Well with Arielle Lorre - 90: Q+A + Listener Stories! Talking Celebs, Surgery, Body Image, Life Lessons & More!

Episode Date: December 30, 2020

In this solo episode I’m answering all of your questions including what celebs have made me the most starstruck; if my nose job was worth it; balancing body acceptance with cosmetic enhancements; what I’m lacking in my relationship; if I ever get urges for self destructive behavior; how to not care what others think; what my insecurities are; what my biggest regret is; how to cultivate confidence and courage; biggest lesson of 2020 and more. I also share the most hilarious story that a listener sent in for the funniest end to 2020.   www.Ritual.com/BLONDE for 10% off during your first 3 months. www.Sakara.com/BLONDEFILES for 20% off your first order. www.HelloNed.com/BLONDE for 15% off your first one-time order or 20% off your first subscription plus free shipping.   Produced by Dear MediaSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

The following podcast is a dear media production. Hey, welcome to the Blond Files podcast. I'm your host, Ariel Lori, and I'm here to talk all things wellness. From how to achieve optimal health and well-being to the best beauty tips and everything in between, no topic is off limits. I know there is so much information out there, so I'm here to help you navigate it all and live your best life. Thanks for listening.

Let's get into it. Hello, everybody. We made it. On the one hand, 2020 feels like it has been the longest year ever. And on the other hand, it feels like, isn't it still March? I don't know. It's just time this year has kind of stood still, and it's also gone really fast. But I hope you're all safe and healthy and have not been too terribly affected by the circumstances, but I know that's not a lot of people's realities. So I'm just sending you love wherever you are, whoever you are. And I wanted to end the year, just us talking about the deep and the superficial and also sharing some of your stories from the

year. Let me just tell you, I have the best story that I will share at the end of the episode from a listener. You guys, when I say I was crying, laughing, tears pouring down my face, Chuck too when I read it to him. We were like just in shambles. It's so funny. It's so 20-20. So I'm going to get to some of your stories towards the end of the episode. But now I'm just going to take your questions at random from Instagram. So I'm going to start with this one. It's very random, but I get it a lot. So I thought I would address it. So somebody asked, am I always alone? Or do I just choose not to share people in my life. So for me, it's 100% the latter. I choose not to share. First of all, my husband is intensely private, so I'm just not Instagramming our day-to-day lives very much. And most of my friends

aren't really on social media either. So when we're together, I'm not like going to be putting them on blast on my Instagram when they are private people. But also, I don't know if it's my husband or my age or what, but I have become way more private as well, and I just don't feel comfortable documenting everything. You know, I share a fraction of my life on social media, but I prefer to keep my personal normal life pretty private. And because of that, I'm probably a boring social media personality in that sense, but it's just what I'm comfortable with. It's my personal life is personal. Okay. Biggest lesson from 2020. I don't know. I feel like there have been so, so many or really I feel like it's solidified things that I've known kind of the concepts of, but I've never had to practice them until now. But really the big one would be Yolo. I don't know if people still say that. You only live once, but seriously, I learned do not wait to do things. Don't get distracted by all the noise. Don't wait to call someone if you're thinking about them. Don't want to.

wait to take class or take the trip or move or do whatever you're being called to do. Just do it. Just take action. Don't wait. Don't hesitate because, you know, life's too short. You just never know. And I think we've all kind of realized what we truly want or what we truly need when a lot of the noise and the distraction has been stripped away. So I think that would be the biggest one for me. Okay, jumping all over the place, do I think it's worth partying and hooking up through your 20s? Personally, yes, if you can keep it under control, I feel like there's a lot of validity to getting it out of your system before you move into the next phase of your life. But at the same time, I don't think you necessarily have to do the partying or the hooking

up simultaneously. If you're in a relationship, you can still go out and travel and experience things and be adventurous without like sleeping around. And also you can do all that and not be excessively partying if that makes sense. Like I have friends who got sober young and they still had a lot of adventure and life experience in their 20s just, you know, not blacking out and like waking up with random people and random places and doing crazy shit. Not that you're doing that. but ultimately I think it's a good thing to experiment and to experience everything that you can. So this is kind of related to that a little bit. Maybe what is something I don't like to admit I'm missing in my relationship? Well, first, a partner who is as passionate about salmon as I am.

