sort of repulsive to you than the shit and piss is. And this is the other thing that's so ironic about Seattle is its name is taken from one of the chiefs of the area that was like friendly with like white settlers. And they were taken, I believe this was, it was like basically concurrent.

The city took the name of the chief and then also was like, we're also going to kick out everybody who lives here already. It's a very American. is white yep yeah yeah is um it is bleak and then of course you know anyway next slide please this is this is uh what is basically now first avenue um in 1878 so this is eight years after the harper's wood cut and as you can tell like they've begun to you know regrade the city a bit uh the buildings are all kind of lifted on stilts um the road surfaces and the sidewalks are all elevated to get them out of the mud flats, there's, you know, like, and they do this for a lot of, like, low-lying stuff down by where the mill is, um, to keep kind of the same topography in terms of, like,

the ground is still below and muddy, but the people are no longer walking through shit and piss to get to their, you know, shoe store or whatever. Yeah, and just stand on this kind of precarious pile that's like balanced in the mud. Yeah, and the other thing, too, that's worth noting is because trees are everywhere and the city is founded around a mill, timber is free. So the road surface, the sidewalks, the road supports, all of the buildings, all the framing, everything in this picture is made out of wood. There's like three.

What's the title of this episode again? The Great Seattle, nothing happened of 1889. Yeah. Yes. The Great Seattle Polycule of 1889. Oh, God. There's like three brick mills. buildings in the whole city.

There's not, it's so, you know, we basically, it's, it's, it's, you got to get the bricks up there for one thing and why would you do that when a wood building is so much wood fine and also insanely cheaper. Yeah, yeah, yeah, and doesn't need to be transporting. There's no masons in the city, everybody's like a woodworker, carpenter, because it's like, you know, that's why you'd come there. Because again, you know, next slide, please. So this is Seattle, June 5th, 1889, uh, a picture of, uh, uh, a picture of, uh, uh,

a block that is going to become important in one day. I like, yeah. You know, so the city, the city is getting more, yeah, it's pretty shot. So many damn telegraph wires everywhere. This was the posting of its day, you know. We should have, your internet should come to you through like a wire arrangement this obvious and striking, you know? Yes. We still have, so we still have trolley buses here.

And so there are some intersections where you get to see all the wires up above. Yeah, but you don't have to fill me with that kind of like childlike wonder. Yeah, I like for this though. It contains the sense of busyness, you know? A telegraph pole with like 45 horizontal dewhickies and a million wires on it. Yeah, so you know, the city is developing into something a little bit more like a city. You know, if I think at this point 1889 it's got like 30,000 people living there, they're estimating.

But you know, it's still like forf by like SF, you know, it's not quite a frontier town anymore, but it's also not really a huge, like a real city. And, you know, this, because it had kind of developed so slowly and so sort of like built on top of each other, you know, they're lacking a lot of stuff you would hope a city in the late 1880s would, you know, have at this point. Notably, like a centralized water system. There's a bunch of- The mudflats of the bucket and grab yourself some good old American mud. Well, that's kind of what they, I mean, that's saltwater, but there was like, other like tributaries they were kind of pulling from and there's like some springs nearby and so they've

got like six different sources for water and some like water towers like up way uphill um and they're all of these water sources I run through hand-hewn hollow logs for pipes yes I found sources that said that there were thousands of feet of these wooden plumbing wooden plumbing um no this is this is a bragging thing, hold on, I gotta figure out when the last wooden pipe was taken out of service here. While you do that, I've just completed- Spoiler alert, but I think it was probably shortly after June 5th, 1889. While you're working that one out, I've completed my Hershey's Miniatures audit, and let

me tell you, the results are atrocious. Regular, regular Hershey's, we got eight, dark Hershey's, we got 18, Mr. Goodbar, we got 24, and then a single crackle. You got absolutely hosed. I have been generationally shafted. My ancestors are feeling this one. Okay, so we don't know. And the crackle's like the only one that seems good.

Yeah. I'm not sure, I like the regular Hershey's, but like still. It appears that we don't know if any wooden service pipes are still in service, but one was dug up in 2017. Seattle moment Yeah Wood supremacy Well it was just kind of like

You know it's there And you know I guess we should plum stuff And it None of this Like Seattle was not ever intended To become a city They were just like

It's a frontier town You know But I think I think it was like I'm gonna get the dates wrong Because I didn't write all of this down first But you know For For most of the 1870s

And going into the 1880s The Seattle population was like 10 or 12 men to every one woman. Like, it was just dudes cutting down trees. Some people, some people are going to have to transition. This is why they invented it then. One of Seattle's biggest early businesses next to logging was like running brothels because there was such a shortage of women.

Yeah, yeah, that's, yeah, it was, you know, there's a good crossover. It was very, everybody was like, damn, there's no ladies here. And they hadn't, they hadn't figured out how to distill the estrogen at a horse piss yet. So, oh boy. Thank you to whatever horse piss scientist or fetishist or both enabled the creation of the modern teagull. That was like ancient Greeks. I'm taking credit for that one. That's us.

Thank you, ancient Greek tea girls for inventing modern teagulls. Um, anyway, so, you know, hand-hue- Greatness consists in plants. hunting a tree whose shade you will never live to sit under or something. They would be so proud of like the messy-ass, gay, lesbian drama we've got going on in the city. Like, that is what they... Yeah, whenever like politicians are like, oh, we're like the ancient Romans or the ancient Greeks,

it's like, no, bullshit, we're like the ancient Romans or ancient Greeks. Yeah, yeah, at some point I was, I don't know, I was thinking about, I turned 30 recently, which means that my mortality feels so real because I get so old. Oh, trust me, wait until you're staring down the barrel of 35. Yeah. And I'm hearing a lot of hollow laughter from our own comment section. Yeah, I know that I'm not like, you know, that old, but also like, I finally get to look back at my 20s and say, like, those were a thing that happened. Nothing else is being written to look at my 20s.

As a trans woman, like, hitting your 30s or your mid 30s is like, oh shit, I get to be one of the red dots on the plane that wins arguments. Yeah. Yeah. So I like, I'm looking back and I'm like, Jesus, I feel like I've, you know, I used to read like stories about like, you know, queer life in like the 60s or 70s or whatever. And I was like, this seems wild. These people had like crazy lovers and they were like bouncing around the country all the time and they like, they had got laid constantly and like did like all of this crazy

shit, right? And had completely unconventional careers and existed basically outside of all of like what felt like proper society. And then I look back at my 20, I was like, oh shit, cool. That one, that worked out better than it, I thought it was gonna. I like being in my 30s better than being in my 20s. I'm gonna, I'm just gonna say that. I hope you treat this in the kind of spirit of admiration in which it's

sort of conveyed, you have old man spirit. Yeah, Ross, you were born, that's true, 65 years old. Yeah, yeah, that is accurate, yeah. Came out of the womb with like a model train and one hand. Get a cup of decaf coffee in the other. Half cap. Yeah, yeah, exactly.

