Well with Arielle Lorre - 88: Robyn Youkilis - Intuitive Eating, Shedding Emotional Weight and How to Find Peace in the Moment

Episode Date: December 16, 2020

In this episode I’m talking to Robyn Youkilis - certified health coach, wellness expert, and author - about how to find joy and purpose in the present moment; how to cultivate love for ourselves and our bodies; how to be intentional and intuitive with our eating; breaking out of rigidity and finding little habits that bring us happiness; shedding emotional weight and how that affects us overall; how to ground ourselves and so much more.   www.KinEuphorics.com/BLONDEFILES for 15% off your order plus Free Shipping www.HelloNed.com/BLONDE for 15% off your first one-time order or 20% off your first subscription plus Free Shipping www.Headspace.com/BLONDE for a Free 1-Month trial   Produced by Dear MediaSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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or sunnycars. The following podcast is a dear media production. Hey, welcome to the Blond Files podcast. I'm your host, Ariel Lori, and I'm here to talk all things wellness. From how to achieve optimal health and well-being to the best beauty tips and everything in between, no topic is off limits. I know there is so much information out there, so I'm here to help you navigate it all and live your best life.

Thanks for listening. Let's get into it. Hi, everybody. Welcome to the show. Today I'm talking to Robin Eucaly. Robin is a certified health coach, wellness expert, business owner, entrepreneur, mama, multiple hatwear, and the author of two bestselling books, Go With Your Gut and Thin From Within. She has appeared on The View, The Today Show, e-news, the Wall Street Journal Live, just to name a few,

and she's a sought-after speaker on all things, wellness, gut health, and how to connect to your joy and purpose in life. And we actually recorded this months ago, but this is just such a relevant episode for this year. It's really relevant anytime, but it's all about how to be present, how to connect to something bigger than this moment, how to give ourselves grace. And we also talk about just being good to ourselves. And we talk about intuitive eating, living with intention, gut health, and so, so much more. So please enjoy Robin Euclus. So welcome, Robin, thank you so much for coming on the show.

Thank you. Happy to be here. I wish we could be in person, but we'll do the best we can over technology. This is the next best thing. Do you ever get Zoom fatigue? It's so funny about Zoom because I've been running a high-level coaching program called the Rockstar Coaching Collective, which I've since closed, but I ran it for years on Zoom. And before that I did another program called Thin From Within, which was a precursor to my last book. and that was for years. So I've been showing up on Zoom for, wow, like five, six years now since it first came out. So I get all the whole Zoom thing. That's why I've been going on media and stuff sharing about Zoom is a thing. There's energy. It's not the same as a phone call. You've really got to manage yourself and what you show up with and clear your space after.

And that doesn't even need to be sage and crystals woo-woo stuff. It's literally just like open the window, take a breath and let it out. So yeah, Zoom fatigue is real. It's a thing. but I feel like I was, you know, I've practiced for this. You're an OG. I've trained. I've trained. And what's really funny about that is even before I did one of the first live streams with a live cooking class that I did, I think, oh, for Facebook,

before there was even like a live stream act. We had to, like, rig it from the back kind of thing. And now, like, it's nothing. It's just we advance so quickly now. I wonder what's next. I wonder what's coming. I know. It's crazy.

I was thinking about that and thinking about, like, how different things are at this point in our lives than six months ago. But how it, I mean, I hate the term new normal, but we do adapt. Like it just becomes like we're so adaptable. We just get used to things. And so I wonder the same thing. Like what is next? What is it going to look like in six months? I mean, who knows? We don't know. We don't know. It's the ultimate lesson in presence and all these wellness terms we've thrown around, right? The journey and presence and, you know, grounding yourself, but this is what we've been training for. You know, it's here. This is it right now. I love that you said that because, I mean, I've learned, I've been sober for six and a half years.

Mazel to have. So amazing. Thank you. And one of the principles, you know, the foundational aspects of recovery is being present, being in the now, not being in the past or the future. And accepting the present moment exactly how it is. That doesn't mean you're accepting the entirety of it, right? But just accepting this moment. And if I can accept this moment and then I can accept the next moment, then I can have peace. And you're so spot on about this situation. Like I don't necessarily believe that this is like a cleansing of the universe and, you know, yada yada. People are dying and sick and it's horrible. But it really has forced us into this position of having to accept the present moment and having to be in the now because we don't know what it's going to be like, like back to our original point. we don't know what it's going to be like in a week or a month or a year.

And I think it's kind of like smashed this illusion that we ever had any kind of control. 100%. Yeah. You know, I did have the fortunate moment of leaping into acceptance around this. I've definitely had my up and down days. But just this, okay, here's where we are. We can't fight it. We can do the best with what we have and we can trust deeply.

and I had this little moment flashed before me of where did I get this from? And honestly, not to go so deep and back right away, but when I was 17, my father was really sick from cancer. And he was from Cincinnati, Ohio, and we got him there to kind of say farewells and his last trip. And what we knew would be his last trip. And it was a cousin's wedding. And I remember being in, you know, the aisles and looking over at him. and he was in a wheelchair at the time. And I had this moment of, oh my God, my father's not going to be at my wedding. And just this true realization of, wow, okay,

that's not the future, the future that I was playing out in my mind that I assume was a gift or a guarantee or just something that would be handed to me was no longer going to be my reality. And I think in that moment, one would assume that I would feel angry or panicked or, you know, outraged or whatever it was, but I remember feeling calm. I remember feeling like an acceptance like, this is the truth.

