Well with Arielle Lorre - 341: My Friend Interviews Me! Beauty, Relationships, Wellness and More

Episode Date: August 14, 2024

I’m in the hot seat in this reverse interview where my friend Daniela interviews me (using listener questions). I share advice for my younger self, how to meet men, whether I have a “type’, how I deal with online judgment, navigating all of the wellness information from my guests, what I won’t eat for health reasons, how friends and family feel about cosmetic work and more. This is such a fun conversation with lots of laughs and revealing info!Subscribe to Patreon for exclusive weekly content: patreon.com/ArielleLorreThis episode may contain paid endorsements and advertisements for products and services. Individuals on the show may have a direct, or indirect financial interest in products, or services referred to in this episode.Visit Cora.Life/BLONDE and use BLONDE for 20% off.Visit article.com/BLONDE for $50 off your first purchase of $100 or more. Go to hungryroot.com/blonde for 40% off your first delivery and free veggies for life!Visit kajabi.com/blonde for a free 30-day trial to start your business.Sign up at ro.co/BLONDE to pay $99 for your first month—and $145 a month after thatDiscover your perfect shade of Weightless Skin Foundation at BobbiBrown.comProduced by Dear MediaSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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rise-adviseur or Sunnycars. The following podcast is a dear media production. Welcome to the Blond Files podcast. I'm your host, Ariel Lori, and I'm here to talk all things wellness. From how to achieve optimal health and well-being to the best beauty tips and everything in between, no topic is off limits. I know there's so much information out there, so I'm bringing on expert guests and sharing my

own experiences to help you sift through all the wellness stuff without the BS. Enjoy the show. Hi, everybody. Welcome to the show. Nailed it. This is not a familiar voice. I am taking over the hot seat and I'm giving it to Ariel. I am going to interview my dear friend. We asked you guys both separately for questions. If you see me in the office, you ask me all the time. What are Ariel's secrets? What does she do for that skin?

I've asked her and she's going to answer. Hi. Are you ready? Not really. Not really. These are good. I'm nervous. You should be.

I know. I'm dying to know how many of these actually. know the answers to, I think a lot. Yeah, I might throw it back at you and put you in the hot seat, test you. You know me so well, though. So well. All right, let's go. All right. Advice for your 25-year-old self. You know, I get asked this question a lot. What would I tell my younger self? And I feel like for me, it's a little bit unique because everything prior to 28 was almost like it was a different life. So everybody listening for the most part probably knows that I got sober at 28. I was deep in the throes of addiction from about 17, 18 until 28.

So, you know, I don't feel like I have a lot of wisdom to impart to my 25-year-old self because my 25-year-old self just needed to do a few things. I had to put down the alcohol, put down the blow, put down the pills, and find my way to sobriety. And, you know, when I think back to that time, I had so many people giving me advice because my life was so unmanageable. I couldn't hold down a job. I couldn't stay in school. I couldn't hold down friendships. I had no purpose, no meaning in my life other than to party. And from my family to other people in my life, to counselors, to the very wise, smart people at all of the rehabs that I would end up in every couple years, they all tried to impart some wisdom, some advice. And I just, I couldn't hear it, you know. So I think for me it was really about getting sober, but what was beneath all of that drinking,

drug use, all of that was this really heavy fear, I think, of being my authentic self. And I've talked about this a lot. A lot of my drinking and using was to like put up these facades of who I thought I was supposed to be and who I thought other people wanted me to be. And so a big part of getting sober was like peeling those layers back and being my authentic self, whatever that meant. So I think that if there's like one thing that I could take away aside from getting sober, which was like the glaring issue, it would be to not be afraid to be myself, whatever that looked like. I love that. And I think that's such great wisdom to someone who's 25, you know, because I think it takes a long time to be comfortable enough to be your authentic self. So I think the earlier that

you learn that, the better. Thanks. All right. Are you afraid of turning 40? next year. Oh, you know, I think I talked about this either on Patreon or my solo episode last week. I don't remember which one it was. I think it was solo. It was solo. Yeah. Not really. You know, if you had asked me five years ago, I would have said absolutely. And I won't get too into it because I did just talk about it. But I feel like from 34-ish to 38, there was a big fear of things changing. And, the number and the age. And 34 was like, oh my God, I'm turning 35. And then that means that I'm almost 40. And like there was this whole narrative in my head. And then 35 was big. 36, I felt like was the worst one because I was like, I am on the other side of 35. I am no longer. And I would like have all

of these stories that I would, you know, make up about the number. And then like 37. And when I turned 38, I was just like, this is happening. Right. And then of course, course in the past year, I had a lot of health issues and life things and everything. And I think that really changed my perspective about it. So now I feel like I'm really at a place of acceptance where, on the one hand, I'm grateful. I'm grateful for my health. I'm grateful to be functioning. I'm grateful to have a career that I love, friends, relationships, all of that. So like the age thing is just, you know, a number as cliche as it is. But that said, there are parts of aging, especially for women. that are daunting. And I'm sure that when I'm actually turning 40, ask me then, because I might be