I mean, kidding and not kidding. But honestly, the only thing that is really really, frustrating about the age difference is that like I was just talking about, my husband has done and experienced so, so much in his life. And he's at a stage where he doesn't want to just pick up on a random weekend and fly to wherever and just have adventures. And we do travel and take big trips, but not to the degree that I have the urge to. You know, I kind of like wasted away my 20s, so I'm living out my 20s and my 30s. And I want to pick up every weekend and go and travel and, you know, just do all this spontaneous. stuff and he does not share that urge. I'll just put it that way. And so, you know, I'm learning that

I can do things with him and then to satisfy that urge, you know, I have to take it into my own hands and take trips with friends. And, you know, obviously a lot of that isn't happening this year. But that's like the one area of contention. I wouldn't even call it that in our relationship. Although right now, you know, he's got the travel book too. I think everybody does. I have been having the best sleep ever lately, and I'm going to let you in on my secret. It is Ned CBD. I have a big problem with waking up at two, three, four in the morning and not being able to fall back asleep. And this does the trick.

There are so many CBD brands out there, which is precisely why I never used it before. And given that I'm sober, I just don't want to take something that will alter me, mentally or get any kind of unwanted effect. And I've had plenty of friends who have experienced that with other CBD brands. So I spoke at length to one of the founders of Ned prior to them coming on as a sponsor and I came away feeling really comfortable and impressed with their brand. It's so thoughtfully made and they're transparent about every step of the process from extraction to the final product. And they share third-party lab reports on their site. And so you can rest assured. you will not get high. Maybe some of you want that, so I'm sorry to tell you that, but really what you'll get is a pure effective product. So as I mentioned, their sleep oil is amazing. They have full spectrum CBD oil, which is great for all CBD uses, including anxiety, pain, nausea, stress relief. They have topical products for pain relief. They have a whole line for women and our cycles. It's all amazing.

Ned is the highest quality CBD out there. And so many of you have now tried it and sent me messages about how much you love it. So I'm really, really happy to hear that it's helping. And I also wanted to point out they have a limited release, immunity blend. And they have a new product called Mellow, which is a magnesium super blend. So make sure to check those out as well. So if you want to check out Ned and try their CBD for yourself, I have a special offer for the podcast audience.

just go to www. www. hello ned.com slash blonde or enter blonde at checkout for 15% off your first

one-time order or 20% off your first subscription order plus free shipping. That's a lot. So hello ned.com H-E-L-L-O-N-E-D dot com slash blonde, B-L-O-N-D-E

to get 15% off your first one-time order or 20% off your first subscription order plus free shipping. Hey girl, hey, welcome to Taste of Taylor, my weekly podcast. I'm your host, Taylor Strecker. You might know me from Sirius XM Radio. I mean, I was there for like 12 years after all.

But then Howard Stern allegedly got jealous of me, so I had to leave. I was actually able to pull myself up by the bootstraps and start my own podcast, Taste of Taylor, which is now officially with Dear Media. I'm so excited to say that. Ha! So I promised you in this podcast you're going to either learn about something. You're going to be inspired by someone that's like always coming from a perspective of like humor. Then this is the place for you.

I hope you enjoy this little snack. Okay. I love a curveball. Was the rhinoplasty worth the pain? Yes. A million times yes. If you want to do it, it's worth the pain. It's not that bad.

When you're going through it, you feel like it's never going to end. But then you look back and you realize it was really only like a week of acute discomfort. It's not even painful. It's really uncomfortable. And then you get over it and hopefully you're very happy with the result and you move on with your life. Okay, how do I stay motivated with clean eating and working out? Really, I sound like a broken record, but just feeling good. I just want to feel my best.

It's that simple. And I am not motivated all the time. I haven't worked out in weeks until this morning because I totally fell off when I was sick, when I had the issues with my inner ear. And it's been really hard getting back into it. I keep saying once I'm done with my semester, just one more week. But something I've learned over the years is I go through phases of motivation and that's okay. And sometimes you need to just act and the motivation will come. And other times, it's okay. You know, we don't have to act. We need to be better at giving ourselves grace. Like, if your best friend didn't work out for a month or ate way more than she wanted or whatever,

would you berate her? No, that would be crazy. You would be like, no worries. Just try again tomorrow. Love you. All good. Like, no big deal. But with ourselves, we are these tyrants where, you know, we do one thing wrong and we just punish ourselves.