He's moving on for whatever reason beyond what we could ever possibly understand. And I believe in trust one day, it will make sense, right? Somehow, if God could create the universe, whatever it is you believe, like a leaf, a flower, your hand, your ear, all these incredible things. There's definitely this moment, this lifetime can't just be it, I believe. And just this plug into this deeper knowing of trust and faith and knowing that whatever vision you might have had might not happen. And so how can you really firmly stand and nourish and ground and be in the moment that you're in? And you can still have dreams and goals and things you're working towards,

but really being here. And I think in this current to bring to this current time, you know, maybe I've had some experience in this area and I feel like I've really been able to be here and be that for my community and the people I love most. I always joke for people on my team, you know, everyone having tough days. I was like, stick with me through a crisis. You know, I've got this. You know, and in just sharing that, you know, believing in something bigger than this moment and how does that resonate for you? And I don't know, maybe this sounds wild and so far from what you already believe, but maybe it doesn't, or maybe there was just a little reminder that we all

needed and myself included. Yeah, no, I love that. I totally believe, and that's been the foundation of my recovery. It's believing in something bigger than myself. And it's such a relief. It takes the burden off of me and having to control and manage every single thing, right? And I think what you were saying about your dad is interesting. I think that we all feel like we would only be happy if things go exactly how we want them to go and that if X, Y, or Z happens that we think is the worst thing in the world, we're going to be absolutely miserable. And usually it's in those moments where the bad thing happens that we find peace and we find spiritual growth. And, you know, the spiritual growth doesn't happen when everything is going according to our plan. So it's just so interesting.

Totally. And it's typically not cute either. We think it's full of ahas and wisdom and insights and tweetables. And typically it's just messy and tired and funky. Exactly. Exactly. We are talking a lot about being present, being an acceptance, and grounding ourselves in this episode. And there is no better way to do all of this than with meditation.

You know it has changed my life. It's my number one wellness tip. And it affects every single area of my life in a positive way. In my experience, it is a surefire way to be sustainably less reactive, calmer, more at peace, more present, more grateful, happier. So there are many different modalities, but Headspace is a fantastic resource and such a good place to begin or maintain your meditation journey. So Headspace is an easy to use app that delivers your daily dose of mindfulness in the form of guided meditations. I love using headspace when I'm feeling overwhelmed, if I can't sleep, or if I just need a quick refresh. They have a three-minute S-OS meditation. That's my go-to if I'm getting panicky. And Headspace's approach is advancing the field of mindfulness and meditation through clinically validated research. And it can seriously help to reduce stress, improve sleep, boost focus, and improve your overall

sense of well-being. I always say that if we could get all of that from a pill, we would take it with even questioning it. So this just takes a little bit of willingness on our part, and I promise you the benefits are massive. You deserve to feel happier, and Headspace is meditation made simple. So just go to Headspace.com slash blonde. That's H-E-A-D-S-P-A-C-E.com slash blonde, B-L-O-N-D-E, for a free one-month trial with access to Headspace's full life. Library of Meditations for every situation. This is the best deal offered right now. So head to headspace.com slash blonde today. Now back to the show. Hey guys. I'm Kinsey from the I Love You So Much podcast. On my show, we talk about everything lifestyle, business, finance, beauty, you name

it. My favorite part about the show is the amazing guest that we bring on. We have everyone ranging from like business experts to influencers, CEOs, creative master. minds. It's so much fun. If you guys want to find me on Instagram and it's just at Kenzie Elizabeth. I release new episodes every Thursday. So hope to see you there. So why don't you tell everybody a little bit about yourself now that we've, now that we just dove right into deep stuff. Fresh course. But yeah, tell them about yourself and your business and all of that. Yeah. So Robin Euclis here, author, mama, speaker, all those things. But mostly just a human and sharing my experience.

in this lifetime and what lights me up and what does it? What's the opposite of that too? And how I got into this professionally was always from a deep love of food. I would obsess over cooking meals for my boyfriend at the time. I was living L.A. then and going the farmer's markets and realizing there was a world beyond Trader Joe's and what that could mean for me career-wise. I've also always loved performing. I was an actress as a kid and just really light up in showing up on camera in the media and doing anything like that, hosting retreats, etc. And though I had no idea where any of this would go. So a friend of mine mentioned about the Institute for Integrative Nutrition.

So this was 12 years ago. So at the time I went to the school live, moved back to New York City for it. And I had no idea what I was doing. I was like, oh, how do you be on TV with food? There was no like, here you go do that. So I did what they told me to, which was train me in how to be a health coach and how to open a coaching practice. And so I mostly credit my success to just doing what I was told.

And that being said, I certainly didn't go my days without fear and imposter syndrome. And who am I? I was the person who knew the least about wellness. And I never went to Whole Foods. I thought it was all weird and didn't do yoga or any of that. But I was like, okay, this is something that in my soul I am committed to. And so rather waiting for it to be perfect or so in alignment or so connected, which is great when that happens, I just kept doing the next.

right thing. And so I got clients, had my practice, your healthiest you, kept going with all of that. All at the same time, I really was suffering from a lot of anxiety, depression. I would have a lot of days in bed and still struggling with my body and food. I'd no really mention that before, but I'd always been a chronic diet or overeater, binger, eating my feelings. I've shared about my dad earlier. My dad was someone who ate life whole and struggled with weight, his whole life. And that was definitely something that we connected on. I used to see him sneaking bagels in the pantry and my mom's cookies that she hid.