totally spiraling. But I feel like 40s really are the new 30s. I mean, look at some of, you know, Kim Kardashian. I'm not saying everybody loves her, but she's what, 43, 44? I mean, she looks amazing. She's probably at the peak of her career in her life. And I think that this idea that like 40 is this big, scary thing is very outdated. My prediction, knowing you as well as I do, you're going to sail right through. You've never been happier. You've never looked better. I think you're going to sail. I don't think it's going to bother you at all. When I turn... I need lots of face tape. We'll get you. For your birthday. When I turned 30, I cried. I cried all day. John just kept like throwing presents at me. Just like, please stop crying. I don't know what. I was a mess. I was like, I haven't accomplished anything. I have nothing to show for. I felt very like, vaguely. I felt very, like, vacant. I feel like I hadn't really accomplished what I needed to. I don't even remember it. It was like, was fine. Totally fine. Yeah, I think 30 was so scary. There's something about going from 20s to 30s because 20s, especially for me, but I think for a lot of people, you're not really sure where you're going.

You're not really sure what you want to do. You're not really sure. People think that you have to have it figured out in your 20s. And I'm like, no. So going from 20s to 30s, I think 30s so far has been, have been incredible because that's when you are kind of finding your purpose and you just have more direction and more clarity, I think. Yes. But you don't know that. So going from 20s to 30s, that was huge for me as well. I remember I had a huge existential crisis at that time. You don't have to have to figure out. You guys both in your 20s? Yes. I have to go to work with these gorgeous girls every day. And I'm like, imagine comparing your skin to theirs. So like, you know, You don't have to have it figured out when you're 30.

Yeah. If anybody is listening, maybe that's advice for 25-year-olds or anybody in your 20s. You don't have to have it figured out. Totally. This is a good one. What's the biggest lesson you learned from your divorce? And it was a difficult time. And sometimes difficult times we can really learn a lot from and doesn't make them

easier. But is there something that you learned that you think would be helpful for somebody? Yeah. And I talked about this a little bit in the last solo episode. as well. There were a few really big things that I learned. One was that I'm way stronger and way more capable than I thought I was. It was extremely difficult to leave that relationship. One, because there was no glaring issue. You know, it wasn't like somebody cheated. We didn't hate each other. In fact, we loved each other. I think we loved each other more going through the process of

divorcing, maybe than we had in the years leading up to it. There was a new kind of love and appreciation, but it wasn't marriage kind of love. But there was companionship and there was comfort and then there was massive security. Leaving a lifestyle like that and security like that is, for me, nearly impossible. And I think I probably could have stayed, but it would have been at the expense of my emotional piece. You know, I experienced a lot of turmoil because I was like, my inner life is not reflected in my outer life, even though my outer life looks really good. And that, that kept me in it, I think, for a long time, trying to be careful of how I'm phrasing this. Because I want to respect him and, you know, not say anything hurtful. For sure. But that was

extremely difficult. And I think that a lot of people could probably understand that. And think, why would you even leave? Right. And you know, you know, that was very hard for me. And it was something that he and I both kind of deliberated over for years, you know, like we were separated in 2022. It wasn't just like a one and done thing. It was like separation, then get back together. We really tried to make it work. There wasn't an obvious answer. Like it was not black and white. It was very much a gray area. So there was a lot of fear about like, am I doing the right thing? What's going to happen if I leave. Am I ever going to meet anybody else? Like all the things that we tell ourselves, I'm not going to have that safety net of that material security, financial security,

all of that. And it turned out to be probably the most like confidence building thing I've ever done in my life, self-esteem, self-worth, maybe not in my life because I think sobriety has helped me a lot in that area as well. But taking that leap and having faith and then being able to be able to to like kind of catch myself on the other side of that. That was huge. And then, you know, also, I think the other big lesson would be like not confusing comfort with happiness. And that's something that I really talked about in the other episode as well. I think a lot of people get those confused or think because it's comfortable, it's good. Well, it's comfortable in some ways. And then that emotional turmoil kind of cancels all of that other comfort out because you can have

material comfort, you can have financial comfort, you can have companionship comfort, whatever the situation is. But if you're not having inner peace within yourself, none of it matters. That is exactly right. And I think that, you know, you were so courageous because a lot of people would be like, who cares? Just live in separate homes. You could have a, you could live in different. Yeah, it's better to be depressed on a private jet. Totally. No, it's not. It's not. Right. And I, you know, watched you. And so like, it's, it's very clear. that you wanted real companionship and real meaning. And I think that sometimes what we think is security or is, you know, companionship actually