So no more, no more of that in 2021. I cannot believe it's going to be 2021. Okay. Who have I been most starstruck by? Hmm. I don't think there's anyone I've met where I've felt like very starstruck. I mean, it's fun seeing major names like mega A-lister's like, you know, Brad Pitt or Lady Gaga or Jalo or whoever, these A-listers are. It's fun seeing them at events and stuff, but it's also weird because they're

just people and seeing them right there with their flaws and their insecurities, and which you can always tell. It kind of normalizes them, but there are a few people. Okay, I haven't met them, but there are two people that my husband knows where I've been like, okay, this is pretty cool, you're pretty cool. So Barack Obama is one. Chuck plays golf with him. sometimes. So that's pretty amazing. And let's see, he's also been friends with Kamala for many years. So that's pretty cool. And another one is before COVID, I don't know if I should be saying that. I think, well, I don't know that this will get back to Jay-Z. Okay. So before COVID, Jay-Z wanted to meet with him about a TV show that he's developing. So Chuck took that meeting. And I was like, okay, when are

we going out on a double date? When are we going on the yacht? When is this happening? It hasn't happened clearly, but maybe one day. Okay, how do I let go of what others think? So I've been told often in sobriety that what other people think about me is none of my business. And for a while in this, in this business, I was like, um, but it actually is kind of literally my business. And, my business, like being an internet personality or whatever you want to call it. But then I realized that trying to make everyone like me and worrying what other people are thinking about me is such a futile endeavor. You know, people are going to think what they're going to think no matter what. So I really try to just no longer expend my energy, trying to convince anyone otherwise and

trying to change anyone's perception of me. So for you, whoever you are, Just try to remember that mantra, what other people think of me is none of my business, and try to focus your energy on things that you're passionate about and things that you're proud of and on doing good things for other people and being a good friend, an employee and family member, whatever roles you have. Because when you feel good about you, it really doesn't matter what other people think. Okay, latest skincare now that I use serums only. Okay, so I'll do this really quick. I'm doing Zoh by Obagi. I don't know if it's Z-O or Z-O, but it's spelled Z-O, obviously, by Obaji, O-B-A-G, the O-G. So I'm doing the cleanser, and I'm doing the toning pads, and then I do some serums. So I like juice beauty, my anti-wrinkle

serum. I like babor, the ampules. And then I do the Zoh stem cell serum. It's amazing. And then I use my trinan, which I've actually been off since I've started the Zoh. Zio, Zo, whatever, because this line has so many actives in it. And so Jen Hollander, my skin guru, told me to lay off the trot until my skin gets used to this. And I am purging a little bit, but the texture and tone and all of that is amazing right now. And let's see, I'm recording this on December 21st, but it's airing on the 30th. So by now I will have also gotten clear and brilliant, which I will also probably have shared about. And that's it, keeping it pretty simple. Do I ever get urges to drink, use, binge, restrict, etc?

So drink and use, not since I got sober. Like literally not since the day I got sober, thank God. Binging and restricting is a little bit tougher. I mean, you hear people say this a lot, but I don't have to drink and use every day, but I have to eat. And eating disorders and disordered thoughts are really tough because no matter how healed you are, no matter where you are in your journey, that voice creeps up out of nowhere. And for me, my thing wasn't so much restricting as it was binging. So there are definitely times, maybe every few months, whatever it is, when I eat way more than I'm hungry for or I eat like three or four cocoa love cookies to the point where I feel awful. but these moments are very few and far between and really a far cry from my old binging behavior,

which was like nightly so much food or the worst, which I used to do back in the BBG days, which a lot of people did and promoted, which was you would eat, quote, unquote, clean Monday through Saturday. And then on Sunday you would binge and feel so sick. and then supposedly then you would have the willpower throughout the week to once again eat, quote, unquote, clean. And I think people still do that. You know, that's basically the idea of a cheat day. But zero out of 10 do not recommend it was pretty awful. So at least I'm hyper aware now.