And we would be partners in crime with that. You know, he'd be like, Robin, don't you want a soft pretzel and those gross pretzels in New York City, which are never good, but I will still order them. They are never good. It actually sounds pretty good, though. Right? They always do.

It's like warm, salty, mustard pretzel. But after two bites, you're like, this is not good. But I'm going to eat it anyways. So we would eat those together. and, you know, I always struggled with my weight, body image, et cetera. My mom's naturally thin. My brother could eat anything. And there I had my dad.

And it was all very confusing. And so this followed me through adulthood as well, never being happy with myself. And in addition to my passion and love for cooking and food and this new relationship I was in, I also really, if I'm being totally honest, thought that this nutrition school would be the thing to fix me. Like, oh, they're going to finally give me the diet plan so, you know, I can stop struggling. so hard. It didn't really work that way. So fast forward through my coaching career, I still was struggling with my weight and I don't even want to say wait. Like, let's forget that for a minute. I was struggling with overeating, eating past the point of knowing that that was what I needed, constantly looking for

something in the cabinets that I wasn't feeling in myself. And even though I had all these tools and I was teaching them, I feel like it never calmed the F down inside of me. And when things started to really change, actually was when I started to think about having a baby with my husband, my daughter now, Navy, who's four. And I was like, okay, this is a project, right? You give me a project. I'm good at this. I can do the things. I can do what I'm told. So I was like, okay, stop eating tuna fish because of mercury and all these things that don't eat crappy foods that are diet foods. And in this process of getting my body ready for baby, I realized like, wait a second, you know, this baby's going to live in this belly for nine months, but I live here permanently. You know, shouldn't I be

taking care of this home from this place? Of how am I truly showing up and taking care of myself? And so through that process, I started to heal a little bit more layer by layer around my relationship with food. And then eventually just started to step more and more into my true passion and light and career and everything that I was doing. And through that, ended up with my first book, Go With Your Gut, which is about gut health and gut intuition. and how they're connected. And then my second book, then from within, which, again, I haven't really shared this publicly,

but if I could go back and change that title, I would. The book is not about weight loss. It's all over. It's like literally I start with it in the book. I'm like, this is not about weight loss. Weight is a feeling in your body. But I know that title can be misleading, but it was at the time when there was such a transformation

in the wellness industry and really a shifting in language and being much more aware. And so I hope now I'm part of that change and that growth rather than, you know, kind of an old container of weight loss and this equals this. And then you'll be do this and then you'll be happy. So I don't know if I've kind of lost my story, but this has led to lots of coaching programs and retreats. And more recently, I've been leading a lot of meditation sessions,

what I called guided grounding sessions, because I was thinking about what I thought was the best part of my work. And in all my coaching, it was always leading these sessions, which was really just to get people into their bodies, into their hearts. Because so much is just, it's, it's, it's a lot of noise, right? Even though social media is amazing, it's so much information coming at us. And what I really want to train people around is not just listening to their gut and their gut hits and how to clean up their gut so they can live from their gut. But then my next, I believe, chapter in my work is how to bring that into your heart and connect it all into this like beam of light that lives within your chest, in your soul, in your spirit, in your place of love,

of joy, of freedom that is with you every day and how to de-miss it. to do that, to make that a real part of you and not part of these big ahas or big transformations, but just really, who are you in the morning? Who do you wake up with and who do you go to sleep with? And what are all the little moments of connection and grounding that make you feel most like you? I have a new holiday winter ritual. And let me just tell you, it's the high point of my day. So you know, I'm sober, but that doesn't mean I can't enjoy a nourishing beverage to unwind and feel festive, and I'm doing just that with kin euphoric. So kin euphoric are alcohol-free, adaptogen and neutropics boosted beverages formulated to help you relax, curb stress,

elevate cognitive function, including clarity, memory, and creativity, and just have a good time without the booze or the hangover. So here's what I'm doing, and people tell me this tastes like an apparel spritz, which I wouldn't know because I quit drinking before this was a thing. but it is so delicious. So it's called a kin spritz. It's sparkling apparel like brain boost without the crash or the hangover. So I just open the sprits around like 4 p.m. to beat my afternoon slump and shift from work into play or relaxation mode. They also have the high road, which is kind of like an herbaceous flavor, a feeling of a lifted mind and relaxed body. It's great for a social hour. Maybe if you're doing like a Zoom happy hour. And then there's the dream light. This is like a booze-free nightcap.

It tastes like a morrow and melts away my stress and I sleep like a baby and wake up feeling amazing. So Ken Euphorix has worked out a special deal for listeners of the podcast. So you can receive 15% off plus free shipping on your order. All you have to do is go to caneuphorix.com slash blonde files. Or you use the code blonde files, B-L-O-N-D-E-F-I-L-E-S at checkout to claim the deal. So again, that's kinuphorix.com, K-I-N-E-U-P-H-O-R-I-C-S dot com slash blonde-F-I-L-E-F-I-L-E-S. Let's get back to the show. There's so much that I want to cover in there, but I want to go back to something that you said in

the beginning and that was that you were kind of hoping that the program that you did would fix you and that you would get the diet plan and I think so many of us have been there. I've certainly been there myself and a lot of people who follow me and who listen to the show, I think are just waiting for someone to tell them what to do, what to eat, what to do for the workout. And I'm curious how you went from that to approaching it from a different place and being more fulfilled within because that's the key, right? right, at least for me, like being really fulfilled, being in acceptance, like what I was talking about before, radically accepting, and then taking the next right action, which you mentioned,