really isn't because there were some times that, you know, you needed a little bit more and didn't necessarily get it. And I think that that's kind of where you said, okay, wait a second. I think that maybe I'm not seeing this clearly. I need to rethink things. And I think that's when you really got your courage. And look at, we look at where you are now. It's pretty incredible. Thanks. Good advice. Okay, advice for meeting men. You seem to have found

your boyfriend really fast. I don't know. Now this I want to know. Oh, please. You know everything. I don't have good advice when it comes to this because, yes, I did meet him very fast. In fact, we were introduced in 2022 when I was separated via text. We never met in person, but there was an introduction like, hey, you guys are both in the same place. We were in Miami at that time. you should hang out. This was by a mutual friend of both of ours. And I was, I think I responded, but I was just not trying to date. I was trying to make my marriage work. Right. At that time, so nothing came of it. We never met in person. And then we were reintroduced again two years later in that same place that we were two years prior. And this time I was in a different place.

So that was how I met him was through a mutual friend. So I didn't do it. So I didn't do it. any of the dating up stuff. I didn't go out to like bars or wherever people meet. I don't know. Cooking classes. Pottery. I don't fucking know. How do you know? Unless you have a mutual connection. Like how do you know what you see is really what's going on? Like people could reinvent themselves and like you wouldn't know. And do you remember in the beginning I was like, this is too good to be true. This person is like so many green flags. And I was like if it weren't for who introduced us, I would not believe that this is real. I would think that this is like a total front.

I'm being love bombed. Right. And so I think that having that mutual friend who advocates for that person is huge. So when it comes to meeting men, I don't know. I do feel like people are kind of moving away from the apps. And that's not to say they're bad. I know so many people who met on apps, but I feel like, especially like the younger generation are kind of over it. Right.

And they're trying to do more things to get out there and meet like. in the wild. Yes. And I mean, I just think like the more connections you have, the more opportunity there is to meet somebody, whether that's like meeting somebody as a friend and then they know somebody who knows somebody. I mean, I think that that's like a good way. And I want to circle back really quick because I think that watching you go through this, the thing that I think was really important to and knowing that he was the real deal is that he introduced you to his friends pretty quickly. And you got to meet his friends. And so you, you, knew kind of what he was telling you was true because he weren't isolated, right? And like,

you got to see these friends he's had for a very long time, how beloved he was or is by them. And I think that that would be a red flag is if you meet this guy online, there's no friends around. How do you, you know, corroborate the story? I think that that's a thing that I saw. I was like, oh, okay, this is legit because this guy is like. The first weekend that we met. Yeah, it was like a whole weekend with friends. But I all, I think that that's really important. when you are in the early stages of dating somebody because I think that if somebody has a lot of friends, or not even a lot of friends, meaningful relationships that they've had for a long time, that shows that that person takes the initiative to maintain that relationship. And I think that that's something that you want in a potential partner. So I think that's very important. I agree. Okay, this one's really good. It says, what is your type? And I, that was a question for you, right? And I, it's so funny because like, knowing, you know, I, there is no type. You could see our DMs back and forth if anyone were to get a hold of our phones.

Oh, God. There's no type. And I mean, you know, we all have periods where maybe we've lost our mind for a minute. Just don't make sense. So maybe there's a couple that didn't quite make sense, but like, I think when it comes down to it, your type, you really enjoy a nurturing relationship for sure. I think you really like someone who's calm. I see that you really thrive in someone who's grounded and calm and is supportive of you. And I think that your type is kind, supportive, grounded. And I think now more than ever being willing to do fun things. I think you're really wanting to go do things.

Like you're doing all this fun stuff that you've always wanted to do. When you put up your Pinterest board from last year and then you were at those places, I was literally dying. People were like, love you? Yeah, but it looks like you just both. a few trips and I was like, well, that is not really true. He booked all of them. That, that's real. We talked about this this time last year. If you've heard of Ozempic or Weigovee, which if you listen to this show, you have because I have had multiple experts on talking about it,

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So listen and subscribe on YouTube or wherever you get your podcast. So you never miss an episode. I think when it comes to my type. I think there are some patterns, but you know, you look at my ex and he doesn't fit into the type. And I don't mean like externally or anything like that, but just like the age and like a lot of things about him. But I think that another common denominator would be ambition and somebody having their own thing. Like I cannot be with somebody who is like smothering and doesn't have their own purpose and their own. and their own passion, I would say. I'm very attracted to that. That doesn't mean that they have to be like mega wealthy, anything like that, but just somebody who has their own thing going on in their life.

I'm very drawn to that. Yes. I totally agree with that. How do you deal with online judgment? Oh. Depends on the day. But for the most part, I, first of all, I don't even. look at it. I don't entertain it. I know that there are places where people vent their judgments,

and it's just I could not care less about any of that because I think it's such a waste of anybody's time who's engaging that way. But also, I can't control what people think of me and people's opinions of me. And when I think about it, really, I don't think that anybody who's ever had any kind of interaction with me in person, no matter how well they know me, would say anything bad about me. I know that I'm a good person. I try to be kind. Like, I know my intentions and how I live my life and what the people close to me, my friends, my family, but also like people more on the periphery or if I meet somebody out, you know, who follows me, people who work for me. Like they, I hope, Ashley, can you, yeah, okay. Thanks. I just wanted to make sure.