So if I notice that voice coming back, I can write it down. I can talk to my friends or my therapist or my husband or whoever. I can use the tools that I have now to figure out why it's creeping in. And it's, you know, nine times out of 10, it's related to stress for me or some kind of emotional void. And also, nine times out of 10, if I stay off social media and, you know, stay in my lane and don't look at other people, it gets much quieter. If you want to eat healthier or if you're looking to incorporate more plant-based foods

into your life in 2021, you have got to try Sakara. So I am very particular about what I eat on a day to day basis, meaning I like it to be nutritious, balanced, and of course it has to taste great. Sakara is the best of all the food delivery options, in my opinion, and for good reason, they have organic, ready-to-eat-meals made with powerful plant-based ingredients, and the menu is crafted by chefs weekly, so you will never get bored. They have a very good. They have a very good. They have breakfast, lunch, and dinner, all made with ingredients designed to boost your energy, improve your digestion, and get your skin glowing. I'm looking at next week's menu, and they have some amazing dishes like sexy cinnamon rolls with caramel date sauce, protein granola. They have a root

vegetable bowl with creamy horseradish sauce. They have miso noodle soup, pineapple, unfried rice, maple sweet potato bowl, so much goodness. And if you're not vegan like me, you can just add a piece of chicken or fish if you'd like and you have a gourmet meal ready to go. Along with delicious plant-rich meals, Sakara also offers daily wellness essentials like supplements and herbal teas to support your nutrition. Experience the power of plants as medicine with their best-selling metabolism super powder made with organic raw cacao. It works to boost energy, eliminate bloating, minimize shrewdine, minimize shrews. sugar cravings and reduce fatigue. And right now, Sakara is offering our listeners 20% off their first order when they go to Sakara.com slash blonde files or enter the code blonde files at checkout.

That is Sakara, S-A-K-A-R-A-com slash blonde files, B-L-O-N-D-E, F-I-L-E-E-S, to get 20% off your first order. Sokara.com slash blonde files. Now back to the show. How do I reconcile body acceptance that comes with intuitive eating with getting plastic surgery? Okay. I love this question and people ask me all the time. So you can do both. I really truly believe that you can do both.

Some people may disagree, but let me see if I can articulate this. First of all, I haven't done anything to my body. It's just my face. So, you know, the intuitive eating body stuff and plastic surgery, I haven't gone down that road. But also, I feel like I really do love and accept myself. And I feel like I can really love and accept myself as I am exactly in this moment right now, today. And I can do that and I can still change something to be more aesthetically pleasing to me. I don't know, I mean, I don't know how it looks to other people.

So it's one thing if you're trying to straight up change how you look and another thing to kind of tweak or enhance what's already there. And, you know, the things I've done make me feel like my best version of myself. But I felt good before too. So it's, I can't compare like, oh, I felt ugly and insecure before and now I feel good. No, I felt good and now I also feel good. So what I'm saying is I didn't need them to feel good or to feel better. And I wasn't doing it. to change anything about how I felt on the inside. But I feel good having had them. So now listen back to that and take a shot every time I say feel good. But also, I think living in L.A. where getting plastic surgery is like getting a manicure, it also really minimizes it. So it just does not feel like a big deal at all to get something done. So, you know, I feel like the two can really exist. I feel like you can love yourself and accept yourself and, you know, be intuitive about your body and all of that and still change things if you want to. Okay. This is another one. Maybe I should do a full episode on this one because I get it all the time, but somebody asked, why don't I want kids?

I was just talking to someone about this yesterday. I really respect all the moms out there. truly. I know it's such a joy and such a responsibility and I don't know how moms do it, how they do it all. Personally, I really just can't fathom wanting to have a little person that grows into a big person that I have to worry about for my entire life, like for the rest of my life. and suddenly I would have less freedom and have to tend to this person forever. It's just, it's just a no for me. There's just no part of it whatsoever that's attractive to me. But that could be because like I said earlier, I'm kind of living out my 20s and my 30s, like going back to school and traveling and just enjoying being an adult with the ability

to do whatever I want whenever I want. So maybe I'll want them in a few years, but. I think there's a lot more to it than the freedom part. You know, I just, I don't, I don't have that, like, maternal thing in me. For my dog, I have it. But that's really it. And other people's kids, I love my niece and my nephew, but, you know, I can, I can give them back. Okay. Moving on. Does anyone tell me that Chloe Grace Moritz is my twin? Yes, all the time. And I, could be her mother. So thank you. I appreciate that. Did I get a lip lift? Yes, I have an episode from the beginning of this year going over this talking about all my beauty procedures. I also have my