which is also a recovery thing that I hear a lot. Now I'm losing my train of thought, but when I do those things and when I'm feeling fulfilled and have that inner peace and all of that, then I approach wellness different. And then I make decisions about what I'm going to eat. and I have that intuition. I'm connected that way. I make better decisions about what movement I'm going to do that day. And it all just kind of flows. And it's not from this like rigid, punitive place. So how did that shift happen for you? Yes, great question. So first of all, it's something that I wouldn't even classify as happened. It's something that's always happening. I really, really say and try and teach

and preach that there is no there. And even with myself, whatever lifestyle that I, I've settled into that worked for me last month, likely won't even work for me now. And so the best thing that I can share and teach all of you is how to tune in on a daily basis to understand your body where you're at and what you need. And there's absolutely some food and eating practices that are likely to be supportive of a lot of people. There's nothing here that I'm preaching that's that different. Vegetables are wonderful.

Cooked is probably better than raw. Protein. healthy fats, you know, like if we can just put that conversation aside for a minute, it's not about the what, and we know this, it's about the how. And if you are treating that as this is the right meal for me and you're holding on and gripping so tightly and not giving your digestive system the space it needs to process that food for you and extract the nutrients and get rid of what you don't need, you're just, it's making everything a lot harder.

So first off, I like you likely and a lot of people listening, I had tried everything. So I think first there's a history of, well, none of that, worked. And I learned that the more I tried to do anything, the more my body was like, F you. Right. It would work maybe. I'd get hot on something. That's why I said. Any program that ever worked for me, it never worked the second time. Yeah. Right? Which I think is, I was like, why can't I do that again? You know, it's so true. Anytime I try to do anything. And look, I get that maybe what I'm hinting at here is intuitive eating, tuning in, things like that. I don't like to use even the phrase intuitive eating,

because I feel like I'm not even sure that that's what I do. I feel like that can feel scary for people. Well, then my intuition's just going to want croissants and all of these things, and then I'm going to get fat and I'm just saying it, right? The thing is I do eat croissants. I do eat this. I do eat that. But what the main thing that I do is that I'm calm when I'm making these choices.

I'm listening. And I'm putting more focus on energy around all the other times in the day rather than meal time. So if you're just focusing on what's the ideal breakfast, am I intermittent fasting, am I doing a smoothie, am I doing this? That's not your life, right? That meal choice is not your life. But what I'm more interested in is what did you do and how did you feel and what did you think about yourself from the second you opened your eyes or even a moment before until that breakfast? Did you take a few deep breaths? Did you take a pause? Did you give yourself some real time to poop on the toilet or did you

forget that you actually need time to do these things? Did you have a, of water. Did you look at, you know, if you live with someone, did you look them in the eye and say good morning? Did you say good morning to yourself? So I think the more that we can build those habits in. And look, I'm not even talking about a morning routine. This isn't like a whole thing. This is just life. This is just how how are you showing up for yourself in all these little seconds, these moments, these minutes of your day so that when you go to make the food choice, it feels easy. Yeah. It doesn't feel as much like a thing. Exactly. It's all the intention. It's all the tension behind everything. And then combine that, of course, with, you know, how well is your body

functioning, right? Some people might have hormone issues, gut issues, things that really do need to be cleaned up, you know, taking care of and worked with forever. You know, and then the food, what is the food that you're eating? I really do focus. I know it's kind of lame to say, but most of the time I am eating, quote unquote, healthy food. And then the other time, I don't worry about it. I finished off a container of ice cream last night and cookies. I feel great about it. I woke up this morning was not a big issue. Whereas yes, typically old me would have been eating that, probably continued to eat even more and woken up saying, well, I've got a diet or work that off. It's just this calm. And not that I'm so calm all the time, but the more moments of that

calm I can find, the less it's about the food. It's about the diet. It's about whatever that breakfast is that's going to fix me. And it looks more like you have a life. That food can be a wonderful part of. And if you feel yourself slipping away from that, what does that say? It's not that you're bad or you fell off the wagon. It's like, well, where am I at in my life? How am I feeding myself? How am I nourishing myself? How are where am I breathing? It's such a big picture thing. Yeah. I can't remember who was on my show, but maybe it was a therapist. And she said, I think that so many of our problems or our perceived problems are a result of our inability to just slow down. Just slow down around everything that we do because that does allow us. So hard to trust that.

Yeah. So hard to trust that though. It allows us to become more intentional, right? Or at least be more aware. Like I was listening to another podcast. I can't remember who is an Eckhart Toll was on it. And he was talking about these different tendencies that we have. And he was talking about like people who struggle with eating and binge eating and just having kind of excessive desires, right? And he was talking about, he said that the key component there is to just have awareness. Like having awareness around that desire, it can change everything. So, yeah. And also loving myself with 10, 15 pounds more on than if I was at like a leaner,

trying kind of weight. Because the more as I shared, like, the less I try, the better. But my happy and comfort zone isn't me being like, well, look at my, this is dream body taking pictures and selfies and things like that. I never thought I was there when I was there anyway, so I'm not going to think I'm there now. So am I softer around the middle right now? Absolutely. Have I filled my Instagram with feed with images that support that of what our bodies really can, should, and look like? Am I like, oh, my thighs look like that? Okay, cool. No one really cares. They don't. Yeah. They don't.