I think that they would all have positive things to say about me. So when it comes to online judgment, I think that there are so many things that contribute to that. It's more a reflection of the people who are judging than the person being judged. And, you know, that doesn't mean that there aren't days where I'll read something. And I'm like, what? You know, I got a crazy message last week about how I'm lying about the Botox thing and that I'm still doing it. and that I don't show my cow face anymore. So how many people even know?

And everybody knows who your boyfriend is. And this person hates you and that person hates you. And I mean, very much coming from an unwell person I could tell. Very. But, you know, sometimes, like, you can be in a low place. And then you read that. And the crazy ones always stay with you a little bit more than, you know,

people can say 100 positive things. And the one negative one is the one that you're going to remember. remember, but for the most part, I ignore it. Is there anything that someone has said that may have, like, pissed you off so bad in the beginning and you're kind of like, ooh, maybe there's a shred of truth to that? For sure. Oh, my God. Those are the worst. Those, when you sit back and you're like, well.

Yes. And I think that that's also the one about having a cow face and like, what is that? What is that? It was very disturbing because it was just so long and detailed. and I was like, whoa, this is like, you know, kind of scary. But it didn't really affect me. Right, because it's crazy. But it's always, if you, there's a saying in recovery, if I'm disturbed, it's because

now I'm going to butcher it. Essentially, like, it's something in me that needs some attention. Right. So if somebody is leaving a comment or sending me a DM or something and I'm disturbed, it's because there is a shrub to it. I mean, even like, okay, so even last. year I've talked about this. I was Botoxed to the gills. Okay. And I loved it at the time. And I remember, especially last summer, like I just, I had gotten when you were talking about not Botoxing someone

every month, I'd probably done like two or three consecutive months, not a full face Botox, but like full. And then like, oh, I see a little movement here. So like, let's just like get that. And when I see video of myself from last summer, there are a few videos in particular that I'm thinking of. I mean, I could not move my face. I remember recording my podcast in New York. And I was trying to smile. And it was like, because I had the massaders and like the temples and the forehead and the eyes and the bunny lines and the I couldn't smile. And I remember people being like, yeah, like you can't move your face. You look a little uncanny valley. And I'm like at the time, I was like, defensive and now I look back and I'm like, yeah, it was like uncanny Valley like wearing a mask of a face because I literally couldn't move. And if people like doing that, you do you. At the time, I was like, I like being frozen. I don't want to have any movement. But I'm happy to own up to that, you know. But that doesn't mean that people should like point everything out. And I think because I am so open about like procedures I've done and my beauty treatments and all that, people take that as open season on you.

Open season. Yeah, carte blanche, they can say whatever they want about how I look. I think that people should have a little more tact when it comes to that. But for sure, and not just about like appearance things. I mean, there have been things over the years that people have said. Another one actually that I don't think I've talked about last year when somebody commented on my TikTok about how like sad I looked all the time. And I got really defensive. And I was extremely. sad, you know, I was at the lowest point in my life last fall by far lower than the lowest lows when I was drinking and using because I was almost 10 years sober and I was like, I don't think my life is supposed to be like this. Right. You know, I had this health issue that I didn't think was ever going to change. I thought that I had permanently damaged myself, my brain, and my nervous system. My marriage was unraveling. I'm trying to keep it together and make content and put on a brave face and yeah so I did get defensive about that because they were right I was fucking sad I was miserable but I was also like but I don't want to talk about that you know on

social media right right okay that makes perfect sense do you ever get confused about wellness stuff since you have so this is good so many differing opinions on the podcast never no never because do tell I'm confused and I'm I'm into space. I mean, I interview people because I'm curious to hear their perspective and hear their knowledge and the information that they have to share, but I don't take it as the word I'm looking for. As the Bible? Yeah, I don't take it as the Bible. And another saying that we have in recovery is take what applies to you and leave the rest or take what you like and leave the rest. So I talk to people day in, day out, whether they are doctors, therapists, experts in whatever field. And they all have

different opinions and different perspectives and different tips and everything. You know, I have a curiosity about all of it. But when it comes to applying it to my own life, I would say maybe 1% of it. I even think about applying it to my own life. I love that. That's great. And I feel like I've really come to this place with my wellness and my health and everything where I know the tools that I have in my toolkit that I can take out to use when I want to feel a different way or, you know, if I need to sleep better, if I need, whatever the circumstances are. So sometimes when I'm listening to somebody, I'll file something away and be like, that's interesting. Maybe I'll come back to that if I need that. Exactly. But maybe I'm just

