Well with Arielle Lorre - 150: How to Sleep Better with Dr. Whitney Roban

Episode Date: January 19, 2022

In this episode I’m talking to sleep specialist Dr. Whitney Roban about how to, of course, improve our sleep. We discuss why sleep is is so important and what happens during sleep aside from getting rest; what happens to our bodies when we don’t get enough sleep; how much sleep is considered healthy; why sleep quality is so important; what we might be doing during the day that could be negatively impacting sleep and conversely, daily habits that can help improve our sleep; easy adjustments we can start making today to optimize sleep; the ideal nighttime routine, and so much more.   www.Athleticgreens.com/blondefiles for a free 1 year supply of Vitamin D and 5 free travel packs with your first purchase. www.Foriawellness.com/BLONDE for 20% off your first order. www.Keanhealth.com with code "blonde" for 20% off your order. www.Headspace.com/BLONDE for one month of free access to their entire mindfulness library.   Produced by Dear MediaSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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Go to your rise-adviseur or Sunnycars. The following podcast is a dear media production. Hey, welcome to the Blond Files podcast. I'm your host, Ariel Lori, and I'm here to talk all things wellness. From how to achieve optimal health and well-being to the best beauty tips and everything in between, no topic is off limits. I know there is so much information out there, so I'm here to help you navigate it all and live your best life. Thanks for listening. Let's get into it. Hi, everybody. Welcome to the show. I have such a good episode for you today. And it's about one of my favorite subjects, which is sleep. I'm laughing because anybody who knows me knows that I go to bed super early. I take my sleep very seriously.

And it's something that I really kind of honed in on in the past year. I mean, ever since I got sober, I stopped going to bed really late and try to practice really good sleep hygiene. But in the past year, it just became more important than ever for me. to make sure that I'm not only getting enough sleep, but getting quality sleep. Because for me, it really is the foundation upon which the entire rest of my well-being is built. If I am sleep deprived, my appetite is all over the place. My energy is all over the place. My mood is all over the place. It's hard for me to concentrate. You know, hormones can get thrown off all these different things. And so for me, like, I even think my nighttime routine is,

is more important than my morning routine because if I wake up and I only got six hours of sleep or poor quality, I already feel like shit starting the day. Excuse my language. So super important to me and I know so many people have trouble sleeping nowadays. So I wanted to bring on an expert and that's where my guest. Dr. Whitney Roban comes in. She is a leading sleep expert. She is trained as a clinical psychologist, but now she works with families and corporations and school districts to help people optimize their sleep. She has also been featured in publications such as the New York Times, CNN, The Today Show, NBC Forbes, Business Insider, GQ Rolling Stone Women's Health and Working Mother. She's also the author of multiple award-winning books. And she

is the founder of Solve Our Sleep. So her mission is to provide the sleep education and support family, students, teachers, and employees need not only to survive, but to thrive. And she has so many tips that you can start implementing today to support your sleep. And she talks about things that you might be doing during your day that you don't even realize are negatively impacting your sleep and also things that you can be doing to support it. And, so much more. So enjoy the episode. Welcome to the show. So excited to have you here. So happy to be here. We're a little off our game, I think, because we just went through 20 minutes of technological issues. And it's Monday morning. But really excited to talk to you about sleep. As I mentioned in my initial email to you, you know, I talk about everything kind of under the wellness umbrella here, health and wellness. And I think sleep is, is kind of this thing that is often overlooked.

And we feel like we have to focus on like productivity and efficiency and diet and nutrition. And I feel like sleep is kind of the foundation for all of that, at least for me. I totally agree. I love starting off with that because that is what I talk about every single day. It's the umbrella that overarches everything that we do. You can't be healthy without sleep. Yeah. Yeah.

I'm the kind of person where I mean, I really function my best. between seven and a half and eight hours. If I get less than seven, maybe less than six and a half, I mean, I am a freaking disaster. It's like, don't talk to me. I want to like eat the entire kitchen all day and we'll get into this. I'm irritable. I am kind of just discombobulated, you know, frazzled, all of these things, anxious. I know not everybody operates that way. So we'll get into all of this. But to start, why don't you just introduce yourself to the audience and tell them about who you are and what you do. Sure. So my name is Dr. Whitney Roban. I'm a family educational and corporate sleep specialist. I'm actually a clinical psychologist by training, but I've been working solely in the

field of sleep for about 17 years now. And the name of my company is solve our sleep. So I have a family sleep practice. I work with all members of a family to get better sleep. Educational component is I work in schools to teach kids how to get better sleep. And then the corporate stuff I work in corporations with managers, see sweet executives to do sleep education and sleep coaching. How and why did you end up on sleep? Yeah, it's a great question. It's actually a long story, which I'll make a little short, but it's kind of interesting for anybody that might be listening that's thinking of getting into this field. My journey definitely was not linear at all. And the two things that affected me moving into sleep were my children and non-11. So many years ago on

September 11, 2001 was the day that I found that I was pregnant with my first child. And I was living in New York City, downtown, literally standing on my street corner, watching the towers burn and fall. And that was the day I found out that I was bringing a new life into the world. And my whole kind of outlook on the rest of life and being a parent changed. So I worked out with my company at the time that when I, after I gave birth, I would do something called hybrid working, which back then nobody did, right? It wasn't what we talked about. They were very progressive and I was going to go in part-time and work from home part-time. And then the head of my company moved over to the Red Cross. They needed her help with 9-11 and the new CEO said, back to work all or nothing. And I know a lot of parents

now are struggling with this. And I said, you know what? I'm going to stay home for a bit and I'm going to take nothing and I stayed home with my son. But he wasn't really planning on being a stay-at-home parent and he didn't sleep. He said, wait a second. Kind of like you. I always love sleep. I know how much sleep I needed. He said, how good to make it is this parent thing? Sleep deprived, no way. So I got him sleeping great.