I think we are all looking for ways to chill out this year and the holidays, especially in quarantine, can be particularly stressful. You guys know I'm all about lifestyle modifications and tools to cope with stress and anxiety, but I found that I had this physiological fighter flight thing going on more often than not this year and I needed some assistance. So I'm happy to report that Ned CBD totally changed the game for me. And I know for quite a few of you as well because I've gotten some amazing messages from some listeners who have tried it. So CBD can be great for anxiety, stress, insomnia, soreness, pain, nausea, and so much more. Ned is a science-backed, naturally sourced CBD wellness brand with the highest quality full spectrum CBD extracted from organically grown hemp

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Go to www.com. Blonde, B-L-O-N-D-E. Or enter the code blonde, B-L-O-N-D-E at checkout for 15% off your first one-time order. or 20% off your first subscription order plus free shipping. So again, that's hello ned.com, h-e-l-l-l-o-n-ed dot com slash B-L-O-N-D-E to get 15% off your first one-time order or 20% off your subscription order plus free shipping. Now back to the show. We have this obsession around having the ideal body, right? And I think, I think a lot of people still feel like if they just had this body, then everything else would be okay.

And I think there is like kind of an understanding that it's a little bit of a myth. And I've been in the exact same position as you. I had, you know, I did the program and I was counting the macros and I was forcing my body into this mold that I saw fit. You know, I'm already petite, but I wanted to be more. I wanted to look a certain way. And when I was there, I didn't even know that I was there. And now I look back on it and I'm like, God, I looked horrible. And I was so obsessed with like, all I thought about was food and exercise.

And, you know, what am I, what was I really trying to control and manage? I was trying to manage my emotions or something or my perception of myself or, I don't know, through those things. And it's so freeing when you get to that point in your life where, like, it doesn't matter. It doesn't matter. where you can be fulfilled from other things. And it's just, you know, but there's no, unless you have an answer for this, there's no easy way to get there.

I don't think. And it's, as I said before, it was messy and it's complicated. And I also want to share too that if somebody feels that they're in a place where they really would feel more comfortable losing some weight, or they know that they're eating beyond the point that they're comfortable, or they haven't found that sweet spot yet, I want to honor you to. You know, I've been, I've been tooling away with this for years and years to learn where I really do feel my most like me where it doesn't stress me out, where I can eat in a way that feels good for my body.

But I also want to say, like, if you're not there yet, that's okay too. You know, we've got a lot of wonderful conversations happening in body positivity and body acceptance, but, you know, if you're not there, that's okay too. You know, it's really keep coming back to how is it that you want to feel slowing down, calming down, quieting down as much as possible, and having all the grace and patience with yourself. You know, I said, you know, when I used to work one-on-one with clients, you know, we've been like a six-month program, I'd be like, this is going to take you a couple of years just so you know. I'd be like, well, I'd be like, just hear that now, you know, kind of that

sort of like my style, right? That first layer of acceptance of rather than feeling upsetting, upset by that, can you feel empowered by that? Okay, well, I've been here for 30 years or whatever it is, you know, oh, it's likely going to take me a couple years to dial the noise down a little bit and to share too, again, I am a work on progress with this. This is something that I tune into every single day, every single day and I probably will for the rest of my life and that's okay. So what would you recommend to the listener who is like, I'm at that place where I'm not happy and I don't have a good relationship with food. I don't have a good relationship with my body and I do want to make changes,

but I also want to accept, I mean, if you're at ground zero, how do you start? So first accepting where you are, right? No matter where you are in the process. I talk a little bit about in thin from within of letting go of a used to be. We keep ourselves stuck a lot by thinking about

I used to be able to run half marathons. I used to be able to wear a size six, whatever it is. So maybe doing some journal, realizing what is the use to be that you're holding on to and can you make peace with that. And then I also think really, you know, having a conversation with yourself where you can be in juxtaposition with yourself. You can be in opposition with yourself. You can be working to love yourself and trying to change yourself at the same time. Like it's all messy and imperfect. And the more that we can be comfortable in that space, the less pressure we're going to

put on ourselves to make it a thing that we think it's supposed to be. And then I would say from there, you know, are you breathing when you eat? Are you chewing? We talk so much about, you know, is this the right plate of macros or whatever it is? But like, are you chewing that food completely into liquid? That's one of the best things that you can do. You know, I talk myself about the being gut health queen and talking all about digestive health. And I keep it so basic. It's almost embarrassing. But literally, are you chewing your food and looking at all the parts of your life and getting real about what it is that's weighing you down because the weight is likely a part of it, but what in your life is not lighting you up? And then also knowing too, again, it's not the,

well, I wish I had a career as an influencer or this. That's not going to be the thing either. But what is it that you're seeking in that? What's the feeling? And how can you carve that path for yourself now and find that joy in your day in this moment without waiting for a thing to happen to you or knock on your door. And I know that wasn't like a super start from here and end up there kind of answer, but that's the truth of what it typically ends up looking like. And to know you're going to have days up here and you're going to have days down here and that there's never going to be a fixed weight that you're going to be at.