listening to it from a different angle because I'm not listening to it. as, you know, this is what I have to do. And what this person is saying is 100% like he said, Bible. Like, that's not how I. I think that's great because I cannot tell you how many people come into my office with like a bag full of supplements because they listen to like a billion different podcast or they watch the Today show in the morning. And they come in and I'm like, why are you? Well, I don't know. This one said this. And I think that's a really, really good advice for people is like, listen to it, be open minded, but you don't have to do all of it. right now and it's not all what you need. Like I think that's great. Like file it back, maybe go back

to the episode or whatever it is at some point. But I think that that's really, really smart and that should be applicable to us in all of our life. Right. Like a lot of times we see something, we get marketed something. We hear something. We think, oh my God, we need it. I need it. I have to do it. I think that's great. I think with everything like pausing, thinking about it, not rushing to do it if you don't need it is great advice. I love it. Yeah. I mean, I feel like I file it away. And then I can and go back to that if I'm in a situation where I feel like I need that, you know, because, yeah, there's so many supplements, so many tools, so much advice when it comes to nutrition and fitness and, you know, all of that. So I think that it's kind of just like filling the toolbox,

essentially, and then I can pick and choose when I feel like I need whatever tool it is. I don't know if that's making sense. It makes sense. Well, it's so funny. I was listening to the podcast when I was in New York about dreams. And I'm not a big dreamer. I don't remember my dreams. I kid you not. That night, I remembered vividly. No way. Yes. And I was thinking about how. Was it about him? He was actually in it. He's a nice looking man. He's a nice looking man. Yes. I wouldn't mind waking up for my brain surgery and seeing him. Shout out, Dr. John D. All. I remember being like, Wow, we are so influence. And that happened because I was thinking about it.

I listened to the podcast. We probably talked about the episode. And then I remembered my dream so vividly. So, you know, our brains are wild and we don't understand them. And I get why people, you know, want to do all these things and we're always thinking about this. And you have such an influential platform. People really trust you.

And I think that that's great. That they're hearing from you that you're. that you're pretty steadfast in your routine of what works for you. And I think people should hear that from you and adopt that in their own sense. Love that. Okay. What's your guilty pleasure? Was that for me or for you?

I think that's for you. But I mean, I'm happy. Listen, I've got so many I'll be happy. God. Guilty pleasures? I don't know that I have that. I don't feel guilt really about anything. First of all.

Good. Okay. I would say. I mean, you love a. bag. Yeah, but not even that much. We were talking yesterday. Like, my birthday is coming up. I was talking to my Hermes guy. Yeah, you were like being so rational about it. Yeah. And he even sent me, so he sent me one. He did. That was beautiful. But I was like, me, I was like, maybe if I was going to do it, I would want something a little, like, spicier. He sent me, like, four more options,

which I didn't show you. And I was like, love. But also, like, I feel like I'm just kind of not in that phase of my life. I mean, I do, yeah, I don't know. I spend so much money on my business now. And I'm redoing my house and everything. So I'm just like not feeling the urge to go really crazy with like clothes, accessories, things like that. I know. I could even bully you to go to the store to look at the two-tone Kelly with me yesterday. I tried. She's turning over a new leaf. I've been telling them about that they, I've been telling them about it for days. But then like sex in the city. I mean, I think this might be what people are thinking of. Yeah. Sex in the city on repeat always. But but that's not a guilty pleasure.

I'm back in my dream pops era. Yeah, you eat so healthy. Do you remember, oh, my God, she really does eat very, very healthy. Her and I were in Austin, and I'm a vegetarian. Austin's a food desert for vegetarians. We sat down and we ordered the veggie platter

and it came with this, like, vat of mayonnaise. Remember that, aoli? We both almost passed away. You were like, what is happening? What did you get a plate of carrots? They brought me a literal, plate of carrots. Yeah. We took photos because it was that bananas. When I went to Austin this year,

totally different experience because I went with Chris and he is like lives to eat. I mean, which is fun because I'm like a live to eat person, but I just eat really healthy. And if you're wondering what live to eat, it's like there are two camps. This is the theory, right? You eat to live or you live to eat. I love food. I love eating. But yeah, when I went with him, oh my, you would have passed away. No, passed away. It was like, I remember the last day when we were leaving before our flight, we went to brunch or something. And I was like, I'll get some protein. I mean, it was like eggs in Grand Marnier. No. With like cheese on it and like these huge sausages and like steak. Yeah. I was like dying. Someone's like, I ate it. But there's Ariel Lurie the, the wellness influencer.

Yeah, like eating every kind of... Steak and eggs. Yeah. It was like steak and egg on steroids. I mean, it was crazy. Sounds like Austin. Yeah. Which is like interesting because it's got such a wellness.

It does. We just must have missed it. I don't know. Yeah. It was not at our hotel. We didn't find those places. Is there, well, this kind of circles back to that. Is there anything you won't eat for health reasons?