surgeons, Dr. Talley and Dr. Mascarro on. So look for those episodes. We go way into it. Did I move in together with my husband before getting engaged and do I recommend it? Yes. So we talk about this on his episode from the beginning of the year as well. So we went to Vietnam over Christmas four months into dating when we were first together. And when we came back, he was like, so you should just like leave your suitcases here. And so I moved a bunch of clothes and whatnot over. But I kept my apartment until he proposed, which was really important for me to feel independent. And I'd spend nights there a couple times a week. until we got engaged. So, you know, I was mostly here, but I also had my own space, which,

you know, I know some people doesn't make sense to do that financially. For me, it was just important for, you know, my sense of, like, independence and security. But ultimately, yeah, I would say I do recommend living together before you get engaged, living with someone reveals a lot about them. So I think it's beneficial prior to getting engaged or at least prior to getting married. I'm having trouble speaking because I am just coming off to back-to-back podcast episodes. So my brain is mush. I apologize. Moving on. How do I feel as a blonde? That is a brunette slash blonde for those who don't know. I feel more natural, but I'm still trying to find the perfect shade. I like where I am now, but I feel like my roots are a little too dark. I want to be a little more honey. So we're working on it. It's a process, but it definitely

makes my skin appear less washed out and pink, which I love. And I just felt like this year, you know, not keeping up with like the maintenance, the nails, the lash extensions, the hair color, hair extensions. It was so refreshing and it made me just want to kind of get back to my roots, pun intended. So here I am. Okay. Tips to encourage families. family members to live a healthy lifestyle. This is kind of a recovery thing, but I would say attraction rather than promotion. And I think that can apply to a lot of different things in life. So nobody wants to be told what to do when it comes to their lifestyle habits.

You know, if anything, in my experience, if you tell someone what to do, it makes them want to do the opposite. But maybe seeing you cook healthy meals or going for a walk or run or a workout. and, you know, seeing you experience the benefits of that will make them want to do the same. And I always talk about this example, but you can add healthy things to their life. So with my husband, he's healthy and he works out and he eats pretty well. But I started sending him off to work with a green juice in the morning because I know that when he's at work, you know, he's in a rush and he's just scarfing down a sandwich or whatever pizza, whatever. it is. And he's probably not getting like necessarily the most nutritious food, nutrient-dense food. So instead of trying to overhaul everything and like control, you know, text his assistant to get him

the salad or whatever crazy food police stuff that I was definitely contemplating, I realized that I can just send him off with a green juice. I'm adding something. And that also helps with like the resentment. You know, nobody wants anything to be taken away from them. So, and now he craves it. So, yeah, instead of trying to overhaul everything or take things away, just add where you can and then, like, ask them if they want to go for a walk with you. It's just these little things that can add up. What is the most important thing I learned this year?

This is kind of back to the first question, the biggest lesson. But I would say, like, just appreciate everything. don't take anything for granted. And I have to say this perspective definitely came from COVID and everything that's happened as a result of that, but also my own health issues this fall. When I started losing my hearing and couldn't walk or drive or function for a few weeks, it was horrible. And it wasn't life-threatening.

You know, at first I thought it was a brain tumor or something. But still, I realized how fragile life. is. You know, I had this perspective from getting sober, but that was different because this health issue and the health issues that so many people are experiencing this year are largely out of our control. When the hearing and the vestibular issues and the balance issues started happening to me and nobody could figure out what was wrong and it was getting progressively worse and I couldn't function and I needed meds just to, you know, stand up without falling sideways. I had a breaking point where I was sobbing on my bathroom floor. Very dramatic, I know, but I was just thinking I would

give anything to feel normal and healthy again. And I took a picture, which I'll keep on my phone, of like just this snot-covered, puffy, ugly crying face because I don't want to forget it, you know, feeling in that moment like I can't believe I've taken my health for granted up until now or or just my life. I've taken my life for granted and the freedom to get in the car and drive when I want to and not have to take medication and, you know, benzos to get out of bed. It was awful, awful, awful. So that would, maybe that's my answer for the first question, the biggest lesson. One question that I get asked all the time is about what supplements or vitamins I take. I know it feels like there are so many options out there and it can be really difficult to navigate.

And I've been there. So I want to tell you about one of my favorites, which is ritual. So ritual is amazing because they use the highest quality ingredients. They are all traceable. So you know exactly what you're putting in your body. They are really clean. There are no artificial colorants or fillers. They are vegan friendly.