Can you give yourself a range or that you're comfortable? Or maybe you are someone who's ready and wants to throw the whole idea of weight out entirely. That's been my, you know, 2019, 2020 of really what do I really think about my weight and physical number on the scale and like a new layer of shedding that, continuing to shed this. Yeah. So you talk about physical weight and emotional weight, right? Yes. So can you talk a little bit about the emotional aspect of it? Yeah. It's funny because with my my second book, thin from within the publisher, they were like, oh, we want a weight loss book. And I was like, I don't want to write a weight loss book. That sounds horrible. And it's such a complicated,

it confusing story. You know, you have to make a lot of, this is the way assurances in books, you know, to get them sold. And that's the publishing industry. And then I thought about it and thought about it. And I realized with my clients, like that was, even though I wasn't calling it weight loss, it was something that I was working on with them when I realized that it was emotional weight that we were working on. That maybe we were talking about what they were eating and how they were eating it. But we were kind of alluding to what I shared before. We were talking about what is it that they need to let go of? And what are their real dreams and passions that they're not giving themselves credit for or a voice to or talking themselves out of? And so when I talk

about emotional weight weighing you down, what are you carrying around right now that you need to put down and let go of? That you will end up feeling so much lighter and brighter than any physical number you could possibly move off of your body that's reflected on a scale. So we have physical weight, right? The matter, our bones, our cells are blood. Also nice to look at our bodies, too, aside from just fat and weight and more like, wow, I have bones and blood coursing through me and like looking at your body and I do body all these body exercise where you tap on yourself to kind of wake up your pro preceptors and brush yourself off to shake off the end of the day. We're like really making our physical selves much more a part of ourselves. I remember in the process

of having my daughter and going to see the doctor that they joke that, you know, most women don't want to look down there or know anything that's going on. I'm like, oh, I want to know everything. If I could literally like crawl inside my vagina to understand how it's in there. Because I believe that is the grossest graphic I have ever given anyone. But hopefully I made you laugh. I can't help myself. But if I made you laugh, it was worth it. But I do believe the more that we can see ourselves and recognize all the parts of ourselves, the more we can feel connected to ourself and live our life from that place as well. So that's, you know, recognizing that our physical weight is, is all these beautiful parts of us. It's our hair, our ears, everything. And then that

emotional weight, right? The, can I say S-H-I-T? Or the, you know, the shit that we carry around literally and figuratively. You know, what are the emotions that are not ours? And then also, you know, use the word shit. Like, what is it that you're not letting go of out of you? Actual physical poop, that's not coming out of you that wants to. You know, that's why I talk so much about gut health because you need to take out the trash. And, you know, in my weight conversation, I hope to bring some of these layers to everyone to recognize that it's, you know, so many parts of this chat that we're having. Well, and they're so, excuse me, they're so interconnected.

It's hard to approach something like weight loss from a healthy place if you're carrying around all this emotional baggage, right? And how do you discern, I don't know, between trying to fix something emotional by changing your outside and actually trying to, you know, achieve, I don't know, better health or whatever? They're so, so interconnected. And also, like, I talk about this a lot, but I personally carry a lot of my emotional stuff in my gut. Like, it's all there, unfortunately. Yes, I've listened to the podcast. I'm one of those people where I'm like, I'm doing everything right. I do it all.

I chew my food. I don't, you know, I don't eat in front of the screens. I eat clean. I do this and that. And I still have struggled off and on with gut issues. And so maybe you've heard that like when I was in therapy for trauma and we were doing breath or not breathwork, we were doing brain spotting. I always forget the name of that.

But basically you kind of relive your trauma and you follow this pointer and until you find a space where you're looking that activates a certain part of your brain where it activates your whole body. And all of a sudden when I was doing this, my body went numb and I started sweating profusely and my therapist kind of held me there

and she said, okay, where do you feel it? And my whole body was numb except for my gut was like butterflies, you know, just that tight feeling. And so that's where I carry all of my emotional stuff. So you can't do one without the other. As you're sharing that, I'm just hearing the word, that's your portal. Yeah. That's your way that everything gets in. And that doesn't mean like it's going to all be light, bright, shiny rainbows. No. You know, it's like that's, and when I mean portal, like that's your way, your messages from the universe, your connection to self, just these things that come through that you know are meant for you in your life. And everything has a yin and

yong, a day and a night, a darkness and a lightness. And we're supposed to live our lives that way. And, you know, your gut health stuff's connected to that. You know, and so making friends with that, making peace with that and recognizing when you have those flare-ups and what they mean, and maybe there's something bigger or deeper that, you know, is there for you to listen to and really slow down to a pace that's almost like unconscionable for you. Is that a word? I mean like beyond something that you could ever. Because I hear too for myself sometimes like, okay, slow down. Well, oh my God, but then nothing will get done. And it's like no, can you really spend and likely, you know, most of us need to put time in the calendar or if you've

got a full life with kids or responsibilities, whatever it is. It maybe it's an hour before bedtime, but is that hour before bedtime, are you really in the piece of you? And what are the tools that you need? You know, you shared a healing modality. We all need these things. You know, we need these guided meditations. We need these places and spaces that can give us some support to walk this path into ourselves. And so, you know, it's complicated with gut health, of course. You know, there's so many things, gut brain access and our neurons and emotions. And I remember all my nerves as a kid were always, I would get a stomach ache. That was my joke. I have a stomach ache. My mom would be like, you need to go sit on the toilet. I'd be like, but I don't have to poop. She'd be like, but that's