Nothing that I absolutely won't eat. I have had people on the podcast who have had differing opinions. on things like seed oils, right? I knew we were going to talk about that. Yeah. And that is one that I try to avoid. Just when it comes to buying, I mean, I don't cook with it. And I try not to buy things that have it.

And I try my best, like if I'm ordering out to make sure that things are cooked in olive oil. But it's really hard in restaurants because they'll either dilute the olive oil with seed oil. It's expensive. I have this app seed oil scout. Oh. And it's amazing. and you can just search by your location and they show like places that have a green check. They have places with a red X. They have orange that's kind of like in between.

And people do the due diligence and essentially like self-report. So somebody will email the restaurant and be like, hey, I'm, you know, just wanted to confirm what kind of oil you used to cook in. And they'll say, oh, like most things are cooked in olive oil. But if you get the fried calamari, that's canola or whatever. So I check that occasionally. Okay. But I'm not like a hundred percent. Right. Diligent about it. That's one. And then like tons of sugar, obviously would be another one. But I don't, I don't have any rules. Yeah, you really don't. You don't really have food phobia rules. You're pretty go with the flow. I agree with that. This is a great one. Okay. So where do you go for facials, hair, massage in LA? Spill all your self-care places. Take notes, ladies. Facials. I go to Candace. The L.A. facelist. I also go to Biologique sometimes because you got me hooked on the remodeling. Yeah. So good. And then I also go to Kosha Spa in the Valley where they very pleasantly beat the face up. It is so good. But I do the 80 minute custom facial where, I mean, they're massaging your scalp. They're starting on top. They're going down. They're like just moving everything, lifting everything. They do buckle massage.

I walk out of there and I look like I have had a facelift and it's so relaxing. They do sound baths. It's like they're like facial fairies. So those are my facial places. What were the other ones? Hair. Hair I go to Liz. She's at Mare now.

She used to be Tracy Cunningham's assistant at Mesh for many years. She's been doing my hair for almost a decade, I would say. And then Danny Rischoff at Mesh. cuts my hair. And what was the last? Oh, massage. I have two masseuses that come to me. Be nice. Sorry. It's pretty crazy to me to think that as a woman, I have my period for decades, probably 30 plus years once a month. And the products that I'm using for period care are really impacting my body. When you're doing something regularly for that long, you really have to be cognizant about what you are using, which is why I love Quora.

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stress-free. So Article is offering my listeners $50 off your first purchase of $100 or more to claim visit article.com slash blonde and the discount will be automatically applied at checkout. That's article.com slash blonde for $50 off your first purchase of $100 or more. Is there anywhere in L.A. that you think people is a good place to go for like, is there like a day spot? Like, you know, like in New York, they have like remedy or all, you can do like ice bath and saunas and all of the things at once. Is there anything in L.A. that's like that? They have a remedy here. They do. They do. They also have pause where you can do like contrast therapy. They do IVs. They do float therapy. And they have locations all over. Like a half day kind of thing. We always try to go to Toma. Tomico. We can't get in. Tomico. If you're listening.

Yeah, please let us. Please let us in. We want to eat sushi and get massages. We try every time. Yeah. Please. Hopefully they've heard it. How many days a week do you wash your hair?

Two to three. That's a lot. That's a lot. That's a lot. Usually two. Yeah. I'll do like Sunday. Yeah, Sunday and Wednesday or like Monday, Thursday kind of thing.

Usually too. Lucky here without the humidity. It makes it. But also blonde, I feel like my hair doesn't get that greasy. No. I'm sure somebody watching. It's going to say. It's going to be greasy monkeys.

It always looks greasy and dry. Somebody messaged me this morning. It was like, your hair always looks dry. I'm like, sorry. What do you want me to do? Please. Sorry. Please find something else to be worried about.

You know I have Botox my scalp so it doesn't sweat? No way. God. I know. It really works, though. It's just cruel to do to me. Okay, is it weird or awkward to tell your parents or partner if you're going to get cosmetic surgery? I have not found it to be weird or awkward in the past. Definitely not with my parents. And I get that question a lot. How do they? How does your family feel? I'm like, I don't know. Probably like I'm almost 40 years old and doing whatever I want to do. That said, I always wanted a nose job from when I was like 13 or 14 and they wouldn't let me. So I think it was not surprising to them. That was the first thing.