Give me half-calf, not decaf. I'm not... His first words. Mama, mama! What is this full calf? Mama! This is vibrating off the ceiling. You know, some people say that you shouldn't feed a newborn baby espresso.

Some people are cowards. Those people are not Italians. Ross, you are 0% Italian. I'm 0% Italian, but I enjoy going there. I hate that the federal government keeps making us put what percent Italian we are in the podcast. It's like a Carlet Monroney label in here. Yeah.

I don't know how much like Moretti I have to drink to get my numbers up. Quite a bit. Start chugging, girlfriend. I got 5% other Western European, so plausibly there's Italian in there. I, yeah. 95% British and Irish. I am of the people who heard that in it, like, you know, who survived like famines and revolutions and, and like restorations and wars, and were told that an entire new world had opened up and went, nah, I'm going to stay.

I'm going to vomit. I have the complete opposite of a spirit of adventure in my heredity. Just like, no, I like it here, or I don't, but I'm not going to get in a boat. I think that's a big one. No, I don't think I've ever seen what I would describe as like joy at waking up in, like, the UK from British people. God, can you imagine? It seems like, it seems like every single person on the entirety of the British,

childs, like, wakes up and they're like, oh, fuck, every day. Yeah. And I'm the descendant of hundreds of years of people continuing to do that long enough to have children. Damn, the sun's not going to come up for another five hours. It's going to be there for 25 minutes. better than going to America. Yeah, well, the thing about Americans is, like, they keep, they're like the Northern Pacific

Railroad, and they just have to keep moving west until they finally get salt water and then be like, well, I'm still me. I guess I got to deal with my shit now. Is it more inspirational if I become an American at this point? And I, like, go to America and I'm the first in, like, hundreds of years of people who was like, you actually fuck this country? Like, it took this long for one of us to cotton on that it's shit and is going to stay shit for a I don't want to come here now.

Yeah, I know. I don't want to come in now. But like once the sort of peaceful transfer of power happens. Sure. Which it surely will. You could come to America. You could build a new life. You could build a business.

You could become, you could become the first trans woman in America. To start a podcast. Yeah. But the thing is, I managed to like start a new life and a business with Americans without ever leaving home, which is a fucked, a fun generation run, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. All right, so about this, about this wooden plumbing.

Oh, yeah, so the wooden plumbing. I didn't even get to the good part yet, which is that there are, every single water source is privately owned, and so there's like six different companies all competing. Oh, good, it's like municipal railways, awesome. Yes. Yeah. Yeah, it's like six different companies all competing with one another to be the source of water for your building, is.

I mean, I'm oversimplifying for humor, but yeah, you get the idea. It's entirely like parallel networks of water pipes and all that sort of shit. It's not like a super profitable thing to like install fire hydrants. They don't really start doing that until like the late 1880s. And then they like put up like five of them, right? Like they don't, there's nowhere near the density you would want for a bill for a city made entirely out of timber. You get a fire hydrant opposite the house that like is too rich to afford burning down, you know?

Yeah, yeah. But then you also have like the issue that, you know, that's a high pressure system and that's hard to do with wooden pipes. Yeah. Yeah. Well, so, so 18, in 1889, there was actually a ballot issue to municipalize all of the water system, bring it under, you know, central governmental control and unify it. But before they could get to the election, next slide, please. Oh, boy. At 2.15 p.m. on June 6th, 1889.

Oh, we got it real fucking quick, huh? In the basement of a shop... Yeah, why do you think I've been doing so many bits about how many fucking Mr. Good bars I have? Yeah. In the basement of a shop on the corner, it is now Madison and First. John Beck is working with a hot glue pot. This exact hot glue pot, actually. Oh, they saved the glue pot.

That's cool. It's the property of the Museum of History and Industry on Lake Union. You go visit the glue pot. Save this glue pot. It's going to be historic. John Beck is working with this exact hot glue pot. pot in a room that is whose floor is covered in turpentine-soaked wood chips. Oh, good.

Yes. That's just how I like to work. And the glue pot gets hot, so somebody covers it up, the wooden plank because it's around. There's wood everywhere. Yeah. And then the wood spontaneously ignites because the pot got too hot. And so somebody else gets the idea like, okay, let's throw cold water on this. And the glue fire scatters all over the room and ignites all of the turpentine-soaked

wood chips on the floor. And... It's gone poorly. June 16, 88, suddenly becomes a lot more important of a day. Would you believe that the corner of First and Madison is now a coffee shop? A likely thing to exist in Seattle, Washington. Wow. Wow.

Yeah, I'm cracking. Shout out to, I guess, Storyville coffee, corner of First and Madison. Fuck you in your third wave bullshit. Pick a tendency and stick with it. I have no idea about anything about that coffee shop. So, but I assume there's third way. I'm looking through the windows right now. I've made your walls.

Again, the future is weird. I have started, I've started a podcast, started a business with like Americans on the internet, and also I'm doxing a coffee shop on the internet. There's a guy drinking and driving in the street. driving in the street view on this. He's going bottle up to his face, and they pixelated his face and the... It might just be a walk the bottle, damn, I want to know what he was drinking. I still want to believe. Raspberry absolute.

Oh no. That man actually will not be a man much longer. I taste it every time you mention it. Ooh, yeah, I'll get there. Yeah. So anyway, the floor full of turpentine and glue. Oh, so a whole citywide game of the floor is lava, yes. You know, I've got the, if you're curious, I've got an interview with John back directly from the Seattle Post-Intelligencer.

If you'd like his direct thoughts on the matter. It's 1880s newspaper interview, so you don't get your hopes up too high. Quote, I cut some balls of glue and put them in the glue pot on the stove. I put in some shaving where there was. little fire and then went to work about 25 feet away near the front door after a while somebody said look at the glue another fellow of finlander from new york this is pointed out in the newspaper story i told you i told you everybody here's like we got a ton of nordic people it's super cool then took a piece of board and laid it on to smother the glue but the board caught fire then i ran and took a pot of water to

smother the fire and poured it all over the pot of blue which was blazing up high when i threw the water on the glue flew all over the shop into the shavings and ever everything take fire. It was all the Finns fault. Yeah. Can't believe a Finlander would do this. You have to know, it was, it was this one fucking Helsinki and he did. I was curious.

He did actually, he just disappeared from records. I thought he left the city. They are dastardly people. I guess he kind of felt bad. For reasons, it will become obvious shortly. Interviewed by name as starting the subject of, well, that's your problem episode. It's not looking good for you. Yeah.