what you need to do. I didn't understand the difference between like a, you know, a weird feeling in my tummy and needing to go. But honestly, it is connected. And I know it's weird to talk about poop and intuition and gut feelings, but it's all the same place, friends. You know, so again, can we make friends with it. Can we make peace with it? And, you know, be in whatever journey, wherever it is that we're at, you know, without judgment. Let's talk about grounding a little bit because I think that's another thing that people struggle with and how to get grounded. And I think a lot of people are feeling kind of untethered right now. And so, yeah, can you share with us a little bit how you get grounded and yourself? Yeah, so I joke with this that if my family heard me talking and maybe they'll

listen to this about being grounded and calm, they'd laugh because I grew up and the truth is in such a chaotic shouting household where it was, the TV was on and the phone was ringing and it drives me crazy to this day, but the fan for the pots and pans, you know, that noise makes me, oh my God. And the dog was barking and, you know, my mom was screaming. For my dad, my brother was screaming at my mom. I grew up in so much chaos.

And love them. We're all super close, but that's just the family I grew up in. And I would go upstairs. And before I had any tools, I would just put TV on. Like, that was my calming, you know, shut everybody out,

close the door. And my family jokes. Like I broke, I think three televisions. Like I watched so much TV. I blew through televisions. And I used to have this little pink one that I love so much.

I used to watch Save by the Bell on it. But anyway, But anyways, so, you know, as a kid, I clearly, I didn't have any tools. I didn't know what it meant to ground. I just knew that there's chaos out here. And it's making me feel chaotic. And I feel like I can't breathe or I feel like I can't live my life. So if I put on TV, then that will shut that out and that will tune that out.

And pause on that, moving into this wellness lifestyle and this career that I have now stepped into and that I still question every day, like, what am I really doing? what's a health coach? But anyways, so if you're someone who questions all that, anyway, I do too, all the time. You know, am I just another white girl talking about kale? Is this really helping anybody? But, you know, I got to just keep trusting, right? The next right thing. But bringing this into adulthood, and now, you know, since TV wasn't going to be something that I knew was going to really ground me or nourish me, I started to think about how can I really create that cocoon, that calm for myself and teach that to others? And very,

simple practices of, first of all, recognizing that this is a real thing, right? As you said, we're all kind of spinning out right now. There's so much information coming in at us. We need to be responsible for our own emotional well-being right now. And I know we need to be informed. I know depending when you listen to this, a mamas and caretakers are making decisions about school and who even knows what the year ahead could look like. Or if you're listening to this two years from now, what's even happened, right? None of us really know these things. And so, you are going to have to get in the driver's seat of how you take care of yourself. And the best and free way I know to do that is to get grounded so that things can get quiet. You can start to hear

your own messages and then you can trust what is the next right step for you. So I teach that through simple things. Again, nothing new here. Getting your feet in the dirt, even just getting your feet on the ground and shaking them, tapping on your body, rubbing your body parts to say hello, deep breathing, putting a hand on your belly and letting it out, especially us women, we tend to suck it in and hold it in. And so really letting that out, saying it's okay for me to take up this space. It's okay. If I have some mixed feelings about what I'm feeling on the other side of my hand, that's okay. As you can hear, it's a lot of self-talk, right? That's okay. That's okay. This is what I'm telling myself all day long because guess what? No one else is going to say this to me.

maybe my husband, if I'm like, hey, hon, I really need you. And I say that four times. And, you know, he's not doing your call. Like, bless my husband, he's busy. You know, my friends, you know, it's me. I'm going to need to tell myself, it's okay, you're okay. You're doing okay. And then I do lead these guided grounding meditation sessions. I have a bunch on my Instagram and I'm probably going to be doing them live again in the fall in some capacity where it's just me intuitively guiding the listener to their own quiet, their own space. And, you know, maybe you're listening to this and you're like me, you like homework, you know, right now, get out of pen, paper, or flag it for later,

and write down 10 things that ground you. And then make sure that you're doing at least one, two, if not five of them in a day, and keep them as simple as possible. For me, it's a salt bath. It's taking an energy clearing shower at the end of the night. Maybe I don't need to shower, but I will just get in for two minutes

just to wash it all off of me emotionally. Maybe it's putting up boundaries around the news. I was taking my daughter to camp and I was listening to CNN and NPR to stay informed to really understand because we're currently trying to decide what to do for the school year with her. And I realized like it was invading my energy and it wasn't working for me. And I know that that can sound super almost like privilege. Well, you know, you're lucky you can shut that out. You know, there's other ways we can get our information when it's not invading our energy, right? When you come to it with, okay, I'm taking a moment to inform myself right now and I feel

like I can handle it. Like I feel like I can clear it off. So again, walking in the sand and the dirt, putting your face in the sun. The sun is a regenerator. Think of what the sun does on this earth and how it grows, it literally grows things. So imagine just, you know, a few breaths in the sun of your face, the wind, trees, all of this stuff. I know everybody touts nature, nature. I typically live in Brooklyn. So I get that that's not always possible, but there are absolute ways to ground yourself. So have your list and make it something that's not a wellness priority, that it's not a ritual, that it's make it as uninteresting as possible. So that it's practices and things that just become a part of you, not things that you do when you're having an on day or a

wellness focused day or, oh, I took care of myself today. It's even when you're having a crappy day, an emotional day, a day where you lost your shit with your kids or blew up with yourself or whatever it is, or maybe you were unkind, but you're still doing it. And the more that you can do that, the more you're going to feel grounded, you're going to feel like you can handle what you've got coming at you, whatever that is. Yeah, I totally agree with that. I mean, my grounding thing is TM, Transcendental Meditation. And it's funny because I had kind of started, I've been doing it for a couple years. And recently, I've been like so busy and so overwhelmed and like, don't you know, I have so much on my plate. And so meditating twice a day for 20 minutes was like not happening.