And I did a lot of mommy and me classes at the 14th Street Y in the city. And the head of the 14th Street Y said to me, you know, you're really good at this. You should do this as a business. And like I said, this was 19 years ago. He said, it's not a thing. There weren't. No one talked about sleep then. It was like a badge of honor to not sleep.

wellness wasn't an issue. You know, it wasn't a hot topic. And I said, all right, well, I guess maybe, you know, there's a few people that do this. Anyway, I answered getting pregnant with my second child. And my husband at the time got a job in L.A. He was in the phone business. So we moved to Los Angeles. And my second child didn't sleep.

And one of the kids in L.A. were sleeping. And I said, well, if it's happening on both coasts, there's a good chance that people aren't sleeping everywhere. And that's really when he was six months old, I started my family sleep practice. and I never look back. I've just worked solely in the field of sleep since then. What are some of the biggest things that you've learned over the years? I mean, we'll get into all of this, but is there anything that stands out to you,

like that was just so profound for you that you didn't know? I think the thing that's most interesting to me about sleep and what people don't realize is it's something where if you put in the devotion and the effort and the education to understanding the importance of it, small changes you can make on a daily basis can have such big effect on sleep, which in turn can have such an enormous effect on our life. Everything that we do physically, emotionally, behaviorally is affected by sleep. So it's this one thing we do every single day. And if we just put in a little bit of effort, our whole life can be better as a result. So I think maybe, you know,

that's really what it is. It's life changing. is what sleep is. Something that helped me so much with my sleep was meditation. Of course, I talk about this all the time. Not only did it help with that, but it helped with my ability to respond to stress, my ability to handle anxiety, my reactivity. It helped with my relationships, my mood, my energy, so many different things. And honestly, I think it's something that we all need to be practicing in this coming year. So really great place to start and to maintain your meditation practice is headspace. It is your convenient dose of meditation, mindfulness, and sleep exercises to relieve stress and anxiety and help you get a good night's sleep all in one app,

making it super easy to catch your breath and make time for your mental health. And it's one of the most science-backed meditation apps in the world, proving, meditation works. In fact, a study proves in just two weeks, Headspace can reduce your stress by 14%. So I have teamed up with Headspace and they are going to share a meditation here so that you guys can all give it a try without downloading the app and hopefully you will be inspired to after you do this. So let's give it a try. So either sitting down or lying down, just taking a big deep breath in through the nose and out through the mouth. As you breathe out, you can just gently close the eyes and just feeling the weight of the body, pressing down, allowing any tension to release. Imagining the muscles

in the body, just switching off, relaxing, letting go of any tension. Just feeling the body sink deeper. down to the seat or the floor beneath you. And you can either gently open the eyes again or just leave them shut now. So if you want to find some more headspace, you can go to headspace.com slash blonde and get one month free of their entire meditation library. This is the best headspace offer available. So again, go to headspace.com slash blonde, B-L-O-N-D-E. to get one month free of their entire meditation library. Headspace.com slash blonde.

We talk pretty openly about gut health here on the podcast. I have been transparent about my own issues in the past, and I've had so many incredible experts on the show to talk about the importance of gut health and how it affects so many other functions in our body. So I don't have to tell you guys how important it is, but it really is all interconnected. your gut microbiome is an ecosystem of good and bad bacteria living in your belly. It impacts your

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Hi, I'm Claire Mazur. And I'm Erica Serulo. We're the co-host of a podcast called a thing or two. It comes out every Monday and the basic premise is this. We share all the stuff we think more people should know about. So that's apps, recipes, books, the nationwide Hagen-Daz vanilla bean shortage that nobody else was talking about. No one. No one. Our preferred vacuum brands of which we have multiples and critical explorations of our unique approaches to paper towel usage. Listen, we think you're going to like it. A lot of people do. And who's to say you'll be any different? Listen and subscribe wherever it is, you listen and subscribe to podcasts. So I know that you are, you're not an MD, you're a PhD and you really look at the behavior aspect of this.

But just so that people who are listening can understand, I'm sure everybody understands the concept that, yes, sleep affects everything, mood, you know, hormones, weight, appetite, so many different things. Physical and mental wellness, I guess I would say. But what is actually happening during sleep? aside from getting rest, I think everyone just thinks, oh, you need eight hours so you feel rested. That's it. What are some of the things that are happening that aren't as obvious as that? So it's a great question because so many people think sleep is a waste of time, right? And I'll sleep when I'm dead.

Not a lot happens. There's actually more that happens while we sleep than while we are awake. So some of those things that happen while we sleep, the first thing I always talk about during the pandemic is our immune system because that is so important. So our immune system gets stronger while we sleep. Our body and our brain actually releases toxins that make us sick and that happens during the sleeping process. So we wake up stronger, less likely to get sick, which is so important now.