It's like, oh. Hi, Bert. It was his birthday this weekend. His birthday? Everybody sang him a song and we got him some chudus and he got a catnip banana. Don't rub your face in the microphone, dude. Anyway, next slide, please. The Finn returned to his natural habitat, the cold forest.

Sniping at Soviets. Yeah, the thing is he had a sort of miswiring of the Scandinavian brain thing where there's a switch in your head that makes you try and kill as many Russians as possible. In this case, it's like it makes you try and kill as many Seattleites as possible. Well, he could have, yeah, he just had a really bad, he was like, I gotta destroy every timber building, I see. Geographically closest city I'm in to Russia needs to be destroyed right now. So, so the fire starts, it takes, so Seattle only has a volunteer fire department, right? It's kind of like a hole over from the pioneer days. We're like, well, we don't really need like an actual, Like, we don't want to pay for firefighters.

As you're growing into a, into a city, it's also a fun patrician thing you can do, right? Like being in the Night Watch, like in that Rembrandt painting, is to be like, getting in the volunteer fire department. It depends on the fire department. 19th century firefighting is interesting. I don't know about Seattle. I do know about Philadelphia, where it's essentially just ethnic gangs. Oh, shit.

All hated each other. Yeah. What is God is... It's on for a Finnish fire department. No, you would have like multiple fire companies show up, and the first thing they would do was vandalize each other's equipment. Bring that back. We can bring this back.

We can restore American greatness, which is taking a Halligan tool to the Serbian fire department take. No Bosnian. No Bosnian. It's going to extinguish this fire. Hey, Justin, Justin. You've never even, like, conceived to be possible before. Justin, you never thought about what it would be like if you were from Herzegovina?

Would you like to? Say that again. Because you would be Justin Bosniak. Oh, God. God. God. God. Damn it.

I gotta have about two drinks before recording more often. Like about till. I mean, okay, I should have two drinks before recording more often. Can't believe these Croats. Can we put the gin and tonics on the work card? Yeah. I mean, shit. You can fucking anything on the work card.

So the place where I had the gin and tonics, right? I was on my second gin and tonic when I turned to look at the wall behind me because someone was with pointed it out. I was covered in 10 types of like old police officers, so I think I may have gotten tipsy in a cop bar. Oh. Yeah, well. It happens.

Yeah, we've got it. Yeah, we've done it. That's true. I'm not proud of it. But they're not as bad as those dirty Serbs. Oh, oh, oh, these YouTube comments are not going to be kind of that's right. We've got to lose Liv Eager. Wait, isn't she, I don't remember, I don't remember Livago's ethnicity.

I frankly, it'd be weird if I could. Her ethnicity is Canadian. That's true, that is true. Well, so I don't, I don't think, if Seattle did have, like, rival ethnic gangs of, like, firefighters, I don't know about it. They came together like the warriors in this moment. To fail miserably, crucially, it takes them. both kinds. We got Norwegians and Swedes.

It takes them half an hour. I will see you out on the stream. Having a kind of Glasgow like school playground argument to discover whether or not a Serbian counts as Swedish or Norwegian. Yeah, we'll take them. We'll take them. Don't worry about that. We'll take them. It takes half an hour for them to find where the fire is. It's in the glue, weren't you listening? Well, because the fire is like in the, started in the basement of this building, which is like below grade. So they're kind of outside seeing all the smoke looking for fire and they can't find it. And by the time they finally do-

Right, because they raise the streets, right? Yeah. By the time they finally do by ripping up part of the sidewalk boards to like go looking for where the fire is at, the fire has already burned through the wooden basement wall that it was in and started to burn into the next one. And it's also caught the underside of the street on fire. That's some inception ship. They're like, yeah, yeah, the bottom of the street you're on is on fire. Yes, yes. After they've pulled up the sidewalk, they're like, oh shit, this is a fire. Technically you're now being like grilled at that point. Gently, I suppose, yeah. Broiled?

It's like how they make a whopper. It's like flame grilled. I get, yeah, you'd be flame grilled. Yeah, if you were under the sidewalk, you'd be getting broiled. Yeah. So they, so the firefighters find where the fire is finally after half an hour of letting it burn through the basement wall and into the next building. More like the fire finders. This photograph is taken like a couple hours in when it's like, oh, this is a problem, actually. You can see the massive crowd that is gathered to be like, damn, that's a crazy fire. Going out in the street to be like, damn, that's crazy has been one of the great American activities of all time.

I didn't have Netflix yet. I mean, even that now you do have Netflix. Americans, you'll still go out in the street and be like, damn, that's crazy. And it's like a frontier town. There's not like a ton to do besides like drink and gamble and I guess go to the brothel and... Yeah, I would definitely be gambling on how big the fire would go. Oh, yeah. Yeah.

Oh, yeah. The polymarket was fucking crazy. Yeah, I know it is. It's Seattle. Oh. Fuck you. So the firefighters tap into the hydrants, of which they can find, like, you know, three because there's hardly any in the city.

and they start spraying the fire down and then they lose all pressure immediately and they're extremely confused about this according to Paige Olson who is runs the last resort fire department which is a historical society that's got a bunch of vintage like fire trucks and stuff

in Seattle God that's cool you can just do anything I need to go I've tried to visit for this episode but because of the holiday I couldn't actually get in to see them because they're open for like one day a week

because it's a very small group but they do have an art deco fire station full of, like, vintage fire. Oh, that sounds fun. Yeah, I got to go. When we can do that, it's like, come to Seattle and we'll go visit the vintage fire department. I'm trying. Americans, please, peaceful transfer of power.

Yes. Or at least a border permeable enough to, like, smuggle me over. So, so page's theory on this is that basically the fire has eaten away at the underside of the street enough that it's actually caved in. a bunch of the wooden supports for the wooden pipes instead of burning through all of it and so it's lost the system loses all pressure

the sole pump house in the city is now just spitting water back out into Elliott Bay instead of actually like pressurizing the hydrant system and at this point you know the firefighters are like oh shit there's a direct quote from the Seattle Post intelligentser a cheer rose from the crowd as the beat

of engine number one was heard and two streams of water were turned on to the fire but the cheer of hope died away in wail of despair when after a few minutes pumping the streams they became so weak that they did not reach the top of the building showing that there was no water with which to fight the fiend of fire again great street faces to be like whoa oh oh no it gets better at this point at this point the massive crowd begins heckling of the firefighters yes an american tradition so yeah so they're like they're they're getting spit at meanwhile they're trying to to run hoses out to, you know, the Elliott Bay, they go, just suck up seawater. But it's low tide. So it takes them like, oh, another half an hour to run a hose down there.