I would always do the morning one, but I would do it. I would sit in silence and be like, okay, first I'm going to do my, you know, in my head. And I was just using that time to like think about everything that I had to do. And then I check it off the box like, I meditated. And I started feeling so, oh my God, I was so anxious. I was having panic attacks for the first time in my life. I was agitated all the time. I was irritable and just all the things, you know. And I was like, I don't know what's going on.

So weird. And then I did a podcast. We always know. Yeah, I did a podcast with a TM teacher and because people always ask me about it. And I was reminded about like why it was so powerful for me when I started doing it and like how far off the path I've gotten. And so just the. last week I've been doing it again consistently twice a day, like really just being there,

being present. And for a week, I've been like so happy, so calm. And I'm like, I don't know why. Like what's going. And then I'm like, oh yeah, because I'm taking that time. And, you know, it doesn't have to be TM. Like what you're saying, it can be, it can be anything. But that's what, that's what really, you know, works for me. And it just makes everything, it reaches every other aspect of my life. And, and. Yeah. And so, I mean, I love what you're saying. I think that a lot of people tout nature, but it's so true. It has such healing properties. Like even taking my dog out in the morning into the backyard barefoot and having my feet in the grass is like just a little tiny thing that is so like joyful to me. I don't know why. So those are, yeah, I'm a proponent of those things too. And it can be anything. Like I said, you know, I find myself, I always question it or doubt it and think it's not important enough. wellnessy enough, but when I find myself spinning or I get in the like, I don't know what to do.

I'm supposed to do this or I'm supposed to do that. I get all Libra about my list for the day. And I'm just like, I'm just going to go cook something. And that immediately just calms me, gets me back in my body. I'm breathing. I can't remember what I was stressing about. And it's always worth taking that little time out because things become a lot clearer. Obviously, you know, if you have work demands, you're someone working two jobs, you've got whatever it is that you've got going on, that can be three deep breaths with your hand over your heart. You know, that can be just stomping your feet and saying, I'm here. That can even just saying vocalizing, I'm here now. You know, I'm back. I'm here. So there's all these ways. But,

and then for you with the, you know, the TM thing, I find when I'm scattering myself in my meditations, it's because I'm not trusting that I will remember it is, whatever it is that I'm meant to remember. So I hear the voices. I hear to do lists. or I get visions and I'm just like, I can write them down because it feels so valid to write them down in that moment. Or I can say, I'm going to trust. And I recognize in those trust moments that what I'm doing is I'm validating that I trust. And so therefore, I will be able to trust myself more. So you see, we're always training ourselves around these little things.

We're always exercising certain muscles. And so that's why I share so much about intuition and listening to those intuitive voices because it's true. When you listen more, you are rewarded. with more, then you build it more and more. And maybe it's not these big life decisions, but the little ones in your day, you feel so much better about them

because they feel like they're really coming from you. Right. Yeah, I love that. So to close out, what is one thing that you wish everybody would start doing right now? Oh my God. One? Just one? I mean, typically I want to say

eating raw fermented sauerkraut because everybody needs their probiotics to get that good gut bacteria and you're a microbiome having a little party. But, you know, my little gut health tip aside. Honestly, coming back to what I really think is the heart of this whole conversation, which is trust, slowing down, calming down, taking more time, grounding down.

And so what I view that as, if I'll sum that up in one little thing, is just going to yourself. Like that little thing that we sometimes do with kids or babies. I remember bouncing my daughter going, you know, just that deep internal quiet in and taking that pause, that 10 seconds just for you to hear yourself and not all the other things around you. And then even to hear a conversation like this.

then when you're you're done listening, take a moment and go and then hear what's really here for you from this chat. What was meant for you from everything that we talked about today? And then trusting that, believing it, seeing where it came from inside of you because you took that moment to get really quiet before you connected to it. I love that. And I think that, you know, the core message of this show will connect. It's funny when I go into a podcast thinking it's going to be about one thing. And then we have a completely different conversation. And I think it happens because that's what was meant to happen. And that's what people are meant to hear. So you're so inspiring. And I really love talking to you. So thank you so much for coming on. Thank you. This was really sweet

to just see where this flowed and goad and what wanted to be shared. And thank you for holding the space for that. And thank you to your community for being here and being a part of this. And I really appreciate your time and energy each and every one of you in being a part of this. was really special to do. So thank you, Ariel. Of course. So where can everybody find you? So my website is my name, Robin Euclis. If that's a little hard to remember, my first book is go with your gut. So that's pretty easy. You can see my name. And my blog is robinuclis.com. And then on my Instagram channel, of course, come. And then say hi. Send me a DM. Let me know that you came from the Blount Files podcast. And I just love to hear your stories and what, you know,

you took away from this interview. So treat for me. Amazing. Thank you. Thanks. I hope you enjoyed that episode. If you liked it, and if you like the show in general, please take a second to rate, review, and subscribe. It goes a long way, and it's actually the best way to support the show. Also, if you want to see more about each episode, you can head over to The Blonde Files podcast on Instagram. I'm always posting about each episode there or over on my personal page. at Ariel Lorry.