It also, we're less likely to get diseases like cancer and Alzheimer's, again, because we're flushing out toxins. So that's one of the most important things that happens while we sleep. Another thing, you know, you said you're like discombobulatory. when you don't sleep well and you can't remember. So memory consolidation and organization takes place while we sleep. So everything that we learn during the day, from kids in school to adults, everything that we do during the day goes from short-term memory to long-term memory while we sleep.

So in order for you to remember what you have to do the next day and, you know, know where things are and just be organized that happens while we sleep and to remember for kids, for kids, what they learned in school stays in our mind. So that's another thing that happens. Hormones, you talked about hormones. So many hormones was decreed while we sleep. So the hunger hormone, which is why sleep is so often tied to eating and weight gain and diabetes and obesity. So there is a hunger hormone called leptin.

And leptin is the hormone that signals the brain to tell the body that we're full. And so if we don't get that signal, we can just keep eating because we don't know that we should be done. That's me. If I'm sick deprived. You know when you're sleep deprived, you're always craving. Like, you're not going to eat a salad today. Yeah. You want chips and greasy food because our body is so depleted of energy, it's looking for these outside sources.

Mm-hmm. And so we go to unhealthy foods, high-caloric foods. And then on top of that, we're in the leptin, we're, the leptin, we're, don't have enough leptin, so it's not telling our body to stop eating. So we're overeating those foods, hence the weight gain. So that's another important thing that happens. The growth hormone is to create it while we sleep. So for kids, it's important. If you remember when you're a little, maybe you've got growing pains in your legs while you're sleeping, our body grows, our muscles grow while we sleep, our brain grows while we sleep. We want our cortisol levels low. When we're

sleep deprived, our cortisol levels are up. So again, like on and on and on. So many important things happen. We sleep that we needed to feel good the next day. There are a few interesting things in there. Something about you were talking about the memory. And I remember hearing when I was in school that it was good to study before you slept or to like review your notes right before you went to sleep. And I actually did this last year.

I decided to go back to school for a short amount of time. And then I decided not to. But I hadn't been in school for so long. And I was learning how to study again. And I noticed that if I just reviewed my notes for the day, just for five minutes, just read things, I would remember them in the morning, which was so interesting. Yeah. It's a big thing for students, especially college students, that pull all-nighters and something

that I really like to stress to them is, or even for adults that are working that maybe have a big presentation the next day. You're better off, like, reading it before, for sure, the thing, getting a good night of sleep because it needs to go from short-term memory to long-term memory or otherwise you're wasting your time. So the kids that do the best in school and for workers and organizations that perform the best are going to be the ones that sleep the longest. It's so funny because it is kind of counterintuitive to what we have been taught and to what we kind of think. It's like, oh, well, you have to study all night so that you can cram all the information in so that you can do well. And

or so that you can do well in this presentation for work or be prepared or whatever. But it really, it kind of feels like a thread where if you just, if you do that, you're pulling on the thread and the whole thing unravels where you think that you're doing kind of opposite. Right. And also, like you said, not only the memory, but having to get up and do, you know, I do tons of public speaking to so many people. You don't want to be anxious the next day. You don't want to overeat and have a stomach ache.

You want to be on. Like you said, you're just off, right? Same thing on eight hours sleep or two. So seven, it happens and I'll get by. But then less than seven, you're not on. Yeah. So not only do you need to remember it, you need to be composed and feel good and it shows. Yeah.

Yeah. I have a personal question. I'm just going to hijack this interview for a second. But I'm sure some people listening experience this, where if I get, say, less than seven hours, I get so anxious. this never used to happen to me until the last few years. Just kind of like a physiological response where it's like I'm not necessarily even anxious about anything in my head.

In fact, I could be on vacation and get less than seven hours, but still have this like kind of fight or flight feeling. Do you know where that is? Yeah, that's your parasympathetic nervous system to be, you know, technical about it. But so there's a physiological reason why we're going to get more anxious when we're not sleeping. But also, you're going to feel like we talked about disorganized. So you might forget things, which is going to make you more anxious.

You get cranky. So maybe you're going to be fighting with your significant other or your spouse or your kids. So it's an emotional reaction. And we know when we're feeling tired and exhausted and cranky, you're not going to get along well with others. You're not going to feel good. You're going to overeat, which is going to make you anxious.

It's like a snowball effect. Yeah. Okay, so you mentioned kids earlier. What are some of the other main obstacles that you see that people experience when it comes to sleep? Probably, and this wouldn't be a surprise. The biggest detriment is using our phones and electronics before that. And there's two reasons. I mean, one again, a scientific reason why there's blue light that's emitted from our phones.

Our iPads are computers that goes into our eyes, tricks our brain into thinking. it's daytime and our body decreases the production of melatonin. And I always say before melatonin supplements became popular, people wouldn't know what melatonin is. Now I don't have to explain it because so many people are popping melatonin pills and eating melatonin gullit. So everybody knows that's the sleep hormone that we need to feel sleeping at night. So if you're going to use electronics and they're right in front of your eyes, that's one component. But the other component of electronics is why we're all addicted to our phones. social media, right? It causes us a dopamine response where we get addicted because those likes,

those dings, everything that comes from your phone makes you not want to put it down. So when you're on your phone, whether it's doom scrolling during the pandemic or, you know, watching something on YouTube, binging on Netflix, whatever it is, you're going to have some sort of emotional response. That's why we're on our phones all the time. So talking about a physiological response, meaning less melatonin, plus a neurological response of something happy or something sad is not conducive to falling asleep at night. So I'd say electronics before bed are the number one problem and when you wake up at night. So I always ask people, what is the first thing you do when you can't sleep at night at 2 o'clock in the morning when you wake up? You check your phone. I actually have good sleep hygiene