Guy in like fire boots having to like inch his way over a mud flat to get to the water. Yeah, yeah. Well, being cackled. Yeah, people are throwing in garbage at you. Yeah, getting basseries thrown at you and shit. That's our thing. Sorry, I don't know what they throw at you and getting like estradiol. Like, vials throwing 18, 1889

Baird. Somebody says, no, this is the current modern day equivalent of somebody writes a call-out post for you. Actually, the Seattle Fire Department is contributing to an error of, like, unsafety. Seattle Fire Department can't get it up. Damn.

You have been a way better firefighters a heckler than me. So, yeah, so at this point, you know, By the time they finally actually have water, the fire is going, spreading through basements and under the streets, and advancing, like, in all directions at once. There's not like any single direction, because it's just sort of burning in a big circle. So, next slide, please. I've had Rimworld games go like this.

Yeah, so the fire reaches the next block where it reaches the Dietz and Meyer Liquor Store. Hmm. And, of course. Do you know Watson? Yeah. What? Oh, I was thinking Dietz and Watson, the meat purveyor, the meat guys, yeah. Oh, no, these guys?

They're meat guys? Yeah. Yeah, they're meat guys. Yeah. You don't got a meat guy? Come on. Not a real. I don't got a meat guy.

I'm sorry. You gotta get a meat guy. I'm fucking trying. What do you think I'm on the apps for? Geez. Yeah. Someone to provide you with delicious deli meats. This is deli meats.

Oh. Well, that too. I should be on an app for that, actually. Yeah, no, there should be an app for that, actually. A man just comes and provides you with wonderful deli meats. Well, it'll be Instacart of Instagram works. Slicer, but spelled without the E. So yeah, so at this point, the, you know, the heat of the fire explodes a bunch of barrels full of whiskey in the basement of a liquor store.

No! Which, you know, obviously is just like a shit ton of fuel to the fire. And it's very intense at this point. It's like, why does this fire smell so much like artificial raspberry flavoring? What's happened to me? Oh, whiskey, no. And chronology is, please forgive me, because the chronology of this is a little mixed, because reporting on even who started the fire or where it started wasn't correct

for like weeks afterward, it was kind of chaos. But at some point around now, the very massive ornate opera house burns down And everybody's kind of like, oh, shit, because that was actually a well-constructed building unlike the rest of these, like, storefronts are just kind of all burning through. You know, these were all, a lot of this is kind of like, yeah, we threw up this shack as fast as we could. That one was actually a building that they were like, oh, it's got like nice thick windows and walls and we care about it. And that catches fire and burns down. They're like, okay, this is going to be an actual problem.

Yeah, no, this is this is not, no one's stopping this thing. Yeah. Yeah, well, making matters worse, the fire chief, Josea Collins, is it a report. reportedly. I don't know. Like, some, some people insist this isn't true. I saw it in enough sources that I'm going to say it's true. He was at a firefighting convention in San Francisco, one of the fire broke out. Now, I mean, considering how the fire in San Francisco went a few years later, I don't think he learned anything. No. But the thing about the San Francisco fire, right, is like, if it hadn't followed like an eight and a half magnitude earthquake, it would

be like, yeah, it was mismanaged, but here they've got, here they had every chance possible to stop this first. It's just going to your 1880s firefighting convention and a guy takes the podium fires up 1880s PowerPoint and the slide just says, nothing we can do, throws his hands up and like gets a round of applause. Yeah, and then the next slide should work. The next slide says, you know, that Croats are dog people and serves a bed of bread. The problem is, like, it's a, it's a, it's a, it's a, like a weekend convention, but

the actual two weekend days of that are taken up with like, inter-ethnic fighting. Slurs, you've never heard of. Yeah, you get like, some slides, some presentations on like the Friday evening. And then Saturday morning through to Monday morning is just like, fist to cuffs, yeah. Yeah, slurs. No, that was actually a serious problem, uh, at least again, at least in Philadelphia. was fire companies going and trying to burn down each other's fire stations. Oh, yeah.

Of course, we attack them with their most hated enemy, fire. Sometimes they would steal, they would steal each other's fire engines. Being a firefighter arsonist, there's some real, like, Oppenheimer trying to harness the energy of the gods type shit, you know? It's like I fight the fire, but I also, you know, I used the fire to my kind of. Yeah, exactly. Now I am become Croatian destroyer of fire stations. Yeah, so the fire chief is gone out at, out of this firefighting convention.

Some people say it was a wedding. I like to believe it's a firefighting convention. Why not combine the two, you know? Getting married to a firefighting. trying to unite too desperate volunteer firefighting course. Yeah, Serbs of Cross. Doing Romeo and Juliet, but the Montague's and Capulets are different fire companies in 19th century Philly, I would watch the fuck out of that.

Yeah, we tell. Yeah, they're like Poles and Ukrainians. In many ways it's fucked up that the Ukrainians are in a sort of like fight for their life against the Russians, when the kind of natural, instinctive enemy of the Ukrainian is the pole, yeah. Yeah. It's true. Yeah. And like now you're in a situation where the Poles are like, you know, funding Ukrainian

defense and like, no wonder the Polish right wing get mad about it. Listen, it's one of those things where it's like, only I will defeat my nemesis. I don't need the Russians help to do this. Only I get to make mass graves of Ukrainians and then lie about it. Only me and maybe the boy, and by the boy I mean Lithuania. Yeah. Anyway, so the fire chief is gone. The brick opera house has burned down.

Oh, no. Fuck, my missed a good boss. Making things worse. The acting fire chief James Murphy was reportedly, they completely annihilated this guy in the press. The fairest description is that he was distraught. Oh, so read like dead drunk. Yeah, just absolutely like freaking the fuck out.

Dead to rights, right? So the mayor, Robert Moran, takes over, and he's like, all right, we have to, it's time to break out dynamite. We have to blow up this block of wooden buildings. Yeah, it's just a lot of cocaine. Guess what we're going to fucking do, boys? American mayors left to their own devices, even absent a firefighting situation, will be like, we have to blow up these poor people's houses with explosives. No, that's the next time they use the dynamite. The first time was just, it wasn't poor people's housing.

That's the next one. You got to stick with me here because the fire immediately, the fire blows directly over the new block of buildings they've just exploded. If the streets are wooden, I don't know what they were expecting to fucking accomplish here. I would like to order cheese steaks. Sorry, I was texting that. I like to, I like to read out my texts as I make them. Well, my phone is upstairs, so I was using the watch feature. What?

What? I'm very confused. What kind of Pennsylvania secret agent bullshit is this that you get to say, I think we should order cheese steaks into your wristwatch. Go-go gadget cheese steak. Shut up. My phone is upstairs because it's charging. Because it's a fast charger upstairs, right?

Okay, great. Are you still with me? My phone and watch are connected so I can talk to text and I can't be bothered to go upstairs to talk to my wife to order cheese. I love, I love, I love our work. So you talk into your watch, which sends it to your phone. Which sends it to my wife. It orders you a single pair.