They are gluten-free. but there are two reasons why I really love them, okay? So one is that they have a minty flavor. So I'm not getting that weird supplement aftertaste, especially with Omega-3s, fish oil. You guys know what I'm talking about. So that's huge. And then the other is that they have a delayed release. So I don't get nauseous when I take them. This is my big problem with supplements. And it's actually made me just not take them in the past because I just cannot get past it. So with ritual, I take them and I am fine. So ritual makes healthy habits so easy. Your multivitamins are delivered to your door every month with free shipping always. You can start, you can snooze, you can cancel your subscription anytime. And if you don't

love ritual within your first month, they will refund your first order. You deserve to know what's in your multivitamin. That's why ritual is offering my listeners 10% off during your first three months. All you have to do is visit ritual.com slash blonde to start your ritual today. That's ritual. com, R-I-T-U-A-L dot com, slash blonde, B-L-O-N-D-E, to start today. What's my daily spiritual routine? So in the morning, the first thing I do is pray, then I get my macha and I go read my morning books. So right now it's a page out of the Daily Stoic, Ryan Holiday, a page of Marcus Aurelius Meditations. I'm reading the Hayes translation. Let's see. A page of Tolstoy's, a calendar of wisdom. So it's another kind of daily stoic like book where it's a reading per day.

And a page from around the year with Emmett Fox. And then I do my 20-minute meditation. And then I do my 20-minute meditation. and then I am good to go. Okay, any experience with Tretton Owen? I kind of touched on it earlier, but I also go over this in my last solo episode from November, I believe, so you can go back and listen to that. But yes, I use 0.01, I believe it is, and just start slow once a week.

You know, you don't have to do it all at once. Start once a week, and then until your skin gets used to that, then do twice a week and just build up. really, really slowly. Do I eat red meat? Yes, occasionally if I crave it. Do I ever feel too old to go back to school? I did for so many years and that's why I didn't do it. And then this year, I realized every year that passes, I still think about going back to school and I'm getting older every year. So I either need to get over that mindset and do it or let it go. You know, I was kind of at the crossroads. And honestly, I talked to so many people who went back in their 30s and 40s,

and every single person said it was one of the things they are the most proud of. And I have to say, being older, having life experience, having time management skills, going to school because you want to, it gives you a major advantage. It's never too late. And I'm just going to say it. I'm proud to say that I finished this year with the 4.0, which I could not have done in my 20s. So if it's something that you keep thinking about, just do it. Oh, okay, here's a salty one. I've never heard this one before. Not.

Everyone wants to know how much older my husband is than my dad. Well, I don't think anyone really cares, but I mean, that's such low-hanging fruit, at least come with something original. So I was talking to my girlfriend this morning about this actually because she asked what kind of questions people send in for these. And I told her about, you know, kind of bitter ones like this. And her reaction was so priceless and poignant. She's so sweet like she never will say a bad thing about anybody. And she thought about it for a second. And then she said, I wonder what the first thing is that these people think of when they wake up in the morning. And like, that's a lot. And like, that just captured all of it. It must be so miserable to try to hurt other people's feelings or

make them feel badly, especially about the person they're married to. I mean, you have to have a lot of bitterness in your heart for that. And the person who sent this in looks to be quite a bit older than my husband and my dad. So probably time to direct that energy elsewhere. Okay, moving on. Do I ever get lonely with my husband working so much. No, because I've always been just as busy with my own stuff and he's always been really good about making it a point to be home for dinner, you know, unless they have a night shoot or something, which isn't very often. And he's very present when he's here because he's not on social media. He's not addicted to his phone. You know, it's like when he's here, he's here. So we spend, you know, quality time, nights, weekends, mornings, all of that.

Have I always had my fashion sense? Yes, I have been fashion obsessed my entire life. I had a makeshift design studio in my basement when I was younger where I would try to make clothes and put on fashion shows with my friends. And I would read every magazine cover to cover and cut them out and make collages and make binders and design my own clothes. I mean, I was like crazy obsessed. Always have been. So, yes, I've always have been very specific about what I like. And I'm surprised I don't work in fashion.