just because I love it and I need it. And I've realized that. So I get off my phone two hours before bed. I read with like a little amber reading light. So I turn off the other lights and I just, it helps me get naturally tired. My issue is if I am really stressed about things, I'll wake up super early like, but like 4.30 a.m. where it's so early, but like too late for me to really be able to fall back asleep. But if I do wake up at two, you know, one, two in the morning, which happens like very, very rarely. Something that my husband, does that he kind of taught me to do is to go somewhere else, like get out of bed, go somewhere else with a book and read. Because if you're just laying in bed, you're going to get the anxiety about, oh my God, I can't fall back asleep and I have this thing that I have to do in the morning and if you sit there and bed on your phone, like it's just over. But if you can go somewhere else, I don't know, I just find that. He gave you great advice. Yes, that is absolutely what you're supposed to do. So there's actually in CBTI, which is cognitive behavioral therapy for insomnia, there's something called the 30-30 rule. So after you're laying in bed for 30 minutes,

basically trying to will yourself back to sleep, once you start trying to will yourself to sleep, never going to happen. So the advice is, just what your husband said, get out of bed. I call it a sleep oasis. So everybody should make themselves before they go to bed, either in their room, if they don't have another room to go to or some other place that they consider their sleep oasis, their sleep paradise, and have it ready just in case you wake up at night. So maybe have some lavender spray, if you like that, a good book, a weighted lap blanket, soothing music. And if you can fall asleep after about 30 minutes or so, you know you have this place to go

that's going to be waiting for you. That's so relaxing. do something like reading, yoga breaths, stretches, and after another about half hour, once you feel like you're relaxed and your mind is calm, get back into bed and try to go back to sleep. The worst experience that I've had with sleep, which I've talked about a lot recently on this show

for one reason or another, was actually over the summer we went to Greece. And I didn't sleep on the way there. And just the way that the timing worked out when we got there, I had kind of been up for like a day and a half. And I tried to go to sleep that first night. And it was just, I was wide awake. And it's one in the morning, two in the morning, three in the morning. And then I'm panicking that, oh my God, I'm going to have been up for like two and a half days. I'm like losing it. So then I'm putting on the sleep meditations on my phone, which is making it infinitely worse,

because then I'm just thinking about, you know, the fact that I'm not sleeping. And okay, I did this one hour meditation and I'm still laying here wide awake. And that anxiety is so, I don't know, it's like so insidious. And that kind of stayed with me for a few days like, oh my God, is it going to happen again tonight? So I can only imagine how people with real insomnia feel. So how do you recommend somebody if they have that like anxious loop? Like they want to do the things, but they get so nervous that they're not going to be able to sleep. Do you have any tips for that? Yeah. So I mean, that's, you know, the fear of the fear. Yeah.

Right. So once you, you know, it's kind of like panic attacks. Like once you have it once and the next time you go to that place, you think you're going to have a panic attack again. Maybe you wouldn't have, but you bring it upon yourself. So that sleep anxiety, the fear of not being able to go to sleep can be overwhelming, which is why it's so important to do so many things during your day that make it conducive to falling asleep at night.

You don't want to set yourself up for failure. by, you know, having late coffee. So let's say late in the afternoon, you're exhausted because you didn't sleep the night before. So you have, you know, that cup of coffee, I don't recommend doing that. I'd rather you be exhausted in the afternoon and try to go to bed at a reasonable time. Or a lot of people choose alcohol before bed. They think that's going to relax them. It's actually a depressant and very bad for sleep.

Or maybe they'll say, oh, if I work out, that'll give me the energy to get through the afternoon, you know, the late day. and then I will sleep better at night. You don't want to work out right before bed. So there are so many things to do during the day leading up until sleep that can make it more conducive. And then the last thing, most importantly, is to not, what you did when you were away in Greece, is to just kind of go with it and not freak yourself out about it. It's okay.

You will survive. You know, it takes a very long time to feel the repercussions of sleep deprivation. So it's worth it to feel. put in the effort, but a couple of days when you're away, it's not going to make a big difference. And what eventually made you fall asleep? I took Benadryl. You did that to get your cycle. You had to break that cycle, right?

And your circadian rhythm back on track. Yeah. I mean, it was like five in the morning and I'm poking my husband, who's fast asleep, of course, two seconds after he closes his eyes. And I was like, I think I need to go to the ER. Like, I was losing it. And he's like, what do you want to be? sedated, he goes, go take a Benadryl. And I was like, Benadryl, that's not going to do anything for me.