I'm gonna kill me. I'm leaving that. First podcast to be destroyed by competing ethnic division. Surely not the first. First. One of us could steal all the, all the Patreon money and startup microbrewery, you know? Well, I mean, that's, why do you think Chapo got rid of Virgil, Texas? This is a pedophile?

No, I was, I was referencing a different leftist podcast. You're gonna have to bleep the word, and I'm gonna have to really insist that you called him a Croatian or something. I am. Not surprised you. Virgil Zagreb? I just like... Regions of Croatia.

What's the most Texas like? What is the Texas of Croatia? What is the Texas of Croatia? Istria. Virgil Istria. I just saw that movie a couple days ago. Virgil Dalmatia? Virgil Slavonia?

So anyway, everything's on fire and they're blowing up buildings. Yeah. You know, the thing is the fire is moving slow enough. They can like get stuff out of some of the buildings because all of the, all of these hastings. constructed shacks are made from old growth timber that would cost tens of thousands of dollars today because good i feel even better about this now the entirety of seattle was covered in these like huge old gorgeous forests and they tore them all down to make these hastily constructed shitty-ass buildings um so the fire burns relatively slowly through them because the you know the wood is so dense um and they try and save like a handful of buildings um there's like they take the courthouse and they run bucket brigade all the way up to guys on the roof who just pour water down the sides of the building to keep it cool enough to from sparking um because the hoses don't have enough pressure

to reach above the first floor at this point and you know the courthouse is full of records and they were apparently they apparently were conducting a murder trial until like the fire was like two blocks away and then they were like all right courts adjourned we got to stop the building from burning down also also a good setup for a movie but also just like the most frontier town shit you've ever heard. You know, this is just Seattle was like ruggedly clinging to the ways of the old West by being stupid and obstinate to the last possible second. Then they decide, okay, let's blow up all the poor people's houses to try and save the mill. And it doesn't do anything except like prepare the city for what Robert Moses will do in another century

to the same neighborhood, which is just go through and blow up a bunch of people's houses. Hi, Bert. Bert. Bert is back. Hi, Bert. We're a strongly pro-Burt podcast. Yes.

Pro-Burt, anti-Robert Moses. To be clear, if you're writing in the comments, Bert is spelled with a U. Yes, his name is, he's named for Bert Reynolds. This full name is Bertholomew Reynolds. Oh. He is seven. All right, anyway. Sorry, I'm distracting myself.

No, it's my fault. What I've done is I've introduced a bonus episode energy into the mainline episode. episode. So if you're on the fence about subscribing to the Patreon, it's all like this. Yeah. For good or real. If you like this, subscribe to the Patreon. If you don't like this, subscribe to the Patreon anyway, please, but you're not going to enjoy it. No. Yeah, just give us money anyway. So yeah, subscribe to the Patreon because it's helping pay my rent while I'm, you know, for real. Guest, guest hosting. And that's it, it's praxis actually to fund a trans women's apartment in Seattle. I think that's true. This is true. It is. Um, anyway, so yeah,

I actually, you know, speaking of Seattle and places, I don't live that far from here. It's kind of cool. I, like, went down there and had a coffee, like, as I was writing these slides, when I went to the library that's, like, two blocks away to research this episode with their files in the city. This is fun. But anyway, so at this point, you know, they blow it up a couple blocks of houses, and they're like, this isn't working. This whole city's going to burn down.

So people, like, take their, either, you know, try to grab their valuables and run up into the hills, basically outside of the city, or they put it all on a wharf to take it out into the middle of Elliott Bay, where the water would protect them. But of course, like, the, it's unclear how well this worked. Contemporary reporting wasn't, like, some people were like, oh, they saved most of the valuables, and some people were like, everybody lost everything, and I wasn't quite sure which was true. This would be a great, a great time and place to start stealing. All of the wharves burned to the ground. And yes, on that note, they, you know, they, at this point, the fire is audible for miles in any direction because of how loud it's just like all of these

buildings burning are. They could see smoke in Tacoma, 30 miles south. They call in reinforcements from Portland and Victoria, British Columbia, not to help fight the fire, but to help prevent looting. They do. They're onto my stealing, I do. Oh my God. Damn. Next, next. They're going to bring in, I don't know, like, like some Italians or some some Portuguese or something, my God. They're pretty Canadians. Bert, I'm begging you. Please stop.

Anyway, this is, I just put this sliding because I thought it was funny because the concept of an insurance company sponsoring this exhibition specifically was, just made me chuckle. It's like, here's the time when we really ate shit. Yeah. Yeah.

Remember the time the city that you, because this is for the Seattle Museum of History who has the pot now, the glue pot. So this is just like, hey, you remember the time that the city you live in burned to the ground? You should buy all the insurance. I like the sort of illustration of all of these beautiful hose teams, you know, working with their high pressure hoses that we know that they didn't have. Yeah, no. No, this, this, this illustration is very much like, oh wow, look at how valiant they were fighting the fire. And it's like, now they just kind of kind of had to give up. Like they, at this point,

these guys are kind of like doing the like Chad versus soy, you know, meme where they're sort of walking with with their backs hunched over as they're getting heckled and pelted with trash. Yeah, these guys aren't getting pelted with nearly enough trash. Yeah, yeah, no. So next slide, please. Go on down. You're getting called Macedonians. So the fire burns until 3 a.m. June 7th, the next day.

Exact amount of fire is a little bit hard to come by. But estimates are, modern estimates are about 120 acres. or 58 blocks. Jesus. Plus, like, almost every wharf in the city. It burned down Yessler's Mill and a handful of other mills. It burns in a railroad station and, like, the railroad dock. No one dies.

Huh. Which is insane. That's really impressive. Yeah. And you aren't getting any help from the firefighters because they were all sort of fending off garbage. Yeah. And doing ethnic wars. Yeah.

Sov-keypun, motherfucker. It is estimated that a million rats died. That is a real gross estimate. Yeah, that's a lot of rats. Who volunteered that particular statistic? Just the rat man arrives in the offices of the post-intelligencer to be like, by the way. I can't get a thorough census. I'm missing one million rats.

Yeah. The Piper, what are you doing here? Ratskyorg walks into. I am missing 1,000 instances of the end of the movie wanted. The end of the movie. into the movie Ratatooie. Yeah, that's true. That is true.

Another movie which features rats. Yeah. That said, it does do $20 million in damage, which inflation adjusted. Is that a counting for rats or now? No, I think that was actually a bonus. They were like, ooh. It's a rounding error. Don't worry about that.

Yeah, yeah. They were like, ooh, now we won't get the plague. Because we finally get rid of a rat infestation. 20 million dollars of damage, one million rats worth of improved. No, all those rats were the Ratatoui rats. They fucked up the Seattle culinary scene for... Yeah, that's why it damaged the sort of oat cuisine of Seattle so badly that they had to set pig in Portland.