ever did when I did my nose. And even my mom was like, I love it. It's so perfect. I don't know if they have feelings about it internally that they don't tell me, but they're very supportive. And nobody, nobody in my family or my close circle feel like I, A, look like I have tons of work done, or B, look that different because I did little things over time. It's really the internet. Right. Again, back to the judgment thing, who loves to find things. to like nitpick, it's like, okay, I don't really care because again, like the people close to me are like they don't even notice half the time and they don't feel like there's been any kind of like drastic agreed change. And I would say this coming from the other side of the chair of the table

is I tell patients that like a lot of times your loved ones will be like, oh, you don't need anything. And they're coming from a place of love because they don't want to be like, oh yeah, your nose is horrible. You know, so they're like, oh, I love you. And they do love you the way that you are. And I think that advice I would give you is you can tell your partner or your parents, like, I thank you so much for telling me that. But this bothers me. I'd like to change it. And I'm asking for your support. And that gives them the permission to not keep telling you, oh, you look great. You look great. It gives them the permission to know that you don't need that from them. You just want the support. So I think that that if you're the supportive person listening to this, it's okay. to support that person as long as there are no red flags, like you said that you're doing something crazy or you're overdoing it. It's okay to acknowledge that something bothers somebody and support them through changing it. I have a brother that's dealing with an addiction. What as a family can we do to get him to stop using? Nothing.

I don't think there really is anything that anybody can do. Obviously, there are interventions like detoxes, intensive outpatient. inpatient rehab if they have the resources or if they have somewhere that they can send them and if that person is willing to go. But that said, in my experience, it doesn't really matter if you even do those things if the addict, afflicted individual doesn't want to change. So I think alcoholism, addiction is incredibly difficult because the person's suffering has to want to change. And for everybody, it takes different things to get to that point. And oftentimes when loved ones, family members do try to intervene, they become persona non grata because when somebody is reliant on drugs or

alcohol, that's their coping mechanism to life. And so anybody who tries to come between, that is going to get shut out. So it's a really, really difficult position to be in, I think, being a loved one of somebody who's an active addiction. However, if I think back to my own experience, when I guess the last time that I got sober, I did want to stop, but I didn't know how. And I was intervened on. And then when I got to rehab, I was there long enough that like the fog cleared and I was able to see the reality of my life. And I did want to change. And so in a sense, that intervention did help, even though it wasn't me coming to the family or whoever and saying, I want to change. So I think that there's a time and a place for intervening, sending somebody to outpatient, rehab, detox,

whatever it is, because sometimes that person does need to get out of their environment, have no access to the drugs and the alcohol, allow. that fog to clear and then start to do the work on themselves where maybe then they do want to change. But it's, it's really hard because you never know if it's going to take or not. So I always say like the best thing that you can do if you have a loved one or somebody in your life who's struggling is just let them know that you're there and that you're there if they want to get help. And I think that's so hard. And that's like Al-Anon 101 is what's they're saying, disengage with love or something like. that. And it's hard and it's a gamble and it's scary because, you know, oftentimes people's lives

are on the line. And I know in my own experience, my family had a really hard time with that. And, you know, they were paying my rent and they were like sending me some money even when I was in the depths of my addiction because they were like, we thought maybe it would keep you from dying, you know? And then there's the people who are like, nope, I'm not doing anything. Cut them off. You can be homeless. You can live in your car. You know, bring that bottom up, maybe a little more quickly, but that's a gamble as well. So it sounds like, there's no easy answer. Sounds like it's really, really impossible. I know how committed you are to your sobriety. I know how much you believe in AA and the steps. Do you think Al-Anon would be a good resource for this family? Yeah. Yeah,

thanks. Forgot about that. That should be the first thing. Yeah. Okay. Yeah, I think. Yeah, I don't, you know, sometimes people have different thoughts on that, but you think it's a good resource. I think that's great. This kind of goes right. It's the next question. How do you deal with other drinking in a social setting. I don't even notice it. She doesn't. I really don't notice it. In fact, I would say sometimes I encourage it. I think somebody asked on my Patreon about whether my boyfriend drinks and I've talked about this before, but and how do I deal with that? And I mean, he drinks like so minimally, like very rarely once in a while he'll get like he likes tequila. And I love when he drinks tequila because he gets so cute like loose and cute and he doesn't get like sloppy drunk

but oh he was also drinking like a lot of sake one night when we were at Matsuhisa and Aspen and I was like I love this the altitude and the socky it was so funny and cute and like it just doesn't it doesn't bother me you know I couldn't be in a relationship with somebody who was like a heavy drinker and they were a big partier but they wouldn't want to be with me either but as far as like drinking, people drinking around me. Like it usually, literally does not even register. It's not something that I notice. It's not something that I recoil from. It's not something that I'm like, oh, my God, margarita, you know, it's just neutral. I can attest to that. And I, speaking of Colorado, I don't think I've ever laughed harder than photos of Ariel in Colorado gear.

Those are on my Patreon. They. It is hilarious. Early stages, new relationship. Yes. Trying to be down for whatever and go hiking. It was unbelievable. I never thought I would see the day. Buying the gear.

Yeah. All that was missing was my Subaru outback. No offense to anyone that drives an outback. I know it's a safe, great, reliable car. But it was. The things that I said to her when I saw her in her way. Because I had to go buy last minute something to go hiking in the snow. in the snow. It was like rainy snow. Yes. So it was the hiking boots. It was the baggy.