He's like, just take it. Sure enough, 20 minutes later, I was out. And after a couple nights, I did, you know, even out, and then I was fine for the rest of the trip. Sometimes you have to break your cycle. The thing with Benadryl is for some people who sedate them, other people that makes them hyper. So it's kind of, you know, before you go into that, I had it had the opposite effect and you that would have made your situation worse. But I'm glad you. Yeah. Since we're talking about sleep in this episode, we may as well talk about what else is going down in the bedroom, and that is sex. So hopefully you guys all listened to my episode back in December with Shan Booty. She had so many amazing tips for keeping things spicy in the bedroom, whether it's with a long-term partner, somebody new, with yourself. It doesn't really matter. So I wanted to give you guys one of my own tips, and that is, incorporating foria. So foria are all natural, organic, plant-based sexual intimacy products. They have a

serious cult following with tens of thousands of people who have had their sex lives transformed through using their products. And I really love the Awaken Arousal oil. So Awaken is like a juicy warm up that helps you get really turned on. It helps to increase your pleasure and deepen your orgasm with a partner or solo. It uses CBD and warming, sensation-inducing organic botanicals that enhance arousal, sensitivity, pleasure, access to orgasm, and help with any discomfort. And you can pair this together with their sex oil, which is also amazing. It's such a good combo for peak pleasure. So I fully endorse you go ahead and treat yourself to more deeper, fuller pleasure, wherever you can find it as often as possible. And you can start with a bottle of

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it is, I will tell you. So one delicious scoop of athletic greens contains 75 high-quality, vitamins, minerals, whole food sourced superfoods, probiotics, and adaptogens that are easily absorbable by your body to help you start your day right. This blend of ingredients helps to support your gut health, your nervous system, your immune system, your energy, recovery, focus, and aging. So pretty much all of the things. And the reason that I like this over traditional juice is that it just has so much more packed into it. And also, so many, even just green juices, have a ton of sugar and they lose a lot of their beneficial properties. They lose their fiber. So I find that this really packs a punch into just a tiny

little scoop. And the way that I do it is I do it on an empty stomach first thing in the morning. I like to add a couple ice cubes. Just shake it up. And I've really come to crave it. So the backstory of athletic greens is actually really interesting. It was created when the founder experienced a ton of gut health issues and ended up on a super complicated supplement routine to recover, which cost him $100 a day. So he created athletic greens after experiencing how difficult it was to create an optimal nutrition routine on your own. And to that point about the price, with athletic greens, it costs you less than $3 a day. And you're investing in your health, and it's pretty much cheaper than any juice would be. It's cheaper than your coffee. And it's

definitely cheaper than getting all the different supplements that it contains within one scoop by yourself. So right now, it's time to reclaim your health and arm your immune system with convenient daily nutrition, especially heading into the flu and cold season. And to make it really easy, Athletic Greens is going to give you a free one-year supply of immune supporting vitamin D and five free travel packs with your first purchase. All you have to do is visit athletic greens.com slash blonde files. Again, that is athletic greens.com slash blonde files to take ownership over your health and pick up the ultimate daily nutritional insurance. I'm actually curious, like about medication, so I know that you're not like we said before, you're not an MD. But how do medications,

whether it's something kind of more on the, you know, more natural end like melatonin, up to say, Ambien or whatever else is in that class of drugs, how does that? that affect sleep? Because I think so many people just feel like, oh, I take my Ambien and I got eight hours. And is that really restorative? Or is it kind of a Band-Aid or somewhere in between? Yeah, I don't recommend sleep medications like Ambien. They're dangerous and they're addictive. And you're not, you're putting a Band-Aid on the problem. Like you said, you're not learning how to sleep well. But then there are things like melatonin supplements. And so I could took a very long time about melatonin during the pandemic actually wound up over 200%.

And I think that the good news is that there's no research that shows melatonin is harmful at all. So that's fine. If anybody listens to this is taking it. There's a lot of things people don't know about melatonin. So the first thing is because people think, oh, it's just like, you know, a gummy of vitamin because it's not FDA regulated. But there's a problem with it not being FDA regulated is that they found. when they did some studies, they found there's actually 10 times more melatonin in some of the supplements than it says on the label.

So you have to be careful with that. Number two, a lot of them starting at 5 to 10 milligrams. You should start at 0.5 or 1 milligram and see if it works. So why would you start at such a high dosage when you can start low? But people don't realize that. When you get to a high dosage, also there's generally not many side effects for melatonin, but higher dosages can cause very vivid dreams and nightmares. A lot of my clients have said that.

Also, a stomach ache and a headache the next day. So I know a lot of parents give their kids melatonin, like little ones that maybe can't even say it, you know, that they don't feel well from it. So there's just certain things that you have to be careful with. But the good news is it's not addictive. And there's no research to show any short-term effects. It really hasn't been studied long-term yet. So I wouldn't say any kind of medication, be it a supplement or a more intensive prescription medication, you should always try to use that to regulate your sleep.

It's like you said, if you were in Greece and your circadian rhythm is totally messed up. Or you know, you're a night shift worker and you're going back to working regular hours and you need to get back on track. Or at the beginning of the pandemic when everybody was like updeme scrolling all night and all and we're home in lockdown and you need something. But once you get your circadian rhythm, your sleep wake cycle back on track, you need to just try natural weeds to get to sleep. And like I said, there's so many things you can do, which is the good news. What are some other things that people can do throughout the day? So you mentioned like maybe not having that afternoon coffee, not doing a

nighttime workout. What are things that people can do throughout the day that they might not know that will support a better night's sleep. Yeah. So first thing, I mean, starting like right when you wake up is to immediately open your window, your blinds in your room, get natural sunlight. I live in New York now. You're in L.A. so you can get up and out, which is great, freezing here, but even still get some good

fresh air and some sunlight is a great way to reset your circadian rhythm. Again, your sleep wake cycle. Our melatonin production is guided by. our body temperature and light and dark. So that's why you want to sleep in a very dark room at night. But when you wake up and you don't want your melatonin production high, you want to get immediate light. And throughout the day, just getting, you know,

exercise every so often or breathing fresh air, doing some yoga stretches during the day just to get the blood circulating is a good thing. And then after lunch, the rules are skip the caffeine, if you can. For naps, I'm definitely pro nap. So if you don't sleep well at night and you just can't get through the next day, naps are a good way to give you a little bit of energy. There's a couple of rules that you need to follow. Like I know a lot of teenagers will start to take a nap at like four or five.