How do I find courage to do something that scares me? Well, I don't find courage, you know? You don't find it. The courage comes when you do the thing. This is kind of similar. did I get the confidence to start a podcast? Well, true story. When I started a podcast, I was turning down requests left and right to go on other people's because I was scared. And the thought of having my own was like laughably terrifying. But I just did it. And then I did it and did it and did it and

did it some more. And eventually the confidence came. And sometimes it's not there and I have to fake it and then other times it's just so natural. So, you know, one thing about being sober and having kind of a redo on life is that I really don't waste it. I like to think I don't waste it. I go for what I want. I don't let my thoughts get in my way, which is a huge gift. That perspective is such a huge gift. What are my insecurities? Well, aging, really, really struggling with the aging thing. I know I'm young. But it. In a city that's obsessed with youth, it can feel like aging is this terrible thing when really it's a privilege. So I think we can all see that more clearly this year. But, you know, it's really tough

being in this industry and living in L.A. and being in this bubble. How many calories do I eat a day? Seriously, I have no idea. Could not even begin to tell you unless I sat down and like put everything in my fitness pal, which is not a road I will ever good. down again. So I think I'll probably leave it at that. You know, I know that some people need to keep track of calories. If they're legitimately trying to lose weight, have health issues, whatever. For me, it was a pretty precarious place to be mentally. And I will just say that our bodies have different needs at different times. So I try to stay away from the calorie thing unless, you know, it's medically suggested to you.

Am I getting the vaccine? Yes, I am going to be getting the vaccine. My bio class this year focused a lot on vaccines, the good and the bad, and particularly MRI vaccines. And I think it's fascinating. I think it's amazing. I don't really have any hangups about it. Do I still deal with body image issues?

only if I sit on Instagram all day and scroll around the explore page. I laugh, but like truly that's it, kind of like what I was saying before. You know, those thoughts creep in depending on where I'm directing my energy. If I stay in my lane and I stay in my own world and follow people who inspire me in other ways and pour my energy into my passions and the people that I love, then I'm good. but if I end up on that explore page or, you know, some models page and then I go to another, it's just a dark road to go down. So I really try to like not scroll a lot and really control what I'm seeing.

Tips for quitting drinking when you need it for anxiety or depression relief. I would say find support and a means to stop drinking, whether it's a 12-step recovery program or therapy or something else, just something so you're not going through it alone. And a place where you can be totally open and honest. And you might find that you're amazed. I mean, I thought that I had the world's worst anxiety until I stopped drinking and using. And I realized that the drinking and using and the emotions and the consequences from that was fueling the anxiety. Biggest regret thus far in life. I can't really say that I have any regrets. I'm truly. just so happy with my life and the way it's unfolded in ways that I could never have dreamed

or orchestrated for myself. But maybe not finishing school when I was younger because I would like to be in grad school right now or done by now. But, you know, again, it's like I can't really regret that because I would be in a totally different place. I mean, who knows where I would have ended up if I had done that. So, you know, who am I to say that this isn't exactly where I am supposed to be and will lead me to exactly where I'm meant to be next? Hardest thing I've ever had to realize for myself. I am accountable for everything. I am accountable for my emotions. Nobody else is. I am accountable for my actions and the result of my actions. Nobody else. I'm accountable for my life, you know, period, full stop. My whole life prior to getting sober was blaming everyone and everything for

the things that happened to me and simultaneously being overdependent and over demanding on everyone around me. So emotional adulthood and emotional sobriety is taking responsibility for all of that. And it's not always the easy thing to do. It's easier to blame people, places and things. but once you realize it, it's pretty profound. Do I want to live anywhere besides L.A.? Well, you guys know we have a place in New York, which is my favorite, but sadly, we haven't been much lately. Other than that, I'd love to get a place in the mountains somewhere as well and spend

some extended time in Europe. There's a lot that I'd like to do outside of L.A. We'll just put it that way. Does it bother me when people drink around me? Not at all. It bothers me when people who aren't sober don't drink because they think it'll make me feel weird. Seeing alcohol is not a trigger. It's not going to make me want it.

The weird thing is not drinking if I know you drink. And I know you want to drink, but you're not drinking because I'm there. Okay. Rapping this up, a favorite place to shop for unique classics. Well, I pretty much solely shop at forward.com, Netaporte, Elise Walker in the Palisades, intermix. Sometimes I have a girl at Neiman's who sends me PDFs of everything new that they get in, which is problematic. And moda operandi, I don't know if I'm saying that right, matches. There's a few others that I'm drawing a blank on, but mostly I would say forward for my online.