You had wet hair with like a hood on. I mean, it was like a thing. Oh yeah. And I was sending you those pictures of my lips because I had a filler. He kept hiking and I was like, I have things to do. I'm going to stop here. This is an emergency situation. Regers like the whole thing between the lips and then the hair and then the hood and then I saw the socks and the shoes. I was like, oh my God, my girl needs me. Yeah, I was having a crisis with some lip filler. Yeah, I was like, you go on. He was on a mission to get to that top of that hike. And I was like, I can't. It was like the lighting was perfect for me to see what was happening. Oh, yeah, that flat gray lighting where it just makes you look awful. So bad. Oh, my God. Well, speaking of lip filler,

what is your next plastic surgery going to be? Probably a fat transfer in my boobs. They got to find some theft first, honey. I would just like to say that I did go see Dr. Cohen months ago. Five C Cs is going to be able to get. No, he said 100 maybe. Yeah. You guys, if you could see my face, it's not there. Here.

She's skinny. She's skinny right now. Lower back flanks. You guys go back to Austin and have some more eggs and sausages before. Yeah, but that doesn't really work because if you gain weight to get fat, transfer and then you go back to your fighting weight, then it doesn't stay. That is correct. Maybe, okay, so I'll elaborate on that.

Maybe another lift too, because the lift that we did when I got my implant was circumariolar because we were putting the implant in. So the implant did a lot of the heavy lifting. So I didn't do a traditional lollipop or anchor or anything like that. So even though I had like toosis and each of my boobs, we felt that just tightening the tissue a little bit around like the ariola and putting the implant in would give it the nice shape and everything and it did. And then when we took them out, I don't know. I feel like at this stage in my life, yeah, I'm kind of like, I remember Melinda talking about this stage, not necessarily like late 30s,

but early 40s for a lot of women. It's kind of this like kind of gray area, age of frustration, because it's like, yeah, you could start tweaking some things, face, body, but also. But also. also like they're going to change a lot more throughout that decade. So do you want to wait until things are a little bit worse? I don't, I know people are like, yeah, but your nipples are in perfect position. Thank you. I mean, they are. They're perfect. I mean, like, they're not, they're not, you don't, they're, they're good. They're, they're a perfect position. It's, I think it's good. We were going to move those up a little bit. I mean, but they could be in your collarbone, by frankly. Yeah, because they, they look good. I have video that I took of him like,

manipulating the boob a little and showing like where we were going to like yeah do things and put things and it's like yeah it's one of those things where it's like could I do it now and it would look good sure yeah do I need to absolutely not pretty good and could I maybe get a better outcome in a couple years I don't know what and it's kind of what we talked about before is that sometimes good is good enough yeah you know there's a saying about that like the enemy of what is it I don't know the enemy of the good is perfect no the enemy of the good is perfect no the Enemy of the good is the great. I don't know. But you guys know what we mean. As long as your nipples aren't looking at your feet, you know what I mean? And they're, we're good. Like, you know,

all right. Last one. This is a good one. What's your pet peeve? I know what this is, I know what you're going to say. I think I do. I'm so curious what you think I'm going to say. We both suffer from severe mesophonia. Oh, for sure. Okay. That's where, I don't know that that's a pet peeve, though. It's a diagnosis. It's like when you get severe rage over noises, mine is mouth noises. Chewing. Yeah. Chewing, mouth noises, snoring, but especially chewing.

Yeah, it activates something in you where you want to commit homicide. Yeah. I'll send her photos of the person across the airport from me with a bag of chips and she knows exactly. Yeah. Like, don't you dare open those chips? Yeah. That's definitely a huge one. I would also say like flakiness.

I don't like flakiness. Oh, on somebody else. Like you could see. Yes. Like do what you're going to do what you say you're going to do. Show up when you say you're going to show up. Follow through on your word. That is a pet peeve for sure.

I thought you meant like flakiness on their skin. Danielle is like, yes. I know. I was like, you did you not look in the mirror before you left the house? I'm thinking, oh my God, I have that too. Like I just want a denture skin. No. I wouldn't say a no.

No. Flakiness. I'm thinking, yes, you need to moisturize. You mean like a human that's like, flighty, flaky spazes out on things. Yeah. Yeah. That's what I'm sure I have other ones too, but I think we're being told we have time. You guys, this was amazing. You can come over later and we can keep. We'll continue. Yeah, keep talking. Thank you for having me. Thank you. I hope you enjoyed that episode. And if you liked it, and if you like the show in general, take a second to rate, review, and subscribe. It goes a long way, and it's actually the best way to support the show. Also, if you want to see more about each episode, you can head over to the

Blonde Files podcast on Instagram. You can go to areaallory.com, and I'm always posting about each episode over on my personal page at Ariel Lorry. Please note that this episode may contain paid endorsements and advertisements for products and services. Individuals on the show may have a direct or indirect financial interest in products or services referred to in this episode.