Not a good idea because that again will then mess up your sleep for the night and then you get, you know, into that cycle of your sleep wake cycle being all messed up. So trying to nap between one and three and only nap for 20 minutes, 30 minutes max. so you don't wake up and you don't have to fall asleep and you kind of like laying on the couch. I'm going to close my house for a few minutes and you sleep for an hour and you feel worse when you wake up. You have that like groggy, nauseous feeling and you go, I felt better before I nap. That's because you started cycling into your deep sleep cycle. We don't want to do that. So we just want to get a little boost of energy to make it through the day. So earlier in the day and a brief nap is a good thing to do.

Get your workout in early too and stop the caffeine and the alcohol and the heavy foods too. that's a big thing with eating before bed is not a really good idea. So we were talking earlier about how we're both kind of eight-hour people. There are people who say like, I mean, I have friends who are like, no, I feel my best with six hours. I don't feel well with eight hours. And then there are some people who need nine. So if somebody does fall short of the eight hours, should they strive for that? Or does everybody kind of have a little bit of a different goal?

Yeah. So adults need on average. between seven and nine. That's what I would say, you know, there's like 99% of us that would fall into that category of that. But that's a pretty big difference, right? Seven to nine, that's a difference of two hours.

So five hours or less, you're definitely going to consecutively, it's sleep deprivation is cumulative. You're going to feel the effects. The reason why, and I run into that too with friends, and people I need, I talk about sleep personally and professionally

every single day in my life. And there are so many people that say to me, I don't need a lot of sleep. I never did. Your body just gets used to it. So you think you don't because that becomes your new normal. So you almost forget how much better you functioned with more sleep. So 1% of the population are short sleepers.

That can function at their best on less than that. But 99% can't. So there's a good chance most of your friends, my friends, people we know, need somewhere between 7 and 9. My advice is, you and I said we're eight hours sleepers. I know that for a fact because you can spend a week of your life testing it out to see. So if you can find a week where you don't have to wake up at a certain amount of time, and you can commit to go into bed about the same time every night. I suggest you do that and you don't send an alarm and see when your body naturally wakes up.

And after a week, you will see when you wake up naturally without an alarm and you feel your best. And that's how you'll know whether you're a seven, eight or nine hours sleeper. And then you can plan a court in a way. So what you don't want to do, kind of like what your husband said, you don't want to lay there and try to go to sleep when you can. You don't want to think, oh, I need nine hours. And then lay in bed for two hours, not being able to fall asleep because it's not the right time for you. You're going to start a bad cycle that way too.

So it's really good to get an idea of whether you're a seven, eight, or nine hours sleeper or somewhere in between. And then make sure you're trying to get to bed about the three. right time every night. What about kind of the other end of it? What about for people who have trouble waking up? I have a lot of people who message me because I'm a morning person and everyone wants to know the morning routine and I'm like, I wake up at 6 or 630. That's like what my body does and I have energy and, you know, whatever. But I know a lot of people and I know that I'm sure there are people listening who are like, that's great for you. Like congratulations. But I cannot wake up in the morning, even if they get sleep. So do you have tips for people who struggle with that?

So it's actually interesting. What people have asked me, is it more important? Because I say, you're supposed to go to sleep and to wake up about the same time every day, even on weekends. I don't know if you do that because you're such a good sleeper. Tamsa are probably are not sleeping until noon on the weekends because that would mess up your sleep during the week. So I say try to go to sleep within an hour every single day and wake up about the same time, which is hard for some people to do. People will say to me, well, if I had to choose, if you had to choose, which is more important, going to sleep the same time every day or waking up the same time every day? I would say waking up the same time every day is more important.

So the people that are having a hard time waking up, my guess, and of course I don't know them, is that they probably don't have a very consistent sleep wake cycle. And so if they can, even after a bad night of sleep, if they can force themselves to get up in the morning and get on with their day. and then get to bed at the same time, that should kind of try to even out for them. And as long as they're getting the amount of sleep they need, they should be able to wake up when they need to.

Now, having said that, sometimes people think that they're getting quality sleep and they're not. And that's why they're having a hard time waking up in the morning. So maybe for those people doing a sleep study or wearing a sleep tracker to kind of let them see that maybe there's an issue like an apnea or something where they think they're sleeping,

but they're being woken up a lot at night, and that's why they're having a hard time waking up in the morning. Yeah, that was another question that I wanted to ask you. I recently started wearing an aura ring. I had a Fitbit and then an aura ring because a trainer that I'm working with, actually he has like five pillars for health. And he's like, I want to see your movement. I want to see your sleep because, you know,

like we're talking about, that's the foundation of it. At first I was a little hesitant because I'm like, well, then I feel like I'm going to be thinking about it a lot. And I know that there is room for error and there's some deviation even between the two. Like if I wear the two both at the same time at night. But how accurate do you think they are and are they helpful? So I personally don't have one. I don't, you know, I sleep well.