line shopping and at least Walker for my in-person shopping, which is in the Pacific Palisades. They have one in Newport as well, and I think they have one in the Valley now. Okay. What am I most excited for next year? Probably what everybody else is excited for, which is everything, seeing my family, traveling, hugging people, going to dinner, all of it. Let's just hope and pray that things get better. And now I'm going to share some of your uplifting stories, a couple funny stories, and we're

going to close it out. Okay, it's hard to pick because I got a lot. And a lot of people had significant growth this year. But this I really loved. I know a lot of people had to cancel their weddings. And this is just such a good idea. So this is a heartwarming story about a wedding. So she says, my husband of almost two months, and I were supposed to get married on December 19th this year in front of 250 people. We live in San Francisco, but I'm from Raleigh, North Carolina, so the wedding was going to be in North Carolina. In July, we realized the wedding of 250 people would absolutely not happen, potentially for the next two years, so we canceled it. By now, you're probably feeling deja vu, as this story is likely a common story for many of your listeners.

So we decided to get married in October with just our parents, my grandma and our siblings. I was sad, truly heartbroken. We have so many friends and so many mutual friends, and we are both very close with our aunts and uncles and cousins. I tried not to suppress my sadness as much as possible, but it was hard. Maybe tried to suppress. I don't know. Then the wedding weekend arrived, and it was truly the most uplifting weekend of our lives. Our mothers put together a recipe book filled with recipes from our 250 original guests. Such a good idea. Our phones overflowed with messages. We live streamed the event, which made everyone feel like it was just them and us. Looking back, it was the most intimate, most joyous event we probably

could have ever had. To be clear, we wish COVID never happened, of course, and that we could have hugged all 250 people. But we think the new event allowed us to connect with all of our loved ones so much more than we could have ever dreamed to during the big event. I love that so much. I love the idea of a recipe book. That's also a really good gift idea. So unfortunately, this is coming out after Christmas, but there's an idea for next year. I got so many uplifting stories and people got really creative with their weddings. And a lot of people kind of had these awakenings and changed jobs and went back to school. And a lot of people leaned into service work. And so, I got so much uplifting stuff. I also got some really funny stories. You know, some people

traded wine for toilet paper, which is so 2020. I had a girl who like fell and broke a ceramic vase and it broke everywhere and she also broke her two front teeth when she fell and she was scrambling around trying to figure out what was her tooth and what was the thing that broke. And so I got some really good ones. But since I'm pressed for time here, I'm just going to take you to the grand finale. So she says, anonymous sender says, so due to COVID, I had to take my GRE, the grad school acceptance exam from home. It's just like the SAT and that there are no breaks or notes or any of that. I was just taking it from my college apartment bedroom.

halfway through my first section, my stomach starts to turn and I realize I need to go to the bathroom like now. But I couldn't get up because I had an online proctor watching me through my computer screen. So I did what any self-respecting human would do. I shit my pants. Full on, shit my pants. I finished my section and raced to my bathroom to change my pants and wash my hands and ended up getting the best score I've ever received. So I guess that was a win. I feel a little bit desensitized to it because I've read it so many times and read it to my husband, like I said, and we were dying.

I mean, the part when she says that she did what any self-respecting human would do, I actually thought of that because I had to take all these proctored exams where they watch you through the camera on your computer and you can't go anywhere. And my thing was just like I have to pee all the time. I always have to pee. And I'm always chugging water. And so that was what I was nervous about. I never thought about this situation happening. And, you know, this girl is, she is committed. She is my hero.

She said she finished it and came out of her room in tears. She was laughing so hard she had to tell her roommates. She said it was the most 20-20 thing to happen to me. this year. I have to agree. That is very 2020. So I hope that that gave you guys a laugh. Thank you. Thank you so much for listening, for supporting, being on this journey this year, and tuning in and listening to me ramble like this. And we have big things in store for 2021, lots of big guests. And let's just hope it's better than this year. So thank you again, and I will talk to you guys next year.

I hope you enjoyed that episode. If you liked it, and if you like the show in general, please take a second to rate, review, and subscribe. It goes a long way, and it's actually the best way to support the show. Also, if you want to see more about each episode, you can head over to The Blonde Files podcast on Instagram. I'm always posting about each episode there or over on my personal page at Ariel Lori. Auto-hure with Sunny Cars feels as if the children will not be with.

Kiselsrandle, sandvore. Act is forcare, verdwined. Vacantity can chaotic be. But who zorgloose an auto-hueert, says, Uno-dos, no stress. No, no-vure-no-verwashed-cost. Always, full-ledged. So, auto-hueur, zonderergen-sorg.

Go to your rise-advise. of sunnycars.