Yeah. It's a good movie. Anyway, the inflation adjusted, it's about $700 million worth of damage. Jesus. And of course, there's like... Next slide, please. There's like no city left. I have to pee.

I'll be right back. Go pee. Go piss, girl. Like, that's, that's looking out on the water. You can see that, like, everything, everything is burned to the ground. Yeah, that's, that's match sticks. Should I wait? No, it's fine.

No. Oh, I mean, if you want to talk about, like, you know, give you some like Hershey's opinions or something of that nature, that's fine. We can do that, but. No, I have a, I have a Rudeyard Kipling quote because he visited, he was doing a tour of the West Coast and went to Tacoma. and then he had, like, stop to refuel in Seattle. Richard and Kipling doing a tour of the West Coast being like, all right, so you guys think that you're casual racists. Let me introduce you to a professional racist.

A ranked competitive racist. This is how I know too much of my humor has come from listening to you make jokes on this podcast because I was about to make the same fucking joke. It's ultimately, it's a sort of a closed, loop. It's basically incest, what we're doing. I listen to this show basically constantly. You are my baby joke sister, and you have gotten all of your jokes from me, and that's fine. People will appreciate getting the jokes in stereo.

No, I, Richard Kipling being like, I am so racist that I've written, like, poems, a form of racism that the American mind cannot comprehend yet. just incredible Americans did love to import a sort of British man of letters like Dickens came out there and you know like a bunch of others and yeah I'm

desperately curious what impression America left on Rudyard Keppling well so he visited it immediately upon it burning to the ground okay so probably not a great one so this is his quote have I told you anything about Seattle the town that was burned out a few weeks ago

when the insurance men at San Francisco took their losses with a grin. In the ghostly twilight, just as the forest fires were beginning to glare from the unthrifty islands, we struck it heavily for the wharves had all been burned down, and we tied up where we could, crashing into the rotten foundations of a boathouse as a pig roots in high grass. The town was built upon a hill. That is true.

In the heart of the business quarters, there was a horrible black smudge, as though a hand, capitalized hand, had come down and rubbed the place. smooth. I know now what being wiped out means. The smudge seemed to be about a mile long and its blackness was relieved by tents in which men were doing the business with the wreck of the stock they had saved. Incredible. That's, that's Rudyard Kipling upon seeing Seattle, which looked like this when he showed up. So yeah, it was pretty bad. I, you know, when he says hand with capital letters, you know what I'm thinking of? No. That's right. It's master hand from Super Smash brother.

Next slide, please. Final destination, no items only flocked. Come out and fight, coward. So June 7th, 1889, the day after, the embers aren't even cold yet. And all the businessmen in the city get together. And they're like, all right, let's do another one for real.

That was a goofy one. Let's do a city for real this time. They mobilized the National Guard, looting. They do not declare martial law, although they do note the arrest of a man wearing four brand new suits at once. Is it illegal? Is it illegal, your honor,

to look fly as hell? Yeah, I didn't know it was a crime to have that shit on. It's called layering. Yeah Your honor They call me They call me ranch Because I'd be dressing

So so they take this They keep the They keep more or less the same Kind of like street grid But they widen all the streets They regrade up to 22 feet higher Than the city previously was Which nowadays you actually go visit

It's like they call it the Seattle Underground Tour because you can like see the original street level They built a bunch of the city at And they just built all the streets over that And that's just kind of like this really hope the underground doesn't burn down again. Well, that's the thing, right? It's like they actually wrote a fire code and like a building code.

Wow. So all the new buildings that they built had to be made on a brick. And they had to be like- Have they considered having three fire codes, though? All at one. No, just the one. Like, we vastly need to increase the amount of bricks in Seattle. To which I say, open the border.

You know, I had a joke in here for that. There's a slider there. Yeah, I noticed that. I shouldn't say it. I thought you might be doing a kind of like secret word thing where you're going to set up a Claxton the first time I made like a self-deprecating trans joke. I mean, I should, we should do that. I should have a soundboard that just like, if it does like the red alarm.

I mean, this kind of self-deprecation pays my rent. Do we need to start practicing like radical self-care and like being nice about ourselves? Or is that, would that make it worse? Like, would that be the thing that, like, dynamites the whole enterprise? We'll all become like, uh, we'll become like, uh, tech startup guys then. Doing like wellness tips. Yeah, no, you gotta, yeah, yeah, exactly. You gotta give me, I want some, yeah, we gotta do the start there and then I want fresh blood.

That's my next, that's my next one is gonna have your blood boy. Yeah. Yeah, I need, I want somebody just like a mad Mac style. If you don't have any self-loat, if you don't have any self-loathing, that's a problem. I think the world hates us enough. We don't need to like help them out. I remember that time I got yelled at in the comments for telling November I loved her I remember that did you I don't I don't remember that sounds about right though

so it was like oh oh braz I will fuck you up buddy you express love in different ways it's fine yeah yeah exactly it's like I yeah you're not supposed to say that it's supposed to be implied why these nuts next no I'm I'm I'm the kind of a trans women where like, you know, for my birthday, you know, Nova brought me out to Glasgow and I got to like travel overseas for the first time. I had this incredible time visiting all the museums and having all this fun stuff. And I was like, I don't know if she like actually likes me or we're just like, if we're like really friends or she's like being nice to me. Killer and ate her. Oh. Oh, Jesus.

I saw a picture of everyone in front of the house and Gareth. Yeah, no, and the whole time I was thinking, I wonder if all these people like me, or if they're just kind of tolerating my presence, you know? I'm probably really annoying, though. Yeah, remember how early on we joked that the podcast now is a project to make my self-esteem better? The thing that nobody tells you is that when you transition, there's actually a limited pool of self-esteem that trans women are allowed to draw from. Three trans women all pass on the same self-esteem. It's like orange cats in the single brain cell. So, like, the more self-esteem I get, I actually drain it actively from November.

Every day I wake up, I'm like, you know, I feel pretty good about myself. And no one's going to bed like, God, I fucking hate myself. Yeah, that's track. It wasn't my turn to use the self-esteem. Anyway, yeah, so they've instituted building code, a city of Seattle. They're like, shit. What if we did like a real city this time? They vote on that water supply issue.

It wins by 1875 to 51. So we get city water. And then they start doing a whole watershed project. Having the city kind of having burned down the week before kind of helps. single one of the 30,000 citizens watching, heckling the fire department, as they watched the hoses fail, probably did have some of the- Macedonian dog boys. You're not very good at this.

It's a bunch of fucking Greeks down here. Hey, hey! Just rolling into the Seattle City Council meeting and being like, so 51 Bulgarians thing. We don't need... Oh, we are going to get yelled at. Listen, if you're in the comments, if you're sort of patriotic for your country, whichever one it is, just say, and say it's the best one. Yeah, yeah, exactly.