So I don't find that I need to wear one personally. But I have been doing some research on it because they're not, a lot of them are not all that accurate. But the number one, most accurate one is the aurora. So I'm glad that's the one that you're wearing. research has shown. So again, it's good if you're having some sleep issues or like you said, somebody who's waking up and people say, I sleep great. I'm never feeling well rested during the day. It could be very helpful for them. Excellent for athletes. I'm the parent of an athlete. And he knows how important sleep is. I talk to athletic teams all the time. So it's really important if they're not

sleeping well or not prioritizing sleep. That could be great for them to do. And all, Also, for anybody that maybe thinks that they're not sleeping so well, can find out that they're actually sleeping better than they are. Because it's interesting that a lot of people overestimate how badly they're sleeping, but actually getting more sleep than they thought, which could actually lower their anxiety. So there's some really good benefits to using those sleep trackers like the aurorid, but like that when that is more accurate than some of them that aren't. the only negative would be if you become too obsessed with it.

You don't want it to be. I border when I'm doing my sleep education or being a sleep motivator or a sleep influencer. I want to stress how important sleep is. It's the most important thing in my life personally and professionally. And I want to stress that to people, but I don't want to stress them out. Right. There's that balance between making it a priority and knowing how important it should be on your list of priorities, what I call this priority hierarchy,

everybody's, you know, a priority hierarchy is to be successful in work, in school, socially, and our relationships and our marriages to be less anxious, to be organized. And a lot of people don't have sleep as a priority. So it's not to stress out and to freak out when you don't sleep. And make it a consistent priority in your life. So you know you can turn down. down, you know, certain things like a late night dinner with friends and maybe eat earlier

and then just meet them for a snack because you know it's going to affect your sleep at night, those things, you know. And then, of course, every once in a while, I saw the story just recently. I went to my college reunion in New Orleans. I went to Tilling University. You don't get a lot of sleep there. People have a few specialists doing that. Of course, you throw a question to the wind and have a great time.

When you get home, no, you know that Sunday night I didn't sleep so great. My circadian rhythm was messed up. And then you're committed and you can get it back on track. Once you learn how to sleep well, you can always fix it. So you have to live life and have fun, but always keep it as a priority too. Right. If somebody is tracking, what is the goal or the range that somebody should fall into for like, I know the aura ring breaks it down into light, REM and deep sleep?

Are there, you know, is it like an hour of REM, an hour of deep and the rest of light? It changes throughout the night. So your REM sleep gets longer as you get later into the morning. So if you wake up in the middle of the night to remember your dream, you most likely won't. But your REM sleep is longer, which is mostly why we'll wake up in the morning and remember our dreams. So sleep cycles are 90 minutes in total with our REM sleep getting longer as the night goes on. Mm-hmm. Rem is always the one that I'm a little bit low on. So I actually have like competitions with my friend over this now who also has an aura ring. We're like, who can get the lower heart rate and more REM and deep sleep. I had two and hours. I talk about sleep too. That's like I always say sleep is like it's the therapist because it helps us with our anxiety and depression. It's a physical trainer because it helps us with our, you know, our ability to exercise and to eat. It's like the tutor for academics because we're,

we do better in school, it really works to serve all these different purposes. And there's a lot of people outside of the sleep world to have jobs that can be made better with them promoting sleep too. Yeah. Yeah. What is what is one thing that you think people should stop doing or that you wished people would stop doing when it came to sleep? And one thing that people could start doing today to support their sleep. Well, it's a good question. So, okay, this is a very hot topic. No, I'm intended. Everybody has to make their bedrooms cooler. So many years ago, I started following the rule of your bedroom being between 60 and 68 degrees. Now, I have to say, people who know me know, I'm always cold during the day. So my home, I keep it 72 degrees during the day, which is

mostly too hot for people. So it's not as if I'm that person that always has the windows open. But when I go to sleep at night, I freeze everyone out. And I know. never wake up in the middle of the night overheated. And so many people tell me, especially women, paramedopause and menopausal women will say that they're waking up with these hot flashes throughout the night. Most people sleep with their rooms too cold. And couples and husbands love this advice that I did because that's often a point of contention between couples, man wants the room cold and the women once and hotter, that you really need

to have a really cool room in order to sleep well. So that's kind of a big mistake that a lot of people make and don't realize. I never wake up cold. And it's good. You get into bed and you're like all snugly. You can wear layers. And then if you get hot, just take off the layers.

But if your room's too hot, once you're naked, you know, there's nothing else to the way they're sweating. So, well, this is my dream. I mean,

I love it to be cold and I like to have heavy blankets and feel like cocooned in there. It's actually the opposite, though. My husband runs cold. He's most comfortable if it's like 78 degrees.

I mean, obviously that never happens. But at night, it's usually like 72, 74 even sometimes. For me? Yeah. Yeah, it's brutal. I wake up hot all the time. So what do you recommend for?

Like that, specifically me. So there's a term called a sleep divorce. I don't really like it, but that's what... Sounds harsh. That's what it's quite really. Again, the prioritizes. You're together. at night, in bed, whatever you're doing, watching your TV, being intimate.