Actually, give us the engagement, you fuck thick. I'm still clicking around the corner of First and, whatever. Yeah, first in Madison, and we got a guy walking a tiny, tiny, tiny, any dog here and we got a guy passed out at like in the front of the coffee shop. Common, common Seattle scenes, yes. Beautiful. No, I was going to say if we didn't have enough coffee. If we get enough into the like ethnic grievances, if we can really dig deep.

Oh, I can do that. I think YouTube will start recommending this to people. That's true. That's true. But the thing is we've got to start offering like life lessons about trad masculinity or something. Yeah, exactly. Like, you know, the superior European race is Romanian. I don't know what the superior European race is, but it is not Romanian, my guy.

I mean, I'm probably about as qualified as like Jordan Peterson to give masculinity tips. Yeah. It's something about rats. What would Jordan Peterson have made of the total rat genocide of Seattle in 1889? Of like 90% of like masculinity influencers. I know how to change a flat tire. Allow me to be your father. Yeah, sure.

All right. I like the fuck. I know where the 716th wrench is. No, I don't know that actually. Obviously, I lost that one. True men have two 10mm socket so they can lose both of them. Yeah. Anyway, yeah, they regrade the city.

they got to build out of brick. Next slide, please. This is a map of the city shortly after the fire. All of those orange buildings are like basically new builds out of brick. So they revamp the whole city. The population expands massively because they bring in all of these like masons and brick layers to like help rebuild. It goes from, you know, somewhere around 30,000 to 40,000 in the span of like a year. Wow.

They rebuild everything. You know, they didn't lose as much property as like they did during like, you know, say with like the SF fire. or, you know, the same year actually, Spokane and Ellensburg to other cities in Washington also burned down. And those, you know, they didn't have like the bay there to like throw a bunch of property into. It burned quicker. Oh, no, my theft. So, yeah, so they were actually able to bounce back from this pretty quickly. And, you know, then, you know, the city is freshly rebuilt.

There's a bunch of economic problems in the 1890s. We talked about that on the Cascades Duralment episode. but in 1897 you know the the Yukon gold rush starts and Seattle is like the last big city before you make it to the Yukon and you have to like take supplies with you in order to be led into the Yukon and so that's like becomes the resupply point so by 1900 the city is the city has 80,000 people the population doubles in the span of a decade wow mostly just to supply these people who are all headed north to strike it rich or much more likely die of exposure strike it poor yeah strike it poor and die strike it dead sell shovels dickheads sell shovels is the motto of seattle like every time it's got a a population boom it's because they don't it's not like they've it's like they found anything here where they're like oh let's see to make money off this they just let's just do whatever is hot right now we got boeing here we have you know amazon they don't actually make anything they just

help the guys who make things yeah yeah i have a question Yes. What is this wacky bridge? That is a rail bridge that connects. That was across the mouth of the Duwamish, which was still mudflat. So it's really shallow, so it's just a trestle with like a little turny bridge in it. Like a horrible trestle and then you just go across and then there's a pier on the other side. Yep.

I like it. Right where that is now, that's actually the West Seattle Bridge. There's like a big, there's a huge, huge like interstate height bridge that, you know, big ships can get under and then there's a couple of draw bridges still there for like local surface streets but all of that uh like where we're basically from everywhere that that that trestle comes out down to uh about the mouth of that river that's all infill now and we have like stadium um and you know the like all of sodo so a bunch of warehouse yeah all of that car dealerships yeah it's like a lucid dealership there now you know that's all infilled um and then we polluted

the absolute hell out of the duamish and you know That's probably another episode. It was a super fun site for a while. Still not great. But in any case, you know, 1900, the city is, the city has expanded massively. They actually got a, they actually did build a real city. Next slide, please. So this is, this is actually it today. This is the new buildings are what we call in Seattle now Pioneer Square, which is the oldest remaining district of Seattle. Looks, looks very nice. I want to move here and start dating between eight and 16 puppy girls. Yeah, that's too many people. Well, you know, nobody lives in Pioneer Square. It's just like we're tourists go.

That's like, I want to take the puppy girls on like 8 to 16 leashes, like that one photo of Daniel Radcliffe, and I'll take them to Pioneer Square. We can hang out, and then we go back to Capitol Hill and, like, you know. For people who don't live in Seattle, I do actually see, like, transmen being walked on leashes, like, not regularly, but not unregulally. I thought there was like a greater Seattle pollicule that you had to be a point. part of. There isn't, and you should be scared of anybody who's telling you that you have to be.

Oh, I see. Okay. Okay. I don't know. I thought there was some kind of like dominant, like, political force there. There's several different, so there's a couple of different polycules. We all run a fire department. It's just stealing the engine.

Yeah. You should see it when the she, her company runs into the they, them company. My God, they're fighting each other. Oh, wait, they're not, that's not fighting. I didn't know you could use a hose that way. The any pronouns fire company? Yeah, so now, you know, we have... ZZM, various neo pronouns, you know?

Now we have a, now we've pedestrianized a few of these and you can pretend that you live in a paradise where cars don't rule all of America and walk around and and you know see this isn't like cool bookstores and stuff it's like it is actually kind of cool notably like this is actually they almost bulldozed all of it in the 60s during another one of Seattle's growth periods because it was dilapidated and shitty and it was full of queer people because it was the only place that could hang out and not get arrested and then somebody somebody big locally was like no we should save it make it a historic preservation district so they did and then they pushed all the queer

people out and arrested a bunch of them so the queer people fled up into the city and they learned to seek higher ground and now they all live on Capitol Hill. Well, most of them, I don't, I used to live on Capitol Hill and then they, the Tech Bros kind of encroached and pushed me out. So I'm like further down the hill now, but you know, nonetheless, quayness remains alive in Seattle, which is the, yeah, I just, we have like seven hills, so you can just live on one of them, you know. You got to look down at all of the like Microsoft guys commuting to their job in their car and as they sieve in traffic. You got to, you got to put the barricades up, you know, you

got a you know we got our we got woke mayor so she said that she's going to help build more bus lanes so I'm personally hoping that they dynamite all of Denny way and replace it with a big bus lane oh yeah oh there you will replace with iHop avenue yeah well we're about to get that we're like in theoretically a couple of weeks I'm hoping to be the first I'm hoping to ride the inaugural like passenger journey we'll see if I can actually swing it but they're opening the one line two line connection So we have two trains. They go across the lake.

And they are connecting them with a floating bridge. There's actually the longest floating bridge in the world. Or second longest. I can never remember. We have both of them. But it'll only become a well, that's your problem episode. It'll be dangerously around. Running across a floating bridge in the world.