Once you're ready to turn over and go to sleep, if a couple doesn't sleep, doesn't mesh, right? One likes a stiff mattress, one lights, a soft mattress, the room temperature, dark lights with the TV on, or maybe you're on two totally different schedules. Somebody likes to go to bed early. They have to get up early for it. The other person's a night owl. all you're going to do, one person's going to sleep badly. One person's going to win with the sleep environment,

and the other person's going to be resentment. And then the next day is going to be resentment. And you're going to be exhausted because somebody's not sleeping well. And that doesn't do well for her marriage or for our relationship. So be together until your eyes are about to close and then maybe sleep into going to your own bed for the night. If you just can't agree to it because really, again, what's your priority? sleep is so important. It affects everything that we do. You don't want to have so many of my friends who say, you know, their husbands keep them up all night's flooring. How can you not be resentful of

that the next day? You're physically exhausted. We need to eat to sleep and to breathe in order to live. It's a basic biological need. If you're not getting it, you're not going to function well. And if you're not getting it because of the person that's laying next to you, that's a problem. So there's actually some high-end home developers now, builders, that are building homes with two masters. Really? Yeah, just for that reason. That's a good idea. That's so funny.

Okay, so was your thing for people to stop doing, stop sleeping with it warm, or was the thing to start sleeping with it cold? Well, yeah, I guess. I mean, the things to stop doing, well, something else you could start doing. Another thing, tip, that's kind of not a. a comment tip of the people here. Another tip is to shower before bed. That's something that I love to do. That's really helpful.

We want to, again, that our melatonin production increase, and a way to do that is to decrease our body temperature. So that's also another reason why we don't want to work out right before bed because that increases our body temperature. So if you get into a hot shower, your body temperature goes up, but then drops immediately when you get out of the shower. And that signals to the body to increase melatonin production. So not only is it often relaxing,

and soothing and you can clear your minds, but it also helps physiologically with the ability to fall asleep. So you can shower before bed and then stop sleeping in a hot room, making it cold at night and having a very consistent bedtime routine is really important too. So after the shower, I don't know what, do you do something every night before you get into bed? Yeah, so I get off my phone by like seven. I put it in another room. I usually take a bubble bath or I shower. I do my skincare. I'll have some chamomile tea sometimes, but not like too close to bed, obviously. And then I usually get in bed by like 8 or 8.30. I don't really watch TV.

I did the last few days nonstop because I was sick. But usually I am in bed by 8 or 8.30 and I read and I turn off all the lights and I just have that little amber reading light. And then I fall asleep by like 9.30. Okay. I need you. I need you like on tour with me. I don't know.

Because you are perfected. What I talk about with sleep. That's perfect and amazing. Thank you. Well. Because you're a good sleeper. Yeah. I really value it.

I got sober eight years ago. And prior to that, I would be up for days, you know, or go to bed at six in the morning and then get up at nine. And I just, when I got sober,

it was like, my body was like, thank you. And it just was like, I just don't have the tolerance really to not sleep well anymore. I think I burned through all of that when I was younger. But also, my body wakes me up so early, regardless of if I go to bed at two or if I go to bed at nine. So the only way that I can

really control it is by going to bed earlier. And luckily, I usually don't have any issue falling asleep as long as I do all of those things. And then throughout the day, also, I have one cup of matcha in the morning. That's it for caffeine. And I eat dinner at like 5.30 or six. So it's like, I just have found what really works for me. Yeah. Like you know, you're great because you know what works and you prioritize it and it fits into your life. So unfortunately, some people, they have to work at night. They can't do this or, you know, whatever it is, things in life, you know, people are sharing a small home and everybody is up late when they want to I would have an ideal environment, but you're taking advantage of that by doing all the right

things. So, like, who knows to you? You're great. You don't need me. That's exactly what I recommend is every single night, you have this routine, and you're probably like me. So I have that routine, too. You can't wait. Like, you start to stay to me. It's so exciting getting ready to go. Yeah. It feels so good. And because you don't have trouble fall in sleep, it's not a stressful time for you. But think about the people who have trouble falling asleep or parents whose kids don't sleep. And when that, you know, as it starts to get dark, the anxiety starts to go up because they know it's going to be a disaster. So it takes a lot to get to people to where you are, to where I am. But the first step is really just making it a priority. You want to be

where you are now. Well, of course, you have life experiences that led you to this. You now know how great it feels. It's so well and you want to be doing that, which is great and you prioritize it, but that's the first step. So you prioritize it. Then you have the routine. You do all those things before bed because you know it's going to help you fall asleep. And if you can't fall asleep or you wake up in the middle of the night, you have to have tools and tricks to get yourself back to some. And those are really the keys to it all. Well, I think this is going to help so many people. And I just love talking to where can everybody find you and find out more information on what you do?

So my website is solve our sleep.com. They can find me on Instagram at Solvarsleep. Feel free to reach out, email me, message me. Like I said, I'm talking about sleep every single day to all ages, everywhere, every population, and everybody, just know it's never too late. No matter what age you are to learn good sleep habits. We sleep every single day of our life. So just think about that priority hierarchy.

what's important to you and just know that you're not going to be successful in all those things that you prioritize if you don't put sleep on that list and move it up to the top. It will make reaching all your other goals in 2022 more realistic if you just get healthy sleep. I love that. So true. Well, thank you so much for coming on. Thank you, Ariel. Thanks for having me. I hope you enjoyed that episode. If you liked it, and if you like the show in general. Please take a second to rate, review, and subscribe. It goes a long way, and it's actually the best way to support the show. Also, if you want to see more about each episode, you can head over to The Blonde Files podcast on Instagram. I'm always posting about each episode

there or over on my personal page at Ariel Laurie.