I'm so excited. Yes. It's the only, that's the only train floating bridge in the world, I think, ever. I don't think anyone's tried it before. It's crazy. And in traditional Seattle fashion, what we do is we do an incredibly cool engineering project it takes three times as long as it should and like three times the budget and then it opens and you're kind of like well this has some structural problems but it is cool yes um so i'm excited to to say that i was there it's kind of like a we i wrote uh we hybridized are the first of what is supposed to be a fleet of hybrid ferries um recently and i was on the maiden void like hybrid voyage of that and it was really cool and then it's broken down like three or four times since then and we won't have shore power to charge it with for like another five

years that's kind of just like a really expensive project to like put a big battery that you can't really use we've run the diesel engine in a slightly different way yeah yeah but yeah the great Seattle fire was actually kind of it was it's sort of like the the perfect infrastructure project and then a big disaster happens no one dies and then it creates so many jobs that everybody's actually kind of happy it happened like most most businessmen were like yeah that's actually pretty cool that that's shitty old building I was in burned down.

Now I get to like work in an actual store and the sewage isn't flooding the streets and the basements aren't made of wood. Can't do that today because of woke, you know. Now you have to build some kind of like memorial or something, you know, like one million rats memorial. Yeah, you replaced the whole burned area with a park. The historic burned area districts. The burned over district.

That's in New York. And then then you start Mormonism, future bonus episode whenever we bother to get, reach out to the, um, uh, bringing young money, guys. Yeah, yeah. Part of the reason Seattle's so cool is that it's like the least religious city in America. Huh. Oh. Nobody believes in anything here. Open the capital and puppy girls.

Open the border. You're gonna have to go over there with a great, great white fleet. Open up the United States of America. Yeah. We would welcome you as liberators. President Scheinbaum, my friend's country, the United States of America, yearns for freedom. Yes. My country, the United Kingdom, also yearns for freedom, and I, for one, will greet Mexican troops as liberators, provided they're not, you know, the Mexican Navy who are here to kill me.

The Navy, yeah, exactly. Well, they're offshore and they're on the boats. Well, that's all I got. It's crazy how all that happened. We learned that it's actually sometimes good to burn a city to the ground. It's part of the life cycle. I wish I hadn't been made of old-growth timber. It's like the pine barrens, exactly. Yeah.

You know, sometimes if you don't burn a city to the ground, it never grows. I still have like 50 fucking Mr. Goodbarz. You should heckle your volunteer firefighters. Yeah, well, they're probably proud. You know, find new and exciting ethnic slurs to call them. Develop a series of like inter-bulken beefs to throw at your firefighters. Do you hate Belarusians? Not enough.

Yeah, talk to my dad about that. Something about collaborators, I don't know. Yeah. Go back to Smolensk. Well, we have a segment on this podcast called Safety Third. Shake hands for danger. Dear Justin, Liam and November. No mention of Victoria.

No mention of Daven. mention of Sam, the Research Assistant, this is bullshit. Yeah, not even milkshake. Not even, but. Yeah, not even Bert. And it's his birthday. It's his birthday, yeah. It's his birthday, yeah.

You didn't mention Corinne, it's her anniversary. Yeah. Don't read this one. Alright, yes, I'm ready. Hit me with it. Many years ago, I worked as a student temp for my large state university. Yeah, I noticed that L.S. and U.S. you are all capitalized.

Yeah. Yeah. The, go in dumb, come out dumb too. The union workers graciously taught us how to avoid danger. They swathed us

with face shields and gloves and made sure we wore leather boots. I was chosen to mow lawns because I was a girl. My boss, a former Marine instructor concluded that, whether for reasons of biology or socialization, young women do fewer stupid things than young men. That is not true.

The stupid things just present differently. Yeah, it's a damn truth. That's it. I'm a moron, so, also not young. The last two student mowers were male, and each had flipped a tractor over. Who amongst us? Legends. Man of class.

Yeah. One had mown a hill laterally and toppled sideways, the other had tried to pop wheelies and succeeded too well. Yeah. Just perfectly land in a way that compresses every vertebra in your spine, like Jeremy Renner. Thus, notwithstanding my entire lack of driving experience, I was selected. I learned to back up small trailers and to start tractors with a cabinet key because the original keys had fallen out of the ignition switch into the

grass, then to use a paper clip once someone lost the cabinet key, and I never flipped a tractor over. The union men allowed me to mow until noon because it's hot in the summer on large state university's unshaded lawns, and they didn't want to give the temp sunstroke. I was trained by an honest-to-god horticulturalist, how to correctly prune anything I could reach, and he didn't do a lick of work otherwise, but he did teach me the horticulture joke. You can lead a horticulture, but you can't make a think. Sure. Yeah, we've all...

It's a Dorothy Parker joke. Yes. And he taught me to take breaks and drink fluids and not get heat stroke. This jolly occupation was ruined when large state university was selected to host a national convention of university housing departments, and we had to prepare for an onslaught of guests. Parts of large state university lie among squids. country lanes and a superimposed military grid of roads one, two, and three. Even locals get lost out there so we needed signage for visitors. And my unit was lent to a different unit to

create those signs. My new unit supervisor John was in a hurry. And our use of saber saws and spray paint did not meet safety standards, but no one made a fuss until John told the union men to cut lumber with a table saw. The shop steward said, No, that was out of title work in a higher pay scale. You need the international brotherhood of table saw operators. Yes. But they'd do it if John brought in a competent trainer to teach them to use the saw because then they could boast that they had that skill in pursuit of other large state university jobs.

Now, John said, you need training to use a table saw? I'll show you how to use a table saw. Pride cometh before the fingers come off. The folks at the hospital reattached most parts of John's fingers. And during his recuperation, the department brought in a real trainer. The men learned to use a table saw with a guard. What did I learn? To seek union employment.

That's right. I found state workers to be highly risk averse. They neither flip vehicles, nor saw their fingers off. I retired with all my appendages. That is union education. Why do you want a union job? Because you will have all of your fingers.

Perhaps young people listening to your presentations will take note. Thank you for your support of safety from shop steward Sandra. Fantastic. Thank you, Sandra. Thank you, thank you unions for being a sort of sterling, example of their own necessity. That was beautifully told as well. This is the exact kind of length that we want.

This is a really good thing. The comedic timing? Yeah. Magnificent. I like how it was implied. Yeah. It's all done an implication. It's done an ellipsis.

It's fantastic. It was wonderful. Well, that was 63rd. Shake hands with danger. Our next episode will be on Chernobyl. Does anyone have any commercials before we go? Please come to the live shows. Please listen to all of the other podcasts.

Yes. A happy anniversary to Liam and Corinne. Thank you. Happy birthday to Bert. Yes. Made it with seven minutes to spare, baby. Yeah. All right.

Good night, everybody. All right. Good night, everyone.